HR BESTIES - HR Besties: When your Work Bestie is the only thing keeping you employed

Starting point is 00:00:00 Last week, we gave you all an update on SHRM, right, and everything that's going on with the Society of Human Resource Management. Resources, do they say, a resource manager? No, it's only resource. It's like, I feel like it's like the Bernstein Bears, you know, Ms. Smith thing. It's human resource management. So, yeah, fun fact. Fun fact, right? I don't even know what we do.

Starting point is 00:00:30 All right. So interesting feedback from listeners since then. We have received so many DMs about this. So many comments, right? I mean, some definitely stand out. I'm going to read this comment briefly here. Someone says, yeah, as a former employee, this tracks. Everyone who works at Sherm knows that Sherm does not meet their own standards. I was there almost three years and their leadership is a joke. Employees stressed out. They need anxiety meds. Employees having panic attacks in the office, asking employees to work longer hours with no additional compensation. They are a joke. So people obviously, you know, sharing, raising their hands that, you know, they're not surprised that there's some, what, litigation going on here with SHRM and some EEOC complaints and all of that, right? So it's an exciting time. also received this one that is pretty memorable here. I am an employee at Sherm. Wanted to thank you for explaining the current lawsuits that are happening. The employees are in the dark of what's happening. All we know is our CEO randomly announced. We have four EEOC lawsuits against us, one random meeting day.

Starting point is 00:01:51 The Sherm CEO, Johnny C. Taylor, is reorganizing the company again and announced mass layoffs by November 14th. This follows months of toxic behavior from him, calling us privilege, lazy, and confident on a recorded Zoom call. Wow. Wow, wow, wow. As we are recording this, it is Friday, October 10th. We do not have an answer, isn't that correct, Ashley, on what happened in that scheduled settlement meeting for October 6, which is wild, right? We should have heard something of response? Well, we have heard something in that, well, first we heard nothing, which means there were no filings on the document. And so what happened was in the court filings, in the status update, they'd said, we have a private mediation scheduled for Monday, October 6th,

Starting point is 00:02:44 as we said last week. And so what I personally had expected after that is that there would be some sort of additional filing because, as mentioned, the plaintiff, who's the former employee, suing Sherm, she'd had a deadline of last Friday to file something. They're like, hey, can we hold this off till the next Friday today in case we settle at mediation? So I had expected that if they'd settled, that there would have been something. And I told the ladies, it's kind of this bit raggedy filing that's like real quick, like, hey, we've kind of settled. We're still doing the paperwork, but like let's continue to delay this. And like, that's pretty normal when you settle in a private mediation. And so I've been checking the docket. I've been refreshing it. My pacer bill is going up

Starting point is 00:03:22 like a gas price, but there hadn't been any filing. And so I was like, you know what, why don't we reach out, at least, to the attorneys for either side and just ask if there's an update. It's a private mediation. I'm certainly not going to ask. Can you send us the recording of that? That didn't happen. But I imagine that does not exist. But is the case still continuing? Hopefully they can say that. And we did not hear back from the lawyers representing Sherm. We did hear back from the lawyers representing the former employee who just, at least confirmed that as of, this was now yesterday, so as of October 9th, then it is still proceeding to trial, which means that no settlement at that point in time had been reached.

Starting point is 00:04:02 So today, there will be another court filing, which is going to be the plaintiff's response to Sherm's filing, I mentioned in our last episode, which is a motion in limine, which is those different things that Sherm is asking the court, hey, can we not talk about these different employees, nothing of them should come in, can we not talk about how much money Sherm has, and whether they can afford this, blah, blah, but also they're going to be responding to Sherm's contention of, hey, don't bring us up as a model employer, evidence of our HR expertise. That wouldn't be fair. But as I mentioned, that was a paragraph in Sherm's motion that did not have any legal sites. And so I personally expect to see that mention in the plaintiff's response. So again,

Starting point is 00:04:45 unless for some reason they come to a new settlement today, that will be happening. So I'll be refreshing the docket to read that. But so it's full steam ahead. Oh, full steam ahead. I should have been more clear. We haven't heard any public response to, but we made our own magic. Listen, I like, I like Bravo. It's fine. I don't really like drama in real life. But this in particular, I'm curious. And so a lot, and we got so many DMs from people. We've gotten a lot of from other current and former Sherman employees talking about, you know, what's going on. But, We had so many people are like, oh, my gosh, they're like, I'm literally on the edge of my seat, like, wondering about this. I'm very surprised that it has not settled.

