Hollywood Handbook - Dom and The Scuzzman, Our Olympic Rom-Com Friends

Episode Date: July 27, 2021

DOMINIC DIERKES and THE SCUZZMAN return on location from their self-funded film project. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

this is a head gum podcast so it's me and it's um the fbi and the cia and the sheriff's department and the police and the president and the supreme court okay and uh chips yep chips and uh the forest rangers and the federales are with us as well and interpol is there uh and um we are with the oinkster guys and we are knocking on the doors of people who are leeching but not seeding okay and we and we are uh you know it's like it's one of these things where obviously they don't the law enforcement agencies don't like the oinkster guys very much and they don't like me because we're both responsible for some pretty shady

activity but there is an even greater evil which is oinkster's gonna oink like there's going to be uh this pink piggy palace where you can get all of your favorite audio files that's going to exist as long as that's true you have to seed you cannot just leech and even doing the minimum just to hit the limit so that your account doesn't get shut down is not enough in the eyes of myself or the law we find this guy reporting not people that are leeching but not seeding oh or at least not very much so the required ratio do you want to talk about some of the the the content you've been seeding lately yeah sure um i'm seeding uh the entire catalog of one mr ira glass wow that's a very long seed yes and and then and there obviously that is a tree trunk off of which many branches exist uh partly cloudy patriot

is going to be an audio file that you can see okay what is what is that partly cloudy patriot the sarah vow uh essay collection do you know her better from her i know the wordy shipmates is that uh the wordy shipmates was prior and assassins was after but it's that you know uh the it sort of neither here nor there. But yes, some of Jonathan Goldstein's work will be up there. Wiretap and some other. And then, of course, we've got Me Talk Pretty One Day is there. And yes, when you are engulfed in flames. That's my Dave. When people say, I'm going to see Dave.

Yeah. I'm camping out a man i just i got the cooler packed up and i'm hitting the parking lot to tailgate hard before dave i'm gonna be fucking hippie flipping man i'm gonna eat a need a quarter of mushrooms and drop two fucking molly stacks parachute them straight to my gut and i and they go oh shit all right what are you hoping he plays and i'm like i'm hoping he does some stuff from barrel fever you know he's gonna do the elf stuff for sure yeah i go oh yeah gotta do santa land man if he does oh gosh if he does truck buddy trucker buddy about the urine bag that you can tape inside your leg i'd just about die and go to heaven at that point man i'd be ascending

into the rafters hey welcome to hollywood handbook and insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names of the red carpet linebacker always of this industry we call showbiz and it is so nice to see friends so nice to see uh repeat guests that we haven't seen for a little while and catch up with what they are up to these are famous guests on the show and friends of ours they've been on the show before. But they exist off the show as well. Sometimes people, they listen to the show and they hear guests like you guys

and they think that when they turn off their little box or they stop their episode, often before the episode is finished, and they try something else, that you stop you know doing what you do but it's not existing yeah it's not true you're in the world and you're yeah trying to affect a positive change that is actually really helpful for you to let's start with this that like once the show's over that you're still alive you're still out there doing stuff and because that would help i think a lot of our

listeners not be as upset not cry not freak out yeah dom and this guy's man this is yeah i'm sorry i'm dom man yeah man i think the last time we spoke, we were in a different place. You know what I mean? Like mentally, physically, we were in a completely different place. But we definitely exist outside of the pod. That is, I can reassure you. Oh, yeah.

I exist, baby. Maybe a little too much. Yeah, you know what I'm talking about, brother. Yeah, a little too much. Has a lot of sex there's a lot of scuzz man to go around man you know people people can handle it or they can't you know what i'm saying very polarizing outcomes with the scuzz man yeah yeah i'm hot i'm cold i'm up i'm down i'm i'm all around you know talk a little bit about your temperature because you have been you you

were telling us before we started recording that you um are have been breaking out into like a you know a huge sweat and you'll just be like completely drenched and feel like you're burning up and minutes later you will need to put on like a big parka because you're so so cold oh yeah oh yeah it has not it has not been going away for a couple months now uh i will just uh you know get really hot and sweaty uh cough uh i um okay almost that doesn't seem that doesn't seem related at all the car for most people i don't maybe this is just me being hot doesn't make me cough oh i disagree okay i disagree when you get that heat cough that like okay is it hot in here yeah man are you doing it are you doing it right because uh because a lot of people kind of the scuzz man kind of coughs to release

the hot air like it's a way of cooling himself off that's what i realized like almost like a smokestack kind of if it does it's like dogs panting when you know when you see a dog panting and they got their that's them cooling themselves down exactly because dogs don't dogs don't sweat we've we checked they don't sweat in their fur or on their body at all. That's just how they have to cool themselves down. And the Scuzzman's the same way. Well, he does sweat. He's talked a lot about sweating.

