Is It Just Me? - #96: Schapelle Corby Replied!

Episode Date: February 14, 2022

In this episode: Do you feel like you’ve done nothing with your life at age 25? (06:18) Bucks and Hens nights (11:53) Details of our new merch (17:27) Eric Dane’s cock in Euphoria (18:46) Did Churi just FART?! (21:11) Following up on… Churi’s pitch to Australian Bananas (25:55) Jonesy & Amanda talk Jenna’s driving lesson (29:11) Did we get a reply from Kerri-Anne or Patti Newton? (31:51) Did we get a reply from Cocaine Cassie? (34:27) “Oh shit, it’s Emmy Meli” (37:32) Did we get a reply from Schapelle Corby? (39:02) Our “Secret Segment” ADDebrief (46:52)   Follow us @coupleofmitchesSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

People do some weird shit. Would you like to try a vape? Why would you take up something that is going to be addictive and expensive? I think for people... I'll tell you why. Yeah. Because you're young and stupid. Some things make more sense than others.

You mentioned that your goal was to be healthy, and I just don't know how you figure that's going to happen when you're ordering a chocolate mousse. No. You know, I had it in the car on the way home, and I didn't have a spoon, so I was like an armadillo trying to get ants out of a hole. Brace yourself for the rude shocks of young adulthood.

Being fingered is an awful sensation. You haven't been fingered by the right person. Goodness me. This is Is It Just Me? Hosted by a couple of bitches. Hi, it's Jenna. Please don't forget to include my name in the opener this season. I'm sorry.

Ta-da! Now, here's Mitch Chooley and Mitchell Coon. Episode 96, you need a quick fix? Oh, quick fix. Sure thing. Pretty long fix, actually. We are quite long-winded. Takes us a while to get things done around here.

From what I've heard, you're quite partial to a quickie. Oh yeah, I'm trying to work on that actually. I don't like a quickie. I don't like it. I think Hayden's more inclined to have a quickie, but I don't like it. Oh, you want to take your time and he won't allow you. That's rare. How many couples have that problem? I need preparation. I need to know. I need to get the mindset.

I need to have at least a litre of water and I need to be fully, fully ready to do it. Alright, so he wants quickies in addition to actual lovemaking. Yes. But you're like, no, if I'm doing it, I'm to have at least a litre of water, and I need to be fully, fully ready to do Alright, so he wants quickies in addition to actual lovemaking. Yes. But you're like, no, if I'm doing it, I'm doing it properly. Yeah, I want romance. Oh, God love you. You're such a softie.

I want to be connected. Eye contact. What music do you play? We don't play music. Oh, I thought you said music, sorry. No, I would love it, but like I said, we don't get it. Sounds like there's some issues that need working through here. Let's call Hayden and say, listen, your partner wants music and to take his time.

Is that too much to ask? No, no, no. He just wants to get in there and get it done. Yeah, right. And I like to really milk the process. Oh, now I'm picturing. They run a tight ship at TikTok, don't they? They really do.

It's like, I haven't got time for passionate embracing. Nah, get it done. He's like, at work, I've got to focus on 60-second videos, and I'd like my lovemaking to be quite the same. True. And I go, sure thing. I reckon things like TikTok have really ruined people's attention span. work, I've got to focus on 60-second videos, and I'd like my lovemaking to be quite the same. True. And I go, sure thing. I think things like TikTok have really ruined people's attention span. Oh, I agree. Like, I unfollowed so many people on Instagram last week

because I was like, boring, boring, boring, boring, boring. If I'm not engaged straight away, I'm just like, no. And it takes so much for me to hit the follow button on TikTok. Like, you've really got to make me in love with you to get a follow out of me. Yeah, that's changed too. I feel like in the early days of TikTok, when it was new and novel, everyone would hit follow. I'd post one video and get like 10,000 extra followers.

Now you've got to work for it. You've got to really work for it. You really have to work for it. Like, your 20 million view video, any new followers from that? Nah, I reckon lucky to get 5,000 more. I heard this theory that if you compare the amount of followers you have on TikTok to the amount of likes that you have on TikTok, because it tells you your overall like count. Yeah. That tells you that you're not hot enough for the follow, but you're funny enough for the like.

Wait, wait, wait. So if you're fugly, you have a lot of likes, but not a lot of followers, which is probably more me. I've got 6 million likes and 208,000 followers. Let me check. They're like, yeah, I enjoyed that, but I don't want to see your face ever again. I don't want to stick around. That was, yeah, it's. Let me check. They're like, yeah, I enjoyed that, but I don't want to see your face ever again. I don't want to stick around. That was, yeah, it's like a quick fuck. It's like, yeah, I love that for the 60 seconds that it was, but never again.

Yeah, no thanks. I'm not signing up for more. Yeah, I've got 19.1K followers and 2.5 million likes. I'm fuggly as well. There you go. We're both fuggers. I'm just fat. You're fuggly.

I'm fat. Oh. But they're not mutually exclusive. No. You can be both. True. Fuggly, fat, and femme. Welcome, Pricekeeper Jenna. That should be the new name of the show for season both. True. Fugly, Fat and Femme. Welcome, Pricekeeper Jenna.

That should be the new name of the show for season four. Hello. Fugly, Fat, Femme. Jenna, can we just talk about, obviously, the driving lesson we did last week, episode 95. Can we just talk about the message your mother sent you? Yes, absolutely. You're beloved, mother. We've had her on the show before.

Yes, she's famous. Beatrice, what's her name? Rosalyn. I knew it was old English. It was she's been. What's her name? Rosalyn. I knew it was old English. It was Rosalyn. What did she do? Because we recorded the video. As you can see, if you haven't seen it yet, it's on a couple of minutes' Instagram.

We started off in a hospital car park. Yes, that's the thing. So she has the Find My Friends app. So she knows where I am. Why do you allow your mother? You're a grown woman and you allow your mother to track your everything. I think that I might be kidnapped one day. So it's good to have that. You have a complex, do you allow your mother, you're a grown woman and you allow your mother to track your every move? I think that I might be kidnapped one day so it's good to have that. You have a complex do you? Yes. Well you do live in a

service suite, there's security, that's part of the service. She hasn't got a complex, she's got tickets. She's like, who wouldn't want to kidnap this? No! Anyway, during the driving lesson, we started in the car park like you said, at the hospital. And we were there

for quite some time setting up and everything yeah she went on the app thought oh i wonder where she is how her driving is where she's driving at that hospital for a while she thought she saw that we were at the oh no hospital parked in the parking lot and she's had bad memories there because her dad was there a lot as well in that same same hospital? Yes, that exact same one. What are the odds? And she called the hospital to ask whether I'd been admitted because she thought that I'd crashed the car and possibly endangered the lives of both of you and Sam.

Gee, she just doesn't really think you're very capable as a human, does she? No. Because if she was tracking your every move, she would have seen you drive from my house to the hospital car park and then thought that 500 metre or whatever drive, she fucked it. She fucked it. She's had a severe accident and they've taken her to the emergency ward. She's killed all three of them.

So she fully thought we were in hospital. Yeah, she tried contacting them. Poor thing. She would have been worried sick if she's anything like a daughter. Now also that driving lesson we did with Jenna got us some air time on WSFM. Jonesy and Amanda called her in to talk about that. We'll play a bit of that audio later on as well because Jenna's just been called in by

the big bosses to talk about her incapabilities as an adult. I've been labelled a loser by Jonesy and Amanda for being on my learner's permit. Takes one to know one. Alright, that's later in the show. How are we? Are we all good? We're in great moods? Ready for the show?

Yep, I'm ready to get into this. All right, let's dive in. This is Is It Just Me? Every week we start the show the same way with two Is It Just Me's. We call them idjams. They're something we've noticed, something we hate or appreciate. Observations about life. Mitch doesn't know mine.

I don't know Mitch's. And we just jump right in. You can go first, Mitchell. Oh, I went first last week. Oh, this special treatment show. I'm in a giving mood. Like in the bedroom. Let's get some candles going. Let God, this special treatment. I'm in a giving mood. Like in the bedroom. Let's get some candles going.

Let's play some sex music. I'm such a giving person. I think that's the takeaway out of all this. Yeah, right. Okay. It's less impressive when you have to tell everyone how giving you are. Anyway, Bradley, cue me in, honey. Let's go.

Is it just me or? Do you feel like you've done nothing with your life at age 25? Don't look me directly in the eyes as you say that. I mean, yes and no. Yes and no. Oh, well, I didn't really feel that way until recently. I caught up with my grandmother. I hadn't seen her for ages.

