Is It Just Me? - #6: DIY Red Rooster

Episode Date: October 27, 2019

2-minute noodles are lying to us (02:51)Dating someone who's married (07:23)How to make your own Red Rooster 'Rooster Roll' (13:00)The Jack-o'-lantern challenge (22:37)Our "secret segment" ADDebrief (23:35)Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. This is it. This is a big one. This is for the girls. This one. Some things make more sense than others. Lindsay Lohan punched in the face after trying to take a boy away from a mother. You're a good little boy. I won't leave until I take you.

Brace yourself for observations you didn't ask for. That's the line. I see it quite clearly. Get new glasses. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of Mitches. Cinder, one Mitch is clearly better than the other one. I couldn't agree more.

Now here's Mitch Turi and Mitchell Coombs. You just chose the worst moment to take a giant bite. It's the best moment, I would say. You did that on purpose. I did. I'm eating food for a reason, everyone. I'm not just gross. You remember when Merlin came out on Big Brother with his mouth tape shut?

Yeah, Gretel was pissed. Similar level of protest today. I'm going to be eating my favourite fast food, Red Rooster. All show out of protest. For a very good reason. It's a dark time for Red Rooster fans like me at the moment. It really is. I'll get into that later on, alright?

He's furious. Plus, it is Halloween this week in a couple days. Woohoo. I love holidays. Did you see the amount of people in this suburb trick or treating tonight? Because time of record for us today is the Saturday before Halloween, and there's so many people out. Are you being serious?

Yes. I didn't see any kids. I didn't know, because it's one of those weird ones where Halloween's midweek this year. Oh, so they can't trick-or-treat. I didn't even think of that. Well, I reckon there still will be people trick-or-treating on the actual night, plus the Saturday or Friday after.

It's like, when do you do it? And also, who tees that up? Is it like a universal mum group? Who makes the decision? That's exactly right. When are we trick-or-treating this year? Listen also, who tees that up? Is it like a universal mum group? Who makes the decisions? That's exactly right. When are we trick-or-treating this year? Listen here, mums. We're doing it on the Saturday before.

We'll push book club the week after. Madeline's got dancing on Wednesday night. We just can't do it. I think it's a Thursday. I don't know. Tristan's got physio. Anyway, it's Halloween in a couple of days. So I thought we'd do a challenge that I've seen floating around,

inspired by the Zach Sang Show in LA. Popular radio show there. This is me, radio guy. Love me some radio. It's called the Jack-O-Lantern Challenge. You don't know what it is. So we'll be competing in a Halloween-themed challenge at the end of the show. Okay.

Wow. Can you just maybe wait a little bit? He's chomping down that chicken roll. I told you, I'm eating red rooster throughout the entire show today for protest. Okay, well why don't I go first with my idjim? Please do. While you just suck your fingers. Because we kick off the show each week, right?

Yes, we do. With an idjim. Just me. Idjim. I like to call them idjims. And they are a question that really no one needs the answer for. But we think... It's observations people didn't ask for.

Correct. That's it. But yes, we kick off the show with one idjim. We don't know what it is. No, exactly right. We're both as surprised as each other. So I'm just going to stuff my face with a rooster roll while you tell me what yours is. Stuff whatever you want.

We'll jump into the first idjim of the show. Is it just me or... Jesus. That went on for quite a while. Sorry. Bradley gets carried away sometimes. I know. I pay him too. I voiceover guy. Go again.

Pay him too. That's good energy. Is it just me or? Nice and classic. Do two minute noodles take so much longer than two minutes to actually make? Yeah, I usually allow a solid 2.30. Oh, I will. I have two minute noodles a lot on the show that I do at radio at night because I can't cook.

I'm here late. I don't have much time in between songs. Can barely poo, let alone go and make myself a meal. It's true. What do you mean barely poo? Like you were tempted, but you only give 50%? Like I don't get it. Well, I've done that before.

What is it? I don't, what? Sorry, I'm bogged down on that. Bogged? Don't say that. I do half poo. It's not, that's not the, it's not the answer. While you're there, you may as well get it over and done with.

No, because I hear, I know, I've got Shakira and then I've got Rihanna. And then so I'll poo during Shakira, then I'm like, I'll wipe during Rihanna. But sometimes, you know, there's a lot more volume than expected. So it will take too long. So I'll have to sort of get as, do a good as job as I can. Anyway, that's not why I'm talking. Carry on. Two minute noodles do not, do not take two minutes to cook.

For some reason, everyone's just universally accepted that it's false advertising. Exactly. No one cares. And I made two-minute noodles on my show, and this is what made me think of it. And I dove straight in, put the seasoning in, and then I dove in when I drained the little water off it. So you left it for two minutes. Two minutes.

Actually two minutes. Actually two minutes. Well, here. Because I know, right? Left it for two minutes, and I go Actually two minutes. Actually two minutes. Well, here. Because I know, right? Left it for two minutes and I go to eat and half of the strands are still hard. They're still raw. That's not on. So then I thought, well, why don't I go to the website and see what they say?

Of course you thought that. I wanted a bit more substance in this. Just use common sense and cook them a bit longer. They've got a whole FAQ section. Didn't you know FAQ? F-A-Q. Yes. Frequently Asked Question.

I had no idea that's what it meant. Really? Yep. What did you think it was? Fact. What's a fact? I thought that was a word. Get fact.

I thought fact was like a word. It's frequently asked question. There you go. Now I know. And one of them is, why the fuck does it take more than two minutes to cook two minute noodles? Correct. Someone says it takes me longer than two minutes to make the noodles. What am I doing wrong?

And they said, our advice is as follows. Here's a couple. One, invest in a pressure cooker. Now, Magi, here's the thing. If you're making two-minute noodles, you're in a very certain point in your life where, A, you can't afford a pressure cooker. You're in a certain mindset where you can't be bothered. Yep.

Three, you probably don't even know what a pressure cooker is. Yeah. I don't know. My uncle uses that expression. I actually don't know. He's like, oh, this family dinner's like a pressure cooker. What does that even mean? No idea.

They said you can pressure cook it for a minute and it actually cuts it in half. Don't try and pretend you're doing us a favour. Then they said you can boil 200 mils of water on a stovetop and add the noodles in and the boiling water will do it quicker than microwaved or in the microwave or just jug water. Like real boiled on a flame will cook it quicker. No! Too much effort. You don't need utensils.

Also, I've just operated on the assumption that a kettle does boil water to boiling point. Exactly right. What the hell? Why does it not? Yeah, that's my point. It goes on forever. Anyway, I found a forum on Reddit and someone says... How deep in this investigation did you go?

Do you not have more happening in your life? No, no, no. This really got me. So this is, has anyone successfully sued Magi for its claim of two-minute noodles when it clearly takes longer than that? You're kidding. No, no, no, no, no, no. And someone says, yes, I've taken it to the district attorney. What?

And they are yet to respond. That was only a couple of days ago. So clearly this is topical. So I'm going to wait. Oh my God. I'm going to wait for a response. Anyway, Magi, going down. You should follow these idiots online.

Search couple of Mitches. You're listening to Is It Just Me? And now I'm hungry and you're still party eating every chance you get. Of course I am. They haven't offered me any yet. The Red Rooster protest is on the way, people. I'll tell you all about it. The only thing I will eat from Red Rooster is the pineapple fritters.

They're my absolute favourite. Oh, I've got some if you want them. Some? Yeah, chuck it. Here. Do you not like the chippies? Oh, my God. No, the chips are good, but chips are chips.

Like, you can't get a pineapple fritter anywhere. You want a pineapple fritter at midnight on a Thursday? You go to Red Rooster. Have you ever had one of these? Yeah, of course I have. I'm a massive Red Rooster fanboy. That's why I'm putting on this big song and dance today. It's like deep fried ice cream at a Chinese restaurant.

I just need a minute. Where's the tissue? Oh, it's disgusting. Very greasy. Okay. Halloween coming up. Very exciting. Red Rooster's coming up.

You ready to jump into your region? Yes. Let's get into my, is it just me? Is it just me? Or? Would you have absolutely no qualms dating someone who's married? So I would be dating someone who is married to someone else? Yes.

Now, I know this is going to send your head into a bit of a spin because you're very needy and paranoid when it comes to exes and relationships and stuff like that. That's not true. But hear me out, because I was watching The Bachelorette. Oh, well, there's your first problem. I'm a little bit behind. This is old news for some people. But Angie Kent, our current Bachelorette.

