If I Were You - Testing Testing: Family Feud

Episode Date: September 2, 2021

Back on a Thursday, surveying 100 people, top answers on the board... It's time to play the feud! See omny.fm/listener for privacy information....

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a HitGum Original. And we're back on a Thursday. On a Thursday. Wow. Testing, testing, going strong. This is episode eight. Yes. Of our side pod.
Starting point is 00:00:17 That's correct. Of our side hustle. Eight is great. You want to know why? Why? Because you and I are in the same room. That's right. For the first time, probably in two years,
Starting point is 00:00:27 we're sitting across and staring at each other. I don't even know how to handle this right now. It's weird. I don't know whether to stare at you or at my phone, on my computer. We didn't record a podcast when I was in LA. No. So this is the first in-person podcast.
Starting point is 00:00:41 I think since last October before the pandemic. Wow. Wow. That's crazy. And now if this way feels weirder. Yeah, definitely. There's no lag to cut out. It's going to be great to edit.
Starting point is 00:00:53 But people will actually just notice though, it's harder for you, like easier for you to edit, but harder for people to listen to. People will be like, the energy was off. Because they weren't alone in a room. Yeah. Because we're weird. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:01:07 And it would be cool if one of us got COVID because of this. Right. That would be nice. It'd be like, we waited and waited and waited. And then like, boom, I took a flight and I got you infected. Yeah. If anything, it would be me that got COVID and you that has COVID. I see.
Starting point is 00:01:21 Because you were on a Delta flight to get the Delta variant. And then I gave it to you. Just now. Can I be a carrier without being infected? I thought that was, I thought they said no. Yeah. I could be like asymptomatic and give you a bad version of it. Right.
Starting point is 00:01:38 Yeah. I think that's what I remember. But you know, seems like we learn new things every day. So I'm done pretending I know anything about COVID. That's cool. All right. So. Anyways, the test about COVID.
Starting point is 00:01:49 Yeah. So this is all about immunology, different diseases, protein strands, DNA. I don't need to be an expert. You know, I don't need a mask. I just need a flask. No, I thought it would be fun to play the feud. The feud. The feud.
Starting point is 00:02:07 The feud. Nice. Family feud. Yeah. Family feud as a test. So I'm guessing what a hundred people surveyed said. Exactly. I was going to ask you if you remember watching the show and remember what it was about.
Starting point is 00:02:20 Family feud. It was my favorite. Like this and gladiators. That was like when I stayed home from school. That was my shit. Price is right. Gladiators. Price is right.
Starting point is 00:02:30 Springer. I mean. Yeah. I love feet. I love feet. Yeah. So the way it works is they surveyed a hundred people and then people sort of take turns guessing what they think other people respond to.
Starting point is 00:02:43 What's the most popular response? Yeah. And it's kind of good. You have your finger on the pulse. I think so. You get it. I like to believe I do. But since we can't play like the full version of the game I thought it would be fun.
Starting point is 00:02:54 I don't have my family here with me. Yeah. I thought my family could field two teams. Because you have what 10, a five on five within the family. I guess I guess it would be four on four. There's eight of us. But if we if we were allowed sig sig ofs then yeah we'd be fine. Okay.
Starting point is 00:03:10 So here we go. We're going to say let's try to since you're not playing all the way to get all a hundred of the responses we'll see if you can get what 60 people have replied to. Okay. So I'm trying to guess the the number one answer. Number one will sometimes get you 60 and then sometimes it'll take like the number one, two, three answer. Okay.
Starting point is 00:03:29 Got it. I'll start you off with an easy one just so like acclimate us and get into the game so people understand what the fuck we're talking. Yeah. Because there's some people who have never even heard of Family Feud so this is how it goes. Yeah. Assume that I but in fact it was just this website asked 100 people name something you
Starting point is 00:03:45 might eat with a hamburger and then Jake buzzes in and then he's trying to guess what other people have said. Okay. So I'm going to go ahead but I'm going to I'm going to confer with the family. We all nod. Yeah. And I say fries. And everyone says good answer.
Starting point is 00:04:00 Good answer. Yeah. Good answer. We clap. And then I point to the board. Survey says. Fries. 60 of the hundred people said fries.
Starting point is 00:04:08 Wow. So you already won that round because you got straight to 60. Yeah. Do you want to go through and try to name the other things? See how good you do. Sure. Pickle. Pickles.
Starting point is 00:04:16 Ding. It is the last number of responses. Only three people said pickles but it is on there. So you got the number one and the number seven. Oh my God. You're up to 63 of the hundred responses. All right. All in between.
Starting point is 00:04:29 Let's fucking say coleslaw. Coleslaw. Not on there. Really? Coleslaw is not on there. Fuck it. All right. Potato chips.
