Is It Just Me? - #5: The Missing Budgie

Episode Date: October 20, 2019

Are male covers of female pop songs better than the original? (06:35)Can we pass a year 1 english test? (12:30)Surprising Jenna with her Big Brother application (16:17)The dare so screwed up we cancelled mid-segment (22:48)How to eavesdrop using Apple AirPods (27:58)Our "secret segment" ADDebrief (36:42)Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. This is it. This is a big one. This is for the girls. This one. Some things make more sense than others. Lindsay Lohan punched in the face after trying to take a boy away from a mother. You're a good little boy. I won't leave until I take you.

Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for. That's the line. I see it quite clearly. Get new glasses. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Cinder, one Mitch is clearly better than the other one. I couldn't agree more.

Now, here's Mitch Churley and Mitchell Coombs. Episode five. Oh, hello, Mitch. How are you? All right, hello, Mitch. How are you? Oh, right, straight into it. You are going to be so proud of me. Oh, hit me what? Well, you know how you're a bit of a fanboy of all things Apple products?

Yeah, I'm a bit of a nerd like that. Love my tech. I wouldn't call you a nerd. Apple's very mainstream. Right, well, I love my tech stuff. Got the new iPhone, got the new Apple Watch, Apple TV. Well, guess what? I've come into the new decade.

Can you believe? Oh, you haven't. Watch, Apple TV. Well, guess what? I've come into the new decade. Can you believe? Oh, you haven't. Guess what I got? What did you get? I got those headphones, the ones that don't have a cord on it. You know? All right, Grandma. You got AirPods?

Sure. Congratulations. Thank you. Do you have them with you? I do. Look. Show me. They're in that little.

Yeah. Looks like a Tic Tac container. There we go. Close it. Look at him go. Oh, one more time. Why? I just a Tic Tac container. There we go. Close it. Look at him go. Oh, one more time. Why? I just love the sound.

Go, go, go. Turn my mic up so it's in my ASMR-ish. All right, all right, all right. Here we go. Ready? Oh, that sounds great. Congratulations. I've got to say, I really did think that I would be more impressed by it.

Oh, you're not thrown. I did. One of the ways I justified it, like spending 300 bucks or so on a pair of headphones was that because whenever I go to the gym, I always find myself really distracted on my phone. And I thought if I had these AirPods, I could leave my

phone in my gym bag and be able to control my music with the headphones. Well, they probably won't connect. Because you know how they've got the touch control thing on the side? Yeah, you can talk to Siri too. I thought that you'd be able to adjust the volume on the music you're listening to with the AirPods. No, you can't. But the only way you can adjust the volume is by talking to Siri.

Yeah. So I'm like, imagine me in the gym like, hey Siri, turn it down. Oh, please. I've had phone calls. Hey Siri, turn it back up. No, I've had phone calls with you in the gym. You were so puffed. Hey Siri, hey Siri, turn the volume back up.

Exactly. That's how our phone calls always go. And so I was very upset. I really thought that you'd have more control with it. Literally, all you can do is skip the song. I thought that there was, if you did like, I've only had them for a few hours. Yeah. I thought if you did like a special combination of different gestures and things, it would do different things.

Like braille. I was like stroking it. I was basically finger bashing these headphones, being like, does it do anything else other than skip? Can't even pause it. No, you can't. Very disappointing. If you take one out, then it pauses it. That also pisses me off because sometimes I like

to listen to music with just one headphone in. Then you have to press play again on the iPhone. Then it will start just one. That's no good. That's so inconvenient. I can't believe I spent so much money on this shit. Yeah, there is actually a spy feature. I actually want to tell you about it inconvenient. It's very convoluted. I can't believe I spent so much money on this shit. Yeah, there is actually a spy feature. I actually want to tell you about it now. There's a super spy feature that I use all the time.

And it's even, I'm wanting to use it to help me get more money in the future, in like contract negotiations. This lets you hear what other people are saying about you in another room. Really? Yeah. Oh, okay. I'll tell you about it after you. Yeah, okay, sure.

Not on here. You can teach me about that later, okay? Hey, should we address the, I want to say elephant. That's offensive to her. You're. Not on the air. You can teach me about that later, okay? Hey, should we address the, I don't want to say elephant, that's offensive to her, but should we address the- You're the elephant in the room, make no mistake. What are we addressing, though? The gazelle in the room? She's very gazelle-like.

Oh, yes, producer Jenna's back. Hi, Jenna. Welcome back. Thank you. Hello, everybody. I'm so glad you could be bothered to join us. Excuse me? Jenna, while you were gone, we plotted something, just so you know.

We've got something coming up later on that you're going to hate. Yeah. I don't want to hear it. We've done something on your behalf. We're trying to get you out of your comfort zone. Actually, can you? Oh, no, you have not. No, genuinely, I wish you could see her face.

As soon as I said comfort zone, she goes, what? What? Can you take your headphones off for a second? First of all, I just want to say say I thought it was a present for me. No, it's not a good surprise. We've just been telling her that there's a surprise. Take your headphones off so I can tell everyone what it is. Oh, poor thing thought it was a present and she's pregnant too.

So, okay. I'll turn everything down. If you haven't heard the news, Big Brother's coming back to TV in 2020. So we've signed producer Jenna up. We've done an application for her to be on Big Brother. Yeah. So we've signed producer Jenna up. We've done an application for her to be on Big Brother. Yeah. And because Jenna is so shy and doesn't really like to be the centre of attention, I know that she's going to freak out.

The type of person Jenna is, she will hate this. I'm going to do a little time travel teaser right now, just editing what her reaction is after we've done it. So this is what you've got to look forward to. No! Mitchell, get the papers, please. Here we go. Now, Jenna.

Jenna, calm down. Jenna. We'll do that later on. Also, Mitch, I believe you're giving me a taste of my own medicine. I am. Well, look, normally we have our segment, You Gotta Hustle. So I've got to do something really embarrassing and weird to try and promote the show.

In order to get us new listens. Yeah, so it is You Gotta Hustle. It's back this time. You're in the spotlight. You Gotta Hustle, boy, and I'll sit back and I will enjoy it. And Jenna and promote the show. In order to get us new listens. Yeah. So it is, you've got to hustle. It's back this time. You're in the spotlight. You've got to hustle, boy, and I'll sit back and I will enjoy. And Jenna and I will laugh. Not me, Jenna. We sure will.

Jenna, I should also tell you, while you were gone, we've changed things majorly. Yeah, big changes. The way we do things around here are very different now. I'm not happy. And we did not get your approval. So last week, episode four, if you missed it, we were listening to the other shows that

are also called Is It Just Me? There's quite a few podcasts with the same name as us. Yeah, I reviewed all the competition, if you can call it that. Yeah, and one of them, do you remember his name? What was it? Yeah, oh, I don't actually, I don't want to get that. It was, I will say, it was the lowest rating, Is It Just Me? Yeah.

And one review, one star, and it just said terrible. And yet we've decided to take inspo from him. Jenna, no approval from you. We're taking a leaf at it. Jbrielle Paramal's book. There we go. Just found his name. Time.

Five seconds. And now it's time for me to fuck some shit up. How the fuck are you? Yeah, I'm fucking mad. So I thought I'd just turn the microphone on. I just got a couple things built up. There was no bells and whistles, no sound effects. It was very raw, unfiltered and amateur.

