Is It Just Me? - #206: Will It CREAM?

Episode Date: May 7, 2024

In this episode: “You look healthy” (05:47) Finding the mum at a party (09:41) Talkback Tingz - Horny elderly folk + Dot Wiggins returns! (15:33) Will It CREAM? (26:02) Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (39:57)   Join our Facebook group 'Endurant Idiots' facebook.com/groups/477062186470271 Hit us up: @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Hello you! Hello you! Go! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Mitchell fucking Cherry uttered a sentence to me that I never thought I'd hear him say. He goes, so what's the vision?

I just mean what's the vision? It's a creative term. I didn't know you put such importance on vision. Fucking Fred Holley's over here all of a sudden. What's the go with that? Now here's Mitch Curie and Mitchell Coombs. Hello you. Hello you. Oh my god, it feels like Christmas. I'm so excited for the episode today. Yeah, I bet you are. This is exactly how I imagine you felt when we did Will It Blend.

Yeah, I suppose, but I just feel like how I imagine you felt when we did Will It Blend. Yeah, I suppose. But I just feel like you've got a menacing look in your eye because we're doing Will It Cream today. Yes, baby. Thierry's made DIY ice creams for Jenna and I, who is here, of course, our third wheel. Hi, I'm really scared. Don't be scared.

He hasn't told us what the ice creams are going to be and I just feel like you're up to something and it's revenge for the gross smoothies I made you. I'll be honest. The two creams that I've made you are filled with items that you have all had in your life, and I know you've enjoyed. Right. Yeah.

So it's okay. But it's whether or not they sort of work as a cream-based dessert. It will be up to you to judge. I suppose so. Maybe fine. Don't worry. A bit of fun. I'm having a laugh.

But don't go out getting revenge on me for the, I think it's the meat pie and the Big M that you're most upset about that I gave you in a smoothie. It was foul. Just remember that was your idea. It was so disgusting. That was your idea. It was my idea. It was a will it cream.

I mean, listen, we've had some ridiculous ideas. That was my idea. I think you're fine. Oh, was it? I apologise. Sorry. I just had an outburst mid-idjim. You were talking about how you got the ninja cream meat and I just completely interrupted

you and went, will it cream? Oh, I think you did. Well, the Ninja Creamy's been amazing. I've been making – the Ninja Creamy's like a fad in the health scene because you can make healthy, yummy ice cream. Is ours going to be healthy, yummy ice cream? Absolutely not. Jenna's – no, yours is somehow full of carbs, Jenna.

I don't even know how that's possible of an ice cream. What is it? Are the Ninja Creamy yours? Absolutely not, no. Okay. I'm excited, and I think it's a new ground for the podcast. We just have to be really careful when we do this segment, can I just say, because I don't know if you saw in our Facebook group, Enduring Idiots, we got a post complaining

about us eating on the podcast into the mic. People don't like the sound of it. I did see that. Which is not new feedback. We've gotten that feedback before. But Brett said, I've been holding this in for weeks. Maybe an unpopular opinion, but can we please have a few weeks off

from the chewing, slurping or eating in the microphone? I think it's a bit, I get it. Yeah, but he only wants a few weeks off. Yeah, we'll come back to it in a few weeks time. I feel like once upon a time I used to be like, oh guys, people don't like it. Don't chew into the microphone. But fuck, we've dropped the ball in the last few weeks, haven't we?

Even months, we've been doing fucking Tasmanian gingerbread, smoothies, chocolate, Anzac cookies, sandwiches, muffins, Donahay cookies. I mean, I kind of feel like, I don't want to trigger anyone. I didn't realize it was such a big deal for people. I just thought people were being a bit precious, but apparently people actually are severely bothered by it. They get a reaction from it, and so they skip the episode. Well, you know what I was told?

Apparently in some videos they go, before it happens, trigger warning, skip to 43.12 if you don't want to hear the chewing. So, I mean, we could put those warnings in if people want to skip. Yeah, we might have to. But I reckon today we just... Chew off Mike? Yeah. We'll be having our ice creams creams but we won't have the spoon on Mike. Well, ice cream? Yeah.

You scream. We all scream. Misophonia, apparently. Oh, is that what it's called? I bet I got that wrong. That's what someone in the comments said. Misophonia? It's like a reaction to sounds such as dripping water, chewing, snapping gum, repetitive noises, pencil tapping, whatever.

I think she taught me society and culture. Who? Miss Phonia. Miss Phonia, can I go to the toilet? I've got a friend that has a dog named Peach, and the surname is Zen Cream. Really? Yeah, it's an ethnic name. Peach.

Zen Cream. Oh, Peach is Zen Cream. Yeah, isn't that funny? But it's Zen Cream. I thought it was some sort of play on a Zen pick at first. Peach is in a Zen pick? Yeah. Dream hybrid, that's all you can eat. It sounded like some sort of play on a zen pic at first. Me too. Peaches and a zen pic? Yeah. Dream hybrid.

That's all you can eat. It sounded like you were making fun of me. Hilarious. Did you see Barbara Streisand comment on Melissa McCarthy's Instagram asking if she was on a zen pic? I know. Wasn't that the most mum energy shit ever? It's so funny.

You tell the story. Okay. So Melissa McCarthy posted a photo. She was with another actor or another celeb. And they were at an event. And she looked hot. She has lost some weight. She looks great.

And she posted on Instagram, nothing to do with anything other than how good she looked. And then Barbra Streisand in the comments said, sent in my regards, talking about the other actor, are you on a Zen pic? So blunt. And the energy from that, it sounds like she thought that was a private message.

Yeah, well, she's come out now and since said, I thought it was private. I apologize. It's so funny. I know, and the fact that it's Barbra Streisand, but also like everyone's on it. I feel like the discourse has changed. You can talk about it now. Like that proves that everyone is on it.

I'm just like, you do you, babe. It doesn't sound enjoyable to me. Side effects. And you have to inject yourself. Yeah. Yeah. It's an injection. Will, if it's your first time listening, will it inject me?

Will it inject? Come inside for the show. Will it jab? Will it inject? Coming soon for the show. Will it jab? Will it jab? Every show we start with an Is It Just Me, something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Mitch don't know mine. I don't know Mitch's.

Should I go first? Yeah, mine is something I deeply, deeply appreciate. And I feel like a lot of our listeners can fall into this category of people that I appreciate. Okay. I'm quite looking forward to that. It's been a while since we've appreciated shit, isn't it? We've been really cynical.

Especially me. I'm normally very optimistic, but I've been grumpy the last couple of months. Yeah. Not in life. Not in life. No, but on this show. Well, it'll be a welcome change. Can't wait.

But should I go first? Yeah, yeah, let's go. Yeah, you can jump in. Go for it. Is it just me or? Should we normalize being able to say, you look healthy? Oh. Because you know how some people read that as an insult?

You look healthy. Do they read that as an insult? Yeah. Well, if the situation is, for instance, that someone has gained weight, someone might say to them, oh, you're looking healthy. Because that's like the only nice word they can think of. And people read it as like a backhanded compliment. Oh, I hate being told to look healthy.

