Is It Just Me? - #86: Tai Verdes HATES Coombs

Episode Date: October 3, 2021

It’s Churi’s birthday AND we’re all reunited in studio!In this episode:Mercury in retrograde is fucking with us again (8:18)Churi’s ‘MINDBLOWING’ TikTok misconception (13:44)This week’s reviews (17:27)Does Tai Verdes HATE Coombs? (19:24)Talkback Tingz - Radio Quiz Fails (33:09)Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (48:24)Our parody of A-O-K by Tai Verdes (53:01)Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. Television legend Kerri-Ann Kennelly fell several meters from a trapeze while performing in the musical Pippet. Oh, Pippet! Some things make more sense than others. Ring Pike's Nurseries. What nursery? Pike's P-Y-K-E-S. P-Y-A...

K as in kill! P-Y-A. K as in kill. P-Y-E. K! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Why is being alive so expensive? I'm not even having a good time. This is Is It Just Me?

Hosted by a couple of Mitches. What about me? Don't forget Chin-O. Who? Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coombs. Oh, my God, 86 with a couple of dicks. Welcome, Mitchell Coombs, back to the studio. Oh, thank you.

Back in the same room. I literally felt like I was packing my bag for my first day of school today. I can imagine. Do you have a packed lunch? Show me. I don't even know where my backpack was. I was like, I've got to pack this to go to the studio. It's very weird, but here I am. Anyway, not about me.

It's your birthday. Oh, it is my birthday. Happy birthday. Thanks, I brought my own birthday music. No, you've got to play that. What was it, Jenna? Prizekeeper Jenna's here, obviously. Hi, Jenna.

Hello. What was that? Last week, we realised there was some song released on the same day as Mitch's birthday. Yes, yes. Oh, I saved it. The Mozart one. The magic flute. That's it. That's it. Hold on. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you've got to day as Mitch's birthday. Yes, yes. Oh, I saved it, the Mozart one. The magic flute. That's it.

That's it. Hold on. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you've got to blast that for your birthday. It's your official birthday song. That's the song. Happy birthday, Mitchell. Thank you.

How old do you think I am, guess? 43. No. Now, Jenna, today of all days, you can't be a cow. We're not allowed to. 23. I am in charge. Actually, on my birthday, the one thing that I'd want more than anything is to not be in charge.

Yeah, well, I mean, we've got a full show planned coming up. It's not going to be one of those big bloody birthday hoo-hahs, though. Like, I can't be bothered. No. We've still got your present, though. Yes. Jenna, you go first. Oh, okay.

Mine's so much better than hers. You know what? Can I just say, these are the only presents I'm going to get in person this year, other than Hayden, because I can't see my family. Oh, well, the first one's always the best. Yes. So let's go. And it sets the standard high.

Are you going to come over, or do I come to you? I'll come over. Okay, I'll sit here. I was in the same boat with not being able to see anyone on my birthday. It was on a weekend, too. Oh. At least you'll be able to come to work for yours. And you couldn't picnic, either.

No. Oh, that's a big box. Yeah. So is the gift. Oh my god! So this is Janet's present. It's quite big. Oh, it's an obscure shape. It is. It's like a rhombus.

Do you want to put it up here? What is this? Janet, why don't you announce? Do you want to preface it no i just opened the thing have you not done this before just open the fucking present it's right in front of you opening jenna's first present it's good oh it's your very own is it just me random trolley. It's got branding on it. Because you love trolley. It's a mini trolley. Isn't it beautiful? It is mini, isn't it?

It's actually a really weird size. It's like, it's useless either way. As an actual trolley, it's too small. But as an ornament, far too big. It's a very odd size, isn't it? It's a very odd size. Hold on, hold on. I love it.

Isn't it lovely? And you've got the logo on it and everything. Yes. You know what? I could use this as a bar cart. Oh, that's a great idea. Yeah, I could put it in the corner of my living room and I could put vodkas and liquors in there. Yes.

How do I look with it? Oh, so cute. Fabulous. I'll get a photo for our Instagram later. Yeah, we'll put it on the socials. That is glorious. But now this is the big one. Yeah.

Oh, that was big. Thank you, Jenna. I love it. big one. Yeah. Oh, that was big. Thank you, Jenna. I love it. Mwah. Wow. Oh, no need to kill the silence, guys. It's fine. Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.

I was just admiring the gift. Same. I was admiring the trolley. It's a very good gift. Oh. For you. Thank you. It's not as big, but.

Square. Hefty. Is it a frame of sorts? Well, yeah, it is Okay, alright, I'll get to know Oh, is it our first million dollar check? No, no, no I don't even remember where I put that

No, no, it's mine Oh, wow, I love the wrapping paper too Oh yeah, sorry, that was the leftover wrapping paper From my nephew's present It's got like tractors and stuff Very childish, but can you just open it for God's sake? You love a dwelling, don't you? I'm one of those people that get really anxious before opening gifts, so I love to stall. Why do you get anxious?

I don't know, because I want my reaction to be perfect. No, don't overthink your reaction. Just react genuinely. Oh, I've opened the back of it, which is always a good up when you open it. Well done. Well done. Okay. All right, I can see the back.

Oh, this is exciting. And I'm slowly turning for the first time. Oh, contraceptive diaphragm. Sam's just thrown it out the window. So it's facing Sam. I haven't seen it yet. What's your first reaction without ruining it? It's very special.

It's fabulous, isn't it? Beautiful. All right, I'm turning it down. The big reveal. What is in the frame? Oh, this is exciting. He's speechless for once. Who?

I got a sketch artist to do a caricature of Mitch as Dot Wiggins. Oh, my God. So it's like his old lady alter ego, but it looks like him. It literally looks like Mrs. Doubtfire. Oh, my God, it does. I love her. But then it looks like you. It's looks like Mrs Doubtfire. Oh, my God, it does. I love her. But then it looks like you. It's kind of creepy, the hybrid.

Wait, wait, wait. This is amazing. Isn't it? Did you send them a photo of me? Yeah. What was the source material? I think it was the photo of us reacting to the Mimms magic. Yes.

We were horrified because it looked like a bag of jizz. Yeah, it did. But it was moisturiser. Oh, my God. This is one of the best gifts I've ever received in my life. I know, right? Look at that. Told you, Jenna.

No, I have to admit. That's a good gift. And I went to the guy that was making the custom frame and he told me what he was going to do and I said, no, no, that doesn't look nannerish enough. Yeah. I need something more nannerish. But Hayden told me it had to be a white frame to go with the house. Oh, did he?

Yeah. I'm a pain in the ass. Oh, I love it. I'll put a photo of that on the Instagram too. It's actually quite freaky. Mitch as an old woman. That is sensational. Now we have a visual of what Dot looks like every time she arrives.

To be fair, that's exactly what I pictured in my mind. Yeah. Very similar. She was a bit older, but she actually looks quite good in that. I think she looks great. She's even got your quiff. It's just great. Anyway, happy birthday.

I'm ready for the next ones. Well, I mean, you know what we're like. If there's any sort of special occasion. Mitch has dug down. Ta-da. You know what happens if it's a special occasion. We've got a bit of wine, obviously. Alcohol.

Yeah. Pop it. Oh, is it corked? You should pop it. I'll pop it. It's my birthday. Thank you. I've got two.

One of them sits for me later. Unless we open the second. I don't mind. I don't think we'll get there. Well, oh, what got two. One of them sits for me later. And let's re-open the second. I don't mind. I don't think we'll get there. Well, oh, what beautiful gifts. Come grab a glass, Sam. Okay. All right, everyone.

Three, two, one. Cheers. Oh, happy birthday. Were they what you were expecting, these gifts? Not at all. Not in the slightest. 26, huh? I know.

Look at you guys. So today on the show, we're going to be doing Talk Back Tings. You know how we love that. And also the guy behind A-OK, you know that song that we've played many times on this podcast, Ty Verdes. You'll hear the interview we did with him and put it this way, I've never walked away from an interview and thought, they hate me. Oh my God. Neither have I and I didn't this interview because he loved me,

but he hated you. It was purely channeled in my direction. You'll hear what happened later. It's just shocking. Thank you, Jenna. Pass me a glass. Yeah, so Ty's on later. Yeah, and talk back, Tings.

I'm killing time while you pour wine, but you're taking your fucking time. Sam, do you want one? Yeah, that'd be great. He's not here to fuck spiders. He's just in the queue. Almost gone for a bottle, guys. Well, I've got another bottle, don't you worry. All right, everyone, cheers.

Cheers. Happy birthday, Cheery. Thank you. Happy birthday. Brilliant gifts. All right, who wants to go first, but there is a chance. I don't need to say, if it's your first time listening, like we always say at a chaotic episode, go back.

Stop listening and listen to something else. Yeah, this will make no sense. But every week we start the same way with two Is It Just Me? First time listening, like we always say at a chaotic episode, go back. Stop listening and listen to something else. Yeah, this will make no sense. But every week we start the same way with two Is It Just Me? Something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Both idjams. Mitch doesn't know mine. I don't know his.

You begin. I want to drink some wine and admire my gifts. Sure. All right. I can kick things off. Hit it, Bradley. Is it just me or? Does moving house make you feel a bit emosh?

Yes. Family homes, yes. But I've never had to move out of an apartment yet. Oh, that's true. Oh, yeah. I mean, didn't you move to New York? Like, was that sad leaving there? No, I was excited.

I was 19. I thought I was straight. I was very confused mentally. I meant coming back. Oh. Yes, I was very upset. Yes, that's a good point. I do remember crying when I moved out of my family home, which I wasn't

expecting because I was so rearing and ready to get to Sydney. But on the driving down the lane, I was like, oh, I was going to miss it. Past the one traffic light. Ready to see heaps of you. But actually, by the time this episode's out, I will have already moved apartments.

