Hollywood Handbook - Laci Mosley, Our Scams Friends

Episode Date: October 8, 2019

LACI MOSLEY (host of Scam Goddess) helps The Boys with their own scams. This episode is sponsored by Mack Weldon (www.mackweldon.com code: THEBOYS), Untuckit (www.untuckit.com code: THEBOYS), Quip (www.getquip.com/theboys), and Kettlebell Kitchen (www.kettlebellkitchen.com code: THEBOYS).See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. So I'm in the kitchen area, the long table with Naomi. Naomi, it's coming to me. It's coming to me. with Naomi. Naomi. It's coming to me. It's coming to me. Naomi Spanish. It's Naomi Spanish. And we are

inventing dessert pizza. So it's pizza crust, but it's gummy worms and the sauce is jelly and the cheese is Big League Chew. That's good cheese. And we're spreading around.

We're having fun and we're rolling dough and we toss the dough. What's the dough? And we make the pizza. The dough is, of course. What? Laffy toffee. The course... Laffy toffee. What? Laffy toffee. The dough's laffy toffee, and so it's laffy toffee with red vines, jelly, gummy worms, Big League Chew.

And it's going actually pretty well, and we're having just a fun afternoon. Is anyone getting sticky? I'm wearing gloves. Okay. And a big latex suit. Have you ever seen American Horror Story? No. American Horror Story season one, there's a man named Latex Man.

He's in a full body black latex suit and he impregnates Connie Britton. Yeah. Some people get horny about that. He's making people horny. Oh, okay. I am wearing that suit. Have they considered thinking about Margaret Thatcher naked on a cold day?

I'm trying to, yeah, I think they do have to do that in order to become less horny. So nobody's getting sticky. Naomi Spanish, not getting sticky. She may be getting sticky. I can't see too well out of the suit. Okay. But it's a fun weekend. You can't see too well out of the suit. Okay.

But it's a fun weekend. You know, we've broken into the pizza place. And... Hot in a black clay tech suit, right? It's especially next to that pizza oven. Yeah. Anyway, we put it in and it breaks the oven. I'm sorry. Lacey did an Instagram story.

Lacey... I thought story. Lacey. I thought I wasn't supposed to be here right now. While we were talking and Sean was so completely derailed. He looked directly into my camera. I'm so sorry. And meanwhile, I'm just like looking straight ahead. I'm like not even noticing that there's an Instagram story happening. Right.

Yeah. Being very cool. I'm so sorry. You handled it really well. My reaction was, and this is why I don't do as much on camera anymore. It was a lot of that when he was acting. And he was done less on camera.

When the camera turns on, he's supposed to be talking, he's like, hey. He's like, why is someone filming me? Yes. Sorry, are you filming this? I would say often in the middle of a scene. But the scenes were like really, really great.

The scenes were going so good. I thought they were going really well. Yeah, what was some of them? Some of the scenes? Yeah. Hang on. I'll do. Well, you have to do the lines.

I'm usually. Hey, welcome to Hollywood Handbook. Oh, not that. Something else. Oh, I have to be the one who's talking. And the scenes, usually someone else is talking. Right. And they are going really well.

So it's not you. So you're interrupting their scene. To say, I'm sorry, are you filming this? This is a private conversation. It's Hollywood Handbook. Hollywood Handbook. Insider's Guide to Kicking Butt and Dropping Names. The red carpet linebacker always in this industry we call showbiz.

Every time we welcome a new member to this great big family that we have that is called Earwolf, that is so precious to us and that I would absolutely die for any person in this building. I would lay down on the railroad tracks and get run over to death in order to save June Diane Rayfield. Oh, just specific people, not just like the brand of Earwolf? Oh, certainly Earwolf.

If we have to go to war with another podcast studio, will you? Even former members, Engineer Frank, anyone who has ever passed through the storied halls of Earwolf. Even the squires who are betrayed betrayers

of this bread yeah I too would like unplug some headphones and like choke someone to death in the name of Earwolf you would murder for

Earwolf's good name murder for Earwolf absolutely and with like Earwolf property because I feel like that makes it even more special you use Earwolf property

as a weapon to kill yeah like it's mostly like headphones um chips pretty much all it is not even that lately it's like that's true it's been low when you're here your family it's earwolf and it's my only real family but But blood in and blood out also. Oh, yes. You don't get to leave. The Sklars left a pound of flesh on Scott Aukerman's floor. Weirdly, the pound, you could just kind of tell looking at the pound that it was like three quarters Jason.

I know. And one quarter me. Well, his has glasses. Yes, his little pal had a little glasses part. Lacey, welcome so much and have such a good time and always have fun. Thank you so much. And never forget to just be nice. It's been, for us, 10 years on Earwolf and it hasn't gotten stale.

It's still walking in. I get that same rush, that adrenaline, those little goose pimples up my arms, you know, that you get that tingling of like, oh, there's creativity happening in these halls. And I just want to put

like the one like sort of early issue behind us, which is when you walk into Earwolf, there are shows on the wall. Oh, yes. Let's just get this out of the way. There are shows on the wall. There are these big posters that say, these are the shows we make here at Earwolf. Wow. And they've been adding a lot of new shows, but for a long time, Hollywood Handbook was still on the wall and that was so nice.

And then it did get moved to behind the cold brew machine. Got behind the refrigerator, yes. And so it was there. And I kind of liked that. It was like, oh, we're sort of the secret little show. Like you got to be a real fan to find our show, which is true. And I would look at that and say,

okay, we are behind the cold brew machine, but how did this get made as an on the wall at all? So that, I mean, that's like great for us. And I thought only I'm noticing this, but How Did This Get Made isn't on the wall at all. That's great for us. I thought only I'm noticing this, but someone else noticed, certainly not the people from How Did This Get Made who haven't been inside this studio in about eight years because they are double dipping and only do live shows.

But, someone noticed, whether it was an intern, a producer Kevin type, whether it was an intern a producer kevin type um whether it was uh i don't know who else would have noticed maybe it could have been tugboat it could have been the cold brew like dispenser like replacer man hey wait a minute where's zooks and so we now are gonna have my zooks technically on the wall but our sign is leaning against

the wall behind the how did this get made sign and in our old spot is the scam goddess that's right and she has perpetrated the ultimate scam and it is an honor to be scammed off the wall

I got scammed right out of the building by the goddess I'm so sorry I did I somehow scammed my way into getting your spot and I'm so sorry about that I will tell you though how I was told that this came about was you guys are so popular and everyone loves you so

much that you don't even need a sign and my show is new and so people are learning about it and so they were like we gotta put the sign up cause she needs it. Never scam a scammer that's rule number one of scam goddessing you should know this by now you can't scam me like this

I was really told that these are facts, scammers know that the best lie is the truth and this is really what I was told, I'm not even lying. As I walk, let me just paint, I'm doing this sort of a role-playing adventure for people. So I walk in, I turn to the right,

no Hollywood handbook, Scam Goddess there. I turn to the left, I see a reception desk with some merchandise underneath. On top of that desk is another big photo of you that says Scam Goddess. And it says, congrats Scam Goddess team on a successful show launch It's been a long time since we launched our

show but I do not remember a sign like that. We didn't get it but you know who else didn't get it was Conan. Anyone else Okay yeah well Conan is called the inventor of podcasts by Variety Magazine so I think he's good They famously biffed the launch of that. The launch was fucked up.

