Hollywood Handbook - Nick Wiger, Our Close Friend

Episode Date: August 4, 2014

Hayes and Sean start with "Welcome to Welcome to Sweden, etc", where they talk about their favorite new television shows. Then, viral sensation NICK WIGER is in the studio to make some controversial statements about the internet being the future and talk about viral content, Vine, Funny or Die, and monetizing Twitter. Finally, the Popcorn Gallery theme song asks Nick about nothing.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. and I go, hey mister, take that big stovepipe hat off. The hat comes off, turns around, it's Anna Gunn. Hollywood Hamburg. Wearing a man's hat, how strange. Well she, I guess, you know, I talked to her afterwards, we're friends a little. And she's doing like the whole mystery pickup artist thing. She was peacocking, She's single now. And I guess was trying to pick up Hank Azaria. Hey, welcome to Hollywood Handbook and Insider's Guide to Kicking Butt and Dropping Names

on the red carpet lineback hallways of this industry we call showbiz. Listen, when we see a show that we like, we like to come on here and we talk about the show. Especially when they're flying under the radar and they haven't really gotten the attention they deserve because it's on one of these fringe small stations. What's the name of the station? It's NBC. Okay.

There are a few shows out there now that we're getting very excited about, and this is the segment, we should name it, where we talk about good shows, good shows that we like well i mean i thought we might call it welcome to welcome to sweden etc etc as the other shows yes that we talk about good but i feel like we'll always open with this one when we do this segment and we've done it in the past and we've called it that too but the show that we

like yes is this show welcome to sweden it's about a man who moves to sweden and his experience there is it's very weird it actually turns out to be very strange well yeah it's totally cuckoo and because you're thinking sweden's his, right? And yes, it is. But once you actually go there, it's something else entirely. It's so rare for me to connect to a new show. Because as you know, I don't own a television. And so I'm going out to a fancy restaurant. And I don't want to waste my money learning new characters.

And so generally i'll watch coach or something like coach but this time what's like what is that that's like coach um the film devil's advocate and what's how is that like coach it's got the guy I like so anyway I'm out there and I'm thinking I don't want to waste this I just paid all this money for this

veal scallopini and anyways I wind up just saying oh F it I'm going to watch Welcome to Sweden

I loved it and this guy lurved it. And this guy loved it. This guy who's in it, I'm watching him, and I'm thinking, who is this? What is this? I want to know all about it. How the hell? It's this guy, Greg Poehler. So raw.

And I'm looking up him, and I'm looking about him, and I'm finding out all these things, and it turns out that his sister is acting at the same time. And she's in the show. She's at the beginning of the show. Yes. So his sister is a famous actress because she's in the beginning of his show. Yeah.

So they're both actors. They're both on this show. And she is also an executive producer on it uh she's very early in the credits which i heard was not because of there being relationship at all but she saw the script with the first page torn off and didn't even see what the name was and she loved it so much that she said i make this tv show now and so now it's on tv and she finds out showing up on the first day this is her brother this is a guy that she knew when she was a little baby yeah and that's exciting to me the idea to show up at a script you never

found out who it's by yeah it's your brother what an interesting story or your dad or anything and so that's part of i think what makes the show so exciting and it is weird when you're in another country and i remember once because sometimes for work I have to travel. And I remember once I'm going and I'm being in Vienna. And I'm at an amusement park. And the fried dough there just tasted so crazy to me. Now, granted, I've been flying all day. And also, I just was sleepy. So that's part of it, I'm sure.

But yeah, it's the sausage dessert something. But the fried dough just tasted like an alien thing. Those are the sausages. That's the fried dough? Yes. Okay. And that's language barrier stuff, and they cover some of that too on the show.

But it really was an experience that made me think, this could be a TV show. I didn't have time to do it. Greg did. So that's one show that we really love. What are some of the other shows that we... Well, you were saying that you really love what uh what are some of the other shows that we well you were saying that you really love this show uh it's uh emile hirsch's uncle yes and he plays this guy who's

only ever had hamburger sandwich to eat and he eats japanese food sis, and he hates it, but he has to keep eating it because of his new job. Yes, it's Emil Hirsch's uncle. It's Buzz. His name is Buzz Hirsch. And he had this strange experience where he grows up in America where he eats hamburger sandwich because it's their favorite food. But then it's time to go to this job. And he meets his boss, this Japanese guy, played by Emile Hirsch, who's supposed to be old in the thing. What's funny, like.

It was so exciting to see him in it. Yes, and well, what I hear is. In his uncle's show. Yes, and that they, what I heard was they actually hate each other and swore that they would never do anything together. But it's only because of the show being so good that they decided, you know, for the show, for doing the show, we'll decide to hang out together again. And it's true, I think, that Emil has been wanting to play an old Japanese man for quite some time.

Yes. So it's a little bit of kismet fate. And so he plays old Japanese man. And he's the boss of the company that makes it's Mitsubishi and when you go in to Mitsubishi it's in America but it's part of Japan it's technically part of Japan one time I took an ecstasy pill with the Mitsubishi logo on it and I rolled my fucking tits off go ahead keep talking so they go the way it works is he goes to work and he's in japan and he has to eat a big lunch at work and it's all this japanese food but then he goes home and he's in america again so you'll have these weird situations where he's eating two

different kinds of food but he has to do it all in one day. That's a pilot. He has to figure out a way to wake up, have hamburger sandwich for breakfast, go to work, eat a big Japanese food, then go home and have to remember which one he's supposed to eat. Well, there's that scene where he goes and he sticks a chopstick in a hamburger sandwich. Yeah, he gets hurt. Oh, yeah. He tries to eat it like that. The Axie pill story is just the same.

