Inside of You with Michael Rosenbaum - HELEN SLATER: Pressure of Supergirl, Christopher Reeve Training, Mythology & Smallville Memories

Episode Date: August 8, 2023

Helen Slater (Supergirl, The Legend of Billie Jean) joins us this week to talk about her experience being thrust into the iconic role of Supergirl at 18 years old and the many different pressures and difficulties that came along with it. Helen was so open this week - she gets candid about her desire to act and the deep fulfillment that she receives in studying mythology. We also talk about her deep bond with Helen Hunt, the hurdle she had to cross to get her parents’ acceptance for acting, and memories of iconic scenes while appearing in Smallville. Thank you to our sponsors: ❤️ Betterhelp: https://betterhelp.com/inside 🍽️ Factor: factormeals.com/inside50 🟠 Discover: https://discvr.co/3Cnb1V8 __________________________________________________ 💖 Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/insideofyou 👕 Inside Of You Merch: https://store.insideofyoupodcast.com/ __________________________________________________ Watch or listen to more episodes! 📺 https://www.insideofyoupodcast.com/show __________________________________________________ Follow us online! 📸 Instagram: https://instagram.com/insideofyoupodcast/ 🤣 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@insideofyou_podcast 📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/insideofyoupodcast/ 🐦 Twitter: https://twitter.com/insideofyoupod 🌐 Website: https://www.insideofyoupodcast.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Bryce. Bryce has done a couple of talk film episodes. She's now on an Inside You intro episode because Ryan is on a camping trip with his dad. Ryan's on a camping trip with his father. Something I would never do with my father. Yeah. A lot going on, man. Just briefly, I want to thank you for listening.

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Subscribe. And if you want to join Patreon to help the show, go to patreon.com slash inside of you. P-A-T-R-E-O-N-com slash inside of you. really helps the show and without the patrons i i wouldn't be here also the uh we got the inside of you online store with tons of cool merch and tumblers i just got these new inside of you jackets uh little sweat zip ups they're they're dope they're selling out so get one and uh cool new tumblers and uh autograph pictures and scripts and blah blah blah and uh yeah it's a lot of fun i'll be in salt lake city dc and uh road island in september with tom we're going to do

an evening with Michael and Tom. We're going to do a lot of stuff, sign pictures, all that. I'm on the cameo and the inside of you online store cool merch. I said, my band, sunspin.com. We're selling vinals. They just came out. Vinals. There's only 99 signed by me and Rob and numbered.

Love the support. This didn't do 100. You did 99? 99 because we kept one. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Actually, 98 because we kept one each. Gotcha.

Actually 97 because I gave my mom one. There's only 97. 96, actually, I gave Tom one. It's only 90 years. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But we appreciate it. We worked really hard on the album, and we're really proud of it, and I think you'll be surprised.

So have a listen, if you will, Sunspin. We're on Spotify, we're everywhere else, and we're playing music at the end of every month on stage.com. You can get tickets and listen to us. That would mean the world to me. Our guest today is Helen Slater. She's been in so many things, but she has so many fantastic stories about Supergirl and working with Christopher Reeve and just what did you like about this podcast I like that she was open about

her experience early she because she came into supergo at like what 18 years old or something so she got thrown into the limelight super early oh I would have fallen apart and at a different age right there's no social media or anything so it's really interesting hearing that perspective and then also her her fascination and her interest in education yeah and I think it's like mythology that she's really into she's not what you would think from super yeah she's cool she's really smart and also on top of it what's amazing is she talks those are my dogs but she talks about helen hunt her best friend and helen hunt you know she tells helen like i saw some some video of a movie i did and she's like helen i look so old and wrinkly

and she was like when she saw footage and helen looked at her and said sweetheart we're dying which is so profound and funny but we're dying we're all dying we're all getting old we're all aging when we're born we're just aging until we end up dying so i thought that was kind of beautiful and i apologize for my dogs but i don't because it's a puppy and all right without further ado let's just get into it let's get inside of helen slater it's my point of you you're listening to inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum. Inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum was not recorded in front of a live studio audience. Hey folks, wanted to highlight something important before today's episode.

In case you weren't aware, myself and many of the guests are on strike alongside SAG after and WGA. Today's episode, and any we air before the strike ends, were recorded before it began. So this is just a heads up in relation to some for the topics we may discuss. If you want more info on the strike, visit sag afterstrike.org. Now let's get into it. I mean, I just graduated a myth program. So of course, the images and the icons in this room are totally fascinating to me. Are they just like? you just collect what you want or is there reason is there things that i think there's something that has to do with nostalgia from a certain time period of just like going oh my gosh i remember this

moment with my friend dave bookert watching return of the living dead in louisville in his basement or i remember my mom making me watch this movie with her right and being scared or the first time i saw the evil dad like i always was a big horror movie fan i've talked about this But like, it's funny because people assume since I played Lex Luthor, I was the Flash, I'm in the Guardians of the Galaxy World that, oh, I'm big in Marvel and DC, I know nothing. Yeah. I had that about the D.C. world when I did Supergirl. Did you know nothing? Nothing.

Did you have to look into it? You're like, no, I'm not doing that. Well, I was 18 when I got the part and we had much less access. I mean, I love Superman. That's a kid. That's good. Have we started? Oh, yeah. We just talk. It's just kind of like, this is like, you know, I like it

when it's just like sort of fly on the wall. I want people to feel like they're a fly in the wall and we're just two people talking. Good. You know what I mean? Now, you were just talking about you're getting a degree, your master's, and what? My PhD. I got my master's last. Oh, so masters, this is what I know. Masters comes before PhD. Right. Okay. So it's bachelor or, you know, whatever, what is it? It took me 13 years to get my bachelor's degree because I, started working right out of Performing Arts High School, the Fame High School in Manhattan. I just, boom, got Supergirl that September after I graduated in June in 1982. So, and everything was about, I come from a family where education is everything.

And I always just had this kind of shame wound around education. Really? It just was like, oof, my mom went back to law school at 42, my brother's an attorney, my stepmothers, the first woman dean of students at Princeton, my stepsisters went to Yale. And I mean, just like education is everything. So it was always there. And then I just wasn't working as much and had the time to do it and slowly made my way through Valley College right near in the valley and got the AA and then graduated from Antioch and then went to Pacifica Graduate Institute in their myth program, which is incredible. This is a big shout out for, well,

education, but that program. Myth, myth, mythological, you think of like, like, what, the Lottnus monster and things? Like, I mean, are we thinking, like, mythological? Is that what that is? I mean, sure, that comes from, I don't know the full history of that myth, but Greek and Roman myth. And then world mythology, Norse, African mythology, Egyptian. We covered as much as you can. For sure, we read the Odyssey and the Iliad and Clytemestra.

For sure, she was not very nice to Agamemnon. No, she was not very nice. I remember reading those things in college and they were interesting. And I wrote an album called The Myths of Ancient Greece before I even went to school that took like my six favorite ones, Narcissus and Echo and Psyche and Eros and Demeter and Persephone and a couple of others and turned them into like mini musicals because that's what I had done at Performing Arts High School. That was kind of my...

And you have an album of that. What's it called? The Myths of Ancient Greece. The myths of ancient Greece. And you think, like, who, like, I'm not, this isn't a knock. This is like, what I love is that you do what you want to do. This is my passion, whether or not people really listen to it. I don't think is really your.

