Inside Conan: An Important Hollywood Podcast - Inside Conan Greenland

Episode Date: September 6, 2019

Conan writer Jose Arroyo and Conan Field Producer Jason Chillemi join Conan writers Mike Sweeney and Jessie Gaskell to discuss the behind the scenes of their recent Conan trip to Greenland. Plus, Mike and Jessie talk to Jackie, a Conan fan with an Inside Conan tattoo.This episode is brought to you by Vital Farms (www.vitalfarms.com/coupon).Check out Conan Without Borders: Greenland: https://teamcoco.com/greenlandCheck out Conan25: The Remotes: https://conan25.teamcoco.com/Got a question for Inside Conan? Call our voicemail: [phone] and e-mail us at [e-mail] For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com

And now, it's time for Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast. Hi, I'm Mike Sweeney. I'm Jessie Gaskell. Welcome to the podcast. Thank you for listening. Yes, we have just finished wrapping the Greenland show up. Yes. And it aired Tuesday. It aired on Tuesday. I hope you liked it. Yes, I hope everyone liked it. It was a lot of work. It was a fair amount of work. And we thought today we'd talk to some of

the team who went to Greenland and talk. We think we think it's interesting to see how it came about. Yeah, because it was all like it was about a week from start to finish. Yes, it was a lightning attack. Yeah. And many people mobilized quickly. And once everyone was mobilized, it was nonstop till the show was screened for a live audience. Literally, the finishing touches put on 15 minutes before the screening. So it was that whiz bang.

And we're going to get into all that. But first, we found somebody, a fan of Conan and of Inside Conan, was at the screening. And she has a tattoo on her forearm with the inside Conan art. Right. So we. This was stunning. We talked to her as an intervention, even though it was too late. I do think there are ways to have those removed.

So we thought it was important to talk to her. I don't know. I actually think this is sort of a gauntlet for our other fans. It's true. Where's your tattoos? to her. I don't know. I actually think this is sort of a gauntlet for our other fans. It's true. Where's your tattoos? And hers, I think. Mom. I think we're posting the picture of her tattoo.

I think others, yes, should answer the call. Yes. And bigger. And on the face, maybe. A face. It should actually map their face in scale. So half their face is a skull. Conan's face laid over your face.

Yes, I like it. Good. So here she is. We're here with Jackie. Hi, Jackie. Hello. Thank you for being here. We literally just, Jesse just grabbed you out of the dark audience.

Yeah, we're about to do the Greenland show screening. And we had to grab you because you have an inside Conan tattoo. I do. Yes. Oh, my God. It's beautiful. Can we see it right now? Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wow. It's on your forearm. Yes. Hard to hide. I assumed you would have hidden it somewhere. It's pretty great. It looks awesome. I got to get a little touch up with the colors.

But besides that, it's it. And it's a mini anatomy lesson on the skull. It looks awesome. I got to get a little touch up with the colors, but besides that, it's it. And it's a mini anatomy lesson on the skull. It is. That's amazing. And then Conan's autograph, too. Wow. Did he actually sign your arm? Yes.

That was back in November during the tour in Detroit. In Detroit. So you went to the show in Detroit. Yes. That was a great theater. It was, yes. And he signed it. How long after did you get that tattoo? The next day. Oh, yeah, that was a great theater. It was, yes. And he signed it and how long after

did you get that tattoo? The next day. Oh yeah, because you can't shower until you get the tattoo. Not at all. You can't go out in the rain. You can't do anything

until that tattoo's, wow. Do people ask, I mean, what do people think of this? They like it, honestly. Even if they don't

recognize right away that it's Conan, they're like, that's badass. They think it's a really cool tattoo. I thought you were going to say you've been ostracized by everyone, disowned by your family. Yeah, my family disowned me. We're your family now.

Yes. Good. Yeah, if you ever need anything, Jessie is available. And you mentioned earlier, you said you were stationed somewhere and then you went to, so you were in the armed services. Yes, I'm in the Air Force, actually. Oh, awesome. Oh, wow, that's that's great wow and where are you based now right now i'm in ohio okay yeah and where'd you go did you grow up in the military or no um no no so where did you decide to join i actually am from ohio but i was around all over the place for 12 years and i just

got stationed back in ohio oh that's is that good thing? Where you're like, oh, I wanted to get out of Ohio. I'm ready to see the world. Yeah, exactly. I want to see the world. So I'm ready to go again. I'm afraid to ask this. Do you have other tattoos? No, this is it.

Are you serious? Holy cow. I assumed that you were going to have a full set. Like all sweet American fun. Like a Bill Maher tattoo. This is such an honor. But wow, that's amazing. Can I ask, what does a Conan tattoo get you in the military?

Like, do you get extra mashed potatoes? I don't know yet. Respect? Yeah, I might get a little extra respect, you know, some kudos from some of the younger people who actually, you know, follow Conan and stuff. Oh, that's great. Oh, cool. And you must be making a lot of moolah in the military

because you're flying all over. Oh, I was in Detroit. Oh, I saw the show in Minneapolis, and now you're in L.A. Yeah. Well, maybe you're doing the flying because you're in the Air Force, right? Yeah. Everyone thinks that. It's Fleet Week. I know you're in the Air Force, right? Yeah. Everyone thinks that. It's Fleet Week.

I know you're in the Air Force. Does the Air Force, is that why you happen to be? No. No. I was strictly for the show. Oh, awesome. I saw it like pop up and I was like, wait, Greenland isn't Ghana first? Oh.

Yeah. You're not the first person to bring that up. we will have to address that no but i hopped right on it and i was like let's see if i get a ticket we were awesome editing ghana and then this greenland story came up yeah we were almost done basically and we're like should we try to do it we'd have to turn shoot it and edit it in a week which we've never done before yeah quickly and we said oh yeah let's do it. So Ghana soon. Ghana will, yeah. But this was so topical.

