Is It Just Me? - #32: Sound of Silence

Episode Date: June 14, 2020

In this episode: Churi has only just discovered Pretty Little Liars (06:41) These phrases make people horny apparently lmao (12:47) Pregnant pandas (21:47) A new game 'sound of silence' (24:22) Our "secret segment" ADDebrief (36:13)   Follow us @coupleofmitches See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. A surge in young people inhaling the gas from cooking canisters known as names to get high. Some things make more sense than others. I've done everything for you. I've put my career on hold. I could have been anything if I'd had the talent. Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for. This is leadership. I think he's one of the greatest leaders we've ever had. Do you?

Yeah. Well, good hope. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Should one of us be Mitch and the other be Mitchell just to make things easier? You're Mitch. I only call you Mitchell when you're being annoying. You always call me Mitchell.

Oh. Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coon. Thank you. Hello., one and all. How are we all? I'm pretty bloody good, yeah? I'm very well. Groundskeeper Jenna, our third wheel's here as per usual. Hi.

Not for much longer possibly. Jenna, you must be thrilled with all the COVID restrictions easing in New South Wales, at least. Oh, yes. All the gyms are reopening, which means Zumba, your precious Zumba, is back in action. Yeah, it's not the same with just 10 people. How many people are usually in your Zumba classes? Because in my mind, I picture a class of 10 or so. No, like 30 to 40.

Oh, my God. How many classes per week? Depends. I used to go twice a week. But there's multiple classes a week. It's not like it's jam-packed because there's only one a week. No, no. There's like four. And it led by what? One cult leader or are there two multiple classes a week. It's not like it's jam-packed because there's only one a week. No, no, there's like

four. And it led by what, one cult leader or are there two? There's two. What is Zumba for those who don't know? I didn't realise this community was so alive and well. Oh, it is very much alive. Zumba is dancing Spanish style.

Spanish dancing, right. You've hooked me. It was a very big hype in, what would you say, 2011? It was probably 10, 11. Yeah, my mum was like, you know what? Fuck it. I'm going to try. I'm going to try Zumba.

And she just never got around to doing it. Well, you know, I started after all that. So I started once the phase died. Oh, okay. So you are a loyal OG fan. Yes. But people don't go there to learn how to dance. No, no.

Yeah, you're allowed to be unco. That's just so weird. You're adults dancing in a room out of time sweating. I mean, you've got to burn calories somehow. I know you're not quite familiar with that lesson, but I just need to let you know that you're meant to. I got an email back from my gym and they're like, hi, Mitch, great news.

The gym is reopening. And I'm like, this should go straight to the junk. I'm not going back. They're like, your membership is now back. The gym is reopening. And I'm like, this should go straight to the junk. I'm not going back. They're like, your membership is now back. You're going to start paying again. So I'm going to have to cancel it. I don't know how I'm going to get out of that. I don't have the heart to tell them because they're probably going to have a loss of,

a decline in revenue anyway with people not being there for what, months? Oh God, yeah. And I already used an awful excuse to get over it last time. I said there was a death in the family. Oh my God. I said I'm not going to be able to come for the foreseeable future you know what we'll waive all fees even the fee for the dongle you keep it you have to pay about 80 for that fucking dongle what dongle oh the dongle where are my car keys oh the past get in like all right you've signed

up three months free we just need a holding fee of 90 for your pink dongle i don't know like you have i'm sorry yeah you can't get in the building without it. I had to pay fucking 90 bucks for a dongle. Yeah, that's a scam. Why don't you sneak in with someone when they go in? Oh, don't do that. Oh my God. Because me and my housemates,

sorry, my housemate and I, we sometimes go to the gym together and if he opens the door with his pass and I walk in behind him, he gets a phone call from security at the gym being like, you let in someone. They have to scan their own pass. It feels so unnatural letting him in, and then we have to wait for the door to close,

and then I then buzz myself in. Buzz yours in, yeah. But it's all for formalities. And I once let my friend in because I was meeting for lunch and I wasn't quite done at the gym. I let her in. I was like, just sit on the couch in the air con. Oh, did I get blasted?

Really? Are they always watching? It's like Big Brother. Yeah, it actually is. It's 24-7 surveillance because it's a gym. They don't trust everyone in there at night. But yeah, I think it's just their policy to call people and be like, ah, ah, ah, ah, ah.

Don't let anyone, whether they're a member or not, behind you when you go through the door. Jeez, making Zumba sound body good, Jenna. There's no narcs there watching you 24-7. I might join. But anyway, I'm looking forward to all the studios and gyms being back open again. God, I could do with it. This might be your last show and we are kicking it off with a bang.

We're celebrating. Last week was your birthday. This week is your final show, potentially. Okay, thanks for letting me know. This could be Jenna's third final show. Quick question. Whatever happened to bloody producer Alex? That intern that you brought in here to oust Jenna?

I don't know. She interns on my show for two weeks and she hasn't shown up. That was back in episode 28, right? Yeah, 28. We pitted them against each other. She won Jenna's job but has not turned up ever since. Exactly. She hasn't shown up. She hasn't messaged me and she hasn't come to my

Kiss Night show either. Okay. Maybe we should be checking on her duty of care. Oh yeah, maybe actually. If it was me, you'd be like, oh, who cares? Oh, we'd probably be the one that killed you. Yeah. We are back this week with, now, I don't want to say too much, but it's a challenge, Midge.

I've come up with, and I'm going to put you on the spot. I know you don't like doing these things, and normally you're the one putting me in the awkward position. No, see, you're someone who, when you're put on the spot, you can, that's really actually where you thrive best whereas i like to be prepared and organized and you know i don't like being put in scenarios where i'm left feeling awkward like you know prank calls and whatever and there's been a couple of times on this show where you've said to me oh i've got a segment planned for you but

i'm not going to tell you what it is and sometimes it works out sometimes it doesn't one time you made me interview someone and i had no idea who they were when i was talking to them instant interview harry jousey that actually did quite well in the end but then there also was that time that you tried to make me prank call someone who had a lost pet no that never happened that was all that was no that was well yeah i pulled the pin so is this going to be something that i abort mid-segment? Am I going to like this thing? There's no dead budgies involved.

You're going to love it. Actually, you might not love it, but you're going to have to put it that way. Right. Okay. Stand by that coming up. So am I going to be the one embarrassed? Oh, yeah, of course you are. I'm not embarrassing myself.

Because I don't mind that. I don't like embarrassing other people in prank calls. Oh, well, it's a two way street. You might be embarrassing someone else more. We'll other people in prank calls. No. Oh, well, it's a two-way street. Whatever. You might be embarrassing someone else more. We'll find out in a bit. Plus, we need to start the show with an Is It Just Me each. It's the name of the show.

Basically, it's something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate, and we both take a turn. It could be anything. Neither of us know what we're about to say. Yes, we both bring one each. Yeah, exactly. And so I'll just let you know that mine a little bit later on it's about naughty time in the bedroom you know i'm saying you're getting some well i can't confirm

one tonight actually social distancing is still a thing no i'm not okay all right but anyway we'll be talking about that later on all right let's start with mine then. Here we go. Is it just me or? Do some old TV shows really not age well? Oh, so many don't. Oh, God. I've just started watching Pretty Little Liars. First of all, one red flag. They're not fucking pretty.

