I Don't Know About That - ATM: Episode 43 - A Year In Review

Episode Date: December 24, 2025

At this moment, Jim and Amos go over the many events that took place over the year. Jim's new special "Two Limb Policy" is out now on Netflix! ADS: Monarch: Use code ATM at http://www.monarch.com in your browser for half off your first year. That’s 50% off your first year at http://www.monarch.com with code ATM. SOCIALS: Jim Jefferies Website: ⁠https://www.jimjefferies.com⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/jimjefferies⁠ FB: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/JimJefferies⁠ Twitter: ⁠https://twitter.com/jimjefferies⁠ Amos Gill IG: @abitofamosgill FB: ⁠https://www.facebook.com/AmosGillComedy/⁠ Theme Song: "Rein It In Cowboy" by the Doohickeys

Hey guys, it's Kamel Anjiani. My new stand-up special Night Thoughts is now streaming on Hulu. I promise you're gonna laugh. I am an immigrant. Are there any other immigrants here? Okay, what you can't do is point at someone else. My Thoughts is now streaming on Hulu

and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers. Terms apply. That wasn't my call. If it was my call, terms would not apply, but it's not my call. Terms apply. to play. This show is sponsored by Monarch. Don't let financial opportunities slip through the cracks. Use code ATM at Monarch.com in your browser for half of your first year. That's 50% off your first year at Monarch.com with the code ATM. Gide everyone. Welcome to our very special end of year Christmas episode. This is just a happy one man. We're just going to be

telling Christmas stories. Talk about the year that was. If it is before Christmas and you need a last-minute gift. I will be performing in Reno, January 17th, San Jose, January 17th, New York, January 31st with Amos Gil. Then I will be off in Auckland, Wellington, and Christchurch in New Zealand. And there's a whole lot of other dates. Las Vegas is coming up February 27th. Whole heap of different stuff. Go to Jim Jeffries.com.

I hope to see you there. Amos, do you have any gills? Amos. No, I don't. That's what it's on my Christmas wish list this year. I'd love to live under the sea to escape the year that was. Amosgill.com for all of my tickets, I'm coming to Denver. I know that for a fact to the comedy works.

February 12, 11, 13, 14, I believe, your Valentine's Day. That's, I'm very much not the most Valentine's Day act. But now that I'm engaged, my disdain of the opposite sex is somewhat faded away. Yeah. So you can see me in Denver. you can see me in Europe. I'm coming to Dublin. Hopefully it's probably sold out by then, Warsaw and Helsinki. But Jim, to this episode is about the year that was. We're doing a year in review, plus talking about Christmas, how we like to celebrate a few Christmas memories.

We start off jogging each other's memories of the way this podcast started, whether it's the village people, or whether it's the Epstein Files, we cover it all. See if you guys have your memories jogged over what an insane year it was and be sure to message us your favorite moments were at the year. Nothing much happened. Let's see. Let's see. All right, Jim.

This is our final episode of the year. We're going to take a break and come back in mid-January. We'll be mid-January. I'm off to spend Christmas with my family and you're off to spend it with your wife's family, your fiancé's family, off in Kankakee, with all the pettinghouse people, a real German Christmas.

Yes, we're going to be in a Kankakee, Illinois, and then we move over to Austria with the German family. You're going to Austria. I'm going to Australia. It's going to be hot versus cold. So what I wanted to do in this episode, we're going to do somewhat of a Christmas episode where we talk about Christmases,

what we do, what we did growing up, which kind of Christmases we think are better Christmas movies, some Christmas stories in the ATM fashion. But before that, I also realized this is the last episode of the year. And it's customary. To do a year in review. To do a year in review. And every year you get older, you say the same thing.

That year flew by. And this one particularly, I don't feel like we've been doing it that long. But then when I think back, so I'm going to start, I'm just going to take you through the year. I've got the events in front of me. Okay. And then this is what my vague collection of the year. Sometimes you go, like, did I host the snake this year? Or was that last year?

That was this year. I was in the snake this year. Yeah. Okay, so I did a 1% This is what I did career was I did 1% the snake And did I do Did I do him this year?

Him came out this year Your movie came out this year But I did him last year But it came out this year Fuck it hell Fires We had no the fire When were the fires?

We had the chat The fires were this year And this is what This is where we start I'm going to begin Notable events of the year Fuck this year So the first day of January

On 2024 what was the biggest event that happened on the first day of January? Do you remember? It's the fires. No, it wasn't the fires yet. That would have been New Year's Day. Yeah. Yeah.

It was a new day. Next question. That's a big event. January 1st. It's a new year. Do you remember the Tesla cyber truck that exploded out of Trump Hotel in Las Vegas? Oh, yeah. There was a truck at the back and the guy was trying to blow it.

up Trump Hotel because the Tesla trucks were too good. He had like propane tanks and shit in the back of his car. It didn't really go. And also we had New Year's Day. We had a shoot. Was the shooting in New Orleans this year? Was that last year? That is correct.

There was a shooting in New Orleans. Fucking hell. Who had the ISIS flag. That's just forgotten now. Yes, it is. Now, January 7, we progressed. The wildfires happen. Now, it's been, we're getting close to a year since that.

Yeah. We started this podcast. After the evacuation, we went to Palm Springs, we came back. One year on, where are we at with the wildfires? Now, I've moved to New York. I've left California. They've hardly cleaned it up, mate. It's just, it's, it's, uh, the palisades are done.

Um, if you live down. Have you been through, have you been through there? I've driven, I've driven past. I've driven past and seen it, but it's, I haven't done a deep dive. I'm worried about asbestos, you know, I haven't gone out there with a shuttle. But, you know, it's not good. That whole area is, is ruined for. it'll never be the same never ever be the same it will never even be similar they're going to put

different apartment blocks and stuff there and people have moved on and you know who knows but one of the most expensive suburbs in the world just flawed just completely flawed no i think back to the friends that i have who lost their houses the the agents uh managers i had that uh lost their houses uh different actors i know who who lost their houses um yeah fucking billy crystal lost his house. And now, obviously, Billy Crystal, what a year for Billy Crystal. If I can lose his house, has to deal with that, do charity events, and then his best mate dies at the end of the year.

Like, you know what I mean? Like, if it gets murdered, so. So that's how the year, that's how the year started. Yeah. That was the, that was the vibes. And then January 20. What happened then? President Biden was still in office.

He was still in office. I thought he was dead by then. When did he die? And by the way, he's looking quite good now. that he's out of office. Oh, yeah. Well, you see, I saw some photo, it looks right. He's getting some sleep, mate.

That's the whole thing, like, when you finish your job, when you're that age, you need to sleep for 10 hours, and then you need a two hour and a nap in the afternoon. You need a 12 hours. You're like a baby. You like a baby. My wife does 10 hours now, and she's only emotionally a baby. The Biden administration seems like a fever.