I know. We just were like, oh, let's go. So as long as Trump doesn't try to buy any other countries, Ghana will be the next show. And if he tries to buy Ghana, then it's really, it'll be super topical. Yeah. Yeah. But you, so how long are you stationed in Ohio? I don't know, actually.

Oh, you just wait until you get an assignment. Yeah, whenever they tell me to leave. Yeah. Get out. Wow, what a life. Man. Or wherever Conan goes next.

Oh, yeah, for sure. No, actually, crazy story. I was stationed in Korea when he came the week before I left. Really? So I got to see him there.

Oh, that's awesome. At the 100-person meet-and-greet thing. Oh, no. But it wasn't really a meet-and-greet. It but it wasn't really a meet and greet it was just everybody asking for a selfie

and then he had to like we in that office building where you go up you know all of our worst secrets you do because I think

I think that kind of got we were just told it was a meet and greet it got advertised as something else like it was a show going to be a big show or something

and we didn't have any material prepared and it was like the nightmares that I still have where you're suddenly. That was scary. We had an octopus. Yeah. Yes.

And a Jordan cutout. And that was basically it. That was it. And we danced. And the snacks. Yeah, yeah. Oh, boy. And we stretched to fill 45 minutes with that.

Oh, man. I know. I'm so sorry. We've been through so much. Wow. Todd, this is worse, harder than military service. Being a fan of the show. Yeah.

And then after that, I went to Germany, actually. I got stationed there. Yeah. And then we went to Berlin. Germany, yeah. Oh, wow. I actually went up to Berlin, but I couldn't find anybody. I only had three days.

Well, now you have my Instagram. There you go. I'll always know where you're going. Tell us where you're going next. I'm actually deploying. I can't really say where, but that was something us where you're going next. I'm actually deploying. I can't really say where, but that was something that I brought up.

Yeah. I don't know if it's a possibility, but maybe we could. I mean, chances are good. Oh, she mentioned. She didn't give me any specifics. Yeah.

Okay. Well, well, yeah, you're going to have to reach out. I know, because that will determine where we go next spring.

Absolutely. We have to wrap this up. Yeah, we do. Because we're about to screen the show and you have to get back in the audience and to have to reach out. I know, because that will determine where we go next spring, I think. Absolutely. We have to wrap this up. Yeah, we do. Because we're about to screen the show. And you have to get back in the audience. And we have to go run down and introduce Conan. And then we're going to screen. Yeah, but we hope you love it.

Oh, I will. And thank you for being here. Of course. Thank you for having me. And we love the tattoo. Awesome. Thank you. Thanks, Jackie.

Well, she was cool. Yeah, she was really cool. Yeah, and stationed in Ohio. I know. It's surprisingly normal for somebody with a Conan tattoo. Yes, that's right. And we're including Conan. I'll give that qualifier.

Yeah. Well, let's talk about Greenland. Let's get into it. Yes. We're here with two of the travel team. Yes. The four of us have been on all the travel shows. Yeah.

And since the beginning. And it's Jose Arroyo, one of the writers on the show. He's a friend of the pod. Yes. And Jason Chalemi, the producer of all the travel shows. Yeah. Hi, guys. Thanks for having us.

Yeah. I've seen it all yeah yeah yeah yeah you have you have but uh today we just thought we'd talk about this show because of um haiti we we did a show that was topical uh in haiti after trump insulted that entire country and we zipped down there and turned that show around in a little under two weeks and we decided we'd beat that record yeah we could cut that faster we could cut a week off right and so uh yeah so let's talk about the process i think you guys were all in those meetings we were kind of circling around where to go next yes that's true

um because we've been finishing up our gh show, which is still going to air. I need to clarify because people have been asking me about that. Me too. Ghana is still going to air in November. Yes. Early November. Yes. And we shot so much great stuff in Ghana.

We're still putting it together. It's such a good show. We're not ashamed of the Ghana show. We love it. But we were actually in the middle of editing Ghana when the Trump story of, hey, let's buy Greenland came up. And then the next day, our executive producer, Jeff Ross, was like, hey, did you mention Greenland? Yeah.

Well, because we were in a meeting, and Chalemi, you had actually mentioned Greenland. Yes. What made you think of Greenland before that? It just seems like no one ever goes there. mention yeah well because we were in a meeting and chilemi you had actually mentioned greenland yes what made you think of greenland before that it just seems like no one ever goes there i mean kind of a lot of the same joke like you can probably do a lot of things you do in iceland but no one goes in greenland but no one goes to greenland so i like going places that we've no one would go to yeah so earlier earlier in the week on monday we had our first like oh where are we going to go next we had the meeting and iceland was in the forefront on Monday, we had our first, like, oh, where are we going to go next? We had the meeting.

And Iceland was in the forefront. It was one of the frontrunners. And that's when Shalemi, as you just said, we're like, hey, why not that giant island next to Iceland, Greenland? And, you know, I love that you pitched Greenland on a Monday. And then Thursday, this story broke. And then it was like, oh yeah, let's do Chalemi's idea. Definitely. It worked out great

with a little help from the president. And Jose, you had mentioned I think as a negative that Jordan is also really into Iceland. So we were worried about that we were going to have to do Conan and Conan in Iceland he is a fan of Iceland I know that

and it's also very touristy Iceland it's been it's been discovered and everything so people go there

yeah a lot but Greenland is sort of not on anybody's first travel agenda and or second or third or second or third

it only has what 57,000 people in a On anybody's first travel agenda and- Or second or third. Or second or third. It only has, what, 57,000 people in it. Yeah. And three times bigger than Texas. Yes. You're quoting from the show. Oh, yes. And the show's quoting from Wikipedia. That's where most of our show comes from.

