Is It Just Me? - BEST OF: Impressions

Episode Date: January 1, 2023

Throwing back to some of our favourite bits from the podcast (so far!) This week, it's all the time we've been two-faced bitches and pretended to be someone we're not x   SEASON 5 COMING SOON!   Hit us up @coupleofmitches xxSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Oh, hello you. Hello, Mitchell. Hello you. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. HNY. Happy New Year. Merry Christmas. Christmas is over. We're dropping in a little mid-break drop in to say hello. How was your Christmas, Mitchell? Yeah, it was gorgeous, actually.

Can we just talk about where I'm currently broadcasting from? Well, I didn't know if you'd broken in, if we were allowed to talk about coming direct from, is it the Bogangate Baptist Church? It's the Anglican Church, I'll have you know. Anglican, oh, you're so sorry. The Wi-Fi is too shit at the farm to do this remote recording thing, so I stole mum's keys. She's on the cleaning roster for the local church, so I stole her keys. I've come in here where there's good reception and good air con, so we're good to go.

Oh my God, guys, there's like an orange hue. Is the sun setting, is the world ending in Bougainvillea or is that stained glass? It's got to be one of the three options. Yeah, it's like a beautiful yellow stained glass. So I look like I've got some sort of horrible liver infection. I wouldn't say gorgeous. You look like a jaundiced baby. Also, you kind of look like you've got that Trump fake tan, like the real orange around your face. This is hideous, but it's, you know, you've got to get what you can get in Bogengate. It's just the light of my Lord and Saviour. Of course. He's shining down upon us. He does love us. He's said it before. He's a listener.

I've read his review. You're there with Sean. Quickly, tell me, how is Sean, the new boyfriend, how has he liked Bogengate for the first time? Oh, he's actually come to church with me. We've got to repent. He's here if you want to have a chat. Yes, get out of the confessional booth. Hi, Sean. Come over here, Sean, please. Come in.

Cherry wants to know how you're enjoying Bogengate. Hey, Mitch. It's good. The farm's lovely. The family are gorgeous. Having a great time. What about the town itself, Bogengate? Oh, I was going to politely not say anything about it.

When we first drove through Bogengate, he said to me, this is confronting. So there you go. That tells you all you need to know. Got it. Well, let's be fair to Bogengate, he said to me, this is confronting. So there you go. That tells you all you need to know. Got it. Well, let's be fair to Bogengate and the Forbes area. They've just had floods, right? And they had fires like two years ago, whenever it was. It's been a rough couple of years. Yeah, it either doesn't rain at all or rains far too much.

So it's like really overgrown and full of weeds. It's not that pretty at the moment, but whatever. How was a Bogengate Christmas? Because you were there with Jane and Mark, and that would have been nice. No, I was with Sean's family for Christmas, remember? Oh, yes, sorry, but I'm all meaning Bogengate. You saw them, you know, around the – that weird five-day period that we're still in is technically, in my mind,

like the Christmas tree's still up, the decorations are there. It's extended Christmas. Was it good with the family? Yes, it's been gorgeous. And I will say this, anyone who listened to last week's Best Bits episode, we're doing five in total. This is the second. Last week's, do you remember, Mitch, we recorded alternate endings.

How was Christmas with Sean's family? Option A was I loved it. Option B was I hated it. Can confirm option A. It was gorgeous. Option A, Blake, did you actually think we had to pull the emergency option B? Did you have it ready to go? I left them both in just in case, cover my bases.

Now, listen, it's 2023 now, officially. Remember how we said that we're feeling way more optimistic about this year? Yes, I already am, yeah. So far, what are you vibing? Listen, I'm feeling good. I've got a lovely suntan. I've got nothing on the agenda. I'm feeling very relaxed.

I haven't had a haircut all year. And I'm feeling good. It's very early days, but I had to make that joke. How are you feeling? You feeling good? Yeah, good. Were there any daggy people in your life that made that joke? Oh, see you next year.

Oh, yeah, 100%. My uncle always does it right before. Like in the countdown, he'll send us a text. Yeah. It's like with all the gags in it, it's absolutely ridiculous. But you know what I think we should get rid of? Eat your mum on the fly. Is it just me or absolutely ridiculous. But you know what I think we should get rid of? Idium on the fly. Is it just me or should New Year's Eve texts be done with?

Like, guys, you don't need to send us a text wishing us a happy new year. Like, chains. I haven't gotten any, to be fair. Oh, really? No, I got a couple. Apart from marketing ones. No, not marketing. Anytime fitness.

Fuck, they won't take me off the roster. I can't unsubscribe anymore. But they don't listen to me. Yeah, like new year with like a little star emoji and make good health and merry tidings bring it's like no no i don't want that it's very msn messenger chain mail what's your feelings on the christmas letter oh like a like a christmas card i like not a card i'm talking a letter that like it'll be the cheery family Christmas letter. Your mum might write, this is what Mitch got up to. This is his achievements, et cetera, et cetera. And then they send that with every Christmas card so everyone gets like the family update.

It's like a report card for the year. What if you didn't have much going on? Good bowel movement last month for Uncle Greg. And the pus was lanced from his ingrown toenail in September. He's feeling much more sprightly. Now, that's not for me. But I will say when I have kids, I want to do the dorky Christmas sweater, family photo, dog and everything and send that out.

More to be stupid than anything. I feel like the Christmas letter is kind of cute because it's kind of like if you keep a copy yourself, you can look back over the years and read your own Christmas letter. But they always just include the good shit. Mine would just be, yeah, I had 49 shocking hangovers in two months. I would include the shit stuff. Oh, why don't we do a realistic one? You know, like had shocking diarrhea that lasted a month. Really hated work. Fought with my partner this week. Truly a terrible year. Merry Christmas. I wouldmas i would love that well no that's not

our attitude for the new year remember no our attitude for the new year we're feeling hopeful we're feeling good it may be early but we thought this is a nice little kickstarter into the new year you don't have any brand new episodes you're getting these little mini best bits just to sort of have a trip down memory lane because we've got a lot of new listeners and we have a lot of ogs that may have forgotten these moments so this is what these little mini episodes are, right? Yeah, there's going to be five of them. And like I said, this is the second. And this week's theme is impressions.

Apparently, we've done quite a few over the years. We've dug through the archives. This is not just a season four Best Bits series. Firstly, let's kick it off. Do you remember in episode 77 when we put my Ida Buttrose impression to good use? Oh, my God. This is when we prank called the new host of the project. Is that right?

Yes, that's right. Sarah Harris. She's now hosting the project as of this year. At the time, she was on Studio 10 and she was Ida Buttrose's former colleague. Ida had left at the time, but I decided as Ida to give Sarah a phone call and wish her happy birthday and see if she would realise that it's not really Ida. Hello, Sarah speaking. How do you do, Sarah?

It's Ida Buttruth calling. Oh, hi Sarah. How are you, lovely? I'm well. I believe that I have a belated birthday wish. Happy 40th. Oh, thank you, darling. Thank you.