And we said, we should do more like that. Instead of us coming here and talking about what is it just means we've noticed from the week, we should come with voice memos that we recorded in the moment and play it to each other. So that's how we're doing it, Jenna. Yep, we're still starting the show the same way we do every week with our idjams. Let's jump in. You ready? Yeah, sure. I'll go first. This is my voice. Kick it off.

Is it just me, or... Gosh blimey, isn't it just the best? I mean, it could just be me. I mean, that's the whole point of the fucking show. Who knows if it is just me, but don't you just love watching male

covers of female pop songs on YouTube? It's currently 9.13pm in the evening and I'm on YouTube. I do this often. Just type in here, in YouTube, the song title and then just the words male cover and it'll bring it up. Let me just do it now. One second. Let's go.

Wildest dreams, Taylor Swift, male cover. Let me just fast forward a bit. Here we go. Oh, sounds great. Hit it. Can you stand it? It sounds great. Eli, L-I, oh, how do you say his last name?

Eli Lieber, like L-I-E-B. Not bad looking. I would put him on a plate and sop him up with a biscuit just quietly. There we go. What was that? So is it just me or are male song covers on YouTube really great to listen to? I do love it. I didn't even understand.

All I could hear was the keyboard. It sounded like a kitten was running over a whole bunch of cornflakes. That was the point. We're meant to be more amateur when we do this. That was awful. Why are we trying to copy this guy? Yeah, it is just you. I've never once done that in my life.

Here's one. It's Only Love Can Hurt Like This by Tom Vaughan. Oh, that's me. Sorry. Oh, my. Oh. Only love can hurt like this Only love can hurt like this You must have been a deadly kiss Yeah. I don't know why I love it.

It sounds like he's obviously had to slow down the bass line for copyright reasons, so it sounds like something out of Horton Hears a Who. Like, rum-bum-bum, blum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Listen, these are people just making song covers on YouTube. They're not supposed to be super profesh. This is working at Centrelink by day and then doing covers on YouTube by night. It's fun hearing other people's interpretation on the song that you know and love. I don't know why you wouldn't just stick to classics.

Well, because sometimes when you listen to the same song over and over and over and over again, it can be fun to listen to a different version. You know how sometimes the acoustic version is nice to listen to? Yeah, you're right. You know what? You opened my eyes to live performances. Yeah. One of Gaga's albums.

Is it Juliet or something? Joanne. Joanne, that one. I knew I had an auntie there. Joanne. She also had an album. Auntie Leanne. Step-auntie Karen. David's

girlfriend, Barbara. You introduced me to that album and I still listen to this day because it's so different live. Live versions of songs. And so this is an extension of that. Would you ever do it? Could you have a YouTube channel? Would you ever do male covers? I have to be able to sing. No, I'm not

going to be getting into that, no. Is it just me? You can follow the show online. Just search Couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead. I didn't mind that style of presenting our Is It Just Me's to each other. It definitely changed the pace. Because sometimes when you're in the heat of the moment, you

think of the Is It Just Me you want to cover, you kind of lose the passion when it comes to the day off. You're like, oh, actually, I'm not feeling the same way about this topic. So if you just whip out the phone memo and do it then and there, you're not going to forget. Yeah, you're not wrong. Mine was a bit different.

I think I took on a bit of, what was his name, Pablo Escobar, whoever the podcast guy is. No, what's his name again? Why do we keep forgetting? Oh, God, it was Justiero. J'Brielle Paramount. Okay, great. Which just sounds like a pack of cigarettes my dad would have smoked in the 80s. J'Brielle Paramount, I think.

Reds. Anyway, how did you go? Yeah, I'm ready to go. Here is my idjah. Is it just me, or... Is this even working? Fuck's up. Just in the car driving currently. The aircon!

Who turned the aircon on? Shut up, kids! Daddy's working! Do not touch the backseat aircon in the Tarago without my permission. Braxton, stop! Welcome back to episode 336 Or it could be 334, I don't even know who the fuck knows anymore Speaking of more, I went to the doctor

And they said I need more medication But I just didn't answer them because they're not my normal doctor, it was Judy Let's jump in to the show Is it... Fuck They're not my normal doctor. It was Judy. Let's jump in to the show. Is it... Fuck. Is it just me or... Hey! Stay in your lane!

Tell you what. I have to merge on this highway one more time. Hey! Is it just me or am I the only person who has zero idea what a simple noun, verb, adjective, etc. is? Just completely confused by it. That's me.

That's the podcast for this week. The air comes back on again, kids, for God's sake. So, definitely a character there. Yeah, I was going to say, that's not how, that's not what we agreed to. We weren't meant to be taking on a character. You just fabricated all these children and all this traffic. No, I was being J. Brielle. I was being him.

Oh, right. See, I didn't realise that's what we were doing. I was just being myself, but taking on a bit of inspiration of his style. No, I took on completely his way of life. That's my idiom, though. I don't... He didn't have kids in his podcast. I pictured them in the background, malnourished, probably chained up.

I think I don't understand basic nouns or adjectives. If someone were to say to me, just give me an adjective quickly, I wouldn't know what to do. And then you throw in pronouns and adverbs and it's a whole shit show, huh? I get pronouns because it's 2019, am I right? Oh, of course. Yeah, there we go. Yeah, but nouns and verbs, do you understand them?

Yeah, I happen to top English in my year level at school. The only thing is top. Okay, well, I was interested. So you definitely think you know them? Yes. Because what I've done is I've gone to kindyhub.com. You've gone to what? And what I've done is I've had to fake an account

and pretend that I'm a child educator. And I have got a simple year one level grammar, noun and verb test. Now, it's very simple. I'll pass. I'm fine. No, no, no, no, no. I'm going to give one to you and one to me. We're both going to fill it out now.

Okay. Jenna will need you to mark it. So should we bring Jenna in? Yeah, all right. Jenna, come on in quickly. I mean, quite her surprise, though. It's on the desk. Oh, yeah, of course.

All right. So, we can read it out loud. Use nouns and verbs to complete the sentences below. You'll use each word only once. The words are bake, eats, cake, made, pie, and cream. I like whipped. Blank. On my pumpkin pie.

Palsy. You're foul. Look, I said it. Sorry. Just a joke, everyone. A noun. Cream is a person, place or thing. Don't give me the answer.

Oh, right. I'm crossing them off as I go because otherwise I'll get confused. We need a noun there. Sure. That's easy. My sister, blank, dessert faster than I do. Oh, no. And they're looking for a verb. so it's something that she does.

A doing word. Oh, so a verb is a doing word. Yes. Right. Bludgeoning! This is actually quite easy. My mum's favourite is pumpkin and then a noun. Okay, you don't answer it because we want to get marked.

Although in year 12, I would pay people to give me the answers. I cheated in the HSC, can I say that? He's not having it. What do you mean? Test restrictions. What do answers. I cheated in the HSC. Can I say that? He's not having it. What do you mean? Test restrictions. What do you mean you cheated in the HSC? I wrote the answers and the dates that Adolf Hitler did. What he did.

