Is It Just Me? - #160: I'm Always Unhappy with Louis Hanson

Episode Date: September 17, 2023

For the first time in IIJM history, Coombs took (a forced) week off, so we have the glorious writer, presenter and comedian Louis Hanson co-hosting with Churi.    In this episode: Mitchell live from NZ (00:30) Louis & Churis ‘interesting’ past…. (13:00) Shower Menus (19:00) Is It Just You? (42:00) Louis third threesome (50:00) Sound Of Silence (56:10) Our "Secret Segment" ADDebrief (1:03:40)   Hit us up: @coupleofmitches Send us a text: 0422 948 202See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Hello you. Hello you. Go! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Is it just me? Is familiar and farce kind of fun?

Just you, you filthy unhinged bitch. Honestly. What's wrong with you? Now here's Mitch Curie and Mitchell Coombs. Hello, you. Kia ora, you. Kia ora. Coming to us live from where are you?

Are you on a boat, you idiot? No. Well, I was on a boat, but I'm currently on Perky's Floating Bar on Lake Wakatipu in Queenstown, New Zealand. Wow. So it's like a ferry that doesn't go anywhere. It's just a floating bar. Oh, like a giant pontoon. Yes, essentially.

So basically I'm in New Zealand at very short notice. Now, can you explain what's going on? Because for the first time in the history of Is It Just Me, almost a five-year run on the cloud, awards, millions of dollars in ad revenue, you, Mitchell, are taking a show off for the first time. Well, am I? Because I'm here now, aren't I?

Well, are we going to get into an argument over this? Technically, you are here and you've made the effort, but you're not going to be here for the whole show, right? Yeah. So listen, I've been a podcasting bitch for quite a few years and never in the history of my podcasting career have i taken a day off not my cup of tea never took a day off schnitty committee never took a day off trash alley never took a day off apart from that time that i quit the whole show however today mitchell at your suggestion you said to me, Mitchell, you're on a spontaneous holiday.

Take the day off. And I just couldn't help myself from popping in and saying, hey, I'm literally here to say that I'm not here. Literally, I'm such an enabler. I just thought, I felt, you deserve a trip. You deserve to relax and not have to worry about the show. We're more than capable of getting a fill-in host, which we have, who is standing by ready to take over.

So is there anything you need to get in, Mitchell? Anything you want to say before you head off and sit on the non-moving boat? All I want to say is that you were a little bit too excited at the thought of me being away. I'm not! Because I said to you, I'm more than happy to do the show when I get back to Sydney, and then I'm more than happy to do the show from New Zealand, and you said, no, no, I insist.

Just don't bother. So it sounds like you want to get rid of me, and I won't stop you. No, I don't. I just want you to know that it's an option, and also it makes me feel as guilty about the three fill-in shows that I've made you organise, because I've just fucked off without a care in the world. Oh, surely we're up to seven.

No, no. And we don't need to count. We don't need to count. The time zones are all off, Mitchell. So it's almost bedtime for you. No, you're right. Thank you for popping in and saying hi. I do miss you.

Don't forget, whenever we go on a trip, we have to bring each other back a gift. So I'm expecting a New Zealand drink. I've already got one. Oh. I've already got one. Oh, God, you're good now. I feel bad for reminding you. Yeah, no, I'm expecting a New Zealand drink. I've already got one. Oh. I've already got one. Oh, God, you're good now. I feel bad for reminding you. Yeah, no, I'm on it.

Mitchell, all I can hear are seagulls. This is the worst place to record a podcast ever. Yeah, well, I'm on holiday, so sorry about that. Oh, you look gorgeous. How do I flip the camera on this shit? Let me just paint a picture. He's on a barge. I can see the beautiful mountains.

Whereabouts are you? What city? Queenstown, New Zealand. There's just paint a picture. He's on a barge. I can see the beautiful mountains. Whereabouts are you? What city? Queenstown, New Zealand. There's the seagull. He's the offensive seagull making all this noise. Shut up! There's the mountain ranges. Beautiful. Gorgeous. There's Lake Wakatipu. That's the gondola that I went up the other day.

And then I went on that canyon swing today. Oh, my God. Wow. You're having the time of your life, Mitchell. You know those swings where you sort of dangle from the air for a little bit? Yeah. And then with absolutely no notice, they just let you go. You catapult into the abyss.

I did that today. Mitchell, save all this. We want to hear about it next week. Don't blow your load. This is next week's conversation. Oh, well, I'll just go fuck myself then. Have a good show. No, don't.

We love you, Mitchell. We miss you. Congratulations on your first sick show. Half sick show. I'm not sick. And just so you know, and I want all of our idiots to know, this is like I've got mother's guilt over this. I can't abandon our podcast.

This is a huge deal for me. I know. You're not abandoning, but you're, I guess you are the maternal figure on the show. I'm the paternal figure on the show. I think, Lee, you know when, like, your dad has to babysit or your dad takes you driving? Like, you don't just, you don't trust him. But please trust me. I'll be good.

No, I have full faith in you. But please don't make any jokes about, we never needed him. We don't need Mitch because I will take it to heart. I just know it. Please. No, you will take it to the cutting room floor and you will edit them out. And I would never make a joke about you.

Ever. Not in that regard. Our friendship's too strong. I'm not editing this week's episode either. Who the fuck's editing? Are you actually not editing this? No. I'm on holiday, mate. I'll do it the fuck's editing? Are you actually not editing this? No. I'm on holiday, mate.

I'll do it. I'll sort it out. I'll pay someone. I'll put it on the kiddio. We'll outsource the editing. Don't worry. Anyway, have fun. All right, bud.

It's my week off. Have fun. Enjoy your week off. Enjoy New Zealand. Can't wait to hear all about it next week. And relax, okay? Have fun. We miss you.

We do. We really miss you. Oh, thank you, darling. Hey, can I just say one thing? Yeah. If I could, you'll love fun. We miss you. We do. We really miss you. Oh, thank you, darling. Hey, can I just say one thing? Yeah. If I could, you'll love this as a radio guy. If I can hook and tease to next week's episode when I'm back 100%. I will explain why the fuck I've done a spontaneous New Zealand trip.

And let's just say that explanation will require another group therapy session. Oh, crap. I'm not in trouble, am I? That's all I want to know. No, no, no. It's actually because you and I have the same therapist. We've done a group therapy before a few weeks ago, all about the weight loss, body image crap.

And I've got another group therapy for you. Oh, my God. All right. Therapies gal got another group therapy for you. Oh, my God. All right. Therapy's galore next week on the show. Mitchell, my celebrity fill-in guest, who is nowhere near as beautiful and as funny as you are, don't worry, is in reception. Go enjoy your barge. I'm going to let him in.

Guys, we're going to, well, let's take a break. I'm going to go bring in our fill-in host for this week's episode. Who is it? You're going to have to wait and listen to find out, Mitchell. Go on. Go on. Tell me. I want to find out, Mitchell. Go on. Go on. Tell me. I want to know.

All right. It is the one and only. My host today for one week only is the incomparable, the hilarious, the gorgeous, the online social media sensation. None other. No, I've had the week off. Okay. Very funny.

Very funny. Louis Hanson is here in reception and he's too gorgeous to be kept waiting. No doubt in some sort of denim overall number or a leather jacket and a crop top. I can't leave him waiting. Oh, shit. Now, I've got FOMO. I love Louis. I can stick around.

It's fine. No, get out of here. Get on your barge and fuck off and we'll see you in a week. Enjoy your trip. Relax. Don't feel guilty. Oh, God. Can we have Louis back on when I'm there so we can have him as a guest, please?

Well, let's see how it goes first. He's in my capable hands. I mean, Louis heard that I was in my slut era and he said, can I co-host? I went, no worries, Louis. Slide right in. Oh, my God. That's not what happened. That's not what happened at all.

I can't keep up. I was going to say, is Louis even single? Maybe he is. I don't know. He is. Louis is. Don't you worry. Louis is.

Maybe not after this episode. I've tried to fuck you for five years and you wouldn't let me anywhere near it. So this year, maybe I'm in the era of marrying my co-hosts. Darling, I'm on the spectrum. You've got to make it really obvious if you're trying to fuck me. I've never once detected any signals of that. Mitchell, we're not going into this now. You know, in the early days, I wanted to get right up in you.