Yeah, it was a bit strange in lockdown, but they made a big deal of me, a big fuss on the show, which was kind. How wonderful. Yes, I've been meaning to phone sooner, but, you know, busy running the ABC and whatnot. Yes, I hope you have a fabulous birthday. I did see that they treated you well on the show. Have you been having Zoom calls with loved

ones and stuff? You must be lonely. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. Hang on. This is a nighter, is it? Oh, shit. She's on to me, Mitch. That was quicker than I thought. Hello, Sarah. Hi, Sarah. It's Mitch and Mitch. I would never say stuff. Oh, my God. That's exactly

what I thought. I was trying to be eloquent like Ida. Fuck. Holy heck. god, that's exactly what I thought. I was trying to be eloquent like Ida, fuck. Holy heck. Oh my god, you're so good. Well, thank you very much. Oh. You're really, really, who is this? It's Mitch Coombs doing the Ida impression right now. Hello, I'm Ida Buttruth.

I don't do an Ida, I just do a good Bo Ryan. Oh, it's giving you Bo Ryan. Oh, yeah, and then come on. How are you? Let me tell you, Cronulla, yeah. And then come on. How are you? Yeah. Oh, let me tell you. Cronulla is California. It's a new California.

It's the place to live. It's great for families. It's awesome. It's awesome. How you doing, man? Awesome. An amazing race. You guys are the best.

Hey, Sarah, you're like me. You had to have your frigging birthday during COVID lockdown, huh? I know. I know. But you know what? Like, I don't really get out much anyway. So it's kind of like my regular life. Yeah. And I got to have this fun show, a fun day on the show.

And then I got to be with my boys, which was just the best ever. So I've been eating birthday cake for dinner every night too. Yeah. Oh, that's the best part, I reckon. Hacking all those COVID kilos. Well, happy birthday. I cannot believe you got me. You know when it started to come undone,

when you went, I've been busy running the ABC. She wouldn't say that. She wouldn't say what? She wouldn't say, well, I've been busy running the ABC, darling. Oh, yeah, as if she needs to gloat. No, because you know. Oh, she does not explain her own self to anyone. I cannot believe how good you are though, Mitch.

Does she actually greet you by saying, well, how do you do, Sarah? She does. Oh my God. I just made that up. That's great. Wait, Mitch, do some more. Do some more Ida.

Do some more Ida. Do you know what I was going to do? I was going to say, hello, Sarah. It's me, Ida Buttroth, AO. If I had a fucking AO, I'd be introducing myself that way. Same. Or is it OA? OA, AO, Order of Australia, OA. Yeah, you're an AO, adults only. That's what you are. Yeah, that's me. Sorry, I'd be introducing myself that way. Same. Or is it OA? OA, Auto Australia, OA.

You're an AO, adults only. Yeah, that's me. Sorry, I meant OA. Fuck, I'm long gone. No chance of getting that. It's like I worked with her for, I think, five years. She was on the show for. And it's like working next to the queen.

Yeah. I can imagine, yeah. She's so poised, so elegant. She is whip smart and just across everything. She's got a heart of gold, Ida Buttrose. She does seem sweet. She's so adorable. Can you put in a good word so we can get her on this podcast? Oh, that's a good idea.

Yeah, I'll try. I mean, she's busy running the ABC and all, you know. I actually feel like Ida Buttrose is one of those people that I never want to meet because I just want to have this vision of her in my mind as being excellent and I don't want her to ever, like, hate me. Yeah. Honestly, I'd have to be the kind of the cheeky devil's advocate

that would go, oh, Ida, you know, have you ever farted, you know, in a busy room? And, you know, she's like, please, Sarah, I don't care. Yeah, she's very polite, isn't she? Mitch, did I ever tell you this story? a busy room. And, you know, she's like, please, Sarah. She's very polite, isn't she? Mitch, did I ever tell you this story? I got Sarah. I got Sarah to record a voice memo reading out the Not My Cup of Tea reviews that we got.

And she was doing like a newsreader voice, like, good morning, funny as fuck, this pair. And she just did it on her phone in the dressing room. And then Ida was like, must you swear like that sarah she overheard it was not impressed she actually gets it like do you remember i had to do a segment when i first started at the radio station kyle and jackie obel like you want to be here at kiss get a celebrity on the phone in 24 hours oh yeah that was a challenge it was a challenge they set to me, and I got Ida Buttrose on her home phone with you,

which is the most Ida thing ever to ring a 029 number. And they got her on the air, and they said, oh, you don't even know Mitch. This is just, you got this through a contact. And she went, no, I know Mitch. I've known him for years. In fact, he was my mentor. He's been to my house.

I had it. She made it up on the spot. But just to make me look good, she improvised. A queen. A queen. Do you know why she would have done that? She would have gone, I like his hustle. I'm going to back him. Yeah. Yeah. That's what she likes. Yeah. And she would have seen a little bit of I to Bartros in

you, Mitch, by doing that. Because it takes some guts, right? To call the I to Bartros and say, do you want to come on the radio? Good on you. All right. Well, we'll leave you to it, Sarah. Thank you so much for answering the phone today. It's been a pleasure speaking with you. Love you. See you.

Is it just me? All right. This next best bit, this one's a little bit more recent. Episode 106. And, Chiri, you're involved in this one. Yes. Yes. You teamed up with Carla from Bankststown who was our guest that week yep she was on celebrity apprentice we had her on she's a good friend of ours but you know she skyrocketed to fame 2022 was a good year for

carla um and it was also at the height of the election albo and scomo so we did um i was scomo i believe this was my impression um and car Carla was Carla. And of course, Carla is well known for those videos where she pretends to be the state premier's PR, or what is it? Assistant? Yeah, yeah. A receptionist, isn't it? They're receptionists, yes. And so that's what this was. You were ScoMo, Carla was the receptionist

telling him, sorry mate, you lost the election. Yes, alright, here it is. Ring, ring, ring, ring. Jenny? Jenny, where's the phone? Ring, ring. That. All right, here it is. Ring, ring. Ring, ring. Jenny. Jenny, where's the phone? Ring, ring. That's the Bible. Ring, ring.

That's the Bible. Ring, ring. No, don't. Put it down softly. Sorry. Ring, ring. Here it is. Hello.

Oh, Carla. How are you, darling? Yes, Gomo. What's going on, Bart? I'm good, thank you. Carla? Listen, Bart, I've got some bad news. I don't know why you're... I'm holding the phone. Yeah, sorry, sorry. Listen, Bart, I've got some... Jenny. I don't know why you're holding the phone.

Sorry. Jenny, how's the curry? Stir it. Can you listen to me, bro? ScoMo, you never listen to me. Sorry, car. It's election night. We're just watching the results. I know. I've got the best news in the whole wide world to share with you. Oh my god, you stopped the boats again. Jesus Christ, bro. No. Who do you think you are?

No, the best news. Jesus Christ is here. No. Jennyny it's happened finally um so i just wanted to let you know that you did not win the election so hold on sorry oh that that can't be possible it's i'm being dead set serious bro no no but we had the christian vote no. We stopped the votes. I've told you this so many times. We stopped the votes. Nobody likes you. We stopped the gays.

