Hollywood Handbook - Adam Scott, Our Close Friend

Episode Date: March 31, 2026

The Boys are super excited to have ADAM SCOTT (not SANDLER) on the show. Check out Adam's spooky new movie, Hokum, in theaters May 1st!   Get a Hat Pack Hat here! Check out Sean and Hayes’s bonus shows at Patreon.com/HollywoodHandbook Listen on the iHeartRadio App!   HOSTSSean Clements - https://www.instagram.com/seanclements/Hayes Davenport - https://bsky.app/profile/hayesdavenport.bsky.social PRODUCER/EDITORKevin Bartelt - https://www.youtube.com/@kevinjbartelt EXECUTIVE PRODUCERMatt Apodaca - https://www.instagram.com/mattapodaca/See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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So, yeah. This is great. This is great. This is great. This is so good. Adam. Yeah. Adam S. Just like we drew it up. It's so good.

It's awesome. so good. It's so exciting. This rocks. Cards on the table. Obviously, we want to say, you know. Cards on the table? Three kings. Wow. Right?

Not a bad hand. No, we do want to be transparent. That's a lot of what the show is about. We obviously, you know, are thrilled to have you. This is really good. we When you walked in here

is like awesome It's Really Because when I walked in Even just seeing you walk in Despite the I'm not Sticker shock

Like So it's so it's So obviously it's been a journey It's been a journey getting you here Yeah You know we had Ben Ben

Yeah Ben was on We just call him Ben Ben Stiller Yeah So he was here And we asked him, we were like, you know, can you get your famous friend Adam to come do the show?

And I think we, I don't know if he said it or we said it, but it was he, we went back and forth. Yeah. With Ben. Yeah. He wanted us to hook up our home plumbing to Stiller's soda. To reach out in exchange for reaching out to you. He, I guess, is hoping to make it less of like a consumer soda and more of like a public utility. Right. Or like how they go, they sell you filters, water filters for your home.

So all the water in your house is filtered. So what he is hoping. It's be stiltered. It was still stiltered. Yeah. All of your water would be stiltered. Yes. He is also hoping to brand the filter that allows you to reverse engineer the,

the stiller soda into water. And it would mine Bitcoin at the same time. So it's like, and that that would heat your home. Okay, let me get this straight. It's a filter that turns all tap water coming into your home. No, no. Into stiller soda and then another. What's coming in, you wanted to get it straight?

Yeah. You don't have it straight at all. Okay. What's coming into the home is stillers. Yes. Soda. Yes. Oh, so he's pumping it in directly to your home.

That's coming into the pipes. And then there's a fencer. filling the toilet tank. You get your stiller's bill at the end and you go, it has a little like, this is what the average household uses. Right. And it's like 20% root beer.

30%. Yeah. The little bar graph. Shirley Temple. Shirley Temple. Yes. You know, going to go to Shirley Cola.

Yeah, right. Sure. Um, and then you need to get a, you need to get a filter to turn it back into water. But his thing is like, you're going to actually find that you don't want this. You don't need that much water.

And is there a problem with the tap water being carbonated or that's it's i mean does ben has been addressed that there's a there directions that come with it then you just put it on the table and then and they he sells a table too that you can rest the water until it kind of like it resolves itself oh i see so then it it flattens out yeah it's like overnight oats for water sure yeah overnight water uh overnight overnight overnight Stiller? Overnight. Overnight with Ben Stiller.

Yeah. Overnight with Ben Stiller. He was pitching overnight ghost because he's the goat. Yeah, that's pretty good. He's goaded with the sauce. This thing is like it can also be a sauce. You can dip stuff. Yeah.

Sure. So it's on the table. As it's flattening out, you can dip different foods into it. That's pretty good. And so, and we're still going back and forth on that. And so the hope is actually maybe he'll, now that you are already here, maybe if we do figure this out, he'll reach out to you

and maybe you'll come back, like, next week or something. Like, if we're pretty close to- Oh, next week. Yeah. Like, to figuring this deal out. We're dotting the eyes and crossing the T's. With Ben, regarding me. Separate deal.

Separate deal with Ben, but it is regarding me and how often I come here. Yeah, it has, that's what it has become. That's what it's become. Okay. I think when? Well, cards on the table. Cards on the table. Which we do want to...

