Is It Just Me? - #104: When Coombs Met KAK

Episode Date: May 8, 2022

We're baaaack, idiots! (And we're looking for a new nickname to call you other than 'idiots' lmao)   In this episode: Churi’s HACKER fiasco (06:47) The arsonist from Mitchell’s high school (13:31) When you’re running late and get EVERY red light (16:36) Talkback Tingz - Slipping dirty words on air (20:58) I can help... We’re BOYCOTTING BANANAS (33:29) When Coombs met Kerri-Anne (42:16) Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (54:26)   Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. Would you like to try a vape? Why would you take up something that is going to be addictive and expensive? I think for people. I'll tell you why. Yeah. Because you're young and stupid. Some things make more sense than others.

You mentioned that your goal was to be healthy, and I just don't know how you figure that's going to happen when you're ordering a chocolate mousse. No. You know, I had it in the car on the way home, and I didn't have a spoon. So I was like an armadillo trying to get ants out of a hole. Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood.

Being fingered is an awful sensation. You haven't been fingered by the right person. Goodness me. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of bitches. Hi, it's Jenna. Please don't forget to include my name in the opener this season. I'm sorry.

Ta-da! Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coombs. Oh, guess who's back? We're back. Hi, everyone. I'm Mitchell Coombs. I missed you, darling. Me too.

You know, we joked before Easter. We were like, oh, is this a break from each other as well? Are we not going to talk? We barely did. Turns out it was. Yeah, it was. That was the last time I'd seen you, and this is the first time I've seen you since that moment. Have I gotten more beautiful over time?

Your hair looks denser. And you're glowing. You could use any adjective in the world, but dense. I don't know if I like that. No one goes to the hairdresser and goes, give me something dense. It's not dense enough. It's not to be like pubic hair. Our third wheel,

Prizekeeper Jenna's here. Can you Google the definition of dense? Yes. Hi, Jenna. She's finally started bringing it. Yes. The laptop for the Googling purposes. So dense means closely compacted in substance.

Yeah. See, it's a compliment. You've got beautiful thick hair. Yes. Oh, okay. That's better than dense. Yeah, it's true. I guess no one's like, you want to take my dense dick?

Like, it's always thick. You know what I mean? Yeah, that's what you want. In hot talk. Maybe I'll try that out with Hayden. I'm like, you want these dense willy? Do you talk dirty to each other on the phone? Because how funny would it be if you called him right now and said, babe, I can't wait

for you. Actually, no, just send him a message right now and just say, babe, I can't wait to come home tonight to your dense dick. Okay, you can see our chat. He said, I just had lunch alone. Everyone at work's gone. I said, here's my lunch. I haven't had it yet.

He said, I've got meetings to do. I'll see you tonight. So this is perfect. So what do I say? Also, side note, wow, you really share everything with each other, don't you? This is my lunch. He said a sad face. I'm having lunch alone.

So I said, so am I. Doesn't he work from home? It'd be worse if there was someone coming over, darling. No, no, no. Back in the office, two days a week. TMI. Okay, so what should I say? Just say, because he wrote, see you tonight.

Yes, I'll see you tonight. Just say, can't wait to get home and crawl into bed alongside you and your dense dick. What are you laughing at, Jenna? It's a beautiful message. I'd be thrilled to receive that. Crawl into bed? Or maybe lay in bed. Yeah.

I said, can't wait to come home tonight and crawl into bed and cuddle my guy and his dense dick. I sent it to. Oh, nice. Put the mic back to your mouth. Oh my God. It's delivered. Okay.

Well, let's see what he says to that. All right. Well, my phone's on loud, so you'll hear it, everyone. God, I have so much to update you all on since the break. I haven't even spoken to either of you about my run-in with Kerry-Ann Kennelly. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Should I save that for later?

Save it for later. Save it for later. Okay, great. We're also doing another Talk Back Tings today. Yep, we are. A bit of a fan favourite with you, Trashbags. Time was classic. I just said Trashbags, wrong podcast.

Excuse me? Did you? Yeah, I did. Sorry. That's disgusting. Not Trashbags. No one said trash bags, wrong podcast. Excuse me? Did you? Yeah, I did. Sorry. That's disgusting. Not trash bags. No one will understand that, of course. You have to listen to the show to get that reference.

I mean, it's not like the name for our listeners is much nicer. Idiots. Also, that sort of just came out of nothing. Like, we really, should we name, should we let them choose their own name? We call them idiots. Not a bad idea, actually, because in all honesty, I've noticed in recent months that I've had so many people come up to me and say, oh, my God, Mitchell, I'm a trash bag.

But I've never, ever had someone say, guess what, Mitchell, I'm an idiot. People come up and say they listen to the podcast all the time. They just never take ownership of the name idiot. Oh, my God. I have to say I'm an idiot at a, and I was the idiot because I was out drinking in Sydney with Hayden the other night, and I go to the bar, and I'm a bit tipsy, so I'm extra extroverted. I was like, look at this bar.

What are these cocktails? Do you make these from scratch? Like, really being a dick at the bar. Like, do you have fresh maraschino cherries? Oh, God. And he goes, can I ask you a question? I go, yeah. He goes, are you Mitch Chury?

Is this the guy behind the bar? Behind the bar. And I go, yeah. He goes, are you Mitch Cherry? Is this the guy behind the bar? Behind the bar. And I go, yeah. He goes, oh, my God. I love Is It Just Me? Let me shout you a drink. This is on me. And I go, oh, no, you don't have to do that.

He went, okay. Oh, no, no. I'm pretty sure there's one more. One more. No, no, no, please. Yeah, you've got to play a bit of table tennis. Lob it back and forth. And then eventually he'll go, no, no, I insist.

Throw me a bone. He just pulled it right out. So then I ended up paying for my own drink from a fan. But anyway. If you're listening, fuck you. That was the worst Negroni I've ever had. Prick. No, I've got some updates too.

There's a lot going on. So we'll do a little update. Well, it's been a while. Our Easter break was a bit extended. It was fun, but I'm good to be back. I've missed you guys. That was my fault. Sorry, I did.

We were only going to take a couple of weeks, but then I said, no, I need to focus on be back. I've missed you guys. That was my fault. Sorry, I did. We were only going to take a couple of weeks, but then I said, no, I need to focus on my award-winning stand-up shows. Yeah, the award was brilliant. Sorry, award-winning sell-out stand-up shows. Oh, a round of applause. Yes, well done. A round of applause.

I'm guessing that's why neither of you could come to Sydney Comedy Festival because it was sold out. It was sold out. The tickets were sold out. We couldn't go. Now, I've noticed that my audience, they leave shit to the last minute. Literally the morning of the show, tickets are at like 60% capacity, and then by the nighttime they're sold out.

Like they leave it to the actual last minute. Is that what you notice? People would buy them the day of? Yeah, the day of. That's funny. And so I go months in the lead up with the worst ego thinking, oh, my God, no one's coming, and then the day of. They're like, ah, fine, I will.

I guess I can muster up the effort. Well, if it is your first time listening, this is Is It Just Me? We start the show the same way it hasn't changed in 104 episodes with two Is It Just Me's each, something that we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Mitch doesn't know mine. I don't know Mitch's. And that's the base of the show. We also have an Is It Just You coming up.

It's your chance to get on the show. Fabulous. We spring them on each other. Who's going to go first? I'll go first because this is something that happened to me and actually happened to Hayden but me because, you know, just by association over the break. And it's actually not very funny.

It's a serious idjim. Oh, all right then. All right. Change gears, Jenna. We've got to take this seriously. Okay. Yeah, close the laptop. You're about to get emotional.

What's wrong, Jonathan? Let's jump in. Is it just me? Oh, he just replied. Sorry. Hayden just replied. Oh, breaking news. Oh, he replied.

Breaking. Oh, my God. What did he say? He said sorry in all capitals. As in sorry? What? Oh, no. Okay.

So, no, he's not accustomed to that sort of dirty talk. Oh, that was Coombs. Oh, that's so good. Should we do that again? Sorry. One more take. one more take. One more take. Is it just me?

Are you someone that is extremely calm during emergencies? Yeah, actually, I am. Yes. Well, that doesn't surprise me, but I feel like Hayden claims that he's shocked every time that there's an emergency at how calm I am. I'm shocked that you would be calm too. I'm very calm. I'm very level-headed. But I suppose in that relationship, you emergency and how calm I am. I'm shocked that you would be calm too. I'm very calm. I'm very level-headed.

But I suppose in that relationship you'd have to be. Yes. I feel like he'd be like, ah! No, I think he just, you know, he freaks a little bit and I have no choice but to go into fight or flight, is that what they call it? Yeah. I'm a fighter.

Like, I will stay there. I'm not running off. Anyway, Hayden, I've actually got some music for this story. Yeah. Hayden was hacked during the break. Just to set the scene. His social media was hacked? Oh, everything was hacked.

His Big Pond email was hacked. I can't believe they still exist. I know. He still has a modem. No, we were at the movies, right, during the break, going to see, I don't know what the fuck it was, everything, everywhere, all at once, whatever that film is. And we were waiting in line to get popcorn. Yeah.

And Hayden's phone goes off. And he goes, oh, that's weird. I go, what is it? He goes, oh, my email. I just got, please, it's two-factor authentication. Like, use this code. He went, I'm not trying to get in, but it could be something at TikTok. I'll leave it.

And he gets another notification two minutes later. Your password's successfully been changed. Oh, no. Oh, no. And then Hayden still, it doesn't click that it's a problem. It's like, oh, yeah, that happens all the time. I go, what do you mean that happens all the time? That does not happen all the time, Hayden.

I click into gear. I freak out. I'm like, well, no, that's not normal. Like, give me your phone. I go, just try to log into your big pond. Goes to log in. His password is incorrect. Someone's changed his password.