Starting point is 00:04:39 Potato chips. Also a big red X. What? Potato chips is not on this list. Yeah. I guess fries and compass is all fried potato snacks. That's bizarre. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:48 Fucking. Okay. A hot dog. Barbecue style. Hot dog is not on this. Three X's and you're out. I'm out. Fortunately you already got to 63 so that's good enough.
Starting point is 00:04:56 What are the other ones? Number two is soup with 12 people said soup. What? Yeah. Number three is salad. Yeah. Nine people said salad. I feel like coleslaw and compass is a salad.
Starting point is 00:05:07 Kind of but it's its own beast to me. And then the last two are onion rings and tater tots. Yeah. Yeah. That makes sense. You'll give it that. Okay. Here's one that's a little more evenly split.
Starting point is 00:05:18 All right. Name something you haven't done since high school gym class. So we asked 100 people to name something they haven't done since high school gym class. What do you got? Let's go dodge ball. Survey says ding dodge ball. Number two response with 23 people said dodge ball. Okay.
Starting point is 00:05:38 So you're looking to get 37 more responses. 23 have said dodge ball. All right. So I'm basically deciding for me I'm deciding between sports ish you know like played basketball or bad that's an example. The other one is presidential fitness test style stuff. That's right. So I'll go ahead and say sit ups.
Starting point is 00:06:02 Sit ups ding number four answer nine people responded sit ups. So you got nine from sit ups 23 from dodge ball. I got to get that number one answer groups take a group shower. I'll give you this one. It's change in a locker room. Okay. But only three people said that. All right.
Starting point is 00:06:21 So you're up to 35. That's good. That means I'm not I'm not. I have three X's to get through. Yes. Okay. So let's fucking let's let's keep on going with the presidential fitness thing. We'll say push ups push ups number three answer 21 ding you're up to 57.
Starting point is 00:06:36 Wow. Without a single X. And how about a pull ups pull ups is not on here. Your first X. All right. I need three. Then I said sit ups I said push ups fucking jog run I need a need a more specific answer than that run on a track.
Starting point is 00:06:57 I'll give it to you. It's run a mile. It's run a mile. Yeah. It's the presidential fitness thing. That is right. And how many that's 25 was the number one answer. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:07:06 A mile. Wow. High school. Okay. All right. Good to see it. That'll get you there. That'll get you to 75.
Starting point is 00:07:15 The other ones are lift weights, swim laps, tennis randomly and then the last one is just exercise which kind of feels weird because that's all of that. Yeah. That's all of them. Swim laps was one that I was going to guess. Okay. Ready. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:07:29 Name a country that speaks Spanish. Okay. The number one answer is Spain nailed it. The number one answer is Spain with 38 people. All right. Mexico. Number two answer, Mexico, 24, you're already over the 62, but let's keep it going just for fun.
Starting point is 00:07:46 Okay. I'm going to go ahead and guess that some people got it wrong and said Brazil. Ooh. Incorrect. Yeah. Nobody said Brazil. Okay. They must have asked some pretty smart Americans.
Starting point is 00:07:57 Okay. So Spain and Mexico. That's right. Puerto Rico. Puerto Rico is not on there. Two X's. It's a good thing you nailed it in two. Okay.
Starting point is 00:08:11 So other middle America country, Central America or South America, I'm going to guess Argentina. Argentina is on the list with four people responded. How many more are there? You got like five more. You got the number three and number four still missing. Yeah. Now I don't know what fucking countries speak Portuguese for Spanish and I'm freaking out.
Starting point is 00:08:40 Yeah. You're like, I'm going to say some dumbasses said Brazil. Well, that's just the way I know that they speak Portuguese and Brazil and Portugal, right? Do they say Portugal's on there, isn't it? Portugal is not on there. Third X. The number three answer is the United States.
Starting point is 00:08:56 Oh, nice. That's a fun little curve ball and Cuba is the other big one. Okay. Here we go. Name a famous wizard. We asked a hundred people to name a famous wizard. This one's built for me. Yes.
Starting point is 00:09:13 Let's go Harry Potter. I think it's going to be number one. Correct. 37 people said Harry Potter. And then it's going to, it's got to be Gandalf. Gandalf is third with 11 people. You're up to 48. Whoa.
Starting point is 00:09:23 What's another wizard besides Harry and Gandalf? It's tough. Is there a Disney one? Wizard, wizard. Oh, the Wizard of Oz. That's correct. With eight people that said the Wizard of Oz. So that's 48.
Starting point is 00:09:36 Oh, and you're only at 56. You need one more. It might be hard. And it's number, this is the number two wizard? Yeah. Number two wizard. The number two wizard, the fucking, oh no, it's, it's, it's got to be, oh, the Wizard of Waverly Place X.
Starting point is 00:09:59 One incorrect answer. The wizard from Nobody Beats the Wiz. Incorrect too. Oh, it's hard. I know the name, but like, I don't know why I know the name, if that makes sense. Right. Yeah. Oh, it's like Merlin.