And we were at lunch. My mum was there too. And we're chatting. I can't remember. My mind wandered. They were talking about sport. Oh, God. This was in Buggin' Gate when you were back in Christmas, wasn't it? No, no, no. This is mum's mother. So the't remember. My mind wandered. They were talking about sport. Oh, God, yeah. This was in Bugging Gate when you were back in Christmas, was it?

No, no, no. This is mum's mother, so the Sydney grandmother. Ah, got it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Haven't seen her for a couple of years because of COVID and whatever and just because I'm a bad person. And anyway, we were catching up. They're talking about tennis or something and then out of nowhere,

so nonchalantly, my grandmother says, yeah, I was engaged to a professional tennis player once before I met your father. And Jane's like, what? My mum had no idea about this. She just kept that little secret to herself. Dropped the bomb on us. Yep. And she goes, yeah, no, we were engaged.

And then he moved down the coast, I had to stay in Sydney because of work. And then he got a new girlfriend and then he was hit by a bus and he died. What? And I was like, what the fuck? What? A bus? Yeah. Also, that sounds like, what the fuck? What? A bus. Yeah. Also, that sounds sus, doesn't it?

Hit by a bus and died, move on. Oh, you've got a new girlfriend, all of a sudden hit by a bus. Sounds like Nan put a hit out on him. Did she get an inheritance? Does she have a nice tennis racket hanging on the wall? Did she get anything from him? I don't think so because there were no clues. Mum had no idea that happened.

Oh, my God. But I'm like, how the fuck? Because she was younger than I am now and she's already a widow. To a tennis star. Actually, Sam, can you Google professional tennis players that died tragically on the south coast or something? Because I just need to know.

Tennis player hit by bus, mysteriously. Add that in. I feel like that wouldn't be hard to track down. But anyway. Wow. So by my age, Nan was a widow and as far as my mother goes, she was divorced and remarried Wow. So by my age, Nan was a widow and as far as my mother goes, she was divorced and remarried to my father by my age and I'm like, Jesus fuck, I've really just done nothing, have I? No.

Even Nan says, but I, well that's all in the past. We've all got stories and I'm thinking, I don't. What stories have I got? I know what you mean. It can make you feel really inadequate. My grandmother dropped the bombshell on all of us a couple months ago that she was born under a camel. What?

In Coober Pedy. Is your grandmother's name Jesus Christ? No, she's not. No, she's not. But she was born under a camel because she was walking through the desert plains in Coober Pedy. And she was walking in the womb. In the womb. Well, she was being carried. She was being carried. And it got really hot and her mum went into labour. So they were like, shit, where's the nearest shade under this giant camel?

So she was birthed under a camel on the desert plains. What was a heavily pregnant woman doing in the desert plains? That's just asking the trouble, isn't it? That's why my middle name's Camel. By the way, I just thought of this. My sister had a baby. Oh! When?

Speaking of giving birth. When? Last week, at the time of recording, today. Oh! When? Speaking of giving birth. When? Last week at the time of recording. Today. Oh, bless her. Little Ella Mary. Ella Mary! Didn't take any of my fucking name suggestions.

That's a shame. Congratulations. That's her third baby. Congratulations. And that just further adds to my point. She had fucking, she was married with one kid by 25. So, yeah, what am I doing? But we have different priorities and we get to change the, you know, the culture.

We don't have to do what our parents and grandparents did. We're different people. I suppose so. But even when people ask me, you know how people always say, what's your worst date story? Blah, blah, blah. I don't even have any of those because they've all just been equally shit. worst date story, blah, blah, blah. I don't even have any of those because they've all just been equally shit.

And, like, I just feel like in that area of my life, my love life, I've not done much. I've got no stories to tell like my grandmother. And when you do have a story, you waste it on this god-awful podcast. You come on here and tell us. Well, no, that's the thing. I fucking don't have any love life stories to tell. There's nothing going on there, is there?

Yeah, what's going on there? I haven't heard an update on your love life. There aren't any. Really? None? You're not dating anyone? Well, what's going on there? I haven't heard an update on your love life. There aren't any. Really? None? You're not dating anyone? Well, no. God, no. I feel like I'm closer than I was this time last year to being like, oh, yeah, I should

go on dates again. At the start of last year, do you remember, I was like, yeah, I'm going to get out and go on more dates and shit. Yeah. I wanted to wait until after I left my job because I was so tired. And that was, what, June? Went into lockdown in July. Oh, no.

So that kind of fucked it and then i think when did we come out of lockdown october october yeah october to december i don't know i was just still feeling flat not in the mood to go out on dates and stuff and so yeah i went i had a bit of a dry year last year yeah we've all been there and i don't know i don't know if i can be bothered still are you back on the apps you're talking to people yeah yeah i've still got you know i still use the apps but i'm just kind of like do you flirt is there like a bit of phone sex a bit of kinky stuff? Yeah, but I don't know.

Man is so disappointing. I just don't know if I can be bothered. Yeah. Historically speaking, I just end up chatting to someone, going on a couple of dates, and then after a few months, when you get to that, you know, the crossroads where it's like, oh, do we keep dating and become official or do we fuck this off? We just fuck it off.

And I'm like, oh, what a waste of time. You know what? Take a leaf out of your nan's book and just when you get to that crossroads, push them in front of a bus. True. Noted. Kill them. Yeah, a leaf out of your nan's book and just when you get to that crossroads, push them in front of a bus. True. Noted. Kill them. Murder. Mass murder.

That's the next tip. I think you're very successful, Mitchell. Let that be a warning to anyone that matches me on Tinder. If it doesn't work out, I'll throw you under an actual moving vehicle. Heavy vehicle at that. If Mitch suggests catching the bus to the date location, don't turn up! Not that I would ever do that. He'll kill you!

We're proud of you. You're very successful in our eyes, Mitchell. Thank you. I feel like I'm just going to have to date a few douchebags on purpose just so I've got stories to tell my grandkids. Yeah, no, but I feel like that with Hayden. I'm like, we're very happy. We're very in love.

Like, you know, for all intents and purposes, we think we'll go the whole way. Okay, quick brainstorm. Why don't you go cheat on Hayden today? Yeah. And then you'll have stories to tell about that. That's brilliant. Everything that unfolded afterwards.

Sam, download me Grindr. Can do. Thank you. Use your pictures, though. Don't use mine. Thanks. All right. We ready for my agent?

Sure. Hit me. Let's do it. Is it just me? Do you find strippers absolutely obnoxious? I can't say I've ever mingled with them, to be honest. Why are they obnoxious. I can't say I've ever mingled with them, to be honest. Why are they obnoxious? I think male

strippers are obnoxious, and I think female strippers are fantastic. Okay, yeah, I can see that. Thank you, thank you. There's a clear distinction. Because in the last fortnight, I have had both my first hens party and my first bucks party. Yeah, I'm still seething with jealousy that you got invited to both. I got invited to neither. Yeah, Mitch said this.

Oh no, really? So because I'm gay, Jenna, and I've got Hayden, Becky's like come to the girls one, it'll be great because you know we're so close, he's my sister, you know, gay, you know all the girls. But then my sister's fiancé Kurt was like, oh, I want you in my groomsmen, you're a groomsman, come with the boys because you should bond with them and also you're my brother-in-law.

And I'm like, okay, I see both sides of the story. So I did go to both. But Mitchell's sister didn't invite him. To be fair, my sister wasn't invited either. She didn't want a hen, so mum just had one without her. Wait, hold on. Your sister's hens didn't even involve her? Yeah, because her and her husband at the time in particular,

they weren't really party people. They didn't drink much. Got it. So they were like, no, we don't really want one. And so mum had her own hen's party with the girls out in Bogengate and then Ian did the same thing. He had a buck's party with the boys out in Bogengate and I got invited to neither.

I'm just that gender neutral. I'm not a buck or a hen. Can we please backtrack? You're a frog. So were either of them invited to their own parties? I thought I established that. Were you listening? No, neither were invited.

Well, technically, I'm sure they would have said to them, I mean, you can come if you want, but we're going to have it without you. And they were fine not going. I think my brother-in-law had his own Bucks thing in Newcastle, but no, my dad had his own one being like, my daughter's getting married, woo-hoo. That's cute. Oh, I actually like that.

See, but my parents went all out. So my dad helped organise the Bucks and my mum helped organise the Hens. So the point about the strippers is the female strippers, incredible. Like, they're doing the Lord's work. I have never been in a room where so many naked women have such control over a man. That pussy power. Jenna's waving her hand in the air. Look at her.

Jenna's like, yeah, I know, I'm aware of my power. She's like, how do you think I got on Jonesy and a man? Jonesy was drooling at the thought of you coming on the one. Oh, don't. No. You can't be putting shit like that out there. No, no, no, no. He's a red-blooded man.