You didn't. We got protesting. No. I completely fumbled the Vax rollout. Exactly. By making young people dip into their super, which will completely inflate the market. Exactly. And have them no money to retire on when they hit 60s.

How could I possibly have lost the election? It's because you didn't let your wife peg you. I think that's why. But she did. We did it based on your recommendations. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry. You're going to have to find another job, bro. No worries. I've got a good in at Hillsong. I think I'll be fine. Say hi to Jenny

for me. Political! You should be like, I've been looking into some openings of some recruitment. Jenny, we lost. If you are looking for a openings, like some recruitment. Oh, Jenny, we lost. Yeah. If you are looking for a job, they're looking for a trolley person at Coles at Warringah Mall. That's beneath me.

It's not really. They're looking for a bathroom attendant at the Four Seasons Hotel in the city. Colin, no, I can't possibly. I stopped the boats. I won't be. Listen, with your expertise in fucking shit up, that's the best you're going to get.

Sorry. Actually, I do have one more here. Something that's, like, very, very up your alley. Yes. Oh, great. It's perfect. Religion. The McDonald's at Engadine needs a cleaner for the bathroom.

Carla, I told you that didn't happen. It did, bro. It did. It didn't happen. Don't lie. I've got the CCTV footage, bro. Now, I dropped a dirty chai and it got on my pleats and everyone thought that I pooed myself, but I didn't.

Bro, chai wasn't invented back then. What are you lying for? You got me, Kyle. End scene. Wow. Love it. I went very political. Sorry.

I hate ScoMo. I didn't realise you knew things. Honestly, guys, Scott Morrison is an awful, he's actually an awful person. Policy aside, that man is, for someone who claims to be such a religious nut, he doesn't claim to be a nut, but he just, I hate him. I hate him so much. I didn't notice. We've never discussed politics.

What I've noticed, he always has this fucking smirk on his face. It's always like, yeah, I'm better than you. No, you're not. You suck. The moment the nation should have turned on that man is when we had the horrific bushfires, worst we've ever had. Oh, my God. He went down the South Coast and he forced people into a handshake with him.

RMS firefighters, he grabbed their wrists, laid them in soot and shook and made it for a press photo. That's nuts. I thought that everyone did turn on him at that point, which is why I was so surprised because around this election time, I thought it would be more obvious that, yeah, no, there's no way he's getting in. But I'm like, oh, it actually seems kind of 50-50.

I really thought more people would have turned against him. Well, I was reading a great article that apparently in times of global stress, and we've got the war in Ukraine and then COVID, and the general public vote towards safety, someone they know. So they would vote towards ScoMo because they don't want change. It's already another thing to add on to the stress. But, no, he's fumbled the last four years. Did you see Tracey Grimshaw roast him last night? No.

Oh, it was great. She posted, there was a video on Instagram I saw of her literally listing, she's like, so you said that you are of the people and you've helped everybody, but you did this. And she literally listed for like a good two minutes. She had the receipt facts. She had the receipts. And then his response was, well, that's a very long list of allegations,

isn't it? I'm like, oh my God. Yeah, he does like to say that. He goes, that's a very serious allegation without saying whether it's true or not. He just said that serious. Literally, you went to fucking Hawaii, bro. Yeah.

You went to go see Moana while the country was fucking burning down, bro. Also, I'm sorry, but if you aren't queer and you vote for Scott Morrison, screw your fucking head in. That man abstained from a same-sex marriage. Put it aside. There were only three people in Australia who abstained. It was him, it was Tony Abbott, it was Bob Gatter. Maybe one idiot.

I know. Pauline Hanson. Pauline Hanson, yeah. And he's our Prime Minister. And how can we feel safe? Like, look what's happening in America. They're repealing Roe v. Wade, which is abortion rights. Same-sex marriage will be next.

And then in five years, we just copy the trends of America. It'll happen here if we have a conservative government, i.e. Scoma. Better bloody not. Angers me. Better bloody not. Carla, you're getting easy. Oh, mate.

I feel like I've had so many people say Carla you should run for Prime Minister They said that on Garland Ducky O The other day I fucking know shit about politics I fucking hate politics

That's why I just make shit up That's why mum always goes You should have been a politician Because you know They're ScoMo voters ScoMo is from my electorate So that is also where The deep seated hate comes from

I debated him When I was in high school Face to face I was school captain And he was the local member The member for What's the member For was school captain and he was the local member. What's the member for the boats? He claimed he stopped the boats.

Transport or immigration? And he came to my school and we debated it. And he just shut me down. He like negged me and went, oh, well, no, I think that's wrong. So I have a personal vendetta against him. But all my parents vote for Skymo. Have you told your parents not to vote for him? I have told them that I have begged them not to vote for me.

I'd rather you not vote than vote for Skarno. And mum goes, you should be a politician, Mitchell. Let's always are out. She just shuts it down. Anyway, sorry. That's my rant done for the day. Nah, you're alright. See you fucking later. Wouldn't want to be. Imagine being that man. Two daughters. Don't let the door hit you on the fucking way out.

Amen. Bye. Is it just me? The rude shocks of young adulthood. All right, this next one, we're going all the way back to episode 58. This is when you were doing an impression of Janae, the mother hen of TikTok. You know how she does those checking in videos? Yeah, and tell you what, she loves a kilo of cheese and bacon. In every recipe, she's like, you need four grams of bacon.

I'm like, you're making an English breakfast tea, babe. But okay, sure, go for it. She's either teaching you how to cook or just checking on your mental health. She's absolutely gorgeous. I'm hoping we get her on again in the new year. Yes. So we had her on and I thought I'd do my take at her famous checking in TikTok video, which if you haven't heard it, she sits there and she talks to the camera.

It's like a point of view video. And she addresses you listening to the TikTok. So this is actually one of her famous checking in videos. Oh, sweetheart. What are you doing awake? Can't sleep? I just made a cup of tea. Would you like one?

I'll tell you what. It doesn't matter whether you do or don't How about I'll make you one And then I'll set it over here And if you want it, you can have it This one's a chamomile one So you don't need any milk with it Okay, there you go darling I'll set it just here for you

So listen If you want to talk about it, I can listen. Or if you don't want to talk about it, we can just sit here together. So how about I'll let you decide what you'd like to do. Just know, whatever it is, that I love you very much and you're so special. Yeah, there we go. Aren't they just gorgeous? So you did your own impression of her in episode 58 and then she came on the podcast in episode 61

and we played her your impression to see what she thought. Yeah, if I know well, I was in full Jenna signature rainbow eyeshadow. That's another point. Just picture that, me in rainbow eyeshadow. I believe this is on our couple of minutes, just TikTok, if you want to go have a scroll back and look. But this is me as Jene checking in. I actually, a few weeks ago, got Mitch to attempt his own checking in video in TikTok school.

