If I Were You - 546: TV Dinner

Episode Date: June 27, 2022

In this episode we discuss luggage riding, songwriting, and baby naming. Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum original three two one I just lay down some vocals it'll be easy for him to like turn that into theme song go upgrade yourself have it to your own you can be up there leave me back here on the floor go upgrade yourself have it to your own you can be up there leave me back here on the floor go upgrade yourself have it to your own you can be up there leave me back here on the floor go upgrade yourself when did this happen you can be up there leave me back here on the floor go upgrade yourself

get on out of your seat and go give a mirror the dirty get on out of your seat and go give a mirror the dirty get on out of your seat and go give a mirror the dirty get on out of your seat and go give a mirror the dirty get on out of your seat and go give a mirror the dirty so upgrade yourself on the other side of heart on the other side of heart on the other side of heart the experience has all been done and I can't park my car

I don't know what to think or feel that was art it wasn't just a theme song it was an experiment it was eye-opening it was quite eye-opening it opened my third eye yeah I'm my third eye was blind and now it's completely open. It's interesting because I think you, though inspired the song, were the worst part of that song. Every time your voice came in, it was grating and bad, disjointed, didn't fit. And every time the other guy sang or did music, it sounded good. Yeah, I see that. So the song was good when he did his own thing. And then whenever he returned to the quote unquote inspiration, it kind of tanked. I was amused, but not amusing, if that makes sense. Yes. I was bemused. Yes. That was go

upgrade yourself, parentheses on the other side of hard. Did we sing go upgrade yourself around the same time? That same day. We must have. I've been DMing with that dude about my punk rock song. Getting closer. Yeah, I wrote it on my flight out here. The one about me being a senior and your boyfriend's a freshman in college. Well, not you, just but yeah. It's like a high school angsty love song. Yeah. Okay. I was writing it. Sorry, I had to get to the rest of this guy. I know, totally. Just because. Yeah. So that was a parody of Bo Burnham. I can. What's that? I can sing. I can sing some of what I worked on if you want. Matt Pope is the YouTube channel. So he does piano and synth of bids. So that's. Home room starts at 8 AM. Oh my God. I'm nervous because I

felt like you didn't really want to hear it. So I felt like I did a fucked up job because I didn't have your attention or support. The song starts with the home room starts at 8 AM. That's the pre-chorus. I just felt like that was kind of the more iconic line of the song. I want like when people hear like it's already like the most popular song in the world. Hi from the past. This is like when I first debuted the song. So this is like your fucking Beatles documentary moment. Exactly. Yeah. So what's that part? Home room starts at 8 AM. No, let's hear it because you obviously are still working on it. I'm still working on it. Home room starts at 8 AM. I smile because I'll see you then. What's so fucking funny, Casey? You're laughing. I'm sorry, but what about this song is

funny to anyone. It's actually about the most important emotion of all. Love and angst and a crush. It is funny to think that in high school you had crushes at like seven in the morning. You rarely have a pre-8 AM crush now a day. Yeah. When else would you see someone so early? It's fun to have a crush. Yeah. To know that you'll just be around the person you like. And that and getting married is like feeling that every day. Crush every day. When I go to bed, when I wake up, it's a constant state of butterflies. Are you getting married? Well, I'm not married, but like, you know, the fact that you find that person to have those feelings with 24 seven, even if we're just like eating dinner next to each other. The butterflies don't go away. Exactly. This part never dies. It burns bright.

Yeah, that's the best part about being married. Okay. This is If I Were You, the only advice pod on the web hosted by me. I noticed I'm looking at my computer a lot during these, which I can do during the video, like the non-video episodes, but now that I'm on camera, I'm hyper aware of it. Yeah. But I'm looking for reading the emails and then my eyes just stay transfixed on it. Right, because it's a screen and you're like a toddler. Exactly. Watching Monsters Inc. You just can't be watching a YouTube compilation of fire trucks. Whoa. I'll turn it down, but it's pretty bright. We are getting some classic emails nowadays. Yeah. This one's about an apartment that this person found, not on Craigslist,

but on Facebook Marketplace. Lots of shit is going down on Facebook Marketplace. I've made some purchases. I've sold some items. Facebook is sort of just devolving into a Craigslist of sorts. Craigslist used to be kind of charming in how low-brow it was, but it kind of sucks. Oh, interesting. Facebook Marketplace has, it's got the message system built right in. You have to go to email and then text, and then you're also, everyone has a profile, so you kind of feel like they're a regular person. Yeah, it's great. Sometimes people use Craigslist and they die. Yeah. You never hear about someone die. I'm sure that happens on Facebook Marketplace too, but I bought a surfboard there. I bought a bicycle there. I sold the New York standing