You can hear me right now. I was only joking, honey. It was on January 20 that President Joe Biden issued a slate of preemptive pardons. Do you remember that that was the big story, that he pardoned critics of President elect Trump and the Fauci and his family. And remember his son.

So his son at the time received the pardon for his work with Burisma and all the other dodgy dealings that were going on in the Ukraine or whatever he was up to in his time and the laptop and all the stuff that came out of there. He got his pardons. Yes. Have you been following up this year with Hunter? I think what he's been up to.

I think, Hunter, I think Hunter's just, he's, with every big thing that happens in the world, the war in Ukraine, the terror attacks that are going on, the ongoing war in Israel and Palestine and the on, you know, what happened with Rob Ryan, I was like, I think he's just sitting back going, all right, Epstein Island, Jeffrey Epstein, the files for Epstein, October stuff. I think he's just sitting back just watching all the other news wash over it. Well, you reckon, because he came out, he came out, so he's been the, the only member of the Biden family that's really been talking.

You've not seen much of the others, but he's out on podcasts all throughout this year since he got his part and basically having a go with George Clooney saying, you fucking dick, you spoke shit because Obama told you to get rid of my father. So he's had an interesting, and I don't know what's going on with his art. Is his art still valuable?

I went off George Clooney when he fucking got into Alec Baldwin for not checking the gun enough. Alec Baldwin got fucked there. He did absolutely nothing wrong. And George Clooney sort of grassed him up. So, no, I've gone off George Clooney. But if I get asked to be in a movie with him, I'll do it.

Okay. What day, if you want a bit of quiz in your life, what day did Donald Trump get sworn in as the 47th president? Well, that's always the same date, isn't it? The inauguration is always the same date. Okay, it was cold. It was inside. I remember that.

Yeah. It was cold. February 9th. January 20, Donald Trump is sworn in. I remember at the time... That's a bit of information. I should just know. I remember at the time,

there was this huge broad cross-section of goodwill for the Trump administration from the Maha movement, from the hippie mums, the Grinola Mums, the RFK lovers, the hippies that were like, he's going to fix food and America's food is poisonous. Even I was more optimistic about this term than I was about his first term.

I thought this term, look, I wasn't happy about Biden. I wasn't a big fan of Kamala, right? Like, what's Kamala been up to? Camela has just said, so Kamala Harris obviously goes away and vanishes and everyone finally says around this time, yeah, she was a terrible candidate, failed to connect with people. She's just throwing a hat in the ring saying she's still going to be the, she wants to be the candidate.

You've had your go. You had you go. You didn't win the people over. Like John Kerry, a bit boring. We didn't believe you. Off you go. But also when you look at the year that's been, I just remember there was this like from right wing people.

Hillary's looking through a wardrobe right now trying to find a hat to throw in. And I'm embedded in that world. It was so much like, we're going to do this and we're going to do that. And you remember, do it. Doge! I remember you... You were so into Trump at this stage. You were like, oh, no, it's going to be good.

He's going to do this, that, and the other. And I was optimistic about the food. I thought, we'll get the coloring out of the food. I was so hopeful about war-ending food. We'll find out how autism was. It turned out just to be Tylenol. Tylenol was the art of that came up. Tylenol.

All these years, the vaccine this, the vaccine, that. Tylenol. So Tylenol is the biggest loser of the year, by the way. Tylenol is being blamed for autism and Netflix bought a documentary about how they killed people in the 90s. Because people were tampering with Tylenol bottles and putting poison in there and then resealing them up. And that's why we got resellable caps and all that type of stuff because people were going into Walgreens and tampering with the Tylenol bottles. It's called the Tylenol deaths. It wasn't Tylenol's fault, but this went on several different places.

It might have been the 80. I think it was the 90s. So in early January. the Trump administration It would have been 2016, we're not sure. They're in full ascendancy. Elon Musk is in the gang. Vivek Ramoswamy is going to help him run Doge.

They're going to cut back on government wastage. All of these programs that are funding, you know, pride parades in Nigeria. I remember that was a big thing. Pride parades in Nigeria. Pogo championships in Chile. Whatever the fuck it was. We're ending all this crap. No more drag story time in the Congo.

Yeah. He was going to do loads of stuff. Him and Trump were besties. They were fucking, they were... He was at the office all the time. All the time. Just standing, just off to the side, just plotting things like Lex Luthor. And then he gets into one argument with Trump and he goes, by the way, which at the time

was the most salacious tweet that anyone had ever seen in the history of tweets or exes, right? And he said, by the way, Trump is in the Epstein files. And we went, oh my fucking God. you look at the Epstein files like, yeah, yeah, Trump's in the... So Elon said he's in the files, by the way, and he had a black eye, but he still don't find out how he got...

He said his son punched him in the face, very likely he had a fight with someone in the admin. He's out. And that was a huge thing at the time. For about two weeks, he was out, three weeks, maybe. Then he came back, all made up. That's a terrible thing. You know, when you break up with a girl,

you've done this, you break up with a girl, and then all your mates say what they really think of her. They go like this, Oh, yeah, she was a fucking bitch. I think she was fucking everybody, mate. I wouldn't have, I wouldn't have trust her as far as I could throw her. And then the next day, like Wednesday, you're like this. Yeah, oh, no, we've made up.

We've had a bit of a chat. Oh, all right. She's a good girl. His rockets are actually very, very cool, aren't they? They land back in the same spot. That's just what happened. It was the relationship. And they were just like, oh, she said some things.

I said some things. And then, like, Donald Trump was treating the front of the White House for a while they're like a fucking used car lot with Teslers with wacky, inflatable guys out the front. Remember he was selling Teslers for Elon? Because Elon, because having a Tesla at the beginning of the year

was horrible. Yeah. Oh, because Elon did the salute. People would, people would scratch. See, I went from, I got to get rid of my Tesla. And now a year later,

I'm like, still a good car. Still a good car. Still a good car. I don't know what to really do. Fuck Elon Musk to the fight to then everyone in Europe I see has a Tesla. So he had the salute. That was mad. People were keying swast.

stickers in the side of your Tesla's, which is nice because I would have had the pay to get that done. Oh, the detailing costs. Yeah, oh, yeah, yeah, it's nice just to get it done for free. I like mine on an angle. Have you ever seen a swastika that's just too flat? Put it on a jaunty angle. That's how Hitler had him. Yeah, I had one carved into my head.

I fell asleep. When you officially go bald and they see the tattoos, you're in so much trouble. You're in so much trouble and they just see the swast sticker and then they're in so much trouble. and they just see the swast sticker and then the picture of Hitler. And then what you do is on the side, if you've got a picture of Hitler on the side, you grow a little tuft of hair where the moustache should be, just on the side of your head just to really grow it out.

I wonder if any neo-Nazi had the sense. Thanks to our sponsors at Nutrifal. To ever do that. Has any neo-Nazi ever been funny enough to do that? Get a titler, Hitler tattoo on the side of your head and then shave the rest of it, but leave the tuft of hair where the moustaches. I don't know, but you won me over with whatever titler is.

