Is It Just Me? - #149: Breakup Bullshit

Episode Date: June 19, 2023

If you're going through a breakup, this is the episode for you. In this episode: Chaotic calendars (13:49) Supportive partnerships (16:54) Moving on after hurt and heartbreak (23:09) Being kind to yourself during a breakup (34:02) The Alice Springs stalker (48:07) Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (58:56)   Hit us up: @coupleofmitches Send us a text: 0422 948 202   Mental health support: Call Lifeline Australia on 13 11 14, or visit lifeline.org.auSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Hello you! Hello you! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Would you rather sit on a cake and eat a dick or sit on a dick and eat a cake? Sit on a dick and eat a cake, absolutely. If you sit on the cake you ruin it.

Do you think I'd ever waste a cake by sitting on it? Now here's Mitch Chudy and Mitchell Coombs. Hello, you. Hello, you. Oh, you poor thing. You sick little dog. I'm not well. Oh.

But I'm soldiering on. What's wrong? You got the sniffle nose? You got your hoodie on? It's just whatever's going around. Enough about me. Let me know what happened after last week. You announced the breakup.

I did. How'd you go with all the beautiful DMs coming through? Oh my god. I just have to say how grateful I am for our idiots and our audience. They pulled me out of the darkness. That announcement going out on the podcast was one of the hardest things I've ever had to do.

Did you listen? I didn't. I can't. I know you sent me the edit before it went to air. Yeah, because you were a bit anxious about it. I was like, let me know if you want me to cut anything. I did not, really. Well, I mean, let's just preface it by saying I was very kind. I was a three on the scale of... How savage?

Oh, yeah. I could have dialed it right up to an 11, and maybe I'll get there one day, but I was very kind. And I just want to say thank you from the bottom of my heart to all the idiots that reached out. I seriously was shocked. Like there were hundreds of messages. Hundreds? Hundreds. It was absolutely beautiful.

I'm not going to shout out names because some were better than others and there were a lot of spelling errors in some and we'll send notes back. Don't worry, I'll mark them. But oh my God, it made me feel so loved and so warm. Were there any filthy messages as well? Because I did say now that you're single, you might have a few flirty idiots coming to your DMs. Oh my God.

Didn't waste a minute. By the way, Prizekeeper Jenna, thanks for fucking rocking up this week. I'm back. Hi, Prizekeeper Jenna. Thanks so much for ditching Mitch in that his hour of need. No problem. The one time I need you to be a sympathetic listener and you fuck off. Yeah, well, you didn't wish me a happy birthday.

I did wish you. I don't. I sent you a personal message. Yeah, but there's no proof of that for everyone else. You can attest to it. Don't know. Are you still shitty about that, Jenna? Yeah, I am.

In my time of need, you bring that up. Yes. You bitch. So we're all on Struggle Street today. Thank God. We're all fucked. Yeah, let me read you some of these DMs I got. The filthy ones?

Well, they kind of helped because... Let me just play some music. It's a hot music. This is elevator music. It's fine. It's kind of hot, you know. Surely there's some sexy jazz or something. If you're going to do a reenactment of the filthy DMs. Okay, hold on. Yeah, this isn't the right music, is it? No. I feel like I'm in the appointment

room of a doctor's office. It's like the haberdashery section at Myer. It is. It really is. Is that still around? Who knows? Haberdashery? Okay, what about this? Oh no, sorry. That's wrong. What is that? I recognise that. Is that Pornhub?

Yes, it's Pornhub! What is that? I'm sending that to Sean! What? What is that? Oh, I can to Sean. What? What is that? Oh, I can hear that sound. I've been using it every night the past few weeks. Here we go. Sorry. Here we go.

Porn music. Here we go. So these are some of the messages that I got that have really, they've been really, like, heartwarming, to be honest. Someone says. Heartwarming? Well, someone said to me, Mitch, when you enter your slut era, I want to be the first one to wrap my lips around your fat cock. Oh.

Oh. Someone said to me, hi, cutie. I've always wanted to fuck you, but out of respect for Hayden, I never messaged. Well, here we are with a wave emoji. That's quite nice. Isn't that nice? Yeah, that's lovely. Another one says, you're spectacular.

You will find someone that respects you. And until then, I will happily take your loads. Loads. What a way we've learned. That's sweet. Multiple loads, in fact. Wow. I mean, we've been doing this podcast for nearly four years.

I was single for three of those and I got nothing like that. Hi, daddy. Just out of the blue. Oh, not daddy. I don't mind it. Yeah, I mind it. I'd accept that. I've got a couple of photos.

I've received a couple of videos. And I just want to say. Did people send ass pics? Yes, they did. Yeah, they did. Do you want to see one? Not particularly. I don't think you're supposed to show other people's nudes.

Oh, fuck you. You're right. Sorry, I wanted to say if it was a disappearing photo. I would have drawn a piece of paper for you. Oh, gosh. I will preface this by saying I don't want to be with anyone. I'm deeply sad. But you've got someone lay by.

I've got someone lay by. For when the slut era strikes. I just could never. I don't want to even touch anyone. I'm such a romantic. I'm so heartbroken by the relationship ending and by Hayden. Even though it was my choice. I'm actually very sad.

Oh, shit. I've got a breakup related segment later. Is that going to be a good thing or a bad thing for you right now? No, it's okay. I'm so, I'm actually very sad. Oh shit. I've got a breakup related segment later. Is that going to be a good thing or a bad thing for you right now? No, it's okay. I'm working through it. I'm better. But, um, you know, when you get hurt, your question is everything. It throws everything into, you know, into question.

You've got a gorgeous aura this week. Do I? Like I said last week, I get a different Mitch every week. Sometimes you're furious. Sometimes you're devastated. I'm feeling a bit of chaos coming from you today. Really? Yeah.

I get that too. Oh, my God. I've been flirting hard. There's like three that I've been flirting with, but I don't want to do anything. Three of our listeners? One is a listener. Oh. Someone was flirting with me, and I don't know what came over me.

They called me Daddy, and I said, I'll fly you to Sydney. Oh. That's terrible. I don't have the budget for that. Why would you do that I said, I'll fly you to Sydney. Oh. That's terrible. I don't have the budget for that. In the same breath, you have said, I'm not ready. I'm still heartbroken. And now you're also offering to fly your twink bitches here as their daddy. Can I just say something?

Can I say something? This is my breakup advice. If you have been hurt and the breakup is done and you're feeling sad, some of the best things to get me out of it is a little flirt. It actually does. It really does. It makes you feel that you can get back out there. I mean, a harmless flirt, of course, is beautiful.

Don't accidentally lead anyone on and they're like, I've packed, I've got my carry on, five minutes with me. But yeah, a cheeky flirt is harmless. I'm on my healing journey. I've joined a gym. Have you? I'm walking every day. I'm on my healing journey. I've joined a gym. Have you? I'm walking every day. I'm doing mental health walks.

I've got Headspace, the app. Yeah. I bought a yoga mat. I'm having protein yogurt in the mornings. What are you going to do with the yoga mat? Sit on it. You should come to one of my bar classes. You'd love it.

Are you starting to be a lawyer? B-A-R-R-E. Is that how you spell that? Yeah. It's like a hybrid between – actually, Jenny, you'd love it too because I'd say it's a hybrid between yoga, Zumba and ballet. I love that. Now I'm walking.

I'm in my mental health walk. I walk King Street, Newtown every morning. Oh, what a dreadful street to walk down to try and kill your mental health. That's just so bad. That is disgusting. I will say, that's so true. I was walking it this morning and I had to step around a poor homeless man begging for money.

And then I almost hit a seagull. Don't know what the fuck it was doing in the middle of the CBD. And then I like fell into a bookstore. I'm like, this is awful. Yeah, it's so cluttered and loud. And no, that's not a good place to cleanse your mind. No. And then there's that fuck off giant chemist's warehouse that I walk past

I always get so tempted to go in. Yeah, I do love a chemist's warehouse. I love a chemist's warehouse. Anyway, I'm on the path to recovery. Still deeply sad. Just take any other path than King Street, Newtown, please. That's true. On thanking the listeners,

it's kept me a lot of company. It's made me really happy. But I want to thank you, Mitchell. And of course you, Jenna. Oh. You've both been very, very great friends to me this time, which is really nice.

No need to thank us. No, it's true. And that's the one, more advice, because actually that's funny. The messages that I got, a lot of kids are going for kids. Like I'm fucking 77.

I'm Santa at Westfield and people are coming up on my lap. Well, that'll be happening very soon. People have been saying that they're also going through breakups. There you go. And that they're also queer and having this angle. And you know what hit me? All the content that we watch as gay people is fucking love Simon and they're happy and then they break up for a day

and then they fall back in love on a roller coaster that same night. But then on the flip side, people always complain that every movie, TV show, every LGBTQ story usually ends in tragedy, like Brokeback Mountain and stuff. So how do they win? I know. No, it's true. But also that's such a part of the gay storyline, like AIDS,

the AIDS pandemic, the tragedy that was there, which is important to learn about. But I just think hearing real stories about actual heartbreak and trauma is good. So for the next couple of weeks, yeah, I'm probably just going to be down in the dumps and talking about it. But it's my way of healing, getting through it. It's like our contraceptive diaphragm,

Sam actually spoke to me and put it quite beautifully. He goes, Cherry made a great point when he said that there aren't many like queer breakup stories out there in the media. You said it was barren. You couldn't find any stories to relate to to sort of be a comfort during this period. And he said,

people forget when they're fighting for equal love that that also comes with equal heartbreak. Oh, Sam. That is so well said. Beautiful words, Sam. Oh,

wow. That is very well said, Sam. Yeah. Couldn't have said it better myself. He also said that your breakup announcement segment was the best thing we've ever done on the podcast. Yeah, he said that to me as well.