But so, yeah, so, I mean, once we decided, we kind of all met on Monday. Right. After a weekend of the story had kind of been percolating in the news. And there was that whole weekend, Jeff Ross and Shalemi were researching. Were you putting out feelers? Well, researching how to get there. Flights. Yeah.

It's really hard to get there. Right. And here's the other thing. Sure. Okay. Trump wants to buy Greenland. Okay. It's really hard to get there. Right. And here's the other thing. Sure. Okay. Trump wants to buy Greenland. Okay. Let's go there.

But, of course, with the news cycles now, like especially a Trump story, by Sunday, Greenland could be so far in the rearview mirror because of 8 million other things. He's launched nuclear war. Exactly. Yeah. On a hurricane. So, we're trying to, you know, you don't want to get, do all this work and then say, here's the show. And they're like, that was 48 hours ago. Get out. So, we were monitoring that.

Meanwhile, yes, Chalemi and Jeff Ross looking into travel. And whoever thought about how to get to Greenland, we're about to tell you how hard it is to get there. It's really hard. You either go through Iceland or Copenhagen. Right. But like there's only one flight a day from Copenhagen in the morning at 9 a.m. Every other day out of Iceland, like it'd be really hard to get there.

Right. With a camera crew. Wow. Very last minute. And from LA. From LA especially. So you might have three planes. Right. We'd have to fly over flight by many hours to get to with a camera crew very last minute and from LA from LA especially so you might have three planes

right we'd have to fly overflight by many hours to get to Copenhagen and then wait for this one flight go back yeah

crazy and you figured it out right well we had the only way to do it was we had to charter

a plane yes to fly us directly and and we had to charter a plane to fly us directly. And we had to limit the number. We usually take more people. There was a weight limit. I mean, it's literally like you can't take above a certain. We couldn't bring our normal gear.

We couldn't bring our normal gear. And we couldn't bring one of our cameramen and our sound guy. And normally 11 of us go. Yes. And so we just decided, decided okay let's hire a camera crew in greenland which we never do and uh we found a crew there and that they came became part of the story a little well that was another thing also like normally when we decide to go to a place i start looking to that country and there's a whole list of fixers that we can hire.

Right. And can you explain what a fixer is? A fixer is a local person on the ground from that country who would help us with, like, permitting, locations, logistics of vehicles. Right. Covering up murders. Yeah. Right.

And they usually have a lot of television. They're fixers. They mostly do television. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Because a lot of countries go to a lot of television they're fixers they mostly do television yeah because a lot of countries go

a lot of shows foreign shows like Survivor or Amazing Race Amazing Race exactly or the Kardashians so when I tried to look

in Greenland no one came up like it was this does not happen in Greenland the Kardashians have never been to Greenland apparently we went

one place we went to yay finally so I just happened to contact like Film Greenland like like their version of Film LA. And they posted it on a message board. And this one guy's like, I think I can try that. The message board is just one guy. And he works at a TV station there, K&R.

Right. What does he do there? That's a great question. We never even found out. Yeah, we don't even know. So he basically, he responded. He responded and said, I will help. I will help you. Yeah.

His name is Rasmus. He had never done this before. His name is Rasmus Peterson. He had never done this before. And he's just, I'll give this a whirl. And he made it happen. He killed it. Yeah.

I mean, I said we were coming for like two days. And we want to do this, this, and this. And he made it happen. And his wife, Vivi, wound up being our translator. Yes, yes. So it was kind of a small group. I found out, I talked to some of the camera people who were from Iceland. And a lot of their film work is mostly in documentaries.

So they don't have like a feature film base or anything like that. But they were ready to do anything for us and yeah and people know each other i mean it's it's sort of a joke about small towns but they really legitimately did know like somebody on the crew always knew somebody who had the thing we needed yes like we need to go out on a boat it was like oh i know somebody with a boat yeah right right right and uh they're probably just happy not to do a story about global warming. That's probably a small cottage industry. But,

uh, yeah. And, and Rasmus and his wife in, we were like, Oh, you know, we'd like to try the local cuisine.

They put together, they're like, we'll host you. And they, and Rasmus's father put together this whole uh giant feast of uh stuff that i didn't i never thought about right like a whale skin i did not know was something you ate yeah seal blubber which was around four inches thick yeah it was like yeah solid like a savory fishy jello yes it was like... Yeah. Solid. Like a savory, fishy jello.

Yes, it was seal lardo. And four different kinds of dried fish. Yes. I guess there was cod and something called capelin and two others that I... Were there four? Oh, there was dried seal. There was dried seal. Dried seal.

Dried seal. Dried seal meat. Dried halibut. There was dried seal meat. Oh, yeah. And the way they serve that is they cut a piece of the seal fat, a cube of that, and you put that on top of your cube of dried seal and you eat them together. For the total seal experience. It's called seal two ways.

Yes. So Rasmus, wow, he- Killed it. And now this is like something he may, I mean, I don't know how many productions are going to go there, but he's, this might be a new career for him. That would be amazing. They had so much fun. Oh, good. I always wonder if we are sort of leaving a trail

of destruction. I literally have like a friend for life now. Like he's like, oh, yeah, he's. Yeah. You know, I think, yeah, I only get a partial sense of the story because you are, you, Jason, are so, become so close to everyone we work with on the ground. Like when we say goodbye, I'm always like, hey, yeah, thank you.

You know, quick hug. And then you are, it's like the end of the Wizard of Oz. They're like, I'm going to miss you most of all. And I was like, wow, they have connected on a level I'm very envious of. Yeah. No, he's a good guy. And he's just so thankful. I don't know.

Everything worked out perfectly, really. Well, let's go back to the chronology of it. Because we were just talking about the flight over. Meanwhile, Trump is keeping the story alive by canceling a trip to Denmark. Yes. And turning down an invitation from their queen, I believe. Tweeting a picture, I won't do this to Greenland, and trying to be self-deprecating for the first time in his life. He called the prime minister a nasty.

