If I Were You - 456: VOTE
Episode Date: October 8, 2020In this Bonus Thursday episode we discuss moles, grind guards, and how to vote!Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information....
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This is a head gum original.
Speak up cause you got something to say
You know the thing you said you'd never do
Do it anyway
That's what I would do
If I were you
When life gets too crazy
Stick together and we'll make it baby
You asked and that's what I would do
If I were you
Whoa
Damn
Oh my god
I loved that song
Was that a cover?
The theme songs? No
I was gonna say the theme songs are getting better
That's no parody, no cover
Just an original diddy
And not only that
But this guy would like to remain anonymous
He has no shout outs
Yeah
Tell me who it is
That riff is so fucking good
I loved it
It was me
I wanted to know if it wasn't you
It wasn't you
Fuck, alright
Okay, so sorry
Now yeah, you
This guy wrote an incredible theme song
One that you thought was so good
Thank you
And then was humble enough to want to remain anonymous
And at some point you decided to take the glory for yourself
Take credit
This guy deserves a hero
To have a face attached to the song
And this is that face
You have the worst face
You have the worst face I've ever seen on a zoom
He says he would like to know if his singing voice is annoying
I have written a collection of songs
And want to put out an album
But I'm self-conscious about my voice
Is it too nasally? Do I sound too shouty?
Would you listen to approximately 30 minutes on a streaming platform?
Thank you
Yes, I would
And I think that you could almost tell that he was shy about his voice
Because he wasn't, he didn't turn it up
As much as like the guitar
Which fucking ruled
I loved that riff so much
I'll say it again
But I think
Too nasally
No
Too shouty
Actually
So you just like pinpointed the two things that he asked about
Which are clearly the stuff that he's most insecure about
Because that's why he brought it up
So you think nasally and shouty
Shouty, yeah
They're shouty
You forget what it is
You're just trying to needle him
You don't even have that opinion about the music
That's a no from me dog
Nice, Randy
Who?
Forget it
No, it's great
It sounds like a real song
You're killing it, whoever you are
Awesome job
Great work
100%
Three thumbs up
You're doing great
Honestly, I would use that instrumental in like a film, I think
Mmm
Yeah, it's a great like upbeat and or montage song
Yeah, actually bro, will you send that back with just the fucking riff, the instrumental?
I have
An idea
An idea
I have a high idea for it
Yeah, that's what I want
Anyway, we're back on a Thursday and sorry if this trophy is getting in the way
That's right
This trophy that I'm holding
It says luck
No, it says fuck actually
Does it really?
No
Okay
What is that? It's a go kart trophy?
It's a Mario Kart trophy
Quite frankly
And you see the names on it
These are the people that have won every season of this tournament of champions
Who's the first one? Squeaky?
Squeaky
Who's squeaky?
Squeaky is the first season's champ
Sorry, you're coming in here with like
Do you know these people?
I don't have to know them, they're Mario Kart friends of mine
They have your address to mail you shit?
No, they don't
How did it get there?
Season two
How long ago was Tyson?
Yeah, Tyson, and then it looks like
Season three
Yeah, season one and season three
And then back to Squeaky and S4
That's right
And then five was Bloominfeld
How long ago was five by the way?
Because I just want to make sure you're not hoarding the trophy past the point where you're allowed
No, five just ended, that's why I got this trophy, that's why I'm showing it to you
It's a Mario Kart trophy, that's right
I won my tournament, it's a five week per season thing
Organized by Ben Schwartz, the tournament of champions
I practiced hard and I took home the hardware
Much like LeBron will be doing soon
So just wanted to quick shout out to me, quick shout out to the Lakers, two champions
Quick shout out to yourself
If you wanted to shout me out, that's fine too
Kind of neat
How does the season work?
How does the season work?
Don't worry about the nitty gritty
I have the trophy
It goes five weeks per month
Per season
So we've done 20 weeks
Basically since quarantine started
Okay
Yeah, so every Saturday we race
Well, we do two eight race heats
So 16 races every week
For five weeks, that's one season
And we've done 25 weeks, half a year
Because quarantine started in March
And here we are in October
That's such a long amount of time
Has Ben never won?