In the first 12 months, I was horned up by you. You never told me that. Actually, sorry, I've got all the know in the early days i wanted to get right up in you in the first the first 12 months i was horned up by you you never told me that actually sorry i've got all the time in the world you never told me that you've only made jokes in passing and i assume they were jokes did you actually want to enter me yeah 100 yes in the first yeah before i got to know you i was gonna say what changed and then you fucking got to know me Our friendship got closer And I went no way That will not be happening Let's just do a podcast instead You know

I'd argue that a weekly podcast for five years Is far more intimate than one night inside each other So would I Wow Are you going to propose soon or Time will tell Go enjoy your trip Louis Hanson's here

Get out of here We'll see you next week mitchell okay we'll tell louis i said hi i will i'll send louis um your regards he's in reception guys i'm going to go and get him now then we're going to start the show with special guest comedian online sensation gorgeous handsome person louis hansen see you mitch one more thing one more thing we hope this podcast made you feel at least 3% better today. That's all. Just 3%.

You can't relinquish control. So we do. That's all of my obligations fulfilled. Bye. See ya. Goodbye, Mitchell. Is it just me? Hello, you.

Hello, everyone. Welcome to the show. Just me. It literally is just me. For the first time ever, the show is Is It Just Me? And for this one moment, it is just me.'t this it literally is just me for the first time ever the show is is it just me and for this one moment it is just me it's cheery here we just kicked coombs out he's on a barge in new zealand um so for the first time in the history of the podcast let's officially welcome in he's a good friend of mine you'll feel like he's a good friend of yours because he's on

every social media platform and every time i open my phone, I hear his dulcet tones. I see his bussy on every app I have on my phone, every single app. And you have seen it too. The one and only writer, presenter, comedian, Louis Hanson is here. Louis! Welcome. Sound effects. We have sound effects?

Oh my God, Louis. Sound effects. They're the way to my heart And Mitchell hates my sound effects, he hates them I love sound effects, that was amazing Thank you, I have them on standby Welcome to the show, how does it feel to be Mitch's first ever fill-in host? Hey, I'm feeling the pressure Heavy is the head that wears the crown, they say

And depending on how well I do today, this could be the only time that Mitchell Coombs has a replacement. I don't know how this has happened because he was so stressed about not doing the show and I said, just leave it with me. I'll sort it out. You didn't hear him because you were at reception in the building, but we just spoke to him on a barge in New Zealand and he would not leave. He just couldn't relinquish control.

I'm like, it's fine. And then he was so pissed off that I got you, who is, of course, gorgeous and hilarious. I think he wanted someone, you know, he wanted me to go low. I went so high. Oh, my angel. No, look, do you know what? What did he say in the chat? Is he having a good time?

He's having a great time. He booked the flight the day before he left. And then so this is why it's been such a clusterfuck because we didn't have the show. We didn't know who we were going to get. So he was a little stressed. But he's ziplining and bungee jumping. He's having the time of his life.

I was going to say quintessential NZ experience. You've got to bungee jump. Totally. Yeah, I would never do it though. I'd be the type of person that it would snap and I'd be dead. Or I'd get like, you know how it rides up in your groin and then you get that awkward photo of the jean dick? You know when the jean folds and you get the jean dick?

Yeah. Let me tell you, I went parasailing two months ago on the shores of Nice. Very splendid. Oh my. But I had a crotch situation. The vista was beautiful and I was trying to admire the French shoreline, trying to spot some dolphins in the ocean, if you will. Of course.

But I couldn't stop paying attention to the way it was riding up my crotch and it was really fucking painful. I know. Can we swear? I'll swear, Louis. Do what you want to do. On Ijeb. Oh, he's so good. He gets another applause.

Yes. On Ijeb. Ijeb. Ijeb. Ijeb. Louis, the best thing is, so the podcast is Is It Just Me? I-I! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! IJM! So the podcast is Is It Just Me? I-I-J-M. So we've been doing it for five years and we go, oh, IJM, IJM, IJM.

So people write in, they go, hi guys, I've got an IJM, but they spell it I-T-G-E-M. And it's like, guys, that's not, it's never been it. That's, that's not, some people think it's idiom, like I-D, like idiom, which is not it as well. Well, it just, you know, you really have to weed out the loyal listeners to the disloyal listeners. Totally. In fact, what do you call your listeners again? Oh, we call our listeners idiots.

Hi, idiots. Hi, idiots. It's lovely to be here. I feel like, yeah, this is quite a personal experience. Well, you know what? A bit of context. This is personal for us. We've known each other for a very long time, like pre your sort of your fame. I don't even remember how we met.

You are famous and relaxed, and I can say it. Do you remember? Well, I feel like the first time that we actually hung out for a considerable amount of time. I don't know how much I can really divulge in this situation. Oh, you're going to go there? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, go.

I'll start off vague and then we'll see how brave we're feeling and then we can add more details. You know, if you just want the story to be spicier. But we met when we were both auditioning for a show. Yeah. And we went into a particular studio. Yep. For probably, I think it was like a two or even three day intensive. Yes. I'm not too sure.

Yep. And the crux of the show was there were going to be two hosts. Mm-hmm. And there was probably, I'd say, 10 to 12 of us, you know, in the studios auditioning. And that essentially try and match all of the pairs together. And then they'd swap the pairs over. Yeah.

Like a chemistry test to find out who had the best banter with each other. Yeah. And I remember after the first day, I think they put us together once and I was like, oh, there was something electric there. I felt it too. I felt it too. Okay. Yeah.

There was something electric there. And then I think I remember us coming back. And then for the second day, I swear we did like two or three more chemistry reads together. And then I think at that point we kind of looked at each other and we were like, whoa, are we the ones? 100%. 100%. And then we both kind of like colluding on the side messaging and it's like that unreleased footage of one direction on the x factor days where they've got headshots and

they're putting together the group of the boy band yeah i remember i went to the bathroom to like you know in between in between takes and i see them on the wall and it's like mitch and louie and they're like holding it up they're like do we do it do we mitch and louie and then i think what happened was you and i felt so confident and then covet happened right and then the show never got funded it just died yeah and it was devastating because in my mind after those few days in the studio with you i was imagining us like kendall and kylie walking down the met gala together like that was that was the fantasy that i was feeling absolutely Absolutely. Yeah, The Simple Life. I was getting very much Paris and Miss Richie.

That was the vibe. Yeah, and then we just never heard back from them. Never happened. We never got a call back. But the best part is I've never told that story. It was you and me and then Francesco Hong, Miss Universe Australia. It was that gorgeous man, that gorgeous actor from Home and Away. Neighbours, Tim Karno.

Sorry. Get them confused. Very gorgeous man. Very gorgeous man. Tegan Nash, who is like the face of GoPro, she is currently on the base camp in Nepal about to trek Everest, and then it was you and me. These bumbling idiots just laughing at each other.

So funny. And there are times where I think back to those two or three days and I just think, fuck, was that a fever dream? Did that actually happen? There was this brief bubble, this moment of time where they put 10 of us together only for us to never see each other again. It's quite beautiful. very squid games-esque it was very frightening we all died we all died our careers most definitely died um well we're here now where would people know you from actually quickly just because you're um you start you made been making content for it's not that long right a couple years now a couple years i feel like

there's been um a few kind of facets in my life that people have followed me from like back in the day i was um a journo like nine to five journo yeah um did a lot of writing and um i feel like you know a few people started to follow along from that journey and then i'd say started 2020 um i'd already kind of started to delve into more video presenting social media stuff. And nothing, there's like nothing like a pandemic for you to just be like, okay, I'm going to quit my nine to five and have no stable income. Let's just fucking do it. So I just dedicated my life to posting seven TikToks a day for about a solid year. And from there, it's kind of led to podcasting,

presenting social media stuff. You know how it is in 2023. We're just doing shit. You've got to do it all. And it confuses the fuck out of my parents. They're like, but you want to be a radio presenter, mate. And what happened? I got my ear pierced and mum cried.

And she went, but what about TV? What if you get, what if Mitch? This is what she said to it, genuinely said, what if Waleed Ali gets ill and they need you on the project and you've got an earring in? And I went, oh, I think I'll be okay. I don't think I'm the understudy for Waleed Ali. More of a Pete Hellyer kind of body type, mum.

But thanks for the thought. They just can't understand that in this day and age, like you've got to do it all, mum. I'll be at Baker's Delight doing a six-hour casual shift this weekend. Exactly. You just never know. I mean, I was chatting to my friend Lucinda Froomes. We love her.

Yes, we love, we love. And things were looking a bit dry there for a week. The emails weren't coming in. And we looked at each other and we were like, should we just start a cafe? Like, is that on the horizon for us? It could be. You just never know.

100%. Maybe not yet. Leave that. That can be it. That's my professional advice. Five to ten years before the cafe, you've got more in you. Oh, thanks, Mitch. Okay, well, I'm excited to have you here for many reasons.

We should start the show. If it is your first time listening, welcome to Is It Just Me? Every week we start the show the same way something we notice something we hate or appreciate they're idjams um i normally don't know mitch's mitch doesn't know mine louis have you come prepared with an idjam i always come prepared oh god he's good yeah he's a professional he's a professional ladies and gentlemen um you told me before you have a couple. Have you settled on one? Yeah, I think so. I think this one...