desks that we had in the old office. All on Facebook Marketplace. All on Facebook Marketplace. No issue. No problem. I sold the couch on there. It's great. Respect. I made over a million dollars selling just my old stuff on Facebook Marketplace. The desk that you sold from the old office, that's not your cash to have. What? Also, does Facebook take a cut, or are they just sort of making money from the Russians for undermining democracy? That's how they make their cash. I was paid over Venmo, and then afterwards, when I listed it as sold, it asks who I sold it to. So I'm sure they're selling that info to the Ruskies. So that's making the market their fucking electoral

persuasions towards the general public. Exactly. Oh, you bought a surfboard? How about you vote for this fucking alt-right QAnon conspiracy theories? How about you storm the Capitol on that board now? Exactly. So this person found an apartment off Facebook Marketplace with a super affordable rent in a fantastic area, only to discover that I live with a 12-year-old and a 21-year-old's body. Oh, all right. He doesn't clean up after himself. He keeps odd hours as a night guard, but doesn't try to keep quiet, which is perhaps the worst of but perhaps worst of all is his diet. Instead of drinking water, he only drinks soda and monster energies, which are often left out, and when he doesn't finish them. And from what I've gathered,

the only food he can make in our kitchen is frozen Salisbury steak TV dinners, which smell absolutely terrible. I'm serious. I count my blessings that we're in Denver, so I can cover up the smell with something, because whenever he makes one, I'm left unable to breathe in our shared space for hours. Wow. So the point where I'm calculating the cost of buying him a $10 pizza every week for the rest of our lease, just to get some other smell in there. Wow. I can feel the miasma in our apartment leaching into my body, slowly convincing my physical faculties to betray the sovereignty of my mind, and to tell you the truth at this point, I've stopped wanting sex from anyone who will still have me after I brought them home. So now this is my

undercutting reason for leaving my hometown. So this is undercutting my reason for leaving my whole town. I'm moving to a city in the first place, and I'm running out of money for weed. Please help. Okay. Those are unrelated problems, I think. Well, he's running out of cash, and he has to live with this sort of energy drinking Salisbury steak eating dude. Yeah. And the weed helps him deal with that. It helps, yeah. So you sort of just like forget all your troubles, forget all your cares. I mean, at 21, it's just, it's rare that you're going to have a good roommate, I think. Because most 21 year olds are not nice people. Yeah, keeping, or just, you know, they're living on their own for the first time. So they're still figuring it out. You don't

necessarily know how to cook. You don't necessarily know how to clean up after yourself. Yeah, you were like 14, seven years ago, and now you're feeding yourself. Yeah. And it's a lot more awkward to be like telling a new roommate that you just met on Facebook to like clean up after themselves, than it would be to like tell a friend. But it's a lesson that you're learning because you should expectation set before you sign on. I don't know if you did that, but when you message about the apartment, you say, are you clean? Do you cook? Do you eat TV dinners? Yeah, what's your diet? What's your job? If he said I'm a night guard, maybe you would have been like, oh, I don't know if I want somebody that works at night and sleeps all day. That'll be right. Oh, no, sorry. I'm a night guard.

Like the kind that prevents you from grinding. Yeah. So it's just the guy being like, oh, one second, like separates your teeth. I think you're a little fucked, to be honest. So he can't do anything about it. It doesn't seem like maybe you can make light suggestions. You know, maybe you could ask him to clean up after himself. It's kind of weird to be like, I need this guy to change his diet. He drinks Monster Energy drinks. I'm sorry, he does that. You don't go from that to a sigh bowls overnight. Yeah. So he's going to keep on doing that. Maybe you can get him to stop leaving them out. What did you eat as a 21 year old? When I was 21, where was I in my life? I was living in, I think I had just moved to New York

City. I was living by myself. I was in a studio apartment on the Upper East Side. Yeah. So dinner time comes around. Is it a TV dinner situation? I would, if I made dinner, I would make like Annie's macaroni and cheese. I did that many times a week. Was that enough for a meal? A bowl of Annie's macaroni and cheese? Yeah. Well, a box because that basically, it's two servings technically. It's supposed to be two and you just ate it all. Yeah. Annie's, there was a burrito place down the block. I think I did a lot of like pick up. On the way home. Food on the way home. Yeah. And it was definitely not healthy. Like a sandwich for dinner? Yeah. Sandwich for dinner, burrito for dinner, pasta.

Didn't you use people like crumble up potato chips and put it on stuff? Yeah. I used to do a bowl of, this was when I was much older actually. I, my palate was refined and I would do a bowl of Annie's with sour cream and onion pringles as a spoon. I see. So you would use that almost as a dip. Yeah, exactly. It was a pasta dip. Do you still eat Annie's macaroni and cheese? Yes. I still love it dearly. It's my favorite food. So, but you don't eat it as a dinner or you just like eat it as like a 4 p.m. on still hungry situation? I'll eat it as a Sunday night cheat meal once a month. Oh, wow. Where I'll just have like a box and that's still enough for you. Yeah. It's a lot of pasta. Yeah. It's a lot of pasta.