Who I love, from Gogglebox. Yes, correct. She was on a date with Carlin. Yeah? Carlin was his name. Sounds like a baby from 2019. Carlin with a Z in the middle. Yes, Carlin. Anyway, she the middle. Yes, Carlin.

Anyway, she was on a date with Carlin and they're setting this bombshell up. Like it's going to be absolutely explosive. Right. This is what happened. I am married. Okay. We've been apart for a year and a half. So we're chatting and then all of a sudden

Colin dropped a huge truth bomb right in my face. You know, so we filed for divorce and stuff and I suppose that's sort of just the last stage of that. So it hasn't been final yet. They haven't even finalised the divorce. Holy dooly. It just really made me start thinking, you know, are you ready?

Are you here for the right reasons? Sometimes we do crazy things when we're trying to get over somebody. Jesus. Very dramatic, right? Yeah, holy dooly. All that stuff. I know in the heart rate monitor in the background. I know, exactly. Sounded like I was on RBT. Beep, beep, boop, beep, boop, boop, beep, boop, beep, boop, beep, holy dog. All that stuff. I know in the heart rate monitor in the background. I know, exactly.

Sounded like I was on RBT. Very unnecessary if you ask me because when I heard, oh, he's still currently technically married, he's not officially divorced yet and starting to date again, I was like, that sounds completely normal to me because my mother, her first husband, she married when she was only 18. Turned out to be a massive mistake. Right. Obviously. That country life.

No, this is when she was still in the city. Really? She's a city girl, yeah. Oh, sorry. How dare I, Jane? Yeah. Oh, sorry. And it didn't work out.

Apparently, he didn't treat her overly nicely. Amen. Get out of there, Jane. How you can be married to my Janie, babe, and not realise you're the luckiest person in the world is beyond me. Sucker. But anyway, she got out of there, and by and not realise you're the luckiest person in the world is beyond me. Sucker. But anyway, she got out of there,

and by the time she started dating Ian, my father, the second husband, she wasn't officially divorced yet. Right. She was still technically married to the first husband, and Ian didn't care. So you're an offspring of this exact situation. Yeah, so when they were acting like it's this massive bombshell with these absurd sound effects, I was like, calm down, it's not that bad.

I feel like if you add this sound effect to anything, it's going to instantly make something sound more extreme than it actually is. Yeah, exactly. Oh my God, Mitch, I'm eating red rooster right now. I just started typing, there's grease on my keyboard. You know what I'm saying? Yeah, I know exactly what you mean. It's so unnecessary to build it up as though it's such a big thing.

Yeah. People fall in and out of love. Whatever, that happens. Yeah. I don't know why she's like tripping out. Do you think that she had any involvement in that being as dramatic as it was or they told her to make it dramatic? I mean, you know what these reality shows are like.

They're heavily produced and edited. But even then, what makes the producers and editors think that that's something that's such a bombshell? I bet all the people at home were being like, oh, that's shocking. He's not even divorced yet. That's not okay. And it's like, it happens.

Like, you have to be separated for ages before you can officially get a divorce. Imagine being the editor in the editing booth, being like, this will be great. We can use the sound effects, Tim. We can put the new ones that you made over Christmas. We'll use them here. Holy dooly.

She said holy dooly. Oh, Wigprout, the big sound effect. It's extreme. But to me, it doesn't seem that extreme. No, it doesn't at all. Well, you and I often have dramatic moments with each other. I don't know what you mean. I'm perfectly rational at all times.

I feel like this needs to be on text time. Mitch has just texted me. Hold on. But I just don't like the idea of people like my mother who have been in that situation sitting at home being made to feel bad by sound effects like this. Oh, I guess I'm just a slut then. It's like, no, it's normal to fall in and out of love occasionally.

You know, these things happen. Yeah, exactly right. And this doesn't happen in real life. The only place that this situation happens is on TV shows. You don't go to Coles. You go, I'll just get my flybys. Sorry, my flybys buzzer is broken. Like, it's just, it doesn't happen.

Do you know what I mean? Absolutely. Imagine that. Turned up to church on a Sunday. Oh, I've got my donation. Donations, donations. The collection plate. The collection plate.

Sorry, let me get my wallet. Oh, no, I've left it in the car. Get out of this church! You're listening to Is It Just Me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. Can't think of anything nice to say? Just hit five stars and tell them why you'd rather be buried or cremated. God, I'll tell you what, you'll be bloody buried soon

with the amount of bloody fat going into your system. Every sound effect I've played on today's show, you've taken it as an opportunity to shove your face full of Red Rooster. It's getting cold. Of course it is, but wait for the end of the show. Oh God, I can feel the hiccups coming because I tried to eat it so quickly. I can see a thin layer of grease on your lips forming.

And salt. That's disgusting. Red Rooster chips, I'm sorry, better than KFC, better than Macca's. They're up there. KFC have the best chips. We can agree on that. Rubbish. They do.

KFC do. You're a real Red Rooster fan, especially considering they've been put to rest. Well, that's exactly why I've been eating Red Rooster out of protest today. I'm finally ready to reveal the reason. Oh, God. So, I saw an article this week that really upset me. It said, Red Rooster looks to be in dire straits as seven more stores suddenly closed down. The branches in Queensland were put into voluntary administration with over 100 staff losing their job.

Now, here's the killer. There are fears more stores are on the chopping block as the fast food company struggles to compete and stay up to date with changing consumer preferences. I don't know why consumers' preferences are changing. You can't beat this shit. You don't need to change. This is chicken, though. Yeah, but listen. Listen.

Are you chewing? Yeah. All these stores are shutting down at such a rapid rate. Yes. None of New South Wales stores have closed down, but all these ones in Queensland, it does herald the end of Red Rooster as we know it. It does. It could be gone.

You don't know. Now, I am not – there was never a Red Rooster in my neighbourhood growing up, so it wasn't something I had. But I felt for you, being a country boy, you know, Red Rooster for you was like Lobster Mornay for me growing up. It is. I know. I agree.

That was the weirdest thing about me moving to the city because back in the country, Red Rooster is considered just as good as all the other fast foods, like Macca's and KFC. Right. And then I moved to the god-awful city of Sydney, and the amount of idiots that have said to me, I've never had Red Rooster. I was so shocked. I thought it was normal for everyone.

So now that it could be gone... But why have Red Rooster when you can have a porto with peri-peri and a prego sauce? Because it's Red Rooster. This shit is the best. Well, you know what? This just goes to show how good a friend I am. I've been up all night watching YouTube tutorials about how to make a rooster roll.

Yes, you've tried to comfort me somehow. Because I thought if I can get you a recipe that you can replicate at home, even though there's no Red Roosters left, you'll still be able to enjoy the taste of whatever the shit that is that you claim is good. It's like when people build, like, forts. You know, like, we're preparing for the worst.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like, if Red Rooster, heaven forbid, does shut down in New South Wales, I will get some comfort out of knowing that you've taught me how to DIY at home. Yeah, my grandfather used to say, you know, we used to make bomb shelters in the playground, raid shelters. Did you ever get bombed? He's like, no, no, we played in them.

So this is just a safety, this is a backup. You're teaching me how to make a Red Rooster roll. Raid shelters. Did you ever get bombed? He's like, no, no. We played in them. So this is just a safety. This is a backup. You're teaching me how to make a red rooster roll. You've got an actual rooster roll there to go off. I like to do a little taste test as well. But I've been to Coles. Hang on. Sorry.

My mouth is full. Have you not had a red rooster roll? I've never had a rooster roll in my life. Bullshit. No, but I want to wait until then. You never mentioned that. I've never had one. The red rooster roll is essentially a bread roll with chicken, like barbecue chicken, bit of stuffing in there, and mayonnaise.

Like a rotisserie chicken. It doesn't sound complex, but they must do something special. Hormones. Because it's just heaven. I hope you don't mind my raw fingers because I've just bought them. Oh my God. It's fine. We're fine.

Look at you, little Nigella over there. You've got quite the set up. It's like a cooking tutorial, all right? At home Red Rooster Roll. The billowing breast. She uses alliteration. Bustling. With brown, salty skin.

I just can't believe people who have access to Red Rooster that still haven't tried it. Like, what are you doing? I thought this was the nicest thing I've ever done for you. Yeah, look at you. To be fair, I was inconsolable. You're like, it's fine, it's fine. You were! We can prepare for the worst.

