Hollywood Handbook - An Ad for Peecast with Scott and Wiger

Episode Date: December 6, 2018

The Boys do an ad with Scott and Wiger about some sneaky Peecast news.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. Okay, see you, man. Yeah, I'm going to take off. Okay, I was just about to take off. Who should take off first? I mean, I can go. I hope we don't do one of those things where we both try to fit through the door and we're, like, stuck in a door frame together. That would be so embarrassing. Yeah, that would be. Now that I got you, though, I do want to say how excited I am that the Doughboys are going to be on the pcast blast

very excited did you hear someone say well well well if were you while you were i thought that was you no that wasn't me i thought you were a son of a bitch you were saying what you were gonna say if we got trapped in that doorway together well no well well son of a bitch that's not you saying that right now that's not me no like look at my mouth i'm not saying well i know but you're a master ventriloquist as well. You do that in the writer's room all the time. I have that skill, but I'm not using it right now. You're not using your skill?

No. The sick genius that only a madman possesses. The light is off in our corner. Let me flick this on. Well, well, well. The Hollywood handbook men. Sean and Hayes. The men.

You sick, genius sons of bitches. Who are you talking to? Are you talking to each other? I wish. I would love to talk to Hayes. You can't. I mean, you can. No, instead we gotta talk to this sick fuck.

Look at you, you old sick son of a bitch. Are you talking to Nick or are you talking to me? You had me. You had me. You had me. All this time acting like you don't want us to be in the PCAST blast. I played right into your hand. We did a whole episode about how we weren't allowed in the PCAST blast. I'm sicking our fans on you, acting like we don't want them to yell at you online.

I don't want you in the PCAST blast. I don't want you on it. You're not on it. Oh, then why are we in the show? Yeah. What do you mean you're in the show? You don't want you in the PCAST blast. I don't want you on it. You're not on it. Oh, then why are we in the show? Yeah. What do you mean you're in the show?

You don't want us to be on there so much. Why are we in it now? You're not in the show. I booked the entire show and you're not in it. You don't want it so bad we're in it?

Okay, Scott. You're not in the show. I'll tell you who's in the show. You can give up the ruse. I'll tell you who's in the show. Comedy Bang Bang, the Andy Daly pilot podcast project.

Makes sense. Huge show. Off Book, the improvised musical podcast. Makes sense. Huge show. Off Book, the Improvised Musical Podcast. Rising Stars. Very funny. Already probably bigger than we are. We've been doing it for five years. Throwing Shade, very popular.

Tours the Country. Yeah, and relevant. Teacher's Lounge, you know, maybe not a smash hit. But objectively the funniest show out there. And then, of course, Doughboys, who... Scott, I have something I need to tell you. Is it... Can I guess? Yeah, you can guess.

Is it how much you care about me? That's part of it. Oh, good! Start with that. I'd like to hear that. Is it how much money the Doughboys Patreon makes? That was not going to be part of it. I'd like to hear that as well. Because when I hear Weiger say,

I have something to tell you, that's what I expect to hear. What else is he thinking about? I kind of have a one-track mind, and that's raising the amount we make on Patreon. No, Scott, because I care about you and the PCAST blast so much. Sorry, raising the amount from what?

What's the number now? We're making good money. Has it dipped ever? First's the number now? We're making good money. Has it dipped ever? First of the month, it goes down a little bit. Is it on track? Is it going up, up, up? Yeah, it's kind of like a little... There are little hitches where it goes down, but it's mostly like a roller coaster that's on the rise.

Are you on automatic renewal? I mean, I personally am. No, but I mean, is everyone who joins it on automatic renewal? I mean, I personally am. No, but I mean, is everyone who joins it on automatic renewal? Yeah, when you join Patreon. Okay, that's kind of a, yeah. A chunk of our audience

probably forgot about it. Forgot that you're doing it. Yeah, doesn't even listen. They have a $5 recurring charge for something. And they're like, yeah, they don't even know what it is.

It shows up as something else on the bill. Yeah, is it built as something else? It's like Entertainment Media Inc. Yeah, Gentleman's Assurances Incorporated. Ours actually just shows up as Netflix subscription.

Oh, okay. See, that's... Yeah, it's a little deceptive. LOL. No way. He just LOL'd. Try it again. LOL.

He did it again. Wow. Anyway, well, that's great to hear that you're making good money Yeah, we're doing well, but here's the thing Because I care about you and the PCAST blast so much Yeah, it's going to be so fun I cannot wait to see what you guys have planned Mitch and I had a conversation

And we were like That's fun Yeah, it was fun It was not for the podcast Oh, it was off mic? It was off mic I would love to be a fly on the wall for that conversation Damn, I wish I did that with my podcast co-host.

I'd love to talk to his. Off mic? Yeah. Imagine the shit we'd get into. Dude, we'd be chopping it up, man. That's trouble. But so we were like, well, how can we squash this beef that is out there? Is that part of your show?

