Is It Just Me? - #129: Did You Catch The Yawn?

Episode Date: November 14, 2022

In this episode:Did you catch the yawn? Part 2 (06:59)Funerals are SO AWKWARD (11:16)Food during sex (16:34)Cheeky Scams (24:30)Our listening party for Jenna’s new Podcast 2 Girls, 3 Cats’ (36:23)Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (49:41) Hit us up @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. Would you like to try a vape? Why would you take up something that is going to be addictive and expensive? I think for people... I'll tell you why. Yeah. Because you're young and stupid. Some things make more sense than others.

You mentioned that your goal was to be healthier, and I just don't know how you figure that's going to happen when you're ordering a chocolate mousse. No. You know, I had it in the car on the way home and I didn't have a spoon, so I was like an armadillo trying to get ants out of a hole. Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Being fingered is an awful sensation.

Getting fingered by the right person. Goodness me. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of bitches. Hi, it's Jenna. Please don't forget to include my name in the opener this season. I'm sorry. Ta-da!

Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coombs. Hello, you! Well, hello, you. Yeah, hi, you! Turn the music down. Why is it so bloody loud? I'm in a vibe today. I've been in a photo shoot, so I've got makeup on.

Do I look hot? You kind of look like Elton John. Actually, no, you look like Alright Hay. Oh, that's so funny. You know what? Elton John is like an old Alright Hay, really. Actually, in a way, yes. Yeah.

Alright Hay me. Maybe we're like the evolutions of Elton John. Yeah, if they had a kid together. Maybe. I think I'm more fat Elvis if he didn't have that heart attack. Oh, my God. It is strange seeing you in makeup. I know.

It's weird, isn't it? Yeah. She goes, you're very red. Let me colour correct. And I looked in the mirror and I thought, is this appropriation? I don't think I'll ever be able to wrap my head around that, like the colour correcting thing. They're like, oh, so I'm going to smear green paste on your face

and it'll make you look really good. And I'm like, how does that work? I don't understand how the colours combine. I don't get it. It's a real trust the process thing. Because you sit there and they go, eyes up! And your eyes are up. And they go, alright, close your eyes.

And then they kind of go and get more powder. And you catch yourself in the mirror and you look horrific. But you got distrust. Oh, you're halfway through the makeup. Oh, never any good. Can I say, I just discovered facial antiperspirant. I think I've spoken about it on the show before. But for a shoot in front of lights.

What? A facial antiperspirant? I've never heard of that. It's a deodorant for your face. Oh. Yeah, for big boys and big girls out there. Oh, my God. Did you vlog it from the studio?

Did you bring it? Yeah, I took it home with me. Have you got it here with you? No, it's in the car. Oh, for fuck's sake. I know, sorry. I'm a sweaty girl as well. I'll keep you some.

I can do with some of that. What, you want me to Mim's Magic it and squirt it into a Ziploc? Yeah, if you could. And you'd take it home with you? Maybe just send me the link. That might be better. You look good too. You've got a nice Ziploc. Yeah, if you could. And you'd take it home with you. Maybe just send me the link. That might be better. You look good too. You've got a nice little shirt on.

You've got a necklace. This has become a thing I've noticed, pointing out my appearance at the start of episodes. Have I done something different? No, I've just noticed you're looking very good. Thank you. And I think that's what we discussed last week. Of course, last week was the loved up episode. But Mitch has been jabbed with a dick of love.

And you've got that glow about you. I had it. It fades quickly. Do you know what I find funny, though? That sound effect. Yeah. Even though Cupid shooting a bow and arrow wouldn't make that noise, I still know exactly

what it is when I hear it. What is with that sound effect? A little naked baby as well, with his foot up. Sorry, why'd you have to bring a naked baby into it? Yeah, because Taylor Swift sings about it. And Cupid is a naked baby. If anyone knows, Price Cupid, Jenna, welcome. Hello.

Can you just calm down a bit? I'm very amped. You said a lot of things. What do you mean Taylor Swift sings about naked babies? Because all the people look like a beautiful baby. In her new song. Oh, she says sexy baby. Sexy baby.

You're right. She does say that. Sometimes I feel like everybody is a sexy baby. What the fuck does that mean? That's what I thought. Anyway, that's Cupid. How are you, Prize Keeper Jenna? You good?

I'm very well. Thank you. How are you feeling about your listening party we're doing later? Yes, I'm a bit nervous. To celebrate the launch of Jenna's new Catwoman podcast. Yes. Two girls, three cats. We're doing a listening party later and Mitch and I are going to air check it in a way.

Listen, I've hosted listening parties for Lady Gaga, Miley Cyrus, and I can tell you I've never been less excited for one. Have you seen the press that she's done? She's done press. Yes. She does seem to be a lot more emotionally invested in that podcast than ours, but that's okay. Yeah.

That's life. You know, it'll change. That's how I felt originally for this one. It does feel like she doesn't want to be here that bad. Like, I feel like she's handcuffed here. I agree. We're not holding you against your will, Jenna. The restraints will let go at episode 30.

The tracking device on your ankle. Yeah. It went flat years ago. Yeah, we've done you a favour by not getting you the wireless one. She had to be 10 metres within a wall plug at all times previously. That was hard. That was hard. Anyway, if you are yet to check out Two Girls, Three Cats, don't worry.

We'll play you some bits later. I'm sure that'll get you over the line. You'll be a huge fan of that podcast too. And if it is your first time listening, hi, everyone, and welcome to Is It Just Me? Every week we start the show the same way, to idjim, something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Mitch doesn't know mine, I don't know Mitch's.

And that's how the show works every week. We've also, we're bringing back some more petty scams, right? Yes, some cheeky scams. Just little things that people have done to save only a little bit of money. We're not talking like full-on bank robberies or anything. Yeah. Obviously. No, no.

But if you have, that'd be a great story. I would kind of like to hear from someone who's been released from prison after an armed robbery. Imagine if- Be like, what were you thinking? Can we call a prison? I don't think it's that simple, Jenna. We have to be on their approved call list to get through to a prisoner.

I have always wanted to hear, though, this is a call from Morrisfield State Pensionary. Yes, to answer. What is it? You know how it's like something like that? God, that'd be fun. If you're in prison listening, can you please put us on your approved call? There's no way that we have anyone.

Jenna, there'd be no one in prison listening to this. Yeah, but just in case. Maybe some other countries have different laws. There's no 4G in a prison, is there? Yeah, but they could have Wi-Fi. I saw a TikTok from prison the other day, and I thought, how the hell did they do that? So they can do TikTok, but they can't listen to a podcast. Maybe Jenna's right.

If there is one out there, if you're in prison. Okay, maybe I shouldn't shoot down the idea. If you happen to be in prison and you happen to have smuggled a phone and you happen to listen to this podcast, sure, get in touch. Yeah, please do. We'll send you a mug and they'll scan it under an MRI scanner to make sure it's not made of cocaine. We, of course, don't want to, you know, blow your cover.

If you're on a long phone call with us, they might catch you. Just send us a cheeky voice message. That'll do. You don't want to be implicated. Christ, we just want to talk to you. And a selfie of you in your cell to verify that it's real. I don't want fakes coming through being like, yeah, I'm in prison and we fall for it.

Oh, imagine that. Preferably a video because you can Photoshop and stuff. Good point, green screen. Do you think listening to our podcast in prison would get you street cred or that you'd get you hit? What are you listening to? I mean, everyone would want to make friends with the person who's managed to smuggle a cell phone in there because you can have contact with the outside world and organise drug deals

and stuff. iWatch went worth, can you tell? Yeah, true. They put it up their butt. Yeah. Do they? Yeah. The phone?

They call it contraband, don't they? Yeah, they do, contraband. Really? Yeah. God, that new Samsung flip phone would be handy then, wouldn't it? God, imagine if it open flipped inside you. Oh, yuck. Brings a whole new meaning to blackberry.

Okay, let's start the show. Should I go first, Mitchell? I'm very anxious. Sure, you can kick it off if you want. Got to get the energy out. Is it just me, or? Are you the only person in this room that is mentally sane? Oh, don't start.

Yeah. That's a bit rude. I believe I am. Really? And I've got proof. Last week on the show, I was very sleepy. And as we well noted, I yawned multiple times throughout the show. Yeah, you did.

Towards the end of the episode, you were getting real tired and you kept yawning. Yeah, and you wanted to see, Mitch, if people would catch the yawn. Because it's a real thing in real life. If you yawn in a room, and you wanted to see, Mitch, if people would catch the yawn because it's a real thing in real life. If you yawn in a room or if you're with someone, most times, nine times out of ten, a yawn is contagious. Oh my God. My word, didn't they catch the yawn?

