Is It Just Me? - #188: Titanic (Mitches Version)

Episode Date: February 27, 2024

Get ready for an emotional reenactment 💔🚢 PLUS Churi's big pitch!!   In this episode:  Churi’s beef with shoe shops (06:14) We need to normalise name tags (12:32) Our souvenir exchange (16:45) Reenacting the Titanic whistle scene (32:48) Churi’s big pitch (37:29) Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (52:25)   Join our Facebook group 'Endurant Idiots' facebook.com/groups/477062186470271 Hit us up: @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Hello you! Hello you! Go! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. In high school, I thought compulsory meant you had a choice, so my year advisor, Mrs Moyman, went,

oh no, Mitch Math is compulsory. I went, fantastic! I'll do two courses of drama. Now here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coombs. Hello, you. Hello, you. Oh, hello. How are you, Mitchell?

Not too bad. Have you seen my hands now that I don't bite my nails? Oh, yeah, hold on. Give us a closer look. They're so good. I'm not wearing my specs. You're going to look... You're going to be so impressed with my hands.

They're long. Yeah, that's big for you. I can scratch things. We've got to do something about them cuticles, but otherwise, all good. No, I had my first mani-pedi. Did you? Yeah, my first ever mani-pedi with my dad. With your dad?

Yeah, me and Mark. Men used to hunt. What the fuck? I know, the cheery men too. We were like European blooded. We are not meant for this. My dad's a salesman and I'm in fucking entertainment. And I was like, yeah, I'mery men too. We're like European blooded. We are not meant for this. My dad's a salesman and I'm in fucking, you know, entertainment. And I was like, yeah, I'm growing my nails.

He's like, let me treat you. He teared up. Let me treat you to a mini patty. It'd be my pleasure. I actually respect the fact that that was his idea. Does he get them himself? Dad gets a mini patty every month, once a month. That's fucking great.

He gets a massage and a mini patty on the same day. I love that. He took me to his local. We walk in and they all know Mark Cheery. Like, Mr. Mark, Mr. Mark, hello. And I'm like, hello. And then he's like, this is little Mark. And they're like, little Mark, little Mark.

He's like, he's my brother. They all laugh. They laughed. I've never had a manicure, but I'm thinking of getting one because like I like doing my own nails. Almost as a hobby, right? Yeah. But I kind of want to-

Show me yours. Look. Yeah. Did you French tip them or is that just what they look like? No, that's just how they are. Nice, cute. But I want to get a manicure just to watch how they do it so that I can up my own game. Yeah.

Because I like doing them myself, but I think I keep fucking it up a bit. Yeah, go so you can watch. You can sit there like I did with Dad. Look, we sat there and got our feet in the water. Like I've given myself ingrown fingernails. I didn't know that was possible. Oh, Mitchell. It's fine. They're fine now. I've had ingrown toenails, but never myself ingrown fingernails i didn't know that was possible mitchell yeah it's fine they're fine now i've had ingrown toenails but never an ingrown fingernail yeah there was one time i went a bit heavy on the um what do you call it filing filing yeah one time

i went a bit heavy on the filing and the buffing and whatnot i literally gave myself i think i counted four ingrown fingernails yeah oh too many that's four too many ingrown fingernails turns out you use your hands a lot yeah you do you do. And you feel the pain. Yeah. Careful where you go to because the place I went to, she laughed at me when I asked for shellac. What is that? It's like a gel. She finished and it was raw and I went, oh, I want gel.

She went, you want gel? I went, yeah, my sister's got shellac. She went, ha. I went, I want shellac. I want clear. I've got a bit of gel on mine. Yeah, so I've got crystal gel put on. I think it looks good.

I'm happy with it. Pricekeeper Jenna, our third wheel is here, of course. I don't think she'd be game to get her nails done. Well, speaking of nails, no, well, Jenna's nails, there's no machinery that can cut them. No, they're cat nails. Yeah, they're thick. If you're new here, she's got cat claws instead of human fingernails,

so they can't be cut short or they'll bleed. They have to be super long. You could cut them a little shorter than that. No, I do cut them a little bit, but then they hurt for like a week. Really? Yeah. That's all I can do. It's pretty incredible, to be honest.

It's just very Jenna, isn't it? It is the most Jenna thing in the world. It is. But we love you for all the abnormalities. Thank you. So I love my nails, but they kind of look like little French tips. Oh, it's such an awful experience, Mitchell. They get.

You know when you watch American movies and they shovel snow off a driveway? Picture that fingernail being your, that driveway being your fingernail. And they get this machine and just scoot the skin back like it's snow. That's what I want done. And they push it back and it hurt. My eye bled. Because I was thinking of getting one of those machines. But then I was like, no, I need to watch someone else operate it first.

You do. Because knowing me, I'd go in overly confident and then fuck my fingers right up. Yeah, you would. You need to get it done professionally. My cuticles are beautiful at the moment. They're very clean. And I was very impressed. They could be better with professional help, mind.

Yeah, of course. I take biotin, which is a vitamin to help thicken and grow your nails. And it works. Oh, and your hair as well. And my hair, yeah, and it works wonders. God, I just don't need to add to my already quite exorbitant vitamin regime. What do you take? All sorts of shit. Really?

I've got NeuroCalm Soothe. I've got Fibromag Active. I've got Meta B Complex. I've got Ultra Flora Meta Control. There's another one. Do you need to be on all these? They work, yes. Oh, okay, cool.

Especially the magnesium one. I take magnesium daily. The days that I don't take that, I really feel it in my bulging disc. I'll tell you what. Really? Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. Didn't all of our audience relate to the bulging disc?

Everyone on the Facebook group were like, bulging disc is your night. I was shocked at how many people were like, same. Yeah. I've got a bulging disc as well. But they also need to have lower back issues, which sounds even more painful. Yours is upper, yeah. Mine's the neck, yeah. Oh, God.

I did not think that was going to strike such a chord. Yeah. You can never predict it. A nerve. A nerve, yeah. Yeah, I would have said that. Well, listen, welcome to Is It Just Me? Every show we start the same way with idioms, something we've noticed, something we hate

or appreciate. Yep. We've got one each. We do. Mine. Oh, how do I explain this? This is probably like a socially awkward hack. Okay.

Cool. Well, that sounds like it's helpful. Mine is stupid. It's something that I've noticed and I think I'll go first because it really is just. Mine's something I appreciate. There you go. Oh, really? Oh, they're rare from you.

I think if someone were to count all the Ijjums that you've shown appreciation, it would be in the tens. Yeah. Really? Yeah. You probably could be true. A super fan out there will do the math. Yeah. And good luck with that task.

Mine's dumb and stupid. And it's just something that I noticed. We've got flying cars, you know. We really can be doing what I think we should be doing when it comes to this certain area of the world. Do we have flying cars? Yeah, yeah. You can get like cars that, not like commercial use, but they do exist. They're called planes, you know.

Yeah. You're right. I'm an idiot. Well, who's going first then? I'll go first. Let me get out of the way. Maybe Jenna should decide. We've both given some sort of tease as to what Aries It Just Me is.

I think the best should be last. So, Mitch, Churi, you can go first. Thanks a lot. Thank you. What a slap in the face. I thought I was your favourite. All right. Let's go.

I'll do my agent first. Let's start. Is it just me or? Should shoes really at this point in time be coming laced up? What? Like they should come to you laced up. I bought a pair of shoes and they weren't laced. Oh, as in like you had to buy your own laces?

No, the laces are in the box, but just tied in a little bow. The shoes weren't laced. The last time you bought it, they don't lace shoes. They come unlaced. I don't think I've ever bought a pair. Actually, I've not bought new shoes for a long time, to be fair, but I don't think I've ever had to lace them myself. No, I lace constant pairs of shoes.

My fingers are calloused. Usually when you try them on at the store, the assistant laces them. Yeah, laces them great. Really? Yes, Mitchell, yes. Where the fuck are you shopping? I've never had that. No, you wear slides and thongs, you know.

Not often. Really? I usually wear – I've had the same pair of converses from the sports section for like five years, and I never want to change them because they're not like fabric. They're like a fake leather. And so it's so easy to clean them. Yeah, right. Okay.

And so that's probably why it's been a while since I bought a new pair of shoes. No, Mitchell, they don't come laced and we have technology. AI can do it. Hire a machine that'll do it. Like build them laced. No one knows how to lay shoes because there's so many options you can do ring a ring left right left right up down up down i often have to relace them because there's nothing that fucking irks me more than the laces that are sort

of designed to tie them within the shoe so you can't see the lace what do you mean what do you mean that's like converses yes they usually come tied as such that you tie them up and then you tuck the laces away so you can't see the knot. Oh, I get you. And I don't know if it's a sensory thing, but that fucks me right off when I can feel the laces on the sole of my foot. I get you. Yes, I'm the same.

