Inside Conan: An Important Hollywood Podcast - Timothy Olyphant, Moses Storm, J.P. Buck

Episode Date: March 15, 2019

Conan writers Mike Sweeney and Jessie Gaskell welcome comedian Moses Storm to share his unbelievable story about growing up with parents who started an unsuccessful cult. Then, Conan’s Stand-up Booker J.P. Buck joins Mike and Jessie to talk about how he finds talent for the show and gives great advice for aspiring comedians. Plus, we hear how a fan perfectly insulted both Timothy Olyphant and Conan at a restaurant.Moses Storm Taped Over Christian Homeschool Videos To Record “Late Night”: https://teamcoco.com/video/moses-storm-taped-over-christian-homeschool-videos-to-record-late-nightGot a question for Inside Conan? Call our voicemail: [phone] and e-mail us at [e-mail] Conan videos, tour dates and more visit TeamCoco.com.

And now, it's time for Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast. This is Inside Conan. I'm Mike Sweeney. I'm Jessie Gaskell. And we're excited to be together again. We are. We can't get enough. We're together every day. We're excited to be together with microphones. It's a whole different dynamic. So this is the podcast where we show you behind the scenes of the Conan show.

And we learn right along with you how a late night show gets made. It's a real eye opener. I had no idea. I know. I've only been working in late night for 10 years. I learn something new every time. I really do. Today, we actually learned a lot from our guests.

Yeah, I learned that some of my coworkers are very qualified to do their job. I was stunned at the resume of one of our interviewees today. It's very impressive. So people deserve to be here. It's kind of cool. Yep. So today we are going to talk to comedian Moses Storm, who is on the show this week. Yes. He had some incredible stories. He, you know, stand-up comics generally have interesting childhoods.

His is way up there, I think. His takes the cake. It's way up in the top ten. Yeah, so he told us about growing up with parents who started an unsuccessful cult. Right. If a child came up to you now, you'd be like, hi! That's very bold of you. Hi! So you'd be like,

yes to whatever you're about to say. And I'd be like, yeah, I had it for hell. And they're like, what's that? H-E-E-L. So precocious. Right. And then I would hand them like a propaganda flyer that my dad had drawn of Mickey Mouse getting crucified. Man, it's bad enough saying you grew up with parents that started a cult, but one that didn't quite catch on. I know. They weren't very good at it.

Oh, that's rough. Oh, we also talked to J.P. Buck. He books all the comedians on our show. Yeah. You know, we learned some of his secrets and also some of the things he looks for and how he does his job. And in today's world, he actually looks at comedians from all over the world. Yeah. I said world twice. And he... Not ideal.

Go for a fourth. Sorry. And his worldview really brings the world of comedy into us on a very intimate slash world basis. Yeah. He gave, I thought, some really good advice for aspiring comics. Yeah. Who might want to get on. Absolutely.

But first, Sweens. Yeah. What do you say we talk about? Oh, Jesse, what? Sorry. What do you say we talk about what happened on Conan this week? Yeah, let's do it. The Conan show.

We had some great guests this week. Some great comedy, too. On the television show. Absolutely. Still a thing. Moses Storm, of course, who you're going to hear more from later. Bert Kreischer. Kathy Bates was on. Ugh, icon. She's great. And Timothy Oliphant. Yes.

Who always has a really good rapport with Conan, because I think they hang out in real life. They hang out. Right, right, right, right. So one of my favorite moments from the Timothy Oliphant interview, Oliphant, that's a hard name to say because it's so much like elephant. I have no idea how to say it. Conan always says the Oliphant in the room. Yes.

One of my favorite moments was when they told a story of a fan coming up and- They're in a restaurant together, I think. And yes, they're in a restaurant together I think and yes they're someone came up and kind of perfectly insulted both of them in one fell swoop it was a real piece of yeah I was jealous she was so excited to see both of us and

she said no you don't understand she said if I could have a guy with and she referenced to me, with your looks. And then she looked at you and said, and your brain. Wow. You know, it's awesome. That is awesome.

She left and both of us felt like shit. It was rude. It was like. One thing I don't think I realized until I started working for Conan is how often people come up to him and just say weird things. And now the selfie. Oh, yeah. The advent of the smartphone. It's people just, they don't even ask anymore.

They used to politely like, could I get a photo? And now it's just like, hey, you come here. It literally is like, hey. Yeah. You see my phone, you know what you have to do. Yeah, yeah. Like we know you're a trained celebrity dog. Get over here. This is a binding agreement. Oh, I've seen it wordlessly. Yeah. yeah. Like, we know you're a trained celebrity dog. Get over here.

This is a binding agreement. Oh, I've seen it wordlessly done. Yeah, yeah. I like when they give me the camera. Oh, right. Then I just take a selfie of myself. Oh, that's great. I never tell them that.

I like sometimes when we've been traveling in other countries, people will ask for the photo and then afterwards they'll ask me, they'll say, who is this? It's true. They just know that it's someone that they want a photo with that's right who's famous and then they'll look it up later. This will go with my other photo of people I don't know. I like when they think

he's a different host. That's always exciting. We love that bit in the cars. Right, they think he's Martha Stewart. That's always exciting. We love that bit in the cars. Right. They think he's Martha Stewart. We redid our kitchen based on your recommendations. It's fun, though,

because in other countries, he does a thing where he kind of mutters under his breath. As a joke, he calls people murderer. Right. Hilarious. It's calls people murderer. Right. Ha ha hilarious.

