Is It Just Me? - #54: Feeling Unhinged

Episode Date: February 8, 2021

Season 3 is here and mercury is in retrograde. What could POSSIBLY go wrong?!In this episode:'Wherever you get your podcasts' 2.0 (07:24)Songs that fuck you off (10:24)Reading out this week's podcast reviews (20:41)A merch update (23:12) TikTok School: Drive-by advice (24:30)Jenna decides... Do we take this job offer? (32:54)Our "secret segment" ADDebrief (41:54) Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. Television legend Kerri-Ann Kennelly fell several meters from a trapeze while performing in the musical Pippet. Some things make more sense than others. Ring Pike's Nurseries. What nursery? Pike's. P-Y-K-E-S. P-Y-A. K as in kill.

P-Y-A. K as in kill. P-Y-E. K! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Why is being alive so expensive? I'm not even having a good time. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches.

What about me? Don't forget Chin-On. Who? Now, here's Mitch Churley and Mitchell Coombs. New season, new opener. Hello, we're back. Groundskeeper Jenna is back as well, our third wheel. Hi, I'm back. Hello, Jenna.

Good to have you. Look at Rosie and the Chiefs. Yay. Hello, boys and girls. I feel like we've come back from two weeks ago. Good morning, Mr. Churley. Now, that's more being really loud. Oh, yeah. Good morning, Mr. Cheery. No, it's... No, that's more being really loud.

Oh, yeah. That would be more me to you. What about the teach you had that was really cool and hung out with you on the playground? What do you guys do on the weekend? You'd call them by their first name, like Mrs. Jenna. I never had that. No, I never did either. Oh, yeah.

No, we had a Miss Rachel because she was cool. Was she like fresh out of uni thing with like a brunette ponytail? And wore all her keys on a lanyard. Oh, yeah. You'd hear her coming and be like, shikin, shikin, shikin. No, it's Miss Rachel. Miss Rachel, David's dating Sam. She'd know all the guys.

You would have been the teacher's pet. I just know. I know I would. You'd be best friends with Miss Rachel. I've been captain twice. We're back, season three. I know. How's everyone feeling about being back?

I feel good. Yeah. I'm feeling a's everyone feeling about being back? I feel good. Yeah. I'm feeling a little bit weird about it, actually. Why? Well, remember last week we were like, yeah, we're ready. We're feeling rested. We could come back. But I didn't realise Mercury would be in retrograde.

Oh. Oh. Yeah. And, like, I'm not one of those people that's big on, you know, astrology and all that crap. Astrology. It just can't be a coincidence that every time Mercury's in retrograde, I just become that little bit more unhinged.

Yeah. And I knew something was up. On the Saturday it started, I was like, I feel different today. Something's different. Really? And then I came to work and someone mentioned it and I was like, are you serious? Again, I just, there's something, I just get a little bit more easily agitated. Yeah.

And I get irrationally mad about things. Like, you know that chick Cyrel of Married at First Sight? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. I hate her as of Saturday. I had no issues with her last week, but now I can't stand the sight of her. That's so random. Every time I see her, I'm like, ah, Cyrel. Did you have feelings towards her pre-Saturday?

Nah, nothing. I'm sure she's a lovely girl, actually. But no, I'm just like, oh, can't stand her. That bitch. Anything else ticked you off, like muesli or the sun? Like any little things? This is what my idjim's about. My idjim's just me for the week.

So hold that thought. But yes, you've got to deal with this version of me until I think it's... Jen, I'm going to put you to work. Can you Google it? I think it's Feb 21. Okay. First Google of the year. Also, actually, can'm going to put you to work. Can you Google it? I think it's Feb 21. Okay. First Google of the year. Also, actually, can you just Google, for those who don't know, what does Mercury in retrograde

actually mean? Because I'm one of those people that doesn't know. Like, I don't know what it actually means. I just know that I start acting a bit whack. I don't know. Someone actually said to me yesterday, Mercury's in retrograde explains everything. Oh, it's not an excuse, though. You can't just buy it.

You can't do a triple homicide and go yeah yeah yeah Mercury's in retrograde. I did that once. I used to be like that but now I get it. Like I said a little bit more unhinged every time. Oh it's up here. Oh okay Jen has been made redundant. Beautiful Sam's googling for us.

I did that. In 2021 Beautiful Sam is out outside the glass box. Hi Beautiful Sam. Hello. Happy 2021. It's going out outside the glass box. Hi, beautiful Sam. Hello. Happy 2021. It's going to take me a while to get used to having someone who wants to be helpful here. I know. You've seen the videos.

We're flanked by screens. One of the screens in the middle just removed our brand new beautiful 2021 artwork, I should say. Do we need to give anyone a shout out? Isn't there someone that helps? Oh, yeah. One of our listeners did that. Yeah. Saved me a lot of time.

Liam, good on you. Thanks, Liam. A graphic designer. The middle screen just died and up-posted the Google search. You're not off the hook, Jenna. I'm still waiting for you to tell me. Yeah, you Google it and let's see if it has a different meaning. It's the exact same.

It says, okay, Mercury. Okay, I'll read it off my screen. Three or four times a year, the planet Mercury is said to go retrograde. That is to say it moves in an opposite direction to planet Earth. And why does it make me behave like a bit of a tool every time? I prefer Sam's. It's the exact same. Beautiful Sam says Mercury retrograde will either zap you with your usual zest

and leave you feeling lethargic or fill you with chaotic scattered energy that might have you feeling restless, unfocused and anxious. Oh! Oh, no. What? Yeah, okay, yep. But it doesn't say anything. Unhinged!

It doesn't say anything about being, like, just irrationally mad. I feel like, you know when people are pregnant and they just have weird cravings they don't usually have? Yeah. I've just got weird hatreds all of a sudden. To be fair, though, this, I mean, that really is, it's just sort of you. But last week I was so like, wow, optimistic, full of hope. 2021

is going to be amazing. So you've got to February 21 to deal with this. Well, I think Let me see what day that is. February 21. It is. Oh, it's a perfectly square month. Oh, it's a Sunday. Okay, so quite a There's a few podcasts to go.

In two weeks. In two weeks. We'll be on Instagram Live, Mitch, so can you report in on Instagram Live on Sunday if it instantly? You know what I'm going to do? I'm going to mark it now. I'm going to print out an A4 photo of Cyrel. I'm going to hold it up.

And if you've punched your ring light out of frame, we know it's not Mercury in retrograde. Mitchell is just awful. We're back. We're refreshed. The new opener is it's not Mercury and Red Dread. Mitchell is just awful. We're back. We're refreshed. The new opener is there. Go back and have a listen. It's real fun.

If it is your first time listening, what the hell have you been doing? You had plenty of time to go back and binge. But we start the show the same way we do every week for three seasons in a row with an idjim. It's an is it just me, something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. And let me tell you, my note section is bursting at the brim.

Me too. Even Hayden. I was like, I'm like, Hayden, you expressed a problem. He's like, that's probably more of an idgum than a boyfriend. I'm like, oh, fair. All right, thanks. So dive back into notes. Well, look, after the idgums, we're going to be doing another round of this.

Jenna decides. Yeah, Jenna decides. Every time we're torn on something, we leave it up to our third wheel to make the call. And this one relates to the most bizarre job offer, basically, that Mitch and I had over the holidays. It's the weirdest opportunity that's

become available to us. It's keeping me up at night and I'm getting cold sweats. It's something we never thought we'd be asked to do, but here we are, Jenna, you're the one making the call. Me in particular. The fact that I was on the radar, this is truly shocking. Can we do it now? No.

No, Jenna. I'm putting it at the end of the show. We're doing it later on. We're also doing another TikTok school. Yeah. You know how I got you to do that in the last episode? Yeah. I loved it.

We're bringing it back. I had a lot of family at Christmas say, let's do Mitch's cake trick. I didn't invent that, guys, but I'll take the credit. And then it's like, Mitch, it's a genius idea. Don't use the good crystal. All right, man, I'll use a plastic red cup. So TikTok school coming up. Who wants to go first?