And so often I have to re-lace them anyway. Painful. I'm like, no way. I don't care if the knot on the outside looks shit. I'm doing that. Totally. I'm the same. Nothing worse.

Remember shoe fashion in like probably 2009, 2010 was to have a chunky tongue. Remember globe shoes? No. Globe. Globe shoes. Right. Okay. They just had fat tongues.

Were they like skateboarder shoes? Yes. All skater shoes. This. Look at the tongue on that. Yeah. They are. Look at them, Mitchell.

It was like an airbag. Remember those? Not really, but no, I know what you mean. And you'd tuck your jeans into the top of them. Oh God. Oh, God. Really? Yes. I wore these to my year six farewell.

I also had a pair of globe shoes that had heels, like wheels in them. They were like heelies. Oh, God. I always wanted them. That's how you'd wear them. The laces were not even keeping your foot in. So yuck. Yeah, they don't look comfy at all.

I would hate those. Not in the slightest. Shoe fashion's really come a long way now when you look at, like, the Yeezys and the slides and what Kanye's making. I'm going to have to take your word for it because I've not kept up. I've just been a converse girl from day dot and I still am. Have you not seen the new Yeezy shoe? I don't look into Yeezy shoes ever.

No, Mitchell. Have you ever noticed me wear anything other than my normal shoes? Mitchell in Yeezys. Well, I can imagine. You wouldn't read about it. I've got a pair. You can have an old pair of mine if you want. I don't think we're the same shoe size.

You didn't jump at that either. I thought, no, what are you? Nine. Oh, I'm a 13. No way. Yeah, exactly. I don't have big clown feet like you. Listen, they're proportionate to me.

No, I know. They work. These are the new Yeezys. I'm a size 13. It's called in proportion. Look, they're like a sock. I'm a size 13. It's called Improportion. Look. They're like a sock. Oh, they're horrific.

Why? And the heel is just a sock on top, but the bottom is heel. Oh, he's just plain silly buggers now. What the fuck's up with that? That's silly. That's silly. You look like an alien. It's like an alien foot. No, not good.

That's really silly. No, that Kanye is stupid. It's literally like just wearing a sock. I agree. Your fashion's dumb. I've ordered three pairs in all colours. Of course you have. See, I wish I could benefit from your shoe fetish because you must go through so many

and get rid of so many. Yes. But I can't because you're a size 13. What size shoe is your partner, Sean? Like a 10 or 11. Oh, so you could in theory share. Yeah. Yeah, see that.

It's a bit of a squeeze. I have to wear extra socks. Yeah. See, that was the one issue. That's really what drove us apart in the end with my ex. Yeah, see that. It's a bit of a squeeze. I have to wear extra socks. Yeah. See, that was the one issue. That's really what drove us apart in the end with my ex. I, that, the shoes. You couldn't share shoes. Couldn't share shoes.

Do you not have enough of your own shoes? Yeah, but we both loved fashion. So it was very handy for him to buy something nice and then we could share it. But it never worked. And also I was very much bigger than him. So he could wear all my clothes as oversized, but I couldn't wear his t-shirts. I could wear them as a handkerchief if I needed but that's all. Do you reckon he could wear your clothes as oversize? He always did, yeah.

Really? Because when I was at Taylor Swift in Melbourne, you know how you saw all over the news that people were queuing up for merch days before the show? I saw that. Days before the show. This actually is a question I want to ask, yeah. Like me. I did. Oh my god Jenna did! And I wish I'd, yeah. Like me. I did. Oh, my God, Jenna did.

And I wish I'd known that you were going because I would have asked you to get me a shirt because I rock up to the stadium fucking 15 minutes before the show starts and I'm like, oh, my God, there's a sucker born every minute, isn't there? There's no queue for the merch whatsoever. I'm going to Waltz up and get myself a shirt. And they said, hi, we've only got 4XL and up left. Oh, I'll be fine then. And they said, hi, we've only got 4XL and up left. Oh, I'll be fine then.

And I said, okay. Is it like tight for a 4XL? They said, no, they're all quite baggy. I was like, right, okay, never mind. I thought maybe I could get away with the oversized look, but no, they're baggy for a 4XL. An extra small is baggy. Really?

They're big. Good on Taylor being size inclusive. What a queen. I love her. Can't wrong her. Never say a bad thing about her. Jenna, what did you get? What merch did you haul?

I got a t-shirt and then a few people here wanted t-shirts, so I got that for them. Damn it, I wish I knew. Why didn't you message us, your two closest friends? Because I decided on the day and they only knew because I was leaving early. Fair. And I got two jumpers. Fair.

Yeah. Well, I didn't pay for my tickets, so I'll buy merch. It seems fair. I don't know if you're going to get much. If they have a small or medium shirt left, please just- Oh, do you want one? Help a bitch out. What era?

Just the eras to a shirt. Because I have a black t-shirt from every concert I've been to, except this one. Oh, I'll get you one. Don't be daft. I don't like your chances, but like- I mean, I hate to gloat, but I'm in Taylor's personal management box. So I feel like I might even get a shirt on arrival. I might get a goodie bag. I think I might go piss with Travis Kelsey. You're in Taylor's box with your fat tongue, are you? Oh, that's awful. As soon as you mentioned the big tongue

on the shoes, I was like, I've got to weave this in. Then I mentioned Taylor's box and there it was. There it was. On a silver platter. Anyway, where was the original engine? I don't know. Shoes. Pretty awesome. Okay. No worries. Are you ready for my engine?

No. Now I am. Is it just me or? Do we need to normalise the name tag? Oh, I can get behind this. I like that. Yeah. Because you know that I'm shocking with names. and it's not like I don't try.

I feel like it's an anxiety thing where I'm more worried about getting it wrong so I choose to just not say it. Correct. Yeah, I get that too. Like I'm the opposite of you where you just confidently say any name. Yeah. You're like, yeah, you're Jeff. Yeah.

Well, I often find people are just happy that you've had a punt. No, but like if you got my name wrong, I often find people are just happy that you've had a punt. No, but if you got my name wrong, I would be convinced that I was wrong. You say it with such confidence. I do. I do, Ryan. But I went to a dance rehearsal for Mardi Gras recently because I'm doing the dance part of the parade. You two aren't.

No, Jenna and I are just walking. We're walking. And so I went and Sean brought name tags. doing the dance part of the parade you two aren't no jenna and i just walking yeah walking and so i went and sean brought name tags actually he spotted them at my place because it was the same stickers that i used to put everyone's address on our mugs when we sent them out yes yes yes yes um he spotted them and goes can i take these to rehearsal and i was like sure go for gold yeah and it was actually so helpful because something about reading the name as well as hearing it, it just sinks in.

There was one lady at the rehearsal who a few times has done like a Northern Beaches queer yoga by the water. I've met her numerous times. I know her name and yet it just hadn't sunk in. But now that I've read it on her tits. And said it. I can say with full confidence her name's Oh no, I think it's Alex.

Oh fuck, see it's happened again. It's your own theory. My doubt has crept in. Just say it confidently and we'll believe you. I'm pretty sure it's Alex. Yeah, it's Alex. Fuck, I hope I'm wrong. But yeah, it did sink in because I read the name tag and then it was just so much more helpful. We need to normalise it. Everyone should wear name badges. I agree. I think we should wear name badgesise it. Everyone should wear name badges. I agree.

I think we should wear name badges. People in life should wear name badges. You know where they wear name badges? Retirement homes. Do they? I go to my nan's place and it's so nice because an old woman, an old person, love when you know them by their name. So I go, hello, Betty, how are you? And they love it.

But then what happens if Betty's a bit old-fashioned and goes, excuse me, it's Mrs Smith to you. Yeah, of course. Don't call me by my first name. My husband, I've been widowed for 10 years. I will always be Mrs. Smith. Only Mark could call me Betty. Of course.

No, I feel like they'd specify. Or it would be like, you know how pronouns are they slash, pronouns are they slash them. It'd be Betty slash Mr. Smith, Mrs. Smith. Especially old people. They seem to have like ridiculous nicknames that have nothing to do with their full name. It's not like his name's Matthew, but we call him Matt. It's like everyone calls him Bill, but his real name's fucking Jeremy.

How do they connect at all? Yeah, yeah, yeah. There's no link. I agree. Bev, Beverly, amazing. Richard and Dick, sure. Makes sense. It's a stretch, but sure.