I thought we already put the cards on the table. Are they, have they been picked up? So I don't know who said... An ace, a jack, and a 10. Oh, thanks. I think, solid 10. Ace and Jack are better than 10.

Well, but you're a 10 out of 10, and I'm a jackass, jack off. Okay, so I'm a fool. I play the fool on the show, and I'm used to that role, and that's okay with me. And you can dunk on me, you can score points. on me. I got a thick skin. It's really charming. Don't make fun of the way I look or anything. But we make the best of it and we are going to do that today.

Why didn't? That's why I started talking because I could tell you it was about which was like, oh, I get all free reign. Let me just hold on. Just go after this guy. Yeah. Why would I do that? So, yeah. But the atom of it all.

Yes. Adam of it. Which, by the way, so awesome to have you here. It's really, this is very. This is really good too. We so really good too. When we, I don't know if we ever even had this conversation or we just both kind of ended up in the same like feeling the same. We've been working together a long. A lot of conversations. We've been working together a long time. And so like we end up having this kind of like unspoken thing where we're just thinking the same thing like each other's thoughts before they even happen to each other. Get tied up in this. Well that's great though to have that kind of

relationship with someone you're working. Normally it is really good. Yeah. Sometimes if one person misspeaks, there's a sort of snowball effect where then you both start doing it. Oh, and you both start saying things. And tripping over each other. Our legs are tied together. Okay. So as an example, maybe you guys are thinking, this is like a hypothetical. Yeah. Ben Stiller's coming on the show. We got to get his famous friend Adam Sandler on the show. Yeah. Right. but then somebody says something wrong or not even wrong just different I wouldn't say wrong I would say different so it started out as a thing I don't remember I don't remember I don't

know what I know is what I know is a result when you walked in here we were like this is awesome too yes so this and this pumping high-fiving this entire this entire thing this entire time you've been expecting Adam Sandler to come to visit the show. I would never expect. I have. I would never set expectations for something like that to happen.

If the universe allows for something like that to happen, I'm open to it. I'm always going to accept. You know, podcasting is when hard work meets preparation. Is that right? We accept not

podcasting. Podcasting is when hard Work meets preparation. When hard work meets preparation. You have. Yeah. Not said. A lot of it is unspoken like we were saying. Sure.

I mean, by and large, I would say all the podcasts I listen to and have seen on video, you're right. It's all about hard work. You can tell, right? It's always these guys measure twice cut once. Because the podcast, in the best case scenario, appears effortless. Yeah, but I'm just going to say I feel like that's because by and large

it is effortless. Like there's not a lot of effort being put into it. That's what it looks like from the outside. In the best case it looks that way. When you get your little charcoal briquette, you think that looks easy. I could probably do that. You don't see the guys getting lowered down

into the mines. Yeah. Coming back. Pick axe. Is that where you think charcoal briquettes come from? Covered. Yeah, they have to get it out of the wall. Got to chop it out of there.

How do they get it into that little shape? Does it come that way? Well, again, that's the part you don't see. Yeah, you don't know. Who knows how they do that? I believe there's maybe a guy, like a squeezer guy. Oh, yeah, the squeezer. There's like a, yeah.

He has that shape. One of the dwarfs, I think, is squeezer. I would imagine. I don't think they call them that. Squeezers. I just I can't keep track of this stuff Are we allowed to say Yeah let's just say

The whatever Our intention is always positive I like those guys To help yeah we are you know We are never trying to degrade anyone It's a minefield out there you know It's a mine shaft It's a mind shaft

First podcast First podcast No no in fact I've done lots of podcasts I was just doing a podcast yesterday in fact. Awesome. Another one.

Wonder where you got that idea. Sorry, it seems like that bummed you out. No. When I just said that. He said awesome. He said awesome, but I'm looking at him and Sean literally

suddenly looked sad and looked down at the ground. Other stuff. Stuff at home. Okay. Yeah. All right. Well, good. I'm glad.

He has stuff at home that's kind of running around on the ground. And so it's like making him, it's putting him in this like, I'm always aware. Got to have eyes on the ground. Oh, I say. You got bugs in your house? What?

