HR BESTIES - HR Besties Happy Hour – Show Me the Money

Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello, besties. You survived yet another week of work that could have been an email. So let's wind down the week with icebreakers, current events, and hot gossip. Everyone has a stool reserved at our bar table. Cheers, besties. Hello, besties. T-G-I-F-F. Wow, we made it. Big sigh. It's a Friday sigh right there.

Starting point is 00:00:35 Anything going on this week? Kind of a big week for the HR besties, would you say? Just a little. Slightly big week. This is our third episode. We're really coming in hot this week. We are strong performing this week. Welcome to Happy Hour with the HR Besties. New show, more time to spend with us. Sorry, and you're welcome. Gosh, but yeah, big news this week for us. We announced our joining the Ford Network. If you haven't listened to our big news mini episode from yesterday, a couple of days ago, check that out for more details. But

Starting point is 00:01:13 we are so pleased to be on a new network. I'm just part of such a cool initiative there with the Ford Network. Very cool. Especially talking about this on the first day of Women's History Month and the Forward Network, which you can check it out at thefwd.network to spell that out. And it's all about diverse voices and female perspectives and some really cool shows on there. So we are excited to talk about that for this month in particular. That's right. It is perfect timing. And I would just like to state on the record that I ain't doing shit for free this month. Right? So I ain't doing shit for free this month. Okay, sirs. Like, no, thank you. Well, Lee, you know, there's exposure. There's always exposure. We can get you into a... Don't get me started on exposure.

Starting point is 00:02:02 Don't get me started on exposure. It's been a rough work week. But, you know, I wanted to, you know, just share some BS that I read earlier this week, right? Since, you know, we're talking about Women's History Month. But I read that according to Monster, and these are the job people, not the things under your bed or in your closet. Or in my head. Or in your head, there you go. But supposedly, per their research, 71% of men think that men and women are paid the same at work. That's cute. And surprise, only 28% of women agree. Because we're smart. What? No offense

Starting point is 00:02:43 to any of our male listeners. But thoughts, ladies, on being fucked your whole life in the workplace and not in a good way? Obviously, as an HR professional over the last 20 years, I see what everyone in the company makes. And luckily, I have been able to align it better throughout the genders here but it's not surprising and it's insanely disappointing for as far as women have come in the workplace that there's still a divide. And you hear it sometimes you'll hear it explicitly like oh but they're they're supporting their family like a man as if a woman would not be doing that. Or sometimes it's a little slightly more subtle, which is, well, you know, he negotiated,

Starting point is 00:03:32 he negotiated better. And so that aspect of negotiating better and putting it all on that employee, yeah, I don't care for that. Cringe. Yeah. My issue is companies seem to overly focus on the D. Everyone's focused on the D. The D? Diversity. Right. The other D. But they're all focused on that D and they forget about those other letters, the E, the I, and the B, which being a D myself, I really wish they'd put a little more focus on that equity piece. So random call to action nobody asked for today is make sure you have that internal equity in your workplace. I mean, if you're a leader, review that shit. You could reach out to people like us and ask if you don't have access to your employee salaries,

Starting point is 00:04:24 which would you believe lots of managers do don't have access to your employees' salaries, which would you believe lots of managers do not even have access to their full team's compensation? I've seen that throughout my career. But make sure you have equity on that team because your people are talking. You know what I mean? The US does not have this shocking turn of events, but some other countries do. The UK has had it for years, and I believe Australia just had it for the first time. And this is where organizations, companies, have to publish on their website their gender pay gaps. It's really interesting. So if you go and look, especially at some of, if you look at big companies and look at their gender pay gap or look at UK pay, it's really interesting the way they do it because you have to have it on a site. And I don't know Australia's regulations,

Starting point is 00:05:04 but if you look, it's interesting if they put it at the top, if they put it at the bottom, what they make that look like. And you can really get a view on different companies if you just peek and look at some companies. So sometimes that is, they say that sunshine is the best disinfectant, meaning that when you draw attention to things, people sometimes don't realize what that looks like. So it sounds like 71% of men need to do that Google search today. I've worked for at least one organization that did equity adjustments. They actually reviewed all of their salaries. And at that point, I think they had half a million of them. I won't call them out, but you're welcome to follow me on the LinkedIn and see my resume. It's real.