It's a compulsion. Yes. I do think it's a little bit of a tick. I don't know if he, I wonder if he truly does it when he's alone. Like I would be curious to set up some GoPros. He's calling himself murderer. Like if he mutters it with,

about people when there isn't an audience for it. Yeah. But he says it pretty. He says it loud. He will say it as loud as he needs to. But he'll say it really quickly. So I think most people don't know. Murderer. They're like, he didn't call me a murderer.

He didn't just say that. Or maybe the people are like, oh, I guess those other people. One of the other people there is a murderer. Yeah. But it can't be me. I don't even know this man. and I just served him his entree. How would he know that I've murdered? Right.

You know, when he's in other countries, you think he would learn to say murderer in their native language. In their language. I think that would be a nice touch. That would be a goal. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That would be respectful. Anyway, we digress. So, yes, the next time you ask for a selfie, you listen for the trailing murderer as he steps away.

Yes. And also ask, because it's polite. Yeah. Why don't we jump into our conversation with Moses Storm? Oh, yeah. That would be great. Yeah. He has an amazing, as we mentioned earlier, an incredible backstory.

Yeah. His childhood is one to savor. Check it out. Well, can we talk a little bit? You have a wild backstory. There's so many comedians I know who, you know, they almost love to, it's like a game to see who can outdo each other

for having the most crazy fucked up childhood. And yours, I was very impressed by how fucked up it was. Yeah, it's very fucked up. Legitimately. It wasn't like you manipulated things. No. Yeah, so my parents started and ran an unsuccessful cult.

Oh, they started it. They started it. I didn't know they were go-getters. Do you think that's better or worse than if it had been successful? I think, well, yes, it would probably be a problem, but I do legitimately, outside of any sort of bit, I watch these Netflix documentaries and all these podcasts about cults, and I legitimately get jealous.

Right, like the Bhagwan. Yeah, of like, oh, they have these sex parties. There's gun running. There's FBI chases. Yes, like the Bhagwan. Yeah. Yeah, of like, oh, they have these like sex parties. There's gun running. There's like FBI chases. Yes, private jets. We had nothing. We had a bunch of neon signs and no one cared. So what, you said they failed. Yeah.

What were the most followers they had? So they had zero followers. Okay. Not even their children? Yeah, they were like, let's make some. And then they had five children and then that's why I'm alive for that purpose. Right. So no, but not even a neighbor who would casually drop in on a pity?

People would hang around with us for like a little bit, but once they figured out that we didn't have weed, they'd be like, okay, no, this isn't. What's the point? Is weed a big part of a community? Well, you think because we would be like hippies because the facade of it is that we were in a bus traveling around. You lived in a bus. We lived in a old Greyhound bus that they had ripped the seats out of.

Oh, Greyhounds. Nice. I was thinking, I was feeling bad for you. It was a school bus, but Greyhound has... Okay. You've clearly never been on a Greyhound. He tips the Greyhound driver. I do.

Driver. Salmon. Salmon is right, I believe. Oh, no, that was the guy in the deli. What's the catch of the day on this Greyhound? Syphilis. And so they converted an old, beat-up, broken-down Greyhound bus into an RV themselves. Like, not well.

They didn't do a good job. Wow. It didn't turn out at all. My dad built us bunk beds, but he forgot to measure for the mattress in the back. Always a common bus turning into home mistake. Common. It's the first thing you thought of when you're in your bus. You're like, what were the size of the bunk beds?

Don't be angry at your father. He's not his fault. But the reason that, I just reminded us, the reason that the bunks had to be so small in that particular area of the bus

is so my parents had room inside of the bus for an industrial size cotton candy machine that we were going to quote, make money off of. Oh,

so that was the side product? That was like the side thing is that we'd show up and we'd yell at people like, you're headed for hell and then spun sugar. So that was the side product? That was like the side thing is that we'd show up and we'd yell at people like, you're headed for hell, and then spun sugar? So did the machine was literally installed?

It's an industrial sized one, so once it's in there, it doesn't move. Right. And it gets so hot. Good for the gas economy. Yes. Oh my god. I love that even then they knew that, they're like, we're not going to get people in. Right.

They already had a plan, a terrible plan B. There's no self-esteem in the cult. We're going to need a side hustle. Did they also let them like throw baseballs at you guys or something or like some kind of carny games? That would be fun. That's all like things that I'm like, yeah, they could have done all these things. So would your dad or mother have a driving itinerary every day or would you just? Here's the other embarrassing thing is that they got the bus to be like, we're going to go everywhere.

Right. We spent most of our time in Florida. You can only stay in an RV park for two weeks at a time. And my dad found two RV parks that were within four miles of each other. And we would just oscillate between the two parks for six years. To the point where even hurricanes would come and hit the gulf where we were living. And my dad was like, we're going to ride it out.

We're going to ride it out now. In the rolliest of all the foundations. A bus. Because you didn't have the gas money because of the cotton candy machine. Cotton candy was just not. No one wanted fun sugar. This is incredible.

It's an amazing story. What were some of the tenets of this? Yeah. Of the cult. So it's like a mix of Judaism, Catholicism, and Christianity. Sort of like the greatest hits. They kind of cherry picked all the least fun parts of those religions. So it's just like all rules.

Uh-huh. Nothing that's pleasurable or fun. All shame. All shame. Everyone you meet is essentially doomed, headed for hell. They would hate you. Now is cotton candy, is that a Judaism or is that, that's Catholic, right? Cotton candy is their DMT.