They're not all pretty. Who are these little liars and why are they telling fibs? I never got amongst this show either. It was a great show. Have you seen it? Of course you have. I'll tell you why. They're not all pretty. Who are these little lies and why are they telling fibs? I never got amongst this show either. It was a great show. Have you seen it? Yes. Of course you have.

I'll tell you why. So you're not re-watching it? No, I'm just watching it. The reason Jenna likes it is because there's a little brat of a character named Jenna. Is there? Reminds me of you. She's blind. She was blinded by the girls after she was sleeping with her stepbrother on the night the girl was murdered.

It was all very dramatic. That's some bold and the Beautiful shit there. And she's played by an Australian actress who was in Home and Away. Yeah, she is. Oh, Taron Egerton or someone, I don't know. Taman Sersok. Taman Sersok.

Sounds like fucking Harry Potter's girl. Is this that show that everyone was talking about when I was in Year 10 where it was like, oh, something to do with A? Yep, A. Yes, now don't you tell me who A is because I don't know. And this is why I'm embarrassed because I'm hooked. I need to know who the fuck A is.

It goes to seven seasons. Are you that hooked? But the thing is, it goes to seven seasons. They're in year 12 this season. Is it really going to go up until when they're all fucking leaving college? Oh, my God. I don't see how they can stretch it out. This show is woeful.

The storyline is five girls and then there's another one and she's a lesbian, but the parents don't accept it and she won't tell anyone. Their best friend was killed. It's highly insinuated that they had a hand in killing her, but no one knows. Then they don't think she's dead because she is sending notes from beyond the grave. If A, the friend. The dead girl, Alison. Oh.

She was killed, but who knows? But was she killed? Well, that's the thing. Apparently she's alive, but then they find the body under the house. And the reason they find the body is because the girl's lesbian lover was living in it. But they can't tell anyone that she's a lesbian because the family will die. Yeah, this literally sounds like Neighbours. That is so.

When you take it out of context like that, it sounds really far-fetched and a little bit stupid. Well, at the time, it was a fantastic show. I'm sure it was. It was thrilling. But in 2020, a 16-year-old dating her fucking math teacher is not on. I always find that characters in TV shows, when you're young, they don't seem that young. But now that we're older, 16 is so young.

Did you know that Rose on Titanic was only 17? No. What? Yeah. And when she literally devoted her life to this random man, Jack, that she met once and like had three days on a ship with, and it was only the last night on the ship that they decided they liked each other and started parking in that car. I was barely 17 when I was touching myself, let alone fucking in the back of a bloody

bug. Yes. I literally, I, at the time was so attached to that love story on Titanic, I was like, oh, my God, they were meant to be together. But now I'm like, oh, she's way too young to be forming any kind of adult decisions like that. Oh, my God, I pictured her being at least 30. I thought she was 30.

No, it's when you do the maths because the movie is set in 1998 and the character, the old Rose, is like 100 and something and then you realise the Titanic sunk in 1912. So she was only bloody 17. I did the maths at one point and then Googled it and yeah, Rose and Titanic is only 17. Oh my God, that's ridiculous. Well, I was actually on the Titanic.

Jen, that's ridiculous. Do you lean way too far into this joke that we have that you've had multiple lives? Also say it with some fucking conviction. I was also on the top. Sorry. Fucking hell. Anyway, Pretty Little Lies, do yourself a favour and don't watch it.

And watch it. You'll be hooked and you'll be embarrassed that you're rooting for a lesbian who killed the doctor's dad. I'm so confused by the whole thing. I would also say that Friends hasn't aged well. It's not as funny as I recall. Little Britain hasn't aged well.

Just last week it was ripped off air for blackface i didn't even know that happened but apparently that was okay at the time sex in the city too hasn't aged very well either it's all about the man and following the man's dream not following your own independence like fuck off yeah right that is that is a bit off isn't it i thought it was the exact opposite that's what everyone thinks but then in the end she ends up with spoiler alert big who the whole series she's like i want to be single and independent and follow my own career and then in the end she just falls in love with the man that she spent the whole series trying to leave just like on friends rachel got

off the plane why go to paris and chase your career bitch yeah i never what was she going to study she wasn't studying she had got a job like some really big fashion job in paris and the whole series was her trying to chase chasing her dreams trying to get in the fashion industry. And she left it for that fucking clown. Yes, that abominable man. Yeah. Ross. Ross. Anyway.

You know, one of my biggest fears is similar to Little Britain being taken off air, Kath and Kim being taken off air, because there is some shit that I think, God, they would not get away with that today. Really? Like what? There's a whole episode where it's about Kim being a racist and then Kath gets a DNA test and finds out that they're part Aboriginal.

Oh. It's, yeah. And they don't say anything offensive, but there's just enough nuance and innuendos that I'm just like, oh, that would blow up these days. Like Twitter was not around when that was made. Well, you know what I was thinking? Like I'm a Chris Lilley fan. But, like, some of the stuff is a bit on the nose.

Some? When he did Smouse, which wasn't even groundbreaking. Like, that character, there was nothing funny about it. He was just in blackface. Yeah, lots of Asian characters, too. Yeah, the mum. Jonah from Tonga. Jonah from Tonga, he did brownface.

And, I mean, even Jemay's a bit slow. I mean, Jermay's fine. Yeah, that'll probably stay on air. They won't rip that, but there's a lot of others that could afford to be ripped, really. It's a different time. Just be compassionate about others. Exactly. Hi, guys. Sorry, just interrupting the episode with a fresh update.

Literally, the day after we recorded this podcast, Netflix dropped all of Chris Lilley's shows that have blackface in them. All of them. We're bloody psychics. I'm telling you, maybe I's shows that have blackface in them. All of them. We're bloody psychics. I'm telling you, maybe I really am that psychic Mitchell Coombs on The Morning Show. I know. So all of them have been pulled. Literally everyone except for Lunatics, which is the new one, and Jemay Private School Girl.

Like I said, I literally said when we recorded that Jemay will stay on air. That's right. We called it. Yes, we did. Anyway, let's carry on with your idjim for the week. Is it just me or? Do you wish you had a sexy speaking voice? I kind of think I might even have one.

Even that sentence was a bit tricky to say with a lisp. Sexy speaking voice. I actually find lisps so endearing. I might even have one. Even that sentence was a bit tricky to say with a lisp. Sexy speaking voice. I actually find lisps so endearing. I think they're attractive. At least they're endearing, but there's a difference between endeared and, you know, dig down. There is! No, but I find it a turn on when someone has one.

Really? Because it's like, it's cute, you know? You can relate to it. Well, it's not just that, but anyway. So I've always known that my speaking voice is not exactly, you know, enticing. It's a little bit grating. Don't be harsh on yourself. But it was only listening to Lady Gaga's new album, Chromatica, on repeat for the last

few weeks, mind you, that I realised that she's really, in this album in particular, embraced just like the speaking voice rather than singing. Like, of course, Rain On Me, one of the biggest songs in the world right now, going to be one of the biggest songs of 2020 for sure. She does that, rain on me. And that's not singing. Yeah, exactly. That's the bit that everyone will sing along to or speak along to, I should say, once nightclubs

are allowed open again. Yeah. But there's another song. Do you know Sour Candy? Oh, with Blackpink. It's my favourite. That one. She barely sings in that at all.

And I was listening to it and I was like, oh, God, I really wish I could pull something like that off. I've given you a grab over there. I might be messed up, but I know what's up. You want a real taste. She sounds like a little bit doping out of it. Yeah, she does. But it still sounds good.

