Is It Just Me? - #12: Dua Lipa "Co-Hosts" the Show

Episode Date: December 8, 2019

When Mitch runs late (00:43)R.I.P Printers and USB's (02:18)Someone tell Kanye West board games suck (07:05)How Mitch offended Dua Lipa (16:18)Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. This is it. This is the big one. This is for the girls. This one. Some things make more sense than others. Lindsay Lohan punched in the face after trying to take a boy away from a mother. You're a good little boy. I won't leave until I take you.

Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for. That's the line, I see it quite clearly. Get new glasses. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. And one Mitch is clearly better than the other one. I can agree more. Now here's Mitch Chury and Mitchell Coombs.

Hi guys, hi Jenna. Hello. Mitch is running late at the moment. As always. So we just thought we'd kick off without him. Like 10 minutes, I can handle, Jenna. Yes. Maybe 15, half an hour.

But he's over an hour late now. So I'm just thought, bugger it, mate. You're not that special. We can carry on without you. What have you been up to this week, Jenna? Oh, you know, nothing much. Just sitting down. Okay, maybe we do need Mitch.

That banter is not as electric as I thought it would be. No, we do not need him. Mitch caught up with Dua Lipa recently. Maybe that's where he is. He's off telling everyone, oh, did you know he interviewed Dua Lipa? He's very proud of himself. So we wanted to share that later on. A bit too proud, I think.

Apparently there's something that he said to Dua Lipa that she was not impressed with at all. And so he's a bit worried that she hates him. Well, I hate him. Yeah, join the club, Dua. We've got jackets. Plus, Jenna, you're going to be doing Jenna's junk. That's going to be back. That's all the rejected talking points that we decided not to put on the podcast because they were rubbish.

But here you are regurgitating them. It's a great segment. A fan favourite. It actually is. We did a poll in our Facebook group and it was one of the most popular segments, oddly enough, because it's literally, it revolves around all the shit parts that we decided not to cover. Still a fan favourite.

But we kick off each show with an Is It Just Me? Each, something that we've noticed, hate or appreciate. It's usually Mitch and I doing it. We don't tell each other what it's going to be. Are you going to be able to wing one for us, Jenna? You know, I think I will. You will? Yeah. Let's do it. You've been on the show this whole time. You've been more loyal than he ever has and you don't even have a role. I know. So I think you've earned this idjim, Jenna. Thank you. Go for it.

Is it just me? Is it completely pointless to own a printer now? Oh, good one. I know. Like, why would you own a printer? That's so stupid. That's coming from us, though, because we work in an office. Because if you need something printed, right, you can just be like,

oh, I'll print it when I'm at work. Yes, but also I don't need it printed. Really? You don't print shit anymore? Actually, I don't think I do either, to be honest. No, everything's online. Yeah, you're right. Actually, this happened to me quite recently where I required a printer at home, and it

was one of the biggest ordeals I've been through, Jenna. Please tell me more. I lost my wallet, right, which meant that my license, I didn't have that anymore. And you have to print off an interim license. It's like a piece of paper that basically you hand to the police if they pull you over and it says, dear copper, his new license is in the mail on its way. Don't get mad. And so I was meant to print that at work.

I forgot. I was on the way home and I'm like, I'm not turning around. I'm not going all the way back to the office. And so on the way home, maybe I was paranoid, but I swear to God, I saw like 12 police cars and I was like, oh my God, oh my God, I'm, I saw like 12 police cars. And I was like, oh my God, oh my God, I'm going to get pulled over for sure. And I don't have a license. I don't have the interim license. I'm going to get fined. And so I'm freaking out. And so I actually called the local police station and I said, hey, hon, can you just let your boys know that I don't have a license? I know I don't have a license, but I'm on my way to print it now. And very nicely, the

copper said, would you like to come to the station to print it? I was like, yes, that would be very helpful. That would save me a lot of trouble. I wouldn't have to go back to the office then. And so I got to the police station and I said, hi, mate, can I just forward you the email? And they were like, oh, sorry, we actually can't do that because unless you are actually a suspect or a victim that we're dealing with, we can't give out that because unless you're actually a suspect or a victim that we're dealing with, we can't give out our email.

Just pull out a knife. I was like, you've got a badge on. I could guess the formatting. Like let's say he's Dave Smith, dsmith at New South Wales dot police or some shit. I don't know. I could probably guess it. Or do you want me to go commit a crime so that I'm allowed to get your email?

But he says to me, sorry, I thought you were bringing in on a USB. And I was like, who uses USBs as well as printers. Okay. That's another one. That's another one. Who uses USBs now? Who went out of uni, out of school. And also most computers don't have a USB port anymore. Exactly. And so this police officer says there's a library next door. Go print your interim license there. Oh God. I was like was like fine i went to the library and i said hi no i'm not a member no i'm not interested in joining i just need you to do me a solid hun and just print this friggin interim license for me i forwarded the email and she goes how am i supposed to know that this is actually your interim license you could be this could be

identity theft unless you have some id to prove it's you. And I was like, I don't think you understand. I don't have ID. That's the problem. That's why I'm here. It was the biggest ordeal. I nearly went to Kmart and bought a printer. But then what would I do with the bastard? Exactly.

Why would they even require you to print it? Are they stupid? Because it's just too difficult. Well, bearing in mind, this was like probably a week or two before they launched the digital licenses. Have you got yours yet? No, I haven't yet. Oh, that's right. You don't have a license. I do. I'm on my learners, okay? What do you do if someone IDs you? Do you give them your learners? Yes.

Well, look, I've got the app. Ready? Oh, face ID. Driver's license. I can now just bring it up on here. You look so little. I know. That was like 2016. See, now Service NSW are getting with the times. They've got an app.

I like how the background moves so you can't screenshot it. Exactly. Very clever. Oh, here he is. He's decided to show up. Sorry, hold on. No, we're on. What do you mean?

We started the show without you. No, you didn't. Yes, we did. It's not possible. No, it is. We What do you mean? We started the show without you. No, you didn't. Yes, we did. It's not possible. No, it is. We did. This is a prank. Why are you so short of breath?

Well, you wouldn't remake The Mask without Jim Carrey, would you? That's what this is like. Well, Jenna just hijacked your engine. We were talking about printers. What, are we sponsored by Officeworks all of a sudden? No. It'd be great, wouldn't it? It would actually.

It would actually be really good. Hold on. Are we all good on the desk side? Yeah, I know what I'm doing over there. Shit, you really don't need me, do you? Nah. Hold on a second. Teach you to be late again. I told you that I was X

amount of minutes late. You told me you were 10 away an hour and 10 minutes ago. Well, the bushfires, alright? It's very smoky out there. I feel like an Atlantic salmon. Being smoked. Hold on, I'm so puffed. I need a water. All I did like an Atlantic salmon. Being smoked. Hold on, I'm so puffed. I need a water. All I did was run up a fire to stay. Oh, you poor thing.

Well, Jenna and I were coping just fine without you, to be honest. Where are we up to? Have you done your origin? No, she kicked off with hers. And you put the sound effect and everything? Yep. Well, can I give you my two cents or is it not needed? No, I think we've exhausted this. Yeah. Okay, so should I just do my job and press the button?

Is it just me or? A board game's no good. Oh, I'm partial to a board game. I love them. You do strike me as a board gamer, actually. The first fight me and Hayden ever got into was on a board game. Not on a board game. We went on a giant version of Monopoly.

We were playing Monopoly with the family and it was our first genuine fight. How long into the relationship was this that you decided to say, hey, babe, come play Monopoly with the family? It would have been like maybe four months in, maybe more, maybe six. It was just shy of six, actually. So it'd be around, yeah, five. I hope to never be at that point in a relationship. To play Monopoly with the family.

