Hollywood Handbook - Phil Rosenthal and Jon Gabrus, Our Travel Show Friends

Episode Date: June 14, 2022

Hayes talks to PHIL ROSENTHAL and JON GABRUS about their traveling food shows.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

this is a head gum podcast so i tell sean i booked phil i booked phil rosenthal for the show uh i've taken over bookings that kevin has been really stressed about these here he keeps talking fighting posters for his walls and shit he he he made posters for the january 6 hearings that he was gonna sell like outside of them i guess and they weren't trying to he tried to be non-partisan with them and not choose a side and it's like really fucking confusing it's like wearing a super bowl hat at the super bowl yes i bought the liz cheney one oh the collectible one the the foil hologram one that kevin made i didn't think anyone was gonna buy that one

and so and it just did not take sides the headline the like the big text at the top is just can you believe this yeah and it lets you decide what everyone is like i get it like honestly for everybody yes it's the don't look up of posters yeah you find your own metaphor in it so he's been really these are these were not even close to done in time. The renderings are still being done for these posters. Yeah, hopefully we don't hear in the background the sound of Kevin's computer processing it. Hopefully the mic's not picking that up. I know it's been rendering at 7% complete.

And so I tell Sean, you know, I booked Phil. And he says, oh, yeah, Phil, what's the Netflix show that has that show where he goes and eats food? And I said, somebody feed Phil. And he goes running off. Why? Sean is the type of friend, he will do anything you ask. And so he thought I was giving him an order which I almost never do

is that why he showed up at my house with food so tell me what he brought you because I know he was foraging a lot oh no there was just some old leaves okay and something that looked like not even good leaves

an animal of some kind maybe roadkill okay he said he thought that was like a rare mushroom yeah yeah no he needs to take a class he says he's self-taught he's a self-taught that i mean this that's so sean by the way you so sean he takes accidental commands to the fucking absolute limit like that's that has happened so many times i was like i he came up to me one time brought up so i forget what it was some idea for a script he had and it was really crazy outlandish and there was no way i was financing it so i just said go fly a kite this dude oh come on nearly electrocuted himself uh it was a lightning storm and you could make a lot of money with a friend like that let's talk about money finally

three of us have in common hollywood success welcome to hollywood handbook an insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names the red carpet linebacker hallways of this industry we call showbiz I'm Hayes Davenport I'm here with

Phil and co-host John Gabrus and our guest Phil Rosenthal Phil thank you so much for being here today what a pleasure Phil

always a pleasure to see you eat to see your world famous bite and smile at this point so glad it's back Phil, I believe on my travel show I call out a Phil Rosenthal impression when I try a foie gras dumpling

I can do it, it's like this I'm going to sip water instead of bite to do my Phil impression wow, he's really enjoying. You got like a meerkat energy when you try something you really like. You kind of like pop awake and then are like glancing around for predators or something. But like, it's it's pure joy watching you eat. I went to Lisbon and ate the same shit you did solely because of your show.

And I got fat. What the fuck, man? Don't say fuck. Oh, excuse me. Don't say shit. Don't say any of that. I gotta stop saying shit and fuck. It's like a big thing. Children watching. I have a loyal child following. Your resume, creator

of more recently I'll have what Phil's having and somebody feed Phil. Previously, everybody loves Raymond. people forget i think it's become it's like such a part of the canon now people forget how innovative it was at the time and that show was actually considered when it was first on the air very scary why this the yelling i don't think people were used to like i i guess like you you were so in it you didn't know how scared everyone was watching that show people had never seen yelling people like would cover their ears like people weren't used to like that much yelling

on on on tv it was a really scary show. I think Robert's deep voice really scared a lot of Americans. Everyone. Everyone got really scared. Did they not live at home with other people? You know, I think... Because that's where the stories were coming from. Our regular homes with regular

people, and that is the... You know, I thought we toned it down on the show compared to my house. I was just about to say, for home, a lot of people, home is scary for them. So like being reminded of home is triggering. And now it was coming out of the TV. It's funny. When I went to Russia to help the Russians, they asked me to go there. Exporting Raymond.