Kevin blew the launch. Specifically Kevin. Kevin, yes. He left our show to run that and then immediately it exploded on the launch. Kevin tripped

and spilled the podcast right before the launch. It spilled everywhere. I find this so hard to believe because Conan on Brian, like I feel like he, when he launches like a dookie, it's like a success. And that is what he does.

Like when he leaves the bathroom, people are clapping. Like, oh my God, Conan, that shit. I mean, I know you shit every day, but that one. He launches that shit. So good. You know what I mean? It's impossible to biff it when you're Conan. So I'm trying to get to that level.

Well, that's good. i've never seen that sign before for anything congrats on a successful lunch i wonder what made it so successful it seems like it probably just got uploaded like all the other podcasts um yeah that's true it did get uploaded just like all the other podcasts um I heard some links broke. Okay. Yeah, from clicking, which was pretty tight. But also I was like, fix the links. I need more people to click them. People clicked it so hard that it broke.

Soft link break the chain. Just physical clicking broke the links. So I was like, Earwolf, please fix these links. But yeah, I personally, I don't know if I put those signs up there I wasn't involved you don't know if you did I didn't physically put them up there but I appreciate them being there and there was also two signs when I came in there was only

one sign and I was like where's the other sign and then it was behind so see I also I too have had the experience of being put behind another sign yes my sign was put behind my own sign but still i had two signs and i needed well three okay but yeah so what it means to me honestly is that i should be very frightened because whoever's making all these signs is even more scared of you

than they are of us and we know that all the Earwolf employees are scared of us. We have obviously punished your Joshes. One by one. Your Collins. So many Joshes and Collins. You know, they have a support group. There's a specific Josh one and also a specific Collins support group.

There's a lot of cold brew and there's a lot of crying. That might be related. Collins a lot of cold brew and there's a lot of crying. That might be related. Colin's too much cold brew. I will say I feel like I stepped into an ambush. I will say I feel like Mona Scott Young is producing this show. If you don't know who

Mona Scott Young is, she produces Love and Hip Hop. She produces any show about people who are not actually employed anymore throwing drinks at each other. So if you've seen any show where alcohol has been thrown in anybody's face, there's a chance Mona Scott Young is behind it. And it's a trap.

And they say, this will not happen to you and you will be dry on this show. They say that. They say that. And then the producers go, look, we pay you by the scenes. So if you don't start throwing some drinks, I mean, I don't know what to tell you. Did she produce the wine down? She did not produce the wine down. Are they throwing drinks on the wine down?

I don't know. I know there's drinks involved. That's new. Toss them back a couple. Yeah, they toss them back into their throat. Cold glasses of wine. Throw them straight to the uvula. But I came in.

I mean, I feel like this is like also Andy Cohen could be producing this. I came in. I thought we were going to, you know, like fellowship with one another. And I immediately came into this like heat from you guys. I didn't move the sign. Can I say what you walked into? You walked into facts. Wow. The facts. Wow.

The facts. You guys can't hear it, but he just threw a drink at me. I'm wet. You need another one, Mona? Mona's here in the corner handing shots. You need another one?

Do you have an engineer that does every one of your shows? And who's your producer here? What are we working with? So my producer's Cody Ziegler. Yes, okay. Heard good things. Heard very good things.

That could work. Passionate about his shows. I see him posting about them online. Yeah, he truly does. Really gets behind the show. Chef Kevin, you ever see anybody do anything like that? Get on that mic, Kev. Hey guys, Chef Kevin here.

Yes, I do post. I'm a proud parent. I called you Producer Kevin earlier. I forgot your name. Okay, what's the engineer situation? Rotating or you have like a personal catcher? You got a main one. I think it's rotating.

You have never even looked over there have you ever met this guy there's only Cody in my sessions have you met this guy before no he's the head engineer oh wait

have we we have to improv for humans right holy shit yeah but you also have to realize when I go to

improv for humans I'm in a different head space I'm obviously you're in the best room we're all like former UCB I probably should be

but like Besser's like my like you know uncle godfather when I go in there he like does it's only him

nobody else but I just feel like I go in and I'm like I gotta look professional don't look too much in the eyes like for your uncle did I come with my comedy

ready you have to dress up for your uncle it's like when you see Uncle Godfather. Now you must be dressed up. Your Uncle Godfather's coming over, so be on your best behavior.

I am. And so I feel like I don't remember a lot because I black out. It's like a comedy blackout where I'm like, I don't know. It'll be funny. Yeah. So Cody does the engineering and the producing. It would seem that way.

If I'm sitting in this room and I'm only doing one of those things, I would try to pick up the other one really soon. If I were Brett, I would learn how to send a email. If I were Kevin, I would learn how to move a computer mouse. If I'm Brett, I would learn how to send a email. And if I were Kevin, I would learn how to move a computer mouse. If I'm Brett, I would start rehearsing these words. Hannah reached out to them.

I would memorize that sentence as quickly as possible. That's the key to producing. Yeah, because that's the last thing you hear about most guests. If you say, hey, can we get this person? What you'll hear is from your producer, Hannah reached out to them. Lacey, we do want to do some scams. So people come on your show and they're doing scams. Who's come on the show?

Who's scamming on there? So, of course, Paula Tompkins has come on the show. Nicole Byers has come on the show. Who's scamming on there? Of course, Paula F. Tompkins has come on the show. Nicole Byers has come on the show. I love Jamie Loftus. She's been on the show. Lauren Lapkus and I met on a scam. I love them both. I love them both.

You met Lauren out on a scam. I didn't know if you know Jamie, so maybe I put more emphasis on that. You love Jamie Loftus. It is the person we haven't had. Don't try to do drama to me, okay? They're trying to do drama to me right now. I'm trying to do facts. Please don't tell on us.

I am going to tell. I'm going to tell everyone that I walked into the room and I was ambushed. Excuse me. You don't tell on me on my own show. Brett, I'm using my one edit per episode do you have this role with your engineer you get one edit oh are you kidding me no i edit i edit

down i'll come in on edits and like i remember those things sitting in and i've heard that you can give us some of your extra ones but it is allowed i've heard that I'll get more lacks, but I'm like insane right now. We have rollover edits. We have a couple saved up from episodes where we just actually fucking nailed it. Edit credits. I've had to like have people edit things out because I'm like, oh, that's like my mom's business. Problematic. No, it's just like my mom's personal business.