Hang on. I was like, I thought it was great, but the best thing we've ever done? Well, I mean, I will say, I got messages from people that haven't listened to the podcast in a long time. I mean, Delta fucking Goodrum sent me a heart emoji. Really? She's not listening to Is It Just Me, the podcast. Oh. This is a long time. I mean, Delta fucking Goodrum sent me a heart emoji. She's not listening to Is It Just Me, the podcast. This is a ratings success.

And now we'll reveal that Hayden and I are still together and it's all been a ratings ploy. Oh, God. Imagine how much trouble you'd get in. People would hate you if that was all a prank. A social experiment sponsored by Barocca and some bullshit. Anyway, how are you guys? Talk about you.

Mitch, can I say, Jenna, Mitch, as sick as he is, he looks good. He's tan. Yeah, you are very tan. Yeah. It's always the days that I'm feeling the worst that I get the most compliments on how I look. Like one time I came to work here, full mid-mental breakdown, and my boss was like, you're glowing. I was like, what the fuck are you talking about? It's the tears.

I haven't been crying, but I've just got that annoying blocked nose situation. So sorry if I sound yuck on the podcast today, but anyway. What's your issue, Jenna? We've both got one. She's still fucked off at us about forgetting a birthday. Well, I've said it. Just forget mine come September. Then we're all even with each other and we can move on and never talk about it.

We would never do that to a good friend. We'll be Jenna. No, never. No, you said that about Jenna when we forgot your birthday, so no. No, no, but now we're equal. What did you do for your birthday? Go. I did nothing because both of you forgot.

Shut up. We also didn't get an invite, to be fair. Yes, we didn't. To what? Exactly. Thank you. How were we to know? Yeah.

Good point, Mitchell. In many ways, it's your fault. Fuck, play the gaslighting Jenna scene because that is so fucked what I just said to her. Making it seem like it's her fault. Jenna, it's your fault. We forgot your big birthday event. I apologise once, I apologise again. Oh, Jenna, we love you.

I'm so sorry I didn't tell you both. I did bring choccies for you last week, but you didn't fucking rock up to the episode. And then I had to eat them all because I was announcing a life event that you didn't fucking turn up for, you bitch. Anyway, I'm accepting nudes, Mitchell's accepting strepsils, and Jenna is accepting condolences. Thank you. If it's your first time listening, it's Is It Just Me? Every week we start the show the same way. Something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Someone sent is it just me to me and they said is it just me on

the fly but do you guys waffle on for too long before you get to the idjams the show is called is it just me you should do them first and i should we do do them first that's what i said but i don't like the little intro the opener is supposed to be like two to three minutes it has been as long as 15 minutes before before we we actually start. This one's been long too. But also how fucking abrupt would it be if every episode just started with... Is it just me? Are we just not going to welcome you, say hello, nothing? That's just rude.

Even worse, what if we started it like this, ready? Now here's Mitch and Julie and Mitchell Coons. Hi you,, you. Hi, you. Is it just me or? A breakup's hard. That's so stupid. Who the fuck sent that feedback?

Is that what you want? Is that really what you want? Is that what you want? We know what's good for you. All right, let's start. I'm almost obliged to make the opener even longer today, out of spite. I mean, I can make it longer if we want to drag things out. I'm going on to Fiji very soon.

Are you? Really? Yeah. When? Well, I've told my ex, let's call him that. Wow, I've never heard you refer to him as the ex before. To get out of the house. He's living with his mum.

I kicked him out. And I've said, I'm moving out to greener pastures and I'm going to Fiji. So you pack your shit while I'm in Fiji. When I get back, it better be an empty house. Okay. Powerful. When are you going to Fiji? Two weeks.

First week of July. Where did you say you were going last week? It was meant to be Cook Islands. Yeah, okay. But it fell through. I'm not a cook. Is that the one they changed the name of? No, I think that's Fraser.

Fraser Island. I knew one of the islands changed names. Why did they change their name? Oh, they made it the traditional Indigenous one because they found out that Fraser was a dog back in the day. Yeah. Isn't Fraser Island the one with all the dingoes? I don't know.

Maybe. Long enough for you guys? No, I think let's go a bit longer Should we talk about geopolitical conflicts in the Ukraine? I haven't got much to say about that Let's start the show I will say that I've got a holiday story of mine coming up Oh

I was stalked in Alice Springs Oh my You poor thing By a rabid fan I wouldn't have said rabid, but in a way, yes Okay, well should I go first? We've still got a lot of fucking talking about me. Do you want to go first?

Should I go first? Yeah. Do you want to go with your is it just me first? Yeah, let's go. Is it just me or? Is the part where you have to rebook another appointment with a doctor or at an office the most awkward part of the whole experience? Oh, as in like you're on your way out?

On your way out, you need to book a second appointment and then you have to go through every personal event in your life as if they give a shit. Yeah, I find that really stressful. But they'll go, can you do Friday the 12th? And I'll go, Friday the 12th, I've got a haircut. I go, okay, what about the 19th? I go, the 19th is a Tuesday? Yeah, it is.

Oh, it's my mum's 60th. Do you want a happy birthday? I go, thanks. Yeah, we've just been to Hawaii. Oh, beautiful. March the 9th? I'm like, March the 9th, I do have a dental it's my mum's 60th. Do you want a happy birthday? Go, thanks. Yeah, we've just been to Hawaii. Oh, beautiful. March the 9th? March the 9th, I do have a dental appointment in the morning and the afternoon. She's doing root canal.

Like, they don't give a shit. Why do I tell her these details? What about when they're trying to book my comedy shows? Yeah. They're booking my Perth show at the moment, and they said to me, Mitchell, what are you doing in November? How the fuck would I know? I know.

Let's just assume probably nothing. I don't think that far ahead. I agree. They think we have our lives so planned. They go, no, we're going to rebook you for December. Will the 12th work? Yep, it will. Just book it in.

It's like a fucking dartboard. And then you accidentally double book and triple book because you're like, oh, it doesn't ring a bell. It's probably fine. But do you know what I mean? It's just so awkward. And then no one's ever invested. They don't care.

They just want to book in the appointment and fuck you off. I mean, personally, I don't actually go through my family events and, like, I don't read out my calendar. I just go, um, oh, let me look. Just a sec. Oh, actually, is Tuesday okay? I don't read out what I've got on in the calendar. I think that's just you.

Oh, I tell them everything. Yeah, I don't tell them. I'm like, well, it's Mum's 60th and she loves panna cotta. Do you reckon I should get the ricotta cake? Just don't get ricotta. She's got IBS, right? She comes to the same GP. I'm like, you're right, Dr. Sada, be mad.

God, there's just so many people like that, though. I'm going to read you a text exchange I had with Talisha yesterday. Talisha Veskio, big fan of the pod, love her. Former co-host on Not My Cup of Tea, the podcast. I said to her, oh, is this your week off between jobs? And she goes, yes, it is. And I said, gorgeous, let's hang out one day. And she goes, yes, let's.

I'm driving with Emily right now to get a pricing gun for $20 because I'm selling my clothes. Tomorrow night I have my official proper leaving work drinks and this weekend I'm helping my mum with her button sale. And I just replied, why are you telling me any of this? And she goes, I don't know. I just haven't told anyone. So the words fell out and now they're yours.

Oh, that's so beautiful. That's very me. And I've got a lot of friends like that. Yeah. Am I still seeing you Friday night? Yes. Should we see her Friday night? Or is it a button sale Friday night, Delisha?

I don't know. All those words went in one eye, out the other. Is that how it works? Are you reading the message? In one eye, out the other. That's so true works? That's not the answer. If you're reading the message. In one eye, out the other. That's so true. We need to change that. Will it exit in my brain?

We need to change it. That's a good one. In one eye, out the other. Wow. I think you knew what I meant. That'll be me going through the idiot twinks. In one hole, out the other. Oh, my God.

That's my future. What's the other? I don't know. It wasn't even funny. Anyway. Or in one hole and exit the same hole. Yeah, repeatedly. Oh, sorry.

Come on. I'm healing trauma. All right. You ready for yours, Mitch? Yes, I am. Is it just me or? Are you a bit torn about how to feel about the following relationship advice? Oh.

I know this might be a bit toned for me to bring this up when we're talking about your Bit torn about how to feel about the following relationship advice. Oh. I know this might be a bit toned for me to bring this up when we're talking about your breakup. But there was a video going viral on Instagram. You might have seen it. It came from the Tim Ferriss podcast. And he had a guest on called Brene Brown. She's a relationship coach. Love Brene Brown.

I've been listening to podcasts with her in it. Oh, really? Recently. Oh, you're familiar? I am, yeah. Oh, okay. Good. listening to podcasts with her in it. Oh, really? Recently. Oh, you're familiar? I am, yeah. Oh, okay, good. Because she was talking about specifically marriages and how married couples can support each other. But I think the advice can be applied more broadly to friends or podcast

co-hosts, perhaps. So take this into what she said and let me know what you think, because I'm torn. Everyone says marriage should be 50-50. It's the biggest crock of bullshit I've ever heard. It's never 50-50. Yeah. Ever. And so what we do is we quantify where we are. So if Steve comes home and he'll be like, I got 20. Just in terms of energy.

Just energy, investment, kindness, patience. I'm at a 20. And I'll be like, I'll cover you. I got you, brother. I'll pull the 80. Sometimes we come home, which we have done a lot. My mom has been sick. And I'll say, I've got 10. And Steve, like two days ago, said, I'm riding a solid 25. So we know that we have to sit down at the table anytime we have less than 100 combined and figure out a plan of kindness toward each other.

Oh, I love that. Yeah. Because the thing is, a partnership works when you can carry their 20 or they can carry your 20. And that when you both just have 20, you have a plan where you don't hurt each other. Yeah. See, at first, when I first saw that,

I was like, oh, I like that. That's quite helpful. I enjoy that. I sent it to Sean and he goes, oh, I saw this already. That's what I mean. It's kind of blown up this video. Yeah, it's massive. I saw it on TikTok too. Yeah, there quite helpful. I enjoy that. I sent it to Sean and he goes, oh, I saw this already. That's what I mean. It's kind of blown up, this video. It's massive.