That's the way to enlighten them. Did they work the cotton candy into any of their tattoos? No. That also would have been a great idea, right? You rope them in with a sweet treat. Well, can they give it another try? Are they? They look back on it right now.

It's like a little scary how they look back on it. They look back on it like how white people look back on having dreadlocks in their 20s. It was crazy, man. Like that was whimsical. Yeah. What was I thinking? So they just slap it off? They laugh it off now, yeah.

Oh, six years in Florida. Right. And did all the kids go into comedy? No. Everyone has like a rebellion, got the most stable job and became just like a great father and is sending their kids to real school. How many siblings? Finance bros and they're all addicted to cocaine.

No, they're all just like, they work at a grocery store or like they make contacts. So it's very like... They learn to trade and actually, yeah. Yes. Just trying to like blend in and I'm the one person that's like, I'm going to spin this into gold. I'm still going to win mom and dad back.

Right. My zany lifestyle. This is all for them. So do your parents, do they give your siblings a hard time for being straight? No, not at all. Because what happens when you have,

or at least from a very young age, when you're sentient enough to be like, oh, my parents, they don't got it. They don't got this. Is that the power dynamic shifts where you kind of become a peer with them. So it's just like we're all in this together. Also, we were making more, if not the same amount of money as them. With the cotton candy.

With our cotton candy. The weird side jobs that we would have. So there was never like, can I have money? So you were contributing to the household from an early age. Well, up until like even three years ago was still like giving my mom money. Yeah. Yeah. Moving every two weeks back and forth, would you be back?

Yes, I'm glad you stuck on that. Returning to one and were people like, did your dad be like, hey, we just happened to be in the area two weeks later? He tried to play it off. And then the embarrassing is RV parks are filled with people that are just traveling. So people would have all these great travel stories. Like if we were just in Baton Rouge and then we went to Mardi Gras. And then we would be like, we were a hundred years away.

Have you been down the street? There's a gas station down there. The 7-Eleven across town. It's great. The scratchy lottery tickets there, almost all winners. Would your dad put religious objects outside the bus once he went to Atlanta? So at a Greyhound bus night, knowing that you've never seen a Greyhound bus, they have sometimes the bus routes at the front.

These are these things that you yell at and you go, what's that train doing on this street in your leather Bentley? Did yours say heaven? It always had, like, you guys are headed for hell. What's a train doing on this street in your leather Bentley? Did yours say heaven? Next stop, heaven. It always had like, you guys are headed for hell. Like it always had something very eye-catching. Yes. It wasn't subtle at all.

Why not go there with a delicious cotton candy? Do you think that they would have, if they had known about the Westboro Baptist Church, would they have been a part of something like that? No, because they took a lot of pride in their own thing. So why they wouldn't claim that they're Christian or Jewish is that there's rabbis, priests, pastors, all those are wrong. It should be no middleman. It should just be you straight to God.

Except for them. Yeah. Except for them, I guess. They could get you there. Right, right. To point you in the right direction. Yeah. So no, but they did, similar to the way, my parents would like try to get arrested, where

it was like a badge of honor to like, oh, it's like, sir, you could just be on the sidewalk. You don't have to be in the intersection with that neon sign. And they got arrested? My dad got arrested once out of all the times he tried to get arrested. He literally couldn't get arrested. He couldn't get arrested. He couldn't. This is in Columbus, Ohio.

He finally got arrested. He was at some street festival. And it was like the middle of the night. And they're like, just don't. Like the concert's letting out. We need to let people through. And you're in the street. What was the concert uh it's like some music festival oh um i think it was like a rusted root concert it's like we're gonna pick some of them off and bring them to our side

yeah like that's another thing it's like this is that's not the most receptive people it's people leaving a concert or like spring break teens trying to be screaming on alcohol that's not the people that are like you know what I need right now? Some divine intervention. A direct path to yawning. Let me look at some of these misspelled propaganda signs. Oh, that's the other thing is my mom was, I'm going to talk about this on the show tonight, but my mom was also dyslexic.

No overlap. No side guy. Right. Fake in the comments for this podcast. My mom would, she would misspell some of the giant eye-catching signs, but they were so expensive to reproduce that sometimes she would just go out with a sign that said, you're headed for heel. Oh, my.

Yeah. That's a tough one to misspell. That's the one you try to drive at home. She didn't want to be part of the cult. She was trying to undermine your dad, I think. Did you kids ever get in trouble? Yeah. That's a lot of rules, and it's like a lot of the Bible goes against what kids are.

Like out in public with your parents, did anyone ever try to intervene or anything? Yeah. People would be like, this is wrong, because I would be two or three years old, and I would just have a loaded up sentence in my head where I would go up to an adult, and if a child came up to you now, you'd be like, hi! That's very bold of you, hi! So it's like, yes to whatever

you're about to say, and I'd be like, yeah, I had it for hell. And they're like, what's that? H-E-E-L. So precocious. Right. And then I would hand them like a propaganda flyer that my dad had drawn of Mickey Mouse getting crucified. Oh my God. Is that real? That's a very real thing.

That's just anti-Disney. Wow. Yeah, that sounds like a cool tattoo. I literally did. I remember that just in the moment. And the image of that is so funny. Being crucified. Of all the Disney characters.