Mitsubishi is a good product. It's just a saying? It's just to say that, to let you know that's a quality product. Because I'm seriously... Japanese engineering. Yes. What's that show that you loved? You were starting to text me about it.

This is the show that Tom Brady's mom was doing. It was a sitcom on the NFL network. Oh, yes. Finally, the NFL is doing scripted because they've been trying to dip their toes in these waters for a little while. Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot what that last show was called. It's called Welcome to Hamburgers. So this is a show.

Now, Tom Brady's mom plays a retired Japanese geisha who no longer can use her feminine wiles to sort of please businessmen and needs to find some new kind of work. So she goes to her new job, and it is having a hamburger sandwich. And so when she's doing, and this is in Germany, when she's doing this, you know, she's also, like, getting all these phone calls, and she can't stand it because she's uh they explain it's complicated they explain early and during the credits kind of that she has a disease where the phone ringing makes her very scared but she keeps getting these phone calls and she's eating the hamburger

sandwich she's never had it before because she only eats like octopus fish and all the squid and all this so she um is very sort of out of sorts but whenever her uh german boss comes by that's tom brady he's in it they got him for it i heard he didn't want to do it and he didn't want to do any acting and then when you were saying lots of football guys was in it. Oh, yes. Yeah. Michael Peterson, is that someone? Michael Sam plays like the busboy.

Yeah. And who's Michael Peterson? Just catch me. I know you're much more of a football guy than I am. Well, he's on the Minneapolis Vikings, and he does touchdowns like madness. And so some of the guys, and if you haven't seen the sport, some of the guys stop touchdowns and some of the guys does touchdowns. And Michael is one of the ones who just really does big touchdowns and it is a thrill and a half. Anyway, Tom Brady plays her boss, Ernst. And when Ernst comes in, if he catches you with the ketchup, you're going to get really, really punched.

They don't like to eat ketchup over there. Well, and you're not allowed. And you are allowed to punch an old woman who works for you. And so it's a cool dynamic it sets up. and it works for you. And so it's a cool dynamic it sets up. And so between that and the phone ringing and all the football guys, whether they're the touchdown guys or not,

you've really got a recipe for success. And that's what I texted you. And Michael Sam is in it, you said? Yeah, he's the busboy, and he's clearing the plates. But at the same time, he's got kind of his own story going on where whenever there's a full moon, he pisses himself. Oh. So, you know, and that's, you can't really control what shift you get if you get a shift during the full moon yeah and you piss yourself but you're wearing that big apron

yeah but he pissed right through the apron in the episode i saw he pissed clean through. It actually made a hole in it. Threw it. Yeah, like it made a stain, and then the stain melted a hole. So I don't know what they're trying to say about his diet or what. But something strange. Well, it seems like they're trying to say something about, I don't know if I'm reading it into it too much, but it seems like something about his sexual orientation.

Does that imply it at all? Why? What's up with his? Well, he's gay. He's gay? Yeah. Okay. That's okay with you?

I mean, what do you want me to get into it now? It's fine. You can't have a kid. I mean, you literally can't. Okay. You like the show. You can have have a kid. I mean, you literally can't. Okay. You like the show. You can have one. But when people are like, my family, my kid, I'm like, well, it's not fucking yours.

And I know that because you're straight up a gay dude and you told me that. And so it's like that aspect of it. It's fake. Yeah, that's fake. They're faking. Well, and they're lying. And so that kind of pretending is not okay with me? Just, like, just say what you did.

You bought it. You know what I mean? I mean, it's yours, like, in the way that, like, my canoe is my canoe. But when I'm out, and actually, it's not like that because I made it. Anyway, I don't want to get into it. But as far as them being people or doing football or being on this great show, which was, you know, almost funny as Welcome to Sweden, as far as any of that, I think it's great.

I just asked because you said you liked it, and I know that you just have a low tolerance for people being fake that way. I hate fake. I hate when people are fake. All the details, yeah. Yeah, no, I don't like when people are fake. That's true. And I think it goes back to when I, you know, had that.

I mean, I accidentally had sex with a doll that I thought was a person. Yeah. And that sort of raised your awareness about fake stuff. Well, how dangerous it can be. Not knowing what's real and, yeah. And some of the science now where they're trying to do these simulators and these hologram and the 3D printing and all of it, and I'm like, well, it's slippery slope.

It's like they're trying to trick you. Yeah. It does feel that way. We have a great guest today. Nick Weiger is here. He, you know him from Funny or Die. The doll was a girl. It looked like a girl.

I'm not saying. No. No, I just said I'm not saying. No. No, I just said I'm fine with the Michael Sam and I am, if he really is that, or I don't know if you're trying to trick me. But when I had sex with the doll. Yeah, it was a hot, you know, it had big. Well, and for people who don't know the whole story, somebody had put a radio right behind its head.

So you think, oh, it's... So I did think it was talking to me. It's singing, yeah. What song? So raise your glass if you're... Yeah. And so you... Never be, never be...