Robert and Bob, I don't get. Sorry. Even then, you've, but Shaw. Robert and Bob, I don't get. Sorry. Even then, you've heard enough times. Rob, Bob. But it's got to have something to do with the name. There's a lot of long bows happening. Yeah, you're right. It's like, oh, this is my Auntie Petunia, but everyone calls her Ruth.

What for? Why? Well, my nan's name is Kissy Calera, but we call her to Claire. What's her name? Kissy. And then what's the rest of it? Calera. Is that her last name? No. Kissy Calera Macbeth is her name? Kissy. And then what's the rest of it? Calera. Is that her last name?

No. Kissy Calera Macbeth is her name. First name. Kissy Calera is her first name. Macbeth is her surname. That's a cool name. Claire comes from that. That makes sense.

Calera, I guess. Yeah. A lot of syllables in there. Calera. Yeah, I could have been Mitch Macbeth. That's my family's name. My second name. My mum's Michelle Macbeth.

Really? Yeah. Isn't that cool? You could absolutely change your name to's my family's name. That's cool. My mum's Michelle Macbeth. Really? Yeah. Awesome. Isn't that cool? You could absolutely change your name to your mum's maiden name if you wanted to. Well, I thought about it before I started in the industry, but I had a theatre director because my roots are in the arts. And I had a director say, you cannot be Mitch Macbeth because Macbeth is the Scottish play.

Oh, you'd be typecast. Well, yes. And let's not pretend you'd make a good Macbeth. I'd be terrible Macbeth. Lady Macbeth, though. Different story. But Macbeth, you can't say in the theatre it's bad luck. That means the show will be cancelled and someone will die in the theatre.

What? Yeah. So he's like, you use Macbeth, young boy, and you'll never work a day in your life. Wow. So I stuck with Cheery, and I've never worked a day in the theatre in my life. Thanks a lot, Dick Richard. Is it just me? You can follow the show online, just search Couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead. All right, at last, we're

finally giving each other souvenirs. Oh my God. You've been back from your holidays, both of you, for quite some time and you keep forgetting to bring your bloody souvenirs in. I know, it's been five, six weeks for me. How long for you, Jenna? Almost two months. Wow. But I'm glad we held off because that meant I got the chance to buy you souvenirs in Melbourne. Oh, isn't that cute?

So Mitch went to Melbourne for the Heiress Tour. I went to Europe for my little solo single travel experience and Jenna went on a cruise ship for Elderly. Yes. And as we've just discussed, getting Heiress to emerge at the Taylor Swift show, not easy. So don't get your hopes up. Your souvenirs have nothing to do with Taylor Swift. I thought you were just about to say,

we just spoke about it, but guess what? I've got you. No, no, I wish. I wish. Well, who wants to go? I could have gotten you a 4XL. You could have. 4XL would be over.

I'm a 2XL now. Anyway, it doesn't matter. It doesn't matter. Do you want to go first, Mitchell? Because I reckon, oh, actually, the order of, why don't we go It doesn't matter. Do you want to go first, Mitchell? Because I reckon... Oh, actually, the order of... Why don't we go in the order of the poll that we put on the group? Or the order of, like, who bought them first?

Because mine's very fresh. Oh. Mine's fresh off the fucking teal, mate. Oh, then we'll do yours then. Last, I meant. Oh, okay. In order of who got them first. Oh.

All right, well, when did I get mine? It would have been January. Early January. Mine was end of December. So I'll go first. I think that means Jenna goes first. Guys, this is a stupid metric. Do you understand chronological order?

Yeah, but it wasn't chronological. That was like time, date. No, December comes before January, famously. I've never understood on your computer when it's like, sort by last created. I'm like, what do you mean? Last modified. Like, if I created a new Word document in 2015 and then I created another one in

2016 and I said, sought by last created, the oldest one would be at the bottom. And then when does, why is December involved? Because that's when Jenna bought them. I got it first. Yeah. So I'm second. Yes. Okay, I'm happy with that.

Yeah, yeah. Do you understand it goes December, then January. Listen, I'm good at playing music. It's the new year. I understand it's tricky. That's all I'm good at, guys. Yes. Okay, I'm happy with that. Yeah, yeah. Do you understand it goes December, then January? Listen, I'm good at playing music. It's the new year. I understand it's tricky. That's all I'm good at, guys. Yeah. Jenna was on a tropical holiday, so Jenna gets the tropical gift-giving music.

Here we go. I'm excited. So where did you go to, Jenna? So I went to Vanuatu, Fiji, and New Caledonia. And these gifts are from New Caledonia. Charming. New Mia. And I got are from New Caledonia. Charming. So, Numia. And I got it on Christmas Day at the Numia Market.

I didn't actually clock that you spent Chrissy overseas. Yes. Fun. Yes. So, these Christmas Day Numia Markets. They were open on Christmas Day? Yes. Wow.

What else is happening in Numia? Well, that was the only thing open. Not enough questions were asked about Old Mia. There was a good one. Okay. God, you know how to command a room. Hurry up. Doc, tell people what you're doing. Oh, God.

Give it to you both. How did this get through customs? Thank you. There was no customs. It was a cruise ship. Okay, tell us when. There you go. It's in a bubble wrap. Oh, this is cute. Oh, Jenna. Oh, God. Look is cute. Oh, Jenna. Oh, God. Look at that. Yes, handmade.

How do I even describe this? It was. It was. So it's a bottle opener magnet, but it's not any old fucking bottle opener. It's like a hollow whale of sorts and it's got little bits inside. It's got like potpourri in there.

It's a transparent dolphin. Mine's got a seahorse, some shells, and then an orange little bits inside. It's a dolphin. It's got like potpourri in there. It's a transparent dolphin. Mine's got a seahorse, some shells and then an orange branch inside it. From New Year. These are very, very gorgeous. Yes. Look at that. It's magnetic, Mitchell. Yeah, I've got one just like this that I bought myself in Darwin.

It's on the fridge. It's a crocodile. Oh, cute. Now a dolphin. Look, I could pin this on my microphones, Mitchell. They're metal. The magnet's not that strong. Mine's going to fall off. For the whole show, I'm going to have a dolphin.

Me too. On my mic. I'm going to call mine Amelia. Nice. Oh, after who? Well, it's like Princess Diaries. They call her Mia. Yeah.

New Mia. Funny. New Amelia. Yes. I'm going to call mine Wiley. Oh, cute. I thought it was a dolphin. It is. Dolphy. Yes. I'm going to call mine Whaley. Oh, cute. I thought it was a dolphin. It is. Dolphy.

Finn. He's a boy because he's blue. This is Finn. Oh, this is really cute, Jenna. Thank you for that gift. I like that. If anyone needs to open fucking bottles in my house, it's the place to be. I've got so many now. My parents got me one from their trip as well. Mitch, I got a case of Heineken. Yeah, just get

the whale in the top drawer. It's a dolphin. All right, am I ready? Well, that's more a question for you. Sorry, that was more a thought. There's no one better to answer that than you. Correct. Are you ready?

Well, mine are all from Germany. And mine was stolen, apparently. Well, yes, yes, I'll get there. Jenna's was stolen. Now, let me get it out. Actually, I lie. Jenna's is all from Germany. That's not like you. Jenna's is all from Germany.

Mitchell, yours is from the Netherlands, my hometown. Okay. Where the cheery lineage begins. Oh, my God. Is it a fucking joint? No. I couldn't bring that back for you. You could have if you really wanted to.

You could have shelved that bitch. I'll start with you, Jenna. Okay. So, Jenna gets two gifts. Close your eyes. I got Jenna the limited edition season marketing book. Hands out. For Berghain.

For Berghain, the club that I went to. Oh, and there's a cat. Yeah, because there's a cat on there. I thought of you straight away. Why don't you open it up and tell people? You got her a pamphlet. No, no, no. You have to buy these.

Oh, this is disturbing. I bet you stole it. No, no, no. This is the one you stole. No, I, no. You have to buy these. Oh, this is disturbing. But you stole it? No, no, no. This is the one you stole? No, I purchased this. Jenna gets two gifts as well. Oh, the photos on it are just... I wasn't prepared for that.

This is the club that I spent three hours in. Allow me to describe it, Jenna. I don't know if you'd be able to process it. Well, there are seven images, Mitchell. What are all the seven? A hole pic, a moot pic, someone jerking, someone sucking. Correct. Jenna, hold it up

I'll put this on the Facebook group No I don't think you should Wait the hole's covered Move the mic Yeah so that is Burgheim The club that I spent my night in And I thought you'd love that

Yeah I'd love it I also Jenna In my time in Berlin Considering you had so much To do with its erection Stole you some of the Berlin Wall No way. What?