That sounds like the worst time ever. It's bonding with the family. So it's good for them to get to know the family, but it's horrific for your personal love. Exactly. What was the fight about? Well, he was being a right little bitch. He, you know what he did? So I was doing quite well because I'm quite good at games,

especially when I've got my little sister and I can manipulate her. I'm like, give me some of that money and I'll give you the train station. She doesn't know what it means I had like one of the yellow two of the pink and one of the red or two of the red so all I need was needed was the one of each

and I would have been able to buy start putting hotels up I had three two of the three properties on the you know corresponding colours but he had the ones for every other property

so all I needed to do I don't know what this means no I don't either oh so in Monopoly you've got like I didn I needed to do. I don't know what this means. No, I don't either. Oh, so in Monopoly, you've got like. I didn't ask to be explained. I just wanted to get to the good bit. Well, the people that are listening and play Monopoly get it. So I had two of the three red, for example,

and he had the other one red that I needed. So I'm like, hi, I'd like to offer you this much money for the red. Well over asking price. And he'd go, no, I don't want you to ever be able to put a hotel up so i'm never selling you these oh so he was sabotaging you correct on purpose and i'm like what the fuck and then everyone in the family and you were in front of his family or he was in front of your my family and they were laughing and they were enjoying his bit so he could go because he was getting brownie points with my family but losing them very quickly with his lover and we

had a massive fight after and i think i ended up what happened in the fight oh we had a massive fight after. And I think I ended up apologising. What happened in the fight? Well, we had a... I'm like, no, I said the bitchiest thing. I'm like, well, mum and dad are seeing your true colours, finally. And then he's like, what do you mean? And I was like, you know. And then mum and dad's like, why don't we take a break? I'm like, why don't you just roll the fucking dice, Michelle? Oh, wow.

Yeah, it was intense. And then we went to bed after and we didn't talk for a while. See, this is what I'm saying. It always goes that way. Either it's really unfulfilling and no one is enjoying it or everyone gets so into it that it just means that everyone's fighting. Everyone starts fighting over the rules. Everyone has different understandings.

Don't even get me started on the whole draw four thing and you know. Everyone always argues about that. What is the rule with that? If you put four down, you cannot put another four on it. I say you freaking can't. Really? Go for your damn life. Yeah, it's actually amazing.

I can make someone draw 16 if I fucking like. Have you done that? Absolutely, I have. Really? And then, like, I don't know, my sister will bring one of her friends home, some rat will be like, no, no, you can't do that. And I'm like, get out of my house. And this is the thing.

It's coming up to the holiday season. Yeah. And for some reason, this seems to be my family's go-to whenever we're bored over Christmas, New Year period. And I just can't be bothered. Like, I'm exhausted at the thought of, let's play Pictionary. I just sit there at the table and I feel restless. And I feel like, is this not comfy?

And I'm just like, oh, having to be still and like, oh, I just hate it. Yeah, it's very anxiety-inducing. That sounds amazing. It's shit. My family won't ever play board games with me. Really? No. They're too wealthy.

Their idea of board games is just, you know, stocks. Yeah. No. Betting on the ponies. Let's invest in Dow Jones. Says who? Oh, good move, Auntie Jane. We should invest in oil.

Jenna's like, who wants to play Scatterglories? Shut up, Jenna. Why are they British? I don't know. I think they'd be very wealthy and British. But, you know, the funny thing is that I got a bit of comfort out of the fact that it's not just ordinary families like my own that get stuck doing this shit.

Even the Kardashians in a recent episode were bored out of their brains because they were too polite to tell Kanye West that they were not enjoying his fucking game. He apparently invented some game of his own where you like circle

all the positive words in the dictionary. I've got a little grab for you. Take a listen. Warning, you'll feel dumber after listening to this. Go. Kanye always wants people

to be more positive. So he came up with this little dictionary game. We, like, pick a page in the dictionary, and everyone has to underline the positive words. Okay, did anyone highlight barrel? No. No.

Barter. I did. I did. No. So why didn't you? I thought it was a nice practice. But it can be, but it could also introduce so many negative things at the same time.

I put basic. I didn't put basic. Yeah, why'd you put basic? It's like a basic. You're not wrong or right. I just want to know why. This always sparks these kind of conversations. People get into like parenting and this and that.

It's a fire board game. Like when you're bored. That's a board game. That's true. C's what board games are. That's true. Cringe, cringe, cringe. He needs mental help. I love how they just laugh him off.

This is a fire board game. True, Kanye. We love you. Like they just hate the poor man. I just hate it. I'm so not looking forward to having to politely say no, I'd rather not.

Not because I'm not interested in bonding but I just it's just such a shit way of bonding. What's your family's go-to other than Uno? Moon Monopoly, Scrabble. We also have this one. Have you ever heard of, fuck, hold on, what's it called? Let me remember. Boulderdash.

Oh, yeah. What's Boulderdash again? Can't remember. I think it's just about bullshitting. Yeah. Oh, you've got to be all be good at that game. Yeah. It's basically, it is a skill test of like, who's the most convincing liar.

You would be great. Yeah, I would be. I just Boulder Dash this entire podcast every week. I got Cards Against Humanity one Christmas. Remember when that was all the craze? Can I just say, people who are still enthusiastic about Cards Against Humanity, fuck you. Like, it's so old and they're not funny anymore. No, they'reity. Fuck you. I know. It's so old.

And they're not funny anymore. No, they're not. And they've dated poorly. I think we're sort of past all that here. Very. Anyway, yeah, we bought that. And every Christmas, they're like, let's relive the golden days and play Cards Against Humanity. I'm like, no.

No. You've had such a big meal and you've had your pavlova. I love board games, but Christmas time? No. I just want to sit back. I want to relax. I had a fucked year. I just want to chill out yeah exactly and you know how some people do try and relive the old days yeah like my sister will be like oh mitch can you help me connect the playstation 2 i want to play things dark or just dance on the nintendo

wii and i'm like we don't need to relive the glory days because I can drink now. I couldn't do that then. I have a prescription for medicine that will make me sleepy. I'll be taking it. You're listening to Is It Just Me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. You know another thing that I hate about the holiday season? Fortunately, my family don't push this agenda. It's everyone outside my family that seems to. Themed costumes.

Yes. At Christmas? Yeah, our Christmas party for work, the theme is a touch of sparkle. I thought that just meant like a touch of sparkle. But no, everyone's going all out. I was just going to wear my converses with sequins on them. Wait, is everybody? I thought you were going to wear that.

I actually thought about that. Everybody's going all out? Yeah. Oh, I was just going to wear a sparkle. There you go. That's all. That's a touch of sparkle. I've got nothing, I was just going to wear a sparkle. There you go. That's all. That's a touch of sparkle. I've got nothing.

I've got a sparkly bow tie. Oh, okay. You and I will be the underdressed ones. That's so fine then. I'm not doing anything. I literally have nothing planned. But also the New Year's Eve party that I'm going to has an equally cringe theme. Is that the kiss one?

Yes. I've got no idea what I'm supposed to dress as. It's not a theme. Carnival. What is that? Carnival. What does it mean? I'm not going's not a theme. Carnival. What is that? Carnival? What does that mean? I'm not going out and buying some carnival rubbish.

What is carnival? I don't know. I haven't even looked into it, but I'm already dreading it. Carnival. But you always get into Halloween. Like, you're a bit of a costume. You always get into it. I love when it's justified.