So you... Never be, never be. It's a very strong signal. You hear that, you think. What else are you going to think? You hear something, you know, someone is looking right at you, singing that song. Yeah, so. Anyway, you were going to do the guest the guests yes we have a great guest today nick weiger is here and uh he's on he's done funny or die and uh now he writes for at midnight and he's a he's a writer performer and he's very good and he's going to talk to us

all about viral content and technology very soon coming right up on Hollywood Handbook. Were you making fun of me? When? The whole thing just now. It just feels like you're laughing at me or something. The fact that you would say that to me now after you went through that whole thing and that I put a fair amount of time into working with you about that, didn't I?

Do I have so much time that I can like come to your house right away when you're like thinking about it too much? Well, that's what made me scared about it is like – is if you're like this sort of – and I don't see you as this kind of person but if you're this sort of ghoulish sort of figure who just seizes on the fact that I'm vulnerable because when I learned it, as you know, I got pretty scared and got pretty violent with myself. and got pretty violent with myself. I mean, you know, and I don't want to take this back at you, but the fact that you would make that assumption about me that this is something I would do with my life. You know, I have things going on. I can't just take, you know, we took a trip. I know that.

You know, we took a trip together about this to the factory. Yeah, we had to go. So you could see. How they make the doll. That this is just a doll. Yeah, and that there are several of the kind that I was with. And there's no attachment there. And that's what they're for, yeah.

And they don't love anybody. Yes. No, yes. Remember, we had to... Yeah, we talked to all the employees. Mm-hmm. Yes. No.

I know. That wasn't, you know, to say now... I feel so self-conscious around it and the fact that you know so much about it. I know that's what it is. It makes me almost scared that I am going to get, you know, pow, surprise, you're getting recorded. I mean, I know this is recorded, but in all the things I'm doing that you're trying to somehow do like a Jamie Kennedy experiment thing with me. Or something like this.

But I'm getting it on both ends. Because when we went to the factory, you were saying that was a Jamie Kennedy experiment as well. Remember that? Yes. Saying that it was a real thing. Well, that it wasn't a real factory. And it was sort of a Jamie Kennedy style thing where you'd set up the factory. That I had set up the factory to X you. Yes.

But, and now that, you know, now that it's not that anymore, it seems like I'm, one way or another, I'm Jamie Kennedy experimenting you. There's nothing I can do. No, I hope that you're not. No, you're doing it right now. You're just being honest. But I can't ask? I mean, it's pretty scary to get exed. Like, that's a real fear that people have in this town specifically.

You can ask? I mean, there's a difference between asking. And I know your awareness is so heightened. And you're very skittish now after sort of what's happened to you. Emmanuel told me that you're the one who put the radio there. And that's what I haven't told you. And that's why I. Who told you that? Emmanuel told me that you were the one who put the radio there.

And so that's why I'm nervous. Because it's a very convenient place where it really does make it seem like the head is talking or singing. That I put it behind the doll. That she saw you put the radio, which was an odd place for the radio, you know, because it was on a windowsill. And I played a song that I know you find provocative. Pretty sensual. Okay. Say it started as one thing.

An axing. An axing. Okay. Okay. What it became and, like, what you did is not what I anticipated would happen. Just, like, the degree of it the proposing and no everything before that the just the aggressive nature of the just the way it went down... Because I did it in a mean way.

It was a little mean. Yeah. Some of the language. The language was not good. That's actually not what I'm talking about. Because some of the words are not, you know. We don't have, you know. I mean, you know as well as I do.

You know, I was using the N-word. All of that, as it was happening, I'm watching this thinking, now do I go stop it? I don't feel like I can because. Afraid you'd lose your hand, yeah. And so after that, you know, I'm, yes. Did it start as an axing?

Yes. Ever since then, I feel like I've been trying to, you know, to make it something else. Well, and I think that what we both found out is that maybe what I... I had some stuff that I did need to work through. Whether we did it at a doll factory or whether we did it on our trip. It ended up being a nice thing. Yes.

And I feel closer to you, but I did want to know because I did think it was an X-ing. Right. Well, you seemed... And now I'm not so nervous that you're trying to still do it to me because I really sniffed it Right. Well, you seem... And now I'm not so nervous that you're trying to still do it to me because I really sniffed it out. Well, yes. Because the sense that you had is that somewhere at some point an X-ing

was happening to you. I was getting X-ed. Since it happened until now, you've just been trying to basically find the X in your life history. And doesn't it feel better now that you've found it? And I do feel better, and thank you for admitting that.

And I know that wasn't easy. And I love you. I love you, too. We have a great guest today. Nick Weiger's here, and he's from Funnier Dive. Coming right up on Hollywood Handbook. So, I'm at the Air and Space Museum with Jenna Fisher. And we're in that little theater they have there.

You watch the movie about planes or whatever. She's like, I wore my overalls for you. What do you mean? She's like, to make it easier to finger me. Does that make any sense to you? Does she, well, what does she think? The angle was just killing my wrist. What does she think fingering is?

That seems like it would make it much harder. Well, yeah, and this was the conversation we were having, you know? And ultimately some kid shushed us. He was like on his eighth grade Washington, D.C. trip and he shushed us. But it bailed me out in a way. Hey! What up, what up? Welcome to Hollywood Handbook and Insider's Guide to Kicking Butt and Dropping Names in

the Red Carpet Lineback Hallways of this industry we call showbiz. Welcome and what up, what up to Nick Weiger, our guest today. We've been excited to have someone from the viral space for a while. I mean, to get you for something like that is a real thrill. So thank you so much for being here. I mean, it's a thrill to be here and discuss this aspect of the entertainment industry that I feel like kind of gets, I feel like it gets some guff. It gets kind of the short set.

