Is It Just Me? - #91: Jenna interviews Jess Mauboy

Episode Date: November 22, 2021

It's a big week on the show, dullen!In this episode:Celeb kitchens (05:43)Is it possible to climax without ejaculating? (12:05)Tinder Fairytales & Fizzers (19:40)Are young people in a rush to grow... up? (31:15)Jenna’s AWKWARD interview with Jessica Mauboy (34:59)Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (50:23)Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 People do some weird shit. Television legend Kerri-Ann Kennelly fell several metres from a trapeze while performing in the musical Pippet. That's right, you dog. Some things make more sense than others. Ring Pike's Nurseries. What nursery? Pike's P-Y-K-E-S. P-Y-A.
Starting point is 00:00:23 K as in kill. P-Y-A. K as in kill. P-Y-E. K! Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood. Why is being alive so expensive? I'm not even having a good time. This is Is It Just Me?
Starting point is 00:00:41 Hosted by a couple of Mitches. What about me? Don't forget Kenner. Who? Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coos. Oh, but 91 up the bum, hello, Mitchell Coos. Oh, you've used that rhyme before. I haven't done 91 up the bum. You used 81 up the bum.
Starting point is 00:00:57 There's so many other words that rhyme with one, for God's sake. I'm so predictable. I should have gone 91. Attila the Hun was awful. And made it political. I like that. Good. 91, no one should have gone 91. Attila the Hun was awful. And made it political. I like that. Good. 91.
Starting point is 00:01:06 No one should own a gun. Political statement. Oh, my God. Imagine if you started making the rhymes really deep. Yeah. 91. Help find William Tyrrell. 91.
Starting point is 00:01:16 What numbers rhyme with Cleo? Oh, no. She's been found. She's all good. What numbers rhyme with Free Brittany? Oh, that's sorted. What else is there in the world? Nothing.
Starting point is 00:01:22 She's been MH370. We need to solve it. How can we find Cleo in about two months but not find an aeroplane in 10 years? It baffles me. I feel like, you know, the ocean is a bit more vast than Perth, so they've got more space to cover. True, true. Could be wrong, though.
Starting point is 00:01:37 I've never been to Perth. No, nor have I. Not that I'm allowed in there at the moment. Or the ocean. No, no, you're not. Hey, welcome to the show, episode 91, guys. We're here for all those who thought we'd be cancelled after 90. You're wrong. And Prizekeeper Jenna's back, of course.
Starting point is 00:01:48 Hello, Jenna. Hello, hello. Jenna has been working harder than ever. Oh, my God. Or so I've heard. Yeah, after we announced her fill-in show that's happening in the Christmas break, she has jumped into full gear. Yep.
Starting point is 00:02:00 Mitch, Jenna and I did something without you. No, I'm aware because I asked her to fill in for me. So I'm hoping people can't tell. I'm a bit stuffy. I was sick earlier in the week. And we had a Jess Malboy interview scheduled. And I said, Jenna, you're going to have to step up and fill in for me. So you two did the interview with Jess Malboy, which I'm yet to hear.
Starting point is 00:02:17 Now, yeah, Mitch hasn't heard it. Jenna and I did it yesterday. Thank you. Because Jess's new single, Glow, is out now. Here's a little bit. It's so good. And it's very new for Jess. It's actually such a vibe. I was quite excited to
Starting point is 00:02:34 tell her how much I adore the song but ah well. I hope you showered her with praise Jenna. Oh I don't. I wouldn't say shower. Well you know. You know I would. Jenna how would you rate yourself? This is a self-reflective performance review. How would you say you went in your interview with Jess?
Starting point is 00:02:49 Pretty good. We could talk for hours. I do this all the time and I was easy breezy, palmed it over to Jenna and even I was cringing. Well, we'll hear how that went later on, won't we? But today we're also doing our brand new segment, all thanks to Tinder. It's called Tinder Fairy Tales and Fizzers. Because I myself am a Tinder fairy tale.
Starting point is 00:03:13 Yeah, you are a fairy tale. We're going to hear, you know, success stories just to rub it in for people like me who are yet to have luck. But we're also going to hear the fizzers because let's face it, we've all had crappy dates no matter how you meet, no matter what app you use, sometimes you get there and it's not what you expected it to be. So we've got plenty of fizzes and fairy tales on the way. I can't wait for you guys to hear them.
Starting point is 00:03:34 Also, Tinder have thrown us a couple of gold memberships to give away on the show, which is very exciting. So if you want to get loved up, you want to jump on Tinder, later in the show is your chance to win. That's right. You know who actually is also a Tinder Fairytale at the moment? Bloody our tech guy Sam out there. So I messaged him during Sydney lockdown being like,
Starting point is 00:03:50 so what are you up to? How are you keeping busy? And he said, I'm on Tinder. And then a week later, after what I suspect were many illegal gatherings, I've got a girlfriend, he tells me. Sam. Sam. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:04:00 I'm actually quite excited about it. What's her name? Her name's Krishni. Krishni? Like a baptism? No, Krishni. Krishni? Like a baptism? No, Krishni. Krishni. My apologies.
Starting point is 00:04:09 As in the Indian god, yeah. Wow. I've actually seen a photo of this fairytale match and she is gorgeous. And in case you didn't know, I am gay. I can identify it. How long have you been together now? It must be a couple of months now. And I've got to tell you because so many people were saying to me, oh, you've got to get on the dating apps. You've got to go identify it. How long have you been together now? Oh, it must be a couple of months now. And I've got to tell you, because so many people were saying to me,
Starting point is 00:04:28 oh, you've got to get on the dating apps, you've got to go on it. And the last time I was on Tinder, I ended up scoring a girlfriend for five years. And so I put all this pressure on myself. I'm like, oh, I don't know whether it's going to happen. I'm going to, you know, be going back and forth for ages. But no, one weekend on Tinder. Well, this is bullshit. What am I doing wrong?
Starting point is 00:04:48 Like, you managed to get a girlfriend on Tinder in a lockdown. Okay, well, maybe I'll learn a thing or two from the fairy tales later on. You will, you will. That's coming up later in the show. And if it is your first time listening, welcome to Is It Just Me? Every week we start the show the same way with two Is It Just Me's. We call them Ijem. Something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate.
Starting point is 00:05:06 Mitch doesn't know mine. I don't know Mitch's. They're the crux of the show. God, that was really aggressive. You've got a spit on my face. Sorry. I know we're out of lockdown, but no need to spit on me. Crux.
Starting point is 00:05:14 I'm impassioned. Well, you better go first because mine's a bit filthy. I'm going to tell you that. Oh, is it? I've got a medical question for Dr Gay, our medical correspondent. Oh, is Dr Gay coming on the show? Yeah. Oh! is it? I've got a medical question for Dr. Gay, our medical correspondent. Oh, is Dr. Gay coming on the show? Yeah. It's a bit personal, but I'm ready to tell you all about it. It's changed my life. Brilliant. We haven't had Dr. Gay on in a long time. I know. We've all just been such in good health. He might be Professor Gay by now. Scientist
Starting point is 00:05:38 Gay. All right. Well, you kick things off. Okay. Let's start with the first issue of episode 91. Is it just me or? Am I the only one obsessed with stalking famous people's houses? Oh, I love it. I don't think I've ever actually done that. Oh, you've got to do it. It's a hoot and a holler. Architectural Digest.
Starting point is 00:06:01 You're across Architectural Digest, big magazine in the US. No, I'm not. Really? Oh, it's very famous. Oh, my God. No, I'm not. Really? No. It's very famous. Oh, my God. Well, the fans refer to it as AD. It could be the most famous whatever you said magazine in that genre, but I'm not in that area.
Starting point is 00:06:13 Well, see, neither was I. Then Hayden and I moved in. We have a house now, so I'm really into that at the moment. We're redecorating. We sold everything in our last house, and we're now buying brand new furniture. We don't have a couch. We're buying it all from scratch.
Starting point is 00:06:23 So I'm looking around for inspo for people that I love. Architectural Digest do this thing and it's a home tour and celebrities, full of money, beautiful houses. They do AD at home with XYZ. Who have they done? Lady Gaga has done it, ladies and gentlemen. Brie Larson has done it. Is that the one?
Starting point is 00:06:39 And Troye Sivan did one? You name a celeb, we have a tour online of their house. I am addicted. I sit there and then I Google the products and Troy will be like, this is my couch from Jacque Lemieux. I'll Google that, Hayden, I could get it. $40,000 for the couch. I know.
Starting point is 00:06:55 Sometimes I just don't want to know. I'm like, there's no way I could afford that. Same. So what I've done is, ladies and gentlemen, it intrigues me. I see a house. What I've done is I've collated six of my favourite celeb kitchens. There's a pile in front of you, Mitchell. This is great audio content for people who can't see what we're looking at.
Starting point is 00:07:12 We'll put it up on socials. Now, have a look at the first kitchen, Mitchell and Jenna. Is that the green? Yes, the green kitchen. I'd like you to have a look. Jenna, this is going to sound so bogan, but it's very McLeod's daughter, isn't it? I was just thinking that. It's very country. Des but it's very McLeod's Daughters, isn't it? I was just thinking that. It's very country.
Starting point is 00:07:25 Describe it, yeah. So it's like the sort of gender neutral, faint green that you would buy for someone who hasn't revealed the gender of their baby yet. Like it's very pale green. Yep. A lot of wood. A lot of wood, wood floorboards, white marble benchtop. Whose celebrity kitchen is this? Jenna, can you Google who plays Susan on Neighbours?
Starting point is 00:07:48 Looks like her kitchen. No, it's not. International. It's supposed to be impressive. Sorry, I'm not being rude, but that's like a very modest kitchen. Yeah, it is modest. Yeah, yeah. So, you know, take that into consideration when you're answering.
Starting point is 00:07:59 Who's a poffo star? Mitchell, whose house do you think? I genuinely have no idea. All right. It is Vanessa Hudgens from High School Musical. Yep, that's Vanessa's kitchen. Okay, you know I'd believe that. All right, move on to house number two.