First, the gym of season three. You go first, I insist. Okay, here we go. I feel like a ceremonial, like it's the first one. It's really not that special. Okay, let's do it. Here we go. Is it just me or?

Do you think we invented this? Now, take a listen. I don't say our impact is global, but I think something we did last season has influenced the international media. Chickens. Wow. This is a grab from the Today Show in America, which is huge. The major morning breakfast show.

Yeah. They interviewed Rob Lowe. Beautiful interviews in the new season or something. Rob Lowe's like Parks and Recreation. Very good looking American man. And he's got a new show, Lone Star, whatever. And I was, you know, like they air the Today Show on like Channel 7 at like 10 a.m. And that's when I get up.

So I put it on. I'm drinking my coffee. And I catch the end of the interview and just listen. You'll know exactly what it is when you hear it. But they've changed up the way they hook their podcasts and I think it's because of our influence. Okay. Hit me with it.

Take a listen. Rob promised to keep us updated on any further neighborhood sightings of Prince Harry. And you can find Rob's podcast literally wherever you get yours. And speaking of, don't forget to subscribe to the Sunday Sit Down podcast to hear the full length interview with Rob Lowe. You can find it on Apple podcasts or wherever fine podcasts are served. We're not at a McDonald's. Oh, my God! Wow, okay.

So this was last season you were ranting about how people say or wherever you get your podcast. Whenever they're trying to plug that they have a podcast, it's like, yeah, we know to go to a podcast app. Duh, exactly. And we just heard that phrase overused, so these people are

clearly just googling synonyms like when you're trying to write an essay. I almost like that. Or wherever your podcasts are served. Wherever fine podcasts are served, was it? Play it again. I only have the end but I'll fast forward. Hold on. Rob Lowe. You can find it on

Apple Podcasts or wherever fine podcasts are served. Wherever fine podcasts are served. You just have to say wherever podcasts are served for this one. You couldn't say fine. No, I think ours is just fine. You know, it's not excellent. Wherever okay podcasts are served.

Like a shrug. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I just think people know how to find them now. Just like listen to me podcast. I'm not going to beg. You know where to go. What about when he said, oh, wherever you get yours? What does that mean?

It's like saying, you can find my tea towels wherever you get yours. The second drawer in the kitchen. Everyone knows. Oh, but see, that's so personal because we keep ours in the cupboard on the top of the oven. That's stupid. Hayden's very short. How do you expect him to reach? He doesn't fucking clean.

This is me doing it all. Also, your tea towel's burnt. I left it next to the stove top and it caught fire. Oh, no. It was so pretty. The Indigenous one. This is why we can't have nice things. Very true.

All right, well, our influence is far and wide, ladies and gentlemen, for season three. You ready for yours, Mitch? Absolutely. Let's go. Karen White, ladies and gentlemen, for season three. You ready for yours, Mitch? Absolutely. Let's go.

Is it just me or? Do some songs just make you irrationally mad? Oh, I have to hear it. The sound of some songs that just irks you. There's none that spring to mind. If I'm in a bad mood, yes, but not generally. Or if Mercury's in retrograde. If Mercury, yes, is in retrograde Yes, I'm finding myself just inherently pissed off Just by certain songs

Some of them have been years spanning though But the latest one that really fucks me off Is that Dua Lipa one What's that one that they're playing literally every 10 minutes in our workplace? Oh, Levitating is what we're playing. It's getting a lot of radio play. Yeah. And there's this one lyric in it, and every time I hear it, I literally, like, I want to gag.

It's like, it's such an ick. I hate it. The lyric or how the song sounds? Just that one particular lyric. Oh. You know. Oh, it pisses me off so much. Play it, right?

Okay. I'll tell you when. All right. You want me, I want you, baby. My sugar boo. That one. Oh, hold on, hold on, hold on. Wait, what is it?

If someone called me their sugar boo, I'd be so upset. Hold on. You want me, I want you, baby. My sugar boo. Oh. My sugar boo. I don't mind it. I mean, it's quite delightful in a way that Dua Lipa is at a point in her life when she's

not even trying to disguise how basic she is. No. By uttering fucked phrases like that. My sugar boo. Grow up. If, oh, sugar boo. But what could she replace that with? Ready?

You want me. I want you, baby. My sugar boo. I'm never too. What about, I want you, baby. You want me too, or something like that. Oh, hold on. I want you too. Very, yes, very interchangeable.

Anything. There's so many words that rhyme with boo. Now, I hate to flex this on you, and I haven't actually told you, but I was in the room when Dua premiered this song to the world, and she justified that lyric. She told us why. She said, this is what I call my partner, Ashwin Desist. What's his name, Ashwin Desist?

Oh, Hadid. Hadid, Hadid, Hadid, Ashwin Hadid. And she said, that's what we call each other, and I wanted a point of difference. I thought it was cute, and it stands out, and it's an earworm. And in every song, you should strive for an earworm. What does she mean she wants a point of difference? That's not unique on you sugar boo every basic slut in

my school that carried around a sue prey bag to p.e. prac called their fucking partners their sugar boo it's shit it's a little home economic shit is she trying to explain the lyrical genius behind sugar i want to make an earworm. And she has made an earworm. It's just a terrible worm that's burrowing deep in your brain. Yeah, like worms aren't a positive. You use them as fish bait. Like seriously, worms, if you find them in your apple, you're very upset. It ruins your day.

Very true. Why would you want it in a song? Should be an ear grub. But birds like worms. Jenna, I'm a bird, some would say. I enjoy it. Do you have others that annoy you or is it just this? So many.

There's another one they were playing at work heaps. Remember when they were doing that competition Bubble Boy? Oh, that, yeah. It's when they do the whole, like, the money's flying around, you have to grab the money, and they were playing that Bubble Butt song. Oh. I hate that. It just irks me so much.

It's, uh. You know what I mean, though, when a certain song is just really irritating and you're just like, I can't with this shit I have it here because it's on the same system as Carl Jack I don't mind this You know what it is Turn it off When they say bubble butt

That many B's in a row I picture their cheeks filling with air You know how you go Bubble butt That's exactly what it is in a row, I picture like their cheeks filling with air. Like, you know, you go. Oh, bubble butt. That's exactly what it is. So. Bubble butt.

Bubble butt. Bubble butt. Bubble butt. No, Jen, it's like bubble butt. Like you're literally. Bubble butt. You know what I picture when I hear the lyrics to Bubble Butt? Yeah.

I picture some fat thing in a grandstand of a football stadium. Oh. Who's just had one too many meat pies and he's just kind of vomiting all over himself. He's like. I can see that. Why is everyone looking at me as you say this? He's got sore stains on his singlet. No, I know what you mean. Like in those zombie movies when they get shot and they're like.

And all the pus. Decay. I literally sound like someone. Welcome to the game. A man's choking. He's choking on a hot dog. Help me. Oh, no, he's just singing.

I'm getting the sense that it's just me, though. No, I can picture that. No, but not that. Just songs in general that fuck you up. No, Ava Max. No, don't you say ill on my Ava. I can't stand that song. Sweet but psycho.

I will punch someone. This song. Oh, please don't. I hate this. I don't find it that annoying. No, I really hate it. Yes, but. There's one song that puts me off and it doesn't make me sick.

It makes me really depressed. Ooh, that's a very different discussion altogether. If we're going to do zooey songs, I'm down for that. No, but it's not like driver's license. You hear that and you go, oh, I could go down that path. There's something in this song that triggers chemicals in my brain to think of death. Oh. I don't know if this is it because I'm just getting the grab up, but it should be similar. there's something in this song that triggers chemicals in my brain to think of death oh i don't know if this is it because i'm just getting the grab up but it should be similar

oh that was a terrible grab but i can't even listen to it that song makes me so upset i love that song though it's on tiktok image and heap right yeah is that it yeah hide and seek makes me cry no what, What You Say. No, that's the Flowrider remix, you fool. It's called Hide and Seek. Oh, let's see if we have it. That Flowrider song samples Hide and Seek. Oh, here, here, here.