Are you serious? Really? You did not. No, I actually did. Oh. Fuck. So many memories. Is that going to be like when I was in Uluru and apparently people that held themselves

to a bit of the rock and take it home end up sending it back with an apology letter because they're cursed. No. By having stolen some of the rock. They've got this whole section at Uluru of all the people that have returned their bit of the rock that they stole because they're like, oh, the bad karma has been fucked. No. No.

Because the destruction of the wall was liberating for the people. Oh, that's true. And also they sell the wall. You can buy bits of the wall. So I was going to buy Jenna a piece of the wall, but all it was was a bit of the wall just in, it's like pebbles in a jar. And I went, I don't reckon this is actually fucking wall. I reckon this is just from some field in the middle of Berlin.

So I went up to the wall and I kicked it and I had these big fuck off boots on and that came flying off. Oh, this is cool. And I just looked around, bent down and got it. Wow, okay. It's from the Berlin wall. There is wall everywhere. I kind of chipped a bit off.

So you stole a bit of an old ruin for her. Correct, yeah. Oh, that's so cool. You like it? Yeah, I really love it. It's from the Berlin Wall. There is wall everywhere. I kind of chipped a bit off. So you stole a bit of an old ruin for her. Correct, yeah. Oh, that's so cool. Do you like it? Yeah, I really love it. Well, you were so involved with its construction, you really championed for it. Yeah, I did. But I was also part of the destruction as well. Correct. Alright, Mitchell, your gifts now.

So the first gift is from the Netherlands. Oh, I've got more than one. Yeah, you get two. Okay. Mitchell, in your house, in your tour more than one. Yeah, you get two. Okay. Mitchell, in your house, in your tour, is water off a duck's clit. Yes. And you have a collection of rubber duckies. I do. In your house.

All through the Netherlands, there are little duck stores. What for? I don't know. Like, it's their national thing. Wow. And I went, that's really weird. So I thought, I'm going to get Mitchell a Netherlandish duck for his duck collection. To add to my collection. To add to his duck collection.

However, then I went to the Rijksmuseum, which is a museum centred around the Rijk. Which is what? Well, there's Rijk and Wrong. Oh, my God. It's like Drake and Josh. Anyway, I saw this. It's one of the most famed pieces of art.

It's actually called Debreguise Zwan, which in English translates to The Threatened Swan from 1650 by John Asselin. So close your eyes. A threatened swan. They're not actually the same as ducks, but anyway. Oh, my God. Can I see? It's a real, it's a threatened swan.

You can hear that photo. That thing is going, oh, my God. You can. That's actually perfect. Oh, wow. Now, in the museum, that is about the size of a flat screen TV, and it's up there with Van Gogh as the most viewed piece. That is a famous swan.

I see. Wow. And it can just sit next to your ducks in your house. Beautiful. Thanks. It's a magnet. There's nothing metallic next to my duck collection, but that's okay. You can just lean it up against the television.

No, pop it on the fridge along with Amelia. It's all good. Now, I also, Mitchell, went to Paris, France, which of course is the birthplace of all designer items, and I walked past Louis Vuitton, and I thought, my budget too much for Mitchell. I thought Louis was just full Aussie. Louis Vuitton. Louis Vuitton. And I walked past Prada, and I thought, uh-uh.

Walked past Balenciaga, it went too much. Prana. Balenciaga, it went too much. Prana. Balenciaga. Then I saw Yves Saint Laurent and I thought, that's my budget. Right. Designer, but I can afford it. And I walk in, I go, what can I get my dear friend, Mitchell, one of my oldest friends? And I said, do you have anything around this price range?

And she went, oui, oui, comme over here. I went, okay. She showed me a cabinet and she said, this is the first ever Yves Saint Laurent store in the world.. Oh, okay. She showed me a cabinet and she said this is the first ever Ecentleron store in the world. Oh, okay. First ever. Flagship. She said, so it's the only store that we sell these items.

So I purchased you this, Mitchell. It's in a bag. It's fine. It's in a bag. Oh, fuck. Where'd it go? There it is. What is it?

What does it say on the front? Did it fall out? I'd love to tell you what it says on the front. Oh, no. Of the gift. Of the gift. Oh, right. It's very small. Is it in there? Yeah. It says no, of the gift. Oh, right. It's very small.

Is it in there? Yeah. It says St. Laurent, Paris. Correct. It's from St. Laurent. Okay. It's a little cardboard thing. Oh, my God.

What is it? What am I going to do with that? It's a fucking designer condom. The only place in the world where you can get 40 euro dollar condoms. How much did that cost Aussie dollars? 40 euro. I'll do the conversion. It was 40 euro.

Well, it's designer, Mitchell. I'd feel guilty ever using it if it's fancy and expensive. 65 Australian dollars. Fucking a 65 dollar dinger. You're kidding. There you go. Wow. I just don't want you to get sick or anything.

Or pregnant. Well, Sean and I are trying. Yeah, so. It's designed. I'm not sure what we're doing wrong. Is it leopard print or something on it? Yeah, it's leopard print. Wow.

I've not opened it. Do you want me to open the con? No, don't. Save it for a rainy day. Yeah, don't waste it. Or tomorrow night. I'll save it for my next affair. Yeah, good call.

Anyway, all the way from Paris. Enjoy, guys. Wow. Fascinating. Yeah. Anyway, all the way from Paris. Enjoy, guys. Wow. Fascinating. Yeah. So much history. So much history. Yeah.

You guys are welcome. Yeah, thank you. I'm going to say that I'll probably get the most use out of Janet's souvenir for me, the bottle opener. All right, Mitchell, your turn. All the way from Melbourne. All the way from Melbourne. So, as I mentioned, I couldn't get anything from the Taylor Swift show.

No, you tried. But there was something else I went to in Melbourne. Any guesses? Something else. Did you go to the art gallery, the NGV? Is it a TV show? No. Well, he brought back the cast of Cheers.

Getting warmer, though. TV show. Is it? Because I know what she's thinking. I also went to Ramsey Street where they film Neighbours. It's not actually called Ramsey Street. Oh, Kath and Kim's house. You got a brick from their home.

No. It's been demolished. You would have gone shopping. You would have gone to a restaurant. Have you seen the replacement house that they've. Oh, Kath and Kim's house. You got a brick from their home. No. It's been demolished. You would have gone shopping. You would have gone to a restaurant. Have you seen the replacement house that they've put where the Kath and Kim house was? Is it awful? Oh, it's hideous. Anyway.

I really don't know. Okay. Well, I'll give you your gift first, Cherry. Oh, wow. Close your eyes. I'm just going to pop it in your hand and then you can open it and tell everyone what you're seeing. Oh, this is exciting.

Sounds big. Ready? Thanks. Here we go. Oh, this is exciting. Sounds big. Ready? Thanks. Here we go. Oh, that's cool. Actually, guess without looking, just based off the feel of it, what is that? It's really cool.

It's a dog toy. It's a boat. A submarine. It's a Titanic. Bingo. Oh, my God. Are you serious? It's a Titanic bath toy. Oh, my god! Are you serious? It's a Titanic bath toy. Oh my god!

I guessed it! Yay! Oh my god, where'd you get this from? The Titanic exhibition they've got in Melbourne at the moment. Oh wow! The Titanic exhibition. Sean and I are both kind of Titanic nerds, so we fucking loved it. Oh my god. And for you, Jenna. No way! What did Jenna get? The whistle!

The whistle The whistle No don't blow it Don't blow it Why? Because I have a dumb idea Okay For those that have seen Titanic Oh no don't

You know the scene where she blows the whistle? Yeah Rose in the sea Yes And the sound of that whistle is just burnt into my memory So I would love to know if that whistle sounds the same as the one in the movie Right I think we should recreate the scene I think you're so right Yeah So I would love to know if that whistle sounds the same as the one in the movie. Right.

I think we should recreate the scene. I think you're so right. Yeah. I'm so glad we're on the same page. I think you're so right. Wait, okay, Jenna, show it to me. I don't buy it, but that's the whistle. The whistle that she blows to get the lifeboat.

1912. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I've got like the soundtrack so we can recreate it, but maybe we should watch the real scene first. I think we have to watch it. Yeah. I don't even know what you'd search on YouTube for that. Would it be like- Whistle scene Titanic surely would do the trick.

This is amazing. Maybe. Let me have a look. Mitchell, so kind. So what is in it? Is it just the bits of the Titanic in the exhibition? Well, I was a bit sceptical because they had, like, things that had been recovered from the wreckage down the bottom of the fucking ocean.

