Hope Is A Verb - Valery Wichman - Waves of Change

Episode Date: September 6, 2024

Meet Valery Wichman, a leading LGBTQI+ activist and lawyer in the Cook Islands who was on the forefront of the fight to decriminalise homosexuality in her country. This conversation explores the 13-year journey behind the landmark victory and the power of faith, love and kindness to change the law, and the world. Find out more: RNZ Pink News Cook Island News This podcast is hosted by Angus Hervey and Amy Davoren-Rose from ⁠Fix The News⁠. Audio sweeting by Anthony Badolato at Ai3 – audio and voice.

Hope is a reminder. It's the fuel of your soul. It's so much more infused with action. Ability to see a much better future. You really have to earn it to have it. Hope is happiness. Welcome to Hope is a Verb, a podcast about what it takes to change the world through conversations with the people who are making it happen.

I'm Amy. I'm Amy. I'm Gus. And in each episode, we shine a spotlight on the ordinary heroes who are stitching our social fabric together, mending our planet, and creating solutions to some of today's biggest global challenges. In this episode, the personal story behind the 13- year campaign to decriminalize homosexuality in the cook islands i want more people to know about the three basic values of love kindness and respect for all i mean it sounds all really utopian and lovely but it really is it goes down to the values that you live by not only yourself, but for the future generations.

Last year, the Cook Islands decriminalised homosexuality and it was a huge win for LGBTQ plus rights across the Pacific. Its impact rippled far beyond legal reform. This was about changing the social fabric of an entire country. We focus a lot on these stories at Fix the News, but there was something about this one that inspired us to dig behind the headlines. Which is how we found Valerie Wichman, the transgender woman and lawyer who was on the front lines of the victory. With the support of

her community, Valerie became the face of the campaign, weathering all the storms of public opinion for 13 long years. As you're about to hear, changing the law is not for the faint-hearted, and when you're fighting for your right to love who you love, in Valerie's words, it's best to so lovely to meet you. Kia ora ana, Amy and Gus. Kia ora ana tātou katoa te akarurunga mai nei. Ko Valerie Richmond, tōku ingoa. Ewa ini rarotonga, ewa ini aitutaki, ewa ini araurau nei takimata. My name is Valerie Richmond. My name is Valerie Richmond. My name is Valerie Richmond. My name is Valerie Richmond.

Valerie, what is giving you hope in the world right now? When I think about hope, it is about my faith. If we don't have hope, then what does the future hold for each one of us? I think something that gives me hope in this world are our babies and our children, knowing that if we teach them the right values of love, of kindness to Oaoa and respect to Taakaaka is important for all people around the world, irrespective of your views on things. I think that these values set the foundation for humanity. So Val, last year, the Cook Islands became

the ninth country in the Pacific to decriminalize homosexuality. Now you played a huge role in this victory. What do you remember from that day in April when the bill was passed? You know, at first, it was sort of all blurry. After 13 years of campaigning, it was definitely a watershed moment. And all sorts of feelings did go through me over that week. A bit of apprehension. What if they say no? What if they do something that's totally against what we've been campaigning for? A leader in the Ano Noa community, which is the term we use for LGBTQ plus persons, was quite heavy for a long time. But it was good in the sense that our community really pulled together. And so that support and that love, that kindness and respect did come through. did come through. And actually on that day, I was blocked off Facebook because someone reported me for incitement, which was an interesting experience for me, but it's a very real experience for people who are in the human rights space.

When you have worked towards something this big for 13 years of your life, and finally you hit the top of that mountain, is there almost a feeling of being a bit lost when you've been driven by this one purpose for so many years? That's a good question. And I think my answer is no. The reason why is because Te Tiare is very clear with what our vision is, and that is, in English, to lead our own destinies. We have focused on three pillars. The first has been on health and empowerment. The other has been around education. And the third, which eclipsed everything, was on policy and legislation or human rights. So yes, it did eclipse the work that we had been working towards, but it wasn't the only thing that we were working towards. We already knew what we wanted. But I have to say, you know,

a change in law doesn't mean a change in attitudes. But it is definitely a point when a community such as us moves beyond just tolerance to one where we are legally accepted. to one where we are legally accepted. So that was the biggest thing for us. There is the other big, big, big moment, not only just looking at the crimes bill and what that meant for our country, but if you look deeper into it, it was the first time that our members of parliament were able to properly segregate between state and religion because a lot of the opposition was moral values as interpreted in the Bible. And so this was a big moment, not only for our community, but for the principle of democracy in our nation, because the parliamentarians finally understood that they needed to separate these moral interpretations and uphold the constitution of our country, which guarantees certain fundamental human rights. For that, I am so proud and thankful to our members of parliament and our prime minister, who really were brave enough to make that decision for the first time really in our history since 1965, when we became independent.