And you know that process you go through when you're looking for one where you're like so eager, yeah, let's get it, you're fighting for it. After that settles and it's locked in, it's only been now that I'm about to move out that I'm like, oh, I'm actually going to miss this place. There's a few things about it that I love that the new place does not have. Yeah, there's a charm that you learn to love about your place. And you learn things about homes that are so so minute and so detailed like

little ins and outs like i know the fact that our doors don't open fully because the design was clearly done wrong and they didn't measure in this place or your old place my current place that i'm in but i kind of like that the doors are funky like that aren't you guys looking to move too oh yeah we'll be out of there in a heartbeat yeah right okay i'll hire a move list and we'll be out like that but it's all the memories as well. My current place, I get a bit of afternoon sun. Yeah. And I love just having a little afternoon nap with the cat on the end of the bed.

Sun beaming on me. Nah, my new bedroom is like north-facing or something, so I'll just get the blaring midday sun. No, you like north. It's good, isn't it? Is it? North is great because then you get morning and afternoon sun because it sits like this.

It's a lot of sun. A lot of sun. Too much sun regardless. But also I feel bad for the cat. Poor Isabella. She loves getting up on our balcony at the moment, you know, the brick edge. Yeah. The new balcony, the railing around the side is like a metal bar.

So if she gets up on that, she'll fall to her death. And she's hefty. Yes, she loves sitting up on the balcony just looking at the birds in the trees next door. And I'm like, oh, I'm going to miss that. But she'll still be able to sit on the balcony, right? Not up on the ledge. She'll just learn to love jet planes and smoke.

And the beautiful view of Sydney. Yeah, you have a beautiful view. I've seen the photos. And aircon, so it's like I'm not going to be too upset. I know. I was about to say, think of the pros, baby. Think of the pros. I know.

I just feel like I get a bit hyper-emotional because Mercury is officially in retrograde, as you know, when I get a bit whack during this period. For someone so sound and sensible, beautiful even that horse shit shocks me. I know. That actually is just my undoing. Like, I try and be rational at all times, but I don't even know what it means. What does Mercury in retrograde mean? I don't know what that means in terms of planets. But all I know is that in layman's terms, shit gets a bit fucked when Mercury's in retrograde.

Doesn't retrograde mean back? Like it's retro, it's going backwards, retrograding? Yeah. Come on about gold star Googlers. Google what that means. Yeah, I think so. I'll do it. No, I'll do it.

No one's fighting you, Jenna. No, I'm doing it. Go on. But you're not a sentimental person. Actually, no, you know what? I was going to actually take that right back. You give off the impression that you're not sentimental, but you are very mushy. Oh, yeah.

Very mushy. I mean, I don't get all sappy in person and stuff, but, you know. If I need to, I can, you know. I'm good at writing things because it's hard to articulate when you're feeling sentimental, you know. Yes, I agree with you. Jenna's got the Google. Yep.

So Mercury retrograde is an optical illusion, which means it looks as if the planet is moving backwards from our view here on Earth. So it's ultimately an optical illusion. So it's not real. Can you, no, Google, why does shit get fucked? Hey, Siri, why does shit get fucked when Mercury's in retrograde? Because it happens every time.

And the bloody Mercury retrograde shadow period right before, just in the last couple of weeks, all of my technology failed. It always happens. I'm waiting for car trouble. That's what it's going to be. Astrologers believe that during this perceived backwards motion, technology and communication could get disrupted. Really?

Putting a damper on anyone's news. Well, that checks out because your MacBook was smashed. Your webcam was shocking. Yep. Your microphone just had an attack. Oh, my God. I brought my mic that I use when I'm broadcasting from home into the studio today. And as I plugged in, it blew up.

Fuck, I told you it's real. And my internet wasn't working. Were we recording that? Because we could play that. I think we were. Oh, my God. Let's leave space for this audio now of Mitch's mic having an heart attack. This is the planets fucking me over again.

Oh, wait. Do you want to do... Oh, what was that? That's not ideal. Did you hear that, Sam? Yeah. It went out of the mic. It was like the mic became a speaker.

Talk into it now. I've not plugged it in. Oh, plug it in again. It went out of the mic. It was like the mic became a speaker. Talk into it now. I've not plugged it in. Oh, plug it in again. I'll pull it down low. No, we need to see. It blows up. It won't blow up. I don't want to ruin me mic.

This might be a later issue, so I'll bring that up with the text later. Let's, for today, just use the normal one, and we'll figure that out later, because that was fucking no good. Doesn't sound healthy, does it? Anyway, let's move on. Yeah, you know what, Mitch? I think regardless, like you said, you've got air con, you've got beautiful city views.

It's a nicer apartment. Like, it's not as dinky and it's new. Yeah, I mean, I've coped with change before, so I'll be fine. But, you know. All right, well, here's to the new house, darling. All right. What have you got? What's your interest to me?

Let's do my birthday jam! Is it just me? Or... Did you also think that hibernation meant that bears would just sleep for three months straight? Do they not? No! What?

Where do they go? What do they do? Oh, no! No, they go into a tree and sleep. No! Nope! Wrong! Where are you getting this information? Incorrect! Okay. What do they do? Oh, no. No, they go into a tree and sleep. No. Nope. Wrong. Where are you getting this information?

Incorrect. Okay. Well, what does it actually mean? I'm getting it from the Encyclopedia of the World in 2021. TikTok. Oh. Bears do not hibernate. And I think Sam is furiously Googling.

I can see his hair flailing. Yeah, I don't trust you at all. Well, you can corroborate. Oh, I don't think that's the right use of that word. You can find out they do not hibernate. They don't sleep. Yes, in the cold months, they need to reserve their body warmth. So they will gather food, and they'll gather salmon and nuts and little treats and lint

balls that they find in the log cabins. And honey. And honey. During hibernation. Before hibernation to get ready for the cold months. And then when the cold months hit, they've just got a stockpile so they don't have to hunt or they don't have to go searching because they can go, geez, I need to save this energy.

Yeah, let's go to the pantry and see what I've got stocked up. They're not actually sleeping the whole time. So when you go to Costco and do a big shop, you're basically hibernating because you don't have to go to the grocery shop for like a week or two. Yes, but we were all lied to as children because I had the same thought. So did you.

So did you. So did Sam. Yeah, I pictured them just having a really long snooze in a cave somewhere, loving life and then being like, oh, that was a great three months. I'm going to go about my business now. But I also feel like in movies like Over the Hedge, remember? Over the Hedge, that bear. I think in the start of that movie, he does a big comical yawn

and wakes up after hibernation. We were tricked as kids. Sam, any info? Yeah, it's pretty much everything you're saying, which is this is a rarity. Oh, my God. You're joking. I know.

Doesn't that just blow your mind? But then I guess when you think about it, sleeping for three months sounds ridiculous. Yeah, you'd get over it real quick, wouldn't you? Yeah. Has anything significant happened in the last three months that I would get a shock if I woke up now? Like, imagine I've just been asleep,

hibernating for three months, and then I woke up today, and I was like, oh, fuck, we're in lockdown again. Oh, yeah, true. I've lost all this weight, so you'd be shocked looking at me for the first time. Not true. Nothing else, is there? No, nothing else, really.

Maybe I will sleep for three months. Screw this, there's nothing happening. I will too. Do you know what I posted recently that people were shocked to find out yeah i posted a video on tiktok saying that um it's actually not illegal to have your interior lights on in the car when you're driving at night and all these comments were like what yeah i'm a fully grown adult i thought that you can't drive at night with your lights on in the car or you'll get a fine and I got so many comments that I had to second guess myself I was like shit maybe it is illegal

am I spreading misinformation no no fact check it is not illegal oh and our mothers made it out like it was a cardinal sin to turn those lights on in the car have you ever seen a car with its lights on just driving no I mean mum had a point

it's very inconvenient to have it on, but there's no law against it. You're not going to go to prison for having your interior lights on. Man, pull over. Your LED's on. You know what else? The same thing can be said about not eating before you swim. Remember growing up when your parents would be like, ah, ah, ah, 30 minutes. Wait 30 minutes. You'll get a stitch. You'll get a stitch. Stitches were, ah, ah, 30 minutes. Wait 30 minutes.

You'll get a stitch. Stitches were real. But that wasn't real. That was nothing. That was just because parents don't want to fucking watch you while they eat their food. Exactly. You know, another thing that I posted in that video, a lie we were all told as kids, is that you don't lick other people.

I think you'll find we do. Some people pay for that. Is it just me? Who doesn't love some free shit? All you have to do is leave a review. Okay, review time. If your review gets read out on the podcast, you've got a week to get in touch with Pricekeeper Jenna

and you get a season three commemorative mug. Now, today, reviews aren't for the podcast. They're just for me because it's my birthday. Becky messaged me and said, I love you. Congratulations. You get the mug. Our Instagram, at Couple of Mitches, is where you can claim your prize. And you can also buy a mug if you did not win one.

They're for sale, guys. So you don't want to go without. They're bloody beautiful. They are very nice, our little mugs. You can get pink as well. They're bloody beautiful. They are very nice, our little mugs. You can get pink as well. They're very cute. The Hungry Vegan, well, eat a fucking steak, says the perfect driving companion.

Best podcast ever, Mitch, Mitch and Jenna. You've kept me driving during pre-COVID life. Lockdowns and a move to a new city. Speaking of moves, I'm a full-time student delivering Uber Eats at night. And this podcast is on permanent rotation. While I work, nothing else makes me laugh quite so loudly. Love your work. Did she say Uber Eats?

Yeah. Oh, okay. That's fine because no one's in the car. I was going to say Uber drivers. Imagine having us on in an Uber. Uber Eats. Four stars. Oh, come in.

Just wait there. Hi, thanks for the food. No worries. They run off to their car. Did you eat my schnitzel burger? Giggling away. We must pain the hungry vegan to deliver meat to people. Oh, wouldn't it ever.

That's why they listen to our podcast to drown out the sorrow of eating a pig. Alright, speaking of pig, this review comes in from Mohan Jed. Mohan, short and sweet, love the comes in. That's savage. From Mohan Jed. Mohan, short and sweet, love the show. You're all amazing and love the extra little bits in the intro. Five stars.