It was like capitalism. Yeah. Yeah, I don't exactly know what that's saying. Now I would put that snowman from Frozen on the cross. Yes, get him crucified. Oh, get him out of there. I don't even know his name. I don't want to know his name.

Yeah, so he's into art. Do you have any of these brochures? Yes, I still have them in my personal collection. They're so full of hate that I can't post them as a throwback Thursday joke. Right. Because they're so like, ugh, so intolerant, so gross that I can't get behind it. But you're saving them for the Hulu documentary about your parents. Well, I definitely, over my bed, I have a giant framed crucified Mickey Mouse.

Leaving Greyhound is the name of the documentary. Leaving Greyhound. Can't wait. Did they paint the Greyhound? Yes. Spray paint. And guess what? You could tell.

Was it crazy colors? No, it was just like they tried to do a good job, which is even worse. It's like silver and teal. But spray paint does not go on like you hope. Especially not after a couple of hurricanes. No, not at all. Everything would fall apart. Dad was always like, it was like before YouTube tutorials,

he would like build a cabinet and it would just shatter the second you close it. Yeah. And people would want to come in because it was mostly just like honey wagons and real RVs. So people are like, oh my God, you converted your own bus? And they'd get maybe two steps in and be like, oh, okay, we're going to go. We're like, well, you've got to show you the back. They're like, no, we get it.

We get it. It was like it really wasn't selling them when they saw the craftsmanship. Not at all. Yeah. No. So am I gleaning correctly? Your parents are still together? No.

Okay. No. They divorced around the same time that the religion kind of disbanded. Oh, that was what I was wondering. The religion started to allow divorce. Right. Yes. And then immediately, yeah.

Do they blame or did they blame each blame each other for the failure of the cult? I think they just both wanted to have their 20s and then that never happened because of the religion. So then in their late 30s, they got divorced and had a midlife crisis. My mom became a professional bodybuilder. Wait, who did? My mom. Okay.

Yes. All right. So I would go to these contests as a kid, and nothing can prepare you for how boring a bodybuilding contest is going to be. It's just like three and a half hours of people three and a half hours yeah just flexing just like 92 nude people did you have to like oil her up for it or anything yes and that's a whole thing i gotta open up in therapy um yeah backstage was honestly terrifying for me as a kid because uh you think like oh, bodybuilders are strong. But when you see them in a contest, they haven't

eaten or drank anything in the last 48 hours. Wow. So to like get defined. Sure. So the backstage, these fucking beasts would just faint left and right and they'd fall on the ground. They'd like grab my arm to like steady themselves. And they'd make like a self-tanner mark on my arm.

But they slid off because of the oil. Slid right off. And then their trainer would start like reviving them and trying to squirt arm. But it slid off because of the oil. It slid right off. And then their trainer would start reviving them and trying to squirt water into their mouth because the human body needs that. Right. And then these bodybuilders would come to, and they would start freaking out about all the calories they just ingested in the water. And start making themselves throw up on the ground. So I would be backstage, and it's just like piles of muscles wrapped in skin just regurgitating on the ground. Yeah. To get rid of the water.

To get rid of any water weight. That should have been the show backstage. That, I would watch that, yes. Because the front is so boring. These guys look like superheroes, but they can't do anything. I'm just, you basically as a child had no idea what an adult looked like. No idea. No.

Like you did not have any. No frame of reference for like, this is a role model. Yeah. This is. With the bodybuilding where you're like, finally some normalcy in my life. It was. It was. It felt very stable.

It was not sad at all about the divorce. It was like, here's two people that a lot of 90s kids hold this bad. Like, my parents, two boys, everything fell apart. That was the most normal thing that ever happened to you. I was like, thank God. These people are terrible together. They could finally have their own life. Yeah, my dad was bi when they met.

And then my mom thought she could change him. And that's not how gay works at all so then 15 years later he was like uh no the bodybuilding was the last ditch attempt that is a great point that is a great point to be like i'll give you the body you want check out these pecs oh she would also never she never got that big she never won anything because she was not she was so vain that she wasn't willing to actually do it. To actually accrue muscles.

Yeah. Okay. Because like they stopped doing the female contest because they're so unpopular. Oh, is that true? Because no one wants to see that. Yeah. There's like amateur ones, but there's not like Miss Olympia. Like they just stopped five years ago.

Right, right. Because the whole, they would do the women's after and the entire audience would stand up and leave, and it would be like me and then four guys with two blue tits in. I oiled her. Right. I oiled her up. All right, Kate.

Help her by doing these things. Well, now is she, I feel like she must have a third iteration now. Is she doing something else now? Yeah, she's in an RV again. Okay. She's got a new husband. Oh, right. now? Yeah, she's in an RV again. She's got a new husband. And she just takes stuff from the trash and then

cleans it up and sells it at flea markets. And she gets to travel around a lot. She's still working out a bunch. So they're actually traveling in an RV. She's definitely leveled out and has become a mom to us all the ways I wish she would have when we were younger. So it's a nice, really

redemption story. That's a happy end to it. Yeah. I mean, it's not over. It's So it's a nice, really, like, redemption story. I mean, it's not over. It's not over. It's a happy point. Well, I think we've also become more tolerant, too. The older I get and the more mistakes that I make as an adult, like I was their same age when they had five kids,

and I don't think, honestly, I could, well, I could probably do a little bit better of a job. Probably wouldn't be in a bus, but I can't honestly say, because I don't have any children. You'd be on Conan's tour jet. Right. Yes, that would be better. And that has a cult-like environment. I forgot to mention I'm bringing five children with me. Right. In an industrial-sized

cotton candy machine that you cannot get around without getting hurt. We're losing altitude on account of the cotton candy machine. We can't stay up. Dump fuel. A couple of the kids. we can't lose the candy real quick just to go back

we're gonna let you go soon I promise oh I think Conan just did the show without us it's over yeah we definitely

