Is It Just Me? - #14: Celebs With Fake Names

Episode Date: February 9, 2020

Celebs who don't use their real names (06:29)The types of thinkers (14:52)An intervention on Churi (20:16)Lizzo talks the sacrifices of fame (25:02)Our "secret segment" ADDebrief (42:45)Follow us @coupleofmitches!See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. A surge in young people inhaling the gas from cooking canisters known as mains to get high. Some things make more sense than others. I've done everything for you. I've put my career on hold. I could have been anything if I'd had the talent. Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for. This is leadership. I think he's one of the greatest leaders we've ever had. Do you?

Yeah. Well, good, I hope. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Should one of us be Mitch and the other be Mitchell just to make things easier? You're Mitch. I only call you Mitchell when you're being annoying.

You always call me Mitchell. Oh. Now, here's Mitch Choo Julie and Mitchell Coombs. Oh, about time. Oh, welcome back, stranger. Finally returned to the airwaves. Here we are. You feeling refreshed?

No. Not at all? Not really, no. Why not? I just was, I was holidaying and then straight back to work. You had some pretty decent amount of time off, though. Yeah, but I was away. I've not seen you since, like, I think it was December 4th or something.

Jeez, good memory. It's been two months. No, New Year's Eve. We saw you New Year's Eve. Oh, I forget that night. You were wild that night. You were bad. What would you know?

You left at 10pm. Yeah, very true. Anyway, groundskeeper, Jenna's back for 2020. I'm back. Hello. Jenna, how are you? You caught up with Mitch in LA, didn't you? I sure did.

We had lunch. Yes, delicious lunch. Jenna's mum was there. To be rich must be nice. Yeah, right, Jenna. Excuse me. First of all, we didn't eat. Oh, yeah, they didn't, but I ate.

The waiter said, listen here, kid, you told me that it'd be you and the boy. You didn't tell me it'd be more people. Because Jenna was basically sitting on my lap. We were in a two-seater. We were in a two-seater booth in a Cantor's Deli. He said, you've got to get out. And then Jenna's mum sternly spoke up and said, we're fine, we're with them. And he left her alone.

Why have you not inherited that kind of backbone, Jenna? You would never backchat if someone gave you that kind of attitude. No, I wouldn't actually. I'll tell you what, I had a staycation and I'm a different person after it. I'm a changed woman in 2020. Really? Yes. I had to spend lots of time with, well, I didn't have to, but I did'm a changed woman in 2020. Really? Yes. I had to spend lots of time with, well, I didn't have to,

but I did spend a lot of time with my niece and nephew, which is always fun. Yeah. Love them. But here's the thing. They're getting to the age where they can understand what people are saying. My nephew's three this year and he's starting to talk.

And so my sister's like, no, he's always listening. Even though he can barely string a sentence together, he always listening so you can't swear so what you have to alter what you want to say around the kid well i was just like rubbish i don't know he's not always listening fuck that yeah no he's not a google crime and then she was like no seriously he is and then i can't remember what i said but he did repeat it i didn't think i said i didn't swear but i said oh yuck and he goes yeah i was like, oh, okay. He listens to me. I'm glad it wasn't a worse word.

So anyway, long story short is after spending all this time with kids, I've had to untrain myself from swearing. So I barely do anymore. Oh, but you're not going to actively try to not. No, I don't think I need to try. Like the habit's been broken. It takes 21 days to break a habit. It's been two months since then.

So I reckon I could go the whole show without swearing, in fact. Oh, get fucked. Come on, it sounds good. I don't think I've ever heard you say this. No, not at all. Even I'm shocked. Yeah, I know. I can't believe that he mimics what you say.

I just picture your sister, his mum, being like, what's his name? Noah. Noah, time for dinner. He's like, yeah, coming, darling. Yeah, I'm on my way, love. No, he can't quite talk like that. All he managed to say, the only sentence I heard him say while he was home over Christmas, because he figured out that I have an Apple TV.

Oh. You know Bluey? Oh, yeah, dog, dog. That show that all the kids are obsessed with. Noah figured out how to just pick up the remote, walk up to me and say, What? Blue again? Oh.

I'd be like, sure, darling. All right. Go for it, kid. All right, well, we'll see. I'll do this. Jenna and I can do the heavy lifting of the swearing. Although, Jenna, you're not a swearer, so I'm going to have to. Jenna, I've never heard you say the C word either.

Say it. No, hear this. So when I was about 12, I got angry at my mum and I called her a c**t. Oh, Jesus. And my mum kicked me out of the house for the day. Shit. And I was a 12-year-old sitting on the gutter. Jenna.

Was it in summer? Yes. Oh, wow. They don't even let dogs do that. No. That's illegal. That's funny. All right, we've both said it.

Let's see if you can say it by the end of the show. No, I won't. Subconsciously. No, no. Hey right, we've both said it. Let's see if you can say it by the end of the show. No, I won't. Subconsciously. No, no. Hey, we're kicking the show off big. No, that was going to segue to Lizzo, but I don't want to say big. I see where you're going with that. I wasn't going anywhere.

I realised where it could have been perceived as to be going. Yeah, so you caught up with Lizzo during the break, and so we're going to play that out later on. I haven't actually heard it yet. I'll tell you what, it was pretty funny looking at both of our Instagram stories the day that you interviewed Lizzo. Yeah. You were there interviewing one of the world's biggest stars right now

and there I was playing bowling club bingo. Oh, no. In parks. So I'll tell you what, I think one of us is relatable, which is certainly not you. That's my job. But anyway, we're back at work, back in the full swing of things and let me tell you something else that's

coming up later on. I've got a bit of an intervention because you've been sprung doing something in the office. Me? Yes. It wasn't actually me that sprung you. Someone else has dogged you in. Oh, they're the worst things when someone goes hey, we need to talk about Mitch. You're obviously, you work late nights

here at Kiss, the radio station we work for and you're the only one in the office late at night. Like, you're alone. Yeah. But that doesn't mean you can get away with what you're doing, I'll tell you. It's not another thing on camera, is it? No, but you've been sprung.

You've been sprung. Things I've done in this studio. All right, well, that to come. Can't wait. Oh, I can't wait. Believe me. I'm sweating already. Although that's not out of the ordinary. Well, if you're new here, this is something. Can't wait. Oh, I can't wait. Believe me. I'm sweating already. Although that's not out of the ordinary.

Well, if you're new here, this is something we do every show. It's the benchmark of the show. We start the show off the same every week with an Is It Just Me? Or as I like to call them, an idjim. It's something that we've noticed. Something we hate or appreciate. And we put it out there and we pull it to pieces. We both bring one each and we don't know what it's going to be.

It's exactly right. We're both, the first time you hear it is the first time we hear it. there and we pull it to pieces. We both bring one each and we don't know what it's going to be. It's exactly right. We're both, the first time you hear it is the first time we hear it. We're yet to clash. Imagine the day that we come in with the same one. We have the same one. Imagine that. We're not the same. We're very different people, though.

I don't think our brains are thinking. As we've just discovered. You interviewing Liz and me at bingo. Very true. I think you should start. You bring in the numbers and the ratings and people love you. The numbers and the ratings. Same to listen for Mitchell Kearns.

Hardly. Do you want to start us off? Yeah, right. I've got one. Let's love you. The numbers and the ratings. I always seem to listen for Mitchell Kearns. Hardly. Do you want to start us off? Yeah, right. I've got one. Let's do it. First Idjim of 2020. Is it just me or?

Did you have no idea that Elton John's name is not actually Elton John? It's an ugly name, so. Really? It's a good celebrity name because no one else is Elton John, so it's a bit weird. Well, I guess that's true. Jenna, did you have any idea that that's not his real name? I work for WSFM, so yes, I do.

What's his real name? Oh, my God. It's little wonder why he changed it. I actually went to one of his shows recently. He was in Sydney. It was his farewell tour. Yeah. It was one of those things where I was like, well, I have to go because if he dies, I'll regret

not having gone when he was just down the road. So I went along to Elton John and the friend I was with at the time, I can't remember how it came up, but she just mentions, oh, you know that his real name's Reginald. I was like, rubbish. His name is not Reginald. His real name is Reginald

Dwight. Oh no! Would you buy a CD by Reginald Dwight? I don't know. I don't think I would. I don't think Princess Diana would have been friends with a Reginald Dwight. No, probably not. Probably why she went through the tunnel. She realised his name wasn't Elton. Goodbye Reginald Dwight!

That's terrible. But then I thought about it and I was like a lot of the concerts I've gone to in the last year or two have been people with stage names. There have not been many people that use their real name. Yeah. Lady Gaga, for example, obviously isn't her real name. Oh, is that not her real name?

Oh, Jenna, don't be funny. Jenna, please. Look at this beautiful blonde girl. Let's call her Lady. Stupid. No, her real name's Stephanie Germanotta. Stephanie who? Germanotta.

Sounds like a strain of fucking coronavirus. I probably butchered the pronunciation. It's Italian. Oh, of course. She cries about her grandma. I don't know. Okay. No, I knew that, but I didn't know the name.

Well, there's also Katy Perry. That's not her real name. Oh, what's that? Catherine Hudson. Oh, not even Perry. Not even Catherine Perry. No, Perry is complete nonsense. Shit.

Shania Twain. Don't. Don't do this to me. Not her real name. What is it? This one's like the most... What? This one's the most understandable, like why you'd change it.