You got bugs in your house? I've had bugs in my house. Makes you look down a lot, huh? Makes it sound like you don't. I feel like they're everywhere. Well, we got rid of them. You have to get rid of them. Okay, well, you have to understand when you do that, they go to someone else's house.

No, they kill them. I might have your bugs. I don't have, no one has my bugs. You get an exterminator, they kill the bugs and get rid of them. Isn't that? No. They, that, they, they, they shoe them into someone else's house? Yeah.

You can take care of it. And then meanwhile, I'm up to my goddamn ankles and silverfish. Is that why I'm here because you feel like you have silverfish in your house because of me? Adam, you're here because it's a great, it's going to be a great episode. That's why you're here. I mean, it's like, killer. So, so Ben had said like, oh, we'll get Adam. We'll get you Adam.

We'll make this deal. And like, Adam's doing severance. So I'm working with him. And we're like, holy fucking shit. Adam Sandler is doing severance. I'm not at which that like would have been frankly a little strange but also you got to be curious I think we thought and again I don't think we ever had this conversation we thought it might be at least interesting to try you know it's like how there's two guys yeah you're two guys I'm too oh sure

on severance is that what you mean if one of them was like sorry that is like that's snapping something into focus for me about the show where I was like he's being so weird. Yeah. It's finally like coming together. He's two guys. Yeah. Go ahead. And I've been waiting for him to get to this and he's been

you know, he's working on it. Sure. And he would come home every day and go to the fridge and I would be like, what's up? Uh-huh. He was just, you know how you just open the fridge and you're just looking at anymore? He's just looking in the fridge. You're like, I know I'm looking for something, but what is it?

I was like, okay, you bring something home. And I didn't want to be like, it's two guys. I knew he had to get there. Oh, wow. So that's why it's so good that you're here too. What is it that you think was happening? So, look, obviously, like, look, let's say first, amazing show. Oh, thank you.

Congrats on the show. Thanks. What I thought was happening when I, on my, first watch. Okay. This guy's so weird. Yeah. Yeah.

Okay. Is he like, does he know what he's doing? Right. You know? And I also was going like, well, first I was going, did they mean to do this? Oh, like, you know? I thought there was a mistake. Like, I actually thought that they had had one idea for the show and then they kind of

changed their mind and they had left in some of the footage from the original like pilot they shot or something. Yeah. And then just sort of rolled with it. Right. Because I was going, it really feels like two different guys in a lot of this. Yeah. But I was like, oh, maybe Adam forgot or maybe some of this is the real Adam.

Like me. Like it's intercut. Like there's a behind the scenes sort of version of you at home. And I forgot that they were filming me kind of thing. Yeah, I had a couple different ways into it. Nothing felt quite right. But this is actually clicking. Makes a little more sense.

A little more. It feels to me like the, the, The theory you would come up with takes far more effort and is far more complicated than the actual show. Then just shooting you living your life? No. Life is complicated. I think conceptually me, the show saying now we're leaving the show and we're going

home with the actor portraying this character and we're going to explore the home life of the actor. And they weren't saying that, which that was the first thing I said when I came in the room is like, let's get a little VO here where they say, hey, you're not watching. the show anymore. Right. This is Adam's house. But it just seems like your mind going to that place and you coming up with the theory

that that's what's happening here is far more complicated than the simple, like if you just watched the show, you probably would have figured it out. And to that end, now I will. Okay. Were you like doing something else while you were watching the show? Well, I got some stuff going on at home. You know, obviously there is like an insect. There's like bug issue happening.

And so it is tough to kind of focus completely on a show because they are. You've been shooting them. You've been shooting the silverfish with. It's legal. With poison darts. Poison darts. Poison dart bazook, yeah. And so when you hit a, a silverfish, do you do one at a time?

You try and hit them with the poison dart bazooka? Would that I could get one of those buggers? They are so quick. Yeah, they're fast. But I, yeah, and there's been some ricochet issues. And you need someone to load the back. Yeah. You need, so you need a second person with the equipment.

Yeah, I got an assistant. And have you damaged your home? I would imagine. Yeah. His home is poisoned. Oh, good Lord. It's mainly poisoned darts in there now. Oh, my God, it's just all.

