If I Were You - 558: Gamer Love

Episode Date: September 19, 2022

In this episode we discuss vacation romance, Twitch streamers, and National tragedies. Advertise on If I Were You via Gumball.fm.See omny.fm/listener for privacy information.

This is a headgum original. You gotta travel so far Because everything you want Is on the other side of art You gotta fight every battle You gotta travel so far Because everything you want Is on the other side of art

Because everything you want Is on the other side of art We love you! Lighter. Studio catches on fire. Oh my God! The frame TV was so flammable. How is that fair, Samsung? Back in the lab slash studio. That's right, IRL.

In the same room. Easier to edit without the zoom when you hang out in the same room. That was from Rex who has an NYU.edu email address. So you're either a student or recently removed. Yeah, or just can't let go. Can I talk about something the other side of hard? It's not fun to hear or say. I understand the spirit of the saying that you mentioned.

I think it's good for a coach in a speech. It doesn't translate to a song. Really at all. Why is that? The other side of hard is just like, it's grating to hear. I would want to hear that in a locker. When you want working out the other side of hard, it's motivating. Translated to lyrics to hear them sung.

Respect to all of the musicians who have tried. You can't make it work. I'm sorry, am I crazy? Casey, we're in the studio. Can you back me up on this? Yeah, I don't know how it could work. I think it's possible, but you gotta have some kind of magic. Is it because the way it sounds like side of hard?

The other side of hard. It's just not fun to say. I don't think hard is the right word to have in a song. Hard is a soft word. Soft is a hard word. Hard is a hard word. Yeah, hard is a soft word. H-H-A is like, it's not anything.

You have the hard part. That's a hard word. No, it's not. It's kind of a hard word. The R-D, that's hard. Yeah. R-D is good. Trad is a hard word.

Hard. Hard is soft. No, it's not a soft word. I think it's a soft word. It's not hard. You're saying it's soft. Hard. You're saying that's a hard word?

It is a hard word. Hard. Hard. Way in, way in below. Anyway, I haven't done a theme song before writes Rex, but everything you want is on the other side of hard was too good to pass it up.

It's a little trite to be fair. Because we definitely milked it more than that actual coach ever did. Yeah, totally. It's not his fault. Good thing to come up with on the fly. Bad thing to make your mantra forever.

So here's my attempt at fully realizing your McCartney-esque idea. McCartney, I don't think so. Not Paul. Jesse McCartney. Andrew McCartney, the actor. You can shout out my SoundCloud page, Local Radicals, that would be great too.

We have an album coming out soon. Local Radicals is a good name. Okay, so thanks Rex. Thanks to you guys for submitting. We still need more theme songs, so now's the time folks. And it doesn't have to be other side of hard related. Ideally, it's not. It could be anything. Yeah.

Like, whatever. Two dudes hanging out. It's fun to be there. Two dudes hanging out. It's fun to be there. What do you say? Yeah, or anything. Like, that's perfect. Just do that. That's better than other side of hard, I think. We have transition from

Two dudes hanging out. Yeah, yeah. We're two guys in the same room. Woo! Do you have a problem with me? I was saying that we transitioned away from TV jinglish at

intro songs to like full musical songs. Yeah. I think we can start drifting back at 15, 30 seconds. Yeah, I think that's cool. Yeah. TV musical. Have you been watching the new Game of Thrones show? I watched the first two episodes. I hear they just used the Game of Thrones

theme song. Yeah, the first episode, I don't think they did. The second episode, they did. That seems illegal. Why? It's the Game of Thrones. It's not, though. Yes, it is. Isn't it a prequel? Like, there's no the same characters. The game is the same.

Yeah, the game is the same. And it's the same houses. The same families. I just think that they're cheating by saying, oh, here's the same theme song. So, like, it almost tries to trick the audience into thinking this is just a new game. But I mean, then you could say that about literally every aspect of the show. Like, they're sitting

there in King's Landing. Is it called, like, Game of Thrones colon dragon suit? I think it's called House of the Dragon. House of the Dragon. So, Game of Thrones is not in it. Yeah, I don't think so. So, they can't use the theme song. What are you fucking... Don't hold my hand. Who the fuck do you think you are?