I've been as Kim Jong-un, which I've realised was a bad idea, and I've sort of blocked that out. That's probably not appropriate anymore, so the photos have been deleted. And I have gone as, or Strawberry. There was a massive epidemic in Australia where some

bastard was putting needles in strawberries. Oh, that's right. And you went as a strawberry with a needle thing. Yeah, it made Daily Mail. That was a good one. That was a good one. That was a very good one. But I just couldn't believe the amount of effort you went to. When someone adds a theme to a party, I'm like, fuck you. You've just created an errand for you. Yeah, it made Daily Mail. That was a good one. That was a good one. That was a very good one. But I just couldn't believe the amount of effort you went to. When someone adds a theme to a party, I'm like, fuck you. You've just created an errand for me. People that go above and beyond for costumes, I've never

understood them. Like Halloween, Christmas parties, New Year's, none of it. I'm not looking forward to it. Yeah, you chuck on a couple of kitty ears and some mascara and you're set. Not even that. I'm a naughty kitty. Not even that. If I don't already own it, it's not happening as part of my costume. I'm a naughty little pussy. When have I ever done that? I'm here. I'm Mitchell Kims. I'm a naughty little

pussy. Why didn't you go as a sparkly pussy? Yeah, go as a sparkly bussy. I've just spent the last, like, what feels like five minutes explaining that I don't like costumes and shit. Why are you now giving me ideas? I don't want that. Because it's sparkle flames. I will help you make it and I'll help you in best

dressed. I'm like... Is there a best dressed at our Christmas party? Oh, there will be and your buddy better believe I'll win it. Oh, well then I wouldn't want to waste your time and attention. Like you just do that. You just work on your costume. I'm multitasking. I'm like Fran Tan from A Queer Eye. I can help and I can do myself. Anyway, Mitch, look,

you spoke to Dua Lipa recently. I'm trying to move this along. I did. This was actually crazy. I was flown to Hamilton Island by Warner Music Australia, and they reached out. They're like, Dua Lipa's in town for Don't Start Now. She's got the new album coming out, Future Nostalgia. She'll be in Hamilton Island, and she just wants to do press in Hamilton.

A simple yes would have sufficed, but sure. I'm giving the story. You spoke to Dua Lipa recently. Yes. I'm sorry. I'm a bad friend. He spoke to Dua Lipa recently. Yes. I'm sorry. I'm a bad friend. I haven't actually listened to it yet. So you were going to play it for us here, right?

The chat. Yeah. Then I've got some stuff to talk about after it. So do I. I've got a bone to pick with you about this interview. Me? Yeah. Have you heard it?

No, I haven't heard the interview, but there's something else. Oh, about the whole event. Yeah. Oh, okay. But I heard that you were saying that you were worried that she hates you because of something you said. Yeah. No, not that she hated me.

I was worried. It didn't start off. I made a joke that did not land. Anyway, I'll explain it all after. We'll roll the interview. Here it is. Mr. Willipa, hello. Hi.

How are we? I'm really good. I'm really, really good. Isn't this rubbish where we are? I know. It's terrible, honestly. It's awful. I mean, let's paint a picture.

I think I saw a sea turtle just beneath our feet before. It was stunning. Yeah, and the water is so clear. Crystal clear. It's insane. We're in Hamilton Island. I mean, look at us go. I know.

You're on a yacht. I've really gone up in the world. Yesterday, I was in my hotel room. I was trying to geolocate where you were. I'm like, can I go find Dua Lipa and swim out to you? But no, it would not have worked. Very excited to have you. How are you feeling?

So the time of this recording, you've done AMAs, hopped on a plane, and you went to Arias, a night of nights. How did that happen? Is that like a slogan for it, the night of nights? Yeah. I feel like people say that a lot. Arias, the night of nights.

I'm like, wow. We don't have much else. We have arias as our Grammys, and then the Logies as our golden globes. Cool. And we only have the two. And then we get a big star every year, and you were the star this year.

Oh, thank you. Talk to me about that. So you had AMAs. The performance was incredible. Thank you. Do you do the same choreo for every show? For this song, we've been making it a thing, yeah. But we just kind of modify it for

every performance yeah um depending on the stage and we just change it up a little bit but yeah it's the same choreography yeah it's almost like because we didn't really do choreography for the music video the music video was very like free form and fun kind of like a crazy night out but the choreography just was like it brought like a new dimension to the song and was really fun to do it because it's very like disco orientated. Yeah. And so it was only right to just have an ongoing choreography part. Yeah. AMAs, on a plane, two arias.

Yes. And now you're here. You did Sunrise this morning. Yeah. It was a pleasure to watch you. It was crazy. Thank you. Thank you so much.

Are you exhausted? Do you know what? I'm all right, actually. Waking up at 3 a.m. bizarrely was okay. Yeah. Because of the jet lag, like it was like midday in London or something. Yeah, right. So I'm feeling very okay with it all. You're in cycle.

Yeah. Yeah. So it's good. Yeah, and we're off to Tokyo tomorrow. Fun. Are you missing home? I've only just started my like trip abroad. Of course, I always miss miss my family and my friends.

But it's all worth it. I'm so happy to get to do what I love. When Don't Start Now, before it came out, I got an email from Grace from your label, and she was like, we want you to hear the song. And at the radio station, I'm like, I'm just a nobody, like a shit kicker. So they're like, we want you to hear the song.

No, it's true. It is true. I was cleaning the basement of the radio station a year ago, and now on the air with you. So a pinch kicker. So they're like, we want you to hear the song. No, it's true. It is true. Like I was cleaning the basement of the radio station a year ago and now on the air with you. So a pinch myself moment. I love that. That's so good. Yeah, I was Mitch the coffee bitch. I think everyone's got to start somewhere.

You do. But it's amazing and inspiring that you've done that. Oh, thank you. Look at this. You should be so happy. I made a vanilla latte for Fifth Harmony once, but I didn't have any vanilla. So I put eight sugars in each.

And they were like, we'll get a vanilla latte, please. I'm like, no worries, can do. And they just pumped it with sugar. And they did not know the difference. You've got to make it work. I'm dying. I know. When I watched YouTube tutorials on how to froth milk, you know.

See, that's what I mean. It's like you make do with what you've got. You've got to hustle. And that's why you're where you are. Exactly right. And they said, we want you to hear the song. And I was like i was like okay great so what they did was they put someone in a taxi they sent them to work with a ue boom we sat in like a broom closet uh so no one else could hear and then we put the volume on like six and like okay so this is the song no one can hear it but we're playing

it to you so you can talk about it on the show when it comes out i'm like great we played it on volume three so we both had to lean into this ue boom and then we're bopping our heads along and then we hear the cowbell and then we just stop i mean the cowbell just stops the nation now i know everyone's going to be asking you about the cowbell yeah but i want to know was it a literal cowbell um like a real one or was it like a button effect cowbell do you know what you'd have to ask ian he's the one who went in and did like the production for it so um i have to ask the mastermind but i i have a good feeling it's a real one because ian loves to keep really crazy instruments around right so you never actually saw a literal cowbell i didn't see the literal cowbell i was hoping there was a cowbell and an

action from double leaper and we'd see it it was actually me doing the cowbell um we love the song. How do you feel? I feel like you can just make that the album. Just put that on ten times. Ten times, yeah. I appreciate that. Don't you feel proud of the song?

I'm really proud of it. I'm really proud of the album in general. It's a lot of fun and I feel like I've grown so much as an artist and I'm just excited for you guys to hear the rest of the music. Yeah. And when are we getting it? A couple of days, right?

The title? The title comes in December 1st. Okay. And then album comes next year. Right. And then I'll be releasing music until then. And you'll be touring with the album next year? Yes.

Yeah. Around the world? Yes, absolutely. Coming down under? Of course. And you'll be here for Mardi Gras? I will be here for Mardi Gras. I will be here for Mardi Gras. That'll be fun.

Yeah. Oh my God. This year I was on a float, not intentionally. I wasn't meant to be on a float. Interesting. I was filler. They're like, get on the float because the stars aren't here, of the radio show I work at, and they never turned up.

So they were like, just go, just start the float. So I was on Oxford Street, on the parade, on this giant set of headphones as a float. Everyone's like, who is that guy? I was just waving. It was great. Mardi Gras in Sydney is the best in the world. You're going to have so much fun. I absolutely can't wait.