They asked me to go and turn mying Raymond. They asked me to go and turn my sitcom into Everybody Loves Kostya. And the only thing I said to them when I got there in my way of helping was to suggest that they try to keep it real, not real American, but real Russian. I wanted Russian people to relate to it so that it would seem like real life to them, right? And they were only used to doing very broad, sticky, over-the-top, cartoonish types of shows. And so when I suggested this, that we try to keep it more like real life, their answer to me was, life is terrible why would we put that on television valid point yeah russian the russians have a lot of good ideas and so kevin

when we like we always pull like a promotional clip for the show so we can just get phil saying what when i when i went to help the russians cut the thing about that he was going to help them with a show. What I told him? Just keep it real. Great. That's right. And they've listened to me ever since. Yes. Keeping it so real. Everyone criticizes them for this stuff. You can't deny they're keeping

it insanely real. I think exporting Raymond, if it was released today, it would do very well because, look, the Russians are back in the news. Yes. People searching Russia are like stumbling upon a comedy documentary. The punchline

of that whole story was that after I left, they did whatever they wanted. They didn't listen to me at all. And the show became... I actually, in the mail, I got a Guinness Book of World Record medal from the Guinness Book of World Records. That adaptation of Raymond in Russia is the single most successful adaptation of a show from another country in history. It's still running and has two spinoffs. And's not once a week the show it's five times a week

like a soap opera i don't understand it i i remember from the doc uh the writers or the creatives having a hard time understanding like the husband-wife dichotomy of like uh well no she would of course have to do the chores or whatever. And I was like, oh man, watching you articulate what's funny about Raymond to those people and they're like, we don't even have the same foundation for setup.

Forget punchlines. We can't even land on similar setups. Except that what I learned was that they were not telling you the truth, that that is what they would like it to be. They would like to pretend that men are in charge and women do whatever we say. It's not true. And I can feel this becoming a high and mighty.

I could feel Gabrus kind of like getting too comfortable in the host role. Yeah, I can feel that happening too and that's fine it's not your fault i had asked kevin to sort of intervene when that happens to just kind of like pull the plug say that there was like yeah say that there was like a zoom issue communicate with gabriel off air yeah yeah i've been ignoring all these texts from kevin that are yeah like if you could just shut your camera and mic off right now it's not happening i'm sorry when you hire me you hire me for a reason i'm filling in for sean big shoes to fill i'm trying my fucking best here

hayes i'm sorry okay again he's cursing oh fuck my bad and really bad stuff too really like bad cursor some of it's gonna rub off on me kevin can you put the f word over those really bad stuff, too. Really bad cursor. Some of it's going to rub off on me. Kevin, can you put the F word over those really bad cursors I accidentally said in post? Can you just fix it so it sounds like the F word? I'm very impressionable. That's the last thing we want is, Phil, you taking some of this bad attitude I have out into the world. Let's talk about rubbing off on each other. Oh, okay.

John Gabrus also has a show. Yes. Where he goes around the world. Yeah. You know, everyone has to watch him. I've been told I rub people the wrong way, like frequently. Yeah. Collaborators.

Yes, it's up and down. Up and down. Yeah. I'm doing the wrong way. I'm going east-west. You don't want to be going east-west. This is terrible. Come on.

You have a show. Yes, Phil has been rubbing off on me, is what you were saying. Talk about your inspiration. Talk about your show. Talk about what inspired you to do a show where you have fun and everyone else has to be subjected to it who are you talking to now let's start with phil because some of his answers may rub off on me good he's more experienced more well versed in this i finally just got uh my dream job but

you know due to mergers i have no idea if anyone will ever see it. So Raymond ended in 2005 and right away I started in with other sitcoms to sell and nobody wanted any of them. And for years, I'm just writing pilots, writing pilots, and they're sending me

pilots for me to run. I don't want any of them and they don't want any of mine because the business had changed in the nine years that we were doing that R show. Meaning, everything they wanted, just carbon copies of Friends, it seemed like. Or Sex and the City. And these weren't, they're not what I do. Right? Nothing wrong with those shows.

It's just not my sensibility and not what I'm good at. So they didn't want from me and I didn't want from them. And then I had this idea, this dream idea that started back during the Raymond days when we did a show in Italy. And Raymond, you know, I saw Ray really transform, not just in the script that I wrote, a guy who didn't like traveling and suddenly got woke on the trip and then suddenly understood the magic of travel. I saw it happen to Ray Romano, the person, when we filmed. And that's when the light bulb, whoa, I would love to do that for other people, right? So this is always in the back of my mind as I keep striking out in the world of sitcoms after Raymond. But let me tell you, when you walk

into a major talent agency that knows you only as the sitcom guy who had some success, and you tell them, you know what I'm going to try now? A food and travel show. They look at you as if you just pooped on their desk. So they were not going to help me. They did not want this idea from me. They thought I was insane, and it took me 10 years to get the show. Wow. So when people say, oh, you're just doing what you love. Yes, now I am, but look at the road it took to get there. Nothing is easy. Yes, this is a dream job. Was it worth the 10 years? I would say yes, because now I'm very, very happy.