Actually, you know what? I'm not even going to provide context for it. Okay, all right. Well, I'll go first to set the tone. You know I'm a giver. So let me lead the way. And then you ready to start the show? Let's do it.

All right, let's go, baby. Is it just me or do you also have very different types of showers for very different types of days completely yes yes yes yes yes let me set let me set the scene i have what i like to call an everything shower the everything shower which is like everything gets done tits toes teeth everything is scrubbed clean i will get out and i will floss i will get on my bum bum cream and i will exfoliate in that shower louie and i will scrub my pits i'll scrub the tits every bits will get scrubbed i'm i'll do a full shave i'll get the clipper out i'll shave i'll manscape i'll trim

um i will then get out. I'll do my full skin care. I'll do the LED Dr. Dennis Gross face mask. The hair mousse is in. More. Give us more. I will do my lash gel. My brow growth serum. I've got a nose trimmer. It goes in that hole. It spins. They're trimmed. I will then

put lubricating eye drops in, Louis. This is all true. This is my everything shower and it is once a week and it is a sunday night oh it's bliss it's bliss and how long does that take from start to finish the entire process this everything shower it's a seven day process it's exhausting and um it doesn't end it's no it's probably about it's really truthfully about an hour i'd say um but not in the shower the shower is probably the quickest part but like I'll do the full skincare I do actually have an led face mask that like is like a 20 minute thing like a red light um but that's a that's a once a week thing then I'll

have my everyday shower um which I'm assuming you know you do you shower once a day or twice a day look I'm a one to two day person. I would say it depends how many times. Oh, I would say definitely once. Okay, definitely once. Good. That's the bar. Don't be so proud of that. Give me a gold medal.

I shower. But yeah, sometimes twice. Yes, I'm sometimes twice as well. But most of the time it's just I'm a one shower a day. I would brush my teeth in the shower. Sh shampoo twice a week there's no shampoo it's just body wash just cleanse brush my teeth and i'm out in two minutes that's my every day you same for you for sure absolutely it's just you know we're getting the job done we're in and out we're doing what we have to do we have places to be we have places to be yeah people people to see

and then i've got one in the middle which is is, which will be a little bit more. I might do like an exfoliation on the face. I might be going to an event, you know, and I might want to look a bit, look a bit nicer. Maybe I'll do a midweek shampoo or a hair mask, you know, and maybe I'll chuck a bath in there in the middle of the week. That's fascinating. Sorry, I just thought about the fact that I have a confession. I haven't shampooed my hair this entire year. What? Take that cap off. Louis is wearing a cap.

Show me that cap. What's your hair doing? Oh, my God. I. And it looks fantastic, Louis. It looks clean. Well, this is my theory, though, is that, you know, you know what they say. You've been brainwashed by the women on TikTok.

You know what they say? Like, after a while, like, all the natural just goodies just, you cleanse itself. It learns how to self-cleanse. Who says that? Who? The staff at the Tree of Life? Louis? Please.

And let me tell you, I'm not that type of person. I'm not that type of person. But, like, yeah, I'm a champion. Natural oils? That is so bullshit. That's not real. No, I need to Google this. I want to feel the hair.

Because Louis is in Melbourne, guys, and I'm in Sydney. It's not oily. I promise. It's not oily. It's gorgeous. It is gorgeous. Your hairline, too, is nice and thick. What's your ethnicity?

Thank you. Country Victoria. thick what's that what's that what are you what's your ethnicity thank you um country victoria literally we're talking shepherding and we're talking hamilton we're talking on the cattle farm lawn um where you look you look the hair looks gorgeous so you don't shampoo that's how old are you though what are we the same age i'm 27 we're the same age aren't we yeah exactly same age yes yes yes. I think it looks good. I have to do it twice a week, though, but I would like to get out of it because my hair's got that real manicured look, and I'm trying to get out of it.

I'm kind of over that. You've got the real, I could have just had great sex and rolled out of bed, or I could have just gone BMX riding, or I've just woke up, but I look this good, you know? Well, I mean, look, thank thank you but i'm going to return that compliment in saying that i envy your hair i envy the perfect quiff yeah thank you yeah the perfect quiff quaff i think it's stunning the buffon well it's glued in i got it on the tiktok shop yeah yeah excellent it's really good now are you googling this? Because I don't... Yeah, is it okay if I don't shampoo? It's already been marked.

Not washing your hair enough may lead to conditions like dandruff or itchy scalp. Okay, so we're not going to talk about this. Anyway, but... You just dug that hole for yourself, and I'm leaving all that in. I think you look good. We'll put a photo of Louis' hair, hairline, and crown on the Is It Just Me socials with a HD macro camera. Oh, the hat's back on. Look, he's going bright red.

So embarrassed. The hat's going back on because I just feel like some days I wake up and the energy is giving, put a cap on. Yeah, no, I feel you. I can't wear a cap, Louis. Have you seen me with a cap on? No, I haven't. Oh, my God, Louis. I need to find you a cap.

It does something. It tears a hole in the time-space continuum. Excellent. And it just, it does something. Let me find one. The Earth shifts on its axis. Earth shatters. I'll send you a photo because it's actually horrific.

Because my hair, right, shapes my face. If I don't have hair, I am, you know, Burt Newton moments from death. It is really grim. Look at that. Look, I'm trying to know, Burt Newton moments from death. It is really grim. Look at that. Look, I'm trying to hide my quiff. Do you see that? That's not, no one wants to be near that. It's stunning.

It's very round. It's like the moon emoji. Look at that. Especially this tan that I've got going on at the moment and my LED face lamp, you know, it's really cooking me up. Anyway, I just want to say, everyone, shake up your shower routine. Try an everything shower. It'll revitalize you, get you ready for a week.

It really will. It's funny that you kind of separated these showers based on the level of care. Because I have different showers, but I would say they're more emotion-based, if that makes sense. Oh, interesting. Go on. And that's why showers can be so different to me because I can have a bored shower. Sometimes I'm bored and I need to fill in time. I'll have a shower.

Yes. Sometimes I'll have a performance shower where i just want to deliver a world tour i'm gonna put on the speakers i'm gonna put on your ariana's your tailors great i'm gonna perform like it's nobody's business yes um yeah and that will always it'll vary day to day but for me it's it depends on the emotion got it i really i love that i'm the same i guess but for me a shower is it's it's practical it's it's serving a purpose i i'm like i want to get in and get out it takes a lot for me to get in the shower i've told this on the show before maybe it's tmi you can share if you want but i used to be a shower masturbator like i used

to really enjoy like a shower wank um i really liked i just liked the vibe maybe something about the blood vessels and the heat and it's so so easy, you know, on that shower screen, and it's, you know, job done. But nowadays I can't. I'm so big that I can't stand up and stay erect. I think I'm just – there's not enough blood in my body to pump into a hard penis and to keep my heart pumping. Do you have a –

Do you have a bath? Do you have a bath? Like, is it a bath? Have you ever tried sitting down on the edge of the bath? What? No. Do you? Why not?

Hold on. Sitting down on the edge of it? I mean, you said you can't stand up. Sit down. Take a stand up. Sit down. Take a load off. Sit down. Oh, fuck you. Okay.

All right. That's enough info for today, everybody. But that's amazing. TMI. Yeah. It takes me back to when I was traveling. I had my gap year in Europe. Yep. Six months away,

and it was with three guys, so lots of Airbnbs and no real privacy. So the real shower masturbating fantasy came to fruition on my gap year. It takes me back. Yeah, it's a real active necessity. Like when you need to do it, shower is the place to be. It's perfect. It's kind of beautiful. It is perfect. It's kind of beautiful. It is beautiful.

It's very romantic. All right, well, I'm glad you know that about me now, and I'm glad I've got the mental image of you sitting over the edge of a bath going at it, and the world does too. All right, are you ready for your idjim, Louis Hansen? Yeah, it's time. All right, let's go. Is it just me or... Is it really easy to gauge whether someone is newly single

by their social media posting habits? Oh, no. You're not coming for me here. And when I was thinking about this one, I did think, okay, Mitch might think this is a direct attack, but it's not. Consider this more a rite of passage that we all have to go through. I'm not saying this is you in particular, but I'm saying that there's been a few couples in my life recently where I've been curious as to whether they have been together or not.

But you just, you start to see a change in their pattern of posting. We're talking workout content. We're talking selfies. Sure. Back in the day, you would just see them post a picture of like a nice flower or look at these gorgeous leaves. Yes. Now it is workout content. It is sexy selfies.

And for that, I truly stand. You are completely reading me to filth. This is what I've done. I am reading you to filth, but I'm also reading myself to filth. And every newly single person. Because I feel like it's a genuine rite of passage that we all go through. Because you're single, right, Louis? I am.