I was like, I shouldn't do that because I used to do that on podcasts. And I'd be like, yeah, this is fucking who gives a fuck like it's a podcast maybe some people here and your mom would call you well not only my mom would call me some articles started like surfacing on the internet where people were like doing deep dives on me and were listening to podcasts and we're like she just came out as a bisexual and I was like okay look us too we have our articles too yeah people are writing articles about us as well I believe that oh my god I relate because we get articles

written about us there was one in LA Weekly in 2011 and they're actually working on another one I did not mean that as a weird brag I just meant like I don't want my mom to be like you know a casualty of like

my podcast narcissism you're saying your mom just came out as bisexual your mom wow and we've got the scoop article writers article writers generic article writers get to typing. So these scams, you're selling dangerous goods? No, I don't like talk about my scams. You don't talk about them. The show is not talking about your scams. The show must be very short. Until my scams are retired, I don't talk about them. Are they life hacks?

No, they're scams. And so I can't like, they're like, you know how you can be like, something's like legal and then something's like legal adjacent and then something's illegal so like these are like legal adjacent things these are like in the cul-de-sac of legal you know what I mean but not quite

like there is no outlet and they aren't actually legal stealing some scams I hear are stealing you're on Floridaida girls yeah on pop yeah uh and you also so i'm just like guessing one of the scams is you also famously have a prop house yeah and so you are demanding that your like character uh always be like carrying very expensive props that like just like oh it so happens that like you only have at your prop house.

Like things like that. That, I truly don't even understand what you just said. And Hayes, I love you. I support you. This partnership means the world to me. I also don't understand what you're saying. Let me explain. And this is, and I,

so maybe this is you not being willing to talk about your scams. It's, it's maybe that you need one example of an expensive prop. Also, I'm like, like a gold rake. Yes. And so you say like,

well, my character obviously like carries around this gold rake and they're like, oh, where are we going to find that? And then they're like, oh, well you call this prop house. You answer your other phone

that's your prop house phone and then people have to buy shit from me I understand now oh that's excellent gold rake that would be really expensive I do do the thing of like you know they'll ask you like oh do you need like soaps in your trailer do you need like blah blah blah and I'm like yeah I do I need

Luxie Tan, Joe Malone I need you to go to Neiman Marcus because I only use $500 face cream. Because I learned that you can do that and they'll buy it for you. Yes. Smart, smart, smart, smart, smart. I try to get as much bought for me as possible when I'm shooting a television show. Can I tell you my scam? What's your scam?

It's happening today as every Saturday. And when I do walk out of this room, I'm going to grab a bag of the popcorn. They don't even have the popcorn anymore. No popcorn today? It's all nasty chips. I'm taking it off today. Do you think they're getting nasty chips? I take a bag of popcorn and I take it home with me.

I feel like nasty chips are a scam. I feel like it's like, look, we have all this food for you, but it's not what you want. Yes not food you want absolutely but it counts as food i think you can't say we didn't give you food i think that's right you stock the fridge you go like there's all the diet sprite and uh like like original lays that you want and you go like i'm not gonna eat that right but it's there they tried to feed you yeah i went to a charity event that i was performing at and this woman had tons of bottles of wine and no wine openers so there was just so much wine and we were all like oh there's wine for us and there was no way to open it was this an episode of the wine down i think they opened the wine i think they opened the wine over there so it was like she did provide wine

like she said but then like you couldn't access it so she took it all home smart here's a scam now you can help me with this I've been working on a self defense strategy class

which is so you're not teaching self defense you're teaching the strategy behind self defense which is So you're not teaching self-defense, you're teaching the strategy The strategy behind self-defense Which is defending yourself Holding a huge magnet that is attracting the gun It is attracting the knife

It is disarming the attacker by it is absorbing the gun and the knife to the magnet. The magnet's huge. This makes sense. It's so big. It is right now a gray Frisbee.

It's like what the actual magnet is. Okay. With no magnetic properties whatsoever. Oh, okay. So it's just literally plastic. As of now, it's in beta. It's in beta. I don't know if you watch Silicon Valley, but it's in beta.

Much like Pied Piper was for, I think, seven seasons. Are you wearing a turtleneck when you talk about it? Because then it's going to seem more like it's in beta. A black turtleneck. A turtleneck a la Mort from the Bazooka Joe comics up to my nose. So that I cannot be identified after the class. Because people are getting shot a lot. Because of the frisbee.

I thought that the frisbee was attracting the whole gun. You're saying the frisbee is just supposed to attract the bullet? And once again, the scam is working too well. What about my belt buckle? People have become so confident that they design a vigilante persona and go out into the night trying to magnetize guns and knives off of various criminals and they are actually yeah getting and this is an issue with the one real magnet that i had was it was kind of attracting my belt buckle and i would have to like pull it back it's attracting the belt buckle. Pull it back. So I am

seeming like I'm walking around very horny. Yeah. Okay. The belt buckle is just kind of going in and out. He's pulling his entire pelvis forward and then thrusting it back away from the magnet and then pulling it forward again. I think you might be in the wrong business. This sounds like a frisbee belt buckle

like, you know, when you want to masturbate but you're in the office. It's not masturbating. I don't know. It sounds like a frisbee belt buckle, like, you know, when you want to masturbate, but you're in the office. It's not masturbating. I don't know. It sounds like masturbation. Maybe like when you're in a cubicle and you want to masturbate, but like people said you can't do that anymore. Right. You get out your frisbee and your belt.

Why is it be thought about that when you want to masturbate in an office? But people said you can't do that anymore. I take out my Frisbee. The solution I found for the real magnet when my belt buckle is being pulled in and out is that I do say I'm celebrating Halloween early and I am being quagmire. So it's me, quagmire.

I'm saying gibbity goo. It's very meta quagmire. That he's talking about how he's quagmire all the time yeah he does actually kind of do that a lot that's very true

well yeah I think you might just be in the wrong market it seems like guns aren't what this is for maybe it's for just like horny businessmen oh who need a way to

like express how horny they are yeah okay horny business are. Okay. Horny businessmen. And where do you find those people? Yeah, where do you find a horny businessman? At any corporate office.

At business, right? Yeah. Just go to the business. At any business. Like the office, honestly. Think about how horny they all were sucking and fucking in that show. I mean, at some point, a lot of it happens off camera. I don't want to turn this into an episode of that place. Think about how horny they all were sucking and fucking in that show. I mean, at some point,

a lot of it happens off camera. I don't want to turn this into an episode of Office Ladies, but another people who bumped us off the wall. They, of course, are in a spot that we never attained up at the top. Not even close. Yeah, see, I'm at the bottom.

