How to Get a Girlfriend with Connell Barrett - The 6 Game-Changing Photos to Get More Matches on the Apps

Starting point is 00:00:00 You're out there taking action. You're playing tennis. You're throwing the axe, hopefully on a date, not in anger. Welcome to the Dating Transformation Podcast. Here's your host, dating coach, Conal Barrett. Welcome back to the Dating Transformation Podcast. I'm your host, dating coach, Conal Barrett. I'm here to help you learn to flirt, gain confidence, and attract an amazing partner all by being authentic.

Starting point is 00:00:31 No toxic pickup tricks needed. And today I want to talk to you about fixing a big problem that I'll bet you have, which is a lack of matches, at least good matches, on the dating apps. Chances are you go on to Tinder, Hinge, Bumble, and you start swiping, or you actually, before you even swipe, you check your inbox, and you see very few good matches who are liking you. And that can bum you out. It can make you feel less attractive. It can make you feel like the apps just don't work. And today I want to help you fix that. I want to give you, I want to help you turn your phone. I want you to turn your phone into a date

Starting point is 00:01:20 generating machine. We want to turn this into a device that gives you two to three great dates a week and tons and tons of matches. How do you do that? We do that by creating, by curating six photos that are going to help you get matches and dates. I call these photos the game changers. These are the six game-changing photos if you're struggling with matches and dates online it's because your photos are mediocre they're showing you with your sunglasses on you're holding a beer and five of your frat brothers are just looking at the camera that doesn't give women anything that they want we need to replace those mediocre photos with what I call game-changing photos.

Starting point is 00:02:07 Great portraits, cool slice-of-life photos. So if you want to transform your online dating results, you need to use what I call the six game-changing photos. Here they are. So here's game-changing photo number one for any dating profile. The first photo on your dating profile should be a portrait, a really good portrait of you doing the three S's. What are the three S's? Number one is smile.

Starting point is 00:02:37 Number two is style. Number three is setting. You want a really good, authentic, real smile, not a Zoolander smile. You want great style. You want to dress first date great. And that third S is setting. You want a real natural setting behind you, not some LinkedIn seventh grade class photo type backdrop. Follow the three S's and get a really good portrait that gets you matches and dates. Another thing you want to do with that first photo or that first portrait is make sure that you are making eye contact with the camera, that you're looking at the camera because that's going

Starting point is 00:03:19 to help you create a connection with the woman who's on the other end of the phone considering whether or not she's going to date you and the idea with this photo is we want you to look great smile and look right at her and basically with your eyes say check me out look at what a great well-dressed authentically confident man i am so that's portrait number one. Your second, I should say photo number one, your second game-changing photo to get more matches on the apps is another portrait, but you want the second portrait

Starting point is 00:03:56 to be different than the first. You want a little bit of variety. So for example, on my online dating profile, my first portrait is jacket, tie, blazer, about as dressed up as I'm going to get. My second photo is a leather jacket, a Henley shirt, and I'm in an urban setting. It's a little bit edgier. It gives women a slightly more edgy version of me. Women like that variety.

Starting point is 00:04:24 They don't want every photo to look the same. And so make sure that your first two portraits are, we both want them to hit the three S's, style, smile, and setting, natural setting. However, we want them to look very different. So that first portrait of you, maybe it's a jacket and tie. Second photo, t-shirt and jeans. Or leather jacket. Or a suede jacket. Or basically maybe a collared shirt. Every guy's got his own style, so whatever you think looks good. But you just want to give women a different look at you. When I met my now girlfriend, Jess, when we had our first date, she said she really liked my second photo because it showed a little bit of edge. At first she thought, oh, is this guy too

Starting point is 00:05:20 nice, too safe? Then she saw my leather jacket. She saw that I had a little bit of edge. And then she said, all right, I'm intrigued. I want to see what this guy's like. So if I hadn't had that second portrait, I probably would not have gotten the match with her that I wanted. And I might not have the relationship that I have today. Okay. The third photo you want,