Holy shit. Did you get DMs as well? Yeah, to the Couple of Mitches account, to my own. Yeah. So many. I got almost a hundred messages of people saying, I caught the yawn. I literally just got one now. It was in the Facebook group popping off as well.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's crazy. I yawned seven times. Wow. Anyway, this is a nice little message I got from Emily. She's an idiot. And she says, hi, I thought you might find this interesting. You sent me a link.

I clicked the link. It says, if you're in a room and someone yawns and you don't catch the yawn, it is a sign that you are a psychopath. Well, I've heard differently. Oh, really? I got a message from someone that said, if you don't catch the yawn, it might mean that you're lacking empathy. And she said, maybe that is connected to yours and Jenna's antidepressants.

And I said, well, the real tea is that I've weaned off my antidepressants. So it might be true for you, but not true for me. Jenna's excuse is that she is still on antidepressants, I'm assuming. Yes. I am not. And so I don't have that excuse either. Maybe I am a psychopath. Oh, shit.

Because my housemate Jordan said, oh, I was just listening to your podcast. You know the reason that you might not catch someone's yawn is if you don't respect them. I was like, there we have it. I have the answer. Fuck this article. That's cold hard facts. I could like, there we have it. I have the answer. Fuck this article. That's cold hard facts.

I could have told you that. There's so many different explanations. And I'm like, I don't know. Maybe I'm just not receptive to things like that because I'm also not ticklish. I also felt there was pressure in the moment to catch the yawn. Whenever there's pressure, I don't do it. I know. This is the thing, right?

The researchers at the University of Baylor said there are 135 traits of a psychopath and not catching a yawn is one of them. So it doesn't mean that you are a psychopath, but it definitely is in the traits of a psychopath. What are the other signs of being a psychopath? Maybe I am one. Jenna, can you Google the 135 signs of a psychopath? They lack empathy. Contagious yawning.

And I am an empath. I'm very empathetic. Yeah, same. I don't like empathy at all. No, you don't. There and I am an empath. I'm very empathetic. Yeah, same. I don't like empathy at all. No, you don't. It can't be that reason. You are very empathetic as a person. Did you call me pathetic?

No, no, no. I said I am pathetic. Even dogs can catch yawns, this is saying as well. Really? Really? I've never caught one from a dog. I've got some signs of a psychopath. Okay, go. One, superficial charm and charisma. Oh.

What? Yeah. Superficial? Did you just go, oh, superficial charm and charisma. Oh. What? Yeah. Superficial? Did you just go, as if to agree? How dare you? I was sort of thinking myself. I just felt seen. While they lack true empathy, they're often very skilled at faking pro-social behaviours like flattery, kindness and false sympathy.

When do I ever fake kindness? Yes. It's always sincere because it's rare. You know when I'm being kind, it's real. Lies, exaggerations and dishonesty. Oh, my God, it's Mitchell Cherry. I'll take that, yeah. So far it's you.

Not malicious. Lack of accountability and playing the blame game. Oh, Jenna. I don't think you do that. I don't play the blame game. No. I will shift if I can. Need for power, control and dominance.

Let's ring Hayden. Well, we're not talking about Beneath the Sheets, are we? A trail of short, broken relationships. Wow. Oh, Jenna, now you're just reading Mitchell's personal diary. Close that. Close that. Chapter one.

A trail of short, broken relationships. That's good. Wasn't that a Lemony Snicket book? So we may be psychopaths and we may not. The trail of unsuccessful relationships. Harry Potter and the trail of unsuccessful relationships. Okay, I got

that out of my system. Did you have to fucking bring up my trail of short and unsuccessful relationships knowing that my current boyfriend listens? Yeah, but we love Sean. We do love Sean. Yes. All right. Ready for your origin, Mitch?

Yeah, mine's a bit less laughy, so. That's all right. We've got this out of the way. We're going to change the mood right now. Let's go. Is it just me or? A funeral's the most awkward thing ever. Oh, yeah.

I never know what to say, how to behave. I mean, I go because it's the nice thing to do. I went to one yesterday. Yeah. I didn't know the person who died. I was there supporting a friend, but I was just like, I don't know what to say. I'm here being a supportive friend, but what do you even say to them?

I know. Ah, sorry about that. Yeah, I know. It's very awkward, and I just feel there's no right thing to say, like ever. And also the person that is grieving, I don't think they're taking it in. It's a lot. Yeah. Because obviously going, how you've been?

How are you holding up? It's like, don't ask the obvious questions. You know they're going to say, been better. And I feel like you don't want to be asked that. How have you been and all this? Because you've been asked that all day. Yeah, I was thinking if I was in that situation and I was grieving someone I lost and I was like the family, the people were coming up, oh, we better go say hi to Mitchell.

Note to anyone that plans to come to a loved one's funeral of mine, just don't smother me. You know how people think that, oh, we better say hi and pay our respects to the family. I'm like, I just want to leave them alone. Yeah. Because I didn't know half the family members either. I just knew my friend. And I was like, I don't want to go introduce myself to the wife and be like, by the way,

I'm Mitchell. Sorry about your husband. Yeah. But that's also not why you're there. Like you're there for your friend and that's it. Just for that support. I just wanted to say as out of the way as possible. But there was one moment where there were two family members at this funeral yesterday

and they were embracing and just sobbing. And it was like those sorts of sobs where like you're both burying your faces into each other's shoulders and you're like shaking a bit from crying so much. And then one of them looks up, looks at me and goes, I love your videos, by the way. Oh, are you serious? And I was like, thanks, honey. Sorry about your loss. Well, see, there you go. You brought light at someone's time of darkness.

I was like, this is not appropriate for me to be receiving praise. I haven't even met the woman. I will say the best part about a funeral though, is when they say, please stick around for light refreshments. And I'm like, God, when you hear the word refreshments, you know exactly what you're getting, don't you? There is nothing better than a light refreshment. Let me guess. Finger sandwiches. Yeah.

Where they're like little desserts, like little tiny little tarts. Little tarts. Yeah. Orange juice. Some tea. Tea and coffee. I was like, wow, y'all slept on refreshments. I should just start inviting my friends over for refreshments.

Oh my God. Absolutely. Screw a party. Hey guys, come over for a light refreshment. I love that. That's fantastic. I love it. Let's do that if we ever do a live show. Is it, come over for light refreshments. I love that. That's fantastic. I love it.

Let's do that if we ever do a live show. Is it just me live featuring light refreshments? What do you reckon you're going to do for your funeral? Have you thought about it? I don't like thinking about it. It makes me very upset. All I know is that my funeral better be fucking packed. Like everyone better be there. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

I agree. If I've met you once, if I've bumped into you in the street and we had a little giggle, you're there with your mum and dad. I will say this funeral I went to yesterday, they obviously underestimated how cherished the deceased was because the place was packed. I couldn't get inside. There was not one part of me that thought I might need to take sunscreen to a funeral.

But look how burnt my forehead is. I had to stand outside. I've got my hair covering it, but you can see I've got a sunburnt forehead from a funeral of all things. Oh, it's just the strip at the top. I know. You know what I also don't like? When people go, I want my funeral to be a party.

Don't mourn me. There's that new George Ezra song. It's like, throw a party on the day that I die. I'm like, I'm so sorry, but I'd like to mourn. If someone that I love passed away, I would not want to be dancing. I'd be too sad. I reckon I want to do a destination funeral. Oh.

Not unlike a destination wedding. Oh, God. Make everyone fly to Greece or something. That's lovely. Or I just choose something really fucking random, like Dubbo. Everyone's like, why is he having his funeral, his destination funeral in Dubbo? Like, I just want to inconvenience people beyond the grave.

Or, like, I just want my ashes scattered in a really dumb place. And everyone's like, what did this mean to him? Like, why did he want his ashes scattered at the Bathurst Kmart car park? And then everyone just is confused. I just love confusing people, as you know. Even when I'm dead. That's what I want to be doing. Please join us for light refreshments at Baker's Delight Womble Barrel.

They're like, why? Why did he want that? I guess they were his wishes. They're like, why? Why did he want that? I guess they were his wishes. Please welcome the light refreshments at Dreamworld Queensland. What? The wake isn't at the same place as the funeral.

I'm just being an idiot and fucking inconveniencing everyone. I love it. That's great. I don't know what I'd want, truly. I don't know. I don't want to think about it. It makes me sad. You won't be there.