Yeah. Eileen. Eileen Regina Edwards. No, there's a middle name in there too. And these are just people that I've seen in concert. Like there's so many other people. I did a quick Google after this. I was so curious.

Yeah. A lot of people with stage names. What do you think Bruno Mars' real name is? Oh, I know. What? Something Hernandez. Jenna, just because he's Mexican. It actually is something Hernandez.

What do you think the first name is? Jorge. No. Jesus. No. Could you give the first letter? No. This is an eight man.

Guys, I have a big list to go through. We're not going to fuck around with first letters. Oh, I just swore. Oh! Yay! I'm so sorry, children listening. Well done. Anyway.

Just thought I'd give you one first sound effect of the year. That's fine. Anyway, his name's Peter. Oh. Not good. All right, more, more, more. This is like crack. Rihanna.

Robin. What? Robin Fenty. Rihanna. Robin. What? Robin Fenty. Rihanna's her last name. Oh, that's why her line's called Fenty, the makeup line. Correct. Robin. And then, of course, there's Meghan Markle.

Not her real name. What is it? Meghan's her middle name. Her first name's Rachel. Oh, that's a nice name, the Rachel Markle. Yeah. But the alliteration of Meghan Markle is nice. Yeah.

Basically, all these people that I found on Google, their real names are so incredibly basic. Like, it's people you could work with or go to school with. Like, they're so boring. Reese Witherspoon. What do you think her real name is? Oh, Katie. It's Laura.

Oh! She looks like a Laura, too. She does. Lana Del Rey. Oh, no. Elizabeth. There you go. Jenna's got one there. Where's your bloody tick sound effect now? Oh, sorry. There you go. Jenna's got one there.

Where's your bloody tick sound effect now? Oh, sorry. There you go, Jenna. Okay, if we get it right, we get a tick. I know that pink's, I mean, pretty obvious. Alicia Moore. Is it? There you go.

I don't even put her on the list because everyone knows that, but these are the ones that actually surprised me. I think my tuck shop in primary school was run by an Alicia Moore. I'm not joking. No, I think it might have actually been run by Lorde. What's her real name? Ella. I don't know why I gave you a tick then.

Ella. Can you give, no, let's do it reverse, right? You give us the most basic name and I'll guess what superstar it belongs to. Amanda Rogers. Oh. Amanda Keller. No. Oh, shit.

More, more, more. Do you not want the answer to Amanda Roger? Yeah please He doesn't know how to game show does he? No he doesn't God Grant and you would be rolling in his grave If one of those broken spines claimed him Anyway I mean can we just talk about it for a second

Fool me once shame on you Fool me twice shame on me Don't get back in the race car Grant I know he just keeps breaking his back Just keep about that for a second. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me. Don't get back in the race car, Grant. I know, he just keeps breaking his back. Just keep snapping that spine. I know, it's no good. Sorry, who's Amanda Cartwright? Amanda Rogers is Ellen's wife, Portia de Rossi.

No! Amanda Rogers is such that lesbian from year nine who left. Now, here's a name that I really, I'm not sure I'm even going to be able to pronounce it properly, but Dido, not her real name. Oh, yeah. Her real name is Florian Cloud de Bonneville Armstrong. What? Literally has cloud in there.

Wow. How do you get Dido from that? Yeah, where did that come from? What about Whoopi Goldberg? What do you think her real name is? Oh, that's a shame. I'm sad about that because I like her. I don't know.

Hit me. Karen. No way. Karen Johnson. Karen Johnson. We're so basic. Where did Whoopi come from? Apparently it was some, she literally was alluding to Whoopi Cushions and the fact that

she is quite prone to being a bit gassy. She farts a lot. Apparently. Miss Goldberg. Hit us with the best one to end on. Well, I'm glad you asked, actually, because your mate, who we're going to be hearing from later on, Lizzo. I didn't even ask her that.

It's not really something you ask someone. Hey, is that your real name? Tell me what your real name is, you lying bitch. No, Lizzo's real name. Let me guess. Let me guess. Is Elizabeth? No. Beating. Shit. name is your line bitch no liso's real name let me guess let me guess is elizabeth no beating shit

jenna have a quick guess um um eliza no melissa vivian jefferson imagine that oh this new song this new hot song by melissa vivian jefferson Imagine that. Oh, this new song, this new hot song by Melissa Vivian Jefferson. Jesus. But it makes total sense because I'd never really thought about it, but a name can really make or break whether you're going to be famous or not. For instance, can you actually name me one famous Mitchell?

I have said this my whole life. I'd like to be the first one that I fucking met you. I'm on Studio 10 bi-weekly. But that's hardly famous. You're the most famous Mitchell that is out there. I'm really not. That's not what I was headed with this. I actually can't think of a famous Mitchell. There's Mitchell Pierce, the footballer who fucked the dog.

The Cavoodle. He did it. God, I forgot about that. Yeah, but he sort of melted away into fame. There's a town in Queensland called Mitchell. Yeah, we knew that. There's like over 40 streets in Australia called Mitchell Street. There's a lot of Mitchell Streets. You know what? You're right.

And there's no famous Mitches. The only famous Mitch is Mitch from Modern Family, and that's just a character. Exactly. Would you ever do a stage name? Yes. So I actually have discussed it, and I was this close to changing my name. Me too.

I've thought about it. Really? Yeah. In high school, I wanted to be Asher. Oh. But I know an Asher now. I can't do that. Yeah, I know him too wanted to be Asher. Oh. But I know an Asher now. I can't do that. Yeah, I know him too.

It's a long story. I might say, so you were going to be what, Asher Coombs? No. Asher Keddie? I can't remember what my last name was. I had some really vague first name that could, oh my God, it was like Asher Lee, but L-E-I-G-H. Yeah, that was it for like five minutes, but thank God I didn't do that. That's awful.

Yeah. I wanted to be Mitch Allen because my didn't do that. That's awful. Yeah. I wanted to be Mitch Allen because my middle name is Allen. That's still Mitch. Yeah, but Mitch Allen sounds better than Mitch Turing. There's no famous Mitch's full stop. It doesn't matter the last name. Mitch can be a famous name. It's all about the surname.

If I was Mitch Markson, that's cool. Nah, bullshit. It's all in the first name. Like Shania Twain could not be Eileen Twain. You have to change the first name as well. Eileen Twain. That's good. I first name as well. Eileen Twain. That's good. I've got one as well.

Yeah. Brie Larson. Brie Larson. The woman that you're obsessed with. No, she's an actress. It's Brienne Sidoni Del Soniers. So Brienne. It stems from her real name.

Yes, but Larson. Bet you wanted it to be Brie Benson. It's got a nice ring to it. It does. The rolls off the tongue. Okay. I's got a nice ring to it. It does. The rolls off the tongue. Okay. I think we should get into my Is It Just Me? Second one of the year.

Are we ready? You're right. Hit me with it. Okay. Is it just me or? So I read this over the weekend and I've thought this about myself. Is it just me or? this about myself um is it just me or did you think the only way to consciously think was to have an internal monologue i saw something about this the other day that there's like there's like

two type of thinkers well there's apparently quite a few and i want to see what we all are so there are type a which is the majority which is people who think in an internal monologue. So you watch a movie and someone is killing someone, right? In their head, they're playing the dialogue. They're going, I shouldn't be doing this. Oh, my God. How am I going to bury the body? That's how I think.

Not about axe killers. Right. But I think right now when I'm thinking about what I'm doing next with the sound effects, a Mitchell in my head is going, all right, have this, this, this, this, this, this. Other people see pictures and images and numbers. They don't hear a voice. They just see it. And people see pictures and images and numbers. They don't hear a voice. They just see it, and that's apparently how it comes across. So don't tell me.

I want to set it up. I've matched music to how I assume you all think, and I'm like you. I'm going to give you a topic, and I'd like you to just think about it, but think out loud. That says what type of thinker you are, that you've matched music to it. How very abstract of you. Well, I'm going to go into Mitch Coombs' mind, okay?

Okay. Just close your eyes, Mitch. Welcome aboard. And I'm going to give you a topic, and you are going to just think about it. It's very mundane, and this will show me how you think, okay? So, Mitchell Coombs, going into his mind. And to Mitchell Coombs' brain.

What's going on in there? It's me. Sounds like a gay nightclub. We're back to the yoga. He's home. Oh, my God. Jesus. Is that what that music was representing?

Yoga. Your brain. Yeah, this is yoga and karma. Oh, because I was thinking about my Pilates class yesterday. That's really weird that you did that. Okay, let's do that. Ready? You're at home.

You have a Pilates class in 20 minutes. Yeah. And you're just getting ready. So go for it. How do you think? I could get ready now or I could get ready in 10 minutes and walk fast. Which way do I want to do? Do I want to show up to a yoga class all frazzled

and stressed and like short of breath because I walked really fast or do I want to show up a bit early and be at ease, you know? Case in point proven. You think out loud. Yeah, but it's not at that pace that I would do it in a normal voice. Like it's like way quicker than that. But do you hear yourself?

Sometimes. Sometimes I think to myself you're fucking joking Coombs, what is that? Me too. I think to myself, you're fucking joking, Coombs. What is that? Me too. I think that often. Jenna, I've got music for you too. All right, so we're going into Jenna's brain. Let's go.

