Inside of You with Michael Rosenbaum - LOTR Sean Astin Talks Identity, Destigmatizing Anxiety, and Social Stigmas

Episode Date: April 6, 2021

The lovable Sean Astin (Lord of the Rings, Rudy) returns to the show this week and talks about being content with one’s mortality, life within the Covid-19 pandemic, and overcoming stigmas within the mental health field. Sean gives an update with the Patty Duke Mental Health Organization and how he started his own charity called Run Third. We also discuss his negative interactions with doctors in the past and the complications that can come with certain medical diagnoses. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

You're listening to Inside of You with Michael Rosenbaum. That was more energetic than I normally, do you, Ryan? It was. You prefer the energetic version? I don't mind it. It's nice. You're listening to Inside of you. Nah, I don't want to be an announcer guy. You know, I never had a good voice for years.

I mean, all of a sudden people saying, oh, we like your voice. I'm like, oh, all right, well, thanks, I guess, because I was so used to my voice being annoying and kind of like high-pitched, but maybe I started puberty. I don't know the answer. In your 40s? Maybe. You have a good week? Yeah, I had an okay week. That was your week.

That was pretty good, man. I'm alive. I'm doing my gratitude's more. I'm trying to be thankful for more stuff. Had a great conversation on Instagram live last week with a kid, Zach, a friend of mine. His dad's a friend of mine. They became friends of mine. I met him at a con and he has a bionic arm.

He was born without a limb. Wow. And he writes a comic book called The Bionic Kid. And he's only 12 years old. and what a sensational young man he is and great, great family and so positive and just works really hard. And there's this company called Limitless, L-I-M-B-T, L-I-M-B-I-T, L-E-S-S, Limitless. And you could donate and help us cause.

They make it easy for people who need Bionic Arms that, you know, they don't want people to pay. So they could always use your donation. So it's a great place. I think it's limitless.3D or just go on Instagram to Limitless with a B. Limbentless. And I did this great conversation on Instagram live just with him for like 30 minutes and just talked about him growing up. And if it's hard for him and how grateful he is to have a bionic arm and, you know,

and he's just a pleasant kid. And it was really nice to do. Usually I do, you know, Instagram lies to promote my, podcast to promote the band do something funny and this felt like it was something good and it was easy and uh i love talking to him so zach all my love to you great conversation you can find that on my instagram at the michael rosenbaum uh and thank you everyone for listening um where can they uh subscribe brian they can subscribe on apple podcast Spotify and uh youtube.com slash inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum.

And then, of course, the handles of at Inside of You Pod on Twitter, at Inside of You podcast on Instagram and Facebook. Yeah, so please subscribe, follow us, all that, send 100 emails every week to all your friends and make sure they subscribe. We could use your love. Thanks to all my patrons out there. Big family now. Got a lot of patrons.

You can go to patreon.com slash inside and join today. I'll send you a message after. It's just like a big club, a club full of people who have a lot of similarities and enjoy the podcast and they help it out a little more. They donate and subscribe, well, donate, I guess. And there's a bunch of added stuff, you know, zooms and merch boxes I send and all that stuff. So you guys know the ropes. So what's it called? Patreon.com slash inside.

And thank you for supporting the band, Sunspin. If you want any merch like lunchboxes, hats, beanie, coasters, the band is Sunspin. You can see my logo shirt right here. So Sunspin, you get these sweet shirts. Go to Sunspin.com. You can book the band if you want, book a Zoom and the inside of you store where you can get tons of merch like Lex autographs, Lex Luther stuff, Flash stuff, Lex Luther T-shirts, which I'm almost out of. In fact, a lady ordered a small, and we don't have any, so I have to now be the bear of bad news. Sorry, I don't have one.

I'm wearing it. No, no, but thanks. And that's the inside of you online store. And there's always, usually have discounts on there. We had discounts the last two weeks. So, sweet. Also, my buddy gave me this bottle of vodka. It's pretty amazing.

It's, PAPO, Popo Joe's, Papo J's, Pappo J's, Lambinog vodka, detailed from 100% coconut nectar in the islands of the Philippines. Pappo J's Lombonog vodka. So check that out. He's just a buddy. Pretty good weekend. I sometimes I just find myself getting overwhelmed. Then I take a deep breath and I say, hey, things are okay.

And then I think, oh, well, you're not on the right meds or oh, you're on this. I'm like, no, you're just, you know, you're not perfect, dude. So go out for a walk, have a workout, disconnect. I'm trying. I had some good interviews this last week. We interviewed this one guy who really talked about. mental illness and I can't wait till he airs, talks about having a psychosis, psychotic break, and that was interesting.

Last week was Richard Spate and Rob Benedict from Supernatural. And, you know, we talk about Rob having a stroke and Richard saving his life. And that's just a fascinating story. So catch up on that one. Today's guest is, he's become a friend. I think this guy's got a heart of stone. Gold, gold, not stone. Jesus.

A precious stone. A precious stone. right what's a precious stone uh silver like uh like a like a ruby like an opal oh you're thinking that stone yeah that i was thinking you're right you're right so i'm trying to justify your slip up yeah well we could just uh forget i said it and stop welling on it anyway you've seen him in goonies you've seen him in rudy you've seen him in lord of the rings the sky's been everywhere but boy does he open up and i just always enjoy talking to him and uh you can you know watch this on video and watch

the wonderful Sean Aston he's a terrific man I didn't know that but his dad is Mr. Adams he was the original what's his name Mr. Adams and the Adams family that's as far as I know too yeah anyway why don't we waste no more time and get into Sean Aston it's my point of you

you're listening to inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum Inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum Was not recorded in front of a live studio audience Ladies and gentlemen, Sean Ashton is in a studio. Do you have a studio at your house, dude? I'm in my daughter's bedroom. What?

And we've set up this little, I just recorded a book on tape. And so it's the only room with dead enough sound. So she's like, Dad, what do you? are you i was like yeah no i'm doing a podcast she goes can i have my room back so yeah so you're in your daughter's bedroom right now yeah and is it a corner of her bedroom is it like because i have these little like wardrobe stands with furniture pads on them but i'm so sick of zooms like oh here's your backyard oh this is your living room oh this is your whatever i'm like you know what

I just have this thing set up. I'm going to do this like some badass in a studio guy. Well, it looks like professional. It looks like, I mean, you know, your mic's in the air. You know, it's not just in front of you. You got the sound sheets up, the blankets. You could be anywhere, but. And I know, there's her little.

Oh, look at that. It's inappropriate for me to show her room. So I'm just going to. It's completely inappropriate. How are you, buddy? I miss you. I'm so boring. That's what I am.

I'm boring now. I miss you too. You haven't changed debate. COVID hasn't hurt you. That's not true. I had knock on what I haven't gotten COVID, but like I was just saying the day, Ryan's like you look like shit. I go, well, you know, I just got off these meds that, you know, for, you know, some anxiety

stuff. And I got off it. And I'm just a little dizzy. I'm like a little bit off. And I just took a big poop. So that was cool. So you're off like if you lay down and then you sit up, you're off? No, it's just like all the time.

It's just like, you know, when I turn my head, it's just a second. of like, it kind of comes back to me. But it's, when did you finish? Two days ago. So, you know, it's kind of an abrupt thing. It was just like, you know, I was on a low dose and it was just like not working. So I don't know how everyone isn't on anxiety medicine. I mean, too many Christmas, this entire planet is anxiety inducing, you know?

I mean, at this point, helicopters go over the house low. And I'm like, Jesus, it's over. The incoming is here. I'm sorry that you had that challenge, but you look from my side of things, bad ass as usual. Well, thanks. There's some filters on. No, there's no filters. But, like, you know, I know we've talked about this in the past, but, like, I mean, are you anxious?