Now, that's a drag story time I can get into. titler titler titler it's a drag queen who's Hitler titler have all titler

hey guys we're going to read mind comf yeah my struggle is this Adam's from the porn my cum

so that that was what started to happen in politics was the Trump administration started off with all this

will okay and it was also Donald Trump had survived the assassination attempt there was a

softening of him everyone every organization started to say maybe we just have to accept that this is what the world is going into. And then people who hated Trump previously, like John McCain's daughter, were now just like, all right, this is what we got.

I'm in. The people who are anti, we're in. Okay. And then there was like the tech guys got involved this time. And that's when there started to be the immediate shift. So there was the H-1B visa situation where the Trump administration all of a sudden was like, we want foreign workers coming in here. and that started to split

the more nationalist right and then there was of course the war with Iran I just want to say the podcast has been going for 15 minutes and we're up to January yeah I'll speak this but I'm going on and off

because what I'm trying to get at is the biggest change I've seen this year is the Trump administration was completely solid and it felt quite invincible for a few months and now the biggest figures your Tucker Carlson's and whatnot

have completely sort of There has been a shattering. Just on a personal level. How many, including my wife, people who hated Tucker Carlson had a makeover like, you know, TV shows in the 90s when someone who's like a slob and they come out and then they put them in some nice clothes and they break through a bit of fucking paper and the audience goes fucking mental. How did that guy go from being the one of the most hated people to a voice of reason? Well, he's speaking into his own microphone, not one paid for by the Murdoch. Yeah, yeah, unbelievable. So anyway, so then there's been the split on the right

massively between the Shapiro's, the Carlson. I've started agreeing with Pierce Morgan. It's like the world's going to hell. Pierce, if you want to have me on the show, I'll do an interview. Let bygones be bygones. We have the rise of Nick Fuentes. We've got the Groypers. You've got fucking Charlie Kirk's assassination.

Then the fight over that. I mean, this year has been an insane splintering of the right, which had been together and now it's divided over the foreign policy Billy Joel could do we didn't start the fire

just for 2025 you'd have enough material so going back to Charlie Kirk blown away what else do I have to say that's of course would be one of the lyrics January 29

here's another one looking back on our podcast US Army Black Hawk helicopter midair crashes into the American Airlines plane that that was it so so a helicopter hit a thing

and then Trump blamed minorities. No, it was T-I midgets in the co-

in the air in the tower. That was this year and he said, he said, if you're going to get black midgets, that's basically,

I'm paraphrasing, I'm paraphrasing, if you're going to get black midgets working in the, in the call centers, he called them a call center,

he didn't call it, the air traffic control. And he goes, in different countries, these things are going to happen. And here we are.

And it hasn't happened since. So I don't know the validity of what he said, but there was a couple of other crashes

I felt this year in planes. Can I say air travel this year in general? Horrible. In India, we had a pilot who just wasn't happy, and so he dumped all the fuel as soon as it took off, and he killed everyone else on the plane, except for one bloke who was seated in the most requested seat on an airplane moving forward for the rest of time.

Was it 7A? 7A. And he just sort of fell through, and he didn't have anything on him. Dude, I forgot about that already. That whole story of the man who fell out of the wreckage. What's he up to right now? What happened to the Indian man who survived the crash?

He's still ringing up different late night shows in India going, hey, you want to do another interview with me? And they're like, nah, we've done you. I've got these t-shirts. He's like Phil Olivetti, who's Chris Lilly's character, who wants to be Australian in the year, who saved a few kids from a bouncy castle that floated away. That guy right now would just be down at bars going,

you're the guy who fell out there. You know where he is now? What? He's in Leicester in the UK. Is he? Yes. Since returning home to Leicester, he has been unable to work or drive

and requires help from his wife to walk properly. Oh, so he wasn't unscathed. Or he's just a drunk. So he's seen. It's seat 11A. 11A. 11A. So seat 11A.

This was the year. 2025 is the seat that 11A became the designed seat as he survived the air India. God, I've forgotten that that thing had happened. Plus, in general, I felt like this was the airports had gone to shit. Remember we found out that Newark Airport was running off a three and a half inch floppy disk? And that was shutting down. Well, then for a while, the government just shut down and we lost air traffic control completely. There was a government shut down.

All the black dwarfs went home. They all went home. They weren't getting paid. And we still landed the fucking planes. So I don't know what to make of it. Maybe they were making things worse. So that was the government shutdown. Of course,

that lasted for, that was one of the longest shutdowns ever? Is it over? I don't know. I haven't checked. I mean, it's over, good, good.

So I'm on a website now, 2025 a year in review. After it says that, Air India crash and other airline incidents, it says Los Angeles Lakers acquire Luca Donchich as a huge part of the year. That didn't happen that year. The Anthony Davis,

Luca Donkich. trade. That happened this year. February 2nd. February would have happened at the beginning of the year. Okay, fair enough. Fair enough. Quire Leonard got paid $20 million for doing fuck all. Someone found that out. Yeah, February 2nd.

The Los Angeles Lakers acquired Luke at Donchich. And remember the guy that the team manager said, well, wait to see. I think this trade will go our favor. He was sacked a few weeks ago. It has not gone their favor. It has not gone. The Lakers are in third and the Broncos. Mabbs are, I don't know, about 15th or something, who knows?

So we had Donald Trump in the late end of February sign that keep women out of men's, sorry, the keep men out of women's sports act. February 17, Delta Airlines flight to Minneapolis crashes. February 20s. Hello, pie lovers. Oh, we forgot about that plane accident. They pie lovers?

Right, that's what I'm talking. We had the pie lovers. I still never got my pie for a season update. You reckon you'll get your pies before the end of the year? Well, I did also. find out with the backlog of all the Christmas fucking deliveries. I wouldn't be surprised if there's a fucking update

about the Bondi terror attack from the Bondi for the guys. Gahe guys. Hey, pie lovers. Bondi's fucked. Hey, pie lovers. Our main pie maker, Ahmed, is currently unavailable.

Not answering his phone and I don't watch the telly. Cabab pies delay. So, okay, then we move a little further on there. Here we go, February 28, the first time Ukrainian President Zelensky met with Trump while J.D. Vance loomed over him. He went like this. He goes, you're risking World War III.

And he's like, I don't know if we're risking World War III, but I understand that. He goes, you've been very rude. And then J.D. Vance was just, J.D. Vance was that kid who fucking whispered in the ear of one kid, well, he's been so. things about you and he whispers in another ear, oh, he's been saying things about you and then the fight starts and he's the first

kid to go, fight, fight, fight, fight, fight. He's that little fucking fat face fuck. That was a, yeah, that was a bizarre scene when he was just, have you even said thank you once? Have you even said thank you to our daddy? Our daddy had you in here so gracefully. How dare you disrespect by that? The consignal.