He just said a second ago that he's very hot and sweaty. But the way he calls sweat, I don't think is what normal people... It's different. I just think he's unlocked something where it's like, okay, so we see these animals these incredibly intelligent animals the dog who has found a method of cooling themselves down and we go well we sweat so we won't also take advantage of this other thing that exists that we've seen it be effective so like why because you sweat don't you also pant and ultimately cough a lot hard and loud in order

to help cool yourself down quicker and with scuzzman i think we found you know maybe the reason is it's almost too effective because then you do get so cold that you fall asleep yeah yeah that's right i'm i'm asleep a lot a lot of the times like every every waking hour of the day i'm kind of okay don't call them waking hours we've talked about this yeah anything else yeah that's what you just call it that's what you call it waking hours you know you know people they know what i'm saying when you sleep you're up for waking hours and you're just out for the count when you're asleep you're not up you're oh you're asleep well i sleep haze you're gonna go round and round with the scuzz man about this i've tried

i've tried to get him to see this this kind of way of hey hey wake hey saw the bull today and said uh i'll have one order of the horns please uh i mean you just so you're oh yeah for what like just to help to help new listeners, Dom and the Scuzzman have been on the show many times. What I think would actually be helpful is to kind of, like, explain some of the lore behind your appearances on the show. I would actually love to hear Scuzzman recount

just, like, as much of his kind of personal backstory and the the kind of stories that you've told and experience on the show as as you can like i would just love to hear your kind of summary of it and am i seeing a pepsi can behind you as well scuzz man looks like a diet peps Yeah, diet Pepsi. Feel free to talk about that as well. Okay. It's full. Unopened. It does not look cold. He's been saving that Pepsi for a special occasion.

It is getting hot. It is heated up. It was cold earlier. What happened was that I went to a vending machine, and I found out that this expired expired i don't know if you could see right there okay april 2020 and you know me i don't like to drink expired drinks that's the one thing that scuzz man does not like to do okay so this is you do it but you don't like it do it he doesn't like it i do it if i do it if I have to, like if I'm forced to.

But I don't like to do it. For like a radio show or something. Like a radio show, a doctor's appointment, or sometimes people come up to the street, like fans of mine, and they're like, you have to drink this. It's expired. And I have to do it.

But I don't like it. It looked like that can you have actually expired on 4-20-2020. It did, apparently. You've got to drink it, man. Oh, shit. Really? Yeah. Fuck, man.

Could be fun to drink it on the show. Oh, wow. This is an important guy. Peps to him. This is going to be a good episode. You challenged me. So,in him. This is going to be a good episode. He challenged me. So bottoms up. Oh, boy. What a little sip.

And I can hear how thick it is. It sounds thick. It tastes expired. That's for sure. Hey, I'm drinking it, though. Show your listeners, viewers. It's going down. All right.

But yeah, get into your lore i we already have a little bit okay what let's talk about yeah just like some of your some of your backstory all right well yeah well the scuzz man as you I live on the beach. I live in a school bus. The Scuzz Bus. That's right. The Scuzz Bus. You know, writing movies with this guy down here. Making movies. Doing movies.

What else did I do? That's four episodes, I think, worth of lore. Well, there's two big movies we did. Four? Yeah. Four? Damn. Wow. Time flies. I think worth of well there's two big movies we did four damn wow time flies now you're just drinking it recreationally yeah the first sip's always

really important and then after that it just the sips become less more casual put a can of liquid in front of me and I'll start drinking. Okay. I mean, I think it... Dom, maybe you can fill some of this stuff in.

The last time we talked to you was closer to the beginning of the pandemic, which was affecting you in different ways. We had just locked down in the Scuzz bus. We were just on the cusp of shooting what wound up becoming a, uh,

it's an incomplete film. Beach blanket. Bingo romp was what we, and we read a piece, part of the scripts here on the show. And we got some great feedback from you guys. Um, but unfortunately it just didn't wind up kind of coming together the way we

thought pre-production was awesome, but the production kind of process yes i recall that i remember pre-production had gone really successful pre-production everything was teed up like just so we were teed up for success with just a great crew that scuzz man kind of reamed out uh at the wrap party the pre-production wrap party. And so when we went to shoot, there just wasn't the crew, there wasn't the infrastructure, and a lot of the kind of clarity issues that you guys brought to light in the story

were just frankly insurmountable. So we kind of took a step back a little bit and said like, okay, we've written movies, we've kind of conquered that, we have this one setback, maybe we try to figure out where Hollywood's headed instead of like trying to play catch up, you know?