Simon priorities I think you chose correctly no this was way better than whatever you're doing on the show yeah it makes sense no I'm sure it's great

so you so you're the first time that you did stand up on Conan. What was that process like for you? What did you have to do to kind of get your set ready? Did you talk to other people who had done it before? Yeah. Um, you're supposed to like run your set a bunch before. I didn't have the luxury of doing that because at the time I was shooting a teen drama in

Utah and there's like one club there. It's like a Mormon club. There's no alcohol or caffeine? There's no alcohol, no. That's actually what happens. They keep the house lights on. Almost cult-like. Right.

That's my base. And then they just sit with two Diet Cokes because you can't really have caffeine as a Mormon, but the loophole is Diet Coke. Right. So they would just start with two Diet Cokes, and they'd be dressed up like church, and they would just sit there with the lights on.

And that was the show. So it was like the worst place to run your set. So when I finally got here, flew in that morning of, got to do the show with such a warm audience. And you're like, people will laugh at this. And J.P. Buck books the comics on our show. Is there a great amount of back and forth with him leading up to the show? A lot.

To the point where you get a little bit angry. Right. Where you're like, why? I have to change this sentence? And you run the set so much that I started bombing with the set that I originally wanted to do on the show. Right. Because it was so rehearsed. And you're going up to the comedy club where people are doing the 15 that I originally wanted to do on the show. Right. Because it was so rehearsed.

And you're going up to the comedy club where people are doing like 15 and they're talking to the crowd. I'm going up with like a word perfect. A script. Yeah. Yeah. And people can tell that you're not having fun anymore. And then so.

JP's the only one in the audience laughing. That's fantastic. That's technically the words. But then I kind of scrapped that. And then just from doing all the Roof shows kind of retouched Face with JP and then had a much Funner looser set

I wonder if that's JP's plan all along Yeah like he's trying to break us like a horse Yeah And build you back up Break him down and build him up Also a cult strategy So that works on me the cult within

I am I have noticed just like I am more comfortable around people that are mean to me if you're like raised religious yeah people are like

yeah you're doing great I'm like ooh gross I don't trust that at all yeah so it was a it was a great it was a great experience

from being on the show and it was a night and day difference after everyone says now that these sets don't mean anything right It was a great experience from being on the show, and it was a night and day difference after. Everyone says now that these sets don't mean anything. Right. They're like, no one's watching late night sets anymore. But for me personally, the set did well online.

And you set it up indoors for better clubs. Yeah, absolutely. Wow, that's great. And sitcom opportunities, it was a light switch. It was a very clear oh that's really cool and I've pissed it all away so now I'm scrounging around for another set today

any loose time well turns out we do yeah so I'm excited for today thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us this is really fun I can tell that there are more stories Yeah, thank you so much for taking the time to talk to us. This is really fun. Yeah, I had a good time.

I had a good time. I can tell that there are more stories in you, so we may have to have you back sometime. I would love to. Can you come back in 10 minutes? Yes, in between my segment, in between the time I do a set on the show and the couch piece during that commercial break. I want to know the reps your mother was doing. Thank you very much. Yeah, thank you, Moses.

Good luck. Thank you for having me. Okay, we're going to take a quick break. And when we come back, we'll talk to J.P. Buck, Conan's stand-up booker. We're back with Inside Conan. Here's our conversation

with stand-up comedy booker on The Conan Show, J.P. Buck. So we just had a fun interview with Moses Storm. And it made us start thinking about the process of how stand-ups get booked on the show. And so we wanted to talk to our guest here, J.P. Buck. Hello, J.P. Hello. Welcome.

Well, thank you very much. It's a lovely studio. Thank you. Thank you. They can't. Well, thank you very much. It's a lovely studio. Thank you. Thank you. They can't see it. Thank you very much. And as Jesse said, you're in charge of booking all the comics. And we have a lot of stand-ups come on the show.

So it's a big, big job. sort of reputation for really finding new voices and often giving opportunities to people who've never done stand-up on late night before well i mean that all comes from conan he's been incredibly incredibly supportive of young comics and i think when we started to hear tbs he really wanted to really i guess swing for the fences and open up the gates to a lot of comics who may not be mainstream and also may not have gotten on other late night shows. And so it's certainly kept me busy. That's great. So, JP, you've been with the show since The Tonight Show. Yeah, that's been about about 10 years ago.

Cool. How do you what did you do before that? I I'm interested in how you learn to do this job where it's like, Oh yes, I can book comics on a late night TV show. Were you booking live shows prior to that? Or I was, uh, working for, you know, going between festivals and, uh, live performance shows, a bunch of talent shows, which I'm glad I'm not doing anymore. Um, I did the, the, I don't know if you remember that Star Search did make a resurgence in about 2003. Hosted by anyone? Anyone here?

Oh, man. Regis Philbin? No. Arsenio Hall. Oh, okay. Oh, wow. Yeah, it didn't last that long. They were trying to compete with American Idol.

Yeah. I think they were the comics had to do a minute and 40 set on national television in front of the Elder Judd was that Naomi? Which one was that Naomi or Wyonna? Miranda?