Are you getting anxiety? Do you deal with it? You take any, like, Xanax or anything that's like cope with this Shiza? I haven't taken any anxiety medicine. I, listen, we're all, the mental health. situation coming out of this pandemic for every single human being is something that has to be addressed actively. You can't, I don't think any of us, I mean, I saw some show from the 80s. We were sitting watching TV, which is like what we do. And some show from the 80s came on and there

was a scene with a bunch of people in it. And I literally had this feeling of like being worried about the people in the room. Like all those people are in the same room together. That's not healthy that's not safe you're like that's 1987 so i mean i definitely my entire consciousness has has been you know reconfigured or something so yeah no i mean we're it's we're hurting we're absolutely hurting there's no question about it when you say we're hurting your family's hurting yeah all me my my family my wife seems to handle it the best but each of the kids we have three daughters yep we all go through moments

where you're like, what is wrong with you? What's going? Oh, like, wait a minute. Maybe if it wasn't COVID for the last 12 months, this moment of, you know, anxiety just says a different word. Like, what is anxiety? You know, we got a camper. We haven't left the house. Wait a minute.

You haven't left the house since March? In a year. No, no, no, no. come on you go to the grocery store no way everything gets delivered the groceries get delivered on the step sits out there for half hour we have we my my girls all have um asthma and they all get pneumonia really easy and so they're their their doctor early on was like you know what you're in a high you're not in a high risk group my wife actually is because she has a thing but um i don't know how much i'm supposed to talk about what they have but the the um they're like you you

need to be on the extreme end of cautious so we we took that and And now, you know, yeah, so yeah, I have anxiety. Now we're like, when do you go outside? Every time I see people outside, I'm like, oh my God, what's going on with them? The only time I've gone outside was our car battery. When the fires were happening, I'm like, if we have to evacuate because of the fires, we need to make sure the cars are running. So I had to go out and jumpstart the cars because the battery died.

And then I would just drive around in circles inside of our little gated community, you know, for 25, 30 minutes, watching people walking their dogs without mask and being like, like they're vampires the people without their mask up so yeah I mean and then we got a camper but we had our former nanny and my

and who was sort of functioned like an assistant for us really for a lot of years was happy to greet the camper when I say camper I mean like one of those teardrop fits one person guy in Yosemite who's going to be rock climbing outdoor campers right like not like a I'm thinking of a big RV like a camper no no no this is like pull behind a you can pull it behind a car it's so small you

can lift it up and move it but it's got like you know all the stuff you'd want it's got a stove stove and a microwave and a bathroom and all that stuff all within you know it's like the size of three porta-potties but in a teardrop shape and we got it because the girls were worried. This was right when it was happening. This was like in May, right, during one of the big, the first big peak, I guess. And the girls, we were worried like, okay, the last time we had to evacuate the house, first we spent two days in a hotel and then we have all these dogs. Oh, that's our, instead of Xanax, we got a puppy. That that calms your anxiety, the puppy? Well, it completely takes your attention away from everything and they're so cute.

But once that settles, you have to keep getting a puppy like every six months. What kind of puppy? I go crazy. I go crazy. I have a two and a half year old. Oh, we, we, this one is a King Charles, King Cavalier, King Charles, Cavalier, whatever it's called. Cavalier, King Charles Spaniel. And it is so cute. He's like a, uh, she's like a teenager now.

She's grown from this to this and she's, uh, my wife was up all night with her last night because she must have eaten like a piece of popcorn that she shouldn't have had or something. So that wasn't, that wasn't a pretty pretty story. But we have, so we have like, we have a lot of, we, we, I can't even talk about our dog situation. but we have that's our um but the camper so it's small enough to fit in the garage and we have like a normal two-door you know the we have we have a two-door and then a one door so it's like you know why such a small camper you've got three girls you got a wife you got dogs you got there's a bad

decision it's a bad that's something bigger you got a little money i mean you got three kids so i don't know how much but we did but where are you going to put it we're a driveway in front of the house let people be upset that you got we live on a hill hill like this, like yours, but like three times as steep as yours, like this. Like if you drop a basketball out of, like you get out of the back and you open up when a basketball falls out, you will kill a child on a tricycle at the bottom of the hill. It is. It ends up at the forum.

It is a steep, remember that Bill Cosby routine about Go-Carts? It's like a, do you remember that? No. It's like his first or second comedy album, he did this hilarious thing about Go-Carts. I don't know. Maybe we're not laughing at it now. But we were, the whole idea. of it listen this is like your anxiety you managed it what do you mean i managed it i'm trying to

manage it right now as i speak to you but think of the absurdity of how everyone is thinking about things it's absurd yeah like i was watching the news today sean and i don't want to just throw you know useless knowledge or like hearsay but i did hear something like oh we know that the vaccines last at least three months. I'm like, I literally from the other room go, what? Three months? Was that from the White House briefing room? Was that from the CDP thing? Was that my biggest, my biggest problem has been you look at some of these other countries and they may not be 100% accurate with what they're saying, but they seem to be speaking with one clear voice. And in our freedom, love, and country, there's no consistency in what you're hearing, partially because

they're learning what's happening as it's happening, you know, don't wear masks, or only wear masks for other people. Oh, yeah, you got to wear masks for yourself. And, you know, you play them back to back and you're like, are these people schizophrenic or are they really learning something as they go along and you, and not just that, but, you know, this, this situation was predict predictable and predicted i mean have you seen contagion well you've been just it's great for your anxiety if you watch contagion i'm not watching that shit i watched uh greenland last night my friend marina back room was in this movie greenland with gerard jeopardy no gerard butler not jefferedu totally different guys totally different guy completely different noses or is that syrana de bursur

her body mass index i watched it and it was like this these meteor falling out of the sky meteors And I just was like, Ryan, I was like, holy crap, I gave me some anxiety right there. That was enough, you know? That could happen. You never know. You always hear, yeah, a meteor is 400 million miles away. It probably won't strike Earth. And no one gives a shit.

They're like, oh, yeah, whatever, not listening. I always hear that there's a meteor that might crash tomorrow. And then it passes by, well, we dodged a bullet with that one. And you're like, first of all, why didn't you, I want to know enough time to panic. I don't want to, like, have my, don't rob me of my panic. rob me my pain you don't want to know if it's happening i want to know it's got to be like the last second they're like a meteor is expected to strike and it's either that or they don't even tell you because it's like the fear that it will be instilled upon us i think that will just everybody will

run over each other and you know i remember seeing um i think it was sandra bullock on the letterman show and i think it was her it might have been another another actress but i think it was her and her private jet had some trouble when it was landing like the landing gear messed up or there was a flat tire when it landed and there was skidding involved and she's telling David Letterman this anecdote about what happened and he's like my god well what were you thinking are you okay and she described it a little bit and he's like yeah but you seem so calm and she goes well it's not happening now yeah yeah yeah That's true.