He organizes the thing?
He's never taken it home?
Well, yeah, he doesn't really play
No, he's not skeaky, skeaky is somebody named Blair
Who is very, very good
He's very good, I should say
Ben doesn't really play in between the Saturdays
I play a lot, so I've been getting better and better
Other people are just sort of casual about it
And I took it seriously
And I took the trophy
Seriously
Yeah, you and skeaky
Who made that trophy?
It's so small
Tyson, actually
For Tyson
Yeah, he sort of
He painted this Mario figurine gold
And then mounted it on this plaque
Yeah, it looks, it's cool
It looks a little bit like a wannabe golden mic
And for that, you're actually going to get
You're going to get the turdy
What?
I was just thinking, since this is kind of an exciting week for me
Trophy-wise, I could parlay that into it
You've got a trophy, you have the turdy
It's not a trophy you want necessarily
But you still have two trophies
You've got the shitty little Mario thing that Tyson did
And then you have the turdy that you just won
I want, yeah
I wonder if there was a golden mic in there for the last couple of weeks
Because I don't think you've mentioned anything yet
There was a few times where I made you laugh
And I was wondering if that was
With regards to having a golden mic
Good enough
Yeah, checking up on golden mics after the fact is kind of
Turdish behavior, unfortunately
So there was a chance that I had that
But I
You might have earned a golden mic
Because it was actually being printed
It was being poured
It was a solid gold mic
No, I can't
I can't
And when you
Rejected golden mic, you actually get showered with turdies
Unfortunately for you
I didn't reject it
You did because you reject it when you checked it
You
You reject it when you checked it
That's right
So I checked to see if I want it
And just by asking
I have retroactively
Because you care a little too much
It's unsettling
It's unbecoming
I didn't even bring it up
It's uncouth and it's untoured
It is
What do you mean untoured?
I believe untoured is like
It's like
Any discussion
Whatever
Whatever, you don't care
You don't care
I mean I care
If it means anything, but I'm fear like
I won't be able to, right?
Can I have it? Or do I not care?
Not this episode
There's always next
A bonus turdy for you
That's two this week
This is insane
I just checked the trophy
And you're the season 5 champion
How did that happen?
Some sort of magic trick
Your name is on this Mario Kart trophy now
Yeah, me and Tyson
Me and Skeeks got a
An Airbean Skeek
Alright, this is a bonus
Thursday episode
Recording on a Wednesday
On Wednesday?
Yeah
People have started to vote
Have you voted? Do they have that in New York?
Or is that just a Cali thing?
I think it's just a Cali thing
The earliest
I'm voting in person
The earliest I can vote in my district
Is October 24th
Interesting
I'm actually voting in Persian
Which is like
So outside of this Persian restaurant
There's a ballot drop off
Over time this week
I don't remember being able to vote this early
But I got my ballot yesterday
I think we just never ever cared
Before
I'm surprised we didn't care
Last election
I knew I was going to vote
I'll vote on the day
But now it's
Two things
One, it's the virus
There's an anxiety around
Leaving your house at all
You want to like have that
But then I think there's more than that
It's the deep, deep-seated hatred
For Trump
You've got
Agita, you won out
I got
A few ballots for myself
Just like fictional people
I said lived here
I have eight ballots here
A few for dead relatives
So I'm going to cast
That's what the Fox News
Is afraid of happening
So it's cool that it is
Well, Soros is paying me $80 per ballot
And then I can take
I've been about harvesting too
So like sort of stealing the ballot out of mailboxes
For my Republican neighbors
And then writing Trump on it
And sort of throwing it in a creek
So as to raise uncertainty in that regard
While still being able
To cast multiple ballots
For the Democratic candidate
In order to steal this election
This witch hoax