Like, I'm like, I could never do something like that. Listen. Yeah. It's like she's just had, like, some cough syrup and she's telling her partner to turn the TV off. Baby, turn the TV off. Yeah, she sounds like she's on the couch. Yeah, she does.

That's when I'm at my least sexy. One more time. Hold on. Especially in the beat of the music, though. It sounds hot. At least I'm not a fake. Come, come, unwrap. Sing it with me.

Come, come, unwrap me. I'll show you what's me. Close your eyes, don't peek. I literally feel so stoned. It's when you say come, I sort of lose the movement I was getting. Come, come, come and unwrap me. What if it was in an Australian accent? Like, I might be messed up.

Like, I just, I couldn't. I'm too bogan. I actually remember speaking to one of my friends about what sort of dirty talk they do in the bedroom. Because this is when I was living with this particular friend of mine. And they just hooked up with someone. They were like, sorry if I was too loud. And I was like, I didn't hear anything. were you saying and he goes oh you know the usual like oh fuck and i was like no i i don't think i could ever say the f-bomb in a sexual context how

absolutely disgusting would that be with my bogan twang fuck yeah No. They think they were hurting you. Are you okay? Is everything all right? Do you need a band-aid? No, I'm enjoying it, darling. Like, I've just dropped a can of baked beans on my toe. Fuck. Oh, fuck.

It's like if I cookies had a nap, went to check them and they were burnt. Oh, fuck. It's a weird thing, Dirty Talk, because I hate to think what has come out of my mouth. Because I'm not saying I'm silent. Like, I definitely say things, but I don't want to think about it. Because in the heat of the moment, all sorts of things seem appropriate to say. Is there anything that sort of gets you, you know? Well, yeah, but like, that's not what this is about.

So, I've got a list of dirty talk phrases from badgirlsbible.com because really I'm not confident saying any of them outside of a sexual context because of how unsexy my voice is. Jenna, here you go. Would you mind reading some of them out? Apparently these are some popular ones that people like to use in the bedroom. Okay. Jenna, and don't just read them for rote, please,

like you're doing a year six speech on public water restrictions. Do like a sensual voice. I can't. Yeah, I think just read them without overthinking it, Jenna. First one is, I need to feel you inside me. Well, quite literal, isn't it? Fuck me harder. You see, in Gaga's doughy American, fuck me harder. That could be great's doughy american fuck me harder that could be great but

with my voice no deeper deeper give me every last drop oh that's like you're in a bar and the bottle of vodka's run out because oh we're all out say it so give me the gummage. Give me every last drop. Yeah, no, that's not sexual at all. Next. No, God. Fill me up. Spank me, bite me, brand me, make me yours. Is that all part of one? That's one.

Are you sure that's one phrase? That's a lot of requests to make in one verse. So they want you to spank them. You have to jot that down. I'm just going to prioritise spank. Yeah. Spank first, then bite, then brand, and then make me yours. Brand?

Like a cow. Market me, finance me. Yeah. All right. What else is on this list? I'm not going to be embracing any of these. I've been a bad girl. I need to be punished.

Is that on the list, Jenna, or are you just... So what sort of things do you say, Mitchell? If any of these you are guilty of, please do share as she reads them out. What about this one? Give me some more. Nothing's inspired me. Just thinking about you makes me soggy. Soggy?

No, I've never told someone, oh, just thinking of you makes me soggy. These don't sound like dirty talk things you'd say mid-bonking. Yeah, this sounds like something long-distance relationship people send to each other. They get worse. Okay. I just want to be your little fuck doll. Oh, fuck doll.

That's macabre. Babe, is it too much to ask? All I want is to be your little fuck doll. It might sound greedy, but I need your cock so bad right now. Oh, God. Never said that. Don't start with a negative. Just be confident. It might sound a bit naughty, but do you mind

it? No, just fucking ask for it. No, that's actually reverse psychology. Is it? Yeah, if you say to someone, hey, like, I had this idea, like, I don't know if you'll be into it. Like, would it be fun if we, you know, that's a good way to, like, this sounds really fucked when i say trick them into it but it kind of makes them think i know i'm kinky i'll i'll do it i'll give it a go if you say i don't know if you'll be into this like this is a long one okay i'm ready i wish i could control myself better around you but when

i see you all i want to do is rip your clothes off and fuck you okay that's another long distance one. You wouldn't say that when you're in someone. These things, Hayden and I, you know, you start these. And then once you're almost two years in, you're really, these things fall away. Now it's just like, I don't know. What do you reckon? Should we rent that property we saw in Piedmont? So are you saying you have a sexy voice, Mitchell?

I think I have a sexy voice. Okay, try this one. Okay, pass me the list. Point it to him. Pass me the list. The last one. The last one, okay. Okay, so I'm going to say it.

This isn't how I say it to Hayden, but this is how I think I'm going to, I would say it if I was auditioning for the role of sexy guy. You know what I mean? Well, I could put on a voice where I'm doing an impression of a sexy person, like I did with Gaga. I'm talking about your actual voice. All right, all right, all right. I don't want to be able to walk tomorrow, so fuck me harder.

Oh, yeah. Oh, there's something in there for you. This one's a bit off. I don't want to film my face or hands after you're done with me. Hands? What are you doing with them? Is that even on the list or did you just think of that because this is the sort of thing that you would say? Yeah, I'm going to ask Hayden

to sit on my hand. Make it numb. I don't think there's any sitting on it involved. I don't want to feel my face or hands after you're done with me. Yeah, but you don't have to sit on the hands to... Anyway. What would they be doing with the hands?

I'm genuinely interested. Poor Hayden. If you don't know, then you're not doing a good job. What do you do with the hands? Tell me, if you know. Dr Nikki Goldstein, sexologist. I think it's implying that the person whom you are entering would really like to have such an epic orgasm that it renders them a little bit numb.

Oh. So in that case, their hands would then have no feeling. Yeah. Due to the fucking. Yeah. That's what I'm thinking. The face is also numb from the fucking. I would say so, yeah.

You probably knocked them out and probably hurt their spine or something. You'd be worried if you couldn't feel after the fucking. They'd paralyse. Yeah, I'd go straight to a chiropractor. Imagine that. My face and hands are numb. Yeah, you got what you wanted, didn't you? Babe.

Babe. Get up. You can follow the show online. Just search Couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead. Yes, and if you find us on Facebook, make sure you join our group, Endurant Idiots. You don't yet know the answer to the entry question, unfortunately.

You're going to have to keep listening for that if you're not already in it. So I can do a lot of Facebook Lives as well. So that's where you can find us. It's a whole new world, Facebook Lives. It is. You know that people are four times more likely to watch a video if it's live as opposed to uploaded.

You sound like a Lifeline ad. People are four more likely to harm themselves after watching a documentary series. It's like weird facts like that. Why'd you have to take it there? That's all I could think of. You don't sound like a Lifeline ad at all. Then we have to give the Lifeline number now, don't we? Do we?

Jenna, quickly. Hurry up! Otherwise it's on you, Jenna. 13 11 14. 13 11 14. I thought you would have known, Jenna. You have to put it at the end of all of your news articles if it's on you, Jenna. 13, 11, 14. 13, 11, 14. Just in case you need it. I thought you would have known, Jenna. You have to put it at the end of all of your news articles if it's slightly dark.