This is a very good chicken too. Now, show me the roll. Do they stuff it or is it stingy? I reckon it's stingy. I thought you were watching YouTube tutorials, mate. Look, there you go. I have watched YouTube tutorials, but they've got a real one in front of us. It's chock-a-block, darling.

Look at that. Oh, God. There's a lot of chicken in that. Okay. That's why they go on redundant. They're putting a whole breast per roll. Yeah, exactly. You wouldn't get that kind of treatment at McDonald's.

I thought you said seven stores have been closed. I'm like, so all of them? Hey. I don't think there's many. All right, so I've put the chicken in the bowl, and I'm adding some mayonnaise. Now, in the tutorial, he suggests full whole egg mayonnaise because there's no recipe online.

It's like KFC. I would expect nothing less. Seven secret herbs and spices. Mayonnaise with salt and pepper. So I'm putting in the mayo. Now this... Oh, God, that's all. That's rank.

How much do you reckon? Yeah, a good amount. It looks like there's plenty. That's quite coded. Now, this is actually interesting because I thought that it was going to be really straightforward. Chicken on a bun, bit of mayo, you're all good. But you're mixing the chicken in with the mayo in a bowl separately. Yes.

Oh, shit, you're already more advanced than me. This is what they do because open your dry bun. That's what they do. The chicken is embedded with the sauce. It's all one globular texture. Oh, it is. Oh, that's a bit gross. There you go.

When you peel it apart, it's a bit gross, isn't it? This is awful. I'm going to add some more moisture. Oh, I can see my reflection in the grease. That's the kind of chicken sandwich I like. Make that your Tinder bio. Take a photo of it. That'd be great.

Hold on. This is the texture you want. The guy said you want it to stick to the side of the bowl in the tutorial. Ready? That ranks. That is awful. Christ. I'm going to just try this quickly.

Oh, no. Don't chew into the microphone. That's good stuff. All right. Christ I'm going to just try this quickly Oh no Don't chew into the microphone That's good stuff Alright I got a hot dog bun Real fake Oh my god Fake looking bun

It actually kind of does look like the red rooster roll It took me so long to find them The guy in the video Hot dog bun of course He was rural too One of your kind And he said to me What did he say to me?

I don't know him He said on YouTube He didn't talk to me He said to me, what did he say to me? I don't know him. He said on YouTube. He didn't talk to me. He said on YouTube, he only has an IGA in his area, poor thing. So he only had- I thought about IGA. Yeah, but he couldn't get these type of buns that were fake and buttery. He couldn't only get the real, you know, stone, earth-baked country buns.

I hate those buns. The ones that feel like they're going to cut the roof of your mouth when you bite into them. Yeah, and they get between your teeth and they stay there for days. If anyone whips those out at a sausage sizzle, dead to me. Look at this. This is what you want. Sweet, like full of preservatives. I'm just going to layer it on.

It's pretty simple. It never occurred to me that they use something similar to a hot dog bun. I'm showing the camera. It's just mayo. It's just chicken. It's salty. It's delicious. Hot dog bun.

You mix around the chicken with some mayo. Bob's your uncle. Robert's your mother's brother. You know what the chicken with some mayo. Bob's your uncle. Robert's your mother's brother. You know what? My grandfather's name's Bob. So all my family go, Bob's your uncle. He's your granddad. Shut up, Cherie.

My grandma's divorced him. She's like, that's not your uncle. That's me ex. That's our grandfather. Please don't say that. It never occurred to me that grandparents split up. I just thought, but old people just don't, even if they hate each other's guts. No, I've got a step-grandma.

Really? Yeah, and she's 20 years younger than my grandfather. That's fascinating. Yeah, yeah. She's lovely and her name's Kathleen. Wouldn't listen to this. Oh, she might. Hi, Kathleen.

Oh, this looks really good. Piss off. It actually looks like a rooster roll. Here we go. It's split in the middle, but that's okay. It just means it's made with love. Have a look at this. Oh, he's showing it to the camera.

Ah, all right. Do you want me to bring it over to you? Please, all right. Very similar. I have to say, I've done very well for myself. I have to say, the hot dog bun that you've gotten, although it looks very similar, it's just not moist enough. I should have done that.

I don't know what red... Now that I think about it, that's a bit disturbing that the bun they use has got a lot of, yeah, it is, it's soggy. Maybe it's because they steam it, but

yours is dry as all shit. Probably. They probably, um, probably dip them. Okay, I'm about to do the taste test. Okay, so take a

bite. Oh, we could have done a blind tasting. You'd know straight away. I'd be able to tell them apart,

darling. I'm a red rooster fan. Take a bite of the chicken, the original chicken roll. Oh, the OG red rooster. Oh, I think it's rooster away. I'd be able to tell them apart, darling. I'm a Red Rooster fan. Take a bite of the chicken, the original chicken roll. The OG Red Rooster. I think it's Rooster Roll. I keep saying Red Rooster Roll.

It looks like a... Why does the bun look like a shiitake mushroom? It's wet and glistening like it's rubbery. So it should be. Why is yours not? Sorry. Here's my one that I made. All right, Mitchell's DIY rip-off Rooster Roll. Hold on. I want Sorry. Here's my one that I made.

Mitchell's DIY rip-off rooster roll. Hold on. I want to make this as dramatic as possible, please. Wait there. Wait there. I'll get you a drone. What? Just like a dramatic drone. Oh, you and your sound effects, mate.

Sorry. Oh, okay. It was meant for your drone. Okay. Just like The Bachelorette music. Here's my part. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Oh, no. Sorry? No. What? No. What do you bun. Yeah. Oh, no. Sorry? No. What? No. What do you mean? Hold on. It just, sorry, I know that you're trying to do your best, but it just tastes so homemade.

Oh. Like, oh, it's dry as. Really? What can I do to fix it? Why does that chicken taste like tuna? Does it need more mayo? Possibly. Or just maybe you get one of those spray bottles so that it's just a bit moist.

I don't know how to make the bread soggy like Red Rooster do. It's oil. I'm sorry. That just tastes homemade. But it tastes like it's missing the coleslaw. There's no coleslaw in it. I know, but it tastes like something that you would eat with coleslaw at a barbecue. Okay.

Can I try it? It's so dry and absolutely no good. Somehow that chicken tastes like tuna. I don't know how you've managed that one. Here you go. Handing it over to you. Thank you. See what I mean?

Tastes like something you'd have at a barbecue or a picnic. Oh, yeah, that Auntie Julie had made. She does the best, Auntie Julie. She gets a barbecue chook and a bit of bread and that's lunch, kids. Don't complain. You need a drink with this or it will get stuck in your throat. It's so dry. I'll give this to my cousin who's lunch, kids. Don't complain. You need a drink with this or it will get stuck in your throat. It's so dry. I'll give this to my cousin

who's a labourer and use it as gyprock paste and put together a house. Okay, alright. I'll try the red rooster. Rooster roll. Is there stuffing on these? I think there is.

Yeah, there's a bit. That's what the YouTuber didn't include. I have to go back and dislike his video. Here we go. You've had a bite. Is that moisture from your lips? No. This roll is dripping in moisture Right?

I don't know how they do it It's almost like they left it out in the dew Does your grass not get dew on it? Oh, dew, yeah This is good I'm telling you You can't beat This is why I'm so upset

The Red Rooster Even though there's, you know There's no announcement or expectation It'll close down in New South Wales But it's dark days for them Yeah, this is great This is why I'm so upset that Red Rooster, even though there's no announcement or expectation of a close down in New South Wales, but it's dark days for them. This is why I'm so worried. If they're gone from my life, I have nothing to replace it with. You're not wrong, because I'm not helping out. Your shit show was absolutely no good.

You're listening to Is It Just Me? A podcast by a couple of midges. God, I thought I was doing you a favour. Thought I was helping out. I just want to make my point known through this protest that Red Rooster deserves better. Alright? If you haven't tried it, go out and try it and let me know what you think.

Something actually horrific to happen in your life. Or a real protest. I clearly don't have much going on. I know, come away for a real cause. What about same-sex marriage? You didn't even bat an eyelid. What do you mean? You didn't do a thing.