Let us calibrate our terror relative to the timing of the threat. So we know, like, there's a lot that we know and understand. And this is where religion can play a useful role or jazz music can play a useful role. Like some people are like, you know what, we're all, nobody's getting out of this alive. We're all, you know what I mean? If we're lucky, we live to 117, like, that lady who just beat COVID in France or wherever. I mean, the queen's almost

100. Margaret lived till 100 something. You know, it's ridiculous. Yeah, so then we are midlife at the moment if we're, but the point is like we've there was a moment when when Lord of the Rings won best picture

that moment I was like I can I feel like I've made a contribution to the to the world I feel like I've done like if I die now I can die at peace because I did something and I think teachers and nurses and fire fire like if whatever your thing is if you if you live and it doesn't have to be epic you know like some people my wife I remember when we first got together we were sitting in the bathtub with my gorgeous girlfriend at the time and I you know

shoes this uh she's sexy and always still is of course you're waiting you're sitting in the bathtub with your wife yeah obviously naked oh yeah we take baths naked okay i just wanted to make sure because you never know some people i'm just painting a picture for you man we just had our fit our 30th first date anniversary uh on the 13th wow yeah and you're going to be 50 in a week and it's it a week yeah yeah holy shit buddy life but you've already made a contribution. So who cares whatever you do now? Well, that's the thing. Well, we were sitting, we were in this bathtub and I was, I proposed to her the first minute I met her. I was like, you know, the fact that she even looked twice in me was ridiculous. Like, clearly she had some

mental defects because you can't be that gorgeous and that stupid like to go for me. I'm like this spastic actor guy running around. And, uh, and, and, and we're there and she's from Indiana. Her dad was a firefighter. I grew up in Indiana. Indiana is beautiful, right? And, and, you know, but she was, she was small town people she was working actually in beverly hills at the time at a commercial agency that's how we met but but her mentality as sophisticated as she was she was like real people you know she's like a normal how so says what she means means what she says like you know doesn't can see uh artifice for what it is you know like enjoys things that are exciting and and you know whatever but but has a sense of perspective about the world it's just a worldview i know you know

that some people have a way of a way of being, a settledness. She came from a family, like her mom died when she was three. Her dad cycled through a lot of different women. She's, there was a lot of drama in her early life. And it just, it just, what came out of that was a person who was like, you know what, that can define me or I can be me. You know what, though? When I just figured out what you just said, her dad died when she was, or mom died when she

was three. her dad, you know, was a flanderer, you know, with women coming in and out. And then my thought is, then she sees you. And for some reason, you're already in the bathtub when she sees you. And she has, she looks at you and says, this. Because this guy, you have a certain disposition that gives comfort to people. You are comforting, Sean. And I think that that's a big part of, let me my wrong.

she just felt like you are a humble man who could give her other things besides pleasure. I think I was both a nurturing type figure, like a stable person. Because I was all in from the second I met her. You know what I mean? There was no. How fast? Come on. People say that.

But how fast were you all in? Five minutes. Maybe less. She said maybe not. Her brother worked, her late brother worked at the, actually, her late brother, Carrington that's he painted that oh wow that's his painting he was a painter um but he uh he worked down the hall she worked in the celebrity side and he worked in the uh what non celebrity side i don't whatever but um he came in like five minutes after we met and she said this is my brother carrington

and i stood up and said carrington it's a pleasure to meet you may have permission to marry your sister and he she was just uh had broken up with someone that he did not like so he was like sure just like that he just sold her out i'm like damn he's kind of like don't trust that guy now how many dates before you actually proposed uh how long was julia a year i think like on my knee with a ring formal proposal was three months i couldn't imagine that i mean i hope god willing that happens to me someday that i just it doesn't have to happen like that for everybody well no but i think it will for me i think if i'm going to either that or it's just i someone sticks with me for so long that I'm just like I don't know they're still around maybe I should just marry

this person if they could put up with my shit I'm gonna because I just watched uh this Richard prior uh documentary and this woman just kept I mean this guy was not a great I mean look genius comedian one of the best but also not a great guy I mean you know there's some dark shit and she stood but even if after he got burned even after he got I think MS or you know she stood by him, he says, oh, let's get married. She's like, I mean, I don't even know how she said yes, but she did. And I think that he felt like, wow, no matter what I do, she sticks around, man, she loves me that unconditionally.

And there's something to be said about that, like, you know, they put up with your shit. And I think for me, there's probably some deep down childhood shit that I'm like, ah, I can't be loved. I don't believe it. There's got to be ulterior motives. No one could love me. There's got to be that. I know there is.

And so, well, I love you too. But I think that there has to come a time where you have to say, you know what, I'm worthy. You know, someone should love me. But you've always felt like you could be loved. You're a lovable guy, right? I'm telling you, I love you. I haven't done an interview in a year. Really?

Well, I mean, I'm doing different things. But like, the reason we're doing this interview is because there's something inside of you, some pure thing that I, that means something to me. And of course you're worthy of love. Of course you are. You know, a lot of times you feel like some people, like you're a thoughtful guy and you're not just thought. You're an emotionally thoughtful guy and you're, and sometimes you feel like you wouldn't be, you know, like you, you would, you wouldn't be good for the other person, you know, like you, like you, but you would. But I feel like I'm going to let him down. I always feel like I'm going to let you down.

We let every, we let you, I let my wife down so much. It's just awful. I honestly, I like, I want to bring up with her for her. Like, I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I am me. And I'm, yeah, no, we always let each other down. But like with the Richard Pryor thing, there's something inside.

In particular, if you can see that thing inside somebody else and other people can't see it because they're wowed by the spectacularity of it all or they're put off by the, you know, the grotesquery of all of it. But you see that thing in them and they know you do and they see it in you. That's there's something, it's a connection. It's a soul. It's a sound agent. You know, but what I said in the bathtub to my wife was because I wanted to be president in the United States.

I wanted to be the CEO of a billion dollar corporation. I wanted to be like David Lean or some filmmaker on some spectacular scale. I wanted everything. I wanted it all, man. And so we're saying, but this, this girl was like more important than any of that because she was her. And I said, trying to negotiate our future in the bathtub, I said, do you believe that some people, are destined for greatness. And she said,

I believe you can be happy having a simple life. And I was like, fuck, I knew she's going to say something like that. Jesus, man. It's so, oh. And so like somewhere, when it comes to being afraid of the things in this world that can kill us, like, you have to take care. you have to be cautious, but at a certain point, you have to live. I mean, that's what I'm going to be trying to tell myself when it's time to go back outside.

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That's Q-U-I-N-C-E. dot com slash inside of you free shipping and 365 day returns quince dot com slash inside of you the most extreme thing no i think i felt depression during this but i think the most acute thing i felt and it's happened like five times over the year is um a claustrophobia a panic associated with claustrophobia like normally i would think that i would be the kind of person who'd go out and help with um food distribution for people or something something to contribute to society i want to be one of the those people and it's probably good that i like i'm probably lucky i didn't do that but but uh because i'm like heavy and like when you're you actually look good you i look like you

like you lost weight actually uh from the time i saw you i did but my pandemic i lost I lost 30 pounds. I juiced and fitness and did all that in the, you know, like on the treadmill and in the backyard with Jumping Jackson, in the sun all the time. And in February, March, last year, I was like the pinup guy I always wanted to be. I remember. You were like really rocking it. Yeah.