Just cracking it open. What is this? What is this? An absolutely atrocious MP3 of the McLeod Daughters theme song. Why is there such bad quality in Jenna's brain? Yeah, Jenna, what's your memory of this from? Why does your brain feel like it's functioning off a broken aux cord? You know when you unplug it halfway and it sounds like it's karaoke?

Yes. Jenna, how do you think? So your scenario is you have to feed Sylvia, but you're out of food. So how do you think? Go for it. I'll give you the brain music too to make it easier. Oh, no. Sometimes I think, why did Mitch give me Sylvia?

But then I think again, you know, I'm truly blessed to have her. And I just need to find food for her. What do I do? Okay, I'll just walk to Coles. Oh, but it's getting late. Do I let her starve for the night? Or she might be fine. Jenna, you don't think about killing your fish.

Jenna just has some really ultra dark shit thrown in there. Or I could just set myself on fire. Oh, it's a total fire ban. Doesn't that blow you away that other people don't think like we do? Yeah. But when you're lying in bed and you're thinking of your day, can you go back and picture what happened? It's like you're watching a movie of the day.

Yeah, but, for example, I don't go back and I don't hear my own voice retelling it where it's like, oh, remember that time that Mitch Cherry was, like, really annoying and said this? I would repeat your voice in my head saying what you said. Oh. So do you retell the story repeat your voice in my head saying what you said. Oh. So do you retell the story in your voice? You would, you narcissist. No.

Oh, coming up in the next 20. You never believe what happened earlier. Oh, let's reflect on that. I hook my own memory. Coming up in 10, I'm going to cry about the death of my granddad. Right now. We're watching Netflix. Is it just me?

Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. Well, that was a tragic is it just me? I thought we were going to get somewhere. I'm going. What? Sorry. I've got Zumba. Oh, are you leaving?

Yeah. You don't have to announce it. You could just leave and then we just pretend that you just never left. We wouldn't talk to you. It's all right then. Oh, she's actually getting up out of her chair. Thanks, Jenna. Have fun at Zumba.

See ya. Is there really only one class a week? At this time, yes. That's fine. Now we know where your lawyer lives. All right. See ya, Jenna. Bye.

Get out. Get out of here. Okay. Bye. Bye. She's still got the headphones on, Jenna. If you're going to leave, go. She's such a self-sabotager.

She's taking up. She is taking up all this time. Shut up. Oh, for God's Jenna. If you're going to leave, go. She's such a self-sabotager. She's taking up, she is taking up all this time. Shut up. Oh, for God's sake. Are you going or not? I'm putting my shoes on. Oh, okay. TikTok bitch.

I'm very confused. All right, Jenna. Well, we're not going to wait around all day for you to put your shoes on. Let's move on. Intervention time. I mentioned that you've been sprung doing something in the office. Yeah. Right.

So you're the last person in the office every night, right? I am, yeah. I finish at midnight. And then the first person in the Kiss studio the next day is Shivering Adam. Adam Price, yes. He does 5am until Kyle and Jackie O come on. Yeah, close friend of the show. And so he has to come into the studio the way you left it.

Oh, it doesn't smell, does it? Well, he has alerted me to a bit of a problem that's been happening. I feel sick, seriously. And the state that you leave the studio in. No, that's not fair because I clean it because I know Kyle is in here. You can't, you mustn't because he's been bringing me the things that he finds that you've left behind. Like what? Well, we're about to go through them, my friend.

Oh, no, don't do this. Okay. Why am I always the punching bag on the show? I just want you to cast your memory back, which I know you're not good at. I can barely remember how we started the show. Well, think back to the last show of last year. So show 13, you were trying to encourage us to do New Year's resolutions. And you mentioned to me that you wanted to lose weight, join a gym and start being healthy, right?

Yeah. join a gym and start being healthy right yeah okay so what adam's been bringing me is the garbage that you leave behind in the studio every night after you're done packets of chips no uber eats bags receipts from menu log okay every morning he goes another one mitch and then i add them to the collection and now here we are so here's your your little snitch. Yep. I trusted him. With your trash. I just assumed he wouldn't go through it. Now, look, I'm not about fat shaming. Yeah, this is.

Like, I don't care what anyone else does. Their health and fitness is their business. I don't judge at all. But I just know that you mentioned that your goal was to be healthy and I just don't know how you figure that's going to happen when you're ordering a large, cheesy crust load. No, no, no, that's not. And a chocolate mousse.

No. No. In one order. No, that was in one order, but I bought it because I wanted to eat it when I got home. Tomato relish chip dip, Pepsi Max, zucchini chips to share. With who? I get hungry at about nine and then ten again. Ah, yep. Fresh pressed juice for health. Yep. Yep who? I get hungry at about nine and then ten again. Ah, yep.

Fresh pressed juice for health. Yep. Yep. I know you're all about that. Pork crackling roll. Oh, that was good. Chicken rice paper. A lot of things.

What, for the love of God, is money bags? Oh, they're a Thai delicacy. They're a little pastry and they've got mince wrapped in them and they put a little honey sauce in them. Jeez, you really do have a type, don't you? You love your Asian cuisine and your Asian boyfriend. I've got a taste for it. This is hundreds of dollars worth of stuff.

This is unfair. Everyone gets Uber Eats, and if you added up everyone's orders, it'd sound ludicrous. These are weeks apart. No, no, no. What I'm saying, like I said, I'm not judging. I don't care what you eat, or I don't care what anyone eats. Like, if they're happy, whatever. If anything, I find it kind of adorable that you care so little about your health.

You just thought one night here by yourself, you know what I need? A choccy mousse. I'm just picturing you scrolling through the menu being like, yeah, I deserve that one. I'm going to have that. I had it in the car on the way home and I didn't have a spoon. So I was like an armadillo trying to get ants out of a hole. No, it's not even that I'm lazy. You know what it is? It's that I have joined a gym. No, it's not even that I'm lazy. You know what it is?

It's that I have joined a gym. I've joined an anytime fitness. You can go anytime. And I haven't been one time. Yeah, I haven't been once. Oh, so you remember you're paying for it. Paying, yeah, a lot of money too. Gee, you really are moneybags, Cheery, in every sense of the word.

So you know it at any time. You're even paying for it. So that's an incentive to go, why haven't you gone? What are you worried about? There's nothing going wrong. I go to the gym, right, and I know how to use the treadmill

and then I can use the rower and then that's sort of where sort of my expertise stops. Like I don't really know all the metal and there's a stair machine and then there's some sort of climber and then there's a bar that people are flipping on

and I just don't know how to do any of those. Is that what you're worried about? Because I feel like you're one of those people that's like, I'm not going to do it unless I give it 110%. Or like, I'm not going to do it unless I do it properly. Are you worried that you, because you do ease into it. Like you could go for a frigging 10 minute walk and that counts as going to the gym. I walk

but the thing is, I don't. I walk. I walk. I wasn't accusing you of being constantly stationary. I know that you're being self-deprecating but all that aside is it actually a goal to go to the gym and get healthy this year? Because if it's not

who cares? No, it's not. I couldn't give a shit. Good for you. I'm happy. Good for you. I'm having fun. I've got a number one rating podcast and a radio show that no one listens to lifestyle. I think you got it the wrong way around.

You should follow these idiots online. Search couple of Mitches. You're listening to Is It Just Me? All right, nearly time for us to get out of here. But before we do, I really want to hear your chat with Lizzo that you did over the break. Oh, yeah, this is genuine. I had actually one of the best interviews I've had in a long time with her. That came up out of the blue.

Chat was really good. She was lovely. Well, I haven't heard it yet because I don't know why. You don't even have a podcast for your radio show, do you? No, I don't. I don't want to put my content on. I could just put the chats on, I guess. Well, yeah, I don't want to hear you back announce and say 10 past 9 again.

David, get up. No, I don't need to hear you. I don't need to hear all that shit. Okay, fair enough. You should put your interviews up, though, because, like, it's 2020, honey. It's on demand. I'm not going to go to my car at 11.40 to hear your Libo interview. You make a good point. I think not going to go to my car at 11.40 to hear your Lizzo interview. You make a good point.

I think you'll like the chat. You'll hear it when I play it, but this interview started off rocky, and I thought, oh, no, this is another Dua Lipa situation. Really? No North Korea jokes. But she was just low on blood sugar. We talk about salads and what she wanted to eat, and then we really got through the food stuff.

She was rolling. She was happy. So for anyone who doesn't know Lizzo, what's like a song, obviously five-second rule for podcast copyright, what's like a song, obviously, five second rule for podcast copyright. Oh, I can get one. What's a song of hers that everyone would know? This one, Juice, my favourite.

Sorry, I had to stop it. I wouldn't have picked that as a song that everyone knows. Do you know Good As Hell? Of course. I do my hair tall. I check my nails. Baby, how you feeling? That's not what the lyrics are.

What are they? Oh, I don't know. Yeah. I do my hair tall. Check my nails. My hair toss. No, it's not. Thank you, Jenna.

I was really worried that I had gotten it wrong. I do my hair tall. No, it's, yeah, I do my hair toss. Check my nails. Ready? I'm going to do a hair toss and check my nails and you tell me how sassy I look. Ready? Okay, go.

That was phenomenal. That is the mood that she's trying to describe. Yeah, I got the vibe. I do my hair tall, check my nails. It's meant to be really sassy. I genuinely thought it was I do my hair tall. I guess Elvis is wise. Like she's Marge Simpson.