Why would they come for his big pond of all things? Yeah, I know. What are they going to get, his Telstra bill? Yeah. Big war. So then he goes, oh, I freak. What are they going to get, his Telstra bill? Yeah. Big war. So then he goes, oh, I freak out. I go, we need to call Telstra. So he's on the phone to Telstra and he's on speakerphone and they go, oh, Hayden, thank

you for calling back. And we go, back? What do you mean calling back? They go, well, you just called 30 minutes ago and we fixed the problem. What? We fixed the other problem. And we go, no, we didn't call 30 minutes ago. And he was freaking.

And I was just sitting there trying to guide him through. And they go, yeah, you called 30 minutes ago, and you said that you were down on holidays, and you didn't have your laptop or your phone, but you needed to access your password. So they reset it for you. Oh, that's dodgy. And we went, no, no, no, what do you mean?

And they went, yeah, but you provided your mum's maiden name, your date of birth, and your email, and they changed the password to a hacker. What? So we go, oh, my God, we were freaking out. How did they know the mum's maiden name and everything? So we go, oh, my God, we were freaking out. We were scared. How did they know the mum's maiden name and everything? It gets worse. Oh, my God.

I feel like, what's that girl's name on NCIS? The emo one. The emo one with all the hair clips in? Avril Lavigne or something. What's her name? Buffy, I think. Always in leather. And it's always hot.

They're in Miami and she's in a leather trench coat. And the boots too. Oh, Becky. Abby. Abby. Oh, yeah. Oh, Becky. Abby. Abby. Oh, yeah. She's the forensic one. Anyway, so then we go, okay, I guess we'll sort that out next.

Then I get a text message from a friend. Hey, are you across what's going on on Hayden's Instagram? Oh, no. I go, what do you mean? So then I run to his Instagram, search Hayden not coming up. I go, oh, they've deleted his profile. Oh, no. They've just changed it to Meowing Monster 2387.

I saw that. Uploaded a photo of a club penguin penguin. I had no idea what was going on. With a wig on, with a caption Meow. Are there any suspects at this point? Like, do you know who would have done that, that knew the maiden name, knew the date of birth? There was one penguin I went to school with that I didn't see eye to eye with.

But no one at this point. So he's freaking. Because, you know, he works at TikTok. He's social media. And they access his Instagram. They deleted like 20 photos, unfollowed me, which was very weird, which is a clue. Take that and write that down. So it's somebody who's really jealous of you.

One of his old roots. Maybe. That's why I generally haven't spoken since. I could be a detective. It is one of the old roots. Because how else would he know all those details? Well, here's the next part. Then they get into his Facebook.

And he starts getting notifications on all his social media. Log in alert. Log in alert. Log in alert. They're going for everything. They get into his Facebook. Change his password. And we're freaking out.

Then we're trying to call Instagram. We're trying to call Facebook. Then he gets a message from a friend. He goes, hey, you need to check your LinkedIn. Even LinkedIn? Even LinkedIn. They went for the jugular. I wouldn't he gets a message from a friend. He goes, hey, you need to check your LinkedIn. Even LinkedIn? Even LinkedIn. They went for the jugular. I wouldn't even think to come for a LinkedIn.

So we check his LinkedIn. This is actually where it gets really bad. They post racial slurs to LinkedIn. They use a bad word. Really bad word. Then they post, hey, quitting my job at TikTok to become a stripper. Hope my dad's proud of me. Oh, my God.

I know. So I've got like, and then Hayden at the time is going, oh, you know, I think they're in my LinkedIns and the lady on Telstra is going, oh, well, let's just do one thing at a time. And I go, give me the phone! I go, you listen here! It sounds like Hayden was actually the calm one in the emergency.

He was shaking. It was too many things happening. He was saying, oh, don't worry about it. It's fine. Oh, yeah. I went full Bowser. I was like, you fix this. I'm like, escalate me. He went, no worries, sir. Upgrading you to the diamond team. I'm like, oh, all right.

The diamond team. Thank you. So we get in. We change the password. They change it back. The hacker is doing it in real time. We're still reeling. That happened a week ago.

And I think for about three days, we had a hack over. We were hung over from the hack. It was emotionally draining. I've never been hacked, but a very exciting milestone in my career the other day, someone made a fake account to try and scam people with my name. The fake OnlyFans? No, like it was on Facebook. Oh, one of those.

It looked exactly like my profile, but Mitchell Coombs had like an umlaut on one of the O's or something and then they went and commented on all my posts, replying to people who had already commented, saying, congrats, you've been selected, you've won, click this link to claim your prize. And I'm like, if I do giveaways to random people on Facebook. That's why we didn't talk for the whole three week, right?

Because I was talking to Mitchell Umlaut Coombs. That makes so much sense. I was messaging you. No, I think the umlaut on the O would make me Mitchell Coombs, like Osher Goonsburg. Yes. Wait, what's an umlaut? What does it look like? The two dots above the O. Oh, is that an umlaut? Yeah. Ah. the O would make me Mitchell Coombs, like Osher Gunsberg. Yes. Wait, what's an umlaut? What does it look like? The two dots above the O.

Oh, is that an umlaut? Yeah. Ah. Mitchell Coombs. Mitchell Coombs. Oh, he's got the umlaut on the U. That's why it's Osher Gunsberg, not Gunsberg. Oh my God.

So if I did an umlaut on the U in Mitchell Chury. I genuinely don't know what an umlaut does. I'd be Mitchell. No, Mitchell Chury still. Yeah, you'd be the same. Jenna, can you Google what does an umlaut do? What's an umlaut, Jenna? Okay.

Anyway, moral of my story, don't hack people. It's not worth it. Yeah, God, that whole episode came between Chiri and his beautiful popcorn. Yeah, and I was so excited to see everywhere all the time all at once in the same spot. Did you actually see it? No, God, no. Okay, U-M-L-A-U-T. It's German.

Oh, umlaut. It's a mark used over a vowel, especially in German, to indicate a different vowel quality. But what vowel quality? That explains nothing. A different vowel quality. It just means, hey, you think this is you, but fuck up. It's actually an O. It basically just means that the letter it's on top of,

ignore that letter. It's something else. Yeah. We learn something new every day, don't we? That's what the podcast is for. If you get a message from Mitchell Coons with an umlaut, ignore it. It's not me.

And if you're a penguin with a wig on, fuck off! Alright, you ready for yours Mitchell? Yep Let's go Is it just me or... Do you feel like you're due for an Instagram unfollowing cleanse? Oh yeah, I did one yesterday Really?

I did, I unfollowed the Marriott and a Vietnamese restaurant that I used to love. Yeah, it always seems like a good idea at the time to follow a business that you're currently at or like a hotel you're staying at. Oh, I'll follow them. But then I just get spanned from random shit. But it's also people I went to school with. Oh, yeah. I feel like I've done many unfollowing cleanses, but they just keep popping up. There's this girl I went to school with, and I swear she's an arsonist.

What? I think she's turned out she's an arsonist. What? I think she's turned out to be an arsonist. Wait, someone that sets fire to things? Like a pyromaniac, like Jenna. She's a firefighter. Yeah. That's what she does. She's a firefighter, but she just posts all these things and she's way too excited whenever

there's a fire. She's like, yay, fire call, like selfie in the truck. And she looks so thrilled. And I was going through it the other day and I'm like, oh my god, there's something wrong with you. Like you're doing a very noble job fighting fires, but you just get too excited about the fire part of it. Yeah, it's like a detective being like, yes, double homicide!

Yes, dead kid! Let me find it. I'll find her Instagram. It's so bad. So you think she's a secret undercover arsonist roleplaying as a firefighter? I honestly think, oh my god, look at this. Show me, show me. Oh my god, she posted a secret undercover arsonist role-playing as a firefighter. Oh, my God. Look at this. Show me, show me, show me. Oh, my God. She posted a video of the fire.

Oh, shit. That's it. And the caption says, not just a job, it's a passion. Love heart. Shouldn't she be putting it out? Oh, my God. Also, I love that there's no reference to whether or not the fire is the passion or putting it out is the passion. Yeah, that's the thing.

That's what's made me so sus. And also, she had time to film the fire. She's or putting it out is the passion? Yeah, that's the thing. That's what's made me so sus. And also she had time to film the fire. She's not putting it out. That fire was blazing near her house. She posted a photo of her firefighting uniform and says, getting ready, so excited, another fire call. Oh. No, she didn't.

Yeah, she just gets way too excited whenever there's a fire. And do you like these posts? No. Look at this. What's this? What is that? What? Okay.

So she posted this in August, which I believe that means it was winter. So fires were less of a problem than during summer. And she's used the song Burn by Ellie Goulding. Oh, no. Posted a video of a fire and she just says, miss this. She's like missing this. Oh, no. You can't do that. No, she's an arsonist that No, she's an arsonist

Yeah, she's an arsonist Yeah She starts fires Yeah I think she starts them so that she can go put them out I think so too Yeah I think that's evidence, Mitch

Yeah, like miss this A video of a fire You can't post that Oh my god It's so cooked Oh, that's gold What? Oh, look at this She's posted cooked. Oh, that's gold. Oh, look at this.

She's posted a video of the fire engine, the lights on top flashing, and she just captions it, my kind of disco lights. Oh, jeez. So, like, this is her idea of a party. Yeah. She's getting kicks out of this. Should I unfollow right here, right now? Yeah, do it.

I back it. No, actually, I want to keep seeing this shit. Yeah, I'm actually really invested. You unfollow her and send me her profile. I'll follow her. And I would like to follow her. Look at this. Just standing next to a log on fire. My calling.

Put it out. Don't just stand there and watch it burn. Is it just me? That's enough of these two. Now let's hear an is it just you? All right, time for an Is It Just You. If you don't know what this is, right, so we just did two Is It Just Me's of our own, Mitch,

and we give you the opportunity to be a little co-host on the show, and you can send in an Is It Just Me of your own. We call them Is It Just You, something you've noticed, something you hate or appreciate. You can hit us up on socials. Yeah, our Instagram is at coupleofmitches, and I'd like it if you come on the phone. That's my preference, so I can ask questions.