What you say. Oh, that you only meant well. I can't do it. That's terrifying. I love that song. Does it not terrify you? Can you find it from the beginning? Yeah. Not just the hook?

This one? No. Absolutely not. It's called Hide and Seek? Yeah. Maybe there's an ampersand. It was on high rotation on my iPod shuffle during my emo years. No, we don't have it.

We don't have the official. What? No, we don't have the official. Bring it up on YouTube. Yeah, okay. I know you hate it, but I insist. I love it. What makes me sad thinking about it? I think Hay don't have the official. Bring it up on YouTube. Yeah, okay. I know you hate it, but I insist. I love it. It makes me sad thinking about it.

I think Hayden's going to die. Is there any emotional attachment to the song? No, I've never. I just heard it once on the radio. Here we go. It's almost like Mercury Retrograde's making you a rational too. Sorry, that's a gurgle. Don't you dare bring that fader up.

We charge for ads now. Hey! All right, here we go. Ow! Ow! Don't you dare bring that failure up. We charge for ads now. All right, here we go. Ow! What the fuck is going on? Mitch is dissociated. Or is it disassociated?

Did I miss a syllable? How do you say it? Is it dissociated or disassociated? Did I miss a syllable? Dis. How do you say it? Is it dissociated or disassociated? Disassociated. Okay. Well, he's done that. Sinking feeling. Spin me round again And rub my eyes

I'm actually crying. Ha ha ha! Nope. There's only one thing to do to that song. No, no, I'm dead! Mercury of Etch-a-Gay Bra, I'm telling ya. Very upset. It wreaks havoc in all our emotions.

It's not just me. It makes me think of my dead grandfather. And then Hayden getting hit by a bus. I don't think of it as a funeral death song. Any more songs, Mitch, that upset you? So many. This is the one that has actually fucked me off for life. Yeah.

Because the local station where I grew up, Rock FM, used to play it relentlessly. I don't actually know what it's called or who it's by. Again, ready, set, go for life. Yeah. Because the local station where I grew up, Brock FM, used to play it relentlessly. I don't actually know what it's called or who it's by. Again, ready, set, go for Google. It's the one that's like... I think I might know. It's like...

Pass the job. Let's pass the job. Let's pass the job. Let it go. I interviewed him last week and guess what? You want to know a fun fact? He wrote that song in Newcastle, New South Wales,

before he went on at a pub. He was sitting there and, yeah, give me a drink. I have a shandy, love. I'll get a schnitzel. Is it good here? I'm inspired. Is this it? Yeah, this is it.

Isn't it let it go? Doesn't sound anything like it. Really? This one? Yeah. Do you know what it is? It's the way he says only no. He's like, only, only, only.

It sounds like, oh. It's got the similar twang to Tones and I, when she's like. No. Ready? Fuck, it's the extended intro, sorry. Oh, forward announcement. It sounds like. Coming up, Passenger wrote this song in Newcastle, New South Wales.

Do you know what it reminds me of? It reminds me of Scabbers on Harry Potter when he comes into a human form. Only when you find a way in the sky to snow. A human rat. Is that the... Yeah, I know. Turn it up. Prisoner of Azkaban.

You'll know what I mean. Only know you've been high when you're feeling low. Hold on. Only hate the road when you're missing home. Turn it off. No, no, turn it off. No, no, turn it off. No, I want to hear it. Is it Peter Pettigrew?

Is that Scabber's name? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Similar to this. It's that twang. I love tones and I say that doesn't count. Yeah, we love it. Yes. Come on the show.

You're welcome. Anyway. Any other songs? Probably. Those are the only and I, so that doesn't count. Yeah, we love you. Yes. Come on the show. You're welcome. Anyway. Any other songs? Probably. Those are the only ones I can think of for now. All right. All right. See, I do feel like there is some merit in the fact that our emotions are all over the

shop. I'm just getting irrationally mad. You're crying over nothing. Yeah, very true. You're crying over fictional things, like your boyfriend being hit by a bus. That hasn't happened. Could happen. Really?

No. Don't put that out in the universe. No, no. That's never going to happen, ever. Jenna, what are you upset about? Life. Thanks for bringing it down. I'm thinking of my dead grandma.

Actually, she's not dead. I was going to say she's alive and well. She's alive. She's alive. Is it just me? Harold Farms' number one podcast for skim milk drinkers. Yes, that's us. I don't actually drink skim milk, so that's not me, to be honest.

I hate skim milk. It's just watered down full cream. No, it's good. No, it's not. Yes, it is. I don't think so. Oh, it is. Okay.

If you want to leave us a review, five stars. For 2021, you can. It doesn't have to be five stars, by all means, right? Well, the bribery continues. If you leave a review and reread it out on the show and you get in touch saying, that was me that passed on the niceties, then you get a prize. I believe you found some mugs lying around. Yeah, we have an excess of eight mugs, I believe.

Yes, that's correct. So anyone who hears their review read out and gets in touch within the week, right? That's the rule? Yeah, so you've got seven days from now to claim your mug. DM me. No one else. No one is interested, right? You guys hate it if anyone messages you about a mug.

Yeah, you're our prizing pig department. The first one, Jackie Oshcourt says a road trip must have. I can't blame her. This is just after Christmas too. And she says, you guys are my favourite podcast. I just took a road trip over Christmas on my own. There was 48 hours of driving from Perth to Broome and back. And I listened to you the entire Incapitals way.

Wow. I even went back and listened to the first episode's hint. There are some epic mispronunciations on Churi's part. Interesting. Oh, please, please specify. Send them our way, Jackie. Personally, I think we need two episodes a week. No!

P.S. Bring back Coughing Fit Chicken. No, we can't. I will die. Although it's been long enough. We probably could. No, but that was before COVID. Oh, yeah.

Do it with a mask. COVID wasn't the problem. It was the fact that you kept, again, disassociating every time you did coughing fit chicken. And one time it gave you horrific back pain. I was like, all right, he's literally not fit to do it. It knocked my brain loose. Well done, Jackie. Let's do this.

This is quite sweet. Mitch, I love you. Mitch, you are the most beautiful creature I've ever seen. Getting to listen to your soothing voice over and over every week is like receiving a thousand cuddles. I know thousands of you guys are pining after you, but alas, so am I. Stay safe, my king. That's James is a meme.

I think he means you. Really? Yeah. Oh, I don't have thousands of guys pining over me, funnily enough. Just a dozen. Well done. You've got a mug. D-House, the two of you, please.

Thank you, James. His name is James. It was James, right? It was James. Thank you, James. James is a meme. James is a meme, apparently. Here we go. This is funny.

All right. Are we ready to be schooled, ladies and gents? No. No? You forgot the announcement, didn't you? What announcement? Merch March. Oh!

Yeah. You want to do the honors? Apparently. Everyone's been begging for merch. Yep. Absolutely begging And we're just here to let you know that it's on its way Merch March is happening

We're doing a limited edition run So start saving your pocket money That's all we're going to say for now Bank it up There are some very fun ideas And March is it Like it's going to happen in March And then not much after March

No merch after March Not much merch after March. So, yes. No merch after March. No merch after March. Not much merch after March. And look, muchly, I don't know where to go. Say not much merch after March ten times in a row really quickly. Well, there's not much merch after March. Not much merch after March. Not much merch after March.

Not much merch after March. Not much merch after March. Not much merch after March. Ah! That was good. That was good. That's my theatre school. You try.

No. Oh. I've got a lisp. That's unfair. Oh, true. I can barely was good. You got to six. That's my theatre school. You try. No. Oh. I've got a lisp. That's unfair. I can barely talk at the best of times. March is it, though. The merch is happening. So stand by.

Like Mitch said, save your money because there's some fun stuff coming. No rash shirts, Jenna. Stop false advertising. No, Jenna. All right. We ready to be schooled now? Yep. TikTok school time.