At some point, I think we all have that kind of pivot of like, I actually want, I'm only here so briefly, like, how do I bring meaning to this life? And how do you navigate that if the world's not reflecting it back? Do you keep going with that thing that's inside? Yeah. I battle that, that thought of like, you know, always appeasing, always pleasing, always, you know, a lot of times we live our lives because, you know, we want to make other people happy most of the circumstances that we're in, situations that we're in.

So I think you get to a certain age, hopefully, where you say, all right, stop. Why are you doing this? Are you doing this for you? Are you doing it for some sort of reciprocated, you know, attention? Is it, would it? So you have to really. Beautiful. And I am working on that.

I think I'm getting a lot better. I'm sort of like going, hey, you know, not comparing myself to others as much. Like I have a problem, not a problem, but I envy those people who I perceive as having their shit together. I don't, I like them, but I'm sort of, I look at them like, God, why can't that be me? Why? And I look at you like that because. Yeah, I just feel like, look at you, you've been married to the same person since, what, 89? Mm-hmm.

So that's what, 30? I think we have, I can't, I think it's third, I don't know. Well, it's a while. It's coming up to 33 or 34. And every time I've met you, you're just so, like, you're a straight shooter, but you're very, almost seem like you're just in a constant state of meditation. Oh. In a good way. That's so, that's, I will take that one.

My dissertation is around has that in it. I'm looking at refuge practice in myth and where we see these archetypal images of refuge in all myth, in all these different myths, how that's such a key piece, kind of what we were just talking about earlier, which is going to get cut from this conversation, but the importance of kind of collecting oneself and settling and making sure we're going to the ocean or hiking the mountain or doing those things that rest the mind so that the other stuff can come through. and we can't get to it unless we do sort of settle back, search out those, or those places search us out. Sometimes we don't have to be like doing it. It comes to us, you know. But I feel like you, you've been like this for quite some time. There's a, I'm not saying you're perfect because you're going to tell me you're not.

I'm a hundred percent. We can guarantee. Of course. Of course. But you feel like you, I feel like you have a real grasp on things that are very important, And things that I don't think I have a grasp on, which are career, family and love, you know, passions, just sort of purpose, purpose. I don't think anyone gets out of feeling same old shitty self, as Pema Chodra, and the Buddhist teacher says, that feeling of same old shitty self. Well, someone who is once talking to her, that like we have this, we do have self-denigration in built-in, which I do too, for sure.

I mean, that is something you, certainly writing a dissertation right now, the doubt just kind of sits on the shoulder. And then there are moments where there's so much trust like it's okay. Then there is that discursive, like, you're not going to get this right. That we all have. We're always battling with ourselves. I mean, from the Buddhist point of view, you know, part in the expression, I'm not a professional Buddhist, but I do study it and it's in my dissertation. It's about becoming friends with or like becoming intimate with the thing that's just, you know, you just want as far away as possible from yourself. Like there's no way I'm accepting that part of myself. And like the Buddhist view would be not a problem. Like if you open to it and you take a seat right in it, it actually shifts and changes and never stays as that one concrete, jealous person, raging person, small-minded, you know. It's always moving through. Yeah.

Yeah. I mean, that's the Buddhist. No, no, it's good. It's, uh, huh, just, it's making me think right now. You're making me think. What are you thinking about, Michael? No, I'm not going to get into it, but it's, it's just like, uh, you know, sometimes my mind goes a certain place when I hear something that's impactful or why I

say certain things or why I do certain things or act certain ways. And then hearing you, I, I guess subconsciously it responds or makes me think of things that I do that I'm like, huh, I don't know if that's healthier. I don't know if that I should be doing that. maybe, you know, I should be more positive in certain things. I tend to go down sort of a negative place a lot. Now, it's not a negative place. I'm fun to be around, Ryan, when you say?

I think he's fun to be around. It's not like I'm a drag, but I definitely, you know, feel like I can go down that place where it's like, ah, this person, this, and that, that, that, blah, blah, instead of just sort of like not spending so much time in that area because it's unhealthy. You know, not to be so Jewish with you. but because I'm a born Jewish person. Yes. There's this, have you heard this phrase about Lush and Hura?

Have you ever heard that in the Jewish? I know Kunahera. Kunaherr is like keep the, so Lush and Herre is like, in the Orthodox Jewish circles, sometimes let's say someone's just had a difficult pregnancy, a birth, or something's happened to a family. Lush and her, the community might get together and practice just not gossiping, saying things out loud that are negative,

as an offering for healing that person and lush and her to refrain from saying the thing out loud like it's a really good like we have a couple of good things in our tradition yeah that's one of them yeah i mean that's yeah inside of you is brought to you by quince i love quince ryan i've told you this before i got this awesome sixty dollar cashmere sweater i wear it religiously you can get all sorts of amazing, amazing clothing for such reasonable prices. Look, cooler temps are rolling in. And as always, Quince is where I'm turning for fall staples that actually last. From cashmere to denim to boots, the quality holds up and the price still blows me away. Quince has the kind of fall staples you'll wear nonstop, like super soft, 100% Mongolian cashmere sweaters starting at just

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Don't wait. Download the Rocket Money app today and tell them you heard about them from my show inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum. Rocket Money. Because sometimes just giving voice to it constantly can be the bummer. Like saying out loud to the person

what we don't like about things or always that can be the thing that concretizes it or makes it worse. So you're practicing refraining, then you're like, all right, we're just going to take a pass on that. Taking a knock out of somebody, taking a bite out of somebody.

doing a yeah yeah it has a good source material no I agree with you I think yeah yeah I'm not gonna you're gonna be negative no it wasn't a negative thing it was just I feel like come on let's argue this is Jewish of us no I just it's not arguing I believe what you're saying um I just like I never talk politics on the show but I think that it's just like I feel like it's unfortunate that you know in the last X amount of years or whatever that we can't have an open forum about things in fact It's probably been there for longer than just a few years. I mean, it's been, it's sort of like, you know. What do you make of that?

I mean, isn't it crazy? We can't even really be in the same room. They're my husband, my best friend, I have really good friends. They are, there is not two sides. There is what is right and what is wrong. And I have people on the other side that feel the same way, too. I mean, it is like cuckoo bird. Well, it's just like, can I even have any conversations?

And every time you think of saying something, you're like, um, I should, it's, that's what upsets to me is that I'm stopping myself from saying 80% of what I, I think right now, this is just my two cent opinion. It will pass. It'll, I think we could do with a little, like, let's find the common ground and not just do the dump or do the, and yet at the same time, we're in this movement with Black Lives Matters and Me Too, where to be able to call out things when you see it, say it, when you, you know, that's really important too.

So I guess we're all. It is. And I can speak to you as like a soul sister as being white and being raised with incredible privilege. We've been in such a soup that we, it's sort of like such a learning curve to even take in these other ideas, take them into heart and then know how to proceed. Like I don't know anyone that's getting it right. I'll just say this.