Starting point is 00:08:14 I know this one. I remember this from the video, Troye Sivan's Kitchen. This is Troye Sivan's Kitchen? Yep. Yes. Lots of green, open windows. That's Troye Sivan's Kitchen. Very minimalist. Oh, I would have pictured the same sort of arrangement he had for his YouTube videos. Yes. Lots of green open windows. That's Troye Sivan's kitchen.
Starting point is 00:08:25 Very minimalist. I would have pictured the same sort of arrangement he had for his YouTube videos. Remember it was cool to have the bedroom in the background on YouTube with like the fairy lights on the bed and really dark and dim, like some purple lights. But no, none of that. It looks like a fucking neighbour's set again. All right. House number three. Moving on.
Starting point is 00:08:43 Whose home is this? Magnus Zabinski. I like this one. Mitchell, you're a big fan of this person. Oh. And you and I are watching a show that they star in currently. We love to talk about it. Reese Witherspoon? Jennifer Aniston.
Starting point is 00:08:55 It's Jennifer's house. Great. I love it. I love the fireplace. Looks fake to me, that fire. That's not a real fucking fireplace. Jennifer Aniston. No, it's a pizza oven, guys.
Starting point is 00:09:03 Look at the pizza utensils. Oh, my God. Excuse me. And there's like a wine cellar. There's a real fucking fireplace. Jennifer Aniston. No, it's a pizza oven, guys. Look at the pizza utensils. Oh, my God. Excuse me. And there's like a wine cellar. There's a wine cellar. A lot of fruit on the table. It's quite boring for Jen. That fucking plant on her bench looks a bit thirsty, doesn't it?
Starting point is 00:09:15 Yeah, it does. Wouldn't kill it to water the plants. No, it wouldn't. I like it. Wouldn't kill it in a couple of movies. No, I thought that was a spider. Sorry, I've gone ahead to the next one. No, sorry.
Starting point is 00:09:22 He's gone to photograph four. I've had to scribble out the famous person because they wouldn't leave the kitchen in the video. Is that Margot Robbie? Is it Margot Robbie? Jenna, who are you going to look in? I don't know. Kate Hudson? She does a lot of home stuff.
Starting point is 00:09:38 Kate Hudson? No, it's Kendall Jenner's house. Oh, I thought I saw a glimpse of blonde that you didn't scribble out. No. Do you know what? I really want Kendall Jenner's house. Oh, I thought I saw a glimpse of blonde that you didn't scribble out. No. Do you know what? I really want Kendall Jenner's huge chopping board. I end up washing up about four chopping boards a night because one is never enough. But that big fuck off thing would just take care of the lot.
Starting point is 00:09:56 Yeah, look at that. That's like a door. How would you wash that? It actually looks like that bloody piano that Rose from Titanic slept on top of in the freaking Atlantic Ocean. As if Kendall Jenner is worrying about washing a chopping board. I worry about it. There you go, Kendall.
Starting point is 00:10:09 All right, two more. Okay. Have we noticed that this one, the fifth, is more green cabinetry? Yeah, there's a lot of green. Is this a trend or something? Must be a trend alert. Someone tell AD. Yeah, there's a lot of like faint green and teals going on here.
Starting point is 00:10:21 Is that Adele? This is the biggest artist in the world right now, Jenner. Adele. This is Adele's house the world right now, Jenna. Adele. This is Adele's house. This is from her Vogue 70-whatever questions. She did more than the usual amount. She did like 90-something questions. But, yeah, I recognise Adele's house.
Starting point is 00:10:34 I saw that just the other day. I expected more from that kitchen. Yeah, it is kind of UK country, though. Like, it's a bit sort of Barney. Again, the bloody plants need water. Yeah, they do. All these people are neglecting their shrubbery. All right, final house.
Starting point is 00:10:48 Wow. Very modern. A glorious big kitchen, black cabinetry. This is my favourite, I'd say. Oh, really? I like it. Very modern. Because if I'm going to spend a shitload on a house,
Starting point is 00:10:58 I'm not going to try and make it look modest. I'm going to make it look, you know, modern. I will give you a tip. It is one of the Kardashian-Jenners. Now, we've already had Kendall. Too much colour for Kim. Yeah, way too much colour for Kim. She's got that stripped back Kanye rubbish going on. It's a Jenner or it's a Kardashian's home.
Starting point is 00:11:13 Oh, God. It's not Khloe, is it? I can just hear her in that backyard screaming out for her daughter. Trow! Who calls their child true? Where's your brother false? Jenna, who are you looking at? I think it's either the brother or...
Starting point is 00:11:29 Rob? Rob makes no money. He lives in a tent. He does. Courtney. Courtney. No, it's Kris Jenner, the mother. You've got to run.
Starting point is 00:11:35 Really? I thought hers was way nicer. No, she just moved out of her famous house that they filmed Keeping Up With The Kardashians in. Now she lives in this shithole. Oh. Anyway, all the photos up on the Instagram. Watch Architechtural Digest.
Starting point is 00:11:49 Fuck. Yeah, do that. Architectural Digest. There we go. Think of me, ladies and gentlemen. I didn't even know that thing existed, Architectural Digest. That's hard, guys. All right.
Starting point is 00:12:00 Moving on? Sure, I'm ready. But before we get into my is it just me, Sam's got a little PSA for us. Warning. This contains explicit content and is recommended for mature audiences only. And, yes, we're aware of the irony of us saying that, but we kind of legit mean it this time. This one's a little bit more graphic than usual,
Starting point is 00:12:18 so if you've got, like, kids in the car or something, maybe put some headphones in or don't. Anyway. Is it just me or? Have you ever had a wet dream and not actually made any jizz? No. Yeah. A dry dream, if you will.
Starting point is 00:12:37 Just a dream? No. You still have the climax experience. Yeah. Which, Jenna, I know you're not familiar with this. No, I'm not. But wet dreams are very inconvenient. You can't control it.
Starting point is 00:12:48 You have an orgasm in your sleep and then it's like, oh, I'm going to have to wake up and clean this up. This is annoying. Well, I have to be honest. I have never had one. What? Wait, I thought it was only like a teenager thing. Yeah, I don't think wet dreams happen. No, no, no.
Starting point is 00:13:00 It happens. Oh, I think it happens more often when you're going through puberty because, you know, your hormones are running wild. But it still happens? Oh, like not very often. And this morning, same thing, mid-dream. And then I went to deal with it and I was like, oh, my God, nothing. Wow. It was literally nothing.
Starting point is 00:13:18 And I was like, did I dream that I had a wet dream? Did it actually happen? But no, I fucking felt it. It happened. You were in a great mood this morning. I called him. He was laughing his head off. Oh, my God. That checks out.
Starting point is 00:13:28 Only because there was no cleanup. I've gone on record on this podcast talking about how much I despise semen. You know, I can't stand that crap. And I've said, oh, God, I wish we lived in a world where people could climax without ejaculating. Well, I'm living in that world, baby. Wow. Here we are. And it was amazing. I, I'm living in that world, baby. Wow. Here we are. And it was amazing. I got all the fun, none of the clean up.
Starting point is 00:13:48 But, yeah, there might be something wrong. Were you hydrated last night? Did you do it before you slept? Plenty, because I've been sick recently, so I'm, you know, keeping plenty hydrated. But I thought, whilst I enjoyed the experience, maybe there is something wrong with me, hence why I thought we should get Dr Gay on.
Starting point is 00:14:01 Oh, genius. Yeah, of course. We love Dr Gay. He's a resident in-house doctor. He's also gay. We've had him on for many questions in the past. He is brilliant. It seems to be only me going to him with these fucked questions.
Starting point is 00:14:12 Last time we had Dr. Gay on, I'm just going to pass you his number. Last time we had Dr. Gay on, it was me asking why they shaved my pubes when I was unconscious in surgery. Oh, yeah, I remember that. I remember that. Maybe he's just too polite to say, fuck off, Mitchell, stop asking me these questions about your nether regions. I can't believe you've never had a wet dream.
Starting point is 00:14:32 That's weird. I'm going to ask Dr Gay about that. Dr Gay is being dialed. Let's dial him up. Hello. Hello, Dr Gay. Hi, Dr Gay. Here he is.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Hello, Dr Gay. Long time between visits. Yes, how you been? Hi, Dr. Gay. Here he is. Hello, Dr. Gay. Long time between visits. Yes. How you been? Well, we've been very well. I'm in a great mood today. We've got a couple of things to run past you. Yes.
Starting point is 00:14:53 My issue is that, oh God, I'm not going to beat around the bush. I've already told everyone, but in a nutshell, had a wet dream this morning and I woke up and there was no spoof. There was no clean up required and I was like, is there something wrong with me? Yeah. Because when you have an orgasmm you're meant to deposit yourself. Well you'd think so. Well that's issue number one. Jot that down, Doc.
Starting point is 00:15:10 Issue number two is that when I just brought this up, Mitchell Turi told me that he's never had a wet dream in his life and so I'm just wondering if there's some sort of drought happening. You haven't either? What? I told you it's normal! Sam? Back me up. Shut up Dr Gay. Sam, I need you to back me up's normal. Sam. Yes. Back me up. Shut up, Dr. Gay.
Starting point is 00:15:27 Sam, I need you to back me up right now. Yeah. I'm sorry. This is so personal. But have you ever had a wet dream? I have, but very, very few far in between. Yes. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:15:38 But anyway, Dr. Gay, I need to get your medical insight here. Is it normal to have an orgasm without actually, you know, spoofing, for want of a better phrase. It's certainly not normal, but it's not necessarily bad. I think it's more common. I want that on my tombstone. Not normal, but not necessarily bad. That's a good podcast. So sometimes people can ejaculate without, I'm sorry. You'll have to edit this.
Starting point is 00:16:03 My dog just attacked me. Oh, you're fine. No, no, I don't do any editing here, darling. Well, keep that in. Your doctor approves your manly. You're being mauled while on air. That's fine. He just ran at me.