Who cares? Yeah, true. Why are you sad about your own't want to think about it. It makes me sad. You won't be there. Who cares? Yeah, true. Why are you sad about your own death? He is a psychopath. Yeah. Maybe. Apparently my grandfather, who died before I was born, never met him. Apparently he was just so blasé about his own death because everyone knew it was coming

in, like terminal cancer. And they're like, what do you want your coffin to be? And he's like, stick me in the cheapest box. I don't care. I won't be here. Wow. He just didn't give a shit. That's interesting. Now, I get a lot of I don't care. I won't be here. Wow. He just didn't give a shit. That's interesting.

Now, I get a lot of TikToks about mortality. My relationship with mortality is interesting. I think about it a bit. I don't know why. Really? Yeah. Don't you guys? I think about other people dying more than myself.

Really? Like I'm upset about the thought of other people dying, not myself. No, I think about that, of course, too. But no, I spend quite a bit of time thinking about me. Surely that's going to be a sign. I think so. Surely that should be on the psychopath list. Get the list back up.

Is it just me? That's enough of these two. Now let's hear an is it just you? All right, time for your chance to get involved with the show. You can slide into the DMs, couple of inches, for an is it just me. Is it just you? All right, time for your chance to get involved with the show. You can slide into the DMs, couple of Mitches, for an Is it just me? Is it just you? Yeah, really. You came up with it last week too.

It was your idea in the first place. Was it? Yeah. You know I come up with the names and then I just black out and everyone else has to do everything else. I'm very good at coming up with names. You are. Yeah, you are. I pitched a new segment yesterday and you're like, I love it.

Don't even give it away. No, I won't. I do think it's great. Really? Yeah. All right, well there's another segment coming very soon, everybody. That is a brilliant pun. Not today.

Brought to you by Mitch Cherry. No, in a couple of weeks. Did you actually start with the pun and then work from there? It's all I do. I'm not even joking. With all my radio stuff, I do a segment called 90s where it's 90s songs and I'm teasing you with some 90s. It's dumb.

There has been a few times where I've come up with an idea and then be like, Cherry, I need a dumb name. He just has one. Truly. I don't know. It's a bizarre, bizarre trick a few times where I've come up with an idea and then be like, Cherry, I need a dumb name. He just has one. Truly. I don't know. It's a bizarre, bizarre trick to have. Yeah. Very put it in.

All right, let's go. This is Alex Johnson. She's got an idjim. Take it away, Alex. I love how she got the full name today. Yeah, Alex Johnson. Alex Johnson, seven news. She was active yesterday, if you want that.

Yeah, she's been on Facebook since 2007. Hit play, asshole. Okay, sorry. Here's Alex. Is it just me or do you not get the food along with like the sexy vibe thing? Like a man holding a bucket of fudge and it's like dripping down him and he's got muscles and it's like, oh, and people like it. But I don't like it.

I mean, it's not just because I'm gay. Like, even if Jamie Lee Curtis were to hold an ice cream tub and have cherries on her nipples and whipped cream everywhere, like, I'm just not into it. Like, if she came up to me and she was, like, propositioning me, I'd still say, can you go and have a shower first? It just seems gross. Yuck.

Why was Jamie Lee Curtis her benchmark for a hot lesbian? Yeah, I was going to say, is she a lesbian icon or something? I don't even know that Jamie Lee Curtis was. She's not gay. She's straight. She must just be, you know, in her wank bank, Alex. She's hot, Jamie Lee Curtis. I love her.

I'd probably start with Gigi Hadid or something. She's been in this building. No, she's conventionally attractive, Gigi Hadid. True, no, I know. But for a point like that, you'd think you'd use someone conventionally attractive. I don't know. So what, food in the bedroom? I mean, raise your hand if you've done it.

I can't say I have, actually. No. But I'm absolutely not adverse to the idea. Yeah, we've done it very early on when you're having fun. Not we, just for new listeners. Not we've done it. Mitch and I are holding hands. We have done it.

Mitch and I have done it. Mitch and I have partaken. We have done it. You and Hayden have done it. You and Hayden have done it. Mitch and I have partaken. Of course, you've incorporated food, by the way. Whipped cream. And then I think like- Really? Hang on, hang on.

What do you do with it? Put it on a nipple or at the tip of a willy. Is that all? Yeah. Or you can do hot fudge. Hot fudge. Hot chocolate. But licking it off the nipple feels like wasting time.

No, but nipples are fun. They get you going. Like a little bit. But having to wait for the nipple feels like wasting time. No, but nipples are fun. They get you going. Like a little bit, but having to wait for the and then the lick. No, just lick it. True. But then it's like kind of fun for the person doing the licking because it's a sweet treat.

I don't care about the person doing the licking. Maybe someone's got an insulin issue and they need a little bit of blood sugar. They go, pop it on my dick and there you go. Check your blood sugar levels. So you've done hot fudge, you've done whipped cream. What else? I can't remember. We've had, oh, I think we've played with a lot.

A Coles roast chook. Smear that all over him. We've played with leeks. We didn't have a garlic press once. Hayden just had to slam it between his eyes. No. That's it really. But that's early on. We don't do it between his eyes. No. That's it, really. But that's early on.

We don't do it these days. Goodness me. Oh, really? Why not? I think we had a lollipop once, like kissing with a lollipop and then like, oh, we've done ice cubes. Oh, just me. Are you also struggling to picture that, Jenna, kissing with a lollipop?

Yeah, how did he kiss with a lollipop? Guys, my memory is not good at the best of times. No, no, no. I'm just struggling to picture how that works. Because I had a lollipop and then he's like, oh, get coming into it. And then I kiss him back and then he gets the flavour of the lollipop. Then he takes the lollipop. Oh, so it's like pass the pass.

Yes, very much that. Here, babe. Yes. Like a bird regurgitating food for its baby. Like a penguin. Very much like that, yes. We've also given each other oral with an ice cube. Oh.

Yeah, I mean, it's fine. What does it do? It just enhances the sensation. Does it? Really? It's a thing, yeah. Oh, I mean, it's fine. What does it do? It just enhances the sensation. Does it? Really? It's a thing, yeah. Oh, all right. Yeah, it's not for me, really.

Not for you? No, we've discussed this before. I'm not crazy about receiving oral. Let's just get to the main act, you know? I mean, it's nice, but like, yeah, don't spend all night there, Bucko. I know I won't turn my nose up at it. What about you, Jenna? Do you love sucking cock? No. What? I really don't. What about you, Jenna? Do you love sucking cock?

No. What? I really don't. What are you laughing at? I'm being inclusive. No, true, of course. No, I really don't. What sweet treat would get you to suck a cock?

You could put a fruit roll up around Sean's. From so I hear. Maybe two. A whole tape of Hubba Bubba. Maybe two. A nerd rope. A meter Bubba. Maybe two. A nerd rope. A meat and on licorice roll. I always wanted that as a kid and mum was like, you don't like licorice.

On a dick? No! The roll! What was Alex's question? I've no idea. Is she saying like people, like advertisements for food, like putting hot bodies doesn't make the food seem more enticing? Oh, is that what she fucking meant?

Yeah. I didn't think that's what she meant. Maybe hit play again. I'll double check. Yeah, I'm pretty sure it was. Is it just me or do you not get the food along with like the sexy vibe thing? Like a man holding a bucket of fudge and it's like dripping down him and he's got muscles. Oh, there you go.

I assume that she meant like people trying to make food ads look erotic. Doesn't do much for me either. I thought she meant in the bedroom. No, I think she means both, really. I can't think of the last ad that had sex appeal. Yeah. I truly can't. And I also have no interest in like any porn that incorporates food.

But if it's me getting amongst it I'm open to it I remember back in my day when I had a Samsung Z100 Someone bluetoothed me a porn And the man had his dick in a pizza box And I watched it on my That sounds horrible I watched it on my Samsung

With the screen the size of a thumbnail And the penis was the size of her hair And I was like, oh my god And he's like, hello I've got your pizza Oh, let me just check that it's got enough meat And then he opened it and his dick was in it I wrecked

And he had a little pizza hat on And then they fucked That is so not what I was picturing When you said he's got his dick in a pizza box, I thought you meant he was screwing it. And I was like, where does he enter? No! Does this have the box slightly ajar? And I'm like, oh, the cardboard? No. Horrible. What with that little white table thing that goes

in the middle on the head of his dick. Oh my god. So, your answer to your question? No, Alex. I don't think that is the answer. I've blocked it. My answer in summary is that it doesn like get me going seeing pictures or like envisioning people incorporating food, but I'm happy to incorporate it. I'll try anything once.