I've been single for about a year now. Wait, well, hold on, because the day this, because you were telling me before, the day this episode drops, Monday, is... Yeah, yeah. So I wasn't sure when this drops. Sorry to break the illusion, my gorgeous idiots, but we are recording a few days in advance. idiots um but we are recording a few days in advance uh-huh and uh i i clocked the numbers and it will be my one year anniversary of singleton oh my god yeah so well deserved and happy one year singleton singleton singleton is that where you're from i singleton singleton yeah i feel you've thrived because i've been following you and you did it really well.

I completely agree. You can tell when someone has broken up with their significant other, especially when they were a public couple. I mean, I was a bit of a public couple, you know, with my ex for five years. And then when you kind of have to go, shit, a lot of the content was with them. So I guess anything that I would have posted would have been a chain. I'm defending myself here. No, no, that is very true.

Yeah. And well, you're one year out. You've done really well though. Like I don't feel like you post, you post thotty stuff, but you're a gorgeous person. So you could put up, you know, a photo of you on the side of the bathtub and that would be perceived as being thotty, you know? Okay, let's post it to the Idj the Instagram of me squatting over the bathtub.

And then we'll just do a little bit of a poll about whether we think this is cute or not. Okay. Okay. Wait. So are you, cause I am, I've spoken about it in the last few weeks. I'm in my, I'm in my little hoe era. I'm in my slut era as Mitchell has coined it. Have you had one or you could give me some tips?

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, I do need to say, I listened to the last few episodes and I was really, really proud of you going on this journey, going in this, as Mitch would like to say, the slut era. But I absolutely embarked on that this year and it has been incredible. Do you have any like, I don't know, do you have any questions? Do you have any? Oh, okay. Oh my god. Yeah, like let's talk about it. Let's talk about the slut errors.

You're in Melbourne and I love Melbourne. I felt more, I don't know if you can speak to this phenomenon, but I feel like there is much more attention in Melbourne. Like in Sydney, the gay scene I feel is so looks based you know, and there's such a group of gays in Sydney that I feel can isolate other small little pockets of gay people.

But in Melbourne, I'm like, oh, everyone's got a mullet and they're wearing baggy pants and they all live in a, you know, mould-ridden share house and I love them all for it. And they talk to me, even if they don't want to touch me, like I messaged a couple of people and they will still have a conversation, you know. I just get blocked touch me. Like, I messaged a couple people, and they will still have a conversation, you know? I just get blocked in Sydney. Yeah, honestly, Sydney is savage.

Sydney is so cutthroat when it comes to the gay community. I'd say that, I'm like, in my mind, will I get cancelled for these things? But I do think that in Sydney, there's a bigger community, right? But it's a bit more generic. And in Melbourne, it may be a bit of a smaller scene, but I just feel like it's more eclectic. There's just more diversity amongst the mix. No, I completely agree.

Do you find that dating in Melbourne is easier than Sydney? Define dating. Okay. Are you dating? Are you messaging, flirting uh maybe sending a voice message because that's a real power play i love sending a voice message and then sometimes i'll progress straight to video message like that's my love language is also messaging that's the energy i need and if it's not matched instantly done then it progresses to like a date or a drinks

like a dinner or a drinks that's a date to to me. Yeah. Oh my God. How good is flirting? How good is dating? Oh, Lily. I love flirting. It's so good. It's so much fun. How many people do you have on your current roster? Let's just be real. Okay.

So let's, if we're going back this entire year, given that it is the anniversary, I would say that the end of last year, I coped with the breakup by dating so many people okay i dated so many people and it was fun it was really really fun but um then coming into the new year i kind of took a step back a bit because i thought you know what's all this dating good for if um emotionally i'm not ready to just like get back in there so So then it became like a purely physical thing. You know, I'm not talking like, I'm not being like a douche about it, but like, you know, we manage expectations up front. We know what it is.

We know we're having some fun. And that's just kind of been my energy for the entire year. But that all culminated to my experience in Europe. I went to Europe. Every other Australian did. And I had an amazing time. It was so debaucherous. Okay, great.

But I came back and I think for the first time I thought, oh, wouldn't it be nice to settle down? Oh, wee! Oh, my God. I know. Oh, wee! Like maybe I needed a one year exactly to just cleanse myself of all the debauchery. And then to go back deep in love to find your one. Do you know who you want?

Like when you picture your dream partner, who is it? Can you see them? No, and I think that's the issue. Yeah. I'm always unhappy. That's the title of the episode. Louis Hanson joins. Is it just me?

I'm always unhappy. No, I just don't know. What do you mean? High standards. Because let's be real. I don't want to beat around the bush for God's sake. You are gorgeous and you're beautiful inside and out. No, I know you and you're a beautiful person.

You're a kind soul. You're very, very funny. You, I know you, and you're a beautiful person. You're a kind soul. You're very, very funny. You, to many people, are the dream man. So I imagine it would be very hard for you to date, and are your standards set very high? I think all of our standards should be set high. Oh, my God! Guys, Louis just picked up a placard that was written by his manager,

and he's reading it. It's written in bold text, and he's just reading the card. Oh, no. Okay. I don't know. Just be honest. You can be you, Louis. I just don't know.

I don't know what I want because then I start talking to someone and we go out on a date and it's like it's fun. But then I just find myself pulling away. I don't know if it's these like, I don't know, things from past relationships and I've built up these walls. But I think I'm in a real clean slate moment of my life where I want to dip my toe back into the dating world. But I just, I don't know what I want. I don't know what I want. Okay.

All right. Well, did you- You're my therapist. I know. This what I want. Okay. All right. Well, did you- You're my therapist. I know. This feels very therapy-esque. Also, I'm four months out of a relationship. Why am I helping you? I still cry myself to sleep.

It's been 12 months for you. No, I don't. I don't. No, I don't. But I did go out on a first date last weekend. Oh, my God. Okay. And how did it go?

It was really good. nice did you did you hook up or do you hook up on first dates i'm not opposed to that and if anything probably would have but here's the catch here's the catch we met at a barry's class we we met at a barry's class why is that the catch yeah because you'll you'll understand you'll understand we met at a barry's class why is that the catch yeah because you'll you'll understand you'll understand we met at barry's class and then we we started talking but for a first date he invited me out to a brunch oh and i just feel like that's very that's very you know his energy he likes to not spend you know too many hours in the clubs he to get up early. He wants to go for a walk, coffee, brunch. Got it.

Which is so different to what I expect on a first date. Like if in the past, if I've gone on first dates, I'm expecting a gallon of alcohol, borderline blackout, and not remember what we talked about. Yes. So this just felt like a very different, but also welcomed switcher. Yeah, it signaled a progression to a different era of your life.

It felt very mature and calm. Do you date older normally, Louis, or do you prefer younger? I would prefer older. Interesting. And when's your birthday? October 25th. Okay, so I'm younger than you. So there you go.

Then my plan's out. Oh, shit. Damn it. Oh, damn it. I was on domain looking younger than you, so there you go. Oh, shit! Damn it! Oh, damn it! I was on domain looking for apartments with baths as we speak. Fucking hell! But here's the thing, though. I think I always...

Just say I'm going onto a dating app, right? My aim is to date someone older. But sometimes there's something about that younger charm. I'm talking just a couple years younger. Yeah, of course. But there's something about that younger charm. I'm talking just a couple of years younger. Yeah, of course.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. But there's something about a boy, a boy, a man in his mid-20s who has a bit more fire about his chat than someone in their 30s. Yes. I agree completely. I went on a date with a 21-year-old. See?

And it was so much fun. I gave a blowjob on a boardwalk. See, and do you know what? It's because they have a lust for life. Yes, they've got a lust for life. He's like, do you want to blowjob? I'm like, we're on a boardwalk. He's like, yeah.

I'm like, yeah, that's what I need to have in my life. So I did, Louis. I did. I'm not afraid to say it. Where was the boardwalk? I don't want to get too specific. They were public cameras. What time of day?

It was midnight after a first date. That's great. And was that the most public thing sexually that you've ever done? With a non-partner, yeah. But no, I've... Yeah, great. I've had... Yeah.

Okay, cool. Just picture the Harbour Bridge. Well, now, one more question for you. Do you feel you've ever been in love? This is a really big question. This is big. And I've got my finger on the applause sound effect for a ninth time based on your answer.

Okay, have your finger ready. Okay, oh, my God, yeah. No! Oh! No. Oh, I was going to say that. So good. So, oh, God, I love it.

Well, you are deserving of love. You need love. And now that I'm single, I'm like, I want to help you find love. Let's find love together, you know? There were a couple of ways that I found out you were single without you telling me. Shall I go through them? Yeah. Oh, my God. This is great.