No need to say it. On the inside of my rubber. Oh, that's not that bad. But still, the dates were there. I thought that they'd take the rubber, the outside cardboard thing on an eraser off you in the HSC. That's what they did at my school. Not in my time. God, no. You couldn't have plastic water bottles? Oh, you were school captain. I bet those

were your perks. You're like, oh, headmistress, we really should abolish this one rule. I feel strongly about it. Yeah, I got to do it in the common room on my own. Oh, I've made an error but I've corrected it. Leave it. No, I've corrected it. I'm allowed to correct my error before I've handed in the test, dickhead.

Okay, Jenna. I'm done. They've been handed in to producer Jenna. How do we know that she's any good at grammar or whatever? Her hair's always in a ponytail. She knows. You know what I mean? Okay.

What's happened to Jenna? One of you has failed. How? Is it me? Failed to you what? Read meant? Failed. You won. Read. Who? Who has failed?

One of you. What do you mean? Used the same word twice. Even though it explicitly said you'll use each word only once. Of course. Oh, no. One of you wrote cake again. And you've done it on four and two, so. Don't assume it was me. Who was it, Jenna? It was you. Oh, no. One of you wrote cake again. And you've done it on four and two, so.

Don't assume it was me. Who was it, Jenna? It was you. Of course it was you. I didn't even mean to do that. That wasn't even a test of your grammar or whatever, your ability to identify nouns and adjectives. That just, you can't count.

You're failing English and maths. Both bitches are very needy, so make sure you leave a review on your podcast app. Can't think of anything nice to say? Just hit five stars and let them know what's currently on your left. All right, Jenna. What is it, Ty? Good thing you're in here because it's time for your surprise.

It is. And when we said surprise, you assumed that it would be a good surprise. You were quite excited. But I'm sorry to say, I don't think you're going to enjoy what we've done. Yeah. I think, should we roll the music? I didn't know we had music.

Yeah, no, I've organised this. Yeah, all right. Jenna, please welcome your new life. Ring any bells? No, you haven't. Took a while? No. Jenna?

I'm not going on Big Brother. No. Mitchell, get the papers, please. Here we go. Now, Jenna. No. Jenna, calm down. Jenna.

Now, Jenna, I know that you're quite shy and you don't like to be the centre of attention and you don't like to be made vulnerable, but I just thought career-wise this could be great for you. Okay? So we've done an application. Oh, she's absolutely livid. Just think, Chrissy Swan, Sarah Marie. Fitzy. Bum Shake Girl

Ben Norris All these great names have come Tim Dormer Yeah there you go So there's a lot of questions I went in and answered them for you Mitch would you like to read them out? Yeah applications have opened Jenna

And you're in It's been submitted So I'll read the questions Mitch will read the answers we've done for you Are you okay? No Okay thank you for answering Let's start in. It's been submitted. So I'll read the questions. Mitch will read the answers we've done for you. Are you okay? No. Okay. Thank you for answering. Let's start. If you could invite three people to do it all over again.

Sorry, that was the worst sound effect I've ever heard. What do you mean? What the hell was that? That was the ad break music. Yeah, but it just cuts off and it's the scabbiest quality ever. Who will Australia choose? Rima or Ben? After this. Terrible.

Anyway. All right, here we go. Sorry, sorry, sorry. Do you want to do that before every question or no? No, absolutely not. I never want to hear it again. If you could invite three people, dead or alive, to dinner, who would they be and why?

Now, because I know you, I've written Brie Larson, my favourite actress. I may or may not pursue her romantically. Harold Holt, I'd ask him for tips on how to vanish forever. True. And the lead zebra out of Racing Stripes. I'd like to pat him. That was a good movie.

I did. If you could only choose one song to play every time you walked into a room for the rest of your life, what would it be and why? Now I've written the ketchup song because Spanglish is a beautiful language. Next question. Tell us something that is true that almost nobody agrees with you on. Breastfeeding shouldn't be allowed in public. Damn it! No! Jenna, that's a disgusting opinion.

That is disgusting! We have a lot of women with breasts that listen to this show and that is awful. And they love to feed in public, as it so happens. How would you convince someone to do something they didn't want to do? Threats. Can't argue with that. That's how you tend to operate.

What is your least favourite thing about humanity, Jenna? People that speak to me, is what I've written. If there was a movie produced about your life, who would play you and why? Bridie Carter from The Clouds Daughters because she's good with horses. Am I right? You're not wrong.

She's a great actress. She's a fantastic actress. What do you do for fun? Hold my breath as long as I can. See, I'm trying to position you as being a little bit dry and sarcastic, but also a little bit of a psychopath. Thus far, they're going to say, we need to get a police

check on this girl before we bring her into the house. What is your best and worst physical feature? My enormous nails. My goal is to be able to wind them up in a hose reel. They're not long! Jenna, they're about an inch. What habits about others irritate you? Firemen who put out fires.

It ruins all my fun. Fun fact, you know that meme with a little baby girl looking back, smiling at the camera with a house burning behind her? That's Jenna. That was me. That was Jenna's family home. Do you have any enemies? Who and why? This woman who works at Aldi, who scans the groceries too quick.

It's not good for my blood pressure level. Oh, Jenna. I find they scan too slow. Yeah. Oh, look, she's so relatable. I'd vote to save Jenna. But they scan so quickly. It's like they're pegging these items at my face.

Yeah, but it's quite therapeutic because you don't have to do anything. Oh no, you do. You have to do everything. You have to pack it. I leave it home. What are you thinking of? I've only bought one box of chocolate. That's the only time I've been out here. They've got great European chocolate. Okay, describe an event that changed your life. When Mel Rafter

died on Packed to the Rafters. I know you're not over that, Jenna. We talk about it all the time. I'm not over it. What do you do when someone ignores you? Put a curse on them. Jenna would have voodoo dolls for you. If I received this application and I was part of the casting, I'd go, she's off the chain.

She'd be good, though, for like a week three elimination. Yeah, for sure. Yeah, say some weird shit. You'd put her in there for the fact that she's different to the others, right? Yeah. Oh, yeah. You'd really stand out. But they might be afraid that she'd pick one of the locks with her nails.

Have you ever been owed money? What did you do about it? Bought a loaf of bread and let it go mouldy, then put it in their mailbox, slice by slice, over the space of a few weeks. That's creative. That's very creative. What sort of people don't you like in the house?

Fats. Okay. No, you did not. I did. I can't you like in the house? Fats. Okay. No, you did not. I did. I can't believe you're going to go into the house. You're going to shame fat people.

You're going to shame women with breasts. I'm not going. I put all the details in your name. No. But I put all the contact details in mine.

So if I get the call back, I'll let you know. Yeah. Also says, in the meantime, please take time to share your registration on Facebook, Twitter or simply send it to friends so they can register as well. We're not going on with you. Nah, you're on your own, bitch. As Helen Keller once said, this podcast is fucking dope.

You're listening to Is It Just Me? A podcast by a couple of bitches. You know, I'd watch her on that show. I really would. That or Antiques Roadshow should just be stellar. You know what I mean? I found this brooch. I actually think that'll be great promo for the show when you get on.

Positive thinking. No, please. No, no, Jenna, I'm turning your mic off. No, no. You see her, Jenna? Speaking of promo for the show. Yeah. She's wailing in the background.

Jenna, it's fine. Why? Jenna. Speaking of promo for the show. Yeah. She's wailing in the background. Jenna, it's fine. Jenna. Speaking of promo for the show, it's time for this. Come on, baby. You know you gotta hustle. Okay, the second time we're doing this segment, you gotta hustle. First time we did this, you threw me in the deep end. I did.