I feel like we're on the same page finally about that. Or not. Because I was like, I don't watch Game of Thrones and I heard Avi Tal watching and I was like, I'm like, oh, is this Game of Thrones? No, it's like the new Game of Thrones style show. They're doing that. Yeah, they're trying to

like, earn that, like, you know, they want to hit the fan in the heart. Like, oh, here's that show you love. Don't worry, it's the same. But it actually, you know, I feel like that theme song was also triggering because season 8 was so bad.

So now it almost makes it... They're erasing a mistake. It's like if Better Call Saul used the Breaking Bad theme song. Yeah. Which I think rightfully, if they wanted to, they could. It just doesn't feel right.

You don't even like the show. I don't need to like it to weigh in. As a critic and I had some notes on episode one. Like I didn't know any of the characters. Which is fine because they're new but at the same time I felt like I was being left out in the dust. Did you watch episode one?

No, did you? Did you like it? I didn't love episode one. I thought it was like it was a weak impression of Game of Thrones where they did a little bit of that gratuitous violence just to be like, hey, this is

that crazy show. Edgy. Yeah. But they didn't really set up enough... They didn't set up the characters enough to make me feel like anything for it. It just felt like kind of gross. But episode two it started too. Episode two was interesting. I heard episode three gets even better.

The Ring Show. I haven't watched that yet but I want to. Jill's making me watch other shit. Can we watch Lord of the Rings and she's like, no, we have to watch Pachinko. What's that? It's a tale of South Korea

and Japan in like the 1950s, 1980s and today or some version of that. Or maybe it's like the 1910s, the 1950s, 1980s. Yeah. And it's really beautiful. Way, way more like meaningful

and nuanced. But I'm just trying to watch a dragon go ham. Go ham. Smoke up a Targaryen ass. Don't blow smoke up my ass. And if she doesn't watch it, you can't watch it. Or do you guys ever go into different rooms

and watch different shows? She would do that. I'm too needy. I'm like, I want to just hang out together so like we'll watch whatever we can both agree on and then I come to L.A. and I binge. Yeah, I can sometimes and sometimes I have to record too late

but last night we got home early and I was able to watch an episode. And yeah, what about you? It sounds like you and I'll be taught don't watch the same thing. She'll watch Game of Thrones and you'll what are you doing? Yeah. Yeah, I'm usually jerking it or like I'm in the office like cranking it. Yeah, I'm like

or in the kitchen. Where do you fap while she's watching? I'm either in the office jerking it or like I'm in the kitchen having like a cheeky fap or like if I'm in the bathroom. Into the garbage disposal. I get turned on or whatever. She's watching it and I'm like sort of jerking off in the bathroom or the bedroom. You'll like put a flesh light

into the like your sliding glass door and between the sliding glass door and the wall. I'll fuck the front door or the nail slot so she's watching. And you'll pretend you're watching a loop but you're sort of pumping the flesh light. That's enough. Don't bring the dog into it. Oh god.

Oh god. Oh gosh, oh golly. No, we usually deviate because I'm watching sports. Where do you watch sports on your phone on your computer? Either like she's watching on her laptop. I'm watching on the TV or I'm watching on an iPad. She's watching on the TV. But you're hanging out in the same room.

Sometimes, sometimes we separate. Like if I need to listen to something. Yeah, you don't put headphones on and just hang out on the couch? Don't put headphones on, no. Alright. Speaking of shows, this is a podcast after all. People are in desperate need of our advice.

It's called If I Were You with Jake and Amir. Sometimes we record over Zoom remote. Sometimes we're in the same room. Sometimes we're wearing the same color shirt. Isn't that interesting? And red is kind of rare for us. I feel like we both only have one red shirt. This is my only red t-shirt.

Yeah, I think so too for me. Very cool. You know this is the t-shirt that I actually have two but the other one's too small. Anyway, this is the shirt that I wore in the last episode of Jake and Amir. Wow. There are pictures of you in that shirt but it's green, right? There might be. I know there's another thing where I have like a green

shirt and they made it red. So it might be that. Right. In like Photoshop afterwards, yeah. Yeah. Or it was like orange and they made it green or something like that. Oh yeah, the turn's open to sun is a green shirt and I think they made it orange. Yeah, it's a good shirt. It's a great shirt.