My dad always says it. I'm like, I'm red-blooded too. What the fuck? You think I got blue blood, you dickhead? Anyway, the women on the table, the men are drooling. Mitch, their mouths are agape. Are the women literally on the table? On the table, yeah.

So we're sitting there, me and Hayden, and they bring the food out. It's a titty bar with food service. And they bring the food out and some lady comes over and she goes, Hi, I'm Scarlet Rose. We go, Hi, Miss Rose. She goes, Would you guys like pepper on your carbonara? And Hayden's like, Yeah, I'd love pepper, actually. We've got a bit of food.

So she kicks his chair out with her stiletto foot. The chair squeaks on the wooden floors. She opens her legs, straddles my partner in life. Which is a total waste of time, by the way. Why try and titillate a gay man? Exactly. Numb from the waist down. And then she starts grinding.

I'm going to do it to the microphone. Grinding the pepper mill like this. She's jerking a dick. Yeah. But she's not actually grinding it, so Hayden is so uncomfortable. I hope that's not how you jerk a dick. No wonder Hayden wants it to be over and done with quickly. Explains the rash.

And then she gets up, kisses him on the cheek, and after all that, he didn't even get any pepper, which he actually wanted. He wanted the pepper. So it was just hot. The women were hot. They were scissoring on the table. I felt a bit awkward, to be perfectly honest,

but they were there. They were getting paid. They loved it. I spoke to some of the girls. In fact, when they found out Hayden and I were gay, they did not even give us a bar of attention. Well, yeah, like I said, absolute waste of time trying to titillate you. You're not going to slide cash into their g-string, are you?

No, I tried to connect. I was like, hey, this is me and my boyfriend. She goes, great. Goes to the tea room. Goes, ladies, two fags with a quiff. Don't even bother. Dicks don't work. So we didn't get to talk to them.

It was really awful. What sort of things would you have talked to them about? Like, hey babe, I know you're working, but are you watching Euphoria? What do you even say? I want it to be like, you know, that we stand. Like, yeah, woo, your power. We have it too. I don't know. I want it to connect. Like, you know, a gay man to woman. You have that connection. I don't

think you need to vocalise. Hey, I respect you and what you're doing. I think they just assume that's why you're there. No, but when you're in a room full of men howling at them. What were they behaving like? That's gross. I just got the biggest ick from that. Drawling.

Anyway, fast forward to the Hens night, which was this most recent weekend. Yep. Boring. Oh, really? This male stripper had to stoop to the low of breathing fire to draw attention in the room. He didn't have anyone's attention, so he literally poured ethanol in his mouth and lit it and then was pouring fire through the living room. Like it was a circus. Like it was Cirque du Soleil.

Did he juggle? No, he didn't. Well, what a shame. That makes me feel a bit better about not being invited to the hens, knowing that yours was boring. Because I full-on argued with my mother. She goes, no, it's just for us girls. And I'm like, yeah, just us girls. What do you mean?

That's why I want to come. Is it just me? You can follow the show online. Just search Couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead. Now, just quickly, before we get into the is it just you's and all that, Sam, did you find any information about dead tennis players

back in the day? Did my grandmother murder her ex-fiance? Nah, I feel like I need to go to the library and get one of those big old, you know those things that you have to roll through old newspapers if I want to find any info. Roller decks. Well, if you're not busy, off to the library. Okay, don't mind me.

Thank you, Sam. Hey, we you're not busy, off to the library. Okay, don't mind me. Thanks. Thank you, Sam. Hey, we have a very exciting announcement. I think I've got some merch music for it. What the hell? I don't know. I couldn't find merch music. We don't have to make copyright, too.

It's old enough that we don't have to pay for it. Now, if you've been singing for our new merch, it is now officially for sale. Yay! So head to the link in our Instagram bio, okay? My God, this merch is, I think it's the best we've ever done. It's really the second we've ever done. I think it's quite sexy. So if you want the t-shirts, the singlet tops, they're all oversized, nice and baggy, nice and comfy.

They come in black and tie-dye. They're up on our Instagram now if you want to click the link in bio. That's where you can do some shopping. Also, this year we have PopSockets. We do. I love a good PopSocket. They're in different colours as well, so I reckon we're going to have to fight it out as to who sells the most.

Oh, interesting. All right. But the merch is available now. Go enjoy. Go and buy. And send us photos wearing it. We'd love to see it. Yes, please do.

It's going to be on sale until the end of February. So get your orders in, and then after the end of February. So get your orders in. And then after the end of February, they'll get all made and sent out. You don't have long. All this summer clothing should arrive in time for the dead of winter. Yep. Exactly right. And we planned this real well.

I tried. I tried. You could wear the singlet over the t-shirt. Buy both. But anyway, better late than never. The merch is there. Go have a look, guys. Sorry it took longer than I would have liked. But hey, enjoy.

We do it because we love you. Speaking of you, what's doing? Is it just you? This is where we get you guys, the listeners, to jump on and send us a voice message. You can call us too. You can have it live. Yeah. And is it just me of your own?

So just hit us up at couple of Mitch's on Instagram if you want to either come on the show and talk on the phone or just send a voice message. It's up to you. Maybe you're like Mitch's boyfriend and you just want to keep it short and sweet. Yeah, that's right. Or maybe you're like me and you want to milk the shit out of it. Yeah, maybe you want to come on for some foreplay. Oh!

All right, today this is just you comes in from Juan. Rightio, what have you got for us, Juan? Is this me or are we all disappointed that Eric Dane from Euphoria is wearing a prosthetic cock in the show? Jeez, well, I'm disappointed that you didn't start that voice note at the very beginning. Eric Dane from Euphoria is wearing a prosthetic cock in the show. Jeez, Will, I'm disappointed that you didn't start that voice note at the very beginning. Who did he say in Euphoria is wearing a prosthetic cock? Eric. He said Eric.

Are we all disappointed that Eric Dane from Euphoria is wearing a prosthetic cock in the show? Okay. So is Eric Dane the actor? Yes, Eric Dane is the actor. He plays the role of Cale, I believe. I'm not watching Euphoria, but Hayden is. Do you guys watch it?

No. I've only watched the first episode, but I've been meaning to watch more of it because I've heard it's great. Yeah, everyone's talking about it. The hype is real and it is so horny. It's such a horny show. Sam, can you please Google verbatim Eric Prosthetic Cock? I don't know how to feel about this because Hayden watches Euphoria and I find myself

getting jealous or envious. Why? Because it's like 18-year-olds having hot gay young sex and here's Hayden watching it when I'm not home. I'm like, if it was a straight sex scene, I'd be fine. But the fact that there's gay sex and it's so progressive, I feel a bit weird. Well, do you watch porn still, even though you're in a relationship?

Yeah, of course. Does he watch porn? Yeah. though you're in a relationship? Yeah, of course. Does he watch porn? Yeah. Is it independent of each other? It can be anything. Or together? Yeah, it can be anything. So both.

You watch it together and separately. Yeah. Well, then what's the difference? No, I know. Very true. I don't think they're showing full-on gay fucks in Euphoria. Although, look at that photo. Oh, that prosthetic cock.

Right. Yeah, there it is there. Oh, wow. That's the cock there. The skin tone is completely different on the prosthetic cock based on the rest of his body. So I don't know if that's... I'm not disappointed. They could have done a better job with that.

I agree. There is so much cock in Euphoria, it's not funny. I don't think I want to watch it if there's heaps of cock, Ben. But also, I guess to Juan's point, I'm never disappointed when there's a prosthetic penis. I mean, that doesn't worry me. Yeah, nah. It's so obviously fake.

We don't really care, Juan. No skin on Juan's nose. Just image. If you've got an issue just you of your own uh hit us up at a couple of inches we'll play it on the show yeah now before we move on I just wanted to bring something up with you Mitchell yeah um you know how obviously we're back for a new season of the podcast season four and because it's the start of a new season we wanted to get new voiceover stuff from our voiceover guy, Bradley. Bradley, of course. You know, the guy that does these sound effects. Bradley does the Is It Just Me?

Is it just me? Yeah, it's great. So you and I came up with a bunch of things to say, like for Bradley to read in a new script for the new year, getting a bunch of new stuff done. And you recorded it with him. I wasn't there, but you recorded it with him in studio. Because we both work at Kiss, so he's here and I'm here.

And so when I listened back to the audio to edit it down for one of the sweepers, I noticed something. What do you mean? You mean the unedited studio session? Yes, and I've put the audio over there on the little sound effects board. Oh, I should know. Anonymous grab. Oh, my God.