Starting point is 00:05:28 I still think it's, so like also those listening and, and Lee and Jamie had asked the same thing. They have this private mediation just because it didn't settle then. It doesn't mean it can't settle at some other point before trial. And as I mentioned, our last episode, things can literally, they could be settling right now. They show up to trial and they see the HR besties, our media credentials in the trial. they may say, hey, we won't. We won't do that. Yeah. But I'm just like, nothing changes unless we do, unless we stop tolerating things, unless we stand up for injustice and you name it. I am hoping that things get unveiled, you know, and we get some change. You know, this is an HR podcast,

Starting point is 00:06:12 and we say, like, in HR in particular, you see a lot of things and you hear, you hear complaints. some of, some of those listening may have been involved in workplace investigations and things. Sometimes you hear something at the outset and you're like, oh my gosh. And then you hear more of the story and you're like, okay, like it's humans, it's humans at work. And so you see all, all realms of things. But again, in this one, even the legalities aside, if Sherm were to look at its own docket and read the emails and look at the decisions that they made about how they treated someone with performance, and this was, and she was let go from employment, I believe in 2020. The lawsuit wasn't filed until 2022. So we're five years out from this. And you always hope

Starting point is 00:06:55 that when people make mistakes, you do the right thing, which, you know, litigation side, they'll figure that out. But at least you realize about treating people like humans. If you look at Sherm's Glass Door and again, glass door can be a lot of things. Sometimes you read one and you're like, oh, I know this person. There's more to that story. But you read it. And there is so much in there so much in there that's consistent with the same things you see in the lawsuit about people saying I was let go, I was, I was let go after consistent positive feedback. And that was one of the things at issue in this lawsuit was getting positive performance reviews, getting promoted, then all the sudden, getting not all the sudden, but not that long after getting terminated from employment

Starting point is 00:07:37 due to performance, never having been on a performance plan, all the things that if you're to look at Sherm's website, you would see them prescribing and saying to do the exact opposite. And so it's so important, especially for those that are telling others what to do to be a, to be a model. I do think you as Sherm should be a model employer, whether that changes the legal standard, probably not. But anyway, stay strong plaintiff. That's all I have to say. In case they're listening, stay strong plaintiff. Change the landscape here.

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Starting point is 00:10:30 We got cringe corporate speak up on the docket. Ashley's on par for that. And then we will transition into our hot topic. of today, which is all about work besties. That is right. Sometimes your work bestie is the only thing keeping you employed. And the reason why we are chatting about this and celebrating work besties and their emotional support in the workplace is because national work besties, Jay, is this week.

Starting point is 00:11:04 Shout out to Jamie for filing that. It's an official holiday in the United States, but of course you can celebrate. celebrate that globally, and we totally encourage you, too. So exciting week for us, exciting week for us. And Ashley, what do you got from a cringe corporate speak perspective? The cringe corporate speak I have is push the envelope. Have you all ever heard this? Yes. I just like cringe to it. Oh, we got to push the envelope. Can't we just open the bitch already? I don't feel like this is something that I've ever used. Me neither, but I've heard it.

Starting point is 00:11:45 Oh, for sure. I feel like this is like an OG cringe corporate speak phrase. You know what I mean? Do we know the origins? I bet Ashley's working it up. We do. Yeah, we do. We do.

Starting point is 00:11:58 I got you. I actually think I may have said it, like, oh, in some cringe, like, more cringe environments and conversations. Like, we're going to push the envelope. But I had no idea what it would possibly mean. it actually has origins in aviation and engineering that it's that test pilots would literally push the envelope this is like a phrase for like an aircraft's limits and so that was what it used and it was popularized in tom wolf's book the right stuff tom wolf one of my favorite authors

Starting point is 00:12:27 he wrote a man in full which was one of my favorite books living in Atlanta in particular for those that I've read it but that's how it got popularized but because it seems so random like push the envelope like when you mean open an envelope push push it across the table see i've worked in aviation multiple times and i have heard that a lot of course you know i'd be surrounded by pilots like ex pilots and you name it from all the branches you know now trying to work a desk job and suffering through that they could be catching some gs but instead they're catching some zes you know, in corporate America. But that was clever. I made myself fine. That was, that was good. Did you just make that up? Or have you said that before? No, I just made that up. Yeah. Yeah. I know.