Oh, and then there was a cut like this. uh you're not wearing a suit yeah you've come to the white house you know who that was that's marjorie taylor green's uh husband who also left donald trump's biggest supporter marjorie telegreen resigned because she wanted the epstein files released and donald trump booted her to the fucking curb and kicked her out now the epstein files then what trump does he puts all of the the files with his name

mentioned into being investigated, so they can't be released until after he leaves the thing. And then he said, release the files for everybody else. Oh, it's been a fun year. We've had, we've had the, we've had, did Epstein die this year? What? Epstein died like five years ago. Oh, it's five years. I don't know.

I feel everything feels like it's happened just, it just feels like everything's just happened. Jimmy Carter died, I believe, this year, or the end of last year, maybe. No, I don't. Oh, God. Because remember Carter died. Obama showed up and then he showed up without his wife and then people like Michelle and Barack are getting divorced and then people who are inside or say they're getting divorced and

they're still not fucking divorce. So who knows what's going on there? That was the air that their marriage was the talk of the year. And then here's another story. March 24. Yeah, we're into March. Jeffrey Goldberg reveals he was added to the group thread on Signal where Pete Hegseth was planning military action. Yeah, that's right. So obviously, when it came to the bombing of Ferdr or whatever in Iran, they moved over to Snapchat and all things have been good ever since then. So good of them to make that move to Discord or wherever they're doing it now.

March 26, Supreme Court upholds Biden-era federal regulations on ghost guns. I don't know why I read that one. That was nothing. Oh, that's right. It was a few days afterwards. Senator Cory Booker broke the record of the longest Senate floor speech in modern history speaking for 25 hours in five minutes. he stood up there and spoke

he then got married this year many people believe she is his beard I'm not going to go into that why did he speak for 25 hours was he trying to delay something filibuster yeah yeah all yeah all right

okay obviously then we have like at 22 hours what look at the conversation like what were the talking points was just like and I've already gone over the price of milk but what about eggs was this the ingredients of lucky charms

Is this how expensive eggs were you? Was that last year? That was last year. We're all going on about eggs? That's good. It seems to be every year at this point here. All right. Moving further along.

We get into March. April? April. April must have been a fucking breezy month. Yeah. Christmas and whatnot. Doge basically started a couple of land. Busy.

June 6th, Attorney General Pam Bondi announces that Kilmar Abrigo Garcia, the Maryland man mistakenly deported El Salvador in March has been returned to the United States to face charges. When did ICE just start tackling people? When did that kick off? That's got to be, what was that about? That was throughout the year. They reckon that was July we started, just ICE just started getting people.

Yeah. And then in June 21, President Trump, I remember that was a huge part of the year. Right before my birthday, and it was the airstrikes on the Iranian nuclear facilities. And we all were very worried. I don't even remember that. that. That's how busy this year's been. What happened there? Tell us all about it. That was June 21 that President Trump announced the U.S. Remember, they had a bomber mission fly all the way to Iran and strike at four door their nuclear facilities and

supposedly take out and make non-operational the Iranian nuclear capacity. You recall this. No. Then it says five days later it says, Anna Wintour steps down. Those things unrelated. I believe. What if they're not, though? I'm not a conspiracy theory, but it seems pretty close.

Yeah, she's moving to do fashion magazines in Iran because it's much easier. There's only one dress that's in every month and it's all black. Well, you know how like men's suits? And black is chic, darling. You know how like men's suits? Men's suits go from, they're meant to be baggy. They're meant to be fitted. They're meant to have three buttons.

They're meant to be double-breasted. The lapels are meant to come out. a bit wider. They're meant to be pinstripped. It's just variations on the same thing. If you were doing the burker up, right, you'd go, oh, yeah, we'll make the eye, a little wider, little thin eyes. Make it like that.

Make it a bit more flowy. Give it a satin look and then maybe bedazzle it a bit. You ever seen one that's been bedazzled? I'm sure Dubai would have that. You reckon one covered in sequence? Yeah. But can you imagine when you hugged people? the amount of fucking threads you'd get off a Christmas jumper.

Lucky they don't have Christmas there for that exact reason. Now we move further, obviously. Bonnie Blue breaks the record. Bonnie Blue, what a year she's had. Let's go over it in memoriam. Because she might be dead by now. Bonnie Blue, she broke the record, 1,057 men.

And then she ended the year with a bang bus, where she had a whole lot of men in Bali. She got arrested. We haven't talked about since she got out of being arrested. When she got out being arrested, she went, of course I'll be out from being arrested. I've got money. They're not going to fucking keep me in there. She said, I'm rich and famous.

No way that they're going to keep me in there. I'm amazed they didn't make an example of it, to be honest with you. But she probably just slipped a million dollars and then off she went. Oh, we love Monarch money here on the show. What are you got to say about Monarch money here, Amos? Well, Jim, at Christmas time, obviously a lot of spending, a lot of incomings, outgoings, buying presents for people, taking trips. And if you want to keep your finances under control on the holiday season, you need to use Monarch. It's rated by Wall Street Journal as the best budgeting app of 2025.

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paying the PlayStation Network three different times for accounts. I didn't even know that I still had any more. So don't let financial opportunity slip through the cracks. Use code ATM at Monarch.com in your browser for half off your first year. That's 50% off for your first year at Monarch.com with the code. ATS. July 2nd, Diddy, is acquitted of his most serious charges in sex trafficking and racketeering, but was convicted the two lesser prostitution charges and got himself four years, two months in prison. The follow-up to that, it was 50

cent in him all year having the beef and 50-cent releasing the documentary. And then 50-cent produced a documentary. Like, you don't have to like each other, but 50, how many other documentaries are you been making, mate? You can't make that your first one. Do something about the extinction of an animal first,

and then move on to Diddy. You know what mean? Do something about a conspiracy theory of, you know, how do you get the footage? It was Diddy, Philly. I guess that's why he produced it. Oh, well, good, good move. I see a couple of friends of mine who are more in that world than I that are very angry with Fiddy.

So who knows? Okay, so next thing in culture was around July, Stephen Colbert announced that CBS is ending the late show. show with in him. Is it still on? It seems to never end. It's getting its one year goodbye, right? Yeah.

So that was that. Then, of course, there was the Jimmy Kimmel stuff, which we'll get to later. That was another big thing. So the year in late night was, late night probably coming to the end is the year that we sort of felt. This is the end of late night, at least in the next year or so. Look, let's just say with the Trump administration, isn't it good that we have three more years of this?

You know what I mean? If you think this year was a bang up. It's fucking exhausting, isn't it? If you think this year was the banger, we've got three more years of it. And I don't imagine he's going to get more rational with age. I don't imagine as he gets deep into his 80s, he's going, ah, fucking, oh, you've got to be more tolerant of people. No, no, that's going to happen. Yeah.

Wonderful. And it's moments like that in our show that makes us the number one political satire. Oh, that one actually has a bit of a smell. I normally don't smell. They normally don't smell. That one's wafting up to me. You better put the leg down. All right.