Oh, that's cool. And there were these plates that were supposedly recovered from the Titanic. And I'm like, they're looking real clean for plates that were apparently discovered a long time after it. Because they didn't go down to the actual wreckage until many years after the sinking. Yeah, of course.

And so these plates that are in perfect condition, they were looking very clean. And they were also selling them in the gift shop. So I was not convinced. They weren't real, Sean. Look what I got myself from the gift shop. Sean said, oh my God, that is in such poor taste, but you have to get it. My God. It's an ice cube tray where you can have your own fucking icebergs.

That's brilliant. Oh, Mitchell, that's shocking. That is so good. Isn't that so off? Did you buy, that's so good. I got it for myself. I haven't yet. Oh, that is good.

I actually forgot that I had them. They're in the gift bag. Oh, that's really funny. So this is the scene with the whistle. Shall we watch it? Yeah. I'll just skip to the whistle bit. So obviously the lifeboats have come back.

She's got to let Jack go. He's carked it in the water. Yeah, he's drowning. Down you go, Leo. See you. And then she's like, fuck me, I can't use my voice. Yeah. So I'm going to have to swim over to this clown that has a whistle in his mouth

and start blowing that so that the lifeboat comes back for me. And she's surrounded by corpses. Yep. So this is the sound that I'm hoping that whistle is bang on. It's a different shape. I'm not hopeful. Don't. Come about!

I think you should be that guy in the scene. Come about. He's got an accent. What is that accent? He's like, hello, is there anyone alive out there? I think it's be that guy in the scene. Come about. Yep. He's got an accent. What is that accent? He's like, hello, is there anyone alive out there? I think it's Scottish or Irish. Yeah, okay. Can you do that accent?

Yeah. All right, well, you're going to have to do that. I've just been there, yeah. Maybe I will be Rose. Yep, that's only right. You will be the guy on the boat looking for life. I haven't got many lines, but that's all right. There's actually not a lot of dialogue in this scene.

True, it's more about the emotion. She can't fucking talk and he's dead. True, true. And then Jenna will be the whistle. The whistle. My whistle double. Okay. Maybe pull that thing out of the packet so you can get a real good blow there, Jenna. Yeah. Alright, we ready? Yep. Alright, this is the first time I've seen Jenna blow. Are you familiar with this

scene? Yeah, of course. I re-watched this recently. Okay. Okay, I'm ready. The aircon's also at 16 fucking degrees. It's freezing in here. I am actually freezing in here. At the exhibition there was this big ice block that you put your hand on and it said, see how long you can hold your hand on this bit of ice?

And then there's a sign that says, by the way, the ocean was actually five times colder than this on the night. And oh, it was fucking freezing. I couldn't hold my hand on there for more than a few seconds. All the poor things. So no wonder Jack froze to death. Yeah, Jack Frost. Alright, we ready? freezing. I couldn't hold my hand on there for more than a few seconds. Oh, the poor things. So no wonder Jack froze to death. Yeah, Jack Frost. All right, we ready? Yep.

Here we go. That's your line. Is anyone alive out there? Can anyone hear me? Jack. Jack. Is there anyone alive out there? Jack. Jack Jack Is there anyone alive all the way Jack?

Jack Jack Jack There's a boat, Jack. Jack. Is there anyone alive? Is there? Come back. Come back. Come back. Come back. Hello.

Hello. Can anybody hear me? Come back. Hello. Come back. I'll never let go. I promise. See you, mate.

Naturally, I'm gutted. Yeah. In the water I go. Where's that clam with the whistle? Ready, Jenna. What? Oh, you're fucking kidding me. I think you're holding the entry point.

That is so anticlimactic. Can you suck? Oh, my God. What a rip-off. That's defunct That's broken Okay I think we've got it If you listen carefully it sounds just like The one from the movie

My squeaky My bath toy makes a better whistle than that That used to squeak Really? What's happened to my gifts? Try it. Jenna. It's still not quite right, but that's what it's meant to sound like.

Go again. I'm going to rewind. I should have just played both roles. Rewind. Rewind. No. I'm rewinding. Shut the fuck up I see Bit loud love

Wow Jenna you So what that proved Is that Jenna I see it. Bit loud, love. Wow. Jenna, you've... And seen. So what that proved is that Jenna would have died if she had a whistle. I'm not going to lie. I'm a bit lightheaded. It took a lot to make that noise. Try again, Jenna.

Yeah, let me try again. Shocking. That still just doesn't sound like the one in the movie, does it? No, it doesn't. The one in the movie looks like a netball whistle with a ball in it. No, it doesn't. The one in the movie looks like a netball whistle with a ball in it. Jenna, block your nose and just like punch it all out of your mouth.

That's a bit better. Gee, I thought with my history of vaping, I had shit lung capacity. But listen to this. Your lung capacity sucks. I have asthma. Oh, sorry. Don't we all? Okay, we get it.

Can I try? I don't know why you're ever going to need that, but I just thought of you for some reason. Can I try? I love it. Let me try. I love it. Jenna. See, Jenna, maybe that's the key.

Try and fill your cheeks with air. Yeah, but you also have to imagine that you're freezing. That is so funny that Jenna can't use a whistle. Jenna would have died. Can you whistle like normally? No. Oh, that's why. You would have been dead.

Wow. Imagine her trying to play bagpipes. She'd be fucked. Okay, that's enough, please. That's enough, thank you. I can play the flute. No, we're okay. I think we're fine. Well, scene, everyone.

Well done. Why did you buy it for? It's like when you buy a child a enough. Thank you. I can play the flute. No, we're okay. I think we're fine. Well, scene, everyone. Well done. Why did you buy it for? It's like when you buy a child a ball. I know. We're going to have to confiscate it. No, it's mine. No, we're done. Thank you, Mitchell. Lovely gifts. You're welcome. Stop. Jenna's got two historical pieces. She's got a Titanic whistle and a piece of the Berlin Wall. Yes.

Should we actually get the speech and knock down that wall and you can recreate the speech? Yes. Get the audio on YouTube? We don't have the time. Is it just me? The rude shocks of young adulthood. All right, the moment everyone has been waiting for.

Name one person. Craig, message me as a listener. Paul, Bev. See, it's confident. You just make up names and people believe they exist. That's true. And Bev is, of course, short for Margaret. Yeah, message me. He's a listener. Paul. Bev. See, it's confident. You just make up names and people believe they exist. That's true. And Bev is, of course, short for Margaret. Yeah, of course.

And when I mean Paul, I mean Daisy. We are doing the big pitch. Now, Mitch pitched last week here on the show. I mean, you can talk about it. It was your pitch. I don't want to steal your thunder. Yeah, I asked if you guys wanted to join the Mardi Gras parade with me. And we are.

And my darling Sean is organising it. Of course I spoke to Sean about it today. So did Jenna. Yes. And I'm sure that there are some idiots out there listening that might be a bit sus on whether you're going to pull out or whether you're actually committing. I'm as shocked as anyone that you're actually doing it. It wasn't just for on-air purposes.

I thought that you were going to turn the mics off and go, no, I can't actually do it. I never. But it's actually happening. They're locked in. I'm excited. It's happening. I've got plus two. I'm ready. I'm excited and go, no, I can't actually do it. But it's actually happening. They're locked in. I'm excited. It's happening. Yeah, I got plus two. I'm ready.

I'm excited to go. Jenny, you'll be there? Yeah. I don't pull out. It's going to be a hard pitch to top, mate. You reckon? Yeah. I do.

I've never struggled topping. Not my strongest. Well, you had a strong pitch and the team loved it. Are you guys ready for my pitch today? Yeah. Sure. It is for a new segment here on the show. Would you like the title of the segment?

Or would you like me to tell you what it is first? It's your pitch, mate. It is my pitch, true. I just get nervous because I think you're not going to end up liking it and then you're going to both laugh at me and then I'm going to be an idiot. Hey, have some faith in your pitch. Yeah, true. Okay.

Well, my pitch is a segment. You know how we do segments here? Yes, sometimes. And you know how we do segments here? Yes. Yeah. Sometimes. And you know how we're a show? That's true. The idea that I brought to the table is a new game called Will It Block? Yeah. Will It Block?

That's a good opener. Okay. Thank you so much. Are we talking about internet stalkers and you block them? No. The TV show The Block. No. Scotty Cam.

I did reach out to Scotty Cam and Shelley Craft and they both don't want to hear from me again. However, my segment will it block is different. It comes off the back of Lindt Chocolate announcing for Easter this year, they have blocked the famous Lindt Chocolate bunny. What? Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean? Okay. So famous Lindt chocolate bunny. What? Wait, wait, wait. What do you mean?