I made a dick of you, but you gotta hustle. You just gotta. You gotta hustle. I mean, look, I am into this segment to a certain degree, but I had poor little Dami Yim on the show a couple of weeks ago, and I walked into the interview here in the studio and I had a piece of paper, and I had a list of things to say, i.e., podcast! And the aim of that was to promote the show in unorthodox ways. Yeah.

But now you're putting it back on me. Well, look, easy, unconventional ways. Radio love a billboard. They love a social plug. We can't afford all that. We can't do any of that. We've got to be creative. Exactly. I've been working with producer Jenna.

We've been working hard. Very hard. We've been up all night. All night. We? Want to make a difference. Jenna, this isn't bloody Greenpeace. You sound like Greta Thunberg. Jenna and I have been working hard and what we have is we have a number and we're going to dial the number right as the number's

ringing i'm going to pass you a document oh i was really worried you're going to make me do a prank call is that what this is i've got a piece of paper in hand i'm going to dial the number and as it's ringing i'm going to hand you the piece of paper and you will know i'm no good at improv who you're ringing but all this is like thank god you're here you have to make it up essentially yeah exactly right it's everything I hate in one segment. Well, that's where Ed Cavill got his start. So you could have a cancelled Today FM show one day too. Look, I know that it's a running joke that Mitchell makes everyone else do prank calls

and he doesn't like doing it himself. Look, it's not going to be that bad, is it? Because I have an actual social anxiety disorder here. And I'm really, really... All you need to do is get in the name of the podcast where they can listen. Kind of what it's about but seamlessly.

We don't just want you calling this poor person and spilling it out. It's got to be seamlessly integrated. So I'm going to dial it up. Yeah, right. Rip off the band-aid.

Sorry, sorry, sorry. Let me get the number out. This could be good for me anyway. My therapist has been trying to make me do exposure therapy for a long time. What's exposure? Expose yourself?

No. Exposure therapy is where you literally, on purpose, go out of your way to do things that make you anxious so that over time you build up a resistance so you're not anxious anymore. Okay, give me the piece of paper. No. No. No. Hang up.

Hang up. Hang up. No, seriously, hang up. Hang up. Why? I'm not kidding. Hang up. Hello? I hung up, but why? hang up, hang up. No, seriously, hang up, hang up. Why? I'm not kidding. Hang up. Hello?

I hung up, but why? You had to do it. That is so fucked up what you were just going to make me do. What? It's fine. Jenna. Are you across this, Jenna? I am.

That wasn't my first choice. It was. You chose this. No, I did not. I cannot believe you let this happen. This is wrong. What I've handed Mitchell is a piece of paper. It's a screenshot of a gum tree listing with the title Missing Budgie.

Someone's lost their budgie. Yeah, and I just want you to call and go, hey, I was. There's a picture of a bird here and they've lost their budgie. Read the description. Missing Australian budgie sugar cane escaped the 10th of September. Oh, God, it's mid-October. That's no good. No. As the owner was of September. Oh, God. It's mid-October. That's no good. No.

As the owner was in hospital. Oh, no. Are you serious? Jenna, that's on you. You guys are fucked up. No, no, no. All you needed to do was call and go, hi, I was at a park. I saw a couple of birds.

I was listening to this podcast. And that's all you had to do. In that moment, their hopes have just raised. They clearly care. I know that it means nothing to you. But they clearly care enough about this lost bird. I'm getting really upset. They care enough about this lost bird to put up a gum triad

with a feral photo of them. Yeah, but we're just hoping. If I'm going to get their hopes up and make them think that I could have found it and it's all just a joke. That is so wrong. You know, she could have already found it. Yeah, I actually think I heard it. I actually think I did, so. I heard that too. Yeah. I actually think I heard it. I actually think I did, so.

I heard that too. Yeah. I'll ring her back. This is no, don't you dare. I'm serious. No, we can't do this segment. Look into that budgie's eyes. I should have printed the other ones out. The other ones are great. There was a six foot mannequin. Well, you can get back to me next week with those because I'm not doing this. Okay, well, we just end the segment?

We have nothing else to do? Just end it. I'm not doing it, so yeah. Just end it? Just end. Yeah. I mean, I'm not doing it, so, yeah. Thanks for listening anyway, guys. Jenna, do we even have anything last minute we can add in to fill? Yeah, Jenna.

Yeah, Jenna, this is your fault. No, we don't. Oh, God. I guess we're just wrapping. That's fine. Yeah, we can just end it. Actually, no, here's something we can do. Remember in the opener, you mentioned to me about these new AirPod things of mine.

Yeah, you bought them today. You mentioned, what was the hack that you said you could do? And I said, oh, you can tell me about that later. Oh, the secret spy kids thing. Yeah, what's that? Oh, yeah, good. We'll do it. You can do that. Yeah, yeah, let's do that.

That's fine. That's more right up my alley. Jenna, how dare you? I am with you actually now. How can you think that this is okay? Oh, don't ride in my coattails. Excuse me, you were the one who picked it. You know you've got a problem when I'm the one that has the biggest heart on this show. You guys are fucked.

We're beautiful people. Look, okay, what we can do is I reckon everyone listening right now, just pretend that that mess never happened. It feels weird just launching into a new segment now like nothing happened, but hit a sound effect thing and we'll just carry on like nothing happened, okay? Okay, but we normally end on with like Gregorius laughter. So on three, we'll just do Gregorius. We can do some fake laughter and then go into the segment, all right?

On three. One, two, three. Listen to Is It Just Me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. All right, Mitch, you mentioned earlier in the show that you've got an AirPods hack that's going to help me catch people out who are bitching about me. Yeah, Circus Spy Kids. 2000s?

Early 2000s? It is a hack that I once used to be able to do. Remember the magazines that came through in primary school? Did you ever get them? I don't know if you got them in the country. I don't know if you got mail. But there were magazines and they had all this tech stuff or girly stuff on My Little Pony and you ticked a box of what you wanted and they'd send it to you in like three, four

weeks time. Oh, yes. Remember that? I had this listening device and I used to love it. And it had a little radar sensor. You could listen to your sisters or your brothers. But now you can do it with your iPhone. Well, I feel like I'm a bit stuck in the 2000s,

because as I mentioned, I only got these AirPods today. Yeah. And I barely knew how to use them. I didn't know that there was anything you could do with them. So anything you can teach me, I'd appreciate. How can we put it to the test? Well, show me how to do it. Okay didn't know that there was anything you could do with them. So anything you can teach me, I'd appreciate. How can we put it to the test? Well, show me how to do it. Okay, pass your phone.

Okay, but that's not showing me how to do it. That's just doing it yourself. Oh, okay, I'll come over. Something happens around this side. Okay, so. Go to, there we go. What's Grindr? Just an app I saw.

Go to... So just give me your phone. You search. We're going into settings and we're pressing search. You're typing in control center. Customize controls. I'm assuming the AirPods are connected. Yes, they're connected.

I don't trust them. Then you go down. There's a whole list of things you can add. You could add a QR code reader or a magnifier. We don't need all that. What are we is tap um add on hearing so you hit here hearing there's a little blue ear yeah i think it's designed for the um audio impaired hearing impaired but we're using it for right okay so we've gone into settings we've added hearing to the control center correct then what you do go to your already confused grinder's got a nice look

it's like a little bat leave my green sorry sorry then you swipe down from the top, and all of a sudden, there's a little hidden ear. Yeah, okay. See, so I'll go back to my desk now, now that you know that's there. And put your ear pods in your ears. Yep. Make sure they're connected. Oh, I can't promise anything. No, no, that's okay.