No wonder you weren't paying full attention to severance. Oh, yeah. No, I've been pretty sick. God, and anyone who enters your house probably ends up with some sort of issue. Yeah, we're just happening less and less. People coming over. Yeah. I'm not going to come over with, you know, your house just filled to the rim with poison bazooka darts.

The hope is that you'll be so covered in silverfish, which are as yet unafflicted by the poison, that they will actually create a protective layer. And then the poison house. Sort of an armor. Yeah. Well, Silverfish, you know, they do protect you in certain situations. Well, say more about that. Yeah. About the Silverfish.

Yeah. Well, Silverfish, that's their main. I mean, everyone says when they see Silverfish, like, what the hell are these things even for? You know, they're just a pest. They're defenders. But in fact, they're defenders of human beings. If a burglar comes or something. If a burglar comes, Silverfish.

covers them head to toe. Well, imagine trying to find jewelry in my house. You can't because there's all these silver fish everywhere. So it's like to differentiate between that and my valuables. Exactly, because everything looks silver. Mm-hmm. No, that's smart. Yeah.

You know what? My promise today, I'm going to stop shooting them. I think that's a good idea both for you. He's hoping that they're listening to that sense. So they'll be like kind of. but won't they hear this as well if they're listening to this? I think after hearing that he's going to stop shooting them,

I think they would probably turn up, have a huge party. All right, guys. So we can speak freely now that they're not. Now it's all good. Okay, they don't protect shit. No, they're not defending anything, right? Yeah, I was, you were convincing me.

You were selling me on it. Listen, I'm an actor. Okay, that's my job. And that's what we started to figure out. The, the, speaking of you acting. Yeah. You're going to the festivals? You're doing these big festival movies?

Oh. Doing some kind of spooky movie? I did. I was just at the South by Southwest festival with a new movie. Love it. The best. Austin. Keep it weird.

Austin, Texas. Yeah. That's what it says on the T-shirt. Sure. Great town. Barbecue sauce. Yeah, barbecue. Well, barbecue.

Yeah. The sauce is usually on the side. Yeah. Yeah, I love it. Stiller's coming out with a barbecue. Barbecue sauce soda. Flavored. Barbecue sauce soda.

Yeah. That's great. That'll, I'm sure that'll be delicious. Mm-hmm. So, yeah, we were down there in Austin. You know, Austin's, you know, right in the middle of Texas. It's a great, great town. And the movie, and I don't know if you've read about this, but it's so freaky, right?

And can I say this? Ain't going to scare me, Jack. Oh, really? Not going to scare me. Okay. It's fake. The movie? fake?

And he's going to, well, he does have an obligation to tell everyone else in the theater before the movie begins. That it's fake. That it is fake. And during. It would be a dereliction of duty to allow something so fake to play out and just let all of your fellow man be tricked. See, I feel like, I mean, I understand what you're saying, but I feel like, I mean, I understand

what you're saying, but I feel like. that's part of the fun of a scary movie is the suspension of disbelief that the audience, like they're going there to be scared. They enjoy it, right? So if someone's yelling out, this is fake, they're already aware of that. So you yell out, this is fake and it just sort of, it's a nuisance more than anything, I would imagine. There's a presumption at times, I think, with you that people are much more aware of kind of the process behind what you're doing. Like even with severance where it was like, you're like, what you're talking about is so complicated. I'm going like, what were you doing?

Like, I don't know what's going on, you know? And then to go like, oh, they know it's fake. And it's like, well, they will now. I'm going to tell them because I do not want them to feel scared. And I'm not scared. And it's not going to scare. And it's not going to scare me. Because you were watching Severance and you thought it was half fictional, half true life.

When you see a scary movie, are you scared because you feel like this might actually be happening? Well, I don't watch them. Oh, I see. Because they're scary. Because, yeah. The intention a lot of them is to scare me. And because I'm sitting here with you now, at least this one, I will check out, if only to report that it is fake to anyone near me. Is there a ghost in it?

Well, if I say that, I'll be spoiling something, you know? Right. We don't want to do that. Okay. You know what I like to say about scary movies? And you guys can write this down if you want, is that the goal of a scary movie is similar to the goal of a comedy. Because in a comedy, you're looking for the involuntary reaction of laughter. And in a scary movie, you're looking for the involuntary reaction of being scared.