Don't know what you're talking about, Mohan, but thanks for the kind words. Fib Mohan. There's nothing there. I didn't hear anything. Nothing, see. If you leave us a review, you've got a week to get in touch with Jenna. Like I said, just reiterating the point. All right, shall we roll what I would like to call the car crash of an interview that you you got a week to get in touch with jenna like i said just reiterating the point um uh all right

shall we shall we roll what i'd like to call the car crash of an interview that we did with ty verdes okay so look i listened back and it's actually not as bad as i felt that it was in the moment but listen right now and you will notice that every single question i asked he just disagreed with he'd just be like no that's not right no like I asked, he just disagreed with. He'd just be like, no, that's not right. Nah. Like everything I said, he'd just disagree with. And it was so off-putting because he loved you. But I just felt like, oh my God, this guy who wrote A-OK,

he's like this kindness ambassador. Yeah. Beaming positivity. He fucking can't stand me. Yeah, he didn't like you at all. Don't egg it on. I was overthinking it, but now you're just confirming he didn't like me. Yeah, he didn't like you at all. Don't egg it on. I was overthinking it, but now you're just confirming he didn't like me.

No, he hated you. Anytime Mitch uttered a word, he would, no, you know, you'll hear it in the interview. So Mitch and I did this the other afternoon from home, and this is hit superstar from AOK, Ty Verdes. Let's roll our chat. Ty Verdes. Let's roll our chat.

Ty Verdes is here. Hello, buddy. Welcome. Hi. What's good? How are you doing? We're good. So good to see you again, man. I remember when we were set up to do a radio chat for my show way back when, like in the early days.

And we were like, oh, still talking about TikTok, still talking about the job you had at Verizon. And now look at your big league star. Thank you for making the time to talk to us and come back. Listen, it was great because you guys were one of the first people to hit me up and now we're back, so we have to come back. Mitch, I don't know if you know this about Ty, and I don't know if you like talking about it, Ty,

but he was like a nine to five worker. Like, were you depressed? did you hate your job like you had a standard job at a phone store pre pandemic and now you're here yeah that's right i mean i don't think anyone especially if you don't like the long-term goal of your job like if your goal is to be in phones forever then you're gonna like your job but i didn't want to be in phones forever so i don't think that i would like that end result so obviously i didn't like the place I was at, but I still had this like positive outlook of like spending my free time that I did have working on music and that was like my release.

It is pretty cool when you're able to turn the side hustle into the main hustle though, right? Like you were doing music on the side, but now it's your main gig. It's quite tiring when you're doing a nine to five, coming home and then doing what you actually want to do. It's like, oh, I've just been doing things all day. Yeah, you know what? It's not when you actually like the thing that you're doing.

Like that's kind of a really good indicator when you really like something is that you'll do it no matter how tired you are or you'll schedule it in or you'll get yourself to the places that you'll need to be in order to keep doing that thing. Like for me, I didn't want to do anything that was requiring me like acting or like i didn't want to do a podcast after work i didn't want to do like stand-up comedy routines after work which is all stuff that i had tried to do before um but music the process of making music for me was like awesome it was like cool to try and sound good that was my entire time was like just

trying to sound good yeah I feel you do you um do you look back um on old music and think oh my god I can't believe like that stuff that I was writing and putting out into the world compared to where you're at now like is your music different now that you've had some hits I think my music is the same I really think that a lot of people try to overthink their songs a lot of the time and they're like oh it needs to be mixed perfectly mastered perfectly whatever i think like if you're very genuine with the songwriting process that you know your songs don't lose that they're they're evergreen you know that they stay the same i think they're my first song like maybe my first five songs that i made those were obviously me working on some stuff but after that like after

you find your voice and you start saying things that are actually a little bit vulnerable and have a story to them they last for a pretty long time well aok is the big one obviously that's blowing up recently and did you find that people then discovered your old music because remember lizzo did that song Good As Hell in 2016, but it didn't blow up until 2019. So I feel like a lot of your old hits would be getting a bit of traction now, right? People are just finding out about you.

No, I don't really care what people dig into. I care about me creating. You know, because I make the music for myself. I don't really make it for the fans or anything at all. That's why it sounds like me. That's why it doesn't sound like anyone else that's out right now is because I'm just writing it from my perspective. Yes, they might be finding some old stuff,

but no matter what they, whatever the entry point is, it's still me. Yeah, right. You're like, they can catch up. Like, I'm in the future. I'm working in the future. They can catch up to me. A-OK, right, is getting 1 million new streams every day. Like, that's nuts to think about. You go to bed, and when you wake up, you go, like, is getting 1 million new streams every day. That's nuts to think about.

You go to bed and when you wake up, you got like close to a million, maybe 800K in that 12-hour window, 500K, right? That is ridiculous. You probably have people that you pass in the street that would be listening to your music. That is crazy. I was in LA and I was driving and someone had the windows down blasting my song.

I look over to the right and I was like and someone had the windows down blasting my no I look over the right and I was like yo this is me and they were like and they rolled the window I go I was like okay uh you know I gotta hit and make a few more hits before people recognize my face but it's okay yeah true you gotta get the face out there you gotta get our only fans maybe are you doing tiktoks you still doing tiktoks of course it's doing tiktok yeah man I do tiktoks all the time I think it's because I'm on tour where it's harder to do TikToks as consistently, but it shouldn't be. I think I'm just going to be showing more of the tour life in this upcoming, you know, weeks. Well, I mean, you nearly got 2 million followers. So, you know, your TikTok's chugging along just fine, I feel.

And I actually saw, I actually saw the TikTok you did before AOK officially came out. You were just in your car jamming to the song. And I came into the podcast the next day and I was like, oh, my God, this song's amazing. We've got to play it on the show. And then we got a bunch of messages saying, that song you played, it cheered me up. It made my day so much better.

You must get a real kick out of knowing you cheer a lot of bitches up every day. I'm not. I'm really not. I'm not trying to make anyone feel that great, but I'm glad that it's happening. It was like a nice little, like, it's really cool that people message me nowadays and like, wow, this song makes me feel better when I'm down or depressed and stuff like that. I did not make the song thinking that I was going to do that, but it did.

I made the song to make myself feel better and it's making everyone else feel better. That's good too. So I'm just happy. If I remember correctly, the goal was just to make people feel 2% better. When you first put the little preview on TikTok, this is what you said. I just want to make you feel 2% better when you listen to this song. That's it. Just two.

Ready? Ready? Living in this big new world with my head up in outer space. I know I'll be A-O-A-O-K. I know I'll be A-O-A-O-K. When I see trouble come my way, I'll be making lemonade. I know I'll be A-O-A-O-K. I know I'll be A-O-A-O-K. And so we've actually stolen that line tie for our podcast.

At the end of every episode, I now say, we hope this podcast made you feel 2% better today. That's all. So I just feel like while we've got you, I need to get your blessing. Is that okay that we've just totally plagiarized you there? Take it. Take it. Thank God. I was losing sleep.

Okay, great. It's safe. I was losing sleep. Hey, congrats on all the success. It's very exciting. Are you still getting old school friends and Verizon phone store friends being like, hey, remember me? Are they hitting you up? You know what?

I don't think that ever will stop, you know? Yeah. The coolest part about it is like the people that kind of just taper, out of my life that there was no bad blood. And I had like a connection with them. They are coming back in and I'm just like, yo, what's up? What you doing?

Like, that's the coolest part is like remembering things. Cause I don't have the best memory in the world, but when people that I've known come back to my life that have these memories of me and they hold them like really close and they tell me about them, I have like a bigger memory now, which is awesome.

Bloody hell. All right, man. We love you. We think you're great. And AOK is brilliant. It's unofficially the anthem of our podcast. Like we said, we steal the tagline. Why don't, can you tell the listeners, because they're listening now,

like can you give them a mantra? Like maybe you can do the sign off on today's show and go, hey, like is it just me listeners? That's the name of the show. Is it just me listeners? Hope you're feeling 2% better. Like in your own way, you can give the sign-off on today's show and go, hey, like is it just me, listeners? That's the name of the show. Is it just me, listeners? Hope you're feeling 2% better. Like in your own way, you can give the blessing to the listeners today. Is it just me, listeners?

I hope you feel 2% better right after you listen to this song. I want those notes blessing your little eardrums. Love it. Doesn't get much better than that. No, it doesn't. Now, one last thing, very important before we let you go. There's a question I ask every single guest that we have. It's we get them to contribute to our list of things better than drugs

and dick, which is basically a PSA to younger listeners that, hey, boys and partying are not the be all and end all of life, okay? So little things in life you appreciate. all and end all of life. Okay. So little things in life you appreciate. A good crunch of an apple, a nice stroll in the breeze. What are you thinking? What's better than drugs and dick to you? What is better than drugs and dick? I think that the biggest thing, and this is going to get a little existential, but the biggest thing is doing something that you like the process of. Oh, I like that. If you really love the process of anything, I think you should use that,

take it and try to make money doing it. Like if you really like honey, then go figure out how to make a honey brand with a honey podcast and a honey YouTube channel and be the honey guy. Go get some bloody bees. Yeah. Buy some bees. Yeah, buy some bees. Like do whatever you love and try to make money off that because life is way too long to be doing shit

that you don't like. People try to convince you that it's short. It's not. It's super long. All these decisions are long-term, but you got to be sure that you're doing stuff that you like every single second of this bitch. Genius.

I love it. You've sold me. I love toast. I'm going to bring my own second of this bitch. Genius. I'm so tired. You've sold me. I love toast. I'm going to bring my own toaster line into the world. You've inspired me. I'm doing it. You should listen. This is what you're doing.