Starting point is 00:10:18 Yes. That's correct. Merlin. What is Merlin? I don't, I think it's like a storybook thing. I'm not entirely sure. Merlin, 26 people just said Merlin. Just a famous wizard name.
Starting point is 00:10:27 That's right. Yeah. There you have it. Okay, another one? Yeah. These are funny. These are very funny. What is the most stressful thing in the life of a 25 year old woman?
Starting point is 00:10:44 Whoa. The most, the work? That is the number two answer with 26 responses work. Great. So the first one's dating. That's right. Love life. 28 people.
Starting point is 00:10:58 24. All right. Family? Family is, yes, the fourth answer, 13 people. You're over the 60 threshold already. It's number three. Finances. Finances.
Starting point is 00:11:10 Yeah. I feel like that would work. And then there's school friends, clothes, roommate, and starting a family, which I guess feels like family. I guess it's just, this is like, what's the stressful thing in anyone's life? That's right. Work, friends, family, finances. Sure.
Starting point is 00:11:24 Oh, this is a good one. How long is an unbearable commute? So we asked 100 people, how long is an unbearable commute? Let's say an hour. That's the number one answer with 41 responses per hour. And then I think it's going to be, from there, people's tolerance are going to go lower. So we'll say 45 minutes. 45 minutes, the number three answer.
Starting point is 00:11:50 So you're up to, that's 15 people said it, you're up to 56, you just got to get one more. One hour and a half. That is the last answer, but it's still on the list with two people. So you're still at 58 under the threshold. 30 minutes. That's the number two answer. 26 people. That's not a bad commute.
Starting point is 00:12:08 Yeah. An unbearable at that. A little unbearable. Yeah. Only an hour a day. All right. You're kicking butt. Should we raise the threshold past 60?
Starting point is 00:12:16 I guess so. Okay. Let's see if you can get to 70 on some of these, right? We can raise the threshold, but I don't want anyone to think it's because it was too easy. I'm actually just really good. Right. Yeah. The game is hard, but so are you.
Starting point is 00:12:29 Yeah. You are rock hard, which is cool to see for the first time because usually it's on a zoom. Yeah. Usually it's just waist up. I can't tell. Yeah. All right. Let's take a break and then I'll try to find some harder ones and you can try to get
Starting point is 00:12:38 to 70 of 100 responses. Nice. Nice. On the other side of these messages. Thank you to Helix Sleep for sponsoring this episode of our show. Hell yes. Thank you for making the sleep test, the sleep exam, and letting me ace it and become the doctor of the mattress.
Starting point is 00:12:59 Yes, sir. Yeah. So Helix makes a really great mattress line and you take a little sleep quiz to see what mattress is right for you. Yeah, right. Jake's been bragging about completing this two minute honestly like Buzzfeed light quiz. I don't brag about completing it. I brag about acing it because you got the mattress and it was great or yeah, I got the
Starting point is 00:13:28 perfect mattress. Thank God. Thank God I took that test. That's right. And if you want the perfect mattress, you can go to helixsleep.com slash if I were you for 20% off all mattress orders and two free pillows. Amazing. Free pillows.
Starting point is 00:13:41 Come on. Yes. This is their best offer yet and no, it won't last long with Helix. The better sleep starts now. So regardless of how you sleep, whether you like it soft, medium or firm, Helix has 20 unique mattresses just ready to go based on how you fill up that sleep preference and they'll send you the best one and if you go to helixsleep.com slash if I were you, that's 20% off.
Starting point is 00:14:03 Amazing. Thank you, Helix. Sleep well. Thank you to Stamps.com for sponsoring this episode of our show, visiting the post office and dealing with shipping and handling is probably one of the most stressful parts of owning a business. But with Stamps.com, all you need is a computer and a printer and they can bring the post office in your office.
Starting point is 00:14:22 So if you need a package pickup, you can easily schedule it. If you need to sell products online, Stamps.com seamlessly connects with every major marketplace and shopping cart running a business isn't cheap. So Stamps.com has huge carrier discounts. We're talking up to 84% off USPS and UPS rates, holy smokes. And for 25 years, Stamps.com has been indispensable for over one million businesses. So if one million businesses can trust Stamps.com, certainly you can too. Set your business up for success with Stamps.com today.
Starting point is 00:14:56 Just sign up with promo code if I were you for a special offer that includes a four week trial plus free postage and a free digital scale. Wow. No long-term commitments or contracts. Just go to Stamps.com. You click the microphone at the top of the page and enter code if I were you and that gets you a free four week trial, free postage and a digital scale. That sounds pretty good.