But usually I'm supplementing it like I'll have a box of Annie's and a hot dog. That's good. Yeah. Still the chips or no chips anymore. In an ideal world, I'm having Annie's chicken sandwich, chips, or french fries on a Sunday when I'm super hungover. That's, that'll cure me and make me ill on Monday. And then the hot dog, you boiling it or? In the summer, if I'm doing, if I've got the hangover, I'll do the Annie's. I'll do the hot dog on the grill and I'll do a big old tube of pringles. I see the tubes on the side. Do you cut up the hot dog and put it in the bowl of mac and cheese? No, but I have done the, the Annie's with grilled chicken cut up, put in there with like a side of cool ranch Doritos

as a garnish. Using it as a spoon or just sort of? At that stage, no. I'm just kind of shoveling them into my mouth between bites. So my mouth is constantly full of something. Whether it be cheese or the cool ranch cheese or soda. Got it. Yeah. Oh yeah. Are you drinking a Coca-Cola classic with that? Yeah, ideally, a Coca-Cola classic. Going full, whole hog. Yeah. Afterwards, are you feeling greater? Like, do you kind of have heartburn now? Afterwards, I feel great. Yeah, I feel good about myself. I feel happy. I feel like I, I indulged and I did something for my soul. And then I have dessert, which is usually a banana covered with peanut butter and chocolate chips. And that also just takes you home. You sleeping great. Yeah, sleep great. The thing that hurts it

is that I always try to work out on Monday morning. And you feel heavy. Yeah, it's hard to, it's hard to get up and do that. What's your, what's your Sunday meal? Sometimes I'll have like a Caesar salad. Do you ever have a cheat meal? Do you ever have a cheat meal? I'm serious. Yes, I do. Sometimes I'll order like a cheeseburger from a, like a smash burger type place and French fries. Cheeseburger fries, milkshake. What are you drinking? I don't like milkshakes with salty food. It's too different for me. Yeah. Yeah, I need like, yeah, I need almost like bubbly water to help like, let everything go down. I can't go straight into like milk with the ice cream. And do you feel ill when you eat that much or do you feel good for you? I feel good

while it's happening. And then when I'm done, I don't feel great. I feel like it's like not going all the way down. How often are you doing that? Maybe twice a month. Twice a month. Because I try not to do it too much. Yeah. Is that on a weekend? No, it's just whenever it's like, oh, thank God. Ooh, we're out of groceries. Should we go shopping or should we order two cheeseburgers from a taco place? Does Abital like to do that? Sometimes she'll get a cheeseburger, but she's usually a little healthier. They mean, she actually likes salads. So like, that could be her cheat meal. Yeah, that's really cool. But this guy is sort of stuck with a TV, dinner, eating roommate who's drinks energy drinks. Yeah. And I think, I think I would just talk it

up to, this will be a rough year. You're 21. I had a bad roommate when I was 20, not 21 when I was... Oh, that's when we lived together. No, you were a good roommate. We were older and we had, we communicated, you know? It's like, needed you to put your dishes away and we would talk about that. Yeah, you did have a lot of demands for me about the dishes. Well, you need to put the dishes away because they stay in the sink and what happens? You get fruit flies. You put a loose banana in the fridge and are you going to put that in a smoothie? No, because the peel is frozen onto the banana. So you can't exactly do that. Then you just have the food with the freezer. But yeah, no, you figured it out eventually. I didn't figure it out. You just sort of kept yelling at me and

we mutually agreed to part ways sort of in a way. Yeah, but it was the, looking back on it, that was the best year of my life. Why? You're sort of angry at me the whole time. Yeah, I think I actually liked my roommate when I was 20. College, I had a rough year because my roommate was messier than I was, but I was also kind of messy too. I don't know. I think everybody's messy between the ages of 18 and 24 and maybe even beyond. Yeah, and I think a lot of time when you are 18 to 24 and you think your roommate is messy, your roommate might also have issues with you. Yeah, and it becomes a personal thing and then the smell becomes even worse and it's just, I guess my out-of-the-box suggestion is to get COVID because then you don't have a sense of smell

for a little bit, but even that's like, maybe not entirely worth it because you don't really feel well. I would start looking for a new roommate. Start looking for a new roommate. Yeah, you can start fantasizing. Yeah. Like, oh, this is cool. Let me get on Facebook Marketplace, see what else that is. And if you really find something good, you can, it sounds like, I don't know, do you have, they have like a true lease or did he like move in with somebody? Like maybe you could just, He joined. Yeah, but maybe, I would say year tops. Year tops, but also I think if you give them like a month or two and you say that you're leaving and give that apartment a deep clean and invite someone over and then be like, this guy's so neat. He's so organized. It's almost, it's like