So, you know, I've got a slow climb to the spot I actually want. Hollywood Handbook. Eating better is easy with factors. Delicious, ready-to-eat meals. Every fresh, never-frozen meal is chef-crafted, dietitian-approved, ready-to-go in just two minutes. Speaking of ready-to-go in just two minutes, Chef Kevin is here with his new show

the chef kevin factor where he creates fresh never frozen meals now this is different kevin i just want to i just want to establish it's none of this like here's a like a pile of ingredients like this is the meal the meal has to be ready it's not a recipe okay this is the meal you cook the full meal for us now okay yeah you don't just send us a bunch of stuff you had laying around in your cabinet you're actually doing the cooking and there are 35 different options to choose from every week including calorie smart protein plus and keto which is this it's a little bit of all of them okay okay it shouldn't be there are also more than 60 add-ons to help you stay fueled up and feeling good all day long how many add-ons and what are some of them it's one big add-on and it's you on your bed you're

so tired after you eat my meal the promises the meal makes us sleepy. You've been pushing that so much. You're saying that you will be added on to your bed. Yeah. Your bed plus one. That's the opposite of what this is supposed to do. It's supposed to help you stay fueled up and feel good all day long. A lot of these, I know, give you a ton of energy. They have smoothies and things like that. This is wrong.

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That's code theboys50 at factormeals.com slash theboys50 to get 50% off. That's code THEBOYS50 at factormeals.com slash THEBOYS50 to get 50% off. Be a better you in 2024 with Babbel, the science-backed language learning app that actually works. Don't pay hundreds of dollars for private tutors or waste hours on apps that don't really help you speak the language. And the question that I always get, people stop me and they say like, hey, I trust you. I know when you endorse a product, it's something that you really use and care about.

But there's one language that I'm trying to learn, and that's body language. Can Babbel teach me body language? Yes. language so can babble teach me body language yes babble now has visual in-person lessons part of their quick 10-minute lessons that they do for other languages handcrafted by over 200 language experts to help you start speaking a new language in as little as three weeks babble is designed by real people for real conversations and that includes body-based conversations what does it mean when you drop someone off after a nice date and they turn around at the door and they take their little index finger and they kind of like draw it towards them they're pulling it what does that mean does

their whole finger hurt i wonder if they spotted a spider web or something they're trying to pull down the spider down yeah but i've seen this too after a lot of dates and i need i need and have needed something like babble to figure out what the heck is this person doing with their finger because it looks like a it looks like an emergency i know i was supposed to do something or how about those people that stand in the street they're kind of like they've got like almost like police clothes on it may be almost yeah and they're standing in the middle and as i'm driving and i'm cruising they're holding their hand up for like a high five almost.

And they're really aggressively pushing it out. I'm like, am I supposed to drive by a car? Yes. Or just do it out the window as I'm going. That's what I've been doing. Dangerous. Yeah. But some of these very subtle body language cues have escaped me and many listeners.

I'm sure. Babbel's tips and tools are approachable, accessible, rooted in real life situations, which I have all the time, and delivered with conversation-based teaching so you're ready to practice what you've learned in the real world. Studies from Yale, Michigan State University, and others, can't feel good to be others there. Continue to prove Babbel is better. One study found that using Babbel for 15 hours is equivalent to a full semester at college. Babbel has over 60 million subscriptions sold. All of their 14 award-winning language courses

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a picture of your bill and rocket money takes care of the rest they have over 5 million users and have helped save its members an average of 720 a year with over 500 million dollars in canceled subscriptions and that was i mean just to be fully transparent that 500 million was most of that was the the dresses well yeah i mean you're talking about hollywood memorabilia you're talking about like ornate gowns you know in some cases and so that was uh yeah that was costing me a lot a lot a lot stop wasting money on things you don't use cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash the boys that's rocketmoney.com slash the boys rocketmoney.com slash the boys what other scams are you doing on your show why'd you look like that what he just rolled his eyes at

me no no no no no didn't do it didn't please if if rolled my eyes at you, you'd know it. I love you immediately defend him. You weren't looking his direction. You don't know if he rolled his eyes at me. I think I know my friend. I feel really ganged up. A little better than you. We're actually very close friends, and it's not uncommon to feel like a total outsider when you're on this show.

Okay, cool. Yeah. What is a scam that is happening on the show you're interviewing other people about their scams what's another you don't talk about yours so are you asking them about theirs so i talk about scams that are in the zeitgeist and then i talk about very famous scams and then i talk about scammers that i really respect. A famous scam. Yeah. So an example is like the last episode that just aired we talked about wags and how there are people on wags who pretend

to be dogs and then they like will order an appointment for you to walk their dog and then they'll cancel that appointment. They say I'm a dog. Yeah. They say I'm a dog. Yeah I'm a dog like I need to be walked. I'm sort of feeling like I don't have to poop a dog. Yeah. They say, I'm a dog. Yeah, I'm a dog. Like, I need to be walked. I'm sort of feeling like I don't have to poop right now. Right.

But, like, on the trip, probably. Bring bags, you know? Basic stuff. Then, because they have used the app to pretend to be a dog, they can now contact you through the app. And they contact you, and the app doesn't have any way of scrambling between like who's customer support for the app and works for the company and who is just a dog you know needing to get walked so then though what obviously we're talking about a person who owns a dog uh well scammer who probably doesn't own a dog so then they call you after canceling that walk and

they're like hey um we cancel this walk uh it's us from WAGS. We need to give you $10 to reimburse you, but your bank account isn't working. Can you send us the information again? They're scamming the walkers. Yeah, which I think is so fucked because the walkers probably- They're WAG walkers. Yeah. If you're walking dogs on WAG, you probably need the money and don't need to have your bank account wiped out.

Hey, I walked dogs. I mean, no one needs to have their bank account wiped out. Yeah, I needed dogs. I mean, no one needs to have their bank account wiped out. Yeah, I needed the money. That's why I was doing it. Yeah, that's how jobs work. Dude, that was my main reason to do it. It wasn't that you just love dogs and you love walking. Well, I must love dogs, but I absolutely love dogs.

And you could play Frisbee with a dog and also masturbate in public. That was a huge problem. Mistaking the gray Frisbee for the actual metal disc magnet and throwing it for the dog and being just basically hurtled through the air by my belt buckle after the Frisbee. The dog is catching me out of the sky instead of the frisbee. In his mouth. How about this scam? I got a scam for you.

Okay. You're at the airplane. Yeah. But you don't have a ticket. Take it. Fly the plane. If you have the outfit. Fly the plane. If you have the outfit. You're at you have the outfit you're at the airplane all you need is the outfit may i see your ticket no i'm flying the plane fly the plane yeah is there

another like how would you like basically fly themselves you're at the airplane dude yes like is that how you would do it or is there another approach you would take you have no ticket how do you get on the plane i mean that's it i think all you need is like a costume like scams like costumes really come into play i mean i won't lie i've been to some very popular nightclubs and like couldn't get into vip because it was like i don't know like nba all-star weekend or something and then you know what was next to me name the club put them on blast um what's the club? What are you going to, One Oak? It's like something like One Oak, but it's not open.