I always get thrown by it. You haven't cottoned on yet. When I say leave the room, it's not fucking around with the computer. It means I've got a grab. Okay, anonymous grab. Oh, my God. I always get thrown by it. Yeah. You haven't cottoned on yet. When I say leave the room, it's not fucking around with the computer. It means I've got a grab. Okay. So there was something I heard in Bradley's voiceover session with you. I'm pretty sure you farted. I'm just going to call a spade a spade here.

Mitch. I was hoping he said something racist so we could cancel him. No. No. No. Don't besmirch beautiful Bradley. Not that he ever would. Not that he ever would.

So listen out. It's not when he's talking off air. It's when, don't besmirch beautiful Bradley. Not that he ever would, not that he ever would. So listen out. It's not when he's talking off air. It's when he actually starts voicing the sweeper. So I just waited for him to actually speak on mic to shit myself. Yeah, which is just the worst timing ever. So listen closely, headphone users. Turn this up. Listen out for the fart.

All right. Okay, I'll just let you finish. I don't want you to be swallowing. Okay, all right. Thank you very much. Thank you, man. So are you ready? All right, I'm ready. Okay, right. Okay, I'll just let you finish. I don't want you to be swallowing. Okay, all right. Thank you very much. Thank you, man. So are you ready? All right, I'm ready.

Okay, right. Spotify, now do ratings. If you don't leave five stars, you are dead and suck. Okay, just listen carefully again. It's when he says ratings. Ratings. Hold on. I'm sorry. Did you hear that? You farted. Ratings. Hold on. I'm sorry.

Did you hear that? You farted. Let me turn my headphones up. And he did call you out at the start of the recording there. He said, oh, I don't want you to be swallowing when I'm talking. So you must have been eating. Yeah, I was eating. Ratings.

Ratings. It's in the tea. Ratings. Yeah. No, I think that's just a frog in his throat. That's not coming from my ass. I know, it sounded so distant. Ratings. That's not coming from my ass. I know. It sounded so distant. Ratings.

That's not from my butt. But it's just, what the hell was it? You must have been eating something spicy. Wait, how do you know it wasn't Brad that farted? He was on mic. My mic was off. I think he's here. Go get him.

Bring him in because he definitely pooed. It wouldn't have been Bradley. Ratings. Go again. Ratings. It's comical. And Bradley's so in the zone, it didn't throw him. Bradley's here. He must be again. Ratings. See? It's comical. And Bradley's so in the zone, I didn't throw him. Bradley's here.

He must be outside. Can we call him in? Can you get him, Sam? Brad, have you got a sec? Oh, Bradley. Bradley, it's us, our voiceover artists. We just want to discuss. So are you blaming?

Oh, here he is. Hi, Bradley. Can you hear that, Bradley? No, I can't. I'm sure you're right. Bear with us. There we go. Hello, Brad. Can you hear that, Bradley? No, I can't. But I'm sure you run. No, no, bear with us. There we go. There we go. Hello, everybody.

Something's been brought to my attention. You are the fantastic VO behind the show. Who we love. During the session that you and I did prior to the season starting last month, Mitch has found something in the background of the audio. You didn't say any. You weren't throwing any aspersions. It was fine.

But something's happened happened and he's blaming me. Yeah, let's play this little thing between us. Listen now, when you say the word ratings, I'm thinking that Mitchell Cheery dropped his guts and farted. Listen real carefully. I would never blame you, you're too much of a gentleman. No, I mean, what happens in the

studio with the offcuts should stay in the offcuts. That's the reason I was farting. Okay, I'll just let you finish. I don't want you to be swallowing. Okay, alright. Thank you very much. So are you ready? Alright, I'm ready.

Spotify, now do ratings. If you don't leave five stars, you are dead inside. Did you hear that? I heard a fluff that was not of my making. Unmistakable. Wait, wait, wait. Ratings.

That wasn't my... Did you notice anything during the session? Did you hear that in the session? Well, I'm in the zone. That's what I said. Yes. Well, I'm dropping a VO, and it sounds like you were dropping something else.

Get out. I wasn't. No, I wasn't. It definitely wasn't you, Bradley. Thank you. We love your work, Bradley. Was there't. No, I wasn't. It definitely wasn't you, Bradley. Thank you. We love your work, Bradley. Was there a pong in the studio after or not? He's left.

That's embarrassing. Here I am trying to boost our Spotify ratings and you're fucking dropping your guts in the studio. Disgusting. Okay, well, everyone, keep an ear out for that sweep because that's the only take he did, so... I'm just going to have to run with the fart one. Is it just me spotify now do ratings if you don't leave five stars you are dead inside now there's a few things

we need to follow up from last week's episode yeah episode 95 it was a big first week back here we have some loose ends to tie up so if you're one of those weirdos that's been listening to our podcast in reverse chronological order, this is going to make absolutely no sense. Go listen to episode 95 first. Sort your shit out. Yeah, we've got a few things to follow up on. Firstly, is it just me last week? You were trying to be the new face of Australian bananas.

Yes, I was trying to take Jessica Rowe's one form of income and steal Australian bananas sponsorship. And I have an update here, actually. Oh, I was trying to take Jessica Rose's one form of income and steal Australian bananas sponsorship. And I have an update here, actually. Oh, my God, really? Yeah, I printed it out for us. So we sent off the jingle that you did on the spot. You did a jingle for Australian bananas. Wait, you actually sent it?

Yeah, we reached out and said, Oi, throwing some dosh our way. If you missed it, this is the jingle. This is what we missed last week. We didn't hear it. It's a banana. Yellow, long, fun. You can shake it.

You can vape it. You can mash it. You can blend it. Easy. Yellow. Tasty. Hello, Australian banana. Australian banana.

Australian bananas. Australian bananas. Australian bananas. Get them at your local green grocer. There we go. How could you say no to that, right? I know, compelling. Brilliant audio. Improvised on the spot. Free.

They don't have to go to an ad agency. All they have to do is hire us. Yeah, exactly. So we did send that off to Australian bananas, whoever they are. Yep. And Jenna, have you heard this response? No. No, I really haven't.anas, whoever they are. Yep. And Jenna, have you heard this response? No. You've got to reply.

No, I really haven't. This is from Bruce B. Banana. How would the head of Bananas speak? Hello, Mitchell. How do Bananas in Pyjamas speak? Oh, yeah, how do Bananas in Pyjamas speak? Actually, they're mute, aren't they? They don't speak.

Are they mute? Don't they? No, they definitely speak. Really? Yeah. What the fuck would the show be without dialogue? I don't speak. Are they mute? Don't they? I'm pretty sure they don't. No, they definitely speak. Really? What the fuck would the show be without dialogue? I don't know. It's a couple of bananas. I'll give you some banana music.

Hold on. This is the reply from Australian Bananas. Hello, Mitchells. Thanks so much for sharing this. We will share with the client. We love that this has been included in the podcast. Banana emoji. We are always looking for influencers to partner up with for bananas.

There isn't anything in the pipeline right now, but we will get in touch if the right opportunity comes up. Bastards! It sounds like a thanks but no thanks. Fucking bananas. I'm more of a mango boy anyway. Actually, I'm not kidding. I had such a craving for bananas after last week.

I bought a whole bunch. Did you really? And I eat them every morning for breakfast now. That's what confuses me. Who the fuck gets that money? How does Australian Bananas Conglomerate make money? Yeah, how do they measure the success of their investment? Like if they're paying for ads, how do you measure how many more bananas?

Is there monthly banana ratings? Yeah, I have no idea. Lady Finger, Outbeat, Traditional this month. Maybe they just thought, joke's on you, you've already done a jingle, you've already promoted bananas on the podcast, so why would we pay you to do something if it's already happened? True. Maybe they just thought, we can't have two chaotic hosts.

Or Jessica Rose singing in that banana suit. All right, well, that's the end of our banana collaboration. Thank you all. Good try. Like I always say, you don't get anything end of our banana collaboration. Thank you. Good try. Like I always say, you don't get anything if you don't ask. That's right. Sometimes the answer's no, but whatever, you move on. Another update with more.

Yep, so Jenna's driving lesson that we did last week, she got dragged into the WSFM studio with Jonesy and Amanda because they wanted to kick her while she's down, really, just rubbing the fact that she's a grown-ass adult that doesn't have a driver's licence. At 28, yes. And they did a whole segment about it, didn't they? They got other elderly people to call in and talk about things

they can't do. Exactly. That they really should be able to do. How did you commit to it? Did they just pull you in randomly in the morning? They pulled me in. They said, we're doing a segment on late learners. You're a late learner.

You're old to learn how to drive. Come in. It's embarrassing. I heard the audio because we make fun of Amanda Keller in it. We don't make fun of her. We use her name in our video. Why don't we play a little bit of it now and then we'll upload the whole segment as a bonus podcast. So if you want to hear the whole thing, if you want to hear all the other geriatrics ringing in to make Jenna feel better, there'll be a bonus episode.