I'm telling you right now, you do different grades of how toasted the bread is and rate every single one of them. You know, I'm just marketing right now. That's all I'm doing. Brilliant. Mitch,

he said you have to enjoy the process. You would not enjoy the process of putting a toaster out. You'd just be like, someone else do the work, I'll put my name on it. Yeah, I enjoy the process of eating it. So we need to fine-tune the process there. Maybe I've got it wrong. But we love the mantra nonetheless. 3% better, 2% better, no matter how much it is, we love you.

It's so good to have you on the show. And we'll talk to you soon, I guess, when the next hit song comes out. All right. I got some stuff in the kitchen for you. Is he in the kitchen? He. See, the kitchen is good. Ty, get back to toast. He's a genius. All right, man.

We'll talk in a bit, okay? Okay. I'll see you again. All right. See you, mate. Gee, the banter between Ty and myself, electric. Sounds like you go way back. Well, we do, quite clearly.

But you and Ty? Oh, my God. Oh, what is happening? I felt like a bit of a nuisance. Again, maybe I'm overthinking it because he seems like quite a nice guy that actually isn't capable of hate, but I was like, oh, he can't stand me. He hates you. That first question you asked, I've got to hear the first question, Jenna.

You must get a real kick out of knowing you cheer a lot of bitches up every day. I'm not. I'm really not. My mistake. All right. I'm i'm not i'm really not my mistake all right i'm really not i'm really not anything maybe it's just that one question no it's quite tiring when you're doing a nine to five coming home and then doing what you actually want to do it's like i've just been doing things all day yeah you know what it's not oh that's all right then never mind also on, it is so. Yeah.

I don't like that message that he's putting out there because, like, when you're doing a nine to five, it doesn't matter how much you love the thing you're doing out of work. Sometimes you are just spent. You've got nothing less to give. So screw that answer, Tyne. I should ask at next interview all the same questions you ask this interview and he'll agree with me.

He's like, yeah, man, I'm so exhausted. This was my favourite though, ready? So I feel like a lot of your old hits would be getting a bit of traction now, right, people are just finding out about you. No. Oh. Oh, never mind then. No.

No. Hey, your name's Ty, right? No. The song's A-OK? No. Nope. No, if you asked it, it'd be Ty, right? No. The song's A-OK? No. Nope. No, if you asked it, it'd be fine. But if I asked it...

Your name Ty? Yeah, man, yeah. Oh, yeah, Ty Burdett. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No. It's just so... It's gaming. I was just like, oh.

No. I'll just shut my mouth. No. He even agreed with you when it was completely false. He goes, yeah, I remember you guys. You were one of the first people to reach out to me. I've never spoken to him in my life. Yeah, he did say guys.

He agreed with your incorrect statements, but everything, I thought I made valid points. And he's just like, no. Imagine if you said, do you remember us? No. Ty, what did you vote in the same-sex marriage plebiscite? No. Oh, no. Imagine if you said, do you remember us? No. Ty, what did you vote in the same-sex marriage plebiscite? No. Oh, interesting. Very good to... No.

No, he's nice. He was clearly tired. I don't want to make excuses. Actually, no, he wasn't fucking tired. No, he's not. Because even though he works a full day and does his beautiful side hustle on the side, it doesn't tire him no no no it just goes to show no it's a real test of whether you love it or not hey mate i love editing

this podcast but when i've been up since 4 a.m this is when i had the old job it's still exhausting no matter how much you love it screw that love him though listen to the song it's good a-okay you can stream it now wherever you get your a-okays no all right let's move on i believe mitchell mitchell i believe uh we have a talk. No. All right, let's move on. I believe, Mitchell, Mitchell, I believe we have a Talk Back Tings. Is that correct? Yes, let's do it. You know, we like to play the weird shit we hear on radio between the host and caller. Actually, before I get into it, Mitch, I should tell you, I was trying to organise a surprise

guest for today, for your birthday. Someone who we've spoken about many times on Talk Back Tings. my god who mr john law oh the late great he's not dead mitchell the great john law i wanted to get him on and i actually locked it in it was going to be a phone call it was going to happen today but guess what what guess what john said to his producer who was organizing it who we Who we know. We know the producer. Oh, my God. What did he say?

He said, no, I don't want to speak to them on the telephone. I'd like to meet them. Bring them in studio. Oh, my God. So after lockdown's lifted, baby, we're going to see John Lawson. Oh, that's a great gift. Sam, come and put the painting in the trash. In the trolley.

What a brilliant gift, John Lawson. That's intimidating. I know. Imagine if he hates me Jong-ho. That's intimidating. I know. Imagine if he hates me as well, as well as Ty. We're also going to have to put you in a skirt because he'll probably think you're a woman. I was genuinely thinking that. I'm like, am I going to confuse him as a person? You 100% will.

There's a famous audio quote from Jong-ho where he says the best way to employ women is to put them in a very, very short skirt. That's the only way he'll have them in his team. Yeah. But that's an old myth because he has this running joke that, oh, all my handmaidens, that all my female producers must wear skirts. The guy that organized the interview with us, one of his producers, is a big old gay butt like us.

Yeah, I know. I know. So he's not in a skirt. I'll give you the tip. But good to know that he's open to two little poofs doing a podcast. I know. Apparently he made a point of saying, no, I don't want to speak to them on the phone. I want to meet them. Oh my God. I love that. Which makes me think, fuck, does he made a point of saying, no, I don't want to speak to them on the phone. I want to meet them.

Oh my God, I love that. Which makes me think, fuck, does he have a bone to pick? Does he listen to talk back to things? We're not always positive about him. Do you think he knows how to listen to a podcast? Nah, he would not know. No, I don't think so. Anyway, all right, what do we have today?

Is it John Laws related? No, it's not John Laws related. I'm going to cease fire on any John Laws content I feel like I'm going to bag in. Probably wise, yep. Until after we've met him. I'll do it behind his back. So today we're talking about the good old radio quiz, okay? Which I do on my show.

A quiz on radio, if you're not in the industry, because we are in radio, it's just a tried and true. You don't have to mansplain quizzes to people who aren't in radio. We know what a quiz is. No, but every radio show does a quiz. Jonesy and Amanda do a quiz, don't they? Magnificent Seven. Mag Seven.

I do the last quiz of the day. And sometimes they make it hard because there's a lot of money on the line or a big prize. But sometimes they're super easy because it's like the prize is nothing major, right? Correct, correct. But I think you'll find even easy quizzes, people stuff up. Okay. So first, I'm going to show you one of my faves. This happened on 2CH, you know, the old people music station in Sydney.

Love it, love it. This caller was trying to win, I think it was a CD, nothing major, and they clearly had no one else lined up because he really persisted with this one woman who got stuck on a very simple question. Here it is. It's 20 minutes past 5 o'clock, Sydney's 2CH. Ian Rogerson here with you on a very sunny Tuesday afternoon. And Jean Trotman joins us.

How are you, Jean? I'm very well. Thank you, Ian. Now, Jean, I want to give you some CDs, and all I need to do is for you to answer a question that's going to be, of course, in the $1,000 Minute tomorrow morning. Right. Which is the nearest star to Earth?

Now, just interrupting for a sec. You guys know the answer. The nearest star to Earth? Now, just interrupting for a sec, you guys know the answer, the nearest star to Earth? Is the sun. There we go. Okay, I was just making sure that it was obvious to everyone. It's the sun. It's the one you can freaking see all the time. Yeah, the biggest star, yeah. Nah, it wasn't obvious to Jean. I thought it was a trick question, but no.

Yeah, the sun. Now, think about it, Jean. Which is the nearest star to Earth? The moon. No, no, star, Jean. Which is the nearest star to Earth? The moon. No, a star. Star. Star. Think about it. It's up there.

I can see it right now. Oh, can you? Yeah. What do you think it'll be? It's very warm, that star that's keeping us warm at the moment, Jean. Mars. No, a star, not a planet. A star.

Oh, my brain's coddled today. We're looking at it right now. It rises in the morning and sets in the evening. Oh, the evening star. No, we're not going to get this. I know, Jean. No, I give up. The sun.

Oh, there you are. I've learned something today. You have, Jean. You certainly have. I'm going to send you a CD, all right? Thank you very much. Okay, have a great Arvo. See you.

Bye. We should get surprised for getting it wrong. I know. She's still got the prize even though she said the moon. The evening star. What does that even mean? She just made that up. Hold on.

But you know what? When you're on air, when you're live, the pressure is different. You freak out. Yeah. As in the caller or the host? Oh, not as the host. The callers freak out like there's no tomorrow. The amount of callers I get that get stage fright,

they're great off the air when I'm prepping them. I go, are you ready for the quiz? Oh, they're pumped. But you get them on air, oh, my God, they crumble. What happens? Is it just the knowledge that it's live and that whatever they say can't be undone? It's live, it's to air.

Also, they're talking to the host, not as much with me, but when you have Kyle and Jackie O or you're talking to a Jonesy and Amanda or a big talent. Or Mitch and Mitch. Or Mitch and Mitch. Oh, they go to pieces. They just melt. Yeah.

I see Sam's finger quivering over the button. Now. I really like you guys. Exactly right. There was one call on Jonesy and Amanda and they- Just one? Yeah, just one. Oh, yeah, you found her.

Yeah, you're listening. Yes. The question was something about name an Australian city, something, something, something, and they kept giving clues. And then Jonesy was like, please, just name any city. She couldn't name a city. Oh, you're kidding. Oh, God.

God love her. She's like, Brenda Barolinda starts making things up like you. She's like, oh, brain freeze. I'm doing a quiz on my show currently. Lil Nas X is sponsoring the show. Sony Music. Oh, that's good of him. Yeah.

That's so nice. Supporting fellow gays. Very sweet. And we're doing Lil Nas X, Y, Z, which is a spelling bee. And I thought, I'm going to trick the first ever person, and I'm going to make the first word tiger. So the first word was tiger. But I said to them, you have one question you can ask me

and one question only in the spelling bee, and that is to use it in a sentence. So use your lifelines wisely. Jenna, good evening. Spell tiger. All right. T-I-G-E-R. Wrong.