It actually does get guff. Yes, it's taking on guff, and it gets second billing when, for me, it's actually tops. Well, how are you spending your time and being entertained these days? We are in the entertainment industry, right? You're spending it online. You're watching viral content. You're not going to the Cineplex every night, but you're maybe six hours a day at your job when you should be working. You're checking out what's on the top websites.

And it's tiny movies is really all it is. It really is. It really is. And it is for free. It is for free and it is the most intimate entertainment experience because you can, unlike other forms of entertainment, you can have it in your home or at your workspace. Just flying in bed. Yes.

I'm so glad you guys mentioned that because the idea of it being intimate, of it connecting to an audience so directly is what appeals to me about viral content. I could make movies. I could go, I could write a screenplay and sell it tomorrow. I could go, I've been offered TV shows. They've just said, hey, Nick, you want a TV show? I'd buy it. Yeah, of course.

You guys would. Anyone would. But I'm not interested in that. show. I'd buy it. Yeah, of course. You guys would. Anyone would. But I'm not interested in that. I'm interested in the internet. This is the new frontier of cinema. This is the new frontier of pop culture.

I'm trying to blaze a trail alongside my fellow Viners, my fellow YouTubers, my fellow viral content engineers, I call them, viral content engineers, or viral-gineers. Let's backtrack a little bit. Sure.

It starts for you, I guess, with Funny or Die is where you're sort of coming from. People know Will, and they know Chris Henchy, and they know Adam McKay, but who's, where does Nick Henchy, and they know Adam McKay. But where does Nick...

Hench. Sorry. The Henchman. The Henchman, yeah. Wicked Henchman. He's the best. He's the best. Yeah.

Yeah, I mean, I guess the way to think of it is, you know, those three names are kind of like a triangle. you know, those three names are kind of like a triangle. And I'm at the center of that triangle, like, as its core. Right, holding up the sides. Basically holding it all together. It's kind of like, you know how Atlas has the earth on his back? I'm kind of like that, except I'm holding up all three sides of the company. And mind, body, and spirit on each side. Yes, yeah, yeah, it is.

Yes, and you're sort of the uniting factor. Yeah. That's how I like to think of it anyway, and how they think of it. I mean, I am speaking for them, and I have their permission to speak for them. So, yeah, I mean, you know, the idea of the company is to, again, getting back to what you guys were saying earlier, it's about engaging with the audience and how better to engage with the audience but let them decide the fate of the content you put out there. Sure.

Is it funny? Does it die? Yeah. Which is it? That's up to you. And let's explain, I guess, to people who don't know sort of how to do it, how to do funnier die, where if I want to

look at it and I show up and I'm saying, let's go, and now I want it. I can't wait to see it. In this scenario, I'm like, let's go, let's see it. And now what? What am I doing? So you're looking to see, you want to

see what funnier die is? Even further back, I would i would say yeah just from a just from a direction of like so i would love to see it i can't wait i've i've carved out some time i'm not hungry i'm not sleepy i'm ready to watch you know i don't need to take care of any other physical needs i can breathe easily you know i don't need to take care of any other physical needs. I can breathe easily. Sometimes I get these sort of asthma episodes. It's not one of those days. As far as your Maslow's hierarchy of needs, all the basic ones are provided for.

Except for funny or die. Except for funny or die. Except for my funny or die, yeah. Okay, so you're getting to that tier, and you're wondering what that experience is. to that tier and you're wondering what that experience is. What I would say is just make

sure your sides are in a state where they can handle being split. If you have some socks on, just make sure you're in a room where you can easily find them once they get knocked off. And then if you're wearing a bow where you can easily find them once they get knocked off um and then uh if you're wearing a bow tie uh just don't be lying on your back because you might lift off like a helicopter

when it starts spinning because you are about to experience something and doing that from when that happens from the neck yeah and it lifts you up like that it's really bad very dangerous yeah very dangerous really bad for your back yeah so um, yeah, very dangerous. It's really bad for your back, yeah. So, but yeah, I mean, that's basically it. Just like, just strap yourself in and enjoy the ride. It happened to an uncle of mine that he did get lifted off from his neck, and it's really bad for your back. What happened? Did he?

Well, he's okay now, thank God, but he's in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. Jesus. Yeah, and because he had a now, thank God, but he's in a wheelchair for the rest of his life. Jesus. Yeah, and because he had a ceiling fan above him, and so the two spinners got caught together. The spinning bow tie and the spinning ceiling fan were spinning at opposite angles, and it wound up flinging him. And it flinged him really hard. Honestly, legitimately hard. hard like honestly legitimately hard and we are we talking like was in like a parlor like some sort of big room with some distant walls where he was really able to get some momentum and and fly

or was it a more compact room or have i told you this story before because it was a parlor and it had very like very distant walls is how i always explain it because sure you know because to get the trajectory to do what happened to him, which was that his legs disintegrated essentially when he hit the wall. Yeah, geez. And it was a marble wall because it was a fancy parlor. So the site we're talking about, it's like split cider. It's like split cider in the sense that it is on the internet.