a military. Yeah. Yeah. Also baked cookies. That usually masks the smell. There you go. Okay, let's take a break. Come back, answer some more questions. I should say that we're, this is a episode where we're both in the studio, so you can watch this on YouTube as well. So if you're listening right now, you're at your computer, you can check out the next two thirds of this episode on our YouTube channel. Indeed. So we'll be back shortly. Thank you to Helix Sleep for sponsoring this episode of our show. Hell yes. Thank you for making the sleep test, the sleep exam and letting me ace it and become the doctor of the mattress. Yes, sir. Yeah. So Helix makes a really great mattress line and you take a little sleep quiz to see what mattress is right for you.

Yeah, right. Jake's been bragging about completing this two minute, honestly, like Buzzfeed light quiz. I don't know how you sleep for the better part of a decade. I don't brag about completing it. I brag about acing it. Because you got the mattress and it was great or? Yeah, I got the perfect mattress. Thank God. Thank God I took that test. That's right. And if you want the perfect mattress, you can go to helixsleep.com slash if I were you for 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows. Amazing. Free pillows. Come on. Yes. This is their best offer yet and no, it won't last long with Helix. The better sleep starts now. So regardless of how you sleep, whether you like it soft, medium or firm, Helix is 20 unique mattresses just ready

to go based on how you fill up that sleep preference and they'll send you the best one. And if you go to helixsleep.com slash if I were you, that's 20% off. Amazing. Thank you, Helix. Sleep well. Thank you to stamps.com for sponsoring this episode of our show. Visiting the post office and dealing with shipping and handling is probably one of the most stressful parts of owning a business. But with stamps.com, all you need is a computer and a printer and they can bring the post office in your office. So if you need a package pickup, you can easily schedule it. If you need to sell products online, stamps.com seamlessly connects with every major marketplace and shopping cart. Running a business isn't cheap. So stamps.com has huge carrier discounts. We're talking up

to 84% off USPS and UPS rates. Holy smokes. And for 25 years stamps.com has been indispensable for over one million businesses. So if one million businesses can trust stamps.com, certainly you can too. Set your business up for success with stamps.com today. Just sign up with promo code if I were you for a special offer that includes a four week trial plus free postage and a free digital scale. Wow. No long-term commitments or contracts. Just go to stamps.com. You click the microphone at the top of the page and enter code if I were you. And that gets you a free four week trial free postage and a digital scale. That sounds pretty good. Thank you stamps.com for sponsoring this show. And we're back. Jake, do you have any?

Yes. Yes. I just experienced a really night. Well, actually it would have been a worse situation that was made all right by the fact that I have made a certain purchase. Okay. Okay. I have the spinner luggage. That's the four wheel luggage, the rolling carry-on. Yeah, you can like go this way, that way, because the wheels are complete spheres. Yes, exactly. Right. So it's a very smooth, it's a very smooth roll down the airport. I used to have the draggy one. Okay. With only the two wheels. Yeah. But I have the four wheel now. It's a very nice suitcase. Now, I also, because I have the suitcase and a backpack, I'm walking a long way to the gate. Yeah. But I recently bought a backpack with a luggage strap that goes slides down the roller. So the backpack sits on top of the

spinner. Okay. Okay. So like where the handles are before the luggage begins, there's a backpack. Yeah, basically there's like on the back, like so you have the actual pack and then you have directly on the back, it's like a strip of fabric that you slide down the handle that rests on the top of the luggage. I see. So you can sort of jerry-rig one just cumbersome wise. Yeah. By putting a backpack on the handles, but this one is like built to be placed on top of a spinner. Yeah, exactly. This is, it's got a secure fit. It doesn't fall over. It doesn't slip off. And why do you prefer it to wearing a backpack? Because you are light, you're nimble, you're agile, you can move freely through the airport, unencumbered. And when I flew out yesterday,