Starting point is 00:05:44 the third game-changing photo for your dating profile to get you matches and dates, it's what I call the awe photo. As in, aww, he's a real guy. The awe photo is designed to tug at her heartstrings. Because portrait number one, portrait number two, stylish, handsome, well-dressed, boom, good impression. Photo number three on your profile is for her to say, oh my God, he's got a real heart. I want to meet a real guy, somebody relatable. So for that third photo, think you with your dog, you dancing with grandma at the wedding, you at the zoo with the elephant trunk, you know, you're holding the elephant trunk. Tug at those heartstrings because,

Starting point is 00:06:32 hey, we want to put a real heart into our profile, not just have attractive pictures. I'm going to read your mind. Ready? I'll bet that you would love to confidently approach women, get great matches on the dating apps, flirt with charm, and attract your dream girlfriend. Right? But fear keeps you from approaching.

Starting point is 00:07:00 You're not sure how to flirt. You struggle on the apps. And desirable women just don't seem into you. Well, I have great news. Dating coach Conal Barrett can help. He's guided thousands of men like you to more confidence and helped them attract their dream girlfriends. So book a free strategy call today to see if Conal's coaching is right for you. On your call, Conal or a team member will give

Starting point is 00:07:25 you personalized advice to help you have more confidence, more dates, and more fun. Oh, and you'll be dating women as your best self, a charming gentleman. That's because Connell does not teach creepy pickup artist tricks. He unlocks your most confident self so you can make authentic romantic connections. Your next steps? Book your free call today at datingtransformation.com forward slash contact and grab a time that works for you. Then you'll be on your way to more confidence, better results, and attracting bright beautiful women. Oh, so you know, soon Connell will stop taking on new clients. So book a call today while you still can. Go to datingtransformation.com forward slash contact

Starting point is 00:08:13 and transform your love life. Bye. And also think about the experience we're giving women here as they're swiping through your profile. Photo number one. Ah, well-dressed, stylish. I'm liking it. Maybe, she's thinking. Photo number two, all right, different look. Glasses and a collared shirt in the first one. Ooh, leather jacket on a motorcycle?

Starting point is 00:08:38 This guy's got layers. This guy is complex. I'm intrigued. Photo photo number three maybe it's you and your cat is on your shoulder and it's scratching your head and you're making a funny face because you're in pain because cats are assholes this might be an amazing online dating photo and then photo number three makes her say oh my god he's he loves cats he's got a heart. She's seeing the real guy. So those first two photos, it's totally fine that these be taken with intention, photo shoot. It's okay if they look a little bit editorial.

Starting point is 00:09:19 That third photo, the ah photo, should be slice of life. It should be the kind of photo that looks like it just happened so my third photo on my profile is my hairstylist dog I love dogs but I don't yet have a dog but I love dogs women don't care so that I don't have a dog so what I have for my third photo on my profile is my dog, my stylist dog, Bishi. And Bishi is licking my face and it's an adorable photo of me being licked by this dog. Both, and you know how when a dog licks your face,

Starting point is 00:10:01 you kind of like it, but it's also, ew, dog slobber. It's sort of adorable. It's very human. It's very heart-centered. So I get tons and tons of matches from the dog photo. Okay, so that's photo number three. Now the fourth photo on your dating profile, if you want to get more matches and dates, here's where I recommend you put in a photograph of you doing something athletic or masculine. It's important that women see that you're a man of the world. You're out there taking action. You're playing tennis. You're throwing the axe, hopefully on a date, not in anger. You're at the axe throwing place. You're maybe at a cool cocktail lounge, drinking a scotch, looking like a guy. We want that fourth photo to show some activity or masculinity so that women get that sense that, hey, you're a good solid guy,

Starting point is 00:11:02 but you're also a man. So that's photo number four on your profile. And photo number five is we got a couple options. My first and favorite option for photo number five is to go with, let's call it a social photo, a photo of you out in the world with other people in an attractive setting. Part of the secret of getting matches with your photographs is to give a woman a little glimpse into what it would be like if she was out with you on a date. So that fifth photo can be you at the karaoke bar singing a duet with your best friend. Maybe you're at a cocktail lounge and you and your friends are clinking martini glasses. It could be one of my clients has a great photo. Dan has a great photo of him tearing up the dance floor, cutting a rug at a wedding. What does that do? It makes the woman