I saw it on TikTok too. Yeah, there you go. And I agree. I mean, it resonated with me. I used to think in my early days that if I wasn't getting 100 back, you know, that I was doing something wrong. I used to think, oh, I'm not. And I always used to feel I had to give 100.

But you learn. Obviously, you learn the balance. Well, see, she said that it's all about the communication of where are you at, you know, out of 50, where are you at with your energy and whatever. But then she also said if both of you aren't able to cover each other, if you're both feeling flat, then you have to sit down at the table and figure out a plan of kindness. I mean, can you not think of anything fucking worse?

If you're a 20 out of 50, if you're low energy, can you think of anything worse than sitting at a table and coming up with a plan of kindness? What does that even mean? I know. Kindness journal? Would you have to write notes? I don't even know.

I guess it's individual. But when I sent it to Sean, I was like, we should do that because there's absolutely been days without, you know, communicating it with this method where I just sort of read the room. Yeah, of course. You know, there's been plenty of times where he's been flat out at work, he's exhausted. So I step up, I'm making dinner, I'm doing all the dithering. And then, of course, there's been times where it's the other way around.

And I thought, yeah, that's really helpful. I like that, Brené. Thanks for that. And then I looked at the comments. And a lot of the comments on that video, I was like, oh, actually, this changes things. Why? And a lot of the comments on that video, I was like, oh, actually, this changes things. Why?

One person said, notice that when her husband said he's a 20 and she will carry the 80. However, when she said that she's a 10, he immediately said he's riding on a 25. And that's the problem in relationships that are already in turmoil. It's because one person is ready to step up when they don't want to slash can't, while the other person always gets away with the bare minimum. Oh, yeah. That's true. Now that I relate to. Well, another comment said, this sets a precedent for scorekeeping. And I was like, ooh, I hadn't thought of that.

It's a slippery slope. Because then you could like, I would like to think I wouldn't do this. But I can imagine that would become fodder in an argument. Well, I've stepped up and filled your 20% more than you've done for me. Also becoming complacent, knowing that if – because, you know, let's be real, misery loves company. So if you are miserable, you're depressed, you're at a 20 and you're at a 20 for a week but your partner is giving you an extra 80,

that allows you then to be comfortable to sit in the 20, right? Yeah. I mean people aren't as driven as we want them to be. It's all well and good to say I'll be a 20 until I feel better, then I promise I'll get back to 100. But if you're stuck in a 20 and someone else is giving you 80, I would argue that the majority of people would stay in that rut, stay in that lull because it's comfortable.

They've got it too good. Exactly. See, I was just like, oh, that's beautiful advice, blah, blah, blah. But then now that I've read the comments, I'm starting to see the more cynical side, you know? Yeah. And I'm like, oh, that's beautiful advice, blah, blah, blah. But then now that I've read the comments, I'm starting to see the more cynical side, you know? And I'm like, oh, shit, okay, they all make good points. Although I think the main focus is just the communication about it. Like, okay, where are you at today?

That would be helpful because imagine if you're both on like 10 and then you take it out on each other. Totally. So if you kind of verbalise that we're both feeling shit today, let's be extra nice to each other. I think that's helpful. Yeah. But yeah, as soon as the other partner starts taking advantage of your willingness to step

up and carry them, that's a problem. I also think it's very easy when you're talking about 10s, but you throw in a decimal point. Fuck, I would have to get the calculator out. Babe, I'm a 19.7 today. What have you got? 46.8. I'd be like, hold on, let me get a pen and paper. Yeah, fuck.

So, like, at first I was like, good advice, but now I'm torn. I don't know. Is it good advice or not? I think, no, I think you're right. I think the takeaway from that is communication is 100% the key. Yeah, let them know if you're feeling shit. In this podcast relationship, I think we do a good job. I'll tell you if I'm flat.

Like, actually last week. And also with my brain, my fucking Chiari malformation, I will often say, like, hey, I'm feeling flat. I'm not feeling good. And I'm like, sweet, all good. I got this. And I think, do you reckon that's why we maybe bickered a little bit more in the early days?

Because I don't think we did that. No, I completely agree. Like, we might have both been burnt out as fuck and then just ended up taking it out on each other. Totally. Totally. And so, yeah, I think the advice just about the communication part is helpful.

So does that mean if this podcast was a marriage, we'd be a really healthy grown marriage? I'd like to think so. I agree. And we're open with Jenna. Yeah. Of course. Jenna is. We just fuck Jenna for fun.

Yeah. Jenna's our maid. Yeah. Can you put a little skirt on next episode? It's pretty cute. You're listening to Is It Just Me? Got something on your mind? Hit up at coupleofmitches on Instagram to get yourself on the show.

All right, your chance to get on the show now and have an Is It Just You of your own, or an Is It Just Me of your own. Is it just you? Something you have noticed it just me of your own there is just you something you have noticed something you hate or something that you appreciate there's gotta be something wreck your brain

you'll find something you notice, hate or appreciate and then hit us up and a good tip sometimes Mitch and I get in we're like what the fuck is our idjim and remember that time

that you were like look around the room and then I looked at a box of tissues and that was the idjim yeah I was just holding up random objects being like clocks what are your two cents on clocks? Tissues. You're like, oh, I've got something to say about tissues. I know. That's literally how we get

my nan out of her Lewy body dementia. We like just hold up old photos and old objects. And she goes, clock. Yes, my granddaughter's name's Karen. Yes, it is. All right. Well, today we've got the one and only Carly from Tasmania. Hello, Carly. Hey, guys. How are you? Oh, darling. I'm good. Whereabouts in Tassie are you? Launceston, Tasmania.

Oh, gorgeous. I just visited Launceston. It's stunning. Is it cold at the moment in Tassie? It's pretty cold. I'm sitting with a woolen jacket. I'm actually sitting on a thing of cement outside my work, and it's not very warm, no. Yeah.

What do you do for work? I work for Toyota. Oh, right. Oh, shit. Must be nice, that Toyota cash, huh? It's not bad. It's not bad. It's pretty good.

Do you like living in Launceston? Because I know that visiting and living there, very different things. People say, oh, Forbes is lovely. And I'm like, try fucking living there. It's okay. It's really boring. Like, it's very ordinary, but if you like the quiet life okay. It's really boring. Like, it's very ordinary. But if you like a quiet life and you just like a simple life, it's great.

Everyone's really friendly. Like, I've gone to the mainland and people are just snobs and they're just rude. Wait, do you call Central Australia the mainland? We call Australia the mainland. That's really funny. I didn't know that. I remember when I was in Launceston. This just goes to show how quiet the place is. My friends and I remember when I was in Launceston, this just goes to show how quiet the place is,

my friends and I Googled gay clubs in Launceston and the first thing that came up, the number one recommendation was the Tail Race Park toilet block. That's where you'll find, that's the best cruising spot apparently. Well, a nice little tail race, huh? That sounds exciting. There was a story going on years ago, like in the middle of Lonnie and Hobart,

we have this park called St. Peter's Park. Yeah. The gay people go there to meet at the park to do, you know, the holes in the toilet stalls. Oh, yeah. What did you say that one was called? St. Peter's Park. St. Peter's. This one says Tail Race Park.

So all the parks in Launceston. I love how she says it. The gay people. The gay people with the holes in the wall. That's called a glory hole. It's part of our culture. Glory hole, that's the one. Yeah, there it is.

All right, well, let's get you on for your Is It Just You, something you've noticed you hate or appreciate. Bradley will count you in. We'll get you on. Okay, you ready? Okay, lovely. Thank you. Is it just me or?

Is it really hard to fall in love again after you've been completely destroyed by your ex? Oh, wow. Oh, my God. You take this one, Cherry. Wow. I think, yeah, let's leave it to you. Why don't I give you my personal number? Wait, wait, wait.

Carly, how recent was the breakup with your ex? It was over two years ago, and I'm going to get really depressing here. I'm sorry. No, it's all right. It was two years ago, and I can't love anyone. Like, I can't do it. And, you know, I'm still kind of – I don't want to make your podcast depressing. No, it already is, darling.

We're already there. I mean, I'm on it fucking this week. So talk to me. Did you break up with him three years ago? Did he leave you? So basically, he's Greek. So Greek men are very obsessive, but they're very, what's the word, controlling. Okay.

So we met in 2017. I thought he was my knight in shining armor. Like, you know, I thought he was the one. He was the one. Like, no doubt about it. oh when are you getting married when are you having kids like you know yeah and then about three months into it sadly his father passed away and he just turned in to the most abusive controlling gaslighting person. And I unfortunately stayed with him for another three years. And you know, like, when you're in a relationship or when you look back at one, you're like, oh, I could have done this.

I should have done better. I should have changed this. I can proudly say I did everything in my absolute heart perfectly. There was not one thing that I could have done better to keep that man happy. Yeah, there's only so much you can do. Yeah. And, you know, I stayed for three years and he just controlled me, abused me mentally, emotionally, physically, financially.

If you're struggling with any of the topics we've talked about today, never be afraid to reach out. Call Lifeline on 13 11 14. Oh, I can't even, I can't even explain how bad it was. It sounds a bit Stockholm syndrome-y, though. If you are recognising that he treated you like shit and yet you feel like you're never going to find anyone else, you will and they'll treat you way better than that person

who was going through his own grief, obviously. But that's no excuse. This is the thing you won't understand. I'm in a relationship. Oh. Oh, no. Oh, really? Okay.

Yep. I've got a long-term boyfriend of over a year. But I, and he knows this, like he's accepted it. I cannot love another human like I loved the man starting with G. But here's the thing. That's allowed. You still love your current partner, right? Your new partner.