From that standpoint, you can access it by going through your browser window. In that aspect, it is very similar to Splitsider. Yeah, via your browser window. But it's a little different in that I feel like Splitsider is more analyzing the content that's out there. And that's great. That's content in and of itself. They're creating content.'re they're you know connecting people with our short lived snl stars not talking about the experience on your um it's it's less about that and it's more about it's more about skits um some people call them sketches but we call them in the industry you call them skits snl stars of tomorrow perhaps well possibly you know but again you know like what like snl

the internet the line is blurred these days it's the same like being on tv is literally the same as being on youtube as far as i'm concerned it is the same thing and so this gets is that stuff really happen sometimes it does i mean it really happens in the sense that it is documented on camera and put together into a video, and once that happens, it's happened. It's not computers. Well, I mean, computers are everywhere these days. I mean, how do you avoid computers? I mean, you probably use touch-ups.

That can be a skit. I don't work there, but that can be a skit, actually, because computers is everywhere. So, you know, what if? Like, what if? You know, they're in a bird's nest or something. But it's like, for real. It's not like Bugs Life.

Well, yeah, it's not exactly like Bugs Life. It's really happened. It has happened. I mean, in a sense, Bugs Life has happened, because it's been made into a movie, and now that's a fictional thing that's in the zeitgeist. Yeah, happened to me. People talk about it all the time. Yeah, happened to me.

That's your story. Bugs Life is your story. You're the inspiration for Flick. In many ways, yeah. One thing I like when I'm on my computer is if I'm going to watch, you know, see a little bit of cleavage. Oh, yeah. So some, yeah, some TNA. I mean, we're not shy about that on the site.

You know, you put, it's talking about TNT is the acronym we use, tit in the thumbnail. Yeah, when I did it that one time, it's a site of little pictures of décolletage. Yeah, no, you put a busty woman in your thumbnail, whatever the content is, it's going to get more clicks. It's got a better chance of going viral. And so that's a calculated thing we make. Is it a little crass?

Is it a little commercial? Yeah. So is fucking hiring Michael Bay as your director, all right? Oh my God, Michael. You know? What a gross man. is your director, all right? Oh my God, Michael. You know? What a gross man. So don't look down on me for using a little TNA to get people to watch my skits.

I mean, that's just the game. That's Hollywood. I find if you want to click it, you have to cover it up with the arrow. Yeah, I mean, that was a problem. I feel like that's more of a Web 1.0 problem that people were having for a while is that they would click on the video and they'd be like

what's this arrow this floating arrow in space have to do with I can't see it anymore is it a character is this like a part of the scene like what's going on why aren't the people in the world acknowledging this little you know arrow or sometimes like a kind of a Mickey Mouse hand

like why aren't they talking about that? Then over time, audiences got more sophisticated. Things like tablets and phones, which don't have a cursor, came about and it became less of an issue. My little cousin, Sam, is crazy with computers. A total whiz. And he can make the hand look as if it is picking a person's nose oh my god that is great and it's another layer to the video because the person you know uh it's not their hand their hand can be doing something else funny i whatever it is you know or or die yeah but um but he makes it do it and uh it's been pretty good at thanksgiving and stuff We all like it. You said his name was Sam? Mm-hmm.

Does Sam listen to the podcast? Well, unfortunately, sometimes he's here for it. Sometimes it seems like he's the engineer. He's one of the engineers. He's one of the engineers, okay. Sometimes I wonder, though, the answer to that question. Is he actually listening, or is he just off in his own world, or is he jeffing off?

Well, if I could just say a little thing to Sam, because what you just described sounds like that sounds like textbook viral content i mean that's the kind of thing that if he's not vining that he should be vining that if he's not if he's not doing that and uploading that uh regularly then i i frankly i don't know what he's doing is he in school since he i don't know he found your uncle uh i guess when i got his oh he found his uncle in the aftermath of the parlor well sean's uncle sean's uncle yes of course yeah and i think he's taking a little time off school okay okay well in any event if he's got a feet you know whatever he's doing this should take priority because that sounds like the kind of thing using a cursor to pick someone's nose.

Every brand is going to want to turn that into a branded video. So that's the sort of thing that he could be – maybe he's paying for his father or your uncle's medical bills via his viral success. Nick, you mentioned Vine. Is surprise important to Vine? Is surprise important to Vine? Is surprise important to Vine? Yeah. Yeah. I mean, I think so.

I think you want to subvert expectations. Speak on that. But you also want to subvert those expectations by living up to people's expectations. Because if you go in expecting one thing and you get something else, part of you is a little peeved. So you kind of want what you got in there for in the first place. But you also don't want what you got in there for because if you get that, then it's predictable. You're like, what am I doing? I'm wasting my time with this.

It's funny how mad I am that I didn't get what I wanted at first. That might be something you both die on. And you don't want to do that. Or actually, your content creator doesn't want you to do that. If you you want to do that that's up to you you know that's that's the choice um but yeah we you know you want to subvert but also live up to expectations you want to pay off on two levels you want it to be exactly what the audience is expecting but also completely different from what they could possibly be looking for. And not scary. Not scary, except if they're expecting scary and you don't deliver scary,

they're going to be a little peeved. But if they're not expecting scary and you scare them, they're going to be like, whoa, and you might get a bigger reaction. So all these things are mutable. Yeah, big reaction from me, all right. Talk about scary. How about that mad baby in that one? Oh, God.