I don't know what I'm doing here. Pop me in. Take them out of the pill case. I'm back in. Oh, God, I'm going to lose these ones, like, very soon. Sooner rather than later. They're so small. Ooh. It just made that noise in my ear. Oh, ooh, they're going to lose these ones, like, very soon. Sooner rather than later. They're so small. Oh, I just made that noise in my ear.

Oh, they're connected. They're connected. Okay. We're here. All right. Now, what you need to do is swipe down from the top. You've got the ear open. Tap the ear and hit enable sound.

There is no enable sound. Show me. Turn it off. Turn it around. It just says Mitchell's AirPods. Listen live. Off and hit listen live. On. Right. Okay. Get your terminology right. Sorry. I don't know. Don't hear from me. Oh it off. Turn it around. It just says, Mitchell's AirPods. Listen live. Off and hit listen live. On.

Right. Okay. Get your terminology right. Sorry. I'm out. Don't know. Don't hear from me. Okay.

So now you hear every... It's going to be quite confusing for you. It's like Inception. Yeah. There's a slight delay. Hold on. I'm going to... Nobody likes you.

No, that's your inner thoughts. That's not the AirPods. It's talking to the phone. Can you hear my AirPod echoing? It's working. Yeah. Because this is... So there's a microphone on my phone.

Correct. Playing it into your AirPods. I'll turn every other microphone off. So in theory, I would leave my phone in a room and be like, I'm going to the bathroom. And then I'd be able to eavesdrop. And then I would know that if people are left behind are bitching about me. So I would hear them being like, God, it's annoying.

God, I wish I could just go home. Yeah, it's also handy if you ever do mock role play of an airplane situation. You can pretend that you're a flight hostess. This airplane is really, really messing with me. Going back to the normal ones. So why don't we just test it as well? Test it live in the field. You've got the, we need to be in here.

Yeah, well. We may as well use. Oh, Jenna. Okay, so. All right. The whimpering starts. So we're in an office. We're in the studio here.

There's a couple people here at this time. Why don't you give. Here's my phone, Jenna. Sorry, I'm speaking really slowly because the. Feedback. I've got my own voice echoing in my head and it's very confusing. I think you should go into little Chris. He does audio for my night show I don't know him that's even better this made our opener very talented we've gotten lots of compliments about we've got pretty pat and um I think calm Chris is a nice name it's quite calm which is good because you

can go in there and you need a natural reason and you have to bitch about us so that this is true to life yeah just walk in and be like sorry sorry, I needed a moment. Talk into their phone. We'll see if it works. Can you hear her, Mitch? Yeah. Great. Alright. Go in. Go. Jenna, just go in. Put one of your AirPods up to the microphone. Give it a test, Jenna.

Into the bottom. There we go. Okay. Oh, she's coming back, Jenna. She's coming back. Jenna. Jenna. She's coming back. He's doing what? Jenna, so are we. He's listening to something.

She can't hear us. She can't hear us. Jenna can't hear us. I'm really scared. Oh, for God's sake. Maybe we shouldn't. How am I going to know whether it works or not? Go in.

And she's going in. Can you hear her? Hi. I just needed a moment away from them. Oh, they're just so annoying. I can't stand them. How long have you been here for? Since 5.30.

Yep. Yep. He's talking about you. He's always annoying. He's talking about you. He's always annoying. He always is. Oh. I wasn't annoyed at Chris. Well, I better get back to them.

Yeah. No. No, keep digging. She cut your wrist. Chris called you always annoying. See ya. I hate everything. All right, turn this down.

Here we go. She's back in. Jenna, for clarity, can I take these out now? Yeah, out of your hole, yeah. Well, firstly, that worked. Yeah, well done, me. I overheard everything you said. I overheard everything Chris said.

And it's pretty easy to hide a phone in a room so they won't notice. Or they'll just think that it's locked on the coffee table or something. Yeah, did you not have that right next to your mouth? Yeah, I did. So I'm really happy. You can't spy on people with it. But there's one thing I need to know, because you were in that room, you would have heard him clear.

Did he say that I'm annoying all the time or annoyed all the time? You heard it. Go get him. Go get him. Go get him. Bring him in. Bring you little bastard. Bring him around to that side, because there's no microphone there.

Jenna, I feel bad. We have to reveal it to him, Jenna. You were going to make me call someone with a missing pet. It was his idea. Oh, you blame Jenna. It was Jenna's idea. I don't plan it. She's the producer.

Jenna doesn't have ideas. I quit. No, you don't. Okay, I'm going to get him now. Thank you, please. Goodness me. I didn't want to do that budgie thing, by the way. You did so.

Chris is very quiet. She's stuck her head in. You bring him around too. He'll share a mic the way. You did so. Chris is very quiet. She's stuck her head in. You bring him around too. He'll share a mic with Jenna. Hi, Chris. Now, get your ass in here, Christopher. Talk on Jackie's mic. Firstly, you'd be glad to know, Chris,

we've gotten a lot of compliments on our opener. Someone asked us to send just the opener to them so they could listen to it in their spare time. Okay, awesome. You've got to talk into the microphone, Christopher. Secondly, when we sent Jenna in there just then, we were testing out this hack that Mitch knows, that I'm only just learning with these new earpods,

that you can connect the earpods to your iPhone and then eavesdrop on other people. So Jenna was in there with my phone. It took me about five minutes to get in there. Did you say that I was annoyed or annoying the other day? I need to know. You were annoyed the other day. Oh, okay.

That makes a lot more sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was wondering if you annoyed the other day. Oh, okay. That makes a lot more sense. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I was wondering if you annoyed the other day. Oh, when was I annoyed? Because I'm perpetually annoyed. It's fine. You do give off a sort of, you know, aura of annoyed. Very annoyed.

Yeah. Not a bad thing. No, pretty bad. So you like stormed out of the studio the other day. I didn't know if you were finishing up or if you were. I probably just needed a piss. You walk with the same determination no matter where you're going. When he walks down the aisle, everyone will be like,

oh, my God, he's left him. No, no, he's very happy. Well, there we go. I just wanted to confirm that I'm not annoying. I knew. Thank you, Chris. I just wanted to make it clear to everyone. Did you think something was up with Jenna?

Oh, well, you were holding your phone a bit. All right, well, this has been a weird show, everyone. Thanks so much for listening. This is not where I saw the show going, but whatever. It's been fun. All part of the fun. The worst show for me. First Big Brother, then getting me in. Oh, Jenna, you like it.

Your career's going to blow up. Thanks for listening, everyone. We'll catch up again next week. Will do. For Ep 6, follow us at coupleofmitches. Correct. Got it right. And also don't forget to subscribe to the podcast.

That's exactly right. And leave us a review. Write a review, in fact. Yeah, please do. We're up to five star. We did get one three and one four. So they're progressively getting worse. Who the fuck were they?

I don't know. Chris? Dead to me. Are you allowed to swear? Try it. Fuck. What do you think is going to happen? No, you're not allowed to swear.