I do, but nowhere near to the intense. I don't know. That's the thing. I don't think I do. Maybe it's not a case of more or less. It's just a very different kind of relationship. It feels different. Yeah.

Yeah. But, Carly, I think there's got to be an element of you letting go. I mean, you were hurt really, really bad. Yeah. Are you talking to someone? Do you have a therapist? Do you have people to talk to about this? God, I wish.

No, no, no. It's not as bad as it seems, but, you know, after someone hurts you that bad, I don't think that the regular human can love another person the way they did because I sure as hell can't. I respectfully disagree. I think you can. I agree. You can? Yeah. I think you can. I agree. You can?

Yeah, I think you can as well. And I'm here to tell you that, listen, I've just come, as everyone knows, I've come out of a massive relationship that I threw my whole entire life at. And I'm on the path to doing it already. You have to realise that his problems are not your problems. His problems aren't because of you. You can never fix them.

And I can understand the urge that you want to fix them and that's beautiful of you to want to, but you can't really. He's got to work on himself as well. Also, you cannot, you cannot, and this is something that I've had to come to terms with. You cannot keep choosing someone who isn't choosing you. Oh, God, no. There's no point. So just keep saying that over and over in your head because there's no point loving this person. They're not loving you back, Carly. You've got to let go.

It's not about me being in love with them. It's just about me or anyone, male or female. They're not the same person after that last event. I know what you mean. Those things aren't mutually exclusive though, Carly. You can still love him and you can still recognize that you are a different person. You've changed. You've come out of this a different person while still loving him. Two things can be true at the same time.

I'm in therapy at the moment. I've never been in therapy before in my life. Oh, you've just had your first session. I was so proud. I've just had my first session. And can I just say, I'll give you her number. She's fantastic. You've got a weird hat, though. I wanted to take it off. I'm like, pull that give you her number, she's fantastic. I've got a weird hat though, I wanted to take it off.

Pull that fucking thing off! And by the way, when I say he's just had his first session, I mean literally half an hour ago. That's why I'm getting fully philosophical. But listen, we don't need to go into, Carly, your personal details, they're personal, but I suggest going to a therapist just to get it all off your chest, to talk about it and they will give you tactics to start unlearning that unhealthy love bond that you have.

And maybe you'll talk about your future relationship in a less bleak way. Yeah. Also, can I just say, Carly, you sound like you love so hard and your love is such a big part of who you are, right? All I'll say to you, and this is something that I had to do in my breakup with hayden is that you cannot be giving the best parts of yourself because like me the best some of the best traits that i have are my love and how much love i can give and you should not be giving that love to someone who doesn't see the value in it there are people out there that will see that for what it is and value it so and you need to work out how you can put that into your new your new partner and for your own sake, you know?

Yeah. No, I know. I know I'm wasting, because I'm only 31. Like, I'm still young. Yeah. I just, yeah. I feel like it literally is just me. The new guy sounds like a bit of a keeper.

You said he was quite understanding. He, it sounds ridiculous, but he is so pure. Like, he is just an absolute angel. Like, you could not ask for a better person to love you. I like the sound of him. Oh, that's so pure. Like, he is just an absolute angel. Like, you could not ask for a better person to love you. I like the sound of him. Oh, that's so nice. Hold on to him, Kylie. My suggestion is go to a therapist.

Talk this through. Yeah. Okay. You really should. Why are you laughing at the idea of therapy, Kylie? Yeah. I don't want to make your podcast. Like, I don't want to, you know, come on here and be like, oh, you know, I can't love someone

and feel depressed. It's just. Oh, wait, you know, I can't love someone and feel depressed. It's just- Oh, wait till you listen to the rest of the episode, babes. It's very- I was going to say, it's very fucking timely, mate. It fits in. It's fine.

It's all good. And stop apologizing for how you feel. You know? And lots of people feel this way, so it's relatable. I would hazard a guess and say, no, it's not just you, Carly. Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Well, that's good. That's reassuring. Yeah. Comforting, that's good. That's reassuring. Yeah, comforting, I'm sure. We hope that helps. At least you'll get a prize from Prize Keeper Jenna. That'll cheer you up. Thanks, Jenna. You're lovely.

Send her a DM. Oh, fuck, what are we? Jesus Christ. You're amazing. Oh, so lovely and amazing. So are you. Keep in touch, Carly. Thanks, Carly.

I love your podcast. You guys are great. Bless you. We love you too. Go to therapy, okay? Will do. I don't like that she keeps laughing at that. I know.

It just sounds a little bit like we're palming her off. We can't deal with it. Go to a therapist. But no, I can absolutely see that it would help her in that situation. Well, that's very personal and we don't know the ins and outs of it. Well, she was talking very black and white about the situation. She's already come to the conclusion. A therapist can probably unpack that a bit.

Totally. And help her come to a more grounded conclusion. Yeah, agreed, agreed. Well, if you want to get in touch with an Is It Just You, you can text us at? Oh, 0412 712 092. Someone tried to fucking FaceTime that phone this week. Did they?

Yeah, and I was having a cry. Yeah, I don't know if our darling idiots know this, but I used to man the Idjim phone, but then I gave you the SIM card. So more thirsty DMs for you on the way, I bet. Now that they know it's on your phone. Yeah, like a dirty little fucking, yeah, send them my way. Send me the photos, but don't FaceTime me, please. For the love of God.

All right, continuing on our breakup bullshit. More, more. It's going to make me sad again. No, I don't know if it will because you were saying last week, Mitch, that you want to hear more real-life stories about other people's breakups just to give you some sort of guide on how to deal with your own. And now, do you remember back in episode 140, which was about three months ago now?

Oh, I'm not quite. I barely remember Jenna's fucking birthday. Yeah. I've got the audio. I'll refresh your memory. But back in episode 140, we had Sian call in and she was just going through a very, very sudden breakup. This is what she said. A breakup's one of the worst things to go through.

Oh, I can imagine. Yeah. Oh, dear. I was in a relationship with a guy in Darwin for two years. We were doing the whole house thing. We had a life, everything. And then one day he just turns around and he goes, yep,

that's it. And he did it at a pub. At a pub in front of everyone where they could see your reaction. Yeah. He pretty much said to me to leave, pretty much pack my stuff and go to my family in Townsville. You had to drive from Darwin to Townsville? Yeah, it took me four days. Fucking hell.

Oh my God. What was his piss-weak excuse? He didn't give me one. Oh my God, I'm so sorry for you, Sian. That's a bit eerie listening back to that. Yeah. I know because you and I were a bit out of our depth. Like, I don't know how to give breakup advice to this woman.

I know. At that point, all I wanted to say was I'm happily in love, babe. I got no tips for you. I don't know. And so three months on, now that you've announced your breakup, darling Sian slid into my DMs and said, I'd love to have a chat with Mitch. Oh, this is actually really smart.

Yeah, because she's been there, done that. And so three months on, we'll see how Sian is doing because every breakup is unique and different. And we've already kind of said that you're going to go through the motions. There'll be ups and downs for a little bit. And then eventually you'll get to a point where you're like, yeah, nah, I've moved on. I'm over it. We'll see if Sian's at that point.

Oh my God. So we've got Sian's number here? Yeah. All right. Let's dial it out. Does she know we're calling? Yeah. Yeah. I've moved on. I'm over it. I will see if Sian's at that point. Oh, my God. So we've got Sian's number here? Yeah. All right, let's dial it out. Does she know we're calling? Yeah, yeah. I've organised it all. Because imagine if we called and she said,

oh, I'm just at therapy. I'm not doing well. Hello? Sian? Hi, how are you? Good, you're on. Oh, how the tables turn, Sian. Oh, Mitch.

Give me some good news. We just played a little recap of your breakup last time you were on the podcast. And so three months on, how are you feeling, babes? You know what? It comes in waves. And I'm going to be very honest and raw. And it does come in waves. I felt so good for a while.

And then last week, it was like a big brain fog. I had no idea where I wanted to be. I didn't know if I wanted to move back home or if I wanted to be here and that's completely normal. So where are you now? Because where we left off you were now in Townsville. I'm still in Townsville but I was very confused all last week. Had no idea what I wanted to do but that's normal. You go through the ups and the downs of the whole journey. But it's not about me. How are you? Oh, bless you. I'm okay. I'm really sad. I just think for the context, and you know me, like Mitch and Jenna, but

everyone listening knows what I put out there. But I think I've put out that I'm a very romantic loving partner. I put so there. But I think I've put out that I'm a very romantic, loving partner. I put so much of myself into my relationship. And probably to my detriment. You like to be a bit of a caregiver, which like I said before, I can totally understand that because I'm a little bit the same. Yeah, I think I just miss having someone to love. Because so much of my personality is is so giving in that regard

so i'm like oh who do i give it to everyone's like give it to yourself i'm like i don't want it i want to give it to someone else you know it's hard to give that love back to yourself and i'm going through the exact same thing at the moment and how i'm feeling but you miss that it's not so much that you might miss the person but you miss the idea of having someone who's just down to do whatever or is always going to be there. That stability, that safety, you miss that. And I hope you don't mind me saying, Sian, but we didn't speak about this particular part of the story on the podcast

because after we recorded, there was a revelation. Are you happy to talk about that? It got worse. That ex is a dog. It did get to talk about that? It got worse. That ex is a dog. It did get worse. It got very much so worse. So my, who I thought was my best friend, I then found out that she was sleeping with my partner.

Oh my God. And they're now together. That is, that would, now knowing what that feels like, I can't even imagine the hurt that would have gone through your mind. And the rage. The rage and just the self-blame and the anger and the sadness. And you've lost two of the most important people in your life. So how did you heal through that?

You should have given me their address when I was in Darwin, babes. I could have lit a bag of shit in their doorstep. It would have been nice if you answered. I was checking in and seeing how you were liking it. Hey, excuse me. I took all your Darwin recommendations. Mindal Beach Markets, gorgeous. Thank you.

