Hollywood Handbook - Reggie Watts, Our Spooky Friend

Episode Date: November 19, 2018

REGGIE WATTS joins The Boys to prepare for the Hollywood Handbook Haunted House.This episode is sponsored by Harry's ( www.harrys.com/HOLLYWOODHANDBOOK ), Robinhood ( www.HANDBOOK.robinhood.com ), and Quip ( www.getquip.com/THEBOYS ).See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Podcast. So, it's getting late, obviously, and I'm in there with Steve Forbes and Jim Downey. It's the night before Steve's going to host SNL, and we still don't have a cold open. Ugh. Now, we know we've got to do something with the flat tax. Yes. But what? host SNL and we still don't have a cold open. Now we know we gotta do something with the flat tax. Yes. But what? And of course Steve's pitches

are all like maybe we could explain how good it would be for the American people. Right. Jim's going flat Stanley. There's something there. I was thinking that exact thing. Is there a way to bring out, like to have Nora come out

and like she's flat or something? It's hard to figure out. Yeah, yes. And we went through that. And then also, maybe it's something that Toonsis ran over is flat. Okay. Mr. Bill. Mr. Bill.

Mr. Bill. Mr. Bill gets very flat. And so all of these are on the table. Steve keeps shooting them down. And of course, we try to honor what the host wants. Mr. Bill would have to become flat. He'd go, hey, that's really... Okay!

That felt great. Yeah, that, yes. So... that felt great um yeah that yes so none of this is really cold open or wait it doesn't yes i think you're not saying you're saying cold open it's cold open yeah okay yeah this is one of the times where we're going let's just have the host do the cold open as a monologue get it cold open as a monologue get it the mom i love it yes what those are the best episodes but ultimately i just go look give the people what they want let's just let steve riff so we put him out there with nothing watch him cook virtuoso performance wow and when we get right to the moment of truth where he's gonna bring up tft he goes the flat tax and there's like an echo underneath it and man the fucking building lost its mind just him him saying it. A lot of babies made that night

in New York City, I'll tell you what. Hey, welcome to Hollywood Handbook Insider's Guide to Kicking Button Dropping Names. In the red carpet lineback hallways in this industry we call showbiz. It's showbiz. And it's showbiz, baby. Hollywood Handbook. What up, what up? We got a guest.

We have a guest. We got a guest. It's a corker in fact i uh how you feel about that like imagine doing this show in like an empty field with like no structure built around us no mics no machines because we would have no money to buy them and that's a world that we would be living in if not for reggie watts who built this house yeah yeah but come i put down some stuff into it yeah that's right yeah the entire structure the whole foundation was laid yeah and without a solid foundation a house cannot stand no it this this house will not stand this one oh oh so you're telling me now the foundation's not solid?

Oh, no, no, it is. But if there wasn't a foundation, it just will not stand. No, it won't. It won't. It just will not. And I wouldn't stand for it either. Oh, I'd be sick to my stomach to see someone try to make a house with no foundation. And this is actually the first time we are spending time together, but we are best friends because there is a cardboard standee of you and Scott that has accompanied me through my Earwolf journey from the other Hollywood office to this one.

To the one upstairs from here. To the other one. Long, long ways away. All the way down here. And the cardboard cutout has been there the whole time. And I've spent more time with you than with any member of my family.

Wow, that's really cool. And I've enjoyed the time more. Whoa. You think about that. That's the important part. When you first started talking to me, I was like, oh, that's cool. But then like that you first started talking pleasure I was like oh that's cool but then like

of course they won't hear that so I don't have to worry about saying it they don't listen to this no I mean I don't know but I hope not no but for your sake

but of course Hayes doesn't know you but of course then we actually have met and we did have some soup or something in Montreal in 2000. In Montreal? Yeah. Tabarnak?

You had soup? I think we had like pho or something like that. Yeah. One on one? No. I don't know. There's got to be five people. There's pho, five people.

Pho or phy. There's either pho or phy. Pho. Yeah. Five. Yeah, a little bit of phy. There's five people. Pho or fi. There's either pho or fi. B-5-pho. Yeah. Five. Yeah, a little bit of pho. Man, it was sweet.

It was pretty pho. The pho was sweet? Yeah, the pho. It was sugary pho. Dessert pho. Yeah. Oh, dessert pho. Yeah. Yeah, I do love that.