Starting point is 00:16:11 I thought, oh, fuck. Holy shit. Yeah, look, it's perfectly normal to not ejaculate sometimes, but it's what we call retrograde ejaculation. Oh. Oh, it's got a name? Oh, the word retrograde is triggering for me. Yeah, it's what we call retrograde ejaculation. Oh, it's got a name? Oh, the word retrograde is triggering for me. It's friends with Mercury.
Starting point is 00:16:28 But anyway, is that some sort of skill I can master? Because I would love to just never deal with sperm in my life, but I don't want to go orgasm-less. It's essentially the same mechanism that stops us from pissing ourselves while we're asleep, that kind of mechanism. Right, right. The little sphincter in your bladder that as soon as you come, it closes off and stops anything from going in or out of your bladder.
Starting point is 00:16:49 So you don't piss at the same, you know, you don't want to piss inside your partner, I'm sure. Well, unless they ask. Eventually that sphincter can fail, and at the time you ejaculate, it can just straight inside your bladder instead of out through the penis. Bladder. So Mitch's sphincter has failed and his piss sack is full of cum. Okay, I don't like that version.
Starting point is 00:17:12 The next time you pee, I don't know if you looked at your pee this morning. Was it chunky? It would have been a little bit cloudy. No, I did not pay that close attention. It's in my teacup now. Sam, get the camera. No, we did not pay that close attention. It's in my teacup now. Sam, get the camera. No, we're not filming that. It's that cloudy piss.
Starting point is 00:17:31 It sounds like that's something people do on purpose, but I was dreaming. So, why did that not happen? I didn't do that on purpose. It's just one of those things. No, it just happens sometimes. It's happened to me as well. It has happened to you. I've had sex and i've gone oh where the fuck is it oh my god i wish that happened to everyone i hate semen
Starting point is 00:17:53 but yeah i thought oh it's something wrong with me and that's why i i think i i'm no more than the average person because i panicked and researched. Oh, fabulous. So it's not your medical training. It's your own experience. Oh, well. My own goddamn experience, which is mostly medical training anyway. Well, I don't know why I bothered asking you about wet drains because you've never had one either, you dry-ass fuck. Well, you get less as you get older.
Starting point is 00:18:18 Yeah. But it depends how often you're clearing the pipes, so to speak. Right, so maybe I'm just very sexually active. Cheery's coming all over the place. Yeah, I'd say that's true. Mitchell, I've already told you that I'm still not 100%. I'm feeling ill. Yeah, sorry, Mitch, my gag.
Starting point is 00:18:37 I know. So, now, what Dr Gay's saying that I cum in leaders? Oh. That's what he's saying. Buckets. Buckets, Mitchell. Mitchell, picture a kid's swimming pool filled with my cum. It's what Dr Gay is saying.
Starting point is 00:18:51 Take a dip. Oh, I'm going to vomit. That flash dance scene where she pulls the chain and water falls on her. That, but my cum. What a feeling. Yeah. We're not going to keep our PG rating. You're not going to keep your medical licence, bitch.
Starting point is 00:19:10 I'm going to copy and paste this off to the fucking medical board. This behaviour is disgusting. Is it just me? And he's gone. I've just hung up on Dr. Garland. He's out. We lost him. That was my hitchum.
Starting point is 00:19:26 And you tried to make me feel ill. I know. I've said so many times I can't stand semen as a concept. Look at you. As a concept. Or a reality. All right. Now, guys, this is very exciting.
Starting point is 00:19:36 It's time to get into our brand new segment. Let's do it. Is It Just Me presents Tinder Fairy Tales and Fizzles. I'm very excited for this. It's all thanks to Tinder. If you've got a fairy tale or a fizzer you want to share, hit us up on Instagram at couple of Mitch's. We mentioned it last week, Mitch.
Starting point is 00:19:56 But I myself am a Tinder fairy tale. Yes, which is why I feel that I could learn a thing or two from, well, not you specifically, but all the fairy tales we're going to hear from in this segment. We're doing it for a few weeks, so make sure you slide into our DMs, that couple of minutes if you want to come on. But I also just kind of want to, you know, feel the fizzes pain because I've been there.
Starting point is 00:20:16 I've had a few shit dates, whether it be through Tinder or not, you know. Sometimes they just don't go according to plan, do they? We all go through them. We've all been there. Jenny, you've been on a couple of fizzes yourself. Oh, multiple. Actually, I will say, two we're after are fairy tales. To differentiate the two, you know I love a sound effect.
Starting point is 00:20:29 Oh, God. I thought we need to paint it out for people. We need to spell out what these mean. So if you come on and you've got a fairy tale. Oh, we celebrate. You've found your one. How wonderful. Waiting till marriage, of course.
Starting point is 00:20:43 Trip to Disney. Getting down on one knee. Or if you like Mitch and you have a fizzer. After fizzer. After fizzer. After fizzer. That's what you get. You get all fizzed out, guys.
Starting point is 00:20:56 I'm going to buy a can of Coke now. That tastes lovely. Coke no sugar. Thank you very much. Okay, should we jump in to our first? Why don't we start with a fizzer? Yeah, let's do it. All right, Kayleigh, you're up first.
Starting point is 00:21:07 Hello, darling. Hi, Kayleigh. Thank you for coming on the show. Hello. Thanks for having me. Anytime, darling. I believe you've had a fizzer of a date. Yeah, it wasn't the best, that's for sure.
Starting point is 00:21:17 What went wrong? What happened on the date? Tell us. So we matched all well and good. We spoke for, I think, maybe two weeks. And then he was like, let's go get some ice cream. I was like, cool. Picks me up.
Starting point is 00:21:27 We go for a drive. We get the ice cream. Sit there and he's like, you really don't need that. Do you really? Are you really sure you need that? Like, you know, it might gain some weight to your hips. Like, you know, you're already a bit big. Was he saying this in like a cute joking way that you might find funny?
Starting point is 00:21:42 Or was he being serious? I thought he was being serious like the first time when he was like, oh, you know, you don't really need that. I was kind of like, oh, yeah, you know, you might be joking. The first time where he did this again and again and again? Oh, my God. Yeah. So I was like, you know, it's fine.
Starting point is 00:21:55 And then he continued and was like, you really don't need it. So then he took my ice cream after he finished his and was like, I'll have that. You really don't need it. So not only did he stuff his own fat face with an ice cream, but then he ate yours too. Yeah, ate mine. And then we get in the car, and he's like, I had such a good time.
Starting point is 00:22:12 And I was like, not me. Oh, the audacity. That's a misser. You know. He's like, you know, whatever. Never saw him again. And then, like, since then. And then I run into him about three months ago after I had my baby
Starting point is 00:22:25 and he said that looked me up and down and was like, you can tell you had a baby. Oh, no. You dodged a bullet, Kayleigh. A big bullet. What was your ice cream choice, Kayleigh? Was it a sorbet? For Christ's sake, that's basically water.
Starting point is 00:22:39 No, we went and got, I think it was like Malteser and Ferrero Rocher ice cream. It was really nice. I didn't even get to have it. How much of it did he let you finish before he devoured it himself, the fat pig? I had like half a scoop. It was like in a Star Trek container. No, that's unacceptable. Half a Malteser.
Starting point is 00:22:55 Now I'm mad. Yeah, I'm furious for you, Kayleigh. Send us his details off the air. We will sort him out. Jenna will hunt him down. I'm already. All right, thank you, Kayleigh. See you, darling. Better luck on the next date. All right, thank you, Kayleigh. See you, darling.
Starting point is 00:23:05 Better luck on the next date. All right, Dean, you're up next. Welcome to the show. Let's hear about your fizzer. G'day, guys. Hi, mate. Hi. I had been with my partner, sort of split up with her.
Starting point is 00:23:17 Some friends about 18 months later were like, oh, you know, you need to start settling down. Set us up on this blind date. I wouldn't trust my friends with a blind date. No offence, Mitch and Jenna. You'd end up being a pigeon. We'd set you up with a bear or something ridiculous. That would be so funny.
Starting point is 00:23:30 Or me. So I sort of resisted for a while and then was like, oh, yeah, okay, just to get them off my back. Yeah, you wanted to get yourself out there again. Yeah, so it's all set up, you know, going to meet at this bar. So get there on the Friday night, walk into the bar. And my ex was sitting at the bar. I'm thinking, oh, man, this is going to be so awkward, you know, I'm about to meet
Starting point is 00:23:48 this new girl I've never met, so get a text message from my mate's wife, Lyndall, and goes, oh mate, you're not there, and I'm like, no, I'm here, like, she's not here, but we don't know what she looks like, like, what does she look like, so I'll send you a picture, looked like? Like, what does she look like? Yeah, it's a blind date. So I'll send you a picture. Open up the text message and here's a picture of my ex. Oh, God.
Starting point is 00:24:08 I'm like, oh, no. They set you up with your ex. Had this friend of your ex never hung out with you two when you were a couple? Did you know they were friends? No. We didn't know them as a couple. Well, how did the date go, more importantly? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:22 The reconciliation. Yeah, it was like, the photo came up and I was like, oh, do I just skulk out of here and not say anything and let the poor girl feel like she's been stood up or do I go and say something? Well, it depends. Were you feeling shitty at her? Did she dump you?
Starting point is 00:24:36 Like, you could have done a bit of revenge there, leave her on her own. Oh, no, no. It was pretty amicable. So I just walked up to her and said, hi, how are you going? She's like, oh, you're really good. And I said, you waiting for someone? And she sort of looked at me a bit awkwardly and she went, no. It was pretty amicable. So I just walked up to her and said, hi, how are you going? She's like, oh, you're really good. And I said, are you waiting for someone? And she sort of looked at me a bit awkwardly and she went, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:49 And I went, yeah, I am too. This is the girl and showed her the photo and it was her. And she sort of looked at me and we both just looked at each other and laughed. Yeah. Oh, no. Dean, that's a fizzer. If ever I've heard one. Well, I was kind of waiting for the end of the story.