Maybe that's because I do my hair tall and I could relate. Well, here's my chat with Lizzo. Let's roll it out. I really want to hear it. Let's go. Hello. Lizzo, how are you? I'm relate. Well, here's my chat with Lizzo. Let's roll it out. Yeah, I really want to hear it. Let's go. Hello. Lizzo, how are you?

I'm fat. My blood sugar's low, but I'm fabulous. Sorry. Did she just say, I'm fat, in answer to how she is? Okay, there's no need to make those kind of jokes, but I actually think I heard it too. Did she say, how are you, Lizzo? And she goes, I'm fat. No, she says, I'm fab.

Hold on, I'll start that again. Go again. Hello. Lizzo, how are you? I'm fat. My mum, that's fab. Hold on. I'll start that again. Go again. Hello. Lizzo, how are you? I'm fat. That's fat. Jenna. Sorry.

I mean, if that's how she wants to identify, then who am I to argue? Keep going. Hold on. Let me isolate it. Stop. I'm trying to isolate it. I'm fat. She definitely lives a T.

She does. Sorry to interrupt. Everyone keep going. This is disrespectful. Lizzo's listening. All we've ascertained is that she's fat. Keep going. That's not actually funny.

After all this body-wise measuring thing. No, that's what I'm saying. If that's how she wants to identify, then who am I to stop her? All power to her. Fabulous. Hello. Lizzo, how are you? I'm fab. My blood sugar's low, but I'm fabulous.

Okay, I'll make it quick. I'm just kidding. I'm just kidding. I'll make it quick. At least you're honest. What are you going to have for lunch in Australia? Do you know? I'm going to have a salad. Okay. You guys At least you're honest What are you gonna have for lunch In Australia do you know I'm gonna have a salad

Okay You guys have really good salads here I've noticed Yeah You put beets And sweet potatoes Yeah In your salads

And like the salad dressing Isn't like Like in America You can get like All these creamy Cheesy Blue cheese Salad dressings

But here You guys use Like really nice Vinaigrettes Yeah we do That are barely detectable But really flavorful yeah so I've just been having a fucking crack us on kids you can do it if you have it a fucking blast yeah well I'm glad eat some veg yeah get some beetroots are good and some walnuts and

some chicken why not yeah we're up till midnight so the show is Mitch till midnight 12 so you can swear you can say whatever you want you can create anything fucking fine I'm good fuck I don't say I don't swear I'm on my own so the show is midge till midnight. Oh, sick. So we're here till 12, so you can swear, you can say whatever you want. You can do anything. Fucking fine. I'm good. Fuck. I don't swear. I'm on my own, so I don't ever get to swear. So we'll say it together.

Fuck. Oh, God. I'm going to lose my job. It's so good to have you here. I was at the opera house, the Liz Opera House. Why are you laughing at me? That's fun. Can you just hit play?

But Jenna's laughing at me. What an insecure little bitch. Isn't this what you do? You're so rude. You're so rude. You're so rude to make people laugh. Very true. But Jenna's laughing at me. What an insecure little bitch. Isn't this what you do? You're a dog boy to make people laugh? Very true. But Jenna was laughing at me. No, I was not.

I was laughing at the content. Okay, fair enough. Anyway, we are interrupting this a lot. I'm so sorry. Yeah, so here we go. I'm going to cut your mics off. Liz Opera House, is that what you said? Yeah. Do you like that?

I like it. Yeah, Liz Opera House. Yeah, no, that's good. Rolls off the tongue. I was there. Really doesn't. And I i have to say genuinely i people always ask working in radio and in the media who's your favorite you have a favorite artist and i never had an answer i just sort of give them an answer to make them happy or say ari or someone that was hot or harry styles but genuinely i love both of them i know right and they're good but they're, they didn't connect to me or speak to me in a way that you did

at the Opera House and you do through your music. You are incredible. And the performance was something that I've never experienced before. Thank you. It was religious. Like I was, I think I started the bow. You know, people were bowing towards you. I think I started that.

I was in the middle. I'm like, bow to Lizzo. Bow down to Lizzo. All these kids were like, okay. Made them do it. You felt so humbled and it seemed that you were loving it. Was that a bucket list moment? It was.

I had an interview a few months earlier, like over the summer in the States, about this trip. And she was like, you know, what are you playing? I'm like, I'm playing FOMO. And I was like, I what are you playing i'm like i'm playing fomo and i was like i want to see this in the opera house it's my dream to play there as like a young flutist growing up and i was like yeah one of these days i'll be in those hallowed halls and then we booked the gig the side show and that blew my mind i was like did i manifest this as some type of magic and here we are like i i am yeah did you say bucket list because shit

yeah the acoustics were perfect for oh my god it's the opera house it was perfect for everything i even got to hit some ave maria in there i know i didn't know that was great it happened so quickly too like when i was done i was sitting there like wow now we have to be like remember when we played the sydney opera house yeah can i just stay for a little bit it's over now yeah well you sort of And I was sitting there like, wow, now we have to be like, remember when we played the Sydney Opera House? Yeah. Can I just stay for a little bit more? It's over now. Yeah.

Well, you sort of, it ended and you were like, I'm going to just play the flute. I've already done Juice, but we'll do it again. Yeah. Yeah. That was a really cool moment because that wasn't supposed to happen. Was that really not supposed to happen? I forced it, yeah. Really?

Yeah, I was back there and I just told my sister. Bring me the flute. Yeah, I was like, we're doing this now. So, yeah. It was incredible. It was a great night. Thank you. I mean, you cut yourself too at the start of the night. I was like, we're doing this now. So, yeah. It was incredible. It was a great night. Thank you. I mean, you cut yourself, too, at the start of the night.

I did. Look at that. Oh, that's a decent cut. It's decent. I was bleeding all over myself. You were dancing too hard. I was dancing and, like, I had these diamonds on my bodysuit, and I was pulling at them, and one thing led to another.

Well, you were ripping your tights by the end of it. Oh, you saw that? Yeah, it was great. That's performance art. It was intentional. Was it really? You, like, cut them before the show so they get more of it. Oh, you saw that? Yeah, it was great. That's performance art. It was intentional. Was it really? You like cut them before the show so they get more and more. Yeah, just a tiny thread.

Yeah. So here for FOMO, do you like the crowds? Are the Aussie crowds different to crowds in the US? You know they are. They're so interesting. But also the cities are vastly different. Like Adelaide is different than Brisbane, like energy wise, like completely. And they're both fun.

But I'll say the universal thing with you guys is I'll look at y'all and, you know, I'll tell y'all to sing and y'all just fucking scream. It's so weird. No, but I'll be like, say, I feel like water. You're like, ah! That's what you're, I don't be like, wait, don't sing. I don't. And you're just like, ah! I don't know why y'all do that.

We don't listen. It's so weird. That's an Aussie thing. We're just so in the show. Yeah, I have to stop telling you guys what to do. I just have to, like, hope that you know the song. Yeah, I think we're just so into it. I mean, we love it.

Yeah, you're screamers. We don't get the big artists, you know. I mean, having Lizzo here, everyone's excited. So I think everyone just goes, just scream at her, and hopefully she. Yeah, you're screamers. We don't get the big artists, you know? I mean, having Lizzo here, everyone's excited. So I think everyone just goes, just scream at her, and hopefully she enjoys that, you know? It was announced yesterday, Grammys, you're performing. Yeah. What the hell?

I know, what the fuck? Like, I mean, bucket list item, again, that surely was on the list. Oh, and then some. Like, I'm going to turn that into like a bucket within a bucket within a bucket. Yeah, you're going to kick the bucket. The bucket's done now. I'm not kicking the bucket, I'll tell you that much. Don't kick the bucket.

Yeah, actually, no. Lizzo's not. I'm stacking the bucket and I'm adding all of the, because like the Grammys is such a big deal. And then I'm like, well, if I'm doing this big deal, what else is a big deal to me? What have I always wanted to do? The Grammy stage is the stage to do that on.

How was, I was actually in the States and we don't get Saturday night live here because of the time difference. So the first time I ever got to watch Saturday night live live, I turned it on and there you are. That's wild. How was that? Was that a crazy night? I was so sick with the flu.

I was bedridden with like a 103 fever. Really? So I was on tons of drugs. It was to the point where I was so lethargic. I wanted to be. This is my dream. SNL is

a dream come true. It really is. It's a special place. My outfits were so cute and my dancers were so cute. It was all perfect. I just was just high on codeine. That's the only thing. On NyQuil.

It was like, well, yeah, but like Eddie Murphy was there with all these great comedians. My mom was freaking out. Was your mom there? Kanye was there

and yeah, my mommy and my sister. Yeah. It was a big deal. I think you can host it. Yeah. Would you, I mean, you could deal. I think you can host it. Yeah. Would you, I mean,

you could act. Of course you can act. Oh, I was, I was in a potentially Academy Award nominated film. Right,

of course. It's on the shortlist. Holy shit. Isn't that crazy? How does that happen? How do they get the shortlist? What the fuck is that? It's crazy.

Hold on, hold on. So, is there a real shortlist? Yeah. And they just send it to you? Well, no, no, it was on the internet. It was announced. It was listed. This is crazy. Hold on, hold on. So is there a real short list? Yeah. And they just send it to you? Well, no, no, it was on the internet.

It was announced. It was listed. No, yeah. Public knowledge. All right. It's on Twitter or whatever. Do you think like. If it's nominated, that would be crazy. You'll get to go to the Oscars.