Wrong opener. No, it's not., we ready to be schooled now? Yep, TikTok school time. Wrong opener. No, it's not. That was the TikTok school opener. Is that the right one? Yes. So we like to take inspiration from other people's TikTok ideas. It's very uncreative on our part. Yeah.

We're just doing other people's ideas. But, hey, it's a bit of fun. And this one is a very pertinent way to kick off the new year. Okay. Because it's a bit of an opportunity to pass on some new year's motivation. Okay. So have you heard of Alana Higginbotham? Sounds like a journalist.

She's my new favourite TikToker, I gotta say. What bottoms flock together? It's Botham. Oh, really? Alana Higginbotham. Oh, I heard Pretty Sam. Did you hear Higginbotham? I definitely heard Higginbotham. I heard Higgin Botham. Oh, really? Alana Higginbotham. Oh, I heard Pretty Sam. Did you hear Higginbotham? I definitely heard Higginbotham.

I heard Higginbotham. I said Botham loud and clear. No, you said Botham. Where does Batman take place? I definitely didn't say that. Gotham. Gotham. No.

Okay, sorry. Botham. Higginbotham. Higginbotham? Quiet in my class. Sorry, sorry. Bitch. Sorry, Mr. Coombs.

Botham. I prefer Miss Rachel's class. Sorry, sorry. Bitch. Sorry, Mr. Coombs. Bottom. I prefer Miss Rachel's class. Sorry. I would suggest neither of you fuck with me while Mercury's in retrograde, okay? That's true. I don't want to say it again or I'll give you a demerit. Sorry, sir. Anyway, Alana Higginbotham, she does drive-by advice, basically.

She just kind of drives her car into the shop, passes on on a bit of wisdom out her window and then drives away. Oh, boss bitch. It's so good. I'm obsessed with it here. Have a listen. You're not actually confused about what to do. You just need the courage to do what you know is right. Don't try to manage other people's emotions when making a decision that's right for you and that you just

drive the way jesus and what the camera just stays put yeah and i'm like no come back i need to talk i need more where do i find the inner strength they're like horoscopes they're just kind of broad enough and yet oddly specific here's another one all right your biggest problem is expecting them to be any different than they've shown you they are. Move on and make memories with someone who cares. And then just drive off. Oh, I like that one. You know what I like about these?

Sometimes advice goes on forever. Too much. That's all I need. Like a little snippet. Yeah. Well, I hope you've got your own snippet. A little nugget of wisdom to share because I've got my keys. We're heading downstairs.

Oh, this is an excursion. Excursion. We are. Hold on. There's my permission from my mum. She signed it in red pen. I know it was meant to be blue pen, but she did it in red pen. I didn't get one.

We have to stay inside. I'm still going. We have to stay inside with Mr. Jemison. You know what he does to little girls. All right, we'll get mic'd up and then we'll check back in with you when we're downstairs. See you soon. All right, we're downstairs. Here we are.

Here it is. Oh. That's my car. He used the trick. There's the keys. Oh. Don't stuff it up. Tinder money.

All right. I'm ready. It's an Astra. It's still an Astra. Is it manual or is it auto? It's an auto. Can you not drive manual? No. Really? Of course not. I did not know that about you. It's still an Astra. Is it manual or is it auto? It's an auto. Can you not drive manual? No.

Really? Of course not. I did not know that about you. You city boy. That would actually... Jenna, you hop in. I don't know which side. Oh, Jenna.

Now, Mitch, I'm going to have to move your chair back. Oh, yeah, I'm a bit short. It's very far back. I'm going to have to squeeze in. Oh. Oi. Sorry, that's my elbow. All right, I'm in.

It's locked. Can you let Jenna in? It's very nice. Sorry, Jenna, it's unlocked. Oh, one of Mitch's squishies is on here. Yeah, I always keep one handy. Alright, I'm in. Okay, so, have you thought of your quote yet? Yeah, I've got a couple.

Oh, okay. Should I run you by some? No,? Yeah, I've got a couple. Oh, okay. Should I run you by some? No, no, no. No, surprise me. All right, all right. Focus on driving. Very nice car, Mitch. Thank you.

Okay, so remember, you just drive into shot. Yeah. And I'm going to be quite close to the window, so don't run over my toes. Okay. And pull up, say your piece of wisdom you drive by inspo and then keep going okay i've changed your mirror by the way hey all your mirrors have been changed okay i'm ready you ready yep you're gonna say action? Just go. Okay. Hope for the best, expect the worst. Life's a playin'. We're unrehearsed.

I did it! I did it! One take wonder! Oh my god. Oh, I accelerated so quickly and there's a cliff there. I thought we were gonna. Well done. I thought we were gonna die too.

Did we do it? You even included a token cheery fake laugh. I did, yeah. I've got another quote I want to do though. Oh, okay. Alright. Alright. Reversing!

Put the hazards on. Okay, ready? Oh, there's an orb. That's nice. Laughter is the best medicine. But if you laugh for no reason, then you need medicine. Oh, God! Why do I always do that?

Careful. Sorry. We did it! Well done. That was my favourite one. Congrats. Jenna, do you have any words of wisdom? I'm going to have to go from the passenger side.

Yes? No? Yes. Okay, great. Mitch, you're going to have to be from the passenger side um yes no yes okay great Mitch you're gonna have to be her driver she can't drive all right reversing Jenna you're gonna need to put the window down all right you ready I'm gonna lean back because I don't want to be in this shot and Jenna I swear if you waste this opportunity to give a Brie Larson plug, watch room. No, that was the first thing, but I've thought of something else. And these can't be quotes based on your previous life.

So don't go, don't a-strinketh the milketh if it soureth. Don't. That's my favourite quote. The bread rises on the smallest den. Like, no one understands that, Jenna. Mitch, you're definitely going to be in the background, so just be mindful of your facial expression. Hold on, what if I lean back like this? It makes no difference. You're not small. Who understands that, Jenna? Mitch, you're definitely going to be in the background, so just be mindful of your facial expression.

Hold on, what if I lean back like this? It makes no difference. You're not small. Off you go. On three. One, two, three. And we go. Hello world.

This is me. Life should be. Ooh, fun for everyone. Was that a head of my tennis song? It's from the Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Yeah. Saddle Club.

Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Oh, fun for everyone. Was that ahead of my tennis song? It's from the Saddle Club. Saddle Club. Yes.

All right, good-o. Are we swapping? Yeah, I want to go. Oh! Give me a go. I want to go in my own car. Yeah, all the settings are quite fucked. Oh, no. Can I try driving your car for fun?

No! What kind of idea? You're unlicensed. No. The weirdest idea of fun. Can I kill a car for fun? No! What kind of idea? You're unlicensed. No! Weirdest idea of fun. Can I kill a miner for fun? Can I skydive without a parachute? No worries.

My mirrors are all munted. You're right. Reversing. Very good driving. Yeah, he is a good driver. Alright, ready? Oh, he's putting his sunglasses on. I'm on tonight.

You know my hips don't lie and I'm starting to feel it's right. And my hips don't lie and I'm starting to feel it's right. I have another nice one that I saw on Zoe Marshall's Instagram story. Okay, nice. Yeah, because that wasn't really inspirational, that was more factual. No, yeah. All right, three, two, quiet on set, action. If everyone in the world ate the exact same thing every day and did the exact same amount

of exercise every day, we'd still all be different shapes and sizes stop comparing your body to others that was fantastic that was beautiful that was i feel inspired that was really nice well done good challenge tiktok school officially out of session yes let's head back upstairs all right wow are we feeling inspired i think. I think yours was the best, Mitch. Jenna's was just too commercial. We didn't pay for the rights. We have to get that clear now. No, mine was an inspirational quote.

From Saddle Club? No, no. How funny would it be if I beeped Jenna's? Everyone just thinks she drove past and went, can't! Hello, beep! Who says beep? It's like a dirty mouth, Jenna! All right, Jenna, calm down, because we need you to make a wise decision on our behalf, okay?