It might sell as well. Maybe we'll get back to that point with marketing. Yeah, but remember like Tim Tam ads? It was a genie. It was a male genie. Oh, I think I remember that. And he would feed someone Tim Tams. Oh, yeah.

There you go. That's a good example. See, that doesn't do shit for me. I don't care. Yeah, it does nothing for and he would feed someone Tim Tams. Oh, yeah. There you go. That's a good example. See, that doesn't do shit for me. I don't care. Yeah, it does nothing for me either. But the Tim Tams look good. Tim Tams look great. Even like the idea of hot waders and stuff, I don't care.

Like, oh, it's got topless waders. Who gives a shit? Yeah, I don't care. I'm not allowed to touch them. I agree. It's a workplace assault. I'm not allowed to do anything. I don't, gawking at it does nothing.

I just want the food. Same. You know what hooters, now they've got male hooters, they've got men in tight little bike shorts. Oh. Yeah. It's FYI.

Thanks, Alex. If you want a comprehensive analysis of your question, hit us up. A couple of mitches, slide into those DMs. We'll get you on next week. Send us a voice note too.

Any thought you have, don't be afraid. We never ridicule and we never pull apart what you said to us. It's just not our mode. All right. It is time to open the phone lines. Cherry, you ready over there? Yes, I'm very ready. Born to do it. Okay, good. Because you might remember a couple of weeks ago, episode 127, we were talking about cheeky scams. My friend Aislinn came on and admitted that she once scammed her

way into a whole day spent at the movie cinemas. Didn't pay for a ticket. She snuck in. She stole a popcorn box out of the fucking bin and then claimed her free refill. She did not spend a cent and she saw like four movies. And I thought, oh my God, I would not have the guts to get away with that. But we wanted to know other things that people do have the guts to get away with.

Yeah. And they're not big scams. Like, you're not scamming old people out of money. No one's getting hurt. They're little things that no one had noticed and they're not going to send you to prison for. Just harmless little scams is what we want to hear. Let's get into it. All right, we've got Carlos from Bendigo.

Hello, Carlos. Is it Carlos or Carlos? Hi, buddy. Carlos, Carlos. Why would it be Carlos? Isn't that what people Hello, Carlos. Is it Carlos or Carlos? Hi, buddy. Carlos, Carlos. Why would it be Carlos? Isn't that what people say? Carlos. I don't think I've ever heard that. Maybe that's just the accent. Am I appropriating the accent? Anyway, Carlos,

tell us about your cheeky scam, darling. Okay, so we do a few of these, my wife and I. We love these. These make us very happy. It's not even about the money. It's more about the thrill of it all. wife and I. We love these. These make us very happy. It's not even about the money. It's more about the thrill of it all. Yeah, I know what you mean.

It's like you can afford the couple of bucks you're saving, but you just get away with a scam. It's a bit fun. It keeps the relationship fresh, I mean, especially after four years. Exactly, exactly. All right, what is it? Hit us. So, well, the first one was with our wedding,

we had a ton of expensive things. And you guys will experience this. But basically, we bought a few different things. So we had a cake stand and a wishing well. We bought them from Myers. We used them. And then we returned them the very next morning. Now, that's not even really a scam. You're legally allowed to return things.

How do you return a wishing well? Like, wouldn't it have all your shit in it? Yeah. Yeah, you take all the cards with the cash out, and then you just say, oh, we didn't end up using this. And so how much did that save you? I think it was about $200. Anything with a wedding attached to it, they just jack up that price.

I've heard that. I've got a friend getting married at the moment, and she said it's wedding tax. It's actually a thing that exists that she ordered for her wedding cake, right? And it was a ridiculous amount of money. And they had a party the next day and they ordered from the same place a non-wedding cake and it was a quarter of the price. Same with like wedding makeup.

It's double the price of just glam makeup. How long ago did you get married? Are you a newlywed, Carlos? Yeah, we went to get married at the beginning of the pandemic and we got bumped by 12 months. So we're now 18 months in. Aww. How gorgeous. What's your other scam?

I love it. It was too extreme. She's like, we kill people and we sell their organs on the market. No, it feels like this is something they like to do sort of frequently. Have you got any others? Yeah. Uh, yeah. The other one was that, um, my mum gave me a doona cover and, um, it was the wrong size.

So she gave us a super king and we only had a king size bed. So I took it knowing and it was the wrong size. She gave us a super king and we only had a king size bed so I took it knowing that it was the wrong size. So what I did was I went to Spotlight, bought the correct one, switched the packaging and then returned the one in the wrong size and told them it was a factory error. That's so good, Carlos. No, it's not. That sounds like far more effort than it would take to say, hey, mum, did you keep the docket? Why did you go through all that?

It was one phone call, Carlos. That is so good. You know what I've done? You know what came out? And mums always keep the docket, don't they? Oh, my mum loves a docket. And they always call it docket. It's never a receipt.

My mum always apologises for my gift before I finish opening it. She goes, I'm so sorry if you don't like it. I've got the receipt. Don't worry. And I'm like, fucking relax, babe. I'm sure I'll love it. And, like, if I want to you don't like it. I've got the receipt. Don't worry. And I'm like, fucking relax, babe. I'm sure I'll love it. And like if I want to return something, she's like, you have the docket, right?

Because you can't return it without a docket. On the day my mum discovered a gift receipt. Oh, hell, I've changed. It's a receipt that doesn't have the price on it. But you put it in the present and you get the gift receipts in there. So they don't know how much you spent on them. But then it ruins the whole purpose because when you go to return it they go

alright you got ten bucks credit you have to know at one point anyway alright thank you Carlos I appreciate the scams I love it

anyone who's currently engaged take notes you can return your wedding shit after you've used it apparently yeah that's genius Carlos

amen you know what I love I love a good Mentos alright we've got Em in Nauru. I'll have to floss my teeth. Hello, Em. Sorry, Em.

Sorry, sorry. We're saying that right, Em? Yes. Tell us about your cheeky scam. So I have a couple as well that I've been doing. Oh, you've got a lot of them. Yes. The main one is I used to scam Fitbit a few years ago.

Fitbit? Every year or so, I would get a new watch. They're kind of expensive, aren't they? They're like the calorie tracker and they track your steps. Yeah, like $300 each. So I would tell them on their live chat that my Fitbit was broken, like the battery was dying or the touchscreen stopped working. And because they've got really good customer service, I abused that. And they would send me out a free replacement, which I would sell. Genius.

What did you do with all the bloody Fitbits? Sell them? Yeah. Oh, my God. You are amazing. I got like four or five. I racked up like $1,000. See that one?

Oh, my God. That one's teetering off. Maybe too far. Yeah. But I love it. Whatever. I'm not going to dob you in, am I? Well, Mitch, I've done a similar thing because, you know, we get sent PR packs all the time, like just being in the, I don't know,

the media or whatever it is. People send us free shit. I remember once there was an Amazon movie about, I don't know, fitness and I got sent my own Fitbit and I put it on Gumtree and sold it. I got sent a Fireball keg. Oh, I saw that. And I sold it for $300. See, and that's okay, right?

What? I mean, I guess it's okay, but I usually, if I don't want some free shit that's been sent to me, I will gift it to my friends out of the goodness of my heart. I do that too, but I don't want any of my friends to have good cardiovascular fitness. Screw them. What's your other scam, Em? So sort of tying in with the Fitbits.

I used to do big wish hauls and I used to get Fitbit charges and watch bands to go along with the new watch that they would send me. And when everything would arrive, like a month or two later, you would just say that it all has broken and they would refund every single item. Wow. Wait, what are they refunding you for? I missed that bit.

The Fitbit charges that I buy to go with the new watch or just other stuff that I wanted to buy, like $100 hauled and stuff. Oh, my God. You're really targeting this one company. Did they do anything to you? Did you keep one of them? Yeah, well, I'm an Apple Watch girl now.

Fitbit's walked, so Apple Watches can run. Wait, why do I feel like you've got more, Em? She's reading off a list. Any more? Well, it's not really a scam. It's not as bad. But just that, you know, those free HelloFresh boxes, like the coupons you can get. But just, you know, those free HelloFresh boxes. Oh, yeah. Like, those are coupons you can get.

I just make a new email address every time I run out. Oh, we all do that. I've never done that. So, as in, like, a free trial, your first box is free. Yeah, I just made a Firefox Mozilla email account this week. I got about four boxes. And they ended up just blocking my address. Oh.

That's when you start sending them to the office. Yes. Smart. Or if you're close with your neighbour, you go, hey, you want to get in on this scam? I mean, Em lives in Nowra, so they're probably used to armed robbers there, so she can get her over the cheeky scam. As long as there's no weapon involved, all is good.