Then there was all that business about Harvard being sued. Did that ever come through? Then we're getting here to September. Donald Trump signs an executive order to rebrand the Pentagon as the Department of War, not the Department of Defense. How about this? I was reading up about Trump. You're not allowed to add on to the White House.

Did you know about this? You're not allowed to add on to the White House, right? But no one says you can't fucking put a wrecking ball through the wall. So that's what he did to get around that law. He just fucking smashed down the wall. So then they're like, well, we can't leave it like this. He's a fucking con man. He's fucking, any loophole in the wall that fucking man has found.

So we had a new Pope. Oh, we had a new Pope. He's American Pope. I think he's working out, didn't he? He seems to be doing all right. You know what I like about him? Easier to understand than the other popes. The other popes are always.

And this one's just like, hey. We had Chicago Pope. You've got to go along with each other. You know what I'm saying? Come on. We had an Israeli. We had an Israeli and Hamas deal. That doesn't look like that's holding too well.

The art of the deal. The art of the deal. They crushed that deal. I actually thought it for a while. I thought that was Trump's crowning moment. I thought I was actually like, okay, you did this. He got them in the same room. He got them all to sit on the same stage.

Yeah, I thought that was something. The Louvre is robbed. The Louvre is robbed by some cat burglars. And there's been a strike at the Louvre. Let's not forget the biggest story of the year. Comedians went and performed in a country. People were very angry. I didn't go in the end.

I had a work conflict, but people were fucking furious. That was a vile vials to try and spread laughter. But when you hear all these other stories and then you hear about how big that story was, you're like, get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here. All year all this shit's happened and that's, some people actually post it like, oh, I'm so disappointed, you fucking soft cock, cunt. When you do put it all together.

Oh, my goodness. It was a month for the news cycle. How trivial was that in comparison to all the other shit going on in the fucking world? I found it very difficult to talk to you through that period. Oh, yeah, yeah. I was so disappointed. Very, very hard.

I was so disappointed you didn't give the my number. You know how annoying it was to me all year that you took me to Prague but not to Saudi? I'll tell you, the money in Prague wasn't that good. Yeah, but the women you could see them. Okay, and then obviously, I don't want to drag these on for too long. We've gone through a lot of the stories that happened, but the big story for this podcast was obviously the village people.

Oh, yes. The village people at the beginning of the year decided to sue us because they were seeing at the inauguration, which I know happened in February now. They sang the YMCA, but doesn't stop there. Doesn't stop there. The village people threatened to sue for defamation.

I have been using them as my walk-on and walk-off music as my showrunner. Where are we at with it now? Because this podcast began on that. We gave a very hollow apology. If you listen to it, maybe our second or third episode, you can watch the apology. They said they were going to sue, and they just haven't reached out anymore. But look, we haven't gone back on the apology. But, you know, look, as the village people are a band that sings about homosexuality, which they do, which I'm awful. If you want to reach out to us anymore, we'd enjoy the publicity. Come on.

Come on. So, yeah. So there has been nothing else. Not only did the YMCA be performed the inauguration, but then we have the soccer pool for the World Cup coming. And then what did they do at the end?

What says football more than anything else? Trump dancing like he's wanking two cocks off into his face to the YMCA. If you could sum up the year in one image. It's this. That's the whole fucking year. Australia made it into the World Cup, America

into the World Cup. Yeah. New Zealand's in the World Cup. Okay, so that's... Australia and New Zealand are in the same pool. They're in the same fucking pool, which means tickets to go see it for Australians are going to be very expensive. But where there's a will, there's a way.

I will be going in the game. I don't have to buy them from scalpers or whatever. I know that's not the term you use at the moment. Native American Indians selling me tickets. And now a segment that we did not even remotely stick to despite saying we would was kind of the week. I said to you we'd get the cunt of the year of which we would put all these nominees in.

We just really have no structure. We're deeply unprofessional men. But I figured this is the last episode of the year. Look, Amos, I believe we're going to come back with this podcast stronger and harder. And we may even rename it so that people won't know the type of podcast. and we will put because we started off the podcast doing characters

who are Bill and Bill and Ben Bill Tongs? Who were they? Jesus. Bob Bob and Bill is Bill Tom Bill and Bob's Bill Tong Oh, no.

Oh, shit. No, Jontie, Jontie and Bob. Jonti. So Jonti and Bob's Bill Tong and then we do think we will start doing sketches for a sitcom

that's called Bonnie and Greta. So it's going to be like the odd couple. It was a crazy. year, because we're at one point together. Hey, hey, what is Greta done this year? Let's give a Greta in review. What, what is Greta contributed? How much better is the world because of Greta? What has Greta done? From what I can tell, she went back to Gaza twice. Went to Gaza twice. And is Gaza better? Is it all fixed now because of Greta? Did she fix it? Yeah, she got a few sandwiches out of it. Oh, good. Yeah, yeah. See, she seemed to be eating more

in Gaza than the children of Gaza. She was taking food away from the starving people of Gaza. She's always sitting there in a little smirk on her face, having a sandwich going, hey, you've helped people out together. She was fed like she was on a carnival cruise, old Greta, taking the food aid boat. I'll tell you, I'll tell you, Bonnie Blue has done more for race relations in the world than fucking Greta Thumburg has. I'm telling you, she's brought more people together on a bus.

I think that's how Buddy Blue does die as she goes into Gaza and gets her gang bang. All Muslim men who fought, she's offered up. You can say what you want about Bonnie Blue, but she does make people come together. Yeah, Donald Trump might use her as a bargaining chip. He goes, for Russia, Ukraine. She'll fuck all the soldiers on both sides. Yeah, nah, but she's English, you see. There hasn't been an American girl who's stood up like Bonnie Blue has in the porn industry.

Where's the American freedom? I challenge you in 2026, America. American ladies to be as feministic as Bonnie Blue and break that record. Records are made to be broken. It's out there, ready to go. I'll tell you who's made the most amount of money out of Bonnie Blue. Ski-Marks manufacturers. Ski-mask manufacturers have had a fucking shit hot yet.

Think about it. All the terrorists. Terrorists. All the terrorists. All the bloke's fucking Bonnie Blue. ice they're all fucking if you're

if you're if you're a ski mask manufacturer in 2025 you're fucking on a yacht you're not out in the snow you're in the you're on the beach right now kicking back you're talking to women

where did you get all your money oh fucking I make ski masks you know those ones that you think oh all right is there a lot of money in that is there a lot of money in that where do you sell those you sell those in the cold climate side are everywhere No, everywhere.

Usually in the desert. Anyway. I've had a big influx of them in the middle of Bali, which is on the equator. One of the hottest places on the earth I'm selling ski master Barlian, Barnesans. Balinese? Balinese. Who's our cunt of the year? Oh, well, the best cunt of the year is Bonnie Blue's cunt.