I was very late for my flight, as I mentioned, maybe not, but I was very late for my flight. Okay. And I had to do not just like a casual trot, like a jog, I had to do a pretty near sprint all the way down the terminal. Oh. And the backpack, that would have been slapping my back the entire way. That would have been like, but instead. Sweaty back. Yeah. I had the bag on the back, on the on the roller, just pushing it alongside of me and just running. It was like I was on a casual trot. What's that? Bag behind you to the side or in front of you. A little in front. A little in front. Off to the right. Off to the right. Exactly. Yeah. I have a video, do you want to see it? How did you stop to take a video? I did. I was basically hands-free. I just had to

wheel the. So you took a video while it was happening? While I was running, because I was like, this is so easy. Okay. Is this for your new TikTok, by the way? No. I did make a, I took a video of when I went surfing the other day, but I didn't have the courage to post it. Why? Seems like the first one was pretty innocuous too. Well, I'll explain why. Okay. All right. Here's this. Here's my video. Do you want to show it to them? Or I guess Grimm can get it and edit it in. Right. Exactly. Okay. Tips over. A thumb. So the thumbs up was almost to like, I'm doing great. Yeah. It's like, this is really easy. Yeah. Cause I wasn't running with my, I was basically running and my luggage

was just like floating alongside me. Yeah. I wonder if it can just like almost follow you. I took my hand off for the thumbs up. Yeah. But I wonder if there's like this new system where it's like this bag is just remote control. Have you ever seen the people that ride their luggage? Oh yeah. I've seen some fucking luggage where you sit on it. Yeah. And it's like a little scooter. Yeah. That's freaking weird. And I took a video of me surfing, but I didn't feel like it was, it was kind of like a, it's a video of me loading the board onto the car. A video of me putting the wetsuit on. Yeah. And then you're in the water. So I didn't really get any like surfing videos. Right. And then the second video was like me coming out of the water and tallying off my head.

And then the last video, I took the video of everything. Yeah. I put the, I put like the camera on my shoe to make a TikTok with it. Yeah. And then I went home and I hosed off the wetsuit and board and I made a video of that. So it's kind of like a complete journey. Yeah. But it was weird because it was like changing into the wetsuit to tallying off the hair. Yeah. It's like, it needed a surfing thing in the middle. I should have like filmed someone else. That's right. Yeah. But you didn't get the waves, like a wave of crashing or something. So it didn't feel complete. So I didn't post it. Right. But maybe you have 80% of it next time you just take the surfing video and slide it right in. Yeah. Definitely. Yeah. I'll make another TikTok for sure. Are you getting any,

I guess, have we posted the episode where you talk about your TikTok? I know. I don't think so. I think I'm still hovering around a lot. Okay. But once that episode hits, I mean the sky's the limit. Yeah. And that's Jake Hurwitz, okay. Jake Hurwitz, okay. I was trying to change it. But yeah, I think now I have to at this stage stick with Jake Hurwitz, okay. Yeah. Okay. Just like instead of like great or like, my name is Jake Hurwitz, okay. Yeah. There was, Jake Hurwitz was taken. So I just had to add okay. I just didn't really think of anything else to do. Here's an email that's not really a question, but it was kind of fun to read. It's almost like a fan mail about this one specific journey. Her name is Sarah. This is an embarrassing so we can call her

Sarah. Okay. I'm a quote long time listener who has recently started listening to your podcast again. When you first launched the show, I was an avid weekly listener every Monday and even more excited when you publish some on Thursdays. Then life got busy and I trailed off maybe around episode 120. That was a sophomore in high school when I listened to your show. And now eight years later, you've become my go-to on long drives. So I personally appreciate you going over 30 minute episodes, Wink. I guess we used to just go 30 minutes. Wow. I was so amazed to see that you were over 500 episodes when I re-looked you guys up on Spotify. I'm currently on episode 21, The Wiener Game. And holy shit, I can't wait to see, to hear what you guys have gone through over

the years, especially with the craziness that was 2020. Right. So it's almost like this audio archive of society through our lens. The time capsule. Like the morning after Trump episode would be an interesting re-listen. Right. I'm not sure how often you read through fan mail, but I wanted to say that I'm proud of you guys for how far you've made it. Can you believe just on episode 2019, or sorry, 20 or 19, that you were in the rec room for the first time? Remember when we like, wow, rented a real studio? Yeah. Or not even rented, but like somebody brought a set. Yeah. To make it sound basically like what it sounds like now. Right. I'm curious how that quality has changed. Listening to as a 24 year old versus a 15 year old has only made your show

funnier and more entertaining. Wow. I love that. I love Sarah. Thank you. We should listen to old episodes. I wonder if I sound different, feel different, how different the vibes are. There are podcasts that I have subscribed to that like do an episode, you know, a new episode, and then they do like a rewind episode. A classic. Yeah. And they like do a new intro for it or something. Oh, interesting. So it would be kind of interesting for us to be like, okay, we're going to post episode 42. As a bonus Thursday. As a bonus Thursday. But in order to do that and make it a little more interesting, we listen to it and then talk about it before and maybe afterwards. I see. Like, can you believe I sounded like that, slash said that thing, slash thought that thing. Yeah.