But is this a voice message? Old live call cooms. Well, that's also an option if you just want to send a voice message, but I'd prefer to chat. It's a bit more fun. Not everyone are consummate live radio pros like us. When have we ever had a dud caller? They've all been dope. They're all fun.

They all have been very good, actually. Yeah, true. A good call. All right, let's go. This is Caitlin. She's sent in her Is It Just You. Good, actually. Good call.

All right, let's go. This is Caitlin. She's sent in her Is It Just You. Is it just me or when you're in a rush to be somewhere on time, you get every single red light or if you're running late by even 30 seconds, every single red light to make you like 10 minutes later. It's not just you, Katie. I hate that.

It makes me so tense. You know, either of you do that thing where, like, you jiggle your leg when you're feeling a little bit nervous just to get rid of the energy. Whenever I'm in traffic and it's slow moving, my leg goes wild. It's like a dog pumping it. Not on the accelerator, I hope. No, no, no, nothing like that. But there's this one stretch of road right outside where I live

and if I drive somewhere and it takes 40 minutes, I swear 30 of those minutes are just getting out of my suburb because this one bit of road is so congested and shit and it's always the day that I'm running late that it's clogged. Always. It's always the time, the days when you've got nothing on and you've got to be somewhere, you get there 20 minutes early because you had the best run. There's no cars on the road. Yeah.

But when you're stressed, you've got to be somewhere. It's the orange lights that get me because it's like you want to go through them but you know you can't. You've just got to slow down. Have you ever gotten the red light camera? Yeahaps of times yeah i'm on one point i think i've announced that right i've got one many times yeah i'm still on one point but i do definitely i don't bitch it like if it's orange i'll fucking fang it and get through there but if it's like if i know that i'm not going to make it i'm pretty good at reading it i'm sober i'm a

good driver i'm very like i just know what i'm doing like I can go in and out of lanes I swerve like I don't waste any time I'm not dangerous I don't speed but like I'm just I'm always thinking about how I can get there quicker

so Hayden I think he can't drive he has learnt these bad habits so whenever he's in the car with anyone else he's like fuck this is slow

fuck you're a slow driver you can weave yeah what's going to happen when you do eventually lose your licence not if when it's not going to happen when you do eventually lose your license? Not if. No, it's not going to happen.

Because if your gay factor can't drive, you're fucked. Like, how are you going to get anywhere? It's ambiguous. They can't drive. But we went out clubbing the other week. We went to Pufdorf. Sorry? Yeah.

Wow. I never thought I'd hear those words come from your mouth. I don't know what's going on, but I got recognized twice, and one of them said, you're my second favorite, Mitch. Oh, good girl. I don't know who it was. No, no. You were at one of them said, you're my second favourite, Mitch. Oh, good girl. I don't know who it was. No, no. You were at Pooftoff.

Thanks. Yeah, I was at Pooftoff. Yeah. Wow. I never thought I'd catch you dead there. I'm in my social area, everyone. I love it. Okay.

But Slater was performing. He was one of Hayden's favourite artists. She's American and she was in town. So I bought him tickets. It was a cute thing. So we went and this girl goes, oh my God, you're my second favourite, Mitch. And I'm pretty sure Mitchell Coombs was here. I slapped his ass at the bar or it could have been a woman.

They didn't turn around. The music's very loud at those clubs. Well, I definitely wasn't. I haven't been there in like a couple of months. So yeah. Hell on earth. Sorry to that poor girl that got spanked without consent. She goes, can I take a selfie?

I go, yeah. And her phone was dead. I'm like, are you all right? People at clubs are not all there. Anyway, we got a poof doof. And hayden goes to show his photo card like a toddler anyway the card was expired so um he now has to get a new photo card or i go this is the perfect opportunity just get your l's because he's got to go to the rta he's got to go and answer all these questions i go just get your l's it's one of those things that i'm saying it'd really help me because i cannot i'm always designated driver. I drive everywhere. Help me. Think of me.

So that's the angle that I'm going for. Yeah, I'll back you up if push comes to shove. I'll say, your boyfriend is not living his life. Thank you. Yeah. He's a loser, Hayden. A loser. Oh, you can be. And it's your fault. Yes. Yes. You can be character witnesses. Like when someone is being charged with heinous

crimes and they get like an old uni lecturer to go, back in school, Jamie was a professional. So you can come to our meeting. Definitely. Fascinating, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Should we do Talk Back Tings now? Yeah, I think so.

Yes. Let's do it. Yeah, so Talk Back Tings is where we bring you some of the cooked shit that we hear on Talk Back Radio because it's live, it's dangerous. It is. You get some quirky old callers calling through to those places. And do you remember back in episode 15? They said, we're going back a while.

We played you the time that a bunch of people banded together to sabotage Graham Gilbert's nightly quiz. Oh, God. We'rely quiz. Oh, God. We're talking India. Yep, India. Every question he asked, every single question he asked, they would answer with India just to piss him off. Which Australian gymnast won Commonwealth Games gold in 1990

for his performance on the pommel horse? India. Marcus, grow up. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, grow up. Good on you. Oh, boy, is it. Yeah, whatever. Yeah, grow up. Good on you. Oh, boys, again, it'll be one of those nights. Robert, good evening.

Hello, Graeme, how are you? Not too bad. You'll have a sensible answer, won't you? Oh, just get my megaphone. Oh. And please, no more. Please. That was in our show opener for a while.

That was iconic to Ijem. Have you ever heard a more our show opener for a while. I know. That was iconic to Ijem. Have you ever heard of more defeated men? Now, please. I know. No more. You know the thing about talkback that I don't think we've ever addressed? Like, these guys, they have to time out to the hour, or half hour, for the news. So they sometimes have to feel minutes of audio, of dead air, just to make it out to the news break.

So the shit you have to come up with, it's a tough job. But also it's not that hard to get through to Graham's show. So that's why so many prank callers slip through the cracks. I know, I know. We tried it once. Remember, he didn't even vet us. He just put us on air. Straight to air.

Didn't even ask our name off air. Yeah. So he's quite used to prank calls at this point. Yeah. And he's got quite a short fuse when it comes to being on the receiving end. So he was asking his listeners about salt water in the ocean and what makes it so salty. And this old bird called through with a dirty joke.

I suspect it's not actually an old lady. You can tell by the voice. Oh, you think it's a Doc Wiggins scenario? It is very Doc Wiggins. You can just tell by the voice that it's not a real person. Okay, here it is. And the salt in the sea. Eleanor, is it?

Yes. Hi. I've got an answer for the saltiness of the ocean. Yes. My grandson told me he was looking it up on the internet. All right. Because of all the semen. Is that your answer?

Yes. Oh. All the semen in the ocean makes it salty. 13, 12, 69. we will totally ignore that answer. Okay? Because I just wish these people wouldn't phone up and put on bodgy voices. Alrighty. I think they're going to get away with it, but please, do we need to say it one more

time? We do take all of your numbers. And it is an offence, okay? It is an offence, the Communications Act. Shut up, Graham. Get off your horse. Get off your pummel horse. I just don't think that's true.

Janet, can you look up the Communications Act? It's not. It's an offence to prank call someone, because I really don't think it is. We do it all the time. I have to do radio codes once a year, and no, callers have no legal binding right. They can do whatever they want. It's just so easy and so fun to get through. And I just love his overreaction.

Yeah. Like, oh, please. We'll just totally ignore that. I have another example. Yeah, okay. More Graham. Right. No, it's not Graham.

This is a show in Melbourne on 3AW and they were on the receiving end of a filthy prank call. And their reaction, oh, my God, they overreacted so much. It's like, oh, laugh a little, darling. Oh, they were angry. Oh, they were furious. Okay, so this is a 3AW in Melbourne. Nightline with Bruce Mansfield and Philip Brady on 1278 3AW. We're down in Newport.

Toby's at Newport. Hello, Toby. Hi, Bruce. Hi, Toby. Hi, Bruce. Hi, Phil. Yes, Toby. How are you? Good. Oh, good, thanks.

I have a joke. Yes. What's the funniest smelling thing in the whole wide world? The funniest smelling thing in the whole wide world? Yes. Perhaps your nose. Oh, no. What was it?

An anchovy's cunt. Oh, what a pity, Toby. Never call us again, please. Never in your life even think about this. And think, all right, we've dumped you, Toby, but there are people like Carmen and Queenie online and could hear that in their ear and are offended. And we heard it and Simon heard it.

So you've ruined it for all of us. Toby, if you're ever thinking of tuning in again, just get a life. Toby, grow up. Grow up. Who the fuck are Carmen and Queenie? I found an answer. Oh, the communications act. So threatening to kill or cause serious harm to someone is considered a criminal offence.

Of course. Oh, my God, Jenna, did you think we didn't know that? No, even if the prankster... Oh, fuck, that's brand new information. Yeah, drowning a human will send you to prison. Oh, good to know. No. Beheading your mother-in-law or even threatening to do so.

Even if the prankster doesn't threaten their victim, repeated calls can amount to harassment, stalking or bullying. Okay, got it. So that person wasn't committing an offence. God, that call was hilarious. They were so upset. Do you love how as soon as he said an anchovies C word, you just heard the host in the background be like,

like turning all the buttons off. God, that's so funny. Good joke too. I've never heard that one before. That's fresh. Good gear. I was going to suggest that we get Dot Wiggins, your 80-year-old, 90-year-old, I can't remember how old she is, your alter ego,

the old lady that comes out to play every now and then because we haven't heard from Dot in a bit. I miss her. I was going to suggest that we call a station and try and get through, but if it's a repeated prank call, it's like, maybe that is. We'd have to call a different show, for example. Actually, no, Graham's not even on at this time of day, so it's probably fine. We could call an FM

station. Oh, that would be way harder if it's an FM music station. Yeah, true. But you have to call and basically use a dirty word and see if they even notice. Oh, like slip one in. Because you know how she said the shaman. Yeah. The shaman in the ocean. That was like slip one in. Because you know how she said, the shaman. Yeah.