Is it time? It is time. Jenna? Here we go. Jenna decides. Now, Mitch and I had an interesting opportunity come our way over the summer break. I actually, I got a message from the agency I work with. They were like, so Mitch Cherry asked his team

to get in contact with us. And I was like, sorry, are we doing the whole my people will talk to your people? I did, I did. I sent my management to his. It was very funny. Yes, but as it turns out, it was because it was a paid opportunity

and it's a rule we have to go through them. So the paid opportunity is something that we really never, to go through them so the paid opportunity oh don't i don't it's something that we really never ever ever ever ever ever ever thought that would be brought our way we were approached to do a photo shoot in our underwear i wish i was kidding me me me too jenna My first question, not to be self-deprecating and, you know, not body positive, was have they seen us? Yeah. They specifically asked you and I.

We want Mitch and Mitch. Yeah. So it's just undies, not a singlet or anything? Full-blown underpants. We want him nude. Yeah, no. Nude? They will not sign off unless it's nude. Can you stop him nude. Yeah, no. Nude? They will not sign off on this as nude.

Can you stop saying nude? There's no nudity. Underwear. Underwear. There's a very big difference. Yeah, but there's a lot. For me, everything gets sucked in wood, so it's almost nude. And so I said to the people, I said to the guys I work with,

I was like, I mean, do you think we should go for it? Yeah. And they said, to be honest, we've looked over the offer and it's kind of crap. Like, for what they're asking, it's not a huge amount of money. I mean, don't get me wrong, I would have had to have worked quite a few Macca's shifts to get that much money. But for what they were asking, it was going to be, like,

quite a long day, like longer than your normal nine-to-five job. Like, a very long day. A shoot five job. Like a very long day. A shoot day. Yeah. A very long process. And it wasn't just the money per se. It was also the usage rights that came with it. Oh my God, the list.

The usage rights included, and were not limited to, TV, billboards, in-store posters. Outdoor advertising. Everything. Bus shelters. Billboards. Cats.store posters. Outdoor advertising. Everything. Bus shelters. Billboards. Cats. The back of taxis.

And they said to me, I mean, we can go back asking for more, but, like, how much would you want to be paid to have pictures of yourself in underwear on a billboard? And I was like, this sounds like a dare. Literally, like, you know, at sleepovers, how they're like, oh, my God, would you kiss your dad for a million dollars? They're literally asking, how much would you want to be paid to be on a billboard in underwear?

And I was like, forget about it. It was everywhere. So it would be both of you in your underwear. That's what I thought. Is Mitch on my shoulders? Are we straddling? Are we holding hands? Anyway, so we talked about it and they said, look, let's not go for it.

It's probably not a fit. So I said to Mitch, look, I don't think this is for us. Let's not go for it. And he said, I've already said yes. Oh, my God. Are you serious? I signed off on it. I signed a campaign contract.

I see. I don't turn down work. I don't get TikTok deals. I'll do it. I signed a campaign contract. I see. I don't turn down work. I don't get TikTok deals. I say, I'll do it. Put me on the back of the receipt rolls when people get a cold. See the advertisements on the back? Put me on. So the question now, Jenna, the moral dilemma we're in is, do I now

have to, you know, in an act of solidarity, also say yes, even though he jumped the gun and said yes without actually, you know, coming to a unanimous decision? Do I have to then, you know, be a good friend and be like, fine, we're in this together? Or do you say, tough tits, you signed the thing,

you're on your own, bucko. You can't force me to do that. Jenna, look me in the eyes. Don't let me do this. I can't do it. I'm going to have kids one day. And there'll be a photo of me on a billboard on Pitwater Road. You're acting like this is out of your control.

You signed the fucking contract. Yeah, it's happening. Yeah, but I need him with me. We can turn it into something. Turn it into what? A porno? Where are we going to go from there? No, we could make fun with it and go, guys, can we have a bit of silliness?

Nah. There's so much silliness in the world available to us. That's not silly. That's just fucking ridiculous. That's not me at all. I can't believe this is happening. I hope they're not white undies because there'd be some follow through. Yuck.

Jenna. What are you saying? It would be threadbare. Huh? After you, it's like, anyway. Oh,

my eyes. Okay. Mitchell. What do you think? Mitchell Coombs. Yes, Jenna. I do think this will be a great opportunity.

For exposure. Literally, exposure. So, I think it would be quite funny to watch Mitch do it on his own. How? No, no, no, no. Well, it's hard to argue with that.

Jenna's decided. No, this is a great opportunity for you. Mitchell's got Tinder. What? I've got my dating life on display. You've got your bulge on display. You know, we're all just carving our own path here. All right.

Jenna's made it. That's it. Done. You're going to do it. Thanks. I'm proud. So I've signed up. That's exciting.

Enjoy your 76-hour shoot. What are you going to be doing? He's providing meals, by the way. Can you come and... Ordinarily a shit pay packet, they'd be like, oh, but we'll give you no muffins and a croissant. Nothing. There's no catering.

Nothing. You went through it with a fine-tooth comb. No, they did. They literally said, this is a shit deal. I was like, I take your word for it and I also don't want to do it. So, like, there's literally no incentive. Oh, no. I think it's a great opportunity.

You don't run my life. I can pull out. They could take you to court. You've signed a document. What? Mitch refuses to get in his undies? Well, you've signed a contract. If you don't deliver what you signed off on.

To do the shit. I'll just be sick on the day. I'm just going to start ghosting them. Or, you know when everyone's like, my nudes have been released. Or they'll be released on the 5th of March and then I'll release them on the 4th just so I have the power. I will post a photo in my undies the day before and they'll go,

we don't want to do it anymore. The contract is null and void. Yeah, maybe that's the method we'd use to get out of it. You'd just be such a punish to work with that they'd just like, nah. Call them every day

in the lead up and go, I'm so excited. Just like make them think you're a bit unhinged. I don't know, what should I do? I'll call them and go, hello guys. Just. Just like make them think you're a bit unhinged. What should I do? I'll call them and go, hello, guys. Just a question. Is chafing going to be a problem on the day?

Guys, hi, sorry. I know I called you 10 minutes ago, but do you provide your own talc powder? Say you've got diarrhoea. I've got severe diarrhoea. You're not in the new white range, are you? Mitch, we're actually launching the new linen range with you. Oh, well. What does your boyfriend think of it?

He loves it. He's all about the exposure. He's like, it'd be great for you. Do it, do What does your boyfriend think of it? He loves it. He's all about the exposure. He's like, it'd be great for you. Do it, do it, do it, do it. I agree. You know what I mean? My underpants, Jenna. I've got nipples the size of dinner plates.

It looks like an ad for Maxwell Williams. Someone's like, oh, look at those beautiful bones, Jenna. There is nipples. Well, congratulations on the opportunity, no less. Here's the thing. That deserves a clap. Thank you. My first brand deal.

Yay. Yes. This is exciting. Speaking of which, perfect opportunity to mention that next week on the show, Abbey Chatfield's going to be on. Queen of the Jungle. For our Valentine's Day special. She sure is.

Yeah. Abbey Chatfield, star of, she was in The Bachelor. She was famously voted off on the finale. Didn't win the love. And she just recently won the Australian version of I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Out of Here. She's the queen of the jungle and she's in studio with us next week. And in amongst all that, her and I have been trying to fix each other's love

lives. You might have seen all the Tinder dates that we posted on our TikToks and stuff. Jesus Christ. So yeah, we've got to debrief about that, I feel. Can't get rid of them. Love the ads. Did you find anyone there or will we have to wait till next week? Oh, we'll get into that next week. Interesting.

And you have a history with Abby, right, Jenna? Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's her history with Abby? Yeah. Past life. Oh, right, of course. Abby has been on the podcast before. She was guest hosting that time you were away.