I think it's a beautiful thing to say. Has this happened to you? Has someone said it to you? No, and that's the problem. You do look healthy. I would love to be told to look healthy sometimes. No, but also when people say, oh, you look well. Oh, all the time.

What's wrong with you look well? Well, it's kind of similar. I think I would never say to someone, the thing that say, oh, you look well. Oh, all the time. What's wrong with you look well? Well, it's kind of similar. I think I would never say to someone, the thing that I hate more than you look healthy, I think that's fine to say, is, oh, you look a bit tired. I'm like, shut up. Chances are I am, dog. Don't bring it up. Aren't we all?

Sorry, can we all agree that we're all tired? Yeah. Well, that's why I would love to be told you look healthy, because some bloody days I look in that godforsaken mirror in my fucking home and I go, holy shit, he needs a vegetable or something. Something's not right there. Yeah. So if I go out and someone tells me you look healthy, I'd be like, thank you. Yeah.

Thank you. Because God, you should have seen me the other day. Not at all. Not healthy. Yeah. It depends on the day. Some days I just look wretched, but that's probably because I'm fucking tired. Yes. So I don't want to be told I'm tired. Maybe you can be healthy on the inside, not the day. Some days I just look wretched, but that's probably because I'm fucking tired. Yes.

So I don't want to be told I'm tired. Yeah, but you can be healthy on the inside and not the outside and then vice versa. That's true. I feel like getting told you're healthy is very rare. I can't remember the last time, other than my doctor, who's like, oh, you're very healthy. But you know how people say, oh, you look healthy. Some people would think, they basically just called me obese. Oh, do you think that's what they mean by that?

Yeah. Oh, he's, well, yeah. That's like a common thing. It's something my dad would say, like, oh, he's healthy. Yeah. He's just big boned. Yeah, yeah, of course, which I don't think exists, is it? No, it's not.

No. Well, Mitchell, Jenna, let's say it together. You look healthy. Oh, thank you. Do you have a fake tan on? A little bit, yeah. You can tell. Actually, is it still looking good? Because it's been a while, so it's probably getting all patchy. No, thank you. Do you have a fake tan on? A little bit, yeah. You can tell. Actually, is it still looking good?

Because it's been a while, so it's probably getting all patchy and wet. No, it's nice. Especially on your face. And your hair looks straight and clean. Thank you. And your jewellery. You look healthy. You do actually look healthy.

You genuinely do. Do you know what's quite upsetting? What's wrong? You remember how long my nails were and I was gloating the other day? Yeah. Look how short I've had to cut them. Oh my God, same. I've bitten my nails back.

Oh, you've relapsed. I've relapsed. It's really bad. Like the worst I've been. And I was on a three-month streak. What happened? I just was anxious one day driving, didn't even notice and got to work and had no nails. Just autopilot?

Yep. Didn't even realise. Fuck. Yep. Would you ever put that gross tasting shit on the nails so that when you lick them it goes... I've done it, but then I ended up enjoying it. Yeah, I remember that.

That's right. It grows on you. It was like sarsaparilla. I was like, that's a tasty little bitter like a Negroni. I was trying to superglue something the other day, right? Yeah. And then I accidentally spilled the superglue on my nails. And so when I used the nail polish remover to take that off,

what was left behind was just so brittle and disgusting. So I had to cut them short. Now I'm devastated. I feel naked. At least you can finger yourself now. Well, there's always light at the end of the tunnel. God. I really thought that you being in a new relationship would dissipate the horniness from you.

I'm not horny for you fingering yourself. In fact, I'd rather not. I know, but just sometimes you can think before you speak. Last week. At least you can finger yourself now. Yeah. What kind of thing to say is that? Well, Jenna last week was begging for our

cum and no one scolded her. No, that's incorrect. She certainly wasn't begging for your cum. No, that's for sure. Remind me. Anyway. Well, congrats on your nails. What was the year, Jim? Should we normalise being able to say you look healthy and have it not be interpreted

as an insult? Congrats on your nails. Anyway, are you going to give me your Is It Just Me? Yeah, I'm ready to go. Is it just me or? Is finding the mum at the party the best feeling ever? An actual mum? Yeah, the mum.

Whether you beat a birthday of a friend's, finding their mother is the best feeling ever. Yeah, I get that. I get that. I get that. Yeah. I love sitting down, pulling up a rosé with Karen, Liesl, Denise. So this is Denise. Michelle. And just gossiping the house down.

How stressed are you about this party, babe? You don't want it to be happening? Who dressed you? What are you wearing? This is a lovely dress. You've got your hair done. I can tell. The house is gorgeous. How long have you lived here? Oh, God. What do you do for you wearing this is a lovely dress you've got your hair done i can tell the house is gorgeous how long have you lived here oh god what do you do for work two days a week because the husband's traveling interstate i love the drama

of a mother and what's going on in her life when you're at a party that's not about her because she's got so much to tell always i mean obviously jenna relates but i i think just you because i don't go to parties where parents are invited. Oh, my God. No, but you have been to parties. The only party I've been to where their parents were there was fucking yours. It was your housewarming and it was all people our age and then just your mum making fucking party pie. It was adorable.

I really liked hanging with your parents. Then they gave speeches. It was a real fun night. And wasn't that the housewarming? Yeah, it was the housewarming. That did not require speeches. Sorry. No, it didn't.

And I gave a lovely speech about how much I loved the partner. Then we split up three days later. It was a fun time, wasn't it? Paid for the whole thing. Of course it did. No matter how hard we tried, the home wouldn't warm. No, it wouldn't. That was our icy home.

Icy cold. Icy barren, barren home that felt very unhomely to me. Unless I'm at a party where there's obviously going to be mumsy aged people there like, you know, my auntie Trish and whatever my mum's 60th, there's obviously going to be mums there and I do gravitate towards them. But typically in my adult life I don't go to any parties where there's parents there. Well, it doesn't

really happen as much anymore, you're right, but I can just remember back in high school. I bet it does for you. It does kind of, yeah. I will find the mother. Like, I am like a truffle pig at a birthday party. I know there's a mum somewhere. Let me tell you. Here's a little tip if you're like me. Go to the kitchen.

They're always in the kitchen. They're stressed. Sexist. No, no, no, but they are. I'm sorry, but they are. I'm not the one that makes the rules. I wish they were in the CEO's room. They're in the kitchen and they're there and they are cooking oven-baked dishes.

It's always like a sausage roll or a party pie. And they're always stressed. And I go, Mrs. Coombs, can I help? Oh, Mitchell, no. Grandma's here, don't worry. Then grandma's out embalmed, you know, sitting in a wheelchair, helping with the kitchen, chopping carrots. Look, I love the women of a party, the women that are involved

in putting on a party. Tell me your story. I need to know. Write a book. I'll buy it. I'll sign it. Okay. You'll sign it. Okay. You'll sign it.

