IHIP News - This Group of MAGA Christian Nationalists Are Somehow NOT SATIRE

Episode Date: January 17, 2025

Trump announces "Hollywood Ambassadors" and his christian nationalist base prepares for him to take office. Pre-order our new book, join our Patreon Cult, and more by clicking here: https://linktr.ee/ivehaditpodcast. Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZ5cvDR2HhVUcdVoTvvQKLw/joinSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Welcome to IHIP News. Trump has just announced a trio of dipshits to be his Hollywood ambassadors. What's it called, Pumps? His Hollywood ambassadors, and it is Jon Voight, Mel Gibson, and Sylvester Stallone to be ambassadors to a great but very troubled place, Hollywood, California. They will serve as special envoys to me for the purpose of bringing Hollywood, which has lost much of its business over the last four years, to foreign countries back, bigger and better, stronger than before.

These three very talented people will be my eyes and ears, and I will get done what they suggest. It will be like the United States of America itself, the golden age of Hollywood. Who's going to tell him? I mean, who's going to tell Trump that nobody in Hollywood or in America, unless you're some MAGA moron, even likes those three actors. Right. Anyway. All right. I want to move on to a subject that we all need to address. And with Trump, you have such a potpourri of fuckery surrounding him. You've got the oligarchs, the broligarchs. You have, you know, the total sycophants like Marco Rubio or Ted Cruz that are like, what else can we do for you, sir? And then you have the Christian nationalists. And there is a whole right wing media echo chamber, but there's also a whole Christian nationalist echo chamber. And you guys, this shit is so

crazy. The first video I want to play for you guys is of the Texas legislature at the Texas Capitol. There are Christian worshipers and they are blessing the walls of a hearing room to protect lawmakers from spiritual forces and the Jezebel spirit. I'm not making this up. It's on video. Here it is. Our need to a spirit of fear. We pray that we would not bow to fear. We pray like Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, being willing to be thrown into a fiery furnace. We say our God is able, and even if he doesn't, he's God. We say like a Queen Esther that says, if I perish, I perish. We say like a Daniel,

I will sleep in a tent of lions. That is at the Texas state Capitol. That is on state property. And you have a bunch of religious fanatics talking about fiery hell and the Jezebel spirit and all this crazy, crazy, crazy shit. And I just want to remind everybody it's 2025. That is so alarming and disturbing. And how many people are in there that are just buying this horseshit? That's crazy. I mean, I'm worried about this Christian nationalist, radicalized, fundamentalist evangelicals.

I mean, they are every bit as malignant as the MAGA movement, I think. Well, and they are the epicenter of the MAGA movement. I mean, there's this whole, you know, there's the people who are looking to gain more financial power and less regulation so that they can dick over more of the masses. And that's evil. But then you have these people who are, they believe this shit. I mean, these people, it's like the Speaker of the House. He believes that God talks to him and tells him he's Moses. And these people are ascending to be in charge of very powerful positions in government.

Next up, we have Charlie Kirk and some religious nut named Eric Metaxas. And here's what they have to say about Trump's victory. I do believe that we're living through one of God's greatest graces upon the Republic since its founding. There's absolutely no doubt. I mean, I'm tracking 100. I've been saying the same thing. This is we're living through tremendous history this minute. And I think God gave his grace at its founding. God gave his grace in the same thing. This is, we're living through tremendous history this minute. And I think God gave us grace at its founding. God gave us grace in the Civil War.

God gave us grace in World War II. And I think that this is up there because where we were headed, it would have... Honestly, this is ahead of World War II. Okay. Think about that. Think about these two quacks, these two religious fanatic nutjobs saying that Trump's victory in 2024 is better than the victory of the allied forces in World War II. It's so alarming and shocking.

And here's what I want to know. Where the country was headed, does that mean equality? Is that what they're mad about, equality? Well, I think that we know what they're mad about. They're mad about women, people of color, people that might not be of heterosexual orientation having the same as white men. And I guess maybe regulating corporations and making sure that we live in a more just place. But also, I think a lot of these people are fearful that they see what everybody else is seeing right now. And religion is shrinking in the United States of America. And that scares the shit out of these people because that's how they are able to control the masses is they take a portion of the American public that has been indoctrinated to believe in this type of black and white thinking, this type of worldview.

And they're prime to manipulate to get to vote for Republicans. And most of the time they're voting against their own self-interest. And so I think, you know, they're probably talking about a lot of those things. I mean, these are the people that are all wound up and that talk incessantly about trans people more than trans people talk about trans people. Right. I mean, less than one percent of the population, they're wound up about it all the time. It's just gross. And I mean, Charlie Kirk is a bozo. Anybody that would go on his podcast is a bozo. He and Don Jr. are palling around.

I rest my case. It's just a clown car of stupid. And here's just something to point out that all of these hardcore Bible thumpers, okay, these are the people that were so upset about Bill Clinton. But yes, they, their David, their guy is Donald Trump. So the hypocrisy is always on full display. Here is a right wing podcaster and he's talking about how Trump's failed assassination attempt is converting really famous atheists to Christianity. And you guys have got to hear this.