Starting point is 00:15:18 Thank you Stamps.com for sponsoring this show. The Hurwitz family with a commanding lead. Alright now shit's about to get hard and you're gonna have to name more. Good. Fucking right. We are looking. I surveyed. This one I actually personally did.
Starting point is 00:15:42 I'm looking for a challenge. That's what I'm looking for. I surveyed a hundred people to tell me a type of gun that doesn't shoot bullets. That doesn't shoot bullets. I'm not ready for this. I don't know any other. Let's see if you can match 70 people's responses. A radar gun.
Starting point is 00:16:00 A radar gun. Number one answer. None. None? Oddly enough. Look off with that. Yeah. Look off with that.
Starting point is 00:16:09 I would think it would be up there too. Okay. Laser gun. Another X. What are you talking about? Yes. I didn't even have to raise the bar. A cap gun.
Starting point is 00:16:20 What's a cap gun? Forget it. Then I didn't guess it. If you don't see it on the list you wouldn't have asked. Exactly. Okay. So I'm not looking. I'm not thinking about cap guns.
Starting point is 00:16:30 You never played with a cap gun when you were a kid? Well like one of those little potato guns? It was like a red strip of paper with a tiny little like, I don't know, like fire cracker. Like it just made the noise. Yeah. Well it's sparking. It would smoke. Oh no.
Starting point is 00:16:43 So yeah. But no, that wasn't my guess. I was just asking if you ever heard of cap guns. I forgot you were born in 1948. Potato gun. Potato gun is not on this list. 0 for 3. 0 for 3.
Starting point is 00:16:53 You didn't name any of the answers. Give me these fucking answers. Number one. Nail gun. Okay. Makes sense. Yeah. Number two.
Starting point is 00:17:02 Stun gun. Okay. All right. Sure. Number three is water gun. Yeah. That makes sense. It's a baby.
Starting point is 00:17:10 Again. Yeah. Obvious when you hear it. Paintball. Yeah. Yep. Biceps. Which is kind of a cheeky answer.
Starting point is 00:17:18 Cheeky. And nothing more cheeky than two people who said son of a gun. Oh my God. You shouldn't be surveying everybody. Too fucking. I didn't deserve to be surveying. Two witty assholes said son of a gun. I can't believe no one said radar and two people said son of a gun.
Starting point is 00:17:33 Yeah. Weird. Radar was my only guess. All right. Here's another one that's a little less obscure. Name a place you might not get cell phone reception. The woods. Wilderness.
Starting point is 00:17:45 Number one answer. 26 people. Okay. The ocean. The ocean. Out on a boat. Number four. Boat slash ocean.
Starting point is 00:17:53 14 people. You're up to 40. 40 responses. The air. Huh. The air on a plane. That is not on here. That's not on there.
Starting point is 00:18:02 That's not on there. Son of a gun. Oh, that's number two. Okay. Not getting cell phone reception. Oh, basement. That's the number two answer with 24. So you're up to 50 plus 14.
Starting point is 00:18:16 That's 64. Okay. That would have done it in round one. You're going to get one more. I need that. Okay. There's only way. I have to get one more at least.
Starting point is 00:18:24 Okay. Okay. So I've said, we said wilderness. Basement and boat slash ocean. Fucking mountains. Mountains is part of the wilderness. Yeah. That's why, you know, not everybody knows what other people said.
Starting point is 00:18:36 Yeah. It's wilderness slash mountains. Okay. All right. Well, you didn't tell me it was wilderness slash mountains. So I won't give you the red X. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:18:44 You won't give me red X. You did get a red X earlier for air. I think it was. I said a plane. Yeah. It's not on here. Plane's not on there? Not on here.
Starting point is 00:18:52 I forgot. I forgot. That just happened. Okay. Okay. I got one. Yeah. Fucking.
Starting point is 00:19:00 Hmm. Like in a, like a tall building, an office building. Yes. It's on here. 13. You're over 70. Good on you. What are the other ones?
Starting point is 00:19:12 Basement is a big one. Oh, you said that. Yeah. And tunnel is a big one. Tunnel. Going through a tunnel. Going through a tunnel. And an elevator.
Starting point is 00:19:20 Yep. Yep. Yep. Yep. Okay. All right. Good job. Way to make it happen.
Starting point is 00:19:28 Here's a tough one. People might grow themselves. Let's go garden style plants. We'll go like, we'll go friggin like lettuce. Lettuce is not on this list. Tomatoes. Tomatoes number one. 33 people said tomatoes, if you can believe it.
Starting point is 00:19:46 Okay. Like, all right. So I'm not guessing this, but I just want to know if like spinach and kale companies lettuce. Yeah. Okay. That's not on this list. Not on this list.
Starting point is 00:20:00 Okay. Great. Ganja. What? Marijuana plants. X. Absolute X. That's two X's.