This viral hunt
Viral hunt
For my man
But yeah, in California
You can fill it out and drop it off
As early as today
This is October 7th
Before the election
I have the ballot, I have the sticker
Actually, this is a good segue
Into the fact that we're partnering
With headcount to help
Register and inform people
So they can exercise
Their right to vote
That's right, I usually hate exercising
But I'll make an exception
Nice
Absolutely
Okay, you're sick
Oh, my chest
I have like a
Yeah, I have a fragile
Sort of like a weakened sternum
Slash immune system
Anyway, how do people get information
On how to actually vote
Headcount.org
And yeah, it's information
On how to register if you still can
And how to vote if you already have registered
I guess there are different rules
And regulations for every state
So get informed, figure out how to vote
There's lots of stuff you can do on there
You can check out where your polling place is
You can quadruple confirm that you are registered
So you can actually vote
You can even volunteer at a polling place
So just go to headcount.org
And click around, have fun
There's also, tell you what
Dude, there's also a text code
You can text voterheadgum
To 40649
I've never done that before
But if you text voterheadgum
To 40649
They'll
Send you a text back with the website
Which is nice
Convenient I guess
You got a text and a website
URL, or you can just go to headcount.org
Slash headgum
Headcount.org Slash headgum
Literally no excuse
Not to be prepared, not to vote early
Not to have your plan in place
So you can vote
So check them out
It's interesting because I've joined Trump's army
Of poll watchers, so it's fun to like
See it from both sides
It's not really illegal
Because my job is to sort of intimidate
The average voter
You're suppressing
Not suppressing because I still want them to vote
It's just, I'm part of his army
And so he's
Asking us to stand by
And stand black
And guard and make sure
That nobody's stealing this
Witch hoax from him
You know he's down by 14
Points in Pennsylvania, that's impossible
That's, Joe
Opposes fracking
Oh man, oh man
I'm so fucking scared
We're trending good, but you know
They don't matter unless we fulfill their destiny
So make sure that
If you can answer a polling question
You should be able to vote, get out there
Get the fuck out there
Alright, I guess we should answer these
Questions in addition to telling people
To vote, so we're sort of saving democracy
And helping you guys kill some time
On this Thursday, Friday, Saturday
And or Sunday
We got a question about a grind guard
Finally something that I'm
Very experienced in
That I can answer
Wow, yes, you're time to shine
Congrats
A few months ago
My boyfriend got a night guard
Apparently he was given instructions by his dentist
That the way to store and take care of it
Is to wrap it in a damp paper towel
And put that in the night guard case
Until wearing it next
I can't even begin to imagine why this is a good idea
A wet paper towel surrounded
By bacteria
Or mouth bacteria filled night guard
In a dark case
It seems like the perfect recipe
For a bacterial breeding ground
And it kind of is, the thing smells dank
Perhaps making it worse
Is that he does not change the storage paper
Towel daily, he often uses
The same one for three days
At a time
Anyway
This has transformed into terrible morning breath
I know no one wants to hear that
They have bad breath, but at times
They coil in the morning
I've suggested that he purchases some kind of cleaning solution
But he was not into that idea
I know Amir famously wears a night guard
And I was wondering what the cleaning regimen is
Does it involve a damp paper towel?
Also, how can I suggest
He changes his cleaning routine
Without offending him
Yeah, I mean take
You don't have a grind guard, do you?
And I mean, after that question
I will never get one
I was thinking about doing the Invisalign though
Interesting, for your upper or lower
For my boether
You know, just get these teeth right
Right again, you know
Like, what's the point?