Starting point is 00:05:47 That's my actual resume. Unfortunately. Unfortunately. Oh, my God. The list of places I never want to work again. It's just like my resume. But one organization in particular, boy, they did an incredible job actually putting in their process equity reviews and adjustments. So I remember one year, I just met expectations. Bullshit. I'm not bitter or anything, but I remember getting my performance, my merit, and it was like 5%. And then I was taken aback. I was shooketh when my manager was like, oh, and here's another 15% as an equity adjustment. What the hell? You mean I just got a, whatever it was, $21,000 raise here. And then you're so excited in that meeting,

Starting point is 00:06:39 but then you go home and you lay in bed and you're like, wait, wait, what? Because the guy with the penis next to me was making, already making that. And then some. People are getting their calculators out and they're like, wait, how much was Lee making? How long is Lee making? I know. Well, I don't, you know, it was something like that. I don't remember. I don't remember. But, but yeah, you know, but it was so refreshing and it was so beautiful. Yeah. Except that my leader at the time, refreshing and it was so beautiful except that my leader at the time, the way she delivered it was like she had like FOMO, you know, like she was like jelly. And so... Must be nice.

Starting point is 00:07:13 No, literally. Now you only make 5K less than me. I know, right? She's like, when are they doing my equity adjustment? You know, so hopefully that came to her. But man, you know, I wish organizations would fund that and put that as part of their process. Other organizations are like, hey, this is on our wishlist. In like 20 years, we plan to do this. Have you all had that? No. We've done like market adjustments. That's different.

Starting point is 00:07:41 Well, under the same pretense. Oh, okay. Like you didn't call it internal equity? Yes. Yeah. You didn't say we've been discriminating against you compensationally for... It's a hard convo. Basically. Well, it is.

Starting point is 00:07:55 I think it is. It is a hard convo. And that's why we're lawyer Ashley. They'd be like, oh, if we do this, aren't we going to make our life more difficult? And it's that question, though. Do you kick the can down the road? Or do you look at something and proactively deal with it? I frequently say, if there are things you can do to pay your employees more than your employment attorneys, then as a, as a former employment attorney, I fully, I fully endorse rewarding the people that

Starting point is 00:08:18 do work because most of my friends I graduated law school with, they're in law firms, they're all making, or not making, but are all charging over $1,000 an hour at this point. Shut up. And so, yes, literally. Oh, I've had to sign off on way too many legal bills. Exactly. I know what they make, and I got into the wrong profession. It's a lot.

Starting point is 00:08:40 But on the flip side, if you're in that position and trying and you're not having a proactive organization that is looking, one thing I found helpful, I don't know any other resources, Lee and Jamie, that you have, but a book called Ask for More by Alexander Carter. Super good book. It's not just for salaries, but it's about thinking about negotiation principles. But Alexander's terrific. And especially in Women's History Month, I think it's a great one that if there's things that you're looking for, I can't recommend that one enough. So ask for more. Yeah. I know earlier this week, I DM'd y'all. I slid into y'all's DMs on the LinkedIn. Meow. Sent you an article. I sent you an article that I had come across that was just

Starting point is 00:09:22 so freaking out of touch for how like things actually occur in the workplace as it pertains to requesting a raise or an increase. It was fascinating who wrote that, air quotes, who wrote that article of where that came out of. Well, disappointing. Disappointing. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But, you know, to me, like, you definitely see this a lot when you're, you know, boots on the ground, cringe corporate screech, shout out, cringy, cringy. But you definitely see the disconnect between like the theorist and the practitioners, right? Between academia and the actual workplace in reality. And it's the same ones that are actually performing the work. Yeah. And know how this thing, you know, actually works, you know, and how this plays out with like real humans and not like lab rats, you know, did you all get a chance to read that? I did read it because you guys know my vendetta. HR divas. Hashtag HR diva. But we actually, we had a DM this morning on HR Besties asking,

Starting point is 00:10:32 how do I ask for a raise? Because let's be honest, it's insanely scary. It's intimidating. scary. It's intimidating. But one thing I always say is stick to facts, get bullet points of things you've accomplished over the last year or whatever it is. Do a little bit of research, but go in knowing what you want to ask for, but be willing to negotiate as well., know that maybe they can't give you the 50K bump now. That's insane too, by the way. But sometimes it is legit and warranted. But know that there might be some wiggle room for you. I can't tell you how many times in my career that I've had employees come to me and go, how do I ask for a raise?