People say, oh, you look so happy. Are you always that happy? I am when I'm doing that show. Who wouldn't be? Now, do you feel your body could have handled it better if they greenlit it 10 years ago? Yes. I'm feeling every bit of my party travel show. I was like, if I got this show when I was 32,

I think I'd live through it. Now at 40, I don't know what the other side of this looks like. By the way, that's the message. Go while your body can still handle it. Go. Like, go now. You will never be as young as you are right now. That's what I said. Go while you can still hike up the mountain. Go while you can still, you know,

party a little bit. Go while you can still eat the food. You don't want to be old man and being wheeled around on the beautiful sights. I mean, it's better than nothing, but you'd like to have some mobility when you travel. So you'd like to eat two kilos of prosciutto without passing. That's right. Like you want to eat all the great stuff. You want to have the body to do it. So that also means taking care of yourself a little bit when you're not doing that.

So the biggest question I get, always the number one question, how am i not 400 pounds because i don't do that when i'm not doing that and i also you're seeing you're also there's a trick we're filmed for a week in a place and you're seeing it condensed into less than an hour so yes i look like people don't understand that people think everything is in real time they think they're it's happening inside the tv while they're watching it you just cannot explain to the a lot of people are begging together begging for the behind the scenes

of you on a ducati motorcycle shooting to the next location at 110 miles an hour to get the bite in while there's a b-roll transition like they just can't wrap when you see the scene where i eat a lot i am eating a lot but that's all i ate that day you know how they make a dog food commercial they don't feed the dog until the commercial and i'm the dog i don't eat until that scene and'm the dog now I mean you know you gotta this should be like a union show you should be getting a lunch

it should be a union show I agree I wish mine was because then I guarantee health insurance we stop for the crew we must that is very important you're not allowed to eat I can join them if I want but it would be pretty stupid crew we must that is very important but you're not allowed to eat you're not allowed to eat in the

i can join them if i want to be pretty stupid i feel the same way your appetite on on the crew look by the way and the crew lunch is usually at one of the restaurants that we're filming in and they eat fantastic well and if you watch the show you see that i don't finish anything i share with them now phil that is something my co-host adam pally and i stole from you we feed because also you're sitting there eating like wagyu beef and you're like getting full and the sound guy has got a single tear coming out of that's right and you're like oh fuck josh you want a slice of this shit you know so you you want a slice of this steak i apologize apologize. That's right. Very nice. You toss it in the air.

I toss it in the air. If he doesn't catch it, it lands on the floor. Let them fight over my dog. Well, you know, you've done this. My question is, like, why stop with just, like, going around the world and, like, eating exotic foods? What about, like, what about smelling? What about like going around the world and like smelling exotic, like very fine things from around the world,

like very unique smells. Yeah. Oh, that's somebody sniff Phil. That would be a great show for you. I agree. How's your olfactory? Is it still,

I know you're kind of popular for it back in the days. It's still going. I'm known as the guy who eats the food. You can be the guy who smells. Well, again, I don't want to stop there. I'm going to be touching things as well. Oh, shit. Okay. I'm going to be touching all manner of things that you can only find in exotic

locations. Oh, you mean the X-rated version? Well, I mean... Is it exotic or erotic locations it's x for it's x for exotic okay god i'm sure there are sites on the xx that would love a show like that are you hoping people are watching your show haze and going fuck i gotta get to gibraltar and feel that rock i gotta smell and feel that rock i smell and feel it at the same time and then you describe it sniffing for italy with hayes davenport eating better is easy with factors delicious ready to eat meals every fresh never frozen

meal chef crafted dietitian approved ready to go in just two minutes speaking of ready to go in just two minutes chef kevin is here with his new show the chef kevin factor where he creates fresh never frozen meals now this is different kevin i just want to i just want to establish it's none of this like here's a like a pile of ingredients like this is the meal the meal has to be ready it's not a recipe okay this is the meal you cook the full meal for us now okay yeah you don't just send us a bunch of stuff you had laying around in your cabinet you're actually doing the cooking and there are 35 different options

to choose from every week, including Calorie Smart, Protein Plus, and Keto. Which is this? It's a little bit of all of them. Okay. Okay, it shouldn't be. There are also more than 60 add-ons to help you stay fueled up

and feeling good all day long. How many add-ons? And what are some of them? It's one big add-on, and it's you on your bed you're so tired after you eat my meal the at the promises the meal makes us sleepy you've been pushing that so much you're saying that you will be added on to your bed yeah your bed plus one that's the opposite of what this is supposed to do it's supposed to help you stay a lot of these i know

give you a ton of energy they have have smoothies and things like that. Reservation for two, me walking in my bedroom. What's the second? It's you in your bed? The bed. I guess Clippy. Fuel up fast with Factor's restaurant-quality meals that are ready to heat and eat wherever you are. Pancake, smoothies, and more.