Next caller. What was it in a sentence? Oh, I'm glad you asked. My favourite rapper is tiger. Oh, you bitch. You know, Jenna, Mitch called was it in a sentence? Oh, I'm glad you asked. My favourite rapper is Tyga. Oh, you bitch. You know, Jenna, Mitch called me the other night and he goes, what's the word I can use for this spelling bee? Oh yeah, I called you.

And I said, anti-disestablishmentarianism. And he goes, that's too hard. But you fucked someone over with the wrong Tyga. It was for 500 bucks too, poor thing. God, lover. I wonder what she was thinking. No, that's how you spell Tyga. I hit that wrong. Now the next one, Sam, you might have actually, lover. I wonder what she was thinking. No, that's how you spell type. I'm getting that wrong.

Now, the next one, Sam, you might have actually heard this. You used to work at Triple M. This question is even easier. So it happened on Triple M, and they were giving away a motorbike, I believe. Wow. All you had to do to get in the draw was answer a very easy question about the band ACDC. Here's what happened. For the Harley Davidson 883 Sportster, it's all thanks to ACDC's new album, Stiff Upper Lip, and Fraser Motorcycles. Okay, hello, Triple M. Here's what happened. get one if I win it. Okay. When I win, I'm going to win it. You're going to win it, mate. You're going to win it. I like that confidence. Well, okay,

we're going to ask you a question, mate, before we can put you in the barrel. Yeah. Okay, spell A-C-D-C. A-D-A-C. I'm going to ask you again.

Hang on. How do you spell A-C-D-C? A-D-A-C. Mark. One more time, C. Mark. One more time, Mark. How do you spell A, C, D, C? I'll kill you in a minute.

Mark, just... Mark. Mark. Mark, yeah? Yeah, say A... How do you spell A, C... Spell A, C, D, C. How do you spell A, A, A, D, D, C?

A, A, D, A, A. I'm getting this all wrong. You are, Mark. Just spell A, C, D, C. A, D, D, A, A. I'm getting this all wrong. You are, Mark. Just spell ACDC. ADDC. You idiot, it's ACDC. AC, AC, ACDC. ACDC.

AC. Look, hold on a sec. ACDC. Just say that. ACDC. Yes! Yes! Mark, it wasn't that hard.

Okay, Mark, not only that, we're going to give you a copy of your favourite ACDC album. Do you have a favourite copy? Anything ADDC is good. That is, that just sounds set up. Oh, do you reckon? It was just too funny. It was too good. I can confirm 100% real.

Really? Really? Were you actually there when it happened? It sounded very old. It's one of the Hall of Fame things for Triple M. They real. Really? Yeah. Were you actually there when it happened? It sounded very old. It's one of the, like, Hall of Fame things for Triple M. They're very proud. Yeah. Poor bastard.

You know what? He was probably dyslexic. Because your dyslexia makes all your words get jumbled around. You can't spell. That's true. I didn't even think of that. Now I feel bad. No, I don't feel bad.

All you had to do was say the band's name, ACDC. But that's the thing. When someone says ACDC, you don't think it's a word. the band's name, ACDC. But that's the thing. When someone says ACDC, you don't think it's a word. Like A-S-E-E-D-E-E-S-E-E, you know, like ACDC. Yeah, right, I'm with you.

Thank you. I struggle to keep up with that. Sorry, Zane. It's hard to be honest. I know, right? It's my fucking birthday. You do the talking. But anyway, these people struggled to answer rather easy trick questions, and we thought, okay, who is the most intelligent university educated bitch on our team?

The answer is Jenna. So we're going to hit you with a couple of what I think are easy trick questions. See if you hoity-toity educator type can figure it out. Mitch, is there any quiz music or something you can get me? I mean, I can get, why don't we, should we use the quiz music I use for my show, last quiz of the day? Oh, I thought something a little bit more old school.

Like, you know that, what's that, is it Jeopardy or something? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What about this? What about this? This is nice. We could do this. Oh, yeah, this works.

All right, Jenna. I'm scared. Yes. What gets wetter the more it dries? Now, come on, Jane. Come on, Jada. What gets wetter the more it dries?

Correct. Think about it. Maybe we should do a bloody 20 second on the clock thing, Mitch. We could be here all fucking day. Yeah, Jenna, you've got 15 seconds, I'd say. Yeah, bring up your fancy countdown sound effects, would you?

What gets wetter the more it dries? No. Hit us. Oh, she looks like she's got a migraine now. Just take a guess. Her eyebrows and forehead are all screwed up. She's got no idea.

It's a towel. A towel. The more you use it to dry something, it gets wetter. Get it? All right, next one, Mitchell. What word is spelled incorrectly in every single dictionary? Incorrectly. Oh, she got that one.

Oh, yeah. Well done. Our little genius. Correct. That's not our tick. No, it's not. We're the Idjim tick. Because I'm on the show page.

Too many movements happening. Oh, fuck it. Forget about it. All right, next one. Next one. All right, this one's in your wheelhouse, Jenna. The answer. If I drink, I die.

If I eat, I'm fine. What am I? Would you be able to repeat it? Oh, shut that thing up, Mitch. Oh, okay. It's been paused. Okay, you ready? Yes. If I drink, I die.

If I eat, I'm fine. What am I? What is it? A fire. You're an arsonist. It was either a fire or mass murder. Also, could you like maybe, I'm sorry to be selfish, but could you like think out loud?

Because the silence is very deafening. No. It's just like no one can see you. It's going on in my head. She's just straining. I can't. Yeah, you should see her. It's like her eyebrows are trying to meet each other.

Her forehead looks very strained. It's like someone's got a lead pencil and they're slowly jabbing her in the knee. She's like straining. I can't. Yeah, you should see her. It's like her eyebrows are trying to meet each other. Her forehead looks very strained. It's like someone's got a lead pencil and they're slowly jabbing her in the knee. She's like, oh. All right. Come on, Jenna. You can still win this. One out of three so far, dumbass. All right.

Shut up. All right. Come on, Jenna. You're the smartest one here. You should get this. This is a bit of a long one. Okay, ready? If it takes eight men ten hours to build a wall, how long does it take four men?

Ten hours, did you say? Yeah. Five hours. Incorrect, because the wall is already built. It takes no time. Oh, I didn't. The eight guys already made it, so why would the other four need to make another one? Come on, if you win this, Jenna, it's worth a thousand points and you'll win the whole competition.

A thousand points for what? Oh, the contest. Like fly-by points? What are we talking? Yeah, everyday rewards. Okay. Is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? Is it legal?

For a man to marry his widow's sister? Yeah. No, because he is dead. Legal. For a man to marry his widow's sister. Yes. No, because he is dead. It would be quite hard to marry someone, Jenna. He's widow's sister. He's dead. He's widow. But couldn't it be she's dead?

I thought she's dead. No, his widow is the lover he left behind. Is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? Can a man be widowed as well? Yeah. Maybe he's gay. Is it legal for a man to marry his widow's sister? Can a man be widowed as well? Yeah. Maybe he's gay. I don't give a fuck. Oh, yeah.

Widow's sister. Yeah, widow's sister. Don't question me on the trick questions. I didn't write them. That was a trick. Anyway, Jenna, it's nice to know that you're as stupid as us. Yep. I got one.

Well done. Thank you. Wow. People freak out under pressure. Casey. I can't even breathe. Jenna is so tense. Yeah, if we learn nothing about putting Jenna under pressure, it never works.

It never does. It never works. It always fails. If we'd given her like an hour to do that exam, we'd have slayed it. All right, we should probably go, guys. Yeah, let's get out of here. Let's leave. Yeah, I know.

Poor Jenna. Now, this is our last show for a little bit. We're taking a couple of weeks break. Yeah, you know, we're not wrapping the season or anything We're just going to take a little bit of time off and then be back And then soldier on to the end of the year We have done continuous shows since, was it May, Mitch? Yes, and you know

Really reaped the rewards financially as well Well, Mummy and Daddy have to take a break With all the newfound wealth We're going to the Hamiltons No, we can't go on holidays We can't fucking travel Thank you for making my birthday so special everyone Pleasure

Because I don't know what I'm going to do to be honest I have nothing else planned Well my birthday was spent on our Instagram live Sunday night Oh yeah Will this be an honorary birthday Instagram live this week I'll be sick it won't be happening Alright everyone a pleasure Thank you for listening to 86.

We'll see you in a couple weeks. Stay safe. Look after yourselves. Catch you soon. We'll chat to you soon. Love you, babe. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches.

Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to AD Debrief. This is our secret segment on the end. We pretend we're gone. Hopefully most people stop listening because then we reveal the shameful side of us. We just be a bit rogue, a bit feral. No. Stop it. What a cunt.

Yeah, I said it. You can't say that. No. He's your mate, apparently. Oh, I say that to everyone. Does he still follow you on Instagram? No, he unfollowed me. Oh.

I didn't know he ever followed you. He followed me to start. When I first interviewed him, he had like 300 followers. Oh, that's right. He worked in a phone shop. He worked at Verizon in the Valley. And we were bonding. He's like, thank you so much.

I've never done a radio interview before. Oh, my God. And did you do your big hype up? Like, oh, we love you, man. You're incredible. We'll chat soon, right? All that stuff. It's like, thank you so much. I've never done a radio interview before. Oh my God. And did you do your big hype up? Like, oh, we love you, man. You're incredible. We'll chat soon, right? All that stuff. It's so believable. You're good at that stuff. What would you say? Oh shit, hold on. It's Macy Gray. What? It's Macy Gray. All right. Well, you better take that. I have to take the interview.

All right. Oh no, it's Ella Hooper, actually. Sorry. It says Macy Gray because that's the last masked singer person. Do you want to talk to Ella Hooper? No, I have nothing to say to her. I'll just put a cut here. I'll just take it. Hello, Ella Hooper! Hey, you guys. Thanks for having me. Hey, well, you were brilliant. Great to see you on

our tellies and looking forward to the new music. Send it our way and we'll give it a spin when it's out. I definitely will. Thanks. Thank you so much. We'll talk soon, okay? And then we'll rock it a spin, all right, when it's out. I definitely will. Thanks. Thank you so much. We'll talk soon, okay? And on Ruckus. See you. See you, Legend.