Chris, we just got dumped. Chris, that's... Of Grinda. Anyway, well, it's been a great day. Let's head out. See you. See you, guys. See you next time.

Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. Psst. Welcome to AD Debris. Here we go. This is our secret segment that we have after the show's finished. And the goal is that no one will listen. But if you're here, feel free to hang out.

It's a judgment-free zone, though. Correct. And I'm just going to hold on. I know you told me not to. Just turned on live tweets. They're on. Oh, another one straight off the bat. Oh, Chris, you've joined Twitter.

Congratulations. Thank you. Chris is so confused because he thought the show was finished. Yeah, yeah. He clearly hasn't listened to our podcast. He doesn't know what ADD Brief is. But we're here and people can live tweet like they're doing right now. People are tweeting.

This is like an unscripted segment at the end. It's called ADD Brief because neither of us can focus. Loved it. We just go on tangents. Yeah, we just keep going. As you can see, he goes rogue with the sound effects over there. I don't. I don't.

It's not good content, but whatever. It's ADD brief. It doesn't need to be. We could try and get Chris set up with someone on the show. We could try and get him someone. Oh, he's looking right at Princess Charming Jenner over here. Oh, God. Mitch, I'll turn.

Mitch, Mitch, just don't talk for the next couple of minutes. We don't need to. I'm fine. Mitch, just don't talk for the next couple of minutes. We don't need to. I'm fine. Talk to each other. Yeah, you know, just a bit. He said me not to talk so that you guys can have some alone time.

Pretend we're not here. Hi. Hi. I hate... Yeah, I hate you guys. Oh, it's safe. If you're busy, Chris, it's fine. You go back to work.

You go, Chris. Thanks, Chris. Thanks, Chris. I'm sorry that I seemed annoyed, but that's just me. Yeah, that's his attitude. Oh, someone says, more Chris. Oh, that was Chris, because he just joined Twitter. Are they definitely recording?

100%, yeah. Everything's recording, even that song. Well, there you go. He's not your type. That was not... I'd be pretty upset about that, Jenna. Instead of even trying to chat you up, trying to get some skirt, he just goes, can I go back to work?

He'd rather be in that soundproof booth alone. I agree with you there. There you go. I do agree. I'll tell you what. Yeah, tell me what. It's just been a wild show. It's been a very fun show.

I am feeling, you know how I feel really good. I'll tell you why. I kicked into Radio Boat and I felt it. He was good, by the way. He was very nice. That opener was great. First time I met him, so it's all good. Hold on.

Walking in there was the first time you'd met him? Yep. Oh, shit. That's even better. He's very sweet. He said that I can go in there any time I time you'd met him? Yep. Oh, shit, that's even better. He's very sweet. He said that I can go in there any time I need to vent, so that's nice. We heard it, Jenna. We were listening.

Yeah, don't forget that. Everything. You played it very good. Well done. See, I don't trust people who use AirPods, and now I have every reason not to trust them as well. Yeah, well, it's a sign of wealth. I already didn't trust them.

It's a sign of wealth, and apparently on Twitter being gay, apparently gays love them. Why? I don't know. I wouldn't know. Anyway, sorry, what were you going to say? You said it's a great day. It's a great day. I'm feeling good because I am drinking water, lemon water.

And I know now I sound like, is it just me? The one with that, the girl who does the wellness, is it just me podcast. Oh, yeah. Jenny, you weren't here, but she does a wellness show um called is it just me it's very deep rooted taking a very different angle to what we have yeah this is one of her tips actually still have it i think this is one of her tips from um the previous weeks uh no it's been destroyed what do you mean it's been destroyed who destroyed it hold on talk to yourself i know it sounds bananas.

Whatever. Who cares if it does? I know. But it's one incredibly effective way to figure out exactly what's going on on the inside of you. So I'm going to take a leaf out of her book. Give her a five-star rating, please. And I'm drinking lemon water, partly because my partner's mum claims that I have made my partner put on a whole bunch of weight. Because I'm a bigger person.

Are you, darling? Well, I mean, what's the nickname you've given me? Madam Fat. Well, you can see why I have that complex. I'm drinking more water with lemon because today she said, or the other day, about a week ago, she was like, Hayden's put on so much weight since he's been with you. And I was like, shit, he has.

Actually, he hasn't. I love the backtracking there. Because I just realised that he could listen to this. He has. Actually, he hasn't. I love the backtracking there. Because I just realised that he could listen to this. He has. No, he hasn't. Babe, you look fine. He actually hasn't, but that's what the current talk of the house is. What about you?

Have you retained, have you gained or just been steady with your ways? I'm a constant yo-yo. I'm like AJ Rochester. You know what I mean? I'm good, I'm bad. I'm good, I'm bad, then I'm dead. You're like Samantha Armitage. She fluctuates. There's no drones near my backyard.

No, but she's always said that she fluctuates, and I like her for that reason. I fluctuate all the time. But no, I see where you're coming from. I'm not in a relationship per se, but I'm seeing someone at the moment. And it's so easy just to be like, oh, let's just get menu log, whatever.

All the time. And I finish work at midnight. I get home by 12.30, and I eat dinner at 8 o'clock. So I'm starving by that time, like 1 a.m. I should be going to sleep, but my body's like, hold on, you get home by 12.30 and I'm at dinner at 8 o'clock. So I'm like starving by that time, like 1am. I should be going to sleep. My body's like, hold on, you should have another meal. So I eat stuff and eat shit.

So that's why I've gained weight, the only reason. I don't think I've got a thyroid. So what do you two do together? What do you mean? I meant eating. Also, that could be totally, totally. That's exercise for me. Let's be real.

What do you guys... There's no way I can say this without it sounding dirty, so I'm just going to get the dirty thing out of the way. Apart from fucking, what do you two do when you're hanging out? The head of Twitter, he says, please don't swear on the podcast. What do we do? We eat. We watch a lot of Netflix and TV.

A lot of Uber Eats. A lot of snacks. We love snacks. It's our little thing. We're like, let's get snacks. And we get a lot of snacks and TV a lot of Uber Eats a lot of snacks we love snacks it's our little thing we're like let's get snacks and we get a lot of snacks that's not just your thing everyone snacks idiot

let's do a quick snap poll who snacks? results are in 80% of people you're right Mitch no one can live tweet because the show's not live my snack's done

in the microwave it was a pop star oh another one add two there's two microwaves right next to each other it's impossible to have a conversation with him you're not wrong. My snack's done in the microwave. It was a pop-up. Oh, another one. I had two. There's two microwaves right next to each other. It's impossible to have a conversation with him. You're not wrong. But feel free to call in anytime on 13 999 664 802.

1 1 4 3 9 6. Does Hayden think he's put on weight? How does he feel about it? He complains all the time. He's like, no, my clothes fit. I'm like, that's weird. They must have shrunk. Okay.

Are you going to take ownership of this? No, it's completely my of my clothes fit i'm like that's weird they must have shrunk okay are you gonna take ownership of this no it's completely my it's completely my fault i mean i own it i because i'm a big eater and i i'm one of those people that and i've always said this once you're fat you people don't notice they're just like you're always fat you know what i mean but if you're skinny and you put on weight it's like they've gained weight but i'm always constantly in the ballpark of god he's big you big. You know what I mean? So no one notices it on me. So I can gain 10 kilos and you'd be like, a little bit of an extra chin. But he'll gain three and you notice it.

