Inside Conan: An Important Hollywood Podcast - Laurie Kilmartin

Episode Date: May 22, 2020

Conan writer Laurie Kilmartin joins Conan writers Mike Sweeney and Jessie Gaskell to talk about what it’s like doing stand-up sets all over the world using Zoom, the current writing process for Conan at Home, getting into anime with her son, and listener advice on how to dip into the comedy world. Got a question for Inside Conan? Call our voicemail: [phone] and e-mail us at [e-mail] For Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com

And now it's time for Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast. Hello, welcome to Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast, especially now that there's nothing else happening in Hollywood. My name is Mike Sweeney. I'm a writer on Conan. I'm Jesse Gaskell, also a writer on Conan. Conan at home right now. Right. We're talking about how a show, a TV show, a late night TV show is being put together when no two members of the staff can be in the same room together. It's an interesting process.

Usually we do everything within a big group hug. Yeah, exactly. Usually there's way too many people. It's like, hey, do we need all 30 of these people to make this thing happen? Right now it's all Conan by himself at home. Yes. He finally learned how to use a computer. I think he hates his home office now because it's now like the room of pain for him.

He has to go in, start up the equipment, do everything by himself. And I literally think when this all is over, he's just going to seal that room off and never go in there. Yep. Burn it to the ground. And I mean, our job our job's gotten really weird too. Cause first of all, there's no schedule. We used to have a very precise daily schedule and now it's kind of all like over the place. Conan shooting things in piecemeal and then they're being stitched together into a show. And so interviews can happen at different times, but then, uh, you know, Matt O'Brien, the head writer is still trying to figure out what the comedy is going to be for the next day's show.

And that determines Conan's introductions. And so that all has to be sorted out. And that could be recorded at any time during the day. And you said you experienced something where something you wrote, like all of a sudden you got a frantic email, like we're recording it now. There was no notice. Well, on Friday I got an email that was like, Oh, is the script ready for that sketch? Cause Conan's going to do it right now. And so I frantically finished the script and sent it off. And then Conan wasn't able to get to it, I think, cause he was recording a podcast. Uh, and then he was supposed to do it today. But then by noon, Matt hadn't even heard from him. And so we just put it off.

But then Andy's in it and Andy's like, oh, I'm taking my dog to Petco to get groomed. So now I have no idea what is happening. Petco is an essential service to groom an animal? I guess so. I'm calling the police. I i call the police on petco and andy i want them all jailed we haven't recorded it yet i don't know what's gonna happen but there's a lot of uh of hurry up and wait kind of right right right right but that's okay because there's so much else to do at home right yes no i. No, I know. I know. I'm not complaining because it's not like

I have anywhere else to be. Oh, no, I am complaining. But then, I mean, we could explain the way that we're actually shooting things. So as writers, when we write something, we log into the Zoom with Conan and andy then we have to make ourselves invisible and mute ourselves you have a little confab at the top where you can all see and hear each other and then once it's time to record you deep six yourself disappear yeah and then you're just lurking in the background yeah exactly yeah have you ever left your mic on during that by accident and no thank god oh my god that would not be good well because that happened right it did happen i i happened during an interview i think the producer jeff ross's

microphone he accidentally turned it on and then got a phone call so he was gabbing on the phone and but i don't i have for some reason i don't wait wasn't he making chili i think he was bragging about the chili oh the chili you just made. Which is so perfect because we always joke about how much Jeff Ross loves soup. Right. It's one step away from the soup. It's Mexican. A chili is a soup.

Yes, let's call it a soup. He's lucky he's talking about chili. God knows. Oh, I know. Oh, boy. But it was chili. We left it in the show, right? Yeah.