And that's when I realized scuzz man kind of, he has a great investment mind. If you don't mind my saying that scuzz man. No, no, no, please do. I've been making lots of investments,

fucking stock market. Okay. Okay. When investments. Fucking stock market. Okay. When he discovered the stock market, that was like a real lights on. That took him into hyperdrive, yeah, from where he had been obviously already a very good investor, and then the stock market was like pouring gasoline on a roaring flame because that allowed him to invest so much more efficiently and effectively.

The thing I was curious about, Scuzzman, is I know that you... Obviously, COVID created a lot of tragedy, but there also was, as you mentioned to me, a lot of opportunity. Particularly particularly there was a great need for testing and you devised a rapid test. I think you called it a super rapid test because it was even faster than the 10 minute one. And a lot of people who didn't want the nasal option or even the saliva swab, you were willing to stick it up their butt. Yeah. Yeah, I was willing to stick it up their butt because, you know, in a previous life, I have been a nurse, and I am used to administering tests like this.

I don't know if you guys knew that about me, but I was a nurse in a previous life um and uh i um yeah i developed a test because i had covet a bunch like you know yeah you had seven times by the time we saw you you had already had it multiple times yeah when we were recording he was in a little bit of denial about like the last but i mean he definitely we wound up kind of taking one of the regular rapid tests but what better opportunity i mean like it's you know uh obviously you weren't endangering um any sort of like lab rat or anything you you knew that you had it and you were able to test and when that test came back positive you said okay this works

because i know i definitely have it right now yeah and i believe you were able to then get even more involved in the film industry because there were a lot of sets that started using your testing company and it sounds like you were making money hand over fist oh yeah man i was doing the covid protocols and everything and getting all these big big names to get let me fucking stick it up their ass baby and test them for the covid yeah i was raking it in raking it in mission impossible was you i believe you were the person tom cruise was yelling at is this right yeah he was yelling at me because i was taking a little break uh you know a mass break i was taking yeah i was taking a mass break because i can't breathe i needed to i need you know i needed a i needed a moment that's you were wearing

a t-shirt that said that i remember yeah on set i had t-shirts i had shorts and all that stuff yeah i can't breathe shorts i was trying on the booty i was trying i was trying to like you know give them a message and show them what you know what i'm all about well it's i'd be i i've spoken to you a little bit about i don't know how much you want to say, but I know that like when, when you talked to me, you said that you needed a lot of max breaks. Cause it was very hard for you to breathe through the mask,

particularly because you had COVID. Yeah. And so that, you know, that already was making it really hard to breathe. Um, but I suppose Tom is not going to take that as a valid explanation in fact he probably would not want to hear that at all no he did not like that hey he did not like that and

and he was like how how do you how do you have covet too and i was like hey man i feel like tom was in the room did tom just come in i mean honestly scuzzman the mimicry i've been working on that one mr everybody said that to him and tom said that to him in front of everyone he said how do you have it too and i was just like mortifying for scuzzman what was that was that in reference to like that he also had why did he say two in addition to having his mask off and being a lazy tester yeah yeah yeah oh i see he's like you're testing and you have it too like that was what he was saying but he even admitted afterward that he phrased it awkwardly like he apologized everybody yeah he said i'm usually so articulate and i think that he actually wanted that edited out of the sound clip that was

released of him yelling at scuzz man because it it really didn't fit with um some of the other points that he made i have the recording i have the original and i'm thinking about releasing it again to make money off of that see well you know wow i'm just i just i just have so many income streams right now it's just like it's it's all coming up scuzz uh i'll tell you that much but i've heard the original recording and i i actually would advise against you releasing it because the the stuff that you're interjecting in between tom where you're saying like why are you so stressed out man the test doesn't even fucking work anyway let me put it up your butt

yeah yeah i'll stick it up your butt it's gonna turn green or blue and they honestly look kind of the same i just kind of feel it out whether i think the person is positive and then i and then i hit them with the stamp if they are and i and i and you also were talking about stuff that was just unrelated like opinions opinions you had that I don't think it would be to your benefit to share that unedited audio. Oh, no, I disagree, man. I disagree. I mean, people got to hear what I got to say. You know, people got to.

I'm sorry. Sorry, my old lady's coming in. Skuzz, man. This is another one, Skuzz, man? Yeah. Hey, man. You you know that's uh that's is that her and they just keep coming yeah yeah that's her she's a dog yeah i'm telling you when you use the word old when you say old lady yeah it can it leads people to believe that it's it's

a woman this happens at restaurants this happens all you hold on, my old lady's parking the car. And then the dog comes in and everyone's shocked. Yeah, hands you its own leash and says, let's have some steak. I mean, in barks it says that. Yeah. Yeah. No, she doesn't speak English.