That's the best one. That's the one that gets the trophy for our favorite cun of the year. No, the trophy is her cunt. mangled up Yeah The trophy is Many people think It's a picture

Of the Grand Canyon So Who would win it? Who's our Gunn of the Year? I think Trump's gonna win it But I think that's

He's a nominee Let's get some nominees Right So But Trump's a bit too cliche To give it to Trump Netanyahu's going to be a nominee

We've got a Fucking Who else can we have The Bondi terrorists The Bondi terrorists. But there's so many terrorists. Listen, that one means a lot to us. Because they're little fucking petty cunts.

We won't even give them a nomination each. They get one nomination together, you little fucking low-life fucks. Yeah. But do we for kind of the year, do we, these big political figures and grim ones, or do we go for more,

like, dushy people in the media or things like that, you know? Well, that's a not a bad one. We can have people who vote for kind of the, No, we'll just do it ourselves because at the end of the year

we don't want to make people bloody work but leave comments underneath say who you think who your kind of the year should have been give us your opinions I don't really have it like because like it's too cliche

to just go like Netanyahu fucking I know I know but we can also you know we can put in a like you know someone who made a shitty movie or something I think we just

just leave it with Bonnie Blue's cunt. I think, I think, yeah, because we didn't say that cunt of the year was going to be negative. We didn't say

it's going to be negative. So the cun of the year... We misread it all year. Yeah, the cut of the year is going to be a literal cunt. Bonnie, Bonnie's black and blue.

Yeah, worst person, Bibi, but cunt of the year is Bonnie. Bonnie's black and blue, cunt. Yeah, that'll,

that'll, That'll do. That'll do. I don't know how we're going to hang the award off it. Hopefully, hopefully it's one of those ones with a pin on the back like a metal and not something you have to put around a neck. Yeah, well, you know,

I thought we could have like wet concrete and you put the person's hand in there. She can just squat down and we get an imprint of it. Yeah, just on the beaches of Bali. On the beaches of Bali. All right, that's the second of the year. The cut of the year is Bully Blues. We start, listen, we started.

the podcast at your house where you were sitting we did episodes there then we went to the actual studio then we got out of the road but i was in australia i don't know if i'd ever internationally toured as much as i have this year and then when i include going out to argentina to do the snake and being in australia to do the one percent club and then you know touring all of europe and and also all the people who came out to europe and the uk for those gigs they were some of the fun, look, I was sober and I was present and I, I, I, um, that, the audiences were the best crowds I've ever performed in front of and I had such a good time that we are, at the moment, if you're saying, oh, but you didn't come to my city, we're going to do another

lot of Europe. Not, not the cities we've already been to. We're going to find other cities to come to. Yeah, we're going to find some other cities to come to. But thank you everyone who listened to the podcast. It's, listen, it's difficult on the road. It's basically, Most of the time, you guys, just listening to a Zoom call. This is what I'll say about people listening to the podcast. We haven't gained listeners, but we haven't fucking lost them. And I appreciate, appreciate your staying around all year listening to this because the sound quality hasn't always been great. I've gone through four microphones.

The professionalism hasn't always been there. But you have. You know what's funny. We appreciate you. When I was a radio broadcaster, I had a team of four producers who would print things off for me so I could read. And I was the silly one on the show. show and now I have to, it's been really hard for me. I have to drive the show because I'm lazy. Yeah. And it's not my natural role, to be honest with you to try. I like to

react. I like to be the one that is shooting off because of the facts. Now I have to do the facts. Dangerous business. So the podcast has gotten more dumb as time goes on. I've lost complete faith in myself for having any opinion on the news. I've been made to look a full plenty of times. I feel ashamed of a lot of things that I've supported and not supported. That's just being a human being. You came into this podcast. Trump's going to change the world. Just you watch. And now look at you. Well, I felt like how I felt in 2009 when I thought Obama was going to fix things and he bailed out the bank. So I've really become quite nihilistic. And all I care about now is my friends and having a laugh with people I like. But at least you still got Anthony

Albanese, your favorite politician. I've got that. Yeah. He's still there. And we've got a break now for Christmas. And I love the Christmas break. I'm a huge Christmas person. I'm going to go to the Rockettes one of these nights if I can. I've always wanted to go But my problem with the Rockettes is How long is the show? Because I know the kicking And I want to see the kicking

But I only want to see it for five minutes How much more can there be Than them all doing the kicking? Yeah, and I thought I thought it would be like Is it meant to be like super sexy? It can't be because they've got matinee sessions Oh, remember we went to France

And we saw a show that wasn't the Moulin Rouge With a whole lot of Australian girls going Bonjour! Sure. So what I'm going to do now is finish the show talking about Christmas. I'm going to ask you some questions. Sure. You've seen more of them than me.

And you're a dad. And I think the best thing about Christmas is kids. Christmas gets so much better when you have kids. That's one of the things where Christmas improves is with kids. The saddest Christmases in my life was 20 to 30. And they were, you know, alcohol drugs and all that type of stuff. And then I look back at them like, they were shit Christmases. And then there was occasional girlfriend where you'd go over to their.

family's house or something like that but ever since i've had children christmas has been magical the best christmases of my life have been not as a child myself but as an adult with kids uh and so i've not had a family christmas since i love to america you know and uh i go with my girlfriend so my girlfriend's family is together and german and they love christmas and they do it so well and they have all these events and parties and a huge family and i love it so much now i really kind of miss my family the hard thing is when you're in a serious relationship is I tell him, and okay,

one year we've got to go back for my Christmas. And she actually, she said, that was so brutal. She goes, yeah, I know,

but your Christmas is a kind of shit though. Like, it's just, it's just, you've got a single dad. So like, it's kind of, it's just be like,

you and your dad. And like, you guys have a beer and like, then you watch this cricket game the next day, whereas we go caroling and do this. And like, can we just go see your family

that are broken up at different months? And I was a bit like, fuck you. It's my family Christmas. She's both right, but there's nothing like an Aussie Christmas. An Aussie Christmas, where you're in your pajamas, but they're shorts. You know, those little tiny cotton ones and stuff, and you come down. An Aussie Christmas, where you can play with your toys right away.

You don't have to fucking ride your bike in a few months where the snow settles down, where you're not fucking stuck in traffic and everyone can make it there. You know what I mean? It's a banger. And you're all swimming in the pool. It's really nice Australian Christmas. Drinking white wine in the sun. I won't have a fucking bad word set against an Australian Christmas.

I like an Australian Christmas. The beach, the prawns, the ham. I'm going to fucking eat my body weight and fucking prawns. They're going to be, look, I'm going to get a lot of cholesterol in me eating prawns. I fucking love prawns. My brother said there'll be six kilos waiting for you when we get there. We have a bucket of ice to put them on. Don't worry about it, mate.

So I'm going to ask you some questions about Christmas now. Sure. Best climate for Christmas, winter or summer? Summer. Everyone can make it. There's never been a news footage up and they won't be home for Christmas. There's never, every Christmas in cold countries, there's tragedies happening. There's always people fucking dying and shit.