Yeah, with the frosted noodles. Like soda instead of broth. Served in a thimble. Yeah. A really little one. Hot cola and a frosted noodle. Like soda instead of broth. Served in a thimble. Yeah. A really little one. Hot cola and a frosted noodle. It's dessert pho. And it's really good.

They don't have it here yet. Not yet. But in Montreal, it's... Yeah. Sacre bleu. Montreal. Tabarnak. Poutine.

And this is all we did up there. That's all we did. Yeah, we did that. And we got in a lot of trouble for there. That's all we did. Yeah, we did that. And we got in a lot of trouble for that. Oh, God, yeah. They hated it. Hated it. They do not appreciate that.

Asked politely to stop so many times. Yes, they did. And just kept giving them the business. Yes, they were like, please, le fucking stop doing this. They're so polite. Well, Reggie, of course you know that we're here to talk about Haunted House. Of course.

I love Haunted House. It's November 10th, which doesn't give us a ton of time to prepare our Halloween extravaganza. Yes. We're a couple weeks behind when we normally like to start. It's November 1st. Yes. But we wanted to bring you in this year because, of course, you are a sort of a sonic mage. Yep.

And you are inventing new things. When I see you coming, I take my ears aside and I go, strap in, boys. Because we don't know what's going to happen. Yeah, I'm glad you're doing that as a percussion. Thank you. Yeah, I am too. And so are my ears. Because they're prepared then

and so uh yeah so obviously we're getting ready for the big hollywood handbook haunted house next year bosh is loudly chewing on his chew bone he's going directly to town he's he's going ham bosh is just not like he's you know i mean mean, he knows about auto parts, but he also knows about chewing a lot. And that's a fact. And he's got his own series on Netflix. I'm sorry, Amazon. Well. Yeah, well.

What can we say now? Are we allowed to say that it's going to Netflix? I'm so sorry. We are moving. We're moving over. I'm excited about Haunted House. Okay, so sorry. We're moving over. I'm excited about Haunted House. Okay, so yes, Haunted House.

I'm excited about Haunted House. Kevin, write that down. Kevin, write, because the poster's going to say that Reggie said that. And that, I think, is going to sell some tickets. I'm excited about Haunted House.

Should we talk about the one that we did this past year for just areas of improvement? Absolutely, yeah. Visual effects were great. Very good slime. The best slime of any Haunted House. Yes, the texture was disgusting.

Yeah, I mean, I guess it would rival, technically it would probably rival, I'm guessing, just by your description, how enthusiastic you are, I'm guessing it would rival, you know, not necessarily in the news. No, not necessarily. You can't do that on television? You cannot, yeah. You cannot do that on television.

You cannot do that on television. And it's funny you bring that up, because we did have Barf from Barf's Burgers there as well. Oh, that's great. And he made some disgusting smells that we all were happy with. God. The nastiest witch we've had so far. Great witch.

Yeah. The sound. Kellyanne Conway. Yeah, we did a lot of political stuff this week. It was political as fuck. Absolutely. And both sides got a licking. And both sides got a licking.

Talk about the scariest haunted house in the world. If you think about it, it could be the White House. Excuse me. Excuse me. No. Excuse me. Excuse me.

Excuse me. Excuse me. No. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. I'm sorry. You're excused. So, but the sound sucked.

The sound was dog shit. You couldn't hear anyone. And the sounds that you did hear were very pleasant. And it sort of undercut the scares in a big way. Yeah. Visually, it was insane. We had a bathtub full of ghouls. We had a room closet full of scary brooms. Yep.

We had a bathtub that was empty, but you could just imagine what was in there, and it was sort of jagged looking. Oh, sharp bathtub. Yeah. Whoa. That's, yeah, uncomfortable. Yeah, the normal ones are very smooth and rounded off.

Yeah. I don't know. We had hot Dracula. We had a sexy Dracula. Yeah. I just thought, I was like, it's so hot in here. It was. He's in a sauna.

He was saying that. It was very hot. What's up with the AC? In the haunted house. Crack a window or something. Yes, please. Jeez, man. So hot.

Jeez, I guess it's good for you, but at a certain point. I'm a vampire. But we need new sounds. Okay. To help us, we do have Engineer Jordan. Oh, great. She has a BA in vocal performance. Jordan, talk about your degree.