I had no idea. I've never really thought about it like that, but it's so true. It's a victory for liberalism more generally and not just principles for one particular group. Congratulations. It's wonderful to hear it framed that way. I'm really curious about how this all kicked off. Can you take us back to 2010? You're fresh out of law school. I'd love to hear more about the start of this journey. When I finished uni in 2010, I actually came back for a little holiday, and there was this big uproar over the first publicly known case of HIV AIDS. That was really the catalyst for all of this, because we found that there were certain members of the community that were wanting to firstly kick this person out of the country because they had

this disease. And then the whole rhetoric around this disease being from the Anunua community, a gay disease, you know, the stereotyping and everything's sort of amped up. Obviously, also sensationalized by the media, which made it even more of an issue than it really was. Out of this, the NGOs started to band together because we thought, this is not right. We can't kick a person out of our country because they've got a certain sickness. They sort of came together and did an analysis of all the pieces of legislation which were deemed discriminative at the time. And one of them that came out was the Crimes Act, 1969. No pun intended.

So out of that, maybe that's what caught my attention. I saw it and I thought, this is not right. In effect, it criminalized same-sex relations. But in the act, it was only between males. It wasn't between females. So females were not even on the radar, not even thought about. So I thought, you know, you come out of law school, you're looking for a cause, you're looking for a purpose.

And I've always been taught that if something is not right, then I have to speak up and say it's not right. So I started speaking up and I started, you know, being interviewed by different media. And then I became the face of the campaign with the blessing of our Titiare Association, who are always there through this whole journey. Valerie, I am really curious about the language that you're using. You spoke some language at the beginning when we welcomed you onto the podcast. Obviously, that's something that you do quite deliberately and intentionally. What does the language mean to you?

Language anchors your identity. So I am from Rarotonga, and we speak Cook Islands Maori. And so in our culture, when you open up, there's a certain way of respectfully approaching things. And I believe that when you use your language, you're valuing not only your identity, but your people. That's something that's been important to me in my community. And I think that is something that needs to be perpetuated in all spaces. The Ananoa, I don't know if I've got that name right, by the way. You told me if I got it wrong. That community has historically actually played a pretty important role in Cook Island's culture.

Can you tell us a bit more about that? So I just finished my master's earlier this year, and my thesis was on well-being in the Anuanua community. It was really hard to find literature on our community. And I think when you understand Christianity came 200 years ago, and they created something called the Blue Laws, and in effect, tried to wipe out the whole history of certain things which they did not agree to and not only in our community but on our people so when you have that as a backdrop I think a part of our responsibility as not only Maori as Cook Islanders but also members of our community is to write or talk about our stories. When I went into asking the research participants about our community,

overwhelmingly they said we have a very special cultural significance in our families. And the term which most of the participants talked about was taunga. So taunga meant keepers of knowledge. And that's because we as anua noa, or especially as akawaine or trans women, we look after the young and we look after the old because all of our siblings will go and get married and have their own families. But we are the constant in our homes. And so we hear the stories from our elders and we also transmit the stories to our children. And so that position makes us an important part of our families and of our culture. It was very clear that we dominate certain spaces, culture being the biggest one.

We are taunga korero, so we keep the knowledge of our language. We are taunga rake, or we are the designers of the costumes. We are taunga kapa, we are the ones that do the choreography for dances. And so all of this knowledge is controlled for whatever reason within our community. And I think that's the real value, understanding the place that we play within society, not only before, but also now and going into the future. I love listening to Valerie speak about the importance of language and storytelling because it's this constant practice of reminding people of who she is.

And by doing this research, she was the one who actually discovered that the respect that she was fighting for was already right there written within the story of her culture. And when you think about it, a change in law is a change in story. Since the 1960s, the Crimes Act preserved this outdated way of thinking in the Cook Islands and the reform is rewriting a new set of social rules. This is the power of legislation to shape who we can be and that's why it's so important that we get it right. Valerie, changing a law is not easy and these campaigns tend to bring out the very best

and the very worst in people. What was it like to be on the front line of this campaign and to be so visible and open to commentary and all the other stuff that comes with it? to commentary and all the other stuff that comes with it? Oh, you know, it's sort of like reliving all of that. Would I do it again? Yes, I would.