Starting point is 00:20:08 So far you got nailed tomatoes and got lettuce wrong and weed wrong. Okay. And this is plants people grow themselves. I mean, what else do people grow themselves? Yeah. I would say you probably only have an opportunity to get the number two answer. Everything else is pretty weird. Okay.
Starting point is 00:20:26 Basil. No. Basil is not on here either. Oddly. Number two is flowers slash roses. Nice. That makes sense, right? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:20:34 The rest of them are kind of odd. Apples are third. Which I think is a tree. Yeah. Zucchini. Sure. Not sure why. Plums.
Starting point is 00:20:43 Plums. How many people said plums? Oh, you know what? Grass is on here and I think they mean weed. So I'll give you that one. You do? Yeah. Okay.
Starting point is 00:20:53 All right. Let's see. That was a tough one. Nailed tomatoes though. Yeah, that was hard. That was hard. Here we go. Name something you might put in your bed before you go to sleep to keep you warm at night.
Starting point is 00:21:05 Uh-oh. Oh, fucking. You think this would only be one answer, but I guess there's a bunch of diverse answers. Something that you keep yourself warm with in bed that you put in the bed before you go to sleep. That's right. Inside the bed, like not an extra blanket? Blanket is the number one answer.
Starting point is 00:21:22 So it's just stuff that you have all over the bed. 33 people said blanket. Yes. Okay. A blanket. A lover. Another person. Yes.
Starting point is 00:21:31 26 people. So you're up to 59. All right. Um, a teddy bear? No. Teddy bear is not on here. Pillow? Uh, no.
Starting point is 00:21:41 Two X's right there. No pillows. Okay. Um. Ah, fuck. Jesus. What do they mean? What do you put in the bed to keep warm?
Starting point is 00:21:54 Yeah. It's weird. Um, uh, a hot, one of those hot water bags. That's actually, yes. A hot water bottle is the last answer. Two people said it. What am I at? Uh, you're at 61.
Starting point is 00:22:06 Hmm. Uh, slippers? Uh, stockings? Socks is on here. Socks is on here. That's seven. That's 68. You need two more.
Starting point is 00:22:17 One answer. Okay. Just out of curiosity, we already have blanket. Electric blanket would not be like, that's, it's sort of on here because it says heater. Electric heater? You put that in a bed? Yeah. So I'll give you that heater.
Starting point is 00:22:34 Pyjamas is third, which feels like you're just going to wear it. And then a dog or a cat is, has six people. That's sort of a cute answer. Uh, okay. Here's an interesting one. Name a type of vehicle you really wouldn't want to hit while driving. Fire truck? Second answer is fire truck with 16 people.
Starting point is 00:22:53 Um, motorcycle. Motorcycle, not on here. Red X. Well, you really shouldn't want to hit that because then I feel like you definitely killed somebody. Yeah. Okay. Uh, truck, like a Mack truck? Uh, no, not on here.
Starting point is 00:23:07 Not on, you want to hit a truck when you, okay. Fire truck, yes. Fire truck, but no. Okay. Only got one last X. Train. Train is fourth. Yes.
Starting point is 00:23:17 Ten people said train. So you're 26. Driving? Yeah. You're missing the number one answer. 44 people said this one. Just another car? Uh, no, that is not on here.
Starting point is 00:23:26 I'm sorry. A horse trailer. Uh, that's, you can stop guessing. You're at four Xs at this point. The number one car you wouldn't want to hit while driving. I'll give people a chance at home to think for a few seconds. 44 people out there for every hundred probably are thinking this answer, which is a police car.
Starting point is 00:23:45 Oh, yeah. Number one is police car number three. You didn't get his ambulance. And then hearse, Hummer and limo. Of course. Yeah. I wouldn't be afraid to hit a Hummer, but not a truck. All right.
Starting point is 00:24:00 Here's a, here's a fun one. Yeah. For all you people who have pains and sores, name a part of your body you might say has an ache. Back. Back is number three with 11 people. Head. Head number one, 34.
Starting point is 00:24:12 You're up to 45. Stomach. Stomach number two. Nailed it. 33 people said stomach. 34 people said head. 11 people said back. Foot.
Starting point is 00:24:22 Foot is not on this list. Chest. Chest is not on this list. Cock. Cock is first with 58 people said cock. I knew it. No, you're missing tooth, muscle, knee, and ear, of course. And ear.
Starting point is 00:24:42 You're trying to get me to spit out the water. Even an ear ache. Ear. Okay. Another one that has. I'm looking for ear. You were looking for ear. I have a weird ear.
Starting point is 00:24:55 This one's pretty fun. Yeah. At your job, out of every 60 minutes in an hour, how many do you spend doing actual work? Whoa. This is not my answer. No. This is what I'm thinking. 100 people.
Starting point is 00:25:08 Yes, of course. 15 minutes. 15 minutes is almost the last answer. Five people said that. Okay. I think that's the most honest one. Let's say half an hour. Half an hour is number two with 23 people.