Would you like to hear how he did? I would love to. I want you to rate how he did trying to emulate your famous video. Okay, here it is. Roll it. Oh, hi, darling. I'm just pulverising the chicken for tea. Yeah, chicken Kievs again. I know you chugged last time on that bone,

so I won't give you the thigh this time. I see your nose is still bleeding. It's been 24 hours now, hon. You should get that cauterised. Yeah? You can talk that cauterised. Yeah? You can talk to me about anything. Yeah. Why don't you tell me?

I'm all ears. You are funny. You are a little comedian. All right. You scurry off. Hey, you want some chicken to take home to the orphanage? Take it. All right, babes.

Great to see you again. Ta. That was me pulverising the chicken, Kia. I gotta say, a lot less comforting than your videos, Jennifer. I can't. It's the chicken bone for me. I can't. So what did you bone for me. I can't. So what did you think?

Did he nail it or no? Dals, it was beautiful. Like, there was a lot of care. You know, you would take, like I said, the chicken bone. You were being cautious, particularly after the accident last time. Yes, of course. She choked. On the thigh.

Oh, Jen is my guess. She choked on the thigh. The nosebleed. The nosebleed's been 24 hours. Yeah, look, definitely need to get, you know, good advice. Yeah. You've definitely passed on good advice. Thank you.

But I think I can probably give you a few tips. Okay, well, we've got the new Red Roost Crunchy Fried Chicken. It is available now. You can order it. Have you tasted this before, Jennifer, the new Crunchy Fried Chicken? I have, and can I just say it is amazing. So I am definitely happy to take some more of this. Thank you. So in your checking in

videos obviously there's usually a cup of tea involved or some food so today the red rooster is going to be what you're feasting on sure I suppose you you shouldn't really talk with your mouth full should you how do you do it um do you do it before you eat or while you're eating just taking a bite yeah yeah maybe just just pick at it while I'm doing it yeah maybe maybe have a bite and then there'll be like a bite out of the chicken so everyone knows. Yeah. Okay, should we look into one of the studio cameras?

Oh, she's doing it. I've got a little tripod here. Oh, great. Do you want me to do it on here? Yeah, go, go, go. On her phone. All right. I'm so excited.

An in-the-flesh checking in video. This is so hard. I'm so excited. Oh, and I might film this point of view. Yeah. Good. Or should I film myself? Do you want the light on or nah?

Is it fine? Sure, darling. I always need a bit more light. Do you know that I've never actually filmed one of these in front of anyone before? Don't worry. We've just been idiots in front of you for the last 40 minutes. You don't know. So don't worry.

Do they take... Do you need more than one take or do you do it, nail it the first time? It depends. It depends. Sometimes I've taken a few other times. I'm like, you know what? That's actually kind of okay. We're not live on the cloud.

So, hey, the magic of podcasting. Oh, yeah. You'll get it your first go regardless. I've just popped the beauty light on. Should I record this way and have my reaction as if it's live? Yeah, sure. Do whatever you bloody want. Turn this music off.

It'll never be in the news. I would love for you to give me a bit of a topic to work with. Okay. What do you usually do in them? Well, it depends. Sometimes I'll be inspired by something someone said or commented and then I might use that. There's usually like a little nugget of wisdom in there.

I remember one that was beautiful was like, now don't make yourself broke trying to buy Christmas presents for other people. Just be present and love. Give love this year. And I'm like, that's lovely. There's always this little nugget of wisdom at the end. What about like, I don't feel comfortable eating one because I think I'm too fat, but I'm actually.

Oh, and you can say, babe, you eat what you want. You know, look at me. I'm eating fried chicken. Yes. Like I really, I really want one, but I'm actually Oh, and you can say, babe, you eat what you want, you know? Look at me, I'm eating fried chicken. Yes, all in moderation. I really want one, but I shouldn't. You know what, I'll put this in the lunchbox for the kids. I like that. Alright, I can work with that. I can work with that. Alright. Our mic's off. Yeah, I'd say

so. Action! Hello, darling. Have you had something to eat today? I've got some Red Rooster here. Have you tried that? Have you had something to eat today i've got some red rooster here have you tried that have you had that before i know sometimes we try to be careful for eating because fried foods and things like that and particularly like i've had you know i've had the gastric sleeve i try not to eat too much this stuff but you need to know that it's okay to treat yourself every now and then so we eat healthy most time but let's treat ourselves.

So I'm going to have some of this one. So tell me, what have you been up to this weekend? Did you find some me time? Yeah? That's good. Well, if you haven't, you've still got time. You've still got time to do something. So I want you to remember it's going to be a new week.

Make sure you find something to centre yourself so that you can start your Monday on the right note, okay? Make sure you have a good night's sleep. I love you. Oh, my God. That was lovely. There's not a dry eye in the house. I love that. Treat yourself. That was amazing. Oh, I God. That was lovely. There's not a dry eye in the house. I love that.

Treat yourself. That was amazing. I love that. And I'm sitting right behind the ring light, so I felt like that was all directed to me. She was staring into your soul. Staring right into my thyroid. Wow.

So are you actually going to post that to TikTok? I will, yeah. Great. So everyone, Jennay, go find her on TikTok. Four N's, three A's, and two Y's. Jennay. No, sorry. Jennay. Jennay. Jennay laughs like a box of crunchified chicken. Four N's, three A's and two Y's. Jenna. Jenna. No, sorry. Jenna.

Jenna. Jenna laughs like a box of crunchy fried chicken. This chicken's really good. Isn't it good? It's a bit cold from the air con, sorry. But it's beautiful. Should I do a checking in? Yeah.

With the Ebbs and the crunchy fried chicken. I just want to see your reaction. Once you try the Ebbs and see if you like it or not. I'm an Ebbs fan. All right. Have you decided what you're going to say or just making shit up? I'll make it. Perfect.

Never read anything. How do you normally start them, Jen? With a greeting. Hi, Jook. Hi, Dunnan. Hi, Dals. Okay. Hi, sweetheart.

All right. Oh, hi, Dals. How are you, babes? Yeah, Joe, help him up. Help him up on the counter. He can't walk after the truck yet. You saw it, Joe. Oh, baby, hi. I'm just having some Red Rooster crunchy fried chicken. It's leftover. It holds really well. Unlike you on the back of that truck, you really let go. You just sit there, no need to talk. I know it's hard after the fire. I've got my ebbs here. My world famous ebbs. Everything but bagel seasoning. I think I want to sprinkle it on this chick chick. Yeah, I think it'll give it a good crunch, don't you baby? Yeah. Alright, here we go. Oh, sorry, does that trigger from the gunfight in Afghanistan?

Don't mean to, darling. Let me give it a try. Mmm. Oh, those abs. Oh, that's delicious. Have a bite. No, no, no pressure. I'm not hurting.

I'm going to leave it there for you to try when you want. Now, there are poppy poppy seeds in there i know you have a severe anaphylaxis so maybe pick them out yeah about three thousand in every circuit you've got plenty of time not much else you can really do is there i want you to know that you're always welcome here no matter what you're right i'm gonna go do a shit bye sweet and sane oh my god we can't post that on you why not that's horrific but also i feel like instagram worthy place maybe not tiktok yeah you can tell that he's not um he's not really an influencer because you've got to keep TikToks under a minute, darling. You've rambled on too long. I'm not a TikToker.