Discover a wide variety of easy options for the entire day, like breakfast, midday bites, and more. This is not even up for consideration. So let's just hear what the actual meal was. What was the food? I don't want to go to bed. It's very simple. It's one huge chicken nugget. Sign up and save. We've done the math.

Factor is less expensive than takeout. Every meal is dietitian approved to be nutritious and delicious. Head to factormeals.com slash theboys50 and use code theboys50 to get 50% off. That's code theboys50 at factormeals.com slash theboys50 to get 50% off. Be a better you in 2024 with Babbel, the science-backed language learning app that actually works. Don't pay hundreds of dollars for private tutors or waste hours on apps that don't really help you speak the language. And the question that I always get, people stop me and they say like, hey, I trust you. I know when you endorse a product, it's something that you really use and care about.

But there's one language that I'm trying to learn, and that's body language. Can Babbel teach me body language? Yes. Babbel now has visual in-person lessons. Part of their quick 10-minute lessons that they do for other languages, handcrafted by over 200 language experts to help you start speaking a new language in as little as three weeks Babbel is designed by real people for real conversations

and that includes body based conversations what does it mean when you drop someone off after a nice date and they turn around at the door and they take their little index finger and they kind of like draw it towards them. They're pulling it.

What does that mean? Does their finger hurt? I wonder if they spotted a spider web or something. They're trying to pull down the spider web. Yeah. But I've seen this too after a lot of dates and I need and have needed something like babble to figure out what the heck is this person doing with their finger because it looks like a it looks like an emergency

i know i'm supposed to do something or how about those people that stand in the street they're kind of like they've got like almost like police clothes on it may be almost yeah and they're standing in the middle and as i'm driving and i'm cruising they're holding their hand up for like a high five almost and they're really aggressively like pushing it out i'm like am i supposed to drive get out of the car yes or just do it out the window as i'm going that's what i've been doing dangerous yeah but some of these very subtle body language cues have escaped me and many listeners i'm sure babbles tips and tools are approachable accessible rooted in real life situations at which i have all the time and delivered with conversation-based teaching so you're ready to practice what you've learned in the real world.

Studies from Yale, Michigan State University, and others. Can't feel good to be others there. Continued to prove Babbel is better. One study found that using Babbel for 15 hours is equivalent to a full semester at college. Babbel has over 60 million subscriptions sold. All of their 14 award-winning language courses are backed by their 20-day money-back guarantee. Here's a special

limited-time deal for our listeners. Right now, get 55% off your Babbel subscription, but only for our listeners at Babbel.com slash the boys. Get 55% off at Babbel.com slash the boys, spelled B-A-B- E-L dot com slash the boys. B-A-B-E-L dot com slash the boys.

B-A-B-B-E-L. B-A-B-B-E-L. B-A-B-B-E-L. Dot com slash the boys. Rules and restrictions may apply. With Babbel, we can't promise it'll always be easy, but you'll always be glad you did it. Kind of like this podcast, except it is easy for me. Hey, guys. Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, but you'll always be glad you did it. Kind of like this podcast, except it is easy for me.

Hey guys, Rocket Money is a personal finance app that finds and cancels your unwanted subscriptions, monitors your spending, and helps lower your bills. You can see all your subscriptions in one place, and if I see something I don't want,

I can cancel it with a tap. I never have to get on the phone with customer service. The subscriptions are insidious. They're the scourge of our modern life, and you never realize what you're subscribing to or that you're still being charged. I know that I was about 19 dresses into receiving each one of the 27 dresses from the movie 27 dresses before I found out how much it was costing yes that they intended to send me by the way you'll this will shock you 54 dresses if i did not cancel and i you know oh that one's got an end point by like dress 14 15 i think it starts to become clear like these aren't the dresses oh no they were not from the movie they didn't resemble anything from the movie they were not

they were either way too big or way too small for a human to wear yeah and one of them was a dressing yeah one of them was it was it was a vinaigrette it was a raspberry vinaigrette it was a french raspberry vina colada dressing. They'll even try to get you a refund for the last couple months of wasted money and negotiate to lower your bills for you by up to 20%. All you have to do is take a picture of your bill, and Rocket Money takes care of the rest. They have over 5 million users and have helped save its members an average of $720 a year with over $500 million in canceled subscriptions.

And that was, I mean, just to be fully transparent, that $500 million, most of that was the dresses. Well, yeah. I mean, you're talking about Hollywood memorabilia. You're talking about ornate gowns in some cases. And so that was costing me a lot, a lot, a lot, a lot. Stop wasting money on things you don't use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to rocketmoney.com slash the boys. That's rocketmoney.com slash the boys.

Rocketmoney.com slash the boys. Hollywood handbook. Oh, I have a pitch for you, Phil, because you've done this, you know, you've done your dream show now. So now here comes a nightmare. The like friends and sex in the city thing, I get it's not your sensibility and that's fine. Friends and sex in the city. Friends in the city?