Why are you saying that? Because I'm saying you put so much time and effort into the Red Rooster campaign and you barely voted yes. I went to all the fucking marriage equality protests. Where were you? In the closet. It's very bold of you to assume that I didn't do anything for marriage equality. What did you do?

I did a lot. You were probably a no voter at the time. You are a freshie. Fuck off! I shouldn't have made a joke. You do help my community. And I did too, but at the time it was with my girlfriend. So it was very different.

Really? Anyway! But between marriage equality and Red Rooster, those are the two causes close to my heart. If there was a Venn diagram of the two things that you loved, chicken and cock. Alright, well, cock and cock. So, let's move on to, in a of days, it is going to be Halloween. I thought we're sorry. I'm just finishing off my Red Rooster.

The show's not even over. It is Halloween and I love a theme. I love getting dressed up. I love Christmas. My favorite time of the year. And this is a challenge that I saw trending. It was on the Zach Sang show and then Z100 in New York. Did a lot of radio stations are doing it.

It basically, jack-o'-lanterns, you know, big pumpkins, right? It's very American, you know, shout out to our American viewer. Got one at the moment. So what I've done is I've gone and got us two jack-o'-lanterns. Now I've actually chosen them. It took me about 20 minutes at the grocery store. I was going to go over and get them. Really?

Yeah. Because I chose them based on our head sizes. Our head sizes. Oh, so one's gigantic, that's you. And the other one's elongated and imperfect. Elongated and imperfect. Wow, okay. I've got you a full tray. Okay, so I'm sensing that we're going to be

doing the carving, right? Correct. So the challenge is... You love a DIY today, don't you? I know, you're not wrong. I spend a lot of money at Coles. This feels like the living room. How to make chicken rolls. My Miguel impression. Okay, so we have two minutes on the clock to make... Two minutes?

Two minutes, yeah. I don't know what I'm doing. I thought you were going to show me. Exactly right. I'm not showing you jack shit. Please tell me. Oh, it's heavy. Please tell me this pumpkin's bloody...

Let's drop them at the same time. Okay, three, two's heavy. It's very... Yeah, hold on. Please tell me this pumpkin's bloody... Let's drop them at the same time. Okay, three, two, one. Oh! Broken it? Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. We've broken it. No, stop, stop. The light's back.

Oh! Oh, my God. That was not good. That was bad. I think something snapped over there. Oh! No! Oh!

I was like Fukushima. You cannot do that again. Shit. Are these even hollow? Please tell me you didn't just buy fucking pumpkins. No, I walked straight into Coles and they had Halloween pumpkins. Oh, okay, good. And I'll buy them.

So I've got, you've got a couple of utensils. Number one, a rolling pin. What's that for? Well, that's to, if you want to go kind of creepy and go like a brain oozing, you know what I mean? You could do like a blunt force trauma on the top. This is used. It's got cookie dough on it. I stole it from the work kitchen. Filth. You've also got a paring knife. Very sharp. Be careful.

This is for fine carvings or indents. You've got a sharpie. You can draw stuff out and a spoon to scoop the guts out. Have you ever made a jack-o'-lantern before? One of these Halloween carving pins? I have, I have, yes. So you're at an advantage. Years ago when I was a kid. Okay, so we're basically going to, we've got a two-minute timer, did you say?

Yeah, two-minute timer. Do you want to mark out your sketch first? Because I actually thought I might do you. Oh, you're going to do one of me? Yeah. Well, then why have you got the big pumpkin? Yeah, we should actually do each other. All right.

It's like a portrait. This is cute. Yeah. Carve me like one of your French fat fucks. Here you go. Fuck off. All right. All right.

So let's, I'll get you some drawing music. Hold on. I didn't know there was such a thing as drawing music. Oh, we can make it happen. Yeah. What makes you think this is drawing music? This is calming. What else?

Would you want something else? So am I trying to make this accurate? Because I thought the eyes that you carve are like big triangles. Art is meant to be whatever you want it to be. You can do a sort of cartoon version of me. This music sounds like we're at a funeral. All right, I'm doing the carving. Okay. And then so we have a two minute timer to actually carve the bastard. Yes, you're doing the drawing, you mean? Huh? You're doing the drawing? Yeah, right now. Yeah, you're not carving. Yeah, good. Okay. Can you give me a look?

Can you look towards me? I haven't said this before, but you are beautiful. Oh, thank you. It's fine. You're covered in a thin layer of sweat right now. Okay. Your eye is beady like a rat. I beg your pardon.

Can we get rid of this violin music? Yeah, it's awful. Thank you so much, Andrea. That's enough. All right. I don't know how I'm going to do the hair. I'm going to work it out. Are you ready?

Because I've come very prepared for Halloween. I've got everything you'd ever need. What do you mean? Well, with the timer. It's fully prepared. I've prepared everything in advance. So two minutes on the clock to carve this pumpkin and try and make it look like each other.

Correct. So if anything, you just don't have to touch yours. And it's bang on. Looks just like me. Are you ready? Yeah. Potential's in hand. Yep.

All right. I'm going to start the timer in three, two, one. Happy Halloween. Ooh. Okay. Ooh. This timer is very, like, making it sound like it's more intense than it is. It's like The Bachelorette all over again.

Yeah, it is. Oh, my God. It's not The Bachelorette all over again. Yeah, it is. Oh, my God. It's not. Don't rush. Don't hurt yourself. Don't hurt yourself. I've only got two minutes. So what you should do is you should cut and then you should.

Far out. This is not easy. It's all right. Oh, my God. The timer will help you. How? It's making me so nervous. Oh, God.

It's not even hollow. Both of my Oh, God! It's not even hollow! Both of my eyes are out. It's not even hollow. There's pumpkin guts all through it. Yuck! Just like me. I hate pumpkin. Yeah. There's not actual contents in there.

Just a lot of muck and goo. That's like your brain. Your nose looks like Voldemort. Hey. Not intentionally. Oh, right. I's like your brain. Your nose looks like Voldemort. Hey. Not intentionally. Oh, right. I was like, excuse me. One minute left.

What for the love of God was that? Just a voiceover that I did earlier. That was you? Yeah, that was me. That was my count impression from Sesame Street. Ah! Oh!

How are you going? I flicked the pumpkin all over my shirt. I'm trying to find... Oh, dear, oh, dear. I'm changing utensils. What? What are you doing?

Why are you bashing me? Wait, why are you using that instead of a knife? Just trust me. I don't. Oh, shit, we don't have much time left. What? Oh, I hate this challenge. 30 seconds left.

What? You heard the man. Peace off. Don't make him mad. Oh. Oh, this is really difficult. My wrist is so sore. Whoa, flashback. What?

Nothing. Flashback to when? Nothing. Oh, then I think it's us. No. No, definitely not us. Absolutely not. Ten seconds.

Fuck. Gotta get your hair. I can't get it out. Oh, God. I'm going to bash it with the thing. No. Okay. No. Okay. No.

It's stuck. No! God, that was very dramatic. Yeah, why did you do that to me? My heart rate's way up. Oh. Tell you what. I mean, you've had fresh pumpkin before.

It's delicious. No, it's rank. I hate pumpkin in general. All right. On three, turn, and it should be like looking into a mirror. One, two, three. A. You've made me look really cranky. Listeners at home, that is a very good impression. See, what I was trying to do here

was I was going to cut the mouth out and then repurpose that bit of pumpkin as your quiff. But it fell in when I was trying to cut it out. And so true to life, much like you would with food in your mouth, refusing to let go of it. You're clinging onto that food for dear life like it's the most precious thing you've ever encountered. It won't come out.

That's not a bad thing. Oh, no, it's out. Ready? Oh, that looks good. Do it. You have my permission. The pumpkin shit actually looks like, oh my God. You have my permission. There we go. That actually looks a lot like me. You've got a quiff. All right, quickly run the people through what it's out. Ready? Oh, my God. Oh, that looks good. Do it. You have my permission. The pumpkin shit actually looks like, oh, my God. You have my permission.

There we go. That actually looks a lot like me. You've got a quiff. All right, quickly run the people through what it looks like. It's an audio medium. I just explained that. And also, this is going to be up on our Instagram and Facebook, right? Yeah, yes.

Search at a couple of Mitches. Now, the thing is, I think you've lost points because there's just no no's. And I've got quite a prominent button. I didn't get to it. Well, I've gotten to everything. I'll start mine. What I've done for yours is I tried to emulate your sort of dead behind the eye look. You know what I mean?