Compared to the mass crime happening in Nowra, that's nothing. You're an angel, Em. All right, thanks, Em. Thank you. Okie doke, Estelle's up next from Canberra. Hello, Chook. Hello. Hello, hello. Hi. Thank you. Okie doke. Estelle's up next from Canberra. Hello, Chuck. Hi. Hello, hello.

Hi. What's your scam? I wouldn't say it was a scam as such, but, you know, I was not being completely honest, so I sent a message to my local radio station asking when the tickets that I won will arrive for me to collect for a concert that was coming up. And he said, oh, sorry, they don't come in at least one to two weeks before the show, you'll get a phone call.

And then, you know, one to two weeks later, I sent a message going, hey, just checking in, where's my ticket? And they go, sorry, we haven't been in touch. You can collect them between 8.30 and 5.30. And I was so nervous, drove up to the radio station, parked the car. I'm like, they're going to know. They're going to know. So you never won the tickets in the first place, did you?

No, of course not. I just sent them a message. I was being cocky. Who listens to radio? I get it. Careful, Estelle. I was being cocky. I'm like, jeez, I can't get tickets.

I could never get through to win it. So I thought, I'll just be cocky and I'll just send a message. So you turned up? Turned up, go in there and I go, hi, I'm Estelle. Just here to collect my free ticket. And they went, sure, no problem. Because, you know, you have to sign the little book to say that, you know, you've won a prize while I've won.

I'm like, okay, I'll fill out the book. Thank you. Got my two tickets. And then when it came time to go to the concert, my husband's next to me going, we're going to get done. We're going to get done. Like the whole time, as soon as we got through the gates, we were just like, yes.

And no joke, I've saved $250. Oh, I love that. It just ties in with the fact that if you say anything with confidence, people believe you. Hi, I'm here to collect my tickets that I won, but you didn't win shit. What concert, Estelle? It was Cold Ch you. Hi, I'm here to collect my tickets that I won, but you didn't win shit. What concert, Estelle? It was Cold Chisel. Oh, God.

Oh, my God. That is brilliant. This is going back some time. So, you know, it was a few years ago. And, yeah, I'm like, shit, I want to pay $250 for a couple of tickets. Nah, screw that. Listen, I give out tickets for a living. It's in my power to end this.

But you know what? For the good of the people, I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to tell the team. You know what? If you're smart enough to come up with that hack, good on you. And it was amazing. The show was great. And I sent her a message.

I said, we had a wonderful time. Thanks for the free ticket. I wonder what happened to the poor person that actually won them. Yeah. No, there would have been extra. There would have been extra. They do. The way those things work. Yeah. Those people downstairs, they just want to get the tickets out. No, there would have been extra. There would have been extra. They do. They would have been extra. The way those things work, yeah, they just, those people downstairs, they just want to

get the tickets out. They don't want complaints. So you're actually, you're kind of encouraging this hack, Mitchell? I'm not encouraging it, but I can just see how it would happen, and I can see how no one else would have been hurt, Estelle. I don't think you took anyone's tickets, because, I mean, especially a couple... I don't, because I have to have plenty. And how many people actually win and go and actually pick them up?

Yeah, also people forget. Because you've got to drive out to the station to get them, and they're not in, like, you know, an accessible location if you don't have a car. Yeah, good point. They're, like, in the middle of nowhere off the Barton Highway. Yeah, good point. So sorry about that, Estelle.

What the fuck was that? My phone just rang. Thanks, Estelle. We love you. No problem. I'm looking out for my prize, Postkeeper Jenna. Of course.

Of course. See ya. Bye. What a sweetheart. All right, Tara, your last. Tara in Liverpool. Hello. Hi, how are you going?

Yeah, we're really good. Not too bad, doll. What are you doing to save a bit of coin? Yeah. Okay, so I was a uni student for a year and I dropped out, but I kept the concession card and I get discounts everywhere I go.

Oh, my God. Did you keep your student ID? I did the same thing. Oh, really? Yes. I did the same thing. That's why I get student prices at Fitness First. So you look like a child as well.

Are you still doing it, Jenna? Yeah. Oh, because Jenna doesn't age. Wait, so Tara, tell me, what do you use it on? You could do concession train tickets too. Concession train tickets, any student fairs, going to Luna Park, anywhere. Isn't that how happy she is?

I love that. And she kind of sounds youthful, so I think she can get away with it. I got away with it for a few years, but I reckon now I'd have to be a mature age student. My little photo ID card, I look like such a young twink. Wait, hold on. Tara, how old are you actually? I'm actually turning 30 next year.

Oh, shit. And it's working. I love that. I did the exact same thing. So I know where you're coming from. That's funny. And listen, we all here always say drop out of uni. It's the best thing that happened to us.

Do you happy that you dropped out? 100%. Yes. All right, Tara, we love you. Thank you for calling. No worries at all. Of course, if you're at uni and you're enjoying it, you know, no hate against you. Oh, no, of course.

We're so anti-uni. Anyone who's currently about to finish their masters is like, have I been wasting my time? Nah, Darl, if you want to do that, go for it. No, no, no, of course. And if you're a neurosurgeon, don't drop out, please. Oh, God, no. Or a heart surgeon. Some things require a degree.

Talking shit like we do doesn't really. Is it just me? The rude shocks of young adulthood. Okie doke. If you haven't heard the news, our third wheel price keeper, Jenna, is cheating on us with another podcast. She's launched her own. Yep. What's it called, Jenna?

Two girls, three cats. And I feel like this is more of an open relationship. Yeah, well, we never said that we wanted to be in an open relationship. Yeah, we didn't consent, Jenna. We wanted to be strictly monogamous, so quite frankly, get out of our house. Now, explain what this podcast is, because I thought it was a joke, but it's actually real. No, it's real. Yeah,

it's about cats. Okay, and who's your co-host? Samantha Clark. So, have you heard any of it, Mitchell? I've heard none. I've just seen the multiple articles that have been written. Radio Today, Media Week, these massive publications in our industry that Jenna has been featured in genuinely. Yes.

I'm not trying to offend you. I reckon Jenna would have whispered in the right ears to get that to happen. I think she would have meowed in the right ears. She might have flashed her. Yeah, well, we're doing a listening party today because I know you haven't heard it. Some of our listeners might not have heard it. And so let's have a little listening party. And Mitch and I might be able to offer feedback along the way because we are podcasting royalty.

We are. At this point. We are. I mean, our downloads are at the highest ever. I mean, the podcast awards are begging for us to show up. Yeah, exactly. You know what? We could hopefully give you a slice of that, Jenna.

So this is episode one. They did a special about black cats, which obviously caught my attention because my little rescue cat, Isabella, she's a black cat. Yeah, little girl. I'm like, what shit are they going to talk about my girl? So let's just hit play, shall we? This is Jenna's new podcast. Let's do it.

Episode one. Hello and welcome to the newest podcast in town. This is two girls and Three Cats. I am one of your hosts. My name's Sammy and my lovely co-host is Jenna. Now we love cats, don't we Jenna? So much. So much that we decided that we needed to do a podcast about them. There's not enough podcasts about cats. There's not. We had a bit of a deep dive, didn't we? And we couldn't find anything like this. No, I mean, there's podcasts about vet help and all that. Very useful.

But nothing about cat chat. Nothing about cat chat. And look, full disclaimer, neither one of us are vets. No. We are not going to give you advice on how to look after your cats. Absolutely no advice. Because we are, we would be the blind leading the blind. Absolutely.

I mean, we love our cats, but we ourselves still need assistance as well. Andrew, for saying. Let me just pause here for a second. Is there any part of you, Jenna, that's worried that you're going to run out of conversation? No. Because I do absolutely love the enthusiasm. We love cats, so we're doing a podcast about cats, but there might not be that much to say. Oh, no.

We've looked into it. There's a lot. Jenna, I love almond croissants, but I'm not reaching out to the iHeartRadio network to start a limited series. Yeah, well, I have. Jerry's like, I love veganettas, so I'm going to do a podcast about veganettas.

And then two episodes in, you're like, fuck, there's not much to say. Can I just say, it's so weird to hear Jenna actually enthuse to be somewhere. Yeah. Right? Yeah. So who's your co-host? Sam, who's married to Ugly Phil on be somewhere. Yeah. Right? Yeah. So who's your co-host?

Sam, who's married to Ugly Phil on WS. Yeah. No, I thought so. I thought it was her. Isn't it weird that I've run into that woman many times in this place and never once noticed that she has an accent? I've made small talk in the kitchen and never noticed the British accent. Yeah, it does shock me, her accent.