The shaman in the ocean. That was like a double, what's the word? Double entendre. Yeah. Because like she was referring to men of the sea, men at sea, which is semen, but she tied it in with the saltiness. So it is actually dirty. So we need like a hidden meaning.

What if I talk about the fact that my pussy won't stop itching and I think she might have mites. That's too obvious. Mites. Not even lice. Mites. Mites, yeah. Smaller than lice.

I'm going to Google words that sound dirty. Beaver. Beaver. Beaver. Oh, beaver's good. I don't think we even have beavers in Australia, though, so that's too obvious. Are there no beavers? No, we don't. Maybe I can just say that I've got, suddenly think we even have beavers in Australia, though, so that's too obvious. Are there no beavers? No, we don't.

Maybe I can just say that I've got, suddenly I'm fascinated with beavers and it's very late in life because I haven't normally been interested in beavers, but I watch something on telly. What about the word rump? No, I want more vulgar. It needs to be, like, I could say hole, like a butthole. Like fanny, no. Fanny, flange.

What's flange mean? Oh, my God, flaps. Like fanny. No. Fanny. Flange. What's flange mean? Oh, my God. Flaps. Oh, flaps is good. Hi, I'm calling. I'm having issue with my flaps. But what could you actually be talking about? Obviously not your vag.

Mud flaps. I've got a four-wheel drive. Oh, yeah. My flaps are just, no matter how much I clean them, they're covered in grime and grunt and it stinks. Let's go with flaps. Oh, my God. I like flaps. I've heard otherwise about you.

What about like we're using flaps, but you're actually talking about flapperjacks like the pancakes. You're like, when I come home, my husband loves to gnaw on flaps, but I'm just having some trouble. The flaps are too dry. Oh, yeah. Flapperjacks. Is that too much of a long word?

I also don't think it's flapperjacks. I think you're mispronouncing that. I think it's flapjacks. Oh, whatever. You'll upset the Canadian. Yeah, flapjacks. Like you have this whole narrative that you like to cook your husband pancakes when he comes home from work every day, but you're having problems with the flaps.

With the flaps. Yeah. Yeah, okay. I like that. That works. There's nothing more he enjoys more after a long, hard day at work than my flaps. Some moist flaps. Yeah.

And what? I just start with him having some maritable problems. And then I, cause I don't want to lead with the flaps cause that'll, that'll be a red flap. Yeah. Maybe when you speak to the producer or whatever you say, you've got a cooking question. Yeah. Hold on, who's even on air?

Yeah, I'm looking now who's on air. Oh, okay, so same station as Graham and John Laws. Brent Bultitude. Oh, yeah. I don't think he'd be hard to get through to. What's the number? Let's try. 13-12-69, famously.

Oh, yeah, of course. All right, let's call. Shit, don't get me. be hard to get through to. What's the number? Let's try. 13-12-69, famously. Oh, yeah, of course. All right, let's call. Shit, Dot, get me! Me? Yes! Dot? Super Radio Network. Hello, who's calling?

Me? Who's me? Sorry? You're talking to me? I can't hear that. Is that me? No, no, no, certainly not. Dot, D- Oh, Dot. D-O-T. D for Dog., no, no, certainly not. Dot, D.

Oh, dot. D-O-T. D for dog. We'll join in to talk to Brent about it. O-T. I've been with my beloved husband for years, and they're having marital issues, and I just wanted to see, to stick it through, or is it too late in life to throw it all away?

It won't be long. Hold on. Make the payments. You've got serious problems. Hello? Absolutely serious problems ahead of you. Brian is next. Hi, Brian.

How are you going, mate? I'm not bad. That's what I called. How are you, Brian? And how's the left eye? The left eye is fine. It's the right eye that caused me all the problems. What's his name?

What's this guy's name? Brent. The host is Brent. Can you just confidently call him Kent? Yeah, I could call him Trent. Trent. Trent. Trent.

And I quite frankly order it. Hurry up. He does make him quite frank. Oh, come on, clown. Hurry up. What's the caller's name again? Brian or something? Brian.

Phil. Come on, Brian. Boring story. Politics. It's hard work out there on the campaign trail. You have Come on, Brian. Boring story. Politics. You have lovely hair, mate. You could be back here. You how are you, girl? He can't let anybody know that, can he?

He's got to carry on. Look at him next time. Oh, dear. Good to talk to you, Brian. Thank you for your... Dot. Oh. Hello. There, Dot. Hello. Oh, yes. Sorry, you, Brian. Thank you for your... Dot. Oh. Hello.

Hello. Oh, yes. Sorry, Trent. You have conjunctivitis, do you? No, no, no. I wish I did because I could get over that. What did you have in your eye? I had a detached retina in my right eye.

Oh, that's awful. You know, milk. Milk will fix this, Si. Milk will fix conjunctivitis. Milk will fix it. Skim milk, yes. Skim milk. And you put it in... No, Trent I don't tell you about it. Milk will fix the sty. Milk will fix congenital. Did you say milk will fix it? Skim milk, yes. Skim milk. And you put it in.

No, Trent, don't be silly. You put it in a shot glass. If only. If only skim milk would fix a detached breast. You put it in a shot glass. How can I help you, Dot? What would you like to say? Or the cap of the milk, and you put your eye, and you roll your eye back.

Anyway. Look, I'm not having a maritableital problem but i've been with my gorgeous husband brian for 40 40 45 years and uh i cook him dinner every night he seems to enjoy it and he seems to enjoy tea and they make him sweets i make him food i make him savory food and uh he mostly seems to enjoy my my flaps the only problem is he tends to be used to moist flaps. However, he now, sadly, has experienced that my flaps are dry. So he's not happy. Teary, mate.

Let's take a break. If it's news in your... We're gone. I think they hung up on you, Doug. He hung up on me! Let's take a break! Oh, my God. Oh, he didn't want a bar of it.

No, I think you weren't subtle enough. Yeah, I really didn't weave it in, did I? It was meant to be. I cook him a beautiful stack of flaps. It could be something else, but you just went right in. He doesn't like my dry flaps. I got distracted by the eye. You know what? I felt

bad because the poor bastard has a detached retina and then here I am being a bastard to him and then I called him Trent and his name's Brent. Listening on Spotify, don't forget to leave a five-star rating.

You're listening to Is It Just Me? Okay, a bit of housekeeping to do, actually, for our first show back since we've returned from break. Yeah, we've had a bit of time off, so we've got a few things to follow up on, don't we? Yeah, yeah. It's just really tying off some loose ends, so to speak. Correct, yes.

I've got a quick one, actually. We didn't even talk about this. The streetlights, you know, the gorgeous streetlights I spoke about in the last episode at Sydney Airport? Oh, yes. The mini streetlights. So cute. My best friend from high school, Jack William Fuller, was the architect behind the lights. Oh, small world.

Oh, no. I knew I liked them for a reason. Was he like your best friend in high school? Best friend. I was school captain. He was vice captain. Best friend. And you clearly didn't keep in touch afterwards because you didn't even know what he did for

a living. He's an architect. To be fair, a light post architect doesn't exactly excite anyone. But no, he designed the layout of the new Sydney airport and he messaged me. He's like, these are mine. I'm like, wow. That's what I did. Yeah, I did that.

They're my babies. I knew you'd love them. So anyway, that's a little tick that off. That's the lights ticked off. Yeah. Oh, I've got one more. One more piece of bullshit. What?

Get this. Yeah. I've been enraged when this came across my feed. Was it last episode or a couple episodes before we went on break? I brought to you the Australian Bananas advert. Oh, yes. You wanted to be the new poster boy for Australian Bananas. Yes.

Because they were, who were they reaching out to? They were doing sponsored content with Jessica Rowe, the TV presenter, and we were basically putting our hand up and saying, hey, if you want to sponsor our podcast, we will sing bananas praises. Exactly. And I don't even, to be honest, I don't even fucking like bananas. Oh, God. But I would have done it for a check.

Because they did knock us back politely. They said, there's nothing in the pipeline, but, you know, we'll think of you for any opportunity. They didn't leave us on scene. They replied and said, no thanks the pipeline, but, you know, we'll think of you for any opportunity. They didn't leave us on scene. They replied and said, no thanks, thanks, but no thanks. They've announced who the next banana ambassador is. The next collaboration, yes. Yeah, they've picked the face of Australian bananas.

So, you know, when you do one brand deal, it doesn't make you the face of that company. No, because this prick, this right prick, is wearing a banana shirt. Not Jessica Rowe. They have chosen Australian nobody, Rob Millsy Mills, to be the face of Australian bananas. Get a load of this. He put this on his Instagram a couple of days ago. Ready?

Good old Rob Millsy. I love bananas on my cereal. I love them on my toast. I love them on my pancakes. I love them in a loaf or a muffin or a slice. I started that. I'll wear them as a costume. Now he's singing.

That's nice. I love them in a slice. I started that. I'll wear them as a costume. Now he's singing. That's nice. I love them in a smoothie. I eat them on the go. But I always leave one banana for when I put on a show. So this National Banana Day, grab a karaoke banana. National Banana Day? Of course! Whatever you think.

Make your body sing. I did the jingle! I created the fucking banana jingle! And not only did they pick him over me. Sorry, really personally, you guys were involved. But they got him to sing. That's just their jingle on all the ads, isn't it? Yeah, but the first part where he's rhyming and everything.

Oh, yeah, there's another one he put up. I'm not going to play it, but he's playing the piano with a banana in hand, singing into it like a microphone. Oh, my God. He's wearing a banana shirt and everything good old milfy. Stupid. You could have done that. I could have done that.

And I did it. Yeah. I've done it. For free. And you know what? I'm boycotting bananas. And I want everyone to join in. Hashtag Idjim boycott bananas.