Club DV8? Fuck no. It's something that's not open anymore, but it was a popular club back in the day. And we were young. And you know what was next to us? Lots of cups. And you know what we happened to be in? Black dresses.

So we picked up those lots of cups and we put them over our heads and we walked into vips we were like yeah we're bottle service girls oh you were and they had tons of extra security because it was like a very popular night so people didn't know who worked there and it's dark and you scam them oh you know i own like several different color wristbands and I bring them with me places to events could also be like costume of like

somebody like Beetlejuice or something you could say you're Beetlejuice yes true Beetlejuice would not

have done much for me that night though if you say it a third time yeah you have to get them to say it yeah well

I mean at that point You could then be the bye bye man What Well I'm just saying if you want to be someone Who people aren't really going to push back On a lot Who they wouldn't necessarily recognize But they've heard of them for sure

Not many people try to tangle with the bye bye man Or with Slenderman Okay I've never heard with the bye-bye man or with slender man okay i've never heard of the bye-bye man what yeah i mean i can get from the name i can pretty much like discern what the bye-bye man is like maybe a murderer i'm guessing like you go bye-bye when the bye-bye man comes bye-bye oh he just like says bye- like that it's absolutely the goose pimples that I mentioned getting when I first walk into these

what is this goose pimple thing pimple makes me think there's like pus involved when I get the chicken flesh there's a lot of pus turkey bumps I feel like it's just so harder to say goose like goose bumps feel like kind of like the sexier of the scary yeah for me it's just so hotter to say goose like goosebumps feel like oh like kind of like the sexier uh of

the of the scary yeah for me it's not sexual okay i mean i could see that i don't know like i watch there's a woman in a white t-shirt running away and somehow it starts raining and she has goosebumps and it's very sexual. Okay. Those are nipples. Brett? I think those are two different things. Brett? It's 2019. We all have nipples.

We don't say nipples anymore. What do we say? We all have nipples. We call them goosebumps now? They're called goose pimples. That's so not hot. God. Help me with a so not hot. God. Help me with a scam, please. Yeah.

I'm trying to watch Blackadder on Hulu. Uh-huh. Okay. Starring Mr. Bean, but the smart version of him. Mr. Bean, but he's talking. I don't have Hulu. How do I get Hulu? What's the fastest way that you'd scam me to get Hulu?

Scam me into Blackadder, please. Marathon style. I mean, you find someone who has Hulu and then you get their Hulu. I don't have time. I can't. Okay. I feel like if you tweeted that you want someone's Hulu login, you would get so many Hulu logins. Okay.

I'm not even kidding. People would give you their Hulu login just to know that you're watching their Hulu and then see what you're watching. Because you can make their little page different. Also, if you threaten to quit Hulu, everyone go out and try to cancel your Hulu. Because if you do, they'll give you half off for three months. Wow. Go fake cancel your Hulu. Wow.

Okay. There's no computer. How do I watch it without a computer? Or like, what do I, how do I see it? I mean, that's not a problem. You know, there's computers out here that don't belong to you. And you have one of those. You just have one of those.

Just have a computer that doesn't belong to me. Where do you find them mostly? Anywhere and everywhere. You know what I mean? There's computers all over the place. Yeah. You have to truly just be opportunistic about where you have a computer. Speaking of computers, Scam, I'm doing a website, bugsite.com, that collects pictures of sexy bugs.

Okay. I'm into it. Users can upload whatever they want. I'm then, of course, selling these bugs to other bugs. Okay. Okay. What is money for bugs? Ooh, money for bugs is like stale Doritos.

Doritos? Okay, that checks out. That's what I've been finding. Yes, that's mostly what I've been getting. I got lucky that this guy didn't scam me, an apartment guy. When I was first moving to LA, which I was riddled with desperation to find a home for my body, just to put a roof and then put my body underneath.

Yeah, so tough to find a place to put your body, like just to like put a roof, like, and then like put my body underneath. Yeah. So tough to find a place to put your body at times. Every night you need to store your body somewhere. Every single night. And it's expensive to store your body every night. Like, so I was looking for like, you know,

four walls and a roof. And I went to this apartment and like the price was great. And it was like two bedroom and it's in Hollywood. And I was like, this is so awesome. And he gives me this paperwork and he's like okay you have to sign this bed bug paperwork I have a cashier strike I'm like ready to close

and I was like bed bugs oh okay and it's just like oh if you bring them you're kind of liable for their extermination and I was like okay that makes sense like whatever then I was like are there any other bugs here and he was like oh no what do you mean by other bugs and I was like is this okay Kevin What do you mean by other blokes? And I was like... Is this okay?

Kevin, is that okay? Kevin, can we do that sort of impression? I'd also like to say that I'm black, so I'm oppressed, so I do whatever impersonations I want. Okay, I just don't think I want to know exactly what this guy is. And I definitely don't want to be

scammed in this way. Being black is a scam and it's also a scam that you can run. It's just not as beneficial to run it as a scam. It just itself is a scam. Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah. Okay. I'm learning. Continue. Yeah. We often talk about Lean into it more if you want.

I will. We talk about how like there's a joke about like Jim Crow and how when colored people had to go to water fountains that were different colored people. Oh, God, I'm black. We don't say color. Is that OK? I can say whatever I want. Don't join in, but I'll say whatever I want.

I'm not talking for another half an hour. they talk about how like when they desegregated water fountains someone was like man some guy just lost half his business because he was making white ones and black ones and now he's only making one water fountain because you don't need to um and also what about the guy who made all the placards um you know i'm gonna get canceled who we? so you say we talk about this oh like black people my black friends it's not like we're like man we feel for that guy we don't we don't feel for that guy but it is funny to think about how

things affect other things but anyway being black is a scam that white people created it is you know what I mean it comes with lots of it's very slippery you know what I mean that white people created. It is. You know what I mean? It comes with lots of, it's very slippery.

You know what I mean? Like, black people are weird. I feel like that's why we don't rock climb and stuff. We all, everyone's made this joke. Kevin, is this okay? Being black is exciting. Being black is very thrilling.

I leave my house every day and I'm like, will I come back? Just because I'm black. That's funny, but it's also true and sad. Anyway, there was a point to this this guy was talking to you

the landlord with the accent that I won't do but you will and also I'm not trying to tell you where the accent's from so can it be that racist because it's like doing general you know how people do general in those movies, the time period movies everyone's like kind of british

but like no really and it's like we're in greece like it's like that right it's not it doesn't sound exactly like that i feel like it's like that i feel like i'm doing the same thing uh yeah i feel like if the guy turns it turns out is british then maybe it's okay then yeah then it's just a very bad job at a British accent but I've heard you do a British accent now so I can't anyway well so this is not British though everyone guess do you want to guess I mean I it's

just like a low upside I do have a guess, though. Even if I'm right, yeah. I want to know your guess when we get off the air. Okay, when we guess. Okay, so yeah, he's like, oh, there are bugs. And I was like, oh, bugs.