I don't. I don't write dark articles. Amanda Keller tried the new Kellogg's crunchy nut and hated it. Here's the lifeline number. What sort of non-dark articles are you writing, Jenna? This panda has a new cub. Did you know that pandas fake their pregnancy? Fake it?

Yes, in order to get more food and comfort from humans. Well, there you go. That's manipulative as fuck. How the fuck does the panda then break it to them? I'm actually not pregnant. I don't know. Well, you haven't done your deep diving, have you? I'm sorry.

Some journalist you are. I haven't asked the panda. Find the answer before the end of the show. How does the panda- Reveal. Then reveal, I'm actually not pregnant. I was actually just hungry. Yeah.

Also, that's a one-trick pony sort of thing. Like, you don't fool the keepers that you're pregnant a second time. And she said it like every panda has done it at least once. Did you know that pandas- Well, that's what it says. All right. From one awkward moment to another. Brilliant, Jenna.

During a pseudo-pregnancy, hormonal changes and behaviours are identical to those of a true pregnancy, making it very difficult to determine if a giant panda is pregnant. Oh, so it's like an actual... That wasn't the question. No. At what point does the panda go, surprise? Yeah, it's like an actual... That wasn't the question. No. At what point does the panda go, surprise? Yeah, my question was, when do they give up? Yeah.

Well, they might still think that they are pregnant and then just forget about it. And the zookeeper or protector, whatever, is like... Protector? Are you implying that a Taronga zoo worker or something would just forget that the panda was pregnant in nine months' time? No. Just be like, what happened to that baby panda?

No. They'll think, oh, it must be a fake pregnancy again. Oh. Oh. Sheila, that fake pregnancy again. You got me again. Fucking hell. What riveting shit this was.

Moving on. It's like the Bear Grylls podcast. Horrendous. Anyway, like I said, from one awkward moment to another, I heard this in the news this week. You know Justin Trudeau, the Prime Minister of Canada? No, for some reason a reality contestant sprung to mum and he said that.

Did not know that that's who the Canadian Prime Minister was. Well, the funny thing is he's very attractive. I'll Google him. No, you keep talking. Oh, you Google Trudeau. He's handsome. I think he's only in his 40s. He's very young and he's liberal, which is great.

Oh, no, in America, that's bad. He's left-leaning. And he is very devilish and handsome. Not my type. No, but you can see how the public will love him. Anyway, Justin Trudeau was being asked about Donald Trump. Obviously, all the protests going on in the States, which I think we all think are great.

You know our stance on that. But obviously, his relationship with America is very, very tense and very sensitive. As it would be. Yeah. Well, he can't slander Trump, but he also can't support Trump. So the journalist phrased the question in an interesting way, and it took him a really, really, really long time to formulate an answer. I've got the audio.

Here it is. You've been reluctant to comment on the words and actions of the US president, but we do have Donald Trump now calling for military action against protesters. We saw protesters tear gas yesterday to make way for a presidential photo op. I'd like to ask you what you think about that. And if you don't want to comment, what message do you think you're sending national TV we all watch in horror and consternation what's going on in the United States.

What? We do all watch in horror of what goes on in the United States. Poor and constipation. What did he say? Poor bastard. I would hate to be in that position where no matter what you say, it gets reported on. And even when you say nothing, it gets reported on.

Well, I mean, that's better than when Tony Abbott stayed silent and was just nodding. Oh, my mean, that's better than when Tony Abbott stayed silent and was just nodding. Oh, my God, yeah. And didn't even respond. No, that's when, like, an Australian soldier was killed in Afghanistan and they were like, Tony, this has happened. And he said, well, shit happens. That was his response.

And then a journalist cornered him. I have the audio ready. I didn't even actually realise the context behind this. I do remember how awkward it was, though. Play it. How's that turning into a media circus? Well, tell me, what's the context? And if it's out of context, what is the context?

You're not saying anything, Tony. I've given you the response you deserved. That's not an answer. Yeah, see, the difference there was Justin, whatever, what was it? Trudeau. He was just wanting to be really careful with his words, whereas Tony's just too proud to admit he fucked up. Yeah, very true.

That's what that was. How embarrassing. Poor bastard. Anyway, you said you'd hate to be in that position, right? Hate to be asked and hate to have to fill that time. Is that where this is going? Well, I was just thinking, considering coughing for chicken can't happen now, it's extremely insensitive due to COVID.

I can't cough on the phone. I'll get reported to the National Health Hotline. Yeah, it was also causing you your own health issues. Yeah, I coughed up blood a couple of times. At one point you got dizzy, you nearly passed out. At one point it gave you back pain. It did. So I was like, yeah, I'm not going to make you do that segment anymore,

even though I loved it. Knocked out my T2. It really did. I do love a good prank call when someone else is doing it. Yeah, well, this time it's you doing it, and it's actually given me the inspiration for this. Hello, darkness, my old friend. Oh.

Yeah. Sound of silence. Yes. Simon and Garfunkel. I see what we did there. This is called The Sound of Silence. So I thought coughing fit chicken is all about filling the void with noise. Yeah, right.

Coughing. I have to do it, so I'm going to sit back, relax, and I want you to feel 30 seconds of silence. Oh, okay. So what, I just call them and say nothing? You call them, no, and you say hi, and then they will ask you, hi, what can I do for you? And after they ask you a question, you do not answer it.

Oh, okay. So you have to get there. Oh, okay, yeah, I can do that, yep. So you need to sort of go, Jenna, we've organised a business at random. Now, who is it? Give them a nice plug. It is. We did a random search. We did. Sorry. Well done

guys. I was worried about this surprise segment. I actually think this will be good. I think he's more confident. This is perfect. I don't have to say anything. For 30 seconds though. Okay. Are you going to time it? Yeah. Okay. Here it is. It is Lulu Hair Salon. Beautiful. She also does nails too, but Thursday to Sundays.

Alright, I'm going to call. You have to ask a question, i.e. do you do French tips? And she'll say yes. Can I book you in? And then hair salon beautiful she also does nails too but thursday to sundays um all right i'm gonna call you have to ask a question i.e do you do french tips and she'll say yes can i book you in and then once she's asked that question right so i chat for a bit and then once they ask me a question correct because it has to be you waiting 30 seconds to answer a question and then you have to answer that question after the 30 you've got to go yeah book me and i'll see you then okay yeah and let's just say if she's going to hang up, because I'm worried she'll hang up, right, you can use maybe two to three filler words in the middle

to keep the 30 seconds going. What do you mean? Like you can go, if she goes, you still there? You can go, yep. Oh, okay, all right. No more than three words. No more than three words. No more.

So you can go. So like, yeah, I'm here. Yep. I'm ringing this Lulu. See if we can get it. I'm turning. I'm ringing Lulu. There's Lulu. See if we can get her. I'm turning our mics off. Lulu's here.

Salon Bethany speaking. Oh, hi. Are you guys open Saturday? Yes, we are. Oh, I was hoping to get a, I'm new to the area. I was hoping to get a trim done. Would I be able to book in an appointment? When would you like? On Saturday?

Did you want to come in on Saturday? Let me think. So we've got in the morning, we can do you at 8.30, otherwise the afternoon is available. Otherwise, the afternoon is available. Is there anyone in particular you wanted to book in with? Hello? Sorry, I'm here.

I've got a client waiting, so if you'd like to make an appointment, what time would you like? Oh, yeah, I'll call you back. Sorry, I'll think about it. Okay, no worries. Bye. Oh, you got it right. No, you made it.