I'm not going to an office, I'm not really seeing
Anybody IRL, I could just
Chill all day with
With the Invisalign on, with the smile director
Whatever, what have you
And they'll have freaking
Bomb-ass teeth when this whole thing's over
Yeah, well your teeth are yellow
So like, that wouldn't really like
Solve that issue
Like, you're not
It's not the alignment, it's the fact that you're
Rarely, if ever, brushing
Or cleaning them
Well, I can't floss because they're too crooked
No
If I got them straight, then the floss goes
Right in, you see
Oh, you're bleeding a lot
I lost one
There it goes
What the freak
That was a canine, fuck my ass
That was a canker sore
Yeah, huge fan of the grind guard
I didn't realize how much I was grinding until I got
A grind guard, and now when I sleep
With my grind guard in, it feels great
I feel like Steph Curry at the free throw line
Very well prepared to grind all night
In fear and not having it
Wear away the enamel
They tell you, or at least they've told me
To clean it just by brushing it
When you're brushing your teeth
And then once every like month
You get this like
Almost like an Alka Seltzer thing
That you drop into water that's like
Supposed to clean dentures
And you just leave it in there for hours
And I did that for a while
And then I stopped doing the denture cleaning thing
And I'd just been brushing it with a brush
But I also keep it outside of the case
Upside down so that like
It dries off completely
This wet paper towel method
Kind of concerns me a little bit
Especially if you're using it
I would think you want to wash it and dry it
For starters
He's not following the instructions
So we can't even like say
They don't sound normal
But like if you're not even following it
If you're not changing the paper towel
Every single day
Then you're just doing your own thing
And that's not good
That's not where you want to be at all
Yeah, and then
It might be too late
But I would suggest the denture cleaning thing
Which you could probably get on anywhere
Very quickly
Right, and I think if you are
Dating someone to the extent
That they're comfortable sleeping next to you
In a grind guard
Then you should also be comfortable enough
To have a conversation about
Like their dank ass breath
And be like
This will not do
Something's got to give here
I don't think that you'd have to shy away
From this conversation
Yeah, it's egregious, it's foul
Something must be said
Something must be done, there has to be an intervention here
Yeah, the smell
If you can smell it from his mouth
Into your nose in the morning
Then something is awry
Wild that he would open that case
Smell awful and he's like
Open wide
Time to chew on this till the morning comes
Yeah, do you sleep with your mouth open?
Um
No, I don't think so
I sleep
Yeah, I just don't even worry about it
I sleep in a weird way
So, what do you mean a weird way?
I sleep in an odd position
That doesn't quite make sense to some
But I don't have to worry
About my mouth being open
Or not
You don't have to worry about it
I know you have to worry about it
If you sleep with your mouth open
Now I'm curious about the position
That you sleep in
I twist myself on a pretzel
And I put my foot in my mouth
And I chew on my big toe at night
As I sleep
My foot's over my head
And I'm not in the bed
I'm underneath the bed
Twisted into
A weird little contortionist
Yeah
I sleep on a dog bed
With my foot in my mouth
That's bizarre
That's really, that's frankly
Disturbing behavior
I don't think I do sleep with my mouth open
I don't know what I do really though
Yeah, maybe a little
I'm definitely mouth open
Because I feel like my nose doesn't allow
I want to look at once this whole
Pandemic thing is over
I want someone to look at my nose and be like
Your passages are like 5% open
Or like, yeah, it looks fine to me
But I don't know if it feels like I can't breathe through my nose
As well as somebody else
So I'm like a mouth breather
But I don't know if I'm overreacting
Or if like a doctor would be like
Wow, I can't believe you've lived this long
Watch this and then he does something
And then I'm like, oh my god
I can't breathe again
And your voice is like this
Like a deviated septum surgery
Or something without the nose job part
Interesting
Yeah, I mean you definitely
I'm a mouth breather
You're a snore
I'm not a heavy mouth breather
I'm a mouth breather
I'm a mouth breather
I don't sound like that
Yeah, you do, you sound like a fucking sick pug
That's what you sound like
Sometimes when I'm sleeping and I'm like stuffed up
I sound like a little snore
On your computer you'll see you're snorting like a hog
It's disgusting
It's despicable
Really
This is my wake apnea
I have a pee-pap machine
So I'll sort of plug in this
Oxygen tank
So it opens my nasal passages
While I type
A giant iron lung
Nothing's also straightening your teeth
Oh yeah, two for one
Alright, let's take a break
Thanks sponsors
And we'll be back with this bonus Thursday episode
After these messages
Yes!