I was like, what kind of bugs? And he was like, oh, well, there are roaches. And I was like, what do you mean there are roaches? And he was like, I mean, there are roaches. And I was like, are there roaches in the building? He was like I mean there are roaches and I was like are there roaches like in the building he was like yes of course every building in Hollywood has roaches and I was like what and I was like okay

like I didn't see any like droppings or like anything I opened all the cabinets that's what you're supposed to do when you go in an apartment you're supposed to open all the cabinets really smell see if they've roach bombed anything and then like he was like oh no when you have house clean, no roaches. But when you leave crumb,

roaches will come. One crumb. One crumb, he said. And then the roaches would descend upon the apartment. So I didn't take that apartment. But that being said, Dorito crumbs. Those are bug food.

That's bug money. Oh wait, no, you said bug food. Yeah, and food is sometimes money. Currency can be anything. It's bug money. Chocolate coins, Brett said. And Brett found a way to solve the puzzle. Solve it all.

So, okay. So, food is bug money. Well, is there anything... That clears up my website problem. You're selling bugs to other bugs? Pictures of them, yes. Oh, pictures. Did you do like Facebook?

Like, did you have the bugs sign away the rights to the photos when they upload the photos? Absolutely. Yeah. There's a whole user agreement that they never read the fine print on. Okay, tight. Yeah. And I'm allowed to be friends with the bugs. That's also in the user agreement?

That's also in the user agreement? A lot of the agreement is that we actually are good friends. And so they sign the site and say... I'm one of their best friends. One of their best friends.

Yes. And if there's something like I'm having like a big event or a birthday party or fundraiser that the bugs do have to show up and they do have to

put a smile on their face. And they have to give to the GoFundMe as well? Yeah. That's also another great scam. GoFundMe? GoFundMe's for web series. That is smart because who's ever going to check to watch the web series?

No one's going to watch your web series! Because nobody fucking wants to so and but we ease our guilt by paying to the go from me i'm like look i'm never gonna watch this but here's 20 bucks right yeah people can keep all the money you never have to make it and you can say like they'll get a poster or something the last thing they want in the world. Nobody wants a poster of your fucking web series. I gave $20. I'm just wondering when I'm going to get my poster. Where exactly is the poster? Gross, too. Like, oh, the poster is

the top of some orange pubes. Do you want it? Just the top. And if you get it, I want to see it in your house. When I come to your place, it better be hanging up. You can have access to our dailies. You can hear all of our audio. We're going to send you all of the sound.

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Mania! Life can be ridiculous, but you know what's not funny? Getting ripped off. harry's agrees so what we want to talk about today with sorry you said harry's or harry i said harry's we always talk about harry's first and then we talk about you clean harry uh who are sort of our new noted mask i don't know note Note taken. For this campaign. Talk about Harry's first. What we want to talk about

is something funny that happened to you recently. A ridiculous or fun situation that you were in recently. That's the prompt and that'll take us into discussing the product. Particularly funny.

How great the product is. Funny to me or funny to just anyone i i mean do you you feel like there's a difference there like you yeah i mean i've had things happen to me that i suppose you would find funny okay but that you didn't find funny and and you have not really and you have things that have happened that you would find funny but the rest of the world would not yeah i guess i'm interested in that one that you would find funny but the rest of the world would not. I guess I'm interested in that one. That I would find funny?

Yes. But that others would not find funny. You seem to think that you have a specific taste when it comes to what's funny or ridiculous that is not. I ordered

a scented spray for my pillow to help me sleep at night like a lavender scent okay and uh they accidentally sent me two okay so you understand that most people would not buy that funny or ridiculous but but you but you do i just had a little chuckle about the mix up at the at the shipping uh warehouse harry saw customers getting screwed over by questionable that's a come up overpriced shaving product harry on the come up i decided to do something better instead of charging the same stupid high prices harry on the come up i decided to do something better instead of charging the same stupid high prices harry's found their own way to double scent bottle beautifully designed razors for a fraction of the price of other big brands except bogo baby exceptional products honest

prices i don't is there a bogo as part of this because i don't want to be like talking about no but that's what happened that are no but i clean harry punk harry's two bottles buy one get one their deodorant their lotion their body wash their hair gel all very high quality products they all smell great german engineer blades made in their own factory they stay sharp longer you get a five blade razor weighted handle foaming shave gel and a travel cover for just three bucks at Harrys.com slash the boys. Highest customer satisfaction in the shaving industry. No risk trial. Don't like your shave?

No worries. It's on them. Getting ripped off isn't funny. Do you want to hear what happened to me that you might find funny? Yes. Yes, sure. But that you didn't. Yeah.

So you're attuned to this stuff i got my foot stuck in the dryer at the laundromat and it somehow turned on and you know that that was something other people would find funny based on well the responses you were you were getting a lot of people inside that laundromat seemed to find it pretty humorous when my leg started spinning around and flipping me over what happened was i was holding my laundry basket with both hands and i saw oh still a sock left in the dryer so i stuck my foot and tried to pick it up with my little toesies i wear sandals, punk, and as I'm picking it up, I just sort of tripped, and my foot got wedged in between.

There's like slats in there, and it's stuck inside there, and then I don't know who, somebody pushed the button or what, but it turned on, and the thing starts flipping over, and I'm flying in circles. Help, punk! Help me, you you punks are your clothes staying in the basket are you going fast no no no i'm wearing all of them by the end of the cycle get started with a 13 trial set for just three dollars at harry's.com slash the boys that's harry's.com slash the boys for a three dollar trial set what is another famous scam is there any other ones any other famous scams yes god i mean the government um that's a huge one that could be its own episode that honestly could be its own entire episode it's i feel

like it could be its own year the government is fake the government is like always perpetrating scams yeah but also you can get over on the government because you have to remember only in certain ways like i don't fuck with the irs because eventually they will put you in jail okay but there are other agencies that i will fuck with because of the people who work there fda yeah Yeah. DMV. Fuck yeah. Because nobody at the DMV is passionate about their job.

Yeah. So you can get away with a lot of shit. What are you doing there? Just going, hanging out? Use their chairs for whatever you want?

Fucking love their chairs. Yeah. Have you ever sat in a DMV chair? Yes, you have. And probably for three hours. How'd your ass feel afterwards? Think about how your ass felt. I'm picturing it now.

Pretty deece. Yeah. Like when I left, I was mad that I sat there for so long, but I wasn't like, ooh, my ass hurts. But it's weird to go back

and like sit down again after you're done. It's it. No, you're allowed to. That's the scam, Hayes. Right. If you want free AC. Free chair.

DMV. Free chair. Basically, I go and that's my WeWork. It That's the scam, Hayes. Right. If you want free AC. Free chair. DMV. Free chair. Basically, I go and that's my WeWork. It's just the DMV waiting area. Truly. Truly can be. You could probably get some Wi-Fi. They have it.