I don't think it was fair. for so many years, for black people, Hispanics, people of color to be typecast or stereotyped and cast always as this and this and this for so long and not being given the opportunities that privileged white people have had. And I hate that, you know, old Hollywood that we used to play, you know, an Asian character when we weren't Asian. And there was a lot of terrible, horrible things. So I don't mind at all. I'm like, I step back and go, hey, you guys deserve everything. Like, you, you deserve to be respected and paid attention to. So that's not, I don't, that's, I don't have any issues with that. I think my issues are more with just like, um, you say

something and it's, you don't mean to be mean or you don't mean to be ignorant or you don't mean and you're a lamb bastard by certain things. Right. There's just not an educational sort of like, I think because as, as a child, I was sort of. of um no one had patience with me i was sort of a d all over the place and i wasn't you know i didn't get affection or love at home so you know when i get like somebody yells at me or tells me i you know i don't like that yeah i don't like to be told you're dumb you're stupid you can't it's it's a bigger thing so i guess it just used to be sort of an open forum where you kind of didn't worry about what you said too much and now you have to be and it's good to be

empathetic. I think it's good to be, I mean, the way Rob, my husband talks about it is like it's sort of our turn a little bit just to be more listening. And that's not an easy thing to develop if we're used to being able to just say how we feel or I don't like that or, you know, have like it's okay to just listen for a little while. Just to sort of balance it. And that doesn't come easy. No, it doesn't. But I think that's the most important thing there is. is listening. Right. I mean, in life, that's the number one thing.

Listen. Yeah. Learn. Understand. I mean, in acting 101, the number one thing they teach you is listen. Right. Any kind of improv. Listen.

Right. Look, you have had an awesome career and you've done so many things and you've worked with so many great people. I know you went to performing arts high school. I know you did all these things. Were your parents behind that because they weren't, you didn't have actors in your family. No. My parents were divorced.

My dad was an executive in public television down in D.C. My mom was up in New York City. But she really came out of that whole women's movement when Betty Friedan wrote the feminine mystique and women burned their bras and were like, I am not staying in a marriage where I don't, you know. She was kind of part of that. And when I lived in Great Neck Long Island, I was surrounded in that soup before we moved to Manhattan. of women of divorced, Great Neck was, yeah, really unusual enclave of single women with daughters, really bright, brilliant women kind of finding their way through that period. So my mom's thing more was almost so much of you can do anything you want, yeah.

Was it hard? When did your father? I was eight. Yeah, divorce is hard. It was. I don't know anyone. like abandonment issues even like um did you ever notice that you know it's funny because i'm such i'm a mythologist now i i have certain images that come to mind like my brother and i were very young

i'm younger my brother's two and a half years older but from the time we were really little eight nine years old we were taking the subway and then the train sometimes the bus from new york to dc to visit my dad on the weekends without any parental help that's four hours isn't it four and a half hours. So I have like a Hansel and Gretel thing like brother and me like in Penn Station or in, yeah, that kind of thing. But sure, that stuff is a lifetime of working through of, yeah, I don't know. And you know, I'm thinking, I don't know if you have this, but contemporary friends, I'm sure you have friends that have gone through divorce and seeing now from the parental point of view, just the heartbreak of nobody wants to go through that, nobody wants to put their kids through

that. They would never choose to cause that kind of. It's funny that it's almost like a facet of a diamond, the different, yeah. Are your parents still with you? My dad passed away from COVID. Are you serious? Yeah, that was pretty awful. No, how old? He was 86, almost 87.

But he was in perfect health before that? Not perfect health. I mean, 87, you're going to have things. Was he 86 or 87? Let's say 86. April of 2020. So it was right when it was all hitting and, yeah, yeah. My mom's still here.

She's still living in the same apartment on 86th Street in York Avenue. And she's this very, she's a political activist for nuclear disarmament and writes on it and travels, used to travel quite a lot and speak on peace. Well, shout about peace as activists tend to do. Wow, yeah, absolutely. I mean, during Kobe when your father passed, were you even allowed to go to a funeral? Nothing. We had nothing. get to celebrate his life or do anything. Last summer, not this past summer, the summer before

we all went to Maine where we would meet right over the years. And my very close step family, just the immediate family, we had a little memorial up on the island. But the day he died, I mean, you hear, it's so interesting hearing when people die, like what happens when they, so my brother figured out, because it was COVID, how to get an iPad in the hospital room, room filming him. So this is the day he passes away. It was me and my brother on Zoom with him and my stepmother. And we're just chit-chatting. I mean, just tells you like when the body is ready to go. And we're talking about being in Maine. And I hold up Trader Joe's mango slices. And I'm just saying on the Zoom call with my dad in one frame and my brother and my stepmom,

I'm like, I don't know. These Trader Joe mango slices are getting me through. COVID. I don't know what it is. They're just so delicious and chit-chatting. And then we started talking about being on the island on Bustin's Maine and chit-chat, chit-chat. And I look at my father's frame and I'm like, I don't think dad's breathing. And because it was COVID, we had to call, my brother had to call the hospital to get a nurse to go into the room to see if he had passed away. So it took like 15, 20 minutes until the nurse comes in, then she couldn't tell us because you have to have a doctor she says can you please just hold a minute she goes to get the doctor then the doctor comes in i mean it was wild but the point being what i know i mean why wouldn't if you

stop breathing doesn't shouldn't there be like beep beep beep beep beep beep something no but that's a good point no one brought that up but more what i think the bigger question is is that kind of relaxed feeling chit chatting about main talking about mango slices he knew like the closest people in his and And then I felt like he just thought I can go. Yeah. I was, I mean, yeah, I'm talking about the positive, but there was a lot of heart. You were a pretty emotional. Oh, at one point, my rob just, like, scrape me off the floor and, like, took me, this is like the week.

Oh, when he first went in because of COVID, drove me up to Malibu, and we brought beach chairs and sat along the, because you're just, you're not in your right mind. You couldn't get on a plane, and I didn't get on a plane, so. Yeah, you know, what's crazy is I was incredibly close with my grandfather, Irv was my, I mean, he was my joy, and my grandmother, who's still with us. And he had Alzheimer's, so I slowly watched him deteriorate. So I was losing a piece of him. Yes, my dad had some dementia too, and I was losing him before COVID. That's such a hard one. Isn't it?

It's so hard. And I felt like I still, I still, to this day, think I haven't really mourned him. And I think about him all the time. And sometimes I think about, gosh, it was so important to your light in your life. I mean, I talked about him endlessly to my friends, to people, to everybody knew how much I loved. He raised you or just as a... No, but like he was just a great role model and he was always there for me. And like, you know, I'd stay months with them during the summer.

And he, you know, when I learned my parmitsvah, I learned it phonetically. like they wrote it out phonetically and I memorized the whole thing and he would help you run it and like he was just I can go on about him forever I would make endless videos I interviewed him constantly like just I don't know I just yeah crazy about him and even to this day I think why why are you not just more why aren't you more upset why aren't you what is it that you have you not let go but you have like I don't when did he pass away a couple years ago oh so it's new During the time of COVID or before COVID? It was before COVID, right before COVID, which I think he decided somehow subconsciously.

But no, I don't know what it is, but maybe it was because it was years of losing him where the last year or so, it wasn't even him. Yeah. It was like, hey, Mike, where are we going? But you know, what's weird is I wouldn't see him for some months. Yeah. And then I come back to Florida and visit. And I was with my dad and my grandmother. And he didn't remember anybody's name at this point.

And I walked into the place where he was. He was staying at this nice place they had for him with other people with, you know, mental. Yeah. Whatever. Memory care. Memory care. And he was, I walked in and he's on this chair and he's sleeping. And I just go, Erf!