Okay, this is about a lady who fell in love on a vacation to LA. Okay. You're on somewhat a vacation in LA right now. Indeed. So we'll call this lady who's a famous Los Angelino.

Oh gosh, there's so many to name. Yeah, it's a city of stars. Yes, exactly. Toss any celebrity out. They probably live here. Yeah. She's thinking of a celebrity. Like the queen. No, she's, I mean, she's dead and in famous.

She's famous, yeah. She's a celebrity basically. Okay, fine. Do you want to use the queen? I feel a little wrong because it was her funeral the other day. Yeah. So why don't you just come up with any Actually, Megan Merkel's from LA. Perfect. She's in line to the throne.

I don't think she is. Okay, okay. Megan Merkel writes, she's from the valley. Why don't you read the question? All right. Don't make small talk with me. Oh, this is funny. I'm a 28-year-old female from Canada.

Oh, my God. She was just visiting LA. Well, that's fine. That's fine. That's fine. Yeah. Do you want to come up with a fucking famous Canadian? Well, the queen did kind of rule over Canada. Fine, perfect. We'll use the queen even though it's a little bit in poor taste. Yeah. And it's important.

Queen Elizabeth II. You hate it. How about we just call her Liz? Perfect. Liz writes, I'm a 28-year-old female from Canada. I actually met you guys at your live show in Calgary. Whoa. I recently went to LA on a girls' trip for Labor Day weekend.

We had nonstop things planned, hiking, surfing, shopping, Dodger game, etc. And honestly, I had no plans to party that hard, but lo and behold, we went out our first night there and I met a guy. Okay. I wonder where they went out. Button mash near Dodger Stadium.

Yeah. That's really cool. It's sort of like drinks and Asian fair pre-game. Yeah. You're sort of playing games, maybe one thing. Yeah. And is he playing games? That's good. Air hockey. You're both sort of dueling sombrero puck things situation.

And then like you do a slap shot and it fucking like jams your fancy. Jumps up, chips his tooth. You guys hook up on the way to the dentist. What? We immediately hit it off and had the exact same sense of humor and just laughed and chatted all night.

We ended up hanging out the next two evenings as well and we slept together both of those nights. Good shit. Wow. When I left on Monday morning we were texting but the messages got further and further apart. Eventually I accepted defeat. Gave his last text a thumbs up

and figured this was a fun weekend fling but that's all it will be. Alright. He ended up texting me yesterday after chatting a while. I mentioned that I'm planning to go to San Diego for Canadian Thanksgiving and that if he can swing it should meet me there. He said that he would like to see me and will look into it

but when I responded to keep me updated he didn't reply. Now I just don't know what the next play is. Is there a perfectly crafted text I can send that asks whether he wants to see each other again slash figure it out or should I let this go forever? I know it's naive to think

a long distance two nights stand could ever lead to anything more but I've never felt such a connection to someone before go of that excitement. I realize this would be a grand generalization but our most late 20's guys in LA still looking to live the single life and was I

just some no strings attached fun? Any advice or input you could have would be greatly appreciated. PS Fate on Shuffle has been on every single one of my summer playlists that shit slaps. Minidab. Minidab.

Good shit. Shuffle. Pop it on. Put it on that Spotify playlist. Okay. So she was visiting slept with a guy a two night stand. So it was more than just a one night stand.

Two night stand. That means more doesn't it? I think well here's the thing like was I just a no strings attached fling for the weekend? Yes. You were but he was too. I think that was kind of probably the vibe and maybe why it was

light and fun and easy or whatever but now you're asking how do I parlay that into a longer term thing? Yeah. I feel like trying to get the answer that you want is not going to get you the result that you want. You want...

Is it like self sabotage to be like we should meet up in San Diego that might scare him off? I think that's fine to be like we should meet up in San Diego but to get confirmation that like so do you want to meet up in San Diego? Yes I want to. That will make you feel it'll settle your anxiety right now about does you want to see me

but I don't think that following that road is actually going to result in him wanting to see you. Does that make sense? So like she's kind of anxious to be in this gray area of like do we have a plan or not? Yeah. Definitely. If she like tries to concretize the plan can you just tell me yes or no if we have a plan

then it'll be like well let's not because of that attitude. So I think while it's hard on the other side of hard you have a better chance by just being like sweet like you're going to let me know and like just if you feel like chatting talk about anything else

because you had a lot in common. You guys vibed so keep on doing that without worrying about like but will I see you again because you can't until you go to San Diego anyway so you just have to keep the vibe alive then go to San Diego then make it happen.