So in that sense, they have something in common. Pen. Pen. I told you you might want to write this down. Pen. Right now. Why don't you guys have pens? We've never had someone. We've never had something like this happened.

Have I exploded on mind like this? You said you can write it down if you want and I thought, I'm not going to want to. I've never wanted to write anything down on this show. And what just happened, and careful with the lamp. And what just happened was you busted this whole fucking thing. And I need to think of like what are we doing with this episode? And is comedy fake as well? Well, it depends.

Yeah. You know it's not fake, Sean? Uh-huh. You know what's not fake? Is the reaction when you get a laugh. It's not fake. That's real. And I thought you were coming in with a pen.

Can we fly the pen in, please? I thought it was a pen too. He even went like this. Oh, geez. All right. These are actually good pens, too. You write it on your hand. Adam.

Do you want me to repeat it or are you? I am trying to figure out how to handle this situation properly. And how has there ever been a thing where the podcast is just like, that's the news for that night? Yeah. You know how every night they do the news, right? Yeah. But it's never a podcast. but if something were happening on a podcast that were more important than the news

could it then be the news for that night switch swap it out like how would you get that out to the world as quickly as possible it would have to be the news yeah sorry have these pens been in the freezer or something cold as hell right i went to write on my hand it was cold yeah he pulled them out of a freezer yeah yeah but yeah the the podcast feels like it should maybe be the news now. Right. Like you need to put this out immediately and just instead of Hollywood handbook, just say the news so people will listen to it.

I'd love to get the brand out there. Yeah. Can no one ever know? Just sorry, just to just to walk through it. Like as we go, like, I know how I felt when I just learned it. I see it all now. Like it's just like it's all. opened up to me and I'm walking back through you know the past several years of film cinema and

going like wait a second thank you for saying the word cinema by the way because that's really that's really what it all comes down to I just want to let you know he is spelling it with an S oh okay like Kristen cinema not no like S I and like he's thinking of a specific genre of of filmed entertainment. It's really just the movie seven. I see. Cinema meaning sin. Just like the sin.

Oh, that's so, you know what? That's so cool. Yeah, yeah. I get really dark sometimes. Oh, man. I don't want to live inside your head. It's a bad neighborhood, brother.

He doesn't go in there alone. No, if I didn't have this to get it out, this creative outlet. Right, right, right. No, it's like a... Robber room, straight jacket, you know, and throw away they can. Napoleon hat.

Letting some steam out, just turning a spigot a little bit and letting that steam out every week. It's the release. Otherwise it'll blow. Good for you. But I am, I am so inhibited of this idea and yet I wonder if this were to be the news, the gates would be removed. Yes? The creative explosion that could result from this may actually overwhelm the end up the entire ecosystem. Or now that all I feel like I understand all meaning, all meaning is lost in a

right. Right. When everything becomes meaningful, nothing has meaning. Nothing has meaning. The horror movie didn't scare me. The idea of the horror movie didn't scare me, your movie wouldn't scare me. This scares me. Yeah. This scares me. Well, when everything becomes activated, it is frightening at first. Now I'm scared. Yeah. Because it is like, wait a minute. Like once everyone has, has the secret. Yeah. Like there is no secret. So you just sharing that, I go, this is a dangerous man.

Yeah. That's why I want to say, you're welcome, but I also want to say, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And I want to say, thank you. And I also want to chastise you. I want to accept the apology, but I also do want to punish you in some way. Oh, interesting. I already said, you're welcome and I'm sorry.

So I feel like that takes care of all of it. So there's no punishment needed. And I haven't determined a punishment either. Well, I won't accept any punishment whatsoever. Yes. And because I have not yet landed on, yes, what the proper punishment would be, that's not even something. Right. And it's a surprise.

In the same way that I now realize comedy and being scared or designed and create this response. Be careful. You're going to be on punishment too. A punishment is also designed to create a response. a response right and i'm just saying i'm immune to any punishment it's not going to wow yeah and that's going to force me to kind of put my thing in cap on and go oh how do you punish the unpunishable man and you also have to realize and maybe maybe consider that i might be manipulating you because i want your punishment to become more and more extreme that he would like

that's right and so maybe by not by not punishing him at all that could be the ultimate punishment is the withholding of it and that hurts me maybe And we don't know for sure, but this is, this is something we talk about all the time on the show. Oh, it's spanking. It's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, it's, yeah, yeah, right? I know what you know, but I know that you know that I know what you know and therefore, I'm spanking you.