Starting point is 00:25:03 I'm like, maybe it's a fairy tale. Maybe they got back together. I'm assuming that's not the case, one. Well, I was kind of waiting for the end of the story. I'm like, maybe it's a fairy tale. Maybe they got back together. I'm assuming that's not the case, Dean. No, no. We did have a drink together. What did the friends say when you eventually broke it to her? Sorry, been there, done that. Yeah, she was devastated.
Starting point is 00:25:19 She was like, oh, I'm sorry. She just couldn't apologise enough. We dined out on that story for months. I can imagine. I doubt that has happened many times in the world. So are you single now, Dean? Yes. Great news.
Starting point is 00:25:30 Perfect. You've won a Tinder Gold membership, mate. We'll send you out. Get yourself a fairy tale on us. Awesome. Thanks, guys. Now, I'll tell you what the Tinder Gold membership is. It lets you see who has already liked you before you decide to match.
Starting point is 00:25:43 So you can also rewind if you say no to anyone and change your mind later. And you'll get all the member-only stuff on Tinder, Passport, unlimited likes. It's great. I've got it. I'm in a happy relationship and I think I want it. Awesome. All right, Dean. Hopefully I'll match with somebody who's not my ex, eh?
Starting point is 00:25:59 Yeah, 100%. Make sure Pricekeeper Jenna sends you out that membership, won't you? She'll chat you off there. We'll look after you. Awesome. Thanks, guys. Thanks, Dino. Bye.
Starting point is 00:26:08 God, the poor bloke. That is a piece of cake. I know. Let's do a fairy tale. I want a good news story. Yeah, we've got to have a happy ending here, don't we? Yeah, let's do one. We've got Steph is on, ready for a fairy tale.
Starting point is 00:26:18 Steph, come on. You've got a good news story for us, don't you? I do. It's a fairy tale. Yay! My kind of person. Okay, so I already know that the person you ended up with has a beautiful name, Mitchell. Oh, that's a fairy tale ending in itself, ending up with someone named Mitch.
Starting point is 00:26:37 Well, I would have thought so too, but apparently not. But let's go back to the beginning, right? What first caught your eye when you saw Mitch on Tinder? back to the beginning, right? What first caught your eye when you saw Mitch on Tinder? Well, when I saw his profile, his photo was like a professional work kind of portfolio one. Like a LinkedIn sort of thing.
Starting point is 00:26:51 Like a headshot. Yeah, yeah. And then his second one, he was, oh, I think he was very drunk at a music festival with like a rainbow bucket hat. Oh, that's cool. Accepting though of all people, rainbow, that's a good sign. Do you know what? I do that too. I like to do juxtaposing photos on Tinder. I've got me looking real cute and then me looking disgusting.
Starting point is 00:27:11 I just want to be transparent, you know? It shows diversity. And then his third one is he has a beautiful mustache, and he used to twirl it like an old-fashioned man in, like, the 20s. Oh, my God. That was really funny, and that made me smile. That is so true, gentlemen. I'm falling in love with him.
Starting point is 00:27:29 Yeah. And we matched. Fabulous. Okay. So what was the chat like once you got talking? You know, you matched and then you would have been chatting. How did it go? He sent me a GIF of this random nerdy guy going, hello.
Starting point is 00:27:44 Oh, that was his opening line. He just sent a GIF. Yeah. Okay, I'm writing this down. Yeah a GIF of this random nerdy guy going, hello. Oh, that was his opening line. He just sent a GIF. Yeah. Okay, hang on. I'm writing this down. Yeah, GIF. That's G-I-F. Right, taking notes so I can have my own fairy tale.
Starting point is 00:27:54 Okay, then what? How long did you chat for before meeting up? A day. Oh, 24 hours. That's very good. Right, then what did you do on your first date, Steph, after the day? Well, we went to Nando's and had a chicken wrap, and I was so sick of dating, and so I told him straight up,
Starting point is 00:28:13 I'm going to be completely me. I'm not going to sugarcoat anything. I'm just completely me. And he's like, that's all I want. And we were there for like three hours until they were like, you need to leave. I love that you just said, I'm going to be myself, because that's where I go wrong. I say, I'm going to be myself.
Starting point is 00:28:30 And they said, no, thanks. God, is Mitchell bisexual by any chance? So, Steph, how long after meeting up did you think, oh, yeah, there actually could be a future between us here? Well, after the date, he messaged me saying, I had a really great time. I hope you did too. And then we met up the day after, again. Wow. Two days in a row. Oh my God. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:28:53 And I took him to this beautiful lookout in an area near me. And he was shaking a lot. And I was like, are you okay? He was like, I just want to do something. And he kissed me. Oh! That's a fair something. And he kissed me. Oh, now that is a fairy tale. And we're only two days
Starting point is 00:29:10 into the relationship and it's already a fairy tale. How long have you been together now? It's three years this Saturday. Oh my God, you're getting another one. Happy anniversary. That was really quick. You still had Nando's chicken sauce on your cheek. Well, yeah, and then we went on a little trip to Brisbane
Starting point is 00:29:29 and we had like a three-day weekend and then after four months of dating, I moved in with him. Wow. Oh, my God. He was meant to be. Is that like, because I've never been in a relationship quite famously, is that normal or is that like quite soon to move in after four months? That is very, very soon.
Starting point is 00:29:45 Very soon, yeah. Okay, okay. But it went well? Yeah. I mean, we're engaged now. Oh, my God! Yeah. That's going to be sick.
Starting point is 00:29:56 Me too. I'm happy for you, but I'm seethingly jealous. And we've never had a fight, so he's the one. Now you're rubbing it in. Get her off. Oh, well, that sounds no fun to me, actually. I take it back. Congrats, Steph.
Starting point is 00:30:07 We're really happy for you. I'm glad Tinder worked out. Oh, thank you so much. I'm glad it helped us too because I found my man. Oh, with the best name in the world. And a cute moustache. He can pull off a hat. He loves chicken.
Starting point is 00:30:20 There we get it. When's the wedding? It's a year from this weekend. Oh, okay. So next November. Yeah. Okay, well, I'll have the chicken. Is there any diet requirements here?
Starting point is 00:30:33 Because we're all coming, obviously. I'll get the chicken and the beef, so two plates for me. Oh, yeah. And you can fight, too. You can be MC. Jenna, can we be bar? No, you can't. Mitch and I are kicking back at the bar.
Starting point is 00:30:43 Oh, thanks, Steph. That's okay. See you, superstar. Bye. If you have a Tinder fairy tale or fizzer, hit us up. And you want to share it, a couple of Mitch's on Instagram. We will get you on the air. And we will get you a Tinder Gold membership, too.
Starting point is 00:30:57 Yeah, God. I'm going to fucking write some more notes. I really need some people to come through with advice on this segment. We're doing it for a couple of weeks. So, yeah. Help a bitch out. Yeah, we want all different kinds and the gushy ones are good. I love it. Steph was really rubbing it in. If you can top Steph, hit
Starting point is 00:31:14 us up because we'd love to have you on the show. Is it just me? The rude shocks of young adulthood. Okay, so every week we like to hear an is it just me from a listener. We call them is It Just You? It's your time to get something off your chest. Who have we got today?
Starting point is 00:31:29 Today we have Melania who has sent this idjim in. Is it just me or do young people put too much pressure on themselves and feel they need to accomplish everything by 25? Oh, wow. Loaded question. Oh, that's heavy. Yes, long answer short, actually, I would say so. Yeah, I agree.
Starting point is 00:31:49 And you know what? It's weird. As I've recently turned 26, Mitch, you're at 25 now. Jenna's 3,000 and eternal and perpetually alive. But I had the 25 dread, which is nothing. I'm sure when I'm 50, I will look back at 25 and think, grow the fuck up. Oh, you will. Literally. I'm sure when I'm 50 I will look back at 25 and think, grow the fuck up. Oh, you will, literally.
Starting point is 00:32:06 Yeah, I'm sure I will. But I turned 26 and I thought, shit, I'm technically old in the scheme of things. Yeah, I didn't have the 25-year itch or whatever you called it because I realised quite early on that I was rushing to grow up. Yeah. Like I was trying to do it like when I was 18 or 19. I was like, I'm such an adult.
Starting point is 00:32:25 But as Miley Cyrus once said in a song, I feel so much younger now. And I've had so many people come in this very studio when we ask them to give advice to their younger selves, say, don't do a five-year plan. Don't, you know, stick to this one road that you set for yourself. Just like go with the flow, which is where I'm at because I think I've said before, my goal was to work for Kyle and Jackie O by the time I was 25. And then I got the job at 21 and I was like, oh shit. So like Milani said, I was in a rush.
Starting point is 00:32:51 I literally got there earlier than I was meant to. And now I'm at 25 just doing nothing. I completely agree. As much nothing as I can. Yeah. And you know what? When you set yourself goals like that and you hit them, trust me, it isn't as amazing as you think it's going to be. Oh, so you have the pinch yourself but then obviously the reality
Starting point is 00:33:09 dawns on you that every job has its shit elements yeah but it's not even that like i remember my goal before i was 25 was to be on tv and then you get there and you do it and you're like now what's the next goal and i haven't even celebrated the first exactly and it's like what's next yeah exactly and that's maybe that's just me. Funny that. But I'm always looking on the horizon. I think that's a really bad trait to have. And I think a really great way to ground yourself is just live in the moment and live day to day.
Starting point is 00:33:35 I think the best thing I ever did was move into an apartment with a view of Sydney because it's a perfect spot to go to and be like, oh, this is all I wanted when I lived in Vogengate. Yeah. And here I am. Yeah. So, yes, I'm less in a rush, as Melania said, as I used to be. And it's good.
Starting point is 00:33:50 It's good. I think I was manic for many years, actually. You think? Yeah. Even when I had that, what did I call it? The psychiatric recess. Yes. Haven't actually been the same since.