That'd be fun. We should, at the very least, we could try that for an episode. Yeah, because I mean, we started in 2015? No, it was 2013. 2013, that's right. Which was like, who was the president then? That was Obama? Yeah. Still president. Yeah. So we went from Obama to Trump to Biden all in over the course of our podcast. Yeah. And we also started and I was like a single fuck boy and now I'm married. Remember the entire time I was dating Jill, we didn't talk about it on the podcast because it was like going to ruin my persona. Yes, your persona. Yeah. And now you're a TikToker. And TikToker wasn't even around when we started, I don't think. It may have been. It was musically. You were really popular on it. Yeah, it was big musically. So that was cool to

hear. I wonder how the rec room guys are doing. How's Adrian Grenier's studio? I think it was on Vanderbilt. Does that sound right? It was in Brooklyn. I don't remember specifically where it was. It wasn't like Clinton Hill. But yeah, because I think I ride my bike by it sometimes. Oh, really? Yeah. Adrian. Oh my God, Grenier. Dude. I was in rec room. You were never home while we were there. That was great. That was just in his house. Yes. So Adrian Grenier, the star of Entourage just had a huge house in Brooklyn and the bottom was a recording studio for music. Yeah. And his like recording manager, somebody had access to the studio. Yeah. Was like, oh, I'm a big fan of the podcast. If you ever just wanted to record here during the off hours, I'm like, yeah, let's do

it. Yeah. This is great. It was awesome. Otherwise, we're just holding really shitty microphones up to our mouths in an echoey room that sounded awful. Yeah, the teleport. Yeah. Because right around when we started the podcast, you and your girlfriend broke up and like all of your stuff got moved out. So it was very echoey. So your apartment was very empty and echoey. She said she quote, didn't want to be with a podcaster. And now it's like this huge awesome profession. I'm sure she would fucking come crawling back. Is it an awesome profession? To be to speak truth to power, I think. We're poet laureates, basically. I'm the Langston Hughes of iTunes. Play that theme song again. Oh, the mom I'm coming on. Upgrade yourself.

Me huddled over a fucking greasy laptop. Upgrade yourself. It's not even my song. Here's another quick update, an email that we got about Ivy League emails, which we brought up the other day, like how people used to have .edu emails. What happens when you leave college? This guy Logan writes, to answer your question about edu emails, it varies by school. Some schools like mine allow you to keep your email indefinitely. Some schools give you a special alumni email address like Yale. I bet I could get another Yale alumni email address. How do you really cool? My mom worked in the admissions office. So what would it be? We have powerful friends at that. Jake at alumni.yale.edu. Yeah. How dope is that? That's pretty fucking cool if that comes

from me. And faculty and staff also have edu emails, but it comes with nice perks like you still get some student discounts even though you're out of school and you can still sign up for classes online using .edu. I see. So you can, if you want to take, is that a perk? It's a perk if you want it to like, oh, a free college level course. Oh, I see. I don't know, I guess I kind of like education, but for you it's sort of like to be bad or something. I think, you don't like education at all. So you get the Yale alumni email address from your mom and I'll fucking audit an art history course. That's cool. And it will be a zoom. That's right. And I'll take the midterm and I'll get a

fucking GPA and I'll get a credit card slash report card from Yale. And a J. Crew discount. Because I'm a student. And actually, can I get a movie half off because I went to Yale once or at the very least my mom worked there. Go Bulldogs. So that's the update on the email address. Good. Thank you. Okay, let's take another break, answer some more questions on the other side of these messages. Yes. Thank you to Aura Frames for sponsoring this Head Gum podcast. You know, Aura Frames is sponsoring not just this episode, but the entire Head Gum network, Jake. Wow. That's correct. I mean, this might be the Goat Father's Day gift. I think it actually is. Yeah. Yeah, not just Father's Day, but if for any not so tech savvy family member that you need a gift

for soon, these digital photo frames might be the best of all time. Yeah. For me personally, these things are perfect. I'll tell you why. As you know, I am expecting my first child. We got one for Jill's parents. Oh, wow. We got one for Jill's grandma. Holy smokes. We got one for my parents. So there are three of these bad boys in our family right now, but they're great. Really easy way to like stay in touch with your family. You can upload as many photos as you want directly into my parents kitchen. It's really nice. Oh, that's cool. So you take a photo of anything, perhaps a baby, and then it goes to their digital photo frame. This is actually how we told Jill's grandma. She was pregnant. We got her the Aura frame. We plugged it in. Jill's grandma was pregnant.

Really nice, asshole. This was actually a really sweet moment for me and my wife. And you're trying to make a joke of it. I was just being goofy a little bit like, this is how I told my grandma she was pregnant. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of like she misheard it or something like that. Or the way you said it was kind of like, could go either way. By the way, Jill's grandma is pregnant. Oh my God. Jill's grandma is 90 and pregnant. It's pretty cool. And you told me with a digital photo frame? Holy smokes. And we let her know with an Aura. Yeah. Thank you. The Aura announcement. So you can instantly frame photos from any device, anywhere and invite the whole family in on the fun through the Aura app. Add me to your Aura app.