Bye. Bye. She was lovely. Yeah. That's nice. She was on The Masked Singer. Oh. And you did it again.

All the hype up I was just talking about. Oh, you're incredible. We love you a lot. And I was about to ask, if I was a guest on your show, we'd never met, how would you introduce me and how would you speak to me? Oh, that's good. All right. Let me really replicate what would happen. Because you're so good at blowing smoke up people's arse

and it sounds genuine. I would sound condescending if I did it. Hello. You're so amazing, Rebecca Gibney. Oh, my God. All right, let's try. Ready? This is how I'd introduce you if you're on my show.

Okay. This is Kiss. Happy Wednesday night. It's Mitchell Midnight, live across the country. Coming up, last quiz of the day. Five questions. You'd have to be an idiot to get any of them wrong. In the meantime, oh, I'm very excited for this.

Honest to God. I am a little bit nervous, too, because someone that I follow in the digital world is in here in the studio with me now. A superstar on your screens and an up-and-coming rising star, Mitchell Coombs joins us. Hello, buddy. Hi. Thanks for having me.

God, it must be crazy to think that there are, well, there'd have to be hundreds of thousands of people in the world following you. Millions, yeah. But isn't it weird when you go through drive-thrus and whatnot, you're like, that person could well and truly follow me. Oh, it's happened a few times. Not all the time, though. Tell me the worst. Tell me the worst.

Oh, no, there's no bad ones. It's just like it's always when I'm looking my worst. Whatever, I'm dressed like a piece of shit. They recognize me. Listen, I love you, buddy. And I think your videos are, I mean, I follow so many accounts. And it's like you sort of, they don't cut through, but your videos do.

Thank you. I think you're one to watch. So it was great to have you on and you're welcome anytime. Oh, thank you. Yeah, no, I'd love to come back. This is great. Brilliant. That's Mitchell Coombs here at Kiss, guys.

Coming up we're going to talk about the death of one of the biggest music icons in the country. It's an emotional day. Sorry, your mic's been turned off. I think you'll find it hasn't. What a shit panel. I'm never coming back. We've got Lady Gaga on the air next, talking about Ed Sheeran.

Who's dead? Ed Sheeran. Someone's dead. Yeah. Did you believe it? I thought you could have done better. I didn't feel that warm inside. Like, oh, my God, you're so talented.

You're amazing. You're life-changing. No, it's not that. Sam produced me all last week. Even Sabrina Carpenter, you just throw anything at them. I thought you looked tired. You've just been producing him for a week. I was spending a week just in an enclosed space

and now it's fine. I interviewed a football player that I knew nothing about, remember, Sam? I was shocked at how well you did that because I also want to point out you did a football chat at the beginning of the week where you got literally every single possible thing wrong. Oh, that doesn't

surprise me. I was like, are you nervous about playing in the pool this time around? How do you feel? Is your racket oiled or does it get oiled for you? Alright man, must be nice to get back out on the pitch. Now, do you bring your own bat or do they provide it for you? But yeah, look, that's my one and only job really, to just fluff

people up. Professional fluff-a-rapper and music talker, so that's it. Yeah, wow. I hope you enjoyed it though, to be honest. Very good. Which is why Ty Verdes is friends of you and not me. No. What a freak. No. Now listen, we've had a few messages asking why we've stopped playing A-OK as our closing music.

And there's a bit of a story there, OK? Basically, in a nutshell, I'll do some trained horse shit. It won't be a long story. We shook on it, in essence. And we agreed to a certain price. And we were like, yep, we're good to start using it. And then we'll deal with the paperwork later. Because of copyright we got the go ahead yes yes um from someone in his team and then more and more people started getting looped into this email chain and then they started

saying oh no that price point is far too low this is actually quite a compliment especially for a podcast that gets as many listeners as theirs. They should be paying way more. I was like, hey, bitch, you don't get rich by spending willy nilly. That's right. And anyway, it just started to escalate a bit. And I was like, okay, let's just kill it. And so we stopped using it. And I'm like, right, what do we do?

What's the plan B? Because, you know, there are some ways to get around paying for copyright, you know. Either we review the song every week, which we can't do. Like, we have to give an opinion about the song every single week. No, thanks. Which they'd probably see right through. Or you are allowed to use songs if you're repurposing them, putting your own creative flair on them.

Yeah. For, like, a parody, for example. And so I've taken one for the team, guys. Yes, I am going to prison. Are you okay? She's just revealing that she's going to take it for us. That's very nice. You really ruined my build up here.

I've taken one for the team and I've done a parody version of A-OK. Yes. Because if we can't use the main song as our outro music, then we might just have to use my version, which is very similar. It's basically the gronky version. So instead of A-OK, it's I'll Be Right. Okay, yep. Yep. You guys haven't heard this yet?

No, we haven't. I think it's amazing. I think it's far better than Ty's original song, my gronky version. Big call to hit. Yes, it is. But mine will be too. When I was like rephrasing it, because you can't use the exact lyrics, copyrighted, I

just like rephrase a couple of things, but it's basically the same song. Like instead of saying, you know, what does he say? My head up in outer space. I changed that. And you know how he mentioned lemonade. Yeah, I put my own spin on it anyway. I have it here. Is this it?

This is the... Yeah, put it over there on your desk. And Sam, if you'd like to come in and be a judge as well, so you can review the song. And feel free to say no, we're not using this as closing music. I already think I have my answer. Can I have a top up? Yeah, of course. Yeah, to celebrate your new single.

My new single. I'll be right. You're like a drag queen. Drag queens love to release a single. Jenna? At least they talk on mic. I'm excited for this. Shall we play?

The world premiere. Yeah, prepare to be blown away. World premiere of new music by Mitchell Coombs. Yep. This is, what's the title? I'll be right. And once you've figured out the lyrics, feel free to sing along, please. Okay, all right.

I'm sure it'll be self-explanatory. Sam, are you there? I am. Mic three. Mic three. Sorry, Sam is in this. Just had to move to the tiny trolley. Oh, no, that's fine. Mic three. Mic three. Sorry, Sam is in this. Just had to move to the tiny trolley. Oh, no, that's fine.

Mic three. Sam is on. Am I though? I don't think he is. No. Says mic three. Yeah, I'm not here. Oh, mic three.

Mercury Retrograde, the tech fart. Oh, of course. Swap over. What number? Let's do mic five. That was great radio, guys. Great radio. Brand new music out of Mitchell Coombs.

Internet sensation and pop star. This is I'll Be Right. Ready to play? Yeah. Here we go. Hit it. World premiere. Shut up, Siri.

I'm singing. Oh! Cockpits bits I love it already Here we go darling Living on this big ass earth With me head in the galaxy Get it? I know I'll be fucking, fucking right I reckon I'll be fucking, fucking right

Better, so far I feel like I've fallen apart I make a lemon meringue tart Get it? I know I'll be fucking, fucking right Better, so far. Get it? Lemon, hey. Better or worse? Oh, it's already better. I love it.

Everyone sing it. I reckon I'll be fucking, fucking right. Tie. Verdict. Could never eat your heart out. Far for fucking right. Oh, oh, oh, oh. Far for fucking right. Far for fucking right.

We can be far for fucking right. Motherfucker. Oh! Now I think you'll get a much better pep in your step after listening to this every podcast

than Ty Verdes' shit. How much will you charge us for royalties? Nothing. I've got enough. Wow. Wow. See what I did there

with the lemon thing? Yeah, yeah. Very, very smart. I reckon I'll be fuckin' fucking right. I reckon I'll be fucking, fucking right. Here we go. Fucking, fucking right. Yep, so that's where it fades out. Wow, wow.

I love it. Very good. I love it. I know, right? All right, there's only one person that can decide whether or not this gets usage in our show. The one person and one person only is Ty Verdes. What's your verdict?

No. Don't. No, sorry, Sam can be fully in charge. You can all have a say. Well, then why don't I start? Sam can be the final deciding factor. Beautiful. And although I think it is better than the original.

Sorry. Sparkling rose. That's fine. No, you know what? It's a yes from me. It's a yes. Thank you, Marta. I vote yes.

Yeah, I vote I'd like it to end the show every week. One yes. Jenna. I liked it. But. But. It's not as good as the original. I'm sorry.

I said no. Oh, no, he looks angry. I'd like to see you do a better job. Okay. That's fine. 50-50. That's how the world works. Mitchell, of course, you're skipped because you are the artist.

Yes, I am. No, imagine on Australian Idol, Jess Malboy being like, hi, I'm at my audition. I say yes. What do you guys reckon? I'm just going to let myself through. Mark Colden, it's a yes from me. Dicko, it's a yes from me.

Jessica, yeah, it's a yes from me. All right, Sam. On the voice, they're like, I know none of you clowns turn, but I'm going through anyway. Deal with it. Go, Sam. You have the deciding vote. Will we use Mitch's she'll be right?

I'll be right. I'll be right. Sorry, the branding needs to be strengthened. As our closing music for the rest of eternity. The one problem that I have, because despite the glorious harmonies... Oh, you noticed? I did!

I did! Look at you go. Oh, Sam, you'll know exactly what I'm talking about. I was just going to do a shitty parody like I do on my Instagram all the time. But you know when you just kind of get sucked in to this project you've set yourself and you just pay way more attention than it deserves? I was like, it needs harmonies. It needs echoes. I spent way too much time on it.

Look at you living your best lockdown life. Clearly, yeah. And despite the creativity. I'm so sorry. Because it's down to Ty Verdes and I think the answer would be... Shut up, Ty! I've heard enough from you! You're out, Mitch.