She's mad at... It's Will Ferrell in a scary movie. Oh, yeah. Well, you know what? That's... What's the story? The idea was, that was in the early days of the site, and they weren't really sure. I just seen it the other day. Yeah, well yeah well okay maybe you came i

mean that's the beauty of of content is it lives on the internet forever you might see it at any point but okay yeah this actually was released in the early days of the site it was part of its early viral success that's a that's a good answer that actually explains it that it was they came out in the early days of the site well yeah, yeah, but I had just seen it. I got you. And sometimes you give somebody, you know, you tell somebody that, and they think I'm lying or whatever. Or they go, well, it's old.

It's like, oh, really? Because I just have seen it. Gotcha. So anyway, that's a good answer. You actually did answer it. Go ahead. I'm sorry. Oh, no.

I was just going to. What happened with the, why did you do the baby? Well, the idea was it was like, let's, hey, we don't know if this, the funny or die thing is going to be about, it's about, is comedy the goal every time? Or sometimes are we looking for dies in the standpoint of we've really spooked our audience. We've really given them a chill and they're like, ah, die, you know, in the sense of I want this to go away because i got so scared yes so i mean that was in the early days we're kind of experimenting uh you know it was a big viral success so in in some sense it was that was great uh but in another sense from from the standpoint of like hey we don't want to give our audience thrills and chills we want to give them you know uh chuckles and guffaws from that standpoint we we sort of went in a different direction after that point

people i guess sending it around to their friends hoping to to to spook them and make them soil their drawers and we got a lot of uploads around that time of people's like like they were they were getting their friends reaction videos they're like hey check out this we're going to show you this spooky piece of content and we're going to show you this spooky piece of content, and we're going to be over their shoulder. And people would go crazy. They'd knock over their cubicle walls, or they'd soil themselves, or they'd break their computer monitors.

And that was a source of laughs. But also it was just there's so many lawsuits, people claiming damages and injuries as a result. And that's the ugly side of the internet sometimes, isn't it? That it can be used for a nasty trick. And you can have me click on something and say, whatever, here's your prize. And then when I click it, it's a nasty trick, a nasty surprise. Yeah, you think you're getting a free iPod.

You're like, lucky me. A guy won a free iPod and you click on it and it takes just... I've correctly identified the bosom or buttocks of what particular celebrity and I've clicked it and I am pleased with myself and then suddenly I'm punished for it. Yeah. When I do, when I'm on the site, I always think, if I hit die, that's not me, right?

Do you have a cold? Yeah. You took a big sniff just now. I was thinking about viruses. Okay. If I hit die, that's not me, right? No. I mean, that's not, unless it's your own piece of content

you know you're not voting die on yourself but it's not me die no it's not that you die i mean you know yeah let's let's hope not let's uh let's hope if you do die it's it's because you you laugh so hard that your your lungs jumped out of your mouth. Yeah, running down the street. Sure. Yeah. It's the guy who made it. He died. Yeah. You're saying that the kid, the uploader of the video,

the uploader of the piece of content, should die. Is gonna. Well, yeah. I mean, yes, they are going to die at some point. But mostly what you're individually saying is that I dislike this piece of content. We love internet.

One other internet thing that I feel like you do and you've told me so much is you are on Twitter doing tweets. And people talk about how to monetize Twitter. Yeah. On Twitter, doing tweets. And people talk about how to monetize Twitter. Yeah. Like, how do I turn this into a free website? The whole thing is free, and it's just typing words. How do you turn that into something where you make money? You know, without being a Kardashian. Right.

Which I'm so glad they wouldn't let her get a star on the Walk of Fame. I'm so glad when they turned her down. That would have sullied the whole Walk of Fame. The whole thing would mean nothing then. I'm so glad they stopped that because she tried to buy it. They all buy it, but she tried to do it and they stopped her. Imagine her being next to Cheryl Hines. Oh, that makes my skin crawl.

That makes my skin crawl. As far as I'm concerned, the Walk of Fame is for superstars like makeup artist Max Factor. Those are the kind of people who should have their names in those stone stars that people walk over and take pictures next to. I'm not a Kardashian. I'm certainly not a slut. Whoa. Okay, Hayes. I don't, yeah, let's avoid that. Well, she is.

Well, Hayes, that's neither here nor there. Well, I think she is. Okay. And what makes her that? You really want to talk about it? Let's get into it then. Well, I've seen just the way she looks on the show, You really want to talk about it?

Let's get into it. Well, I've seen the way she looks on the show, and I've seen how she is with men. I've seen things. And Nick, what do you have to say to that? I mean, this isn't a line of conversation I'm comfortable with. I think that she is— I think a few of us are uncomfortable. Yeah, whatever you want to say about her, she has made a name for herself.

I mean, we're talking about her right now, huh? Well, I do wish I... The show's got some good family values to it. And so it's not all negative, but it doesn't make her a star, not a superstar, on the level of, you know, the guy who wrote a song. Which is the one? The guy? Frankie Valli.

So, you know, there's different things that qualify you for the Walk of Fame, but we don't have to call her a word like that. If you're a world-class clarinetist like Artie Shaw, of course you belong on the Walk of Fame. But Kim Kardashian, what? She's got a reality show, but I'm not going to go so far as to impugn her character.