I just yelled at him. And he, I'm telling you, I don't know what it was. But he didn't miss a beat. He just goes, Mike! And I'm telling you my eyes, well. welled up and my grandmother looked my grandmother just looked shocked like yeah he just hears my voice and pops up and it was yeah I mean look death is not for the faint of heart and growing old is not for the faint of heart and um inside you is brought to you by rocket money if you want to save

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You know, that sucks that you have to deal with it. I mean, look, there's always good qualities. I say to my grandmother, I mean, look how many years you were married. Look how many years you had him. She goes, I know, I'm grateful. Yeah. But that doesn't, you know, it's still, it's still not. You want him around forever, but that just doesn't happen.

People, everyone dies. I try to think about that. We all are going to die. We do, Michael. It just happens. And it's hard. It's like hard to think about that stuff. But anyway, so your parents.

I want to offer you something, like when you're saying, like, I don't know if I haven't grieved him or having something. I don't know if he had favorite. things to do or anything like that but let's say like what's one thing you just would say like this is him this was him like he loved a black cherry soda from you know what i do i did not even notice this but since he's passed i i'm just real have this having this realization okay this is crazy the two things that he loved more than he loved his family more than anything that was it or tennis and golf perfect and i've been playing them since he passed

every day, every week. So beautiful. So one thing you might just want to add for fun, like even if it's woo-woo, you can say Helen Slater, this is so dumb woo-woo, but okay, when you go to tea off or go to do your, just say like, I dedicate this to you or this is to you for you. This is my offering, wherever you are, because God knows what you gave me was just like the gift. And you just kind of make it like, that's like a way to keep it.

I think that's awesome. I'm going to do that. You know, I just remember. Don't forget the dumb woo-woo, Helen Slater, so dumb. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But he was just so, you know, we all have that person in our lives. We hope that just, you know, he'd take me golfing. And he was just like, I just love being around this guy.

He was so funny. Yeah. He would be like, Jesus, what the hell you're doing your shithead to himself? And he would get so hard. Oh, he'd say that to himself? Oh, yeah, to himself. And then he'd go, he's like, oh, that's a good hit, Mike. I don't know how you do that.

That's, you got natural ability. Like, he would just make you feel. feel good. He was always such a good grandfather. Oh, he'd send me letters and pictures. Do you know, I have to tell you one of the best things, my dad's long time, she was a secretary, executive assistant, she told me after my dad died, gave me this great thing of like, you can still talk to him. And I've had, because I hike every morning, I've had times on that mountain where I'm just talked to my dad. He was so good at like investments and that kind. And sometimes I'm like, dad what do i do like how do i but it's in a way it's fun you weirdly summon them like to just say

even like what you're saying when you're feeling that thing of just like man i just feel so shitty like you know irv keep that spirit alive you can say to him irv like what the heck like what's the next thing you know i swear to god i do this too i do that with him i'll go and i hear his voice going you know he'll say things like about death I remember having this conversation. He was, like, old and he was like, I remember, I don't know how it started, but we're in the car. And he goes, I don't know, look, Mike, this is, this is what happens. We die.

And it was very basic. But he says, he says, look, I have lived a great life. I got to experience my grandson. Beautiful. I got to have, you know, this family. Family is the best thing you can have. And he says, but. this is just the way it goes and you have to accept it you have to the way he was he was saying it to me like I was a really little like a little child but I needed to hear it like that yeah and um like not a problem and I do hear his voice it resonates with me at certain moments in my life where I hear him say what are you gonna do this is yeah this is it yeah all right get kicked in the ass you know but whatever all right but back to you all right so um all right so um all right so

you're acting and you know what so what was it like when you first started getting involved in like you know you know acting I guess for your parents who weren't doing something like that and they were like your mom was an activist like what what did they how did they feel about that they were super supportive really supportive and I had that dumb luck of working right away and we weren't allowed to work in high school but we did you know Erica Gimple was in my class and Keisha Lewis and Lisa Vidal they we all have worked Catherine to Prune since being in school. But we would do little things like commercials. Erica played Coco and the TV series fame. And so we, that was a big exception. But we had a taste of what it was to audition,

even though we were in high school. And so it wasn't like, the pump was getting primed by the time I said to my parents, I want to take a year off before going to college and just see if I can get work. Yeah. When did you, were they ever like, you know, it's that thing where your parents really, truly, don't believe that you're going to become a famous actress. I don't know how they would. It's such a hard, difficult. It's like you won the lottery. I will say this, though.

My dad, 100% yes. My mom, like one of her shining qualities, is just this crazy enthusiasm for what you love. Like, she just has that. She's also rough. We've had head bumping for many years. She's very volatile personality. But in that lane of just like, do it. Why not?

Why not you? She really had that enthusiasm. That's nice because, you know, I think it finally happened for, you know, my parents. It took a long time. It was like, wait, you're doing independent movie. That's not a real movie. Is it not in theaters? No, it's not.

Well, then it's not real. Who's in it? Well, there's no big actors in it. Well, how can it be a movie? What did your parents do? What do they do? My dad worked for a pharmaceutical company and my mother, although she did a repertory theater when she was younger, and she always wanted to be famous and actress, but she interviewed,

you know, people like in a small town and, you know, people involved with sports, professionals and things like that. And, you know, she always wanted to have the attention. But I don't think that they ever really thought that I would amount to anything. I don't think, in fact, nobody did. Really. And this is, this goes back to. my grandfather and my grandmother. I saw like my my grandfather's book is old, what do you call it,

a diary and big word. And he, um, he said something like, I was like, and I can't believe it. I read a T. Ryan, remember? It's like, I can't believe, you know, my grandson, Michael went on to be an actor and, you know, doing this show. And it was just like the doubt. You could sense the doubt. but I understand that it's not like everybody's going to be like yes you're the most unpopular kid in the school and the smallest kid in the school and you're from this small town and you're going to be famous

there's nothing it just like doesn't make sense and a lot of people think they're going to do that and they don't and I was fortunate enough to get out of there and do something but to have the support and have the love that you had to go do that

certainly I can tell you from experience helps a lot that is something that you know I think profoundly helps your confidence and your sort of not giving up hope and sort of like I'm doing the right thing yeah that was lucky for that that part was nice was not the that wasn't the hurdle those weren't that wasn't their support was not what was the hurdle you know I think for women mothers and daughters just mythically for a daughter to individuate and separate from the mother is It's going to incur lots of challenges. It just is. I'm not a mini her. My daughter's not a mini me. And when you see that, that it really is like, oh, that is a separate, really separate being.

We have different, we're just different kind of, it's going to cause. Triction. I think so. I mean, my mom's always been on this enlightenment path doing the S training and doing course in miracles along with her brilliant brain. but that can't replace the actual what happens in the dynamic between two people. People unfold at different paces. You can't make somebody go at your pace and that ability to really do that deep listening

and respect that, you know, I think it's a very, very challenging, super hard. Yeah, that's interesting. So, yeah, so there was some friction that you couldn't really expect. Just because you weren't alike and maybe she wanted you to kind of sort of inadvertently following her steps up in a way. You know, it'd be interesting if someone does a study or dissertation on this, but those women of my mother's generation that were like, hey, we are liberated. You can do whatever you want.