So he's noticed it. It's true. I wasn't exactly small as a teenager. I was chubby as, hey. And it's like once you're not in the chubby category anymore, you're suddenly like in a different. Yeah. Well, that's how I thought about it,

which I now realize is a little bit toxic and whatever yeah because i like having a little bit of squish pudge me too i'm not shaming i don't want anyone like i i'm one of those people that like you look at them with clothes on and it's like oh yeah you're probably a little bit like you look lean yes but one if you actually physically grabbed my fat it's like oh my god you're still squishy there's a lot even though even though you're small you're still like really you know you know what i mean so i'm just but but i like that in other people you said to me in the past you like dad bods yeah i do jenna do you like dad bods or just bods that look like adult bods i love i don't mind yeah I just look at people like, you know, Zac Efron and go, boring. Same. Yeah.

You know who I love? Jennifer Aniston. Beautiful. Okay. Cool. That's her tweeting me now. She said, I joined Instagram. We get it!

Yeah, God, she joined Instagram. But did you see that everyone is saying her first ever photo, it looks like her and the cast of Friends are snorting up? Yeah, but it was just a reflection. No, it's her phone case. I did a bit of investigating. Who has a phone case that looks like they've got lines of cocaine in it? It's too hard. Literally, there's this photo on Jennifer Aniston's Instagram, because she wasn't on

Instagram until like last week. She joined, broke records, she got to like five million followers in the first day or something. And the first photo she posted was her hanging out with the other

cast members of Friends and on her phone case there's these little white lines that look like powder and we're like oh they're going to snort up after this selfie

and also very close to not Matt LeBlanc who's the other one you're telling the story the one who's got the drug addiction Matthew Perry? Matt Perry.

Very close to his nose. It is. Look at the photo right now. He's leaning in and it is so close to his nose. And I'm like, that's unfortunate because he's the one with the allegations. And so is she claiming that it's a phone case? No comment has been made. Where did you get that shit from, Jenna?

I'll get the receipt. Please do, God. We've got to have them by next episode. I'm hoping by the end of this one. I'm not that interested. I'm not going to wait a fucking week. The Spice Girls did this too. Remember when they announced their reunion,

there was a photo in the background. Actually, I think it looked a lot more like cocaine. Can you get that one up too? Jenna, please. Here we go. I found it. Oh, I see. His nose is right there. Two hearts

saying love is love. It's a great Kylie Minogue song, Two Hearts. Oh, look at her. God bless. That's why I love Jen. She's just so down to earth and very funny. You know what I mean? Yeah. Have you met? No. No, i haven't definitely haven't just a reminder phone lines open 1-800-669-4432 9-646-882 does it change every time every day because um we don't pay for it you're like it's

like your thing where you can make up suburb names on the spot that sound convincing. You can make up hotlines. Coonablander Bush. Why do I find it so funny? Hold on, let me Google it. Oh, there's the area code for Coonablander Bush. Hold on, we're calling into Coonablander Bush. We're live in Coonablander Bush.

Let's see what's happening. Maybe a local fair or a council or a children's show. No, you're confused. The fair is happening in the neighbouring town of? Brenda Baraldine. And remember, we have five seconds, and this is one of my favourite country towns. I got the horses in the back.

Commercial music, get rid of it. Yeah, five seconds. No, I don't even want to risk it. Can we play that snap game where I play five seconds, but you've got to justify it? I agree. Mitch, no one knows what the snap game is because I crop it out every time because I'm not risking it really every I'm not kidding what is this episode five five yeah every 80 debrief we do Mitch tries to make us do this

game because there's really strict copyright laws around commercial music on podcasts apparently you're not allowed to play more than five seconds unless it's in the context of like that's what the show's for like you're doing a music update more than five seconds unless it's in the context of like that's what the show is for. Like you're doing a music update show. Like, oh, this song's at number one on the charts. Here it is. And you're only allowed to play five seconds. So you're telling me every time I've done this,

which is probably three at this point, you've cut it and no one's ever heard it. No one's ever heard it because it's a shit game. Either you win or you get sued. Like that's not a mistake. It's funny. So my game is you can only play five seconds of a song, but you have to justifiably be playing it.

So I play five seconds. No, we're not doing it. Please don't. I'm just setting the setup. I'm not going to do it. And the person after, i.e. Mitch or Jenna, has to justify why we're playing it. I'm not going to do it.

It's all good. You're not doing it. I won't do it. Would you cut it if I did it? Yes. Okay. So don't do it. Okay.

Don't. Don't. Okay. Oh, no. it yes okay so don't do it okay don't don't okay oh no that's diamonds by rihanna the game's over sorry i it's fine it's out it's out don't it's out it's out okay we're crossing to twisselton and uh going live in Twisselton in three, two, one. What's happening? I'll just Google. They've got their annual Halloween festival and that might be it. Oh, no. It's a local dog killing a child.

That's morbid. Just killed the dog. So you have pets, Mitch, because you don't have much empathy towards animals, I've noticed. I have a beautiful little cavoodle named Hamish, named after Hamish and Andy. And when I met Hamish, Blake, I told him. And he said, well, get a cat and name it Andy. Because back in episode two or three, one or the other, you did this bit where you went rogue on the sound effects again

and you killed several animals who were the Bogengate mares. That was a bit of that. You decided that my hometown is run by livestock and you killed cows using the gun sound effects. Very weird. And then today you try to make me call this missing budgie's owner. And now you've just shot a dog again.

I had a dog mauling a child and then you shot the dog. But they're not real. I'm not mental. It's because I've got this soundboard here with 30 sound effects and I only have that set amount. So for the rest of the history... How about you delete all the animals and the guns and then that won't be your go-to. Okay, well, I'll do this then.

This is what you want. Jenna, are you able to concede now that this was not okay, this budgie thing? It was never okay. It was a test. Because he's blaming you. Oh, that's funny. I'm not blaming you.

But I've changed the sound effect. No dogs anymore. No, I want to know about this. Whose idea was the budgie thing? It was not mine. I have other ones. Okay, good. We have other ones that we haven't prepped.

That's why we couldn't do it. Oh, you're changing it to we now? The budgie one, it wasn't... I actually didn't go out of my way to choose the budgie one. I went on to Gumtree and that came up. So I thought, we'll do that. We only just printed a whole bunch and that was the first one. So I'm so sorry.

I really hope she finds her budgie. Me too, genuinely. So I've gotten rid of the dog sound effect and replaced it. You don't want me shooting dogs? What did you replace it with? Oh, no. Well, it's what you wanted. Is it bad that when I think about which one makes me sad,

I'm killing a dog or killing it? The answer seems quite obvious. That's awful. That goes for a minute and three seconds. Let's play it and skip to 30 and see what's happening. God, who needs that much baby crying sound? It's happy now. It's awful.

It's very exciting to be in episode five. Why is that? Just because I'm surprised we made it. And I think we have a massive fan base now. No, we've done pretty well, I've got to say. Was that your grinder? No, it's not my grinder. That sounds like it.

I actually had a, this is a reminder to go and pick up my pants that are being altered. They're being hemmed at the shopping centre across the road. Is that when they take the bottom off? Yeah. I haven't had to do that since I was in year eight. Really? Yeah. I don't know why these pants were just fucking long.