I mean. I mean. I already told you that after you were banging on about bananas, I've been reminded of my love for them. I have one for breakfast every morning. I had one today. Oh, well, sadly, that was your last banana. on about bananas. I've been reminded of my love for them. I have one for breakfast every morning. I had one today. Well, sadly, that was your last banana. No more bananas.

Do you know I know you've got a vibrator that's in the shape of a banana? You're going to have to throw it out. Everything banana going away. Just because you're that jealous of Rob Mills. I'm not jealous of Rob Mills. Good for him for getting checked. Let's be real. It's been a couple of years since he's had some work.

Hey, he was wonderful in Ghost the Musical. What are you laughing at? He was. I'm sure he was. I loved it. It was very moving. Oh, I'm sure. Just boycott bananas, everyone.

And you know what? I'm picking a new fruit. What? I'm doing it here now. A fig will never do me wrong. Australian figs. I want to be the face or the voice of Australian figs. Well, yeah, I feel like you need an underdog that would be quite grateful for some exposure like that. Figs. I want to be the face or the voice of Australian figs.

Well, yeah, I feel like you need an underdog that would be quite grateful for some exposure like that. A fig's a bit more, you know, obscure. Jenna, can you Google Australian figs? Do they have like a board? A lobby. I actually don't think I really know what a fig is. I love a fig. They're plump and they're round.

Look a bit like me, to be honest. What about a, what's that fruit that sounds like condom, but it's not? It's like a quondom or something. Oh about a, what's that fruit that sounds like condom, but it's not? It's like a kwandon or something. Oh, a kumquat. No. My nan used to have a kwandon tree or something outside of her house. Oh, a quokka tree. No, not quokka.

No, it literally, I'm sure it's like kwandon or something. I don't think that's real. Yeah, it is. Google it. Q-U-A-N-D-O-N-G. Jenna, can you please? There was a kwandon tree outside her house. I stand corrected.

I've got some sad news. What, what, what? There's no Australian fig company. Shit. Okay, well, what about the Kwondong company? Google Kwondong. All right, send me in your fruits, guys. I want people to tell me what fruit they think I should be the face of.

Just make a decision now. Go, go with your gut. I want to be the face of Australian pomelos. What's a pomelo? You made that up, didn't you? Jenna Googled pomelo. And you thought kwandong was made up. That's probably what we need to do.

We need to go for an obscure fruit. Like you said, that's not getting much love by the masses. Not the apples, not the nannies, not the avos. Fruits that no one knows. That Maggie Beer would rab it on about at her luncheon. Well, there's lots of things you can do with kwandongs. They're more of a dessert fruit. It's like you'd put it on top of a pavlova.

Oh, my God, I've got it. A custard apple. Sorry? A custard apple. Custard apple. Have you ever had a custard apple? I've never even heard of a custard apple. It's a fruit.

What are these? Yeah. Oh, my God. They're full of custard. Oh, that, really? Yes, they're full of custard. Are, that. Really? Yes. They're full of custard. Are you sure that's not man-made? No.

I want to be the face of Google Australian custard apples, Jenna. Oh, my God. Okay. Do they have a board? That's what we need to know. Custardapple.com.au. You're joking. Let's see.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. If they've got a website, they've got a PR agent. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I've got it. Look at this. Show me Jenna.

Oh, that's a gorgeous website. No, that website is so pov. I don't think they've got much marketing spend. This is perfect. That's why they haven't put out a search for the face of custard apples. And if I come to them, I'm helping them out. Why don't we do the email right now, Jenna? Yeah, Jenna.

You can dictate. Yeah, I've got contact us. Are you serious? Yeah. Okay, go. What do you want the subject line to be? Subject line to be the face of custard apple. The face of.

What about you make the subject line just I can help. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Short and sweet. You're right. That'll get their attention.

Yeah, you're right. I can help. Okay. Dear is bored. Dearest chair man or woman. As a lover. And.ez, you type quick. I can't even think. Guys, help me out.

I reckon you should really lean into the I can help thing. You'd be like, not enough people know about custard apples. Yeah, you're right. I can help. Start from the start. My friend's sitting right here by my side in our award winning, in the studio for our award winning podcast, didn't even know about them.

Yeah, yeah. I can help. This is good. This is good. Custard apples have a problem, and I can help. I sit here in the studio, great one, of my number one, comma, award-winning iHeartRadio podcast, and to my shock, my daft co-hosts were unaware of the treasure and delicacy that is a custard apple.

I can help. I can help. Yes. Yes. You want your name out there, question mark? I can help. You want more people eating your food? I can help.

Jesus. I think you do need to, at some stage, really make it obvious what you're asking. Like, you need an ambassador. I can help. I can ambassador. I can help. I can help. I can help. You want to drive results for your fruit sales.

I can help. Please contact me to discuss how I can help. Even better. Great. And then you can put my email address in. Yep. You know the email address? Yep.

And then go for gold, Jenna. Send it. Hang on. Just read it back, Jenna, to make sure we've got everything. Yep. Dearest Chairman, Chairwoman. Brilliant. Custard apples have a problem and I can help.

I sit here in the studio of my number one award-winning podcast, Is It Just Me? To my shock, my daft co-hosts were unaware of the treasure and delicacy that is a custard apple. I can help. You want your name out there? I can help. You need an ambassador?

I can help. You want to drive results for your fruit sales? I can help. Please contact me to discuss how I can help. And send. Send, Jenna. Send. Okay. That is housekeeping done for the face of a fruit.

Now another thing we wanted to follow up on is my run-in with Kerri-Ann. Let me just say it right off the bat. Sucked in, bitch. I beat you. I know you did. We were having a competition. Who can get a reply first? Paddy Newton, still leaving you on read. But I got to mingle with Kerri-Ann face to face.

So I won. Tell me how that even came about. So I, by the way, if anyone listens to this podcast, it's also a trash bag. You've already heard this story. I do apologize. Matt really wanted to know. I wanted to save it for this podcast. Yeah, it's fine.

No, it's fine. So I was going to this party and I went along and I got to the entrance and I was getting my name checked off on the guest list. As I'm scanning for my name to find it, I see Kerri-Ann Kennelly. Oh, my God. Among other people, Koshi, Kylie Gillies, Lee Sales, Mark Beretta. Got it. The whole fam.

So it was a network party. Yeah, it was the farewell party for the EP of Sunrise that was leaving. Yeah, Michael. And I saw Kerri-Ann was on the list and I thought, oh, fuck me. I'm about to have a run in with Kerri-Ann. And she wasn't ticked off yet, so I knew that she hadn't arrived to the event. But I went upstairs and I'm like, oh, God, I'm just bracing for it. She's going to appear at any moment.

And when she did, I thought, right, this is my chance. Wow. And I saw my moment because she walked right past me. Like we were brushing shoulders. Did you freak out? Did you freak? Were you scared? No, because I just knew I had to do this.

Yes. Because as you know, she's been a bit of a bit of a meme on our show for a long time. We've had a bit of a love hate relationship with her, haven't we? Oh God, yeah. Mostly hate. We really had nothing against her a love-hate relationship with her, haven't we? Oh, God, yeah. Mostly hate. We really had nothing against her until she was a little bit rude when we were interviewed on Studio 10. During our live cross, yeah.

More than a little bit. Well, no, like I said to you at the time, I'm like, I don't think she was being rude. She was just being Kerri-Anne. She also didn't know, yeah. She was being the devil's advocate. That's what she always does. Yeah, it's like flying back and telling a peasant that my TV's broken.

They don't understand that technology. So this is what happened in that Studio 10 interview, if you're new here. I have us mixed up with Larry and Kylie. No, I fully take that back. I believe it was Carrie Ann's Labrador the day I was watching, and that was enthralling television. So I take it all back. Golden Retriever.

Sorry, Carrie. I'm so sorry. Carrie? Carrie Ann to you, Mitch. Carrie Ann. Carrie Ann. You just speak. You speak. I'm so sorry. Kerry? Kerry Ann to you, Mitch. Kerry Ann. Kerry Ann. You just speak. You speak. I'm over it.

So you're trying to earn a living and you're doing a podcast. Yes. Good luck with that. I know. It's absurd. Yeah. Yeah. So Mitch took that personally and then we just decided that, yeah, from now on she's our nemesis. Yeah.

She didn't know that, but we just decided, yeah, she's our show nemesis. Yeah. And so I saw her there and I was like, I've got to do this. I've got to do this for our idiots. I've got to talk to her. So I said, Kerri-Ann, do you remember me? You interviewed me on Studio 10. And she goes, oh, I never forget a face.

However, remind me what that was for. Which, as All Right Hay pointed out, that's her way of saying, I have no fucking idea who you are. Yeah. But I said, oh, it was for my podcast, my co-host and I came on And she goes, oh that's right And I said, don't pretend you remember Kerry Ann, you don't remember You talked back to Kerry I did, I said, how many people have you interviewed in your career?

It'd be thousands by this point, you've been doing it for that long which was subtle shade in itself um and she says well you know i do have most of my resume stored up here but it has been many years i've got to get to the bar and i was like oh she palmed you off yeah and i thought fuck i fucked it i missed it i didn't get the photo i didn't get the photo so she went and got a bubbly and i'm saying to my friend who was there you gotta get a photo of me and kerryann yeah whatever it takes and he played it beautifully brooklyn he was like kerryann oh you've got to get a photo of me and Kerri-Ann, whatever it takes. And he played it beautifully, Brooklyn. He was like, Kerri-Ann, oh, my God, can we get a photo? Oh, thanks. Now, Mitchell, do you want one too?

I was like, smooth. Genius. So we got the photo and the whole time I'm thinking, this is hilarious. The photo was gorgeous too, very hard on the flash. You saw all of her imperfections. So we got the photo and I felt a little bit bad knowing that I did it in sort of a mocking way because she did stand there for like 15 to 20 minutes and kept chatting with us, which is nice.