Starting point is 00:25:20 So you're up to 28. And then everybody else is going to say 45. Yeah. That's the number one answer. 30 people. And some fuckers are going to say an hour because they work hard. Yeah. 12 people said that full hour.
Starting point is 00:25:32 Bullshit. Nobody takes. Bullshit. A full 100%. I don't think so. All right. I have an idea. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:25:40 There's so many of these. Why don't we take a break and then you try to give me some? I want to play. These are fun. I love it. Okay. Let's take another pause, come back and answer some more family feud style questions. Doo doo doo.
Starting point is 00:25:51 Woo. Doo doo doo. Doo doo doo. Doo doo doo. Doo doo doo. Doo doo doo. Thank you to Aura Frames for sponsoring this Head Gum podcast. You know, Aura Frames is sponsoring not just this episode, but the entire Head Gum network,
Starting point is 00:26:06 Jake. Wow. That's correct. I mean, this might be the Goat Father's Day gift. I think it actually is. Yeah. Yeah, not just Father's Day, but if for any not so tech savvy family member that you need a gift for soon, these digital photo frames might be the best of all time.
Starting point is 00:26:26 Yeah. For me personally, these things are perfect. I'll tell you why. As you know, I am expecting my first child. We got one for Jill's parents. Oh, wow. We got one for Jill's grandma. Holy smokes.
Starting point is 00:26:40 We got one for my parents. So there are three of these bad boys in our family right now, but they're great, really easy way to like stay in touch with your family. You can upload as many photos as you want directly into my parents kitchen. It's really nice. Oh, that's cool. So you take a photo of anything, perhaps a baby, and then it goes to their digital photo. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:27:02 Frame. This is actually how we told Jill's grandma. She was pregnant. We got her the aura frame. We plugged it in. Jill's grandma was pregnant. Really nice asshole. This was actually a really sweet moment for me and my wife and you're trying to make a
Starting point is 00:27:17 joke of it. I was just being goofy a little bit like, uh, this is how I told my grandma she was pregnant. Yeah. Yeah. Kind of like a, she misheard it or something like that. Or the way you said it was kind of like, could go either way. By the way, Jill's grandma is pregnant. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:27:33 Jill's grandma is 90 and pregnant. It's pretty cool. She told me with a digital photo frame. Holy smokes. And we let her know with an aura. Yeah. Thank you. The aura announcement.
Starting point is 00:27:44 So you can instantly frame photos from any device anywhere and invite the whole family in on the fun through the aura app. Add me to your aura app. I'd love to upload just a picture of me like at a pool or something that could be funny. Yeah. Like your banana or your dog alongside pictures of my daughter. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:03 Exactly. So you can upload photos and add a personal video message that will display as soon as your dad or anybody connects to the frame. Yeah. It's a great gift. A really, really iconic gift. And right now you can save on the perfect father's day gift and visit aura frames. That's A U R A frames.com.
Starting point is 00:28:21 And our listeners can use code head gum to get up to $30 off plus free shipping on the best selling frames. There it is. Oh wow. This is timely. So don't wait. Terms and conditions apply. That's aura frames A U R A frames.com.
Starting point is 00:28:37 Okay. Go get your parents something. All right. And use the code head gum for $30 off plus free shipping. Right on. Thank you, aura. And now back to the head gum podcast you were listening to. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp.
Starting point is 00:28:51 Thank you, BetterHelp. If you're finding yourself in a difficult, anxious, stressful situation talking to a professional licensed therapist is the best way to navigate yourself out of that difficult place. And it's not necessarily easy to find a therapist, especially one in your area, but BetterHelp makes that all easy because it's online therapy designed to be convenient, flexible and suitable to your schedule. You just fill out a brief questionnaire and get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for no additional charge.
Starting point is 00:29:23 It's incredibly helpful therapy has helped millions of people over thousands of years. So give therapy a try. It can give you the tools to find a more balanced life. I've tried therapy. It's been very helpful. So you can find that balance better with BetterHelp. All you got to do is go to betterhelp.com slash if I were you. You do that today.
Starting point is 00:29:44 You can get 10% off your first month. So the prices are already affordable because you're not paying rent for a building somewhere that you have to drive to and wait in a waiting room. This is done entirely online, but you're still getting professional licensed help and it's extra affordable. That's betterhelp.com slash if I were you. Check him out. Thanks, BetterHelp.
Starting point is 00:30:07 Okay, we're back round three. It's time for Jake to be the host. The Drew Carey meets Steve Harvey meets Ray Combs meets that first guy that sort of groped people on the day. That's right. A kiss for the ladies and a shake for the men. That's a very good answer and a smooch for me. Sideburns, the tie, the long thin microphone and the busy fingers.