You did it. Did I? You made it. Oh, my God. You made 30 seconds. I was like, if she's got a client waiting, that's just cruel. Oh, the poor thing had one of those humidifier cribs on her head. I nailed that. I nailed that. You did. Oh, the poor thing had one of those humidifier cribs on her head. I nailed that. I nailed that.

Oh my god. Wow. Silence is really quite powerful when you think about it. That was very impactful. That was a very tense 30 seconds. It felt like a day to me. I was like, come on Churi, you've got to be fucking with me here. Do you think that I came into

this with too much confidence? You wanted me to be nervous and be like, oh, oh, this is so frightening. Like I was all the other times you've made me do things. Yeah, a little bit, to be honest. I'm actually baffled at your confidence. Well, it's silent. It's easy. Even Jenna could do it.

Good idea. No, I'm scared. That's what we want. Can I just say, Jenna, I've always said that I'm deathly afraid of being put on the spot. And I like to know what's happening on the show. Yeah. Rather than have you guys throw's happening on the show. Yeah. Rather than have you guys throw me in the deep end. But that was very easy.

Yeah. I wanted to see if he could sink or swim. If I could drive a boat through the ocean, he was brilliant. Yeah, look at me. I'm scared. You'll be fine. Go on, Jenna. You can do anything.

I'm going to find a random business. Do you know what? I feel like in many ways, sound of silence. Is that what it's called? Yeah, sound of silence. Sound of silence. Okay. That could be more of a challenge for you because what? I feel like in many ways, sound of silence. Is that what it's called? Yeah, sound of silence. Sound of silence. Okay. That could be more of a challenge for you because you have to feel silence.

You're such a talker. True. Maybe I was manifesting my greatest fears in you. How good's Shosh? Oh, I can't stand it. What are we going to make her do? Who should we call? A nail salon would be ironic, wouldn't it?

Or a vet. They've got dying horses to tend to and they've got some bitch waiting for 30 seconds. No, no, no. Too much of an animal lover for that, no. Me too. I love animals. I would never think of animal cruelty. Something in Canberra.

I'm zooming in on the map. What should we do? Why Canberra? I'm going to search dentistry. No, don't do health professionals. That's a bit weird. Yeah, true. They're very busy.

Who's someone useless? Just kidding. Let's call it Carpet Court. No one's buying a carpet in the middle of a global pandemic. Can you find that place that's on Victoria Road in Des Moines that's like, rugs, and they're always having a sale? Rugs, Victoria Road. It's like a running joke in the inner west

that that place is never not having a sale. Kind of like EB Games. Huge rug sale. Rug, Sydney. They of like EB Games. Huge rug sale. Rug, Sydney. They close at 6.30pm. Brilliant. Hello, darkness, my old friend. All right, Jenna, you will be, sound of silencing,

Rug, Sydney on Victoria Road. They're a rug wholesaler. They've been on sale since 1864. You've got to fill 30 seconds. And you've got to get a question out of them. Do you have Persian? We do. Are you interested?

Don't give her tips. Sorry. I feel bad for her. I was thrown in the deep end, so should she. Look at me treading water, Jenna. It's great. Here we go, Jenna. Good luck.

Good afternoon, Rugged if you're South speaking. Hi, is this the rug place? Yes, it is. I was just wondering what your most popular rug is. Uh-huh. You're after something like modern or traditional? How about that? Yeah. something like modern or traditional? Hello? Yeah.

So what sort of style you after? Traditional? Yes, traditional. We got the Isfahan collection and then the Julian and everything. They're very popular. You've done it, Jenna! Are they still here?

You have to hang up the phone. Sorry, I forgot to hang up. Oh, shit. You could have spoken, Jenna! Hang on, I don't think she did do it. She did! She made 30 seconds. Yeah, but you said that you're allowed one bridging phase around three words.

She answered the question without 30-second silence. She said traditional. That wasn't stringing them along. That. She answered the question without 30 second silence. She said traditional. That wasn't stringing them along. That was just answering the question. Oh, Jenna, you're going to have to do it again. No, I'm not doing it again. No, I think she's the loser. I'm the winner. I'm happy with this result. We're ending the show. Thanks for listening, guys. You failed. Sorry, Jenna. You had every

chance in the world. You didn't win, Jenna. Thanks for listening, guys. We'll catch you back next Monday. It's one game all. We'll catch you back next Monday. It's one game all of a sudden. It's cocky. Don't forget, every Sunday we're going live on Instagram or Facebook, one or the other.

Yeah, we're yet to decide. We get more traction on Facebook, but then the fan base really is there on Sunday nights on Instagram, aren't they? I don't know what you're basing that on. Well, we always get a solid turnout. We don't need to have this conversation in the show. No, very true. We can discuss it later.

Jenna, next week we might have to retry. I don't think so. Well done, Mitch. Thank you so much. Well done, Jenna. Well done. You didn't think that you were going to do it. But you did it. You didn't do it. I did do it. Did she do it, Mitch? Even I'm bored by my own show right now. Wrap it up. I did do it!

See you next week! Is it just me? don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app or follow on spotify welcome to add brief this is the secret segment on the end we like to finish the show and be like yep that's it But then we just keep talking aimlessly. A couple of people with ADD having a debrief. No focusing required.

Exactly right. And you don't have to focus either, really. You don't even have to buddy listen if you don't like. Yeah, do you know, can I tell you, I went home over the long weekend. And my auntie... Back to Bougainvillea. Yes, correct. Back in my where I grew up, my parents' property in the middle of nowhere. And my auntie. Bougainvillea. Back to Bougainvillea. Yes, correct. Back in my, where I grew up, my parents' property. Yeah.

In the middle of nowhere. And my auntie Trish was like, oh, yeah, the podcast is going well. I like it. I think you need to get rid of that ADD brief. I never make it to the end. And I was like, babe, that's, it's fine. That's why we do a farewell halfway through the show, pretty much. Three quarters, whatever.

Because we don't expect people to make it to the end. Like we know that some people just don't have what it takes to make it through AD debrief and that's why we farewell them early. We give you a fucking easy out. We close the show. We literally keep it a secret. We don't want people to listen. I expect, in my mind, by the end of AD debrief,

because we are making, and I can't stress this enough, no effort to be engaging or interesting at this point we just go rogue yeah i don't expect to keep people's attention like there should be five people by the end i reckon if that i actually had a friend i can't remember the life of me here because i would fucking name and shame them you trust trust and believe but they said i can i never get through ad debrief i just don't find it engaging. There you go. I always lose interest halfway through. That's fine. That's the point.

Jackie, that's who it was. Just came to me. I'm just turning it on. Oh, no. There we go. They've activated. Live tweeting is down. It's being repaired.

It'll be back up next week. The macro didn't fire into the cognition, and the technicalities have no longer connected to the hardwire and copper. Nice jargon. It's actually not working, which is a real shame. But they'll be back up next week. It's all good. That's my youth foods.

Brilliant. We've been toying. I probably should set up the phone. Don't you think I should set the phone number up? No. Maybe we should get rid of ADD. Brief Trisha's right. 889-9604-39204.

1-896-23. 892-06-439. There we go, guys. Keeps going. It's all good. Relax. And today, I'm very excited. We haven't told anyone.

There's been a live audience the whole time. Hello! Are you all social distancing out there? Sing again. I want you to sing again. Sing. I want you to sing. Oh, I wasn't singing.