Starting point is 00:34:00 You've been better. I guess. It's changed you. Yeah. Like, I think I've, at first I was like, why am I in slow motion all the time? But then I realised, oh no, that's what I was meant to be before. That's normal. Up until that anxious snap.
Starting point is 00:34:13 Break. Yep. I was just, I think I was literally manic for years because I was just like, work, work, work, work, work. Yeah. Got as many things done in a day. Now I'm like, Jenna, pass me that tissue, would you, Dan? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:34:22 I'm not fucking getting up. Yeah. You've definitely mellowed out, especially on this show. And this show's a perfect example of it. We are looser than your bladder full of cum. I think you'll find it's bursting at the seams. It's not loose at all. It's fucking chockers.
Starting point is 00:34:37 If you have an issue and you want to get it on the show, hit us up a couple of inches, slide into our DMs. That is also where you can contact us. Oh, sorry, I missed the cough mute button there. Yeah, in the middle of doing a sell. Yeah, a couple of Mitch's. There you go. All right, thank you, Melania.
Starting point is 00:34:53 This is very exciting, Mitch, because it's now time to hear how our very own Pricekeeper Jenna went interviewing Jessica Mowboy. Mitchell, this will come as a surprise to you. You haven't heard any of this audio. Yeah, no, I'm very keen to hear how this Jessica Malboy interview went because I was sick the other day. Jenna had to step up and interview Jessica Malboy alongside you. Yeah. So did she fill my shoes well?
Starting point is 00:35:21 Well, she didn't really step up. She sort of slid in. We were in another studio and it was a simple webcam and I was front and centre and Jenna just like sat awkwardly next to me the whole time. You told me to sit there. Well, were you going to sit on my shoulders? Well, if you asked.
Starting point is 00:35:36 Yeah, true. Jenna's very obedient. It felt different without having you there. But Jenna didn't do badly, you know. Well, I think you'll be impressed. We have the audio. It definitely gets worse. Don't tell me that. I've spoken to
Starting point is 00:35:48 Jess hundreds of times, so we have a relationship. But then, throwing Jenna in the mix, definitely through her. Yeah, right. Okay, maybe we should have given Jenna the interview solo. Two powerful women come together, a one-on-one interview, Jenna and Jess Mowboy. Next time, write that down. It's like morning wars.
Starting point is 00:36:03 I think for you, this is great practice for your fill-in show, Jenna, that you're doing in December. Because, you know, we interview guests all the time. You'll have to do it on your own in December. Yeah, that's right. When we're having a little podcast Christmas break, Jenna's going to soldier on by herself. I will be. She's doing the Jenna Fling.
Starting point is 00:36:17 All right, so it started off pretty stock standard. I was doing my thing. I was talking to Jess about her new single, Glow, off her upcoming album. She's touring in the new year. There's a lot happening for Jess Malboy. So it was very stock standard to begin. Hello. Hello.
Starting point is 00:36:30 How are you guys? Because baby just let me glow. And da-da-da-doo-doo-doo. And da-da-da-doo-doo-doo. Let me be the one that I need to be to grow. Oh, my God. Let me glow. Can you hear Jenna?
Starting point is 00:36:44 Hi. Hey, Sue. you hear Jenna? Hi. Hey, sis. Hello, Jenna. Hi. Jenna, are you a fan of Jess's music? Yeah, I'm a big fan. Oh, I love you. There you go.
Starting point is 00:36:56 You are glowing. It's almost like there's an energy about you in a radiance, and I'm looking at a computer screen, so that's hard to get across with the pixels. But you are gorgeous, and I can hear it in glow jess it's almost like we've seen you grow from the start of your career we've heard every song in the library that is just malboy but it's funny when you hear glow it's like oh my this is a jess malboy song even though it's so different to what you've put out in the past you must be happy that that's the reception
Starting point is 00:37:23 you're getting yeah no i'm literally like i don't know if that's appropriate to say but i'm just like literally giving myself a hug like you can say that yeah yeah hug yourself you know you know like just to say thank you to myself for really trusting those instincts um because i've always just imagined if i did really infused a bit of the genre of disco or really went hard with R&B soul, what would that sound like? But I'm so proud of this song. Oh, isn't it beautiful? Yeah, about glow, yeah. Oh, right, you're just playing me some of the highlights.
Starting point is 00:37:59 I thought that was the whole interview. I was like, Jenna hasn't spoken. Oh, no, no, no. No, no, no, no. So Jenna talks a little bit in this next question. Okay, so you've done all the housekeeping. You've plugged the shit that she's there to plug. Great.
Starting point is 00:38:09 Mitch doing his thing. Now we can move on, and this is where we get our first feature of Jenna. Take a listen. We have a lot, a lot, a lot of young listeners that listen to our podcast and the show, and you are such a success from such a young age. Do you have any advice for young creatives or anyone in the workforce just thinking we've got our years ahead of us, anything that really helped you get through your career
Starting point is 00:38:31 that could help them now? Yeah, totally. I just think for me one of my greatest opportunities was like when I got my first paycheck in music, I started to invest in property. And it was like my first kind of apartment i'd ever bought and that was basically home away from home from darwin because i was community meeting all the time to sydney yeah i was literally about 16 years old so yeah it was definitely a space for me that i had no idea about and I just started to kind of learn and educate myself in it. And, you know, music doesn't make a lot of money. So, you know, you have to kind of look at, you know,
Starting point is 00:39:12 various other different kind of channels. Side projects, yeah. That are going to kind of help you along the way. Yeah, so different projects along the way. But, yeah, I kind of started really young and kind of grew into it and jumped in the deep end and just, yeah, started to make money from it. Yeah. Good advice.
Starting point is 00:39:27 Amazing. Good advice. Is that all Jenna had to say? I was like, when is Jenna going to talk? Jenna, you did well there. That took a lot of guts for you. It did. If I'd been there, I would have pulled her up on that question
Starting point is 00:39:40 because it made no sense. She said, when I got my first paycheck in music, I bought a fucking apartment. Then she goes on to say, music doesn't make you a lot of money. I know. So you've got to do other projects. What fucking projects? Are you making pots and selling them at markets?
Starting point is 00:39:54 Like are you knitting tea cozies? What are you doing? How did you afford a freaking apartment in Sydney, darling? I love that. I'm like, what advice do you have? And she said, I bought a house. That was the advice. At 16.
Starting point is 00:40:04 At 16. Anyway, anyway you know it's different for everyone what you're gonna do Jenna because I'm sensing that it was tricky to get a word in whenever we've got an interview because Mitch is obviously used to interviewing people by himself and so he probably forgets I'm there sometimes when we do stuff for the podcast I just give him this little look he does I do a little raise of the eyebrows which tells him I got something to say shut your mouth for a bit. It works. I like that technique. It does work. So you've just got to do that next time if you want to get a word in. I will.
Starting point is 00:40:29 Or if you want to be really obvious, just wave in his face. Oi! I've got nothing to say. No, no, no. I will say this is where I let Jenna have the floor. Okay. And we ask our guests one very, very famous question every time we talk to them. Yes. Oh, the drugs and dick question that I always ask. Oh, yeah, of course. And I thought, you know what? I will let Jenna handle this one. Jenna asked the drugs and dick question that I always ask. Of course. And I thought, you know what, I will let Jenna handle this one.
Starting point is 00:40:47 Jenna asked the drugs and dick question. I sure did. Good girl. Good girl filling my shoes. Now, boy, here is the audio of Jenna and Jess one-on-one. So what would you consider better than dick? Jenna, you have to say it. Sorry.
Starting point is 00:41:04 What would you consider better than drugs and dick? So, for instance, Angela Bishop said a waterbed. Oh, absolutely. I know what you mean. I mean, like, I love, I absolutely love, like, sitting in a garden, like, with the sun out, the sun shining, I'm getting vitamin D, but I'm also like, you know, being a little bit earthy and I'm sitting like in the garden on the grass.
Starting point is 00:41:34 That is like, that is, and when your feet just sink into the grass and like the grass goes between your toes, it's like, yo, yo, that is is the that's the feeling jenna's jenna's very easily sunburned so she's probably not um she burns she crisps so easily she knows the sunscreen yeah your sunscreen you have to apply your sunscreen yeah you do and i mean even even a rash shirt a rash shirt no maybe not a rash shirt in a park, Jess. That would ruin it. Well, why not one of those, like, sombreros? You know, you can dig that.
Starting point is 00:42:10 Exactly. But how do you feel about rash shirts? A what? A rash shirt. A rash shirt? Do you know, like, what you go swimming with? Do you know, like, what surfers wear is sun protection. No thoughts on from Jess Melboy.
Starting point is 00:42:33 I'm really glad we brought you in, Jenna. No, Jenna, I've never tried one. So, like, I wouldn't. But you know what? You give me a thought, I'm going to go and experience one of those things. There'll be Glow Rush shirts in December. Just you wait. I will be buying one. I will be buying one. I will be buying one.
Starting point is 00:42:45 Right. All right, Jess. We love you. Thank you so much for being here. Glow is out everywhere now, guys. It is such a sensational song. It's a new era for you. We are so excited.
Starting point is 00:42:55 And the tour happening next year, the Boss Lady Tour, which is the best tour name I think I've heard in a long time, is kicking off in March in Canberra next year. It's going all around Australia from March to April. You can get tickets. Is it jessmalboy.com maybe or Jess's Instagram? You'll find the tickets. And we'll talk to you soon, okay?
Starting point is 00:43:13 Hopefully very soon. Yes. Big love to you, Mitch. Big love. And Jenna too. Thank you. Lovely to meet you. Jenna will never forget this.
Starting point is 00:43:21 It was unforgettable. Oh, that's so good. Unforgettable for me too, Jenna. never forget this. It was unforgettable. Oh, that's so good. Unforgettable for me too, Jenna. I did so well. She said that it was unforgettable. Yes. I don't know if that's a compliment. Unforgettable. You know what else is unforgettable?