Yes, please. I firstly got a notification from Raya. I get a Raya. Listen up, my gorgeous idiots. Oh no. I get a notification on Raya and- Which Raya is the dating app for, it's like, what is it? It's for people in the public eye.

Is that how you describe it? Look, I think it started as that and now it's just evolved into something hideous. It is not good. Let me tell you, folks out there, don't, and it's fucking like $25 a month. Don't pay it. Yes, I'm still on it. But I'm just holding out for a hero, but I, I've been on it for about a year and have never had a substantial chat with someone.

Um, anyway, I'm getting, I get this notification and, oh, I, I forgot, forgot how it was worded, but it was essentially along the lines of Mitch is in your contacts. Mitch is joining Raya. Do you know him? Or like providing some kind of endorsement because kind of the way to get into Raya is most of the time you have to know someone who's already on it. Yes. So I think they always, they just see who contacts with each other.

And so I get this notification and that's when I was kind of clocked onto the fact that you could have been single. But then I go into TikTok I think the next day and you've done SponCon for a bed. The way you paint me is that I am this loveless commercial beast. Hayden, I'm leaving you. Falls asleep, wakes up raya koala mattress spawn console i can fuck for the rest of the year on a free bed that i didn't pay for i mean hey all power to you if you're going to do a breakup announcement on tiktok you may as well get a few stacks for well let me just tell you i did the whole i haven't spoken about what went down and

i never will it's just not my style not my yeah and it's just very personal and um i couldn't get through it without uh punching a wall so i just don't um but that was like my way of just going i want to put it out there also mitch is mitch is hooked up with listeners our listeners who are all beautiful our idiots are gorgeous and i'm like i need to let them know that i'm on the market you know i need to be that needs to be made. Well, no. After the past couple of episodes, did you have any idiots slide into the DMs? Yes. How many?

Yes. Like half a dozen, perhaps. Half a dozen. They said, we heard that you sleep with listeners. Hello, I am present. Yeah, most definitely. Yeah. You said that you were the Bowser looking for a peach.

I am a peach. I love that you got that reference. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, most definitely. You said that you were the Bowser looking for a peach. I am a peach. I love that you got that reference. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, I understood it straight away. Thank you so much. That is how we need to define ourselves sexually going forward. I'm a real Bowser looking to red shell someone. You're listening to Is It Just Me? Got

something on your mind? Hit up at couple of mitches on Instagram to get yourself on the show. All right, Louis, you and I have just done an Is It Just Me? It is now time to go to the phones and get an Is It Just You on the air. This is where we let our beautiful idiots voice one of their concerns, something they've noticed they hate or appreciate. Shall we take one? Shall we go to the phone? I'm so excited for this.

This is very exciting. We're going to Briz Vegas today. The one and only Luke joins us. Hi, Lukey. Luke. Hello. Hello. Hi.

How are you? Just the boys. Just the boys. The lads together. What are you doing? How's Brizzy? Just combated a bush turkey, but I'm fine. You know how it is.

What? Is that a euphemism? No, not even a euphemism. No, gosh, no. They're like the seagulls of suburbia, these bush turkeys. What do you mean? They just wander around Brisbane, do they? They steal in Brisbane.

They steal everything. It's terrifying. Wow. Are they hunted for sport? Can you eat a bush turkey? Or they're in danger? Actually, I'm pretty sure someone did try and eat a bush turkey, but, yeah, he's incarcerated.

Yeah, best to not do that. Best that he sits in prison. All right, Luke, well, let's get you on. Bradley will count you in and then you hit us with your region, okay? Oh, it's happening so fast. Oh, get ready. The time is now. Luke, we don't beat around the bush.

No bush turkeys here. I know. Baby. All right, Bradley, can't you relax? Okay. Have you heard the show before? Yes, I've heard the show. Luke, you got this.

Luke, that's okay. I support you. Take a deep breath. I need my debrief already. Okay. I want to be friends with Luke really bad. Yeah, Luke Luke I like Luke Luke's fun

well Louis in the wise words of Mr. G the show's not about you it's about the show okay so let's all calm down well okay

Luke and I could either be best friends or we'd be throwing a margarita at each other 100% 100% I'm staying out of this alright Bradley go for it

is it just me or 100%, 100%. I'm staying out of this. All right, Bradley, go for it. Is it just me or...? Is there a legitimate anxiety when you take up your Polaroids to the young girl at Kmart and she's there judging you when you pick them up and 55-year-old Sandy is looking at you like you've just committed a crime? Oh, I've been in this situation. When you go to get photos developed at Kmart or like a DigiDirect, because they actually have to look through the films and develop them,

and they see all the images. 100%. The amount of times I thought I was going to prison. What photos have you been taking? Yeah, what? Well, no. Use of anything these days is apparently illegal. What do you mean?

Let's not go into that. No, the use of anything? What are you taking photos of? Sometimes, you know, sometimes you just, you know, pop in a paracetamol and you take a little photo of it, but you don't know if they're actually going to, you know, report you. Wait, I thought you were talking about, like, nudes. Look, because I've been there. I've also been there. Yeah. Yeah. to report to. Wait, I thought you were talking about, like, nudes, Luke,

because I've been there. I've also been there. Yeah. No, that's even worse. No, I've been in that exact situation. I don't know about you, Louie, but I shoot, like, 35mm film. Like, when I go on holidays, I take my little Canon and I shoot film. Yeah, and then when I first was in my last relationship,

very, very in the early days, you know, when you're still real horned up for each other. I took like a whole bunch of boudoir photos with them. Oh, I've been there. We were in New York and they were full on hole picks. Anyway, we get back to Sydney. We take it to DigiDirect Westfield Miranda, God bless Shannon, at the front desk and she developed them and was icy.

Like so icy when she handed them to me. I'm talking about the judgment that the Lord, like we don't need that judgment, okay? and she developed them and was icy. Like, so icy when she handed them to me. Stop. I'm talking about the judgment that the law, like, we don't need that judgment, okay? Can I also just say that if you're into some shower stuff, the waterproof Polaroids that have come out, please. Oh, my God. This is so funny. We were just talking about that this episode.

We were just discussing shower stuff. Oh, really? Well, no, seriously, the waterproof Polaroids, you can now take them into the shower, take as many photos as you want, and you can go get them developed. You are an animal. Oh? I'm not an animal. I'm no bush turkey, but...

Hold on. Hold on. So the camera itself is waterproof? I think so. I don't know how physics works, but I'm assuming so. Have you seen these, Louis? No, I don't know how physics works, but I'm assuming so. Have you seen these, Louis? No, I didn't know these existed. Waterproof.

Oh, it's a three-word Google search. Oh, what a sad one. You're careful there. I can drop you at any moment, Luke. So, wow, that's so interesting. Do you shoot film, Louis? Do you ever do anything like that? I don't, honestly.

Yeah. So sorry. No, no, i don't blame you you're a camera roll baddie is your camera roll full do you have a hidden folder louis do you know okay so last week i decided that i needed a hidden folder yeah because you know just over the last little while 12 months perhaps 12 months 12 months of single life has passed and yeah i find myself more and more um when i show someone my camera roll getting fucking terrified about what will show up so i had this come come

to jesus moment where i was like i need i need a private elbow and do you have one of the apps that's disguised as a disguised as a calculator or do you have the hidden app on iphone the hidden folder that's sorry the hidden folder. Yes, yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God, Louis, warning, though. The hidden folder, if you plug it into a computer, doesn't work. No.

If you plug your phone, because I did it to Mitchell. The other day, Mitchell went, oh, can you, we did the bar class for our hobby hunt. There's that bush turkey. There's that bush turkey. Coming back for revenge. Oh, sorry. No,'s that bush turkey. There's that bush turkey. Coming back for revenge. Oh, sorry. No, she's getting aggressive. It's fine.

Mitch goes, can you send me the videos from our bar class? And I go, sure. They're really large. He goes, plug your phone in. So I plug it in. And all these nudes open up on his computer. Yes. Yeah, he sees them all.

He sees all of them. See, it's ruthless. And that's why I don't trust the cloud either. I don't know where that goes. The cloud's not real. Let's be honest, the cloud's not real. No, the cloud's not real. And after what happened to J-Law, you know, like, I don't trust it.

All right, Luke, we're going to let you go. You sound like you're in the middle of a Corumban bird sanctuary, for Christ's sake. You know, a bit of respect for the show. No worries. All right, thank you, Luke. A DM prize keeper, Jenna, will get you a prize, okay? All right. Bye.

See you, Luke. No worries. Unhinged. See you, Lukey. No worries. Unhinged. I loved him and then I hated him very quickly. I oscillated between the two. You got very quiet at one point. I'm like, they're going to fucking throw fists so soon.