That's a bit rude, isn't it? You wrote this book, Mitch Cherry. Why would you be signing it? I didn't say it right. But the point was there. If you're a mum at a party, you know what? Here's what I'm going to say. If you're a mum and you throw a party for your kid and a little boy comes up to you,

just whisper in his ear, you'll be gay one day. What? Because it's true. I thought you were talking about now. Were you talking about as a child? Both. I would always find the mums at parties. I would too.

Even the mums in my friendships. You shouldn't have to look that hard. There's usually someone supervising. No, no, no, no, no. But even mums of the kids that I was friends with, I had the best relationships with. I feel like I did too. In many cases, some of my former friends,

I can say that with confidence that they're former friends, I probably liked their mothers more. Yeah, did too. In many cases, some of my former friends, I can say that with confidence that they're former friends, I probably liked their mothers more. Yeah, me too. I'm saying 100%. Jen Kiriakos, I'm still in love with. Jen Kiriakos is an icon, except for that one time that I vomited in Nico Kiriakos' spare bed. Woke her up at three in the morning and said, Mrs. Kiriakos, I've just vomited. And she said, go back to bed. And I was so upset. You made your vomity bed now sleep in it. And I did. Well, that's an odd response to just make you sleep in it.

No, she didn't say sleep in it. She was like, just go back to bed. We'll clean it in the morning. We'll call your mum in the morning. She didn't want to borrow it. But she didn't clean it. So wouldn't you have gone back to the chunder bed? I don't remember what happened in that situation.

God, that's abuse. No, it's not. Jen Kyriakos was a queen. Taught me how to make Vegemite toast. We need to get to the bottom of this. How much time do you need to dig through your memory and recall what happened? Did she make you sleep in the fucking vomit?

I might have a number. Oh, God. Jen Kiriakos. How long since you spoke to her? 15, 20 years. Okay. It's an old number, shit. Well, I was going to at the record show. Have you went out of credit? Every phone call you've made recently

has just gone straight to voicemail. What's going on? Who did I call last week that happened to? Jamie Drury. Oh, that's because clearly he's changed his number. He's a celebrity. And Jen Kiriakos, last time she had that phone, we were all on Nokia, so I don't, and it's a green, it was green, so she's clearly upgraded to an iPhone.

It could be someone's new number now. It's not hers anymore. Maybe. I don't know. I love you, Jane Kiriakos. Okay. Narelle Jones. Love Narelle Jones.

Ann Turner. Love. It's starting to skew a bit in memoriam, just naming them and listing them like so. Not a lot. Just giving them a little thank you, a little nod. Okay. Cool. If I was the chairman of a company, that, a little nod. Okay. Cool. If I was the chairman of a company, that I'll be saying, yeah.

All right. And they'll all be making more than me. Anyway, that's just me. Clearly it's just me. I feel like people can relate to that one. Mums will be able to relate to that. Mums will be able to relate to gravitating to mums, you reckon? No.

But someone will find it relatable. Does it mean you're going to start gravitating towards Jenna more once our little one comes into the world? Yeah. I don't know why I'd start now. Well, because she's a mother. Yeah. That's what I was getting at.

Oh, because she's a mother. How far along are you? Once our little one comes into the world. Oh, Sebastian. No. Jaquavius. Jaquavius. Yeah.

Don't make fun of my son, mate. Yeah. No. It's not funny. You can come for me in any other area of my life, but don't bring the kids into it. Don't mop my kids. You've got one. Excuse me, Isabella.

Yeah, Connie. That thing fucking shits in the room whenever I walk in. I've got no respect for that beast. Don't talk about my stepdaughter like that. Is it just me? You can follow the show online. Just search couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead.

Now, before we get into this next segment, let me ask a question, Cheery. Yeah. You know how we decided that we weren't keen on doing prank calls on the podcast anymore? Yeah, well, there's kind of like a groundswell of people being like, prank calls are over, cancel the prank call. Yeah, I don't know if we had that many people complaining about it. It was more us just in our guns feeling that they'd had their time

and that we're adults, we shouldn't be behaving like this anymore. Yeah, but also culturally they kind of, people get off them. Like on TikTok, everyone was like, the prank call's over. So my question is, because we have had a few people in the Facebook group asking for your old lady alter ego, Dot Wiggins. Yes.

People have been asking for her to make a comeback. My question is. Yes. Does it count as a prank call if Dot Wiggins were to call a business with a very sincere and genuine inquiry, but you just happen to be putting a voice on? Is that a prank call? If we're making fun of someone, then no. We don't want to punch down. I don't feel you would be punching down in this situation.

If anyone's the fuckwit, it's you pretending to be an old woman. Correct. But the other person on the phone is none the wiser. That's true. So I'm not going to force you to do anything, but I'm just raising that as a potential today. I mean, I guess I could. Well, what's your scenario?

Have you been inspired by another show? Well, it'll all make sense. Let's get into Talkback Tings. Talkback Tings, our segment, of course, is where we bring you the cook shit we hear on Talkback Radio. John Law is probably the most featured in this segment ever. He's a crusty old radio announcer that has been broadcasting since the dawn of time.

And he continues to broadcast. His broadcast, can I just say, I was listening back for the meteorite when it hit with the dinosaurs. Outstanding. Really good radio. Really good. And the gold from his show comes from the very cooked callers that call through to the program.

Yes. A lot of them are equally old and senile. Yes. And I guess, I don't want to give too much away, but the call I'm about to play you, let's just say, the oldies are still horned up. Oh, good to hear. Glad.

I feel that even my libido has been affected from early 20s to late 20s, but apparently the oldies are still horned up. Oh, okay. Yeah, let's go. Okay, so what I'm going to do, I'm going to play the audio and then just sing out if you need me to pause anytime you need. Ready? Cue the horny 80-year-olds.

Russell, are you there? Yes, I am, John, yes. Okay, Russell, what do you want to talk about? I'd like to speak on women's health because their health system, in my humbled opinion, is a wonderful system and they do as much

as they can for us. But now I'm a widow. I lost my wife many years ago and for relief and so forth, I go to brothels. But now I'm a widow. I lost my wife many years ago. And for relief and so forth, I go to brothels. But now I was talking to a lady the other day. She'd been on her own for six years. And she said, I asked her straight out, like, what does a single woman do?

Where does the lady go? What does she do? Who helps her? And the answer really is absolutely nobody. And to me, this is not fair. We're all human beings. We've all got rights. Stop down for a second. Hold on. Good for him so far. What a pioneer. Women should be able to get off too. I'm with him so far. Women should get their own horse for hire. Totally.

I think he should just stop now. Okay. I mean, I've got a solution for him, and I think he's not really across the new wave, the Abbey Chatfields of the world. They actually touch on that. Okay, good. Oh, they do. Oh, great. Okay, we'll continue.

Sorry to interrupt. But John's still a bit flabbergasted at this point. Shocked. With you. How old are you, Russell? I'm 82. And still sexually active, obviously. So you go to brothels?