Starting point is 00:43:36 War. That's true. It's not necessarily a good thing if you can't forget it. Yeah, but my... Pestilence. My experience in history debating. Sometimes war isn't war. Yes, of course. Sometimes war isn't war. Jenna, I've interviewed many people.
Starting point is 00:43:49 That's the longest pause I've ever experienced. Yeah. After you asked Jess Malboy if she liked rash shirts. Well, I bet she'd never been asked that before. Well, you've been banging on about rash shirts, wanting us to do it as merch. We've made it very clear it's not happening. You can't then try and get Jess Malboy on your side.
Starting point is 00:44:07 Nice try. She's never even heard of them. She said she'll have to try one. It's Jess Malboy. She's not going to say no to your face. Yeah, no, she's too nice. She's got a brand to uphold. Me, on the other hand, I've got no niceties to keep up,
Starting point is 00:44:19 so I thought that was shocking, that interview. Oh, it was amazing. I got bored, and I'm the one hosting the show, so our poor listeners, that interview. Oh, it was amazing. I got bored and I'm the one hosting the show, so our poor listeners. That probably caused road accidents. People have been killed listening to that. For your first interview, Jenna, I think you did very well. Thank you very much.
Starting point is 00:44:34 It's fine. I reckon you've got to let her do one by herself next time. You know what? I will use my little black book, my guest booking capabilities, and I will book you a guest for, let's say, your second or third fill-in show. We won't start with a guest. Okay.
Starting point is 00:44:46 But we will get there and we'll see how you go one-on-one without anyone in the room. Okay. Deal. I'm in. Just don't ask about rash shirts. You can't control what I ask. True. All right.
Starting point is 00:44:57 The ratings will dictate how that show goes. The ratings. The ratings. The fill-in ratings. All right. Well, well done, Jenna. Thank you for being a good sport, Jess Malboy. I'm sorry.
Starting point is 00:45:04 We'll meet next time. Thank you for coming on, Jess. Jess Malboy. I'm sorry. We'll meet next time. Thank you for coming on, Jess. We do love her. A single glow is out now and it really is good. You've heard it, Mitch and Jenna. I love it. We love it. No, actually, they sent me an advance copy in preparation for the interview I didn't do.
Starting point is 00:45:16 And, you know, when you, like, listen to these things that people send you and you think, oh, I'm going to have to be nice and, like, pity them, you're probably good at that. I'm not. But when I heard it, I was like, oh, this is actually fantastic. I don't have to feign some sort of enthusiasm. I really like it. Put it on again. Glow.
Starting point is 00:45:30 Yeah. Yeah. And like you said, Mitch, it is different from her usual stuff. Well, she signed to a new music label, which is very interesting. Oh, they told me not to ask about the record label switch. You didn't bring that up, did you? That was my first question. I just said you've had big changes, including the music
Starting point is 00:45:52 label. It's fine. We go way back. I can break the rules. I probably should have forwarded you that email, Jenna. Yeah, maybe. I didn't get any email. Alright, let's go. Well done, Jenna. Very impressed. Did she seem nervous before she spoke to Jess Mailboy? Because I didn't even think about it.
Starting point is 00:46:09 We just kind of threw her in the deep end. I was like, guys, I'm sick. I can't come in. I was literally waiting for a COVID test result. I thought I was infected at Pooftoof. I probably was, but not with COVID. But yeah, I'm all clear, thank God. But yeah, Jenna had to step up.
Starting point is 00:46:20 Was she nervous? Well, there was nothing more than the usual amount of shivering and shaking and whining. Yeah, it was just annoying. And I found the room was very cold. The studio was cold. We were in a second studio. Where the fuck did you record that? It sounded like you were in a fish tank.
Starting point is 00:46:32 We used Kiss Studio 2, the workday studio. It was very cold. We don't have our special, fancy, expensive microphones. Yeah, the audio was no good compared to here. No, it was terrible. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, Jess, thank you for coming on.
Starting point is 00:46:43 If you want to come on our show, you can hit us up at Couple of Mitches. We are doing Tinder, Fairytale and Fizzes again next week. All thanks to Tinder. A big thank you to Tinder as well. Yes, of course. For helping this episode. And also, when is it just you, if you want to get something off your chest. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:46:55 We want to hear from you. At Couple of Mitches, Jen is currently mining the Instagram as her pricekeeper duty. So if you get left on red, that's her fault. Maybe you also don't ejaculate when you get there. We want to hear from you. Wouldn't that be a great is it, Jashu, if someone says it too? I come into my bladder. Oh, if we get flooded with messages saying,
Starting point is 00:47:12 I don't have wet dreams either, I'll be furious because they're extremely normal and you and Dr Gay tried to make me feel like an alien. Well, it's real and it exists and it's in your bladder. I'm just hoping that every time I jizz hereafter, I'm hoping something actually is wrong with me and I just never do it again. That'd be great.
Starting point is 00:47:28 Yeah. And it's just all in your bladder. Yeah, I don't mind it being there. At least I don't have to fucking deal with it. Wait, do girls actually do it? Because they do it all internally, right, Jenna? Yeah, here I am oversharing. Have you ever squirted, Jenna?
Starting point is 00:47:39 Oh, my. No. Oh, that makes you uncomfortable. No, because Jenna's like our sister. No. Does stuff spray like our sister. No. Does stuff spray out? No. Yeah, so you, poor Mitchell, you're meant to be a woman.
Starting point is 00:47:51 I think you'll find women can get very damp down there as well. Sam, you'll back me up. I can confirm. There you go. I've been down there. So what I'm hearing is that Sam and I get a bit soggy in our lovemaking and these two, drier than a nun's puss.
Starting point is 00:48:08 Incorrect. No, that is not right. Oh, Hayden! But you know what's funny? When you said it, I don't think Hayden, I don't think I've ever woken up to Hayden's because we're two men. Like, I don't think there's been a mess in the bed from him. They don't mess in your bed.
Starting point is 00:48:21 Well, he doesn't sleep with any clothes on, so it would. Oh, my apologies. He'd get my bed thread linen. Yeah, so he'd just shoot all in your bed. Well, he doesn't sleep with any clothes on, so it would. Oh, my apologies. He'd get my bed thread linen. Yeah, so he'd just shoot all over the bed. You're a heavy sleeper, no pun intended, so he could easily just get up and go get a chucks cloth and just get rid of the evidence so that you don't worry. Like, you're a paranoid type.
Starting point is 00:48:38 He'd be like, if Mitch sees I've had a wet dream, he'll take it personally. I've got to dispose of this. That could have happened. No, it wouldn't have happened. Although when we moved, I was moving the bedside table and there was a used tissue and I'm like, oh,. He'll take it personally. I've got to dispose of this. That could have happened. No, it wouldn't have happened. Although when we moved, I was moving the bedside table and there was a used tissue and I'm like, oh, there's snot in this. I think he came in it. Well, fair enough.
Starting point is 00:48:51 You leave him at home on his own for hours on end. I'm not mocking it, but I picked it up. This is probably dusty. No, it's full of dry cum. Oh, God. Anyway. Before we get out of here, I just want to mention that don't forget my live shows in Sydney are coming up.
Starting point is 00:49:03 Yes. Yay. Yeah. You're joking. Live. No, it's Can You Stand It? Oh, shit. That's the next one. I'm spoiled.
Starting point is 00:49:11 I had a meeting about it today and I said to them, are you happy with the amount of ticket sales we've made so far? Because I would be thrilled just to get one, but there's still plenty left to be sold. And they were like, oh no, this is normal. What happens with these things, especially after lockdowns, is the week before that's when people will start buying them. There'll be people wanting them, but then they won't, they'll put it off and leave it till right before.
Starting point is 00:49:34 So if you want to come, get in before the rush. Because all the lazy bitches out there are going to get them last minute. Get tickets to Mitch's shows and DM us if you want to get on our show. Lots of shows happening, everyone. Too many. We're going to get out of here. Lots of shows happening, everyone. I love them so much. Too many. We've got to get out of here. We'll see you next week for episode 92.
Starting point is 00:49:49 Thanks for listening. Don't forget, leave us a review. Five stars. Yes, if you run Apple Podcasts. We'll catch you next week. Love you, idiot. Bye. Is it just me?
Starting point is 00:49:57 A podcast by a couple of Mitch's. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Welcome to ADD Brief. This is our secret segment on the end. We call it ADD Brief because this is where we just kind of follow our ADHD train of thought, darling. It goes all sorts of weird fucking places, which is why we keep it a secret. Hopefully most people aren't here for this. You've got cum in your bladder.
Starting point is 00:50:41 I mean, it doesn't matter anyway. God, I really just don't want that to become a thing. That's the next message. It's here. Oh, it's't matter anyway. God, I really just don't want that to become a thing. That's the next one! It's it! Oh! It's Joel Creasy! Oh! What? Can't wait for your live shows, at Mitchell Coombs. Thanks, Joel. From one comedian to another. Then he forgot. Good luck! He chopped it in half. Yeah, gotcha.
Starting point is 00:50:57 Ran out of characters. Character limit on Twitter. Yeah, of course. That's nice from Joel Creasy! That's really nice! Friend of the show! Oh! Kitty Flanagan. Kitty. Oh, stop it. Oh, I love Kitty. Kitty says you're joking because she knows that's your catchphrase.
Starting point is 00:51:12 I loved Kitty Flanagan growing up. She used to do, and this is the most like old school thing ever. Do you remember the concept of like appointment viewing? Like you tune in at a certain time on a certain day to watch a certain thing. I would literally turn on the project every Tuesday night, not from the start. I'd wait until like the last 15 minutes because she always did a little slot. It was the best. Yeah, what did she do?
Starting point is 00:51:35 Basically stand up on camera. And this was back in the days when the project had a live audience and it was so good. Oh, I love Kitty. I loved Kitty's little segments. I was devo when they ended. Finally a comedian with better hair than mine. That's what she said. I'm pretty sure I have a photo with Kitty Flanagan.