Okay. So the Lindt chocolate bunny, famed Easter chocolate in Australia. The little gold ones that has the necklace on it. Yeah, it's got a little red bell on it. Iconic. And it's everyone's favorite chocolate because it's thick. The ears are thick. Don't put words in my mouth.

It's not my favorite. It's delicious. Red tulip or nothing. But anyway. We've had this debate on the show. I like Lindt. They've turned it into a chocolate block. Squares. That's boring. Isn. I like Lindt. They've turned it into a chocolate block. Squares.

That's boring. Isn't it just Lindt chocolate? Yeah. Do they have normal blocks of chocolate in Lindt? Yeah, but it's not the bunny. It's just Lindt chocolate. It's very thin. So what's the fucking difference?

Is this your point? That's my point. Right, okay. They're blocking anything. So then in my investigation for this pitch, I and my team walked through the aisle at Coles and Woolworths. Do you know that there is a Crunchy Block? Crunchy's a chocolate bar.

Yeah. You know there is a Milo Block? Milo is a malted drink for children. Yeah, but Milo do their own version of everything. They've got bloody Milo cereal bars. They've got fucking Milo Kit Kats. You name it. But you know what there isn't?

There's not a Snickers Block. Why? Because it couldn't be blocked. You There's not a Snickers block. Why? Because it couldn't be blocked. You couldn't block a Snickers. Too much nougat, too much nut. Because the filling just wouldn't work. Correct. So my theory is, my big pitch is we each list our favourite bar,

chocolate bar, and then I have invested. I've already bought the machinery, so I hope you say yes to this. I've invested in a blocker and you put the chocolate bar in it and it turns it into a block of chocolate. Are we in or are we in? Will it block? So things that don't already have an existing block. Correct.

Okay. Because let's just brainstorm here and now. Do you not think that a snicker would make an incredible block of chocolate? The nut, the creamy caramel, chocolate in a little square form. I'd break three squares off at a time and I'd down that. I've got to say, sometimes they don't quite translate though. Yes, like? Well, like, I remember one year, because as I've mentioned before,

Cherry Ripe's my favourite chocolate, right? And one year my parents got me a Cherry Ripe Easter egg. Oh, because they make the famous chocolate bars into eggs for Easter time. And I spat it out and went, yuck, this is dark chocolate. I hate dark chocolate. And they were like, yeah, but Cherry Ripe has always been dark chocolate. Oh, it has. And I said, what do you mean?

Because the cherry part in the middle is so overpowering that I never noticed that it was dark chocolate. But once it's in an Easter egg form, the ratio is way off. They just had little cherry bits in dark chocolate and it was disgusting. No, I'm with you. Block form changes everything. So maybe, jury's out, next week I will also bring a lint bunny block. Don't worry. I've reached out to lint they're providing.

And we'll try it because it might taste different. Maybe thinner chocolate in a block form will actually be yummier. Who knows? Thinner chocolate? Isn't it just the same shit, though? That's my point. We don't know. The only way to know is if we launch, will it block?

I'd like to try it. I thought they already blocked it. They did. Yeah. But we haven't tried it. We need to know. Yeah. So my question to you is, A, what three chocolate bars would you block?

I am choosing Snickers, and I will bring Snickers in block i am choosing snickers and i will bring snickers in block form and bar form and we will compare and to see if it will block does it have to be a chocolate or can we just block any old shit no it's got to be a chocolate bar i mean unless it's like a powder like unless you bring to the table mitchell like a milo if you want to what do sustag, like a Milo, if you want to, what, do sustagion or something? Ben a fibre so you can bottom happy. That's actually a really good idea for the gays, this Mardi Gras. Fibre in chocolate.

What about something like, you know, I don't know if they do this anymore. I haven't seen it in ages. But, you know, the chocolate-coated scotch fingers. Oh, yum. If we just add a bit more chocolate to that, will that block? And crumble a scotch finger in it. Or just mix it all up. I'll bring my Nutribullet.

No, I've got to pre-block. This has got legs, this pitch. I've got to pre-block. I'll have to do it at home in the lab. Because we're going to have to set in the fridge. Oh yeah, you're right. So I'm going to have to do some work, which is dumb. That's how you know I really want this pitch to work. Count me in.

No, I think it needs to be a chocolate bar. That's the whole point. I reckon you could get a bit inventive, couldn't you? Okay, well it could be a chocolate. If you want it to be a chocolate coated scotch finger, I'm not going to yuck your yum. Janet, do you have a chocolate bar to lock in? And we can then ask the question. Say it with me.

Will it lock? I see. I it with me. Will it lock? I see. Yeah. I see. Okay. I'm going to go with my personal favourite. Yep. That I've brought on the show before.

Yeah. And it's the delicious double decker chocolate. Wow. The one that clogs your throat. No, it's delicious. That's going to be hard to block because it's full of marshmallow. Fuck, it's going to ruin my machinery. It could.

That's fine. We'll see if it will full of marshmallow. Fuck, it's going to ruin my machinery. It could. That's fine. We'll see if it will block. Yeah. Mitchell, what do you have? See, I'm not really interested in turning an existing chocolate into block form because it'll taste the same. I kind of want to start from scratch. Oh. Like maybe build something that has not existed in a chocolate block form before.

Yes, that's what we want. Yes. Like, has anyone ever fucking had a gingerbread man chocolate block? Oh, yeah, that'd be around Christmas for sure. I've never seen it. Gingerbread man in chocolate. Yeah, I've been in a block of chocolate. Yes, I've seen it. I've had gingerbread chocolate. I think they had that on the cruise. Yeah.

For the oldies. Or, similar to the fact that they're taking a bunny and putting it in block form and you're like, well, it's just chocolate at that point. Yeah. Tim Tams. Oh. That's a good one. Do they have Tim Tam chocolate?

No, Tim Tam is like the form. You reckon? Yeah. All right. But if you melted it and whisked it a bit, you might have to add a bit of chocolate with it. Yeah. A block of Tim Tam.

Oh, that'd be delightful. Oh. Oh, God. A Woolies mud cake. Oh. That's good. A Woolies mud cake. Oh, that's good. Now, that will get people talking. That has length. In block form instead of cake form.

How would I block it? Yeah. This should change my life. It would. I don't know, but I would kind of like to see the blocking process. Well, yeah, I have to refine it. I've done some demos. Have you?

Yeah. Wow, this truly is the most effort you've ever put into anything Listen, I love chocolate and I love the show The Block Alright, we're locking in a Woolies Mud Cake, that's good Or Oh gosh Either the Woolies Mud Cake, the Tim Tam Or the Scotch Fingers, like I said Because they have those chalk coated

So if you added Scotch Finger with it Should we let the idiots decide? Sure. And by the time... Why don't we all just throw ideas and you just come back with whatever you think was a good idea. Okay, good idea. I'll be bringing three bars. I want to do the Snickers.

I think a Snicker will work in a bar. Yeah. In a block form. But just remember that it's okay if the answer to the question, will it block, is no. I know. If it comes back and it's all fucking minging, that's fine. Okay, well, it's in the fate of the gods now, hands of the gods. I'd love to challenge you with something like a scotch finger.

Okay, well, we've got the double decker, the Snickers, potentially the mud cake, potentially the scotch finger, whatever the idiots decide. Or the Tim Tam. Or the Tim Tam. Or gingerbread. Or gingerbread, yeah, whatever they want. We'll put a poll in the Injury and Idiots Facebook page. Gingerbread with caramilk.

Imagine. Oh, Mitchell. Suck my ass. That'd be divine. Listen, it's what the idiots want. Sure. Yeah. What should we block?

What should we block? Yeah. Apart from your ex. Yeah. Been there, done that. And that did not taste as good. That was very bitter. That did not block.

Wow. Oh, you like the segment? Oh, I'm very curious to see how it goes. Well, it's been greenlit. It's not an annual, will it block? Not yet. It's been greenlit to be performed. That's not where I saw the pitch going. Were you shocked? Yeah. Kinda.

I was waiting for Scotty Cam. No, I'm sure he could get Scott on. He's easy. He goes to the opening of an envelope in Shelly Craft. I just thought it was going to be like a half-baked idea and we'd have to workshop it. But no, you've got it all prepared. Time and effort. What do you mean you've got the utensils ready to go?

I bought a waffle maker. Huh? Mm-hmm. And I reckon if you just put the chocolate bar in it and then close it, it'll block it. But what if it breaks the machine? It won't. So it's not going to be the neatest block in the world.