Well, I hope so. You'll go to the Oscars. You're Lizzo. You're in the opera house. You'll go to the Oscars. Even if I sneak in, I'll sneak in through the back door. Yeah, you'll have to the Oscars even if I sneak in I'll sneak in through the back door far out

wow alright God there's so much to cover do you feel good are you happy yeah but you know

I don't always have to be happy all the time true and that's something that I've come to terms with and I actually like about myself yeah that I don't

have to just be happy for everybody that me actually experiencing my emotions is what makes more of a difference than trying to mask them true especially right now we're like you know you got like your celebrities on the internet like they always want to seem like they're happy and they got their shit together and things are perfect. And it's pressure for me sometimes. I'm like, well, I have nothing to complain about. Like, everything's great. But it's like, no, you know, you never know what somebody is going through.

Like, we all have mental and emotional highs and lows and where we should be allowed to have them. So I had to really get rid of some guilt for that. Because when I first started touring the Cause I Love You tour last year I was pretty depressed because it was a lot of interesting things happening like the the being like a successful musician and being a famous musician are two different things you know you can be extremely famous and not have any of the things that you perceive as of success you know and um you can have success and not have any of the things that you perceive as of success you know and um you can have success and not have any fame and once I started becoming a little bit more well-known it you lose a lot you lose a lot of privacy and you lose a lot of what you like your sense of who

you thought you were because you have to become this new person you know so I was really depressed about that but now I'm leaning into it and I think that it's cute and you know I just need to be prepared yeah always be prepared you can't I can't be caught slipping out here now in these streets you I mean it suits you well I mean especially in Australia like there's so many people at the airports yeah that doesn't happen to me in the states like here y'all be like oh my god like when I land and I'm like oh well I gotta look cute gotta put some lipstick on now yeah because i was jacket on i was looking real toe up from the floor really when i landed here yeah it's not fun which oh no i mean when i when i was flying from australia city to australian city yeah i flew i looked like shit when i flew from adelaide to

sydney i looked like shit and all these people was like i was like i smell like yeah yeah because i rolled out of bed and didn't put no deodorant on like where is she now yeah but so i learned my lesson real quick yeah well we love you um and we love you even more after what you did it was it a food you were helping pack food for some oh your victims? Oh, yeah. The Food Bank Victoria. Yeah. Did you just, was that something that you had a free day or did you cancel stuff?

Um, I had a show that night, but, um, I, since I've been here, I've, I mean,

I'm not really posting on social media, but, um, I've just tried to be as informed and as active as I can in this country. And so I visited the koala sanctuary.

I about said koala reservation. It's the same. I visited the koala sanctuary and then learned a little bit more about the koalas, especially because of what the fires are doing to the koala and kangaroo and all the other wildlife populations. And then we visited the food bank, which was really special. Like I really admire the people who do this.

They feed like, they feed families for a week. They feed like 2000 families a day. Like they're just packing boxes and shipping them out. And they're, they're just, they're taking food out to the firefighters. And these people are just volunteering there. They're with their little, they got their orange vests on just back there packing milk. And that

takes a lot. I mean, it takes a really special person to be able to do it. And there was children, you know, and elderly people just all helping. And that was so inspiring. And then we got to go see the botanical gardens. And there was like a tree that had fallen during all of that. And she was like, it's just climate change. Like that's what happened to this tree, this 200-year-old tree. And they were like, and after the wildfires are, once we fought them, they have these seeds where they're going to try to replenish the wildlife. Like it's just so cool to see how much this country pulls together. Yeah.

Well, that's the Australian spirit of like the Aussies band together. And I think that's also why your music and you as a person resonates with us, because we're no bullshit. Like we just, we just trim the fat. We just see it as it is. We say it like it is. And you do that and you spread so much positivity and love and i just want to say thank you playing your music on the radio

like people request it kids request it kids call up and that's so cool juice play juice that's so cool i'm like okay is your mom in the car right can i can i legally have to ask for permission i love you thank you for everything you do oh man it's the least i could do like to put a smile on somebody's face i almost felt guilty about coming here and just playing shows i'm like i can't just come here and be like like i have to you know help so then when and then when people say no just you being here helps and you playing music i was like oh really yeah it's not enough in my eyes but it's definitely if the if that's what they want, I'm going to fucking, I'm going to do it.

Yeah. Full throttle. We love you. Good luck at the Grammys. Thank you. And good luck at the Oscars. Like, you're going to win. You're going to be there.

Yeah, tell that to J-Lo and all them people, Constance Wu and them. Yeah. Hashtag Lizzo Oscars 2021. You'll host it. I'm just manifesting that. Thank you. This is the end of the interview? Yeah.

Oh, wow. I'm getting wrapped. We're wrapped we're done yeah oh thank you so much best friends oh there we go well done i gotta say when i braced myself to listen to a lizzo interview i didn't expect it to go down the path that it did yeah oh that's what i thought did you see her interview on the project super high energy yeah heats of laughter just constant like smart ass, but you guys were talking about climate change, mental health, like that was a DNM. There we go. I get that out of my guests. Almost like a chat fit for a podcast.

There we go. I'm glad you played it here. Did you like it? It was fun, right? I did. I'm annoyed that I wasn't in town at the time. I was playing bingo out in the country, so I would have liked to have just tagged along to say, hello, this is the other Mitch. Priorities. We had a bit of fun. Yeah, Lizzo and I are great friends. All right, let's get out of here.

It's been a great first show back. It has. God, me intervening about your horrific diet and a chat with Lizzo. It's like yin and yang. It really is. And Jenna, great to have you back. A couple of you skipped Zumba for us, Jenna. That's really generous.

I know. And you know what? I'm going to skip body combat because it starts soon. Oh, Lizzo went overboard. Can I tell you, I was actually thinking the other day, I wonder if Jenna is going to get back into Zumba because it was all you did when I first met you in like 2016. Very, very true. And I started going to my yoga and Pilates classes and I was like, I wonder if Jenna

still does her classes. Would you take me to a class? Jenna, I've always wanted to do a Zumba. Of course. Actually, do you know what? It could be really good for you because you clearly don't have the self-discipline to go to the gym and focus. Correct.

Because if you're the only one that you're accountable to, you'll just go home early. Oh, so you feel guilty? Yes. If you go to a class, there's literally a teacher there telling you what to do and you have to do it in sync with everyone. You can't just leave, although I did. That's a whole other story. But is it dancing?

Oh, for Zumba? Yeah. Oh, it depends what class you go to. Okay. We'll talk about this off the air. It's incredibly boring. We'll be back next Yeah. Oh, it depends what class you go to. Okay, we'll talk about this after. It's incredibly boring. We'll be back next week. One episode a week.

Yes, every Monday. It's Idja Monday, people. That's right. Get it trending. Make sure you subscribe to the podcast. If you're on Apple Podcasts. I'm just three pen across the room. So sorry.

Or if you're on Spotify. I learnt over the holidays that Spotify have a different set up. One of my older family members was like, there is no subscribe button. You're always raving on about it. You and I are both Apple users, right? I've never realized that Spotify, you follow on Spotify. So if you use Spotify, follow us there.

All these fucking fandangled words. It's like with LGBT community. You've really got to break it down for our fucking dumb listeners. Someone messaged me and said, how do I review on Spotify? I don't think you can. Neither can I. So if you're listening, don't fucking bother. We only want the reviews on Apple.

Although on Apple, we're at 99 reviews. So someone needs to leave a goddamn review, get us to 100. You won't get anything in return. That's two new year's resolutions you've failed. Remember how you said your new year's resolution was to get to 100, is it just me, reviews on the Apple app?

Mitch, I barely remember Jenna's name on the app. Let alone it. Alright, well let's go. We're getting out of here. We'll be back next week. See you next week. Bye. Is It Just Me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. Welcome to A to D Brief.

Hi. If you're new here, this is our secret segment. Essentially, we're trying to trick technological tards out of listening to this part. So people like my family members or like my next door neighbor, Joanne, who maybe doesn't want to hear me overshare about my sex life in this section of the show. We want to trick them into thinking that the show is over and then we head into this bonus segment. And we call it ADD Brief because we don't stay on track, we don't focus, we go on tangents. Exactly.

Like we always do. That's what comes best to us. Now, we've also won three radio awards for this segment because we've broken boundaries. I mean, Hillary Clinton almost shattered the glass ceiling and we just pushed our foot through and we did it because we have introduced live calls, active and live tweets. Now, in 2020, not only can you tweet, all you have to do is add Mitch.

What is it? What's the thing? A couple of Mitches. It's been a while, hasn't it? We've got another one now. Oh, my God, it's a video message. Who's this from? Someone said, so glad the show's back.

What's going on? This is Alicia And I'm hanging out with Mitch till midnight Oh my god, Alicia Keys loves the show Oh my god Hey, can I tell you something that we have actually installed Not live calls or live tweets Because none of those are happening Is a Facebook group for ADD briefers only

Yeah, that's cool So head to couple of Mitch's on Facebook You'll see the group there, it's called Endururant idiots so people that stick around the longest idiots um and the entry question is don't tell them okay oh they have to figure out the answer you fuck the answer okay they'll know it anyway what's what is our bonus segment that's that's the entry question yeah and also what's the is mitch the best name in the world yeah that's also. And you wouldn't believe the amount of people that have joined the group, like requested, and they've left that answer blank. I don't accept them.