Yes I do yes that's correct I see and what do you have to pay at a brothel? $300 an hour I see so you have one particular brothel to which you go? I know it depends where I am If I'm in Brisbane or I go in there I travel around a bit you know quite a lot I see

I go wherever I am I travel around a bit, you know, quite a lot. I see. I go wherever I am, whenever the requirement, you know. Okay, and how often might that requirement come along at the age of 82, Russell? Much more often than you'd realise. I'm very healthy and I'm very active, to be truthful. Okay, well, that's very interesting. So it must be quite an expensive life you have. Yes, yes, it is. Yes.

I don't pay all the time. Like now and again, you meet a lady like I did the other night, and she'd been on her own for over six years. Wow, I bet that would have been a big night. It was a wonderful night for both. Yes, yes. Wow, for both. Yes, yes, yes.

I'll bet it was. Six years. The thing that worries me is I rang just for curiosity after speaking to her. I rang eight brothels to see if they do help ladies. Pause. I see where we're going with this. You do, don't you? Uh-huh.

So we're trying to find out. Apparently, it's not common for brothels to have older men for older ladies. Yeah. I think Dot needs an escort all of a sudden. Wow. Because I'm really curious. I am too. Well, I'm curious too.

I mean, I guess, like, you know, women can go get their toys, right? And people who need those toys can get them. Actually, they do touch on that. Oh, do they? Yeah. Do you want to hear that part? Yeah, sure. And then we'll call the whole house.

Play. You've got me tossed here, Russell. I'm finding it difficult to follow this. Aren't there alternatives? Well, I don't know whether I should use the word dildo, but the trouble is, where would the average lady buy a dildo? They're not advertised, really, are they? I don't know.

I've never looked under D for dildo in the Yellow Pages. The Yellow Pages. Well, I've never looked, to be truthful. I don't know, but isn't there such a thing as a vibrator? I hear a lot about those. Yes, yes, but they're still not easy to buy for people that don't know the way around. Yeah, well, look, really, I don't know, and there's nothing I can recommend, you know, except the real thing.

That's my recommendation. If you can get it, I don't know what the alternative might be, and that is up to the individual involved. But, Russell, no doubt about you, 82 and still at it. On my word, and loving it. Wow. Have a good day, and thank you for the call, Russell. I understand. On the one hand, I'm

good for you, mate, but then I'm also like, I just don't want to picture it. It gives me the ick a little bit. I think good for them. I do get his point. In my mind, brothels are just places for men. Historically, they are. But I wonder if there is a little bit. I think good for them. I do get his point. I mean, yeah, but in my mind, brothels are just places for men. Historically, they are. But I wonder if there is a female option. This is what I'm getting at. Yeah. I think that

Dot Wiggins, as a woman, because it'd be creepy if you asked, as Mitchell Cherry, how do I hire a fucking hooker for an old lady? Totally. If it comes from an old lady and it's a sincere inquiry. So my alter ego. Yeah. Okay. I think Dot Wiggins can make that call and it doesn't count as a prank. No. If it comes from an old lady and it's a sincere inquiry. So my alter ego. Yes. Okay.

I think Dot Wiggins can make that call and it doesn't count as a prank. No. Do you know where we're calling? Do you have a brothel in mind? Oh, my goodness. Yeah, I just gave you the number. Yeah. Let's call them.

We have to get Dot in, though, of course. Oh, yeah. Dot! Hello? Dot! Over to the microphone. Hello. Hello.

Hi, darling. Long time no see, Dot. I've missed you. You too. I'm here. I am going to have a grandchild. Here, look. Hello. Hi, darling. Long time no see, Dot. I've missed you. You too. I'm here. I am going to have a grandchild. Oh, yes. Nana Dot.

You've got to tie her down. Made it happen. Whose parent is she? Mine or yours, Jenna? No. I don't know. Who are you? Listen, I'm feeling a little toe-y.

I feel this microphone could do the job quite well. Look at this. This is a little small. Now, Dot, if you need to make a phone call, that won't be rude. You can make a call in front of us. It's so fast. Hold on. Yes.

It's my Nokia. Oh, we're calling. Is that me? Sure. They're busy, aren't they? What's going on? So you're asking how much? How much? And how old?

There's a service. Good afternoon, can I help you? Hello, I'm recording a podcast right now and I have a genuine inquiry in regards to your services offered. Right. I'm just wondering if you would service women or is it a male-only establishment? We do both, women, men, couples. Yeah.

Isn't that interesting? I feel historically you only hear service officers towards men. But I didn't have no idea there was women's services offered. Well, look, it is predominantly men, but sometimes you'll have a woman come on her own, but more than likely it'd be a couple. Interesting. Now, is there an age bracket or limit for patrons?

As long as they're over 18. Got it. Do you have an oldest male escort available? Do you know their age? A male escort? Yes, for a female. No, no, no. We don't have male escorts.

If the females come in, it's because they want to see a female. Ah, oh my goodness. So what is the oldest female escort that you have for availability? A 50. Wow. You've answered all my questions. This is very insightful. I feel not discussed enough. Okay.

Alright. I appreciate it. Thank you so much. No problem. Thank you. You have a great day. Goodbye. You too. Bye-bye. Shit. Russell was right. Russell was right. Russell was right. Russell was right. You can't get hookers for old ladies.

That's ridiculous. Bye, Dot. I think Dot would be good with Russell. I think Dot would be great with Russell. Isn't that interesting? You know what? Genuinely, I'm glad he shed some light into that. That's very interesting.

We should make this our cause for some reason. Get old ladies a root. Yeah, I agree. Put on a t-shirt. Put on a new tote bag. Well, because Jenna's been there, of course. Yeah, yeah, of course. The only one in the room that's been through menopause multiple times.

You can be the face of the cause. Yes, I'd love to. I would love to. A poster girl. Yes, yes. Yeah, you do. Is it just me? Make sure you leave a review on your podcast app.

If you don't, you're a little bitch. All right, it is officially time, the moment that every idiot has been waiting for since I announced that I'm in fact a ninja and I am the proud owner of a Ninja Creamy, which is a device that allows you to put wet ingredients or really any ingredient into a tub, blitz it up and turn it into a delicious creamy dessert.

So that being said, it's time for the latest edition of... Wheel it, wheel it, wheel it, wheel it, latest edition of... Oh, God. How many more Willits can we do? I don't know. I feel like maybe we take a break from the Willits. We've done Willit Block, DIY chocolate blocks, Willit Blend, which was turning meals into smoothies. And so now what is it today again?

Willit Creamy. Willit Cream. Willit Cream. You're right. Willit Creamy. Willit Creamy is're right. Will it creamy? Will it creamy is trademarked. I've never seen a ninja creamy in action. No. I kind of thought this was going to be like one of those fucking morning

show advertorials where you brought it in and I'm like I'm sold. I will call now for the special TV only offer. Oh well wait till you see what I've created for you. Yeah you've made them behind my back. I know you guys are worried that I've fucked with you after you've fucked with me, but I don't believe in tit for tat.