Cause it was, it was Frank Smiley, the producer, the bit of the, that interview left it in. It was just, it was. During Russell Brand interview. Yeah. I think it was like 2am in London for Russell Brand and he's. Oh wow. You know, staying up doing this interview and then this voice from outer space comes on. Anyway, we have a great show today and we thought we'd talk to one of our our writers on the show yeah talk about you know more

about the writing process and also we wanted to talk to her her name is laurie kilmartin because she's a really great stand-up comic we've had her on before she works all the time we make fun of her because she's constantly doing stand-up sets and that's even true now in quarantine yes she's still performing all over the world all over the world thanks to zoom she's doing sets literally all over in different countries yeah this was really cool i wanted to hear about how stand-up is still working right now. Exactly. And she had the answers. And more.

So why don't we chat with Lori Kilmartin right now? Okay. Hi, Lori. Welcome back to the podcast. You guys, thanks for having me back so quickly. It's been a couple years, right? Oh my God. It feels like it. It hasn't been that long, but thank you for making time in your busy daily schedule for us. You know what? I actually do not have a set tonight, but I will have sets like for the rest of the week. A standup comedy set. You currently have a brick background for your virtual

Zoom background. Do you do that when you're doing stand-up shows? I do. It's just to get me in the mood, to get the Zoom audience in the mood. You know, they're all sitting on their couches and I need them to know this is a professional show. They should have backgrounds with, you know, couples sitting behind them at little tables. In the round. Oh yeah, they should. Oh oh that's right now that's a great idea oh my god that's actually a great idea if people figure it out you should put the name of the club you're oh i guess you're you're clubless right are you doing i mean we might as well talk about now the stand-up say you're doing tonight is it affiliated with a particular comedy club or no um yeah it's a lot of different clubs are just sponsoring comedy shows they're kind of learning how to do it i did a a benefit for flappers which is a last week in burbank yes

it's for flappers and uh maria bamford headlined and jackie cation and I each did a set and we had like almost 300 people. And so they pay. And that's, is that bigger than Flapper's capacity? It's a fire hazard. It's, it's close to their capacity, but that's, you know, it's just one show that they got, you know, they usually have like 20 shows a week or something like that. So. Wow. Well, you do 20 shows there a week. Yes. So they kept the door. You're legendary on the writing. There's several stand-ups on our Conan writing staff.

I don't think anyone does more sets per week than you. Well, it certainly has paid off in my level of success. That's what I have to say. You work all the time, man. You'll headline across the country. Don't get me bragging about you. You don't do it for the money. You do it for the pure art of it. Exactly.

Wait, so 300 people signed up for this and they all paid, I assume? Flappers sold tickets and then they got the Zoom link after they bought a ticket. And they were 10 bucks each. So they made maybe like $ for that night the club did wow and they didn't have to pay you know bus boys and yes so all profit for them oh yeah they're oh yeah they're living large like all clubs now horrible new view into the future so those 300 people i assume all you can't see them but you can can hear their mics. You know, in Zoom, you could there's gallery pages. And so there was like, I don't know, several pages, you know, like in the 20s of pages of people.

And so you could kind of flip through the page as well. The other comics are on stage and check out, check people out and see who's doing what. And it's also a way for whoever's hosting this show to kind of figure out who's making noise. If someone's making noise or someone's heckling, you can mute them. So they don't have to mute themselves? You want to hear the laughter, I guess. You want to hear the laughs, right? Yeah. The best way to do it is to mute everybody and unmute about 10 people.

But not everyone's doing that. So sometimes it's a mess. But one show I did recently, they had VIPs. And so people could apply to be a VIP in the in the showroom. And they're sort of promising they're not going to be on the phone, they're not gonna be taking calls or whispering or rustling papers or anything like that. You can still get laughs when you tell a joke if the audio doesn't screw up. I mean, there's there's like a lot of little things that can go wrong that make you feel terrible. More terrible than usual. Yes, exactly. You know, it's a substitute.

It's not a great one, but it's okay. And it is a way for some comics to make money. I mean, people do Venmo you after the show and stuff like that. But it doesn't replace real comedy work or anything like that. I guess it's a way to stay sharp until we all get to, until, you know, Gretchen Whitmer frees us up, guys. Free America so we can go out. I have to ask this. When you look through the pages of people in the audience, are some people doing weird stuff or like trying to be funny? A lot of people are holding pets. Okay. People look like they're clutching onto anything to feel some sort of comfort.