It's going to be a lot of fun. Was that something that crossed your mind as a maybe? Or you were like, no, I have to do Mardi Gras. Oh, no. When I got asked to do it, I was like, absolutely, yes, let's do it. Yeah. Do you have Mardi Gras in the UK? Is it Pride?

We have Pride, yeah. Yeah. We have Pride, which is really fun. I mean, there's Pride all over England. Yeah. But I've never done Mardi Gras in the UK? Is it Pride? We have Pride, yeah. Yeah. We have Pride, which is really fun. I mean, there's Pride all over England. Yeah. But I've never done Mardi Gras. Yeah, it's like, it's crazy. You'll have so much fun.

Yeah, I can't wait. The queer fan base love you. You're like an icon. Thank you. They really sort of latch onto you and your music. I think the disco vibe has always been, like, at its core, quite queer. And I love the music. Thank you so much. You're just the disco queen. Like, that's where you are. I'll take it. In queer. And I love the music. Thank you so much.

I think you're just the disco queen. That's where you are. I'll take it. In our minds. I'm excited about the whole new disco era. I just feel like I haven't really heard it so much on the radio. And that's why I just wanted to play around with different sounds. And I'm grateful for the response and happy to do it.

Well, that's how I feel when I play Don't Start Now on the radio. It doesn't sound like anything that we have. Thank you. Like, it stands out. We're playing it on loop. It doesn't sound like anything that we have. Thank you. Like it stands out. We're playing it on loop. It's one of those songs that we play every hour. And people are like, oh, it's Dua Lipa. We'll get away with it.

We're playing your song every hour and Dance Monkey, Tones and I. Dope. Have you heard that song? Of course I've heard the song. How cool is that song? It's so good. And it's just a feel-good track. Yeah.

So, yeah. And she picked up a bunch of awards at the Arias. Yeah, she did. She nailed it. Yeah, she did. Best pop release, I think. She was busking in Byron Bay, which is close to here, close to Hamilton.

Oh, cool. Like a year ago, a busker. I'm looking at her now. Yeah. Thank you so much for hanging out. Thank you so much for having me. It's been amazing. Thank you.

Can't wait for the album. Yes, me too. I feel like I want to yell into the ether and just yell out. Do it. Do it. Should we? No, you do it. You're not going to yell at me?

I don't know what you do it for. Oh, okay. What should I say? I don. You're not going to yell at me? I want to watch you do it first. Oh, okay. What should I say? I don't know. What did you want to say? I don't know. I just am feeling the energy. I'm getting a very, you don't want to scream.

No, I want to watch you do it first. All right. We'll just say Australia loves Dua. Well, that'd be weird for me to say. Okay. Why don't we say stream, don't start now. Okay. Okay.

That's good, right? Get a plug in. The label's happy with that. All right. On three, we're going to count down. How loud are we going? Loud. Oh, we'll all scream it, but you start now. Okay. Okay, that's good, right? Get a plug in. The label's happy with that. All right, on three, we're going to count down. How loud are we going? Oh, we'll all scream it, but you can just do, you've got to save your vocals. So you just go stream, don't start now.

Into the ether. We're at Hamilton Island, overlooking the ocean. On three. One, two, three. Let's do a leaper. Stream, don't start now. Ah, that was so good. That was louder than I thought you'd give me.

Well done. I can't imagine if I just whispered it. No, no. Stream, don't start now. No, I couldn't leave you'd give me. Well done. Imagine if I just whispered it. I know. Stream, don't start now. No, I couldn't leave you hanging like that. No, you couldn't. It would be an ASMR moment with your nails. Oh, yeah.

That would be fun. Stream, don't start now. Stream, don't start now. Julie, but thank you so much. Thank you. Great to have you. I appreciate your time. Thank you so much.

See you next year. Yeah, that last bit. She really, yeah. Not that she sounded like she didn't like you at the start, but she warmed up to you by the end. Like, you guys are having fun. I was like, oh, good on you. She likes you.

Yeah, by the end we were having real fun. To get her to yell off, you should have seen it. The photos are on, actually, we'll put one up on IJM. You will. But I'll do it. If it's not there, it's because we're relying on Mitch's memory. Because I've forgotten. And I got her to yell off the balcony.

We'll put the footage up. I'll put the footage up. And I was surprised that happened. She kind of looked at her label. There was about 20 people off camera. It looks like it was me and Dua. There were 20. There were two makeup people.

There were the label people. There was a manager. There was two security guards. I'd hate that. Yeah, it was intense. And I was a bit thrown. So I think that's what happened at the start of the interview. But it was great by the end.

So why were you worried that she hated you? You said that you were worried that you offended her. But there was nothing offensive in that. Yeah, well, so I made a joke before the mics were rolling. It was sort of I sat down, she sat down. Oh, so it wasn't in it. No, it wasn't in the interview. Right.

It was while everyone was setting up around us. So I was there sitting there, and I didn't just want to sit there like this. Hello. Before the interview, I wanted to make sure. I hate that part. It's the most awkward part. So I'm like, I'll make a joke and I'll warm it up.

So I'd been on Hamilton Island for like 12 hours, and it's beautiful. It's so nice. But as soon as it hits six o'clock, it's almost like no one is there. And then all these bats appear as the sun's setting. People leave the island. There's nowhere to eat dinner after six o'clock but one restaurant. Like you've got no choice.

That is Hamilton Island in a nutshell. So I'm sitting opposite Dua Lipa and I go, oh, Dua, how beautiful is Hamilton Island? She's like, it's so nice. It's absolutely stunning. I love it. And I'm like, yeah. I'm like, but don't you get like weird North Korean vibes from the place? And then she's like, and I was like, yeah, after six o'clock, no one's anywhere.

And then you can't eat here. You can't eat there. You got to ride around on golf buggies. It's like it's run by Kim Jong-un. The buildings are big. And she looks at her people and she's like, right, let's not. Maybe let's stop this. And I was like, yeah.

Oh, yeah, you're right. You're right. Not a good way to start. But you were on a boat. You were on a yacht and it looked beautiful. And she's like, right. And I'm like, fuck, I've ruined it. So she thought, did she think you were recording?

Yes. She thought this was my bit. You opened with a North Korea joke. Yeah, and it did not land. It didn't help that you just told a story that you dress as Kim Jong-un. Kim Jong-un, I know, I know. Not ideal. Not good.

Oh, I'm sorry. I should have whipped out that photo and been like, look, I do a great impression. No. So it almost tanked, but I won her over by making her yell. Yeah, no, she loved you by the end. You could tell.

Yeah, yeah. We got along like a house on fire. And she gave me a kiss and did it. And she's like, do you want to do an Insta story? And I'm like, yeah. So the fact that she offered. That is good, actually. They never offer.

Yeah, it was really nice and like if you watch she's like all over me and cuddling so we were great friends by the end but I think she got my shtick

which is kind of like I'm the goofy one and she sort of no that's clear to everyone let me just assure you but hold on you don't hide it well no no definitely not

you said you have an issue with the interview though right no no the interview no issue with that at all. But I just thought it was strange. And this is not a dig at you. It's just a dig at lots of people that do the same thing, that you were all over social media being like,

oh, Dua Lipa's co-hosting with me. I just think that the general public know the difference between an interview and someone co-hosting. Like she wasn't co-hosting. You were talking to her about her new song for her own commercial gain. Yeah. When I hear co-hosting, I think somebody's sitting at a panel with somebody else.

Like imagine Koshi just interviewing Samantha Armitage for three hours. Like that's not what co-hosting is, but that's what you and Dewa did. I know. Dewa's co-hosting with me. Oh, I had the perfect guest co-hosting is, but that's what you and Dewar did. I know. Dewar's co-hosting with me. Oh, I had the perfect guest co-host of the year. You spoke to her for seven minutes. It's not just you that does it. I see people in radio do it all the time.

