If I Were You - 255: Smile (w/Billy and Adam!)

Episode Date: January 23, 2017

Friends and fellow HeadGum podcasters Billy and Adam join us to discuss virginity, anxiety, and how to change the world.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum podcast. There's just one little problem I think that she wants me dead I keep finding all these papers They will plan an attack This girl's been nothing but coy to me Is she gonna stab me in the back? Do you have any suggestions?

Should I hit it and quit? No matter what you say I'm probably gonna go for it If I were you If I were you I'd tell you what I would do If only I were If only I were you

Who's 18 And would love a shout out to his band They're on YouTube They're on SoundCloud Like a den in the sea Not like a sedan Like Ursula's living My uncle Dan goes swimming

That's a sedan He only goes swimming and drives a coupe A two door sport Billy and Adam in the house They're back and better than ever When was the last time you guys were on the show? When was that, Bill? We just started the podcast

So maybe a little less than a year ago The episode was called Olive Oil Yeah, we talked about masturbating with Olive Oil Billy, this is your third time on our show Adam's second The first time you were on the show We went to McDonald's and we got a flay of fish And my stomach just started to feel normal today

That was a great day I remember having a great day with you guys It's funny because now we're recording Now you just brought donuts So it's like some sort of theme in our lives Where we eat foods that are bad for us There was that half piece of cheese on a donut That was the fish donut

That was just the fish donut They just squished white fish That was like a Boston cream donut Except with fucking fish I got you the Boston cream and I got a mirror the white fish A white fish donut It seems anti-semitic that you got me that Of course

Why did you give me the white fish? If we say white fish donut one more time It's going to be appetizing for me We've already started to want it That's Adam's fantasy basketball team White fish donut I was a big gefilte fish addict Oh really?

Huge gefilte fish addict You needed it I needed it He legitimately needed it Everyone in my life was repulsed and disgusted By my pension for gefilte fish And then even more so by your withdrawal Exactly, or withdrawal symptoms

Yeah, they detoxed you for a month You were throwing up piles Take me to the Hannaforts Yeah, it was really bad I actually have the caters The two lovely Israeli caters make me the bar mitzvah boy My own individual plate of just gefilte fish But I ate alone in silence

Yeah, this is the fish for the public And this is Sir Adam's fish This is the new man's fish Nobody gets my fish, papa You're like Veruca kosher salt Just like a very well-to-do Jewish gentleman boy Exactly

Adam told me one thing about gefilte fish Which is that it's the only fish in the supermarket That doesn't need to be refrigerated Red flag Oh, it's in the cereal aisle But that's fish But that's fish though It's next to the peanut butter

From the sea to aisle 7 Seriously, exactly You can just eat it right out of the bag That they bag it in its grossest order Astronauts bring it to outer space It's so gross Fruit loops, gefilte fish And then over there in the refrigerated section

Is the real fish Gefilte fish does have a cereal mascot It does, doesn't it? Gilly the nervous fish Oh, jeans He swims in jeans Only fish that wears jeans in the lake Solid app

Solid app so far We are out of time, but thank you guys so much for coming Once again, check out the no-joke podcast Super fun That's where we can get them This is our podcast The only advice podcast on the internet hosted by Jake and I Sometimes we're by ourselves

Sometimes we're our friends Hello, headgum, podcasters Billy and Adam You guys have your own show on our network We do, it's called no-joke Which is the day between Thursday and Saturday Oh, that's a good sandwich To Jake and I's show

It's like we got the Monday show We're the bread, I would say And the rest of the podcast would be I would say the white fish In the donut So unlike your podcast Here, we're basically trying to advise people Out of their sticky situations

People will email us, they're confused, they're scared They want to know what 31 to 35 year old White people think About their situation Who doesn't? Who doesn't? Who does not? Who does not want that? Who's 35 in this room? Me. You're 35? Good man. Thank you.