Not yet. But she does drive a car. The only financial setback I feel like you've had scuzz man was when because with all those tests right like everything that he was kind of putting up people's butts he was sending that off to a lab and the lab we had never really corresponded with before that like their kind of first knowledge that scuzz man existed was when these these they started showing up started showing up and they all were marked urgent they were all marked super rapid need immediately friends of tom and and they they obviously were like we're not going to test this and they had a whole it was a whole kind of drawn out thing tom cruise yeah tom cruise yes sorry friends of tom

cruise so that that case was thrown out so the lab yeah the the lab uh didn't exactly know how to handle it that must have been disconcerting for them also at a time when most labs were overworked already um they got a sounds like a huge crate of butt swabs every day. Yeah. From the scuzz man. You figured this out, that these tests were basically like 100% effective because if you are administering them and you're just like in proximity of the person getting the test,

then they have COVID. Yeah. It raises the person getting the test, then they have COVID. It raises the chances of the test being accurate to have the test happen around the Scuzzman who has COVID because the test will be positive. Did you have one negative test that you gave, Scuzzman? Yeah, we had one negative test. But that was the one that you had spilled an entire Diet Pepsi on. Is that right?

I believe so. I believe so. I believe so. You know, the Diet Pepsi, it just turns the test around and it becomes negative. Well, Jeff, I mean. And that led you to believe that Diet Pepsi cured COVID. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah. Which led him to it. And he Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Which led him to, and he invested heavily in that stock. Like that's what led him to go really hard into Diet Pepsi. Cause he said, when other people figure this shit out, like we are going to make some serious money.

And so he bought like what? I think a million shares of Diet Pepsi. A million shares of Diet Pepsi I have. Okay. Just Diet Pepsi, not in the Pepsi-Cola company. No. I called them up and I said, make sure this is just for the diet.

And they were able to fulfill that order. They could do that. Okay. Yeah, well, when you got the connections that I got, you know, it's pretty easy. Talk about some of your connections. Well, in a previous life, I worked on Wall Street. You don't know that.

Okay, but you just found out about... This is after you were a nurse. You just found out about the stock market. In this life, in a previous life. Okay, okay. Like, before he was a nurse right before you before your life nurse life so this is all literal you're saying that in actual like previous lives that you've had not like previous careers yeah have you heard of like the past life regression and all that

yeah but also i'm like i've done that a lot okay you know what I mean? I've had live after live after live. Scuzzman had me hypnotize him. Yeah, he's done so many. He's had live after live. Scuzzman had me hypnotize him and regress into his past lives. He said, all right, I'm going to close my eyes. Now hypnotize me.

I want to go back to my nurse life. Then I would hypnotize him. He would do that. He would be a nurse, and we then i would kind of hypnotize him he would do that and he would be a nurse and we kind of have a little chat and then we do we do that what did you learn like what like what time period was he was he a nurse and i mean i'm just curious about just seems like the least interesting detail of these conversations just that he was a nurse he was just a mediocre nurse and i think the mid-70s so that is actually the most interesting part he's just a just a nurse who kind of did it for like four years

and then retired and kind of moved on to something else wow but yeah the conversation sounds like it was very boring yeah i i mean i remember talking to you guys around this time and it was a little interesting that you were a nurse who ate cigarettes like that was your favorite meal was like a pack of cigarettes and you would eat it with a fork and a diagnosis okay yeah i could see why that wouldn't come up right away well you have like a questionnaire where it's like what's your favorite color like what kind of music do you like and then one of that question was like you know uh dream dinner cigarette dream dinner was one of the questions dream dinner yes fork knife plate of cigarettes

is what he's what the nurse said i think it was dream dinner party so it was sort of that like any three people living or dead but this guzman as the nurse just took it to mean like what would you be eating and the answer was cigarettes fork and knife included smoked cigarette they have to be smoked they have to be pre-smoked okay i have to be pretty he loves that smoky flavor yeah yeah oh oh it's taking me back oh take me back baby to the 70s when i was eating those cigarettes okay were you alive in like in my past life no i but like we're in this current life weren't you alive did some of these lives like overlap we've done the time we've done the timeline yeah there's a one of his past lives overlaps by like three years with his current life okay he had another past life that's starting i think next week and working on wall street it

sounds a little like that was like maybe during like the 80s oh yeah so you so your current life was happening during all of these past lives as well. Right, right, right. Yeah, Scuzzman 2 was working in Wall Street and then Scuzzman 3. Your past life is named Scuzzman 2? Yeah. Yeah, that's what I was named scuzzman too scuzzman too money never sleeps right that's what you said your full name was wow yes yeah i was doing a lot of cocaine on those days and making money on wall street on those days okay yeah