It's like, oh, tomorrow morning, Michelle Bridges co-host with Buzz and Gang Bang on the Rock. No, she's not. She's going to talk about her shit book. She's not co-hosting. It's the opposite. No, you're right. There's such a difference. She's not co-hosting. It's the opposite. No, you're right. There's such a difference between being interviewed and co-hosting. Very true.

Matt Preston co-hosting with Trevor and Tom. Is he? Julie Goodwin. Actually, no, she is the co-host. She is the co-host, yeah. Oh, Julie Goodwin. You remember her from MasterChef, right? Of course.

She won the first year. She hosts a radio show and they full name her because she's famous. Yeah. But her co-host clearly has this radio name that he's not willing to let go. He's Rabbit. So the show is Rabbit and Julie Goodwin. Literally sounds like something she'd cook. It sounds so weird pairing a full name with an animal.

It's like, oh, Spider and Denise. Yeah. Greg and Cassowary. Margaret and Tarantula. In the morning. Wake up with Ward, Hogg and Wendy. Magpie and Beryl. No, it is a radio trope, though.

That's what we do because it makes it sound bigger than it is. And she was – So you're setting people up for disappointment. No, for that hour it was Dua and I on the show. So are you saying that if I titled this podcast Dua Lipa co-hosts Is It Just Me? No. That wouldn't be clickbait? No, because normally when you have an interview you give it three minutes on the radio and you're done.

You play the song and you're done. What interviews are you listening to? My show. That might be the rule for Dingbat and Marie. Most interviews go for like 15 minutes on radio. Widgety Grub and Michael for the drive home. Dashend and Dave.

Sorry, we're getting sidetracked. This is just awful. I'm trying to think of exotic animals. Yeah. Toucan and Terrence for the 3pm pickup. Oh god. Rabbit and Julie Goodman I can't take it seriously You know what I listened to the other day Margaret

I listened to that new Nelly and the Now Wall show It's phenomenal Oh my god Sperm whale and Sally Louise and Ladybug Oh it's a beautiful little show Pelican and Belinda That's funny Louise and Ladybug. Oh, it's a beautiful little show. Pelican and Belinda.

That's funny. Holy fuck. Oh, Jenna. Oh, Jenna. Dingo and Delilah. I forgot what we were talking about. Dually, but co-hosting. Yeah, look, she didn't co-host, but I had dedicated an hour to her and we played five of her songs.

Hang on, hang on, hang on, hang on. How did you spread that seven-minute interview across an hour? I made it work. Jenna, what's 60 divided by seven? That's a good question. Let's see. Do it, Jen. 8.57.

Imagine being a Dua Lipa fan just being like, fuck, man, stop giving it to me in sprinkles. You're like Hansel and Gretel just sprinkling crumbs in your wall. There was one point where I, you would have just heard it then, where I ask her about the cowbell, you know, like the ding-ding in the song. I'm like, where did the cowbell come from?

Was it a literal cowbell? Was there a cow in studio? Like, is it a sound effect? We just heard it. I know. Just from my own memory. And she gave me the answer and she's like, yeah, it was actually, and I cut it on there.

I'm like, oh, if you want to hear if it's real, stick around. I'll play the rest in 15 minutes. 15 minutes? I literally cut the poor bitch off mid-breath. Fuck me. The answer for that is. But how is that co-hosting? Like I expect you to be like coming up on Mitch till midnight.

Yeah, exactly. That's not co-hosting. Well, at least I've got a radio show. Okay. I thought that was going to have more of an impact than it did. I'm not jealous. I'm happy for you. Thank you.

Well done on your interview. You know what? I think you're completely misleading your audience by saying that she was a co-host, but that's not just you. Everyone does it. So many people said to me, hey, congratulations on that tour interview. And I'm like, I've done it before. I've had Jess Malboy on the phone multiple times.

Yeah, you had her on the phone. We put it as a bonus episode of this podcast. This is my second time speaking to Dua Lipa. I've had many other people. Kelly Rowland, Guy Sebastian. Who's the shittest interview you've ever done? Oh, look, quietly. I'm not going to say it.

Anyone that comes through the doors of Mitch Till Midnight, I am blessed to have them. Well, this is what I don't understand. You can interview Dua Lipa. You had Lauv on the other week. You've got these big names on your show. All I ask for is a piddly fucking Vanessa Amorosi interview. Hold on.

Where is it? Hold on. I can finally announce. What? Look at this. I got a reply. Yes, all good, mate. From who?

She's on the show next week. Bullshit. Vanessa Amorosi, absolutely everybody fame. Yep. I did not think you were going to pull through. I pulled through. She cancelled three times. She actually did three times.

Oh, no. Three times. No, but she didn't know what the podcast was. It's not like she got wind of what this trash is. Fuck, no one tell her. No one tell her. We've got a week. Yeah, look, we have quite a string of this.

So many things could go wrong between now and next week. I know. But currently it's me and it's you and it's Jenna and it's Vanessa Amorosi for the final show of 2019. Great. That's impressive. I actually just think that she's got really strong

vocals. Like she's underrated. If you don't know who she is or if you're an international listener, she's like, she was Australia's golden child. You just said was. You're not going this isn't going well already. Oh, he's just cancelled. She is Australia's golden child. You just said was. You're not going. This isn't going well already. Oh, he's just cancelled. She is Australia's golden child. But in her heyday, everyone was like, Vanessa Amorosi's the shit.

Yeah, and it's been a while since she's put new music out. And she's got a new album out. And I loved it. So I've been saying to you, even on air, on the cloud, I beg yours. In this show, I've been saying, where the fuck's Vanessa Amorosi? Yeah, she's got Hello World out now, I think. Hello World. That's not the Saddle Club Yeah, she's got Hello World out now, I think. Hello World. That's not the Saddle Club theme song.

It's Hello Me. Yeah. Hello World. Hello World. Anyway, Vanessa Amorosi on the show next week, apparently. So tune in for that, guys. This is all riding on me for the final show of the year. Can I go through?

You walked yourself into that. You should have said nothing. I know, I really should have. You promised it now. I really just don't shut up, do I? I think I've just realised. It's a problem. It is a problem. You should have said nothing. I know, I really should have. You promised it now. I really just don't shut up, do I? I think I've just realised. It's a problem. It is a problem. We should wrap. It's definitely something that you're not my cup of coffee listeners

miss about the girls. They just keep their trap shut. Next week on the show, the girls from Not My Cup of Tea. They're coming on. Okay, I'm excited. We have a detention, I'm not going to lie. What? Well, you had a show with them and it was, you know Mildly successful And now you're here

On a supremely successful show With a radio star It's almost like Why would you go back? And I know you're not saying You would but I mean You know what I mean It's like

That's a jealous ex I'm not jealous but Sorry no you're not You're not the ex You're the new one You're jealous of my ex No you need to go Babe it's fine

I don't miss them Who's the radio star You're on fine. I don't miss them. Who's the radio star you're on with? I don't know. Really? Guess who's co-hosting my show with me tonight? Who? Paulini.

She's not driving here, though. She's walking. Imagine if we did radio show names where you paired a name, like a has-been pop star that would absolutely accept any radio gig, with an item of food. I was just thinking that. Sarah Marie and finger buns. Wake up with Pauline and fig. Kate DeRouge and hash browns.

Oh, God, we need to go. Burt Newton, foe. Anyway, next week on the show, Vanessa Amorosi, like we said. We'll catch you then, guys. It's going to be fun. We'll see you then. See you next week. Bye.

Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. All right. Welcome to ADD Brief. Welcome. I'm so sorry, Jenna. We were meant to do Jenna's Young, but we got carried away. I know.