But this is the gist of it. Our digital producer, we love her. Her name is Jenna. She's 28 years old. She has recently decided to learn to drive. She takes part in a podcast with, they're called A Couple of Mitches. Yeah, I've heard of them. And it's called Is It Just Me?

Is It Just Me or Is It A Couple of Mitches? It's called Is It Just Me. How many names has this podcast got? Is It Just Me? We'll just call it one thing, one thought per break. Can I tell you this? It's called Is It Just Me with a couple of Mitches. It's called Is It Just Me? How many names has this podcast got? Is It Just Me? We'll just call it one thing, one thought per break. Can I tell you this? It's called Is It Just Me with a couple of Mitches and Jenna. Oh, my God.

The printing alone will kill your podcast. Can I continue? Sure you can. We have Jenna with us. Hello, Jenna. Hello. So you're 28. Did you have a scary moment?

I got my licence, my L's, when I was 16 and then I was so horrified when I started to learn to drive I didn't my L's when I was 16. And then I was so horrified when I started to learn to drive. I didn't get my license till I was 27. So all those years in between, I ignored it. Yeah, that's pretty much what happened to me. So I started driving when I was like 16, 17, like a few lessons, but I just wasn't good at it. So I thought I'll never be good at it. So I just gave up. Do you enjoy driving? So I thought I'll never be good at it.

So I just gave up. Do you enjoy driving? Well, it wasn't until I drove with Mitch's that I realised that I could do it and that I was enjoying it. Before that, I was like, oh, I don't know if I want to do it. I don't know if I enjoy it. I'm a bit scared. But now I feel like I've done it once. I can do it again.

Gee, thanks for your support, Jonesy. Wow. What a steadfast plug that was. I told you he was besotted by Jenna's pussy power. I'm sorry, but that further proves my point that Jenna is more powerful than any of us because of her vagina. Wow. He was so nice to our face back in episode 80 when he came on our show.

For him to rubbish our name like that. Disgusting. Amanda loves us, she can tell. Oh, yeah. Amanda would die for us. She almost did. She fell down the stairs. And I would do the same for her.

As would I. Yeah. Now, another thing we need to follow up on is our little mission to voice message celebrities every week until they reply. Yes. I chose Kerri-Ann as the celebrity, so-called celebrity, that I would message relentlessly until she replies. I chose Paddy Newton to message relentlessly until she replies.

Did you get a reply? Let's check in. Oh my God. I'll go first. I'll go first. Right. So yes or no question. How could you possibly drag this out?

I'm going to check. P-A-T-T, Paddy Newton official message. I got nothing. Yeah, neither. Nothing from Kerri- Did they at least see it? No, nothing. So now we have to send another one, correct?

Yeah, we may as well. All right. What can we do to make this one stand out from the others? Oh, wait, I've got something. I've got something. It just hit me. I think she'll love it. I've got something. It just hit me. I think she'll love it. She'll love it.

Just creative. I'm recording. Patty cake. Patty cake. One, two, three. Patty, come on my show with me. Hello, Patty. It's Mitch Turi.

I would just love to get you on my podcast as a guest. I thought I'd do a little cheeky spin and sing you a song. You are a Showtime legend, so we'd love to have you on the podcast to banter with us anyway love you Paddy talk soon sent done 20 seconds on the knocker

that was weird Paddy you're a stranger to me it hit me Paddy Paddy Cake what can you do for Kerry do I have to do a song

I don't know if I can do a song I don't know sing a song no Kerry song maybe sing about her being a reptile or something no I don't want to insult her I'll never get a song. I don't know if I can do a song. I don't know. Sing a song. A Kerry song. Yeah, maybe sing about her being a reptile or something. No, I don't want to insult her. I'll never get a reply that way. True, true.

Is that insulting to Patty? Should I delete that? No. No, it's funny. It's just very fucking odd. That's all. The come on bit I thought was going in a completely different direction. No, no, no, no, no.

Okay. Maybe just compliment Kerry. What if I do it rather than singing? I'll just do it In like an indie singer voice I'll be like Kerry Iron Oh yeah yeah yeah Yes

Perfect Like a triple J song Yeah great Oh my gosh Alright Oh I don't even know what I'm going to say Kerry Iron Hi Kerry Iron

I just said I'd circle by See how you been How's life Love you Yeah no There's no way I'm getting a reply bike. See how you've been. How's life? Love you, Ori. Yeah, no, there's no way I'm getting a reply. She can tell that's a piss take. Is it too? No. No, send it.

Oh, I should unsend it? No, leave it. You have to leave it. I feel like I've blown my chances of getting a reply there. Now, do you think they'd get notifications? This would go to their others folder, wouldn't it? It'd go to their message request, probably, if they don't follow you, which they don't. Well, let's see what we get next week. And now that we have a drug smugger update as well, I believe. Well, do we?

That's my question, because at the end of last week's episode, we were about to wrap up, and then as often tends to happen, our minds wandered, and we started talking about the fact that Chappelle Corby follows me on Instagram. Yep. And then we were like, right, I'm going to message Chappelle Corby. You message Cassie Sainsbury. Cocaine Cassie. Yes, Cocaine Cassie. In terms of rankings of Australia's most iconic alleged drug smugglers,

they'd be the top two. 100%. Oh, definitely. And Andrew O'Keefe, a close third. He's a drug smuggler. No, he had weed on him when they arrested him. And an ice pipe. And an ice pipe.

That's not smuggling, though. He didn't try and take it to an airport. True. He smuggled it in the Channel 7 van or something. Oh, well, I take that back. He's in the top three. He's in the top five. He's in the top five.

Okay, well, I'll go first. So Cassie Sainsbury, did she get back to you? All right, I have an update. I've got half a point because Cassie followed me back on TikTok. She followed me too. Oh, did she? Because I wasn't even the one trying to contact her. Cassie followed me and I did remember I commented on a video saying, Cassie, please follow me

back now because I messaged you. Well, I messaged her and I said, hello, Cassie, big fan of your work, which I guess is drug smuggling. So I guess I just complimented her. Top job on that one, Cass. Yeah, you did real well. Actually, you bungled that up. You went to prison for a year.

A year, is that all? No, I think she spent more. How did she get out? I thought she was there for life. She was, and then all of a sudden she was out. Can you recall how long she was in care of a can? That was my girl. That was your smuggler. Anyway,

I said, we love you, and to throw in this, I said, me and my co-host love how open you are with your partner, because you're not gay. Nice. Then she didn't reply so oh really show us do you reckon she does it tell you on instagram um tiktok if it's red no no it doesn't it doesn't where was cut where was the cocaine on her body i don't know it was your telling the story bro luggage it was in a luggage all right so if i get any samsonite ads i'll send them her way i can't remember off the top of my head,

but I don't think it was just a little bit of cocaine. It was quite a hefty dose. Well, to get the nickname Cocaine Cassie, you'd hope. So she smuggled 5.8 kilos in 18 separate packages of headphones. Oh, that's a perfect brand alignment for us. Oh, what brand of headphones? Yeah. Right.

Sennheiser Bose. Are you going to send a bump? Yeah, I'll send a bump now. Can you send a voice message? That'd be good, wouldn't it headphones? Yeah. Right. Sennheiser Bose. Are you going to send a bump? Yeah, I'll send a bump now. Can you send a voice message? That'd be good, wouldn't it? I don't know. I don't really use TikTok DMs much. No.

Here, I'll do voice to text. Hey, Cassie, comma, just checking in, queen, exclamation point. We love what you do, exclamation point. Next week would work for recording time if that suits you and you're not busy in prison full stop, thanks Mitch perfect decoded well you put accordion instead of accordion

but that's fine, I can fix that after I never use voice to text the only time I ever use voice to text is when I don't know how to spell a word and like autocorrect is not helping me out so my housemate just hears me in my bedroom just mid-sentence be like, Crescent them, and then spells the word for me. Similarly.

How the fuck do you spell that? Similarly. True. Now, my drug smuggler, alleged, alleged, alleged, who, as you know. Oh, shit, sorry, it's Emi Mealy. Emi? It's Emi Mealy, the artist. Who?

The girl. She sings that hot song. Oh, you've double booked yourself another radio interview, have you? Yes. Right. Who's Emi Mealy? You know Emi Mealy the artist. Who? The girl. She sings that hot song. Oh, you've double booked yourself another radio interview, have you? Yes. Right. Who's Amy Mealy? You know Amy Mealy? No.