And then came May and June and July. And I hadn't eaten any sugar, no refined sugar at all because it's sugar is my heroin, until July. and then the second I ate sugar starting in July catastrophic it was a catastrophic yeah systems failure well I've been doing that Sean I've been I never was a sweets guy I was like I don't really buy sweets I'll eat chips but I won't eat sweets and all of a sudden the last few months the whole Girl Scout cookie shit you know people are like saying buy that so I'm like of course I will and then I'm not going to eat them I'll give them away and then the mince you

can't not eat the mince and then you got the peanut butter cookies so you throw them in the fucking frizz freezer or fridge and they get real hard and the coconut ones though nobody's gonna eat no no no coconut but then all of a sudden you're like going then i'm ordering um post mating jamba juice smoothies i'm like spending 18 dollars to have something delivered i'm like what the hell are you doing and it's like sugar city today was the first day i had a trainer come he stood outside the garage outside and just told me what to do and it was hard maybe that's why i'm a little lightheaded today, but it is, it's, it's so. Did you eat food? Yeah, I did. I had a big

breakfast. I had eggs, bacon, and, uh, I cooked myself some eggs bacon and toast. Perfect, perfect workout food. No? I wouldn't think, well, bacon, probably not. What's wrong with bacon? It's, but, but like right before you worked out? No, right after. Oh, okay. Oh, okay. So you were car loading up or whatever. Well, yeah, man. I mean, like, I had a donut and I had like, you know, I creeps and I, I don't know why I feel like shit. I had positional vertigo once. Oh,

all I know is vertigo is the Jimmy Stewart movie that is creepy that you can't look down because you get like get dizzy. Right. So the there's a word that I always, okay, conical, the conical inner ear like it looks like, looks like a shell deep in your inner ear. When you go into the ear, nose and throat, they'll show you a picture of like, oh, this is your inner ear. sometimes this can happen to people where you get a tiny like tiny can't even see it with the naked eye piece of grit or something

that lands wrong in there and it makes you dizzy I was doing a thing where I'd be in the bed and I'd sit up and my eyes would be going like this and I'm like oh my God I'm dying or I lean forward and you feel like this pressure in your head and you look up and my eyes go so I went to the doctor and they did all these tests

and they go you have positional vertigo I'm like, what the, you know. How do I get rid of it? Well, I said, how do you get rid of you? He goes, it's really actually, it's kind of a lifelong thing. What? I've been experiencing it for weeks, like two weeks, three weeks. I thought maybe it's, maybe I have the flu.

I don't know, I don't know what I thought it was, but I'm not like a race to the doctor kind of guy back then in my 20s. And the second he said that, I never had it again. Well, I may have had it a couple times like in the last 30 years, but I never, but I was like, there's no way I'm going to have that. all the time. So I don't know if it was psychosomatic or if I just dealt with it a little bit better, but I don't know what the situation was, but for, I always thought it could get me out of, um, like a DUI. I have positional vertigo.

I don't really drink. These tests of yours are not going to work. Can you walk the straight line? No, I've just told you. I have something in my killicle. What is the little thing here? Positional vertigo, your honor. What's the thing in your ear, the collicule, the conical? The hair conicone. Conical means cone. The inner ear is shaped like a cone. Right, gotcha. But I'm just saying like the, so I know that dizzy sensation. But what I've saying was the panic associated with claustrophobia.

Because I would look outside and it was little, we have a nice big home. We're very lucky. We have a nice backyard. We can go in a pool and lay out in the sun. And like, if you're going to be in house arrest somewhere, this is where you'd want to be in house arrest. It's nice. You know, but at a certain point, I remember Shaq saying at one point, he lost a championship and like was it before Kobe or with i can't remember but he he was like

it doesn't matter how rich you are when you lose he's like you've got four walls and when you win they seem like the biggest four walls ever they go when you lose it's just a fucking wall you know and you're just staring at a wall and i remember thinking like this optical sensation that the walls were like wobbly like i'm not going to be able to leave like i'm not leave, what happens if I can never leave again? What if, you know, this was before they talked about variants and stuff, too. This is like, what if it lasts forever? What if, you know, and then you watch shows like Last Man on Earth.

Right. Yeah, I've seen it, yeah. Oh, that's great. Oh, my God, he's so great in that show. He kind of makes it like, it wouldn't be that bad to be the last person on Earth, I guess. But anyhow, that sensation, all of the, like, layers of emotional and psychological stuff that come along with this, I think we all have to address ourselves to being patient and realizing that it is going to take time for us to learn how to human again, how to be with other people.

Well, yeah. Well, what's scary is, well, doesn't it scare you? I guess not you're the kind of person that they say you have situal, a positional vertigo, and then the next day you're like, fuck, no, I don't. You know, I don't have that. And then it goes away. So it may be a stupid question, but, you know, obviously, We talked about your incredibly famous mother, Patty Duke, the late Patty Duke, God rest your soul.

And she suffered for mental illness. In fact, there's an organization, the mental health. What is it called? Patty Duke Foundation. The Patty Duke Mental Health Organization, which finally is making its first expenditure of money over, she died five years ago, almost six years ago. And, well, just about almost exactly six years ago. At the end of next month, it'll be six years. We've just been holding the money because we raised a bunch of money, but it wasn't enough

to do to like start a foundation the way we wanted to so now connected with um coming out of COVID we're we're sponsoring or we're trying to help take um this charity that does um it's a running charity and and it's for kids elementary school kids and it's it's a charity that I started uh and it's been self-sustaining but at this moment because of COVID it's it's going to have a dip so we've actually have figured out a couple of things that we can do. And because kids need, it's called run third is my charity that I started. And it's my idea that I started and then Mindy really started the actual charity. But it provides an after school running program for elementary school kids in underserved areas.

And the run third is I run first for myself. So we're teaching the kids about self-empowerment. There's a whole curriculum. I run second for my family. So it's about connecting them with their friends. family and giving their family a way to connect with them associated with this running kind of experience they're having and the third is i run third for others and so it's a hashtag r un3rd it's when i in 2010 1112 somewhere like that i started this thing and it becomes like a living

prayer chain on the hashtag and we've got it's in 12 it's it's in 13 schools 10 or 11 in mesa and then one in arkansas and one in massachusetts and so it's it's it's having a dip at the moment because there's they can't do the normal fundraising they do and that there's a 5k at the end so these kids imagine a fourth fifth grade kid they don't do you know most of them don't run 5ks but you you basically give them this little curriculum and you coach them and you give them an asser kids are happy to do whatever you do if you spend time with them so we we provide this after school experience with them and they at the end of it it culminates with them doing this 5k run and they put on their back the sign of the run third, who they're running for.

That's great. And the kids are like, they're so happy and they're so proud and they're so alive when they come through it. And it's a selfless thing. They're dedicating their run, so to speak, to other people. And so the Paddy Duke Mental Health, that money that I've parked in nowhere waiting for something to invest it in, we're going to support this because coming out of COVID, kids are going to need structure, they're going to need fitness, they're going to need

some way to orient to the world. and I think it's actually a really good application of that. And the funny thing was right, the day after my mom, it was the day after she passed her, the day after her funeral. I can't remember it was like a couple days after she passed or something that I went to our 5K. So I went from Idaho where my mom lived down to Mesa, Arizona, where the 5K was and people were, there's condolences,

and it was a whole thing. And so I don't know, I feel like there's a tie-in there. but um what the fuck was your question one was well no i mean look it wasn't really a question it was like talking about your mom and talking about the foundation and after she passed and mental health but really the question is did you ever worry because it seems like someone you're on someone i would worry that maybe bipolar manic depressive they're both the same thing utterly right i mean oh if you opened up the diagnostic you know there's the that manual this big, I can never should remember that it's the PD something.

I can't remember what it. It's a diagnostic manual for all mental illness. If you open it up, and I'm sure this is true for a lot of people, but if you, you know, I am sure that I satisfy a great number of the criteria that would be listed on it. So the good, you know, we talk about my wife, the, to have a partner in managing my mental life is a gift from God, really. And then, you know, yeah, it's just very aware of me and my life and my history and just

keeps an eye, keeps an eye. And then the other thing I was saying was that we have kids, and it is a hereditary situation. You know, the thing about the conical thing, just going back for a second, about doctors, they are not very conic. Very conical. Her conical. If you want to say something about that diagnosis, their jobs, doctors' jobs are constantly under threat of, like, the liability that they live under.

Everything they say could ruin their career, their practice, their financial life, their kids, fortune. So doctors generally will lean on a more severe interpretation of what, you know, a, you know, you know, just they give you a harder diagnosis than... To cover the basis. Yeah. But I mean, you're like, oh, well, it's a permanent thing. Well, it wasn't permanent. But you know what?