We got carried away with her stupid names. Yeah, we did. Frog Leg Lily. But I will just jump in quickly. Remember, phone line's open. Sorry, it's not recording. One sec. Mars Baron Mary Magdalene.

I mentioned that. That's funny. I will say, though, this is the part of the show where you can phone in. The number is 889-664-902. That's the old, I don't know where that one comes from. Yeah, what's the code of that? That one's piercing. 664-33-092. Do you reckon we should still do Jenna's Junk? Because I know that the rule in ADD Brief,

oh fuck, I forgot to explain it to people. Explain it, go for it. Welcome to ADD Brief. It's our secret segment. The first half of the show is planned, well, we didn't plan half of that rubbish, but we put in effort to the first half of the show. The next half is just us rattling on aimlessly. We let our ADD run free. We don't stay on track. We don't stay focused.

The rule usually is that we don't plan anything, and it's totally unscripted. Is it breaking the rule if we do Jenna's Junk? Because that's technically a planned segment. Oh, we've done it before, right? Yeah, we've done it. I think we do it. The people love it.

I have to do my part. Hold on. I've got to do this. All right. This is just something that I've created. I worked hand part. Hold on. I've got to do this. All right. This is just something that I've created. I worked hand in hand with the techs

to get this up and running. Radio podcast first. Radio podcast. You can live tweet to the show and if you're listening live, just hit us a little tweet and we'll read it out

on the air. None have come through. I'm a little bit shocked. I'm not going to lie. That is strange. It is odd, isn't it? Well, you know, that's the through. I'm a little bit shocked. I'm not going to lie. That is strange. It is odd, isn't it? Well, you know, that's the technology. Sometimes it works.

Oh, my God! There you go. It's Dua Lipa! Oh, my God. She said, I loved your joke. Would love to see that Kim Jong-un photo. No, Dua, that is in the archives. That's gone.

It's a notification from North Korea. I'm on the blacklist. I'm banned. I'm banned. Let's a notification from North Korea. I'm on the blacklist. So I'm banned. I'm banned. Let's do Jenna's Junk. It's very exciting. Yes. Tweet in if you want to hear it.

Who's that? Oh, my God. It's our favourite radio show. Guess who that is. That's Rabbit. He says, love the show, boys. He thinks you're a boy. Not again.

Not again. That's the second time he's misgendered you. Not on my watch, Rabbit. Okay. So this is very again. That's the second time he's misgendered you. Not on my watch, rabbit. Okay, so this is very exciting. Let's jump in. Let's take a peek at Jenna's Junk, shall we? If you're new here, haven't

heard Jenna's Junk before, it's basically all of our shit bits that we decided not to talk about because they weren't interesting enough. Jenna rummages through our trash apparently. She's the groundskeeper, so it's her job. She's got those fingernails. It's like a claw machine at a Chinese restaurant. Come on.

Or they're like one of those claws at the skill tester, and you're like, oh, I thought I had that cherry right. When it goes like this and then lets it go, it goes, chicken, what's Jenna's hand? Okay, let's move on. We have Ijeoms at the start of every show. These are the ones that didn't make it, the junk. Because between the two of us, we just thought,

no, I'm not going to talk about that. Put it in the trash. Jenna rummages through and brings it back like a bloody boomerang. That's what I do. So, Jenna, go to the bin, please. Okay, heading to the bin. Jenna, people aren't dumb. Go to the gym, please.

The gym. Oh, what a Freudian slip that was. Jenna, I think he's saying that you've got a bit portly. How rude. Have you heard about the pot that's sent to the kettle? No, no, no. Jenna, I'm so sorry. I'm sorry.

Just go to the bin, please. Go. Are you fart-assing around while you try and find a sound effect? And she's hit the bin. Are you still traumatised from being dacked in school? That was me. I put that in there. That's a new one.

Yep. Say, are you? 100% I am. Really? I remember the bastard's name. Who? Jan van Wyk. Who?

What? Some South African clown that went to my school. That sounds like a composer. I know, right? Jan van Wyk at the Opera House. When Jan van Wyk and Andrew Lloyd Webber joined forces. Oh, it's unreal. You know who I love?

That Andre Yenwick and Andre Rieu. I love those two. Did you get double-dacked? No, thankfully. But can I tell you how fucking tightly I tied my drawstring every day thereafter? But it cut off the circulation on my tush. It was so tight. I was not risking that shit happening again.

Probably have underdevelopment. In hindsight, probably everyone forgot about it 10 minutes later, but in my mind, it was the talk of the school. Well, I – this is awful. I was dacked in primary school, but then I climbed the pecking order in high school, and I wasn't the dacker, but I'd order the dacks. You know what I mean? I'd be like, dack Jamie Lee, and they'd go.

Really? Who's they? Who were your bitches? Oh, just the boys. I was a real part be like, Dak, Jamie Lee. Really? Who's they? Who are your bitches? Oh, just the boys. I was a real part of the boys. Oh, yeah. I was one of the boys. I had girlfriends.

Where are the boys these days? You know what? I actually wanted to do this on the air. I'm still part of the boys' group chat, and all they do is send nudes of girls that they've met on Tinder and be derogatory. It's called Brothers with a love heart and two S's. What do you contribute to this?

And also, why are they sending nudes of people that trusted them with them? That's really bad. Take me home, Scoomo Tree Road? Country Road. I get it. Country Road! Because it's a photo of Scott Morrison. Oh, God, I'm going to reply.

Funny one, boys. Can you send a voice message with that exact tone? No. Let's try to find, because my message will come up in blue. Right? Here we go. They just did a poll the other day. Yeah. Who's keen on farm from Friday the 29th to November 1st? They've all said yeah. What does that mean?

They've all said yeah. They want to go on a farm trip. In November. I haven't replied in months. Look, I just don't know. Yeah, no, there's absolutely nothing. I'm scrolling. The boys. Can you hear me? I'm going to make you leave the chat. It's for your own growth. No, I like to be in it.

I like being in it because I like to just. Do you have notifications off? It's muted. I haven't heard a notification since you said informal. We've all got group chats like that. I'm out of it. Anyway, I'd be like, go and DAC these people. So I have been DAC'd.

I know the pain, but then I grew when I was the DAC-er. You bastard. No, sorry. You didn't want to touch anyone's pants because it might look gay. Yeah, I know. The only thing, I'll DAC as a want to touch anyone's pants because it might look gay. Yeah, I know. The only thing I'll deck is a girl, but it's a shame they're in dresses. I'll deck her kilt, bro. Go back in the truck.

A plain snacks made up brands. I'll claim this one. Wait, what? A plain snacks made up brands. It's aeroplane snacks. Oh, I thought you meant plain as in like flavourless. No, it's plain food, just completely fake brands. I was on a flight the other day back from Hamilton Island

with Dua Lipa and the flight attendant comes across and then she's like, would you like a Honey Nut Valley Macadamia bar? I'm like, that doesn't exist. You've made that up. That's true actually. You never see those products anywhere else. On earth.

Yeah, wow. I've never noticed. She's like, would you like a yoghurt? I'm like, I love a yog see those products anywhere else. On Earth. Yeah, wow. I've never noticed. She's like, would you like a yogurt? I'm like, I love a yogurt. Gives it to me. The logo is a koala hugging a cow. And I'm like, that's not a logo of any company that exists. And the yogurt was delightful.

But it was like from a made-up town. It was like Derulican. What was the made-up town? Derulican. From the Derulican Valley. I'm like, no, that's not a real valley. Oh, Darulican. That's next door to...

No, that's next door to Crasselbush. No, Crasselbush. Crasselbush. Oh, that's... You're thinking if that's in Western Australia. Oh, yeah. The South Australian town of... Yeah, Warringtonby.