Sort of... I beg your pardon. Just sort of cold, cold demeanour. Okay, sure. But beautiful and warm on the inside. That's the point. Stop working on... I guess you can.

We're done now. What I've done for you is the high eye bones. Did you see that you've got like cheekbones quite high? That's why I've made your eyes quite high up. You've got quite high cheekbones. That's a compliment. Sadly, the haggard smile is true to life. There's a scowl that's sort of set in stone,

constant day by day, Monday through Sunday. I don't look thrilled there, do I? No, you really don't. The nose isn't accurate. It's a bit big. But I think, overall, we'll let Instagram decide. What? Who won? Oh, it's pretty clear, we'll let Instagram decide. What? Who won?

Oh, it's pretty clear to both of us who won. Not me. Yes. Mine looks like mine's woeful. Yeah, it's not the best. You've done two DIYs today, two Mitch Turi tutorials, and both have been epic fails. You literally choked on the rooster roll, and this looks like roadkill. Well, I hope you're proud of yourself.

Well, I am proud of myself. I'm happy with this effort. Okay. We should go, though. Okay, we'll put these on our Instagram, at couple of Mitch's. We'll put both of them up. You can compare.

You can vote on there. Hey, it's been a real pleasure. What a great show. Very DIY-y. Happy Halloween to that. You've got guts all over your hands. I do. I don't like this at all.

I've got, between the red rooster and the pumpkins, I've just covered in remnants. Also, I've lent on the desk here to sort of move my body weight up, and I feel like we broke something when we dropped the two pumpkins. It's rickety. The desk here in Kyle and Jackie O's radio studio is now teetering. Yeah, not good. Maybe next week on the show, that can be your DIY, how to repair the studio. Okay, I'll watch some DIY YouTube tutorials. Good, good. next week on the show that can be your DIY. How to repair the studio. Okay, I'll watch some

DIY YouTube tutorials. Good, good. Next week on the show my delivery should be here. So I got a notification if this is a... Oh, bullshit. This is a throwback

to episode one or two. I can't even remember. I think it's two. It's been a running thing on the show here because in episode one I told you that I have a tape measure

from AliExpress that only cost me was it 52 cents? Yeah, it was 53 or 52 cents. And I said, my question was, how the hell did that make anyone money? Because 52 cents including postage, that's literally, it would have cost way more than that to make the tape measure.

Surely everyone's at a loss. And then you said you could find something even cheaper than that. And I have. Rubbish. But there's something wrong. What is it? I've been sent some notifications from the company that are posting it, and there are some weird things in it.

It's very odd. Some weird things in the package? No, in the notifications. They're saying, your order of value dot, dot, dot, and it's a lot higher than I paid. Oh. Yeah. Are you even sure that this is?

I haven't opened it. I haven't touched it. And I'm going to bring it in and let you open it, because I think you're going to love it. You're actually going to enjoy it. Okay, how big's the package? Like, is it something functional for 39 cents? You are going... I think this will be one of the best presents

you've ever received in your life. The only clue you gave me was that I have one of these in my bedroom, but this is the car version of that. And I've been looking around my bedroom for weeks on end. That's how long it's taken to post this shit. And I cannot find anything. You're like, hey, Siri, can you get car dildos? No.

Oh, no. She's listening. I don't have an answer for that. As well as that, next week on the show, I'm going to be bringing back Talkback Ting. Yes. This is where I bring the little bits of gold that I overhear when I'm listening to Talkback Radio. Yeah.

This time, it's the John Laws special. Oh, that'll be good. This time. He's been in radio longer than dinosaurs have been extinct. And he's quite a cranky bastard at times. He's prone to a bit of an outburst. And we're going to be listening to some of them, all right? That'll be fun.

All right. Episode seven. You'll catch us there. Leave us a review, of course. You guys, they're coming in hot and heavy. We appreciate it. Five stars keeps us on the air. Absolutely. Not on the air. But we'll be back next week. Leave us a review, of course. You guys, they're coming in hot and heavy. We appreciate it. Five stars keeps us on the air. Absolutely.

Not on the air. But we'll be back next week. That's a good point, actually. Does this count as being on the air? Because it's not actually broadcast. It's on the stream. We're in the cloud. Yeah, yeah.

We should coin that for the podcast world. We're on the cloud. We should. And in your back announce or something like that, you should be like, Mitch and Mitch on the cloud. I love that. We've got t-shirts made and everything. All right. Back next week on the cloud. I love that. We'll get t-shirts made and everything. All right.

Back next week on the cloud. Leave us a review and we'll see you then. Oh, God. We're going to be back on the cloud next week. Sounds like we're doing heroin. Man, we'll get back on the cloud next week. Oh, brah. Pass us some more of the cloud.

Shit, man. Where'd you get that cloud from, dude? Anyway. See you then. We should go. See ya. Bye. Is it just me?

Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. Okay. This is our secret segment, everyone. Welcome. I hope to God anyone that's listened to the secret segment before hasn't told anyone about it. So how this works is we just pop in after the show is officially wrapped and we just talk shit aimlessly, nothing planned, nothing structured. And my hope is that no one listens because I worry that it's going

to influence their opinion on the show overall. Yeah. But this happens to be your favourite segment. Well, the rules are that you cannot review us based on this segment unless it's good. Yes. So that's how it works. If you're leaving a rating on the podcast,

it has to be based on the actual show. I mean, if you enjoy this more. I do this at the start of every ADD Brief. I have to press the... Yes, it's called ADD Brief because we both have an inability to focus. And we just debrief on things that this show is, you know, we plan content ahead of time.

Believe it or not, a lot of this we discuss at length. These pumpkins didn't just grow. Exactly right. And this is where we get to debrief, talk about some personal stuff it's all very fun you get to know us

a bit more I don't know if it's that personal we usually just carry on like idiots that's us though that is us that's so personal

there's a button I've got to press you know what it is hold on let me just find it there we go that just activated the live tweets

that come in during the show oh we got one already you know what as soon as we turned it on the tweets flied through hot and heavy. We've got two!

Surely at some point you're going to stop finding this gag funny, the fact that you can't live tweet a podcast while we're recording because it's not broadcasting live. No one's hearing this except us right now. I have explained this to you countless times. People tweet at us 24-7 in the hopes that we are on, and these people just have caught us at a good time. Gladys Berejiklian!

Shout out, girl! Love the light rail. We'll read one out. So, we've got a couple going on. Matt Tatat. Matt Tatat, which I think is a Pokemon reference for Ratatat. Matt, let us know. Matt says, Hey fellas! Ijem for

Tury to read out. When did I... Are you not making this one up? No, none of them are made up, but no, this one you can see on my phone. Oh, look, this actually came through on our Twitter. This is a real one. Please send it. He says, Matty Tatat. Matty Tatat.

Matty Tatat. Oh, yeah, of course. Okay. Matty Tatat. Follow me. Very nice guy. Followed him back. Very handsome.

Hey, fellas, Ijem for Tury to read out. Is it just me or does Mitchell Coombs have the most delightful and relatable pitchy and lispy voice that you can listen to all day? Subscribe. Oh, that's sweet. First of all, you can tell he's listened to a couple of episodes. I love that. But also, it is just you.

What a kiss ass. That's sweet, though. What was it again? He said the most pitchy. Well, he called you lispy. I have a lisp. Like that's just saying the obvious. True.

I guess that's like calling me handsome. He says, does Mitchell Coombs have the most delightful and relatable pitchy and lispy voice that you can listen to all day? Well, fuck, what am I? Just toad? Oh, how sweet. Jesus. You've got a radio voice.

People have heard your voice a million times. Graham, Graham. I'm pitchy and lispy apparently. Your voice is different, which I like, which I really enjoy. Oh, well, that's very sweet, Matt. Thank you very much. Yeah. I've got another voice a million times. I'm Graham. I'm Graham. I'm pitchy and lispy, apparently. Your voice is different, which I like, which I really enjoy. Oh, well, that's very sweet, Matt. Thank you very much. Yeah. I've got another one coming through.

Is this the same Matt that asked us to give a birthday shout out? I think so, yes. This one? Yeah, well, happy 35th birthday, Matt. There you go. Shit, Matt! Fuck! Why are you panicked about his age so much?

I hope he's got super in line. 35 is not that old. No, in 2019. In 2019? What? Now that you can't claim all the room. I think that's great, don't you? Well, thanks, Matt.