Starting point is 00:12:07 on the other end of the phone say, oh, I wish I was that girl dancing with him. I wish I was having fun with this guy at the wedding or singing that song. Because remember, every photo that goes on your dating profile. It might be about you, but it's for her. Every photo is for her. It's about giving her something. It's not photos that you think make you look quote unquote cool, although I hope you look great. It's about photos that show value for her. Bottom line is she doesn't care about the sunglasses you're wearing. She doesn't want to see five, six other guys in the photo and struggle to pick you out. She doesn't want to see a selfie you took in your basement that makes you look like Dexter in his kill room. She wants to see photos that make her think, this guy has something to bring to my life. This guy is a great catch. This guy is someone I'd love to meet and talk to. This guy has something to bring into my life.

Starting point is 00:13:19 So every photo, even though it features you, it's not about you. I should say it is about you, but it's for her. Make sense? I hope that makes sense. So the idea of photo number five is you're giving her a little window into what it would be like to be out in the town with you, right? Women want to enter a guy's life, a man who has a life of cool, fun things happening because, hey, if she sees you at that restaurant, she can imagine herself sitting next to you. Or if she sees you on that dance floor, she can imagine herself

Starting point is 00:13:57 spinning in your arms. So remember every photo might feature you, but it's about what's in it for her. Okay, and your sixth and final game-changing photo for your dating app profile to get you tons of matches. For the sixth one, I call this the wild card. I call this the cherry topper. For the sixth one, you have a couple options. I like a photo that's very surprising in a positive way. Something very silly or unusual is happening. Because think about it. She's been swiping. She sees your first five photos. All right, handsome, well-dressed dude. Fun, cool lifestyle. Oh my god, he's dancing with

Starting point is 00:14:43 his grandma. That's so cute. Oh wow, he goes to cool clubs. I'd like to be there with him. She's very close to swiping right on you, but maybe she's still on the fence. Because hey, if she's an attractive woman, she's got hundreds, maybe thousands of likes on her profile, literally thousands. So she needs that final photo to help her say, hell yeah, swipe right. And that's what the sixth photo does. I call the sixth photo cherry topper. Another term I heard that I like is the goosh. Basically the goosh means kind of like the free bonus. It's the free dessert at the restaurant

Starting point is 00:15:28 after you've had an amazing meal and they bring you out to complimentary tiramisu. You're like, oh my God, this is the greatest restaurant. I'm coming back here. Assuming I can fit out the door. Rejection, ghosting, loneliness, lack of dates and lack of confidence. For many men, dating just sucks. But it doesn't have to.

Starting point is 00:15:53 There's a simple yet powerful way to gain instant confidence and attract a great girlfriend. Be radically authentic. It's all laid out in the number one Amazon bestselling book, Dating Sucks But You Don't. Your step-by-step guide to attracting wonderful women and doing it with total authenticity. Author and dating coach Conal Barrett has had and fixed all the dating problems that you struggle with.

Starting point is 00:16:21 He's also helped thousands of men gain confidence and find love. He's put his best tips and strategies into Dating Sucks But You Don't so that you can confidently approach women and get dates. Become magnetic and attractive, even if you're not tall or great-looking. Always know what to say to make sparks fly. Get lots of great matches and dates on the dating apps and attract your dream woman. You can find Dating Sucks But You Don't on Amazon or wherever books are sold in paperback, Kindle, and audiobook. Get Dating Sucks But You Don't today to transform your confidence and find your dream girl. And anyway, so think of your sixth photo as the goosh or the cherry topper or the free dessert.