You know what? I will say, just from an air check perspective, that's an industry thing. You listen, you check the audio. That sounded entertaining. Why doesn't she call herself Sammy O? Sammy O! That's where Jackie O got the O from. She was married to Phil O'Neill, and now that he's married to Sammy,

why isn't she Sammy O? That's a good point. Well, she did change it to Sammy X. Where did that fucking X come from? His name's Phil. Phil O'Neill. That's where Jackie O came from. She should be Sammy O.

Let's unpause. Get it? Pause. Yeah, keep going. Let's keep going. So let's talk about our cats. Let's get into that, Jenna. Why don't you talk about your little bundle of love called Connie?

Yes. So I got Connie in around May 2021. She was born in May 2020, so I got her when she was one. She's a rescue cat. Oh, Connie. She is the cutest, sweetest little girl in the whole entire world. I love her so much. So when I got her, she had three kittens. She was only one with three,

the cutest little kittens. She was a teenage mama. Exactly. A teen mom. And she's just so affectionate in every single way. And to be honest, I've never met a cat like her. I get home, she always greets me at the door. She's just so, so loving. And I can't imagine going home and not seeing her. I can't imagine not owning a cat anymore. Is it bad that this whole time I thought Connie was a boy? I had no idea your cat was a girl. Oh, that's a good point. Yeah, Connie, it's a girl's name.

No, it's not. No, Connie's unisex. No, it's not. Connie is a girl's name. Oh, God, okay. Well, your cat clearly takes after her mother being an affectionate pussy. Keep going. Unpause.

And look, it's no coincidence that we're launching this podcast on Halloween because... What does that mean? Well, listen, arsehole. Black cats are, of course, synonymous with Halloween. And there's a negativity around black cats, I find. And to be honest, there shouldn't be. There definitely shouldn't be. I was reading yesterday that black cats actually find it harder to get.

Why does Sammy O's audio sound so much better than yours? You're all echoey. What's the go with that? Tell the text with the podcast studio downstairs, that crappy thing there. Is she doing the show from home? Is she pulling the talent on you? She's going, I have to do the show from home while you do the show from North Ryde. She doesn't talk like that.

No, I don't. You made it sound like Adele. Divorce, babe. Divorce. We do it downstairs together. All right. I actually was very interested in the black cat stuff. So was I.

This did catch my attention. Listen up. I was reading yesterday that black cats actually find it harder to get adopted because they're not as photogenic because it's hard to see shapes, I guess, because it's just like a black. Oh, but they're so beautiful. Black cats are beautiful. Pause.

Yeah, pause here. Yeah. That's very true. They actually told me when I adopted Isabella, they were like, oh, God, black cats are hard to get rid of because people are superstitious. And she's right, Sammy-O. Every time I take a photo of Isabella, I have to crank the shadows up because sometimes you just can't see her.

Really? Yeah. I have to adjust the brightness when I take a photo of a black cat. They're not that photogenic, but they're gorgeous. People are superstitious. You know what? If I were to get a cat, I'd get a black cat of a black cat. They're not that photogenic, but they're gorgeous. People are superstitious. You know what? If I were to get a cat, I'd get a black cat or a Persian cat. When?

No, Jenna, that was to you. Yeah, when? Fuck you both. No, when did I ask? No. Yeah, no, they do go on and say more about the superstitious side of things, I think. I'm sure they do. Yes.

Keep playing. And apparently in Scotland, a black cat arriving at your doorstep actually signals prosperity. And a black cat crossing your path signals good luck in England, which is what I was saying. Oh, I love that. So it wasn't just me thinking that all cats are good luck. Apparently it's a whole thing.

I honestly don't understand how you can correlate black cats with bad luck. That doesn't make sense. A little fact for you. i love facts about black cats is that they can actually change color what how so basically if your cat likes to spend the day sunbathing then the sun can tan it and make it go a little bit oh pause this bullshit j Jenna, you can't be spreading misinformation. It's not. It's true. You're the female Joe Rogan. I'm not Joe Rogan. It is true.

You know what I'd like to hear, Jenna? I'd like to hear you challenge Sammy O on something because everything she says you agree with and go, wow, yeah, that's right. I'd like to hear you say bullshit, bitch, as if cats can change colours, you fuckwit. That can't be true. They're cats.

And that's a fake accent. Hold on, let's hear her point. He's, I suppose, a pure black. Oh, my God, I want to be a black cat. So it's basically like highlights. I love it. And so natural. Yeah, a cat's getting its own highlights.

Oh, my God. Black cats are lucky. Come on. Black cats are great. We are here on the two girls three cats podcast and we approve black cats i want to be a black cat what can i say pause here jenna nate that's a bit risky why black face yeah if you're gonna become a black cat imagine you don't want to be no i don't want to jenna gets cancelled for black fair jenna's going to happen when one of the cats passes?

Are you going to change the name of the show? Oh, my God. Very good point. Yeah, but they're all young. Oh, so you don't think this show will last? Well, how, Mitchell? What a vote of confidence to the iHeart executives that listen to this show every week. Yeah, you should have thought about that.

The name is going to have to be changed. I've just called Sammy O and she's not happy. Hi, Sammy. You're on. Fuck you, you name is going to have to be changed. I've just called Sammy O and she's not happy. Hi, Sammy. You're on. Fuck you, you. I'm really off you. You know what we should change our podcast to?

What? Two boys, three chins. Well, what if I lose weight? Actually, no. We'll never have to worry about that happening. Anyway, yeah, Jenna's podcast, they're very short episodes, I will say. So this is how they wrapped up episode one. Should we come back and do some more episodes?

Can we? How do you think that went? Pretty good. Yeah. I just like talking about cats. I like talking about cats. Should we talk about them again? Let's do it.

Let's do it. I'm allergic to cats. Two girls, three cats. Oh. Yeah, so here's an example of challenging your co-hosts on things. I'd like to challenge you on something. Yes, please do. Oh, I love talking about cats.

That's one thing we have in common, but we never talk about it. Yes. You never bring it up, our love of cats. She saves it for the podcast. Yeah. With everyone else I talk about cats, I've just never thought to bring it up. I didn't even know your cat's gender, Jenna. You two are on a podcast together weekly and you've never discussed your love for cats. Yeah.

Yeah. I've got a cat necklace. I got it from the pet show. The pet show? Yeah. I promoted the podcast at the pet show. I noticed you were influencing. Yeah.

Have you got, have Pet Barn and different people reached out since the launch of- Bondi Vet. Bondi Vet's reached out. He's got a name. No, no, no. Chris Brown will be on later episodes. Oh, wow. of- Bondi Vet. Bondi Vet's reached out. He's got a name. No, no, no. Chris Brown will be on later episodes. Oh, wow. But the current Bondi Vet, Dr. Kate Adams.

Oh, because he's no longer the Bondi Vet. Got it, got it. Well, if you're booking guests, I can think of a very highly regarded and high profile cat lover. Oh, yes. Hello. Wow. We let her infiltrate our podcast, but we're not allowed to infiltrate hers.

Also, I've Googled, Jenna, black cat bad luck, and it says black cats are famous for bad luck because in old wicker days they would eat children. So you're a liar and sorry, but you just spread the only angle that you want people to know. Cats eat children. I made it clear. So do you hide the truth from your audience?

I made it clear we weren't experts and we were just giving our opinion. That is true. Yes. Can't wait for next week when you tell all your listeners to inject ivermectin into their veins instead of getting the COVID vaccine. Yeah, well, that's an opinion, okay? I can't wait to go home and find Isabella in the sun and she's turned mauve. It's not going to happen.

It is going to happen. Is it? All right. Stranger things have happened, i.e. the cat podcast. Don't. Go check it out. Two girls, three cats. Wherever you get your podcasts.

Yes. Yeah. All right. We should go. Let's go. Yeah. I reckon it's time we get out of here. Yeah.

I've got three girls, four cats to listen to on the way home. It's two girls, three cats. Is it? Not if I have my way. Sorry. That sounded like a threat, didn't it? Oh, not that animal stuff again. I more so meant I'll talk to the execs, but I didn't mean hurt the Connie.

I would never. I would never. All right. Thanks for listening, everybody. The Connie. Yeah. The Connie. If you want to get in touch, hit us in the DMs at Couple of Mitches.

If you've got an Is It Just You of your own, we'll feature you on the show. Yeah, and you'll win a prize for that. We like to bribe your way onto the air, of course. Yes, I agree. Do you have prizes over on two girls, three pusses? We will be. What? Catnip.