Thank you for complimenting my voice. It used to be something I was insecure about, but not anymore. I've edited my own work too much. We love you, Matty. I'm just numb to my voice. Thank you for listening. I think you've got a very unique voice, and this is normally where the co-host would respond to a compliment.

Me? With another one, yeah. That's not how it works. Someone wrote in fan mail for me. I don't have to fucking write it for you. Well, I'll have you know, but I've got fan mail too. Go on. I've got one more.

From Sophs12321, which is not made up. That's actually her name. Oh, okay. She says, oh, we've got requests, which I think is very exciting because it was the first sound effect request. And you and Jenna and the team and the listeners, everyone sort of made me feel so self-conscious. Oh, the sound effects are stupid. They're dumb.

Well, I've got sound effect requests. And ladies and gentlemen. I forgot you asked for them. Why did you ask for them? Don't encourage him, people. It means that my effect and my influence is working. So, ladies and gentlemen, for the very first IJM sound effect request. It is. That's a cash register.

Who asked for that? I already said her name, remember? Soaps12321. She left it as a review on podcasts. Oh, really? Yeah. Yeah. Oh, I didn't know that you asked people to leave them as a review. I thought you said Twitter. I don't know what I did.

But that's fine. That works. An extra review is an extra review. Do you know that song? It's like, all I want to do is... It's very similar to that. Why are you playing that? That's what the song does.

All I want to do is... But what's that got to do with the cash register? That's what she wants. That's how the song goes. song does. All I want to do is... But what's that got to do with the cash register? That's how the song goes. It goes, all I want to do is... That's the song. Right. Have you not heard it? It's in Slumdog Millionaire.

Well, no, because I'm very confused. Do you think that a machine gun and a cash register is the same thing? Because they don't sound the same. It's very good. Oh, what, do you want me to be PC and get a stun gun? What is that? I don't know why there was a chorus of laughter at the end of it. Oh, what, do you want me to be PC and get a stun gun? Oh! Oh. What is that? I don't know why there was a chorus of laughter at the end of it. You've got to stop playing, like, dark shit in this section of the podcast.

It's not dark! What's something wholesome you did this week? I'm going to lighten the mood. Okay. Because I'm sick of you playing, like, bullets and killing animals and stuff. Well, okay. We'll play something Looney Tunes-esque. Ready?

There you go. That was a bit of fun. I got one more. There's one more request. Oh, really? On podcast. Yes. Hi, Connor H, 1996.

Right. He says, live tweet. I know we're not supposed to include. Yes, he does. Oh, that's so funny. The name of the review gave us five stars. Thanks, Con. He says, hi.

Funny. He's good. I need to get that back. I don't know. Someone delete it. You don't. Hi. I can just record it. Hi. Just move on. I know we're that back. I don't know. Someone delete it. You don't. Hi. I can just record it.

Hi. Just move on. I know we're not supposed to include ADD Brief in the reviews, but Mitch Turi playing with the sound effects gets me every time. That's so nice. Thank you, Con. Yeah, you're going to use that as ammunition to keep doing it. Did you say ammunition?

Aye. Watch out. Get down. Get down. That is so dark. Get down. Sorry. They're blakes. He has a special request. I haven't checked our down. That is so dark. Get down. Sorry. They're blakes.

He has a special request. I haven't checked our reviews. That's so cute. Yeah, we're getting up to 100. I don't know how to spell it, though. Hold on. All right, I got it, Con. Here you go.

His second request for Connor. That's not my choice. Oh, my God. Is that a chimpanzee? No, it's an orangutan. Same thing. Same thing. Different color. There's an orangutan. Same chip. That's what it's requested. Same thing.

Different colour. There you go, Con. Well done. Oh, God, is this how this show is going to work now? People just send you dumb sound effects to annoy me with. I think it's a really good time to mention that every year, 12 orangutans are killed by palm oil. Not the oil themselves.

The oil doesn't get thrown at them. The oil is taken from their trees that they sleep in, live in, celebrate birthdays in. And I just think we need to take a moment to recognise that orangutans are our ancestors. Are you taking the piss out of animal cruelty again? I feel like you've got to steer away from animals. People hate you after that budgie thing. Can I just say, do not turn that on me.

That is true. Palm oil is killing orangutans and I want to bring attention to it. You've never ever brought attention to this. And you played a violin sound effect, so I assume you were taking the piss. Nope, not taking the piss. The sound effect just helped. Okay, you've made your point then. Thank you.

The budgie thing was not me. It was Jenna. For those who don't know what we're talking about, back in episode five, literally the most recent one before this, you were going to get me to do a prank call and I was not allowed to know who that person was until you started dialing already. So I had to like wing it. And then you handed me a poster of a missing budgie and said, this is who we're calling while it was dialing.

And I said, no, absolutely. Abort. Get the fuck out of here. I'd like to clear the air on that because I've had a couple of messages myself. We've gotten a lot of, the responses to that were mixed. People understood your point of view. They thought it was funny. And then other people saw my point of view and were like, that's fucked.

We and I would never have let that go to air. That was never going to go to air. Why did you do it then? Because we knew it would have got the reaction out of you that it did. And it was perfect. It was like taking candy from a baby. I got exactly what I wanted. I think that's a very clever PR spin on your part.

That's a load of shit. But sure, let's move on. We'll say that that was what you wanted to happen. That is what I wanted to happen. I got a message from my next door neighbour, Joanne, back in Bogengate. Yeah. And goes, he clearly doesn't understand the Coombs' love for animals. I'm glad you didn't go ahead with that prank call.

Oh, Joanne. I haven't, I don't want any harm caused against any animals ever. I'm a beautiful animal person and I'm an animal lover. I love that you didn't have to justify that. Yeah, this is ridiculous. If you listen back to basically every show we've done, there's been some sort of reference to like, you've played a gun sound effect and then a cat sound effect or something.

It's just like, let's just steer away from that, please. It's ridiculous. This is not fair. Anyway, like I said, something wholesome that happened from the week to lift the mood away from animals and your hate for them. Okay, so I was sitting in my car. I get a notification and I think, you know what? I'm fine.

This is what happens. I'm driving. I got CarPlay. Driving. That pisses me off. In the middle of a song, you hear like, oh, dance for me, dance for me, dance for me. Oh, oh.

I hate that how CarPlay does that. Do you feel the same? Isn't that what CarPlay's for? Yeah, but I don't want the notification. I don't think mine does do that, actually. It just says on the screen that I've got one. That's what I want, but mine comes up and plays. Just put your phone on silent, idiot.

Is that what it does? I know what silent does, but is it silent the car? I think so, because mine never goes off. There you go, ladies and gentlemen. That is the end of my qualm. That's not wholesome. That's you bitching about you not liking your car, bloody technology, like first world problems.

I can't win when I try to save the orangutans. I can't win when I try to talk about technology. I'm silenced. I feel like Julian Assange. I said, tell me something wholesome that happened in your week, and you said, well, my fucking car play is no good. It's because it's all I had. I got a lovely romantic gesture done for me. Stop it.

You're going to need to, can you delete sound effects after you've used them? Yeah. Because it's not just the sound effects that pisses me off. It's the fact that you have like four. Well, I think. They're not funny anymore. Let's go to the phones. We can take live calls here.

Let's go to Julie. She's hung up. She's not there. She's hung up. That's a shame. But. Enough with the sound effects. That's it. That's Cos to Julie. She's hung up. She's not there. She's hung up. That's a shame. But... Enough with the sound effects. That's Cosentino, the magician.

It is. What the hell does he have to say? He didn't tweet. His rabbit from his act jumped on the phone. And it just sent out a whole bunch of characters. But we have a live call coming through. I want you just to believe that we have the option to take live calls. Hello?

What was that? That was just a live call. Someone asking about our weeks. Was that actually? Yeah. We don't have permission to use their voice. We have permission. We don't.

Legally? No, because we actually are here at a radio station. Did you actually answer that call? Yeah, should we take it again? No, because we're not allowed to do that. Can you please just bleep it? People listening now will go, oh, I wonder what that person said. Just do it. Or do a voice.

I think that she just went, can't. I meant to bleep the swear word. Please do. Please do that. Anyway. Hey, so talk to me. You had a very eventful weekend, I've heard. Well, I know, and it's only Saturday.