Three men, seven women. All white. All white. The three men are in their 20s. three of the women are in their 20s the four other women are of a certain age and they all they're that's the show like that's the group they're all friends and sex of the city with each other and it's all new york again sounds great for you to do i don't have time i'm i'm smelling and touching my why don't you combine this my palms are raw why don't you combine the smelling and touching with this idea and they all touch each other

yeah i'm glad you went to smell and touch because i know you're for the the pilot's original premise was looking and so you found you you found yourself describing what things looked like to people who could see it on camera yeah in fact i think it should be called smelling and touching friends in the city smelling and touching colon friends in the city i love it oh you smell like such a miranda it's like stuff what people are going to start saying to each other or hey wait a minute you smell like miranda where have you been well gabrus maybe you could ask phil for you know i don't know if the show's coming back you told me to you told me to like lay off asking questions to make it

seem like you know so you want this is no but no no no no no i said you get out of host mode host mode for you is not asking questions no it's just me talking over to be fair host mode's a lot like guest mode don't let anyone else talk who cares what the premise of the episode is yes yeah i'm familiar gabers is a good interviewer he can knows what to do oh how interesting i've been on that couch in this case i want to make sure because i've heard things about his show like you know with the merger and everything like i are you talking about you're hoping that the discover brothers platform carries my show for because you're a cord cutter so you can watch it on discover brothers i'm just hearing uh you know the axes

like who knows where it will fall next so in order to maybe secure the deal if you go to them with a really compelling pitch for the next season different places you could go different things you could eat maybe we could maybe we could seal the deal on this thing maybe phil can help maybe phil has recommendations on like places that like you and your friend we have yeah we have we have a hundred could party but could party before you die 101 places to party before we die or before you die before one dies i guess is the sort of subtext of the title. We went to eight places in the first season, which hopefully will air and people will watch Thursday nights on True TV.

But what is this? July 14th is our premiere. I'm going to watch. Oh, thank you, Phil. And then you hear that from me that says, stay out of my lane. from me that says stay out of my lane uh it's it's insane to be doing like it feels crazy right you feel like how is it like this is what if i got a job what i would do on my time off is travel and eat food and drink and now you're doing it for your job it feels really like i feel like I'm scamming someone and I'm afraid someone's going to find out. And be like, no, you're supposed to be a ditch digger and just shove me back to there or something. I'd be afraid that nobody's going to find out. I mean, that's always a possibility. If I were you.

Where did you go? Tell us some of the places you went on your eight trips. We went to all American places. on your eight trips we went to all american uh places uh so we went to uh maui moab uh wow san juan uh miami uh denver richmond uh and portland i that might be eight i got an atlanta that's eight there we go can't do a turner show without going to Atlanta. Of those on our show, we've only been to Portland, so it'll be fun to compare. Did you go to Portland, Oregon or Portland, Maine? Portland, Oregon.

You went to Portland, Maine. You went to Portland, Maine? Oh, hell yeah. In this season, we go to Portland, Oregon and Portland, Maine. Yes. The shows that are on right now. Oh, that's awesome. I enjoyed Portland. Isn't it great?

How about those food pods? What's a food pod? Oh my god. He didn't do the food pods. Well, I did. The entire episode there, they didn't do the food pods. I'm going to take your license away. Oh, shit.

Oh my god. His license to party has been revoked oh yes yes yes that's what that's what it's called okay now i know yeah i learned the lingo man i gotta get with the link my show is we're definitely not helpful as hosts like you're a good host and explaining this is like a food that's famous here and it's good what's the premise of your show you get high and eat yeah we get high and get drunk and eat and then do dumb activities it's this sounds terrible it's oh it's terrible for other people to watch i don't understand what who may want to watch but it's amazing to shoot it's just i can't imagine who who gives a fuck but i also watch strangers make ceviche all the time so maybe you know like

everyone likes dumb shit i like travel shows are what i lived on for so long especially in the pandemic so to find to get to do one feels like adding to a market that i love so much i feel like i feel like a little kid who's getting to throw a football to Michael Irvin or something. I'm just like, I get to come out here on the field and be like, I also am doing something like this. And everyone's kind of laughing. Stanley Tucci shoves me and Padma spits on me. It's exactly how I feel. Aren't I the luckiest guy in the world? So good for you. So you got in there. What should he do? So say they come back

to him and say, all right, look, the show's coming back. It's now called 16 Places to Party Before You Die. You think it was a little presumptive to have that name for our show? Is that a little bit of a calling shot? I think it's a great idea. I mean, I don't know. The name of the show, we got to do the name of our show is that like a little bit like a great idea like a little it's a great idea i mean i don't know well the name of the show we got to do the name of the show