No, I had to do it. I was a size 38 waist by year six, so the legs were really long on all of them because they assume you're a 45-year-old man, but you're actually a child with a big waist and short legs. What waist? Oh, I think I was a 36 in my year six form. I remember it vividly. The six and the six. I was 36 was a 30. I was a 36 in my year six form. I remember it vividly. The six and the six.

I was 36 at one point. I'm a 38 now. I was. Sometimes I'm a 40. I had to go to Johnny Big once. And now they always call me and they're like, welcome to Johnny Big Man.

Mitch, how are you? I'm like, good. What's Johnny Big? It's like 3XL to 10XL. Oh, okay. They've got a new model as well. I just got the PR release from them. How convenient.

Did you actually? Yes. Who is it? Jason Owen, former X Factor star. Oh, one of your pals, Mitch. Near Dubbo. That's where he's from. Yeah, that's what I mean.

One of my pals. He's a country boy. I don't know everyone in the country. He's Johnny Big. Large size clothing. Yeah. Give him a plug. I'm not giving him a plug. I just want to look into this.

These models aren't even that fat. Don't say the F word. What? Fat. I didn't say fag. What? Hold on. Rewind this.

I didn't say that. It was very breathy, so it sounded like you said. Why would I call them? That's ridiculous. Oh, that's Johnny Big official. So anyway, you go to Johnny Big. I go to Johnny Big, and I go there once, and one of them goes, I recognize your voice.

And I go, oh, here we go. Kiss fans. No, is it just me fans, right? It's just me. No, they heard me on Kiss. You the cash cock? No. And then we were talking Kiss fans. No, is it just me fans, right? It's just me. No, they heard me on Kiss. You the cash cock? No. And then we were talking, talking, talking, and she's like,

we could put you up as an ambassador. It's genuine. And I was like, oh, I don't think. I don't know. I don't exactly think that's my brand. And then she's like, we'll send you. Don't you even. You're literally in the store and then saying to their face,

this place is not on brand for me. Yeah, but I shop at McDonald's a lot. I don't exactly want to be the face of it. Why not? They would have so much cash. They would have a lot of cash because there's a lot of people. I said fat with a T there. And I just didn't want to do it.

I wanted it to be aligned with who I am. Anyway, I've been back maybe one month. Sorry, I don't want to get bogged down on this, but I don't understand how it's not aligned with who you are. It's a shop for people that need large clothing. Yeah, but I don't want to be synonymous with that. You know what I mean? We're talking about it now.

Jenna, can you crop this audio and send it to, what is it called again? Johnny Big. Johnny Big, and they'll send us some free shit. Of course. I'll send it to Lowe's as well. Oh, I love Lowe's. I would happily be the face of Lowe's. At Lowe's.

It's good. You know that my Mardi Gras shorts were from Lowe's as well. Oh, I love Lowe's. I would happily be the face of Lowe's. At Lowe's, it's good. You know that my Mardi Gras shorts were from Lowe's. They were like kids' school shorts. Really? Yeah. They showed off all your legs. Yeah, they were meant to be really small and tight, and nothing in the men's section anywhere was any good. They're all denim and cargo and straight and foul.

What did you wear? I can't remember. Really short, tight black shorts. And I cut the legs to make them even shorter. And there was that frayed look. And yeah, they're actually school kids shorts from bloody Lowe's. I also had to cut my Mardi Gras outfit too because I was there for work because I was dressed as a sequined chicken.

And the suit, no joke, the suit weighed 18 kilos. No lie. For anyone who doesn't know what the cash cock is, it's the Kiss FM mascot, essentially. And Mitch, that's how we got his start. He's now on air at Kiss, but he's still the mascot. I'm still the cash cock. You haven't shed that duty.

No. Well, I was on air. I started four years ago as cash cock, and four years to date has passed. I did cash cock last week. It just doesn't end. Anyway, the cash cock suits is a rooster outfit, and it goes down to my ankles and to my wrists.

So they sequined everything, and it was 18 kilos. And I get there. Oh, I remember that. And they weren't small sequins. No. They were like CDs. They were like LP vinyls. Yes.

And they were thick, and they were reflective. Who's that fish, the one, the rainbow fish, that had the scale and felt? Rainbow fish. Rainbow. Like his friends did? That's the rainbow fish. Who's that fish, the one, the rainbow fish that had the scale and felt out of place? Rainbow fish. Rainbow. Like his friends would do. That's the rainbow fish. Who's the rainbow fish?

It's the rainbow fish. I'm not saying, who's Obama? Oh, who's that Shrek? No, rainbow fish. The answer's in the question. Anyway, there were massive scales. And I get there and I go, I can't do this because it was really hot too. And everyone's breathing on each other.

God knows what they've all got. And I had to cut the arms off and the legs off. So it was like a one-piece swimsuit made out of feathers. Again with the animal cruelty. You cut the chicken's arms and legs off. Don't connect it there. I think we should end this on a lovely note. I would never do that.

It's been a pleasure. It's been fun. Next week, I don't really know what we've got on. We'll talk off the air. Yeah. Good idea. We are launching the Is It Just Me secret sound. What's this?

One more time. One more time. Can we get that one more time? We sure can. Wrong one. Back next week. Alright, that wraps up another ADD Brief where we just go AWOL.

That was, I would say that was the weirdest, that one. Should we cut it? No, I don't know. Apart from when you breach copyright laws, I don't edit ADD Briefs. Are you actually going to cut them? I have done, every time. People are going to love in a year's time when they go, we've never heard this segment, and they're going to want to run it. They're going to want to air it. They're going to love in a year's time when they go,

we've never heard this segment, and they're going to want to run it. They're going to want to air it. They're going to want to hear it, is what I should say. No, they're not. I spoke to Jess Malboy today, and she really wanted to hear it. Yeah, but it's breaching laws. No one watches the news and sees a murder and goes, I want to do that.

There's nothing tempting about that segment. That's not what I said. It's too risky. That's not what I said. Don't forget to leave a review review Five stars if you're feeling lucky Yeah but you should write one as well Actually Because you can put the five stars without commenting But we like to read them

They're very cute Okay if you've gotten this far Why don't you leave us a review Subscribe Jenna I'll tell you what Mocking me Why don't you write a review And write what you think

I should replace the crying sound effect with And next week we'll have it I'll have it That's on me You don't have write a review and write what you think I should replace the crying sound effect with and next week we'll have it. I'll have it. That's on me. You don't have to prepare that. I'll do it. So if you want it to be a frog ribbiting, that's another animal. Shit.

Open up a bottle or fire crackling or a horn going off. Write a review. I will read them and I will have it and that will be the new weekly sound effect. We'll do it every week. Oh, please don't. The sound effects in this segment are the bane of my life. Really? Because I'm pretty sure they're keeping us afloat.

And that's actually our lawyer. She says, guys, you've made, oh, you've made nothing. It's a zero. We've made nothing. Thanks for tweeting that, Ari. She actually said you're at a loss. Oh, I didn't think you could quit off a Twitter, but she's just done that. Sorry, she's just done that.

Oh, that's another one. That's my lean cuisine. Sorry. Why is that funny? Oh, shit, I'd be a great Johnny Big Ambassador, wouldn't I? Yeah, you would. Lean cuisine. See you next week.

Thank you for listening once again, guys. We'll catch you soon. See you. Bye-bye. Bye. Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app.