Why? Because it's about making an impact or change for the good for our community and for our people and for our children that will come. But oh, boy, yes. You see the worst in people, but you also see the best in people. Lines are drawn and you know who's on whatever side it is. It got a bit nasty in some spaces, but I think that is the beauty about culture. It's a protective factor. And even though we disagree on a lot of things, we approached it with our values of love, kindness, and respect. We made sure that the language was very clear because anything to do with marriage was a no.

We would have never, ever gotten this across if we ever talked about marriage. So keeping it to equality was vital. Over the 13 years, I've experienced everything, you know, spat in the face, death threats, everything, you name it. But you must have a really open-minded and supportive family, which thankfully I have. Not everyone has that. My auntie Toine, who is the patroness of Te Tiaré, has been a force for change. And I feel like if we didn't have her, maybe the decision might have been different.

And that's because she is our connection in terms of the the older generation in our culture you can't speak in certain spaces if you're not part of that generation so having her go into the meetings and she can get up and she can talk um so you know it was like a secret weapon she knew the bible like the back of her hand. So when those were used against us, she responds with another text. And I just want to take this moment to thank Lady Masters. It's her and our allies. it's her and our allies they helped so much in bridging the gap between religious our traditional tribal title holders and our generation today um so yes sorry i forgot the question no no no you you have absolutely nailed it.

And of course, this whole podcast is about trying to understand what drives hope. And what I'm interested in is in those moments where it was getting really hard and you were being attacked in really horrible ways. What does hope look like and sound like? How does hope show up in those moments? So I think firstly, when I talked about hope, I talked about faith. My spirituality, my connection with God was so important for my resilience. Secondly, my connection with my family, my partner, and also my friends.

Having that space to discuss things, I think, was key in terms of hope in those times when you really feel like you're being attacked. Yeah, I think it's sort of a mix of things. It's a mix of people and it's also a mix of your strength spiritually. I love it. It's almost like a recipe for hope. Yeah. I'm really curious because when you think about these activist spaces, especially in the LGBTQI plus community, faith and especially the Christian faith is not normally something that is strongly associated with the LGBTQI plus fight. And yet for you, it's the exact opposite.

It's an intimate part of it. Can you tell us a bit more about that? I think when we talk about faith, it's important that we understand the difference between religion and spirituality. I think maybe for me, it was more spirituality, but because the way that I've been raised in religion and the church, I talk about God in the Christian sense. But if you take away religion and you just think about your connection with the higher being and what that provides for you spiritually,

it's not that hard. Maybe it's hard for some people, but for me and a lot of people in my community, you can't take faith away from us. And it's actually a protective aspect of our lives. Let's go back a little bit further. Where were the seeds for this desire to see justice? Where were those seeds sown? And I'd love to hear a little bit more about the experience of growing up trans in the Cook Islands. What was that like? I knew quite early on that I was a bit different. What I called myself, I didn't really have a name. What I do remember is the constant teasing. When you're called something every day of your life, you start to believe it. There's a term which children sort of flippantly say all the time, and it's lele, which is like a derogatory way of calling akawaine.

Myself and many others, we're called this by everyone. For a long time, I didn't really understand what that word meant, but I knew it was meant to hurt me because I was always taught to have the values of love, kindness, and respect, no matter what. So that's how I've approached life. kindness and respect no matter what. So that's how I've approached life. I think definitely my values from home helped me in terms of my mental resilience. I had a lot of friends who couldn't handle all of that. And anecdotally, there's a high dropout rate for persons of my community because they just can't handle the mocking and abuse.