Starting point is 00:13:18 I'm insane. But yeah, I've definitely heard that a few times pushing the envelope. But why an envelope? Why aren't we just pushing our limits, which is what that means, right? Well, it is what it means. But the reason people don't do it is they don't want to be fired. So people are told to like do things, make mistakes, try things out. And you're like, okay, but I also want my job. So maybe I'll just live within my flight path. I feel we push the envelope. The HR besties do. Try to. Absolutely. We try to. Gosh, I like pushing buttons, envelopes, whatever you got, you know. I'm pushing something shit. But talking about pushing stuff, I don't know. That's a really weak segue. into the topic of this meeting. But we're pushing the envelope together here as work besties,

Starting point is 00:14:13 aren't we? And thankful for that, you know, I think we can push more envelopes together than we can separately. So shout out to all the work besties out there. Like I said, special shout out for Jamie for filing this special holiday that we're celebrating here this week. But work besties, Do you all believe that there are some jobs you would have long quit had you not had a work bestie to survive it with? Absolutely. Yes. Like, for real, though, because there are the only one that truly understands the crazy that's going on in your job, like world. You know, like I can vent to my husband or my best friend, but they don't know all the characters.

Starting point is 00:15:05 I need a work bestie that knows all the characters and know the characters' quirks and what so-and-so did today. I agree with you there. It is like a shared experience, right? And it would be hard to outline all the plots and the narrative and the characters for someone who, you know, doesn't live it. and like just truly knows the politics and the culture and the interdependencies of all the things and the connections and the drums. I'm with you there. Ashley, same for you. Of course. You think about starting a new job and that's one of the things I think people, sometimes you actually appreciate it after you leave and you realize it and you're like, gosh, I really miss this person. I don't know the people.

Starting point is 00:15:55 Like the office, I have some, like the office, I think when Jim, when Pam had left the office first and Jim, there's like a good representation. I'll try to find it and put it on our Instagram story. But when he looked, it was like making jokes and he was so sad because you realize it after they've gone, which is another good quote from the office of Andy Bernard when he says, I think, I wish we could realize these were the good old days before when you're actually in them. And like always makes me, it's so true. It's so true. What about you, Lee? No, absolutely. And I know we've, you know, talked before about like our group, text, chat, text, chat, group text, whatever. I make that make sense. But, you know, I still have those running ones with previous work besties. Like, it's crazy how it just sticks with you. And then, you know, you find yourself craving, like, updates from the old stomping grounds. Like, is so and so still doing X, Y, and z and like what's going on with that and you know like you're still curious you know uh it's just it's wild but for me like i do need that connection um even though i am introverted and i i do like to work independently and all all the things you know i still need um this like kind of what what we have here and what i've had in previous workplaces i need that outlet, you know, to kind of vent and just like check myself, like gut check and DeLulu check myself, you know, and should I be upset? Should I not be upset? Like, help me.

Starting point is 00:17:35 Like, help me navigate this. Like, I just growled at someone. Was that okay? Yes, girl. Yes, they deserve. Yeah. You know, your work bestie tends to stick with you long after your LinkedIn title ends. And so sometimes you've got to watch out. Your work bestie. going to be encouraging you on it. But don't read that for job preservation. Read that they're like, yeah, totally. And even if things don't work out, I'll still be here for you. I need them to co-sign my bullshit. So it wasn't too much when I growled. Okay, good. Okay. I want to give a shout out to all the small business owners out there. You wear a million hats and still show up for your team. But Gusto can help take some of that load off, especially when it comes to payroll, benefits, and compliance.