It'll look like a waffle, which is just a block. And I've tested it. Fuck you. I've tested it and it worked. I feel like the double deck is going to clog the machine. No, it's not. The only issue is once you put the chocolate bar in it and then you mush it, then you've got to turn it off quickly

so it doesn't burn, so it melts, and then you have to wait overnight for it to cool. It's really not a fun process. It takes a long time. Yeah, wow. But that's all right. I think it'll be good. I'm impressed.

So which one out of mine? Oh, you haven't decided yet which ones you're going to try? I haven't decided yet. Okay. But I am also thinking perhaps I will put it in an ice cube tray. Titanic ice cube tray. Will it block Titanic edition? But then you'd have to make it overflow a bit.

That's the point. So then there's a top. Oh, it's going to be tricky to get them out. I know. I was thinking, do I spray it with canola oil? Or what you do is because what I do when I'm making smoothies, right, is I make a big fuck off smoothie that's got like three days worth in a big jug. And then I pour them into those big ice cube trays.

Pop those in the freezer so that I've basically meal prepped a smoothie. Mitchell, I hate- And then the next day, I'm not finished. I'm giving you a hack. I'm trying to help you. Fuck. Sorry, sorry.

The next day, I just get like a bowl of hot water, pop the ice cube tray in it, not so that it submerges, just so the bottom of the smoothie cubes get a bit hot so that they'll slip out and pop them in the Nutribullet and then there you go. Smart. I don't have to make a smoothie every day. That could work. Yeah. Four-piece chocolate moulds for $14.99.

Surely we can put them on the kiddio. Oh, yeah, if you want to put it on the kiddio, that's all right. Look at these. They're perfect moulds. Yeah. Oh, yeah, well, then do that. Fuck the waffle maker. That's a chocolate block, yeah, and then I'll just have to melt chocolate

and then add bits of the bars. Yeah, but you're going to have to make it quick because if the chocolate starts to set, then you can't remelt it. So it's going to have to be a really quick process. Like, fuck, it's melted. Chuck it in. Why can't you remelt it? Have you ever tried remelting already melted chocolate?

No. Impossible. Is it? Yeah. I'm going to put these on the kiddio. This is great. And then, oh, yeah, and they're silicon, so they'll peel off. But then, like, when you empty it, put it on a bit of baking paper and just let it stay there.

Don't touch it. Let it set again. Oh, because it's going to melt a little in the hot water. A little bit. A little bit. Smart. But I don't reckon it'll be melty melty. It'll be, like, soft, right?

Yeah, but then that's what I mean. Just let it, while it's soft, let it go back to cold. Oh, God, I'm so excited. I'm talking like I know what the fuck I'm talking about. I'm just like, that's what I do, basically. This also comes with gold leaf. Oh, so you can make wrappers. Yeah. Oh, God, I'm so excited. I'm talking like I know what the fuck I'm talking about. I'm just like, that's what I do, basically. This also comes with gold leaf. Oh, so you can make wrappers. Yeah.

Oh, foil. I can make little chocolate bars. Oh, that's cool. Isn't that cute? I don't know how a Snickers is going to go, though. I know. Because when you think about it, the ratio of the filling versus the chocolate, like, even if you melt that.

What do you mean? You're going to have to add more chocolate. I know. Same with the double decker. You know what? Maybe maybe i do maybe i don't add that much melted chocolate i just melt the chocolate bars in a saucepan just just like three or four double deckers three or four snickers and then just pour whatever liquid it is into the that won't be good i know yeah you might have to add a bit more chocolate maybe i do one layer of melted chocolate plain liquid milk chocolate yeah then the gooey whatever I melt from the bars.

Yes. Then another layer. So it's like in this. Fuck. But then imagine if it's actually phenomenal. I know. Then we have to pitch it to Nestle. That's part two of Willa's blog.

No, fuck that. You change the name. It's not a Snickers anymore. No. Oh, you're right. You're going to give it your own name. Snocker. And you can start selling it at markets and shit.

Oh, yes. Numia Markets. Yes. On Christmas Day. On Christmas Day. That's the one day of year you can buy a it at markets and shit. Oh, yes. Numia Markets. Yes. On Christmas Day. On Christmas Day. That's the one day of year you can buy a snocker. Yes. Let's do it.

And time in bars. I like that. You know, I had a scotch finger in Scotland and it tasted exactly the same as a scotch finger in Australia because they're Scottish. Right. I see. See, if we're fucking about with layers, that could actually be phenomenal. What do you reckon?

Layer of chocolate, crush up a bunch of scotch fingers, like bash them, and then just sprinkle that in another layer of chocolate at the top. Oh, my God. You're going to have to make sure the moulds that you get on Amazon are quite deep. Yeah, because they look shallow, don't they? They do. They do. Yeah, we want deep ones.

But then the deep ones will take ages to set. That's all right. I've done it overnight. Put it in the freezer. Pop it in the bloody fridge. You'll be right. Well, that will be brought to you next week. Next Wednesday's episode.

Is that? Sure? Yeah. Yeah, sure. Do it. Yeah. Okay. Mardi Gras weekend.

Good call, Mitchell. Nice. Let's go. Actually, by the time this is out, Mardi Gras is this weekend. Oh, wow. Okay. Happy Mardi Gras, everyone. Yeah.

Happy Mardi Gras. Chocolate block. We will see you in a week. Thank you for listening to the show. We love you. Yeah. We'll catch you soon, idiots. See you.

We'll be back on Monday. Love you. Goodbye. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Make sure you hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to A to Debrief, our secret segment on the end mitchell this titanic squeaky toy is so cute

my little godson harrison oh please not that again do you have a bath uh yes oh my god yeah your godson he's obsessed with titanic isn't he? Gay. Yeah, well, we all think, I think, in the best way possible. Hope so. God, I'd kill to have a gay godson. Do you remember that time that he was spitting Titanic facts at me? That was incredible. And he got one of them wrong. No, he didn't.

He was like, Titanic sunk on April 14. I was like, well, no, it didn't. No. Did he really? It hit the iceberg on April 14, but it didn't sink until past midnight on the 15th. To his credit, he was six years old at the time, and his peers were still calling a monkey a giraffe. So I'm impressed with his level.

He's now the smartest child I know. He's moved on to the Orient Express. So the other night I was at his house, he went, Mitch, do you want to come and see the Orient Express? And I walked to him and went, this is the murder on, this is the Orient Express. The famed film, the murder on the, the book, the murder on the Orient Express. He's a genius. Does he just love disaster?

Maybe. No, I think he loves mega structures with disaster. Is he up to 9-11? Oh, I don't think so. But he loves planes, so it's a slippery slope. He's only six clicks away. Yeah. And he'll be at 9-11.

And he'll be there. Apparently he loves to watch the Titanic and the Poseidon, but only from the sinking. He skips all the plot. I mean, the other shit is just wasting time, isn't it? So, like, I get it. Oh, Mitchell, this is such a good gift. Now I feel like mine are shit.

Would you know yours is brilliant? That's historical. Yeah. Are you going to re-gift that to your godson that loves the Titanic? No, I'm going to keep it. Okay. But when he comes over, he'll love it. Does he often bathe at your house?

No, no, he doesn't. No, but he might see it. I'll put it on my shelf. That's a great collector's item. In my whistle. Piece of... Jenna. Yeah, please stop with that. Jenna, I've Googled... Can I do one more? Just one more. But like, ready? Give it your all, like diaphragm.

Oh my god. Wait, wait. She blew too hard. One more. It's so stressful to watch you do it. It is. I feel like she's going to collapse. I'm done now. All right.

So I've Googled genuine piece of the Berlin Wall. Some come with documentation and papers. $33. Yeah. Well, I didn't pay for it, so. Mine's better. I don't want to plant any seeds of doubt, Jenna, but you've got to ask, that rock could have come from anywhere.

Are we sure that's where we got it? Yeah. Do you have photos? It looks an awful lot like the gravel where I grew up. Oh, well, I didn't drive to Bogan Gate. Yeah, let me find it for you. Did you film yourself picking it up? No, Jenna, because then that's filming myself committing a crime.

I'm not an idiot. This is not my first theft. Cherry, I've just been having a quick look at DIY chocolate block tips. Yeah. Put the melted chocolate in one of those piping bags. That'll make it easier with the layering. Oh, genius. Melt the chocolate first, then in a piping bag.

Fuck you're good. This is the wall I stole it off from the platform on the bottom. Match it up, Jenna. Match it up. I'm not a liar. And match it up, Jenna. Match it up. I'm not a liar. Okay, so from that bottom. Correct. It is.

It genuinely is. Yeah, I think you're right. I'm not making it up. I wouldn't say it on record because then they could get me. True. And then I'm lying about it. I believe you. Thank you.