I'd love to upload just a picture of me like at a pool or something. That could be funny. Yeah. Like your banana or your dog alongside pictures of my daughter. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. You deserve that. You can even preload photos and add a personal video message that will display as soon as your dad or anybody connects to the frame. Yeah. It's a great gift. A really, really iconic gift. And right now you can save on the Perfect Father's Day gift and visit Aura Frames. That's A-U-R-A Frames.com. And our listeners can use code HEADGUM to get up to $30 off plus free shipping on the best selling frames. There it is. Oh wow. This is timely. The deal ends on June 18th. So don't wait. Terms and conditions apply. That's Aura Frames A-U-R-A Frames.com.

Okay. Go get your parents something. All right. And use the code HEADGUM for $30 off plus free shipping. Right on. Thank you Aura. And now back to the HEADGUM podcast you were listening to. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. Thank you, BetterHelp. If you're finding yourself in a difficult, anxious, stressful situation talking to a professional licensed therapist is the best way to navigate yourself out of that difficult place. And it's not necessarily easy to find a therapist, especially one in your area. But BetterHelp makes that all easy because it's online therapy designed to be convenient, flexible, and suitable to your schedule. You just fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist. And you can

switch therapists at any time for no additional charge. It's incredibly helpful. Therapy has helped millions of people over thousands of years. So give therapy a try. It can give you the tools to find a more balanced life. I've tried therapy. It's been very helpful. So you can find that balance better with BetterHelp. All you got to do is go to betterhelp.com slash if I were you. You do that today. You can get 10% off your first month. So the prices are already affordable because you're not paying rent for a building somewhere that you have to drive to and wait in a waiting room. This is done entirely online, but you're still getting professional licensed help. And it's extra affordable. That's betterhelp, h-e-l-p.com slash if I were you. Check them out.

Thanks, BetterHelp. And we are back. Oh, here's an interesting one about names. Oh, people sort of think that we're experts in naming stuff. We often talk about naming things. Your future child, Ragnar. Yeah, we nailed that name. Yeah. Jill's not on board, but that's fine. It's a small hurdle. She'll get there. I want to preface this with the fact that you've answered my wife's question on your show before about what we should do on our honeymoon in New York. Oh, nice. So I'd like to think that you're both important to be enough, important to be, uh, involved with another stage of our lives. Yeah. We've just started discussing children names throughout our 10-year relationship and have had some fun discussions about what they could be. Love it. For some reason, I landed on the

name Luther and thought it would be so badass and could be a really neat boy's name, but my wife disagrees. I think she thinks it's fine and she has no problems with it in theory, but she's afraid of potential nickname backlash. Feel free to say this on air, but their full name would be Luther Lu. So the first thing that comes to mind is Lulu. I think that's okay. I would hope we'd raise them in a way that they'd own it or not let them bother them. I think your guys' agreement would go a long way to convince my wife that Luther is an awesome, as awesome as I think it is. Jake, I figure you'd be on board because the name Ragnar is brilliant. And Amir, to get you on my side, I will say that I've actually pitched Amir for our child's name in the past because I think the

incongruity with how they will look will be kind of fun. FYI, my wife is a live white dime piece of a lady and I'm a short nickel of an Asian man. I hope you guys agree with me. If not, then I'll just say it's been an absolute pleasure being on one of your guys' podcast as a day one and I look forward to at least one more day. Future father to Luther Lu. Ivan Lu. Luther Ivan Lu. No, that's the guy's name is Ivan. Oh, I see. Okay, okay. First of all, I'm a big fan, as I've said many times, of the alliteration in the name. The Hank Hurwitz. The Hank Hurwitz is what I wanted to name my son and then my sister stole it away from me. Although you can have the same name as your cousin. Yeah, that's true, but it's kind of,