Stop eating. People hate it when you eat on the podcast. It's my show, not yours. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. All right, this next one is one of our more controversial impressions. I first of all want to say that I don't think we're known for our impressions, but clearly we do quite a few of them.

And this one was inspired by the bros Boise podcasts of TikTok and of the world that emerged in 2022. They're called Alpha Podcasts, I believe. You know, those problematic straight men that just spew their putrid opinions. We did an impression of that sort of podcast and people, for some fucking reason, actually thought we were two problematic straight men. I know. I think it's a compliment to our ability that they believe that you and I –

I haven't even been to Nida, mate. What the fuck? You're in a hot pink T-shirt with two buttons done up. I've got four inches of cloth on my head and they're like, these two straight boys. It's like, no, no, we really are not. But it riled up the internet and this is Coombs and I as an alpha podcast. The one that almost got us cancelled.

Yeah, episode 105 this is from. Could have been our last, but thank God it wasn't. Enjoy. Right, so TikTok school. As you know, we like to just rip off other people's ideas. Sometimes I'll be scrolling and I think, oh, Cheery will nail that. I'm going to bring that up on the show, get his hot take. And for those at home who can't see this because it's a podcast,

Jenna is in a slutty teacher's outfit. She does it every time we do it and it's hot. It's hot. But today we're doing a bit of a social experiment, aren't we? Yes, we are. We wanted to put it out into the world and change the podcast up a little bit. Because you know those TikToks that you always see of straight men who host podcasts?

Mitchell had to just swallow his vomit there for a second because they are vile and they are rising in prominence. These boring straight men talking about women's issues. I know. It's like you just leave a couple of men alone with a microphone. No women in the room. Although often there is one. There's just some little pick-me girl. That's the worst part.

Just laughing along. And they'll say really uninformed, dumb shit. Misogynistic bullshit. And there's no one to call them out. Yeah, exactly. But there is like, there's sort of method to the madness because those videos always blow up, don't they? Oh, my God.

And that's why I see them because then my algorithm has straight in it. No, it doesn't have any of the boy words in it. But it gets on my feed. It'll be because of podcast. Oh, you're right. Yeah, and also the amount of views. They always blow up because it stirs the pot whenever these straight men put these problematic things out in the world.

The funny thing is, it's essentially the anti version of us. It's the straight version of what we do. I mean, I'm not saying that we're the most intelligent podcast. Like, we're as dumb as they come. But we talk about inane shit too. But like, there's just a certain way about these straight men delivering their podcast. So like I've got an example. This is just the sort of things that you might hear on a straight man podcast.

One thing I hate about going to restaurants is when they ask for a tip. I feel like in Australia we just don't do that, right? Yeah, no, I get far. So like I was like, yeah, can we just have the bill? They bring it over and they've got like the receipt printed out and they put it on the table and they're like, we'll be back. And I was like, so you're just waiting for me to write a tip? There's a thing down the bottom for tip.

I'm like, nah, not happening. Nah, never happened. The screen literally said, would you like to tip? And there's like a yes or no button. I was like, oh fuck, it's in her hand. And I was like, no. And then Babe was like, I'm like such a piece of shit. Like she

said it like this and I was like, nah, no tip for you. Nah, I can get fucked. It's fucked what to be fair they actually sound quite fun i feel like i get along with them what's the name of that show but there's just something about the way they do this thing that my brother does right where they talk and it's like they don't open their mouth very wide so that i kind of know it's kind of like this like they sound like you're mumbling a bit yeah like oh fuck that i'm not tiffin you know fucker they just keep their lips really close together when they talk. And they laugh so aggressive and really quickly.

Yeah, fuck it. And then they immediately result to insults. Always. Like, always have to insult somebody. And also, I love, that was the most basic observation. Yeah. I mean, like I said, we can't talk. We're quite bloody basic when it comes to our observations too.

However, this is the sort of problematic shit we're talking about that always blows up. Okay. So this is what we need to channel in our experiment. All right. As a male, I could have 18, 30, 40, 50 women pregnant at the same time. As a female, you can only be pregnant by one man at a time. And further, it benefits you as a woman to stick to that man because the more you get pregnant the more your value declines stretch marks losing the vaginal

elasticity and all of these meaningful things that attract men so you are one who should stick with a man so monogamy is very meaningful for women whereas for a male who has a lot of resources, monogamy is not a necessity. Shut up! I feel sick. I feel fucking sick. Vaginal elasticity. Oh my God. What an idiot.

And the ding. Why do they need the tic sanitizer? I know! And so anyway, these always blow up, don't they? Always. Millions of views. So this is our experiment. So we're going to pretend we're straight.

Yeah. Okay. So we need to change quite a few things. What we're going to do is, for those listening, you're in on the joke. So this is our experiment. So we're going to pretend we're straight. Yeah. Okay. So we need to change quite a few things. What we're going to do is, for those listening, you're in on the joke. This is a long game. We're going to do our impression of a straight man podcast. We're going to put it up on our podcast feed, which has quite a few thousand followers. Yeah, it'll be on our TikTok.

So you idiots listening right now, you've got to go to the comments and be outraged as soon as you see the video. Don't be like, this is hilarious. I'm in on the joke. We want people to see if they believe that we're a straight podcast. Just be like, there's people like this in the world and it's just sad that people think this way. Yeah, or amen, brother, with the praying emoji.

Now, the problem is, Mitch, our screen's behind us, they're not straight. We need to fix them up. Oh, do you reckon they're a bit limp-wristed, do you? Yeah, something about the hot pink and the yellow. They're always in like a, it's like a home office. It's never a good set. Yeah, why do straight men just avoid studios?

Like they're always just in their lounge room. Can you find a really disgusting bedroom? Find us a share house lounge room. 100%. With one half dead palm frond in the back. And they always have a cheap boom arm. Oh, this is good. I reckon I'm going to be the giveaway. I'm not going to sound straight at all. I can't have a cheap boom arm. Oh, this is good. I reckon I'm going to be the giveaway.

I'm not going to sound straight at all. Like, I can't say anything problematic like that. Oh, yeah, true. Isn't that ironic? I've got a higher voice than you. Oh, my God, that is you. Oh, my God, Sam. He just has the most disgusting blow-up mattress on a carpeted bedroom

with boxes and no furniture. Oh, yeah. And a used coffee mug on the ground. Oh, that is foul. Okay, you nailed it, actually. Well, he is a on the ground. Oh, that is foul. You nailed it, actually. Well, he is a straight man. That's actually Sam's bedroom. You're going to have to say something really dumb.

Well, don't go too far. Just like really uninformed and stupid. Yeah, okay. And then I'll just be like your hype man that just eggs you on. Yes, because there was one in that first one that would just repeat what the host was saying and then they'd laugh. Actually, Jenna, you're going to have to be, like I said, the pick-me girl. Yeah. That just never stands up for women.