Yes, you do. No, I don't. I don't believe in tit for tat. I'm not spiteful at all. I have no temper. So you've made us ice creams and we don't know what they are? I've made you ice creams with ingredients of things that only you love and things that I know you love.

Fuck, you didn't make Red Rooster ice cream, did you? Yuck. That would have been a great idea. They all have ingredients that would actually... Mitch, yours is a sorbet. I just want to start out. A sorbet? What's that?

Yours is a sorbet. Like the things you get at Circular Quay in the... That's gelato. Oh, is that not the same shit? Sorbets are made without cream. Sorbet is ice. It's ice and fruit juice. Oh, okay.

Interesting. I don't mind a fucking sorbet. Yours is a sorbet. Jenny, yours is most definitely an ice cream in the truest sense of the word. So what I've done is I want you to taste them and I want you to tell me whether or not you think it will cream. I'm scared. Okay. And whether we could go to market with this cream.

Correct. Whether we could take it to Janine Ellis. The Mitchell Coombs cream? Yeah. Or the Jenna Benson cream. Did you make one for yourself? No, I did not. Oh.

The Ninja Cream only comes with two tubs. Oh. So I only had two tubs. It's a real process. Jenna, write that down for his birthday. Extra only comes with two tubs. Oh. So he only had two tubs. It's a real process. Jenna, write that down for his birthday. Extra tubs. I'll probably be over it by September. Because that'd fuck me off too, if I've got two in the wash and I'm like

I was going to make some cream, but now what? You also have to pre-freeze. So yesterday I Uber-reached a bunch of ingredients over and they have to freeze for at least 12 hours. So they were rock solid. In fact, Jenna's bubbled and swelled overnight. I had to do some- Oh my God, why?

That's why it took me so long. I mean, it's obviously behind the scenes stuff, but I had to bath hers in boiling water in order for it to melt down. To defrost it. To defrost. It had swollen. Oh my God.

It was bubbling when I opened it. I'm scared. So it's perhaps not as straightforward as you made out that you can just turn anything into ice cream. There's a bit more to it. Correct. Because I've actually, it's like my phone can hear me. I've seen TikToks coming up, but it's only people anti-influencing the creamy.

Being like, don't buy it. It fucks up so easily. Like theirs was broken. Mine's amazing. Although it did struggle with yours, Mitchell. The chunks it really struggled with. Oh, the chunks. So this is going to be the same.

We should have bought the Ninja Sweet. We'll blend it first, then cream it so there's no chunks. I recorded the process, so I will play out the ingredients in yours, Mitchell. You won't hear. Am I first? Yes, yours is first. Okay, all right. I'll take my headphones off.

The audience will know what you are drinking and the ingredients. You will not. Okay. So this is me creating Mitchell's cream. All right, I'm in the Idjim kitchen. This is Mitchell's Ninja Creamy. Now, Mitch's favourite drink is, of course, rosé. So what I have created is a rosé,

almost a frosé of sorts Ninja Creamy. But what goes with rosé? I thought, let's give Mitchell a real picnic experience. Blue Stilton vintage aged blue cheese and, of course, quince paste. So, Will It Creamy? Let's find out. And I have it here before me. So, Mitchell.

Hands out of your ears, Mitchell. Out of your ears. I've got you. It's all good. I've played it. I almost dozed off a bit there. Oh, God. I removed all sensors.

I blocked my ears, closed my eyes. I was having a nice little moment. I don't know how excited you are by Will It Cream. Well, I can't hear anything while my ears are blocked, you idiot. I've got you a spoon, and on the table is your tub of freezing cold ice cream. So, Mitch, there you go. You said it was fruity. First observations of my cream.

That's not. I'm currently jiggling the container side to side and it's definitely like a liquid. Well, let me be honest with you. Yours is more a, it's something you drink with your girlfriends. It's more of a, I really could put this in a cocktail glass, in fact, and you could sip this down. Is it just one thing or have you put a few things together? It's a few of the things that you love in life. Okay.

And I have to guess what it is. Yeah, go for it. Why not? All right. And tell me if it few of the things that you love in life. Okay. And I have to guess what it is? Yeah, go for it. Why not? All right. And tell me if it will cream. Oh, I'm really scared. Okay. No, it's more sorbet if I dig deep.

Down the bottom. It's melted at the top. There we go. Yum. All right. Once again, not going to eat on Mike. Yeah, don't worry. Don't piss off the wokies.

Oh, it's a big mouthful. Oh. Oh. I can smell it from over here. Can you, Jenna? Oh, yeah. Oh, my God. Oh. There's a lot going on there. Yeah, it from over here. Can you, Jenna? Oh, my God. There's a lot going on there. Yeah, it's complex flavors.

Yeah. My cream is not that straightforward. What the fuck? Okay, I know that there's rosé in there because drink with my girlfriends. Oh, God. Correct. The rosé was the before taste. Then there's a whole lot of bullshit going on in the middle.

It's actually quite simple, Mitchell. This is a three-ingredient cream. So rosé. the before taste, and then there's a whole lot of bullshit going on in the middle. It's actually quite simple, Mitchell. This is a three-ingredient cream. So rosé. Oh, my God. It's not like bickies and cheese, is it? Well, I thought to myself, what goes so well with rosé? Cheese. What cheese?

Well, of course, it's the best Castello Blue cheese you can buy. Oh, no. You know I hate blue. I know. You know that's my least favourite. Also, you need a nice sweetness to offset it. So I've added a chunk of Maggie Beer's own quince paste. I thought I could taste something in there that I liked.

Yes. The blue cheese is now just loitering on my tongue. Why is it so sour? Yeah, I'm really not sure. Oh, my God. Honestly, it's not bad. Oh, he's going back. I'm going to have a second scoop.

Off mic. Having so much. I'm going to commentate what I can taste. Quince paste. Alcohol in general. Oh, there's the tea. It really gets you. It's quite nice that they all take turns in the spotlight.

They've not mixed together at all. They all just go, woohoo, it's me, Quince Pace. They're sharing. I'm impressed with the two big globules you took down. Did you do a whole fucking bottle of rosé? Yeah. What a waste. I also had to add a little bit of water because I was worried it wouldn't freeze.

So it's watered down just a touch to have that freeze element. I don't know what's happened here, but it's really strong. Like the alcohol is so strong. Really? I tried it downstairs. I'm a bit fucked after happened here, but it's really strong. Like, the alcohol is so strong. Really? I tried it downstairs. I'm a bit fucked after two loads of cream. Yeah. Woo!

Yeah. Did you enjoy it? Will it cream? What's the verdict? Oh, it's still just... I'm not kidding. Like, it's just reverberating through my body now. Like, the cheese just goes, still here, mate.

Still here. All right. Well, you process the verdict. Jenna Benson. I'm so scared. Steal here. All right. Well, you process the verdict. Jenna Benson. I'm so scared. My dear friend. I love that you've actually thought about it. And like, what would they like?