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your financial situation has kind of changed do you want to talk about any new projects that you all are working at like as writing partners that's what we've tended to kind of get into in the past with the two of you what's nice is that with the money scuzzman is kind of accumulated we're able to self fund right so this whole

process with the studios and notes and trying to make our vision palatable to other people or explain it is just kind of over i mean the scuzz man is kind of like what the way the way it works now is we pitch it to ourselves and then scuzz man goes uh green light and then he flips on this this light that he thinks is green uh but i don't think okay i don't think it's like it's because of his sunglasses right it kind of makes certain things look green

through the shades they look green baby i mean i gotta i gotta have the shades making me see everything green you know in order to get so all all the traffic lights look green okay walks around he goes green light green light he's excited yeah well i guess it's good that you have a fear in a relationship with someone who could drive yeah like in those situations yeah yeah i've gotten a lot of although they also i guess dogs are specifically red green yeah his old he's got the same problem okay you also had something you have in common so that's nice there was also a bit of a windfall when you sued Matthew McConaughey over his

memoir title, right? Because Green Lights, you owned that. Yeah. I sued the pants off of that guy. Yeah, and the shirt off him. He never wears one. Never. Yeah.

Thank the Scuzzman for that, right? I getuzzman for that. Right. I get no thanks for that. Scuzzman is not going to be the next governor of Texas. Scuzzman is going to make sure that that doesn't happen. Yeah. I'm going I'm going to Texas and I'm going to stop him and I'm going to I might run a campaign against him. You know, in my past life, I was a i was a governor as well okay campaign

runners any specific governor like they're all like i just sort of well known they must all be on like wikipedia okay when we did the past life regression he wouldn't say what state he was cagey he goes out my people didn't elect me to rat them out, is what he said. Oh, wow. I don't know how he'll be ratting them out, just to say what state they're from. What state you're currently the governor of. Can I ask, do you know, as Dom is talking to you in your past life regression, are they just kind of going through their day in the 80s or whatever, that suddenly Dom is talking to them from the future like how does that work

like could that just like happen to could that happen to any of us oh of course i don't know dom's gotta do it you know i guess i'm talking to dom right now yeah yeah okay that's it's only an interruption. It's an interruption. Like the first kind of five minutes of the past life regression is calming them down. It's calming. Either Scuzzman 3, 4, 2, Scuzzman Prime, whatever it is that we, whichever Scuzzman it is we're talking to, and just kind of being like, it's okay. I know you're not in the elevator anymore. You're here with me.

And if he gets too scared, he'll kind of say time out and and then we'll kind of take a time out and then he'll be or he'll be like don't ask me that or you know stuff okay but once they find out that what i mean that really you you just are curious about this stuff that it wasn't even for like any anything that important it sounds like i wish i had something more urgent to kind of ask them about or convey to them you're asking you really just a check-in pulling them out of their present day life to ask them about their dream dinner party for example yeah i'm asking them my favorite color basically yeah wow favorite color should be off the questionnaire i've said this because

it never really gets the all versions of scuzz man that's one thing they have in common is they all like the same color it is green okay it is green but with this is what i put it your sunglasses are not actually green i mean i know you don't know that but they but they are they're like kind of bluish green, but no one would look at that and say that's green. I've been told that they don't look green, but I see green out of them. Okay. But with this, anyway,

you were asking about future projects we have, and with this kind of nest egg, the Scuzzman as greenlit, our latest project, which is a little more high concept kind of in execution uh it's a location-based movie like we want to do a kind of last movie we did was all we wanted to do was all at the beach and we still kind of like this idea and so uh this year we're making a movie at the tokyo olympics uh we have a whole story mapped out you both look like you're in hotel rooms possibly uh

scuzz bands looks a little more upscale are you in tokyo currently uh that's right oh yeah you're big time majorly in tokyo and i don't want to get into too much of the specifics of it because getting into the olympic village itself to film is no easy feat especially you know and so we have to a lot of the resources the money has gone into just kind of getting in the door so to speak okay so this uh these olympics from what i understand are there there are no audience members allowed because of rising COVID cases. It's like a total disaster. So I would think that more than usual, the presence of the two of you just showing up would kind of stand out. Also, I wanted to point out that this that maybe you know this that this has