Yes, she was another female nasty. Yeah. So he was on the cover of the newspapers in Greenland when we landed. Although the newspaper only comes out once a week. It's true. It's true. And we did feel like, holy cow, is he on our payroll? Right.

And on this show where whenever we're doing something topical, we're so used to something getting knocked out by another story and going, ah, it's dead. And this was one of those rare things where, oh, my God, no. The story is staying alive. And so after that weekend of planning the travel, we came in Monday. We sat. And it's like, is it a go? Is it a go? And Conan went to all of you.

He went, Jesse, what do you think? I know. Jason, what do you think? Jose, what do you think? We all said something noncommittal. went, Jesse, what do you think? I know. Jason, what do you think? Jose, what do you think? We all said something noncommittal. Right, right, right. What do you think, Conan? Pass the buck, pass the buck.

I think that you could definitely kill this one, but I also think that you've earned a rest. What do we know about this guy Rasmus, really? But then, so we did the announcement. Then it was like, okay, we're going to announce it tonight on's like then it was like okay we're gonna announce it tonight on the show that was like 11 30 a.m so then instead of figuring out what the show would be we spent all day figuring out what the announcement was going to be for the the show that night so we did that and it went pretty well and we went to bed and then we woke up

tuesday morning having announced that the next day we were going to Greenland and had not figured out any of what the show was. We moved the schedule around. Because it was supposed to be a Thursday show. And we ended up doing two shows on Wednesday. Right, just so we could get out Wednesday night. We knew when we were going. We announced it. We just didn't know what yet.

Yes. And so I remember waking up Tuesday morning like, oh, my God, what have we done? And then we just started writing jokes. And the writers pitched in all these funny jokes. And by the time we left Wednesday night, we had one suitcase full of props. Oh, it's a big suitcase. We take the world's largest suitcase that is always stuffed with props. And those are like security blankets.

It's like, just knowing, like, I think Conan loves shedding them as we go. And like, when you actually bring it out, he's like, no, no, no. But then we always have them there. Just in case. Oh, but the best thing, you have to tell us about the props that you took on the actual plane. Oh, we took on two Happy Meals. Two McDonald's Happy Meals. Because there are no,

we wanted, the whole premise of this show was Conan loves Trump's idea to buy Greenland. Conan's going to Greenland to bargain, to do the bargain and actually make the purchase happen.

So he's coming armed. So Greenland, when he's done, it will be part of America, he's bringing some of Americana with him. We brought different things to bribe them or sway them. Right. Yeah, grease the wheels. I didn't want to put two Happy Meals in the back, you know, bomb on the plane and get it smashed.

Right. So we just brought them on the plane. They were Ziploc, so there was no odor. Right. But I just carried them in a small duffel. And the best thing was that you were determined to bring them back as well. Well, I do that with all the props, even things that we destroy. Right.

Clearly things they say, like, just leave it there. Don't worry about it. We can get that anywhere. Right. I always end up bringing them back. I know it makes them mad slash makes them happy at the same time. Our props department. John Rau and Bill Tall.

Are they always when I walked in I ended up bringing back the Happy Meals yeah so over three you know we were there for how long

three days two flights back and forth yeah I walked in with the Happy Meals and they were just like what are you doing they ended up being smashed they were all

what are you doing yes since we're talking about props but they tasted just as good yeah right they slayed them yeah aged beef. What are you doing? Yes. Since we're talking about props, should we- But they tasted just as good. Yeah. Right, they salated them. Yeah.

Should we talk about the end of the Greenland show and the prop now? Or it's a little, we're jumping to- Oh, yeah, I guess let's keep going. Okay, good. We'll save that.

Yeah. So there we were. So we threw things together. And then Wednesday night, we took off. And we- We went on an overnight flight. I was going to say, we rarely do red eye right into working. But for this one, we kind of had to.

We had to. We landed on Thursday morning. And I don't know how you told the Iceland crew, when we start rolling, we don't stop for hours and hours. You always warn. Yeah, there is some sort of warning. And again, they were really, really excited for this experience. So they were like,

whatever you say, we're on board. Yeah. And so we had to, because we're in a jet, we had to land at one specific airport that had a long enough runway. Greenland is all rock. So, you know,

most of the runways are short. There are no roads connecting any of the cities. You have to fly to every city. You have to fly or take a boat to every city. But there's only one city.

You have to come into Kangaloosak for customs. Like any international flights have to land through just one city. Oh, right. So we had to land there. Except they didn't

stamp our passport. No, I know. Life sucks. And then we had to get on another propeller plane and fly to the capital which was Nuke. And then the second we got out there

start shooting on the tarmac. Like literally get the camera crew out there. Here comes Conan off the plane. They filmed our landing. They started before we even landed. It was raining. It was cold. That's unusual, too. It's been a while since it's like, okay, you've got to start shooting the second you touch down.

What was the last one? Korea, maybe? Did we do it after Korea? I know Korea we had it because it was a whole mob of people. Right. But even then, then we got in the car and it was like, okay, we're going to go to the hotel and relax. Yeah, take a bath. Yeah.

This one was so short we decided to kind of do it in when we could documentary style so we shot conan we put a cameraman seth our cameraman seth in the back seat and shot conan driving from the airport with vivi our translator and hostess to the hotel and because it was like we are barely going to have time to shoot enough stuff to make an hour show. So we've got to shoot every, like the making of it.

We shot Conan taking a nap. That's right. It was really funny. And we're willing to share that video. At the screening, it's funny because I, you know, I wasn't in that car.

Oh, yeah, yeah. Throughout the couple of days, like I knew we got funny stuff, but I didn't even know that existed. Ah, yeah. So there's a lot, you know, it was know that existed. Ah, yeah. So it was cool. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Conan's conversations with Vivi are some of the highlights of the show. They really are. They had a good dynamic. Yeah, she was really funny. It's funny that we end up finding good improv partners for Conan in every country in the world just by accident. Everyone's just herself. Just being herself was enough of a force.