Look at Corkin's twin Yeah, true I can't wait to be 35 Yeah, a second 35 looks good on you, Bill You could be president, that's the year You should be president You know what, maybe I will be president

Are we okay with that by the way? 35 is the floor, right? You have to be at least 35? Yeah. Wow What if there's like a 27 year old genius Who is like clearly the best president? I'm fine with the floor, I actually think there should be a ceiling I don't think you should be able to I said this to you guys before, I don't think you should be able to

Vote after 65 I think 65, you can't be president anymore either You're on the way out brother You need to take a driver's test Same thing, when you turn like 50, 60, 70 Every 10 years you have to pass a driving test again You should not be grandfathered into Assuming you're safe

When you're 80 taking your driving test They actually just drive the car off a cliff It maps the end of your life He passed Thump The new Rams head coach Los Angeles Rams head coach 30, that's silly man

He'd be the youngest one in this room How could you do that? There's definitely people on the team that are older than me For sure I would say most of the team is over 30 I don't know what football, I guess it's a young He's a millennial, he rides his bike I guess the front line is all over 30

Yes, exactly The fast people are in meetings As they should be I'm trying to find the best question to start with Here's a good one, this will set us on our way Adam, why don't we get a fake guy's name? How about Tad William Smith

That's pretty good William Smith Is there a hyphen? William Smith His maiden name is William He took his wife's name Smith Tad William Smith Very progressive

Here's the deal, I'm currently doing a year-long service program In a new city and the program set me up With two worst roommates I've ever had in my life It's not that they have any annoying habits Or that they don't clean or anything It's not even that they're not good people They're both also involved in a year of service And genuinely seem like they want to make the world

A better place The problem is that I just hate being around them For whatever reason our personalities don't mesh They constantly annoy the shit out of me For just being who they are Awesome So I guess I just need some advice on how to survive Seven more months of this shit

Have you ever had shit roommates? Side note, I don't think this plays a big part But just for context, I'm a man and they're both women Oh jeez Tough little addendum there Every neighborhood has crazy neighbors And if yours doesn't, you're the crazy neighbor Yeah

And my dude, you're the weird one They don't like you You're the weird one, turn the mirror around my man Perhaps Have you guys ever had shit roommates is the first question I personally have been fortunate enough To always be able to essentially choose my roommates Same

Oh no, in college I did have a shitty roommate I should take that back My freshman year roommate was a bit of an asshole He was a weird guy from Philadelphia He was just persnickety and didn't like me having friends Over even though college is a time for friends This is what he told them It's kind of a big part of it

This is time for friends, no? So he was sort of a prick He was a prick, but other than that My roommate, I've been kind of at a thousand with roommates For the most part This dude hasn't said one thing about his roommates I don't have any advice on how to solve it They sound like the most ideal

Their personalities don't clash Or don't click It just sounds like Tad is a misanthrope You just don't like people, Tad I don't think you might not like other human beings Yeah, is that what that means? Just try to relate to them on something He might love them

The problem is he might love them And he's pretending like he's not Has anybody ever done a 180 like that in your life Where you hated him and then you're like You just view him in a different lens And now I think I like this person I've never taken someone out of the hate pile Into the love

It seems like it only goes the other way I like this person, and now I no longer like him And now I no longer like that person You go back People go from one pile to the other daily Yeah So fickle, Jake I hated you at the top

That's exactly the passion Sometimes you shine The light on the world with someone you love And then sometimes you spin the spotlight at you Want to burn them to death Kev, can you name someone That you used to hate that you're now really close with? Marty

Oh, interesting What about you guys? Marty as well First impression, first time I met Marty I was like this dude's just going to be up my ass This dude's trouble Why did Jake and Amir bring him on to Head Gum They were doing fine with that dangerous boy

My girlfriend Maggie often gets upset at me Because I do try to employ that tactic Of just like pretend you like them Just pretend And then ultimately like your habit will form If you lied to yourself enough Just say, just pretend that you like them Just make believe until it's real

This is you telling her to do that Or is this about you? I do that myself and she's like I think you're a false man I think that means you're a false man That's genuinely the way you feel If I don't like something like Why exist in that sort of like You sound perturbed at, you sound annoyed