You are free. And then the daughters of that generation going like, I'm not quite so sure what freedom means to me because I've only been raised in a soup if you can do anything. There's no, they had to push against immigrant parents and or that kind of Betty Friedan, the sort of what marriage is, that kind of the conditioning of being raised in the 50s and then having us in the 60s like how we, so our individuating from that was, and it was unusual. We had to find it on our own terms what our separation was going to look like because it certainly wasn't going to be, we're going to be free because all they were saying is go be free. be, you know. Yeah. So what I gather from that is, and maybe this, I missed the point completely. No. But I'm thinking that your mother faced so much adversity and so many hardships. And now she's like, and you're free. And there's, it's twofold. It's like one, you know, where's your struggle,

young lady, without saying it? And B, you're like, I don't have to struggle as much as you did. I don't think she, I think it was more like, we did the hard work. Go fly. Go be free. But it turns out that psychologically, from a Jungian point of view or depth psychological point of view, nobody gets out of these initiations, these threshold moments, the challenges, the things that set us back, that move us, you know. I got you. That was kind of the sham of the 70s self-actualization movement.

You're going to awaken in a weekend, and then you're done. Yeah. You trip a little bit. You know, and that's just your belief. And you have jargon to replace actual depth work, you know, that kind of thing. I can't believe you were 18 when you did Supergirl. Yeah. You were 18 years old.

Yeah. I turned 19 when I was filming. And Jeannot Schwartz directed that. Yes, short. Who directed a lot of Smallville episodes. He did. Many. Oh, yeah.

We love him. Michael, Michael. Please, please, be quiet. Please, I have to get through the day. This little French guy. who is a great director, he still directs. Yeah. He's like in his 80s.

It's great. I think, and he's still going. Do you remember the feeling you got when you got this larger than life? I mean, this is at the time a $35 million movie, the budget. I mean, a lot of big people are in this movie. They have a clip because they were filming when they told me that I got the part. I was at Pinewood Studios. There's a clip of you reacting?

There's a documentary on the making of Supergirl. and you see me walking into the room with the Salkins and Timothy Burrell and the cameras on and they're like, you know, thank you for coming and bup, bu, and you got the part, you know. Did your eyes light up? Oh, I start crying. Like, I just, I, you know, my whole life changed. Your whole life changed. Like, massive, massively changed.

How many times did you test for this? I went in, Lynn Stallmaster was casting. I don't know if it was once or twice. And then the screen test was the big thing where they flew me to London. And I don't know who else or how many other people. That might be in the documentary, but I just haven't seen it in so many years. Were you intimidated? Were you nervous around big stars like Faye Dunaway or Peter O'Toole?

My singular memory of just the, I mean, so many years ago. It's 40 years ago. Is it? 41 years ago, yeah. They really did it very. smartly, if I'm speaking correctly. So Alv joined, who trained, Chris Reeve, trained me. So when I flew to London, I was by myself. I had no chaperone or anything like that. But I trained for four months, just gaining 15, 20 pounds, weight training, trampolining, horseback riding, fencing,

every possible swimming three times a week. I was in such a rig of running at the back lot of Pinewood Studios. And I met one of my dear friends who was my stunt up. Tracy Edden, now Tracy Michaels. So my point is it really grew, you know, I was in London in this cocoon. So by the time it came to meeting Peter O'Toole or meeting Faye Dunaway or I was in such a, I felt like I was the moss that was attached to the whole thing. Like it was intimidating and so prepared. Like it wasn't just coming like now, you know what it's like.

You get apart and you have like three days or something. And you're just trying to get those six pages of dialogue memorized. Yeah. It's so not a way to work. Look, I mean, I don't want to get in. I'm sure people have asked you. But the one thing I think of, I don't think you even know this, right? And you could just say, plead the fifth, move on.

Plead the fifth. But like, I always hear horror stories about Faye Dunaway. And I just want to know if any of it's true. Did you ever see that? Or let's just say, was she just intense or something you could remember? Or maybe everything was great. You know, I did not have many scenes with her. So for me, the thing I remember was now that I'm going to be 60 years old this year.

Wow. You look great. And so she was probably, thank you. She was probably only 45 maybe. I don't know. We can look it up. But how concerned she was with the lighting and the perfectionism of an aging woman and being really struck by that more than anything else. more than is she difficult or that was the thing like really tampering with the lights making

sure it was um you know being self-protective being i never have had that like i've been on tv shows forever and there are actresses they just are making i it's sort of like i hope i hope you guys have in other words you're saying they take care of the day trust the dp trust everybody but in a way i've seen things i've been in my One of my closest friends, Helen Hunt. We have a very funny story. Helen Hunt's when you're closest friends. She introduced me to my husband.

What? Yeah. I love Helen Hunt. Do you know what I always think about when I think of Helen Hunt? Her amazing moment in Castaway when she hears that he's alive and she collapses in the kitchen. Oh. That just dropped me that reaction. She's such an incredible actress.

Anyway, I love her. Go ahead. I was doing a series in Austin and we're hiking when I got back and I was like, I look so awful. Like I saw it. I was like, oh, hell, Bill. I just look so terrible. I mean, I saw the thing I just can't believe out. And she go, and I'm like, why do I look so awful? She said, because we're dying. And I was like, well, if we're dying, I guess I look pretty fantastic. And it really popped it for me. From that moment on, I was like, yeah, we're aging. I'm dying. It looks like that. I'm done. Oh, my God. Right? That is exceptional advice.

right think about it i'm gonna use that forever well she's the funniest person on her and when you get in fights with rob you go you bitch what were you think no i never ever ever ever do that no you think i would think you would do that um but that makes a lot of sense you talk about like getting older and we all do like i i even look to some degree um you know i don't look at him and say hey how's i just kind of just let everything go and then it is what it is is. Yeah. But I definitely look at myself sometimes and I'm just like, wow, wow. You're just not the kid you sometimes feel like or you remember. And you're looking more and more like an older person. And this is just the way it goes. This is, again, this is, this is life. It can't,

we can't stop it. It's herb. We need herb in the room. But, you know, but I, but I can sort of understand too. It's much harder for a woman. It's much harder. Your whole life, when you, especially when you're an actress, not especially when you're an actress, but when you're an actress, it's like, you know, um, look. There's a premium on how you look. There's a premium on pretty. There's a premium on, you know, they're just, we just value that so much in our culture. And we don't have as many avenues for the elder women or aging or, you know, but they're,

you know, it's all right. I go through this like, I'm like, I see all these guys my age and they're all ripped. A lot of them doing probably, you know. Testosterone, H-G-H, which is fine. Do whatever you want to do. I don't get a shit. You know, I might even start it. But the point is I look at him and I'm like, oh my gosh, man, do I need to look like that?

I'm like, why do you need to look like that? Are you doing a superhero movie? Yeah. What do you need to do? Ever wonder how dark the world can really get? Well, we dive into the twisted, the terrifying, and the true stories behind some of the world's most chilling crimes. Hi, I'm Ben.

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Follow and listen on your favorite podcast platform. I don't want to work out that much. I don't want to hurt my body. I've already had surgeries. I don't feel like doing it. You know what I mean? It's like, I don't want to do this shit. I'll play some sports.

I'll have some fun. I'll try to be as healthy as I can. But I don't want to like, constantly just be ripped and shredded and drinking these beans and leaves and it's just it's so daunting and it's so it's so hard to do that and the overall um result could be fascinating and you're but then you have to maintain it it's like shouldn't the part of me's like shouldn't a 50 year old kind of look like a 50 year old like they used to when you used to watch movies like george c scott's 50 80 looks like he's 80 what the fuck happened to him it's true we've had a weird

You know? Different. So everybody's trying to be looking as young as they can. Well, cigarettes and alcohol will do that. Mm-hmm. That's true. That's true. Secret of my success.