Like I've never actually felt like comedy was more necessary. Like usually at a stand-up club, you know, people pop in and you don't know how they got tickets. Sometimes it's like a Groupon or they were forced into it by friends or something. And it feels like everyone who takes the time to download Zoom and go in and figure it out really, really wants to be there and really, really wants to hear the show. And so for the most part, they seem more grateful than a regular audience because after the show, a regular audience will, you know, come up to the comic next to you and go, you are my favorite. And you're like, I'm right here. The people that are there seem pretty grateful that they're getting a live show. I think people are getting sick of content in a way. And their spouses. Yes. But I mean,

even if you watch like Netflix or something, if you watch a special, it's, it's, you know, obviously highly produced, but I think people like the the potential for things to go wrong and and everything and and the live element of a of a zoom show that makes sense laurie you mentioned something i was really keen to ask about which is hecklers on zoom are there hecklers on zoom they're and you're really good at dealing with hecklers we have to say laurie's like legendarily good at it. Oh, yeah. You know, in a club, it's different because you can see them. Like if you get heckled and you have to scroll through eight pages of people, it's ruined.

Who said that? You show yourself. I'll scroll down to you. Don't make me scroll down. So, yeah. So that kind of messes with that. What kind of asshole? Hecklers as much as people not realizing their whispers can be heard,

or there's a lot of, there's people just moving papers and that will destroy a joke for 150 people. Cause someone's moving a pile of papers over. It's stuff that they don't realize. So, Lori, so you said big clubs are organizing shows right now. What about like smaller indie type clubs? Is that happening too? I just said yes to a show out of Boulder. It's weird because you can do any show as long as

you're awake at that time and that time zone. Jackie Cation just did a show like 11 in the morning for European fans. And they had a bunch of people sign in. So you could do a world tour right now. Finally, I could. The great cities of Europe. For the East Coast, most of the shows start at 9 and then West Coast is 6 p.m. So that's how most of the American shows are kind of using that time frame. So everyone can log in as many people as possible. I love that everyone's at home and they're still sticking to like, oh, no, 9 p.m. Yeah. I thought everyone was asleep now at 9. I'm in bed at 9,

10. Are you going to bed earlier than usual under these conditions? Or do you find yourself staying up later? I have a 13-year-old son. And he does this thing where he finishes all of his schoolwork in two days because they give him the whole week on Monday. And then he lives like a rock star Wednesday through Sunday. So he's up very late. If a rock star Wednesday through Sunday. So he's up very late. And if a rock star lived with their mother, there's certain limitations.

He, he loves, he loves anime. So I started watching anime with him to, you know, be a good mom and be into his interests, but keep an eye on him. He's watching was really good.

So we, you know, we watch a couple episodes like starting at 11 30 at night we'll bang out a couple and then i go to bed yeah you are a good mom watching anime with your child that's very impressive it's really good stuff mike you don't understand no i i get it i'm a manga guy myself. Lori's doing YouTube rants about anime now. But you, okay, so you mentioned you live with your son and your mom, right? She lives with me. I'd like to point that out. That's how it went.

Your mother lives with you. You take care of your mother, which is very saintly of you. Does that affect how you can perform from home? I mean, like, are you worried that they're going to hear something that you don't want them to hear? My mom knows that I want her to die. And so she's not thrown off by my jokes. But my son doesn't know everything I'm saying about him. And I'm making some stuff up too. So then I sort of like whisper it a little bit. But I do it from right here where I'm doing this. And I just put notes on the door, do not disturb, which my mom opens the door constantly. She'll break through this one as well.

No wonder you want to off her. There's no excuse for that behavior. Does she watch anime with you and your son? That might be a- No, no, no, no. That could be the bonding. Maybe that's what's missing from your relationship. So your mother, she barges in when you're doing stand-up? I would pay to see your stand-up show if your mother got it. I know. That sounds great. You guys could do a team bit.