They're not allowed in the group. Oh, I just hit accept to everyone. I let a lot of people in that don't answer the question. What, have you? Because, yeah, maybe a dozen. I leave them there on purpose. Oh, really? They don't deserve to be in the club.

Okay, well, from now on, yeah, I've just gone and looked at all our member requests. We have zero pending. You've let them all in, you bastard. I let everyone in. That's fine. We welcome one or one. We welcome everyone. Yes, please do.

Oops, hold on. Someone's here. Who's that? Hey, it's Lizzo. Hey, I want to make with my boy Mitch. What you doing there? What the fuck? She's there.

Hey, you know how I just said, you can't leave the class. And then I said, oh, actually, I did, though. I decided not to say anything further. I was like, I'm going to say this. Oh, your Zumba class. Yes, yes, yes. Because then I said, oh, actually, I did, though. I decided not to say anything further. And I was like, I'm going to say this. Oh, your Zumba class. Yes, yes, yes. Because it's an embarrassing story, actually. Why don't you poo yourself?

Well, in a roundabout way, this is your fault. What? Because last year on the show, you probably don't remember, the last show, you said, oh, this is my New Year's resolution. I'm a sucker for it. I do it every year. You clearly haven't stuck to it. That's an Uber Eats receipt. And you were pushing me into setting a New year's resolution i'm a sucker for it i do it every year you clearly haven't stuck to it and you were pushing me into setting a new year's resolution and i was like i don't

really want to i'm not a big believer in them because i always feel like i let myself down because i set these unrealistic goals well after all of your nagging because that that conversation continued off there you were like oh come on just set a new year's resolution decided to try yoga which i'm doing and i'm loving, but there was a hiccup. Okay? God, this is my fault that you've done yoga. In a roundabout way because you're the one that told me to have a new year's resolution. Fuck, I've got influence.

I didn't even realise. Yeah, you were being quite persistent about it. Yeah, I was actually. And then I had to think about it and I was like, maybe I'll do yoga. Apparently it's good for like mindfulness and breathing and being present. I saw this tweet. You did Bikram, right? Yeah.

Now, I am no longer doing Bikram. Explain what Bikram is for people who don't know. Okay, so Bikram is like a form of yoga that takes place in a heated studio. What the hell? So we're talking 40 degrees and 40% humidity on purpose. So anyway, I do a quick Google search. Yoga studios in five dock. Cause I'm like, all right, new year's resolution.

Let's do this. I found this one called Zen warrior. And I was like, that sounds great. But I tried calling them. I tried texting them. I tried emailing them. I don't know if it was like the Christmas shutdown, but they just weren't getting back to me.

And so I had that like, well, they've lost my business moment. And I found a Bikram studio nearby and I thought, all right, we'll go there instead. We'll hire the competition seeing as they clearly don't want my business. They don't want my money. Then worry. And so I went on the website and I saw the fact that it was a heated studio. State of the art. They made it sound so great.

They listed all these benefits of the heated studio. Burns fat quicker. I was like, sounds great. Yeah. And I was in this haze of, oh, new year, new me, whatever. I'll do it for Mitch. I'll do it for Mitch. Not for you.

Just for the fact that, oh, yeah, whatever. Like, it's a challenge. Like, whatever. I'll take it on. I'll do the 40 degree yoga. Yeah. Oh, my God. It was genuinely, like, traumatizing.

It was the most horrific thing I've ever been through. Really? Yeah. So, hold on. I'll just paint a picture. Let's just put this in. Are you in yoga? Well, here's the thing, actually. genuinely like traumatizing. It was the most horrific thing I've ever been through. Really? Yeah. So hold on. I'll just paint a picture. Let's just put this in. Are you in yoga?

Well, here's the thing, actually. It's funny you say that because guess what? What? There was none of that. None? None. What? I thought I was going to walk into like a beautiful room with some shitty Spotify spa music playlist with a little scented candle.

Yeah. No. I walked in. It was a bunch of fat old people in their underwear dripping in sweat. And the teacher just says to me, you knew me? I was like, yep. And then he goes, you realize it's a heated studio? And I was like, yes.

And he was like giving me the rundown. Like, okay, so 40 degrees, 40% humidity. You sure you're going to do this? And again, I was in some dumb haze where I was like, sure, I'll do it. I took one step in the heated studio and I thought, oh my God, what have I signed up for? This is horrific. Apparently they're trying to replicate the climate of India. Why?

It's not nice there. What, did they put a dead dog in the corner of the studio so it smelled like it too? That's horrible. I mean, come on! Anyway, so he says to me, if you feel like you're struggling to keep up or the heat's overwhelming, just lie down on your back. What, die? Yeah, just

like take it. Just submit to the chest pains if it's too much. Yeah, exactly. Just cool down by lying down in a 40 degree room. A stroke is just a mental reset. Let it happen. Jesus. It was a class of 26 poses. Guess how many I got through. Oh, half?

Six. Oh, Mitch. I don't know how you got through six. It was seriously terrifying. No nice music. It was just people going, and I'm not even fucking with you, a room of people in unison going. Oh, and it's humid.

It's like New Delhi. And also the instructor was like, I don't do the poses i just say him you copy the person next to you so he's just standing up the front in his underwear going hand up leg up twist and i was like i was literally there is something about being stuck in a boiling chamber that makes you feel a little bit irrational but i started crying why am i here i can't escape and so i laid down and then it was meant to be peaceful but i started feeling my chest get tighter you know that like the physical signs of anxiety and i was just there and i'm like all right i need to plan my exit yeah so i'll make instructor who doesn't do the moves yeah he would intermittently go and open one of the doors to the foyer to let a little bit of cold slash fresh air through.

And I'm lying there and I'm like, all right, next time he opens the door, I'm out. I'm out. Oh, this is like one of those captive movies where they hold the girls in the basement. Exactly. Because he'd go, open one door, and then walk in the opposite direction.

So I know he had his back to me. First time I was like, no, I can't do do it i was just petrified on the floor like and then the second time i made a run for it didn't even take me matt i just i just up and left you should have seen it the guy just goes and opens the door and he's there being like breathe like and i'm just like no with were you barefoot? Yeah. Oh, so you had wet feet slapping on the... Like a fish. Like a seal at SeaWorld, running for the ball. And I literally, it looked like I was trying to flee from a murder.

You know that Netflix show, You? Oh, no. It was literally like... You were Beck. It was Beck trying to escape from Jo running up the stairs. Oh, no, the poor bitch. Absolutely. I was just like, this is my moment.

I'm free. Get to the front door. Oh, no, the poor bitch. Absolutely. I was just like, this is my moment. I'm free. Get to the front door. Oh, no. It's locked. I'm out in the foyer. I've left the heater studio. I'm like, all right, one last hurdle. The front door.

The bastard's locked. I'm like jiggling the handle going, no, please, please, it's open. And then this woman appears out of nowhere. I swear she wasn't there when I walked in. And she just goes, sorry, darling, we're in lockdown. What? As long as the class is on, the building's in lockdown. I was like, hang on, so you're holding me here against my will.

There's a word for that, kidnapping. Yeah. Helen. Like, let me out. And then she says to me, oh, sorry, duty of care, I can't let you go without a hydrolite because you've dehydrated so much and you're panicking. Makes a point. I was like, fine.

So she gives me a hydrolite and then starts telling me her life story. Oh, what is it? Like so much. She goes, oh, yeah, my sister's in hospital, but it's a much nicer hospital than last time because last time they didn't even, like she just went on this big rant. No pauses.

I'm just looking at her nodding going, how the fuck do I get out? Sipping on my hydrolite. And then, againding, going. Sweating. How the fuck do I get out? Sipping on me Hydro-Lite. And then, again, that thing that you see in all the murderer movies. I started doing that thing where I just, you know, tell them what they want to hear to try and make them think I'm on their side. I was like, don't worry. I won't give up.

I'll definitely come back. She goes, yeah, it's normal to be nervous the first time you're doing a Bikram yoga class. But the next time, you'll feel the benefits. And I was like, I know. I can't wait. Like, I'll be back. Don't wait. Like, I'll be back. Don't worry.

Like, I'm determined. Let me the fuck out. Yeah. For now, I just need you to open the fucking door or I'm going to fucking, like, break that glass somehow. It might be with your forehead. Anyway. Did she let you out?

Eventually. Well, no, they wouldn't let me out until the class was finished. I only made it through 20 minutes out of 90. I just sat there listening to her life story, sipping on my HydroLite. And you had to pay? Oh, I've actually, my pass is still active. Like, I could go now if I wanted to. Oh, my God.

Maybe we should do one as a group, you, me and Jenna. No, I, see, that sounds like funny content, but I genuinely wouldn't put either of you through it. I don't think I could do it. I'm sweating now in an 18-degree room. It was so fucked up. It was so fucked up. And that's weird, because normally getting yelled at by a sweaty man in his undies is your kink. So that's very weird.

Well, actually, he was quite nice in the end. He comes out and goes, oh, I was wondering where you went. I was worried. You left your mat. I was like, keep it. She's haunted. I don't want that. It's still there.

I left the mat. He's like, here it is. Drops it on the ground. Well, anyway, I ended up getting a hold of Zen Warrior Studio and I was like, you assholes. You will never believe what you put me through. But anyway, I've joined and I love it now. And that is a normal temperature room.