He's upset my guest of honor. I storm out of the studio. No, we love Luke. I would genuinely want to have a couple spicy mugs with Luke. Me too. Me too. 100%. If you want to get in touch and have an Is It Just You on the show, slide into the DMs at couplemitches and we'll get you on.

Okay, Louis Hanson is here, everybody. He's my gorgeous co-host. First time in IJM history that Mitchell Coombs has been away. He is absent. But, Louis, you're doing a brilliant job. Thank you. Does it feel strange to be talking to someone different? No.

To be with another man. Not Mitchell Coombs. To share the company with another man. No, because I love you and I adore you. That's why I chose you. I love you. I picked you. I'm just honestly so happy to be here.

And I know I think we've already said this But it bears repeating You are in your sexiest fucking era right now Stop it Yes you're thriving Stop it I feel good No I genuinely feel good And it's something that you and I were talking about

Before we turned the mics on But you know It's just like a new found confidence I don't know what's going on But I feel Like I've never had this period in my life. You know, so it just is a nice little I feel 21 again. It's really

weird. I really do. It truly is a rebirth. And there's just something so freeing about it. It's nice. It's really incredible to see. And so when you asked me to be on the show, I was just like, fuck, I would love to sit down for an hour or so and talk to this incredible

human. Oh my god, bless you. Bless you so much. But if I was fat three months ago, you would have said no. Is that what you're saying? Fuck off! Interesting. No fats, no fems. You've always been... Fuck off. I've just seen... I sexually matched with you in Melbourne. I didn't want to bring it up and you blocked me.

No, you've always been a sexy motherfucker. You know that. Get over this. Hold on, hold on. You're trying to bring it up and you blocked me. No, you've always been a sexy motherfucker. You know that. Get over this. Hold on, hold on. You're trying to be so candid and coy. Calm down. Calm down. I've got so many sound effects. Fuck.

Mitch hates the sound effects, Louis. He just doesn't enjoy them. No, I actually love a sound effect. Me too, because they add to something. Like, if I were to say to you, like like i'm going to tell a story right and i go louis oh my god i stayed at my nens house she lives in wulingong in this old old dilapidated house right and it's it's an attic that's where i stay when i'm staying with my alma you know covered in cobwebs and i open the door to the attic and what do I see?

But I see a porcelain Dutch doll in wooden clogs and its eyes move, Louis. Their eyes move. See, the sound effect just made that fantastic, didn't it? That was great. I just got shivers. Talk about your European trip. Shivers. It's a Greek national anthem.

That's how I felt after my first threesome. That's the best. Yeah. Come on. He did it. He started Greek patriotism. Is what you're saying, your thrusting started those Greek bushfires? Is that what happened, Louis?

No, that is too real. As someone who was in those Greek bushfires. Yes, I know oh my god hold on tell me about the um telling about this greek threesome what happened oh are you happy to disclose goodness well see this is this is the my dilemma at the moment right i had so much fun in europe yeah and i get close to the microphone and turn your microphone right up so you don't have to speak loudly i lived so many lives in europe yeah there was so much debauchery it was hot yeah it was sweaty um but i've come back to Melbourne and I don't know if I can divulge all of the details of my stories. Yeah. Because there was some debauchery.

But one night I engaged in a menage a trois. First ever? Third. Oh God. Third ever threesome. Third ever threesome. First in Europe. And funny I say menage a trois, it was in Nice of all places.

I think the day after I went parasailing. Oh, my God. Because the crotch was so horned up from the belt, actually. Let me just tell you, life has two great pleasures, parasailing and threesomes. I can only imagine. Did you have one other person or did you have the two? Were they looking for a third? Come on, give me something.

They were a couple. Of course they were. From America. I'm still trying to do the sultry voice. Oh, sorry. Cut the music. You can be honest. Cut the cameras.

Cut the cameras. No, I love, I love out of my, I love that I'm talking as if I'm so well versed in threesomes. I've had three threesomes. Okay. But the, yeah, the experience in Nice was really fun because I love, I love doing it with a couple because I am the prized possession. Like all the attention is on me and that's so fun. Oh my God. That's so true. So do you, are you like, I mean, I don't want to, are you like

at their disposal? Is that kind of what's hot? Like you sort of, um, you know, do, do with me what you will to get you guys off or is it, is that not it? Well, that, that is very, that's kind of hot. That is kind of hot. I will admit that, but this felt very, um, even though I, I i was the newbie the stranger in the situation we were all on the same level you know it just felt very primal wow and the best part about it is with was it one of those threesomes where they kind of i hate fucking like they their relationship's about to break up so this is the act of saving it like could could you see the tension in their eyes or were they very much in love? I was shocked because midway through they'd look at each other

and be like, oh, I love you so much. Aww. Yeah. So it was actually- And you were like, sorry, were you directing that to me? Yep. I love you too. Yeah.

I'd get a bit jealous if the attention wasn't on me for five seconds. But no, it was great to see that dynamic between the two of them. I love that we're having this conversation right now. It's fine. Be comfortable. Just be open. I'm glad you feel comfortable. Once again, I am your therapist.

I always fall into this role. I'm doing it for the idiots out there. Well, I can't wait for my first threesome. Louis's third threesome, Mitch's first threesome. I need a speech pathologist. I can't wait and I'll call you and let you know how it goes. Okay? It will be everything and more.

Trust me. Before I engaged in one, I thought that I would be the person in the corner that was left out. Like, they're kind of jerking each other off and I'm in the corner like cutting up some sliced oranges for everyone. Like, handing out some Gatorade, that energy. But, you know what all you need to do is just find the right couple and i swear by the couple theory because then they really focus on you you know i know but you and i come from like happy healthy like your parents are still together yes they are so are mine do you think that's fucked us like do you think that's

really fucked us because we have this vision of pure a pupil that my parents are so in love louis oh that's what i want i want a husband that can be in love with me in 40 years in the same burning desire that they had for me when we first met i think that that is a very valid reason like my parents are the same like i i love my i actually see similarities with your parents and my parents like when you talk about your dad and stuff because my parents are absolute teddy bears as well yeah um but i see their relationship and i see my brother and my sister-in-law's relationship they've been together for about 10 years yeah your beautiful niece i see it all yeah with my niece and so you know i'm surrounded by really you know incredible strong relationships and i'm thinking, maybe that has fucked me over a bit because I'm like,

well, if it's not up to their standards in my eyes, then I don't want it. My God, I'm so similar. Very, very similar. And now I'm falling in love with Louis Hanson and I'm staring into his eyes down the zoom camera. Something's happening. Let's move on. We're going to play this with louis hansen let's go

sound of silence which is a game that we play with many of our guests it is where we challenge um them to call someone in their contact list and hold a phone call for as long as they can now um the timer will start when you ask the first question. So, Louis, we're going to get you to call someone. You can call whoever you like, but the timer will begin after the first question. So you can say, oh, hi, it's me, Louis. What are you doing right now?

Timer starts at the point of the first question. So then they can get an answer out and then you can see how long they stay. Does it make sense? Yeah, great. I'm excited. I really want to start off so broad and vague to just see what twists they get themselves into. 100%.

But you also, I will say the rules are you have one bridging phrase. So if you feel, if you're feeling that they're about to hang up, you can add one. Okay, cool. Yeah, yes, yes, yes. You have something, but it can't cool. Yeah, yeah. Yes, yes, yes. You have something, but it can't be, how was your day? Too much. No, no, no, no.

No! Just something to keep it going, you know, edge them a little. This is incredible. Yeah, it's a lot. Carla from Bankstown, I believe. See, Mitch is the brains of the show. I'm just the beauty. He remembers the times and who did well but carla from bankstown i believe um um eloise f toss did really well i think she's the last one we did

it with anyway let's see how long you go for okay louis who are we calling today today we are calling my lovely lovely dear friend tully smythe oh i, I love Tully. Tully was on Big Brother a couple of years ago, right? Yeah, she was. She's been on a couple of times and she is a dear friend. We've become very close over the past year or so. And I just think that she would be so funny for this. All right. Well, I'm going to get my time around.

You have one question, then full silence, Louis. Do not speak. How long can you keep Tully Smythe on the line for? And only one like, then full silence, Louis. Do not speak. How long can you keep Tully Smife on the line for? And only one, like, or phrase. Correct. Correct. You'll be fine. You've got this.

Let's dial Tully. The timer will begin after the first question is asked. Hi, you've called Tully. I never check my phone. Real friends leaving us in the dust. Do you want to try anyone else? Froome's is on a flight, yeah? Yeah.

I mean, we can try Lucinda. I don't know when her flight is. Why don't we try your mum? What's her name? What are the details? We're calling my best friend in the world, my mother. Oh, bless her. Julie Hanson. Julie Hanson on the socials.