She doesn't barge in. She sort of wanders in. And so because I have like a virtual background, I just start to see pieces of her come into focus as she comes towards me. It's like a horror movie. Yeah, it is, really. Because I have the headphones in and I'm talking, so I don't really, you know. She's like the girl from The Ring. You're right. Why don't we talk about the writing?

Because a lot of people have been, and by a lot of people, I mean, Jesse and I, we're curious. Now, people have asked how the writing's being done for these Conan at Home shows. So, I mean, you write a lot of sketch comedy, but you also. No, I don't. Well, no, that's not true. You pitch a ton of sketch stuff. You pitch sketch stuff. Oh, I pitch a ton. You do tons of sketch stuff on the show, but your specialty is also the monologue. Yeah. That's the more fun part. So I wish... Is that more fun for you? Yeah. I really loved our routine that we had when we were in the studio. And I really miss it a lot. You know, like Brian and I would write jokes and then we'd, you know, get some feedback. We'd be in a little bit with Conan and then we'd have like a maybe a 45 minute afternoon meeting or half hour with Conan, which is, you know, Conan in the dressing room, sort of getting into show mode, which is hilarious. And it was always just a ton of laughs.

Yes. And so I really miss that structure, you know, desperately. Yeah. Now it's, I mean, you still are getting premises every day. You're still dealing with daily premises and you and Brian Kiley, the other monologue writer, are writing jokes. But then once you submit them, it goes through a different tunnel than usual. It goes into a tunnel of silence. A black hole.

A black hole. And then you tune in. That's where our sketches go too, Lori. Don't worry. The black hole is it allows your brain to just start working over time. And so I really miss being in the studio. I really do.

No, you do want that feedback on the stuff you wrote. So do you start worrying right away? Like, oh, they didn't, you know, someone didn't like those jokes. Yeah. Or are you sure enough to go? I expect to be fired during this podcast. So if that doesn't happen, I'll be pretty happy. You assume that everyone else is on a group email talking about you.

And what a bad job you're doing. And they are. They asked us to distract you with this. As they chitter away about you. We're producing shows a day in advance. So everything is being fully sent to the network a day in advance. So it's hard to be super topical right now. Right, right.

And then Conan also has not done monologues most nights. Yeah, I mean, he's starting to do something where it's sort of like personal, which, you know, so we're just kind of writing more personal stuff. I think both Brian and I are just like, well, what's this like for me? All right, it's probably like this for Conan, too, you know, in terms of worrying about your weight or all that kind of crap. And so he seems to be incorporating that a little bit more into his opening comments.

So that's like something I can point to or something. But yeah. And plus the news is, I mean, it's always grim, but it's horrific now. So to do topical stuff is really hard, you know, including the delay. It's just there's not many silly little news stories that you even want to take time to talk about, you know. No. Because even if something silly happens in Florida, you're still like, oh, but a lot of people are dying, too. Right.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, they're Floridians, so it's okay. Right, right, right. Yeah, okay right yeah yeah open season have feelings but also the lighter topics always used to be oh you can make fun of you know bad movies or tv shows or yeah and then also sports occasionally is like fodder like if none of that none of that stuff's around right now it's all shut down it's all shut down it's it's an acceleration of like when trump was elected president like almost celebrities went away because he was the most famous person in the world and he dominated everything and he sucked up all the oxygen he did like you who cared about kardashians after that and who cared about a lot of stuff that we used to make fun of. So that's a good thing.

Listen, cheers to them. I miss them greatly. All three of them had different takes. And now Trump is, like before he was bumbling, but it wasn't in a way that had threatened the entire Earth. I don't know. It just seems so, so much worse now what's happening to the United States that it's hard to even try to find an angle on him. I know, like we always think that we've hit the bottom and then there's, that's a false bottom and there's another quicksand underneath that. Yes. Imagine the whole second term. It's going to be crazy. Oh no, Stop it. Yeah. You're a heckler.