I know, and I believe I spoke ill of her. Yeah, you did. You called her Abby Slutfield the next week. I don't think I would have done that. We also did get complaints when she was on. So it's going to be interesting to see how loose she is, you know? She didn't even say anything that filthy last time. I don't know if anyone's heard her podcast.

She likes to overshare. It's a lot. Very intimate detail. It's also my opinion on It's A Lot, the podcast. No, I love Abby and she's on next week and we will see you guys then. Thanks for listening to the first episode of Season 3. Looking forward to it. See you then. Bye. Is it just me?

Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app or follow on Spotify. So you're going to get a fake tan or? Yeah, what's the preparation? We have to welcome everyone first. Sorry, welcome to ADD Brief. This is the secret segment that we just hide on the end. The idea is that we trick all the losers out of listening. we pretend the show is done and then we just go right let's just shoot

the shit nothing planned we just kind of ramble at the end here what type of like poses will you do i should just say sorry uh carrie bradshaw says love the show i think she's a fictional character is she sam is she real or fictional? Oh, no, very real. Really? Yeah, she's real. She's real. Carrie Bradshaw.

I think I'll wear, do I get to choose? Like if I can wear briefs. Why don't you ask your management who got you into this crap? They represent Julie. What's her name? Are you going to say Julie Rafter who was also fictional? Julie Rafter. Rebecca Gibney.

Why am I thinking of fictional people? What the fuck is wrong with me? I had a great dinner last night with Batman. He was awesome. Me and my close personal friend, Professor Snape, we caught up recently. You know what? I was in terrible traffic on the way here,

and I pulled in front of the car that was honking the whole trip. Guess who was driving? Who? The BFG. Do you know who I caught up with today? Who? Peter Rabbit. How is he?

He's really good. Yeah, still hopping along? Yep, still hopping along. He dated Squidward for a bit, right? He did, he did. They were on the rocks. Oh, not a good end to that story. Squidward wasn't out.

No. Anyway, I don't know what I'll do. I don't know. I'll talk to my management tomorrow. Someone's calling me. Oh, take it. It's good, but wasn't I out? No. Anyway, I don't know what I'll do. I don't know. I'll talk to my management tomorrow. Someone's calling me. Oh, take it. It's one of my friends. Probably a brand deal.

Hey, Shrek. That was good. Yeah, I'm free. I'll see you. I'll see you after. It won't be much longer. I'm just going to wrap up. I had a debrief.

Cool. Yeah, right. I'll see you, bye. That was good. That was very good. That was clever. I thought so. It's more elaborate, the story.'ll see you, mate. That was good. That was very good. That was clever. I thought so. It's more elaborate, the story.

We've discussed this before. It's the same as the mispronunciations. How stupid the lead-up is. The lead-up is. As if the BFG would be... Also, he's a giant! What is driving this giant truck? Picture him in this tiny little...

With his elbows out the window and his knees up against his chin. Hung, hung. Terrible. With his elbows out the window and his knees up against his chin. Terrible. Don't get me started on Jack and the Beanstalk. Oh, that bean takes it everywhere with him. Why did you bail him out lunch on this weekend? Pardon? The lunch we had with the seagull from Finding Nemo.

Not even named characters? I was hanging out with my friend Angela Anaconda. Oh, who was the bitch in that? Ninny Poo. Ninny Poo! Oh! I threw a pen. That was a good reference.

Ninny Poo, Ninny Poo. What are you going to do? My headphones just got pulled out of excitement. Angela! Clues love pulling out with excitement. And a cup. It's normally with no energy for me. Very lethargic at that point.

Anyhow. Where were we? Talking about my brand deal? Yeah, you're getting your fucking, you're wearing jocks for a photo shoot and I shan't be joining you. Well, I don't know if I'm going to wear the jocks. What the fuck are you going to wear? What do you wear on a day-to-day basis? Are you a boxer brief with a little bootlegs?

Like you're going for a little swim? There's undies that have the little legs in them to cut your thighs. Oh, yeah. That's what I wear. Pretty Sam? Beautiful Sam? Yeah, just kind of like normal jocks. I guess not like the ones that look like speedos,

but the ones that have got a little bit of leg. Yeah. Like trunks. Trunks It's like trunks. Trunks. I think trunks is right. I call them booty shorts because we're gay men. So we all wear the same. What about a jockstrap?

Oh, I don't own one. Hayden does. They would. Oh, my gosh. Should I ask for a jockstrap? Yes. We don't have a jockstrap. It depends what they want to showcase in the photo shoot.

You're just the puppet. You're the model. What am I, though? What am I for them? Certainly not the most glowing endorsement they could have summoned, but whatever. They're just telling people that this is an option. What?

Big boys. Do you reckon that's what the angle was? No. I reckon they're going to have a whole bunch of D-list celebrities and they're all going to be standing in a line. Did I tell you I recently, I always vowed that I would never do a TikTok dance. I was like, that's not for me.

Yeah. I recently did one because it was in partnership with Mardi Gras. Oh, you've signed on. You're doing like an ambassadorship, right? Yes. And I had to go to rehearsals. Sorry. Firstly, side note, they said, oh, you just have to take part in our hashtag challenge.

Now, when you hear challenge, does that not just sound like ice bucket challenge or some sort of dare? The Harlem Shake. Planking. Yeah. No, that was a dance. And they're like, here are your rehearsal times he's you're going to be meeting with the choreographer what and so i had to learn a dance

actually hold on no by the time this episode's out i'm pretty sure the tiktok will be live you had my first ever tiktok dance really yeah and anyway they said i said to them fuck guys i can't dance for shit right and they gave me like such a backhanded compliment they're like that's okay we wanted to be inclusive we didn backhanded compliment. They're like, that's okay. We wanted to be inclusive. We didn't want everyone to be perfect at dancing. That's why we chose you. And I was like, oh, so I'm like the token unco.

Don't do that. That is nice though. So maybe you're the token. Big one. Yeah. I don't mind being that. Hey, we preach body positivity. I'm very happy.

I wasn't able to change this months ago, years. Oh, well. Are you actually going to try and get out of it? No, please don't. Please do it. I think I made the right decision that you should go ahead with it. No, it was whether or not he will. I'm always stuck in this position.

He's already in. I still think you could do it. You'd look great. No, no, he declined the offer. No, no, no, no. I can still try and convince. Politely. With a smile, I said, thank you for considering me, but nah.

Oh, well. I wonder what colour they're going to be. Yeah. Maybe when Justin Bieber did that Calvin Klein campaign, and then they photoshopped his dick. Do you think that's something I'm going to have to request? Not that I need it. No, I would probably need it.

I'd be very nervous. It's like a sea urchin. I just know what I look like when I, because I've got one of those wardrobes along. You're talking about penises. No, I've got one of those wardrobes that's like all mirrors. So I get up in the morning and if I'm just wearing jockers, I go, ah. I was so fine thinking that that's not what I looked like

just wearing underwear. So I definitely am not interested in bearing all for not a lot of Doc. Literally, like I said, it sounded like a dare. They're like, how much would you do it for? I was like, I don't know. I've never thought about this. Yeah. When Hayden and I were looking for houses, I'm like, we cannot

have a mirror in the bathroom. You kind of need a mirror in the bathroom. No, we have one, but it doesn't face the shower. We went to one open house and there was a full length mirror facing the toilet. I don't want to see that. You need to stare into your soul. No! It's an awful position. Just one above the sink.

One above the sink is all you need. Nice little cabinet too, so you can open it and hide it if you need to. What if you get a fucking stiffy during the shoot? Have you thought about that? No, because I've worried about that in massages before and I've been fine. You can suppress it if you push hard enough. Oh, my God. I fucking got a massage recently.