Wine and cheese in an ice cream. I don't know if I would let this one go to market. I said to you. What could Jenna like? I can't think of anything. I put my hand on heart. They're all ingredients that you love. Oh, the blue cheese, I mean, I guess.

But you like cheese and crackers. Fuck you for that. You love a cheese board. If you'd put a gorgeous brie in there, it would have been a different story. That would have been just Will It Cream. It's already cream, really. Well, let's get the idiots involved. This is the ingredients in Jenna's cream concoction.

I can listen to this, right? Yes, you can listen to this. Okay. Block your ears, Jenna. Okay. This is Jenna's creamy concoction I have crafted for her. Now, as Jenna has lived many lives, I am hearkening this back to her days in the medieval European countryside.

It is mead, ale, sourdough bread, and, of course, thickened Jersey cow cream. Will it cream me? Let's find out. What do you think? That sounded like a lot. No, Jenny. I'm just doing a poker face. I don't want to give away anything, Jenna.

Yours is, of course, three ingredients as well. I thought fair's fair. Is that a rule in the ninja community? No, no. There's no rules in the ninja community. However, Jenna's worked better because Jenna's. Hers looks like something you would buy at Circular Key. Jenna's is mostly, I mean, it is definitely an ice cream.

It's got, there's cream in it. I can say that. I'm happy to say that. So, Jenna, here is your ninja cream-based concoction. Oh, God, it's got a bit more blue cheese. Oh, I need something to wash it down. Have some water. Sorry.

Oh, what now? Yours actually looks like ice cream, Jenna. Can I have a look? Can you hold it up to the camera as well? You hold it upside down. Mitch, it's actually ice cream. Show Mitch. That looks beautiful.

Yeah, but I'm unsure about what it is. I promise you nothing off about it. Have a big scoop. There you go. You're on camera. She's about to take it off. Yeah, do it off mic. She's tasting.

Oh, she's gone full. Use your words. Into the mic. What is that? That's tasting. Oh, she's gone full. Use your words. Into the mug. What is that? That's wine. Is it wine? No. It's some sort of alcohol.

Have some more. Can I try it? Yeah, of course. Wait, wait. Oh, put it in your mouth. Don't lick it. You're not a cat. Tastes like bread.

Tastes like bread. Correct. Is it bread? Key ingredient. I've just had my scoop. Key ingredient is sourd like bread. Correct. Is it bread? Key ingredient. I've just had my scoop. Key ingredient is sourdough bread. I can taste the sourdough. Interesting to note that you've not gone for a fucking spoonful of either.

Oh, no, I've tried them both in the kitchen. Did you? Yeah. It's the texture of Jenna's one. I just had some. I'll try some. Oh, I can taste the bread. Yeah.

I can taste all of it. That's awful. There's some. We have to taste. That's why I imagined fishies. You told us that you weren't going to try and fuck with us. Jenna, what are the other two ingredients? Any guesses, Jenna?

Okay, definitely bread. Mm-hmm. Some form of alcoholic drink. Such as? Lock one in. If it's not wine. B-W-S. The W stands for wine.

Correct. What else is there? A spirit. No, I would have started with the B. A beer. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I can.

The yeasty flavor of beer. Just tell her. Jenna, what I've done is, hearkening back to your medieval days, I've created you an ice cream to remind you of your very first childhood. This is a medieval-inspired sourdough stone-baked bread, Jersey cow cream from the New South Wales Northern Rangers, thickened cream, as thick as you could get, and then, of course, mead, which is essentially ancient beer.

It is a hop brew fermented beer. Oh, my God. It's delicious. Yours, it's hard to compare them. It's like chalk and cheese, isn't it? Chalk and fucking blue cheese. I really don't. I really don't.

The aftertaste on that is I imagine what a fish tastes when it gets a little balled up piece of bread on a hook. Yeah. It's so bready. The crumbs just keep on that is I imagine what a fish tastes when it gets a little balled up piece of bread on a hook. Yeah. It's so bready. It's lingering. The crumbs just keep reappearing in the gaps of my teeth. There's also black sesame seeds in there from the stone-break sourdough. See, at a glance, it looks like passion fruit ice cream.

Yes. That's what the little black sheet looks like. It does. And then you have a scoop and it's bready as all fuck. Oh, it's so bready. Well, this is it last night before I froze it. The issue I had with Jenna's, Mitchell, is that the bread absorbed it and the beer bubbled over, so it was double the volume.

And then Mitchell's looked god awful. I don't think I want to see the before shot. I don't think I want to see it. Oh, God, it's shaming me. It's so much worse now that I know what it looked like before. It's terrible. And then Jenna, there are your ingredients. Look at it all.

Oh, my God. Jersey cream, beer, bread. There's so much bread. Yeah, I really went all out. My Ninja Creamy also was struggling with the blue cheese chunks. This is what TikTok says. Apparently it's easily put in duress. It is. Yeah. It is. Did you enjoy your creams, guys?

Enjoy is a huge word. I won't be going back for, well I did go back for seconds, didn't I? I won't be going back for thirds. I won't be going back for fourths. What a dreadful waste of rosé't I? I won't be going back for thirds. I won't be going back for fourths. What a dreadful waste of rose, most importantly. You know what? I couldn't agree more on that mead, that beer, Jenna. Apologies.

Deeply fermented, that one. Deeply? Yeah. Should we go on that note? I think maybe let's end the show. Please. I'm still getting breadcrumbs in my mouth. I can smell Jenna's sourdough and it's fucking foul.

Did you just add a new syllable to foul? Here we go. Foul. Oh, no. You know my favourite animal has always been an owl. Jenna, there's no need to have such a nasty scowl on your face. Oh, God. I just remembered.

What? I showered this morning and my sister had just woken up and she saw me in my towel. That sounds normal. It does. I have to get rid of the rose from the desk. Oh, yeah, you better. No need to gravel. Yuck, it's on my fucking fingers. Ohrible. It does. I have to get rid of the rose from the desk. Oh, yeah, you better. No need to gravel. Yuck, it's on my fucking fingers.

Oh, it's really. Well, then don't finger it. You've always had this problem. I. Blue cheese. I told you the blue cheese really ruined it. Put your nose in there and smell. Oh, my God.

Anyway. Let's get out of here. Oh, that was, I think, really nice. But also, I don't have a belly. Does anyone have mouthwash? Yeah. Oh. Do you actually?

Hold on. No, I've got. What have you got? Just wait. I'm so impatient. I don't think it's on my desk. Oh, no. Listerine strips.

Oh. I carry them with me. Okay, that'll help. Thank you. Passion idiot on the street. I need one as well. Spearmint. What the fuck?

Anyway. That's the best flavor. No, wrong. Why? I prefer pepper. To be fair, they were on sale at Chem one as well. Spearmint? What a fuckwit. Anyway. That's the best flavour. No, wrong. Why? I prefer pepper. To be fair, they were on sale at Chemist Warehouse, so. You prefer pepper? Yeah, peppermint.