Here's a way out of it, just trick Dumb yourself down enough that you can trick yourself To like it a little That really is true If you have one conversation with them Where you like, just like laugh and smile And pretend you care about what they like Build on that

Then you really do, you walk away Even if you don't remember the substance Of the conversation, you walk away and you're like I was smiling I think I was happy then My body's in joy mode Because like two years later, you're definitely not going to remember Any substance of the conversation you had with anyone

All you're going to remember is the vague sensation Of joy that you had, whether it was true or fabricated Or vague sensation of hate That's all And you didn't like that person It's as simple as Smile when you're talking to them Seriously, you will dilute yourself

Into thinking you are having fun It's a reverse brain thing When I'm happy, I smile So if I'm smile, will that then Force happy? Yes, really If you just smile You trick yourself into being happy

We're just dumb mammals We can trick ourselves, we just have silly little brains We can do it, we can do it ourselves I'm smiling right now and I'm kind of happy Yeah, and I hate myself Okay, that's a good technique Just fake the shit out of it until it becomes real Or they move out

My girlfriend Marina does voiceover work And usually if the copy asks For optimism or like a Hopeful voice The trick is to smile while you're reading All of the copy because It just becomes, your voice literally changes Everything in your body changes

But if you walk in on somebody doing that voiceover With a crazy clown smile and talking about Like Downey's air fresheners It's crazy But smile So smile is the Advice here How about smile

Exactly That's not bad, seven months of smiles Just pretend Sounds like seven months of smiles will drive a man crazy too Yeah, you don't want to smile too much Seven months of smiles Because it could be that happiness is finite The serotonin in your brain will eventually run out

And you wasted it being fake nice But GNC sells serotonin So You can literally Are you selling us MDMA right now? Exactly, people who take ecstasy a lot They flood their brains with serotonin And the next day they are very depressed

Because they used up all of their serotonin But the smart ecstasy users Will go to GNC And literally buy the things that pump serotonin Yeah, the HTTP5 Is that what it is? You're thinking It's something like that

HTTP5 That's like the serotonin thing It works pretty slow You really want to kill yourself in the morning You should really take ecstasy With this serotonin Just take ecstasy Always take ecstasy

That way you won't be able to not smile You're going to love it anyway Exactly Here's a lady From Australia Billy, do you have a name for an Australian lady? Patricia Exactly

Patricia Williams Smith No relation We just used the same phone book Not even vaguely Straight to the point I'll be 23 this year And I'm still a virgin Part of me wants to not care

And follow the feminist belief that virginity is just a concept Made up by men to make them feel that Their dick is important enough to change a girl's life The other part of me Just wants some dick But I've realized that due to my anxiety disorder Intimacy will always freak me out To the point where I haven't even kissed someone

In over two years Do you ever find intimacy nerve-wracking? If so, any tips? If not, is there any shame In being well on my way to a real life 40-year-old version? Tota, all the love Patricia Williams Smith

Intimacy, does it ever make me nervous? Not only, of course I think you'd have to be a robot if intimacy didn't make you nervous In some way Well, I imagine if you're single Intimacy starts to become a little more a la carte Which then I would probably feel that way But once you start falling into a relationship

Intimacy almost starts becoming more of a fun Kind of a game that you can play Where you know it's a very safe place It's less embarrassing I feel like once you can get to that point The sex positive perspective Sorry, Amir A very supportive feminist

In me, says A, live your whole life a virgin, no one cares There's no stigma against that No one cares if you have sex or not It's all in your own head Truly no one cares That's a good point, well said, Adam If you want sex, have all the sex

If you want dick as you so poetically put it Go get that dick Go get it This is the first time I ever heard that Men made up the concept of virginity Their dick is so important It can change a woman's life I don't understand

When did you lose your virginity Because I can make you do that with my dick I can give you that fucking bar mitzvah Right, I guess That sort of makes sense You can only lose your virginity If somebody fucks you And I got the secret key