Mum got me a voucher over Christmas and i went to the massage and after it finished the chick was like oh you're not as relaxed as i would have liked i was like what do you mean and she goes oh well usually people fall asleep during these massages and i was like oh i didn't know that that was the norm because like i felt myself nodding off but i was like how humiliating i can't fall asleep on the massage table. And she goes, no, no, no, no, no. We take that as a compliment. Also, if a man gets an erection, that's a big compliment too. And I'm like, well, I'm sorry I did neither for you,

but it was a lovely massage, no less. Oh, my God. They actually said that to you? Yeah. Apparently that's them being like, job well done. If you're a masseuse, can you please message us and let us know if that's true and if you have any horror stories but i because we want to capitalize and talk about

them on the show but i feel like that's disgusting and that's definitely like a management thing like how can we spin this so we don't get assault claims oh in training they'd be like it's a compliment that means men happy with massage i think it's just like a bodily response you know like if you relax it's not the masseuse never implied that she would then proceed to molest you nothing i don't know how your mind got there actually that's concerning because someone could be doing it and they go oh my god this man is getting off on me touching them that's how okay if they start to jack off that's where it becomes a problem but if they're asleep and they get a stiffy and it's kind of beyond their control

it's like oh that's nice look how relaxed they are no if it was the other way around the amount of creeps also they've got a towel over them and they're usually lying stomach down like they're massaging the back and their face is in the hole jenna tongue kiss me just put a towel on it makes all sexual assault fine also it may be a compliment for them but getting a fucking siffy when you're lying on your stomach that that's not ideal. That would be very uncomfortable. Yeah, how would they notice? Maybe the hips rise up like a forklift when you break down on the hume.

You know, my dad got banned from the massage place he took me to as a kid. Why? Because I played aggressive water polo in National League Australian Tournament. Sorry, what? That's the context. I had to go get massaged. Aggressively? But since when did you do that?

Anyway. I played National League water polo. All right. My nickname was Noodles. Anyway, my dad would take me to get the lactic acid massaged out of my joints. And dad and I would go together. And I kid you not. I think I'll...

Let me get some... Let me set this in. So this is the music they play. It's like very herbal. You know when you're done and they take you out the front? You're all done. Come to the front. We'll sort out the bill. And I'm like, 14. No worries. So take you out the front? You're all done. Come to the front, we'll sort out the bill.

And I'm like, 14. I'm like, no worries. So I walk out the front and Dad pays. And then all I hear is this quiet, tranquil massage parlor in the middle of Westfield, Miranda. Thank you. Hey, mate, how was that? Was that good? I was like, yeah, Dad, that was really good.

I really enjoyed it. Yeah, man, HCF card. We'll get the payment back. Mr. Turi, we've had complaints about the noises that you make during the session. Oh, mate, that's just my bodily function. That's what happens. I'm enjoying it. It's not... We'd request that if you can't stop that from happening,

then we don't have you back at this. Take it as a compliment, you dog. That's what happened. Dad got banned because he would groan and moan and... Well, I've got a lady who has a home studio that would just be thrilled if he did that to her. I'll put him in touch. At her house?

Yeah, she has, like like a home set up. Oh, your mum put you onto her? Where are you going with this? I don't understand the joke. There's no joke! I want to know! Yes, because she's like literally two blocks from my house. You're right, so your mum would be very good.

Right next door to Karing Funerals, in fact. Oh, yes! We love Karing! Shout out to Karing! Shout out! Aren't they good? They're so good those coffins it's almost like it's not wood it's just so high quality speaking of you said hcf card right yes so i over the over the break i was clearly quite bored and i was like i've been paying fucking

health insurance for ages yeah and i've never once claimed any of the benefits. I went online, looked at what I could claim, and one of them was, like, free eye tests. Oh. So, I got one, just thinking, alright, I'll check in, and then they were like, yeah, you need glasses. And so that's why I'm wearing these, obviously. I don't know why you, why are you gasping like you have only just noticed? You know about

the glasses. I know about the glasses. I meant that you need them. I was shocked that you needed them. Yeah, well, I'm not wearing them for fun i'm debuting glasses today everyone i picked them up on the way here they are nice are you short-sighted long-sighted well these ones actually make everything close to me crystal clear but mitch is actually a bit blurred so it's like kind of defeating the purpose but um anyway i also was like what else can I claim? Chiropractics. Oh. Now, let me tell you, poor old home studio massage lady was not even close to getting the compliment she wanted downstairs.

But that chiropractor, I didn't bar up, but shit, there's something erotic about a man on your back trying to crack you. It's kind of kinky. I was like, whoa. Well, no, it's the whole body weight, right? Like it's. Yeah. And you know that bit where they kind of like put your shoulders behind you and then they

just like lift you and you go. Oh. I was being cracked left, right and center. I've got another appointment tomorrow. Did you actually get, did you crack in places? So many. Really? That's their job.

No, no, I know. But sometimes you don't crack. Did you get the neck? Yep. Oh, I've never, I've never been to a chiropractor in my life. Me too. Oh, it was fantastic. I reckon there'd be a lot in me.

Were you shocked? Yep. Wow. Did it hurt at all or was it just nice and relaxing? It was a bit of both. No, it didn't hurt. It was relaxing, but sometimes you have to get a little bit deep tissue. Because I have a fucked shoulder, basically.

This left one is so fucked. And he was having to massage me. Okay, this is going to be a little tense. And I was like, yeah, because I have a fucked shoulder, basically. This left one is so fucked. And he was, like, having to massage me. Like, okay, this is going to be a little tense. And I was like, yeah, it is. But it's fine. I was there to get it fixed. Did he massage your carpal tunnel?

Eh? What's in your wrist? Oh, my RSI. RSI. That's not an issue anymore. Oh. Cute. Yeah.

Anyway, I, yeah, it was a lot. And he also was asking me, so what do you do? What's Kyle Sanderland's like? Oh. And you know what he said? What he also was asking me, so what do you do? What's Kyle Sanderland's like? And you know what he said? He goes, oh, so what do you do? I was like, I work in a radio. I also do a podcast. I was telling him about the podcast.

Yeah, nice. And he goes, I have to tell you, when I saw who the appointment was for, I thought, Mitchell Coombs, that's such a famous name, isn't it it that sounds like the name of someone that's famous and I was like no I actually had a conversation with the other Mitch that I work with on the podcast and we said there are no famous Mitchells are there like we can't this is not a famous name and he goes no it's not the name Mitchell it's the combination of Mitchell and Coombs what's the other Mitch called and I I said, Mitch Turing. And he goes, nah, that's not a famous name. And I was like, yeah, yeah, harder. He went deep breath.

He's like, anyway, hold still. No more bloody business promoting for him. What's his name? Can't recall, actually. I'm glad you've been fixed and put to place, Mitch. Yeah, my eyes are better. My back's better. Isn't it a good feeling when you claim and they go,

you'll get X amount back and you go, oh, yes. But then it's also kind of like counterproductive because I'm like, I probably wouldn't have fucking paid for this if I didn't have the cover. It's like I'm paying money to get money back, even though I could have just kept the money in the first place. Although I did thoroughly enjoy the chiropractor car i don't have any cover you're not privately insured no well we're lucky to live in this country where we have good public but unless

you're getting all those things i need it for my brain condition my what is it mitch kiari malformation what is good hayden doesn't even know what it's called um so i need it for like stuff but you probably don't need it and you've died 17 times? 19 yeah has that come into I've had it twice during that time yeah

and why bother yeah it was crap though because when I got it you know how you have to have the insurance for a certain amount of time

before you can claim certain things yeah I got major dental work and they were like that'll be $6,000 I was like no worries babe here's my insurance they were like, that'll be $6,000. I was like, no worries, babe.

Here's my insurance. They were like, sorry, you've only been on that insurance for 11 months. You need to be with it for 12 months. And I'm there with, like, gauze and blood all through my mouth. Like, what? I don't have that kind of money on me. Like, seriously, it was so fucked. I had to pay for it.

Fuck. I was like, um, who are you paying? A count of dollars. Right now. Why? I don't get how that works. They're always like, well, high caps will pay. But I'm like, who, who are you catching? Pick out a null and right now. Why? I don't get how that works. They're always like, well, high caps will pay. I'm like, who the fuck is high caps?