Yeah it's almost like a candle that can extinguish completely or go off. Exactly. We're piling the kindling on and the kindling is the flirting it's the fun chatting not the firming up of plans. The firming up of plans

is the structure it's a wet log. It'll smother the fire. It's a wet log. It's not kindling. It's a wet log. So let's keep on putting the kindling on there. It needs to be dry leaves. Like a text that's not about the plan. Exactly. That's a dry leaf. That's a twig.

Yes. A twig. Every time you look at a text you know try to decide if it's dry or wet. Is it small? Will it catch? Or is it a smothering? What do you think a twig could be an acronym for? Text without

Oh a text without a goal. That's twag. Yes. And you fumbled the ball without one. Without eagle. Eagle. That's

not a word. That's T-W-E-I. Text without eagle, eagle? Obviously not. Text without implied goals. That's good. You have to throw twigs on there. Implicit goal. Oh that's good. Okay.

Text without implicit goals. So it's not like hey are we gonna fucking do this or not? You have to act like hey I'm here, it's cool, whatever lets meet up or not. Act like you don't feel. Yeah. But at the same time you don't know what this other guy's thinking. It could have been just a fun. He could have heard

oh she's in Canada and that's exciting because then I won't have any local obligations to hang out more. But the further you go along this road of being like oh wow she's actually really fun to talk to you know maybe the text moved to a face time moves to like him

going from like oh this is fun because she's in Canada there's no pressure, no strings to oh wow this is fun but I wish you weren't in Canada, I wish you were here you know. Like it's just a slow burn to continue the twig metaphor. This was sent in September

just a couple days ago. So Canadian Thanksgiving I think is in October so maybe she can give us an update then. Perfect. And if you're listening to this Lynn oh let's not say her name you already did. Not that it matters if you're listening to this Liz.

Where did you go out to meet this guy? Would love to know West Side, East Side, was it indeed Button Mash? Yeah definitely want to know. Okay let's take a break, think some sponsors, come back and answer more questions after these. Thank you to Helix Sleep

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thank you Squarespace and we're back Jake do you have any oh let's do it oh I'm coming do this week it's called thrifting

so like showing the second hand second hand yeah not buying new clothes anymore is that a you're all in or like you like a mix of old and new I haven't bought anything I guess I like new

plain white t-shirts but yeah new socks new underwear of course but pants and shoes pants shirts not shoes no come on and not pants either no got no shirts well yeah well not really shirts

no yeah pants pants t-shirts regular shirts jackets I think they're I find that they're better quality better ingredients everything about thrifting them feels

better okay here's my two problems with thrifting okay one the clothes kind of smell funny right when you buy them but you wash them and then they smell just like normal clothes yeah yeah wash them on high heat with your with your laundry

and you're gonna be fine two they fit weird like they're not normal fitting it's like this is how people wore shirts in the early 70s and like yeah the sleeves are long or the thing is shorter it's not boxy or it is boxy like I can never figure out the style of it totally I mean you have to try on a lot of

mildly smelly clothes yeah but I think that when you find something that fits in the thrift store it's really satisfying you also can take it to a tailor I have a tailor in the city that I like tailor your t-shirts not t-shirts but a but a regular shirt t-shirt

I feel like most thrift store t-shirts are better than regular shirts because they've like been washed and dried they're not going to shrink in the wash they're not the colors aren't going to run but I don't like old shirts like half polyester like they're just like made out of weirder materials I can never quite get comfortable in an old shirt from the 70s or 80s old t-shirts to be

significantly more comfortable interesting and so do you go to a specific place or is it just like any thrift store in the city I mean any anyone that looks anyone that looks cool some I mean in my neighborhood I'll just be walking past when I'll pop in there are a

few near me that I like and what's been your best find so far there's a place called awoke vintage which isn't like it's not going to goodwill or something it's it's still a kind of difference there's a difference between like Salvation Army and thrift stores right like one is like