I have a degree. I have a BA in vocal performance. Okay. Do you guys know each other from that world? I don't know. We probably should because it's a real small world. There's also a billboard of you at my school. Oh, there is?

Yeah. A billboard of me? Yeah, a cutout billboard. Oh, really? Yes. Talk about your school. I went to school. You have a school?

I have a school, yeah. Whoa. It's a very good school of sound effects. It's the Jordan Duffy Sound Effects School. First and last name, always dangerous with this audience. That's true. I just want to say. It's the Engineer Jordan Sound Effects School.

Kevin, I'm curious. Did something get spilled in the corner over here? Why is he just licking the floor? He's doing push-osh is licking the floor he's like doing he's doing push-ups and and licking the floor and covered in styrofoam particles did were you in here doing drugs kevin wow wait kevin we're going for it kevin come come fix this he might be getting paper towels or something what the hell jesus hieronymus what did you find jesus hieronymus i mean now we know where he gets the ideas for those crazy paintings yeah that's true okay he's licking the freaking gd floor yeah i don't know what's over it looks like it's a styrofoam, which I know that dogs love. Kevin, can you not do your drugs in this room and leave them all over the floor?

Yeah. And now Bosh is tripping billies, as Dave Matthews likes to say. Look at that. He's like, you clean it up? I want to go over there and lick the corner more. There's nothing like a nice, hard, traction-y Florida lick. A lot of stuff you lick doesn't lick back. Yeah, that's true.

What doesn't lick you ain't licking you back necessarily. Why is there a cardboard hostage in there? Where? There is also a Julia Roberts cutout too that would be placed in the windows. Oh, I see. Just for fun. I would watch that. Reggie and Julia, I'm watching that. You've sold one ticket.

Yes, and you've sold another one too. Reggie wants to see it. I want to see it. Jordan prides herself on having a really good laugh. Yes. Like a good podcast laugh. I do not pride myself. So I think, well the one time we asked you what sound you were good at and you were like, I'm really good laugh. Yes. Like a good podcast laugh. I do not promise. So I think, well, the one time we asked you what sound you were good at, and you were like, I'm really good at laughing.

And it is on tape, and I'm happy to play it. And so I have a feeling that the cardboard cutout was for Jordan to look at Julia Roberts, who has a famously great laugh, and be like, I'm coming, bitch. Yep. I'm after your job. It's an inspiration.

She's shadowboxing every morning, just staring at the Julia Roberts and just working on her insane laugh. Oh, God. Shadow laughing. Homecoming. She's laughing. She does have a good laugh, though. She does. You're home going. Go home, bitch. There's one movie she has a great laugh.

All of the movies. Enchanting Lady. Oh, yes. I'm watching that as soon as I get home. Again. That's my favorite. My Best Friend's Laugh? There you go. See?

There you go see there you go John get the crown unlock the crown okay what's a scary sound for our house where do you start well I guess you

so we walk in the door the guy that lets you in is like a mean guy. Yeah. He's like... Lurch. It's lurch, but meaner than lurch. Yeah, lurch is nice. Merch.

It's merch. So there's a merch table at the front. And the guy working the merch... Man by a butler named merch. Yeah. So there's a merch table at the front. And the guy working the merch. A man by a butler named Mert. Yeah. Guy working the merch is like, just not really paying attention to you. And trying to ask like his own stuff.

Every size that you ask for, he's like, we don't know. We're out of it. Yeah, come on. Yep. What are you, an extra small? Yeah. I mean, that's a scary sound. Like, we don't have it. We're out of it. Yeah, come on. Yep. What are you, an extra small? Yeah, I mean, that's a scary sound.

Like, you know, when you're asking for a specific size of merch, say it's a t-shirt, and someone's like, it almost goes in slow motion, we don't know. But you're like, no! It really should be Chef Kevin selling his aprons. Yeah. Chef Kevin is basically named Merch at this point. Yeah, Chef Kevin works our merch table,

but then he insisted on merch with his face on it, which doesn't really make sense, right? No, no. Yeah. Are you sick to your stomach over that, Reggie? Yeah. Who? Are you sick to your stomach over that? Thinking about? Yeah. Who? Are you sick to your stomach over that?

Thinking about that. Oh, me? Oh, yeah. Sorry, I thought I was like, I didn't research that character. No. No, I am. I am. I'm outraged. I'm outraged. Yeah, I'd be livid.