You know, she was being present, giving us the time of day. Although I could tell just by looking into her eyes that she was thinking, who the fuck are these people? And fuck, they're weird. Like, we were being so weird. Also, it wasn't like a public event. These were all friends of Michael, the man that was leaving. So she shouldn't really be fangirled.

Also, I hate to say it, but I think it would be a rarity that Kerri-Anne has stopped and asked for a photo. No, I think it would happen all the time because people that aren't listeners of the podcast that asked me about it later, they were like, oh, my God, you met Kerri-Anne. Like people were excited for me. They didn't realise that I was doing it as sort of an inside joke. She's an Aussie icon.

Yeah, and that's what I've realised after taking that photo is that, oh, she's actually still beloved by a lot of people because they were like, that is amazing that you met her. I love her. She's an icon. You must have been so excited meeting a media icon. Yeah. It was something going for you.

But no, she was lovely in the end. And I posted the photo, didn't tag her on purpose because I also put on my stories, caption this, and I reposted a lot of the responses I got. And not all of them were flattering. Yeah. There was things like, don't go to Kerry's injector. Like a lot of things bagging out her. And I shared them and I didn't tag her because I didn't want her to see them.

And then it happened. I got a notification. Kerri-Ann Kennelly just started following you. Oh, dear. And I panicked because I thought, oh, my God, how did she find me? I didn't even tell her my name. Yeah. When I went up to her, I just said, Kerri-Ann, remember me?

I never said, I'm Mitchell. Yeah. So I'm like, how the fuck did she find me? Someone here must have narked. So in a panic, I just went and muted everyone on Instagram that was there. Koshi, muted. Lee Sayles, muted. Kylie Gilles, muted.

Sally Ivermeter, all of them. I just muted everyone because I'm like, someone blabbed. Someone told her. And so then I deleted the stories, hoping that she wouldn't see what I'd reposted, which was all the unflattering things people were saying. And then I remembered all the voice messages I'd sent her. Which are now going to be in her inbox. So what, did you unsend them?

They would have been moved from message requests into primary. They were bad too, weren't they? Because we now follow each other. Yeah, one of them in particular was bad, the most recent one. This is when I got a bit cranky that she wasn't replying. This was it. Carrie Anne, why don't we play a game of hide and go seek? You're in.

So just go and hide and don't come out until I find you. One, two, three. There we go. Yeah. Oh, shit. And I was like, oh, fuck. So, yes, I went and unsent them all. And it was a five-minute moment of panic where I thought, oh, my God, someone here narked.

Like, she's going to come for me. She's going to find me. She's going to find out all the jokes we've made about her. But I think my damage control sorted it out tootsweet because it wasn't a problem. She just commented, lovely to see you, which, as you know, is what you say when you can't remember if you've met someone or not. That's right. You don't say nice to meet you.

You say nice to see you. Lovely to see you. And she also reposted the photo to her Instagram story and put a love heart emoji. Oh my God. And I was like, I think I'm friends with Kerri-Ann now. Yeah. I think we're friends. Yeah.

I think officially. Yeah. And then over coffee we confirmed, yeah, we're friends now. She had me over to Pat the Labrador. Oh, did she? Golden Retriever. Yes. Yes.

Oh, lovely. What? Oh myver. Yes. Yes. Oh, lovely. What? Oh, my God. Look at you and Kerry. We're pals now. So no more Kerry Ann jokes on this show. Do you hear me? Yep, none.

I'm happy with that. Deal. Why don't we try and book her as a guest if you're so good friends? Such good friends. That could be full circle. Oh, my God. Maybe I take advantage of it. I message her and go, Kerry Ann, come on the show because now she'll actually get it and

listen to it because we're close personal friends. Do it. Do it. Bring the Labradors in. Sorry. Golden Retriever. And she can come in and sit in the studio and we can, I don't know what we'll fucking talk about.

Fossils or something. Anyway, let's try and get Kerri-Ann on. Why don't you send her a DM? I can't tell if you're joking or not. I'm being serious. I'd love to have Kerri-Ann. No, I want her on the show. It's full circle. I'm not doing it now. I can't tell if you're joking or not. I'm being serious. I'd love to have Kerry on. No, I want her on the show. It's full circle.

I'm not doing it now. I'll do it later. Okay, let's sit on it. But what if she does that thing that everyone does when you're invited on a podcast and you go listen to their most recent episode and you hear this? What if she hears this? Yeah, you're right. Well, we also replayed the moment that she broke her fibula over and over again for maybe

60 episodes. And then we commentated it. Every time she fell from the trapeze in our show opener, we'd go, Sam, you're right, bitch. See what I mean? I think it's too close to home. We can't invite her on. What if she is it?

That's true. That's like listening to a true crime podcast about the Zodiac Killer then inviting them on. Yeah, let's not do it. I think it's too dangerous. Yeah, Carrie Anne, she's banned for life. I think so. Even though. Yeah, Kerri-Ann, she's banned for life. I think so. Even though she's a friend of the show now,

we can refer to her as a friend of the show. No longer villain. Her slate is clean, but she is banned from the show. Yeah, you can't rewrite history. For her own good. Exactly. Oh, there we go. Kerri-Ann ticked off.

And one more thing I want to follow up on before we get out of here. Yes, yes. I'm pretty sure right before we wrapped up for Easter, you put the call out there. You said, hey, can anyone do a Mitchell Coombs impression? Did anyone even bother giving it a go? Oh, yeah. No.

I knew it. I'm unimpressionable. I knew it. Yeah, no one could do it. No one. Why did you do a tick for that? Because we've updated you. That would be a housekeeping.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. True. Actually, that was true, actually. That was wrong. Yep. Actually, it's frustrating because I do want to hear someone try and do an impression of me, but I love that no one is confident enough in their impression

because it's just impossible. It's hard. If you can, send us... We're not going to just not play it. If you do have a bang on Mitchell Coombs impression, get on the show. Message us. Good luck.

Very tough. It is hard. Give it a go. I think give it a go. Why don't you give it a go, Jenna? Why don't you give it a go, Jenna? Wow. She didn't even try.

That's insulting. That's horrendous. I didn't have practice time. True. Look, if you think you can. She made me sound really phlegmy. Yeah, she did. She blocked her nose.

She held her nostrils closed. She made me sound like a pipsqueak. I was trying to do a deeper voice. No, it didn't work deeper. All right, let's go. Good to be back, everyone. Back home. Back where we belong.

On the show, on Mitchell Coombs' favourite podcast. How's your guest booking going? You didn't answer that question. This is your favourite podcast. Oh, you made a statement and I just thought that everyone assumed that was true. There was a question. Oh, good. Thank you.

Guest booking. And do hit us up with suggestions on what we should call you apart from idiot. Yeah, I feel idiots very... It's negative. We want something positive. As a podcast whore, I can confirm that just idiots has not caught on in the same way as trash bags has. Does that mean we're going to have to rename our secret Facebook group?

Oh yeah, fuck. Well, maybe we're in too deep. No. Look, if we get a really good suggestion that clicks, why don't you guys send them through, then next week we can sieve through the options and we can try some out. Because, like, Trash Bags is a play on Trash Alley, but you can't just pick one word out of Is It Just Me and use that.

The Is It Just Meanies. The Meanies. The Meanies. No, but you've got to imagine someone coming up and saying, oh, my God, you're Mitchell. I'm an is-it-just-meanie. Too long. Like, I'm a trash bag.

I'm a meanie. Is good. I'm an idgmite. That's tough. What about you just take the is from is-it-just-meanie? I'm an insect. Oh, an insect. Or a me.

Buzz, buzz, bitch. I'm an insect. What about a mebian? From me. Oh, I don't know. It about a mebian? From me. Oh, I don't know. It's hard, isn't it? It's hard.

Look, name yourselves, guys. Idiots might be the best option. Maybe a play on a couple of Mitches. I'm a bitch. I'm a bitch. No, that's insulting again. We've gone from idiot to bitch. Why don't we call our listeners convicted sex offenders?

Hi, Mitch, I'm a convicted sex offender. I don't think that'll catch on. No. Oh, Mitch, oh, I love your show. I'm actually an international terror suspect. Oh, are you? Thanks for listening, international terror suspect. We'll catch you next week.

Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. How are you? Thanks for listening, international terrorist suspect. We'll catch you next week. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to ADD Brief. That was a positive. This is our secret segment on the end. Well, I was wondering, is it starting to get a bit convicted sex offender-y of me if I go, Welcome to ADD Brief?

It is a bit. It is. It's a bit, yeah. It's the secret segment on the end. We pretend that the show's over and then we just hang out with our favourites. But it's not. Our interim idiots. Yeah. Yeah. We call them idiots in the interim. We pretend that the show's over and then we just hang out with our favourites. But it's not. Our interim idiots. Yeah. We're calling you idiots in the interim. It also just rolled off the tongue for me earlier.

That's why I accidentally said trash bags. Yeah, I know. Something will come. Something will come out of this. Oh, I bet it will. Something dense. Something dense will come. God, I can't believe I bungled the flaps line. She just went straight out there with my husband misses my pussy. Like I essentially just said on live radio, my husband is used to having a wet pussy. I know, like it was meant to be innuendo.

You basically just said, fuck my moots dry. Yes. I got so caught up with a milk chat. Yeah, but I think you redeemed yourself with the milk chat. I agree. He seemed to love it. But the poor fuck with the detached retina. I don't even know what that means. Jenna, can you detach your retina so I have a visual?

Isn't the retina what makes you see? Yeah. It's detached. How does it detach? Well, like it falls off. Yeah, it must unstick. Oh, that's a disgusting mental image. Did everyone just wince at the same time? We all just went, ah!

God, that's awful. Yeah, so- Anywho. Have either of you watched Heartstopper yet, that Netflix show? No, not yet. No, it's meant to like- it's like a gay awakening story, right? Or a gay love story. I wouldn't say gay awakening.