No She and Ben Stein would judge stand upup comedy and comics i felt after that i i owed about 20 comics uh a debt of gratitude and i need to find them better work elsewhere so so that's how this job they had to do a minute 40 minute 40 and uh and then be followed and actually i think they had to follow a child singer after you know and that's never good sounds like it's not a hot crowd not a hot crowd and uh i did that and then i worked for a number of years at hbo doing the comedy festivals in aspen um and then worked for montreal comedy festival and and actually the

last thing i did before i got here was working with ellen degeneres on her one of her tbs specials in vegas oh that that was the stand-up? She had stand-ups on? Various performers. I think one stand-up, Pink performed. There's probably some acrobatics. Mostly puppets. She danced. It is Vegas.

Yeah. But that was the last thing I was doing when I got the call. Oh, wow. About this. Oh, wow. That's a ton of experience. I'd say you were overqualified. Holy cow.

So I was wondering, how do you generally find comics for the show? Especially if it's people who are sort of more under the radar. Are you going to a lot of live comedy in L.A.? Do you see people online? It's a mix. There's a lot of, I mean, nowadays, and in the early days, it was all going out and just going into a room you'd never been before, an open mic. I bet you drank a lot. Yeah, I gained probably about 20 pounds in the first couple of years doing this job.

Yeah, because you have to drink at those things to make it fun. But then the problem is you book somebody thinking they're amazing. And then you're sober in front of your boss, seeing them on a late night stage, and it doesn't work as well. Oh, yeah. To drink minimum for our show. But that was a lot. There's a lot of going out to live shows. There's a lot of festivals.

You know, the big ones, Montreal, Edinburgh, and then Bridgetown used to be a really great festival. And Portland, that probably was my favorite place to go, is go up there. It's not a good festival anymore? Well, it's just they haven't I believe in May. It was teetering on not going forward. So I think unfortunately it may

not be going on anymore. But festivals and then I just get a lot of submissions, emails every day, links to videos. Oh, wow. So much of it. Yeah. I probably watch most of my most of the sets on my computer. Mm-hmm.

I would wonder about avoiding eye contact when you're... No, but when you're at a live club, do comics kind of... Do people know who you are? Do they zero in on you and then try to engage you with like, hi? It's not too bad. No, I mean, I've been around, I think long enough that I know a lot of the communities already. So it's usually your friendly conversation.

Right. There can be a couple here and there that may not be as pleasant because I haven't booked them. Right. Do people get belligerent and kind of in your face a little bit from time to time? There's been a couple. There's been a few instances of saying, why the hell haven't you booked me?

Comparing themselves to other people I've booked, saying that they're better. That's a surefire way to get booked somewhere. It's to insult your taste. Exactly. I'm always wondering, what do you think I'm doing? What's your end game here with this? Yeah, so there's a little bit of that. But for the most part, I mean, I love,

I try to get out and see as much live. I like to see them live, obviously, before booking for the show. But every once in a while, there'll be someone internationally who I just can't fly to like Sydney, Australia and see somebody or I can't get to London in time. And the set's fantastic. And I kind of go on my gut going, OK, well, I guess this will translate to the stage. Yeah, because that seems to be a big thing, that there are even emerging comedy markets like in India or in the Middle East, and it's like people who I think for a long time didn't have any access to a stage, a comedy stage. So have you had experiences where you've seen an international comic and wanted to fly them in?

Well, we had, I think recently, it was about a year ago, Ismo was on our show. Oh, yeah. He's a comedian from Finland. And the interesting story about him, really quickly, is just that he was the first submission I got when I joined here, when I got to The Tonight Show. Frank Smiley had passed along his DVD, said, we over in Finland shooting a remote and we got this DVD submission. Why don't you watch it? I took a look at it and it was it was pretty good. But he was doing stand up in his second language, which was English.

This was his first language. Right. And I actually asked, you know, asked him for to send me some more in the future. And I guess this was, you know, nine years later, he sent me this set and it was, I couldn't go to see him, but he luckily was touring in the US and was able to come by and tape and it was a fantastic set.

Nine years later. Was he literally out of mind kind of for that? Or did he keep in touch? He kept in touch. There were emails here and there every once in a while, but it was somebody that I didn't know if we'd ever have the chance to get him on.

Wow. And it just worked out. And sometimes I've had people that I've known on other shows, like say Star Search, that maybe 15 years later, booking them for this show, it's kind of a nice...

Yeah, it's nice to see them again. Well, and that's, I think, a nice it's a nice nice to see them again well and that's i think a nice message for everybody is you might not get it on the first time you submit but you know if you keep working at it which you should then eventually it can it can work out yeah i mean it's it's you're doing something that's i mean these are comedians who perform live regularly you know a number of times a week, multiple times a night. Yeah. And they're performing for audiences that are there to see stand-up comedy.

They're performing for audiences that have been drinking. They're in a room that really, I mean, sweetie, you can speak to this. It's very. Sure. It's very conducive to a good intimate performance. Then you bring them here. It's the middle of the day. They're here to see Conan and or the celebrity. And then suddenly you're like saying, hey, here's this person you've never heard of doing a five minute set you're not getting a chance to know

them and you know you've gotta hopefully this will go as well as it does in front of drunk people right it doesn't always work that way but you're trying to i always equate it to it's a different uh event at track and field it's like you're used to running you know uh if you're our set yeah you're used to running like you know, if you're hour set, yeah, you're used to running like the two mile and suddenly here we've got a 50 meter sprint. You've got to they're going to be analyzing every step that you take through from the first minute to minute five. But it cuts the

other way too. There are acts that kill in clubs, but on TV they're almost too much and it's kind of a cooler medium and some comedians do better on TV, they're almost too much, and it's kind of a cooler medium. And some comedians do better on television than they come across in clubs a lot of times. Yeah. Yeah, there's also not really the opportunity to do crowd work on our show.