How do I spank you? Yeah. So it is, it is, it is actually an dynamic. Well, yes. Yeah. How do I spank you? How do I spank you? Karate chopping does not really.

No, it doesn't do it. But I don't want to hurt my hand either. No. Well, the paddles with the holes drilled in them, so you get a little sway. Yeah. Those work. I've heard. Okay.

And then this is making me think, yes, he does want punishment. And he's actually got a very specific one. I'm immune to any punishment, like I said. Okay. And that's making me want to do it. This guy's good. This fucker's got me dead to rights. Right?

Right where you want me. I'm dancing on your street. rings, man, and I got to say it feels kind of good. Oh, thanks. Thank you. Maybe you spank me. What are you talking about? We're getting the paddle out. Yeah. Yeah.

You guys keep the paddles here, right? Maybe I get a spanking. What? I'm just saying, we're all talking about. He has a show here, and he keeps a bunch of battles. Yeah, yeah. That makes sense. Well, if we're not putting this out, we can really relax.

Well, yeah, well, then we can really do. The silverfish won't hear it. Like, no one else is going to hear it. We could reveal so many secrets. Maybe there's a frequency. For example. I thought he was coming in with another pen. Yeah, well, you said Cal Penn.

And so I thought he was maybe pretty... That he's maybe going to put Cal down at the end of the table. Let's just say this. It would be. If Cal Penn just came in here. I dove in. That's what I miss about. We have Adam Sandler and kept...

Sorry, sorry, sorry, sorry. That's what I miss about, it's fine. He's fine with it. The community that we used to have was just Cal Penn is walking through. He jumps in and he sets down, you know what I mean? Never happens anymore. It doesn't happen as much and it really never happens anymore. What do you think?

Why do you think that is? How did we lose that? But that was Earwolf, right? I'll tell you one way. Bones. It always comes back to the phone. It's like, this will connect you. Right.

It's like a little, it's like a little coffin that we all live in, you know? It is. It's like a little coffin. Yeah. It's a little tiny, yes. That you get inside every day and you seal it up and you're not seeing anyone or talking to anyone. Live inside the coffin. Yeah.

And it's, yeah. Which actually, do you guys mind if I do my duolingo lesson while we're recording? Is that? Oh, sure. Is that the thing you had to keep your phone on for? Yeah, so Lily will sometimes FaceTime me from Duolingo and she's sort of disaffected, kind of like a goth youth, but she will kind of inform me that like I've got a streak that's in danger. And so if she does call, I can't be on like airplane mode or anything. Because I do have to feed the owl, I think. Yeah. Okay. And that means you need to do a particular lesson at a particular time. Feed the owl. Yeah, I don't always understand the media that I ingest. Yeah, you don't need to, though.

Clearly, you're doing fine. It's a vibe. Yeah. It's a feeling you get. It's all vibes for you, it seems. I'm just riding the wave. He's learning something really interesting, which is kind of like what the next generation is going to be speaking.

Yeah. Which is Spanish-Chinese. Oh, wow. So it's going to be a mixture of the two. It's Chinese, the way that. They speak it in Spain, specifically Catalonia. Okay, so in Catalonia, they're speaking a mixture of Spanish and Chinese. Think about a burrito filled with general, so is chicken.

Okay. I'm thinking about that. How would that sound? Well, I feel like it would sound nothing like a language. That's right. Perfect. And that's what it sounds like, is what I was saying. I actually wasn't listening to what Hayes was talking about.

I was just having an idea. You just picture of food. Yeah. And it's because it sounds so delicious. Well, I think it could be pretty good. Yeah. I don't know. I mean, I think it sounds super.

It sounds really interesting. It sounds like something that would be too wet for the tortilla to contain. Hmm. Okay. Well, that's what you're going for. Then, I mean, just to represent, I can hear his voice in my ear, maybe it should be a soda instead. Oh, that's interesting. Maybe there should be a General Sos burrito flavored soda.