It just goes, yeah. Yeah. Sam, is there like a hat out there so I can look straight? Oh, yeah. Oh, yes. Hang on. Give me a minute. Or I can just put my hood on.

I'm going to give myself a front fringe. Do I look straighter if I put my hood up? Is that better? You do, actually. You do. No, that's good. So, yeah, don't show your perfectly coconut-oiled hair. They'll know straight away.

All right, this is my fringe because what do straight men do? They love to cover their receding hair. True. I like to do that too. Shut up. That's why I've embraced the middle part. I'm going to button all the way up. Is that straight?

Sam, is there like a hoodie or something out there to make Mitch look more straight? He still looks gay to me. No, you need the full button up. Like a lad? No, you look like a bloody altar boy. So is there no hat out there, Sam? Oh, I think he's found one. He's found a hat. He's found it.

Fuck yes. This will change everything. Oh snap back. You're going to have to loosen that thing for your big head. Anyone have an extended belt? Should I wear it front way or back way? Back way. Definitely. Oh god, there we go. Yeah, that's it.

That's it. Have you guys ever seen me with a hat on? Never. It's skewing a bit humpty dumpty just quietly. I've got Mitch's bum bag on. Yeah, wear my bum bag. I'll be the lad, yes. Sorry, that's my purse.

I think you'll find. And that's the difference. Perfect. There we go. Holy shit. Did you just see your own reflection? I look heterosexual. Yes.

Okay. I don't even know what let's just let's just roll okay so this is us channeling a stupid uninformed straight man podcast and you just know that if this was real it would be called couple of bitches no it'll be called like lads unfiltered or something you know no yeah yeah and our logo would be a redback spider with our faces in the middle. But don't say anything too fucked up. Just say something dumb. But like you say it with such conviction. Oi, dude, I got a theory, right?

Yeah. That breast milk isn't real. Mitchell, lower the tone. You sound like you're like, breast milk isn't real. Too animated. Breast milk isn't real. Okay, true, true. Don't you reckon?

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Alright. Okay. But herezmuk isn't real. Okay, true, true. Don't you reckon? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Right. Okay. But here's the thing, but bro, women are lying about their periods, man.

That's so true. Put your mind to it for a second and think about it, right? And I'll put this to the room. Chicks love to waffle on about their period. Yeah.

Oh, I get every two weeks. I get every two weeks. Oh, it's fucking constant, man. Where's the proof when you think about it? It's so true, bro. Get this right. The only periods I know in my life, high school, finishing home economic, you finish English,

you finish mathematics. What about maybe when you're writing a sentence and you finish that thing? Nah, you lost me there, man. I don't know what you're talking about. The thing at the end of a sentence? That's a period. Yeah, like how are we supposed to know that you're actually telling the truth? Like, you're that thing. No, you lost me there, man. I don't know what you're talking about. The thing at the end of a sentence? That's a period. Yeah, like, how are we supposed to know that you're actually telling the truth? Like, you're a chick.

I've never actually seen a period, eh? So you could just be a conspiracy, eh? I don't know. I'm so with you. And they lie like this. They get us. They try to get us. Yeah, look at her.

She's being all flirty. You want me, don't you? It's not even true, man. And I've never seen anyone buy periods. Don't be, don't you? It's not even true, man. And I've never seen anyone buy periods. No, I think that was really profound from us.

I think we made some points. Periods. The first one, they just basically described how paying at a restaurant works and they thought it was groundbreaking. So we need to do something really simple and think that it's groundbreaking. Hear me out. Let's try. Oh, you're actually doing it now? Yeah.

Okay, hold on. You have to give me warning. It takes a while for me to get into straight man character. All right. Ready? And that's why giving birth should cost money. But more on that later. Hey, today, petrol.

They're all the same, bro. 93, 94, 96. It all comes from the same pit, man. Yeah, I reckon it's not even any different. You just put it in and the car goes. It doesn't even matter. I've got a friend, right? Blake.

Blakey! Blakey! Oi, you fucked Blake at the Christmas party twice in the night. Oi, nah, man. She doesn't like to talk about it. She fucked Blake. Yeah. She fucked Trevor.

And then she fucked blake yeah she fucked trevor and then she fucked blake again fuck man no you gotta you gotta stop doing that man you gotta keep yourself pure you gotta dedicate yourself to the one man once you find him but that's the thing stacy lee no one actually respects a woman yeah that has kissed a man before they kiss you. Yeah, like the lips just feel dirty, man. You know what I mean? Like, oh, God. They feel dirty? But if I want to kiss someone, it doesn't matter.

But for girls, nah. Nah. Nah. It's true. It's so true. It is true. Yeah, see, even she agrees. Like, women are just not speaking up, you know.

Like, they all think this shit, but they're not brave enough to say it. Is that what you think, Stacey Lee? Exactly. And that what you just said there is profound. Yeah. Stacey Lee. When did we change names? Oh, I hate it.

I hate it. I feel disgusting. I'm like, 93. Okay, so if you see these videos on our TikTok, go be offended or agree with us and say equally stupid shit in the comments. And another thing. Yeah.

That ding is so annoying. Yeah. So dumb. Our ding is much more theatrical because we're Moes. Yeah. What a performance that tick is. You want to hear their incorrect buzzer? Doesn't exist because men can't be wrong in their eyes.

You're so right, man. That's so right. It's so fucking true. So fucking true. Yeah. True. Preach. Is it just me?

Oh, no, this next one we're going to listen to, our next favourite bit. This is from the Iconic 100th episode, which I would like to let you all know is our most listened to episode ever, by the way. Oh, round of applause for us. People love that episode. I think to me, build up tension. I don't know why people like that so much.

Yeah, it's just a milestone episode, I reckon. And in this episode, do you remember, I kind of did an impression of you. Did you? Yeah, because we were doing is it just me's about each other. Something we've noticed, hate or appreciate about each other. And this is what I noticed about you.

Does Mitchell Cheery like to mansplain shit to international listeners sometimes? Yes! What? Yes! That is so true! Hold on. It's just some things that you interrupt me when I'm mid-sentence. You'll be like, hang on, hang on, hang on.

We should clarify for the international listeners. And sometimes it's necessary. You'll be like, oh, Koshi is like our Matt Lauer, the morning breakfast. Yes. And sometimes the context is necessary, but sometimes it's condescending. It is not.

It's needed. It's like, oh, no, no, wait, wait, wait, wait. The internationals, they wouldn't understand this. So we have these rectangular prisms that are sort of flat, maybe the size of a welcome mat, and they're called pillows. No. Made of foam, and we use them for the sleeping. I don't know what you guys call them, but we call them pillows.

I've never mansplained a pillow. There's some times that I'm like, they probably got it. They probably got it. I'm media trained. Because when you work in radio, all they do is you've got to set up. You've got to set up new listeners. Because when you're listening to radio, you've got new listeners every 15 fucking minutes.