Look, Mitchell, it's from that corner on the Berlin Wall. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I believe you. It's all right. Or is it? Nah. We'll never know. We'll never know.

It's from the Shire. I had to travel. Yeah, it is from Kuala. I had to drive around, fly around Europe with that in my backpack. Thank God customs didn't pull me up on it. Surely it's not that heavy. No, it's not. Yeah, I was going to say.

It's quite lightweight. Anyway. Now there's all rock remnants on the desk. Oh, would you like these? Pop it in that. Okay. But then where will you put your dolphin? The dolphin will go in my backpack.

No, put it in there. All right, thank you. I don't want it to break. Mitchell, I got both aquatic stuff. I got a dolphin. I got a boat. They kind of go hand in hand. The scale's a bit off, but yeah.

It is a bit off. They could be best friends. Look at them. I wonder if they could. The dolphin, I got a boat. They kind of go hand in hand. Yeah. The scale's a bit off, but yeah. It is a bit off. They could be best friends. Look at them. I wonder if... Oh, they could. The dolphin would have seen this thing. Seek my past. I don't know if dolphins could survive water that cold. I'm just pulling shit out my ass. I don't know what you're talking about. In the movie, remember Jack and Ross?

Ross? They weren't quite in the depths of the ocean at that point. When they saw the dolphins. Yeah. I don't know. I could be wrong. You know, like, Rose was older than Jack, right? No. She was 17. Yeah. How old was he?

I don't know. Did they specify? I feel like he was younger. No, like, the actor Leonardo was younger than Kate Winslet. Oh, really? Their characters. Maybe that's what I'm thinking. God, isn't that weird that it actually happened?

I know. It's real. That's wild. Yeah. It says Rose DeWitt Bukata was 17 in the movie. Jack Dawson's age is never revealed. Ah. But DiCaprio was 22 at the time when it was filmed.

Wow. But she would have been older than fucking 17 when they filmed it. Of course. So that doesn't really indicate much. She was probably closer to like 27. Oh, not old. Imagine being that old. I remember when I found out that she was meant to be 17 in the movie.

I was like, oh, for fuck, no way. No way. All of a sudden the whole story became way less romantic. I'm like, oh, my God, you're a teenager and you met him on a cruise. Grow up. Like, this is not true love. I know. Jenna, sounds strikingly similar to your recent trip.

Did you perish? Did anyone perish in the oceans of Numia with you? Somebody asked the medical centre if there were any deaths and there wasn't that crazy. You've said that, yeah. Previous one, I think there was. There was, yeah. Oh, we're good gifts, guys.

I'm going to take Finn off and take him home. He's gorgeous. My dad will love it. Yeah. Your dad will love it. Yeah, dad loves bottle openers because he's in the liquor industry. Oh, I love that. I found out the hardest way when I had all these bottle openers stuck to my fridge.

I've got two and now three that I don't actually require them. I just open bottles of wine or cans of fucking Voddy Soda, really. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I don't actually have any need for one. God, I went through the bottle shop the other day. But the day I need it, oh, I'm so prepared. Your dolphin's there. What's your dolphin's name?

Did you name yours? Yeah, Amelia. Amelia, yeah. Amelia, yeah. Oh, God, sorry. I just caught Jenna's giant drink bottle again. I thought, why is there a can of kerosene in here? It just looks so unreasonable.

It looks like what you screw into the bottom of a Weber Q to feed your family. It does actually, a gas bottle. It does look like an L-gas bottle from a 7-Eleven out the front. You're in that case. Why? It's good. Nah, it's good. Oh, she's drinking.

God. Are we all excited for Mardi Gras? Yes, actually. I'm very excited. I, at the time of record, have not rehearsed the dance as much as I should have, but we've got a couple more rehearsals, so I'm good. Yeah, we do. I'm excited too.

I had tickets to the Bondi Beach party because Slater is like my favourite artist. I love Slater. I've never even heard of Slater. Would I know any of their songs? No, I don't think you would. I can play one because I have had them on the show. If she wore a name tag, I'd fucking remember her forever. But I'm not good at placing artists to songs anymore.

Yeah. You play a song and I go, oh no, I have heard of them. Okay, no, Slater's in this song with Peaking Dark. Ready? Honest. Do you know this? Wait. No.

Never heard that one. No? This is very Peaking Dark coded, though. You can tell it's not an AFK. Yeah. Ready? Oh, my God. This song was designed for people capped off their teeth.

100%. Slater's music is so good. I love Slater's music. It's very good. Okay, cool. Anyway, I had tickets to the Bondi Beach party and it's the same night. It was the same night as Taylor Swift, so I couldn't go. I'm surprised you chose Taylor over Slater, someone you actually like.

Well, Taylor Swift, I took my mum. It was a beautiful thing. Yeah. You know, it is what it is. Yeah. Anyway. Mardi Gras will be good. The float will be so much fun.

I'm excited. I'm excited. I feel bad because I sold it to you as a float, but we're not actually on any sort of mechanism. I know. We're just walking. I know. That's all right. That's why I've started saying in the parade.

Do we get props? There are props. You're going to have to shoddy one. Aislinn's already shoddyed the bubble gun, we're walking. That's all right. That's why I started saying in the parade. Do we get props? There are props. You're going to have to shoddy one. Aislinn's already shoddy the bubble gun. You're kidding. Oh, is there multiple? What else is there? I don't know, actually.

Jenny, do you want to go on my shoulders? Yeah. I'm on stilts. So you'll be very high. Let's do it. There's parts of the parade where we do the dance and parts where we don't. So I'm hoping that I'm able to walk with you two so that any of our idiots that are watching the parade there in real life on Oxford Street, we can be like, hi, yes, it's us. Yeah.

But then I'm going to have to ditch you and jump into formation for the dance. That's all right. We don't mind. Jenna and I can keep each other company. So when you watch it on TV, idiots, it's the Fusion Pride Northern Beaches float. Yeah. I'll be in the dance troupe. You guys will be likely up the back just fucking about.

I'll be dressed as the Northern Beaches they're just a wife singlet censored myself because they've changed the name what? the singlet what's like

the cloak will name for a singlet you don't call it that anymore don't you? no you just call it oh were you going to say something okay

I didn't mean to but I censored myself right right right yeah I have heard that thrown around a couple of times recently. I'm like, Jesus Christ. I love how no one ever questioned why they called it a one.

Yeah. That's fucked. They call it something else now. It's so off that that was ever called that. Shocking. Yeah. Awful. But I'm into them now.

I really like the singlets. That particular cut? No, no. Yeah. I never used to wear bonds, chesty bonds, because I never felt confident, but now I like them. Yeah, right. With like an open shirt.

Yeah. All right. Well, shall we go like them. Yeah, right. With like an open shirt. Yeah. All right, well, shall we go? Sure. Yeah, why not? I was going to do one more brainstorm, but it can wait. Oh, what for? Oh, I just met with a new merch supplier, and we're going to do another merch run this year, so I'm just going to see what you think we should do.

That's a big conversation. That's a big. I reckon we let the idiots as well let us know what they want out of our merch, because we've done mugs, we've done pop sockets, we've done shirts, we've done hoodies. I reckon another jumper could be cute. Also, I'm not going to lie, I actually asked this supplier if rash vests are doable. Oh, my God. And they said, yeah, of course, but do you think people would buy them?

Yes, absolutely. And so what I need to know, because obviously it's a running joke that Jenna keeps suggesting we do rash shirts. And it's been almost five years that she's been begging for these. Sun safety. And so we've had a few people say, oh my God, you should do them. I totally buy them. I need to know if you actually would, because there's a minimum order for that.

And I'm like, I don't want to put them on sale and then no one buys them because it's just an inside joke. No, no. We need to be able to sell them. Protect your skin. You need to actually fucking be willing to buy them. Yes. I'd love an Ijum sun visor.

What? Yeah. I love sun visors. What's that again? It's a hat without the top. Oh, yeah, okay. So your hair can poke through. You'd like it.

You could do a high bun pony. I could actually. Anyway, we can... For all that tennis I play. Yeah, of course. In the bocce. Let's see what the listeners want. DM us, idiots.

Yeah, all right. We'll leave it at that. Or post it in the Injured Idiots page and we can have a further discussion soon. Good call. All right, guys. Thanks for listening. We love you. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today.

That's all. Just 2%. So we do. So we fucking do. Yeah, amen. Well said. Have a great week. Look after yourself.

We'll see you very soon, guys. Catch you soon. Happy Mardi Gras. Happy Mardi Gras. Bye, bub. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches.

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