been done before nick kroll made a movie at the winter olympics in 2018 that came out last year that was sold as the first movie ever made at the olympic village it was called olympic dreams so is this are you gonna sell this as this the movie ever? Yeah, I think you say it's the second one. You say, hey, you've tried the rest. Now try the best. We're not the first to do it, but we have improved on the formula. I'm curious, does it help or hurt

that in a past life, Spellman was Richard Jewell? Because I guess you'd know your way around some of the Olympic stuff. It helps but yeah yeah take a sip of that yeah that pepsi yeah seems to be pepsi sorry coagulating inside your sorry my throat is closing up real bad um yeah it helps man you. You know, every Olympics is the same pretty much. They pretty much have the same maps, you know, the same sort of things. The same maps. The same, you know, you got the same events and the same things.

Like, oh, this is where the village is. You walk a couple steps, you're going to go here, you're going to see swimming. a couple steps you're gonna go here you're gonna see swimming now that if there's one thing that i would not expect richard jewel to say it's that every olympics are the same he well you know i mean shit i mean but that's what the guy thinks though you know that guy okay hey i i'm gonna trust the guy that was there. He was there. And that's you. You were there. This was in the 90s.

That was me. Yeah, this is Scuzzman. This is three, three and a half Scuzzman. Three, three and a half Scuzzman. Did you say he bombed it? Yeah, he bombed it. He was guilty. say he bombed it yeah he bombed it he was guilt so you're you so this was the most confusing past life regression we did this was the one that was the most because it didn't come up until we saw

the movie when we watched the movie together okay then we did a past life regression scuzzman remembered he was richard jewell but then i also don't think he watched the whole movie because i i know it was during his waking hours so he was asleep for some of it and he i don't think he knew the kind of second half um and so yes i mean in the kind of past life regression he was it was like a big confession it was like i did it i fucking hated those olympians like i mean there's a lot of really kind of wow vitriol okay and now you're making a movie at the olympics in tokyo redemption what is i mean it's the summer olympics you like you love the beach is there like is it a beach volleyball like olympic like is that like part of it or are you sort of moving on

from that stuff? Oh, yeah, we're going to have the beach for sure. You're going to have the beach. Okay. We're going to have the beach for sure. But we also have other things, you know, because

I realize that I got to be more well rounded. I can't just stick to the beach we've started to see the beach as a bit of a crutch um okay for scuzz man and we want to kind of branch out but we want to not give a nod to the beach so okay do you want to is like that's already like pretty specific but do you want to like dig into that anymore scuzz man like you're saying that you will have the beach but you'll also have other things are there any more or details oh yeah well we're gonna go into the village right okay we we have that we do have that was said yeah yeah the number one move to

go into the olympic village and we hope people interpret that as many ways as possible okay and then you you guys know what like what they got in tokyo right they got a lot of come on they got a lot of those like zen gardens and stuff okay okay have you seen those yeah that i'm so relieved that they got sand, baby. I can't tell you. Okay, sand. It's not always that. Hey, I got to stick to my brand, and it's sand. You know what I'm saying?

I mean, I'm all... So it's a different kind of sand. So it's not the beach, but it is like a rock garden or something. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You rake the sand. Yeah. Okay Big sand. You rake the sand. Yeah. Okay. Yeah, we rake the sand.

So we're going to check that out. Do they got soccer in the Olympics? Yeah, I think so. Okay. Maybe. I mean, you're at the Olympics. You're the one who told me all Olympics are the same. We saw the national team with the soccer balls yesterday,

Scuzzman, remember? Oh, right. You stole their ball. You stole their ball, and they got pissed. You punted it onto the roof of the gym. Those idiots. There was a gym? Yeah, the Olympic gym.

He kicked the ball on the roof of the gym, and they made us go up and get it down and we were up there there were so many balls come on dude of course there's a gym okay they have to work out no gym at the olympic village well just like the gym is that just i don't know i again i'm not at the olympics i i'm not either but i'm not surprised to hear that there's a gym there. I'm surprised that Scuzzman stole the national team soccer ball and kicked it onto the roof and that then they went up there and got it and there were other balls on top of the gym. That surprises me a little bit.

That makes me wonder if just how many coexistent past lives that there are for Scuzzman. Is it maybe all these different personas kind of doing the same thing like over and over again well he sleeps so much that we've started wondering if that's when he's inhabiting these other lives okay and that's when he kind of like like a movie we just saw recently fight club uh we just kind of dug into that one. And that was like a... Blew our minds a little bit with the kind of structure. Okay.