Yes, they've got air con, they've got candles. Most of the instructors' names are things like, I don't know, Deb and Steph. Yes. Like, if you've got names like Deb and Steph, you don't need to earn my trust. You've got it. I agree.

If you're Zinu and you're sweating in your undies, you can fuck right off. I can't remember his name, actually. I can find out. I did yoga as a school sport in high school because I couldn't do any of the actual sports. And I absolutely loved it. I did it in the same room I did maths in. That really surprised me that you did yoga. I loved it.

Oh, the guy's name was Max. I just checked on the app. Oh, that's actually quite normal, to be honest. Yeah. Anyway. I had it. My break was guy's name was Max. I just checked on the app. Oh, that's actually quite normal, to be honest. Yeah. Anyway. I had a... My break was good. Thanks for asking the two of you. You've already brought it up without us asking. Oh, Alicia Keys hotel room. Oh! Best friends.

Did I tell you that story? I wasn't sure if you wanted to tell it on the show, so I didn't want to spoil it. Oh. Do you want to save it for another time, or should you just tell us? Is it that good? No, it's not good, so I'll tell it now. No. Jenna and I, I was in LA. Jenna was there too. We actually caught up. We've already said that all. Yeah.

I interviewed Alicia Keys at this apartment, and I was originally told that it was her house. So I was like, I'm going to Alicia Keys' house. Oh, my God, get my hair done. And I got there, and it was an apartment. And then I got to the outside of the hotel room, went to the foyer, this big burly security guard at the hotel, and he was like, no. And I was like, Mitchell, sh foyer, this big burly security guard at the hotel. And he was like, no.

And I was like, Mitchell Chury? He's like, you're not on the list. I was like, no, I think I am. I'm from Kirsten, Sydney. I'm interviewing Alicia. He's like, I know who you're here for. I'm like, oh, okay, sure. Mitchell Chury's like, you're not on here, mate.

And I was like, oh, no. So I called my contact at the music label. I'm like, I'm not on the list. He's like, yes, you are. Check again. So I went up. I said, I think I'm on the list. Can I have a look?

And he looks here. He goes, Chury. I went, he goes cheery oh yeah you went oh yeah under here is michelle oh no it's mitchell please i've been there trust me what happens all the time it's just one extra e at the end and you're all you're fucked so he let me up he saw my id and it was australian i think he was very confused there was a lot of yellow and there was a waratah in the middle he had no fucking clue what was on that driver's license so he let me up and i walk this hall it's a like a maybe like an l shape so i get out of the lift turn right there's a waratah in the middle. He had no fucking clue what was on that driver's license. So he let me up. And I walk this hall. It's maybe like an L shape. So I get out of the lift, turn right. There's a corner in front of me. And there's a man sitting in a chair, security guard.

I'm like, oh, God. Walk down the L, turn right, another man in the corner. I'm like, Jesus, it's all for Miss Keys. Walk down. And then there's like a penthouse door. You know how the penthouse is always right at the end? And it's flat against the main wall because it's big. And there were three chairs sitting out the front

and there was this man sitting there and I go, oh, here for Alicia? He went, who's my, who's my? And I was like, oh, God. That sounded like your Lizzo chat in Rewind. Or Simish. And I was like, oh, is this for the Alicia Keys? Yes.

I was like, oh, okay. Oh, God, he had a whole page of notes. I'm like, gosh, you've got a lot of notes there. And I was like, this is so weird. Then the music label lady comes up. Hey, Mitch. Good. Sven.

Oh, you're next. Then she speaks German to him. He's an international journalist. He had to talk to Alicia. And I'm like, oh, my God. All right. They're running a bit behind. What was she promoting?

Her new album, doing the Grammy. She just hosted James Corden. She had a lot on that week. It was huge. How have I missed all of that? I know. I've not seen or heard of her in a long time. Album's not out.

The new song's phenomenal, Underdog. By Ed Sheeran wrote it. I didn't realise that was her. Yeah, it's phenomenal. Anyway, then she goes, all right, Sven, you've got 30 minutes with Alicia. I was like, Jesus! So I just sit there for 30. So the interview happens for 30 and then I'm about to go in.

How much was your allocation? Like seven minutes as opposed to 30? No, I actually had 15. And I had the Australian exclusive. No one else in the country had Alicia Keys. Right. So that's why I haven't heard anything from her. Yes.

Because you haven't posted it anywhere, and no one else has talked to her. Anyway, I go in, and she's sitting there, and she's eating a seaweed, like the seaweed sheets. And I was like, hey, Alicia. She's sitting there and she's eating a seaweed, like a nought in the seaweed sheets. And I was like, hey, Alicia. She's like, hey, baby. She's like, oh, I needed a break. Like, do you mind? We're just waiting in here.

I just need to, like, go to the bathroom quickly. And I was like, yeah, my God, go for it. So I sit down and she's like, make yourself at home, have some food, snacks. I'm like, okay. It was just me and Alicia. I was like, sure. And she went to the bathroom. I was like, cool.

Just checking the microphones are working seaweed snacks 15 minutes later alicia keys hasn't emerged from the toilet and i'm thinking is she doing a poo she was doing a dump she might have been or she might have been shoohing up there might have been a whole team in there it might have been a door that led to another fucking door that led to a house i don't know but she took a time you know was this her hotel room? This was an apartment. I think I was told it was her apartment, but I think it was her home. Because I was going to say, I mean, if she's in her own home, do her shit. I think it was her own home.

Anyway, then she came out and the interview was phenomenal and she was happy as all hell. So I think she just shat because she was in a post-shit, you know, she was lightened. Maybe that's why Lizzo was a little bit take a dump you should suggest that before every interview just go i've been allocated 10 minutes by your label i will sacrifice three to four of them for you to lay a log movement yeah and then we'll go from there because it's going to be worth our time if you're not all tense yeah very good point very good point but alicia was great interview great chat but I thought she did a shit. And actually, I don't have to slander her.

She was lovely, and at the end, she was like, you were such a good interviewer. Oh, my God, do you do this for a living? I'm like, well, yes. No, no, they just found me. I was on Hollywood Boulevard pretending to be Iron Man. No, I actually deliver milk. I found this microphone stick.

They put it on air tasker. I was just like, I can do that. She was so cute. We have these two microphones. I think they're stick. They put it on AirTasker. I was just like, I can do that. She was so cute. We have these two microphones that you actually, I think they're yours. You gave them to me. They're just basic microphones that are wireless and battery operated. You turn them on and they record into an internal memory.

Yeah, I love those microphones. I use them all the time. There's no prep. It's one mic, one mic, nothing, no buttons, anything. And I gave it to her and she was like, oh, where's the cord? And I was like, I don't need one. She's like, but how will it record? And I was like, it goes internally. She was like, but why is it flashing? I'm like, because buttons, anything. And I gave it to her and she was like, oh, where's the cord? And I was like, I don't need one. She's like, but how will it record? And I was like, it goes internally.

She was like, but why is it flashing? I'm like, because it's recording. Like, it's all good. The flashing is a good thing, Alicia. There's an SD card in there. It works. And then she goes, do you want to record it on your phone as backup? And I was like, okay.

What a smart woman. I usually pop a voice memo on just in case. What a smart girl. Anyway, so I did. Did you take her suggestion? Yeah, I did. And I've got the audio. On your phone?

Yes. Show me. Okay. Well, and actually, you know what? This will prove my point that I'm not lying. I've got all these bloody messages. Wow, I'm a sucking popular. Alicia Keys.

What's it called? Memos, isn't it? Yeah. We have to get out of here. I've got to do my night show. Yeah. Number one rating. Here we go. Alicia Keys, Los Angeles. So? Memos, isn't it? Yeah. We have to get out of here. I've got to do my night show. Yeah. Number one rating. Here we go.

Alicia Keys, Los Angeles. So there's a 30-minute file. Oh, my God. And the start of it is just poo. Show me. Give it here. Oh, my God. Oh, what was that?

That was definitely you letting on, right? What? So her publicist walked in like a minute later and I spoke to her the whole 20 minutes. Fast forwarding. Is it on the... 13 minutes in and she hasn't appeared yet. This must be some Mind Over Matter shit,

but I could all of a sudden smell excrement. I was like, oh, did someone fart? Because I was thinking about her doing a turd. 15 minutes in. There we go. She's in the room now. She gave my mum a shout out too. Ready?

Michelle, she's a massive fan. Oh, Michelle, I love you. Aw. She'll my mum a shout out too. Ready? Michelle, she's a massive fan. Oh, Michelle, I love you. I'll make this a text tone. Hey, this is showing all her book club friends. This is boring. All her book club friends. Yeah, she loved that. Anyway, Alicia Keys was great. I have no real stories from the holiday.

I got straight back to work. I'm very busy. Speaking of book club, I saw on Apple TV the other day. you know Apple TV plus their streaming service? Yes. Oprah's book club is one of the shows. Yeah, and she's so face tuned on that logo. Have a look.

I thought it was Claymation. I actually put an episode of that on the other day, and even though I have not read the book she's talking about, I was so enthralled by every word. Anything Oprah says, I'd buy. Yeah, honestly. Did you finish Morning Wars? Of course I finished Morning Wars. The ending was truly tragic.

I've got one more episode left Okay, don't say anything Have you noticed that there aren't many shows on Apple TV Plus? It's horrendous I don't want to watch Hayley Steinfeld pretend to be Mary Antoinette Who is she? It's some alpha I did watch Truth Be Told What's that?