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Starting point is 00:19:03 your first payroll. That's three months of free payroll at gusto.com slash HR Besties. One more time, y'all, gusto.com slash HR Besties. Jamie, what's something that you would tell someone that's like? because sometimes people are like, oh, I don't have work besties. But one of the best ways is to make a friend is to be a friend. Jamie, what's something you would recommend people do to be a work bestie to somebody else, even if you're not work besties yet? I'm one of those that does like to go get a cup of coffee and like chit chat with people or around the water

Starting point is 00:19:40 cooler, as the old saying is. And that's kind of how I've found my people is just like the everyday stuff. Or maybe you just walked out of a meeting and Glenn said something so fucking like off the rails. And you look at that one coworker and your both eyes are like, we're going to talk about this later. Like we're not friends yet, but we're about to be besties because we both equally hate Glenn. Screw you, Glenn. Yeah, Glenn. And it's, of course, Glenn with two ends. Oh, always. Always. I've had two. bosses named Glenn in my life and I was kind of laughing at that. Oh, damn. It is Glenn then. One was Glenn from the Italian restaurant I worked at where I mentioned some of the alternative methods

Starting point is 00:20:29 we used to get food. Like, go to the Kroger, go to the Kroger, get the lasagna, the stofer's, get the good shit. Like, oh, I do like stofer's. Don't get me wrong. He was the one that the Lewinsky, when he was when the Monica Lewinsky news came out and he was like, oh, who's going to be the Lewinsky? I'm like, gross. Ew. Glenn. Yeah, and probably at the time you're a teenager and you're like, I guess that's funny. Like, you don't know what to do. You're like, oh, but then the other Glenn, I worked at a golf driving range. That Glenn was lovely.

Starting point is 00:20:56 But speaking of Work Bestie, a guy that worked there who I didn't really know as well, but his wife worked for Kraft and I was going back to college because I do this during the summer and he brought me like cheese dip. He brought me like a case of cheese dip to take back to college. And I don't know that I really made much of a dent in it, to be honest with you, but it was so nice. And he was like, I just thought you'd really like this. He was like a bit older.

Starting point is 00:21:19 It was very nice. Thank you, non-Glen. Yeah, non-Glen. I just brought up some memories of repressed. But anyway, Lee, what about you? If people are like, how do I, what can I do to maybe to support my work bestie today as I listen to this podcast? What would you say? Yeah, well, I mean, I think you should definitely reach out to your work bestie.

Starting point is 00:21:43 and, you know, extend some sincere appreciation for the friendship, for the companionship, for the venting partner, whatever it is, they are for you. But I think oftentimes, you know, we're all just in the moment. We're going with the flow and we forget to stop and celebrate one another and show appreciation and gratitude and thanks. And I think that that is so important to do because your work bestie may be someone that's not even named your work bestie, right? Like you all haven't taken it to that level or something, but it's your person, you know, at work. Don't say work spouse or husband or wife. That's just,

Starting point is 00:22:24 it's cringe. Emotional support core worker. Oh, exactly. I love that. Emotional support core worker. But sometimes, you know, we don't name people like formally. And you still don't have to just be like, man, I'm so glad we're in this together. I can make all the difference because they may not even realize that they're appreciated for that role they play for you. And I think that that means a lot. They'll lean in even more to that. But whether you're into making friends at work or not, I think it is important to have that emotional support person,

Starting point is 00:22:59 like everywhere in your life. You know, you need somebody. Otherwise, the loneliness is just, it's too overwhelming. And it's so easy, especially folks in the functions like us, like HR to feel really, really lonely or isolated at work, you know, because there's things we can't share or talk about or whatever. And it's hard to relate to others. And you don't want to, you know, overstep whatever professional boundary, especially if you're in a leadership position. So it means even more to, you know, try and, you know, have that buddy, you know, at work. It helps.

Starting point is 00:23:39 It really helps. I'm curious, though, from you all, do you have a favorite work bestie memory? Like, is there something that sticks out, like, where it's like, man, we really, like, we took it there? Wow, we really screwed some shit up together. Just curious, if you have something that sticks out. I think I've actually mentioned her before, but I have had the same work bestie for about 12 years now. And we've worked at two different places together and probably will more in the future because that's just how we roll. But when I very first met her, it was in 2014, I believe I've actually even told this story, but it was my first day on the job.

Starting point is 00:24:23 And she had gotten some kind of like breakfast keesh for me as a welcoming for the HR department. There was only like three of us. So it wasn't a huge department. But my new boss, who was the boss from hell, looked at me and said, hey, will you go get plates and forks? This is my first day. I don't even know where the bathroom is, let alone. The kitchen. My work, Bestie, like, you know, before we even knew each other, she looked at me and she goes, come here, let me help you. And we went together and she was like, what the fuck was that? And I was like, I knew it. And literally, ever since then, she still gives me the gossip at my old work.