$2 a t-shirt and then the other one's like oh this is actually $180 right there's the curated shops where they've like they've gone to the goodwill's they've gone to the Salvation Armies and they've gotten like the clothes that are stylish now and you can buy the thrifted version of it you pay a you pay a premium for it but

it's slightly better than going to the store yeah but it's bad when you go to a place that's supposed to be curated and they clearly just like dove through a bin like Salvation Army and are charging three times as much yeah but anyway there's some that are really well curated

I think my best find though was an old pair of Levi's 505's oh that was jeans aged to perfection the kind of jeans that you have to wear for 10 years before they look like that and someone else did it for me yeah and you don't mind that the fact that somebody

probably died in those pants they don't think they died in the pants not really it's kind of in play how because somebody passes away wearing their jeans maybe they're wearing a hospital gown or more comfortable clothes because they die in bed it would

be a sudden death situation if it's a sudden death then it might be like bloody and they might be stained yeah or maybe like some guy was just walking down the street and had an aneurysm and crumpled to the ground and died or yes exactly and his loved ones were like let's donate

these jeans no it's like let's strip the body because now it's time for us to praise the body well actually if that happens if he dies in those pants they probably cut them off they probably cut them off yeah how do they fit if it's like sliced down the side like that they don't

that's why I never like can get fully comfortable in that no one died in these pants they're just jeans okay and I did buy a hospital gown but that's different because it opens in the front which I thought was interesting and someone was operated on

in it but they survived barely yeah alright have you bought winter clothes jackets not this season I bought a fall jacket last year but I'm going all in on it and I think it's nice to not support fast fashion

I'm trying not to I'm trying to do that less because I was getting too many clothes just like delivered to my front door it's like you order two sizes you send one back and at the very least I want to start shopping in person and beyond that I want to start secondhand shopping better for the

environment better for my body have you gotten rid of clothes yeah I get rid of clothes all the time I make a big pile and I let Micah go through it and then I take what he doesn't want and I give it to my dad my dad doesn't want it then it goes to good will and then you still have shirts from like 15 years ago as well

yeah I hang on to my like this shirt that I'm wearing is from I think I bought this when I was 20 wow I'll buy it off of you how much 4 bucks okay sure let's switch right now? yeah

go ahead giant tattoos I fucking knew it alright maybe I'll because I haven't done it since like my early 20s the thrift style yeah I feel like there was a time we was like oh we're gonna go look for like cool t-shirts at Salvation

Army yeah and it's now it's more like there's a nice the bearded beagle it's just up the street we'll go off to work you wanna hang out with me? I'm gonna hang out during work but I really don't want to do after work shit with you anymore okay that's

ah shit I'm a fucking migraine damn you why did you fucking talk about that shit can you read this I have a fucking what's it called migraine not but like

when the colors are like starting to swirl why don't we take a break because you said something that was pretty hurtful to me and you also appear to be unwell we can foul her through why don't we take five we haven't even answered

a question this act god damn it I didn't do anything I don't feel like I should be bleeding an ocular migraine I think it's called there's some shit yeah why don't you let me read the next question or something I'll forward it to you

I really will like computer is covered in I don't know here I got it this one can I ask out a twitch streamer this is from another lady we'll call her Zelda Zelda is

the princess the lady that needs to be you're over explaining the name Link is the character a couple of details should I ask out a twitch streamer that I've been following for about a year a couple of details he's on the east coast

I'm in California I wouldn't be much of an ask out as an ask to do a literal online date he's definitely single and I'm pretty sure he is interested in women but I've never met him in person he only knows that I exist as a username that pops up in the chat he doesn't know what I look like

or who I am other than what I reveal in the chat I only twitch prime to his channel no donation or gifted subscriptions so I'm not an important financial supporter to his community but he doesn't have that many viewers maybe around 80 to 150

on an average day so he does know my name and messages in the chat and as an aside I know he does read my messages because he'll address my username slash message or read the message out loud I feel like

your best chance for success there's an in between step here from being in the chat non prime user he responds to your messages to will you go on an online date with me something needs to happen in between