I was going to say, everyone's so just herself just being herself was enough of a force I was gonna say everyone is so natural yeah and which is the perfect way to play off of Conan because he's you know

we've been really lucky yeah and so their their normal reaction is always like the funniest thing you could hope for right

and yeah and then drove to a hotel checked in we shot him checking in like just shoot shoot yeah and then it was man on, checked in. We shot him checking in, like just shoot, shoot. Yeah. And then it was man on the street, a person on the street. All day, yeah.

All day. And then. Yeah, and then we, oh, we went to their house for dinner. That was. Was that the first night? That was the first night. Oh, man. And that was really cool to see just how, you know, someone's regular house.

Yes. With a gorgeous ocean view yeah yeah yeah oh and their whole family was there and wasn't sunset the golden hour as they call it yes lasted two hours oh yeah because it's light at this time of year it's light for like 16 hours a day it was beautiful which really helped us in filming yes yes it did stay out even longer it's sort of the ideal location for film it's true right yeah and then we're all and then that night

oh we had Conan talked about this at the screening but we went to a Thai restaurant right because it was really they it was like

recommended to us as this is one of the best restaurants is this Thai food right yeah it was also two doors down

it was two doors down from the hotel everything is very close everything was two doors down yeah but we got something called Greenlandic It was also two doors down from the hotel. It was two doors down from the hotel. Everything is very close. Everything was two doors down. Yeah. True. But we got something called Greenlandic coffee there,

which is really just like a whiskey and coffee. But then they serve it to you with this sort of fire show. It's a lot of fanfare. It's a lot of fanfare. And we ordered. It took 40 minutes. We got nine of them, right? Yeah, we ordered nine of them. And so then

the poor guy was like alright he's gotta do the same show for each one yes and it took

a really long time we were both it was like I had that feeling of when you wanna like I know that

he's looking at my face and so I'm trying to keep up the enthusiasm the whole time politely enthusiastic and keep clapping

but occasionally it's exhausting it was exhausting. And keep clapping, but it's exhausting. It was exhausting. By the ninth one. Drink three. It's like singing happy birthday six times, seven times. Over and over. So if you go to that restaurant in Nuuk, don't order this. But then we all just had like a sip.

We just share one. We just had one sip each. It was nighttime and we don't want coffee. I know. And that was probably a mistake that I had some, because I did not sleep that night, even though I hadn't slept the night before. A long time in the pool.

Yeah. And then we did one thing different. We brought an editor with us who just plowed through that. Matt Shaw. Matt Shaw. And that was our head editor, Rob Ash's idea. And it was a great idea because without him there, the show wouldn't have been edited.

Well, we were able to pop cards during the day and just get it right. He began the process immediately. Right. Like all our video cameras have like little cards. And then day two, we basically had two. We were barely there more than 48 hours. Yeah. So the next day, we just shot all day.

Is that our media day? Yes. Oh, yeah. We sat with somebody from KNR and did a very long, very funny interview. I think we actually captured the highlights in the show. Yes. That's one of my favorite things. Well, it's one of my favorite things on the show, that segment, because it's taking Conan.

Yeah, we didn't know the interview was going to be quite as long as it was. It went on and on. And it went to some weird places. And she started, the reporters just started, she goes, okay, now we're going to play games. Right, right. And Conan was, we were, it was so tired and loopy. She was like the James Lipton of Greenland. Yeah, that's right. Conan's like, yes, right, we're going to play games. and Conan was we were it was so tired and loopy she was like the James Lipton of Greenland

Conan was like yes right we're gonna play games and then I don't know they just started doing these nonsensical call and respond I

no one knew what was happening the interview was on two folding chairs right at the edge of a drop off right and and it went on forever

and it was cold yes Conan doesn't wasn't wearing a jacket and stuff. So, he kind of endured an Icelandic, Greenlandic interview. Right. And then something happened after that, that in a way, it was kind of a little result of the preparation we did. We wrote a greeting for Conan to say in Greenlandic when we landed.

And we had the cue cards and the Greenlandic language, the words are so long and so vowel heavy. They're funny. They're just funny to see. Apparently Greenlandic has the longest word in any language. Wow.

Oh, really? Yeah, it's like multiple lines long. Wow. Just one word. Yeah. Yeah, no, the language is just crazy. And we ended up not shooting the greeting, and we're like, well, let's grab the greeting in town,

because the idea was you hear Conan doing this greeting and butchering the language, and then I think, Jesse, it was your idea. At one point, we would cut to the cue card, and that would really get a big laugh when you see the words he's trying to actually read. So then after that long interview, they asked him to do the weather,

or I think we had pitched him doing it. We pitched him doing the weather, and they were like, well, sure, yeah. So it was going to be him with the other weather person, and she'd go, and then he'd go. And we were kind of broaching it, and it was getting a little like. And then we were thinking of things to improvise. Right, right.

And then I forget who. Conan, I think. Conan. It was Conan. It was just like, oh, let me do it. Try to do it in their language. And then we're like, oh, yes, we'll do the reverse shot, basically Jesse's idea, but even funnier on a prompter.

Oh, and then it was moving. And it was moving, and he's trying to keep up with it. And it ended up being one of the funniest things on the show. Yes, yeah. But that's an example of. And that really aired in Greenland. Yes, it did. It did.

But that's an example of going to shoot something with an idea. Right, right. And you end up repurposing it. I don't know. I thought it was interesting. Yeah, no, it is. And I still brought the gay cards home. Yeah, they seemed pretty gay.

I mean, they seemed willing to air whatever we gave them. They were, they're hungry for content on Greenland Tulip. I love that. Their control room cracking up. Like, it was so funny. Yeah, it's very funny. Really funny. Yeah, but it's also, I mean, I'm always struck by whenever you meet other, like, even our crew, the camera guys and the audio guy that were working for us there, they could have been crew people here.