It's my dick and I can take that virginity Guys can be virgins too And they can't be unvirgins unless a girl Is the secret key Being a vagina Another boy's butt Well, I mean You still need the receiver

Yeah, now we're getting into What is sex Is it penis and vagina Or is it butt and vagina The butt goes into the vagina The A to B The A to A What do you guys do outside

I stuck my butt in your vagina The little pink eye Everything, the whole cheek I'm falling into a toilet bowl That is such a Wide, wide vagina To allow the entire buttocks to enter It's so rare

I grew up in Long Island Where Goons, Goon Central And it's a place where you would think That dudes would be like my dick can change lives I grew up with the dudes Who would be cast to say that line No one in my friend group would ever be caught dead Saying that and no one in my friend group believed

That their dick could change lives I mean like To Jake's point, I've never Heard that sentiment Outside of maybe like a big dumb movie jock I think my dick could mildly improve A life for a short amount of time If somebody consented

To it And it was a nice time for everyone And then their life would probably recede back to normal Of course Mild improvement and a vagina or A butt could do that You know that story When a car flips over and lands on a baby

And someone comes in and lifts the car Like if someone's dick lifted that car That's a life changing dick That dick literally changed a person's life By the way you only ever hear about the ones that are able to lift the car There's plenty of babies that are just crushed under the car Swished baby syndrome Didn't have enough adrenaline

Did you mommy? I got the car and itch off the ground Which is more than I could do normally I can feel you make a failure that you didn't lift a car off of your child I can absolutely see myself In this scenario For some reason it's on a bridge In my mind

Always on a bridge and the car flips And it's on the baby but the baby's still alive And I would literally think to myself Okay Billy this is literally what you've been training for your whole life You're the guy that saves this baby What if you flip the car off the baby And it landed on a bunch of other babies Four babies

Shit That was my one rip max I really can't But you have to re-flip it Roll it off the bridge Is it the opposite where you're strong enough to lift a car But the adrenaline actually saps you of energy You become weaker with adrenaline

That would be a really disappointing You gotta become cool and collected You know one time I did Rip open a car door after a car accident In Los Angeles It was actually by Catalyst Where we all worked Santa Monica-ish

Remember how there was always Where those roads met There was just a lot of left hand turns Where people getting smashed into one another And I worked out of Catalyst once And a person had literally just been Smashed and their door was In and out and you could tell they were in a state of panic

And I was like five steps away And I just grabbed it and just yanked The door open and they climbed out And it was amazing It was a total hero moment I mean the door was already open But I did give it that extra couple of inches That story really goes nowhere

But I'd like to think I could lift the car off the bridge I think you probably could Your friend Steve lifted a smart car And just moved it with his hands My friends are goons It was a fiat Yeah, yeah He just moved a car with his hands

That was his bar prank We'd go out into the parking lot And find the smallest car What are you talking about dragging it Like by what? By the two wheels that aren't in break Or in park, there was a fiat The famous one is the fiat

So lift up the bumper from the back Yeah, cause the engine's in the front so it's a little heavier And then he would just grab it and we would push the front And we would move it to the other side of the parking lot Just moving cars with your hands This is Long Island The other point man for Long Island is Gabriel And he's 500 pounds

And he eats everything and moves everything He's a fiat He's a fiat 500 Have you seen Gabriel's tattoo? I have, Long Island Would you ever get that? I would not It's a map of the island?

It is definitely cool, I would not Just because you're anti-tattoo? I'm not anti-tattoo I love Long Island But it's also the type of place that you're there for two days And you're like you gotta go, you gotta get out of here fast So you don't want to constantly see it on your bye You want to say bye to the bye?