They're snowed in their car and they're fucking, you know, no, you get less deaths in the heat. Mind you, the fires can get there. Best Christmas film. okay so over the years i've had christmas films that i like i used to like those rank and bass you know rid of the red nose reindeer the year without christmas and all that type of stuff i used to love those as a kid i watched for them for all the time my kids never really picked up on them as much as as i really dug them but um watching through my children's eyes uh i'm going home alone yes that's the one that you like with the kids yep home alone i i also i also big fan of national

Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, Chevy Chase, I think that's a winner. That's my, the film that, if I was sitting by myself, that's the film that I want to watch. I go with, I go with Christmas Vacation, National Lampoen's Christmas Vacation. I always throw die hard on there. I can't, I can't help it. It's a good movie, but I've seen it like three times and I don't need to see it all the time. I can watch, I can watch Home Alone every year and I'm fine. I'm good, I'm good with that.

It's a beautiful life. I've seen it three times. It's a great movie. I don't need to, you know, I don't see it every year. That doesn't make the, no, that doesn't make the cut. Okay. It's a fucking morbid film, man. So, it's a guy trying to commit suicide.

Like, it's not, it's not a fucking fluffy film. Gift giving, okay, in the family. Do you, Jim Jeffries, give a gift to everybody, or do you support a Chris Kringle? I support the gifts being given by Santa Claus and Santa Claus. No, no, to the broad. order family. Oh, okay. Your brothers, for instance.

I buy gifts for my wife. I buy gifts for my children. And that's it. Can I tell you what I do with my brother? I find this fun. So my brother and I, this started when we had absolutely no money in our 20s. My brother and I have a tradition where we screenshot what we would have got each other

and we hand each other a picture wrapped up. It's just a picture of the order form. And I go, I would have got you that. And my brother goes, I would have got you this. On Christmas morning, I'm going to send you a picture of the shit I have. Just the fucking prawn creeping out of your asshole. It'll have the, it'll be a, it'll have a pink hue. Because people say it's the thought that counts.

And that is the actual thought is the added to card. Not if it's like that's a thousand dollar gift. No, but we don't go silly with it. Like I go, here's an Everton dressing gown. And he'll be like, here's an Everton dressing gown. as a fucking Tottenham's away kit. And we go, oh, that thanks, man. And we go, break even.

That's what I would have got you. Yeah. That was from when we were really, really broke. And we haven't amended it. We've really liked that as a tradition. It makes us laugh every year. Okay, next one. Because I've got a family that gives gifts to everyone.

Anika's family, they all give each other's gifts. So I've had to go out there and buy them all presents. And it's like, there's like 10, 11 people, man. Oh, no, no, no, no. So I'm seeing my brother this Christmas. And he has a four-year-old. I have a four-year-old. and the deal is we buy gifts for the kids the end the kids get gifts no one no one else gets gifts

i'll tell you what i do if i'm if i'm getting gifts and i'm the worst shot i do it all last minute you best believe i go to a barns and noble or a dimmicks in australia i buy 12 books that i think are interesting and i just gift them out that's all you get from me is a fucking book i love giving out a book it's a swami gift as well because people kind of oh i kind of go oh i'm a reader well i don't as you can see Me and the wife, I ask, I ask for nothing. I don't want gifts because, you know, I'm the only person who works in the family. So all the money that's spent is my money.

So I'm like, you don't have to get me any gifts. I'll buy me sell something if I want to buy something for myself. Worst gift, worst gift you never receive. I like to spoil my kids at Christmas though. I like to spoil my kids at Christmas because I try not to buy them gifts through the rest of the year. My wife, however, does buy them toys through the rest of the year, but I don't buy them anything else through the rest of the year. until Christmas.

Okay. Worst gift you remember receiving as a child? It would have been that there's a whole ear of, okay,

so I haven't, my mother collected dolls. Right? So she collected dolls and then, you know, you're allowed to collect whatever you want to collect

it's your collection. But the house was filled with fucking porcelain creepy dolls, right? Then she decided she wanted to collect teddy bears, but no one in the family

would go, you're allowed to have two big collections. in the house, Dad wouldn't have stood for that. So all of a sudden, old Jeffrey here, he started collecting teddy bears. So I was a teddy bear collector, whether I liked it or not. The name of a teddy bear collector is an arctophile. You didn't know that.

An arctophile? Arctophile. And so I was an arctophile. And my mother would give me quite a large teddy bear each year as one of my main gifts. Never wanted it. Never, wouldn't even name the fucking thing. And it was just so that she had a different collection of things that she wanted. I love when people give you the gift that they want to use.

That's what I'm saying. So she, teddy bears in my teens was the gift that I did not want. No, I did not want. My memory of Christmas bad gifts was my mum got two CDs from sanity. And she gave my brother the 12th man, which was I loved the 12th man. I like the 12th man, yeah. It's a comedy CD for those you don't know. Yeah.

Every Christmas someone, got the 12th man but i remember me so fucking mad because my mom gave my brother and she goes and for you she got me justin timberlake's bringing sexy back album and i remember being like what do you think i am i was like are you are you saying i'm gay that's what i remember thinking i'm i'm i hate justin timberlake to this day because of that i'm sure every time i think about i go fucking justin tibble like why would i want to listen to that i'm bringing sexy bad What's up with Justin Tim Lake? Does he still tour and stuff?

He got done DUI this year, actually. I know he got done DUI, but like, is he still? I think he's, I think he's Finita. And remember he gave up his acting career? He acted for five minutes. Yeah, he acted for five minutes, yeah. He's kind of like one of the big falloffs. He was huge.

I don't think he needs, I don't think he needs to do anything. I also had rich cousins who, I remember, I'd always spend Christmas in their house. I think, I think in sync are going to do a tour next year, their final comeback tour, and then that's going to be that. Okay. And my last question for you is a Christmas morning. You're the first one to get to the Bluetooth speaker. The kids are on their way down the stairs.

You don't think I know how to use a Bluetooth speaker. You're hilarious. Sure, you don't know how to use a Bluetooth speaker. What song do you put on? Okay, so I have a lovely record player that I can't use until my son is old enough to stop putting his finger in the fucking speakers. So you know, these things fucking bashed in, like that. So this record player has paper speakers, which actually gives some of the best noise, the cardboard type of thing. And

the kid has ruined the speakers when he was a baby. And so I'm about two, three years away from being able to start playing records on that and again. But before that, I like to put on an actual LP. And I have an LP in my house that I bring out, and I put it on and I put the needle down and I'm the only person who's into it, a very Kylie Christmas. Yeah, I know your brother's into it. I get Kylie Minogue, just so we have a bit of Australia, just so we have a bit of Australia. The singing budgies, they call it, the tall poppy syndrome.