So, I mean, some comics, that's where they really shine. It's tough. I mean, it's nice that there have been a few that have been able to interact with the audience. And I think that's been, when it's worked, it's worked really well. Crowd work is fascinating. I don't know if it's still the case, but the city of Boston, comic, no comic would do crowd work. It was almost like an unwritten rule. And there were clubs there.

If you came from New York, because all New York comics did crowd work, go to Boston. Like if you talk to the audience once, they'd be like, you don't do that. You don't do that in this club. And the crowd kind of knew that. Everyone was kind of like, what are you doing? You're breaking all the rules. It's uncomfortable. I kind of love how different, you probably notice this, there are almost different comedian personas by city.

Yeah. And a lot of it, I think, is based on the live audiences they get to develop in front of. Because some, like San Francisco, those audiences, they're almost like Broadway theater crowds where they're like, oh my God, this is, I can't believe I'm out at a comedy club. Whereas in New York they're just like, just staring at you or screaming at you. I think you mentioned San Francisco. I think there was a wave in the 90s

I noticed there was a lot more experimental comedians coming to San Francisco than out of New York or Boston or Chicago. Absolutely. That was absolutely the case. And a lot of times they'd be flown in for Letterman auditions, like a Catch Rising Star. And these acts that had developed in these really kind of pristine conditions would get thrown up in front of a crowd of drunk investment bankers and just hit the wall. And they just, they went back to San Francisco. Just, I mean, they were just stunned.

The audience does, people have different theories on audiences. There is a variation night to night. So, yes, there are certain nights where, and if you know who the comedian is going to be and how adventurous or experimental they are, and you can tell within the first two monologue jokes, oh, it's going to be rough for the comedian, or, oh, they're going to have a great set. Don't you think? Absolutely. Absolutely. There have been nights where I the comedian or, Oh, they're going to have a great set. Don't you think?

I absolutely. Absolutely. There, there've been nights where I've just gone, Oh boy, this is not the right time for them. Oh, that's going to happen,

but they're still there, like excited. And you don't want, I mean, you, you want to be careful about what, what you tell them. And so every once in a while,

I'll have to read whether, you know what I have to kind of figure out, is this the comic that you tell? This is not a good audience. You're really going to have to really hit these things hard. Or you're I have to kind of figure out, is this the comic that you tell this is not a good audience? You're really going to have to really hit these things hard or you're gonna have to like say, come up with a really good opening line to like win them over. Yeah. Or if you just, yeah, you've got to find that right balance because you don't want to get

in their head and tell them something that may just throw them off completely and make them panic. And, but you do also sometimes want to make sure they know what they're in for because they will make them out with their line that works every night their opener that just always kills and suddenly they get out there and it just thuds and they but you don't want them to so you may have to give that person a heads up that it's like be ready it's so hard because for comics if they know oh everyone else isn't doing well then it is very liberating in a way.

It's kind of like, oh, I mean, this is going to be rough. But that thought of like, oh, it's just me. They just hate me. It's like, oh, no, they hate everybody. And that kind of relaxes you, you know. But it is very hard. I used to do the warm up back in New York and Kona would be like, how are they? Every single night.

And I always had to, it was a judgment call. They'd have to be really bad for me to go, they're just off their assholes. But, you know, because otherwise it's like running out to a brick wall. They're great. Yeah. Like smashing the wall. And then suddenly he started out himself going,

well, Sweeney said they were amazing. I'd be home by then. Well, so you're the last, you're kind of the person that they connect with right before they go out. Is that, do you have a sort of process or routine for how you kind of psych them up for their thought? A prayer. Yeah. It really depends. I try to make them just remember that they've been doing this for decades, years, and they're used to this.

And this is no different. It's not a bigger audience. They perform for bigger audiences. And to try and not get overwhelmed by the fact that this is going to be broadcast and they're going to have to face their friends and their family afterwards if it doesn't go well. And just try to tell them that, hey, this is, you've tested these jokes, you know, they're great. Yeah. And just also don't rush and don't worry about the time cues.

The biggest thing is that they sometimes will see time cues. And unlike just getting one red light at a comedy club, you've got a stage manager going three minutes, two minutes, one minute, wrap it up. And I try and just tell them, listen, just forget that. If it goes long, it's on me. You'll figure it. We'll figure out a way to like, you know, make it fit into the show. But don't you bail on the set and panic.

And so that's usually the last thing I'm telling them before they go out there. Oh, that's interesting. I didn't know you kind of give them that little final chat. Usually. Yeah. I mean, I give them like, it depends on the person. Everybody, every personality is different. So I just try to write what I think. Right.

And a lot of them probably it's like a fighter in a corner. They're like hearing every 10th word. They're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, sure. Let's get this over with. Just put me on the face. Do you tell them play to the camera or do you play to the audience? Like it's a live show and let the camera take care of itself. Play the audience.