It's already too wet. It's already too wet. The tortilla. So she rings the thing out into a can. Yeah. We should let Ben know that we've come up with the next great flavor. The general Saurito. Yes.

Soda. That's delicious. I would love to taste. that but I carbonated. I feel like that would really put the cherry on top. Really benefit. Benefit. I would call him and pitch him right now,

but I have to have it open for Lily. Sure. If there were a ghost in this movie and you don't have to say. Oh, my God. Okay. Might it be in trouble be beneficial to have somebody in the movie who is trained at ghosting. a character who was possibly returning, who we may have been missing for a while. Someone who's been off the scene, but not out of the conversation.

Make the ghost of the movie completely ghosted. Are you talking about getting Max Jennifer in there? You said it, not me, but... Well, I feel like you were going to say that's why I said. Episode 104 lockdown. We saw Max Jennifer tackle some... pretty interesting baddies and keep his cool in some very extreme situations. So if there was a ghost in the movie, not getting you in trouble,

would Professor Max Jennifer be someone who was good to? That is the ultimate crossover that are you guys throwing an idea out there right now? I don't know. Are we locked? I mean, is the cut locked or? Well, yeah, I mean, it's locked. Okay, never mind then, I think. We talk about this though

The stuff is on streaming platforms, right? It's all on the computer It's like a word doc Like you're not like okay This is like we can't change this ever again Well I mean I guess you can I mean this is a really good idea So maybe it's something we should explore

The character could even just be wearing a name tag They could just CGI slap a name tag I think we did wear name tags on the show Yeah yeah I remember I had a pretty high clearance level actually on my IP batch. Yeah. Yeah. For the sound stage we were working on.

Yes. And also for the Bureau investigating paranormal activity. Which was fictional. Yeah. Sorry. So this was another thing. When he was working on ghost, he would come home a lot. Did you think we were actually like harnessing spirits?

and going after monsters. We were certainly talking about a lot and I don't know why, to what end, if there was nothing. We had to throw out everything in the fridge because it was basically open all the time. You just, so you thought everything that we were talking about

while we were making the show, while we were shooting the show, and there were like fake monsters that special effects guys brought in and made, you thought that was all potentially real. Well, they really made the monster. That's true.

That's true. And the monster was chasing, I hope I can say this, my friend. Okay. And that didn't feel very good. Okay. So I guess I would say, yeah, it was like, it was a little stressful for me. And especially with my clearance level, I thought, I probably am the person to tackle some of these issues.

Right. And in some cases, literally tackle, you know, like a background actor or something. So you tackle the background actor? I sure tried. Okay. God damn, guys are built like a brick shit house. Look, I appreciate. Strong background actors.

Well, they're standing all day. They're holding these positions and they're repeating. It's exercise. It's a really hard job. I started out as a background. actor and I can tell you thank you yeah nice dude yeah you can

you can always always count on me pointing that out and talking about how down to earth it is for those who start as background actors you're really about going back just ripping one off I would any day of the week so it's a great job just rip one off

you know what I mean get back in there just go back your roots you know and stand and show them how it's done. Get out of the way or sit. Yeah. So by implication, you're saying that they're doing it wrong. When you say show them how it's done,

you're going to go back there. I've certainly seen it done wrong, like very wrong. It's a bit of a lost art. Yeah. It's a bit of a lost art. And I think it's generational and I think there's a sense of entitlement.

You know, you talked about these being little tiny coffins. Yeah. And it did remind me of something that we do say on the show all the time. which is these millennials are constantly whining about needing a safe space. I got a safe space for them, six feet underground, pretty safe down there. Oh, wow.

Pretty safe down there. So he is going to kill them. I think that they, oh, buddy, once I get, once I get these poison darts out of the wall, they're going. They are going straight into a millennials, but, Whoa. So first, it's just two targets, silverfish and millennials. I mean, I can see how millennials as a, you know, as a generation sometimes can be annoying,

but I think that you might be going a little far. It's two, you know what they say like it's two hits me hitting you hitting the ground? This is two misses. Me missing the silverfish and then millennials' parents missing them. Jesus Christ. Is that, are you sure you want to say that on your podcast? Well, I was under the impression that we were not going to release this one because of the danger. We can kind of chill out at this point.