Beautiful, right? Did you watch the sunset? I did, and everyone applauded when the sun set, which was fucking odd. That's a bit odd. Yeah, it's weird. It's backwards up there, mate. But yes, as we were saying, the anger phase. Obviously, this guy that you were dating, Sian, did you very dirty.

And you would think if someone did you so dirty, like people who haven't been through a breakup might assume, oh, well, fuck them, move on. But it sounds like it's easier said than done because the waves are still there three months on. Yeah, it's not that easy. And it's going to take it takes time and mitch you need to be really kind to yourself and i even reached out to you the other day and sent you messages of like it's got you're going to be okay you will you won't you might not see it right now but i'm starting to see it after three months like i've not saying that you're going to move

but i've moved and i've got a whole new support system. I've got a new job. Like I'm putting myself out there and getting involved in social groups and going out more and taking back more of my life. What sort of social groups? I'm going to netball and I'm also pole dancing. Oh my God. Shit.

I did a term of pole. It's quite fun. Oh fuck, I might do a termit pole. Are they like drilled in? Is it a safe pole? It's a safe pole. It's dirty. I've given it a few kicks to check if it comes out, but it's dirty. Oh, that's good advice. I did get

your message. That was very kind. And you know what? I think the reason I know I'm going to be okay in the long run is because I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's just like, fuck. And you know, my I think the reason I know I'm going to be okay in the long run is because I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. It's just like, fuck. And, you know, my therapist said it today. My therapist? I've never said that before.

I know. Who are you? No. It's okay. I know. It's amazing. No, I love it. I love that I have a therapist.

But that I love so hard and I need to then put that love back into myself and not give it to someone who't fucking appreciate it or will throw it back in my face. Yeah. And I did the same thing. I died so heavy and so hard and so fast into this, into my past relationship that I forgot about myself and I let myself go on the back burner. You need to put some love into yourself because you are a beautiful person and you are so kind and you are so generous and you are so genuine and you need to put some love into yourself because you are a beautiful person and you are so kind and you are so generous and you are so genuine and you need to remember those things. Can we talk about something else? No, actually. Too much me.

I don't like it. Another thing I wanted to bring up while we've got you, Sian, is I've actually got the audio of the advice that Mitch gave you at the time. Oh, don't do this. And I want to see how you feel about that advice and now applying it to yourself instead. So wait, Mitch Turi is about to give Mitch Turi advice? Yes. Oh, fuck.

Okay, here we go. So sorry that you're going through this. Yeah, I hope you feel better after a bit of a vent. I do. I do. I do need a vent every now and then and I've had some good cries. Good. Good.

It's a healing process. You're sounding beautiful, young girl. You don't need anyone in your life, just so you know. You really don't. You don't need someone to be fully fulfilled. And I think this is a blessing in disguise. Listen to what you said. You don't need anyone to be fully fulfilled.

Yeah, that's true. Yeah, it is. Good advice from him. Yeah. He's great. He's a wise person. He's a wise person. He's a wise person when he wants to be. I don't want to take my own advice.

I know. And it's hard. I know that I'm giving all of this advice now. I wouldn't have listened to me three months ago. That's a good point. That's actually. But you're now speaking from experience, Sian. Yeah.

But at the end of the day, sorry for stuttering, but I'm trying to get all my words out. You need to be kind to yourself and give yourself time. Let yourself grieve because it is a grieving process. It's like a death. And my auntie said that to me literally a couple of days ago because I was crying hysterically on the phone to her because I was like, have I made the wrong choice?

And should I just put up with it? And she goes, no, like, let yourself grieve. It's normal because you are now mourning someone that you knew and you now won't know them moving forward. Do you know what I mean? I know. I know. It's also hard when like you thought you knew someone and then it's like things happen and

you go, oh my God. And now they're a different person. Completely different. But then you're also still in love with the potential of that person. Like what you thought they could be. Like once I said, I don't want to, I've said it before.

I want to bring my dirty laundry on the pod just yet. But, um, yeah, no. And that's, you do that in your own time or you don't. And it's no one else's really,

it's no one else's business. It's your choice. If you disclose that with anybody else. Yes. Oh, and I will be doing it for a Patreon episode. $1,000 for the full unedited tea on the relationship. It'll be an hour-long unedited exclusive. $1,000 per listener.

Yep. Tracy Grimshaw's coming out of retirement to be the narrator. And it's not like Netflix. You can't leech off someone else's purchase. You'll have to pay a grand each. Yep, correct. There's a unique password per listen. And Jenna also won't turn up to that.

No. Oh, that is so kind. Very good advice. It's true. Fuck you. This was like reverse psychology bullshit on me. It's good. Well, you've just used my own advice against me.

It's a head fuck. But you've got to remember, like I kept saying, you've just got to be kind to yourself because I'm trying to be as kind as I can to myself and I destroy myself on some days, honestly. I beat myself up about it, but it happens. Go out and spend time with your family. Lean into them.

Lean into Mitch and Jenna and all of your other friends. It's okay to be dependent on those other people during this time. Have you out of interest been with anyone else since? No, and I don't want to. Yeah, you're not there yet. I'm not. Yeah, definitely. I couldn't possibly imagine moving on so quickly after such a big relationship.

Wouldn't that be a dumb, disgusting, and to be perfectly honest, self-destructive thing to do? Absolutely. Yeah, but that's what, some people do that. Like my idiot ex-partner, he's done it. Oh, yeah. But he will just repeat the same, people like that. I'll never heal.

They just repeat the same behavior. Of course. They never heal. I'll never heal. No. I'll never heal. So let yourself have that time. You do it in your own time.

No one can force you. I will. Thank you, Sian. I'm glad you're on the right track. And you know what? Get yourself a second fucking prize. Did we give you a prize the first time? No.

Jenna! Jenna! She cried about her man leaving her and you didn't give her a fucking pop socket? Okay, I'll get you a mug and a few pop sockets. Yeah, you get more than one prize this time. That's dreadful, Jenna. That's not why I come on here. Oh, sure get more than one prize this time. Yes, yes. That's dreadful. That's not why I come on here. Oh, shush, we know.

We know. That's not why I love people as well. Oh, shush, we know. I don't know you personally. I don't. No, I feel like you do. But I do genuinely care a lot about you. Oh, ditto, Sian. We're both narcissists behind closed doors and you'd hate us if you knew us. Me too, it's fine.

It's a joke. All right, Sian. I was just about to wrap it up like I'm wrapping up a guest. Sian Wetby, everyone. You can catch her. Yeah, you can catch her nightly from nine on the project. What is Sian's credit line? What's your credit line, Sian?

What do you want to plug? I'm sure you make something. Is there a small Etsy business there? No, nothing. No, I work in employment services and I go home to my dog. That's about it. All right. What's your dog's name?

Finn. Finn? He's a cadoodle. Hamish. Hamish, yes. Maybe you guys should date. Yeah. We'd be the perfect date.

We said this in the last episode when I was on Last Time. Did we? What did we do? I swear we did. When Mitchell was like, oh, maybe I'll just turn straight to Sian and we'll get married. Oh, wow. Really? You weren't even fucking single then and you were offering yourself up on a platter.

You whore. No. Did Mitchell say that or did I? No. Oh, God. I always get the Mitchells and the Mitch confused. Curie. Oh, I see.

Did I? Maybe I knew something. Maybe it was a Freudian slip. Yes. You do. And I laughed. And I thought it was hilarious. It's a funny joke, but you don't have a penis, Sian. do, and I laughed and I thought it was hilarious. Funny joke, but you don't have a penis, Sian.

Unfortunately, it wouldn't work. No, I know, I know. Oh, well. Alright, thank you, Sian. You're the best. This was lovely. We'll get you a prize. Sending you lots of love, okay? Thank you. DM Jenna. Love you, darling. Oh, well done, Mitch. That was very nice. Yeah, that was so good. Now, Jenna. This was during

her extended absence, and when she came back, I was like, are you on top of everything? All the prizes? She was like, yep was so good. Now, Jenna. This was during her extended absence. Of course. And when she came back, I was like, are you on top of everything, all the prizes? She was like, yep, all good. Lies. Jenna, that's unacceptable. Sure, we forgot your birthday, but you forgot heartbroken Sian's prize. Yes, well.

That was the only light at the end of the tunnel for her at the time. I know, but, you know, she got over it. All right. Guys, that's very sweet. Can I just say, I don't want to make every episode for the next couple of weeks about me. I don't like it. Well, do you want me to talk about myself for a bit? I've got a holiday yarn for you.

Is it boring? No, it's going to be great. All right. You know what? Even if it is boring, it'll help me get through it. Is it just me? You can follow the show online. Just search Couple of Mitches.

If you don't, you're a dickhead. So, you know how I've just had my gorgeous Northern Territory trip a couple of weeks ago? Yes, that looked amazing. That looked beautiful. It was beautiful. I wish I got to stay longer. It was kind of over before it began.

It was such a whirlwind. So there was a few days in Darwin, one of Sean's cousins getting married, and that was stunning. Loved Darwin. And then we flew to Alice Springs to then drive to Uluru because in my mind I was like, well, while I'm in the Northern Territory, I'll just see all the sites they have to offer.

Like what does the Northern Territory have to offer? Darwin and Uluru, that's pretty much it. Yeah. They're not very fucking well connected, those two landmarks. I tried to book a flight from Darwin to Uluru. Yeah. And it was like 16 hours. I was like, what the fuck?

Why is it going to take that long? Because you have to go via Sydney or Melbourne. You can't fly direct. Are you kidding? Wait, really? Yeah. There's only like four places in Australia you can fly direct to Uluru. Yeah, but hold on.