I was speaking. You guys clearly weren't paying attention. Yeah, what the fuck, guys? I might be messed up, but I know what's up. Oh, they love it. Oh, what happened? They all just died. Yeah.

It's a shame, isn't it? All at the same time. Yeah, instantly. They all passed away. Truly a shocker. How was Bougainvillea, though? I saw your properties your properties looking nice and green yes it's starting to get green again i was flying my friend's drone above the property and i was like oh ian and jane the dams are full it's even overflowing in some areas there's puddles so i i think because obviously there's been a lot of news

in 2020 a lot lots of big world events taking everyone's attention. Everyone just kind of forgot about the drought. But basically they've had a decent amount of rain where my parents live in the central west. But the problem is Ian, my father, had not sown the crops yet. So all the water is not exactly unhelpful like the dams are full the sheep have water it's green it's pretty yeah but it's more ideal for the rain to come after he's sown the crop so that it'll grow it and then we get more money from it so

he's sown the crop so now is when we need the bloody rain and we're not getting any i don't know i don't i don't keep tabs on it can't he just hose it with the water that you've got? No. Don't laugh at me. Do you realise how much water is required to cover 1,200 acres? With the demand that it requires? A little hose. I did

not say a little hose. Jenna, can you google how much a farming irrigation system costs? Because some of them do. Some farmers really rich, like fancy farmers. I don't even know if it's worth the investment, but they get irrigation. It's basically a giant

fucking sprinkler that just drives around the paddock and kind of uses bore water from under the ground to water it. Is bore water water that's from the earth? Yeah, I don't know. It's like if you dig deep enough you find some water. You can get a centre. We like to go next door and borrow water from Joe and Terry's bore the earth? Yeah, I don't know. It's like if you dig deep enough, you find some water. You can get a centre... We like to go next door and borrow water from Joe and Terry's ball. Right, yeah.

You can get a centre pivot irrigator, Australian made, for $50,000. Fuck me dead. Oh, my God. And then how much water does it use, Jenna? And then you have to operate the thing. Yeah, yeah, true. Does your brother live... He lives at home in the property?

No. No, he lives in parks nearby. Does he? On his own? He has a house, mate. Oh, my God, I love that. Do you want to know how much he lives at home in the property? No. No, he lives in parks nearby. Does he? On his own? He has a house, mate. Oh my god, I love that. Do you want to know how much he pays a week in rent? Don't even. Including electricity and utilities and all that. Because Hayden and I are on the house hunt now, go for it. Tell me. What sort of price range are you guys looking at in Sydney?

For a one bedroom place? We do want to, in case my two close friends ever want to come and stay. Who are they? I'm gesturing to the two of you. You couldn't see my hands. They're swollen. $620 to $660 is our budget a week. We're halving it.

Right. So that still ends up being, I'm no good at maths, $300 and something per week. $330 each a week. Fuck. And then that's not including bills. Not including bills, Wi-Fi. So you'd get internet, everything on top of that. Also, we've never moved out together.

We have no furniture. We have to buy everything from scratch. Oh my God. So there'd be a couple grand in that. Also, we've never moved out together. We have no furniture. We have to buy everything from scratch. Oh, my God. So there'll be a couple grand in that too. And groceries for me, Jesus Christ. My three buddy greyhound dogs. So with that in mind, would you like to know how much my brother pays a week in rent and utilities, build, everything? Go for it.

$80. A week? Yeah. 80? And he's on like a builder's wage not an apprentice anymore he's he's loaded is he really yeah what a little shit and is it a nice place or no it's just parks it's like it's not exactly a mansion but it's like i'd live there it's fine can you see the dish no that's like 20 minutes out of town on the highway but yeah it's it's a nice place it's like

two or three bedrooms massive backyard wow he lives highway. But yeah, it's a nice place. It's like two or three bedrooms, massive backyard. Wow. And he lives there with his friend. And it's like, great, I dropped in for a cup of tea on my way home. Oh, that's nice. He would never fucking cross the street to see me, but I'll drop in. I thought, I was looking at that drone footage and I thought maybe he was there, but no, it wasn't him. No, no, no.

Local cowboy. Yeah. Runs the IGA. Also the mayor. No, how's this? The Bogengate pub, one of the only things that is like,

actually the only thing really in the town, apparently when they closed for COVID, almost a blessing in disguise because the day after they closed, the roof collapsed. Oh my God. So thank fuck there were no patrons inside. But also, not good.

The pub's not there anymore, really. They're fighting with the owner over roof repairs, all this stuff. And then Target is closing a bunch of stores, including the one in Forbes. So Jane's just like, why bother? Why am I here? If there's no booze or Target country, why am I here? Do you think that she'd move to Sydney? I think she'd move closer to where her grandchildren live in Newcastle.

Yeah. Newcastle's basically rural. They've got a Henny Penny. Yeah. It's a good mix between rural and city, isn't it? Yeah. When I stayed at your sister's house, I thought I was in the fucking middle of nowhere. I know.

I'm only an hour out of Sydney. I'm like, where am I? The air is so clear. No, I was like, that was a two or three hour drive. You're in the Shire. That's hardly metropolitan. Oh, I know. It's a world of its own. The Shire a horrific world at that the poor shire i went like i had a lot of people in the shire go you're not going to those bloody protests are you really everyone what the black lives matter protest yes fuck yeah no horrific absolutely

horrific anyway that's the shire for you it's a beautiful place to live we have people who listen who live in the shire it's funny you always say these deeply awful that's the Shire for you. It's a beautiful place to live. We have people who listen who live in the Shire. It's funny. You always say these deeply awful things about the Shire and then you still defend it. No. Yeah, yeah. Basically, I got bashed to death when I came out,

but it's a beautiful place. Love the trees. No, because I do think it's got a great sense of community and it is a beautiful place to live, literally. Yeah, because you're white. Okay, I haven't finished my point and I understand my privilege coming from with this. I'm just roasting you, but yes, you're white okay i haven't finished my point and i understand my privilege coming from with this i'm just roasting you but yes i'm you're aware of your privilege but that place sounds

fucked yeah the it's it's like if you're saying get out by uh yeah it's very scary you should watch get out it's brilliant if you want to watch a movie to educate yourself um in the current times watch get out that's all you need to know it's so scary oh my god it's horrific but a great film great film. Great film. Very good film. I'll add it to my list. It's good, eh? We did add our charities

that we'd all donated to on Instagram and we put it on Facebook. Yes, we did. God, there was a lot. There was a lot. We were like, oh, what have you guys donated to?

I sent a couple links, you sent a couple, you sent a couple, and then we were like, shit, we've got a lot of bloody links between us. I'm going to get it up now because I donated to an extra one

that I thought was very important. Jenny, you donated to a lot of individual ones too, right? Yes. Yeah, me too. People's cases. Yeah. Me too. You inspired that.

Isn't it crazy though? I kind of feel, same as COVID. COVID was like everyone was talking about it and then it sort of died off and everyone was sort of just whispers. And now I feel like that's the same with this movement. But like I was reading the whole, you know, the Martin Luther King movements in the 60s and the civil rights. Jenna remembers it well. Jenna was there.

Of course she was. Jenna was there when he was shot. Awful. That lasted for, like, 600 days. That went for a year and a half, all the protests and the looting. And the change did not come in a week. So I'm worried now that's going to sort of die off. Our generation will have a quick bloody fix

and I just don't think that's going to happen. So I'm worried that the whole movement is going to die off. Well, I was literally just saying that everyone's forgotten about climate change, really. Yeah. Because that was all the talk with the bushfires in December, January. Yeah. So I don't think this will die off, so to speak.