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Yeah, frame
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This was actually a really sweet moment
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I was just being goofy
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This is how I told my grandma she was pregnant
Yeah, kind of like
She misheard it or something like that
Or the way you said it was kind of like
Could go either way
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And we're back, Jake, do you have any
Oh, it's a lift to the fight
Mom, I'm coming
Gross
Yeah, yeah
Go to headcount.org
Slash headgong
Learn how to vote
Actually vote celebrate
When we
Come together
And tell this fascist dude
In the White House
He's got, he's fired
I want to be the one
That looks Trump in the eye and say
The results from Florida are in
You fired
Right, you'd be like
Well, you actually won Florida
But you lost Pennsylvania
The results from Florida
You did win that
I just don't see a path to victory
And you fired
That's what you want to say
That's what you want to say
And I want to look at Joe Biden
And be like, you're hired
Let's get
How are you going to sleep the night before
When you wake up knowing there's like 12 hours to go
Until like the results are being announced
We're just fucking watching
Waiting with the nervousness of like
It's like finishing a marathon
And you can't wait to find out where they tell you to
You have to run another one
What enormous
It's either over, he's done
Or there's four more years
What an insane amount of time
That he would still have left
Think about, yeah, think about how long
We've had
Him around already
I think it's been 40 years
That's unfair
Yeah, I don't know
That means this would not even be the halfway point
Terrible
That's the other thing I'm afraid of though too
Like if Biden wins
And then just that like
Two month period before
Inauguration
Yeah, but that's
The least of my concerns
Let him have at it and then hopefully we can reverse
Whatever damage he's somehow able to do
If he's still alive
Yeah
Oh man, just get out and vote
Just vote, just vote
Fuck, okay
Everybody get down to the ballots tonight
Stay there
I've seen some long lines to vote
And they look like
It's good to be able to
Like just drop my ballot off
But I miss like the communal atmosphere
Of a long line
Like everyone's sort of against this guy
It's kind of like a fun party atmosphere
Yeah, that's nice
I like that
But I won't experience that in LA unfortunately
Right
Because I've joined Trump's army
That's the only thing I'm going to enjoy
That I'm going to write it down
Report it
You're illegal
There was a dance party
Against the Donald today
Dearest Mike
Act
Of cowardice
Did you hear that he wants to still debate in a week
Even if he has coronavirus
Well I'm sure he would love to infect Joe Biden
With coronavirus
He obviously doesn't care about anyone else
When he's like
And
Maybe I'm immune
Yeah, maybe you're immune
I guess maybe you're immune
What a weird thing to suggest
Four days after you were in a hospital
God damn
The most insane thing that he did to me
Is like go up stand on the stairs
And like triumphantly take his mask off
When like everyone
It's not like a grand reveal
Of like I'm cured now
Or takes off his face wrap
To like reveal his new self
Yeah, what the fuck are you doing
You're so sick
You just
You should have left it on
Like there's no reason to be like
Triumph and reveal
Yeah, let's actually put it back on
I guess what you can
What I can say is that don't be afraid
Of coronavirus
Sorry, you took a fucking helicopter
To a private hospital
Three days ago, what do you mean
Don't be afraid of coronavirus
You've got like
The most powerful drugs
Surrounded by the most professional doctors
Like there's actually nothing to fear
As long as everyone else is the president
You're gonna be fine
Like 1,100 people died that day
Don't be afraid, get out there
Don't let it dominate your life
Yeah
What a moron
The worst person
The most powerful position
Anyway, let me know
Who I should vote for, still undecided
I am still TBD
Ken Bone Style
Alright, next question
Yeah
Hey, Jake and Amir
We'll call this guy Joseph R
Biden Jr
Nice
Got a problem for ya
I'm a guy whose hair is on his way out
Let's just say it's a tad too late for keeps
I still have enough hair that a person who's
Shorter than me might not notice
But most people can surely tell
It's a source of insecurity for me
A lot like the folks who deal with this
Luckily, there's an easy solution to this
Right? Just shave my head
But there's a problem
I have a mole in the center of my forehead
Right at the hairline
So I know if I shave my head
Every time someone looks at me
That's all they're gonna see
I don't love the idea of having a bullseye
But I'm not a huge fan of getting cosmetic
Dermatological surgery
Just so I can freaking get a buzz cut
So what can I do
To deal with my changing hair situation
Without having everyone's eyes
Trained on the little burrowing mammal
AKA mole on my face
Keeping you
Love
Joe Biden
Actually, a guy that lost his hair pretty early
So, interesting
And is also clearly insecure about it
So kind of like
Comb something
Yeah
Okay, so
I think
The decision is clear
You're gonna shave it
And then the next decision is
Do you live with the mole
Or do you remove it
It seems like
The smaller hump to get over
Is whatever your hang up is
About the cosmetic dermatological surgery
Pretty insignificant
And perfectly fine
It can almost be a health
Related surgery
Don't people get moles removed all the time
Out of safety?