it's a little presumptive about how long you're you're gonna live that's fair to be fair i yeah not only do we need them to pick up cycles it needs to happen fast so where should he go season two they get they get eight episodes they get six of them are still going to be in America and they get one episode where they travel to a place two different locations but they can drive

between those locations Jesus Christ did you like talk to the UPM of the show the shit you're saying is the shit the exact as someone knows how to cut corners they're not gonna pay for two separate international no we're going to europe for two weeks and it's a train ride between cities i would i have a suggestion where you should go i'm listening keeve keeve in oh have you gotten there on your show no i'm not crazy

you go i will if it means a second season i will go to keeve and i will be not tell anyone that i just started pronouncing it as Keeve this year very safe for the crew to be running around Keeve with something shoulder mounted I'm sure that'll show up very clearly on the drone oh no no it's okay it's a

God willing that place will be okay and they will you, clear those bums out of there, and I'll go. Yeah. I would love nothing more than to support that country. That would be fantastic. I was just suggesting to Gabrus

that he go now. Yes. Okay. Exactly. What's up? Welcome back to 101 Places. We are fighting with the Citizen Army on... See, but you're young enough. You can do this. What's up? Welcome back to 101 Places. We are fighting with the Citizen Army on Batman. See, but you're young enough. You can do this. I still got it. I still have what it takes to be good. How about that fabulous

Bourdain show where he was in Beirut when they started attacking and they had to get out for the thing, right? I'm not doing that. I'm not that guy. I'm not brave. I'm not an adventurer.'m the opposite i need i need a hotel with a bed with a pillow you know i want to be a little comfortable you're so high maintenance you demand a bed and a pillow on set your ride must be wow what a rider yeah the pa is like, Phil needs a pillow in his hotel room, like rolling his eyes.

He says he needs water in the car if you expect him to shoot in the desert. I represent all the other people out there who are exactly like me. They do not want to risk their lives for entertainment. I repelled a waterfall in the finale of our show. How'd you do? I did. I succeeded. I lived.

I look like an absolute... I'm screaming that I hate it and I don't want to do it. Up there, I also ride a horse in one episode and I was equally terrified of that. I rode a camel. You ever ride a camel? I have not.

It's brutal. Who designed this as a form of transportation? You sit on there. First of all, a camel hates you, doesn't want you on it, and is braying and doesn't want to. They have handlers to make them kneel so you can get on the damn thing. The thing hates you. And then as you're walking, I'm punching in the air one fist at a time boom boom boom on your undercarriage that's what it feels like this is not a pleasant you've done it i've never done it because they

were genetically engineered to not have me sit on them they they created this yes this thing to say, this is not for you to sit on. But how does a camel smell and feel, Hayes? Oh, yeah. I won't ride it. I'll smell it. I'll touch every inch of it. Touch it. Sir, we don't need it.

Not every inch, please. Let me tell you something. Cut, cut, cut. Second to riding it is smelling it. Horses don't smell great either while we're on it yeah and riding them also not so you know if you're self-conscious about your size or weight if you've broken a couple of chairs in mixed company because you're 295 pounds and people go i swear that's if you broke your friend ben rogers couch and had to buy him a new one uh then you might be and then they're like this is

boudreaux climb on and i'm like i he doesn't want me on him he doesn't want anyone and he certainly is not like give me the biggest one like i i don't want to i feel so i'm sitting on his back i'm like i get it i don't want to be up here you don't want me here get me the hell why don't you just put another horse on me yes i'll carry you boudre. Sit on my back and I'll walk around with you and take a super long piss when you don't want me to. I have a tip for you guys. Yes. Because you, you're Phil, I'm sure still not used to it. You're the star now.

You know, you're. Big star. You're the on camera talent. Huge. You're used to being behind the camera. I worked on a show with a major star whose name i will not reveal do it but but could be wendy the snapple lady could be one of the cast of uh friends uh that smell friends having sex in the city smelling and touching got it

or are you saying that that the star of your show was in sex in the city one of those ten people could be one of those ten people and her producer came to us came to us one day and said

hey so there was a vanilla candle in her trailer like we don't like you should know but like she doesn't do that she doesn't do vanilla candle and she wants Gwyneth Paltrow's hoo-ha right which is now now which is reading his writer that's french vanilla and so marching plan but then she comes along all these people get in trouble they're all a little scared and then she comes along and she's like guys it's fine i heard that there was an issue with the candle the candle's great i have no it like that whole thing. Like, that's not a big deal at all. Like, don't, don't worry about any of that. So now everyone loves her,

but how else did this come up? Somebody, they're playing good cop, bad cop with the crew. Yeah. I might, I might take a page out of Cynthia Nixon's book. There.