Yeah. You know, everyone. Yes. Like, they've got cool haircuts and cool tattoos and, you know, they were all black. And it's like, oh, that's just a guy that you'd meet in LA who does audio somewhere. Right, right, right. But those, they live in this remote part of the world that you have no contact with. Right. It is weird.

It's a weird artificial bonding, but that quickly becomes real bonding that we're all thrown together to make this one thing. And maybe I shouldn't talk about team bonding. Why? No, I just I just I just like that sounded convoluted to me I'm just being self-conscious I'm sorry

bonding though one thing Jason always does a really good job of is you like go out with the crew like you'll go to the bar with the crew

we didn't yeah well this time we did it we all went to the bar is called Daddy's yeah right Daddy's yeah

their brewery so we went to Daddy's alright was's. They're so short. Yeah. Right, Daddy's. Yeah. Their brewery. So we went to Daddy's. All right. It was fun. Yeah, it was fun. Yeah. So you get more intel on everyone we meet along the way than maybe the rest of us. Oh, yeah.

You'll tell us that people are married that I didn't realize were married and stuff like that. Right. Wait, who? Where was the country where someone was married that I didn't? That was me, Jess. Or they were a couple that I didn't realize they were a couple. No, I got to think. Do you know what I'm talking about?

I vaguely remember. Okay. Oh, the other thing. It's going to come to me. At Daddy's, I actually met the mother of one of our crew guys. She just came up to me at the bar and just started speaking in English, which almost everybody that we met had English. The mother of who?

One of the PAs, one of the people. And she goes, yeah, he worked for Conan for two days or something. Oh, nice. Yeah, yeah. And everybody was really friendly. A couple of our PAs were father and daughter. Yeah, yeah. Oh, that's right, Klaus.

Klaus Sinaka. Do you know why he had to leave? He had to run a 20,000-meter race the next day or something. Really? Oh, yeah, he was doing an ultra marathon. Everybody is really active and outdoorsy. Yes. At the dinner, I think it was Vivi who told me that there was somebody who climbs up the mountain.

Right. Like three or four times a day or something. I mean, that sounds neurotic. Well, even Rasmus. I mean, Rasmus hurt his knee on the mountain. Right. Like three or four times a day or something. I mean, that sounds neurotic. Well, even Rasmus. I mean, Rasmus hurt his knee on a mountain, and then he had to crawl down. Like he literally, he crawled down. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

They're tough people. They're tough. They are tough. Wait, what makes an ultra marathon different than a marathon? It's longer. Oh, it's longer, okay. Yeah, it's over 26. Gotcha.

But it could be 27 miles, it's an ultra-grand John. Oh, that's showing off. Extra credit. And we met that one guy who we called the Viking who was like, I walked 120 kilometers over three days to another town. And Cohen's like, why'd you do that? To see if I could. He's like, all right, okay.

It is a good way to catch up on your podcast. Walk 120 kilometers I was just going to say everyone there hunts too which is I mean culturally really interesting

that it's like you know you get a permit and you get a certain number of deer you're allowed reindeer that you're allowed

to kill on the permit and that like then you meet your quota and that's it and then you're done but it's not for sport like they're oh yeah it's all to eat and they share it it's like you know we share the meat with our neighbors it's how we all do it it's kind of survival in a way and and then

also there's a quota for for whale and narwhal uh and I'm assuming for seals as well. Walrus, everything. Although maybe seals are like squirrels to them. It's just like, ah, you can bag as many seals as you want. It's not a big deal. They're pests. But yeah, most of the country is above the Arctic Circle. Like you said, it's almost entirely a giant rock.

So it's water, ice, and rock. Right. What do you grow? No soil. There's a strip, I guess, in the southern part of Greenland that actually can sustain a little farming. Some lichen and moss. And ground blueberries. Those are their vegetables.

Oh, right. Vivi showed me and said, pick some. Yeah. Yeah, once you started looking at the ground, there actually was a lot of variety. Yeah. Right. But you do see why, I mean, that's why you have to make seal two different ways. Right. If there's not two different ways. Right.

If there's not that many options. No. You got to have different consistencies of your seal. You want a crunchy seal and a soft seal. And there were no kids there like, you know what, I'm not going to eat seal. It's like, this is what we all eat. There's no chicken nuggets. There's nothing else.

Yeah. Unless you go to the Thai restaurant. Right. Two doors down from that. And then we decided going in. One of our biggest decisions, I can't talk on travel shows, is how many days we're going to allow ourselves to shoot. And once you lock that in, that's it.

And we said we have to turn the show around so quickly. We're only going to allow ourselves two and a half days in Greenland to shoot. So, you know, you kind of expand or compressed depending on that amount of time. So, we woke up Saturday, the day we were returning to LA and we knew we had just, well, we were flying to a Northern town where all the, the icebergs are, many of the icebergs where were many of the tourists go and our flight there was delayed. And the bottom line is we had maybe less than two hours when we hit the ground to get in a boat and go 40 minutes out to the icebergs, shoot it, get back, and make our plane.

So when we were leaving Nuuk, the capital, to go to Elulissat? Yes. What time, Jason, did we have to be on the bus to go to the airport? I think we had two hours on the boat. We had to be back by 2.10. But we had to be at the airport. We had to leave from the hotel at 7.30. No, 7.45.

We went downstairs. 7.45. So at 7.10 that morning, I decided I hadn't seen Nook enough, so I put on my jogging shorts and my running shoes. You put on shorts? Were you jogging? Oh, it was so cold. I went jogging. I had

layers on the top, and I went jogging at 7.10. I had my watch, and I thought I can get back to the hotel by 7.30, take a quick shower, be down went jogging at 7.10. I had my watch, and I thought, I can get back to the hotel by 7.30, take a quick shower, be down to the bus at 7.45. And then around 7.25, I said, well, I'm going to run down to the coast, and I'll catch, go find the hotel in the skyline. And I got lost. It was foggy.