I have got a mole removed
A couple weeks ago
Really where?
It was like right around my sideburn
Just above where my sideburn is
On my
Temple
And Jill noticed it
And I was like
I don't know if that's been there my whole entire life
Or if it's new
And then I went and the doctor was like
Tell your wife she's really great for noticing this
She was like very impressed
Wow
But he was like, it's nothing
And then he was like
It looks a little irritated
It might be because you're wearing a face mask
I'm gonna remove it
And then he just gave me a tiny little shot
Scraped it off with a little fucking razor
I'm gonna remove it
And they tested it
It's been on everybody, thank you
And yeah, it's super easy
So I think that that's probably the move
Because I don't
You're understandably insecure
About losing your hair and the moles
So I'm not gonna tell you to be like
Hey, get over it
It's a mole, no big deal
If you don't like it, don't worry about it
You can get it removed, it's pretty easy
The moles are not that big of a deal either
Unless it's like the size of a quarter
And Harry, I don't know if people are gonna be
Staring at it like he thinks
Yeah, I guess if it like
Gives you peace of mind
Do you
That's fine
Or like
Nobody's gonna notice it as much as you
But it's all about like how you perceive
Yourself with it
What if you got your mole removed
And then
Somebody came in and was like
Hi, I'm the doctor
What are you doing here, Harold?
And then you're like, excuse me
And he's like, sorry
This patient of mine
He seems to think that anybody could be a dermatologist
And he's been sneaking in and out
Sort of did he ask to have a mole removed
Yes, he cut me
He cut me, this guy cut me
He actually did a pretty good job
Alright, Harold, just off you go
I hate that he's right about how easy
My job is
And then Harold comes back
And he's like, what are you doing here, Henry?
You were in the room
He told me to leave
Why didn't you mention anything earlier?
This is a fucking
Improv scene
I'm just here to get my mole checked out
Was it a dermatologist that did it to you?
Yeah, I went to the dermatologist
For the full body scan
Oh well
Yeah
How do those work? Because everybody
I have moles on my back
Or random ones on my leg
How do they decide?
I think they say it's the new ones
It's the ones that aren't uniform
In their shape
The ones that are raised and the ones that are
Weird colors or something like that
So I have moles
But they've been there my whole entire life
So they're fine
Interesting
A new mole, or what could be a new mole
In my temple, that was something
They wanted to check out
And then did he have to shave your hair
Or ask you as cutting it
Hair came out
He pulled my hair back
He'd really maybe
Shaved a couple of hairs
But there wasn't a lot of them at all
Yeah
And then did he show you the mole
He's like, I can put this in a little
Commemorative case almost
He's got to mail it out to get tested
After that, he doesn't have to mail a whole mole
You can ask for half the mole
In like a little glass cube
You clearly want it, and I'm not going to get it for you
So you could put it next to your
Mario Kart trophy
Yeah, what do they do with the moles that are like
We tested this mole and now this mole is fine
They discard the mole
Or maybe they go
Back to that doctor's like personal
Portmolio
It's a pun on the word portfolio
So
Did my mic cut off?