Who's Amy Mealy? That's Jenna when she walks into the Jonesy and Amanda studio. With her puss out. 5am, Jonesy pulls up on his motorbike. Sorry, aren't you meant to be doing an interview right now? She can wait. He sees Jenna at her desk She's just there fanning herself It's the show love

Hair blowing in the wind And Jonesy's like We really can't be putting shit like this out there Oh my god Jonesy, we love you Yeah, do you want to sit through the interview? What do you want to do? Because it's in two minutes I can't be putting shit like this out there. Oh, my God. Jonesy, we love you. Yeah, do you want to sit through the interview? What do you want to do?

Because it's in two minutes. Well, no, my preference would be to cancel the bitch and we just keep talking. I can't cancel Amy Mealy. That song's hot. All right. We'll cut this out. Thank you so much for having me. It was great to meet you.

Yeah, you too. And you are killing it. Honest to God. So good to see it. Thank you. Good to see you. We'll talk soon. All. Yeah, you too. And you are killing it, honest to God. So good to see you. Thank you. Good to see you. We'll talk soon. All right.

Bye, Bron. Bye, guys. Bye, Emmy. Bye. All right, I'm done. I fake laughed for about 10 minutes. Now we're back. Oh, hold on.

Mic back on. Hello. Jenny, you back? Sorry. Hello. Where were we? Chappelle Corby. This show is all over the show. I love it.

Oh, yeah, Chappelle Corby. So nothing from Cassie Sainsbury as yet. Nothing from Cassie, no. Pinged her. But no need to ping Chappelle. She. This show is all over the shop. I love it. Oh, yeah, Chappelle Corby. So nothing from Cassie Sainsbury as yet. Nothing from Cassie, no. Pinged her, but no need to ping Chappelle. She got back to me. What? No. Because as you know, she already followed me on Instagram.

She's a fan. Yeah. And, yep, she got back to me. Oh, my God. So if you weren't listening last week, I messaged her first, inviting her on the show. This is what I said. Hi, Chappelle.

It's Mitchell here. I just wanted to let you know we were chatting on the podcast about people who follow us on Instagram and my big flex was that Chappelle Corby follows me. My co-hosts were so bitter, bitter with jealousy. You have no idea. So anyway, we just wanted to invite you on. If you ever want to come on for a chat, the airwaves are yours, Chappelle. A good sell, a good sell from you. It was very inviting, I thought. And not long after I left this building, she replied almost instantly. Didn't take her long to get back to me.

I'm sure she was so excited to get a message from me. This is what she said, okay? You ready for this? And a voice message too? Yep. I got a voice message from Chappelle. Here we go. Hello, Mitchell.

Yes, I do follow you. I think you're fabulous i i just love you and i love the fact that you're from like originally you're from a place called bogan and hey me and my sister we're the biggest bogans out um thank you for inviting me on for a chat but i will decline i don't think i'm the best speaker. So I won't embarrass myself any further than needed at the moment. But thank you so much, Mitchell. And hi to your co-hosts.

Oh, my God. I do see them through your Instagrams. So they're not forgotten. They're not not known. They are there. So cheers to you. happy Rosé Day. Oh, she's a man. There we go.

That was long. Oh, my God. So I got a reply from Chappelle. Holy shit. We're old pals now. And Jenna, she knows of us. I know. Doesn't know your names.

Couldn't kill us. You died. But, yeah, she's aware. She sounds like a high five actor. She does. I know. Doesn't know your names. Couldn't kill us. You died. She's aware. She sounds like a high five actor. She does. Hi, Jill. She's quite perky, isn't she? Very perky. Hello, Mitchell. Yes, I do follow you. I think you're fabulous.

I don't know what she means when she says she's not a great speaker and doesn't want to embarrass herself. I don't see anything bad about that. She's a great speaker. No, completely agreed. She came in for, I don't know if she had followed me on Instagram at this point, but when I still worked for Kyle and Jackie O, she came in for an interview. And it was very compelling. It was Chappelle-ing.

And I don't think she was a bad speaker. Granted, she was, you know, talking about the whole prison fiasco, so she was a bit emotional. She's a sweetheart. If you don't know who Chappelle Corby is, if you're an international listener we probably should have set this up she is lovely i think we made it quite clear when we said she's our most famous drug smuggler she smuggled quite a shit ton of marijuana into bali can you find the uh interview with kyle and jackie yeah okay i also i'm sure it's on youtube because i put it there so she smuggled marijuana in a boogie board she

was caught and she served i think 10 years in prison but they were going to kill her she had the death sentence i can't remember how many years she was there but it in a boogie board. She was caught and she served, I think, 10 years in prison, but they were going to kill her. She had the death sentence. I can't remember how many years she was there, but it was a long time, yeah. Oh, yeah. I think maybe 20 years. Sam, can you check? Sorry to... Yeah.

Would it kill us to do our own research prior? Nah. No, no. Out of my mind, like, literally for about four years. Catatonic. Really? Because you, to me, right, this is the first time we... I couldn't even...

I couldn't speak. People would have to massage my feet and my hands because that cramp I was in such a hell in my mind. And it's just really hard. Sorry, I'm going to cry. Mental illness is real. And a lot of people accused me of faking this. Oh, Chappelle.

And a lot of people accused me of faking this. Oh, Chappelle. And look, if I could have lived without mental illness, oh, God, my mind would be so much better. My life would be better. Mercedes wouldn't have had to go through what she had to go through. That's her sister, Mercedes. She'd actually sleep in prison a couple of times with me because I just could not.

She couldn't shower, couldn't eat. I couldn't. I was catatonic. This was her first interview since she left prison, right? Yeah, the very first one. I was a psychologist. You had both. Yeah, so even when she was super emotional, she wasn't a bad speaker.

No, she's a great speaker. Whatever, I can cop it a rejection. I'll take the hint. And you know what? I think I'm proud of you as well for talking about your growing up and your childhood in Bogan. Look, you know, she's clearly not a diehard, is she? No.

You come from a town called Bogan. She's not a diehard. No. All right, well, give me another criminal to DM. Come on. They would have had to have been released from prison. Yeah. Okay, who do we have?

Matthew Newton. Oh, Matthew Newton. Oh, my God. Imagine if we just hit all the Newton family. Yes. Obviously, Bert. Yeah, can't message Bert if we just hit all the Newton family. Obviously, Bert. Yeah, can't message Bert. He won't get back to us. I'll get a Luigi board.

Yeah. Can we please try and... We've got to get John Edward or some psychic on to try and cross over to Bert Newton and say, Hey, mate, can you ask Patty to reply to us on Instagram? Imagine if that's how we get to her. Oh, imagine. All right. Well, is that us done?

Goodness me, we've got to tie our criminal arc in a nice little bow. Yeah. It's a no from Chappelle, so we're back to the drawing board. But, hey, we do have some guests coming on next week. We do. Yes, you remember my old podcast, my cup of tea. I do after it was cancelled by the podcast commission. The podcast commission?

It's like the Wizarding of Magic. What's it called? Ministry of Magic. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They came down hard on you. My old podcast that makes you seethingly jealous. No, it doesn't. A lot of our listeners come from that podcast.

Oh, two of them. All two of them. But anyway, our good friend Talisha Vescio, who I used to do Notoma Covered Tea with, she's got a new podcast with our mate Oscar. So they're going to be both coming in here next week. Lovely. A bit of a crossover with Party Games Podcast.

That's what they've called it. You know what? Can I challenge him to bring something to the table on the show? You can do what you like. Oscar, if you're getting this audio, I'd like to get a jingle written for Is It Just Me, the podcast. Right. It doesn't have to be a full song, just a jingle.

Well, I don't know if he listens, to be honest. As much as we're here supporting their podcast, Party Games Podcast is what it's called. Well, you know what? Don't know if he listens, so he might not get that message. You can just put him on the spot next week. I agree. Yeah, that's good. If I can do it, he can do it.

He can riff it. Yeah, that's right. All right, we'll have them next week. That's very exciting. I love that show. That's really cool. Otherwise, we're going to get out of here, guys, for episode 96. Yep, 96 done and dusted.

Don't forget to head to our merch store if you want to have a look at what we've got on offer. Yep, it's all available now to buy exclusively. The new merch is yours. Get your pre-orders in before the end of February. That's right. If you're listening in the future, tough tits. Get your pop sockets and pop them out. That's like Jenna pops that pussy when she enters WSFM.

Oh, my God. We will see you next week. Please leave us a review as well. Five stars keeps us going. We'd love that. You can do it now on Spotify. I did it on the weekend. Yeah, what do we want them to leave on Spotify, Bradley?

What was it again? Ratings. Yes. That's the one. Five stars. Ratings. Yep, they now do five stars. Ratings.