Yeah. So the Silverfish and the millennials are the two groups you do not want hearing this. I mean, we can just, I don't know, find a frequency that neither of those species are able to hear. Yeah, let's have Matt Apodaca kind of getting the wires and tune that up. Twittle the knobs? Yeah. Do you know Sandler? I've met Adam Sandler, sure.

You comfortable making a call? Yeah, sure we can really like... I feel like you guys really... Close the loop on this night. Adam Sandler was going to walk in here today and you're still sort of reeling and disappointed. I don't move through life expecting something like that to be... You want to make God laugh, make a plan, you know what I mean?

It applies to podcast guests and everything. It seems like this was the expectation you guys had. It's not about expectations. It's about like... It made too much sense. Heowing with him. Him going on severance and like actually the show making sense where it's two different guys and one of them is... Adam Sandler.

Like the goofball and the other one's a little more buttoned up. By the way, you would still be there. I would still be on the show. Yeah. Thank you. That would be great. Yes. Well, I do know him.

So you want me to trade in, like someone that I barely know. Whatever you're comfortable with Adam. Because it seems like you guys want Adam Sandler to... Would that be? I mean, it could be a nice episode, you know. You've had a good time here. You tell him, hey, this was funny. That's separate negotiations we're having with Stiller.

Maybe we just roll that deal over into a Sandler deal. So I'm now cut out of the deal. Do you have a food that you are trying to get... Scott's tots? I mean, that's a great idea. I've never actually thought about. a food that I could put my name on. Tater Tots,

I like Tater Tots. I don't know if I'm passionate enough about them to like sell Tater Tots with my face on the bag. Scott's Tots. I think we used to have a producer who would tell us about the office all the time. Just different

things that had happened in the show, the office. Now is a Michael Scott thing. But I think that's about kids. I think the tots are kids. So if you change both the Scott and the tot. Well, Tater Scots. Tater Scots.

Tater Scott. Did you just define that? Well, we found it, Adam. I mean, we're working together. I actually pointed out a flaw, and so that is a huge part. If you've ever been in a writer's room, it's kind of my thing to be like, I'm bumping on this. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This has been awesome.

You never get to the other thing. You guys keep going. I am going to split. You are really. Yeah, just I don't want to be late. Do you have a, first week of work? Okay. Okay.

Do you Are we allowed to see you? Yeah, sure. Are we allowed to talk about your new, the next thing you're doing with Ackerman, the new kind of music run

you guys are doing? We don't know yet which, what we're going to do. Oh, I was told that you did, okay. What were you told?

I believe it was called jacking my Johnson to Jack Johnson with John's son Jack. Okay, cats out of the bag. So, are you guys? If I could go on to discuss brush fire fairy tales, I mean, you know, I don't want to wedge myself in there. Oh my God, we would love to have.

Jacking your Johnson to Jack Johnson with John's son Jack is the name of the show. That's, that's the name of the show. Who is Jack and John? Jack Johnson with Jack Johnson and Jack's. John's son, Jacks. But who is, who is the John? It's not JFK Jr, right? Is it...

How dare you? He's hot right now. How dare you? No, it's not J.F.K. Junior. Would that be something, though, if you revealed... Oh, but it could be Jack Schlosperg. Was still alive, though. It is Jack Schlosberg.

Oh. Okay. Less exciting than it being JFK Jr. But, you know, maybe at some point we'll actually... Still exciting. Like this! It is exciting, right? Yeah.

Sometimes, yeah, sometimes you have... I don't want to call it an expectation. Sometimes you sort of assume something and what you find out is the truth is even better. It's been so awesome guys. I got a boogie. I'll walk you out. I got a split. I'll walk you out.

Okay. Great. Yeah, great to see. We have some stuff to catch up on and just sort of not damage control. Do you want to hang out or? I don't need to hang out here if you guys are leaving. Say it for a second. When the show is done, we just say bye.

So whenever you're feeling it, you say bye. So I just keep going. If you want to plug anything, I mean, you gotta. Okay. How about the horror movie? There's a number. Do we even say the name?

You didn't even say the name. Yeah. Okay, Hocum comes out May 1st in theaters everywhere. Thanks, you guys. Thanks. Bye. Okay, bye. Is this my show now?

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