I'm just, that's not me. Well, I do wish I hadn't said it, but I'm not going to go so far as to impugn her character. That's not me. Well, I do wish I hadn't said it, and I do wish I could take it back, but that is how I secretly think about her. Well, she's doing, and I hate to say this, but she's just doing something in those videos that it seems like you watched that your own parents

did. Maybe think about that before you call someone a name like that. Well, you were saying you didn't like her the first time, so why don't you like her? I don't think she belongs on the Walk of Fame. Now, one of the many dogs that played Rin Tin Tin, that's famous. That's a star. But I don't think that she should be allowed in there.

But why? Because of the... Because of the... Dick sex. It sounds like, Sean, it sounds like you have a similar problem. You have a similar issue with it. You're just being more coy about it. Well, not everyone, you know, wants to.

Not everyone's so comfortable just talking about, you know, all this stuff that we sometimes see that I just feel like we shouldn't be seeing and you can't unsee it. And the way that you feel sometimes is like a lot of things, you know? Like you're jealous, but also you're confused and you are excited. I mean, it's exciting. And so, yeah, I got a lot of stuff around it and i don't necessarily think it doesn't make you a you know it doesn't make you a movie star and it doesn't make you

famous director and just makes you famous for just making me feel all this crazy stuff twitter twitter twitter sure yeah i mean how did you how how how to have money Twitter. Twitter. Twitter, sure. Yeah, I mean... How to have money? It's an excellent question. It's a really good question because that's the... You know, Twitter, it's free. I mean, some people are asking, how does the company itself make money? You know?

Because it's just content being... But it must. It's online. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. It's just content being circulated. But it must. It's online. Yeah. Well, the way that I make my big viral bucks via Twitter is I am a professional troll. I am a professional roaster of brands. So if someone needs a rival taken down, they'll come to me because they know I'm the king at it. They know that Frito-Lay's is like, hey, Tostitos, they're eating up too much market share.

This is Frito-Lay's. Our Doritos brand is suffering. We need you to take down Tostitos. And do you pwn them? I will pwn them i will pwn them i will go ahead and go online and i will tweet at tostitos and i will let them know exactly what i think about them in a comedic way that will really take them down to size and you know a lot of times just torpedo their brand you know that's that's like it's very tough to recover from at the hint of lime or the mini scoops or there's so

many avenues you know like i'll give you an example because this is i'm saying tostitos because this was a real thing please real thing i was commissioned for um so uh uh you know uh frito light came to me they said uh hey nick at nick weiger uh you and your legions of followers you know you have a lot of influence over them they're the younger generation they're going tostitos like we don't know like like they think they think doritos are for their their their grandparents for you know libtards like that's another thing i don't even want to get into but you know that we'll save that for that'll have to be a special two-part podcast i think we get into that um uh anyway uh politics aside for now even

though same page same page um, they're like, we need to go after the younger guys. Can you get some of your younger followers? Can you convince them that Tostitos are weak sauce, to use the parlance of the union. That they are fail. Ooh, I hope nobody's ever said

that about me. Ooh, weak sauce, was it? Weak sauce, yeah. Ooh, I hope nobody said that about me. Yikes weak sauce, was it? Weak sauce, yeah. Ooh, I hope nobody said that about me. Yikes. Ooh, that's a vicious one. You use that on them? Well, just don't get in my crosshairs. Oh, yeah, I'd rather not.

Because that's what I'm going to go to. And so then can they be a company anymore? Tostitos is no longer. Tostitos is no longer a company. As a rule, I'll tell you exactly what I did. I said I put a dot in front of my at reply. is no longer a company. I'll tell you exactly what I did. I said I put a dot in front of my at reply, which means that everyone can see it.

That's a big trick. It's like a secret little bomb. If you just put the at reply and you start with that, the only people who can see it are people who are already following whatever brand you're roasting. So you've got to put that dot there so every one of your followers sees it. That weaponizes the tweet. The chips and the salsa. Yeah, absolutely.

So I go dot at Tostitos. Hey, these are good chips. If I want something to feed to someone who's got no taste buds, hashtag fail. Hashtag weak sauce. Oh, no. Both of them. So then now anyone who wants to read about fails is clicking that hashtag, and now they're associating Tostitos with fail.

That's like that comes up. You click on the hashtag fail, first tweet, at Nick Weiger, roasting Tostitos. Oh, my God. Thousands upon thousands of retweets and faves. You know, top of my fave star consistently. And, you know, Tostitos is just like, we don't, you know, it's chaos. It's chaos. And they're done.

They're done. Off the record, Nick. And we'll edit this out. Sure. Do you miss, do you, Nick, do you miss Tostitos? Yeah. I mean, look. They're good.

They work. I'll openly admit it. I am a mercenary. All right? I am a – you know, I am a hired gun. I will – you know, I don't care. You know, it's like a political consultant who will work both sides. He'll work for the Republicans.

He'll work for the Democrats. You know, he'll go work in a... Republic creeps. Oh, yeah. Don't... Democrat. Don't get me started. Don't get me started.

You know, both sides, it's like, what, is this even a choice? Like, do we have no choice? There's only one that...

Is there even a choice? There's only one that has liberty in the name. Mm-hmm. Again, we're going to... This ought to be a special podcast.

No, I know, and we don't get into that on this show, but there's, you know, the choices. Can I just, does Anthony cue me a thing? Oh, yes. You could go to jail just for talking now? Yeah, I'm sorry. Is that what it is?