Starting point is 00:51:51 As a little kid? Yeah. Oh. Me and a couple of friends went and saw her in orange. Oh. And she was the ambassador for some, the charity was called like Delta. It was something to do with dogs, maybe seeing eye dogs. And to get a selfie with her, you had to pop a coin in for Delta.
Starting point is 00:52:07 Oh, that's so nice. And I was like, fuck me, who's got a coin? I want a photo with Guinea Flanagan. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let me see. Do you have it? I'm looking. I'm looking.
Starting point is 00:52:15 While you look for that, I came across a photo of myself and Koshi and Samantha Doyle. Is that her name, Samantha Doyle? That's a hybrid of his two mistresses. Melissa. It's Samantha Armitage and Melissa Doyle. Sorry. Melissa Doyle. Is that her name, Samantha Doyle? That's a hybrid of his two mistresses. Melissa. It's Samantha Armitage and Melissa Doyle. Sorry, Melissa Doyle. When I went to see Joel, I can't speak, Jesse McCartney at Sunrise. Oh, my God.
Starting point is 00:52:34 Why on earth did you go and see Jesse McCartney from the Sunrise window? Because my mum and my sisters wanted to go. But someone can backdate it because it was the same day the last Lemony Snicket book came out because Koshi gave me one. Oh, yeah, we've heard that story. So you weren't there for that reason because you told us you were there to get the Lemony Snicket book. And I was like, I wouldn't have picked you for the nerdy library type that's going to go get a fucking book.
Starting point is 00:52:57 No, I believe I knew that that was happening, so that's what sort of got me out of bed. But there was a Jesse McCartney hybrid. It was the same day. Beautiful Soul was the hit song. Well, I wouldn't get out of bed for either, but that at least makes sense that you were there to see a live performance. Yes, yes, yes.
Starting point is 00:53:09 I wonder if Sunrise can even do those anymore. You know how they always used to have the plaza performances? Yeah, they did. Yeah. Have you found your kitty photo? Found it. Oh, here we go. So this is Rachel.
Starting point is 00:53:21 If anyone's curious enough, you scroll back on my Instagram to October 2013. It's a collage. Show me. Oh. Shit. Oh my God, you look. Baby Mitchell. Show me closer.
Starting point is 00:53:33 I can't get over you as a child. You look nothing like you do now. No. Yeah, it happens. Your age. You look more like Kitty there than you do yourself. What? Like Kitty there looks like you now.
Starting point is 00:53:45 Oh, it looks like me with my 25-year-old self? Yeah. God, I didn't realise how short she is too. She's tiny. She'd be petite. Kitty Flanagan used to go on Rove Live all the time. Oh, did she? Kitty Flanagan did.
Starting point is 00:53:59 And Carrie Bickmore, that's where she got her start. Oh, yeah. She was on Rove. She did the funny news. Oh, there's some funny shit on YouTube of that. I never watched Rove in my life, but I did look at the Carrie. She did those parody news reports. I love me some Carrie Bickmore on Rove.
Starting point is 00:54:12 Peter Helly was on there, too. Hamish and Andy got their break on Rove. Feels like I missed out. Rove was a great. That was appointment viewing. Yeah. And it was live. That was like the last live, live show.
Starting point is 00:54:24 And then he left and went to try to make it in America. Have you seen Rove Live LA? Oh, I remember that ad for it. No, I have not. I never watched it. It's shocking. I'm going to have to get it up. God, there's been quite a few Australian celebrities try and make it in LA and then just come crawling
Starting point is 00:54:38 back like Delta Goodrum, Rove Live, Mitchell Cheery. He just came right on back. Well, I wanted to be in and out. He couldn't fit on the Harry Potter ride. He's like, fuck this. I'm never going to make it. Hagrid's escaped. I couldn't even get on to escape.
Starting point is 00:54:53 And you left your wand. I left my wand. Yeah, I got the beak of a Hufflepuff picked me on the eye, whatever the fuck it's called. Buck beak. Buck beak. We've been over this. Oh, yeah, you're right.
Starting point is 00:55:04 Here we go. This is Rove Live. Look at the intro. Buckbeak. Buckbeak. We've been over this. Oh, yeah, you're right. Here we go. This is Rove Live. Look at the intro. I'll pop it up for you. It's very sad because it's almost like. Sorry, I'm still unwell. Oh, you poor bastard. The intro, it's got Rovewood, like his name in the Hollywood sign.
Starting point is 00:55:20 Oh, that's a bit lame. It really went all out for him and it didn't land. It got cancelled after about four episodes, I think. Getting it up. Well, I mean, why would that shtick kind of land in LA? Just do your thing in Australia. Yeah, and it was so successful here.
Starting point is 00:55:35 If you do it well. Rebel Wilson's the, oh, for goodness sake. God, you're making this look so difficult. Here we are. Oh, it's on Foxtel. LA, yeah. Fox 8. No one knows who he is.
Starting point is 00:55:52 I don't like him. Grammy award-winning superstar, Pink. Pink. You know what? Big Bang Theory, Jim Parsons. Big Bang Theory guy. Comedian, Chris Hardwick. Oh, Chris Hardwick.
Starting point is 00:56:00 These are all good yet. So you're trying to tell me this show was shit? Yep. They're already on the couch, so he doesn't welcome them in. He's entering the stage. I was going to say, how different is it to the Australian version? So they're on the couch and he comes in. Yeah, already there.
Starting point is 00:56:16 It's very Graham Norton-esque. Oh, yeah, it is true. Let's listen to some of his jokes. Don't forget, for an American audience now. We've got some competition winners who have been in town. They're doing the tourist thing. And I've noticed, like most people as tourists in this city, one of the first things you do when you arrive in Los Angeles,
Starting point is 00:56:38 apart from gawk and wonder at the many mummified corpses, pal walking down the street in a much younger woman's tracksuit... I just can't. I can't do any more. Yeah, I feel like he's a good TV presenter, but I can't recall a time that he's actually made me laugh. No. Didn't he try and bring back Rove Live? He did a reboot in Australia, and I think they did one episode
Starting point is 00:56:58 and the guest was your mate, Jess Malboy, and then they axed it because it was just like not the same. They did two. So it was Saturday Night Rove. Oh, that's it. For pilot week. They did one episode, then it got bought for a series. And then they did another episode, maybe three all up,
Starting point is 00:57:14 then it was canned. Yeah, right. Okay. That was bad. This is Saturday Night Rove. Do we need to watch it all? No problem. We're going to take our word for it.
Starting point is 00:57:22 Just give it a watch. And what's he doing now? Nothing. Nothing. Writing children's books. Is he? Yeah, he writes kids' books. Fuck, a lot of people do that, don't they?
Starting point is 00:57:30 Yeah. I wonder how much cash there is in it, actually. Should we ring Tanya Hennessy? She writes a new book every fucking day. My new book, Stevie and I. Stevie and me. She was meant to come on the podcast to promote her new kids' book, but scheduling clash has never happened.
Starting point is 00:57:44 Maybe we should just invite her in and say, just so you're across it tanya we're inviting you in purely to ask you how much cash you're getting from these fucking books yes don't tell us what the story is don't tell us about the characters and the development and what the creativity means for you don't even tell us the name we want to know about the dots dollar figures don't even say hello we'll go hi Tanya How are you? Give us a number Well we'll do what Rove did She's already sitting here And then we walk in the room and go
Starting point is 00:58:09 Welcome to the show How much money do you make bitch? Don't even say hello It'd be a lot of money I can't think of anyone But there have been a few That I've heard of That do kids books now
Starting point is 00:58:18 And I'm like okay fair enough Yeah Rove did one Andy Lee Andy Lee did one Hamish has done one There must be a market for it. I don't have kids, but maybe I'd buy Hamish and Andy's kids' books for my niece and nephew because I can't think of anything else.
Starting point is 00:58:32 I guess you would. Jimmy Fallon in the US has a couple ones too. It must just be a real easy money. Really? Yeah. Who's someone really unlikely to write a kids' book? I wouldn't want my child reading Harvey Weinstein's Good Night book. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:43 Rolls Harris. If he suddenly put out a kid's book. Yeah, there we go. Oh, have you seen the newest book by Cardinal Pell? My grandson loves it. That's horrid. That's shocking. Oh, disgusting.
Starting point is 00:58:55 What a fucking show today's been. Put in the work, guys. It's a long show. It's a big show. It's a big show. Not many left for the rest of the year, Jenna. Yeah, I know. I know. If you're feeling show. Did you have good the rest of the year, Jenna. Yeah, I know. I know.
Starting point is 00:59:05 If you're feeling show. Did you have good feedback after the announcement last week? Oh, very much so. Amanda Keller wrote back, unreal. She did not. She did. To what? Your Instagram post?
Starting point is 00:59:14 Yeah. Get out. Did she follow you? Yeah. Does she realise that you also upload her podcast, that if you wanted to, you could just host Jonesy and Amanda's podcast over summer? No, she doesn't. You could just upload our
Starting point is 00:59:26 episodes to their feed. I could. If we keep it generic, just say, hi, it's the Jenna show, filling in over summer. Don't mention who you're filling in for. Upload it to the whole fucking network. May as well. 3pm pickup. What's your relationship like with Amanda? So the first thing
Starting point is 00:59:42 in the morning, you're sitting there with your coffee because you're there before her because she's the talent. She goes, morning, morning, Jenna. No, she's there before me. Get out. What time is she there? She gets there at five. She strikes me as the type that needs to get there early
Starting point is 00:59:55 and just like nest for a bit. I'm very much like that. Like if I'm coming in to record and you say, oh, I'm free from six, I'll come in at five just to like. I've noticed that. You're very right. When I do breakfast, I'm on air from, I'll come in at five just to like chill for a bit. I've noticed that. You're very right. When I do breakfast, I'm on air from five, I get in at four just because I need that hour, especially that early in the morning to really fucking wake up.