Just pepper. Not pepper on its own. Fuck. I always get comments, Stephen's always like, God, your breath always tastes fresh. It's because he doesn't know I've got these in my pocket. It tastes fresh. I have so many little tabs.

Yeah. Alright, well, hope this podcast, what are we doing? I thought we were not eating on the podcast. That's why I didn't put mine in. Mine's in, but I'm not going to chew it. I'm just going to let it... Oh, God, it's burning the rim of my mouth. This is awful.

Let's go, let's go. Bye, bye, it is. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to AD Debrief, our secret segment on the end. I'm chewing in my own secret segment.

I don't care. Oh, no. You can just not do it into the mic. Okay. See? It can be done. Not in Jenna's mic either. No!

That was not me. It's not funny, Cheery. No, I know. It's a real phobia. Speaking of mental, has anyone been watching Baby Randy? Oh, my God. No, and I don't want to. What? Sometimes I don't know why I bother with you. I don't want to watch it.

But why? But if it was you who discovered it, oh my god, you'd all have to get the full lowdown. Yeah, and have I ever had this attitude when you talk about a show you watch? No, I'm just, I'm not. I don't go, and I won't. It's the content. I want you to talk about it. I just don't have any interest. You'd like it. Really? What's the plot line?

Because I'm more interested in Dasher and Dancer. Dasher and Dancer. The reindeer. Vixen. Rudolph. Comet. Comet. He's my favourite.

Y'all slept on Comet. Oh, everyone slept on Comet, yeah. That was a really good whistle from me. That was a great whistle, yeah. Okay, sorry. Talk to me about that. You know that old lady thing? You'd know from all the parties you go to.

Yeah. Tomato sauce. Okay, sorry. Talk to me about Baby Randy. You know that old lady thing? You'd know from all the parties you go to. Yeah. Tomato sauce. No. Oh. Tomato sauce. I can't think of anything that has a fucking T in it. T's ready. T's ready.

Cut the cake. Here's the knife so you can cut the cake. No, you can't do that. I feel like the sentence has to end in T. Can you tell us about Baby Randy? Yeah, it's just about a stalker. And you think that she's going to be the most deranged one in the series. Don't spoil it.

But then, yeah, twists and turns every step of the way. Why would you care about spoilers? You don't want to watch it. I will end up. I never want to watch it. I'm going to watch it in a year. Then make you all hear about it in a year. Oi, it's actually really good for people like us.

And when I say people like us, I mean. Rich people. Well, there's that. But also I meant like. It's a joke, everyone. Yeah, I feel like I do need to stop down and clarify that. So it's good for people with ADHD, whether it be diagnosed or undiagnosed, because they absolutely do not fuck about.

Oh. Like there's no big build up and then there's a hook at the end of episode one and you're like, oh, now it's getting juicy. Just from the absolute moment you hit play. Oh, good. Game on.

That I can get around. So just start watching it and if you hate the first episode, which is like 28 minutes, then that's fine. Or even if you tap out halfway through. Just the first 10 minutes

is more than enough to get a taste of what it's going to be. I'm on Baby Reindeer TikTok where I am seeing people be like, this is the real Margaretta in real life. These are real tweets written by Margaret, this is the real Margaretta in real life. These are real tweets written by Margaret in real life. Martha.

Martha in real life. Whoa. She really tweeted this in December 2003. Well, it's based on a true story. And that guy actually had a stalker. Now, isn't it his story? Yeah. Yeah.

That's so cool. The lead actor. And he's a really good actor. Have you ever had a stalker, Mitchell? Not to that fucking extent, no. Have you ever had a stalker full stop? Oh, sort of, yes. Really?

Mid. You don't want to kind of speak it into existence, do you? Exactly. Oh, God. Because they could be listening to it. Totally. I was sent that rat poison that one time, that note with a huge condom and blood and white powder, and they threatened to murder me.

Yeah, that was weird. Then they had a page of a novel about a murder mystery novel, but they highlighted different words in the sentence to read, I will kill you. That's really scary. Oh my God. Frightening. We sent it to the police. I don't think you've told me about that before.

I actually was an open to police investigation. I sent it to KISS and I opened it and white powder exploded everywhere. Shit. So we had to get that tested for it to be- I think you tested it yourself. Anthrax, yeah. With a good blow. On my tongue.

No, but from then on the receptionist has to open all the letters that we get oh what a tedious ass job that'd be so they hire people with just no sort of value and they go because if you drop dead imagine the paper cuts on her my god actually no not even for our receptionist and it kisses the most beautiful girl in the world yeah she's gorgeous i love amy she gives me a sparkling water every week look at this yeah yeah i swear she's gorgeous. I love Amy. She gives me a sparkling water every week. Look at this. Yeah. I swear she's spiked it with vodka. Can you taste that?

That tastes like that is vodka and sparkling water. I don't know why she'd spike it. No, maybe not her, but someone at that company has spiked my bottle because I took a sip and I went, fuck me, that tastes like a vodka soda. Oh, no, it's because it's the fancy one. But it never usually tastes like that. Oh. She gives me one every week. You won't be with us much longer.

Oh, dear. You've been poisoned. Ah, well, I've had a good run You have So you've liked Baby Randy It's a Coombs hot pick for the week It's a new segment we're doing Yeah it's worth a watch

Why not What have you been watching It was nice Because I've not been excited About a new show in a long time You know you're like Oh my god I'm going to sneak in an episode

Yeah I've just been re-watching Old comfort shows Yeah I started The Three Body Problem It was fucking awful What's that Oh my god i saw the trailer

and it's on netflix right yeah it's from the creators of game of thrones and it's um the three body problem is a problem in physics where in that if you're in a galaxy that has three bodies like centers of mass like the sun three suns you know like we orbit around our sun there's three suns everyone will die because there's too much gravitational pull. It's, like I said, bored. Yeah, I was going to say, you lost me. But also there's aliens in the sky. You also retained that information quite well. Yeah, well done.

It sounded like you knew what you were talking about. Perhaps you didn't, but it sounded like it. Sure, there's a physicist listening being like, well, you actually got it wrong. Sex sounds fun. Oh, dear. What are you watching, Jenna? I've watched The Three-Body Problem. Mitch has watched Baby Reindeer.

I've certainly not watching her mouth lately. I've been watching her mouth lately. Trouble in Paradise already. Certainly not watching her attitude. No. Yeah. You better be watching your food intake because if you're going to be a new mother, you need to have greens. She's eating for two.

No, I don't care about- Don't shame me. I mean getting the right nutrients. If you let me finish. Oh, good thing you didn't try my fucking cheese ice cream. You're not supposed to have that sort of cheese when you're up the duff. Well, thank God she had the beer ice cream instead. I'm calling docs.

No, the doctor says she could have one. Yeah. Did they? Yeah, I'm allowed one. Are you allowed to have one cigarette or smoke when pregnant? Like one. I mean, you really fucking shouldn't be smacking a durry down your face when you're pregnant. Yeah, it's not good.