I paid my fucking money. I want a heckle. No, but I think Conan's doing a little more, just like a minute or two of personal stuff up front, which is something. He's been doing a few things that he used to do in the writer's room. Like he'd come in and go, Hey, ask me how I did in the, if he has glasses on,

ask me how I did in the fight and then turn away and then make his glasses askew and turn forward and go pretty good, I guess. We would laugh every time. Cause because you know we enjoy our jobs and uh no but i love when he did it on the show i know in the fudge thing and yeah i mean i for him he was saying he literally was doing it in a vacuum which really you know for comedian obviously the way you're talking about with stand up it's it's really hard and it's just him and iphone and so now i think he has matt o'brien the head writer on zoom simultaneously so he's at least at least it's like there's one other person

in the room yes yeah so that matt can be just looking at his phone during. But it's sort of like a meat mix speed or halfway between podcast and, and actual late night monologue kind of the energy. Yeah. It's not so casual that it feels like he's just talking. Right. Yeah. Cause we still have time constraints. Right.

Yeah. Like he and Matt talk every night. It's like, well, you know, based on the interview length, you know, you kind of work backwards. I mean, everything can be adjusted a little bit time wise, like the interview, the comedy, and then his opening remarks. But yes, he's kind of reined into like, okay, this should be two and a half minutes. And then you throw to, you know, a piece with Sona or something like that. So yeah, he is, he has reigned in that way. Are you, Lori, do you have the capacity or energy right now to write new material of your

own? Like, are you performing? Yeah, I'm working on stuff. Yeah. Yeah. I don't want it to be all Corona based. Right. Well, luckily you still hate your mom during quarantine. You know, it's, it's weird. Like I have this whole chunk about wanting her to die and trying to kill her. And I thought, like it's honed.

And I actually recorded it for an album. And I'm like, surely by the time this is out, she'll be dead. Like I can't revisit. Like I kept thinking my life would change at some point, but it's like Groundhog's Day. I mean, my kid's growing up, so that's a little bit different, but I'm like, I can't believe she's still

here. I don't know where else to go besides I actually murdered her and it turns into a confession of a crime. Right. I mean, if you did... There are so many confessions. So much evidence. there aren't a lot of, uh, homicidal comics out there who, I mean, that, that would be a niche that you would own.

That could be your stick. There are a lot of sex offenders, but not many murderers. That's true. That's true. Except you would actually probably have to suffer consequences. As women should. Including they'd play this podcast as, well, could she really have done it? Listen to this. She wrote a chunk about it.

She literally said she was going to. Well, she's clearly holding on just for spite. Yeah, I mean, she's clearly holding on just for spite yeah i mean maybe reverse psychology and she has respiratory problems like she's everything covid was manufactured in a lab for and yet she's still here and you're saying that you want her dead but you have been safe i mean you're not going out and intentionally contracting it no bring it home. No, I mean, I know that if one of us got it, it would be me, and I would be one of those like a tragedy, like, oh, we can't believe

it, a cautionary tale. And then she would stay alive. Yeah, that's right. I love the way Jesse's rehabilitating you. He would deliberately go out and contract the disease. Oh, boy. Well, I thought I should point and contract the disease. Oh, boy. Well, I thought I should point out that Lori is a caring daughter.

Very, very caring. Not intentionally given COVID to her mom. So many comedians just openly, you know, have issues with their parents. And if you go away from stand-ups, people are like, wait, you can't say things like that about your parents. It's like comics all hate their parents. Oh, yeah. I know. Yeah.

So used to it. I hope we're not shocking anyone with these revelations. I'm always, whenever I see like women will post that their mom is their best friend. And I'm like, I don't understand that. It's because their mom is standing over their shoulder looking at it. Some of these Facebook ladies believe it. I swear to God, Jesse. I can't believe when people take time off from work to go to a grandparent's funeral.

I'm like, wait, what? Oh, that's just an excuse to take time off. Thank you. Thank you. Count how many grandparents those people have. Like 20. My grandparents were, you know how they say like, oh, well, one grandmother's nice, but the other one's mean. All mean.

Wow. So you have zero out of four grandparents were nurturing? Oh, for four. Their loss. I was a wonderful child. May do who you are. No, they sized me up and were like, no, we're lost. I was a wonderful child. You may do who you are. No, they sized me up and were like, no, we're not doing that. We have a listener question for us to answer.