because she's gone from A to C and there's no B situation so he has to see her in a way an email no I wouldn't say that a DM I'm trying to be nice but the answer is no

he shakes the twitch streamer the answer is a little bit no well maybe not she's a big gamer and she loves watching games it could be a perfect fit but for you to be like you don't even support the twitch channel financially

to just be like let's go on an online date let's enter into a long distance relationship how's that I like to watch you play video games how would you like to be my boyfriend from across the continent so she should donate to his channel she should follow him on instagram or tiktok that's good

something where you can see each other and see if the physical vibe is there and matches the emotional vibe that actually only felt currently one way you to him so yeah there's the name between step why don't you move it to another app

a DM source an app maybe where there's a bit more I don't know anything about twitch but I feel like an app where there's a little more like one to one engagement rather than like you chatting and him like shouting out a bunch of people yeah I've been dabbling with twitching

again slash now tiktok does video game live streams so you can do it integrated into there oh we should do the tiktok video game live can we do it together we can do well I got a key that lets me stream from my

computer slash TV to tiktok directly wow so I wonder if there's a way for you not like me and you in a separate room we have to be in front of my computer alright so we'd have to do it when I'm in town but I want to do the thing where we play golden eye against each other that's good golden eyes not available yet

but it will be soon and then we can do it that's good yeah as soon as you we could probably youtube and or twitch that we're just not tiktok right now yeah okay we should do that um but yeah find us instagram and or twitter and or tiktok or whatever yeah

have a one on one chatting situation right you can try to move it to one on one without asking him out yet try to move it to a one on one situation another platform get off twitch as a gamer mm-hmm and like I say this just strictly as

a video gamer yeah I can't have anything clouding my shit when I'm fucking in front of the tube like that what games do you play Tetris and you do the mini golf right yeah I do a very true reality mini golf and I can't have like a

a girl in my life clouding that I have to be a hundred percent all in or I'm all out you don't have to worry about a girl entering your life and drawing your attention away from Tetris I wouldn't worry about that because like I'm trying to set up like

what's the highest level you got to in Tetris for because then they start coming down pretty fast yeah and like I'm like constantly thinking about girls they cloud my vision whether I want them to or not the siren song is too loud for me

and then I can't set up that alleyway where like one long piece gets a Tetris and since yeah whatever in level four you can't do that you'll yeah level three level three is my max and I've never been to level four basically I've gotten 29 lines

man that sucks yeah thank you the easy part is keeping the women away at BAE okay let's take another break

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this headgum podcast you know Aura Frames is sponsoring not just this episode but the entire headgum network Jake wow that's correct I mean this might be the Goat Father's Day gift I think it actually is yeah yeah not just

Father's Day but if for any not so tech savvy family member that you need a gift for soon these digital photo frames might be the best of all time yeah for me personally these things are perfect I'll tell you why as you know

I am expecting my first child we got one for Jill's parents we got one for Jill's grandma we got one for my parents so there are three of these bad boys in our family right now but they're great

really easy way to like stay in touch with your family you can upload as many photos as you want directly into my parents kitchen it's really nice oh that's cool so you take a photo of anything perhaps a baby and then it goes to their digital photo yeah frame this is actually how we

told Jill's grandma she was pregnant we got her the Aura frame we plugged it in Jill's grandma was pregnant really nice asshole this was actually a really sweet moment for me and my wife and you're trying to make a joke of it I was just being goofy

a little bit like this is how I told my grandma she was pregnant yeah yeah kind of like a she misheard it or something like that or the way you said it was kind of like could go either way by the way Jill's grandma is pregnant oh my god Jill's grandma is 90 and pregnant it's pretty cool and you told

me with a digital photo frame holy smokes and we let her know with an aura yeah thank you the aura announcement so you can instantly frame photos from any device anywhere and invite the whole family in on the fun through the aura app

add me to your aura app I'd love to upload just a picture of me like at a pool or something that could be funny yeah like your banana your dog alongside pictures of my daughter yeah yeah exactly you can even preload photos and add a personal video message that will display

as soon as your dad or anybody connects to the frame yeah it's a great gift a really really iconic gift and right now you can save on the perfect father's visit aura frames that's a u r a frames dot com and our listeners can use code head gum to get up to