It's me, I'm Reggie. I built the foundation of the entire business and then I come in and some fucking dweeb is running a grift is running a grift on the talent well you know what they say once grifted

never look a woman in the mouth twice in the horse mouth grifted shifted higher than the ceiling that's what I am today. I'll tell you what, I'm on cloud friggin' I don't know what number. Yeah, I know. It's like you figured 9 used to be the highest.

Yeah, but they must have improved with all the technology. And we know there's way more numbers. It has to be, right? We talk about this all the time. It has to be at minimum 10 now okay and can we just get that officially like in the books because when i'm calling the freaking president yes nothing uh-huh barely anything yeah well oh we're working on it yeah yeah yeah that's

what they always fucking say it's like why do we elect these people? Yeah. Every time I ask, he goes, we're trading calls. You're trading calls? Yeah. It's a fucking phone call. It's been two weeks. We'll have to see Rosh Hashanah's coming up. Kwanzaa's, we're just around the corner.

We're going to have to take a look at this again with fresh eyes. You're right, that is a scary sound. Yeah, it's two weeks on either side of freaking Kwanzaa. So you have to defeat Merge. Yeah. You get a blunt axe when you go into the... That's like your first weapon. Going into the haunted house. It's a guitar made of blunts. Oh yeah, blacks.

Check out my blacks. Can someone who's not African American still use a blacks? Yes. Just in case you guys are wondering. That's good news for me. Yeah, it's great. Yeah, so a blunt axe. And so you get a new weapon.

What's Merch's weapon? Every time you defeat one of the characters in the house, you are given a new weapon. Oh, yeah, right. Merch's weapon is like a text. Merch's weapon is he texts you. Okay, yeah. So Chef Kevin, this is how he... That's his weapon is he texts you okay yeah so that chef Kevin

this is how he that's his weapon yeah that's how he goes this part like hey guys sorry to bother you about this again

hey just checking in hey are we are we seriously out of mediums just wanna see if you guys looked at the designs for this

the answer's always no Just wanted to see if you guys looked at the designs for this. The answer's always no. No, Kevin. It doesn't work. The link you sent doesn't work. That buys you like a week. I'm sorry about that, guys. You can't send links and text messages.

I'm sorry, guys. I suck. No. Yes. Yeah, then I'm in this position where I have to say he doesn't sorry I know too many texts that's terrible

something Kevin's been saying a lot that's a really tough challenge to put someone through like for the beginning of Haunted House I know yeah I know but it gets easier

oh does it yeah it's a harder oh that's how cause then as soon as you get by there it's a slide twisty slide okay I thought you were doing traditional get harder as it goes.

No, no, no. All right. Well, I have to change my game plan now. Okay, but then the twisty slide, what do we think? What kind of sound would that make? The slide is saying that. Yeah, the slide is like... Yeah, like it kills.

It kills for the slide to get slided on. Yeah. That's cool. People's back, like, pants pocket snaps are, like, scraping the slide. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it hurts. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah.

Man, this is a real challenge. The slide has a rash in my mind. First of all, you're scared you could catch it. But second of all, it's just so uncomfortable for the slide. Wow. So it's more about the slide. Like the slide being affected. The slide is the star of the haunted house to me. It's a traditional haunted house

so of course the twisty slide is sort of the main event. And there would be like a little monologue as you're approaching, like, hey, I'm the slide. Welcome to my slide. Okay. I've got this rash, but I've had it for a few days, so I don't think it's contagious anymore. Okay.

And then, yeah, you defeat it. But what does the rash look like is it just like oxidation oh it's dick rash oh dick kind like d-a-k-i-n-e it looks like dick kind like dick kind

dick kind bud what kind of rash you got dick kind a dickine to answer that was his Richard Kine's clothing brand Dick Kine Dick Kine

okay well that helps a lot defeated the slide we gotta get Engineer Jordan in here at some point because she's got this BA she went and got a degree to do this haunted house. And so she basically, this was her dream. She invented a school that she could graduate from. She's a bachelor of persons of the arts.

She loves doing haunted houses. Yeah, haunted house is great. Yeah, yeah, it's great. She's very excited about haunted house. Kevin, write that down for the poster. So yeah, so Jordan, what's the 655? The 655? Or the 944, whatever it's called. The number, the poster. So yeah, so Jordan, what's the... Sure, Jordan. What's the 655? The 655? Or the 944,

whatever it's called. The number, the scoop. I thought you had a BA in vocal performance. Yeah, you don't even know what number is the scoop. Come on, give us the scoop number. Scoop number is...