Her question about the dick Any tips about If you find intimacy nerve-wracking It seems to me that it's a trust thing The more comfortable you get with someone You shouldn't rush it, go on as many dates as possible Until you feel completely comfortable allowing this person To be intimate with you

Maybe that'll lead to less anxiety And don't be afraid to tell that person That you're anxious about intimacy Because then they will If they're a good person be a lot more sensitive To your anxiety And I imagine she might She might attract someone who

Might have similar feelings as well She doesn't seem like a one night stand type of person I would say that you should try and find a friend Who you might be able to turn that into more That'd be nice Best of luck Patricia Best of luck Patricia Let's take a break

Let's take a quick little break And then we'll be back with more questions and answers With Billy and Adam, right? A brief questionnaire And get matched with a licensed therapist And you can switch therapists at any time For no additional charge It's incredibly helpful therapy has helped

Millions of people Over thousands of years So give therapy a try It can give you the tools to find a more balanced life I've tried therapy, it's been very helpful So you can find that balance Better with better help All you gotta do is go to betterhelp.com

If I were you So the prices are already affordable Cause you're not paying rent for a building somewhere That you have to drive to And wait in a waiting room This is done entirely online But you're still getting professional Licensed help

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Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks Thanks I would never listen to anybody who just told me I'm wrong blindly and like walked away from it right so my my position with everybody who I loved before the election and I will still probably love after the election despite Who they voted for because they're more complicated than just this one vote is

What can I how can I speak to them because they already respect me? We have a friendship where we're a family members. They already respect me and what I believe that's already been established How can I talk to them from just like my perspective on the matter and not project on to them? Why they're wrong, but rather like Maybe you don't know about conversion therapy Like let's just out like let's maybe you don't know about that like that's something that like Really like gets me uncomfortable like when the like future vice-president and I'll say that to a few people few people And they'll be like what conversion therapy like Mike Pence what right and so I can't assume that every

Trump voter or person who disagrees with me is a bad person or should be cut out of my life That's right. But what I take on the personal responsibility now of trying to slow things down and create more dialogue and less debate Because debate is how we became these two everyone just argued online to the point where it's like I know who you're voting for you know, I'm voting for and we're both gonna yell in a vacuum until the elections, right? Right, so I'm just trying to build little bridges that hopefully when in two years local elections start happening And in four years bigger elections start happening those bridges have already been built just enough so that like if I do put out like a slightly More political stance somewhere people already know where I'm coming. Yeah, I get Jake I get you're like if you do that like it's a disqual it's like a D

Non-edibility fire. I totally get that I feel that way too to a certain degree One thing my girlfriend Maggie has done in an effort to sort of like be a little more diplomatic and kind of the icebreaker That she will use to sort of gently ease into the conversation is like what news? How do you get your news like where do you get your information like what news sources? Do you read like what newspapers or what where do you get your information because it is a I mean? I feel like that is like so much at the core of what is so fucked about all this Is it like we can't even really agree on fact right like empirical scientific fact? Well, it's like limited knowledge where with the thing that I'm putting in and getting out

They're not even getting the input from that they're getting inputs from somewhere else. That's right so to me that would be What I would be most curious about and I think would be a non to feather roughly way to sort of like ease into a conversation about values and about Information and knowledge that is that you can sort of back off of the contempt that you have for people who you disagree with Which I completely understand. Yeah, everybody should definitely listen to you, too. I Cannot get over my resentment. I know somebody I just find it unforgivable here. Maybe I'll work towards it But that's what makes me so upset I think that it's like you have to address and I talked my sister at length about this where it's like

Until we are not like we the four of us and the people who are like and this girl who's Dealing with this problem until we have like taken off the raw edge of it all like we're all still very Emotionally raw right now and we're all very like coming out of a traumatic experience And you have to ask yourself am I in a position to be part of this conversation with my best friend Am I going to be in a healthy enough mind space that I'm not gonna actually Screw up what I already believe because I'm so emotional And so it's like if you can find limo a Miranda says that you need to like eat your vegetables But also like have your dessert, too

And so there's like you kind of need to like find what you were made you happy before the election and like live in that a little bit just that you can normalize yourself so that when you are ready to have bigger conversations that might go one of two ways You can at least be sure that you are levelheaded in this That's why I feel like if she's asking me what to do this specific bringing it back to this question I wouldn't necessarily have their Conversation before the trip I would let the trip exist in this ignorant blissful bubble have fun with your friend And then later on find out all this stuff why they think that way and if you're more curious than angry like Understanding the root of her thoughts or maybe it's as simple as like I just don't like Hillary because this that and the other