No
I heard everything really loud and clear
And then in terms of trophies
For today
I think I get the golden mic
For Portmolio
What?
You think that's the one
That snitched it for you
Yeah, this guy has this
Manila folder filled with moles
Portmolio of sorts
Yeah, it's more of like a
Like a black
Like a molodex
Nice
Nice
A molodex
Let me see here
Yeah, it's Jake, right?
That's almost as good
It's almost golden mic worthy
I love it, but
Portmolio takes the cake
And actually
Portmolio gave the assist
To molodex
Which is another reason why I would
I would get that double golden mic
For the direct assist
To molodex
So this is a two golden mic episode
What about uh
I am cornmolio
That's a turdy
That's a turdy
I was gonna say I need teepee for my
Yeah
That's not bad
So yeah, it's like a little
On his anus to have a
No
An asymmetrical little raised
Raisin
Okay
You got the turdy
Actually, cornmolio
That uh
That bungmol was pretty
Pretty alarming
Um
Cornmolio, I think we're gonna have to
Do a full body scan
Oh no
Yeah, yeah, oh no
It's not looking good for you
Cornmolio
Do you have a living will cornmolio?
Cornmolio
Cornmolio, that's right
Yes, I'm leaving it all
To my nephew
Hey
Butt head
So if you're a little too young
To understand what's going on
Basically, there were these two characters
In the early uh
Sorry, the mid to late 90s called
Beavis and Butt Head
And there are these two sort of near-duels
That kept getting into trouble
And they would watch music videos for a living
And then, yeah
Beavis, was it Beavis or Butt Head
That became Cornmolio
Beavis would do Cornmolio
Which is like this alter ego of his
Paper for his ass
And to ask for it
He would just sort of put his t-shirt
Over his head
I think that's everything
That's everything
I'm sure everybody loves it
So Beavis, unlike Butt Head
Was a little more
He would hit frogs
With a baseball bat
And that was like Beavis's thing
And Butt Head was a little more of the intellectual
Braces
But Butt Head was kind of like
The smarter of the two
And then Beavis would occasionally sort of murder
A frog for fun
But overall, they just liked watching
MTV
Music videos and stuff
So that was Beavis and Butt Head
So, yeah
Alright
That's it, that's our time
Bonus Thursday episode
In the canister as they say
Yeah, yes
We're still hanging out in the
Jake and Amir Patreon Discord
So if you're a patron at patreon.com
There's new videos every week
And then you can hop on the Head Gum Discord server
And there's a private chat room in there
Just for the patrons
Called J.A. Patreon Chat
So check that out
And if you are
Just in need of questions to answer
Or perhaps
You have a theme song
Like that anonymous man up top
Who did not have a shouty voice
Who did not have a whiny voice
You can email
All that stuff to if I were you
Show at gmail.com
Until then, vote early
Vote often
Vote for Joe
And this closing theme song
Let me see who wrote it
Oh, it's the guy Dyer Consequences
Seth Dyer who wrote another theme song
For us
It's a parody of Midsummer Madness
By Joji
Do you know Joji?
J-O-J-I
That's a cool name for you
Joji
Yeah
Actually, I could be Casey
You could be Mimi, Mimi and Joji
That's our new podcast
Nicknames
It's not to like immature or something
Mimi and Joji?
Hey, I'm Mimi
I'm Mimi
Mimi
Just M-I-M-I
And I'm Jacob B
A-K-A Joji
Or Jo-B-G
Yeah
My nickname would be the middle two letters of my name
A-M-I-R
So just the M-I-M-I
So you're kind of the A-K
The middle two letters
A-K-A-K
Mimi and A-K-A-K
Yeah
Anyway, this guy doesn't have much to plug
Except for his Instagram which is
Dyer.consequences
D-Y-E-R
Thank you to you guys for listening
And we'll be back on Monday
Bye everybody
Oh yeah, bye
What to do
If I were you
Hosted by these two Jews
If I were you
You
You
You
You
That was a hit gum original