She's gorgeous. She's an icon. Oh, she is everything and more. And I think she'll be great for this because, bless her soul, when she gets on a tangent, she will not stop. Oh, love. Okay, well, you've got one question to ask, so make sure it's a tangent, she will not stop. Oh, love. Okay, well, you've got one question to ask, so make sure it's a good question to keep it going.

And then one bridging sentence. We're calling your beautiful mother. You feeling okay? Can I dial? Let's dial. Okay. I'm tapping out. It's all you.

This is Julie. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you. Do not disturb. Oh, this is Julie. Please leave a message and I'll get back to you. Do not disturb. Oh, this is brutal. Let me try one more time. Because maybe it'll push through, do not. Yeah. No, her phone's off.

This is Julie. Her phone's off. Should we try dad? Okay. Yeah, let's try dad. This is great. We should just leave all this in and not do a prank call. I know.

Honestly, the fact that we've been trying to prank all of these people, no one picks up. Imagine if I truly needed help right now. No one's picking up. No one gives a shit for poor Louie. Okay. We're calling my father. The love of my life, Mr. Andrew Hanson. Oh my God.

I've seen him in the content. Your dad's a silver fox. He's a gorgeous man. He is such a sweetheart, and I'm just obsessed with him. I don't know how long he will talk, though, so this will be very interesting. Okay, well, let's try it. Let's call your dad. Sound of silence starts from the first question, so ask him a question, and I'll start the

timer, okay? Hi, you've called Andrew Hanson. I can't take your call just now. Stop. Wait, wait. So for the first time in IJM history, we have called three people who refused to pick up. Oh my God.

You know what? Let's leave it there. That's the end of the show everybody I think that is No one loves me enough to pick the fuck up This is the best We wanted to beat the record But in fact you have set a record

The shortest ever Sound of Silence call in the history of vision I love it Alright I think that's a perfect note to end on Louis thank you for coming on the show Yay I love you Oh we had so much fun All right. I think that's a perfect note to end on. Louis, thank you for coming on the show. Yay. I love you. Oh, we had so much fun.

Louis Hanson on all socials, TikTok, Insta. You know, I'm sure you've got a Twitch. There'd be a LinkedIn there. Oh, there'll be something. Yeah, just go explore. Yeah. Yeah. Tap away.

You'll find something. Give him a follow. Are you doing any live shows with Froomzy, Listen to Price, or none coming up? None coming up, but I will say there are some in the works, but I can't reveal any information. Oh, my God. All right, well, I can't wait. Thank you for being here. So we have nothing on.

I just lied. Did you love that I gave you a bone, threw you a bone? I'm like, have something. Have a free promo. All right, thank you for coming here. Guys, we'll see you. Thank you for coming here. Guys, we'll see you. Thank you for coming here. This is a deli at Coles.

Thanks for coming. Thank you, everyone. We're back next week. Coombs will be back. Jenna will be back as well. Normally, we have our prize keeper, our third wheel, but Jenna was a no-show. She has an ear infection, Louis. Damn, it's just been you and I.

I think we held the ship, held the fort down. We were fine. I think we kind of killed that. I'm not going to lie. Bowser and Peach, baby. If Mitch ever dies, let's start a podcast just Bowser and Peach. I think that'd be brilliant.

Yeah, cool. I'm sure he's going to love hearing that. No, he'll be fine. He won't listen to this because he's seething with jealousy, but we do miss you, Mitch. We miss you. Great to have you. We'll see you next week, idiots. Goodbye. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches.

Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to AD Debrief. I've actually never said that, Louis. Mitch always brings in AD Debrief. That's the first time in my whole history of hosting this podcast that I've said that. That's rather profound. It's pretty big. Welcome to AD debrief. I can't even remember what Mitch says. Nothing is prepared. Nothing is rehearsed. We have ADHD, so this is where we just go off limits.

We debrief on the show and we talk shit. So you can't be mad at something that he said in this part of the show because it's not planned. It's not the real show. Thank you. I'm kicking off my open-toed sandals. 100%. Kick them off.

Is that a Greek? Did you buy that in Europe because that was the energy of the trip? No. These are from Rod and Gun. Oh. So these aren't from Greece. I was expecting you to go, oh, you know, I was in Nice and I had just been fucked by two American bodybuilders. And then I was walking through the streets and stopped off in a gorgeous little hole in the wall.

Oh, that's funny. Yeah, no, I didn't buy any lovely Grecian sandals. I've stuck to my rotten gun. And I also have some Adidas slides that I frequent. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. Well, you're a bit of a fashion boy. I do admire your looks.

You turn a look, Louis. You're very good at that. Do you know what? Thanks. Because I love fashion. But I don't know. Look, I wouldn't say that I have incredible fashion, but I love fashion. I think fashion's fun.

I agree with you. I don't think I've got a great sense of fashion, but I enjoy it, and I enjoy when someone else can put me in nice clothes, and I go, oh, I feel nice in these. But I could never. I don't have the eye. Oh, I don't have a brilliant eye to do it myself. Yeah.

Isn't that, I mean, how fun to have someone do it for you. Oh, my God, I mean, how fun to have someone do it for you? Oh my God. I know. I know. I'm having a, having a similar ish at the moment, um, in terms of an eye for styling. Um, I'm trying to fill in my place with furniture. We're talking art. We're talking, I don't fucking know what else you put in a fucking house. And I don't know what's happened to me but now that i've been you know given this position to be like okay i can i need to fill in an apartment slash house um i don't

know where to start oh my god well i i'm like i can help you so i do you live alone i live alone you live alone you got a big house right i see on your stories there's like a backyard and is there a trampoline there is a trampoline there is a backyard and a trampoline wow so your brain went i don't know if i need a couch not quite sure if i need a kitchen island but you know what i do need a trampoline absolutely say less say less i've lived in this house for about about a year now and it looks so fucking empty i'm embarrassed to have people over but then i just distract them by showing them My trampoline So smart

Do you ever have guys over and go Hey do you want to go out on the trampoline No because usually when they come over It's like 3am and then they're out by 4am 3am is late It's the devil's hour Louis that's really late Do you get horned up like bedtime

Sometimes it just hits you Yeah I know It's the devil's hour. Louis, that's really late. Do you get horned up, like, bedtime? Sometimes it just hits you. Yeah, I know. Really odd hours of the night. I know. You know, when it comes to your nine to five hours, or even just your before midnight, I'm dedicating that time to my nearest and dearest.

Of course, you're a family boy. There's places to be, there's people to see. And so then, you know, you get to a certain part of the night. It could be 3 a.m. Alcohol may have been consumed prior. Yeah, yeah, that gets me going. Yeah. Oh, doesn't it just? Doesn't it just?

No, one red, two red, I'm ready, I'm jumping on, I'm going to town. But three, no, I can't. It's like me in the shower. I can't, I can't have any more than three and five. Yeah, no way. I can't, I'm out. I can't. It's like me in the shower. I can't. I can't have any more than three and five. Yeah, no way. I'm out. I'm done. Is that just red wine or is that all alcohol?

All alcohol. All alcohol. No, two. Between two and three is my sweet spot of like ultimate horniness and fun. And then I'm in full control. But anything else and I just can't. Like I'm no good in the sack after three drinks. It's just like it's a tipping tipping point, drinking the third drink.

Are you okay? Can you do it with more than three drinks? Hell yeah. We're so cool, aren't we? We sound so hot. I'm like, I can't get erect in the shower. Also, if I have more than three yellow tail Shiraz's, my dick is like a wet rag. Oh, embarrassing. But, if I have more than three yellow-tailed Shiraz's, my dick is like a wet rag.

Oh, embarrassing. But, but, but. There's no but, Louis. It's embarrassing. You know what I worry about? I overshare and I say absolutely everything that happens in my life on this podcast. And I go, if it gets to a point with a guy, right, I'm leaning back now, if it gets to a point

with a guy where, you know, it's three, four, five dates in and you're going there could be something here they would listen to the pot if they had a podcast where they spoke about their life i'd want to listen to that show i'd want to hear them so i think someone is going to eventually hear this oh absolutely and it sounds like by the amount of people that you have fucked in recent times, they do listen. Yes, that's very true. No, but like a love interest, you know? My question to you is, should I stop? And should I not talk about any of this?

Because is it a turn off? Is it not endearing? No, I think you need to keep going. You need to persevere. Don't give up. Don't stop fucking. Because the joy, like even the joy i had in listening to um some of the past few episodes like they do say no they don't i was gonna say

the devil's in the details but like i mean they do say that i think yeah they do say that but i don't think that's what i wanted to say in that time but what i'm trying to say is like those little gems are the reason why the podcast is so good and you want to keep listening because you want to hear about all the specifics. Who wants to listen to an hour of people just being vague? No, true. Very true. So I think it's great.