Starting point is 00:11:21 How do I ask for an increase from my boss? Or, you know, I got this at performance review time, 2%. Where do I go from here? A lot of what I do is working with managers and leaders of organizations. And I flip it a bit and say two things to those leaders. I'll say like, you know, CEO, CFO level, C-suite, I'll say, do you want it to feel like it's a fight to get a compensation increase in that battle? And generally they'll say, well, no, but we have scarce. Okay. So talk about that, but have those conversations. Don't make it always one up because a lot of those feelings of fear, guilt, and shame are so prevalent among employees. And so if you can do that proactively, you will be better than 99% of organizations. Then also those managers that may be caught in the middle, meaning my

Starting point is 00:12:04 team's asking for raises. I'm afraid I'm going to get shut down. What do I do? Sometimes it's really thinking objectively and talking to your leader and saying, if everybody's asking for a raise, but you're like, I know in my heart of hearts, this is what's going to get, this might get approved. And this is it. So talk to your leader and explain, you know, everybody wants a raise. I've really tried to distill it. These are the people I've really focused to show them the work that you've done as well to try to make that case easier and meet people where they are. No, I love that because it shouldn't be contentious. And first off, it's always no unless you ask. I totally live by that mantra. You have got to shift jobs to make the money, honeys. It's just true. You have to shift

Starting point is 00:12:47 employers. That's when you're going to see your biggest increases. It just is. And that's because employers are typically so short-sighted with their tight processes and budgets and you name it. No one's running those numbers on how much it costs to hire somebody versus just to replace someone and backfill someone who leaves versus just giving an increase to someone that you value. As an employee, the most power you're ever going to have from a compensation standpoint is when you're negotiating that salary entering a new organization. So you see that a lot. You see people job hopping and going job to job, and that's what they're doing. So if your key focus is money, is salary, is compensation, you're not going to achieve that through 3% increases

Starting point is 00:13:40 in your organization for 20 years. It's just not, you know. Agree, unfortunately. I don't think it should be that way. And I think... It shouldn't be. Yeah. Part of the problem is, I say, people will say sometimes, interview constantly, and that's probably a topic for another happy hour. Let's always be looking. But the interview process is actually really time consuming, really exhausting and draining. And so it's, it's not, it's easy to say flippantly, like always be interviewing, but it can also be like extraordinarily draining.

Starting point is 00:14:08 And it's, you know, what you're looking for. You may be in a situation that you actually really love your job, but the pay. And so having that, going to your manager and saying, you know, this, I love my job. I want to stay here and build a career because your manager, that's going to be having that pay meeting them where they are, they're probably afraid, like a lot of managers, that they're going to fight, do that unnecessary fight, and you're going to get that pay increase, and then you're going to leave, and then they're going to look like the asshole. Or they're going to be judged, and then it's going to be hard for them to get future increases. And so if you are in a situation that you want to build a career some way,

Starting point is 00:14:45 paying that, saying, I want to build a career here, but from a compensation perspective, and I don't want to go and look externally or have to only get a pay raise because I have a competing offer, what can I do? Because I do think there's, for organizations, there's a lot of value in that continuity and telling people, yeah, I want to build my career. I think managers need to advocate too for their employees and their team. So if they see someone is going out of their way or even if it's like a spot bonus, recognizing that person with money and not a pizza party, it's just really important that the managers are advocating because sometimes people

Starting point is 00:15:25 are so scared to advocate for themselves. I actually have a personal story where I'm bitter, so I'm just going to start that off. At a job, I asked for an increase because I felt like I deserved one. And I came fully prepared with my bullet points, with market research, and I asked for what I wanted. And instead, they did give me a small bump. It was, in the grand scheme of things, it was a 3%. And it was disappointing, to say the least. But what makes it worse is I shortly left that job after that because I realized my worth wasn't there. worse is I shortly left that job after that because I realized like my worth wasn't there.