Not ideal. Are you enjoying the new building? Because Jenna only just moved in. I did. I've been here for like two months. It's been a month, hasn't it? No, not for me. Well, I've been here for a month.

Yeah, but I hadn't officially. We came here before WSFM. Jonesy and Amanda. Yes. I feel like a lot of the teething issues have been overcome. And so I'm feeling a bit more comfy here. And today literally was the first time that I wasn't in such a state of stress that I was able to look out the window and go, God, that's a gorgeous view of Sydney. Usually I'm so much in a tizz that I can't appreciate

that. I had such a nice little moment for my show because the night show, my night radio show is now in Brisbane. They broadcast it to Brisbane now. And I had a call the other night. He won something. And he's like, can I just say, welcome to Brisbane now And I had a call the other night He wants something And he's like Can I just say Welcome to Brisbane I really enjoy hearing you I didn't know who you were But I've really enjoyed your program

And I went Isn't that nice That's like those little things Does he think that you live in Brisbane I think he might When he said Welcome to Brisbane He thinks you've moved there

Oh he thinks I'm a local programmer Yeah Oh no You should be like Next time you're driving past KSFM Brisbane Wave I'll wave back. No, I think they'll demolish that building.

Well then how the fuck are you on air? Well, via a satellite like the Parks Dish put the man on the moon in 1969. They didn't put the man on the moon, they were just able to beam the images globally. Your words were, Buzz Aldrin slept at Parks the night before he went to the moon. Yeah, that was my words You said it so eloquently Yeah, a lot going on in parks That's where you're wrong

Yeah They've got a dish A lot of them, development on those roads They're new roads If you drive in the central west, they're all done up Remember how I was saying that I hate getting stopped at red lights? What's worse is the amount of fucking roadworks between Sydney and Bogengate. Oh, every five minutes there's some lollipop slut in a high viz.

And I'm like, go away. What are we doing here? Do you have Waze? Yeah. Yeah, it's good. I use Waze for the hidden cops and the roadworks and the fog. Fog warning. Again, that's not really a concern of mine.

I don't drive illegally. Remember when you said that you lie and put in waves? Yep, just to calm down traffic. I'll say, cop up ahead, and there's not. But it slows people down. I've saved lives, unknowingly. So you slow everyone else down, but you don't slow yourself down. Oh no, it gives me the chance

to get in front of them all. In fact, I take it as an opportunity to speed up. That's true. Oh, fuck. What can you do? Oh, that was a great two episodes. Why don't we take a week off? We are going to have to take some time off, actually.

You're in Bali. Yeah, we'll just do our usual. We haven't even fucking discussed it. We'll just have to do our usual mid-year break because June, I'm pretty much out. We'll obviously be here for Jenna's birthday. Yeah, it's my birthday. But then I'll be doing comedy shows and holidays and whatever. When are you in Bali?

What dates? 13th onwards. For a week? I think more than that. Oh, really? Well, the 20th, I go to America for two weeks. Oh, okay. Yeah, that'll work out well if we take the break then.

So, perfect. And on the 4th, it's my birthday. What the fuck are you doing in America? Jenna, please. We're talking. We know that. I'm joking. Don't worry.

I've fucking, what do you call it? What do you do when you fold a page? Bookmarked it. I was going to say earmarked it. Is that a thing? That's a thing as well. That's what they do on sharks and dogs. It's also something we do to sheep.

Yeah. We mark the lambs. I think anything with an ear that can be marked. I'm going to America for two weeks. Imagine instead of asking someone, have you ever had your ears pierced? You say, have you been marked? anything with an ear that can be marked. I'm going to America for two weeks. Imagine instead of asking someone, have you ever had your ears pierced, you say, have you been marked? Sorry, you're going to America, in and out of LA. Yeah.

I actually don't even know the fucking dates. I truly, we just booked it on a whim. Who's we? Survey dates. I'm going with me, my sister Rachel, and my high school best friend, Kristen. Cute. Oh, the lessee. The lessee, yeah.

The one that didn't join us at Mardi Gras. Freshly out. No, she was first Mardi Gras and she just didn't come. She'll be ready next year. That's all right. Hopefully. Or the year after. Isn't that brothel stuff really interesting?

She was a very cool, calm collector. I just, I would love to know why that's not a thing because obviously old men like Russell can get their knob wet as they please yeah but women apparently can't at a run the what you know what do what do they do it's something i never thought about same and i'm glad they shed a lot onto it but she also responded to you as if you were stupid asking about male i think she was like don't be ridiculous stupid no but she also said it as if she'd already mentioned it to us. Yeah. She was like, well, no, I've just said it.

What were you having? I feel like there was a lot of beating around the bush there from her. Totally, yeah. I could hear the beating in the bush behind her. Oh, stop it. Oh, don't. Jenna, that was disgusting. Oh, don't. If we can't eat, then we can't squelch on the podcast.

Now, isn't it just the sounds of chewing? Huh? Isn't it just the sounds of chewing? Just like any slurping, that sort of stuff. I've just Googled different kinds of phobias. What do you think aquaphobia is the phobia of? Go, game. You two.

It sounds like it should be water, but I bet it isn't. Correct. Aquaphobia is a fear of water. The word aqua is Latin for water and phobos is Greek for fear. Oh, I thought that was a trick question. Yeah, me too. So it was water. What about this?

Oh, this is hard. Dentophobia. Dentist. Correct. This is not hard at all. So it was water. What about this? Oh, this is hard. Dentophobia. Dentist. Correct. This is not hard at all. I hate this game. Anthropophobia. Anthropophobia.

Stop it. Anthropophobia. People. Correct, Jenna. Wow, you're a genius. You're beating Mitchell. How could you survive with a phobia of humans? Oh, this.

You're not going to get this. Cotoptrophobia. Catoptrophobia. Catastrophe? No, someone. Jenna, do you want to try one? I have no idea. An irrational fear of mirrors.

Oh. Well, that doesn't give it away in the answer, does it? No. Socialphobia. That's self-explanatory. What is it? Social. Social interactions, whatever. Someone's scared of bread. Fuck off. Shut up. What is it? Social. Social interactions, whatever.

Someone scared of bread. Fuck off. Shut up. It's social phobia. And the last one. Jesus. Lockyophobia. It's the phobia of pipe cleaners.

No. Phobia of having pregnancy, which Jenna, Mitch and I have diagnosed you with. What, that phobia? Well, she clearly isn't that scared. No. I think you are. I'm embracing it. Boring phobia is what I've got. Not what't that scared. No, I'm embracing it. Boring phobia is what I've got. Not what I've got, sorry, what I'm into.

What have you got? I don't have it, I don't have it. Anyway, are we done here? Yeah, I'm ready. Thanks for listening, guys. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today. That's all. It's 2%.

So we do. Catch you on Monday, idiots. See you guys. Love you. Bye, bub. Bye. Is it just me? A. See you guys. Love you. Bye, Bob. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches.

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