Starting point is 00:30:36 Yeah. Okay. I am asking you, name something you'd hate to find swimming around you in your bathtub. A hundred people surveyed. Really? Yeah. I'm trying not to freak out because I'm on the spot slash clock, but I wouldn't want to see a fucking fish.
Starting point is 00:30:58 Congratulations, ding, ding, ding. That is the last answer. Why? No one gives a shit, but two people agreed with you, two son of a gun, a shark obviously would be a scary thing to find in a tub. That would be, but nobody else could think of that. They are not as creative as you. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:18 That's a snake. That's number two. It's number two answer. You were at 24. Interesting. What about a tadpole or a frog? That's sort of a scary thing to see. No.
Starting point is 00:31:30 No, everyone's finding them. Maybe you, but nobody else is afraid of a frog. 2X is already. This is hard. 2X is on the day. Give me a fucking eel, a stingray slash eel. Survey says, why? Why is everyone okay with that?
Starting point is 00:31:45 Why? Why is everyone okay with that? Because what you should have been afraid of was a rat or a mouse. A mouse swimming. Yeah. So it's almost like we're ignoring the bathtub completely. That's right. Okay.
Starting point is 00:31:55 What else would be weird? A cockroach. Yeah, sure. A cockroach. These are just bad things to have. A spider. Nobody cares. The itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout.
Starting point is 00:32:04 They didn't hear the bathtub part. They didn't hear the tub. A lizard? Yes. These are all non-waf course. And an alligator. So the water was just ignored completely. A rat in your bathtub.
Starting point is 00:32:18 Let's see how smart you are. How many pages is the longest book you've ever read? Oh, okay. I don't know the answer for that for me. Right. But... 100 people surveyed. 100 people surveyed.
Starting point is 00:32:33 Let's say 500. 15 people said that. The number four answer. Yeah. Let's double it and see if some fucking nerdos. I've read a 1000 page book. The number two answer. That's 16.
Starting point is 00:32:46 Okay. Wow. This is a very even distribution. 300 for my people in the back. That's... 10 people said that. The number five answer. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:32:59 G. Or six. 750. Right there. Smack dab. No, 750. 800. Really?
Starting point is 00:33:07 Yeah, really. So actually, you went from thinking this was pretty easy to you're at 41 and... Longer than a thousand. Is it possible? A book so long it's longer than a G? Let's say 1500 pages for my fucking crazy ass maniac readers. Survey says... Eh.
Starting point is 00:33:27 Okay, I'm out. I'm out of guesses. They see what you are. What's the number one answer? 250. That's very little. I know. It seems like a...
Starting point is 00:33:35 You should have fucking thought about the kind of people get surveyed. That's like the average. The average books length. That's pretty short. Not the longest book you've ever read. 250. Yeah. They surveyed 108 craters.
Starting point is 00:33:45 The number three answer is 100. Yeah. That's way too little. Those are the same people that haven't run a mile or done a sit up since Middle School. I can't even think of a book that's less than 100. I can't imagine that's the longest book. Yeah. 500 you got.
Starting point is 00:33:59 2000 was another one. Oh, interesting. Than 300, 200. 10. 10 pages. 10 pages. Very long book. And 50.
Starting point is 00:34:07 Let's... Let's... Think... Okay. What might a married man rather admit to his buddies than to his wife? I guess that he has a side piece slash cheating affair issue slash situation against his wife's will slash behind her back. The...
Starting point is 00:34:29 It's close. An extramarital relationship. No, there's one that's checked out another woman. Only four. So like it's kind of innocuous. You weren't that close, but I'll give it to you. You've got four. Okay.
Starting point is 00:34:42 Wow. So that would seem like it would be the number one thing. I guess number one is that they're at the bar and you don't want your old lady to know. Cheer style. No. That's... That's an answer. None of them are alcohol related.
Starting point is 00:34:55 Like... Not alcohol related. Uh... Uh... Just picture this on the original Family Feud long microphone. Got it. What money they have or something. Um...
Starting point is 00:35:07 Yeah, there's one that's... That you're in debt. Yeah. Okay. So that's what... You've got nine. These are people in the 40s who never want their wife to know that they're in debt and that they checked out another woman, uh...
Starting point is 00:35:19 That they're a closeted homosexual. They wouldn't want that. I think you have two. That might be three. We'll give you another guess. Uh... Yeah. I don't even know where to start.
Starting point is 00:35:33 Drug problem and then checked out another woman seemed to be the big things that people hide. Um... Uh... I bet it's something about sports, talking about sports or something like that. What's the number one answer? She's a bad cook. Ha ha ha ha ha!
Starting point is 00:35:50 My old man can't cook for shit. Uh... Don't... That you don't like your in-laws? Oh, that's a good one. That you don't like your wife's friends? Uh-huh. Do you have dirty pictures and magazines?