You squash beef? We eat beef and we squash beef. Okay. And we realized the way we could do that. What beef are you hoping to squash? What are you talking about? They eat beef squash. This beef that's going on with you and the handbook men. Well, let me tell you, it's kind of

a one-sided beef. They're very, very upset at me and I don't care about it at all. Okay. I just don't care to engage with them on this kind of thing. Yeah. Yeah. It's one big side of beef. For being the sickest son of a bitch at town.

Yeah. I think I said once, and I truly mean it, Hollywood Handbook has the most annoying fan base in podcasting. And I don't know what yours is like. Our fan base didn't even hear that. So they didn't even notice it. They didn't even notice it? Nobody even noticed it.

There was like a buzzing of a freaking mosquito to them and they squashed it and they never paid attention to it or reacted to it at all okay no when it comes to whether or not our fan base has listened to you let's just say it's been a while okay well i really they don't even know what that is no they don't know they don't know i really wouldn't know because i have a block list for whomever follows you guys. I've muted. Oh, wow. But I am upset with you. I am upset that I didn't see that you were ten steps ahead of me the whole damn time, you chess master.

I really don't know what you're talking about. What are you saying? I hate being a pawn on Scott Aukerman's board. This fucker led me right to the promised land, man. And now I can do whatever I want. I don't know. What promised land? What board? The other end of the...

When the... Chess heaven. The chess board. All right, guys. I'm done with your ridiculousness. Anyway, Nick, I'll see you at the PCAST. I'll say our... It's great.

Our guests are Sean and Hayes. The Doughboy's guests are Sean and Hayes. The Hollywood Handbook is going to be at the PCAST. As if you didn't know. Yes. What? Dale, And yes What? It's true In my home? Where my children sleep?

The PCAST blast is going to be at your home What's happening in your home? It's a metaphor This is my house Are you staying at the A? Is that where you live now? Yeah The pool is such a scene I you staying at the A? Is that where you live now? Yeah, it's nice. Yeah.

The pool is such a scene. I could really see Scott Augerman posting up. I need a little distance between the relationship between me and Cool Up, and then I can kind of fully activate into... Anyway, no, this is terrible! Into Hot Scott. Look, you guys know that I don't like you guys, and anytime we get down into a parking lot, I let you have it. And I'm a different guy, and I am just ripping into you guys,

and I'm the meanest, meanest person. So to have you, Nick, a person that I've always respected and admired, to go behind my back like this it hurts i'd admire about nick i mean i like him but i mean okay it was a little strong totally nice attributes that nice guy funny guy yeah yeah i mean he's had a great relationship with his wife for a while that's it's going pretty well before that that's great yeah i mean i'm also staying at the ace hotel now oh you are oh yeah i'm also staying at the Ace Hotel now. Oh, you are?

Oh, I gotta see you at the pool. Well, yeah, we'll be there. But yeah, we got the Hollywood handbook guys. They're gonna come. I don't know. Yeah, he knows that. It was his whole plan. Did I not put it?

And now we're doing an ad for it? Oh my gosh. On our show? Did I not put a clause into it? If somebody cut these strings off me, the puppet master Geppetto Ackerman over here is making me dance his dance. Did I not put a clause into the contract next to the exclusivity clause? Let me actually...

I have the contract in front of me. Let me go ahead and flip this. Okay. Flip through this. Okay, exclusivity clause. Yeah, we can't put this on the Doughboys double Patreon for six months. We discussed that. That was the thing we agreed to.

Oh, here we go. This is going to be a double? we this is gonna be a doubt yeah we're gonna pay one day we make it onto the main fee um but you think that'll bump the numbers up i promise you we're hoping it we're hoping it'll we'll probably release it just after the first of the month what's mitch do with all his money now i can't even imagine him with money uh he doesn't look like he has any. Okay, I got the contract, the relevant section of the contract here. It says, I, Scott Aukerman. Yeah, that sounds like me. Yeah, I, Scott Aukerman. That's something I would say.

Declare that the Doughboys, by writ of signing this contract, agree to have their guests be Sean and Hayes, the Hollywood Handbook guys. You son of a bitch, this was your plan the whole time. That was your plan the whole time? That was his plan the whole time. Well, well, well.

Oh, no. I already have reacted to this already at the very beginning of this, but just hearing you now own up to it. Hearing confirmation, yeah. Oh, shit. Yeah, you guys, I noticed we're playing two-dimensional chess. Wow. And I said, let's add a little thing called a dimension onto this.

And he doesn't walk with a limp anymore. Yeah. God. And his Zippo is cool. Yeah. What? Yeah. He's lighting his Zippo.

Uh-huh. What? Yeah. Smoking his cigarette. Uh-huh. What? Yeah. What?

Kaiser. Wait a sec. This is, and he was parking lot Scott all along. That's right. Parking lot Scott. And we were always in the parking lot. You just been got by parking lot Scott. Sorry, boys.

I'll see you down next to my space. Okay. I mean my parking space. Not my space. Not the website. No. Sure. Yeah.

That hasn't been up For a while No Are bands still on there Like music's on Yeah Yeah exactly But I'll see you down

In the lot boys And I'll see you At the peak ass blast Okay I want it I thought it was A good opportunity for us You thought Well I wanted to do it

You thought you'd do A show for charity That was a HeadGum Podcast