I might take a page out of Cynthia Nixon's book there. I know your resume, Hayes. A legendarily beloved. I don't know who told you that. You have your team lay ground fire before you roll up. Oh, yeah. And then you show up. Guys. Oh, I don't know why you guys

everyone's walking on eggshells. I fucking chill. Take the cuffs off. Release them. Let go. There had to have been a moment where they got the fucking vanilla candle in my trailer.

You know, they're like, there's no other way. How else would it come up? She didn't make that up. These are the big problems. You know, when you don't have big problems, you take the little ones and make them big. That's why you get this behavior, this entitlement.

You know, I think it's why someone, forget whatever other reasons were going on in his head, the only thing this man, Will Smith, has to apologize for is his entitlement. The fact that he thought the crowd would not only think it was okay, but love that he got on the stage when someone else was talking, let alone hit the man. That's, you're seeing entitlement. That's the only thing that he when he comes on the when he does his oprah interview if he doesn't apologize for that i don't want to hear anything well this is kevin's big thing like you know kevin always has like a big speech he likes that

wants to make about this stuff and like almost every episode he wants us to carve out time where uh he can talk about the will Smith thing. Kevin, go ahead. What's your... He disagrees with you on this, Phil. He does? No. I have a new poster out. This is a perfect time to announce it. That just says

The Slap. That's it. It's not taking a side on The Slap? No. It just says The Slap. It is selling like hotcakes. There's a link in the description if anyone wants it. And it's just like... It's not taking a side on the slap? No, it just says the slap. And it is selling like hotcakes. And so there's a link in the description if anyone wants it. But you got a cease and desist from NBC, right? NBC's the slap. Yeah.

Zachary Quinto is suing me. Yeah. So those are really late. Yeah. Do you know what peak entitlement is? You know what behavior drives me crazy? Is when someone complains about something that bothered them, it gets fixed. Like in a minor way, like restaurants or at work or something, and it gets fixed.

It's like, God damn it. You know, the soda machine's always broken. Someone's like, the next day it's fixed. That person who's like, could you believe yesterday the soda machine was broken? And you're like, can you believe he fucked up my order? It's like, yeah, but you got the new fresh order. Yeah, where it's like, I just can't get out of the headspace. Like, trapped in there.

Like, I can't believe they gave me the dish with peanuts. It's like, yeah, but they took it away and gave you back the dish without peanuts. And you're going to be okay now. And it's like, nope, I want to stay complaining because complaining is what we do. And that's when you realize someone's just choosing to be mad in that moment. Yes. Of all the choices you can make, you're just going to choose to be pissed while we're out to dinner. I will not sit here while you denigrate my people.

The complainers. Yes. So, Phil, what's next? What do we... I'm going to lie down. Next season, is you lying down? Yes. Somebody tuck Phil in.

The show's still called Somebody Feed Phil, but it's like more desperate sounding. Somebody feed Phil. That's right. I'm just lying down there. I'm just laying there. I like the title because it denotes a guy who can't take care of himself

like a dog. It's one of the great titles. And it's part of the structure that you built, which is blank buddy verb guy. That's right uh and theme song somebody love phil somebody please please can we get somebody to love phil and you know who's saying that usually my wife oh gosh uh phil did you have travel show inspirations when you were uh or do you make yeah of course

right no reservations and all the other board say say rick steves is a big listener if you just like give a little shout out to rick steves i just i don't i don't want to get an email from him i always say i'm i'm just like rick steves without the intelligence or the sex appeal. Yeah. I'm only like Rick Steves in that I also like weed. I heard that. Rick Steves, big proponent of legalizing cannabis and travel. Those are two of my favorite things in the world. You know, he doesn't look the type. You should never judge someone by how they look because he's, I guess, really, really

cool. I guess, really, really cool. Yeah. I look like I have to look... You look like the guy in the box. A guy at Morimoto in

Maui called me Low Rent Matty Matheson. We were filming a dinner scene and... Oh, God. Yeah, I know. I was like, thank you. We were curs a dinner scene. And I know it's like, thank you. We were cursing a little bit in what we were. We were talking. We're just because as you've heard,

vulgar mouth. And that's on the show. You're cursing too. Well, I think they'll be bleeping it. But yeah, we're, we're cursed.

It's, you know, we got real. Like you told the Russian writers. Yes. Keep it real. Keep it real. A woman comes over and says we're dining with our daughter over there could you just and your language is blah blah blah and

we're i was like oh so sorry we will keep it down her daughter's like 12 and then she starts walking back and her husband is sitting there next to the door. He's like, fuck it. And he screams, fucking low rent, Maddie Matheson. And I just turned. I go, wow, I can't curse in front of your daughter, but you can act like this at like a crowded resort restaurant. And then the producers all had to come in. You know, it got like a little real house. Wow. It sounds like that show that was set in the Maui Hotel.