thirty dollars off plus free shipping on the best selling frames there it is oh wow this is timely the deal ends on June 18th so don't wait terms and conditions apply that's aura frames a u r a frames dot com okay go get your parent something

alright and use the code head gum for thirty dollars off plus free shipping thank you aura and now back to the head gum podcast you were listening to and we're back we got one last question about a college roommate trouble okay it's a twin related question

twins that's right so I'll call him David Jeff let's go Jeff I saw him more recently I love the podcast and was wondering if you can help me out I just got accepted into Indiana University and I'm in the process of picking a dorm and a roommate

I found the perfect place to live but my twin brother wants to be my roommate I really wanted to branch out and meet new people but I also don't want to let my bro down should I try looking for a new roommate or live with my twin brother for a year any advice would be greatly appreciated this reminds me of

the story that Jeff and Dave went to the same school freshman year oh they both went to James Madison I didn't know that and they lived in different dorms and they would pass each other on campus and pretend they didn't know each other

they look more different now but at the time they were identical twins yeah two guys they would pass each other and not even say hello just so like if one person saw that they'd be like what yeah and sometimes people would say to Jeff hey Dave

and he would say hey just basically kind of assume his identity for a brief spell so they would pretend that the other didn't exist to the point where it's like I don't not only want to live with you but I don't even want to acknowledge that you exist in the school you don't exist to me and also not even acknowledging

the other person's existence to strangers because you would be like hi Dave and rather than being like no Dave is my twin they would just be like and then Jeff was like I can't handle this anymore I'm moving to NYU yeah I don't think you ever liked James Madison as much as Dave did interesting yeah it must be

a nature versus nurture thing I get the I mean yeah I think you should just tell your brother that you don't have to make it about him you don't have to be like I don't want to live with you you just make it about you say I would love

to live with you but I really want to have like an independent time at school yeah did you have this option where it's like do you want to live with someone or do you want to live with a stranger I think in my school you maybe could have like requested a roommate and they've granted

them and I also know that like freshman years some people like traded dorms once we made friends but yeah I didn't know anybody so I just rolled the dice yeah I mean it seems like a totally normal ask and it might be slightly offensive at first especially if he wants to live with you it's like you could still

make friends and live with your twin but it's a little weird to have identical twins in the dorm the same dorm I mean I get both sides because I get why he wants he was like oh it would be more comfortable than living with a total stranger yeah it'll be better but you're like well I actually want the college experience which is to

potentially have a bad roommate yeah but you don't have to do it for you have to do it for that long it's all if it's often you can move so I say roll the dice see if you can make a brand new friend have the like the real college experience maybe you'll be like wow my brother was right

and I want to move in with him but he got a great roommate he doesn't want to live with you anymore he actually wants to divorce you as your brother he wants to legally un-twin could you do that make any different enough yeah you requested new birthday I still

I'll still be your cousin but I just don't want to be your brother or your twin yeah were your dorms bigger than this room like our dorms were half the size of this room and then sometimes it was three strangers 18 year old dudes just living in a small

box like this I think my dorm was probably the exact size of this room maybe a tiny little bit wider because we had the bunk beds over there can on the bottom me on the top my computer over there where that door is Ken's computer here

and then along this right here we had two reclining chairs wow that we picked up at Salvation Army holy smokes you brought them into the room brought them into the room mini fridge there could you do that add furniture to your dorm

um yeah it was it was legal video games tv did you get a big screen yeah we had the the mini oh wait the yeah we had the mini fridge there with the tv on top of the mini fridge wow big tv it was I don't think it was big

big tv's cost a lot of money back then yeah but ken worked it best by so we got it for a discount holy shit yeah ken was a 51 year old manager right you met ken the day before you were supposed to start college ken was a non matriculated 51 year old man uh

manager with a family of four who actually shared the dorm with us our tv was so small but like you know cause tv's were expensive so like we had like a little small like tube television yeah but we had one of the few tv's in the hallway or in the dorm hall

and I remember I started college September of 2001 so when 9-11 happened everybody was just in my room watching that tv but I was still sleeping so I woke up and a bunch of people were in my room watching a small tv that's crazy

and that's how I like I found out about 9-11 wow what a fucking moment it's kind of crazy too like you went to school in 2001 and it was so different even three years later when I went to school for the first time in 2004 yeah yeah by then it's like everyone had we had like flat screen tv's

in our dorm room and we also had like big computers like you know a computer with a monitor that you had to bring in no laptops quite yet I got my first laptop at school but it didn't have wifi you had to like plug into the yeah and then like the 9-11 like rockier college experience or was that

not college yet it was you know it was four years after any tragedy national or otherwise that sort of defined your first week at college I'm wondering the Yankees blew the ALCS against the Red Sox