And maybe this is something that Lori could weigh in on. Yes. Since she knows more about the comedy scene right now. Hi, I'm Cy Conan. It's all I'm in here. I have a question for you guys. I'm a senior in high school getting ready to go to college. And I was wondering, as a incoming freshman, what are some things to do to get into

the comedy world in terms of internships, jobs, maybe things to do at your campus? So just wondering if you had any insights as to what I can do during college to get into the comedy world. Thank you. This is a great time to get into comedy. All the clubs are closed and it's a great time to get into anything. Oh my God. Become a nurse. Seriously. Oh my God.

Become a front liner. The funniest stuff I see on like being created by like young people. I mean, so much funny stuff is on TikTok, you know? Yeah. Gosh, really funny. I don't know how that gets monetized or if that leads to things. Well, but I think at that stage in your career, maybe you shouldn't be thinking about making money off of something. It's just about doing a lot of comedy and true and getting good at it and

getting good at it. Yeah. And that's the time to be bad at it for a while. Yes. It seems like, uh, if you can edit, that's a great skill to have.

You talk about video editing, like, yeah. Editing your own stuff. Yeah. Yes. Even more so than performing. Cause you can sort of

figure out how to make yourself seem better in editing, you know, once you get your, I don't know. I'm not really sure. It's, what an awful time to be.

I feel so bad for this guy, for all these guys, you know? But, you know, probably every college now has 20 improv teams and stand-up nights or even like a satirical newspaper where you could meet like-minded people which is you know something you always hear and it's true

is just meeting other people your age or roughly your age who are into the same thing is kind of a great yeah starting point. You know, one thing he could do is he could host a comedy show. I mean, there's so many comics that you could pretty much email anyone and say, are you available? Or find them on Twitter. They could DM them on Twitter. If he could get good at setting up a Zoom room, you know, and good at producing, which means just, you know, making sure everyone has, which means just, you know, making sure everyone has the links that they need and talking to the audience and making sure they know what to do. He could host a show. He doesn't have to even be funny. He could just say, um,

this is my show. I'm hosting it. You know, maybe you could do a joke or two if you wanted to, but if you were nervous, you wouldn't have to just introduce the comics. And that's how, you know, you can kind of, kind of get into comedy, at least maybe get to know people a little bit. Yeah. I mean, every stand-up in the world is completely accessible right now. You know, you could. And they don't have excuses for saying no. Right.

I mean, you can. There's some people that aren't doing digital shows at all. They've refused. But, I mean, you know, you can contact some comics in london and you know at 11 a.m their time they could do a show for you know you and on the east coast or whatever so yeah that's a great suggestion and we've had a couple interns from the conan show who have gone on to produce comedy shows i thought that was really smart oh yeah for sure yeah smart way to kind of make contacts and see a lot of comedy. Yeah.

Dip your toe into it. If you can deal with all the nerdy stuff around producing a Zoom show, it's not a bad time to do it. Well, he starts college in the fall, I guess. And I'm sure by then everything will be back to normal. Oh, he's a high school senior. Yeah. Oh, I thought he was just graduating from college. So, oh, I see. Oh, yeah. Yeah. I thought he was a, he just graduating from college. So, Oh,

I see. Oh yeah. Okay. He's just, you know, he still has time. He probably actually developed soon. He's probably an app developer, so he probably would know how to do better than any of us.

We should start a pool. When do you think, if you had to guess like a comedy club would reopen? I know a couple, I mean, I'm sure they're all trying to figure it out. Maybe they're all talking to each other, but I know there's a club in Minneapolis that's already planning to,

as soon as they can have limited people in the showroom, like you'd never be able to pack it out until there's a vaccine. Say you have people six feet apart. And then the rest of the people watching the show would buy tickets on zoom. And so maybe the people in the showroom would pay a little bit more. And then the Zoom people... Would they have to wear masks? In the showroom? Yeah. Probably

because of the spray of laughter. Laughter seems particularly problematic. Awful. It's really dangerous for the comic if it's being aimed... It's pretty much a cough. Yes. Yes, Yes. So, yeah, the audience would have to be back and maybe there might have to be plexiglass up.