I'm already exhausted. Well, the amount of times you've complained about a child this weekend. What do you mean? She's out of character for you. Well, you've seen Billy Elliot, right? Oh, don't say that. That makes me sound like an arsehole. You called me and the first thing you said was,

I never thought I'd slander a kid, but here I go. That never happened. Similar, similar. You and your embellishing. I just said that I went, okay, so for context, Billy Elliot the musical is in Sydney. Here in Sydney, yeah. My sister saw it on an excursion

what? like years ago when I was in town right not now you fuck seriously she's an adult with kids it's called A Backstory

right and she brought home the soundtrack and I played the soundtrack on CD and I like cherish it like I loved it so much I listened to it all the time

and then I watched Billy Elliot on YouTube at home because I never saw it she was on a Sydney excursion and now that it's 2019 it's come back to Sydney and then I'd watch Billy Elliot on YouTube at home because I never saw it. She was on a Sydney excursion. And now that it's 2019, it's come back to Sydney, I'm like, this is my time.

I'm going to love this. I'm going to be so emotional the whole time. I'm going to just adore every second of seeing this musical in the flesh after all these years of loving it from afar. Yeah. And I just think, obviously I put a lot of expectation on it, so they were under pressure from me. Right. But the particular Billy that I saw, like I said to you, was not great. Really?

They clearly cast him for his dancing, which he can do well, but his singing, no good. And how old is he? Some of my favourite numbers, I don't know. Butchered. How old do you think Billy Elliot is in the movie? Well, I saw the original Billy Elliot when your sister was on a school excursion with my step-grandma. No, but in the movie, how old do you think the character Billy Elliot is? Oh, like pre-teen, like 13, maybe 12.

Even then, I thought he was like 14. Really? Yeah, but in the musical, I swear this kid I saw had just come from crèche. Like he was like six. No, he did none. He was so young. Really? so young. Really? So young.

And I just wasn't, I just, he didn't nail the numbers I wanted him to nail and I was a little bit disappointed. And then I went back two nights later. This Billy was a little bit better, but still not there. Still not. I'm a tough marker, I'll tell you that. Was he still an infant? I don't know.

They seemed so much younger than I thought. Really? Because I always said that Billy Elliot was my gay awakening movie. Right. You know the scene in Billy Elliot where Michael and Billy Elliot was my gay awakening movie. Right. You know the scene in Billy Elliot where Michael and Billy kiss each other on the cheek? Yes. I remember as a youngster being like, oh, kissing other boys. I would never want to do that.

But then I couldn't stop thinking about it. So it was my gay awakening movie. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I feel you. And so then I saw them on stage and I'm like, they're eight. They're too young to be kissing. It's a phase. They wouldn't know.

Oh, no. Which is weird to watch. So you walk into the theatre. You have your Maltesers. God bless you. I do. Probably a pump of water because I know you love to hydrate. And you've probably been at the gym.

So you walk. Excuse me. Sorry. Excuse me. Got your nice jeans on. They're very tight. Excuse me. Sorry.

Squeeze past. Sorry. Excuse me. Is it 62B? Yeah. Sit down. Oh, it's starting. Oh, my God.

Ladies and gentlemen, Billy Elliot. Pretty much, yeah. He was so young. Really? I also have this thing where I buy the program to every musical I go to. That's nice. I've got this giant stack of programs in my house. I've seen them at your house, yeah.

And I was flicking through this program and I saw something that I thought was a little odd. Oh, God. So, it's got all the cast and characters, right? Yeah. I was like, oh, yes, that woman, yep, she plays the grandma. And headshots of them, the professional headshots, yeah. I was like, oh, yep, he plays Mrs. Wilkinson.

Oh, she plays Mrs. Wilkinson. Oh, she plays the grandma. Yep, he plays Tony. That guy plays Billy Elliot. Yeah. Dead mum is how they've credited it. I'm looking in the program and the role of dead mum, that's how they credited her.

Obviously, Billy Elliot's mum is passed in this storyline, but they just credit her not as Billy's mother or mum, just dead mum. I'm like, that's such a harsh way of crediting that character. It's almost like they gave the intern the job of writing the descriptions. And he's like, oh, we've got Billy, Elliot. All right, everyone, home time. Shit.

And the mum. What's the mum's name? Does she have a name? No. She's dead, isn't she? Yeah, yeah. Dead mum. That's awful.

But imagine if in every show or film or whatever that there was a dead character. That's how they credited it. Like in the last Harry Potter, right? Dumbledore is dead. So they just put him in the end credits as dead Dumbledore. I was just like, I can't believe they credited her as dead mum. That's a River of Harry Potter. Dead Potter parents.

What are they called? Jane and... Dead James and dead Lily. Is it Lily? No, not the girl of Modern Family. No, it's Lily and Potter. I said James and Lily and Potter. Yeah, you're right. It's Lily. It, not the girl of Modern Family. No, it's Lily and Potter. I said James and Lily and Potter. Yeah, you're right.

It's Lily. It's almost like... Dead Dobby. We're going down the Harry Potter tangent. Who else has died? Oh, from Grey's Anatomy. That dead doctor. Dead good-looking doctor.

Oh, I'm struggling to think of films where people have died. They're almost like... It's just more... And the role of... And in the film Titanic, Leonardo DiCaprio will be playing the role of dead Jack. Oh, it's almost a role that's quite sad or like there's some misery around it. Like for Finding Nemo, you could be like.

Lost fish. Missing Nemo. Missing clown fish. And then there is a scene in the opening of Finding Nemo where his dead mum makes an appearance. Mummy, I want to see Toy Story. Don't you mean alive

toys? Real cowboy? Yeah, like they clarify. Alive Billy Elliot. Alive Michael. Alive Tony. Dead mum! Barely alive uncle. That's atrocious. I've looked up the cast list online. Here, look.

It even says it on the website. Dead mum. It does not. Danielle Everett. She plays the role of dead mum. Dead mum forward slash ensemble. So I'm glad. So when mum's not dead, she's alive in the background.

That's absolutely awful. I did think that was odd. I actually should have done that as in, is it just me? Is it just me or is this a really weird thing to put in a program? No, that's no good. It belongs in ADD, bro. How do you talk about someone that's passed? You go, talk about them in past tense.

Because like if, you know, say for example, Jonathan's passed. You go, oh, Jonathan has some nice jackets. Do you say Jonathan had some nice jackets? Or you might say, oh, there's some leftover jackets from, there were Johns, you know. Oh, that's a bit. Leftover jackets of Johns, yes. That's a bit brutal. Dead John! Dead, oh, dear John. Who else has died? I want to think of some good ones.

Did John die in Dear John? Yeah, he stabbed him in the eyeball. Dead John! Dead Dear John! I loved, you know what I loved about that Bambi? That dead deer! It's just so aggressive. I can't read the word dead before someone's name, but without it being shouted at me. Dead man.

I've loved the latest season of Stranger Things. Spoiler alert. I've loved the latest season of Stranger Things where they had that dead police officer. Awful. Oh, God. What else is there? Dead man.

I don't know. Oh, shit. Someone's got us again. Awful. Oh, God. What else is there? Dead man. I don't know. Oh, shit. Someone's got us again. How exciting. Oh, my God. It's Michelle Everett, the dead mum. Danielle Everett. Shit, I tried.

I tried. Twitter audience is savage, especially towards me. Anytime I shade you, because you've got the podcast fan base and I've just got the real life fan base. Yes, a lot of Not My Cup of Tea listeners have come across and they still haven't quite warmed to you because you're insufferable. Yes, they have. They've warmed to me.

I'm just making that up. But they love to give me shit like you do because you enable them. You let them think they can berate me. People enable you too. They're sending dumb sound effects suggestions. Very true. Keep it coming, the Mitches. That's what I call my fans, the Mitches.

What? That's so obnoxious. Dirty Mitch. You know what? Son of a Mitches. That's what they're called. You know what some of my YouTube fans used to call themselves? Oh, no.

The Honeycombs. Like Honeycomb. That's very cute. I loved it. But you got it. You made that, I reckon. No, I didn't. I've never named a family.

Be real. Be real. You've never spoken about this on record because you're a public figure and it's hard to get comment from public figures. Hardly. No. When Bogangate happened, because if you don't know, Mitch was the famed Bogangate kid. Great video.