I can never say to the guy after five years. You never said that it was still going to be with me after you misrepresented something. You said it would go away. How many girls do you know who are like, I was told I can never have children? True. Right. Right. Well, people like you, you'll never walk again.

Right. And then they walk. Right. If anything, it gives you, uh, What's the word? Ambition or not hope. I mean, that would be a hopeless thing to hear. I mean, you'll never walk again.

I thought you meant the idea that they're not true. All they can give you hope. But no, yes, no, they give you determination. Determination, yeah. Determination. I mean, that's really where people decide who they are. Sure. How are you going to receive such a harsh diagnosis?

But I think with mental illness, you know, my mom's mental illness, her thing was use her diagnosis as a, I think we talked about this last time, but as an identity, like, who are you? Are you the person who behaved badly on a few sets and in relationships and had a reputation for being volatile? Or are you a person who is a champion for something that you've overcome? So she chose, she chose that one. So we all pick what we want our narrative to be, what we want our relationship to the public to be. And so I've always engaged the mental health bipolar discussion from the point of view of someone who grew up from a family member as a family member.

Survivor in a way, right? You know, that's a word. Yeah, sure. I don't like that word for me. I don't like it for me, but I certainly understand it. I mean, that word is, we're very aware of that word in modern culture right now because of the kind of the women's movement, you know, has advanced so significant. in the past few years and being a survivor it's like a new it's a new it's a new word in the

it's not a new word but it's gained real currency lately so I wouldn't use it for me and with my mom's sense but yeah I mean it's I think it probably is appropriate because you know it's it was there was like we talked about it it was it was hard there were really really really really hard painful tragic violent like bad times as a as a as a kid but no what I'm just saying like I've haven't wanted to talk about bipolar relative to me personally. I haven't wanted to say, like, that's my identity. That's who I am. That's my experience.

I've been more than happy to, because my mother for herself, chose to make her experience, her diagnosis, her recovery, her advocacy, she made that a very public thing. She wrote books. She made a movie. She was on talk shows. I mean, it was her raison d'etra, you know. It's who she was. It's what she wanted her legacy to be.

I don't want or need that to be my legacy. What I'm happy to do is travel around the country and speak to groups about bipolar disorder from the perspective of a family member. But, you know, anybody who knows me, who's experienced me in my life is like, oh, okay, you know. Wait, wait, wait, when you say, okay,

are you saying okay as if you might, not that you diagnose yourself, but when you read about things, you think there's a good chance that I probably have it and I'm working on it and it's a constant battle and something you don't really talk about? Sort of. I mean, any commercial I see on TV for any ailment,

I'm sure I have that ailment. We can always do that. I'm like, oh, my God, my hair was flaky. I'm sure I haven't. Oh, my God. Fibromyalgia is, let me tell you, that thing is always on CNN. They must pay off. If they would just not do ads, they'd probably save millions of dollars.

But honestly, I look at the fibromyalgia, and I look at it and I go, fatigue, constant fatigue. I'm like, oh, my God, I got the fasja. Inside of you is brought to you by Rocket Money. If you want to save money, then listen to me because I use this. Ryan uses this. So many people use Rocket Money. It's a personal finance app that helps find and cancel your unwanted subscriptions. Crazy, right?

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and tell them you heard about them from my show. Bombas makes the most comfortable socks, underwear, and T-shirts. Warning, bombus are so absurdly comfortable you may throw out all your other clothes. Sorry, do we legally have to say that? No, this is just.

just how I talk, and I really love my Bambas. They do feel that good, and they do good, too. One item purchased equals one item donated. To feel good and do good, go to Bambas.com and use code audio for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S.com and use code audio at checkout. What I'm saying for me is that that's not a diagnosis that I want to make a part of my identity. I hear you. I'm just yeah so and you know what the it's funny because I talk in a lot of these

talks that I do I mean I just gave a mental health talk to the American Correctional Association that's like 1500 correctional officers right and talking about my mom's experience talking about my experience growing up offering my perspective and thoughts about things and and one of the things that I talk about is language. And how language is, I mean, the mental health field, the psychiatry in particular, has come so far. I mean, my mom's thing was we have to destigmatize. And you even see it now that NFL football ad was so great about, you know, destigmatizing it and everything else.

But in a, not but, also in a way, that project of destigmatizing has worked in a lot of, lot of areas, maybe not in all areas, but, you know, if you go to, if you go to Indiana where my wife is from, people are more than comfortable talking about their medications, you know, and oh, I'm going to go to CVS to get my medication. Oh, I have, and somehow it's like, it's a little bit more socially acceptable now for people to use that phrase. And that, that should be encouraging to anybody who has an issue that, like, oh, there's a lot of places in this world you can go where you are, where someone with that diagnosis is fully understood and accepted to be a total human being and it's not going to limit your life.

And that's exciting. That's exciting. It's thrilling. But the vocabulary of psychiatry actually in a lot of ways is meant to be used between physicians and between physicians and the drug. world, in pharmaceutical world, and the nursing community and administrative people. And there's a lot of people for whom the vocabulary of mental illness is really efficient and proper and throwing everything else.

But it totally fucks up a lot of people, you know, actual human beings who are actually being diagnosed because in a lot of ways, it's like a death sentence for people. It feels like that. brand like branding you know it's like this is this you're labeled this is who you are well that but also just just you know they they they call one of the words is uh well patient your mental health patient but you're also uh they use the word sufferer oh this person's a mental health sufferer and you're like Jesus Christ how is anybody supposed to develop like wellness in their life if they're constantly thinking of themselves indefinitely as a patient or indefinitely as

a sufferer. Like, that vocabulary is not helpful. That people should... Suffer is not something people want to associate themselves with. I am a sufferer. And survivor and recovery. And like, those words can be very, very helpful and very empowering and very useful, particularly at certain phases of people's discovery of their own, like, wellness strategy. But for a lot of people, it makes it so. they don't want to get a diagnosis, they don't want to go to the doctor. They don't want to consider the types of medications that might be available to them. They don't want to consider it because they just don't like the vibe.

And to me, the community could do itself a big service by acknowledging that its communication skills are like the lagging thing in their progress. And so what I was saying was in terms of stigma, it actually is still there in a way. Like, if you have your druthers, pick that diagnosis, you know, talk about that diagnosis or not, I get a lot of positive feedback when I say to people when they ask me what you're asking me, like you don't have to, and relative to my kids, relative to anybody, you don't have to tell anyone what your diagnosis is. You know, first thing, the willingness, the bravery it takes to put yourself up for some kind of evaluation to see if some sort of diagnosis is, you know, appropriate for you.

That takes courage. It's terrifying for people to do that. And then, but doing that and then getting the diagnosis, that's just the doctor's half of the equation. You have to accept the diagnosis. And if you're willing, you know, if the diagnosis isn't right for you and you don't accept it, you know, good for you that you went through a process where you are more armed with information than you were beforehand.

If you get a diagnosis and you're willing to accept it because it's helpful to you, then that's great too. Yeah, I agree with that. But then when it comes time to sharing your process and your experience, some people aren't like us. Some people don't feel good. Some people's work environment, for example, is not conducive. If you were to, you know, you may be legally protected, but it might make people uncomfortable because they have some, who knows what. So you people have to decide for themselves if and when they seek a diagnosis, they get a diagnosis, they accept a diagnosis, and they share a diagnosis. Each one of those things, guess who's in charge?