Oh. It's just something that I feel like if you're gay it's mandatory to watch it's kind of like please like me everyone just watched it you know what i mean yes yes yes and it was fine it was a good like hangover show put it that way right like i wasn't hung over when i watched it though and i binged that thing in one day which i never do yeah is it like it's a sin remember with all the years that was yes but that it's that but less depressing because that was all about HIV AIDS. Oh, good. But this one, Heartstopper on Netflix, it's all about like, it's just cute.

Yeah. It's just like a little gay man and he falls in love with the straight rugby player and then the rugby player ends up, you know, having to. Don't ruin it. Don't ruin it. It's so obvious what it's about. No, I don't know. I don't know.

Is it like Love, Simon vibes? Yes. And then the rugby player has to, you you know grapple with his sexuality and come out to his mum and all that stuff and then it's gorgeous but then yeah i was just pretty furious how was the mum was she okay well the mum was played by olivia coleman or as i like to call her queen elizabeth yeah i can't unsee you from the ground yeah um a lot of my friends said that they cried real tears in several episodes. I didn't get that far. I was like, oh, yeah, this is sweet. It was heartwarming.

But I was also fucking seething. Why? I was like, screw you. For having that experience. Yes, you underage clowns. Yeah. This is not what coming out's meant to be. You're not meant to find someone that likes you back that easily.

Yeah. Yeah. Coming out is meant to be disgusting and traumatic. No, shut up. You're just as bad. You were the same. No, my coming out wasn't great. You and traumatic. No, shut up. You're just as bad. You were the same. No, my coming out wasn't great. You found a boyfriend before you came out.

Yes, but that's what made me come out. I've come out of the closet and been like, I'm out. I'm available. And everyone's been like, and? That show just made me feel so single. It also did feel a little bit inappropriate because the characters were only like 15 or 16. And I was like, that's below the age of consent. So obviously there's no sex scenes in it, but maybe in season two.

I don't know. Was it insinuating that they had sex? No, not at all. It was literally just cutesy, like holding hands and kissing and shit. That's all it was. And it was gorgeous. That's cute. I'll watch it.

I've just blocked anything with the word heart or stop in it because of my heart-related illness. I just don't want to be triggered. Oh, I didn't come up on my feet. Yeah, you're manifesting it if you watch Heartstopper. Yeah. You're like, you think that's a Heartstopper? You try what I had for dinner last night.

I just licked the bottom of the KFC bucket. That grease was gorgeous. Everyone's like, I loved Heartstopper. I'm like, when did you get my discharge notes? Yes, I'm watching Ozark. I've just finished the series finale of Ozark. And I know there's a lot of Ozark fans out there that got a cult following. That show is weird.

I don't know what other shows fall into this category, but there is so much like gravitas around Ozark and so much talk. And the show is pretty basic. It's actually not that. What's it actually about? Oh, money laundering, drug smuggling, drug cartels. I know. It's like a boring Breaking Bad.

No, it's a good show. Jenna, the ending. Have you seen it? I haven't seen the ending. I won't ruin it for you. I've only seen the first part of the last season. And you know what they've done, Mitchell? Last season, two parts.

Yeah, I hate that. So they've dropped. It's one season, but it's two parts, and they waited six months in between dropping them. Did they do half the amount of episodes in each part? Yeah, six episodes each. Oh, I hate that. Same.

Yeah, so I've only watched that first half. Okay, well, it's just lacklustre. Sorry, but it's not worth it. And it made me think, fuck, why did I put any time into this at all? The first half was quite good. Yeah. Well, I'm glad that you've said that because now I'm not going to go and watch it. I have no FOMO hearing you talk about Ozark, but you have to go watch Heartstopper.

I will watch Heartstopper. Hayden and I will watch it. I'm surprised Hayden hasn't already. No. He seems quite, you know, on the scene in the gay world. Yeah. He seems quite up to date with that shit. No, I got home the other night and he was watching the Olivia Rodrigo documentary for

the third time. Okay. She has a documentary? Yeah, on Disney+. Oh. Of course it's on Disney+. Yeah, I know. He's been watching it on loop. The new Kardashashians i've been loving i love the kardashians really yeah i love it

did you see that she's kim's with pete davidson now yes and they're at the met gala the met gala happened this week and pete was there with the most god-awful spray tan like clearly kim's gone pete babe like you need to get tanned and he he looks, Google Pete Davidson Met Gala, he looks six shades darker than he normally is. He's a white boy from Brooklyn. Yeah. Oh, he really doesn't look that bad. I think you overhyped that a bit.

I thought it was going to look shocking. But yeah, I like whoever's only spray tanned, I want to know where he got that. Oh, you like it? Mm-hmm. Okay. I've never had a spray tan. Did you guys get one? Yeah, they're quite good.

You feel a hundred bucks that whole time. Really? Mm-hmm. I might do it. Have you, Jenna. I've never had a spray tan. Did you guys get one? Yeah, they're quite good. You feel $100 that whole time. Really? Mm-hmm. I might do it. Have you, Jenna? I've never. Why don't you just, instead of getting a spray tan, you just get one of those, the mitt ones. Like, you get the foam.

I've used that. And you put that on. So, what do you do? You stand in the shower? No, you just, you have a little glove on, and you put the foam on, and then you just rub it in, and you just cover whatever areas you want to cover. Maybe you just want to tan your arms or your legs, and then you don't directly apply the foam to the face you just use whatever remnants is soaked into the foam on your face yeah and you leave it there for

a bit and then eventually i'd go through a lot of bubbles like i'd need a lot just a lot of service area to cover no it's pretty good it spreads? Yeah. I just want someone to attach a piece of string to my toe and dip me in it. And then just hang me out to dry. Oh, no, the spray tan is much more involved. You have to go in there wearing underwear. Oh, no, thanks. And it's like, all right, now, stand to the left, arm up, and it's very cold when they do it.

Yeah. And then you have to turn around and then do the back, and then you have to bend your legs out like, so they get the inner thigh. I could never do it. Yeah. And then you have to turn around and then do the back and then you have to bend your legs out like, so they get the inner thigh. I could never do that. That's why I'm saying you should just do the mitt thing. Oh, do you know what? I'll try it. Is it men than women?

I know that's ridiculous, but is, or do you just get any spray tan? The one I got, I'll just send it to you. It comes with the mitt and everything. Yeah. I love it. Yeah. Okay. I'll try it.

Hayden and I want to get baby Botox. What's that? Like a really small amount of preventative Botox that they put in your forehead and your face, which stops you from developing lines. So it doesn't freeze your head, but it just stops the lines from ever forming. So you get it so you don't have to end up with Botox

because lines form from movement, but if you get it before you have lines, you never get lines. Oh, God, I left my run a bit late for that. I've already got the lines. You don't have lines. I do. When you frown, yeah, but everyone has them already got the lines. You don't have lines. I do. When you frown.

Yeah, but everyone has them when they frown. You can't see them now because of my adult Botox. I should have gotten the preventative. Shit. Oh, do you have full adult Botox? Yeah. Not in the forehead, though. Just the eyes.

Yeah. I like being able to move my forehead. Yeah. And use my facial expressions. It's just the crow's feet that I don't like. Same. That's what I worry about. Because I'm very emotive that it'll just take away all of the.

Yeah, that's why I don't think you should get it in the forehead. Imagine not being able to do this shocked look of disgust face. Oh, that's my go-to. Yeah. How many times a day do I make this when we're doing the podcast? Sorry, you just yawned. You couldn't yawn. I will say.

You couldn't. Yes, you could. Don't say that. I love a good yawned you couldn't yawn i will say you couldn't you should could not say that i love a good yawn i went to the dentist the other day and she wanted to give me a feeling where she'd have to numb my face and this was the thursday before my show started yeah and i said to her oh can we reschedule for another day because i can't have a numb face because i'm doing sydney comedy festival tonight she goes oh you're performing and i was like yeah and she goes, oh, you're performing? And I was like, yeah. And she goes, oh, I knew you looked familiar. I swear, I swear I saw you at the Adelaide Fringe Festival.

And I just didn't correct it. I was like, yeah, I've done Adelaide Fringe before. Never been to Adelaide in your life. Did you love the show? Was I good? Great. She thought you were Kitty Flanagan. I'd be thrilled with that.

I thought I recognised you. You did the mystery box on MasterChef. You're Nigella Lawson. Oh, my God. I also have to get a crown on my tooth, which I never got. Oh, I just got a crown. What, you've got dental? You need a lot of dental work done.

Yeah, a couple of bits and pieces. Because, you know, the root canal, the worst thing ever. No, you're not getting it, are you? No, I already got it. I just never got the crown. When did you get that? I remember when you got it. Three years ago. Oh worst thing ever. No, you're not getting it, are you? No, I already got it. I just never got the crown. When did you get that? I don't remember when you got it. Three years ago.

Oh my God. Yeah, remember? So I've just been like risking it. So they've canaled the root, but they never capped it. Well, I just never booked in. Oh, Mitch. And then we had COVID, so I couldn't go to the dentist. So I used that excuse.

But I've just gone three years just risking it. My root canal tooth might just snap off. Oh my God. So yeah, I just never chew things on that side of my face. Vapes are shocking for your gums. It can give you severe gingivitis. That doesn't surprise me actually.

It's because you're holding it in your mouth and it's flavoursome. With smoking you don't really... What sort of bitch does that? You don't hold it in your mouth. You inhale it properly. I would never bum puff. I did a whole bit at my comedy show about bum puffing. I think we should call it a coward puff. Coward.

Yeah. Yes. They don't use the words bum puff in Melbourne, though. I learned that the hard way. What do they use? They all just stare at me blankly when I did the Melbourne show. What do they say? Bums suck.

Because that's so much better. That's what you and I do on a weekend. Oh, speak for yourself. You're not a bum puffer. Oh, I'm not a bum puffer. With a cigarette, like, you just inhale it straight away. But with vape, it tastes yummy. They're good flavours.