Oh, no. And I had my phone, and I think I texted one of you guys, what time is the bus again? Because I thought it was at 7.30, and I basically made it by the skin of my teeth. I was running. I was asking people, where's the hotel? And they would give me sort of, they would point me,

and I would run in that direction, and then I would ask. Also, there's only one hotel in that hotel. The hotel, right. Where's the hotel? You didn't have to remember the name of the hotel. It's just the. But I went down to the beach thinking I could just follow the shore, but there were long spits of rock and stuff.

It was impossible. I noticed they were building sort of a boardwalk, but it ends. It's not finished. So I started going out on the boardwalk, and then it got to the end. It was like, well, I guess you just turned around. Jose kept going. I kept going. I took i took a kayak it was crazy that is exciting you made an exciting it was an adrenaline rush a little more because you don't want to be the person who holds everyone out because you will get shit about it for the rest of your life that becomes the thing you're

known for oh well you know so one time i forgot my passport one time and i will still never live that down yeah did you go all the way to the airport yeah it was when we were going to israel and i forgot the passport right and there wasn't time to go back and get it right and no one could bring it to me so i had to take a different flight right i remember that you got there and you got there that night i got there that night yeah it was i felt really bad yeah i mean and it's all fine but yes it's just the uh no and yeah just jeff ross making yes that's what it was did you remember your passport uh but you know you do that you probably only do that you only do it once yeah yep you learn your lesson yes but we got to see icebergs. Yeah, we got there. We ran on the boat. We ran out and shot.

And on the fly, Conan had this idea. It was Conan's idea that we had a for sale sign. And instead of a house, it was a picture of the entire island of Greenland. And we went to a realtor and put it up. And ha ha, Greenland's for sale. And we're going a realtor and put it up and, ha-ha, Greenland's for sale and we're going to buy it. And we decided that to end the show, Conan was going to come up, maybe a quick shot of him coming out of like a rowboat by himself, taking this for sale sign, sticking it, planting it on the shore, and putting the sold sign on it. And that would be kind of like, oh, hey, we bought Greenland.

And while we're on the boat out to Iceland, icebergs, it's like, oh, we don't have time for that. No. And then it was just like, okay, let's find a little ice flow. We can get close to. And stick the flag, the for sale sign in there with the sold sign on it. So then we had to explain to the captain. Right. Who doesn't speak english we need to find an iceberg that you can back up to right so that we can plant this right for sale sign into it and do you have a hammer yes you know everything you know everything

you've learned about seafaring rivers toward the iceberg you'll put your boat and people at risk for a prop gag So we found this little ice What do you call it? Ice flow, right? That we really liked, it seemed like the right size and we

started backing up to it This is all also like we have like 15 minutes to get to the airport We were already by our watches late backing up to it. This is all also like, we have like 15 minutes to get to the airport. Oh, yeah. We were already by our watches late to be heading back into the harbor. And it was a hard out, as they say. There was no like, oh, well, you know, we'll catch the next plane.

No. No, there's no other plane. Right. But we also didn't have an end to the show. No, we didn't. We knew that we needed to end. And we made this up on the way. And then, I know, so it was a wooden stake. Like, at one point, Conan was like, well, you know, actually for this, we should have had a metal stake.

It's like, we just decided. We weren't planning on hammering this into it. I mean, and he knew that. Of course. But he just, you know, thinking out loud. And anyway, it became the sequence of trying to get this sold for sale sign into that ice flow is the end of the show. At one point, I was telling the captain, go back.

And I think he thought I meant go back to the harbor. Yes. He started going away. No, no, no. Go back to the ice flow. No, no, no. Back up. Back up.

And then we all had, he literally was doing it like a dad driving, backing out of a driveway over his shoulder. Yeah. And we were all, we realized we were like, we're all blocking his view. And we all did that. Nobody down. Yeah. And we quickly realized that the stake is not going into ice. Right.

Because I was standing next to Conan. We were just cracking up crying. And we had only taped the sign to the wooden stake. With like glue dots. So it immediately fell apart. Right. Then it started getting wet. And it was like the wet sign to a wooden stake. Like glue dots. So it immediately fell apart. Then it started getting wet. And it was like the wet was dissolving the glue. And you have to watch the show to see what happens.

You do. Is that how you're doing it? Conan got really into it. Because the fun thing, too, was once he was on board, he was like, no, we're going to get this shot. And his fingers were freezing because he kept sticking them in the ice cold water. We've got to keep retrieving the sign. Yeah. He's as maniacal as anyone in terms of just when he likes an idea and there are all these obstacles in the way, he will work harder than anyone to get it done.

Yes, he'll find a way. Yeah. Now, if he doesn't like the idea. But he was, we were all so, it just became a mission. It was a mission. Oh, yeah. And, you know, objectively, you could go, oh, like if you were 100 yards from there watching, you'd go, oh, my God, that's a boat of, it's a ship of fools, you know? But within that, it was like, oh, this has to be done.

Oh, and we also knew that we had to back up one last time to retrieve the sign. Right. Because if we left our comedy prop on an ice floe. Americans besmirching. The dickiest. Oh, my God. Yeah. And we brought it home.

We have it. That's addressed as well in the show. And we literally just made it back and got home. Oh, so then that's like just, oh, okay, you're done. And well, you're done shooting. But then Saturday night we got home and then Sunday morning we had to edit the show. Oh, we came in. Yes.

I think I woke up at five that morning. Yeah. Because I was just so off. Yeah, so off. And then by the time we came into work, I was ready for bed. Right. So then we had to start. We edited all day.