Guess who's the boss of each one of those moments? You, you're the boss of your moment. You get to say whether you're going to go get a diet, unless you find yourself in that situation because of circumstances that you're unable to control. But choosing to get a diagnosis, getting the – and by the way, it takes a lot of people – it's much, much faster now. I don't know what the newest statistics are with the psychiatric institute of America or whoever. I'm sure it's within like 18 months or something like that, but that's just me spitballing. But it used to be when my mom was alive, when she was in the mid-80s, it would take like eight years to get an accurate diagnosis. Eight years of suffering.

Yeah, that's shit. And, you know, by the way, doctors can be assholes, you know, doctors can be, and you never want to push away the possibility that someone could get help from a physician or a psychiatric professional, but they've come a long way too. They used to be real assholes. Like, as a class, maybe not totally, maybe I was insulated from it. But my experience of people was that they were so arrogant and condescending and dismissive. and unpleasant.

Unsupportive. Yeah, unless it was in their way. You know, and now I've seen physicians, by and large now what I've been exposed to, and it's anecdotal, so people have to make up their own minds and choose their own thing. But, like, there is some humility that has worked its way into the system. Absolutely. Because now people don't have the same, their education, the physicians, their education, there's so much that they don't know and that they don't understand

and it's obvious to anyone that they don't know and they don't understand it that it's like, well, this is what we do know, this is what we do understand and we want to help you with this, but there's a lot of stuff we don't know. So I find that humility when it's expressed by physicians terribly reassuring because I'd much rather have somebody tell me that they don't know something rather than hedge or foot

or use their personality or intimidation or something like that, you know, to, to compel me to do something or to obfuscate the fact that they aren't on 100% sure footing with what they're saying. You're on point today. You're very passionate and fiery about this, and I like it because you're passionate. Very passionate about it. And I really, I appreciate that. Listen, this is called shit talking with Sean Aston. That kind of goes with your name.

Shit talking with Sean Aston. my wife would concur these are questions for my patrons uh rapid fire or you know if you really want to uh go a little longer feel free but it's rapid fire sophie m if you could have 50 50 first dates which i know you were in what would your ideal date be to do over and over sit in a bathtub with your wife that's where i went that's right where i went with your wife i mean with you and your wife honestly this is true before uh covid's missing year. Oh, there's something else I want to share with you, but a date. You do, what would your ideal date be to do over and over, I guess that, you know. Honestly, there's a place we go in Hawaii and we can either take our little golf cart or we can walk down to where the beachside grill is. And we sit there and we have a little drink and, yeah, just.

walking together sun sun kissed and walking down to the you know at at sunset you just got warm and fuzzy thinking of your wife after 30 years of marriage i'm like we're going to i'm like we're going to go either in the bathtub or to why maybe just take the bathtub there's a bathtub in hawai just so you know probably there's one of the thing i want to tell you yeah go ahead so covid there's like epochs the guitar period i got better at the guitar not enough i thought about bringing it in here but not enough to bring it in here last something Okay, wait, hold on. Oh, yeah.

Hey, Mr. Tambourine, man, play a song for me. I'm not sleepy, and there's no place that I'm going to. Hey, Mr. Tambourine man, play a song for me. I love it, though. It's sweet. You know, you enjoy it. I could see you enjoy playing guitar. You keep doing it.

Play more. Um, um, um, um, um, uh, so there was that, then my union got into a, uh, there was a whole thing with, uh, stuff going on with the union business. And I got deeply invested in that for a couple months. And then, oh, look at this. What happened? The dog's here, guys. The dogs here. Oh, my gosh. Look at that little monster. Look at those ears. What's her name? What's her name again? Holly. Holly. You didn't know her name. I know her name. dad's one of our tricks is to make it like we're stupid and so they're like oh he's just pretending he's stupid and then when we really are stupid which is most of the time they can't tell the difference okay next question lisa h in insino man what was it like to work with polly shore honestly and any thoughts for teaming up to making an insino man too the older years we have all

indicated that we would be more than happy to do a sequel um personally i want to know what Betty Nugs looks like 30 years later. So that was one of the, that was a cave girl that came up at the end of the movie and the tagging movie. I remember. What about Polly? Polly was really focused,

really knew his audience. He was really kind of at a sweet spot in his life and his career. Where he, he was, he was ambitious. He was kind of like, the opposite of his character. So he didn't talk to you in off camera like,

Hey, Shawnee, what's up, bud? What did he do with that, Bob? No, he was just very protective of the fact that he had his hit MTV show and this thing was going on and he didn't want, he was just protective of it. So no, he would talk to me, but we didn't get on that great because I didn't really want to be doing the movie. Wait, you didn't get along that great.

Well, I mean, whatever. we got i mean it wasn't like there wasn't any bad anything but he knew you didn't want to do it so there was a little bit like uh he didn't even want to be here no i was kind of like i had done some movies that were substantial movies right like what besides goonies and rudy and uh i did memphis bell in like historical in like history on the historical record but memphis bell was a movie that i did that was i think kind of an important movie it was uh uh kind of a love letter to veterans of the the air war in Europe. And it was David Putnam, you know, who did Cherries of Fire and the mission. It was a very memorable movie. But he, but you didn't, it took a lot to get you to do this

scheduling and you weren't as passionate. So there probably was a little bit of animosity or whatever. I get it, right? Not animosity. Just like how I thrown that word at you. I just threw it out like you're like, yeah. We just, we just were like on different pages. But like, Like, Brendan Fraser and I would play video games in the dressing room. Awesome. We'd be like, and cut, and we'd run to the dressing room and go in the dressing room and play a video game. You know, like, we bonded like that.

Later in life and times, Polly and I, I think, like, we like each other. Like, we're, I think we'd be happy to be interacting together. And I think I, my, I appreciated who he was and what he was doing at that time, but it just was not my scene. I'm just not the, like, guys going to, like, play a bunch of college campuses. and, you know, talk about, you know, and just be hitting on all kinds of girls. And I don't know, it just wasn't my vibe.

But I got why it was why he had the audience. I got why it was fun and funny for him. I just was, it was me. I was the problem. I wasn't the problem. Maddie S. You've had an awesome career playing the underdog morally good characters. If you could choose, what type and or characteristics of a villain

would you love to portray on screen? Maybe the vulnerability, you know, it's a really weird thing when someone can kill people and yet they're you're like you feel for them you're like wow that's coming from a place of pain you know because mostly you just think like shoot that person and get them out of society right but if you're if you're if you're an actor and you're studying like what goes into a villain I mean I don't know I don't know maybe I don't know that's just the first thing that occurs to me is that you know most actors who play villains tell you that they've got to find a way to find something about them to connect with.

And I think that vulnerability, that sense of or or, or, um, injustice. I'm like a, I'm like an injusticeaholic. If I see injustice anywhere, it makes me so upset. It makes me so, even like a kid getting bullied or the country getting bullied or whatever it is, I, it just, it just makes my blood boil. And I, and I, so, you know, to have a. a baddie who would feel a righteous sense of indignation and like they're doing what they're doing because they were wronged and they feel like it's the right thing to do i don't know and then you know

usually there's some grotesque perversion inside of them that makes them a villain but rosy rosy asks this you always play great roles sweet roles guys you like have you ever worked with anyone that really bothered you that was hard to work with difficult to work with and that was volatile on set there's one actor who there's only one time i ever walked off a set like i'm a professional my mother was a professional you know she she taught me at eight years old and 10 years old, you know, how to hit your mark and can know where your light is and know your lines and be better for the other person off camera than you are on camera and you're on camera. Like just the kind of nobility of professionalism.