One of my heroes, one of everyone's heroes. You got to work with the Michael J. Fox. He got to work with you. But I can't imagine that. I mean, was that just awesome? Total fun job. Show up in New York City where I was from. Easy to work with.

Oh, my gosh. like total you were so young here too oh yeah this is all like I don't know I was he's older than you right a few years not that much he looked like an infant in that movie yeah you look back he looks like he's so young looking well he was on that TV show family ties right I love family ties you guys did you ever watch that I didn't but I'm that's I've seen a little bit of together for a million years is that the theme song and I bet we'll be together For a million more. Yeah, I knew all of it.

My brother and I used to sing. I used to love family ties. But go ahead. Working with him. That's it. It's fun, yeah. I remember watching the moment where he's watching you drink water from the water found.

Oh, yeah. It's just the most sexual kids dream fantasy and you just look over at him. And I'm like, oh, my God. With the 1980s haircut and the blue eyeliner, lots of blue, yeah. Yeah. Felt very 80s. I mean, you did a lot of. lot of memorable movies like ruthless people and working with bet midler and i remember the scene

with the you're talking to danny davido jenn jane held on the phone and the with the hamburger and it sounds like you're getting tortured or whatever and you know you're screen and it looks like it was so much fun on that one too that was that was those were the zooker brothers and jim abrams who were so talented kentucky fried movie and airplane and airplane and top secret were they great to work So much fun. All you did was laugh and improvise. You know, I don't know that we improvised much back then. That's like much more now current.

Right, the thing to do. Everybody's improvising. Yeah. Ruthless People was based on an O'Henry short story called like Ransom. Oh, I can't remember what it is. But anyway, the writing was so tight because it's O'Henry. But that's why I think that movie works so well. Wow.

Did you only work with great people? Have you, for the most part? Have you ever worked with those guys? guys or gals that you've worked with monsters before oh yeah i've been around a really long time you have you're not that old and don't say that you're not that much older than me but i mean i've been working since i mean in high school i did a thing with amy and the angel that matthew modine and meg ryan were in when i was 17 years old so it's been that an abc after school special do you remember what those were fettering about oh my come on yeah amy and the angel i played

Amy and it was a remake of It's a Wonderful Life. I was a suicidal teenager and Meg played one of the girls that was, I can't remember what her part, one of the high school girls and Matthew Modine played like the angel. I mean, crazy. We've been around a long time. Wow. But you've seen some shit. You've seen some actors lose their shit. You've seen some people that are difficult to work with. And how do you deal with that? You know, I've had a couple of experiences in the last 10 years and I won't name any names because I don't want to do that. But the hardest thing I would say in the television world are when actors show up and don't have their lines down, like, at all.

And I feel, and I understand the family pressures and the stresses, but I really think the stress, it's so hard to make these things, the crew, people working, you know, one-hour television, there's just nothing more brutal. Nothing. 15-hour days, like, and then the crew on top. And that thing of just, you know, if I could have a magic wand, it would be, we all would have better memories or be able to memorize lines better because I think that really does. So you remember an incident or incidents where, you know, someone didn't know their lines at all and it was holding everybody up and they didn't care. I mean, it's maybe a way of working. I would say it's something that ages me or shows that I'm from a different thing where some people just could get the lines just like that.

I mean, one thing I really don't want to keep working for is because it is so hard to memorize now. I mean, as I'm getting older, it's just... It's a lot. Yeah, and my focus is so much on writing the dissertation and being in school. And then you're just kind of mowed into this interior world of acting and line memorizing. What do you remember about being on Smallville? That was so fun. You do?

Now she had fun. That was great fun. Everybody knew their lines on that. Am I talking to you? Are you someone that never knew their lines? Is that why you're looking at? No, no. In fact, that's one of my biggest pet peeves is when people don't know their lines.

And I always have to know them inside out. So a lot of times that they say, you know, what I don't like is the night before they say, hey, first up, you're going to do this scene and we just rewrote it. That couldn't be more terrifying because I'm just as stressed as you can be. Yeah. I want to, that's why I'd rather do a movie or rather do a series where you're about to shoot that they have it all written. Yeah.

And you can prepare and know your stuff. It just makes such a difference. It makes such a difference. You change lines up. It's not a good thing. But small of it, you did a couple episodes, three episodes. I did three. Was it three?

Or something. Yeah. I had a great time. What do you remember? We didn't work together. I don't think so. No. I mean, we did kind of an iconic scene of putting the baby, Julian Sands and I,

putting the baby into the rocket to like go bring it down to. And then with, yeah, everyone was so kind on your sense. Did you remember that? I loved them all. It was a family. It sure was a family. There wasn't anybody I didn't like working with. No, and they were so sweet to me and very, you know, I felt very well.

That's what it's about. The hardest thing, and I'm repeating myself, is to be a guest star. And when you come into a place where everybody has it down, all their jobs, they know what they're doing. And you come in and you're the lone wolf or you're like the, you know, the, it's the hard. You know what my friend Kathleen Will Hoyt says. She says being a guest star or a guest director is like being the girlfriend at your boyfriend's family Thanksgiving. Okay. It's like you're going.

You're kind of welcome there. It's not your family. It's not your thing. They're still testing you, but you don't, you feel that. Do we like her? Yeah. Is he going to marry her? And who did you work with mostly?

Tom and Tom and I had a little bit with Laura Vander. Laura Vandervort, Supergirl. Vandervort. She was Supergirl, yeah. Yeah. But it was Tom and Julian. It was Tom, though, in that second or third. I can't remember.

It's too long ago. It hasn't been that long ago, hasn't. I think so. Like 10 years ago, 15 years ago. I should remember that. Was it that long? Yeah, it was something like that. What year was that, Ryan?

What? Or she was on Smallville. Okay. Because, you know, we're doing the, I told you we're doing the Smallville rewatch podcast. I know. That sounds very fun. So everybody listening is going to be. like you have to have her on oh you have to come on but we might what we might do is when we

get there to your part call me up and just zoom me in if you want to just blit you know breeze through it yeah this episode and then you can talk about what you remember go oh my god i noticed this it might be fun yeah it's kind of a why not season seven and ten well season seven was season seven was my last season i left after the seventh season that's why we so what year was oh that was uh 2007 7 it aired November of 2007 and then November of 2015 years ago do you think yeah that was it was a while ago do you still I know you're writing I know you're getting your PhD you're doing this dissertation you've got all the stuff going on and music and writing and six albums and all exhausted hearing Utah can I just yeah but do you still honestly want to act oh or does it have

to be something I mean how honest do we want to get honest look it's honest ab time here's the reality you know you've done it you've you're almost 60 you said yes isn't that great if i say it it freaks me out a little like it really is like whoof how about you're older than 50 i'm a little older than 50 i'm a woman of a certain age and you've done big movies and you've done big tv and you've you've written and you've played music and you have a great marriage you have children a daughter Hannah and you have all this you know, you've lived your life and you still have many years to go. Yeah.