I think we got swept doesn't matter doesn't matter Johnny Damon hits a towering grand slam in game four no chance of a comeback I think that doesn't matter I mean yeah kind of like cause that was...

George Bush won that year too that was I remember on election night going to bed everyone on my floor as the results came in chanted four more years they all liked Bush and I remember just leaning against I felt like I have to transfer

I can't be here I'm too big of a John Kerry fan to be at the school yeah everybody fucking loved Bush at that school four more years yep then you ended up going to John Kerry's school

that's correct Hunter did he go to Hunter no but you didn't transfer to Hunter did you John Kerry's actual school Southern Connecticut State University he's the first presidential candidate to go to a Southern Connecticut State

SCSU did we answer this guy's question it's fine to tell your brother that you don't want to live with him I don't think you're going to hurt his feelings especially if you don't make it like I don't want to live with you just make it about enriching your own personal experience cool alright thanks for

writing in questions if you got questions or theme songs we need more send them all down to ifirishow at gmail.com that's right it's the perfect time we've cleaned out the inbox we're reading them as they come in now you heard us read one from September that's this month

oh wow I emailed the lady to see where in LA did you meet this guy and she responded what did she say a follow up pup within the same episode that's incredible this doesn't usually happen this is so cool

wow she said hey can you not email me here I just meant to sort of ask the chat show and now it feels like you're taking it personally please do not read my question on the show I wonder if we can

we have to retake that whole segment ok here we go so my friend went to San Francisco a few months ago and met a group of guys while we were there at the Dodger game she posted a story on Instagram and the San Francisco guys said he was also in LA

and to come to the Victorian that night where's the Victorian do you know that Casey no I've never been there the Victorian oh it's a Santa Monica thing there you go wow so they went from Dodger stadium to Santa Monica very long drive

we went briefly but ended up going to someone's place to play drinking games after last call wow the place we ended up at was my guys apartment and as a brief update to the below we've still been texting relatively frequently and there are some loose plants to meet up

but it's very non-committal I'm at a weird place where I'm super excited about them and still intrigued by just how much we hit it off but also logically know that there's a good chance we mutually fade away again any advice would be interested love you guys amazing does that change anything

no I think the advice is still in line and it sounds like she might have been doing it on her own anyway they're still like chatting flirting and the plants are remaining non-committal which I think is the correct vibe it seems like Instagram is now more of a dating app than actual dating apps now

yeah for sure you say like hey I'm here, people respond DM's it's an instant feeder and then the grid the actual main feed of Instagram is dead who's posting just a picture of me on my birthday I do it every day

did you say I do it every day? sorry did you say I do it every day I said you said I do it every day no I don't, I do it on my birthday my birthday every day I'm gonna have one birthday a year just give me the fucking turkey

clearly that's what you're angling for or something that's a turkey that's an absolute turkey you fucking fumbled your joke the misspeak there you go I'm catching you on that bullshit what about before that

if I hadn't brought that up at all um it's tough to say it's tough to say you had a couple good cracks this episode you might have gotten a golden mic you sort of talked about me fucking a door for a while what do you like that that was good

alright well thanks for yeah Queen Elizabeth for writing in more insight more videos of us on our Patreon and of course if you listen to this and want to watch it it's on our YouTube channel

the if I were you show YouTube channel thanks for writing in thanks for watching, thanks for listening and we'll be back next week goodbye everybody but you gotta fight every battle

you gotta travel so far because everything you want is on the other side of art you gotta fight every battle

you gotta travel so far because everything you want is on the other side of art because everything

you want is on the other side of art hit thumb original