I hope not. Because we've already spoken about it. I think a lot of minds have changed. The fact that Little Britain's been ripped off airs. There's things that used to be appropriate are no longer, which is good. And cops. Oh, I saw that. It was a reboot of cops, right?

So like the reality show, Mitch, following the Miami Police Department around. What, it got ripped? It's been axed. Yeah. You know, bad boys, bad boys. Sounds shit. Just called cops. Yeah, it's it's been axed yeah you know bad boys bad sounds shit just called cops yeah it's just cops it it's been cancelled after 31 years because they probably yeah people filming the police brutality let's be real oh but they found out that this podcast revealed that the police were able to edit the material. Really?

They could always paint themselves in a positive light. That's like when you watch the Kardashians and they're like, executive producer, Kris Jenner. I'm like, you can't, nothing is real if she's the executive producer. Literally nothing is real on that show. And you can tell that they're trying so hard to have things interesting. Like, Kourtney rocks up, she's like,

today me and Scott are playing a prank on my mom I'm gonna go in disguise as Kris Jenner and go piss in a bush and have an organize a paparazzi to take photos and then we're gonna have our agent call mom and she's gonna freak out and then Kris Jenner's like what do you

mean I never peed in a bush tell TMZ I'm not commenting those aren't me and it's like you can tell that some producer who is burnt out yeah thought of that and chloe's like yeah all right i'll do it but they're not actually having fun or enjoying themselves at all that show is so soulless now when you watch the earlier seasons compared to now oh my god i got a hey you subscription the other day and i was watching the original episode and then all of a sudden Bruce comes out of nowhere and I forget that Bruce was Bruce. I know.

I'm like, fucking, he's a real dad. Not that he's not, but he was just real daddy. The stereotype of an American dad is Bruce Jenner. Kylie was nine and strip teasing on a stripper pole at Kim's house and, Kim, Kylie, get her off that.

I'm like, oh my god, he's fully transitioned now. Did you ever watch Caitlyn Jenner's reality show, I Am Kate? I did, I did. Poor bitch. I think the first episode was okay, but the rest of it was just. When it was documenting her Vanity Fair article and when she had the confrontation with Chris, I loved all that. Also, you watch that executive producer, Kris Jenner.

Like you just go. Yes. She executive produced all of it. Do know ryan seacrest discovered that family yeah i always see his name in the credits isn't that great do you actually watch it no i i've i went through a period a few weeks ago where i was just like i'm gonna numb my brain with something and it ended up being that show yeah it really is a good brain number and i've just been bouncing around like whenever a friend comes over we'll watch one of their random spin-offs. Like, Courtney and Kim take Miami. And I'm like, God, look at them carrying on. Now they just, like, they are struggling to even maintain an interesting conversation at the dinner table.

They used to do things. They did. I watched an episode where Kim met Cher, and it was so awkward. Really? She's like, hi, Cher. Yeah, her and her friends flew to Vegas for the weekend to go see her residency show and they organized to meet Cher backstage and it was so awkward like Cher you could tell that she had no idea who they were and she'd just been briefed by her manager being like

babe it's a great fandom to tap into the Kardashians great exposure and she's like fine and she's like I'm your biggest fan she goes oh you're like my little sister. I love you. Come here, Kim. Like it was the most forced and awkward fucking interaction I've ever seen. And I was like, this show is lit. May as well just be called Keeping Up With The Integration. It was so bad.

Like how much did shares people pay? How much did Vegas tourism people pay? Like it was just, oh. Yeah, giant walking ad. It is a lot. Also, you have to have a pretty exciting life to have a spin-off about something you do. I know.

Mitch goes to Westfield. That'd be my spin-off. No, Mitch takes Westfield. Mitch takes Westfield. Mitch goes to LA again. In and out. In and out. The one thing I do like about that show is they're always eating

those fuck-off big salads, the obnoxiously large salads in a tub, and they're from the same restaurant in Calabasas. And Hayden and I, when we went in, because we were in and out, we were in LA in December, we were living with a friend in a suburb right next to Calabasas. So we went to that salad place. The number one item on the menu is the Kim. You can get the Chloe. You can get the Kendall.

Oh my God. And you can get their orders. And you just order them and it's exactly what they have. And it's always like 80% lettuce, one slice of ham and a pine nut. And like with no dressing, it's awful, but it's like their place. And it's just, it was such a cool experience. I'm trying to think, I don't think I've ever purchased something because a Kardashian was tied to it.

Like I've watched them on Hey You, which I pay a subscription for, I suppose. But I'm like, I've never like gone and bought, you know, Pepsi because one of them was in an ad. Like I don't really care about them that much. No, I bought the salad and my little sister Rachel is obsessed with Kylie Skin. She has everything. All the Kylie Skin shit. All the makeup. Apparently for the makeup types, it's quite good.

Apparently so. But, you know, that's my one TikTok that I've done. It's got like almost a million views and it's on the Kylie Skin skin so really it's a craze i didn't say that yeah well no one else did really i thought you said it was nearly at a million views oh yeah but for you that's just nothing that's hogwash yeah let me see this shit what are you talking about can i show you something go to tikt go to my tiktok and my most recent one um if at this point anyone's thinking yeah i don't i'm not gonna make it to the end of A to D Bye

Oh yeah also you're not going to get the fucking code Because we haven't told you yet They already know I'm going to have to We should start doing other farewells during A to D People definitely won't make it past this Yeah we should start saying goodbyes Goodbye David listening in South Australia

So when you say nearly at a million views, do you mean 230,000? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's not really nearly, but I'm sure. Yeah, but your other one is at 713. Yeah, it is. Yeah, it is. It's good for me, considering I don't try, and this is all recycled content. This one, though, is my 20th birthday.

That one's so funny. It's from my little sister. She bought a car. Go to the audio. Some girl has duetted it, and it makes no fucking sense. What? Look. Ready? That one's so funny. She bought a car. Go to the audio. Some girl has duetted it and it makes no fucking sense. Look. Ready?

It's her 20th birthday. She bought herself a brand new car. She's only 20. That is weird. Why? I don't know. I only found out the other day how to find out who's been using your sound on TikTok. It's very weird. I've had quite a few people lip sync me and it's like them telling my story like you like i've told a story about something

that happened to me and they just lip-sync it and i'm like how is that entertaining because it didn't happen to you yeah i find the whole tiktok phenomenon weird how do how are things put into the main like domain i don't understand that like on the for you page i should say i would just say that it they you know they figure out who it would be. They figure out based off what you've interacted with, what you also like to be, what you might enjoy. Because I don't necessarily get served things that are going viral. Sometimes I get something and it's got like one like,

and I'm like, okay. Like why is it giving this to me? And then I watch the content and I'm like, oh, TikTok knows that I love a cheeky bitch. Yeah, right. I get a lot of gay content. Yeah, me too. I don why is it giving this to me? And then I watch the content and I'm like, oh, TikTok knows that I love a cheeky bitch. Yeah, right. I get a lot of gay content. Yeah, me too. I don't like it.

Just little twinks being like, you know, this is what I'm into. Shut the fuck up. Mitch, I'm looking at your nan video sound thing. Oh, yeah. What's this cat doing? Oh, yeah. It's a cat with a McFlurry cup in its head. Yeah, see, I don't understand that when people lip sync it, but it's not relevant to what's happening.