Yeah, she doesn't necessarily think that she's like purporting or supporting this yeah specifically racist sex as human right But that's my just like avoid it all together on the vacation and then later be like oh, by the way, I might hate you That's right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it comes it comes down to the question being should they do it the beginning of the trip to get out of the way or Do it at the end of the trip. Yeah, I think I think beginning of the trip trumps end of the trip trumps Second that distant second cousins, I'm telling you he's getting his claws in you Jake Oh Dude the conversion therapy work

I could totally see another way I meant I see the value in both strategies Oh, what would you do if you if it were you if I were if it were me Oh, I like to think I would have the courage and the strength to be like I'm pretty upset with you and I want to have a great time But I want you to know I'm upset because I'm an honest adult, but I probably would never But then it's like the swing thing every single good every single good thing you do on this trip you add a lot You're like, oh shit. Yeah. Yeah, I still have to have a really hard

Exactly trip so you get it out of the way first and then and New York's such a great distraction You guys will forget they had the argument all the pizza. Hopefully or I mean, I was gonna say pizza like Lombardi's is a good pizza is a good I If at any point an awkward moment arise where maybe you started to dip your toe into politics You can just look at each other and just say pizza pizza pizza Lady and the tramp each other so close They just the that's the unity right there

Billy I would have the conversation in advance, but I would know what I was going to say on the phone I wouldn't pick like dial her without knowing exactly what I wanted to say I would just have like a plan in mind so that I didn't go off the rails and then I was speaking from an emotional place Yeah, I want to speak from like here's how I feel you were my best friend before this You'll still be my best friend after this but that being said here's how I feel I don't pass judgment on you because I already have it. Do you have any really close friends that voted for DJ T? Yeah, my best friend. Oh, the same guy who was ripping phone books and You know, I spoke to him immediately after and I was like dude

This is why I voted for and and I was like, you know And he has he like basically grew up in the inner city with like nothing but minorities like the inner city portion of my town like he was literally raised by no parents like Latino neighbors and all these different people and He works in a union and he doesn't read the news and he just gets this like big mass produced this is what we do in this town and He just doesn't care enough and that's not I like it bit us in the ass But he doesn't care enough to really question authority because like he has his life in place and so as his best friend I'm the one outlet. I'm literally the one person right who can potentially put a like a crack in this stone

And just be like, hey, listen, you trust me. I know that so this is why I voted for this person Just consider these things and like let me be a person of political advice Maybe next time around if you have questions like maybe it could be me and I made inroads on a lot of Long Island Hardheads a lot a lot and so it was like that actually brought me a lot of like calm after the storm which was like, okay This is my personal responsibility. Yeah, it's localized and it's small But I'm a well enough speaker and well respected enough in this community that I've always kind of gone against the grain of what these people do They'll continue to listen to me in some capacity. I should run for office out there, man. It's really You're three you can be president diplomatic without being condescending is a hard line to walk

I don't know how to do it. Yeah, I have the same impulse as you Jake to shame, which is only to shame Like I want to say to every Trump voter. How dare you right, right? So that's my impulse completely, but I also acknowledge the truth that Billy is espousing, which is It's sort of that can tight that can Reinforce the divide. I want I want Billy on the front line. I do not want to be out there in the trenches converting people I want to be huddled up with my people saying fuck those guys. We need you on our team We need Ryder dies on our team make no mistake. Jake. We need an army. Yes Responsibility pardon. What do you think about that nickname?

responsibility Kind of came out of left field. It wasn't really prepared for a nickname test or responsibility Neutral I guess my answer be neutral neutral is a great starting point. Oh, that's just responsibility people wouldn't That's kind of cool, and then we can shorten it eventually to Billy Short for responsibility our Billy T Billy T. Williams All right, cool. That was a fun real way to end this show. Why don't you tell us about your podcast really quick in case people