So if you want to leave one on Spotify, please do. And tap the notification bell so you get a notification every time there's a new episode on Spotify. I've just got the Spotify education down pat now. Leave us a review. Type, type, type, type. On Apple. What else do you do? What other apps are there?

We leave. That's what we do. Goodbye everyone. See you next week. Thank you for listening. Bye. Is it just me? wrap this up alright goodbye everyone see you next week thank you for listening love you all bye see ya is it just me a podcast by a couple of mitches

make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app Welcome to ADD Brief. This is our secret segment on the end. We pretend we're done and then let our ADD go wild. We pretend we're done, then pot twist, we're not. We're not. No. We're not.

Nothing planned in this bit. We just, yeah, talk shit. When are you going to get an official ADHD diagnosis, do you think? Me? Yeah. I've asked my doctor. They claim I don't need it. I think you need a second opinion.

You're the most ADD person I know. I don't think so. That's why we come alive in this secret segment. I just think I'm extremely, extremely talented. Yeah, I think you need a second opinion. You don't have to be one or the other. You don't have to make a choice. Good point. No, I asked my doctor. I am both. Yeah, I think you need a second opinion. You don't have to be one or the other. You don't have to make a choice. Good point.

No, I asked my doctor. I am both. Yes, you are. I asked my doctor and he said his professional opinion, he doesn't think I need to be checked. I could fake it. No, don't. No, I don't.

I could fake it. No, don't fake it. I might fake it. No. Might. No. Okay, I won't fake it. Did you hear that Jonesy has stolen our idea

and he's taking Jenna for a driving lesson? Bullshit. Did you get a one-on-one? Ah. It's happening. Jenna, if you get in that car, he turns the radio on and you hear. Run. Jonesy, why is the seat wet?

Oh, yuck. Oh, my God. We can't run with this joke. It's so inappropriate. Jonesy, I thought you drove an automatic. Why is there a big gear stick in your pants? That's what you get for bagging the branding of our show, Jonesy. Jonesy means make wild and faceless rumours about you.

Poor Jonesy. He has been happily married to his beautiful wife. He's got his daughter, a thandriller. A Romany. Romany. Close. Where did you get a thandriller. A Romany. Romany. Close. Where did you get a thandriller from? And he's a lovely household man, and I take out all my negativity.

It's all a joke. All in good, all fun. He worked with Amanda Keller. He gets a joke. They really fucked our branding, though, didn't they? Yeah, thanks for that, Jonesy. Is it just me with a couple of Mitches? With Jenna?

No. It's just our Instagram handle, couple of Mitches? Because that's more fun. Exactly right. Then is it just me podcast, one word. That's a lot. Probably already taken too. We should do an update on, you know how we listen to the other

is it just me podcast? Yes. Very popular podcast name. I reckon it's been about a year since we last listened to the others. So there's probably more now. When you got your appendix out. Oh, that's right. We were in my bed. Yes. That was around, that was like a couple of weeks before M your appendix out. Oh, that's right. We were in my bed.

Yes. That was around, that was like a couple of weeks before Mardi Gras, so yeah, you're right. What a mess. Yeah, I've searched, is it just me? We can do it later, but I just want to see if there's any on the surface. Oh, yeah. Oh.

Oh, my gosh. Do they look unfamiliar to you? There's new ones? Unfamiliar to me. And then we're obviously the top number one, is it just me? We weren't when we started. We've climbed to the top. Is it just me with Jo Elvin, who is a friend of the show.

She's been number two. She's now number three. We have a new second top, Is It Just Me? Who the hell's that? It's Is It Just Me, a podcast by May Dang. No, I don't think we have played that, but I could be wrong. I don't actually know if you're right in saying that when you search us, we come up as number one.

I think the search result is tailored to, like, your browsing history. Because you know how you said that that other chick, the, what is that? Is It Just Me by May Dang? Yes, May Dang. You said that that comes up second. It doesn't on mine. What? No, it doesn't on mine either.

I mean, ours obviously comes up first. But I reckon the order is different depending on, so like if a total stranger that's never heard of this podcast were to search it, I reckon we might not come up first, but I reckon the order is different depending on... So, like, if a total stranger that's never heard of this podcast were to search it, I reckon we might not come up first. No, we'd have the most listens. Of course it would. Obviously! If it's a game of most listeners, we'd be out by a bloody mile. Yeah, well, they're not searching the Stock Exchange. We'd be at the top

of that if you were to search Is It Just Me. Have you seen that guy, Alex Frost, that was on Survivor? No. Sam Frost's brother. Oh, yeah, Sam Frost. Oh, well, no, I didn't. Have I told you the story? He was in my class at the radio school. Get out.

Really? Yeah. Oh. Sam Frost, the bachelorette turned home and away star. Sam Frost's younger brother? Yes, Alex Frost. Absolutely gorgeous, by the way. Oh, good.

I did a YouTube video with him on my YouTube channel. It was like taking straight guys gay clubbing. Ah. Oh, was that him? Yeah. Oh, he's quite the looker. Yeah. But here's the thing.

So he was in my class at the Australian Film Television Radio School. Yeah. And we were obviously in the radio class and we started talking about, like, it was one of our first days and they said to us, right, so who do you think does a good job at radio and who do you think does a bad job at radio? Yeah, oh, no. And at the time, his darling sister Sam Frost was on air at Today FM. Oh, the breakfast show with Roe and Sam.

The Roe and Sam show. Yeah. The Roe and Sam show. No. And not knowing that her blood relative was in the room, I bagged the absolute fuck out of Roe and Sam. Oh. And the teacher would just give me this look in her eyes like,

shut up. If I were you, I'd shut your dog mouth. Because I was just like, they don't know what they're doing. They don't even listen to each other. Their banter is so shit. They just sound so amateur. And I was just hurling all the insults. And then I'm pretty sure at one stage I said, especially Sam.

She's so out of her depth. I feel bad for her. She accepted this job for clout but has no idea what she's doing and then eventually, a few weeks later, I found out that it was Sam Frost's brother in the class. If anyone of her family actually loved her, they would put her out of her misery and tell her that

she has the talent of an armadillo. I'd be embarrassed to be related to that mole. Imagine turning up to whatever education you have every day knowing that your sister is that bitch. There he was. And then he gave me a lip tone from class once. Oh. And that was when Rove and Sam were on air at night time at TodayFM

and Rove and Sam were on. I was like, oh, your sister's on. I love that show. I was hoping to erase the memory of everything I said prior. Love them. They're so good, Alex. I was hoping to erase the memory of everything I said prior. Love them. They're so good, Alex. She was listening to his sister in the car? Well, his radio was on today, FM.

Yeah, okay. And they were on air at that time. I mean, no one listens to night radio on purpose. It's just by accident. It's my bread and butter. I never got that expression. It's my bread and butter. I don't even buy bread or butter. What's a modern day saying if it's my bread and butter. I don't even buy bread or butter.

What's a modern day saying if it's my bread and butter? Probably ties in with the whole bread winner thing. Like, it's just what you do for money or whatever. What are the two most shopped items you buy? Limes and toilet paper. So you could go, oh, yeah, it's my limes and toilet paper. Janice would be, it's my chain mail and arsenic. Yep.

And bleach. That's it. Mine would be. It's my redheads and arsenic. Yep. And bleach. That's it. It's my redheads and kerosene. Yes. Of course. It's my hummus and Chobani yogurt on the go pack. I love those. I'll say.

They're great. Have you had the high protein one? They're so good. The problem is you can't hold on to them for too long because you know when you eat it and the top's cold, but then you get to the part that you've been holding and it's warm because your hand has warmed it up. I hate that. I never take my time with those things. I just like suck it off then and there.

Goodness me. Quite partial to a quickie. I bet you can guess what flavour I picked too. Oh! What? Banana. That wasn't meant to be the innuendo. Oh, can I tell you something nuts?

I'm going to play you a TikTok that I saw that I thought of you straight away. I think I sent it to you. Did you? Yeah. And I can't find it. You know the reason banana flavouring, like banana essence or banana vape. Banana Nesquik. Yes.

You know what? I can get around banana Nesquik. The reason why banana essence tastes nothing like real banana, because it really doesn't. It doesn't taste like an actual banana. It tastes different. Yeah. It's like watermelon flavour doesn't taste like watermelon.