That checks out because Darwin isn't really near Uluru. But I just thought, hi, I'm running Northern Territory Tourism. What do people want to be able to do easily? Go to the capital city, go to the rock. We'll make a little streamline that process for them. I need to get a map up. I'm confused. So where were you at Darwin?

Darwin, then Uluru. Even if they had a weekly service, like something. Well, there was like 30-hour coach services that you could get at fucking 4 a.m. No, Mitchell, they're so far away. I know, but I just thought that they would have worked to connect them, being the two main selling points of the Northern Territory. Anyway, that's the hill I'll die on. I've just thought that as well.

That's the Ayers Rock I'll die on, that they should be easily connected. And so instead we flew to Alice Springs and then drove to Uluru. Yes. And by the way, the drive to Uluru, this isn't that funny. It's actually a bit grim. Yeah. Five hour drive, including piss breaks. Yeah.

You're on that highway that has no speed limit. So it's very fun. Oh shit. Yeah. It's very, there's remote and then there's fuck remote. Like there wasn't even radio signal, let alone phone reception. Oh God, that's scary. Like serial killers.

Yeah. When you did that thing on the car to scan the radio, it picked up nothing, AM or FM. No phone signal. So I was like, if there's an emergency, we're fucked. But anyway, so it was a little unnerving, but also fun. But as you got to the last hour of the trip, there were little points where the highway would go over a little hill and you could see Uluru in the distance. Oh, beautiful.

And at every single one of those hills, there was a flipped car. What do you mean? Because people are obviously going, on this highway with no fucking speed limit, oh, look, there's Uluru. Oh, no. Oh, they crash. Because there was a slight bend in the highway.

Oh, no. And I was like, that's fucking so grim. A couple of them looked fresh too. I was like, Sean, are there bodies in there? Like, there wasn't. We did check. But, yeah, every single slight hill on the highway where Sean, are there bodies in there? There wasn't. We did check. But yeah, every single slight hill on the highway where you could see the rock in the distance, flipped car. Oh my God, that's really bad.

I know, right? It's so scary. I was like, I might slow down a bit. Just check in the window, babe. Yeah, exactly. But anyway, before we even hit the highway in Alice Springs, when we first flew in, it was like nine in the morning. And we couldn't pick up our hire car until 10.30. So we had an hour and a half to kill at the airport.

And Sean found some of those dreadful massage chairs that you often see in Westfield. Oh, now I'm so with Sean. These things are great. What? I love these massage chairs. I went to the Easter show this year and sat one for half an hour. Oh my God. Yeah, but they don't work.

No, but it's a bit... I like the idea of it. Get off it, you two. They're fine. I'm team Sean. Good on him. I don't know what it is. Anyone that came to my comedy show last year,

I did a whole fucking rant about how I feel about those massage chairs. Did you? They're just so off. And also, to Jenna's point, they don't even work. No, they don't. No, they're not great. I will say that. I think if you've got one in the comfort of your home, fine.

Yeah. But going up to a little fucking coin-operated massage chair, God knows who the fuck else has been there. That's exactly it. Yeah. You put a $2 gold coin in there and then, yeah. And also just you sitting there jiggling in public with people around you. And so, anyway, we land and we've got time to kill.

Sean goes, I'm going to use the massage chair. And I was like, oh, my God. Frankly, I don't want to be seen with you, so I'll wait at the luggage carousel. I'll get our bags. And then I came back. He's still fucking jiggling away in the massage chair. Was it a big black leather one that does the ankles as well?

Yes, yes. He was like, this is a bit of a death trap. I couldn't get out if I wanted to. Oh, Sean. I was like, well, that's your bed. You sleep in it. Anyway, after like 12 minutes, the massage chair was over and I was like, well, now what? We've still got plenty of time to kill. And I thought, all right, I don't know. I'll bloody give it a go. Because in all fairness, I've used those chairs when people actually own them, if there's one in someone's lounge room, but I've never used one in public. So I was like, all right, I'll give it a go.

Fuck, I hope no one sees me. And so I did it and it was awful. It was fucking awful. It was completely stabbing my shoulder blades. Yeah, it's like three balls on a rotator cuff, just rotating in a clockwise position for an hour. I was more tense after the fact than I was before I got the massage. And so I thought, okay, this is horrific. Anyway, eventually the time comes to get the hire car. I'm outside putting all the luggage and stuff in.

Sean's still inside the airport fucking around with the forms and whatever. And then Sean comes out to the car and goes, here, hands me a note. I said, what's this? And he goes, oh, some guy in the airport just handed it to me and said that his best friend is a big fan of yours and it would make her day if you would follow her. And I was like, oh, so he's not a fan? He recognised me and then personally couldn't care less. But I was like, oh, okay.

I think you might actually know the person, by the way, because the Instagram handle, she works in radio in Adelaide. In Adelaide? Yeah. Lauren Davo. She works at Fresh. Oh, yes. She works at Fresh.

She's a breaking announcer at Fresh. I don't know her, but I know her through the industry. Yes. Well, there you go. So it was her. It was her Instagram handle. And one of her besties that just happened to be at Alice Springs Airport handed Sean a note and said, Mitchell should follow her back.

And so I did. I said, hi, Lauren. Your best mate reckons I should give you a follow, so hi. And then she sent me a screenshot of the text exchange. Between her and her friend? Mm-hmm. Okay. What was it?

Well, I was sprung in the massage chair. Oh, no. The friend took a photo of you. Well, there's no photo of me in the massage chair, thank God. There is a photo of me waiting at the luggage carousel. Look at you. You look like such a bitch. I know, I do.

Because I'm so embarrassed by Sean in the chair. I'm like, I'll go get the bags. Look at the arm. Mitch's arm is on his hip. You're death staring someone, side-eyeing airport security. You're like a mother looking at your children misbehaving. I think I might have just had an itchy love handle, to be fair. I don't know if the hand on hip is sassy.

Your pins look good. Your legs are nice. Thank you. They do look good. And so you look at the text, and a lot of it is actually complimentary. The best friend said, the luscious locks in a scrunchie. What a vibe. That's nice.

I appreciate that. And then the best friend says, the guy he's with has hopped straight into a communal $2 massage chair Bold choice in Alice Springs So she sent me that screenshot Funny And then because for some reason I'm so humiliated At the thought of being sprung in one of these chairs I lied

And I said, oh, Sean loves them I wouldn't be caught dead in one of those chairs Right She then sends a second screenshot and says, one of you is lying then because the best friend who was spying on me says, now Mitchell's jumped in the chair next to him. Oh, no. They're both fully reclined in massage chairs at Alice Springs Airport.

And I was like, oh, fuck. How embarrassing. You've been dobbed on. I have been dobbed on. That's character assassination. You should sue him. Yeah. And then I said, no, no, I wasn't using the massage chair.

I was just sitting on it. It wasn't on. I was just waiting for Sean. Lying. Lying. Oh, yeah. I don't know why I was so embarrassed at the thought of someone seeing me in this massage chair.

Mitchell, you need to let go of that. Well, when I was in the fucking chair, I was like, this is so humiliating. I hope no one's looking at me. Thankfully, Alice Springs is not the busiest airport. I did look over to my left and there was one guy sitting there and I was like oh he's on his phone. He's not looking at me. Thank fuck. Little did I know he was narrating what I was doing. This guy that I spotted and I went oh thank fuck he's not looking at me. He was. Word for word Mitch's calf is now being

stretched out and they're on his bilateral rotator cuff. Mitch just shouted and it echoed across the tarmac. This is shit! You know what's funny? If you've been to Mitch's house, he's got a massager in his living room. Yeah, it's weird that I'm so adverse to the chairs, but I've got every other form of massager ever. You've got a Mitch's house, he's got a foot massager, he's got a shoulder massager that you've got

to plug in. It's got heat element in it. It's amazing. He's got one of those vibrators with multiple attachments like the guns. Oh yeah, I've got one of them too. Oh really? Yeah, I've got a few. You wanted to got heat element in it. It's amazing. It's got one of those vibrators with multiple attachments like the guns. Oh, yeah. I've got one of them too. Oh, really? Yeah. I've got a few. I wanted to borrow that.

Yeah, they do. Interesting. They do look very phallic though. Oh, it's kind of funny. You've also got a tub full of fidget toys. Yeah. And did they not go down a treat at the house party? I loved them.

I was handing out fidget toys to all my guests and they were so de-stressed. They were. I felt like I was walking to Jojo Siwa's mansion. It's just like tubs of fidget toys of all different colours. I felt like I was walking to Jojo Siwa's mansion. Just like tubs of fidget toys of all different colours. I'm like, do I get a bow for my quiff as well? I could have given you the scrunchie. Oh, I could have.

Yeah. Interesting. Well, Mitchell, you need to let go of the inhibitions. Relax where you want to relax. Don't worry. I won't be relaxing in one of those chairs again. No, no. They're just awful. Terrible.

I know what I'm going to get you for your birthday. Don't you dare. I'm going to drop them. It's fine. You just awful. Terrible. I know what I'm going to get you for your birthday. Don't you dare. I'm going to drop them. It's fine. You'll forget. Fuck off. All right, guys. Let's go.

Let's get out of here. Yeah, we better. I'm glad you told that story. It's nice. I'm going to pepper through my breakup stuff. But also, fuck, I've got to keep some things personal. What if I get sued by the prick? Why would you get sued by the prick?

You haven't said anything defamatory. No, of course not. Yet. That Patreon's coming! Tracy just texted me. Miss Grimshaw, so excited to blow him up. Wow. Wow, wow, wow, wow. Thanks for listening, everyone. Five stars. If you want to leave us a review, that'd be

nice. On Spotify, on Apple, you can write one if you've never written one before. Can I get some nice messages about my life-threatening cold? Yes. And then Jenna's narcissistic qualities. Maybe tell her that she'll be okay. And my birthday as well. Did you get many birthday... No.