I mean, then we've been doing like 13-hour days since then. Right, and finished it, as we mentioned, 15 minutes before. The crowd was there the warm up comic was on and you know it's like okay

we're done and we were sending it yeah they're always exporting it and you're watching the little export progress bar

the little bar yeah and you know it it always it always gets done somehow so it was done we were editing

while we were also shooting the regular TBS show. So one of the, we have Rob Ash and Chris Heller and Matt Shaw. And one or two had to be pulled away. Yeah, one of them had to be pulled away to do the actual linear show. Right, because after we tape every night,

the editors actually, because we go long, especially the half hour show, we often shoot an extra 10 or 15 minutes. And then a producer, or if it's comedy that needs to have fixes, they're all in with the editors for an hour or an hour and a half to get the show ready down to time and then send it out for that night's broadcast. Exactly. So that's happening concurrent to us trying to put this show ready down to time and then send it out for that night's broadcast. Exactly. So that's happening concurrent to us trying to put this show together. Right. For Thursday's viewing, it was great. But we did it.

And what worries me is that now they know that we can do that. And I really don't want to ever have to do that again. Yeah, but it's very, we were very dumb. I know. Because now it'll be like well you did that in three days

why not two yeah we're tired it's fun it was a fun one yeah we it was I know and you made some

lifelong friends Jason yes do you think they'll come often the the people we meet on the production teams in other countries

come to visit I think Rasmus will do you think they'll come yeah I do really has he been to the US before think Rasmus will. Do you think they'll come? Yeah, I do. Really? Has he been to the US before? I think Kim will also. He has.

Oh, you think Kim will? Yeah. Oh, we met a guy on the street named Kim who, he's this incredible guy and he carves walrus tusks

and he's, he met his wife or proposed to his wife after she killed a musk ox. Yes. But he and Conan kind of shared a moment because they both like cool knives. I guess that's the knife thing. And Arnold Schwarzenegger impersonations.

They bonded. Oh, you know what? That didn't make it to the show was Kim did an Arnold impression and did the line, what was it? We're in the Arctic. Oh, it's the Arctic. It's the Arctic. It's the Arctic. And he goes, you know, that classic Arnold line, it's the Arctic. So we came back, we did all this

research. I was going to say, what is that from? It's not from anything. It doesn't exist. So Jose had a great idea, which was oh, let's get Arnold to do like a little iPhone video, like Conan, sorry to interrupt your stupid green intro

I never you know I never said that line I've done 54 movies right but yeah we can

we didn't get Arnold no sometimes you get your Scott your not Scott Baio the other guy Machio

sometimes you get your Ralph Machio sometimes yeah but I think talking about is as as good as him actually doing it. Yeah. I think so too. Yeah.

Maybe he'll listen to this podcast and be a little embarrassed. Arnold. He didn't get back to us in time. What were you thinking? He missed a press opportunity. Right. But yeah. So now we just have to finish the Ghana show.

Yeah, the Ghana show. Now that is, we've got a lot more footage for the Ghana show. Podcast episode. Yeah. It will be. And that show airs in November. The rundown. It's weird.

It's weird having like, not two in the can. I mean, technically two in the can. I mean, you're basically done with a lot of the Ghana. Right. Like normally we're finished one and we've got one more to do. But no, we're done. Yeah. Just the last two weeks the can. I mean, you're basically done with a lot of the Ghana. Right. Like normally we're finished one and we got one more to do. But no, we're done. Yeah. Just the last two weeks.

Yes. Yay. Yay. Well, this has been fun. I think we covered everything. Anything else you guys want to talk about? Yeah, anything else you guys remember? No.

That was a fun one. It was 48 or 60 hours. I think it was like 53 hours. 53 hours. Okay. In Greenland. Oh, but we just, one thing, Jason got an email after we got back that we had just missed the Northern Lights.

Oh, yes. Oh, right. They started early September. Literally last night, the guy sent me pictures. And we missed it by like three days. Yeah. And it's gorgeous. They sent some pictures and it's, yeah, it's otherworldly.

How do you know, like, do they have an alarm bell that goes off in town? So, you know. Get outside! Because I would have been long asleep.

Sure. Jose would be, you'd see it because you'd still be lost wandering around. I would still be fine. Yes. I know.

Well, we're all going to have to go back to Greenland to see the Northern Lights. Oh, we also just found out that the Greenland television saw the show and they loved it. And they're going to broadcast it on their television network. Yeah, that's great. Well, again, they're desperate for content.

Yeah, exactly. Right. I do feel like if you're a maker, like a YouTube creator, you should go to Greenland and you could immediately have a show. That was my next, one last question I wanted to ask was, would you guys tell people to go visit Greenland? Yes, I would. I already thought of my daughter and me kayaking among the icebergs because when we were there, we saw a few whale flukes and things like that.

And so it's just an amazing place to see. I would definitely try to get up there again. I agree. Yeah. Yeah. It was stunning. And so unmarred by humans. That's what I kept thinking.

Right, right. Exactly. Oh, wow. Yes. I can't wait for us to ruin this. Yeah. It'll be tough, though. That island has the upper hand.

Yes. It's so massive. The elements will get you. Yes. Well, thank you, Jose Arroyo and Jason Chalemi. You're welcome. That island has the upper hand. Yes. It's so massive. The elements will get you. Yes. Well, thank you, Jose Arroyo and Jason Chalemi. You're welcome. Thanks for having us. Yeah.

Thank you so much. Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast, is hosted by Mike Sweeney and me, Jesse Gaskell. Produced by Kevin Bartelt. Engineered by Will Becton. Mixed by Ryan Conner. Supervising producer is Aaron Blair. Thank you. Anderson and Chris Bannon at Earwolf. Thanks to Jimmy Vivino for our theme music and interstitials. You can rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. And of course, please subscribe and tell a friend to listen to Inside Conan on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, Stitcher, Google Podcasts, or whatever platform you like best.

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