There's mansplaining again. There it is. There it is. When you listen to the radio. For my international listeners, a radio is a terrestrial broadcast device. I admit it. I do. I do.

And for the international listeners, we have these cylindrical bits of plastic and it's kind of like a pencil, but there's ink. We call them pens. I don't know what you call them there, but yeah, we call them pens. I'm not that annoying. Well, call me out on it next time. And, sorry, basically what Mitchell Coombs is saying to our international audience, fuck you.

I would never say such a thing. Screw you. I just have more faith in them than you do, that they know what we're on about. I don't want them to have to Google. If we're talking about Kerry Ann Kennelly, which we do every fucking week. That's one thing you've never been explained. How would you say, for the internationals, Carrie Ann is? I'd say, have you ever heard of the dinosaurs?

That's all you need to know for the internationals. You know when you get out of the bath and you've been in there for ages and your hands go all wrinkly? Just picture that all over. Yeah. An awful, awful lady. Yeah. Yeah, that's her.

That's her in a Camilla and Marks dress. Oh, Camilla and Marks for the international listeners. It's an Australian undercover designer brand. Something that soccer mums wear. Well, I'm going to stop. Listen, I am pre-COVID. I was in and out of the States. No, it's not bad.

So I just wanted to make sure the audience that I've brought from LA is up to date. I'll cop that on the chin. I will. No, I don't think it's a bad thing. It's something I noticed. You ever said it was something I hate? Would you have something you hate and I can clear the air? No.

Actually, I don't want to tell you something that I hate because you've actually stopped doing it. And if I remind you, you might start doing it again. Oh, what is it? Fucking the live tweets. You stopped doing that. I've just gotten lazy. Yeah, good. Just don't bring live tweets. You stop doing that. I've just gotten lazy. Yeah, good.

Just don't bring them back. It's still right here, guys. It hasn't moved. It hasn't moved. It's been there the whole show. So has Danny Minogue. So has the helicopter. They're all there.

I'm just lazy. You know, I got a DM the other day on Instagram. Can't remember her name, but this lovely lady. She goes, hi, Mitchell. I'm a trash bag. I love Trash Alley. I've just started listening to Is It Just Me? I'm really struggling with the fucking live tweet sound effect. And I said, hang in there.

And I told her around episode 70, I think he forgot about that bit. So just start listening from there. And she literally said, thank you so much. I was like, I knew it. Someone else found it as irritating as me. The amount of messages I get of support. Oh, we don't have time to get into that, unfortunately. For the live tweets.

The number will astound you. And in fact, I'll tell you straight after this. WSFM time saver traffic. That's my favourite one. I knew I shouldn't have said it. It reminded you. They're back for 100 and beyond, ladies and gentlemen. Is it just me?

The rude shocks of young adulthood. Now, this next little throwback, this is not so much an impression, but I did want to listen back to this because this is kind of the early days, if not the inauguration of your 90-year-old lady alter ego, Dot Wiggins. Remember this? It was back in episode 50. Do you remember how Dot came to be? Oh, my God. I don't even remember the inception of Dot Wiggins.

So, this is exciting. The inception. That's the word I was looking for. Thank you. Yeah. No worries. What happened? How did she come about?

So, do you remember this was back in my single days? It's kind of weird to listen back to this now, but I was bitching to you about the fact that I just kept having all these guys on Tinder leading me on, ghosting me. I'd go on dates and they didn't have the decency to tell me, I don't want to see you anymore. They would just randomly stop replying. And I was just getting really sick of going through that process thinking, oh, do they like me or not? It was just driving me insane. And being the gorgeous friend you are, you did what any good friend would do and you prank called one of the guys that had ghosted me as Dot Wiggins, the RMS worker. Oh, my God.

I remember this. Okay, so I don't remember this going well, but why don't we just, why don't we play it? Because, yeah, this is me as RMS worker, the very, very first Dot Wiggins prank call. Is it just me or? Do men need to stop being so flaky? Oh.

I just, I can't anymore. Yeah? I've just had, I've had two weeks from hell where I've just had countless people lead me on and then just not be interested, which by the way, is fine. I'm not desperate and dateless. I'm quite happy being single. It's more just the inconvenience. Yes.

I hate being, I hate having my time wasted. The ones I actually go on the dates with, always a good time. I always have a good time. But it's more the ones where you chat and then you exchange numbers, maybe you exchange social media, and then it gets to the point where you're like, oh, yeah, maybe we should go on a date. We should go for a drink sometime. And not to toot my own tit, but they're often the ones suggesting it to me.

And I don't know about you, but if someone suggests to you, hey, let's go on a date is that not their cue to organize it yes and this can be tricky but if the person that instigates it is normally the one that should be following up on these things I feel like that's true and I'm not going to beg and be like so whatever happened to that date like are we going or not yeah I just I've had so many suggestions and I've been like yeah sure let's it. And then we can keep chatting for days after and then nothing eventuates. And I'm just like, it's so frustrating. Don't, don't ask me in the first place if you didn't actually want to.

Is this a new thing or is it a COVID thing? Or you've had this, this has been irking you for years. This has been a thing for years, but it's only been boiling my blood recently because basically January to August, maybe even september i was just not dating at all yeah like i was just not interested but now that things are returning to normal it's less frowned upon to socialize i'm back on the dating scene and i'm loving it but i'm also reminded at how frustrating it is there was there's been a few one guy messaged me on a sunday yes and goes, I'd like to make you dinner next week.

And I'm like, that'd be great. That's a romantic thing to say as well. 100%. And you'd be excited. No one's ever offered me that before. It sounded beautiful. Yeah, that's very sweet. And we'd been chatting for a bit.

It wasn't just out of the blue. But I was like, sure, let's do it. And then messaged him on Friday and said, so, like, are we still doing this? And he goes, sorry, I've got a boyfriend now. I was like, it's been three days. How did that happen? That's rare. Like, congratulations.

I'm now married. I'm so sorry. My child's being born. Yes. Oh, that's the worst. And then there was another one that was like, oh, yeah, let's go on a date. Super keen. He was the one, you know, pursuing me.

And then it was like, oh, sorry, we agreed to go that day, but I can't do it. I'm working then. Oh, sorry, I've got a family thing then. Oh, sorry, I've got this. And I'm like, if you're not actually interested, you can just stop postponing. It is altogether cancelled.

Oh, Mitch. And he didn't reply. Oh, Mitch. I was just like, why even bother? Like, I feel like unless I actually feel something or mean something, I just don't say it. Yes. I'm not going to tell someone I want to go on a date with them if I don't.

And also not something that you're looking forward to all week. I've got that dinner with Mitch. No, it's not like that. I don't look forward to it. But it's more like I don't necessarily make plans with my friends because I'm like, oh, I'm pretty sure I'm meant to be seeing someone that day. And then it doesn't happen. Does it chip away at you when this happens?

I wouldn't say it chips away at me because like I said, I am quite happy being single. It's just annoying. Yeah. It's like, why bother suggesting it if you're not going to follow through? Yeah, I agree. I'm pissed off for you. It's just so annoying. Would it make you feel better if I prank called one of them?