But if you've got a line or, or, or some sort of, I mean like maybe if you're playing a character, right. And that character is directing something to you, then maybe if it works, play it to can't relate to camera.

But other than that, really play the room and make sure you engage the room. Because if you look at comedy specials, rarely do you see anyone playing to the camera. I always try to treat it the same as you would a special, and also like you would treat a real room. Yeah. The red light can be

scary. Oh my god. The red light coming on, you know, there's five cameras. The tele light on the camera. And the tele light, right. The kill light. It is. Why red? Maybe if it was a softer... It's like a sniper's laser. Like a nice turquoise blue.

Magenta, maybe? Yes, it'd be a little more relaxing. But it's red! It's angry! It's code nine! Do you, JP, have any advice for someone out there who does stand-up, who wants to get on late night and doesn't have any idea kind of how to make that happen. Well, I, I, what I would do is just keep in mind that four and a half to

five minutes is a very short period of time. So really there's a lot of weight put on every bit, every joke. So I am always looking for something that's someone that's unique. Someone that has something is something to say that has been said 10,000 times. Obviously it's not gonna be the first time you've heard every joke, but you're saying it in a different way from other people. Um, there are tried and well tried bits and premises that I would avoid. Um, it's often tough to kind of open your set with one of those because you may lose the audience right away. So it's really about trying something, you know, going with something that's more unique. You really want to hit the ground with a really killer opener. And if you can really end your set

with a mic drop, if you can, just find that line that the audience applause ends the set for you. That really you're not having to go. That's it. That's all I've got. And you can commercial. Yeah. Tony for commercial. Yeah. That's that's really my my advice for for comics.

Just, you know, if a bit works in a 20 minute set, it may not work in a five minute. Right. Right. So that's its own beast is having a five minute it's very different it is crafted yeah i mean while it's not like maybe true stand-up comedy because it's not what you see in a stand-up club it's your sort of business card your calling card your invitation for people to come see you live and you know maybe follow you if you host a podcast or if you've got a special, download that.

That's great. Yeah. And Moses said his appearance on the show really helped him. Yeah. As a calling card. You just used that term. He said he started getting much better bookings after that. Yeah.

That's all I can wish for. That's like, that makes me happier than anything else, really. If someone comes off and says, you know what, someone saw this and booked me for another gig, that's the best. Yeah. That yeah that's great well this is so informative thank you thank you that sounded like a really boring way to wrap things up it actually was guys assholes thanks jp absolutely thanks guys thank you appreciate it wow yeah so that was a great exclusive that was great piece of advice for aspiring comics out there. I hope thousands of people contact JP to be on the show now.

Yeah. I think we've done a great service. And you can take a selfie with him. No questions asked. That's it for this week's show. Oh, wow. It's over already. Can you believe it?

That's crazy. What if I'm so fast? That's insane. Now what do we do? I don't know. I guess we have to go back to work. One more thing before we go. Yeah.

Moses Storm brought a really amazing home video of sorts. Yes. It's hard to describe that video, but it does involve Conan. It does. And it's real. It was something he recorded as a youth. Yes. And if you're a fan of Conan's old late night show, you'll love this clip.

So go to teamcoco.com to watch that. Or there's also a link in the show notes if you're lazy. Oh, and hey, this is new. If you want to contact us and you have a question or there's something you'd like to hear discussed on the show. You can do that now. We have a phone number. It's 323-209-5303 and an email insideconanpod at gmail.com. I can't believe they're using my home phone number for this. No one asked me.

So call Sweeney at any time of the night. He wants to hear from you. I do. Wait, Sweeney at any time of the night. He wants to hear from you. I do. Wait, Sweeney. Yeah. There's a breaking scandal that's taking place currently on, check your email. Let's see. We have this ongoing issue where the third floor complains.

We're on the third floor. The writers are on the third floor. And Conan and Jeff and the producers are on the second floor. The elites. The elites. The elites. And they get much better snacks. They get better everything. And other perks.

In their kitchen. Yeah. And somebody just sent an email, Levi, one of our writers. One of our writers. Wow. It perfectly encapsulates the difference between the third floor and the second floor. It's fantastic. This is a breaking scandal.

And the second floor has Coke Zero. Right. And the third floor has, I think it's Bond's Signature Select. I don't know. Zero calorie cola soda. I think this soda comes from Albania. And Jeff Ross, our executive producer, has replied to this shot across the bow with, that's unacceptable. And I don't know whether he's talking about Levi criticizing the second floor or the soda disparity.

I think when we get back to the office, Levi could be dead. Murderer. So this is, we're going to share that photo with you guys so that you can see that we're not making this up. Yes, check it out. They're going to try to gaslight us into thinking that you can see that we're not making this up. Yes, check it out. They're going to try to gaslight us into thinking that we're crazy, but we're not crazy. When you see the conditions we are operating under on the third floor, you might just want to send us money. Yeah. I think.

At least contact the Department of Labor on our behalf. Yes, please. Los Angeles Department of Labor. Thank you. And thanks for listening. Thank you for listening. Talk to you next week. We like you.

Inside Conan, an important Hollywood podcast, is hosted by Mike Sweeney and me, Jesse Gaskell. Produced by Julia Smith and Kevin Bartelt. Engineered by Will Becton and Sam Kiefer. Mixed by Ryan Connor. Supervising producer is Aaron Blair. Executive produced by Adam Sachs and Jeff Ross at Team Coco. And Colin Anderson. And Chris Bannon at Earwolf.

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