No, no. I saw them in the group. People saying, I'm so sorry for what happened to me. And also, happy birthday, Jenna. That was very nice. Already, it's great. They did a thread of dogs to cheer me up. Yeah, that was lovely. Very nice. Okay, we're going to be back next week. Thank you for the kind messages. Thank you for listening. We adore you. Already it's a great, they did a thread of dogs to cheer me up. Yeah, that was lovely. It was very nice. Okay, we're going to be back next week. Thank you for the kind messages.

Thank you for listening. We adore you. And I will just say, how fucking good is the community, the little, the enduring idiots, the idiots. Oh, the most beautiful idiots you've ever met. We love them. Couldn't do it without you. See you in a week. See you, dogs.

Bye. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to AD Debrief. This is our secret segment on the end. We pretend the show's done, but it ain't.

We just talk shit here. Nothing planned. I'm not springing any emotional calls on you, don't worry. Thank fucking God. Have you noticed what's on my face? Have you seen it? The pimple patch? Yes. Oh, it's very subtle. It's quite close to you in the lift. That's the only reason I saw it. Damn it. Have you noticed it, Jenna? I can't see it from here.

I noticed. Yeah, I can see it from here. It's because the light's shiny. Is amplifying it? Yeah. They're new to me. Like, you see them on TikTok. You put them on and then it's like this one. It sucks all the pus out. But then this one doesn't do it. It just sort of sits on there.

Yeah, I sometimes use them. They work? Well, the next day they're... Smaller. They're better. What about my mate that runs the pimple patch? Instagram. Oh, yeah.

Patch Project AU. They're like little stars. Yeah. So people just think that you're being extra and glam. Thank you. You got me on them. Yeah. Yeah, use those. That'll cover your zit. They're really good. Give them a shout out. Pimple patch on think that you're being extra and glam. Thank you. You got me on them. Yeah. Yeah, use those.

That'll cover your zit. They're really good. Give them a shout out. Pimple Patch on Insta if you want to have a look. Oh, no. Patch Project AU. Sorry, sorry. Pimple Patch has confidently guessed it.

I think Pimple Patch might be taken. Yeah. By literally any other Pimple Patch business. Pimple Patch. A Pimple Patch company sponsored my radio show and the credit line was, the pimple spot that clears your dots. I'm like, it doesn't quite work, does it? It's missing something.

What about the pimple patch that cleans your snatch? Can you get pimples on your snatch, Jenna? I'm not saying do, can. Probably ingrown hairs. Yeah, of course. I think so. I can't be sure, though. No.

Should we? I personally haven't, but that doesn't mean others haven't. You're very clean. I've had a pimple on my arse cheek, so can't be sure, though. No. Should we? I personally haven't. Yeah. But that doesn't mean others haven't. You're very clean. I've had a pimple on my ass cheek, so I'm sure it's possible to get them anyway. Oh, yeah. I get bed sores the amount of sitting I do.

What's a bed sore? When someone's really gravely ill and they can't get out of a hospital bed, they develop open wounds because they can't move. Yeah. What? It was just a joke. I don't have bed sores. I'm okay.

I'm Googling that. Open wounds because they can't move? Just. What? It was just a joke. I don't have bed sores. I'm okay. I'm Googling that. Open wounds because they can't move? Just Google bed sores. Bed sores. You know, everyone's like, I bet you're stuck in bed at the moment. I go, no. No. I'm working.

I'm very busy. I wish I was stuck in bed. I haven't watched the latest three episodes of Drag Race and I miss it. Well, that's partly why I decided to come into the office today. I nearly worked from home, but I thought, no, I'll be selfless and I'll infect Mitchell so that he has an excuse to stay at home and bed rot. Oh, that's lovely. I've got to start packing soon.

I've got to move in two weeks. What? Yeah. I didn't know you had a place lined up. I don't want to announce where I'm moving yet because it's not locked in. Turn the mics off and tell me. Yeah. Oh, that sounds dreadful.

No, don't. It's the right choice. No, no. You're making the right choice. And it's going to be nice. It's going to be really nice. Bolting. Oh, my God, it's bougie.

I'll talk about that soon. Why is there an embargo on your move? Channel 7, because it's part of Domestic Blitz, want to announce it first on their Twitch stream with Katrina Roundtree. Yes, of course. Because they're doing breakups. I used to love domestic blitz. Is it just me on the fly?

Or bring back domestic blitz. Is that the same as backyard blitz? No, domestic blitz was for the people that were very, very ill. Oh, really? People that were not long left. With bed sores. With bed sores, and they'd go and renovate their house. In retrospect, nothing I'd want more than if I was in palliative care to have a tradie shitting in my spare toilet.

I have no memory of that. Google it. You'll know it. I don't remember them focusing. I remember backyard blitz for sure. Yeah, I remember that. But I don't remember them doing it for gravely ill people. Domestic blitz was exclusively grave people.

I remember one episode, they brought them back in a stretch limo and the woman took a month to get out of the car. She was awful. Do you remember Gorilla Gardener? Ooh. Sounds familiar. If there's a bit of an eyesore, like a disgusting alley, they'd just go in there in the dead of night and make it really pretty.

Oh, in Sydney? Yes. There's some Gorilla Gardener artwork that I see on the way to Entertainment Quarter. Yes, it's in Surrey Hills. All in Maloo as well. Yes, you're so rightrilla gardener artwork that I see on the way to Entertainment Quarter. Yes, it's in Surrey Hills. And they did it all in Wallamaloo as well. Yes, you're so right. Oh, I forgot about that.

That was a great show. That's the little car with the roundabout. Isn't that funny that that's stuck around and it's such an iconic part of culture now? I forgot about it. We should probably, sorry, my throat's fucked. We should probably end the breakup episode. Yeah. By talking about breakup song recommendations.

Oh, my goodness. Or is that more of a main show thing? I think that's a main show thing. The top five. I mean, haven't I shown you? Mitch, I've shown you my playlist, right? Jennifer, have I shown you my playlist? No.

Are any of the songs that I recommended in that playlist? Let me get them up for you. So these are the recommendations Mitchell sent to me, which I was shocked. I should have come to you sooner, Mitchell. I don't know why I had so many ready to go. Yeah. Bring that one up on YouTube. Which ones?

There was one of them that wasn't an Apple Music link, which, by the way, I don't even fucking have Apple Music, but for your convenience, I was searching these breakup songs and sending the Apple link. Oh, that's very sweet. I know. I'm an Apple music boy. It was called Lost On You by LP, but the live version is much better. It's a bit yeehaw.

I don't mind a yeehaw moment. Anyone going through a breakup, this is for you. Lost On You, LP. When you get older plainer, saner will you remember all the danger we came from? I don't know what the sheep does with salt. Like embers falling tender

longing for the days of no surrender years ago. Bear with us, it gets better. And will you know? So smoke them if you got them, cause it's Bear with us, it gets better. Let's raise a glass or two to all the things I've lost on you. Oh, tell me I've been lost on you. Oh, just as you could cut me loose. Also how talented.

She's also got an egg shaker in hand. I know. Essential contribution. Oh. Gorgeous. Someone says 347. No matter how many times I listen, this part gives me goosebumps. Oh, go to that.

I mean, look, you've got to be in the headspace for this. I did Peloton to this song like a week ago. Did you? Yeah. Oh, were you not in the headspace for this? No, no, I was, but I'm just prefacing it for other people. Okay. What other songs did you send me? I've got one. This is great. The gaysspace for this. No, no, it was, but I'm just prefacing it for other people. Okay. What other songs did you send me?

I've got one. This is great. The gays will love this. Which one? This is my current breakup album. Oh, this is quite perfect. It is, yes, yes, quite perfect, Renny. You'll know it as soon as it starts. Oh, yes.

Very you, Mitchell, too. Very angry phase appropriate. Uh-huh. Lady Gaga, Perfect Delusion. It wasn't love. It wasn't love. It was a perfect delusion. Oh, me in my car every fucking morning.

It's getting me angry, guys. This is not a good idea because I'm going to get mad. Oh, delusion. Why don't you go to bed? I didn't get mad. Why don't you go to bed? I don't know. If you've had it on repeat, you thought you would have absorbed some of it. No, no. It's so stupid.

I also sent you You Oughta Know by Alanis Morissette. That's a good one. Oh, that's a great one. But this is for the angry phase. I've also got more recommendations per phase. Everyone do it together. Let's all three of us. Ready? Ready?

This is so cathartic. Leave me alone. Oh, that was really good. Not the yodelling being on point. Oh, my God. This is really helping. I would have loved to have sang with you, but my voice is fucked. Sorry. Of course.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, can I just say one? Mitch, I think you'll like this. Yeah.

This is brilliant. Do you know this song? What? Angel Eyes. Yeah. Angel Eyes by ABBA. I don't know if I've heard this ever. Okay, you'll get it.

Ready? Ready? Ready? Keep thinking about angels Keep thinking about When I lay in a lung around the river And I saw him together with a young girl And the look that he gave her made me shiver Because he always used to look at me

Look at me that way Bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-bow-wow-bow-bow-wow-bow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow-wow- How about breakup songs? Like what? Knowing Me, Knowing You. Oh, yeah. Let me get that. Or Winner Takes It All. Oh. S.O.S. Oh, you're right. I haven't got across any of those. I'm adding this right now while it plays. Is this good for the wallowing phase?

Yeah. Wow. Ready? Oh shit, we're heading too close behind here. Yeah, I'm definitely still in the angry phase. There is nothing we can do Knowing me and knowing you We just have to face it this time This time we Breaking up is never easy Can I just say, I don't know if it's a pro or a con,

I feel it's a pro of going through a breakup that songs like this just hit different. They do, you're so right. I feel it's a pro of going through a breakup that songs like this just hit different. They do. You're so right. You're actually so right. I enjoyed it. Even though it was only, you know, like I said last week, I dated a douchebag for two months in uni and I still felt songs like that hit way harder.