How would that make you feel better? I don't know. I'm trying to think of anything that I can do. I don't think that would help. Give me one! that I can do. I don't think that would help. Give me one. I'll call the nurse. No, we shouldn't do that. No, I will pretend that I think it's my grandson and I've got the number wrong.

Oh, okay. So you're not actually going to tie it back to me or? No, no. There'll be no way. Oh, that's fine. I thought you were going to be like, my grandson Mitchell. No, no, no. This person will never know.

With pleasure. With pleasure. I couldn't care less if they died. You can fuck with them as much as you like. Send me the number. Hold on. Let me. What can I do?

I could probably just say. Which one do I hate? Send me the one that has got a boyfriend now. No, I just messaged him on Instagram. Oh. That one. I'm gay. Let's move on quickly.

Oh, God. There's one here who I. Oh, it fucks me off when they do this. Yeah. They suggest that you go on a date. Yeah. They don't make it happen. They don't follow through.

They don't plan anything. And then you just kind of don't speak for ages. And then the next time they see you, they hit you with the, why haven't we gone on that date yet? Oh. And I'm like, because you didn't fucking organise it. I hate it when they put it back on you. That's like when you go to a restaurant, you order your food

and the waitress goes, I'll be right with you. And then 10 minutes later, haven't you guys ordered yet? It's like, that's your job. That's your job to make sure we order. That's exactly what it is. Let me find another one. I don't want to call him. How do you have these people's numbers?

How do you develop from Tinder to message? Oh, it depends. Sometimes we go to Instagram. Sometimes we go to number. Yeah, right okay so yeah this one you can go this guy i don't give a shit about jamie is that you okay what can i do to freak him out a little bit i don't want you to freak him out oh no maybe we shouldn't do this i'm dialing already hello my name is dot wiggins calling from the rta how are you today the rta yes rose traffic authority okay um well good day uh i just have paperwork here and it's saying that we have an unregistered vehicle parked on Cherry Blossom Street, corner of 9th Blossom,

and it's registered under your name. Which suburb is that? Frankstontine West. Pardon, say again? Frankstontine West. F-R-A-N-K-S-T-O-N-T-I-N-E West. Frankstontine West. Frankstontine West. Okay. A-N-K-S-T-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E-N-E- I'm afraid that there's an unregistered vehicle in your name sitting on Cherry Blossom Ave and it will either be towed or you can come and claim it in the next 24 hours.

I'm just giving you a courtesy call, my dear. Okay. Well, the thing is, is I don't own any vehicles whatsoever. Who? Right. Well, I'll speak to the RTA and I'll see what's happening with that. I am the RTA. Don't be daft.

I don't know that you actually are, though, because you sound a bit odd. Who? Beg your pardon. Regardless of my age, I've been working in the workforce for years. I don't think that bears any judgment on my role here at the RTA. Right. Okay. So what's your name then?

Dot, capital D. D? O.T. Wiggins. O.T.? Sorry, dear Tuttle. He's gone. He won't mess with you again. He doesn't drive.

What? He's one of those Sydney gays that fits the stereotype, can't drive. Oh, no! He really persisted with that longer than he needed to, considering he doesn't drive. Oh, shit. Also, he was Googling the fake suburb.

Is this just part of Dot's, like, is this Dot's catchphrase? He's going, who? Who? When it makes no sense. Yeah, yeah. Asking who when he asks what time it is. Who? Oh, and I sort little walk down memory lane.

Did you have fun, Mitchell? That was lovely. It's absolutely gorgeous. I'm loving it. Why the fuck do we need to bother? We're like the Simpsons at this point, mate. We've done enough episodes. Let's just rerun the classics.

Why make new ones? Truly. Do you think we're going to get to a point where people go, please, is that fucking podcast still going? We just like the first 120. We don't like anything after that point. I know. People will be like, is that still on? Jesus that fucking podcast still going? We just like the first 120. We don't like anything after that point. I know. People will be like, is that still on?

Jesus, are they still going? Are they still rabbiting on? Are they still gay and obnoxious? Yes, we still are. Jenna lives forever, so the podcast will never end as long as Jenna draws breath. So sorry to say, everyone. That is very true. We're back next week for our third best bits and the theme

should we announce what we're doing next week yeah go on you better we get often asked this people often want to hear sex stuff not about Mitch and I but they're so interested in our sex lives like that is the number one question I get asked about what is sex like with you and Hayden

have you and Mitch was there ever any love romance what happens in your life they want to know about Mitch and Sean, the new relationship. So next week we're doing the best of Vigim, sex stuff. Yeah, but his fucking family, listen, I can't delve too much into mine and Sean's sex life. So don't fucking hold your breath. That's not happening next week.

His family, listen. Yes, all of them. Who? Mums and dads or siblings? Yep. Tick, tick, all of them. They do not. Oh my God. Hi, guys. What are their names? Hi. Tick, tick, all of them. They do not. Oh, my God.

Hi, guys. What are their names? Hi. Sean, do you want to give a shout out? Sean, shout out your parents. Who am I shouting out? The family members that listen. Oh.

Hi, mum and dad and Kathy and Connor and Gemma and probably all of the aunties and uncles at this point as well. Why? No, Sean, did Mitch- Your fucking partner won't even listen, Mitchell. Look at the support I'm getting. He did in the early days. Trust me, it won't last long.

Sean, quickly, did Mitch plug the podcast at Christmas lunch? Is that what happened? Did he go around with QR codes trying to flog mugs? No, you should have. What a missed opportunity. We'll organise another barbecue and we'll make that happen. Don't worry. I don't need to.

They already listen. Where did they find the podcast? Are they just interested in you? I don't know why I'm so shocked that someone would be interested after meeting you. Yeah, how fucking dare you? I love that. Hayden's family wouldn't know how to listen to a podcast. Really? Yeah. Yeah, they'd have no interest.

Anyway, next week, it's all about sex stuff. Throwing back to all the times we've talked, not just about ourselves, but other people we've had callers on, we've had guests on. Every time our minds have gone in the gutter really yeah we had literally if you're into anal sex by the way we had i don't know if we're doing the cam fraser chat but we had like a sexologist a sex expert come on so if you're into anal which is 99 of our demo you're gonna love that i think you're preaching to the converted dumb i think i think so now listen you two i think you've got the keys to the church for an extra 20.

I'm going to go and you two do whatever you want, okay? Because what happens in the church stays in the church. All right? Everyone knows that. We can't fucking hit church, Mitchell. No, surely not. We'll get struck by lightning. Mitchell just stood up.

That's the biggest organ I've ever seen in my life. I'm not talking about the instrument. Jesus. Oh, my God. All right. We'll catch you next week Jesus. Oh, my God. All right. We'll catch you next week, Hittit. Thanks for listening. All right.

Go baptise Sean, if you know what I mean. Okay? All right. See you next week, guys. Is that holy water? Are you happy to see me? Oh, wow. Happy New Year.

See ya. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.