I've spoken with very powerful, very prestigious, world famous atheists and agnostics who have told me that in their personal conversations with President Trump, Trump is witnessing to them because of this. They never spoke with Trump about God. These are billionaires and multimillionaires. These are world famous people who are regularly on national television. And they're saying that Trump is using this assassination attempt to radically witness to them about his faith in God. And it is moving people towards saying there is no God to there must be a God,

because we personally watched a miracle. There he is. He's a walking, talking advertisement, witnessing the power of Christianity. And he is converting all of these billionaire atheists that he talks to all the time. This guy. Non-stop. I mean, they're in constant communication. Benny Johnson is this guy, and he's a huge dipshit. I can't believe that you can sit there and say that and not think that people think that's satire, that Donald Trump is witnessing to people and converting. Who did he convert? Richard Dawkins?

Seriously doubt it. Sam Harris? Seriously doubt it. Who'd you talk to? Elon Musk? Maybe on a ketamine bender. He's like, oh, fuck. Yeah.

Yeah. I'm all in. I don't believe I would give you my right arm if Trump is running around trying to witness to people. I mean, that is a lie. That is a lie. And my question is, did he make it up? Did somebody tell him that?

Because that never happened. Like, as sure as I know anything on this planet, that is not happening. Trump has said that he believes it's a miracle that the bullet. No, I've heard him say that. But what he's suggesting is that Trump is trying to convert nonbelievers to being believers after they all wore maxi pads on their ear at the RNC. And I want to remind the listener, this is the exact same RNC where Grindr crashed twice. Two times. Two times.

So we had the crash of Grindr. So that's fucking crazy. And then closing out the crazy, the potpourri of fuckery that we have for today, this Christian nationalism cancer that is penetrating through the United States is a Trump prophetess. She's a female prophet. So she refers to herself as a prophetess. Those are her words, not mine. And she's constantly in communication with Trump and the Trump family. And y'all have got to get wind of this.

I'm continually in contact with Trump or with Laura, with Don. They don't care if I mention their name. Let me tell you, they mention me all the time to the rest of the people running. Anybody running that Trump has endorsed, he gives them my name. And I don't mind saying it because let me tell you, I have 57,000 texts to prove it. I have 57,000 now. And this is the best part. I don't mind giving, you know, God's word to them or praying for them. And they know I pray for them. So she's in constant, this makes sense to me. She's constantly in communication with Donald Trump, Lara Trump, Eric Trump, Don Jr. Communicating, she's a vessel telling those dipshits what God is telling them. And she sent out 57,000 texts to prove it. Out of all the crazy shit that the Trump family says, if this were their advisor via 57,000 texts, I'm like, oh, that checks out. It wouldn't surprise me in the least. That checks

out. I get that. But he's, none of them are taking advice from her. I did think of one caveat that Trump would be pushing Christianity to sell his fucking Bible. So he might give him a little slip, but he could give two fucks about Christianity. I mean, he could not care less. He wants to grift off his patriotic Bible or God bless America Bible, now his inauguration Bible. He doesn't give a fuck. These people are ridiculous. And if she's so close with Lara Trump, why does she call her Laura? So that's a great point. But I also want to point out that of all of the Western countries, Western democracies,

the United States is the most religious. And we're the one, the country that is in the most precarious situation as far as stability goes. And I believe having a front row seat to a state, living in a MAGA state, the buckle of the Bible belt, we are a low wage state. We are a bottom 10 state. We are one of the poorest states. These policies, these Christian nationalist policies, they are trying out in all of these poorest states. These policies, these Christian nationalist policies, they are trying out in all of these red states. They make people poor, dumber, and less safe. And so when you look at other countries, they're more stable because they don't have religion integrated into their

government. We are seeing the demolition of the separation of church and state. And it is so horrific. And you can look no further than to the bottom 10 states in the United States of America, Mississippi, Oklahoma, Alabama, Louisiana, West Virginia. Look at the super majorities that they have. Look at how maggot they are. Look at how Christian they are. And then look at God's blessings rain down on them. And they are the last ranked states in the country. Lowest wages, lower life expectancy. These are poor states.

These are states that do not give a shit about kids once they're born. That's right. And so this whole Christian Nationals thing, I don't think Trump gives a shit about Christianity, but he knows that they are a useful idiot for him. wanted to share all of the crazy that goes on on the Christian media right wing echo chamber, because there is tweet after tweet after tweet after tweet of this crazy bullshit all over. It's one thing that I think it's super important to point out. And we pointed out all the time, the reddest, most religious states are at the bottom 10. And Christianity, the way they're selling it is a bunch of bullshit grifting, and they value money over people every fucking time. And their churches do too. If you look at the churches in Oklahoma,

in Texas, Louisiana, Mississippi, Alabama, all of the poor religious states. The churches are set up exactly the way Donald Trump wants to set up the government, which is no accountability, grift, grift, grift, and keep recruit, recruit, recruit more people, blind obedience. The megachurch footprint, the business model of a megachurch is exactly what Donald Trump wants to do with the United States federal government. That's exactly what he is doing. Yep. All right. We'll see you guys later. Also, we're fucked.