Yeah. Warringtonby. I think that's actually a place. Is it really? Warrington is. Oh. Yeah. Very good red rooster in Warrington.

I'm not going to lie. I'm sure there is. I get texts from them all the time Do you actually? Yes Why? Because I bought Red Rooster at Warrington once When I was getting

And I got it delivered And now they send me texts all the time I'm like oh someone likes me Red Rooster One mailing list I'd like to be added to Anyway yeah I just feel like the pine fruit isn't I can never find it If we have any flight attendants listening

Let me know where you get that from. I'd genuinely be very interested to know. That's a good point. I don't know why that went in the trash, Mitch. I would have been able to find that. Okay, I'm bored. Let's move on. Is year four useless?

That's me again. Oh, my God. Let's just run through the years. If you're an American listener, we have kindy, which is the first year. Massive year for you, personally. First year of big school. You know what I mean? Year one, huge. American listener, we have kindy, which is the first year. Massive year for you, personally. First year of big school. You know what I mean? Year one, huge. You're finally out of kindy. You know what I mean?

Yeah. Year two's almost far out. I've moved on. I can speak now and I can wipe my own butt. And then year three is when you're not on the infant you're in primary school. Correct. Year four, nothing. Nothing happens. You don't get your pen licence for another year or two. No, I got mine in year four.

Yeah, I got mine in year four. Really? Maybe you're just slow. I never got my pen licence. I never got my pen licence. Give me that pen now. I'm still writing in pencil. You give me that kilometrico right now.

I always carry a trusty HB. And year four's nothing. Year five is like, I'm almost a senior. Year six, you're a senior. And it goes on. But year four, nothing happens. Nah, year four was a big year for me. I moved from Bougainvillea Public to the bloody Catholic primary school and I regret it every day since.

Jesus Christ, that would have been horrendous for you. The private Catholic school in Forbes is atrocious. I would go back to Bougainvillea in a heartbeat. Would have been bad for them too, I can imagine. Who? Their school. Having you in their corridors. Yeah, I was a deep shame to that place. I bet you were. Yes. I got very fat at that school because that's all I did. Were you miserable? Oh, I hated it. Oh, I was a deep shame to that place. I bet you were. Yes, I got very fat at that school

because that's all I did. Were you miserable? Oh, I hated it. Oh, Midge. I even said to my parents that I wanted to go back and they were like, no, no, it's best for your future. Now look where I am. Here with us, a radio star and a possum. Alright. Why do news readers say, that's right, at the

start of a report? Oh, that's mine. No, I think I'm onto something here. This is a very good point. What do you mean? Well, you know when, so the news anchor, so like the bitch at the desk, says, oh, there's been shocking scenes at a robbery in Western Sydney this morning. Let's go live to Lizzie Pearl, who is at the scene.

Lizzie, parents and children were very stunned watching on. And then Lizzie goes, that's right Deb. It's like, I just hope one day that they disagree. Like, oh I don't know. Give me a fake news reporter's name. Lucinda Thomas. Lucinda Thomas is at the scene of the horrific bushfires and Lucinda, families were lucky to escape in time. No, no Deb, I don't know where you got that. No, no, I don't know much about that, Deb. Back to you.

Greg Thomas is at the scene. Greg, apparently the tsunami washed away the entire village. No, Lee, I'm in the village and nothing is wet. Like, why do they need to agree with them? Of course that they're on the same page. They're journalists. Brett, drought has ravished the town. You're on the scene.

Casey, you're a slut. I was born and raised here. There's no drought. We're, in fact, actually pouring water onto the ground celebrating. So you've got your wires crossed. And we cross now to Jeremy Markson, who is at the scene of an armed robbery in Sydney's West. And Jeremy, the attendant there at the petrol station

is being hailed as a hero this morning. I wouldn't say that, Deb. No, he's not. Really? No. And we go to Brett Levington at the scene of a murder. The killer has been apprehended. Brett?

No, Casey. He's still on the fucking loose here. We're all actually on the edge of our seats somewhere in the area and we just cannot seem to locate him. Everyone should run. All right, that was a good one. That's like my airplane food. I should have given that more backing.

That should have been a main engine. Oh, she's going. Diving back down to the vent. She loves it down there. He's like a real person. Is it just me or are all older ladies smelling the same? Well, that's me. It's not older ladies, not like in their 50s, but once you hit 80.

It says older Well I'm talking seniors They all have the same smell of like Pure milk You know what I mean It's like a real thick creamy smell It's almost like their skin is just excreting dairy Yeah I don't know if it's a dairy smell

There's definitely some like Like floral moisturiser thrown in the mix In the case of women. Do you have any cash on you? Me? Yeah. Yeah. Smell the cash.

Okay. Got an Australian $20 note. Oh, yeah. That's exactly what my grandparents' clothing and their car smells like. I have this theory that they've got all this cash hoarded in the boot because their car smells like that and so does all their clothing. Isn't that weird? Anyone who's got cash on them, 2019, probably not many, give that shit a whiff.

That's what my grandparents smell like. It's so odd. That's actually very funny. I think I can relate. Wow. My grandparents are not rich at all. Neither are mine. They're clutching at what they've got.

All hidden in the floorboards. Oh, that was a good one. I liked that. That was my own. You're like the newsreader validating yourself. That's right. I like that. Oh, it was my own.

You're like the new three to validating yourself. That's right. Is the word Boosie absolutely no fucking good? Yeah, the word Boosie sucks. Boosie? Sounds like Gary Boosie, the actor. Boosie? Is he an actor? Yeah, Gary Boosie, yeah.

Or is he a singer? I don't know what he does. I don't know what he does. He just yells. Barely alive. Oh, sorry. I was thinking of Gary V. I know Gary Boosie. Yeah, gotcha. Listen here, iPad. I don't know what he does. He just yells. Barely alive. Oh, sorry. I was thinking of Gary V. I know Gary Busey.

Yeah, gotcha. Listen here, iPad. You need to get on the iPad. Gary. Yeah, bussy is a colloquialism for males, but used like a female's vaginal. So bussy means boy pussy. Oh, it's a bit visceral, isn't it? People often hit me up on Grindr and say, like, there's no tact on Grindr.

They just go, hey, can I fuck your pussy? And I'm like, absolutely not. You know what? Maybe it's like men, gay men, clinging to some form of heterosexuality. So they're like, oh, it's not actually that gay because it's the pussy. You know what I mean? I'm not reading a bloke. It's the pussy.

Yeah. Oh, yuck. I hate it. I'm going nowhere near his poop shoot. I'm doing his pussy. Even as I say the word, I hate it. And people use it all the time. Do. Oh, yuck. I hate it. I'm going nowhere near his poop shoot. I'm doing his pussy. Even as I say the word, I hate it. And people use it all the time. Do you use it?

No. If I had to use our word, I'd use that. That's what I'm saying. What do you mean if you had to? Well, yeah, I have used it. Not in a fucking speech. I haven't addressed the UN. I never asked that.

The biggest issue facing the nation. He's pussy. Does Hayden, I don't want to get too TMI, although we are at the end of the show. Yeah. Does he like you referring to it as a Bussy? I don't know. You'd have to ask him. But I don't...

It's not... It's been said. Does he refer to his own as a, like a, hey, Mitch, here's my... No, he doesn't refer to it as anything. If anyone's referring to it, it's me. Does he say anything, like... No, I'm not going into our personal bedroom lives because i know one of my friends oh this is getting really one of my

friends told me that one of their favorite lines that often gets people going if they go oh f me boy hole and i think that's just as bad as yeah that's horrendous i just think of some sort of marion marinara and trench i just i hate it when they try and disguise that area as being cute. It's like, I'd actually rather not draw attention to the fact that this is what we're doing. Yeah, I agree. I agree. Let's move on. It's both fucked that we enjoy it.