That's stupid inside. Little cat claws. Little bells on them. That's cute. That is cute. Did you see that Jenna decorated their studio for Halloween? I did! And I'm like, she forgets to bring her laptop here. She's obviously so much

more emotionally invested. Like, she's here to Google shit for us and doesn't bring a laptop. But a podcast, which is audio only, she's got fucking Jack-o'-lantern dangling from the roof, fake spider web. Yeah, I stole them from reception. Jenna will walk to Hot Dollar for that podcast and spend $20 of her own money

yet her four grand laptop won't be walked 10 metres. Do you and Sammy O have a kitty-o? Yeah. That's actually funny because you could make it a kitty-o as well. Because kitty. Meow. Meow, meow. Alright, thanks for listening, idiots. We adore you. We'll see you next week. Thank you. Thank you.

Stay safe. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to AD Deep Reef. This is our secret segment on the end. We pretend that we're done and then we just keep talking shit. Mitch has a hard out today.

Sorry, I didn't mean like he needs to be. That's not what I meant. That's not what I meant. He told us that he has to be done by a certain time and that time is rapidly approaching. So we've got to keep it short and sweet today. How did you know? I know.

I just saw the fucking whipped cream and the bloody hot fudge over on your side of the desk. I'm like, someone's going to big night, man. No, no, no, no. I don't. Ironically, I have a meeting with the Australian Podcast Awards. So excited to announce I'm hosting this year. Woohoo.

Yay. So I could do a La La Land and rig the thing and make us win the big award. Yeah. Why don't you give us a shout out? Hi, I'm Mitchell Cherry from the award winning. I am. I've got jokes written about us. Don't you give us a shout out. Hi, I'm Mitchell Cherry from the award winning. I am. I've got jokes written about us. Don't you worry.

Hang on. I've got a gag. What? Sorry, I'm eating. I'm spitballing. So I've got to do like a 10 minute intro. And I want to do it like a. 10 minutes?

Yeah, I've got to do like a. Well, that's what I'm meeting about. What they want from me. So this is the gag that I'm thinking, right? I'm going to do a 10 minute intro award show style. So I'm going to go. Welcome everybody. You know, Abby Chatfield's here. Everyone claps Abby Chatfield. I'm going to go Abby welcome everybody. You know, Abby Chatfield's here.

Everyone claps Abby Chatfield. I go, Abby Chatfield, of course. It's a lot. And then I'll go, no, nothing to do with the podcast. You're very busy as a friend. Are you okay? You're doing a lot. You know, like gags.

We can workshop that. Of course. You're spitballing. I loved what Amanda Keller said about Abby Chatfield at the radio award. What'd she say? She goes, oh, of course, the most important part of the evening is that Acris trophy. We all want to take home an Acris trophy. Abby Chatfield's trying to find where you put the batteries.

Yes. It was a vibrating joke. That was so well done. That was solid. That was very solid. Written for her. Was it? Yeah.

By who? Don't know. By me. Oh, nah. You're just taking credit. You did not write that. What does Amanda think of your podcast? Well, she got me on the show to talk about it.

On her show? On Joins in Amanda. You're kidding. Yeah, I did a break on it. Really? Her audience don't know how to listen to podcasts. They're all geriatrics. I know, but you know.

They're all in casts. Leg casts, arm casts. They don't want to get involved with a podcast. Have you ever thought about how offensive it is to refer to anyone who gets pregnant over 40 a geriatric pregnancy? I'm like, God, that is so rude. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to the stage, geriatric pregnancy. Geraldine Attrick.

Call her Geri. What jokes are you going to say in your- I'm going to go, Mitchell Coombs is here, and I'm going to hold up a mirror, and everyone will laugh. I don't think I am going. Why? I haven't heard anything about it. I don't think I am going. Why? I haven't heard anything about it. I don't think the invites have been sent.

Right. Am I invited? Like I just said, I don't think the invites have been sent. Well, you've got some pull at the podcast awards for some reason. Yeah, I don't know how that happened. Is there a best editor category or something? Well, Jenna, you should enter that. Fuck off.

Want to hear my Life Uncut joke? I'll go, of course the girls from the number one podcast in the country, Brittany Hockley and Laura Byrne from Life Uncut are here. Round of applause. Life Uncut. Of course I'm part of the Life Uncut family. I host the radio show with the girls on the weekend, the Life Uncut radio show, and I was truly shocked to get the job

with the Life Uncut crew because I'm actually circumcised. That's a good one. Thank you. I knew it was going to be an uncut joke. Yeah. If it was me, Life Uncut, isn't it wonderful? Fun, so yes. Yeah.

Especially because we have different penises. Really? Yeah. Oh, is that what my joke was? Yeah. Thank you for mansplaining that to me. I didn't know that. I'm sorry.

We have different penises. Yeah. So anyway, are you going to get Jenna and I an invite? Yeah. You've got some pull there. Yeah, well, I have a meeting with, ironically, the Australian podcast team.

You told us. That's why I'm asking. I'm not finished. Let me finish with the Australian podcast team in UK. They're in London. You're going to London? Fuck.

The two of you today, it's a Zoom call. But how bizarre that the Australian podcast team are based in London. Okay, now, the problem I'm having is that I asked you a question and then you launched into something and didn't answer it. You didn't let me finish.

Are you going to get us an invite? Yes, because I was finishing my answer. Which was there in London. Okay, great. Now answer my question. With this sass, Jenna, you can come, yes. What do you mean with this sass? Don't know.

I might use my power for evil. Fucking psychopath. We're having one of those days, are we? I'll get invited to the regional podcast awards. You'll be with ABC. Cool and gatter. No, I'll ask for you. Cool and gatter.

I hardly know her. Cool it, gatter. What do you say when your friend gatter's being rude? Hey! Cool it, gatter. Oh, can I bring my friend Julie to lunch? Yeah, sure. Oh, cool, cool.

And Gatter. Oh, that's so stupid. Call and Gatter in the morning. Yeah, call and Gatter. I think I might have to have a sleep apnea machine, guys. What? Yeah, I think I have a sleep study. I think I've have to have a sleep apnea machine, guys. What? Yeah, I think I have a sleep study. I think I've got sleep apnea.

Does that mean you have to wear one of those big monstrous masks that make that really loud noise? No, technology's come very far, but it's a little mask with a little noise now. Oh, lucky Hayden. That sounds sexy as. Potentially, yes. I'll have a digital elephant trunk.

What's wrong with your sleep? Well, I have a constant brain fog. I have shocking headaches. I'll have a digital elephant trunk. What's wrong with your sleep? Well, I have a constant brain fog. I have shocking headaches. I'm always tired, yawning. I mean, that's quite evident to a lot of you. And they think I have severe sleep apnea. They think I'm stopping breathing during sleep. Anyway, so next Thursday night. Oh, is that what that

is? Because I was like, don't you sleep well? You sleep too well that you basically die. Yes. No, essentially, I sleep. I always sleep like nine hours and never feel rested. And essentially, sleep apnea is when you stop breathing throughout the night. I didn't know that. Yeah, it can really hurt you. So, next Thursday night, I've got a full sleep study.

They're putting probes on me and they're testing everything to see if I've got the apnea. How do you fall asleep on cue? I've had one before and it was okay. But people watching you sleep, I couldn't handle that. No, this one's at home. This is the difference, yeah. Oh, so it's all just data. Yeah. There's not some bitch with a clipboard in the corner of your room.

Interesting. Whipped cream. Oh, alright. There's not a box for that. No, no, you go to the clinic, they wire you up, then you drive home in it, and then you press start, then you go to bed, wake up, and drop it off. Oh, so it's kind of like a halter monitor. Yeah.

I had to wear one of those for a bit. Yeah. They're annoying, aren't they? Yeah. I mostly forgot it was there, to be honest. Yeah. Except when I had to piss and I got all tangled. I was like, what the fuck's going on?

That's horrific, isn't it? Yeah. I've had that before. Is it just me on the fly? Do you exclusively sit down to piss? I've never done that in my life. What? No. I in my life. What? No.

I hate standing up. Why? It's so nice. I don't know. I just love a good sit. Any excuse. I just sit on my phone, you know, catch up on emails. I have never in my life sat to wee.

Really? But it's so nice just being on your phone. Jenna, you don't have a choice. What do you mean? Yeah. I reckon she could piss standing up if she tried. I could try. This is how you position it.

Yeah. The split. I feel like I could potentially. Speaking of sitting down though to piss, you know last week we were talking about like how shit it is going to the beach. Yes. And like how you get sand all over you. Yes.