What's that chick's name? Hold on Sorry, that's just Alicia She's saying thanks for bringing light. I did indeed poo. There you go. That's what she had to say. Jenna, turn your phone off when we record. Jesus Christ.

Mitch, turn your phone off. You both have new ringtones. Okay, so truth be told, Octavia Spencer, you know that chick that's been in like a million movies. She baked the poo into the pie. It's literally about her hosting a true crime podcast. It's like Michelle Laurie of America. Imagine that. And then we go out and watch her investigate it

and then come back and make the podcast about it. And it's really good. Oh, what's it called? Truth Be Told. And it's on Apple TV? Yes. Oh, I'd like that actually. It's the only other show on Apple TV that's good.

Shit, I can't watch that. Oh, God. Someone else is at the door. Who is it? Hey, it's Dua Lipa and I'm hanging with Mitch tonight. Hey, Dua.

How are you, girl? I thought we said we were going to get more sound effects so that this stupid gag you do was less repetitive. But Jenna thinks it's funny. I agree with you there.

Oh, shut up. Jenna missed Zumba for this content. I know. I must say, our studio's looking very schmick. We've got the new background. Yeah, the house.

Anyone that follows our Instagram, at couple of Mitches, you'd see that we updated our backdrop. We used to have a city skyline, but then we thought that's not relatable and doesn't really represent us. No. So we got just a picture of a random suburban house. I Googled St. Mary's, Western Sydney real estate. We chose a beautiful home.

Yep. Nothing special. Nothing scabby, nothing special though. Champagne Avenue? No, Adelaide Avenue. And I also figured that it represents our listenership versus like an actual popular show's listenership. We got rid of a cityscape and just got a five bedroom home. It's beautiful. I'm a radio guy and all

radio shows, my show Mitch to Midnight has a cityscape and you made it Mitch. You said it's from, what's the city in mine? Oh, the city in yours because yours is national. They put Brisbane because it's the most generic looking city. So my city is Brisbane. Sydney has like iconic buildings and so does Melbourne. So Brisbane, like that could be anywhere. That could be fucking Perth.

It actually looks very New York-y. If you're on Z100 in New York, you've got the New York skyline. If you're in LA, you've got LA, Abu Dhabi, Abu Dhabi. I'm telling you, don't hear we go me. When I made our backdrop, I just didn't really give it any thought. I just thought, oh, I literally Googled Sydney. Oh, no, I got into one of those image providers that we have for work, Jenna.

Like Getty or something. Yeah, we actually have copyright for that picture. I Googled yellow sky so it was like an afternoon sunset because our theme's yellow. And so I was like, yeah, there's a cute picture of Sydney that'll do I didn't put any thought into the fact that that looks a bit wanky doesn't it well you just don't really represent us at all you're lucky that the house we chose actually has urine on the pathway at the front because it's Penrith so it matches the yellow sky maybe we should get people to send pictures of their homes to put in the background because I'm dead set. What should be in our background is the question.

Well, I like the idea of a suburban home. I think we should keep that trend going. I think so. My house is – we could do my house. We could do your house in Bogengate. Your sister's house would look good on the screens. Oh, yes. Or my apartment block in Five Docks.

That could be a vibe. Yeah. It's real B-grade suburbs. Like, Coogee? Fuck it off. Cronulla? Nope. Bondi?

No way. Aren't you from Cronulla? Yeah, but it's too known. You want a five dock. Or you want a Haberfield. Or a Baker's Field. Can I tell you, I'm not actually from five dock technically. I'm from Abbotsford, an even more small and unknown suburb.

Shit. Where are you, Jenna? And I freaking love it. I'm Macquarie Park. Yeah, very true. Do you like living there? Yeah, how's this? Jenna moved into an apartment near Macquarie Park because it's right next to our office, also'm Macquarie Park. Yeah, very true. Jenna moved into an apartment near

Macquarie Park because it's right next to our office also in Macquarie Park and now we're moving premises. So she's going to have to move to Piermont which is much more expensive. Much more. Jenna, how do you feel about that? This show has gone on way too long. Now that we're getting back into the sound effects we should go.

Zumba for this. We need to get out. Door's locked. Jenna can't escape. Jenna, go. She can't get out of here. I've locked her in. Oh, there she is. On your way out.

Shit. It's raining. Well, anyway, guys, thank you for having us back. We've got a big year planned. Mitch and I have been brainstorming. Let me tell you, lots of guest hosts in store. We're going to be doing collabs with other podcasts. Yeah, we have some celebrity co-hosts ready to go.

Where do you see the future of this podcast, Jenna? Because we've got all these grand plans for the year. Jenna, where do you see it going? What are you going to contribute this year? Nothing because it's crap. Correct. Just seed in the bin. Jenna won't.

Oh, more Jenna's junk. Oh, Jenna's junk is good. We could keep that going. You know that you're allowed to do more than just that, Jenna. Yes, I know, but I'd rather not because it's just terrible. The tension. Okay. You know what?

I've actually got access in 2020. We've got a new computer system in here. Can you not? I was wrapping up. I want people to be glad we're back. I know dreading this i just want to prove this because people can you can request a sound effect don't forget just request it 1310 that's people sorry that's my um brain uh fucking haywiring i've got access to the internet on this fader now right so i can give me the most obscure sound effect you want ready Ready? Just think of one. An angel screaming. Okay.

Mitch, you think of one too. Okay. So if you're new here, you'd remember that Mitch likes to play random sound effects during ADD Brief because we've got permission to go rogue. And my word, does he take advantage of it? And I fucking hate it because he just has a library of like 10 sound effects. And I said, if you're going to do this, have some variety. Does he listen to me?

Never. And here is an angel screaming, courtesy of Jenna. But now we have YouTube. There you go. Mitchell, what's your sound effect? Can you push Chicago Broken Tornado Siren? That's a good one. You've played this for me when we were at your house drunk,

and it really scared me. I like to do it when people are around and it's not to help them explain it. I just look around and go, what's that? Is this it? Turn it up. Imagine that going off. That's awful. Oh, it goes back up. No, I don't like that. That's awful. Oh, it goes back up.

No, I don't like that. That's scary. You know, sometimes when I'm uploading something on my computer, and you know how if your computer, if you're uploading something and you let it go and then your computer, like, goes to sleep, like the screen goes black, it'll stop the upload? Yeah. If I ever want something to stay, to upload,

and it's going to take a while, I literally Google Chicago broken tornado siren, 10-hour loop, and then I just leave it there open and put it on mute. And so that's what keeps my computer awake because it's playing a YouTube video. That's a good idea. And it's always that one, the Chicago tornado siren. People look at my YouTube history and go,

why has he watched this for like 40 hours in total? Anyway, we'll see you next week on... Monday. Oh, God. This is way too much. Can we go? Sorry about that, yeah. It's been great to be back, guys,

but bloody hell, I'm over it. Let's go. Me too. It's been a great show. I mean, last time we were here... Let's go. Oh, God. And we had Vanessa Amorosi great show. I mean, last time we were here. Let's go. God. And we had Vanessa Amorosi.

Strap yourself in for another year of this nonsense, guys. It's going to be fun, ladies and gents. I should have gone, Ijum, how are you feeling? Oh, wait, hold on. Ready? Hold on. This is what I should have got. Ijum, how are you feeling?

Kiss, how are you feeling? Oh, you're a kid. I can't do it. You should have, how you feeling? Kiss, how you feeling? Oh, you're a good one. I can't tell you. You should have gotten her to say, like an Australian version, being like, check my nails. Darling, how you doing? Feeling good as hell. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'll get my nuggets from the local Mackey's. Sweet and sour sauce. Extra pickles. No, what could you make the Australian one? It'd be like, I flick me ponytail. What would check your nails be? No, the Australian version would be, I'll get my doll check. Send to link.

Payment in the bank. I don't think you're understanding the game. That's Aussie. You take the existing lyrics and you say it how an Australian would. So instead of I do my hair toss, you say, I flick me ponytail. Oh, okay. What would check my nails be? I'll flick me rat's tail.

Flick my toes. Yes. Baby, how you feeling? No, darling, how you doing? Darling, how you doing? Feeling fucking great. Hey, let's do that again. Ready?

Oh, Google an instrumental of good as hell. I can get one up because I've got the internet access. Give us one reason. Oh, sorry. Another ad.

Fucking hell. What's it called? reason. Sorry, another ad. Fucking hell. What's it called? Good. Sorry, that sounded like a fucking elephant was stampeding. Sounded like the beginning of The Lion King when the stampede happens. Simba. You do it. Oh, shit.

I'll do it now. I flick me ponytail. Clip me toes. Darling, how you doing'll do it now. I'm flick me ponytail. Clip me toes. Darling, how you doing? Feeling fucking great. Yes. That's brilliant. Thank you.

Oh, we'll send that to Lisa. She'll love it. Oh, you're very good friends now. We're close friends, so I'll just DM it to her. Yeah. That's fucking great. All right, let's get out of here. All right, thanks, guys.

See, aren't you glad I dragged it on? Because we wouldn't have had that nugget of gold? Not really. Our best stuff comes at the end. It's almost like when murderers admit to their crimes just before they die. Okay. See you, everyone. Thank you, Jenna.

What does that mean? Bye. Bye. See you. Hard rap. Oh, sorry. All right, see you guys. See you on Monday.

See you. Bye. Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app.