Just correct me if I'm wrong. I thought that's okay. Is that not what this is? I thought talking is fine. Is talking not okay now? You can go to jail? And you get stuck in jail now? I don't know.

I mean, I just, you know, I haven't read all of the Constitution, but I certainly read the First Amendment. It's first. Sure, it's the first one. The first one right up there. Yeah, usually the number one, they make it something pretty important when they do that. And I didn't read all of the First Amendment. I don't know all of it, but I know that the first thing it mentions is freedom of speech. I know there's a few other things it mentioned, but I think it's pretty.

A lot of times you leave with something that's pretty important. And speech, that's talking, right? Oh, okay. Well, then it seems like you shouldn't go to jail. Seems like it to me, yeah. Yeah. He's a, yeah, it's just, I don't even know what's going on if someone can say, you know, on their radio version of a podcast,

whatever you call that, if they're saying, they say something, and then they can be led away in handcuffs and be serving prison time. Yeah. That's what America is now. And stuck, trapped. You're stuck there. I took my serious box and I chipped it out of my console. Good for you.

With the back of a hammer, and now it's all sparking. Yeah. But that showed them. And I couldn't get mine out, but I just put a bunch of tape over it. So you can't see it, you can hear it, but it's unclear. Mm-hmm. Sure. And I covered it, and I think they are getting the message.

That showed them. I still have my serious box. That's okay. But I just wrote, I just got some stencils, and in front of it I put not so, not so serious. Oh, Nick. Yeah. Oh, no. That's a...

Oh, you're so butter. That was a roast that was on the house. Oof, I truly, oh, I do not want to cross this, man. I do want to play the Popcorn Gallery theme song real quick. We don't have any questions. We forgot to solicit questions for the Popcorn Gallery, but I think we probably should play the song. Do we want to play the Popcorn Gallery theme song?

Yeah, because, well, because we bought the rights to it from the person who wrote the song, and so now every time we play it on the podcast, we get a little cash because we have the publishing and that stuff. So I just figured we'd play the song and not do the questions. Okay, let's do it. Have you seen Welcome to Sweden, Nick? Popcorn.

No. Yum, popcorn. We did see it. Did you like it? Yeah, we liked it and we thought it was good. Did you see Romeo Must Die? Romeo Must Die. It's an older film. It's been out for a while.

Yeah, what happened in that? I can't remember. I feel like Romeo Must Die. I can remember the font from the poster. Is that Jet Li? Yeah, me too. Is that Jet Li? It was all jaggy.

Is Jet Li in that? Yeah. What happened in that? Oh, he's kicking everybody. He's so frigging pissed. Oh, God. You didn't see it? I did see it, but I forgot.

Is that what happens? Oh, he's kicking everybody. Kicking them in the stomach. Unreal. Nick, thank you so much for joining us today. A pleasure, an absolute pleasure. I mean, thank you for letting me speak about viral content. Thank you for giving the internet the respect it deserves as an artistic medium.

Well, we want you guys to stick around, and we like you guys being in the club, and it's a big tent. You've got our support. There's guys to stick around, and we like you guys being in the club. Thank you. It's a big tent. You've got our support. There's plenty to go around. Let me say this right here and now, and this is on the record. The internet is here to stay. Mark it down.

Mark it down. And that's the attitude, isn't it? Mm-hmm. Damn right. Did anybody buy the pro version this week? Yeah, I think a bunch of people did. But let's choose one. Well, first, will you ask our listeners to rate us on iTunes while I just do this? Yeah.

Anyone out there listening, thanks. And make sure to go ahead and rate the podcast on iTunes, whatever sort of star rating you want to give it. I mean, be honest. Be honest. Push the five. I think I would say five. I would give it five stars.

I think if you're giving it less than five stars, you're not. That's pretty sharp there. Also, one is bad. I would say if you're considering giving it one star, I would say don't even vote. Just move on. Just get out of there. Just go take a long walk.

Come back when you got your senses back and you're ready to vote for five. They should vote, yeah. You should vote for five. Tartan. Tartan. Yes, Tartan. Bought the pro version this week. And unfortunately, it was a negative prize this week.

We try to give them something positive that they can enjoy, but this week, because of the guest, Tartan is going to get roasted. Is about to get owned. And he will be owned and pwned by one Nick Weiger. Tartan. T-A-R-T-A-N. That's the name, you know. T-A-R-T-N. That's what I'm going after.

Gotcha. Hey, Tartan, out there, if you're listening, in whatever heap of garbage you live, I assume a burned out live. Oh, fuck. I assume a burned out car. Oh, shit. I assume you've been subsisting on gutter water and meal worms because you don't have a source of income. That's fucking gross.

That's sick. Do people do that? Let me just say this, Tartan. You're like Tarzan. Oh, no. I thought that happened. I wouldn't have said it. you're like Tarzan oh no I thought that but I wouldn't have said it instead of the Z

being in your name the Z is what's in my thought bubble because when I'm around you you make me want to go to sleep hashtag weak sauce

bye Oh! Hashtag weak sauce. Oh! Bye! Bye! This has been an Earwolf Media Production. Executive Producers Jeff Ulrich and Scott Aukerman. For more information, visit EarwolfRadio.com The wolf dead. That was a HeadGum Podcast.