So having a good foundation from home is key. And I also feel, even though I may have not thought about it a lot, but I used to pray a lot when I was little, when I got in those situations. I'll go home and I'll say a prayer and ask god to protect me and help me and help me understand why people look at me or or call me names because i didn't really understand why it was bad to be like how i was but i made it through all of that and I actually for me I used it as a source of strength when people mocked me when they tried to do something to me I used it as a source of strength like one day you will see I will achieve and you will see what I will become that really pushed me into

you know achieving the best be the best that I can be my mom always told, be the best that I can be. My mom always told me, be the best that I can be in whatever I do. She said, if I'm the cleaner, you better be the best cleaner. So that's something that stuck with me to be the best that I can be or do. And then I went to uni and that was like a different world because I moved countries and then you go to all these like enlightened people and I'm like wow this is amazing I mean coming from Rarotonga 32 kilometers in circumference and with the population of around 10 to 11,000 people going to Auckland Uni it's just bustling metropolis it's all the different identities under the sun and a person from every country in the world. And that just blew me away

because coming from a community where it's quite homogenous in a way, but there was just all of this world to explore. And I really loved my experience at university, talking to people who didn't look down on me, who were engaged in higher thought and conversations. It was refreshing for me. I think what's really interesting about your story, Valerie, is there are so many different ways to change the world.

Changing a law and legal reform is not something that instantly comes to mind. What did you learn over this 13-year journey? I think the two things I've learned, firstly, the resilience, which I found not only within myself, but within my community. Secondly, you know, when we're talking about legal policy reform, yeah, it's hard work. But I guess me coming from that background in terms of my skill sets, I was able to look at it. And, you know, saying this, I'm actually in a very entitled position.

You know, I'm educated. I went through university. I've got two degrees, now three. But 13 years ago, I would have never thought about that. So I think now reflecting on it, I was in a very entitled position, and I acknowledge that. in a very entitled position and I acknowledge that. But with that entitlement comes a responsibility and an obligation, which I very quickly understood that I needed to use this knowledge for good. I am really curious to know whether the passage of this legislation, which happened a year ago, whether you've seen it change the reality of daily life for the Ananua or the Akavina community in the Cook Islands and any anecdotes that you can think of. one of the members that I talked to in my thesis. And they said to me, after 40 years of being away, they've come back home. They ran away because they were too scared and ashamed,

and they went to Australia and lived their lives for a long time. But when the change of the law came about they said it was time to come back home so I think that just that one story sort of answers your question because there's a lot of a high propensity of our community who have gone overseas or ran away from home because it's too hard to live here with certain expectations and views. So they go overseas and they live their life. Most of them don't come back home. But just going back to your first question around hope, I think that's what this gives, hope.

Well, I'll have to see. But I expect that there will be many more of these types of situations going into the future. And there's also a confidence in a lot of the younger Anunua members, a confidence, you know, which my generation didn't have. But now they're like out there and confident. But we're very mindful of being also respectful. and confident, but we're very mindful of being also respectful. If you could go back to that young lawyer in 2010 that you were, who is about to embark on this epic journey and she has no idea really what's ahead, what advice would you give her?

Oh, my gosh. I think perseverance. To keep going. To understand that you have a whole community behind you, supporting you. Your family. I think I would tell her to keep going. And in the words of my mother, do your best. This has been such a wonderful conversation, Valerie. And to wrap it up, we'd love to hear as an activist in this space, what's one thing you wish more people knew? I want more people to know about the three basic values of love, kindness, and respect for all.

If there was something that I want people to understand or take time to understand, are those values. I mean, it sounds all really utopian and lovely, but it really is. It goes down to the values that you live by and not only understanding those values, but practicing those values. Not only for yourself, but for the future generations. And I think this generational thinking needs to come more into wisdom thinking. Ensuring that we understand the effects that it will cause to your great-grandchildren. So think about your great-grandchildren, the decisions you make today, how will it impact

them in 100 years time? Because a generation is about 25 years. So I think that if we're thinking like this, and the focus is on setting the foundations or the values or shared understandings and instilling that in our children, our babies for the future, I think it's the way to go. It's easy to throw around words like love, kindness and respect. But listening to Valerie's story, you realise how much courage it takes to actually live these values. And we need to reclaim the power of these words because they're the unspoken laws that bind us together. And together is always going to be the way forward. If you want to find out more about Valerie or dive into some more details about this story, you can check out our podcast notes for more details.

We'd like to thank our paying subscribers for making projects like this podcast possible. If you're interested in finding out more about our work, check out fixthenews.com. There are a lot of podcasts out there. It means a lot to us that you chose this one. This podcast is recorded in Australia on the lands of the Gadigal and the Wurundjeri and Woiwurrung people. If you enjoyed this conversation and would like to support Hope as a Verb, make sure you subscribe and leave a review. Thanks for listening.