So you watch a lot of movies together to kind of... Inspire your movies. And you're saying that you actually are using some of the stuff from Fight Club in your movie now. Yeah. A lot of the kind of like anti-materialism is making its way in uh scuzzman's character uh has a huge monologue about just like how he's not his fucking khakis and he's not his shirt either and he's not his hat and he he kind of you are not your all his clothes it's a lot of scuzzman's you are not your sunglasses you are not your bus you know you you are not you are not your sunglasses. You are not your bus. You know, you are not your diet Pepsi.

Yeah. It was like, you know, it made it feel a little more personal to me. I found it, you know, in the pages you sent, I found it a lot more effective even than the Fight Club one. But at its heart, the movie is kind of a romantic comedy, I think, is how we're starting to see it. Okay. It's the Scuzzman and Olympian. The other movie was that as well, the Nick Kroll movie was

that was also the genre. I don't know if that's intentional or not, but that's what it was. No. That one's really not on our radar, I guess. I mean... Yeah, I never even heard of it. I never even heard of that guy. You've never heard of Nick Kroll? Okay.

No. Never heard of him. No no disrespect but scuzzman hasn't it's just not in his orbit okay well discuss man do you want to talk about kind of what like some of what happens in this movie like what just like a basic a basic plot summary would be amazing all right well um basically uh we're going into the village and okay we that with that that we know first of all maybe you should say start of it it's you play multiple characters in this right okay like play multiple characters so uh i play a runner i I'm an Olympic runner. Yeah. I'm an Olympic runner from America.

And I'm trying to find this other runner. I think they're from Japan. Okay. We met at the trials and we just had a blast it's like a friend of his

yeah it was a friend of mine you had a really good time at the trials yeah we were just like we were just like talking about how these losers are running and like we're like we're gonna beat them and it's like no big deal

sorry I can't find them in the olympic village they're lost they're lost so a lot of it is me trying to find them going through tents going through like you know um uh cabins and stuff uh just trying to find my friend sorry to go back on this but you it just surprises me that you've never heard of nick kroll because you do play a bunch of characters and some of one of them is named like buddy the bottle server and one of them is named like gil foo fawn and there was another one that you said this one i'm probably not allowed to do anymore was in the stage directions and it was named like fabiz fabiz or something like i bees yeah so are these and so i don't know i actually thought maybe you were a big fan or something just because like

you're doing this romantic comedy at the Olympic village and you are playing characters that are, whether you know it or not, sound pretty similar to some stuff that he has done. And I, and it's not, it's not what you're describing the movie. Obviously you're talking about this runner who can't find the other runners, which that sounds like a really clean story. Yeah. You know, you have a very clear intention and obstacle. Obviously the intention is to find the runners.

The obstacle is that you can't find them. He doesn't know where they are. Yeah. And it gives you a great opportunity to do sort of your character superpower, which is to run and look for them. But I, you know, you have these other characters as well well and i'm wondering how they fit in and maybe if i could even meet one or two of them because it

seems like uh they are going to be more fresh and more original than i originally you know than i had thought well yeah man plays this one italian oh this one Italian. Oh, go ahead. Sorry. No, no, you go ahead. I was just saying, you play that one Italian runner, the spaghetti long legs. Yeah, spaghetti long legs. Hello, I'm spaghetti long legs. And I'm going around to all the tents and I'm doing this for them.

Because also, I want to entertain them as well. As well as find that other runner that I'm looking for my friend. I have Fabice Fabice. Okay. Fabice Fabice. He. Fabice Fabice. He go like this. He talk, yeah. Hey.

Hey, hey, hey, you. Hey, what you doing in my shoes? Like that. That's Fabice. You might think some of the vocal choices sound similar. What are they doing to his shoes? Yeah. Oh, yeah.

Wait, what's happening in that scene? Okay, yeah, let's back up all these well it's just a bunch of teenagers and they're just like stomping on his shoes and he's like hey don't you do that to my shoes don't you do that to my shoes i do this in the movie yeah it sounds similar to spaghetti long legs little like less of an accent but it's close yeah all these characters have issues with their shoes um bobby bobby bone bobby bonal service okay that's changed since the script i read but i know it was an old draft bobby bonal service yeah what's he what's he saying he's like uh hey get the fuck off my fucking property okay you fucking idiot

and by property he means his shoes from what i recall yeah yeah yeah yeah well you know you can't just like you got to change it up you can't just keep calling his shoes he's, get the fuck off my property. So, yeah, I go to another tent, do that. Yeah, so this fucking guy. So this is, I mean, you're at the Olympics, so it sounds like you've taken the opportunity to play characters of basically every race in order to kind of address some of these tensions. You're hoping for international sales and also, yeah, you

obviously want to kind of settle some of the tensions that have been rising over the past year or two, especially reaching almost a fever pitch. I think it's noble that you believe that this movie could solve it, in your words.