What was the reason? He doesn't deserve his song even in a parody space to be played on this podcast. He was a dick. Oh, I like that angle, yeah. I don't even like a parody of his song playing. That's a good point.

He doesn't need it. Yep. No. No, Ty Verdes, no Mitchell Coombs hit song. Ah, well. What can you do? We don't need a fucking closer. We're not a musical podcast.

I know. It was good while it lasted, the A-OK thing, but, you know, didn't fancy going to court. Oh, imagine us in court. Now, the weird thing is when we originally pitched He Was A Nobody and then the email thread started to build, the bigger his profile got. Yeah, more and more people were like, hey, this song's growing, you should pay more.

And I was like, shove it in your ass, I'll make me own. Well, you know, they were very powerful people. They made mistakes. Every time that song comes on air, I just forget to back announce it. That's the only time you do dead air on Kiss. You're just like, yeah. No, I just give the station branding. They pay me my bills.

I go, this is Kiss. Right now it's the quiz. That's it. Don't give him any credit. I can't tell if we're joking or not, if we're actually hating him. Because I was like, oh, I felt a bit off put by the fact that he wasn't agreeing with anything. But I feel like everyone's, no one's reassuring me that I was wrong. Was I not overthinking it?

Was that accurate? He was actually being a dog to me. I need to do this one more time. It's quite tiring when you're doing a nine to five, coming home and then doing what you actually want to do. It's like, oh, I've just been doing things all day. A common opinion. Yeah, you know what?

It's not. Oh, shut up. Everyone in the world hates to work. So why would he say no? Because it's not as like, oh, it's different than that. It's just not. No. No.

Yeah, there was no gentle letdown, was there? No. What was that last one? The last one was the best one. So I feel like a lot of your old hits would be getting a bit of traction now, right? People are just finding out about you. No. Because that is just a fact.

People go back and listen to our first episodes if they discover our show now. It is a fact of life. I also used an example. I said Lizzo's song Good As Hell came out in 2016. It wasn't a hit until 2019. So sometimes when a big song happens, they go back and find old shit that is also good

that didn't get the recognition it should have at the time. No. No. So what he's saying is that no, none of the success is bleeding over. Yeah. Yeah. That's a self burn. No. No. So what he's saying is that, no, none of the success is bleeding over. Yeah. Yeah. That's a self burn.

Those are rare. Yeah. That is a self burn. Yeah. Anyway, Ty. You're always welcome, buddy. We love your work. Always welcome.

And Ty, I'm a big fan. Chat to you soon, man. Okay? Chat to you soon, buddy. Okay? See you, man. See you, buddy. Truly shocking.

Anyway. There you go, Mitchell. I thought that your song was very good. Yeah. Thank you. You had my back, darling. Of course there you go, Mitchell. I thought your song was very good. Yeah, thank you. You had my back down. Yeah, of course. Unlike these two turncoats. Yeah, bastards.

I'm sorry. Jenna failed the quiz, so she's in the mood. I tried my hardest. I got one right. Let's move on. Can you spell assassin? That was my first word in the spelling bee. I don't want to do this again.

Try it. Just try it. Assassin. A-S-S A-S-I-N You missed one S. I was wondering whether it was another S. It's arson.

You weren't wondering. You don't have enough space in your brain to con to that thought. I was. You're the dummy! No, you're right. Sorry, I just caught eye of my gift again. I saw her. I saw her. You're the dummy. Yeah. No, you're right. I am. Sorry, I just caught eye of my gift again.

That is wonderful. The Dot Wiggins picture. I'll pop it on the Instagram in a couple of inches. Make sure you check it out. And my trolley too. Yep. Where am I going to put her in the house? I know.

A picture of yourself as an old woman. I'm not really sure if that would fly in the bedroom. Do you think the first time I do drag, Dot is my drag queen? Yes, absolutely. And it's just old woman drag. Oh, but you'd make a fabulous young woman as well. Do you think I'd make a fabulous young woman? If you were in drag, it's a bit of fun. What kind of young woman would I be

in drag? Whoever you want to be, Talyn. I feel like we're getting an Ursula Carlson vibe. Oh, yeah! Oh, my God. Or Magda. It could be Magda. Funny people. I don't think I've ever seen her with long hair looking like overtly drag queen-y, though.

So I don't know if she's a good person to aim towards. No, Ursula's good. That's a good pick. She gets all dolled up in the Masked Singer. You could be it. Yeah, you could be that. Or Beyonce. I get that a lot.

Thank you for a great birthday episode, guys. Yeah, you're welcome. Oh, I forgot, actually. You know how I always say that it's not a birthday without cake? I decided to leave it to the end so you didn't fucking eat the whole podcast. You get so many complaints. Jenna, go fetch, please. And I still managed to have

half a block of chocolate throughout recording. I know. Wow! Yep, so she'll run and get the cake. Thanks, Jenna. She could have said, no worries. Welcome. We're just running to get the cake. No worries.

We're across it. Thank you. She's off. Can't believe she's my 2IC. What a dimwit. Oh, bless her. Yeah, that was a good show, guys. Appreciate it.

Yeah. Yeah. And I've got you in IOU with John Laws. That's something. I'm happy with that. And remember we said no more guests on the birthday episodes. Well, there's also no one I can think of to get because you've spoken to most singers you like.

And I don't know what shows you're watching. I can't think of any actors to try and get. So I wasn't going to do what you did for me and get all these surprise guests. But I'm like, John Laws is someone he definitely wouldn't have spoken to. No, never. It'll happen. It'll happen. Wow.

We have to go into the fortress of irreverent logic. That's what he calls his studio. Really? That's very funny. Oh, Jenna's got the cake. Oh, it's hidden in a bag. Would you like to do the onus? I guess.

You could have just given it to him, but sure. All right. Here you go. It's in a tote bag. Yeah. It's just a little one, so you don't have to cart it home. You know how annoying that is? Yeah.

Here we go. Look. Oh, it's gorgeous. Red velvet. It's a little little one so you don't have to cut at home. You know how annoying that is? Yeah. Here we go. Look. Oh, it's gorgeous. Red velvet. It's a little red velvy. Jenna, I don't suppose you had the common sense to bring a knife? Oh, dear. Oh, that's very pretty.

Oh, it's cute. No, no, no. Look at that. So we can finger it if you'd like. Jenna, you're going to have to go get a knife. I'm getting a knife. I'm going to go get a knife. Jenna's gone to get a knife.

Do we all want a slice now? Why not? Maybe not while we're on the podcast. Yeah, okay. Well, we can wrap up. What a pleasure. Thank you, everyone. I'm just getting a knife.

Okay. Do you find it awkward at your birthday party when people make speeches and you have to make a speech? I shouldn't have to make one at my own party. I don't think I ever have. Like a thank you. Oh, I can't recall if I ever have done that. Most of my parties are just kind of like, hey, everyone, come hang out and then go when you want.

There's no real formalities. No, I more mean like big milestone birthdays. Oh. Guys, guys, it's so exciting. Well, I mean, it's just been, Mitch, I mean, I've known you for so long now. And I mean, I think I think I can say for everyone that's here that it's just such an exciting time that we could all be here together for your birthday.

Shut up, it's fiction. And then I'm here thinking, just cut the cake, I want that fucking cake. Shut up. And I remember this, oh my God, I have to tell this story. What is that? I remember the time that I, no, you remember, you remember the time that I...

Spit it out, bitch, you remember the time. And I'm not even paying attention. Yeah. No, remember the time that you and Stacey... Oh, I love Stacey. Don't you remember Stacey? Then there's a 40-minute speech about Stacey. Yeah, shit story.

Yeah, so shit story. You go through the whole thing. Yeah, no one's listening. Sam might have been at one of my recent birthdays when instead of doing speeches, they all decided to take turns roasting me. I was there. Were you there?

I was there as well. Oh, I'm just used to you being in our show. Stop fingering the cake. Make sure that's your slice. Thank you. Yeah, they all just roasted me and I was like, you know what? That's kind of fitting. I was there as well.

It was your last birthday. Yeah. While that rat's not here, whose present did you prefer? Quick, she's coming. Mine or Jenna's? Yours, yours, yours. Yes. Of course.

It's a fucking trolley. I adore. I adore. Welcome back, Jenna. prefer? Quick, she's coming. Mine or Jenna's? Yours, yours, yours. It's a fucking trolley, bitches. I adore. Welcome back, Jenna. Speaking of door, here she is. There are no knives in this building, so I got some fun. I'll find that hard to believe that you're not carrying a weapon on you,

Jenna. No, that's my own personal one, which I'd rather not. She's like, oh yeah, use my shiv. I apologise. Listen, we don't have to eat it, yeah, you eat my shiv. I apologise. Listen, we don't have to eat it now. We can eat it after. I want to. Actually, no, not on the podcast.

You're right. People hate it. It's absolutely disgusting. The only person that can decide if we'll eat the cake is Ty. Should we eat it? No. Okay. Thanks, Ty.

If you said yes, I would have. Imagine if you said, Ty, people say that you're a cunt. Do you disagree? No. That's interesting. People say your mum is a bitch and is a lizard woman. Do you disagree? No.

Whoa. That's a revelation. And you got your second vax? Yeah. Yesterday. Why do I keep doing it the day before the fucking podcast? I always feel a bit dozy. Are you tired? Yeah. Yeah. Especially this morning. I had a fucking doing it the day before the fucking podcast? I always feel a bit dozy. Are you tired?

Yeah. Yeah. Especially this morning. I had a fucking headache and the arms are a bit achy. But I haven't packed a thing for moving, by the way. Oh my God. I can't believe that. I was like, oh, sore arm.

I just won't pack. Oh, I'm leaving it so late. Are you getting help from anyone? Yeah. No, good. You'll be all right. Yeah. I can't even help you.

Not that I will. Oh, because you would have loved to. No, I could have. You actually can. Isn't that one of the reasons you're allowed to leave the house for helping someone move? Yeah, you are. Oh, isn't that good news, Mitch? You can come help.