I put on Kylie Christmas. But apart from that, I like my favourite Christmas carols. Look, Felice Navadar is something that I've picked up later on in life that I found. when I moved over here, which we were commenting on when we're in Ireland, everyone knows that now. Spotify,

the whole world knows for least never that. I think is a banger. I like, Meli, Mickey Marco is the thing to say on a bride Hawaiian Christmas.

I personally, Joy to the world by Alva Maria, I love the Vienna Boys Choir, but it's got to be boys. Oh, Vienna Boys Quaid. Okay.

I need, because I need Kostrati singing. They can't have testicles. There's two, there's two fucking songs. that from my years living in the UK Hold on my computer's going to die Just hold a second

Talk to the audience There's two songs from the UK That are from the time that I lived there Do you know this one Jack Well I wish it could be Christmas Every day Where the bells are spinning And the world begin to play

Well that song Um And then the other one from Slade It's Christmas Does he hang a tiny sucking on the wall Does he have a red nose reindeer That song You know that song?

Yes That song's a banger That song I can listen And also I tell you what I don't mind I like a bit of war is over by John Lennon But I can get involved with a bit of A bit of Band-Aid

It's Christmas time There's no need to be afraid A bit of thinking about people in Africa starving I enjoy it I had the I had You know like I had the Latin chanting I had the Latin chanting carols

drummed into me as a child Yeah because you're fucking your bloody Greek aren't you So you know You all sit there and you listen to your Greek music. Right, Ave Maria, delivered by a boy without testicles. This is the thing. This is the thing.

It's all, everything you listen to is religious. That's a big, big weight on it. Check. All right. that must make the hair on your back stick up. No, I like joy to the world out of all of those. Hark the heritage. Oh, the Germans, you know what they love is O'Tanenbaum.

And when we go, oh, tanenbaum, oh, tanenbaum. And then they set fire to this little piece of paper. And it goes, and it lights up all the real candles in the Christmas tree. They have actual flames inside a Christmas tree. Insanity. But the deciduous tree, it's very green. It can't burn. They reckon, I don't fucking know.

It's a fucking brilliant, the German Christmas. Yeah, I'm looking forward to it. Jimmy Boy, like I said, I'm going to love with the family. Well, I wish it could be Christmas every day. I like fun songs. You like fucking miserable, fucking dramatic, fucking European, marching people off into war music. I like all that.

However, I do also love Paul McCartney's. I don't know. I've always loved that. Simply having wonderful Christmas time. It's a bit of fun because, yeah, because John Lennon's songs always like, like, like, it's Christmas. These ones like, war is over if you, and Paul McCanty's like this, presents and stuff. Have all the good time. Having a good time.

We'll have some fun and so will I simply. And then he's like this, for the rich and the poor ones, the world is so wrong. Maybe you'll get a scooter or a porco stick. Toy helicopter's crashed. That's what always happens. Shouldn't have bought that cheap shit from China again. Yeah, man. Well, I'm going to have a good one.

I'm going to have a good one. I'll go to skiing in Vienna. But I will say I'm going to miss my Aussie. I'm due an Aussie Christmas for sure. And I will certainly. I miss the I miss the I do you know what it is it's it's also having a cold beer versus a mold wine

there's something about fuck mold wine exactly you know what I mean just this whole I'm going to have a warm fucking drink because it's cold I'm going to finish it off with egg no and then in Australia that's just that what have you got boys that noise just dad and also

also like what do you leave out Santa what do you leave out Santa what traditionally growing up yeah we'd leave it we'd leave a beer carrots and cookies

the carrots are for the reindeer they're not for Santa but yeah you leave a cookies yeah we're beer carrot and cookies

yeah that's the whole thing there's a video I found when I was 11 although since I've gotten sober Santa wants a really cold milk with these cookies I got a

I found video you just agree to me when I I was about 11. I remember putting on home video footage and my parents filmed something on Christmas night and my parents divorced when I was seven. So I remember being like, oh, this is so,

look at this, this is mum and dad. And the video was, my dad's got the home video, as dads always did. You remember, like, there was always one dad with the home video area. Your dad was probably too old. No, my parents recorded nothing. Yeah, my dad was always the guy

at every family function. You don't get that on iPhone? You remember, like, no one with an iPhone walks around the party constantly filming, and that's Cousin Allie. Say hello, Ali. And then Ali will just be set like that. I know. There is something about,

Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas. Mid-90s footage of family members just sort of being filmed like they're the starting lineup of a football team where everyone had to do something. There'd be one cousin that would do a weird thing. Someone would go, Yeah. And, like, you'd think, like, what am I going to do when the camera comes?

When Uncle Rowan comes to me, I'll be like. Yeah, and then the camera goes, come over here, come over here. And then your grandma's like this. And then that has absolutely passed out. Or spouting off Chinese people everywhere now. And you're like, I remember my grandmother, grandmother Mavis, my dad's mom. She would, she'd beck and she'd get the wine. She'd get on the liquor.

And she'd get fucking, she's starting to pass out. the glass would be dropping and my dad's gone to scotty goes scotty go go get your grandmother's glass there right right and uh and so scott went just before it spilled he was a little kid and he went over and he grabbed it he got it and he went oh like that and she looked up and she goes ah thank you scotty you got me a glass of wine was the same glass of wine when you're a kid that's fucking gold she was a he was a fucking banger she used to and cook, everything that she cooked had red wine in it.

It was always like, glag, glag, glick, leg, leg, get the food. By the end of it, it needs to be braged over three hours. Oh, that's what I was saying about the footage. So my dad is filming my mom

and she's putting presents under there, the tree. And it's just my dad doing this. Hello, Santa. You're looking good this year, Santa. You've dropped a bit away. Mrs. Claus is here, is she?

Oh. And he's like, and my mom, I remember, he's wearing like a sweater. and my dad's like filming her legs and he's like this not bad where's my presence oh the kids are got theirs where's my presence but because i grew up in a broken family and we had no video footage that's all i've got of my parents together which is basically the beginning of their sex tape and my brother and i watched that and go oh we used to be together once that's all we've got the camera gets put onto a coffee table just facing a wall

and then you hear that come on i'm trying to wrap things come on Put a bow around this. There will be kids in the future generation where the only video footage they have that are the parents is the sex tape they find on their dad's phone. That's fucked up. That's a terrible thought.

Anyway, Merry Christmas. Merry Christmas, everyone. And thanks for watching our podcast. We hope you have a wonderful Christmas Hanukkah, whatever that fake black one is. What's that, Kwanza? Kwanza. You celebrate how you want to

celebrate and have fun. Hey, guys, it's Kamel Anjiani. My new stand-up special Night Thoughts is now streaming on Hulu. I promise you're going to laugh. I am an immigrant. Are there any other immigrants here? Okay, what you can't do is point at someone else. My thoughts is now streaming on Hulu and Hulu on Disney Plus for bundle subscribers.

Terms apply. That wasn't my call. If it was my call, terms would not apply, but it's not my call.