And that's what I've always, it's always been in my soul. Even when I'm cocky, I still think I have that somewhere. But there was this one actor who was playing this like tortured, angry person. and there was a scene where there's a group of people on one side and that person on the other side I don't want to describe it too specifically but the person with a prop they used the prop violently

too much like they were not careful the thing shattered and could have gone in people's eyes and it was like unprofessional and I walked over to the director and I just whispered to the director, you better handle that. And the director looked at me like,

like, I don't understand what you're saying. I was like, did you just see what happened? He goes, yeah. I said, are you going to address that? And he goes, I think it's great stuff. I said, bye. And I walked out. And he chased me down the street to the thing.

And he said, I don't understand. I don't understand. I said, what just happened was unsafe. I was like, in order to work in an environment, it has to be safe. I was like, so instead of punching you in the fucking face, I decided to walk away and let you continue your unsafe behavior without me. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry. I didn't understand. Did you see it break? Yes. Did was it planned to be broken? No. Could that chip have hit that person in the face? Well, could it? Yeah, I guess it could have. Yes. Did you ask that person if they felt that could have gone in their face? Go ask them if they

felt that could if they were scared. We're actors. You know, there's, there's a way in which we are you know, our fear, we tap into genuine fear for it to work. But the kind of fear that comes from, you know, an out-of-control actor breaking something and almost injuring somebody is not okay. So I walked out. Well, that actor came out sobbing and so upset. And so I ended up hugging the actor and talking through it. So it worked out.

It worked out at the end. It was just a big. It worked out. We went back in there. So that's not exactly like, you know, was there some human being? I'm sure there have been human beings that I was like not that much of a fan of them as a human being. But that's the thought that came into my mind. Wait, I have to tell you this other thing.

The third epoch, the guitar epoch, union epoch. I got into grad school for six months. I've been studying public policy and public administration at American University online. What? Are you taking classes and getting grades? Are you doing well? So far, but this interview is putting me behind. I want a dick

I love it No yeah no I'm doing well it is It is incredibly hard It's much much much much harder than I ever thought it would be My brain is constantly being just bent in ways I didn't I mean one class was Administrative Law

I did two months of administrative law Reading probably 120 cases of Supreme Court decisions Oh my like Wow and writing about it and then studying, you know, all about... CBS Raptor, 1973. It's something I've always wanted to do. It's something I don't think I probably ever...

The only time I ever got close was when I was doing stranger things. I had such a small part in it that I was studying for the GRE, like at my hotel room, day after day after day, waiting to go to work for 10 minutes. And then I got a job that took me out of the country and I couldn't, I didn't fall through with it. So this actually, in a way, the pandemic. has provided an opportunity for me that is a lifelong dream dude i'm proud of you that's awesome i could see how happy you are doing it which makes me incredibly happy all right this is it man this is these are rapid now you just answer them quickly here we go last few uh shit talking with sean ashton leanne when my brother

was 18 he was diagnosed with bipolar disorder i had no idea what that was i read your mom's book a brilliant madness really helped me gain perspective and understand my brother and his struggles a little better so that was just a statement thanking you well yeah amen i thank her too i've had so many people say the same thing to me the big this isn't rapid fire but the biggest one was at a nursing home where my uh retirement home i guess um where my wife's grandfather was we went to visit him when i came out of his room this nurse saw me barely any time to register who who it was the human that was in front of her but she locked eyes on me and then she almost like physically collapsed and I had to, like, grab her.

So I was, like, holding her up. Like, your knees are shaking, trying to hold this lady up. And she's sobbing. And she basically said the same thing that she just said. Was it Leanne? What was it? Yeah. So where it was her father who was suicidal and he had a crush on my mom on her TV show in the 60s.

And he gave him her book. And he read the book in one sitting and stood up and said, I don't, I want to live. I want to live now. So, you know, that book was a, in our family, it was, this, the cause of a lot of, uh, Sturman Drang, is that the word, the German word, there's a lot of hassle. I'm a Jew, I don't know if that's the word, brothers were not happy, dad was not happy. It was, it was, there was a lot of stuff in it that people didn't like. Um, but then over time,

that pain from inside the family kind of went away. And this is the legacy of that book is it helps people, which is amazing. Maya P. Rapid Fire. What's your proudest moment as an actor? The one moment that pops in your head when one that got best picture Lord of the Rings was that it yeah on the volcano in the Lord of the Rings yeah yeah but that was a lot a lot went into that moment but yeah I mean like a lifetime went into that moment but as the as a you know I also the movement of Rudy where Rudy gets accepted into Notre Dame that was a huge breakthrough for me huge breakthrough if it wasn't for that then the Lord of the Rings moment would not have been the same

beautiful Mary B your last visit inside of you really touch my soul. People say that nice guys can't make it in Hollywood. You seem nice enough. How do you keep balanced? How do you keep from straying from your moral center? And you've answered that in so many ways. So in one sentence, how could you sum that up? You got to know your way back to your moral center. Everybody, nobody lives pinned in a moral certainty. So my wife shows me the way back to it. way back find you way back to your how do you know that song uh yeah there's another song that is one of my favorite songs on this thing go on that you have one more question right uh yeah i mean what you do to stay a positive ray h i mean you know obviously you know you're with your

family you're doing this new thing online and uh doing something you've loved so it kind of you kind of answered that one my wife has this philosophy you know her knee she has a need problem. She's needed a knee surgery, maybe a full knee replacement since before COVID. So her entire COVID has been limping. But she says that she makes a conscious decision, and I've seen her do this. There's times, you know, imagine, she's got four kids, our three daughters and me, and dogs, lots of dogs. And it's like she is, she's the gravity. She's the center of gravity for our family. And, but it's not. always easy and it's not always fun and she you know to help she gives to the girls with their homework

with their studies or online studies um is incredible and she says that she makes a conscious decision in the morning when she puts her feet on the ground that it's going to be a good day that is very important there's many times where i just go hey i have these little signs next to my bed that says breathe it's okay life's good you only get one let's go fuck i'm with i'm withdrawing your privilege of having anxiety for one year. You're saying that I can't, you're not a lot. You can have a little bit of anxiety, but when you reach a certain ceiling of it, Sean is there going, it's not today.

You know, I'm probably think of that now. I'll probably think, oh, you're getting anxious. I'm like, no, Sean wouldn't allow that. You're allowed to be who you want to be, but I just, you are such, your soul, so good, dude. And anybody who has a soul that's as good as yours, deserves not to have an unreasonable amount of stress and anxiety. I'm working.

Look, I love you for saying that. And I really do. And I respect you. And I miss you. And I, I'm working on it, man. Sometimes things just happen.

And you're, you're so overwhelmed by them that you don't know where to begin again. And you feel like you're going. It's the same shit. It's the same. You know, it's just part of like, this is what you do, dude.

This is what you do. Wait a minute. wait a minute you might have just found a the path to your own salvation there you just said you don't know where to go to begin again where can you go to begin again what's a reliable place for you to go to begin again if you can figure that out and everyone gets overwhelmed everyone has you know problems and whatever but at the moment where you go like wait I got to know where to go again. Have a place.

You know what? That's brilliant. That is brilliant. I'm going to find that place because, let me tell you something, man. This is the end of this podcast, but I will say I feel better than I did when we started. I felt like I don't know if I could do this.

I'm really not in the mood. I'm a little lightheaded. I just feel tired, a little, you know, whatever. You know, I get in my head. I just felt like shit. And then after talking to you for 30 minutes, the first 30, I completely had a shift. Did you notice my shift, Ryan?

It's just, if you watch this video again, you'll see the shift from, because you comfort me, man. I love you, man. I love you, too. Hey, give me a little made-up. The dizzy is you just have to feel like a jazz musician. Go with it.