Starting point is 00:36:02 A playboy stack. But you're in debt that you checked out another woman, that you quit your job, or that the kid is ugly? That she's a... Is that one of them? Your child is ugly? Yes. Three people said that.
Starting point is 00:36:14 Three really sad people. I can't confide to my wife that our son is a fucking four. I swear our daughter's busted and I wouldn't dare bring it up with the old lady. No ball and chain can't know that our son is a dweeb. Oh, this one's pretty interesting. Tell me something for which Kentucky is famous. Okay. Now, this is more of my style slash speed because it's vaguely sports-related.
Starting point is 00:36:43 So number one is the Kentucky Derby. Correct. 40 people. The number one answer. Number two is Bourbon. That's actually number four. Okay. You are...
Starting point is 00:36:53 You're at 50. I assume slavery's not on there, so let's go with the Louisville Slugger Factory. No, that one, yes, neither of them are on there. Really? Yeah, no. Interesting. So Derby and Bourbon are number one and two. No, one and four.
Starting point is 00:37:11 One and four. College basketball? Yes. Wildcats College Sports. Yeah. That's 12. So you're at 62 for playing your rules. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:37:20 You need eight more. What else is Kentucky known for? Mitch McConnell, but it's probably not his. Oh, KFC. They do chicken rights. That's right. Absolutely. Number two answer, 22.
Starting point is 00:37:32 You have one. They are also famous for moonshine, coal, and bluegrass. Oh, yeah, the bluegrass state. Oh, this one's pretty apropos. Let's make this the last one and see if you can do it. Name something appealing about working from home. Wow. Well, you get to avoid human contact.
Starting point is 00:37:54 So COVID-wise, it's pretty efficient with regards to making sure that you don't transmit or receive the virus. Show me virus. You do have avoid coworkers. Oh, okay. Number four. You have four for that. Okay.
Starting point is 00:38:12 You get to slack off a little more because there's no boss there. Oh, okay. There's slack off is not, but it does say avoid boss, but it does say jack off. So I'll give you, you've got seven. Okay. Seven. You have no ants. You can sleep in, no commute.
Starting point is 00:38:30 Or those two different ones. Um, yeah, there's two. It's great commute. 17. Okay. Great commute. But a sleeping in one? Sleeping in is not one.
Starting point is 00:38:41 I'm going to give you an old X for that. Okay. What about, uh, you don't have to, is it like work hours are easier? Revisible hours. Yeah. That's right. That's right. That's number two answer.
Starting point is 00:38:54 Have I gotten the number one? No. Interesting. So I've gotten number like two, three and four. Yeah. Uh, avoid coworkers, uh, or two, three and six, but yeah, uh, no commute. No commute. It's got to be number one.
Starting point is 00:39:07 I can't believe something is more popular than avoiding a commute. Um, does it have to do with food? Is it like lunch? You don't have to, uh, you can just keep your lunch in your fridge and your fucking ticket. That's right. Number one answer. You have to keep your lunch in your fridge.
Starting point is 00:39:25 Yes. I have my pulse. No. No. Uh, okay. I know this. I'm working from home and I've already said avoiding my coworkers and I've always said you don't have to get into a car and it's a flexible work hours.
Starting point is 00:39:40 So you get to drink a beer at lunch with the guys complain about your wife's cooking and you're busting tweens. She's always busting me for having my dirty magazines. Uh, no. All right. What is it? No clothes slash dress code is the number one answer. Oh, because this is pre zoom.
Starting point is 00:40:02 Yeah. You got to be naked at home or just no, I think, you know, no dress code even. I feel like that was, uh, that even on zoom, people like, Oh yeah, I'm wearing pajama bottom. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. Um, you've also got C family, um, save money, uh, bathroom anytime, which is a weird rule
Starting point is 00:40:21 at the factory. You're allowed one shit a day. Yeah. They should change that. And no babysitter. Hmm. Uh, I imagine that would be a bad thing about working from home. You just have to fucking work and deal with your children.
Starting point is 00:40:35 But anyway, that's that. Yeah. Wow. That was fun. That was good. Good food. Good testing. Good game.
Starting point is 00:40:44 Appreciate it. Thanks to you guys for listening. And, um, we'll be back with another one next week and another classic normal episode of our podcast from Monday. For more of us, you can always check out our Patreon, patreon.com slash J.A. Ja. We're making videos. There's content more than you can possibly imagine.
Starting point is 00:40:59 Yeah. There's a ton of stuff on there. And the best time to sign up is the beginning of the month because they charge you every month. So you get a full month of access right now is the time. And remember, it's also going towards supporting us, making more videos. So if you want to see those, subscribe, which we also have to do this week. Okay.
Starting point is 00:41:17 That's right. Thanks for listening. Ciao. We'll be back soon. Bye. Peace.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.