They always say that. There's a different machine. And it'll be 12 to 14 business days. I'm certainly familiar with high caps. I'll give you the tip, darling. It's been a while after COVID, though. Anyway, we should go, guys. Should we?

Yeah. Got lunch with Pippin. Oh, though. Anyway, we should go, guys. Shouldn't we? Yeah. Got lunch with Pippin. Oh, yes. Can we just listen to the Carrie Ann fall? We didn't dwell on that as much as we should have. We need to. Let's cut the closing music. Let's play the show opener in full.

We can have a little listen. No, just the Carrie Ann. That's all I need. People. Trapeze while performing. Why did you skip that? Because I thought we were going to go. Just go from the start.

People do some weird shit. Television legend Kerri-Ann Kennelly fell several metres from a trapeze while performing in the musical Pippin. Is that fair? That's what she gets for being a mole that time we were on Studio 10. Do you know what that, that, oh! It's guttural, first of all. Sounds like how you'd say when you

find out that your corgi's been killed. Oh! It reminds me of this. I'm typing. It's a viral video called Grape Lady Falls. Have you all seen Grape Lady Falls? Oh, yes! It's a news cross.

Oh, that's fucked up. It's a news cross from like, oh, it's got to be the early 90s. And they're at some farm and some estate and they're doing a giveaway for it. And the hosts of the morning show go, let's cross to Cicely who's, you know, stomping grapes at the estate. And they cross to this news presenter who is in a bucket full of grapes and she's stomping grapes.

Issue is she collapses. I've seen it. It's so fucked. And the audio is Kerri-Ann. The winner this Saturday who stomped music, eating international foods, having wine tours and tastings, vineyard tours. She's up on a platform, mind you. It's a lot of fun, a whole day.

Stop. She goes to step out. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh. fun, a whole day. Stop. She goes to step out. Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow she's actually hurt. Are you sick? Ow, ow, ow, I can't breathe. Ow. I always love watching news presenters like that trying to make a smooth recovery, because like, how can you? Listen to what they say. Okay.

Gosh, I hope she's okay. Oh, okay. We're going to make sure she is. We'll try and check on her and get back to you as soon as we can. We'll be back right after this. Jeez. Try and check on her and get back to you as soon as we can. We'll be back right after this.

Jeez. Have you seen the video where Lisa Wilkinson is reporting from Parliament House and the tent that they're underneath? You know those tents that you take, like, camping and shit? Oh, yeah, yeah. The tent that they were underneath for the broadcast, it was so windy it collapsed and, like, hit her in the head, like one of the metal bars. Oh, here we go.

And then Sylvia Jeffries jumps in and she, it was actually quite eloquent the way she did it. But I was like, it's almost like she was waiting for that to happen. Like she had the perfect phrase ready to go to pick up. About how that comes across to the electorate. Because the electorate are sick and tired of the people that they... It's all right, Lisa, I saved you. Am I not meant to be saved?

We're going to take over from there While they sort out the winds of change Sweeping through the nation's capital Right now We're going to take over from there While they deal with the winds of change Sweeping through the capital She fucking had that up her sleeve Knowing that that gazebo was going to collapse on Lisa's forehead

That's ridiculous What? That's ridiculous. What? That's like the Titanic sinking and they cross back to the journalist. Oh, well, we'll let those deal with the ship in the meantime. Sink your teeth into these adorable puppies. Like, ha! Do you remember when Sandra Sully, this one isn't that funny.

Oh, dear. It was like her natural reaction. But she was commentating 9-11 as it was happening live to air. And the story goes that it was like her and one other journalist in the building. And it'd be like me live on air and groundskeeper fucking Jenner trying to Google things for me. Handing me notes to read as everything's unfolding. The biggest crisis. So she wasn't actually watching the monitor. She was just reading from the paper.

And then one of the towers just completely collapses. And she doesn't notice. And then a few minutes later she goes, notices there's one missing and goes, Goodness me, I'm sorry. It appears that one of the towers is collapsed. And I was just like, I've just felt like the journalist, while she's there live on air, just waving, going, Sandra, you're missing it.

Sandra, it's gone. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And she's just like, goodness me, I'm sorry. Fuck. There's a whole building just falling. Have you seen this one? It's a reporter at the Sydney Royal Easter Show, Jenna. Oh, yes.

And he's holding a rooster. He's showing off the prize rooster. Everyone's seen this. Steve Jacobs. It attacks him. Here it is. It's been a shower or two and a top of 22 today. Sydney, fine and mostly sunny, 21 degrees.

Canberra, fine, sunny and 22 today. Melbourne, fine, becoming sunny and 22 degrees. I'll skip the report. One of 500 birds that are being judged today. He's holding a giant bird. Here we go. Ah! Ah! Ah!

He loses his shit because of this bird. Flaps and flaps. What an... That's not media professionalism. I mean, there's just nothing that ruins your day quicker than flaps and flaps. Couldn't agree more on that note. Thank you for listening to episode one.

How fun. Don't forget, Abby Chatfield's on next week, so we'll catch you then. There'll be a fourth wheel. I don't keep a little. I'm happy with that. That's fine. Yeah.

I've realised that Jenna has a serious issue with women every time they're on the show. Except Abby. I like her. I think she's the only one that Jenna hasn't been a dreadful cow towards. Toni Lodge. She was awful. She was awful for one year. She was. I like Abby. I think she's the only one that Jenna hasn't been a dreadful cow towards. Tony Lodge. She was awful. She was awful.

She was a trick tone. Nat Penfold. Cruel. She was even worse. Every time there's a woman here, Jenna gets her literal cat claw there. No, because they abuse me. Fiona, what was the girl's name from the podcast that got cancelled recently? Fiona? The pink hair. What?

Mary. Mary! You're a right cow to Mary. I liked Mary. You didn't show it. Well, Tony and Nat deserved that treatment. Okay? Here we go. So what we're saying is that Jenna does not support the sisterhood. She's a woman hater. But Abby, you're welcome next week. That is not true. Abby Chatfield, star of the stage

and screen next week. Stage and screen? What are you talking about? She's not fucking Meryl Streep. She's in Pippin. Hey, if you haven't seen that footage of Kerri-Ann crumbling, give it a go. Yeah, it's good gear. The funny thing is that Kerri-Ann is

like, oh no, 100 or something. But her character is a 70 year old and so she was kind of a fitting cast. She was kind of a perfect casting. But now that she's, like, maimed and in hospital after her fall, they've replaced her with an understudy who's, like, 22. So they've just drawn all these lines on her face

to make her look fucking decrepit. It's so funny. They're like, fuck, Carrie-Anne's gone. There's no-one senior enough to play the role. And then Carrie-Anne was like, oh, for the final performance, I'm going to make her come back. The final performance comes around. She's still unwell.

She can't do it. She's like, nah, I might tell RGM. They could get Rebecca Gibney. She needs the work. Anyway, I've got lunch with Fido. I've got to go. Is that a character, Fido? Isn't it a dog?

Oh, it's a little dog. Yeah. I've got to get home. I've got to feed Clifford. He's not a small red dog, I'll tell you that. No, he's not. Hey, how'd that date with Tin Tin go? Tin Tin.

Tin Tin. Oh. That was genuine. Tin Tin, the little gay guy with the little curl on his head. Oh, you're thinking of Tin Man from Wizard of Oz. No, Tin Tin. He's my ex. Really?

My ex-boyfriend, yeah. Yeah, he got stuck in the yellow bit road. What about Bob the Builder? Oh, he can build you any day, right? Oh, my God. Fill you with some gyprock. Putty my cornices, Bob. Nail my planks.

Slow screw against my wall if you don't hardly mind. Knock me down and rebuild me in a night, Bob. Don't know to build. All right. Jenna, who do you have lunch with tomorrow? Oh, tomorrow? Yeah. The Wicked Witch.

We're not getting lunch. The Wicked Witch of the West. Oh, you're meeting up with Abby before the interview. Terrible. All right, we'll see you guys next week. Goodbye. Bye-bye. Bye.