Starting point is 01:00:12 I also just need to get my shit together and yours half the time because you're a scatterbrain. Yeah. Very true. So many things. I'm just so booked. Booked and blessed. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:00:21 Okay. All right. Should we get out of here then? Wrap it up. It's been a long show. Yeah. It's up to you. What are we doing next week? Oh, Tinder thingamajig. That's back. Yeah, yeah. Okay. All right, should we get out of here then? Wrap it up. It's been a long show. Yeah, it's up to you. What are we doing next week? Oh, Tinder thingamajig.
Starting point is 01:00:27 That's back. Yeah, Tinder fairy tales and fizzes. Actually, no, we should do. Yeah. Because obviously we have to keep Tinder fairy tales and fizzes a bit brand safe because it is sponsored very kindly by Tinder. Yeah. And Steph, who had the fairy tale story, she mentioned,
Starting point is 01:00:46 oh, I've also had a fizzer as well. Oh. And I was like, oh, my God, that fizz is a bit too much. I don't think the brand would like that. That's not brand safe. But, hey, the brand has no control over the secret segment, so this is what Steph told us happened on one of her fizzer dates. Look, I've been dating for a while and I have a huge fizzer story.
Starting point is 01:01:05 Oh, you've got a fizzer too. Love it. Double with me. I do. So this was a few months before I met Mitchell. I matched with this guy and we were talking for a week. The banter was amazing. We have similar interests, similar music tastes.
Starting point is 01:01:19 So it sounds promising. Yeah, I was so excited. And anyways, he decided let's go for a lunch date. So he came and picked me up. It was a 50-minute drive for him. So far, so good. And he's like, I've got this beautiful restaurant in mind. Let's go.
Starting point is 01:01:34 I was like, okay. So we went to this restaurant. It was really lovely. And the whole time I was like, oh, I hope he kisses me. That was just me. Yeah, this sounds great. I'm not sensing a hint of fizz so far. Well, it starts raining and he's like, what's there to do in this area?
Starting point is 01:01:51 I'm like, not really much. We can go see a movie. He goes, oh, there's nothing out that I want to see. Can we go to your place and see a movie? Oh, smooth. I'm like, did you just invite yourself to my house? He's like, yeah. Is that okay?
Starting point is 01:02:04 I'm like, look, I'm going to be straight with you. I do not sleep with people on the first date. Fair enough. He's like, yep, that's fine. I respect that. That's all good. So we go to my house and we put on Thor, the movie, the scary movie. Thor.
Starting point is 01:02:18 I thought you said Thor. Very different films. Yeah, so this whole time I was still a bit nervous, like a bit excited. Oh, is he going to kiss me? Like we're cuddling. He kisses me and then he gets completely naked. Oh, what? But his socks.
Starting point is 01:02:34 Have you removed any item of clothing? Everything but his socks. No, but you, are you descending there fully clothed and he's completely fucking stark as? I am fully, fully clothed. I even had a cardigan on. You were layered. Did he go to the bathroom or did he just start undressing in front of you?
Starting point is 01:02:52 No, it was so quick. It happened like a flash. It was just like one minute you're naked or like, ooh. So we start kissing and anyways, he goes down to my nether region and I was like, oh yeah, this is nice. So I thought I should reciprocate. So he's lying down.
Starting point is 01:03:08 I get on all fours and I go to his downstairs. I was like, oh no, he's not hard so I'll help him out. It was the size of my thumb. He was fully erect. I almost swallowed it whole.
Starting point is 01:03:30 And he was like, wow, you're really good. I'm like, in my head, I'm like, because you have no penis. But anyway. Oh, listen. Yeah. So anyways, I said, look, let's slow this down because I don't want to go any further. He's like, yeah, no, no, no, that's fine. And then he chokes me.
Starting point is 01:03:44 Sorry? What? Yeah. Had you given any indication that that was something you might be into, being choked, because some people are. Well, I pushed him off me and I go, you are lucky I am into that, but you need to give me some warning. Wait, choking you with his hands?
Starting point is 01:04:00 We need to talk about it. Choking you with his hands? Yes. Well, yeah. What did you think? Well, I'm sure he couldn't do it with anything else. Can't choke on a peanut. No, with his hands? We need to talk about it. Choking you with his hands? Yes. Well, yeah. What did you think? Well, I'm sure he couldn't do it with anything else. Can't choke on a peanut. No, with his eyebrows.
Starting point is 01:04:09 Like, of course his hands. Oh, my. Yeah. So I kicked him out. I said I had a party to go to, but it was like 4 p.m. I was like, I've got to get ready, you know, hair, makeup. He's like, oh, yeah, yeah, girl. He goes home and he's like, oh, this party I'm at is so boring and shit.
Starting point is 01:04:25 I'm like, you know what? You made me feel uncomfortable in my own home. He goes, ah, sorry you felt that way. You want to see me again? I was like, no. Oh, wow. I mean, he's got some game even asking instead of taking the hint. Even I'm better at reading social cues than that.
Starting point is 01:04:41 Well, exactly. So all I did was like, no thanks,. Thanks for lunch. And then he blocked me. Audacity. Yeah, no, that's definitely what we call in the biz day. A fizzer. Thank you, Mitchell. Yep. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:04:56 Yeah. That's good. That's a good story. Imagine me sending that to Tinder being like, yeah, so she got choked without consent. Is that good? Are you fine to put your name to that? Yeah, no.
Starting point is 01:05:07 Also, we have to say. That was the unsanctioned off cuts from Tinder fairy tales and fizzes. Yeah. There you go. And also not body shaming, you know, about having a micro penis. You can't control that. Goodness me. Exactly.
Starting point is 01:05:18 Then you make it work for you. Do you? No, I was actually looking at you as I said that. Maybe you have had wet dreams. You just haven't known because they've been inverted. No, definitely not. Because it's a wreck. You'd feel it, right?
Starting point is 01:05:34 Well, you don't really notice it until as it's happening or afterwards. That baffles me that I've never had one. I've even thought as a kid, I can't wait to finally get them now. Never got one. Yeah, wow. I've had sex dreams, but I never feel anything anything and there's never any mess that's weird well it's not dr gay said it's not no i feel that that is weird well you're not a doctor and the doctor said that it's not doesn't everyone have them fuck i'm literally it's literally just me in
Starting point is 01:05:59 this doctor gay didn't yeah he said it was fairly normal maybe you're just hormonal no it happens to everyone well not not as common as yours maybe you're just horny and you need to get it more no i'm actually not i'm fine well that's what he said if you do it more in your normal life you're not going to do it while you sleep again i'm not having them every fucking day okay so what did we say we were doing next week um next week um we say we were doing next week? Next week we said we're doing – More of the Tinder stuff. Yeah, more of the Tinder stuff. Did you ever hear about – because you know how I brought one of my old
Starting point is 01:06:32 Not My Cup of Tea segments? Yeah. And I said, well, now you bring an old segment from your old podcast. Yeah. Did you think of one? Yeah, I messaged Paige, my co-host, and said, come on, and we'll talk to you on the show. And I messaged her and said that.
Starting point is 01:06:46 And she said, hi, who is this? And I said, it's Mitch. She said, Mitch who? I said, oh, Mitch. You're lying. Your old co-host. No, this didn't happen. There's no way that she would have multiple people to whom that sentence applies.
Starting point is 01:06:58 We used to do a show together. Who's this? No, I didn't say that first. She said Mitch. Then she said Mitch who? And I said Mitch. You know, Mitch Shrew from Oh My Mish. She went, oh, what's wrong? She has moved to Bali and she lives a very nomadic life in Bali,
Starting point is 01:07:12 a very herbal essence of life. Like the hair? Yeah, the hair brand. And she drinks from coconut and is loving her life. Wow, I wonder if the day comes that we finish this podcast, if we would ever get to a point where we're estranged, you and Paige are estranged. What a weird thing to say.
Starting point is 01:07:29 I can never go to Bali. What a shame. I'd be treated as a king there. I don't understand. Why can't you go to Bali? Because she's there. She wouldn't recognise you. It's fine.
Starting point is 01:07:37 You're actually nothing to her now. She wouldn't even recognise you. She could come into this studio right now and be like, who are you? She'd go, where the fuck am I? Is that Mitchell Coombs? That's what she'd say. Love your videos. All right, let's go.
Starting point is 01:07:51 I'm exhausted. We will see you next week. And yeah, Mitchell, where can people get tickets to your shows? Just go to my Instagram. The link's in the bio. Yeah. I mean, I would read out the full link, but no one wants to hear that. No, that's the future of technology.
Starting point is 01:08:05 You say link and your device can take you there. That'd be cool. I'm pretty sure Spotify is doing that. Really? They told All Right Hay and I the other day, because we do the Spotify original podcast called Trash Alley, new episodes every Wednesday at 7am. Listen and follow for free only on Spotify. And they told us that there's something like that coming, like mid-episode if we're debating something.
Starting point is 01:08:26 Like, for example, if we're saying, you've never had a wet dream, that's ridiculous, you can have a poll pop up in the middle of the Spotify app. There's a poll while you listen. Oh, that's cool. That is smart. And then we can check who voted what. Very interactive.
Starting point is 01:08:40 Anyway, you wouldn't understand what it's like to work for such a high-tech company like that. No, I wouldn't, no. No. Your microphone's currently duct-taped to the-tech company like that. No, I wouldn't. No. No. Your microphone's currently duct-taped to the fucking pole. Yeah, it is. It really is. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:08:50 Take that off now. There we are. This one too. Anyway, thanks for listening to the show, everyone. We'll catch you back next week, guys. Bye, everyone. Can't wait. Thanks for listening.
Starting point is 01:09:00 Love you. Bye. Hope this makes you feel 3% better. Oh, I forgot. Fuck. I hope this podcast made you feel at least 3% better today. Love you. Thanks, everyone.
Starting point is 01:09:11 Bye. Oh, no. We don't need to block him. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you hit follow on your podcast app

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