So you kind of do mouth feel it a bit more than a cigarette. Oh, I never did that. Oh, well, I'm just trying to prove the point of the dentist. I've been a little bit slack with the vaping. You know how I was cutting back heaps and I was only doing social vaping? Oh, gotcha. I got a bit stressed during the Sydney Comedy Festival season, so I took it up again.

So now I'm having to cut back again. So if I get cranky, that's why. That's what Hayden said. He was telling me I'm on this last vape, then I'm done. And then it was a yellow one, then the next day it was purple. I'm like, what's happening here? He was just buying new vapes. And kept telling me that it was the last one.

And he would, like, shake it, like, it's almost done. I'm like. That doesn't prove anything. Yeah, I know. It's not a tank of petrol. So Hayden's a vaper too? Yeah, severe. Really? Severe. Oh, wow.

I suddenly feel less alone because I would have used the word severe to describe around, you know how I was really bad. I was vaping the whole podcast basically last year before Christmas. You're addicted. I would have definitely, I'm still addicted, but I'm not as severe now. Like, I don't do it all day, every day.

Look at you. You just, all these addictions, all these hooks, and I'm just being consistent old Mitch, the whole C series. I've never strayed or shown any signs of addiction or mental illness. Oh, really? This whole series. I love how that's meant to be a flex. It's not.

Listen, I've got genetics working against me here. The Coombs are the gambling addicts. Are they really? They're all depressed. Oh, dear. No, trust me, I'm just severely undiagnosed. Do you ever get tempted to have a puff of the vape that Hayden has? Yeah, I like the sweet flavours.

Ooh, fuck. Here we go. That's where it starts. Don't do it. No, my favourite is grape. I love grape. Here we go. That's where it starts. Don't do it. No, my favourite is grape. I love grape. Okay, that actually does make me feel better. That tells me that you're not a certified vapist

because that's like entry-level vaping, the grape one. That's like the L plates of vaping. Okay. Well, we had a party. But don't, seriously, don't do it. It's really hard to get off. And then I was at a party and a friend's like, do you want some of my vape?

I'm like, sure, expecting it to be a grape. No, no, what she pulled out looked like a hand grenade I'm like, sure. Expecting it to be a grape. No, no. What she pulled out looked like a hand grenade from the future. Oh my God, they're getting bigger. Holy shit. I wonder if I've got one. I'm sure I would. A vape?

I used to always just have them with me, so surely. I've been pretty good. I haven't had it today. Good. He's pulling out a heroin. It's a syringe. Oh no, I've got. Oh no.

Ah, bingo. Look. Show me. Strawberry banana. Strawberry. Oh, a syringe. Oh no, I've got... Oh no. Ah, bingo. Look. Show me. Strawberry banana. Strawberry? Oh, a hybrid. Yeah. Is it allowed to have banana in there after your ban? I just don't hear it. It's just strawberry. I don't hear the word. My brain has not blocked it out. God.

The craving is shocking as I'm staring at it. Don't. Give it here. Put it in my water bottle. Let's kill it. Now what if I need that on a night out? I told you. Keep it as a backup. I've called day-to-day vaping. It's the social vaping that I am allowed.

That's the worst stuff, the social vape. If you are trying to kick it, that's where it'll get you. Because all my friends vape, so if I'm around them, fucking hell. Jenna, you were on the vape too. Yes, socially now. Which is never. Fuck off. Even Jenna's getting hooked now. Yes, because I. Which is never. Fuck off. Even Jenna's getting hooked now.

Yes, because I know that I will become addicted if it was But you don't socialise. Yeah, I know. But for a week I was addicted. It was That shocks me. It was not good. It was not good. No, it's not good but it's also making me feel more human because you guys

made me feel like a scumbag. But it's easy to get hooked. If even someone is intelligent and bright as Jen, I can get hooked. Don't go there, kids. But this is a PSA. Don't vape, kids. Don't get into it. It's not worth it. You kind of just piggybacked off what I was saying there. I said, don't do it. Don't get it. And you said,

no, no, no, but here's a PSA. For the international listeners, you can't do it. Don't do it. I'm the authority here. I'm the adult. I'm the adult in the room. Please. So they listen to me. Don't do it.

Yeah. The kids listen to you. The adult listens to you. The adults. Okay. Yeah, just don't do it. Yeah, just don't do it. Don't.

Do you think vaping now is like smoking in the 80s? You could smoke on an airplane. You could smoke on an airplane. Have you tried vaping on an airplane? Are you allowed? Are you allowed? No. No, no, no.

But I feel like you were like months ago. No, when I flew back from Melbourne, I posted a video about this. When I flew back from Melbourne, the voiceover lady during the safety demonstration on the flight, oh, she's fed up with people vaping. She's fed up. Yeah. She goes, this is a non-smoking flight that includes e-cigarettes. So please don't even try.

Like she got real sassy. Like she's been fucking burnt before. Don. So please, don't even try. Like she got real sassy. Like she's been fucking burnt before. Don't even try. Yeah, but it was like really sassy. So please, don't even try. Yeah, because people would just, because there's no smoke, it's just the vapour, people would slyly try to do it. And then the flight attendants would be walking down that aisle

handing out the Byron Bay cookies and then they'd smell tooty fruity and go, someone's fucking doing it. Yeah. Just open the emergency exit and suck everyone out there, I say. I remember one time doing it in a public bathroom. Yeah.

And I walked out of the stall and the bathroom stalls had overhead lighting and I was like, oh, my God, that is so fucking obvious. You could see the vapour just lingering above my cubicle and in my cubicle only. And I was like trying to fan it away because it was just lingering there under the lights illuminated it. Someone's like, that's a fucking hot shit. What a steaming load of bullshit that was. Okay, we should go.

We really need to go. What do you think of Gaga's new song? That's the only other thing I was going to bring up. What's it called? Fuck, I don't even know. It's the Top Gun movie. I've only listened to it other thing I was going to bring up. What's it called? Fuck, I don't even know. It's the Top Gun movie. I've only listened to it once and I was like, meh. It's not for me, to be honest.

I saw something on Twitter before it came out saying, oh, this song is going to be Gaga's My Heart Will Go On because that was a movie soundtrack song, obviously, and it was huge. Is it Hold My Hand? Yeah, everyone thought this was going to be her My Heart Will Go On moment. It's not.

Should we listen to a little bit of it? I have it. We'll just start. Just a little bit. Okay, this is Hold My Hand. Everyone thought this was going to be her My Heart Will Go On moment. It's not. Should we listen to a little bit of it? I haven't. We'll just start. Here we go. Just a little bit. Okay, this is Hold My Hand, New Gaga. And we're critiquing it, so copyright-wise, we're allowed to play it. Yes.

Oh, there she is. It's in 314. I heard from the heavens that clouds have been great for me close Wrap me in your aching arms I see that you're hurting, why'd you take so long To tell me you need me, I see that you're bleeding You don't need to show me again But if you decide to, I'll ride in this Bit yelly. I'm not hooked yet. No. Oh, maybe now.

I'm doing it more than the first listen. She's rabbiting on about this hand. Oh, that's classic Gaga. No, it's a bit... No, sorry. It feels like a Star Is Born reject. Yes, it does. It feels like they thought, no, this song's not good enough for our film. Let's, you know, shop it out to other films.

It feels like a cash grab. Like, she'd be paid so much to do a Top Gun movie song for the soundtrack. I really thought that that second listen was going to make me go, actually, it's not that bad, but no, it's just nothing special. I saw on Twitter that the best part was the guitar solo, which I want to hear. I don't think I even made it to that. Oh, yeah. Yeah.

I can fuck with that. That's good. Building to that's nice, but it took us too long to get there. Yeah, too long. Yeah, wow. I will not be holding your hand, Gaga. You know what song has been stuck in my head for no reason? What?

All week. Sorry, I know we're supposed to be leaving. Yeah. But we'll end on this. It's called, oh, you might know, Jenna. It's called The Story by, I want to say Belinda Carlisle, but it's not Belinda. Brandy.

Brandy Carlisle. They used it on a McLeod's Daughters commercial back in 2007. They did too. Yeah. Oh, my God. Why is it stuck in your head? Turn it up. I don't know why.

It just came to me one day. Do I know it? Is it a classic? Yeah. All of these lines across my face Tell you the story of who I am Not hitting me yet. So many stories of where I've been

It was on Grey's Anatomy and some Zac Efron movie. What was it? The Last Post or something? Oh, The Intern. No. Let me look it up. The Last Post. The Intern.

Bad Grandad. Now this is where the guitar solo does fuck. The Lucky One is the movie. Oh, The Lucky One. the movie. Oh, it's The Lucky One. Lucky One, yeah. I climbed across the mountain top. Yeah, I can fuck with it. Swam all across the ocean blue.

Across all the land and out of all the rules. And baby, I broke them all for you. That's as good as it gets. That's as good as it gets. You should play this for Hayden one night. This is good. Here comes the guitar solo. Five, six, seven, eight. Oh, that's a good song.

I do like Brandy. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today, idiots. That's all. So we do. God, we're good. It's good to be back in the swing of things. We'll leave you with this. Actually, you do it.

You're a radio guy. Brandy. Wow, the skills unmatchable. Brandy. Carlisle. The story. Ijem. See you next week, everyone.

Fast forward to the end bit. That's what I need to end on. I think there's a bit more bullshit. There is. Yeah, have we been forward to the end bit. That's what I need to end on. I think there's a bit more bullshit. There is. Yeah. It'll be like in the last maybe 30 seconds. Bye. Thanks for listening.

See you next week. We love you. All it's true. That I was made for you. Bye. Shut up, Jenna. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of meaches.

Make sure you hit follow on your podcast app. I've been And now I get to where I am Oh But these stories don't mean anything But you've got no one to tell them it's true

I was made for you