But at this point, do you just say, I want to do what inspires me, what fulfills me, what makes me, I don't know, happy is kind of a, but I guess makes me happy, but a sense of, do something that has a sense of play, enjoyment. I mean, you know, because I am, I'm so steeped in myth and depth psychology that that's not a light question for me. That's probably like the most profound question you could ask. me. And what I would say is, if you have the good fortune to feel a vocation or a calling towards something, if something is pulling you and you get animated by something, you are

very, very lucky. That's good fortune. And for others and myself included, like the happiest time of my life ever has been being in graduate school. Like, there's no question. I've had so much joy acting. And certainly my marriage, Rob Wattsky, he's such an incredible partner. He teaches improv and he has this nonprofit and we do these great shows that at, you can look him up at Turbine Arts. Okay, he's going to be so mad. Turbine-dasharts.org. There's a dash.

And if they want to take an improv class, they can go there. Monday. Oh, yeah. Mondays guys. And he's incredible. He's an incredible teacher. But anyway, those have all been great joys being in relation to other people. But the thing of the like the soul work, what is your, that is like, that's the 64,000.

question and some people might end up just being being of service to others and living you know it's different for everybody for me it was about this this thing of of education and specifically learning about myth and James Hillman's writings Jung's writings you know the just that's been the joy so I don't know what it leads to after this but yeah you know I don't know it'd be great if like you could have a mythologist, you know, I need to call my mythologist the way you might call your shrink. Yeah. Be like, what would the myth person say about this?

You know, it's funny because even though you're talking about something which a lot of people probably don't know a ton about, you've studied this, spent endless hours learning and educating yourself and doing this, I think the under the message of anything we do really is ultimately doing things for yourself. doing things. It's not doing things for yourself, it's, but not doing things just to please people, not doing things just to, like we talked about earlier, but doing things that you feel whole, that make you feel complete. James Hillman, who is very present in my dissertation, who's a post-Youngian and has written incredible books, revisioning psychology is one of the big ones. But he would say

you move towards something if it animates your life. Exactly. And if you're doing something, for other people all the time, you're going to feel there's a deficit that you're, something's out of sync. I've said this before, sometimes because we have lived so much as actors where we are pleasing or trying to get it right or hit the mark or say the line, and that is so much about, it can be so much about what someone else needs from us, what the time is, what the director needs, what the writers need, we got to get it in on time. But the thing of, I sometimes will do like, no one's looking. Very pretend there's nobody around, like, what would you like to do right now?

Just very quietly on the shoulder, like, what, and it'd be like, I think I would like to do this for a little while. I'm learning to, like, fan that fire of what would be helpful right now in this moment. I hope Brian doesn't have those moments. While he's sitting here, they'll just go, you know what? Hey, Rosenbaum, kiss my ass. Yeah. This will be like, what I really need is to get out. Yeah.

All right, this is called shit-talking with Helen Slater. These are rapid-fire answers and questions. These are from my top tier patrons who get to ask questions. There's tons of goodies there. They support the show. They help keep the share. It's show flow. I love you, patron.com slash inside of you.

Keep supporting the show. Here we go. Leanne says, how do you feel about being associated with such an iconic character, Supergirl? And have you ever felt any pressure to live up to the ideals that she represents? Leanne is her name? Thank you, Leanne, for that question. I think there's a shadow part to playing a role called Supergirl,

and the shadow is that you're dealing with imperfection, not feeling like you're playing a part that's just such a lacking any kind of deficit weirdly. So that part I think is tricky, but ultimately I'm very grateful I got to do the part. Okay, little Lisa. Did you take any props or wardrobe from the Supergirl set? Little Lisa? Well, Little Lisa and Big Lisa.

I did not take any props or costumes from the set. You know I would, and I have. You have not. Well, not from your, oh my gosh, you're kidding me? That's from Onyx, that big mask up there in the middle. Wow. Episode where I was to, the real Lex was trapped in a basement. Wow.

And the bad Lex me was also away from him keeping him trapped. And I kept that. I also kept a lot of other things. Wow. Kelly S., the legend of Billy Jean is one of my favorite movies. You and Richard Bradford really got into character. Was it difficult filming the scenes with him when he was demoralizing and humiliating you? It was.

He's such a great actor and so kind. And Legend of Billie Jean, the Comic-Con's that I do, I would say almost more than half. People are coming for that. They'll come up to me and say, I shave my head because of Billy Jean. I, you know, that was, and Christian Slater was in it. We played brother and sister and that had this kind of. So, yeah, that was very difficult. sort of the very early, early embers of Me Too moment movement

because Billy Jean kind of doesn't take it lying down. She goes out on a rampage and make sure justice is served. What do you remember about Christian Slater? Such a kind, fun, sweet soul. Do you ever talk to him anymore? Not now as much, no. But back in the day, you did. Yeah, I mean, yeah.

And he's such a talented actor. And his mother, Mary Jo Slater, was a casting agent. And she's cast me in things. over the years. I worked with Christian for a year on the show. He was always great, great, great to work with. He was a great guy. He was really like, you're a little weird, Rosenbaum.

You know? Wow. But I always made him laugh. Yeah. And like I visited their set the second season because I didn't do the second season. I didn't want to do the second season. But I loved everybody. So I went back to visit.

He was directing the episode. And I remember he was just dealing with a lot of pain in the asses on set. And he came out to me, goes, I wish you were here, brother. Oh, sweet. But you're lucky you're not. Yeah. Ray H., what kind of stunts were you doing a Supergirl, did any of them feel dangerous? Oh, well, learning to fly was a little bit dangerous.

I had to be hoisted up on those piano wires up into the sky. And, yeah, that first time when they're pulling you up, like 60 feet in the air, I remember singing Hello Dolly quietly to myself, like just as I'm seeing the concrete floor. Well, to you and the sound guy, he's hearing it. We weren't filming yet. Oh, okay. It was what we were learning when I was learning. That'd be very odd.

Yeah. Raj, tell me about a time when you succeeded when others thought you would fail. That's a good question, Raj. Thank you. Yeah, Raj. I can't think of a time when I knew that other people thought I was going to fail. So I don't quite know how to answer it. But if I get an answer, I'll come back to it.

All right. Lastly, did you ever... Fastly. Well, not lastly, but I mean, pretty much lastly. I mean, this is great. It just feels like, I'm like, wow, time has flown. But you don't seem like anybody. someone who would get anxiety, someone who would deal with depression, somebody who, like,

you've had a strong, you know, head on your shoulders and, you know, good upbringing, but people get anxiety and depression for all sorts of reasons and some genetic, whatever, but did you ever have to deal with that? I have definitely weathered feeling very anxious at times. I mean, I've never been diagnosed with a clinical anxiety problem or clinical depression, but I certainly have been through periods where this adrenalized feeling, where there's a feeling like of being terrorized by something or gripped by something, and almost like my fingers in an electric socket.

Like I just wanted to change the narrative and not keep, without going into details, it was in a relationship that was becoming too confrontational all the time. And I just started to see, like, for my mental health, it just was not. it was healthier to take a step back and have some space. And what do you do now if you're feeling anxious? What are the things that you do to help you? My other wonderful image is like I've said to my therapist, like, I'm like a cat up on the ceiling. Like, where's Helen?

Then like you look up and she's like, got all four things. She's up on this. And I'm like, come down. Shh, shh, come down. You know, I'm meditate and I am a big yoga practitioner and I do hike every single day. Every day you hike. And I think, I mean, if I were to die tomorrow and leave one thing to my daughter or to anyone that would be halfway interested, it would be like, get yourself in nature as much as possible. I don't care if you have to, like, drive to the beach or get on the hike or look at a tree, just keep putting your eyes and your nervous system in nature.