Okay. 1-7-7-7-7-7-9. Oh, shit! I won! You had that one? You had one. Thank you. Okay, it's a shower radio.

You can pick any of these in a shower radio, but a spider rig. Inshallah. So what's the next part of the haunted house? Oh, I'm asking you, what's your character that you prepared? You got one noise. My character is... And Reggie will be grading the noise. The woman with the ladder.

Okay. You could retract your BA. Oh, wow. The woman with the ladder, she has a ladder, but she's too scared to go up it. She is scared. She is scared. Oh, and is she making you go under it? Yes. Oh, no. it oh she is scared she's scared oh and is she making you go under it yes oh no and when you go

up the ladder she throws potatoes at you uh cooked or uh some are cooked and some are oh no and you don't know which is which oh that sucks she's like She's like, oh, which one are you going to get? But I'm scared of the ladder, so you got to go up it. Okay. That seems like a little too... Is it a little too scary? It's a little too intense. It's a haunted house, but...

Is this third, or is this... Where would this happen? This would happen after the slide? I would say the slide, because you survived the rash. So I think you can do the potatoes. We also, we're kind of trying to give people a break from just like their day to day. You know what I mean? Just sort of like let people forget about their normal lives and stuff.

Maybe it's just mashed potatoes, like garlic mashed potatoes. Oh. Garlic mashed potatoes. Okay. Yeah, that seems better. Yeah, I think that is a great improvement. Yeah. And Hayes, what a constructive way to give the note. And Jordan, what a fun solve.

Thank you. I'm trying to think of what sound she would make, but like, if she threw the potatoes like so you're going up the ladder because she's too scared to go up the ladder and i feel like it'd be like oh yeah that's good okay yeah that would fucking scare the the balls off of me that would be scary but but then i also have the mashed potatoes which would be pretty comforting. Yes, and you can eat them while you go up the ladder.

That's true. Yeah, I guess it's cool. It kind of balances itself out. You're terrified but then it's tasty. There's a pleasant symmetry to Jordan's haunted house character, isn't there, guys? Yeah, a lot of Sim going on. I think part of this...

Let's not do a Sim Jim. sim going on i think um part of this sim gym jordan um really kind of forced herself into this record oh yeah uh and i think it a lot of it has to do with getting reggie to be a teacher at jordan school is that the feeling that you're yeah that's why I took this recording. Okay, oh, well that's easy. Yeah, I'll do it. Yeah, it's the Engineer Jordan School of Sounds. Oh, School of Sounds.

Engineer Jordan. School for Sound Rules. School for Sound Rules. For Sound Rules? That's great. Okay, I'll do it. Wow. Yes. Starting like... And your first assignment is the Haunted House, so this is actually your interview. Okay, I'll do it Wow Yes And your first assignment is the haunted house So this is actually your interview

A lot of the locals call it Jordan Brew University Because you can drink brews with your teachers It's one of the only places where your teacher Brews down with you Like a witch's brew? Yeah, like Miles Davis It's a lot like Miles Davis. Oh, that would be scary if he came up.

Oh, no. You have to defeat Miles Davis. Bosh, defeat Miles Davis. Oh, gosh. I love it. Chef Kevin, have a seat. Shevin. Shevin.

Hey, we got a Threedom fan. So they started calling him that on Threedom, Reggie. Did you know that? Do you know about Threedom? I've seen, all I've seen are pictures of the three of them. Okay. That's all I know. Cash grab.

That's all I know. Cash grab, yeah. Kevin, how are the aprons selling? Hey guys, Chef Kevin here. They're doing pretty well. I'm glad you brought it up. We could use kind of a second push before the end of the year. Thanksgiving must be a big holiday for a Chef Kevin apron.

That's right. So if you could go to PodSwag.com uh and check out the aprons it's if you buy one and you buy a second one you can get both of them um pretty quickly so just for this holiday just for the holiday yeah okay because sometimes you buy one you get a second one you get neither of them back that can't happen they cancel each other out yeah they negate each other okay we're trying a new thing though where one plus one will equal two okay yeah okay so sales are great but let's let's kick it let's step it up let's kick some ass okay let's kick some ass and the the joy that Kevin felt saying ass.