What was that show for? White Lotus. White Lotus? White Lotus. Kevin! Sorry. White Lotus. Sounds like a scene from White Lotus. He's going to come and poop in your luggage.

Fingers crossed. Phil, what's next? I don't want to fill in for you, but book? Yeah. Oh, the book is coming. Book coming. you but book yeah oh the book is coming book coming so the book is it's called somebody feed fill the book you can already pre-order and it comes out in october are you concerned that people are going to try and feed you the book it could happen i didn't put a comma i don't want to i know it's late i don't know where the book is and it's

pressing but somebody read phil is right there read Yeah, no, we're not doing that. Okay, tagline. Tagline, it's a good caption. How about just a tweet? Can you give me? Maybe the next book. All right. I like that.

You should have called it Phil's first book. It has 60 recipes from the first four seasons that the viewers requested, The most requested recipe. So at the very least, it's an excellent cookbook. Oh, that's awesome. And... Yeah?

Just again, I could feel Gabrus trying... Like, again, this is... He wants to interrupt. No, I apologize. Hayes, you were saying something. It started with and really loudly. Podcast. Podcast. Getting in the game. I loudly so podcast like a podcast getting a podcast

like you welcome to the family lunch yes lunch with my friend david wild and we interview the stars of the day and it's really fun and we eat lunch while we do it and we're naked we we got together the podcasting community we We said, excited to have Phil and David. This is the last one. No more. No more. I agree with you. I'm closing the door behind me.

Yes. I am not help. I am the ladder for those who come behind me is being drawn up. It's pulled up. With me. We're pulling up the ladder of podcasting. The helicopter is taking off. From Saigon.

Anyone who's hanging onto the skids, we break their fingers. They're going to fall. I like this idea. I think there's too many also. Indeed. I'm just happy you're not watching old episodes of Raymond and getting paid off of it again. I'm just happy you are doing something new in podcasting. I feel like TV stars are coming back and watching their own shows.

Oh, no, that I do on my own late at night, really pathetically. Yeah, I've gotten some of your crying voicemails about what you're watching. You know, I'm scraping the bottom of the mac and cheese pot from the craft mac and cheese and i watch old raymond that's what i do so i i know you know the dough boys you did an episode of the dough i love the dough boys yeah i haven't heard of them if you just want any tips on like eating on a show i did an episode of the doughboys where i ate 69 shrimp uh the sonic experience for the listener there's just like certain ways to like in certain foods that you eat shrimp is one of them that like is very pleasurable for a podcast listener to hear and it's it's a um

it's a it's an effect where like the more shrimp you eat the more like the better it sounds it's an effect where the more shrimp you eat, the better it sounds. It's exponentially pleasurable. It's because it's a soft, chewy thing? Yeah, it's not that soft the way I eat it. With the shell? Which is tail first? I eat it with the shell on.

So crack, crack, crack. My teeth are connecting a lot yes so it sounds pleasant yeah so i i do a lot of i do a lot of episodes where i eat jars of peanut butter with a head cold uh people seem to really like the way that sounds just kind of a stuffy nose jar of almond butter going down i'm doing a show where everybody has a straw and a cup and there's three drops left in the cup and that's all you hear. Where can

we find... Do we have a network for Naked Lunch? Is this self-produced? It's Stitcher, but it's everywhere you can get podcasts. It's on there. Where do people hear this? Kevin is trying to get it uh posted to the

internet really soon um so but for now it's playing in small venues and right now we're just handing tapes out cassette tapes out on the corner of melrose and hey you like podcasts you like a podcast you like a podcast hey podcast hey podcast hey podcast at the ballgame hey podcast yeah i'll take two episodes of the flagrant ones right and they fucking whip it down to you and the jewel case hit your hand real hard what happens they throw it from far away you should do somebody feel about this where you just, where you get the peanuts thrown to you from really far away. By the time you get over there, you ate the peanuts. Yes.

Now they want money. You say you didn't know. You're like a network executive. You're trying to save money on... You say, I don't have any money. You didn't say it cost money. I can see you wearing a button that says $11.50. I couldn't see that.

You threw it to me from so far away. And then he wants $5. So what I do is he's far away, so I throw $5. But I don't curl it up or anything. I just throw it. It lands at my feet. And then I said, tried. You tried. You pick it up. Somebody drop this going once, my feet. And then I said, tried. And then I pick it up and run.

Somebody drop this going once, going twice. Put it right in your pocket. That's how you do it, people. I didn't make money from nothing. This is smart business sense. Bye. Hollywood Handbook. That was a HeadGum Podcast.