I was like saying, oh, that's enough to deter me from going to the beach. And then on that weekend before the podcast even came out, I'm such a hypocrite. I went to the beach. And then I, later on after I left, I sat down to do a pierce. And then when I stood up to flush, there was just a mountain of sand in the bottom of the toilet. And I was like, how did all that sand get up my crack? It had just been sitting there. And it fell out of you.

God, lucky Sean, that would have been an exfoliated crack. It would have been. Stop Sean. That would have been an exfoliated crack. It would have been. Stop it. It would have been. I was like, how did you go to Lush and get a scrub? You went, no. Haven't been to Lush in years. Remember when you thought I was talking about coffee scrub?

This is way in the early days of the podcast. And you're like, isn't that for your asshole? And I was like, no. It is. I use it before I shave. No, it's for your asshole. I still stand by it. Maybe in Hayden's world. It is. I use it before I shave. No, it's for your arsehole. I still stand by it. Maybe in Hayden's world.

It is. Well, you can also use it for that. Well, you can use any exfoliating product for anything, but it's not for the arsehole. Coffee scups for anything. My new obsession is those under eye gels, the ones that look like a little paisley print that go under your eye, the little gel things. Oh, the one that look like a teardrop. Yeah, they look like a little teardrop.

And they stick on. Yeah, I love them. They're so good. If you put them in the fridge. I never find that they do much. Like I take them off and I'm like, I don't see a difference. Well, I was talking to a beauty therapist and she said, put them in the fridge because then the coldness, they almost like freeze, cools the puffiness right down.

It brings the redness and the puffiness down. I do have one of those eye masks that you put in the fridge, like a blindfold. And I take that out, whack that on, hoping that that'll stop the puffiness. But then I realised I don't have time in my day to sit there and allocate time for de-puffing. And so I got a different one that has eye holes. It's called the hangover mask. And so I just put it on. It looks like Batman with the eye holes.

And it's just like, what do you call it? Like an ice pack that you put on a wound. And it's just one of those. Pop it in the fridge and then I whack it on. Especially good when I'm hungover. That's great. And you can walk around and drive with it even if you wanted to. I haven't needed to because I only wear it when I don't feel like driving.

I'm not up to it. Like sometimes when I'm hungover, I feel like I'm menopausal. I get all hot flushes. So I have to put the mask on. But if I'm just going out that night, I whack it on. It's great. I love that. I want one of those too. I've got a facial roller that has water in it and then you freeze it

and you literally... You know when you did finger paint as a kid and there was that sponge on the roller and you'd like sponge paper? It's that but full of water and then it freezes and you roll your face. It's full of water. That's clever. It's heaven, yeah. It's probably not water. It's probably some sort of poisonous liquid. Jenna, do you want to give it a taste and tell us if it's poisonous or not?

Yeah, Jenna, why don't you cut it open and you give it a sip? Yeah, can you bring it in next week and I'll have a try? Of course, yeah, I'll bring it in. Cool. Yeah, well, that's all of us. I'll have to order one. You'll have to get one. We have a full face one, a full face ice mask.

What do I Google to find this? Well, the full one's a woman. She's a woman. Let me think of it. It's called Colette Dinigan or something. Oh, whatever. I Google to find this? Well, the full one's a woman. She's a woman. Let me think of it. It's called Colette Dinigan or something. Oh, whatever. I'll just find it later. This is very boring.

Freeze facial roller. Yeah, that's the exact one. That looks like my epilator. Yeah. Yeah. It's got little gel balls in it. The thing that you use on your foot. Epi-ped.

Epi-ped? Pet egg. Pet egg. Epi-pen, but with a D. Epi-ped. Sorry, Hayden's had COVID. Have Ied. Epiped? Ped Egg. Ped Egg. Epipen, but with a D. Epiped. Sorry, Hayden's had COVID. Have I spoken about that on the show? Yeah.

And you didn't get it. Didn't get it? Sounds like you had a very intimate week. No, we didn't touch once. And even like 10 days after, he's like, should we kiss again? I'm like, no. It's been three years. No.

I'm like, no. Truly. Imagine not getting it for 10 days and then fucking going at it like rabbits and then, oh, no. Well, we got it after that. Yeah, because it might linger. Totally. So going at it like rabbits and then, oh, no, well, we got it after that. Yeah, because it might linger. Totally. So that's it, really.

Yeah, cool. Cool. And that's that on that. Well said. You watching Drag Race UK? No. Oh, Mitchell. I didn't have it in me to commit to a new series.

We just finished Down Under. You know what? Yeah, I've got Drag Race fatigue. Yeah. They go from show to show to season to season to franchise to franchise. Can I have a little break between? Because as soon as Down Under finished, it was on to the next thing. And I was like, oh, for fuck's sake.

Yeah, it's a lot. It's too much. The British queens are great. Really? Yeah. Like even the NRL finishes and then they have to wait till the next year. Leave them wanting more, Rue. It's an old showbiz rule.

It's a good point. Fuck. You know what? I know Rue Paul's a big listener of Leave them wanting more, Roo. It's an old showbiz rule. It's a good point. Fuck. You know what? I know Roo Paul's a big listener of the show. Hi, Roo. Hi, Roo. Hi, Roo. Sashay away for a bit.

Have a break. We don't need you. Sashay out of my face. All right, shall we go, everybody? If you want. It's up to you. Oh, I'm watching The Watcher. Sorry?

I finished it. You're watching The Watcher? No. Oh, it's great. Isn't it good? It's okay. Oh, I really like it. Can you elaborate on what it is?

It's that new hit phenomenon starring Rose Byrne's husband and Nicole Kidman. On Netflix or something. Naomi Watts on Netflix. Okay. And it's based on a true story. But the true story is a bit different because I knew about the true story before. Of course you did. You sound like you were quite involved.

Well, Mitchell, they still haven't solved the crime. It's true. Otherwise she'd be behind us. This rich family move into a house and they start getting letters going, we're going to kill you. And they'd never find out who the letters are from. Well, I apologise for that. Yes, and I'm surprised they didn't hear that.

It's a lovely house though. It's a gorgeous house. I love the Watcher. Handmaid's Tale, I've stopped halfway through. I can't. Now she's gone. She finally got out of that awful hellhole and she's like, I've got to go back. Oh, no. No, you don't, babe. I can't sit through that anymore. It's too much.

You have to. Do you reckon that's what she says about our podcast to Sammy O? I can't sit through that anymore. I'll help you write a letter. I'm British. I've rarely got to write letters. I'll write you a letter. We'll send it to them right meow.

We'll put pen to paper. No, a rule we have is no cat puns. We'll get that in a whisker. What? Yeah. No cat puns? Yeah. Oh, what a wasted opportunity.

Imagine if Mitch and I said, let's start a podcast, but our rule is no humour. What's the point? I guess yours is informative. No, it's opinion based on cats. Mitch, let's start a cake shop. No baking. Yeah, no cat puns. Really?

Yeah. What a pussy. Yeah, good one. Yeah, that was good. You're really toying the feline. Where did you get that from? It's just on the wall. So why are the episodes, Why are they so short?

Because we released so many Oh how many? Six have been released so far Like one a week? Well first week it was five And then this week it was one Okay So is it weekly or what?

Yes weekly Okay that's how people Get integrated into their routine Yes Good to know Five in one week. Fucking hell. That's a lot.

I'm telling you, you're going to run out of things to say. If you can't even make puns, then what's the point? We'll see. Who's keeping tabbies on that episode, Kat? That was a good one. Ah. Oh, you've got to be kidding me. And Sammy, she's Persian?

And if you need any puns and you can't sphinx of any on the spot, let me know and I can text them straight to your phone. Yeah, if you could. That'd be perfect. And you know what? Let me read over your contract. Because sometimes they get you, these iHeart people, with really intense claws. And I will

iron it out for you. Yeah. Got another one? No. No, we're done. We have to go, everyone. We love you. Look, it's 3.29 and 40 seconds.

I was trying to think of something that related to fur balls, but there's nothing really. There's so many dirty ones that I could make, but I'm like, no, I won't say that about Jenna. Well, that's what they say in the industry. You know, we get blue balls, but cats famously get fur balls. I thought you meant women. We get blue balls, they get fur balls. In the pussy. All right, we get blue balls, but cats famously get fur balls. I thought you meant women.

We get blue balls, they get fur balls. In the pussy. All right, we have to go, everybody. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 3% better today. That's all. So we do. So we do. All right.

Bye, you. See you next week, you. See ya. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app