It seemed like he'd never been allowed to do that before. Let's kick some ass. Let's kick some ass. Do we want to talk about the dragon noises? All right. Not today. No. Okay, so we won't do any dragon noises.

Let's talk about one. All right, let's just pick one. The main one. So, Reggie, we talked about having a really little tiny dragon that basically could be in your pocket. Okay. He's helping you? Yeah, he's sort of your guide.

Pocket dragon. Yeah. Pragan. Okay. Praganho. Pra. Pragen Ho. Pragen Ho. Yep. So he is going to be named Haze.

Mm-hmm. That's my name. He's a fun dragon. Yep. Z or S? Ideally both. I think it's H-A-Z-E. Okay. Because he is smoking that loud

yeah he's smoking that he's smoking that stooky ooky he's schwacking doinks if anyone can schwag doink yeah that guy okay all right um yeah so he's yeah he's haze and he came to blaze and yep he's part of his backstory is that he's best friends with smog oh i don't know why, but sure.

Yeah. Okay. Well, I know why. They're both dragons. It just gives them something to talk about. Yeah. I see. You're in this house for a long time.

I didn't, yeah. It's really long. Okay. And so you're going to be looking for like stuff to say. A lot of the rooms are totally empty. Yes. Oh my gosh. But there's so many.

And you're just kind of going like, it's sort of like something could happen, you know, but it doesn't. There's a lot of waiting for the people in the next room to be done. Yeah, it's not laid out in a good way. Okay. That's good to know. Yes. So you'll want to be like, so what's like Smaug?

What do you guys do? What's Smaug like? Does he look old? Yeah. Okay, okay. Okay, I got you. I got you. I got you.

Okay, that helps. Okay. Does he look old? Yeah. Okay, okay, okay. I got you, I got you, I got you. Okay, that helps. Okay, and so basically what we need is just a couple wilds of Haze the dragon saying, hey, look out. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, look out? Yeah. Okay. Because there's not going to be anything there so often that we feel like having that at least will keep your adrenaline up.

Okay. He'd be like, what's the situation again? You're in an empty room. There's a dragon in your pocket who's your best friend. He's guiding you. He is trying to make you believe that there is something in the room that you have to look out for so that you don't immediately turn around and ask for your money back at the top of the slide. Okay, and he's in your pocket. Okay, as in you're paying him to do whatever you want to do.

He's in your shirt pocket, but also you... So I guess we'll need a sound first of him unsnapping your shirt pocket. Oh, right. Undoing the button. Yeah, because at first he'd be like, you're like, what? And then if you open the pocket and you pull him out, he'd be like,

Okay, so it wasn't really the pocket. He wasn't being muffled by the fabric or anything. Not that much yeah yeah well he's manufactured by a company uh he's a muffet oh okay so that's a combination of a muffin and a puppet well it's a muffled puppet oh all right yeah so everything that they do or say is slightly muted or muffled oh okay so now if you hold them up to your ear, does it get any better? It gets a little better. It's like, you know, instead of like...

It's more like... Okay, that was a little worse. But it accidentally, I don't know how much you've listened to our show I assume a ton yeah but you sort of captured the essence of the show in a lot of ways where somebody asked does it get better and you go it gets a little better but then actually it gets a little worse you just got used to it a little more yeah but it did get worse yeah you're more comfortable with it but it is actually worse. And so that is really nice. And I think it honors what we've built here in Hawaii.

I'm just putting together sort of the metaphor of Jordan playing the woman with the ladder. And essentially what she did is... Jordan's the first female engineer at Earwolf. Whoa. Like ever? Yes. Time's out, right? Time is finally out. Time's out.

Game on. What happened was they finally did put down a ladder and Jordan climbed up it and then has taken the ladder and is carrying it around with her so that no other

engineers can come up it. Oh, I see. I see. Would you do the right? Yeah. Yeah. I have my book bag with my laptop in it and the ladder. The ladder's in your bag? Yeah, it's very heavy. You've got the ladder and if anybody else wants the ladder, you better kiss the ring Yeah

You want to be an engineer At this place Go ahead Come into Jordan And tell her What you can do for her Because ladders Ain't free in this town

Yeah There's only one hatch They're actually very expensive How many rungs Just so I know There is 64 Oh

Yeah Okay Nice round Number of rungs That's That's But they're only spaced Like one inch apart Yes Oh. Yeah. Okay. Nice round number of rungs. That's right. But they're only spaced like one inch apart. Yes.