And I've told you this story. I think I even said it at one. It was a video of giving a tour of my hometown. But it was just named Bogan Gate. And I made it because we did a group assignment at TAFE for media. And we made, much like we have here, we just made a Facebook page. I think it was called Stevie, Tia and Mitch. It was like our fake radio show that we did in class.

And we had this Facebook page. It had like 20 followers, like our parents and stuff. And they didn't believe me when I said I lived in Bogan Gate. So when I went home for summer, like we'd finished the course, I made that video and put it on that page just so I could show Stephen and Tia like where I actually live and prove to them it's real. And then I went to bed and I woke up and it had like, oh, like 20,000 views.

Far out. And then it just kept growing by the day and it was the weirdest experience. You know what? There's a town with more than 5,000 people. Well, see, I didn't get it because that was my normal, but apparently there was a weird combination of things that made it funny, like the fact that the town is unbelievable that it's so small. I can't believe people actually live there.

The fact that I was super flamboyant and the only gay in the village. I didn't get it. I was like, what is everyone seeing this? Well, that's my question. I showed it to my mum before putting it up and she didn't laugh once. And then as soon as it went viral, she goes, ah, it's hysterical. Send this to me first husband. Hi.

That was my question. Are you actually the only gay person in Bogan Gate? Openly gay. Okay. Genuinely only openly gay? I don't know any. What is that? Siri, shut up, Siri.

So close to Halloween. How dare you? It's on theatre mode as well. I shouldn't do that. Have you enabled people that identify as queer in the Bougainvillea area to come out, do you think? Not that I know of, but when I was in school, my high school, there was no openly gay people. i was the only openly gay person there for like three months because i came out right

towards the end of year 12 right and now that i'm gone it's littered with poofs there's so many but that's what i mean and you might not want to i can't take credit for it but i do think that like just times change in general you're right you're right but seeing you having you come through would do a lot for those kids. All it takes is one. All it takes is one. So congratulations for that. And that's me being serious. Thanks.

I don't actually know. And now it's time to go back to the dogs and cats. I said steer away from animals. True. Don't do that. Sorry. Let's flip a coin. If it lands on heads, more dogs.

Tails, no dogs. No, don't. I know what you're going to say. Oh, again, I've heard this coin one a million times. Okay, now I'm in favour of the requests. I dropped my wallet. Because I need more. Mitch, delete them now.

Everything that you've already used, keep the tweet. That's fine. Everything you've already used, get rid of it because I'm bloody sick of it. Everyone's going to have to send in more suggestions because I can't be fucked. Send them to you direct so I don't know what they are. At Mitch Curie or just leave it in your review. What are you doing this Halloween? Nothing.

I carved a pumpkin. I got in the spirit. I'm good. You'll go home, your housemate's like, why are you covered in sticky? I'm not taking this home. You don't actually want me to put that in my house, do I? Yes, you're taking it home, and you're putting it at your doorstep, and you're putting a photo on the Instagram.

No. Yes. I'll just get a photo here in studio. Okay. I'll put it next to my head and compare it. Say, for example, you are at home, right, on, when is it? It's going to be Wednesday night. I think it's Thursday night, isn't it?

Is it? Really? I don't know. Well, maybe. I don't know. Well, say, for example, you're at home and then you're sitting on your bed, probably nude. I don't know.

I don't want to assume. But then all of a sudden, you go, shit, there's kids at the door. I've never been tricked or treated. Ever? No, no one's ever knocked on my door and asked for shit. No. What about in Bogan Gate? Surely.

Especially Bogan Gate. Why would there be people wandering the fucking outback? Are you serious? Like, especially not in Bogan Gate. This is... They'd have to drive kilometres to go from house to house. This is trick-or-treating in Bougainvillea. Do you have any water for the sheep?

That's dark. Sorry. Again, steer away from animals. Sorry, one more. The drought is taking its toll on our livestock. Okay, you try one. Ready, safe. Okay, I lived in a Sydney suburb quite well off,

so how would you imagine? How would you imagine? What do you mean quite well off. So how would you imagine? How would you imagine? What do you mean quite well off? I'm not Christ. I'm the soul of the earth. I got no money. But the suburb that I was surrounded by was rich. I didn't live in a rich suburb.

I should have clarified that. Sylvania. Google it. It's nothing. The Shire. Disgusting. The Shire, Sydney South. I lived in a real normal Aussie home.

But we lived around the corner from Sylvania Waters and that was like there was a TV series a reality series called Sylvania Waters back when I was in growing up the first ever reality series

boring anyway so we used to walk around to Sylvania Waters to get the good candy because we lived in the shit area so okay I'm giving you a shot

this is me coming to the door in the Sutherland Shire on Halloween Hi Trick or Treat it's me Mitch Cherry is me coming to the door in the Sutherland Shire on Halloween. Hi, Trick or Treat, it's me, Mitch Cherry. Haven't got any candy, but I've got some eckies, cunt! What?

Absolute filth, live in your area. Why do I forward announce myself with my first and last name? Because I wanted to be clear to the listeners that I was being you at the start and not the person answering. All right. It's a call to set up. What can I do for you? Hi, it's me, Mitchell Coombs. If you don't follow me, do it please. I just want you to tell me how much you love me. I live off gratification. That's my candy.

Coming from you, it's funny because I hate self-promo but when it comes to my podcast and stuff like that, I self-promo the fuck out of it. We do self-promo a lot. All shame goes out the window when it comes to that, but I would never plug my own Instagram. If you've gotten to the end of this episode,

please, for the love of Christ, tell a friend. Sure. That's all I want to say. Yeah. Well, I think that's good. I think it's a good place to end it. Tell a friend. Tell a friend about this poem.

This Halloween. Turn to your friends that you're trick-or-treating with or whatever you do and say, Bruh, got a sick podcast for you to listen to. And you've got live tweets and everything. It's killer. You know what you need to do this Halloween? Walk up to a front door. Why is it the My Kitchen Rules doorbell?

I don't know. It is, isn't it? I forgot about that. Oh, well. Guess I can't use that sound effect anymore. No, I'll leave it in there. I'll see you in court menu. I've got backups. There you go.

That sounds like mine. I pictured it. Really? I expect to hear my dog barking after that. Oh, don't worry. Because he always used to bark. We can make that happen. No, have you got a mini fox carrier bark in that library?

Cross Jack Russell if possible. Let me have a look. Okay, let's try this. Ready? Oh, my God. Shut up, bandit. Sit down. I feel like someone kicked that dog towards the end.

Ready? Would have been you. Oh, that's horrendous. Okay, again, steer away from animals. No, I did not. Let's not do been you. Oh, that's horrendous. Okay, again, steer away from animals. No, I did not. Let's not do that again. I didn't do that.

That's just what the sound effect is. No, but the sound effect did not sound like that, but because you said it sounds like a dog being kicked or everyone's head went to imagining that. Okay, well, let's try this.

It sounds like a dog that sounds overjoyed to see someone they love. How much more pleasant is that? There's still a bit of whimpering in it. I was about to. You're not doing yourself any favours. No, you're not wrong.

Sorry, I've already done it. I told you to delete that. You liar. I kept it. Get rid of it. Let's get out of here. It's been a great show. Very DIY-y.

Look at the pumpkin pics on... Hey, I'm going to send you pumpkin pics. Hey, send me those pumpkin picks uh it's disgusting it'll all be up on the at a couple of at a couple of inches on instagram you're still struggling with that we're also an i heart radio podcast just so you know just gives a street cred i mean okay all right you need to stop because i don't know when to end alright we better go hold on I actually wonder if you are capable of wrapping this show up

yourself I can do it because it always seems to be me that goes alright guys that's it alright bye bye and then you talk a bit more and then I go

alright see ya I'm going to see if you are actually capable of wrapping it up ready alright okay okay I'm going to unplug my mic okay oh

oh shit okay alright guys that's enough for this week we are heading out so I'm going to unplug my mic. Okay. Oh. Oh, shit. Okay. All right, guys. That's enough for this week. We are heading out. So this has been a couple of Mitches. Follow us on socials and we will chat with you next week. We'll talk then.

See you guys. Oh, one more to go. Who is it? That's my auntie Julie. She just joined Twitter. Hi, Jules. If you put a dot before you tweet, then it won't be a subtweet. Nice.

Thank you. You taught me that. Anyway, that's enough for the week. I'm joking. All right. We'll see you next week. Bye, guys. See you.

Is it just me? Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review on your podcast app. I did it!