Starting point is 00:24:58 And it's amazing. And she will always be a part of my life. Like, she's, you know, came to the hospital when I had my youngest. like she will always be a part of my life from moving forward. But that's us connecting. Oh, and she liked my shoes. But like her going, yeah, this boss is fucking nuts asking you to go get plates and forks. And you're new? Like, what the fuck? Where do I go for that?

Starting point is 00:25:24 I was so taken back. Like I'm like, am I supposed to know this already? I literally walked in the door. I haven't even put down my purse. Oh, man. I love that. I had something similar with my favorite work bestie. That's so funny you say that.

Starting point is 00:25:39 It was like a new higher orientation thing. And they had a spread of stuff like drinks and, you know, some snacks. And we both walked up at the same time. And he was like, no ice. And I was like, oh, my God, right? Like, there's no ice? Like, how was there not ice? You know?

Starting point is 00:26:02 Like, it's like 100 degrees. outside and what how's there not like we just went on this rant about they're not being ice all snobby and shit you know all american you know wanting ice and shit oh man but ever since then work bestie work bestie kindred spirits you know bitching about the same stuff that's usually how it starts it does it is the same things irritate you and it just joins you together for life What about you, Ashley? Any fun work bestie memory come to mind? Yes. I immediately thought of Cassie, who was my first work bestie in my job. I've mentioned in sales where we were cold calling. And in cold call, in sales like that, you know, when you're going to get a lot of rejection, you got to have some sort of positive affirmation. And so Cassie and I really quickly became friends. Like we sat near each other. But we were also really yin and yang. She came up. We would like go and have tea. Like that was our thing. She would be like pop up by my cube and she'd be like tea break. I'd be like, Like, yes. And we'd have like, you know, our quotas. We were supposed to be, you know, dialing this, dial for dollars, you know, this. And she's like, she's like, can we tea for dollars? And I'd be like, please. And so, but we were so yin and yang. And so she grew up super bushy, like really bougie. Really bougie. I did not quite the opposite. And so one thing I still laugh. I still tell, like my kids this thing, this lesson I learned from her. She lived, like I lived close into D.C. We were in D. And I lived close into D.C. She lived out. And I lived close into D. She lived out. She lived out.

Starting point is 00:27:34 by, like, Tyson's Mall. It was, like, some fancy, like, Tyson's corners, like, kind of a, it was fancy then in 2003. But we went to the mall, and I'm going to, like, go to the bathroom. And I'm walking towards the food court. And she was like, no, ma'am, no, we're going to, like, I have Sachs or Neiman, whatever. Zero percent chance I would ever go in there. And she's like, no, always go to the bathroom in the fancy department store. And I was like, what do you mean?

Starting point is 00:27:55 And sure enough, I went, it was a far cry from the food court bathrooms. I'd spend 22 years of my life going to. And so now when I go to the mall, I'm like, like, and he's going to the bathroom. We're going. Like, we go to, you know, Perimeter Mall here in Atlanta. We're going to the good store, going over to Nordstrom to go to the bathroom. And so I took that lesson away from my work.

Starting point is 00:28:15 So now if you haven't heard that, go try it. If you two have been a food court restroom life, it was a great tip. Pro tip. That is actually a really good tip. Yeah. Thank you, Cassie. Shout out to Cassie. You're changing lives.

Starting point is 00:28:29 We were two of the only people, maybe one other guy that went on to law school from doing cold calling. Like a lot of them are still in sales. But so anyway, so she, we still keep up. Cassie and I still. She stayed at my house just a couple of years ago. And, man, anyway, still, I'll send her this clip. I love that. Shout out to all the work besties out there. A national work besties day is October 18th. So it's coming up. And that was two years of officially when the podcast launched. That's the podcast anniversary day. If you want to support us, the things that you can do, the number one thing you can really do is in honor of the podcast anniversary is go leave a rating and review.