I mean, the more you describe it, the worse it sounds. And yet everything sounds awful. But you're like, all right, let's I mean, I've worked horrible gigs before. Where there was like I was on stage. This is in like Elko, Nevada. And then there's a bar in front of me. And then in front of the bar was a line of like quarter slot machines. And then the audience started sitting beyond that. Those are like concentric circles beyond all that.

So in terms, I mean, most comics have worked hell gigs like that. So I guess telling jokes. That might be the worst. And I've heard bad ones. The slot machines really pushes that one over the top. Awful. So in terms of distractions, it's been worse. You know, it's just so it's strange.

But I mean, we get used to that stuff pretty quick, just like we're getting used to this. Wow. Yeah. I mean, there will probably be some things that come out of this that are good innovations, too. Like we may think oh this is better than it was before in some ways oh the comic is on the other side of the brick wall that's a brilliant idea right off the bat not shaking hands with the mc is right great i mean who knows where those hands have been what penises they were jerking off before the show. I know I've

always gone, why did I just touch this guy? Especially because I know this one. Yeah, you might bring your own microphone now. Yeah, when I did shows, I think March 15th might have been my last show in New York, and I brought my own phone. It was like the last possible day that it could. It was a Sunday brunch show, I think. Yeah. So I brought my own foam cover to put on top of the mic. A cute one that's personalized.

Oh, yeah. With my closer callback buzzword on it. Oh, yeah. You can sell them after the show. Sure. Oh, yeah. Set up a little table in the back. Or one that is red so that you could put it on like a clown nose.

Oh, yeah. There you go. Oh, what is that awful? I can't count the amount of money I'm going to make after this ends. Lori, thank you so much. Thanks, you guys. This was really fun. It was a lot of fun.

Lori is totally joking about, you know, wanting to offer mom guys. Come on. That's what a comic does. You should end this with a gunshot. That would be great. You could just add that in post. That's a good cliffhanger. Yeah.

But was it Lori or was it her mom? And did Lori kill herself? I mean, so many questions. So many possibilities. Was it Atticus's anime show? Thanks, Lori. Thanks, Lori. Thank you.

See you in a few hours. Yeah. Bye. Bye. And that was Lori Kilmartin, her confession. Yes. To killing her mom. Yeah.

But as long as her mother doesn't, or the authorities don't listen to this podcast, everything should work out. I like to imagine because I listened to so many true crime podcasts that maybe real detectives listen to this. She's kind of auditioning, I think for a real crime. That's true.

Yeah. Like maybe she wants to be her own dirty John. Right. And maybe a producer from we'll reach out that's true. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like maybe some... Yeah, she wants to be her own Dirty John. Right. And maybe a producer will reach out and say, okay, you know, if you follow through, we'll have you on.

At this point, though, is one murder really enough for a podcast? Depends how you do it, you know, if it's really special. One elderly murder feels like not even...

You shouldn't even have to go to jail for that. if it's really special. One elderly murder feels like not even. You shouldn't even have to go to jail for that. Well, that's our show for this week. Yes. And we'll be back next week. And also, you know what? We love the questions fans have been sending in. We do. And if you would be interested in doing so,

you can email us insideconanpod at gmail.com or leave a voicemail at 323-209-5303. Yeah, we love hearing from you. Yeah. And we'll be back next week, unless we're dead. And either way, we like you. Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast is hosted by Mike Sweeney and me, Jesse Gaskell. Produced by Jen Samples. Engineered and mixed by Will Becton. Supervising producers are Kevin Bartelt and Aaron Blaire. Executive produced by Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco.

And Colin Anderson and Chris Bannon at Earwolf. Thanks to Jimmy Vivino for our theme music and interstitials. You can rate and review the show on Apple Podcasts. And of course, please subscribe and tell a friend to listen to Inside Conan

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