I mean, it's a little, it's a little strange. So you don't want to have that conversation with your sister. Yeah, yeah. I'm also having a Henry. I wouldn't want to take that from my nephew, you know. Another Henry. I love him. Okay, so Luther. What's his last name? Goldstein. Different. Different. Yeah. His name should be Gary. I don't mind. I don't mind Henry Goldstein for you either. HG is pretty cool. Headgump. There we go. Wow. I like the double L. Here's what I would say about Luther. To me, it conjures Lex Luthor, a villain. Yeah, yeah. There's, there's something, it is badass, but there's something a little bit dark about a Luther. It's like a Lucifer. Yes, exactly. That's why I think I don't like it, because it seems very like biblical in a Christian way. So

it doesn't spark joy to me. Yeah. I didn't know that was, I guess that's Luke and also the Lex Luthor. Oh, Lutheran. Yeah, that's another. I mean, I like Lucas Liu. That's pretty cool. Oh, that's cool. K-A-S or a C-A-S. I was picturing C-A-S, but I think either way works. Lucas Liu. I will also say that I like Lulu a lot. Like Lulu as a name? No, as a nickname. Yeah. Yeah. Like Lucas Liu called Lulu. That's fun. Yeah, I like that too. I like that too, Lou. What about middle name? Louis Liu. Yeah, and then he can go, he can work at Lulu Lemon. The triple L. Oh, well the middle initial should be O, because then it's L-O-L. And that'll sort of still be prevalent when he's 18. Yeah. You do it for the lulls. Everything I do, I do it for the lulls, and that's for your son.

That's really good. Yeah. Lucas Oliver Liu. Yeah. Lucas Liu, I think we nailed it. Okay, so I guess Luther was an awesome start, Ivan. Yeah. And we appreciate it, and I'ma let you finish. Yeah. But ultimately at the end of the day, it's gonna be a Lucas for us dog. You could also go Lennox Liu. And then you, the nickname is Lilu. Lilu? Yeah. Because L-E, L-U. What's Lilu? I don't know, it's just another fun way, Lulu, Lulu, Lilu. Yeah. Or it can also be like, like completely off the beaten path, Dennis. It's a mix of Dennis and Dan. I was gonna say Lenny or Leonard. I was gonna say Dennis. Yeah, no, you did say Dennis. Wasn't that the

For Mean Streeters podcast, Dennis and Dennis? Was it? Yeah. Do you guys ever release that? I forget. I think we released it in, that was like before we had a podcast. Yeah, it was like in 2010, we did a fake podcast called Everything Nothing. Yeah. And you guys just waxed. Full episodes. Like an hour long, right? Yeah. Or you just like talked about nothing. If it's really good, it would like live in some sort of cool lore. It's like, did you hear like, they made a podcast in 2009? It's really funny. They never released it or something. Another funny podcast that you made was, that we never released, and I think we should make, is the one where you clone yourself. Yeah, that was much more recent. Yeah. That was so.

I have them. Everything nothing. Holy shit. Really? How long are they? It's a 2013. They're, oh my god, there's 15 of them. 15? Yeah. Holy shit. Play one. Just go to the middle really quick. I'm afraid. It's terrible slash illegal. All right, here's one call. There was like a storyline. It was basically like Mean Streeter were playing like radio lab style, like culturistas. But like at a certain point, I forget what the bit was, but like Streeter was either like marrying his cousin or like had to move in with me or something like that. This one's called, they're also 13 minutes each. Oh, 13. I thought they were so long. Welcome, welcome, welcome. Can you kadoosh to everything? All right, I'm already slowly ashamed,

but I'll listen to that little kadoosh. We made a new way to say hi. I love it. Will you send them to me? I want to listen to them on my car. I really thought we made like two or three, but yeah, there's 403, 404, 404. Oh, there's only some of them, but they go to 415. Wow. I should send this to Streeter and threaten to sue them. Yeah, everything nothing. Episode 123. Holy shisha Wow. All right, sweet. Thanks for that walk down memory lane. 10 minute webisodes of a podcast that existed in character before if I were you. Wow. We really should release those. Kadoosh. Kadoosh. It's all because you said Danis. Do you think that was wedged in your brain for a decade? It must have been. It had to have been. All right,

thank you to Ivan. Thank you to future Lucas, Lou. Thanks to you guys for watching. Thanks to you guys for listening. You can send us all that stuff between email questions, theme songs you have, everything to ifirishow at gmail.com. Yeah. We're also still making videos on our Patreon. We watch Jake and Amir episodes. Indeed. And now we're going to start listening to everything nothing. And that's at patreon.com. J.A. Let's end this with that classic hit that was a little hard to hear, but ultimately joyful to listen to. Go upgrade yourself by Matt Pope. Go upgrade yourself. See you soon. I just laid down some vocals. It'll be easy for him to like turn that into theme song. Go upgrade yourself. Have it to your own. You can be up there. Leave me back here

on the floor. Go upgrade yourself. Have it to your own. You can be up there. Leave me back here on the floor. Go upgrade yourself. Have it to your own. You can be up there. Leave me back here on the floor. Go upgrade yourself. Have it to your own. You can be up there. Leave me back here on the floor. Go upgrade yourself. Go upgrade yourself. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give

a near the dirty. Get on out of your seat and go give a near the dirty. Go upgrade yourself. Experience it's all been done and I can't park my car. That was a hit dumb original.