It's more of a washboard. Yeah, it's a washboard. That's why it's so heavy. Right. It's so compact. It's not tall. Yeah, and it fits in your backpack with your laptop. Yes. It actually fits in the laptop pocket, but it's thick as hell.

It's good. It's good. 60, 64, 2 millimeter thick. Just lead rungs. One inch space. Yeah, that's great. I have a very strong back now. Yeah, it's so cool.

It's great that you're getting all of that at once. And some people say, like, you know, you come through the door and then you hold it open for the next person. But Jordan has shut the door and is using the ladder to wedge it under the knob. Yeah, classic. And then there's a little mail slot that she peeks out and she's

like, gotta pay the toll. She's got little BB guns sticking out of the mail slot. Totally. Wow, this is so cool. That's kind of a metaphor. It's just good planning and it makes sense and it's not weird.

And what we pitch for the haunted house reveals a lot about ourselves. Yeah, I mean all of this is shaping up to be one great house so far. Don't you think it will be good? Very excited about Haunted House.

I think Haunted House is great. Yeah, Haunted House is great. I'm excited for Haunted House. Yeah, some people are going to just be talking about that house. Is there a reward for leaving the house? For what? For getting through the Haunted House? Oh, a reward. A the house? For what? For getting through the hog house? Oh.

A reward. A reward. Oh, interesting. Like a ward that's done again. Yeah. Not another ward. Not another ward. Reward.

Maybe you could meet someone. So we do want to get a little more of a celebrity presence in this. Oh, that's true. Maybe that's true. Can you help? Who could you get? Can you connect us to anyone?

Judith light. Oh, Judith is waiting at the end. Yeah. The light at the end of the tunnel. Exactly. Holy flork. Wow.

The light at the end of the tunnel is summoning you. Is that from your good place uh sort of sequel like yeah i mean it is i'm trying to like sneak it in because i want cross cross branding promotion yeah it's a little early to plug the good place spin off but sorry but but i'm not against it we can sit on the episode for a while too when do you think that's going to launch i'm hoping that it launches in q4 or sorry great launch q5 q5 q5 q5 q5 q5 q5 q2 oh wow that is such a great time to target yeah we'll finally be ready again yeah it's funny that you mentioned target too because they're going to be they're doing doing it? Yeah, they promised to consider it. Oh, wow.

So it's sort of a superstore good place. Yeah. It's like the good place in a superstore. Yes. I mean, yeah. And it'll be on Target.com, available exclusively through the app. Definitely through the app. Although Target, I don't know if I consider

it a super store. Oh, really? Well, it's not like Cloud9. That's true. No, it's not like Cloud9. I mean, I'd say it's a store. You think Target's just an average store? It's a store.

What makes a store super, Reggie? Horsepower. Bye. Did you have anything to plug? Yeah, where do I put this? Put it right here. I brought a vacuum. Plug. Do I have anything to plug? do I put this? Put it right here. I brought a vacuum.

Plug. Do I have anything to plug? I don't know. I mean, I want to. Yeah. Wouldn't do much. I don't know if it, yeah, I don't know if it'd do much. I don't know if I, I mean, I'm trying to think of something that I could plug, but I don't really have.

I'm saying like if you did, you have, like, a big thing, whatever we're bringing to it is not going to. Plugging it here, not the most effective. You'd be better off, I think, walking down the street and just telling someone about it. It would be more effective. And then they tell, like, two people. You know, that could be really smart. Yeah, I guess, yeah.

Well, you know what? It wouldn't hurt. Okay, yeah. So you're going to do that. Plug it up. Yeah, I'm going to try. I'd like to plug anybody that has a dream. Finally.

I'd like to plug them up and just see how that dream keeps building up and expanding until they explode. From the pressure of the dream inside them. Yeah. What a great image. They say follow your dreams, but they

never say let your dreams fill you up until you're at capacity. And then Reggie's holding your nose closed. And then your whole head just explodes. Your brains are on the wall from the big dream. Yep. And I don't know why that's not a more common expression. It should be, at least in the House of Representatives. Oh, please.

You know. Bye. Hollywood Handbook. house of representatives oh please you know bye that was a hate gum podcast