Free headshots. And nobody questions you for being there. No one questions you for being there. It's a one-stop shop. Or being there for a long time. Just bring a piece of your mail. If anybody else going, yeah, no. Proof of residence.

A piece of mail at people. Yeah, I forgot this last time. The way you can scan the FDA, I found, is they can't eat the food that you are bringing in to sell. So you go and like, I have this food. I'm going to sell this food. They can smell it. They can look at it. But they can't eat it.

Because you have to be able to take it out with you. Because then there won't be food anymore. So all you have to do is make sure it smells okay. Yeah. And they have to stamp it and be like, yes, this is fine. So if I were to bring in styrofoam, but I cover it with a really good cheese sauce or something. Yes, yes. Perfect example.

Then the FDA would be like, this smells good. I have it in very clean containers. It looks good. Yes, yeah. Perfect example. Then the FDA would be like, this smells good. I have it in like very clean containers. It looks good. Yes, yeah. And then you can reuse the container. Yeah. After you sell it.

And if you brought that in and you said, this is Power Cake. It gives you special powers. Can I, can I sell this Power Cake for a billion bucks? And then it makes kids able

to fly through walls or whatever right yes then you come back here they have to at least approve a trial and then Brett

like once he eats it and is like okay there's only cheese on the outside of this there's no cake on the inside it's foam it's too

like he has no grounds at that point no grounds because there's no legal grounds because the FDA has stamped it. So the FDA is letting us eat guinea pigs. Stamped it and he's eating it. So the FDA, which makes sense because FDA is constantly recalling things like, hey, we let you eat this and turns out you died.

But yeah, but it's like it's too late. I'm going to die from it? Like we ate it already. The way you eat it? You can't recall? Yeah, but we stopped everyone else from eating it. Yeah, you died, but everyone else didn't die because we stopped it

from happening after you died. The FDA can't unstamp it, you know what I mean? Yes. They're not going to go through Brett's innards. They don't? Oh, yeah. Please. Disgusting. No, and Brett, you will die. Brett's innards might be clean. Thank you. Not anymore. Firstgusting. No. And Brett, you will die. Breaths and nerds might be clean. Thank you.

Not anymore. You drop one crumb. Not after a slice of power cake this big. It's gonna wreck you. It looks clean right now, but if one crumb falls in breaths and nerds, then the bugs convert. Then the bugs all join in there.

And that's like a contractual thing that like the bugs that Sean has uploading, they live in Brett. Some of my bug friends from bug site probably are residing in Brett right now. Just statistically. It makes Earwolf kind of a one-stop shop because they can come here, buy nudes, be friends with Sean, and then...

Bug nudes specifically, not like other nudes. No, no, no. And the equivalent of the chips that Earwolf gives out is the crumbs in Brett's innards. That's right. Great.

That they can converge on. Tight. Yeah, the photos are all of that moment right before's right great that they can converge on tight yeah the photos are all of that moment right before they fly but they've opened their whole shell to like reveal the underneath part but they haven't started flying yet you know what i mean when bugs do that you know those hot yeah is that hot that's the nudes i feel like if that was like a human nude that would be like the inside of the shaft of a penis okay I don't know if that's the part

that people are interested in after no it's a part right before right when the penis is kind of like unfurling itself before it like real like is fully like flying

okay so yeah yeah I don't know if I want to look at that right when the flaps are starting to like Before it like real, like is fully. Before it starts like flying. Okay. So yeah. Yeah. I don't know if I want to look at that. Right when the flaps are starting to like come loose. I feel like that's not what people are looking. People are looking for like external, like I want to see the ant's butt. Like, you know, ants have like, honestly, Instagram models are shaped just like ants. Like they have the big.

Seems like she might be in the market for some of these pics. She just said she wants to see an ant's butt. Oh. Actually, thanks. Yeah, I do have that. Have you ever looked at an ant's butt and then looked at Kim Kardashian? And then look at them and they have shape. Don't ants have three butts?

Wow. She might pay three butts? Wow. They pay three times as much. I'll have to triple the fee. Make the same. Yeah, they do have three butts and I got photos of all of them. Okay. I'm interested.

I know you are. I heard you say that. I can hear you. Okay. All right. She's listening in say that. I can hear you. Okay. All right. She's listening in. She's eavesdropping. Okay.

It's not called eavesdropping when we're face-to-face and we're talking to one another. You just kind of turned catty-cornered to me, but you're still talking, and I'm still here. Are we going to close the deal? I mean, like, how much? Now I'm afraid she's talking to me. I am talking to you. Okay. me. I am talking to you. Okay. Sean, I'm talking to you.

Uh-huh. So, did you say how much? Yes, I did. I asked how much. You're a very shy business person. What's something that you need right now? Just say what you need and we'll give that to you. Are you guys selling something or no? Because it seems

like there's a lot of hesitation. There's a lot of nerves. Two congrats on the successful scam goddess launch signs. I own those. I won't negotiate. I own those signs. But that's what he's saying. He wants to buy them. I want to trade

them. Oh, you want to trade them. Yeah, you want to see these freaking ant butts? You're going to have to pay through the nose and scam goddess signs. Honestly, ant butts aren't enough for the signs. How about ant butts? Okay, well, I'm willing to negotiate. How about ant butts and the Hollywood handbooks sign and the cold brew machine that it's behind?

I don't know if I'm authorized to do that. Do you have any more pictures of bees, goose pimples? I do have a bee with goose pimples, yeah. It's not a bee, it's a wasp. That's honestly better. Whoa! Yeah, everyone has their preference. I'm not a bee person.

Too small. And there is no kink shaming in this studio. Yeah. Plus can't wasps live after they sting you? Can wasps live? Can wasps live? Can they live, please? Can wasps live?

Yeah. they can. That's hot. Because the bee dies, and then that's uncomfortable. That sucks, yeah. Yeah, but the wasp lives, and then the bee. Yes, the wasp in these pictures is dead. Oh, okay. It's a dead wasp.

I don't want to look at dead wasp porn. But it's from dead wasp. I don't want to look at dead wasp porn. But it's from totally other reasons. I don't want to look at a dead wasp for sexual pleasure. It has to be alive. It was poisoned. Yeah. And the bee dying is not part of it for me. I don't know if these bugs like you that much, if you're like selling their.

Well, why don't you read the user agreement and find out? There's not really a lot of room for interpretation there. I heard you wrote it yourself, which I'm pretty sure is not legally binding. And they signed it. I don't think that's how laws work. Oh, really? Yeah. So nobody wrote

them. Are you a lawyer? No, you're not. My wife's a lawyer. Your wife's my lawyer. That's right. But that doesn't mean... But she's not appeared. You're my wife's lawyer. That's right. But she's not here. So I don't know. It's helpful for people to know like, oh, how'd they get Lacey on this show? Okay.