Exactly, exactly. But the reason the banana is just like that is because there was a banana plague, like, in the 60s. So they were so worried they were going to lose actual banana that they had to create their own fake banana, and that is why it tastes fake so banana flavoring is like the wish version yes of bananas they tried to create it and just did not nail it yes at all and that's just what has caught on people got so used and accustomed to the banana essence flavor that they've kept it but it is not actual banana i personally think that it's better

the banana flavoring even though i'm quite passionate to bananas as of last week i agree actually i've been having them for breakfast I like bananas I put bananas on my cereal every morning I love it really yeah

it's really good because I add bananas and two fruits to my cereal have you seen that TikTok that comedian Mel Buttle you know how she hosts I love Mel Buttle she's great

she hosts Great Australian Bake Off of course and her whole thing on TikTok at the moment is just making fun of mums yeah I've seen it. And the TikTok just says, mum wants you to eat a banana.

Oh, what is it? Play it. Is it playing? Oh, no, I've got to turn it on. Sorry. It's on now. Yeah, by the way, guys, we invested in a new cord where we can plug our phones in. Yeah.

Very exciting. So we're just going to play our shit off our phones the whole time. All right, here it is. That's what we're having for tea. And if you're still hungry afterwards, have a banana. Dinner will be at least 45 minutes. I have just put it in the oven. If you are hungry, why don't you have a banana to tide yourself over?

There's plenty of bananas. Feeling a bit off. Hmm. What have I got? I could do, how about a banana? Just something light just to get in your tummy, yeah? Every mum ever. I know.

Between that TikTok and your jingle, I was like, fuck it, I'm buying bananas. You were hooked. This is the TikTok about the essence if we've moved on, but plug my cord in. Here we go, you can hear mine. Have you ever wondered why banana flavouring and candy or medicine tastes nothing like an actual banana? I have! This blew my mind when I found out.

So in the 1800s, when bananas were first being introduced to America, one became super popular called the Gros Michel. And that's because it made a ton of fruit and was easy to ship all around the world. And that is what artificial banana flavor was based off of. But the problem was, decades later, in the 1950s, a fungal disease basically destroyed that entire species. And so as a result, this guy, the Cavendish, became popular because it was resistant to that fungal disease.

Not as impressive as my story. You get the point. Yeah. Wonder how many times we've used the word banana in this episode. A lot of banana chat. Count it up. Sam, can you go back in time and look at every reference we made about bananas? How'd you go with the library, Sam?

Yeah, no, apparently the libraries aren't a thing in COVID times. Oh, yeah, that's true. I tried to print something. That's why I bought a printer. Oh, yeah, we were all at Mitch's house a couple of weeks ago, and you have a printer. And I said to Hayden, we need a printer. He goes, why?

I went, because Mitch has one. Yeah, but you can just print shit at work that's why i had to get one because i don't i'm pretty sure in the early days of this podcast we did a whole thing about how no one buys printers anymore who the fuck would get a printer loser turns out i need them more frequently than i thought because i used to just print shit at work actually thank you for reminding me i need to print out my asos return label yeah good shit like that that's what i need a printer for. Did you know that – you know how when you return something at ASOS, you've got to drop it back to the post office?

Do you know reception here can do it for you? Really? Yeah. You just give it to reception and they lodge it. Oh, shit. Well, that information's helpful to no one except you three, just so you know. Imagine all these listeners of ours coming to the Kiss FM studios as their passing point collection.

I got sent a package today. It's called the Personal Print. They do custom iPhone cases. They're sponsoring my radio show. And they sent me a package today. It was a small box. I went, oh, this is mine. And then the receptionist went, oh, do you want to take this to Jenna?

And I said, oh, Jenna got a package. Yeah, she did. Gigantic. I opened the box of it to have a look. It's a giant four litre keg of whiskey fireball. Yeah, shitload of fireball shots. What's the go, Jenna? Five kilos.

Five kilos of cinnamon whiskey. Sharing is caring. Sorry, where is that in the middle? Yeah, Jenna. I didn't ask for it. Why did they send it to you, Jenna? Because I wrote about it. And they sent it to you to say thank you?

Yes. And it's worth $250. Wow. That really is how the world works. She just puts any old fucking article on WSFM and then hopes that they send her free shit. It's like the new Mercedes. The new BMW. Yeah, he may come off the back of my show.

Actually, why the fuck would she want those cars? She doesn't drive. Doesn't drive. As we've established. Yes, but I will. I'm going to book a driving test. Jenna, it's all lies. It's not a lie. I will show you. No, it I will. I'm going to book a driving test. Jenna, it's all lies. It's not a lie. I will show you.

I'd be interested to know who's the better driving instructor, me or Brendan Jonesy-Jones. I'll update you. I can tell you which one of us isn't going to try and interfere with you while you're driving. We need to ditch that joke. We need to stop that joke. We need to stop. I think it's over for that. We can't do anymore. that joke. We need to stop that joke. We need to stop.

I think it's over for that. We can't do anymore. Yeah, and no one in our Facebook group, don't get smart about jokes about Jonesy being a predator towards Jenna. Or her trying to lull him. He never made jokes about him being a predator. He's just horny for Jenna. That's natural. Jenna is of age. If anything, she's too old to be hit on.

She's an eternal flame. Yeah, you're right. He's a human. Yes. Another thing I'm too old to do. Jonesy. She's an eternal flame Yeah you're right He's an inhuman Yes Yes Another thing I'm too old to do Even Sam says Jonesy What were you talking about? That's disgusting Jenna

Alright let's go guys What an episode it's been Yeah Yeah We hope this podcast Made you feel at least Two percent better today So we do

Yep that's right So we do So we do Do we like that? Are we sticking with that? I like it Yeah it's nice I forgot you were doing it So it took sticking with that? I like it. Yeah, it's nice. I forgot you were doing it, so it took me by surprise.

No, I reckon it should be like a prayer, you know, in church. He says, the Lord is with you and everyone repeats. Got it. And also with you. I'll say, we hope this podcast makes you feel at least 2% better today. That's all. So we do. So we do.

Sam? In sync. Say it again. Say it again. Say it again. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today. That's all. So we do. Oh, I liked that.

A bit cultish. Imagine new listeners hearing that for the first time. And shit themselves. So we do. What have we entered into? These people are nuts! I'm happy. Let's roll. Hope this podcast makes you feel 2% better, everyone. There we do.

Oh, we didn't get to say it together. We already did that. We've done it. I want to do it again. That'll be the fourth time, Jenna. Are you sure? Yes. I need an even number.

You try it. You try it. Guys, we hope this podcast makes you feel at least 2%. No, that's my line. Oh, yeah, you're right. God. Going off script again. So we do.

It's the ADD. Tell them. Let's get Dr. Saad on my line. Who? My GP. Dr. Saad. Dr. Saad on the line. Who? My GP. Dr. Saad? Dr. Saad. Dr. Wondersoap? Dr. Hevipure? Are you sad to get rid of the Sands on my... Dr. Hevipure.

Dr. Dove. Dr. Dove? I'd buy that. Dr. Aesop. We hope this podcast made you feel at least 2% better today. That's all. Amen.

No, we don't. It's got lest we forget energy. It really does. Lest we forget. That's a valid point. Lest we. Lest I regret. You know what lest means?

What? So we don't. Oh. So, like, we better wrap this podcast up lest you be late for work. True. Yeah. I'm so good guestful at the moment. Me?

Lestful. I didn't get that. Forgetful. Oh. No, that's not it. It's lest means, like, hoping that something doesn't happen. Oh, right, right. Oh, I better not eat that fourth Big Mac lest I have a heart attack.

Got it, got it. Yeah, that's more pertinent to me. Yeah. Yeah, okay. That fits in. That fits in. All right. Oh, if you have a Guardian this week, copy The Guardian.

I feature in The Guardian everyone this week and I give our podcast a real handy plug. Did you? Yes. Yes, I wrote a piece for The Guardian and guess what? They said no edits. They were very shocked. They thought I was illiterate and dumb. He was like, I'm shocked there were no edits. They were very shocked. They thought I was illiterate and dumb.

He was like, I'm shocked there were no edits. I said, really? Even grammatical ones. I hope you read it back and it's just not at all what you wrote. Not what I did! Just this think piece on ScoMo's prime ministership. I didn't write this. So you actually wrote the whole thing yourself? Yes, I did.

I had to write the top ten funniest things I've seen on the internet. Number one was supposed to be this podcast, but that was too self-indulgent and too pluggy. They told me to change it. Oh, that's bullshit. That's an edit. That's an edit. No, no, well, no.

Edits in my writing. And their content, you know, is different. How can they tell you what the number one funny thing that you've seen is? That's right. Well, it's meant to kind of be funny. No, don't buy The Guardian. We don't support that. Fake news.

They're controlling the news. Please buy The Guardian. We don't support that. Fake news. They're controlling the news. Please buy The Guardian. They're changing your opinion piece. Support me. Fuck that. Post a link. See you next week, guys. We'll catch you then.

Bye-bye. See ya. Love ya. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you hit follow on your podcast app.