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Well, five years. It was kind of nice. Yeah. That's a little too close to home. Sorry. No, no, no.

I should have proofread it. No, no, no, no, no. I should have proofread it. No, no, no, no, no. I'm definitely. What about this bit? What happens? Memory. Memory. Good day.

Good day. Bad day. Oh. These are our phone calls. Am I whispering or are you? Me just reiterating everything you said. You're like, I'm having a bad day. Bad day.

Okay, enough ABBA. Enough ABBA. Let's start a breakup playlist. That'd be nice. That'd be very nice. God, I'm very open and raw. That's actually what I had a psychic. That's what he said.

Stop it. I had a psychic reading from John Edward. Really? The big dog. He was on my radio show and he was reading other people. Then at the end, he's like, Mitch, can I ask you, are you 27, 28? I'm 28. He said, yeah, your Saturn's returning. And I was like, what is that? And Saturn comes in seven year cycles, like the orbit of Saturn around Earth. And this year is my Saturn return, which means that- Is that a good or a bad thing?

Horrific. Massive changes. Massive, massive changes. Oh, so massive changes isn't a bad thing? I will send you the audio because there's some things that you and I know. Really? Oh my God. Really?

I got a psychic reading too. When? At the Mindle Beach Sunset Market in Darwin. Oh my God. Just like Sian recommended. Did you talk about this? Or just privately? You told me privately.

I don't know if we spoke about it. I don't know. I voice memoed it in case there was anything good in there to play on the podcast. But I obviously, I haven't gone back to it. So maybe there wasn't anything decent. The long story short was that they said that I'm going to get a lot of work on cruise ships as an entertainer. And that Sian is going to discover his passion for sewing inside a clothing line and we're going to adopt two children.

And she specified neither of them are white. Wow. That's what a detail. It was very specific. That's impressive. And I said, what about the podcast I'm working on? Oh, yeah. And she goes, stick with it.

It's good for you. But one day you're going to be too busy for it with all the cruise ship entertaining and clothing lines you're running and you're too black. I was like, okay. I'm sure I could juggle the podcast in amongst all that. I can take my mic on the cruise. We've got a portable studio. Yeah. We can make it work.

Yeah. She also said, has your grandmother passed? I said, no, neither of them. She goes, well, then who's this old woman talking to me? I was like, I don't know. You tell me. What do you mean? She goes, who's this old woman talking to me?

She's watching over you. I was like, who? Who's this sick bitch that I don't know watching over me? She's just stalking you. You've got to stalk her from beyond the grave. Michelle. An old woman. But did she say, by the sounds of it, she was annoyed.

Can you tell? Who is she? She won't leave me alone. Nothing to do with you. Just can you help? I could not think of anyone that it could have been. She goes, she's telling me that you two were very close. And I'm like, well, that doesn't narrow it down at all.

Because there's plenty of old women I know that are dead. But I wasn't close to any of them. She's telling me she loves your videos. She loved the Lisa Wilkinson hair one. She died the day after that came out. Wait, do you know any old women that have died? Yeah, like my great grandmother who I met once on her deathbed. But you weren't close to her.

No. There was my piano teacher. She died. But she was only 50 or 60. It was a tragic death. Suddenly? Well, cancer, but yeah. It's tragic, yeah. Were you close with your piano teacher?

Well, she was closer with my sister. I was more the annoying brother that didn't actually like piano, so the poor thing trying to make me focus. Imagine. Could have been her. Yeah, but is she close enough to stalk you? There have been times over the years, like when I discovered masturbation, that I've thought, fuck, I hope Mrs. Dunn isn't watching from heaven.

You know how you have those intrusive thoughts where you're like, if it's true that people watch over us when they're dead, I hope they're not watching right now. But don't they say they're not like in their human form? They're like an orb floating or something? Their spirit. Yeah. This bloody lady at the market specifically said, they're not like in their human form? They're like an orb floating or something? Their spirit. Yeah. This bloody lady at the market specifically said,

they're watching over you. The weird thing was that I sat down and she goes, you're an entertainer, aren't you? I was like, that's debatable. Depends who you ask. You are. And she goes, I knew it. I was like, how could you tell?

And she goes, well, you're recording me right now in secret, aren't you? And I was like, oh, shit, which I did have a voice memo going. Did you put your phone face down on the table? No. It was in your pocket. And she knew. I sort of like had it in my hand with the pop sock. I didn't really put it away.

Interesting. But I was very subtle not to show her the screen. And so she thought, so who's your piano teacher? Mrs. Dunn. She never, she just said some old bitch is watching over me. She didn't really narrow down on that because I said, I've got no idea who that is. But is she, so how old would she be now? She wouldn't be that old though. I want to say like 70s maybe.

But like I picture like a 90 year old. Nah. How old was she when she passed? I think it was only 50s or 60s. Mrs Dunn, if you're in this room now, make it known. She's here! She taught me the keyboard, not the honky tonk. She's haunted and she's pissed off.

She never paid for the last bill. I don't think she is. She had to politely ask my mum, stop bringing Mitchell. He clearly doesn't give a fuck about learning piano. He's so ADHD. He's all over the shop. Mrs Dunn, what was the last song you taught Mitchell on the keyboard? It was

When the Saints Go Marching In. Sorry. Shopsticks? Really? Wow. If you played When the Saints Go Marching It, I would have been very freaked out. Oh, no. She said, oh, but I'm getting her. Sorry.

She's coming through to me. She says this is the one song that he wishes he'd learned. Inside of my head. What's that? I don't know. Mrs Dunn says you wanted to play Monster. By Rihanna. A song that hadn't been released when I was learning piano.

You know what song I've always, always, always wanted to just have up my sleeve as a party trick? I just take everyone by surprise and start playing it at a party and blow everyone away. The Thomas the Tank Engine theme song. Bring that up on YouTube. Just an and start playing it at a party and blow everyone away. The Thomas the Tank Engine theme song. Bring that up on YouTube. Just an actual person playing it on the piano. It's so impressive. It's got a real hefty bass to it. And it's a great breakup song.

Imagine everyone at the house party going can you play piano? I would be so impressed. I've seen like, all of a sudden I'm on Thomas the Tank Engine cover talk because the amount of fucking piano covers I see of the Thomas the Tank Engine theme song because they know that that's my dream. If only Mrs Dunn were here to teach me. Oh, stop it.

She's here. Mrs Dunn, get in here, bitch. That sounds just like her doorbell. I'd love to play this on that piano. Ready? Phantom of the Opera. The worst musical ever. What?

Phantom of the Opera is a masterpiece. Andrew Lloyd Webber. Is a master. Hard worst musical ever. Phantom of the Opera is a masterpiece. Andrew Lloyd Webber is a master. You could nail that, actually. It's one note. Oh, this one. I think I can play this on the piano.

I'm sure you could. It's pretty simple. Oh, hello. Anyway, a special shout out to that fuckhead that said the podcast is too long. Can you not edit anything this week? I don't plan to. You don't need to edit much. A lot of people often ask if they can, podcasts film the whole show these days, which we film the whole show, but they put the whole show up.

I started putting videos on my YouTube channel just as an experiment. Of our podcast? Yeah. Have you? Yeah, I haven't promoted them yet because I want a few up there. Like shorts? Oh, like 12-minute videos. You're kidding.

I didn't know that. Can I get one up? Yeah, if you want. What's your – Mitchell Coombs. So far all I've put is Ladybug Part 1 and 2. Brilliant. We look gorgeous in 16 by 9 widescreen. Really?

Oh, that's my favourite angle. Yeah. Hold on, can you change the screen so I can see it too? Oh, yeah, so sorry. You're right. Oh, my God, I love this. Everyone, like, subscribe, head to my channel. Wow, we should have announced this.

Or is this like a beta test? I was just putting them up there as a test. And then once there's a few up there. Hey, I've got a moral conundrum. I need your two cents on here. Okay. So if you keep looking a close eye on my Instagram, We've got a moral conundrum. I need your two cents on here. Okay. Now we're just listening to ourselves. If you're closing a close eye on my Instagram,

you would know that I'm currently in my walking era. I've got you muted, unfortunately, but I can imagine it's fun. Well, I'm making it known that I'm in my walking era. This is how people listen to our podcast. I really was not going to do these steps. And I was like, right, okay, I need to fucking up the ante here. I got a notification the other day saying not do this. I'm sorry, but that was weird.

What? Listening to us as if we're not us. Oh, Jenna's stuffing her gob with popcorn, fat bitch. It was pig week. Oh, it was? Sorry, it was pig week. Oh, yeah, I did notice that Jenna just had all this food on the desk in front of her in this video,

and we never addressed it. Go to Jenna's angle. We just beat you cut to her. She doesn't- What a pig. That's the just beat you cut to her. She doesn't speak. What a pig. That's the funniest thing I've ever seen. Jenna's got a handful of sweet and salty popcorn,

an open jar of Pringles, a Push Pop, and then Cadbury chocolate binkies. They're all open. And we never address them in this video. All open. People on YouTube just think that Jenna is pre-diabetic. And you're hunched. You're so excited.

Jen's like, oh, that's really funny. Well, there you go. Head along to my YouTube channel if you want to watch videos in full. I'll post a few more. Okay, please do. Should I upload your breakup announcement as a video? Let's not for the time being. I'm sure you can do something else. Okay, shall we go, guys?

Sure. I hope this pod... We hope this podcast made you feel at least 3% better today. That's all. So we do. Oh, you're out of practice. Do that again. So we do. That was also a bit out of sync. One more time. Go, Jenna. Okay. So we do. Oh, she's back!

Mrs. Barton! Take us out, Mrs. Dunn. Take us out, Dunnies! Catch you next week, guys. Love ya. Love ya. Mrs. Barton. Take us out, Mrs. Dunn. Take us out, Dunnies. Catch you next week, guys. Love you. Love you. Bye, bubs. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches.

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