Starting point is 00:17:12 What do we want for the sixth photo? A couple different options. Go through your phone and look for really silly, almost weird photos where you're having a massive amount of fun. What photo in your phone shows you laughing the hardest or being the silliest? For example, my goosh, I've never said that before in my life, my goosh, my sixth photo for a long time, it was a picture of me in New York City. There was a work of, what do you call it, graffiti. There was wall graffiti. And it was a, what was it, an alligator with boxing gloves. So this alligator, it was a boxing glove alligator. And I happen to have taken boxing classes so I put my

Starting point is 00:18:06 boxing gloves on one day and I took a photo next to me look like I was boxing the alligator and it was just a really silly dumb photo that a lot of women made them smile it was the perfect goosh the perfect wildcard final photo. Another example, think pattern-interrupting visuals. Pattern-interrupting visuals, something she's not used to seeing. So if you have an amazing travel nature photo where you're standing in the middle of a vineyard in Tuscany, awesome. It can be an incredible travel photo that transports her to a beautiful place just make sure you're in the photo in part don't just show Tuscany but show you picking that

Starting point is 00:18:58 grape off of the Tuscan vine another goose photo photo was my former client, Alan, had this really cool photo. He was wearing a leather jacket and he had a, his nickname was like the Owlmeister, I think. And he had this leather jacket that said the Owlmeister on the back. So the photo was of his back. We did not see his face. It was a photo of him holding up up his his thumbs and like pointing to the back of his leather jacket so the photo was the back of his head in the back of his leather jacket with his thumbs pointing at his nickname the owlmeister very i would never say put that as your first photo it's a little weird it's a weird introduction but it's really good for the goosh. It's good for that last photo. So anything that makes her smile, that's silly, that's unusual. Oh, one more example. I once toured a prison, an actual prison, and my girlfriend at the time took a really funny

Starting point is 00:20:01 photo of me in jail with my hands up on the bars. It just, it was, and it was kind of a funny, I was making a sad, I'm in prison face. And it just worked really well. You instantly got what was happening here. And that was a good six photo. And then if you have, if you don't have any really, if you don't have any other really silly, crazy, goosh type ideas, another option for photo number six is just take, go through your best portraits, all the best portraits you had taken, and find another portrait that you really like. And just make sure it doesn't look exactly like either of the first two photo slots. That can work just as well. It's almost like a final reminder of how sharp you dress, what a great smile you have, what a great catch you are. So let me do a quick recap.

Starting point is 00:20:55 Here are the six game-changing photos to get tons and tons more matches on any dating app. Game changer number one, a great portrait. Game changer number two, a second great portrait that just looks different than your first portrait. Different clothes, different backdrop, but we want authentic, real, awesome, genuine smiles for both of those. Photo number three is an awe photo, something that tugs at the heartstrings. Photo number four is an activity or action or masculine photo. We want to deliver some of that masculine. I'm a man, man.

Starting point is 00:21:34 Look at me. Number five is a social shot of you out in the world enjoying people being social. That's very attractive. And photo number six is the goosh wildcard, cherry on top. It's the free dessert. What's a silly, wacky, fun photo that could make her smile and seal the deal for you? And if you can't find something like that, use another really good portrait. Those are the six photos that I have tested so many times with so many men. And this is your path to matches and dates on the apps. Because let's get real.

Starting point is 00:22:14 Online dating, success, 75, maybe 80% of it, it's all about the photos you have. It's very much a visual platform. And I'll end with one more important point. If you're struggling on the apps and you're not getting the kind of matches, don't tell yourself the BS story that, oh, I'm not good looking enough. Only handsome men can do well on the apps. That is nonsense.

Starting point is 00:22:48 If you dress well, if you work on your smile, and if you bring some good emotions to that photo, you can get really good matches with some really wonderful, bright, beautiful women, even if you're not great looking. I am not some great looking guy. I look like Ron Weasley had relations with the lead singer from Weezer, but I've done pretty amazing. I'm a dating coach. I've gotten hundreds, maybe I guess thousands of matches. And I've got this incredible girlfriend in my life from dating apps. So if I can do it, you can too. All right. Thanks for listening. And remember your beautiful future incredible girlfriend. She's already out there and she's going to love you. She just has to meet the real authentic you. Till next time.

Starting point is 00:23:42 Thank you for listening to the Dating Transformation podcast. For lots of free tips, videos, and other goodies, go to datingtransformation.com. See you next time. Produced by Heartcast Media.

How to Get a Girlfriend with Connell Barrett - The 6 Game-Changing Photos to Get More Matches on the Apps

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