No. Not happening. Moving is such a pain in the ass. What do you do with all the delicates? You have to wrap them in newspaper? What a waste of newspaper. I've got quite a few newspapers to try and get rid of. So, yeah.

Remember that subscription I got coerced into because the call operator kept flirting with me. Sam warned me. He goes, if you ever try and cancel Daily Telegraph, they make it real hard. If you call them and try and cancel it, you can't do it online. You have to call them. They will guilt trip you out of it. And it worked. He flirted with me.

And so now I've got all these fucking newspapers still in the plastic that I've never read. Yeah, I know. Because I came to your house and there were 17 copies of my Stella interview. I thought, he loves me. Just the one, mate. I only get one copy. I thought there were two.

Cute. We have our seal and it's like getting dust on it. Hayden's like, we need to frame that. I'm like, let's hope that it's not my only interview. We don't need to frame it. Imagine pinging that up, being like, my one interview. Yeah, well, you've got a Dot Wiggins frame now, so that's obviously much more.

Oh, I know, I know. You know? Yep. That should take centre spot on the ornament. Oh, well. Do you actually know where you're going to put it? No, I was thinking maybe you enter the house, like, on the left, so it's not haunting, so I don't wake up in the middle of the night

and see this woman hanging on the wall. Yeah, I'm saying don't put that in the room. Like, that'll be a major turn off. Yeah. Like, if Hayden's struggling to keep it up, that'll bring it down for life. Why not ever? Jesus Christ. Solid hairline.

I feel like it could be a good bathroom decorative item. Oh, above the toilet. Don't put her in the bathroom. She'll get all foggy. No, people say that. Foggy. People say you put your best art in the bathroom because everyone sees it because all your guests go to the bathroom when they're over.

Yeah, and you've got to stare at it there's like this forced moments slightly to the left of the television yeah next to the mirror it also doesn't have one of those standard frame things where you can just like flip the little you know the stand on the back of it with normal frames i said where's that and he goes no it's too big for that and too heavy so you can only hang it i was like. He has to hang it on a wall. Our rental lets us do that. We can put up the 3M stickers. Look at that.

You look great in that picture, Mitchell. Don't I ever. It's like looking back five years. And the air rollers. I never pictured Dot to have rollers, but now I can't unsee. Makes sense, yeah. And her eyebrows flaring upwards very thinly. Oh, I adore it. Anyway, it's on our Instagram.

This means nothing to no one who can't see it right now. We're just talking about visuals. We'll put a photo up. All right, let's wrap. Talk on mic, please. I've got to go celebrate my birthday. No, I've got to go celebrate. So we should go get a cake to eat.

We've got to figure out how to cut the bar. I know, right? Jenna, surely you've got a shiv on you. Oh, her nails. Just slice it with your pinky. Oh, yeah, I can do that. Sing! Alright, let's go. We will see you next week. Thank you for being here. No, we won't see you next week. Yeah, back in a couple of

weeks, but you know, we won't be gone even long enough for you to miss us, guys. Calm down. And there's 85 other episodes for you to binge while we're gone, so have a listen and leave us a five-star review, because when we get back, we'll do some more mug giveaways and we'll have definitive updates on the summer merch line, which is coming pretty soon.

I can't believe we're wrapping. I just got back. Yeah, I know. Oh, yeah. I know. Blink of an eye, it's over. By the time we come back, we may be out of lockdown. Depends how many weeks we take.

Yeah, potentially. What's the first thing you want to do after lockdown starts to ease? Go to a restaurant. Go to a restaurant. I want to go to a restaurant. I want to order food, get some drinks and just get the food brought to me. I don't want to eat out of plastic containers on my couch. Over it.

Over it. I wouldn't mind a fuck. Yeah. Yeah. I've had that. I can donate blood now. Wow. It's been that long.

Is that related? Oh, no. It's been that long. Is that related? No, it is related because if you've had gay sex, you can't donate blood. But because it's been more than three months, I now can't. Which is such a ridiculous, homophobic law. As if we would all be carrying around AIDS in our blood. Yeah. That's disgusting.

I thought that joke would be funny. You took it down a dark route. You've gone all bloody talkback on me as if we have AIDS in our blood. We might. We should do a test. Just to make sure. Live AIDS test. Where do you see that segment going?

If it's yes, you've got AIDS. If it's no, the biggest anticlimax segment ever. Yeah, but if it's no, we can reveal it as in that's how you find out if you have AIDS. Last time I had a test, I was all clear and I have

not rooted since, so I'm good. So yeah, you actually could. I didn't realise they lifted that. So if you haven't had sex, is it three months? Yeah. No, I don't think that was like they lifted it. It's always been that way. Oh, okay. Got it, got it. But most people are very sexually active, so they just say, gays can't donate blood.

Yeah. As a general rule. I think the three-month thing's always been there. So are you going to do it or are you just like having the option? No, that was just emphasising my point. Been a while since I've, yeah, anyway. Had it. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Doesn't matter. Anyone that'll do it or are you going to hop on an app maybe? I don't have anyone like lined up. Come on, people have fucks lined up. Yeah. Doesn't matter. Anyone that'll do it or are you going to hop on an app maybe? I don't have anyone like lined up. Come on, people have fucks lined up. Yeah. Jenna? Yeah. Yeah.

A few. Jenna! As if. Jenna lives next door to the COVID hospital. Yeah. You can get some real funds. Do you reckon Jenna would date someone older than her or younger than her? Older.

Older. Yeah, like 80. Closer to my age. No, I actually think. 75. I actually think you'd date someone bang on your age. Which we don't know what that is. God, no.

No, goodness me. Yes. No, no, no, no. I swear to fuck, I'm not making this up. I thought she was 26 when I met her in 2016. Yeah, I don't know why. And then the other year when she was like, oh, I'm turning 26. I was like, crap-ish.

Yeah. I remember you being that age when I met... No. We don't question it. See, I've been so honest and transparent about my age because I've been, you know, doing well. I'm like, yeah, I'm fucking 24, yeah, I'm 25. But now I'm 26. I'm like, oh.

We should fact check her date of birth. Jenna, where's your license? Oh, wait. Doesn't drive. Jenna, where's your birth cloth? Doesn't even have a certificate. No, it's etched on a rock somewhere. We'll never find it.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ding, ding, ding. Three. Just three. No'll never find it. Three. Just three. No thousands before it. Just three. Written in the blood of your placenta oils. Wow.

That's horrific. Sorry. You know, I had a friend who ate her placenta after she gave birth. Apparently they're actually really good for you. Yeah, full of nutrients. Like some people get the placenta, the afterbirth for those and they take it to someone who turns them into

capsules. Yes, they dry it. Not air fry it. They dehydrate it. And then they turn it into little capsules and apparently it does wonders for your skin and stuff but I can't think of anything worse. It's nutrient rich. It's full of stem cells. It's the baby's lifeblood.

Put the fucking moisturiser on. You don't need to eat that shit. Yeah, but you know what's in moisturiser? Baby foreskin. Wow. Because baby's foreskins, when they get circumcised, don't get thrown out. They get sent to pharmaceutical groups.

Nivea are waiting at the door with a viro bag. They've got Nivea and Dove just both like punching each other out being like, no, this one's mine. Shoddy. It's like baby formula, but it's baby bloody foreskin. Oh, I remember. Wow, tangents galore today. But it's my birthday.

I remember when I worked at Coles, the baby formula wars had begun. I worked in the glory days when no one gave a shit about baby formula. Yeah, what happened? Why did that become a thing? In China, mainland mainland china there was a big big big thing um where someone poisoned the feed of the baby food and then all these babies died and got really sick um because all the baby formula was poisoned it was horrific so no one trusts the the baby formula companies in china also the quality is really low it's basically

like milk powder right so they started getting the aussie stuff sent over because it's so cheap for them and it's so nutrient rich. We have such strict laws in Australia. It's like it must be pure, pure, pure. But in China, the laws of lax and the worry. It sounded like you were doing a gunshot sound effect. Pure, pure, pure. The babies.

Pure, pure, pure. And, yeah, they love it. But they would just buy a bulk and send it back, which is genius, right? But we had to put a ban in two per customer. But people would come in, buy two, leave, come back 10 minutes later and buy two and then come back 10 minutes later. And we had to like identify them and go, sir, you bought four NAN Gold 101 Plus today. You have to leave the store.

And they go, no, I didn't, no, I didn't, no, I didn't. Now that makes sense. I literally watched a scene in Wentworth yesterday where someone went to jail. They ended up in Wentworth prison for buying 18 cans of baby formula. I was like, what's the issue? There's a limit. I didn't know that limit was enforced by law. There's two.

I thought it was just Coles management being like, wait your turn. You know, code orange doesn't exist. That means that there's a theft going on in the self-checkout. And everyone needs all the money. At the self-checkout? Like they're just bashing the thing, trying to get money out of it. No, they're stealing an item. Stealing steak.

Oh, right. Double bagging, like trying to get away with something. Shit, I probably sparked a few code oranges during my poor uni student days. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Avocados. No, that's a green apple.

I've done that before. All right, let's go. Thank you for the birthday show, everyone. Cake is here if you'd like. I've been eyeing it all this whole time. Someone find a knife. And I've been fingering the frosting. Surely Jackie O's got a cutlery set over there for when birthday show, everyone. Cake is here if you'd like. I've been eyeing it all this whole time. Someone find a knife. And I've been fingering the frosting. Surely Jackie O's got a cutlery set over there for when she has her breakfast.

Is there some knives over there? There's nothing. All right. We'll work it out off the air. Thank you for listening, guys. We'll see you in a couple weeks. We adore you. Stay safe.

Go get vaxxed. And yeah, we'll see you soon. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today. Are we still using the catchphrase even though we've banned Tie for Life? No. Well, I don't give a fuck if you feel better or not. Yeah. Deal with your own shit.

Screw you all. Thanks for listening. Love you. Bye. See you guys. Bye. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches.

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