That's not how I got on this show. Professional obligation. I heard you guys wanted to fight me. I heard you wanted to fight me. I don't remember saying that. That's how we get a lot of people to come on the show. Four grown men wanted to fight me. And don't remember saying that. Four grown men. That's how we get a lot of people to come on the show. Four grown men wanted to fight me and I said, that's fine. I'll fight anybody.

Well, let's just do a podcast first and then we can fight afterwards. Yeah, and we'll fight after the podcast if we still feel like it. Thank you for calling me grown. The Earwolf Fight Club. Yeah, you're very grown, right? Thank you. And you're super grown. Yeah, my innards are clean. Very clean. Spotless, some would say.

There's like Clorox clean. And then there's like Brett's innards clean. Scraped clean. And the bugs. But yeah, no, I was told I would come here. I would have some lace and a knockoff LaCroix called Bubbly. Yep. And then we would fight.

Brett has pulled up a picture of a huge ant's butt. Is that a boil though or is that a butt? I thought the butt was like the color's weird. It's full of honey it looks like. That ant

has been eating so much honey and the ant's friends with a bee, obviously. To have access to honey like that. I feel weird about this ant. Brett is taking a picture of his computer screen. Is this ant sick? Are you showing me a sick ant? This ant's sick as hell.

Sick like S-I-C-C? The ant's sick and thick. It's actually a very good ant And it's worth a lot You've already showed it to me Fuck Brett what did you do You're supposed to like That was the whole allure Is that I didn't see the photos

And I was willing to bargain But now you've like Yeah I've seen it I got my eye high Straight into the bank Well I obviously got scammed Click

I've obviously been scammed. Click. I've obviously been scammed. Yeah. Thank you. That was my whole point. I wanted you to pull it up. Who's coming on the show next? Yeah, who else coming?

Nicole Byer's coming next. Okay. Yeah. You mentioned her as someone who's been on already, I thought. Oh, no. Who's coming after that? Oh, I've recorded 14 episodes already. So. Okay.

That's a scam. You're done. No, no. That's a already. Okay. So you're done. No, no. There's 38 more. But the scam is that they can't be evergreen. They have to be evergreen because I have to leave town. Tell me about Flo Rida, girls. Yeah.

What's your favorite track? From Flo Rida? Yeah. I mean, I'm very partial to Apple Bottom Jeans, Boots With The Furs. And I know that's some of his most popular work, but I honestly think it's some of his most impactful. Yeah, often there's a reason. I've never felt more seen. I had Boots With The Furs.

I had Apple Bottom Jeans because I had an Apple Bottom. And my bottom fit in those jeans. The whole premise of those jeans is like you have a big butt and then you have a small waist and so they make the waist small, but they make the butt big. Did he ever stop by set at all? No, and that was honestly unfortunate.

We wanted to see him. One of our cast members, Melanie, didn't even understand that Flo Rida was spelled like Florida and it completely blew her mind when we told her that. It was like a huge revelation. She cried.

Will the Florida girls be becoming a god, which I have heard this is happening. In that same general region. Oh, in Central Florida. Or in your case, I mean, I guess you did become the scam goddess. Yeah, I did. But I didn't become the scam goddess in Florida. I became the scam goddess in the birth of most scams. Brooklyn,

New York. Oh. What a scam town. The hottest scams are coming out of Brooklyn. Always and forever. And I'm not even kidding. Like,

they're innovators. I like, Silicon Valley for scams is Brooklyn. Mm-hmm. Yeah. The water's different there. Yeah,

it truly is. The bagels. The bagels. The water they put in the scams is Brooklyn. The water's different there. Yeah, it truly is. The bagels. The water they put in the scams makes it different. Who just texted you? Who texted you? Wow. I see you reading texts. And say the truth. First of all, I didn't touch my phone. I didn't touch my phone.

Nobody accused you of that. I feel like Tana's phone shamed me several times. It is face up. The phone is face up. Okay, you know what? Your phone is face down. So that's fair. I feel like Tana's phone shamed me several times. I took one tiny... It is face up. The phone is face up. Okay, you know what? Your phone is face down, so that's fair. I can put my phone face down. Respect.

It was just sitting there. I did not read anything. Who texted you? And say the truth. And you must say the truth. I am getting ambushed on this show so much. And this is going to make for one hell of an article. This says... It says mom and the mom just got home from my date with my girlfriend and my boyfriend because i'm by aunt polly um

which are those are fun things i mean once my mom did say something that was interesting that i was like hmm me too she just told me that happened to me as well dude my mom had me like you guys are trolling me so hard we're shit shitposting. I've never been trolled. I'm literally in person getting shitposted. We're shitposting online. I didn't even know you could do this in person. That's all we do.

My whole personality is shitposting. Who is the text being sent by to you? It's some text and some Instagram notifications. That's all. And i only know that because like one is green and one is purple and pink i haven't read them and no sender on the text you actually know the sender oh yeah return to sender well if we know them. I know them. Okay. Yeah. So let's figure out who it is. Someone who is not that famous. If I know them, they're not doing great.

Quite frankly. They're specifically knowing you? Do I need to stop knowing you? When you get, when you achieve. Is that how I'll do better? Look, you're on a rocket ship to fame. When you reach your destination, you will no longer know me. I've seen it a thousand times before.

And God bless my former friends. How do I do it? Like, do I need to call you? No, that's an opposite of what you need to do. I will always know you. You're married to my lawyer. Yeah. Well, no, but you don't I will always know you. You're married to my lawyer. Yeah. Well, no, but you don't

necessarily have to know me. You'll be like, oh yeah, I knew him. You know me now. I just have to start. I knew him. I just have to start like in past tense.

I have to start bringing up everything that we do in past tense. That would help. Like even right now, I'm like, yeah, I was on his podcast once. The text is from someone who either has a podcast or has been on 300 episodes hell yeah the name's on

this table the name is on this table so i knew that and this is the blood and blood out gang gang table when you sign your name to the table it says that you will choke anybody out with a pair of earwolf headphones upon ass like when you when you're ass, you go to war. Shouldn't even have to ask. Truly. I'd take a bullet for Colin Anderson. Who wouldn't? Is it Colin? Who wouldn't? Is Colin texting you? Colin text you? No, I wish. I get

emails from Colin. I remember those days. You know what? You guys are legendary status, okay? Who is that text from? Who's the sender? If you read all the names on this table, you'll get it. Okay.

Comedy Bang Bang? The text is not from Comedy Bang Bang. That was a really good guess, though, Brett. Thanks. That was good. It's the first name I saw on the table. Truly a good guess. That was really smart. Wait, is this you? No.

You don't know how to do block letters? Then what Sean is this? Please, I wish. What Sean is that? Sean Conroy or some shit. You're not so happy about that. Who's on your hat? Sean got it for me It's a street light

I like it You know what? Scam pisses me off for real Yeah Bye Hollywood Handbook That was a HeadGum Podcast