You just have to feel like a jazz. Hey, real quick, play an end outro to, this was inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum podcast. With Sean asked, just make up something. Oh, okay. inside of you this was inside of you oh that's the one i did last time i like that this has been inside of you hey listen i love you and i can't thank you enough for coming on again will you come on once a year yeah once a year man i'm your man listen when this is all over when i'm allowed to your house i want to come

and just hang out and meet the family i really haven't got a chance to do that the uh the mars pod this is like i feel like we're living in one of those biodomes that they set up like can the astronaut survive for a year in the yeah so come on out to our dome see there may just be bodies it may not even be that that sounds appealing all right i love you buddy thanks for allow me to be inside of you again love my love to your family and keep doing that course i love that you're doing that. I'm going to get a degree, baby. I'm going to get a master's degree.

I just, what can you say about this guy that hasn't been said? I mean, he's just, he's done it all. He's a, and he's a family man. Seriously. And he just stays so humble and sweet. I was looking over here because this is where the Rudy poster used to be. Oh, yeah, the Rudy poster, but then I turned it into horror movie posters now. Well, you got a theme, which is fine.

Yeah, yeah. Yeah, that's where. If you check it out on YouTube, you'll see that I have a Lost Boys original poster signed by Kiefer and Jason and Evil Dead signed by Bruce Campbell and a Fright Night poster signed by the director Tom Holland. I just love movies and love horror and some people make fun of me for having these things, but Kurt Russell signed by The Thing and Escape from New York posters. Aliens posters signed by the cast.

I think these are cool things. You may not. You may think you are a dork Rosenbaum, but you know what? You're jealous. That's it. We're all just jealous. We're all just jealous. Once again, if you want to listen to my band, the album just came out.

I really do think you're going to like it. If it was crappy, I would not tell you to listen, but you can get the CD and you can get a lot of other great stuff. Beanie, trucker hats, lunchboxes, coasters, all on the sunspin.com website. That's correct. And you could also get all the amazing inside of you with Michael Rosenbaum, pictures from inside of you of Michael Rosenbaum or Lex Luthor pictures, flash pictures. even sorority boys pictures they can get all this stuff at the inside of you online store lex shirts there's just so much great stuff out there so i mean if you think that stuff's great i want to say thank you again for listening and please subscribe as ryan told you you know the handles um if you

listen to the beginning i don't think you're going to start listening to this podcast at the end so uh always looking for more uh people so if you if you like this podcast tell a friend and um have them listen if you were here for uh sean ashton hopefully you'll come back next week for whoever it is. We're trying to get bigger and bigger guests. And that is always what we're striving. Good guests, I should say. We're just trying to get good guests.

At the end of the day, you want a good guest. I'd rather have a good guest than a big guest, wouldn't you? Yeah. But you seem to, you've done a good job, especially lately of like getting, getting it out. Like if there's ever any doubt in anyone's mind that like, oh, you know, you find the angle and you get in and you really do. They're all good episodes. Thanks, Ryan. Yeah, man. Well, thank you. And you edit them. And that means a lot. I try to, again, I tried to think like just regular human beings, not like some actor going, hey, let's, I just really try to ask questions that I'm interested in and kind of go down the little rabbit holes of. Well, you start there and then it always ends up with the human story. I mean, I hope. That's the goal. So keep listening. You get there. Listen to Ryan. Well, you listen to the boy. It always happens. Yes. The goods are in there. They're always in there.

The goods are in there. Goods. Well, I appreciate that. I appreciate all the letters that you guys write me on hello at inside of you podcast.com. They're awesome. I read them all the time. If I don't respond to you, I just, I don't respond to everybody. I can't possibly.

But I read them and I'm touched by them. So if you want to leave any messages, hello at inside of you podcast.com, I believe it is. And you can leave messages there. Sometimes people say, oh, I just made an order, but I gave the wrong address. I'm like, well, chances are I didn't look at that in time. And I sent it to the wrong address. So I don't know what to tell you Sometimes I send free stuff

There was a smudge once A little smudge But the dude's a collector I got it so I was like look Send it back I'll give you some extra goodies and stuff I'll sign it I'll make it better

I mean then they could just clone you They can just take your DNA Just take your little fingerprints I always try to it I always try to do the right thing I always try to make everybody happy And that's my problem Because I can't make everybody happy

You can please some of the people Some of the time A few of the people A few of the time But you can't please all the people all the time that's just the way it goes no i don't know uh again my patrons who make this show possible in so many ways first of all thank you westwood one thank you ryan for amazing editing and engineering bryce for producing and really sticking with me sticking with me

guys uh i appreciate it i love the podcast a lot of people who really love the podcast so um i want to thank those guys for sticking with the podcast my patrons if you want to join patreon again patreon patreon.com slash inside i'll message you back as soon as possible uh here Here are the wonderful top tier patrons who I send the merch every three months or every four months and I, you know, write little personalized notes and hopefully they're enjoying their time as a top tier patron. And also thank you for coming to stage a few weeks back and supporting the band. We play every last Saturday of the month, 2 p.m. and 6 p.m. Pacific Standard Time Show. Here are the patrons. Nancy D. Mary B. Leah S. Trisha F. Sarah V. L. Lisa, you could go. Jill E. Brian H. Lauren G. Nico P. You can see them right here.

on YouTube. Look at this. It's just amazing technology. Wow. Robin S. Jerry W. Robert I. Jason W. Apothean. Apothean. Kristen K. Amelia O. Allison O. Allison L. Jess J. Lucas M. Rage C. Joshua D. Emily S. C.J.P. Samantha. M. Jennifer N. Jackie P. Stacey L. Carly H. Carly S. Jan S. Jamal F, Janelle B, Carrie B, Tab of the 272, not to be confused with 273, that's correct, Jesus. Ashley Ryan, Kimberly, Mike, Emerson, N, Eldon Supremo, Dan, Jack S, love you, Ramira, Beth B, Santiago, M, Sarah F, Chad, W, Lian, P, Ray A, Maya P, Maya P, Maesia C, Maddie S, Kendra G, Kendra, Ashley, E, Shannon D, Matt W, Belinda, Ann, Kevin V, Kevin V,

James R. Chris H. Osbue. Osbjorn. Ashbein. Ashbyn. Amy C. Dave H. Samantha S. Spider-Man, Chase, Sheila G. Ray H. Alyssa C. Tab of the T. Misha H. Tom Ann. Henry S. K. K.D. F. Lillianna B. Michael S. T. T. T. T. L. L. L. L. L. H. And there's the last patrons. John S. Andrew T. Can we have music, please? Claire M, Liz J, Laura L, Chad, L, Rachel E, Randall, Taylor K, Neil A, Marion, E, Meg K, Janelle P, Dan N, Jennifer J, Wayne M, Diane R, Ojetta, Lorraine G, Olga C, Corey M, K, Fronica K, Big Stevie W, and Kendall T. Those are the top-tier patrons, and I thank you for the continued support and love, and I hope you are continuing to love the show. and um i try to message you when i can it's it's it's not easy let's do a youtube live soon too we got to play some music in a request line so my patrons make sure you come to the youtube live right now we only get a couple hundred where you'd think all the patrons would come to it but they're busy they have things going on in the lives people got stuff to do people got shit to do man uh thank you for allowing me to be inside of each and every one of you from my home in the Hollywood Hills of California.

I was trying to do trumpets, like the show tune. Keep doing it. I'm Michael Rosenbaum. I'm Ryan Tears. Yep, and we love you guys. And we have a little wave to the camera. Hey, thanks so much for joining me on this Tuesday. I know you guys are busy or whatever day it is on your way to work on your way home.

If you're having a tough day, I wish you the best day. I hope it gets better. It will get better. We got to make the most out of this. life that we're given, and I appreciate everybody and all their support. Thanks. Football season is here. Believe has the podcast to enhance your football experience from the pros. One of the most interesting quarterback rooms to college.

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