That's a fucking Persian cat. What's the caption? Corona tings, hashtag Oz. I hate when people say Corona tings, talkback tings. You know, it's stupid. That's our segment. No, you came up with it. It's definitely making fun of people who use the word tings, though.

Like, it's not meant to be. Yeah, very true. Actually embracing that word. It's a horrific word. Anyway, we have a caller on the line. They've got a question for Jenna. Hey, Harry. I was just wondering what the audition process was like.

Oh, what the audition process was like to get on this podcast, Jenna. What did they call me? They said, hey, baby. They said, hey, baby. Hey, sweetie. There actually wasn't an audition process. You weren't vetted at all. That's a massive error on our part in hindsight

Oh definitely I don't know why you play those grabs of your fake callers Because then you out yourself as not actually being live They're not fake callers I use them when I have an interview that I can't get people I can't get calls for Because I'll sometimes do interviews at 4pm You know what I mean?

Why can't you get a call at that time? Because I'm not live. I can't go call me now if you want to ask this person. Pop it on Twitter and bloody DM them. Yeah, I have done that. In advance. There'd be so many fans depending on the artist you're talking to. I have done that. I actually have a Zoom call with Ellie Goulding on Monday. What do you reckon I should do with her?

I asked her I told her to watch Kath and Kim last time we spoke. Should I ask her if she's watched it? Go on. Do you reckon she has? Yeah, sure. I don't know. No Should I ask her if she's watched it? Go on. Do you reckon she has? Yeah, sure. I don't know. No.

I don't reckon she's watched it. She'll pretend. Oh, I loved it. I absolutely loved it. That Kath and Kim. It was so good. Yeah. That's my Ellie Goldie.

No, I've got that. That's your other show. You can keep that separate. Just like me, I never bring up my other shows, do I? Schnitty Committee, go subscribe and listen, clowns. Christ. I saw you go live on your Schnitty Committee. We're painting and drinking.

Groundbreaking. Yeah, and raise money for Black Lives Matter charities. You can do it for your podcast weekly rather than biannually. What? Nothing. What? Nothing. Nothing. Nothing at all.

It was a pleasure. Should we head out and see you guys next week? What are you laughing at? Jenna, what is going on? Nothing. Just try. I want you to try and say some of these before we go. To end the show.

These are the sexy, dirty talk words for Mitch. these before we go. To end the show. These are the sexy, dirty talk words for Mitch. No, I can't. These are so fucked. No, they're not. See, I like to think that these are things I would never say, but like I said earlier, I don't know what comes out of my

mouth in those scenarios, because I definitely can be vocal. I just don't want to know. Come on, say something. Am I supposed to be trying to sound sexy with it? No, just say them how you think you would say them. I feel like all of these things, I would sound really aggressive no matter how I say it. Yeah.

Shut the fuck up. Now get on your knees. Taste me. You wouldn't be like the one who's telling what to do, would you? You told me to read it. I know, I know. But that wouldn't be, you wouldn't say that, would you? In your mind.

No, I don't think I would ask someone to taste me. That's just, that's vile. Something a salivate should get rid of. That's cruel. That's horrific. It's like scratching sniff stickers. Try me. Anyway. Try another one. Don stickers. Try me. Anyway.

Try another one. Don't just give us one sample. Pull my hair and slap me. No, I wouldn't say it like that. No, you wouldn't. Say it like you'd say it. It's hard to get into that state of mind when I'm not actually having that happen. Would you like me to help?

No. What does that even mean? I don't know. I could get a video up for you. I could. Would you like me to get one up? Sure, let me get one up. See, I think this is a safe space because it's ADD, and most people should have tuned out by now.

Even I would have tuned out. Like, I was so bored halfway through that. Here we go. Oh, God. Oh, God. Bye, Cathy from Wollongong. Bye, Cathy from Wollongong. See you, Cathy from Wollongong. What are you going to do?

We just lost David from Wingerball. This could be used against me, a bit like your offensive statements that I cut out. I don't know if I want to do this. I don't know if I want to talk dirty with porn playing in the background. You can cut it out. I'm not going to do it on the work computer. I'm doing it on my iPhone, for God's sake.

Okay, this is Ray Dexter. He seems nice. What's he doing? Or who? Oh! Oh! Oh, no, no, no, no! No!

Get it away! It's Rubble. Get it away! Just try it. Just say something. I'm going to play this audio in the background. No, no, get it away. It's a rubble. Get it away. Just say something. I'm going to play this audio in the background. No, no, no. I'm now turned off just by the spitting.

No, turn it off. Turn it off. That's also not my favourite thing in the world, just quietly. No, turn it off. Sorry. Turn it off. Sorry, I wasn't stopping. That's not your favourite thing?

God, no. Really? Mostly not a fan of having that done to me, actually. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. I don't want someone, you know, munching away. No, I know what you mean.

It's very confronting too, isn't it? Oh, it depends. It depends. It depends on the mood and where it is. This is not my favourite thing. No. It was on Sydney Harbour in the barracks. That's what I've done there once.

It was horrific. What? What? We should end the show. What's the barracks? Oh, no. It's paying respects to the elders past and present. Oh, turn the music off.

What's the barracks? There's like an old vintage thing in the rocks in Sydney. You know, Blues Point? It overlooks the harbour. Opera House? No. Anyway, so you were in public. Yeah.

It's got this little castle. It's like a little vintage settlement room that overlooks the harbour. Who gave a gob to who? Hayden. It doesn't narrow it down. To me. God. Yeah. It's pretty horrific. It does sound horrific. No offence. It doesn't narrow it down. To me. God. Yeah, it's pretty horrific.

It does sound horrific, no offence. That doesn't sound... No, it was great! It doesn't. I enjoyed it. All I'm saying is maybe you should try and get out a bit more. What? Get out a bit more.

Try it outside or... No! Different area. I've always thought that the element of being outside of the whole, oh, we're not supposed to be doing this. Yeah. Like, oh, I hope we don't get caught. That would be an extra thrill, but I've never done it.

No, we tried and then it was horrific because there were fishes down below. Being like, oh, we've got to give me some more bait, Stephen. And it was quite off-putting. Plus there was a P&O cruise ship going past and there was a lot of people looking. Yeah, I'd rather not be sucked off with the Ruby Princess nearby. That's no good. No, no, no, no, no. The whole carnival cruise ship was, you know.

I just want to be a little fuck doll. Oh, God. It's read off the paper, everyone. You know I got that. All right, let's get out of here. We just lost Craig, Darren and Judith, all from Victoria. They must be housemates. We'll see you next week. Back with another great show.

Better be great. I fucking hope so. You talk a big promise. There's a lot planned, everyone. Jenny, you going to be there? Yeah, I guess so. Yeah, okay. You have no choice.

She's going to skip Zumba. Rhonda will be so upset. Don't know who that is. I just assume it's someone in your class. Yeah. Nah. It's clearly a woman. Can we throw names at you when you tell us we've guessed someone in your class. Yeah. Nah. It's clearly a woman. Can we throw names at you and you tell us, yeah, when you tell us we've guessed someone

in your class. Just one person. Yep. Dot. No. Bev. No. Lee.

No. Trudy. No. Michelle. No. Kerry. Yes. Yep.

We did it! I knew there'd be a Kerry in your Noomba class. That was easier than I thought. All right, we're getting out of here. We'll see you next week. See you guys. Thanks for listening.