Starting point is 00:16:16 And to find out that my replacement is making $15,000 more than me is even more hurtful. And should I know that information? Absolutely not. But when you're in HR and you have friends that are in HR as well from my last company, I know that information. So they weren't willing to give me but a 3% increase, but they brought on that new person making $15,000 more than me. Who do they think they are? Not only are they paying that person more, but just the lag in time that they had to have to onboard that person to get them adjusted, to get them to understand the company, what their actual role is. And all they had to do was give me what I wanted, which was actually 10K more. So that would have saved money in the long run.

Starting point is 00:17:02 Oh, my God. Sorry, I kind of got on a soapbox there what else is up with y'all anything well i wanted to share with you all um that it finally happened what could wait jamie what do you think this is gonna be about i don't know but i'm so many into so many i have so i have so many things in my mind that i'm not even gonna say on a i know it's fine well it's happy hour. It is happy hour. It is happy hour. This is where we let loose.

Starting point is 00:17:27 It's Friday. Okay, come on. Cheers, bitches. This is when we get personal and when we overshare. But it finally happened for me. And I'll tell you, I absolutely blame the media.

Starting point is 00:17:41 Lee's running for president. And the news cycle. But I had a dream about Travis Kelsey. Shout out to the media. He's running for president. And the news cycle. But I had a dream about Travis Kelsey. Shout out to the Heights. You're welcome to have us on. But number one, okay, he's not a crush of mine. There's lots of people I have crushes on. Okay. Well, I see your type. No. What's your type? No, no no he's not even my tall dark and handsome light eyes dark hair okay uh no i'm not into beards that's the only thing about him you know what i mean and he's he's probably a little he's probably a little more goofy than i like i saw

Starting point is 00:18:17 that cringe moment during the super bowl but no i have but i have lots of people i have lots of people on the list you know what i mean but anyway i know it's just a it's a have lots of people. I have lots of people on the list. You know what I mean? But anyway, I know. It's a laundry list of people that are hot to me. But anyways, Travis, yeah, you know, I am not a Swifty. I like Taylor, and I respect her, and I love her music. But it's like I'm not in the club. I couldn't tell you the eras and the history and all that shit. I can.

Starting point is 00:18:45 That's why, that's why, that's why I'm here. Ashley, Bestie Ashley can tell you every single era. Ashley, Ashley is a Swifty. And so I'm not trying, my whole point is don't, Swifties don't come after me because I'm not trying to take her man at all. I'm not interested in Travis at all. Okay. But I had this dream about Travis.

Starting point is 00:19:03 Some of you may know, I live in San Antonio, Texas. Remember the Alamo and all that shit? But in San Antonio, we have a riverwalk. And when there are big events happening, we throw parades on the riverwalk, right? And we have the barges go down and whatever. And so randomly, we were celebrating the Super Bowl down at the Riverwalk and they were doing this river parade. But we were delayed, Travis and I, to get on our river barge because I was still getting ready. Right. And he's just kind of waiting for me and talking to me as I'm getting ready. Y'all, I was dressed for whatever reason as like a naughty nurse on Halloween. I was dressed for whatever reason as like a naughty nurse on Halloween.

Starting point is 00:19:48 Like I was putting for the Superbowl, San Antonio river parade, celebrating the chiefs. Wait, what? This is go Spurs go country. So I don't know what the hell that was about. But like in my dream,

Starting point is 00:19:59 like I was like putting on, this is TMI. I was putting on like red lace thigh highs, like with the nurse's uniform. Why was I dressed like that lace thigh highs, like with the nurse's uniform. Why was I dressed like that? It was very specific. Like it was poignant in the dream because of course I woke up like WTF. Were you sweating when you woke up? I know. Right. We never made it on the river barge and nothing really titillating. I'm sure y'all did. No, nothing happened. Like he was just sitting, just sitting with your legs, hanging over the side. I was just like in this dressing

Starting point is 00:20:24 room, like in this Riverwalk restaurant getting dressed and he's just hanging out with me. Like it was weird. It wasn't even, there wasn't even sexual chemistry or attention or anything. But anyway, I had my Kelsey dream, like so many of us have had because he's in like all the news cycles. Y'all had your Kelsey dreams yet? Or is that tonight?

Starting point is 00:20:47 Yeah. I mean, maybe I will now, but... Exactly. Cheers to that.

HR BESTIES - HR Besties Happy Hour – Show Me the Money

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