Let's just not discuss it. Yeah, yeah. We both have to sleep at night knowing that's what we do. Let's not talk about it anymore. Hold on, hold on. What's going on? Sorry. Who are you ringing?

Your boyfriend. No, don't ring him. He's at work. Is he? Sorry. Who are you ringing? Your boyfriend. No, don't ring him. He's at work. Is he? Do not. What are you going to ask? Well, you wouldn't answer whether he likes... Hey, this is Hayden Hickson.

I'm sorry I can't get to the phone right now, but please leave your name, number and a quick message and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. Cheers. Hi, babe. I just had a question because Mitch wouldn't answer. Don't answer him! He's respecting your privacy.

I just wanted to know what your preferred nickname for your rectum is. Oh, Mitchell! Whether you're partial to Bussy or not. Wrap it up! Hope you're well. Bye now. Love you. Anyway. Hey, no, very good Wrap it up! Hope you're well. Bye now. Love you. Anyway.

Hayden, I have a very good friend. He's ill at the moment. Is he? Yeah, his Bussi's the pain in the ass. All right. Jenna's jumping into the trash. This has to be the last one. We need to end.

Go, Jenna. Why does Jenna wail? Like, she's a Maori woman who's just lost her husband. Because only Maori women get upset when they're widowed. Yeah, that was really inappropriate. Cut that. Disgusting. I'm not cutting it.

Are you? No comment. I think people connect best with raw and unedited audio, which is why when you say something fucked, unless it's absolutely fucked, it's just saying it in there. Israel Folau's going to hate me even more. Going after his people. Is it bad?

This is terrible. But you know how Israel Folau did that thing recently where he got up at church and said, oh, the bushfires or the drought, it's all because we allowed gay marriage. And I was like, obviously this isn't actually what I think. But there was a fleeting moment where my mind was like, oh, fuck, he has a point. Because as soon as everything got better for my people, it all went downhill for my parents. I was like, fuck, does he have a point? Obviously, I've rationalized that thought and realized that there's absolutely no correct

connection. But there was a moment where I was like, fuck, Israel's onto something. Oh, that's actually Jesus Christ himself. He's saying no, no correlation at all. So that's good. Did you realize he was on Twitter? Thank you, Jesus. Yeah. Amen. you, Jesus. Yeah, amen.

Hi, Jesus. Oh, he said there's a two-for-one movie deal, which is great. So we can all go together. In hell. So we'll just carpool. Oh, my YouFoods is ready. Sorry, you carry on. I'll just go get it.

Well, anyway, is that all you've got left in the trash? No, there was one more. End it with one more. That's all that's in the trash. Oh. Really? Oh. I know.

Wow. Because we usually only have good talking points. No, because you didn't have enough. You didn't have enough. You didn't do much work. Don't yell, Jenna. We're not generating enough ideas. Is that the problem?

Generating. That could be a good segment. Generating. What does that segment mean? I don't know. Generating. Jenna is rating things. This is your problem.

You come up with a catchy name, but no concept to match it. What did we say we were going to do for the show? We're going to spin to a fake cheese fake um cheese wheel we said we do oh the chocolate wheel prize yeah i've gotten a lot of good feedback about that segment it wasn't even a segment we've done it once i know and people just come like the things that we it's weird the things that you don't expect to catch on other things that catch on like you and your fake town names that's what i've gotten the most amount of feedback of. Oh, that was my favourite thing.

I laughed so hard. Or the chocolate wheel thing that you did last week. I don't even remember it. That's how bad my memory is. You were just thinking of random prizes on the spot. Oh, let's cross to Lucy Liu. Hi, Lucy. Hi, Lucy.

How are you going? Lucy, where are you today? Oh, she's running in. Oh, Muscle Barrel Brand. Okay, Lucy, give a spin. Give the prize wheel a spin. We'll see if we can win you a cheeky little prize. Oh, Muscle Barrel Brand. Okay, Lucy, give a spin. Give the prize wheel a spin. We'll see if we can win you a cheeky little prize. Oh, Lucy, it's on number 66.

You've won a, oh my God, a microplane. A what? And a microplane. What's that? It's like a little mini cheese grater. And you've won a pair of orthopedic shoes. Congratulations, Lucy Liu. Well done.

How good. And in second place, we have. Oh, we've got Craig Chalmers. Hey, Craig. Hey, Craig. Congratulations. Craig's calling through from Tristletana, which is next door to Tristletan, their neighbouring suburb.

He's given it a spin. Wow, not talking at all. One on him. What does he want? Landing on number. Oh, number three. Great. He's got a pair of Maui gym sunglasses.

Now, they've been used by Jenna's dad, but you know they're wealthy, so they're a nice expensive pair. It's only the richest sweat on them. Oh, God, yeah. It's all avian water sweated out through the rich pores. What else is there? You've won Jenna's Greyhound. Oh!

Shut up! Congratulations. Now, it'll inherit arthritis, right? So you'll have to pay for those bills, sadly. But beautiful dog. Her name's Tigger, right? Her name is Tiger and she doesn't have arthritis. Sorry, Maya. My memo was wrong.

Should we do one more call? Yes, no, we've got someone in third place as well. Okay. We've got Margaret T. Give it a spin, Margie. Margie T. All right. Where are you from, Margie?

Are you from Margie? Oh, she's won Baradine. Okay, okay, Margie's won. Oh, my God. A half-drunk 500ml Sprite. That's not your best work, Mitch. I couldn't think. There's some, Oh, another prize.

What else? Some Hush Puppy slippers. Wow! Congratulations. And she's won half an Akoya candle. Been burnt by Mitchell in his bedroom. He's realised, I don't like the smell. Gave me migraines.

I'm a little witty putty cat. I've never had a migraine. It sounds no good. They're horrendous. Yeah. Flashback to episode six. Going to my brain trauma. Episode six. Remember sounds no good. They're horrendous. Yeah. Flashback to episode six. Going to my brain trauma. Remember when I was talking about my horrendous brain?

Oh. Oh. Is that you? My ears. What is that? Is that recording in? Yes. Oh.

None of us are swearing. Did someone leave something on Kyle and Jackie O's censors desk? Okay, we need to go. What is that? God, I feel like I'm on... Should we harmonise with it? Ready? That's our worst content ever!

One more time. Three, two, one. Hold on. It's a three-part harmony, so already... It's like... No, I start and then you guys join.

Okay. Ready? That sounds so cool. Wow. This is giving me a horrendous headache. We need to get out of here. It's been a great show. Oh, no, we don't have to do an official sign-off, do we?

I feel like this is just the Oscars music, but to a new extreme. Yeah. I'm not playing anything. The podcast world is like, that's enough. Also, this is going to annoy the listeners, so we should probably cut it. It's been a great show. We'll see you next week. Final show of the year.

Yes. Don't forget to leave us a review if you're using the Apple Podcast app. Five stars. Write a little comment. I'd like to know where people have been listening. Exactly. We love it. But also, put something nice as well. Subscribe.

Subscribe. There's one thing. Put something nice as well. Come on. Can you fucking let me finish? Yeah, sorry. Just write something nice because anyone browsing the podcasts if they're looking to find whether it's worth listening

or not and they just say, oh listen, in my truck. It's not really an incentive to listen. Say something nice and real. So please review because it keeps us on the cloud. Feels like I'm giving them homework. This is the rubric. Please review and you'll get your pen license. And follow us on a couple of Mitches on Instagram. I'll put up a Dua Lipa content. You'll get your pen licence. And follow us on Instagram. Add a couple of Mitches on Instagram.

I'll put up my Dua Lipa content. You'll get it in a month. Oh. The victim's died. They're flatlined and now they're dead. All right, we should go. Yeah, we should go. All right, team.

We'll get out of here. We'll see you next time. Thanks so much, mate. Bye. Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app.