There's one scene where all the Scuzzman's characters are having one kind of big dinner. And they're kind of having this really kind of deep debate about some of this stuff. It's like a nice moment in a kind of otherwise funny, heartfelt, romantic comedy. But then all the various kind of nationalities uh this guy's man is playing really break bread together i think when olympic weightlifter starts flexing his muscles and then his mom starts saying hercules hercules and uh i i thought all these you know different sort of moments of levity that you can find in the midst of a pretty impactful discussion about, you know, some of the harms that have been done. I did like that you also tried to build in, whether from another movie or not, I don't know if they are.

No, that's all original. Okay. Okay, great. I just are. No, that's all original. Okay. Okay, great. I just like... The one... No, go ahead. I was going to say, the one kind of common ground

that they find they all have is that none of them want people stepping on their shoes. You know what I mean? Yeah, sure. That's just kind of like, no matter what race, no matter how much money you have,

no matter how fast you can run, you don't want people stepping on your shoes. Okay. And the fact that he's running in a race as well, it seems like there are opportunities to play. I'm sure that that's territory that you explored. What's the event that the uh the runner for of america is is running in he's um uh the four 400 meter relay oh wow okay and he does every part so he does all four parts of it okay he does all

four parts of it he does the whole relay i didn't i wasn't aware that was allowed but it's pretty impressive that happened and he has and and he does different characters while he's doing it too he falls behind in the relay every time he hands off the baton because he has to do a quick change into the kind of next outfit of the relay guy but he makes up for it because he's got he's got just blistering fast pace to go back go back to the dinner scene as well, because some of the characters in the relay race are also at the dinner scene, and I was curious about the reasoning, just whether...

I don't want to draw a direct comparison, obviously, to Sherman Clump or the Clumps, but I do think of runners as, Olympic runners as lean. And you did describe them all as having like, you know, big fat suits on and being just huge and booking down the track, which is a thrilling visual,

especially if they are as fast as you say. But I just, I'm curious why that is. Well, then it's just much more interesting. I mean, come on. I guess it is more interesting. I've seen skinny runners. Yeah. I haven't seen a Sherman Clump type runner.

Everyone's seen the runner without a lot of weight to carry with their kind of nimble like you know right muscle mass and training but what they haven't seen is what kind of scuzz man's offering which is you know that suit runs and and what does that look like and is it funny so does does the american runner find his friend? Yeah, at the end he finds his friend. Okay. And they make sweet love, you know? Okay, they have sex.

Yeah, they do. Okay. We show it. Yeah. Okay, that happens a lot in movies. You're sort of acting like we're not afraid to show a sexual encounter in this movie like we're straight up gonna do it i think and they might be under covers a little bit but you'll also see some kind of bare butt in there okay and there's it we're just going there because no one knows no we're self-funging

i hope i hope that you do not have when we see the bare butt one of Scuzzman's branded COVID tests sticking out of the butt as like a product placement. Of course. That to me is that's going to take me out of the film. It really dates it

as well I hope. But I guess it dates it to the 2021 Olympics. i guess that's true it's dated to the olympics that it's taking place during yeah it's like a commentary too you know what i mean it's like oh this is what's taking place in this world like let's not let's not forget what we all just went through yeah and you know in what sense is it a commentary well you know like it's a covet test you know no i yeah i know i know like what's being showed on screen but like what is the comment that well they do show it okay is that we show it and we're like hey hey get hey guys i remember i did like

you remember we went through it okay i guess a lot of movies i never thought of it as a comment of movies that take place in the past to say like we remember this i did like the dialogue right before where she says do you have protection and you say oh yeah and you take out a covet test and stick it up your own butt yeah yeah you know and that and that just that's trying to say you know we remember and also i'm getting to make a little bit of cha-ching i'm getting a little make a little money off of it as well you know because you paid your company from the movie budget you you moved that money over that one test and. And we're going to put a QR code up that you can scan and you can order some of the butt tests if you want,

like while you watch the movie, which I think will help drive sales too. Yeah, QR codes all over this movie. Is that something that Nick Kroll did? I don't think so. What else? Language barrier wasn't an issue. You kind of snapped right into that. Oh, could speak japanese pretty well you're fluent in japanese

yeah oh yeah well then sayonara oh oh shit excuse me you know what that means right yo uh that means peace bye normally just bye yeah that Bye. Normally just bye. Yeah, that's right. Yeah, just bye. Yeah. So I guess that does say goodbye. Hollywood Handbook.

That was a Hate Gum podcast.