And you're a great storyteller as well. So it just, it's stunning. Stop the compliments. Stop the compliments. I was going to say like, okay, if this is the special section of the show. Yeah. Nothing's off limits. And half of the listenership is gone.

Yeah. Fine. Sue me. I will be honest. Yes, I may be able to last, you know, after quite a few drinks. Many drinks, actually. However, comma, I will never come first. Oh.

Ever. And a lot of the time may never come. Oh my God. This is so interesting. This is so interesting. So are we talking drinks or this is just sex in general? We are talking in general, but exacerbated by drinks.

Absolutely. Do you have a preference? Like, are you, are you like, what, where, what's your preference? Are you Bowser? Are you Peachin? Well, you know, it's really, really funny. Or are you Yoshi? Are you Yoshi?

Which means, you know. You're kind of Yoshi at the moment. Okay. Oh, Yoshi boy. Okay. Yeah. You're popping of yoji at the moment. I'm a yoji boy, okay. Yeah. You're popping eggs out. Yeah, it was, I had this moment when I was looking at the two men in Nice

during our threesome and I went, I'm yoji. Because I used to, the past couple of years, I definitely used to be peach. Yes. But something's come over me now and I'm just just like, oh, like, love is love. Bodies are bodies. Do as you please. Yes, yes, yes. It's all about pleasure at the end of the day.

You be Bowser. And I'm sure you can attest to this. Or maybe not. Because you're, I'm assuming, pure Bowser vibes. But I look at someone and I go, I am Bowser. And then I'll look at someone else and I'll go, my fucking God, peach me up. Interesting. Interesting.

I'm yet, and I'm so open to it. I really am. But I am yet to have that feeling of, you know, save me from my castle, me and my little toad. Come and destroy me. I'm peach. I just haven't had that. I toad, come and destroy me, I'm Peach. I just haven't had that. I've never had that rush over me, you know? And if it does, I'm down for it.

But my energy very much lies in the Bowser of it all. You're scaling that castle. I am. I'm scaling the castle and I'm so envious of Mario and it's all I want. I just want a Bowser. But I'm in my um exploration era so who knows who knows I could peach it up and that's what it's all about I think I'd be more

of a shy guy if I was if I was in that environment I mean I don't know um if what part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe you fall but I I'd be a shy guy or like a Luigi like I'd go there but also I'd kind of be a bit coy about it because it'd be my, it'd be my real first time. And I have done it. I don't enjoy it, but it would be my, you know, it'd be early days for me in that territory. Yeah. And you know, when we flip the switch and you're in Bowser mode, you don't have to be coy and shy. You go, Oh my God, I believe I'm breathing fire. I'm breathing absolute fire. Back to, back to coming. Let's circle back to coming. Back to coming, Louis Hanson. Back to coming.

Welcome back to coming with Louis Hanson and Mitch Turi. Today we're talking volume and timings. My volume recently has been fantastic. I don't know why. Maybe because I'm drinking more water on my hot girl walks, and maybe I'm enjoying it more because it's hook-uppy. But the sheer volume, it's fantastic. Amazing. Yeah, it's really gooduppy. But the sheer volume, it's fantastic. Amazing.

Yeah, it's really good. A lot of TMI there. I often prefer to come second, but I will always get there. I'm pretty easy to get off. Do you struggle? Are you harder to get there? I think, yeah. Yeah.

And I think, though, the more over like, you know, over this past year, this gorgeous, gorgeous year, I have developed a, I'm not going to say regular roster, but there's like a couple people that, you know, we've slept with each other a lot of times now. And so, for me, maybe it's just the comfortability. now um and so for me maybe it's just the comfortability um and after a while like sleeping with someone for a few times something switches in me and it's like oh my god i'm like instant yes but i i would say more often than not if i am having a one night stand or if it's someone i don't know um i often find it hard to come interesting do you have a um like a anxiety yes are you medicated for that no do you have um like a worst hookup story is there one that you always tell or is there an experience that just mortifies you i mean yeah okay are you open to discussing yes okay yes it's a safe space but, I'm just going to start, and be kind of vague though.

It involves myself and another person. Uh-huh. It's a good start. Yep, thank you. I wasn't on a boardwalk at nighttime getting a blowjob. Okay. Two people, we were on a bed, and it is very sexy. Two people, we were on a bed and it is very sexy.

We start having sex and then all of a sudden we see blood everywhere. Oh, no. Yes. On the bed. On the bed. Oh. One of us, I will not disclose who, had a bit of an accident that involved blood. And the person that I was sleeping with, they had just gotten fresh Sheridan sheets that day,

like bought new ones. We're talking hundreds of dollars. Thread count through the roof, I can only imagine. Oh, and you know what? They felt superb, but they looked less superb with just blood everywhere. How much blood? How much like a dribbling, like a nosebleed amount of blood? It was enough for like a hand to be placed on the bus region to be lifted up and blood droplets were coming down on the fingers.

Oh, no. Okay. All right. Was there pain? Was whoever was hurt? and blood droplets were coming down on the fingers. Oh, no. Okay, all right. Was there pain? Was whoever was hurt? So whoever was experiencing this didn't feel that much pain. That's why it was a shock that it just came out of nowhere.

Yes. But from there, so we stopped. And he is the loveliest person. We had a bond. We had a connection. So it was a really sweet time. And I could imagine that being quite a mortifying experience. But yeah, that stays with me as like the train wreck sexual encounter. Oh God, that would be very frightening.

And the sheets. I mean, that's the real travesty of the situation. The sheets. I felt so bad if i was the one to have bled i would have felt so 100 felt so guilty so so guilty louis well i had um i met up with someone on the weekend and um i'm house sitting a friend's place in bondi and tell me if this is unethical am i a good friend or a bad friend i fucked on the couch of of house that I was house-sitting, and I messaged her, and she was unhappy. She was unhappy that I fucked on the couch. Stop!

Yeah, I didn't love the vibe that I fucked on the couch. Ooh! Because, firstly, ethical. Secondly, I would support anyone rooting on my couch. Thank you. And it was a beautiful chaise leather couch. And we got it on. And she said, don't use my bed.

So I didn't. So I used the couch. I thought it was fair game. That's lovely. Like the fact that you thought ahead to not use the bed but use the couch. I mean, you know, it's not a bed. It's a couch. Thank you.

I completely agree. Then they stayed the night. First time ever that someone stayed the night. Do you like inviting people to stay? No. Oh. Do tell. No.

I love. Okay. To all the idiots out there, I'm a lovely person, right? I'm a caring and affectionate person. However, comma, if it comes to just like a one night stand or just a situation where you're like, we both know what we're here for. I would prefer to go to their house, bada bing,

bada boom. And I'll leave. I'll be like done because I love to just wake up by myself. Yes. Okay. Fair. No. See,

I want to have like someone on my shoulder and cuddle and, but maybe that's because I'm out of a relationship. Maybe that will fade over time, but that's because that's probably the biggest thing that I'm missing is that intimacy. So maybe that's what I'm looking for at the moment. How did it feel? So good. Amazing. I loved it. Waking up next to someone. Yeah. Great. Really good. Really nice. And then like, like then we showered together.

It was absolutely lovely. Wow. Maybe I need to invite someone over. Maybe. Yeah. I should call him. You should call him and yeah, go, I go, I'll wash the sheets this time. Don't worry. Don't worry. All right.

Well, Louis, we better go. This was so much fun. I had the best time with you. Do you want to stay the night? Yeah, this was amazing. Yeah. Yeah. This was really, really fun.

We got naughty. We were so naughty. We were naughty boys. Did you think you were going to get this naughty? No. I didn't think I'd be talking about bleeding during sex. Three serms over debauchery. Got you.

Well, Louis, it was a pleasure having you on, hearing the conquests of Greece. Louis Hanson on all platforms is where people can find you? Yeah. I mean, just have a Google. Just see where the wind takes you. All right. Brilliant. We love you. And truly, I adore you, and I can't wait to hang out with you more in Melbourne. You just have a Google. Just see where the wind takes you. All right. Brilliant. We love you.

And truly, I adore you and I can't wait to hang out with you more in Melbourne. You're such a sweetheart. Thank you for filling in. I love you. Thank you for having me. Bye, idiots. See you, idiots. Idiots.

We'll see you next week. Coombs is back. Don't worry. And we'll see you next Monday. Oh, and we hope this podcast, this is how we sign off every week. We hope this podcast makes you feel at least 3% better today and then you say so we do amazing you have to say that so we do brilliant there we go well said so natural so we do see you next week see you louis i thought you were gonna lead me in oh we hope this podcast makes you feel at least three percent better today

so we do so good good. So good. See you, Louis. See you, idiots. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.