Huh. Interesting. I mean, what if, like, I like nature. Are you Woody Allen in this way? It scares me that you're like, this is what you need to do. I don't hike a lot. I'm not like a... What do you like to do? You like to play golf?

I like to play competitive sports, whether I'm playing tennis or golf or softball or hockey. Oh, dear. I like to play sports. I like to watch movies. I like to play games. I like to go out to eat with friends. Do you like to go in the ocean? Do you surf or body surf?

I like to go in the ocean if it's really warm. I don't like really cold. freezing oceans. Yeah. That's not really appealing to me. And I don't like being too hot. There's nothing worse. I think basically you're describing an infant.

I don't mean to like get to. It's just. I mean, look, this is also therapy for me. This is why I have you on the show. I mean, but look, I get what you're saying. And I do like nature. I do things that are. I can't say it's prescriptive.

for everybody, I just know that there's no downside. How about that? Absolutely. Absolutely. There's no, and plus we want to interrupt these habits of mind that are just nightmares on our system and going into a park or looking at a tree or like right now, things are blooming everywhere, on Freiman Canyon everywhere. It's all starting to go. Just to look at it is going to do something to the nervous system. You know what else it is? I like to do things. with people. I like to, if, for instance, my friend Tom and Ethan and Ryan said, hey, we're going on a hike. It's not that long of a hike.

It's just kind of like an hour. You would do it because it's with your friends. Yeah, that sounds like fun. But me just getting up and going on an hour hike just seems. Annie Lamont has a great line about that. My mind is like a bad neighborhood. I don't want to visit it alone. A bad neighborhood at night.

I don't like to go there alone. Yeah, I think that's probably me. This has been an absolute joy. You are a joy. Thank you so much. I love this. It's just so easy talking to you. You comfort me. Thank you. Well, you're worth being comforted. Thank you. And you make me, you make me think. You make me sort of re-evaluate some things that I think need to be re-evaluated in my life. And you're doing great. You got a smiley face on your cap. I do. You're bringing people into your home. You've got the fabulous Ryan. You're being, you're finding fellowship. That's like you. And by the way, fellowship and circling up as a guy, having male friends and being, that's huge.

I really commend that. That thing of like being in relation with other guys and having friendships, that's a big, big piece to the puzzle. Thanks. Is your daughter an actress? Hannah, she's a writer. Hannah's a writer. Yeah. She doesn't want to act. She went to Tish. She did the acting program there. She would in her own stuff, but yeah, now she's a COVID captain on the Eddie Murphy movie. They have night shoots going on. And she's telling people to put their masks on. Really? Awesome. She's very funny.

Thank you for being here. This has been a treat. You guys are great. You're great. She was awesome. I loved to have her on the show. She was so calm, which made me calm. It was just, she was very just, hey, let's just have a conversation.

And I love that. They're not anticipating. They're just here. They're present. She's very present. And I'm sure that's taking a lot of time and work on herself. Or maybe she's just been like that her whole life. uh thanks for listening again subscribe if you really like the podcast write a review join patreon

dot com slash inside of you to get back to the podcast um you could listen to all that other stuff in the beginning and thanks helen slater for being here bryce thanks for being here how's the baby how's beckham good he's uh becoming a toddler and it's getting more fun it's harder but it's more fun there's not you can't just like put him down and go run to do something real quick and come back because he's moving constantly why did you name him beckham Uh, we just like the name. It wasn't after the soccer player. No, I don't, soccer's fine.

I didn't play soccer growing up. I don't really care about it at all. Don't care about it. Beckham's a cool name. We like it. It's just like a girl would be like, oh, Beckham. Mm-hmm. Ooh, I'm going out with Beckham.

That's why we did it. I'm going out with, it sounds like a sports name. Now up to the plate number seven, Beckham Mallors. I think he has to play soccer. Oh, I don't know because he's getting the shadow. Oh, look, that's Beckham. Like you can't name your kid Kobe. and he doesn't play basketball.

It's ridiculous. I don't know, man. All right. We love you guys. Thanks for listening. And let's give a shout. Let's give our shoutouts. Top tier patrons.

These are them. These are the ones. A lot of perks with Patreon if you're listening for the first time. I do YouTube lives with the patrons. I send boxes to the top tiers every couple of months with a personalized note. We do a lot of stuff. and there's more stuff coming. You get to ask questions on the podcast and blah, blah, blah.

Inside of you is successful because of Patreon. Patreon.com slash inside you. Let's get the shoutouts. Nancy D. Leah S. and Kristen K. Little Lisa, Ukiko. Jill E. Brian H. Nico P. Robert B. Jason W. Sophie M. Raj C. Raj told me to watch an animated movie.

And I was like, no, thanks. It was like, I don't know. I don't like. what's it called playmation no not anime i'm not really big in the anime anime anime i'm just never been in anime i just never got into it yeah so when people tell me to watch it i just

i should probably watch spider universe or whatever spider verse yeah i've heard good things about that but again i'm just it doesn't appeal to me i like real tangible like people but not succession succession succession is just too dysfunctional for me in my dysfunctional life i don't want to be more depressed Joshua D, Jennifer N, Stacey L, Jamal F, Janelle B, Mike E, L dance, a promo, 99 more. You know who I miss? Ramira.

She's not on here anymore. Remember Ramira? Yeah. Yeah. San Diego M. San Diego M made that statue. The bust. He also made the little bust that I was putting on the inside of you online store.

And those were purchased really fast. He's doing a sorority boys one of Adina. Oh, that's cool. Yeah. So he's going to do some. of those and he's doing another Lex Luthor figure so he's a man yeah San Diego M, Chad W Lianp Mattie S, Belinda and Dave H Dave Hall hello Dave Sheila G Brad D, Ray H, hi-da tab of the T, Tom and what's that Tom

old Tommy boy Talia M Betsy D I miss Betsy D and Talia all of you Angel M M, Rian and C, Corey K Dave Nexon Michelle A, Jeremy C, Brandy D, Yvore, Joey M, Eugene and Leah Corey Jake B Eugene and Leah How's the baby? I hope well I hope not crying all the time

Like they did at the con that time Angel F Mel S Christine S Eric H, Shane R Andrew M, Tim L Amanda R Jen B Kevin E

Stephanie K Jarrell Jammin J Leanne J Luna R Mike F Stonehenge Stone H Brian L Kendall L Meredith I

Kada C Jessica B Kail Mattisal P, Estabungi, K.L. A. Ashley F. Marion Louise L. Romeo B. Veronica Q. Frank B. Gen T. Nikki L. April R. Cassie B. and Derek N. Couldn't do it without any of you. We love you. Thank you. Thank you for listening. Thank you for supporting. And without further due, I am Michael Rosenbaum from the Hollywood Hills in California. I'm Ryan Tejas. no you're not I'm Bryce from the Hollywood Hills of California yeah that's it a little way for the camera I don't know the sign off that's all right we love you guys um thanks for listening and be good to yourself we'll see you you

hi I'm Joe Sal C hi host of the stacking Benjamin's podcast today we're gonna talk about what if you came across $50,000 what would you do put it into a tax advantage retirement account the mortgage that's what we do make a down payment on a home something nice buying a vehicle a separate bucket for this addition that we're at 50,000 dollars I'll buy a new podcast you'll buy new friends and we're done thanks for playing everybody we're out of here stacking benjamins follow and listen on your favorite platform