Starting point is 00:29:11 Sometimes we'll say that gently and I know you hear that on podcasts, but it really does make a difference. And so if you just go to your podcast app, Apple, Spotify, whatever, and go give us a star rating, give us a little review. Generally, you can kind of choose the name you leave it under, at least your code name on Apple Podcasts. But that would mean the world to us. questions or comments. I do have one quick, which is this idea, if you're listening to this, and if you're thinking to yourself, I don't know how to tell someone how much I appreciate about them, or if I do, they'll think my whole family's been kidnapped for ransom

Starting point is 00:29:46 because it would be so weird coming from me. And so one way you can do that is to tell them, like, oh, it's listening to this podcast. You can tell them the name of our podcast if you want to spread the word. Share the episode. Yeah, share the episode. But I was listening to this and they were saying, think of someone that makes such a difference at work, and you were the person I thought of. And when you say that, it doesn't cheapen it by telling them like the trigger of what led to that.

Starting point is 00:30:07 But it means so much that of all the people in your whole workplace you've thought of, they were the one you thought of. And it would mean so much. So if you are in that moment thinking, oh, I'd like to do that, but this feels kind of cringy, not me. Just say that. Like they told me, I had to think about someone who's really meant a lot to me. And it's you because of X, Y, and C. And you will light them up.

Starting point is 00:30:26 Love that. I'm curious about your love language with your work besties. my love language with a work bestie is inside jokes, like through and through. I mean, just repeating the same over and over for years, rehashing it. You know, I mean, just all those inside jokes, the looks, oh, man, and just laughing about it. I mean, that is my work bestie love language. What would y'all's work bestie love languages be? Mine and my bestie is always like going to lunch somewhere, specifically Puffy Muffey.

Starting point is 00:31:02 in Brentwood. That's where we go. And we get our ginger tea. And we talk so much shit. It is the best. I had one a couple weeks ago. I feel like a puffy muffin. I know. I'm like, I feel like I'm hungry. Oh, I meant I felt like a puffy muffin sometimes. I'm going to eat a puffy muffin. Okay, yeah, I try that. Mine is, I'd say, Google Images. Like, I love a good search for something and drop it in there. or now, sometimes Canva. I'll use Canva. I'm pretty good at adapting things in Canva. I've one friend in particular. I'll always Photoshop or Canva shop her into things. And so I love to send a good email across. I'm an IT department's nightmare with my data usage. You're the original

Starting point is 00:31:52 AI. Remember Jibab? Oh my God. Yes. I saw you posted that the other day. I did that. As head of HR, I did that. As HR and legal, I did that of like our CEO. and invent one of our board members and, like, jib jab them at the holidays. And I still, like, I think I still have that. It's so funny. That was such a thing, remember? The dancing elves and all that.

Starting point is 00:32:12 Oh, my God. We thought we were so creative and hilarious. I don't care what AI puts at me. There's nothing funnier than a jib jib jub. I love a jib jub. I just know Ashley was the one, like, spending an hour working on, like, the perfect heads for each elf or something.

Starting point is 00:32:28 Girl, it takes me 47 seconds. Back it up. I will find the profile. well, it'll be perfect enough. I mean, I'm efficient in all that. There's nothing in life I spend an hour on. I am efficient in everything I do. Okay, my bad.

Starting point is 00:32:40 Sorry. I didn't mean it in a mean way. I know, right? Well, okay. I just met it. I was like, okay, God. I just met it in the way that you would like, you're a perfectionist, like you would make sure.

Starting point is 00:32:52 Which for the month of December, we should create a jib-jib of the besties. Yes. Yes, that's a great. What, Lee didn't seem as excited about that as I was. Yeah. Well, like I said, you're probably going to be the one doing it because I know you're else. I can just tell you're super into it. It'll be done today. You can tell. I'm going to push the envelope. Oh, love. I'll make the final comment. You know, when HR told you to build stronger relationships in the workplace, I don't think it meant, they meant, and I can say they, because I am they, trauma bonding with your coworkers. Yeah. We don't want to have to make that. We want you to have, what's the opposite of trauma bonding?

Starting point is 00:33:38 I don't know. Making positive relationships. I don't know. Yeah. For real. Like, your work besties are the people that get you through every day. And it's nice to just have them. So take a moment and thank them then. I know. Happy National Work Besties Day. Thank you.

HR BESTIES - HR Besties: When your Work Bestie is the only thing keeping you employed

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