Want more Billy and Adam? How do they get it? You go to the head gum network you subscribe on iTunes The show is called the no joke podcast. It's one topic. We have three acts They are our past our current and our future lives with that topic Yep, and it is as silly as this episode with you guys is it usually goes right off the rails Yep, sometimes you have a guest sometimes we don't we've been on the show I've been on the show individually absolutely have indeed Ben Schreit did a show. Yep Then she was one here. Yeah. Yeah, we had one of the try guys from Buzzfeed on recently Maybe Hart and Grace Helbig. Yeah, we uh, I listened to the fitness episode, which is really great, too

Okay, just to hear you two talk about the completely opposite viewpoints of working out Yes, Adam who's never been in a gym. I don't think you've ever left He's doing Billy taught me about super sets. Do you know about that? Yeah, yeah, my brother taught me about him Basically doing instead of rest you do another set. Yeah, there is no rest So in between sets, which is when you're supposed to be resting don't do that. It's yeah, it's just doing a harder work It's like when you're done with a meal just continue eating until your next meal constantly be nibbling on a saltine I don't think I mean I had that shake today. That's 50 right there 50 grams of protein I have Amir and Ben I'm training them five days a week at the gym good and they have committed to the system

I'm I'm I'm two weeks straight. They are off days five days a week in the gym And they're consuming a hundred grams of protein per my request every day very good Billy told me that he eats a box of pasta today. Yeah, that was pretty funny. I know that I know that's usually with a couple of chicken breasts That's true. Yeah This is all true a college freshman diet just forever. I mean Michael Phelps did it so I'm gonna try yeah 10,000 calorie days. Why not? You're burning it. You're definitely burning it. Yeah Great, so no joke podcast on the head gum network If you have any any of your own questions or theme song submissions the email address for everything every single thing

Is if I were you show at gmail.com Opening theme song was written by Jeremy this closing one is written by David I want to see if he had anything that he wanted me to say about him If you guys wanted to talk about more pizza places to get in New York while I look that up Oh, you know what? I really like a hungover pizza pie from Vinnie's Bedford in Brooklyn But get like they're weird shit like the tater tot bacon cheese pizza tater. Baby. I have barbecue chicken cutlet pizza Chicken, but I'm still not mad at the dollar pizza the place that like straight-up promotes

Yeah, yeah, two pizza bros or something. Yeah, they're pizzas like pretty rocks off Yes, the entire alphan omega of the New York City pizza culture is that 14th and first There's artichoke pizza on one side, which is like fancy bullshit It's like barbecue chicken delicious $7 a slice right right across the street pizza bros 99 cent You know where you find We are the pizza bros everything. What was the There's these Coney Island the hot dog places Yes, no, no, not Nathan's you're thinking of the place. It was on 72nd Grace Papaya. Yes. Oh, Grace Papaya

It's just like a local New York establishment. Yeah, and they've I think like there's only like two or three left There's they have fries. There's one there's one on 14th and 2nd. Yes. Yes. That was the second one But they would have like the $2 special or 250 special you get two hot dogs and a soda Yes, or one of their juices for 250 and like any 14th and 2nd serving $1 hot dogs. Yeah, the landlord and hot dog All right, so this closing theme song is written by David Nakman who's on SoundCloud David Nakman with a K Great and two ends at the end. All right. There you have it. Oh, David Nakman. Thanks to David and Jeremy David Nakman's got a Nakman

Thank you for having us on your podcast dudes. Thank you for coming on the show Thank you very very much for having us. We'll be back next week David Nakman on the track Yeah, yeah, yeah, Jake and Amir got a podcast email in your questions and they put you on blast It's just these koi two Jews or they might have a guest on plus They got a bunch of people doing podcasts for head gum worldwide. Yeah, they're coming to Australia Bitch cuz that's where Jake is sure to get his genitalia licked Yeah

Miss her wits, please turn on the podcast They'll help you out your predicament shows every Monday, bitch. We know that you're listening That was a hit gun podcast