Is It Just Me? - BONUS: Farewell John Laws

Episode Date: November 7, 2024

Talkback radio legend, John Laws, is retiring as of today. He has been a fixture on this podcast for the last 5 years (which is nothing compared to his 70 years of broadcasting)  Not only have we played his iconic bits during our 'Talkback Tingz' segment, but we even got the chance to sit down with him for an interview. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You're listening to Is It Just Me? A podcast by a couple of Mitches. I put the radio on. Oh, the time has come, Cheery. The legend of Talkback Radio himself, John Laws, is retiring as of today, November 8th. Yeah, officially off the air after 70 years broadcasting. This is his last day doing Talkback Radio, which is sad for us, a couple of radio nerds. Yeah. Any regular listeners of ours know that we bloody love a good John Laws moment.

Just search John Laws, Is It Just Me? There'll be heaps. We love to play his golden bits, so it's a bit sad that we won't get those anymore. I know. I'm going to miss him, but it also makes me happy knowing that we're off air and he is as well, so any blunder that he would make, we'd miss. Exactly. He's bowing out just before us i know chicken he's a coward he wanted to beat us

to the punch and so uh if you miss it this is how john announced that he was retiring from radio it's time for a rest is what i think and uh you know i've done it for a very, very, very, very long time. And I think that I'll just call it a day and call it a day pretty soon. Probably beginning of November. Beginning of November, I think, is probably the time. But I've done it for 70 years. That's a long time. Long time. Fantastic years.

Fantastic years. I had a really, really good time, and loved, you know, most of it, loved almost every minute of it, I'll travel, I'll sit about, I'll read more than I read now, which is a hell of a lot, but I'll read more, and when I call it a day, it'll be a day, I'm not going to go away and then come back again and say, oh, it was all a mistake. It may well be a mistake, but there'll be no return. No return. That's it.

He's just a bit tired. It's giving Tracy Grimshaw. I'm not old. I'm just a bit tired. Is that what she said? She needs a rest. Oh, you know what? I can just picture him with a cuppa, sitting down, a good book. A scotch or old. I'm just a bit tired. Is that what she said? She needs a rest. Oh, you know what? I can just picture him with a cuppa, sitting down, a good book.

A scotch or something. A scotch, an afternoon nap, late lunches with rich billionaire friends. Like, come on. Now, I think it's safe to say that we could describe John Laws as a friend of the show. Yeah, friend of the pod. We were lucky enough to sit down with him. We'll play you that in a sec. But because we're also bowing out of the broadcast game,

Emily, one of our idiots, suggested for our bucket list the things we want to do before we wrap up the podcast for good. She said, John Law's sending you guys off one final time. And beautifully said, yes. We put it on the bucket list. We know one of his producers who is one of our kind. Yes, he is. Oh, just queer he is. His name's Zen. We love Zen. I said, do you reckon you could get a message from John saying farewell to us

and our podcast, good luck with everything, whatever. And he's like, yeah, leave it with me. And I said, even if he says no to hell with that, I don't want to be doing that. Just record that. That'd be perfect. That'd be perfect. No, no, he did more than that.

He actually recorded a message for us, but I just think he didn't realize who he was talking to. And you'll soon understand why I suspect that. This is it, the message from John. You ready? Okay. Well, fellas, I hope you're happy in your retirements. I tried it once. I didn't like it very much. So I came back to work, But I hope you enjoy your retirement. You know, you'll find you will get bored, but, you know, find a good woman or a good book, preferably the former, and just enjoy yourselves. But if you need any help, if you need any advice, not about the women, no, that's your problem. But if you need any advice about a good book to read,

there's a very good book called A Fortunate Life. I can't remember his name, the bloke who wrote it. A.B. Facing? Yeah, A.B. Facing. Good book. A Fortunate Life. Read that. And then when you're through that, read a bit of Ernest Hemingway

and then go to sleep. Good night. That's it. Go to sleep. Good night. That's it. Go to sleep. Good night. Thanks, John. Thank you, Mr. Lord. That means the world.

We'll do our best to find a good woman. We'll try and a good book. He didn't remember us. His producer said to me, I don't know where he got the retirement thing from. I never mentioned that you guys were retiring. I just said you're ending your podcast. We're 28. We're not retiring, for God's sake. We're gay men. We both have good men.

But anyway, we spoke to John Laws and you were very intimidated by him. You walked away from that being like, that interview was a fucking shocker. That was a disaster. One of my worst ever. I was nervous because I'm a radio guy, like so are you. But, you know, being a radio host, there are many people, it's like the Kyle Sanderland, it's the John Laws, it's the Alan Joneses that you kind of look up to and revere. And I was just very nervous. Also, one of your strengths is like keeping things flowing. Yeah.

But John thrives on awkward silence and I know that about him. So I was in that interview going, oh, he's loving this. I hated it. I hate it. I hate it. He actually, I think, made it more awkward on purpose. Yeah, that's what he's loving this. And I hated it. I hate it. I hate it. He actually, I think, made it more awkward on purpose. Yeah, that's what he's like. Yeah, you'll hear it, though.

This is the moment. Unedited, right? Yeah, let's roll it. Hello, world. I'm John Laws. John Laws. John Laws. Yeah. How are you? Welcome to the show.

I beg your pardon? Welcome to the show, it's great to have you here. It's my show. Is it our show? You're on our show, we're on yours? I mean, you're welcome to put this away. No, no, that's one of the rules. This always remains the John Laws Show. Okay. You're a visitor and you're very welcome.

Thank you. But it's The John Law Show. If you could keep that in mind, I'd be extremely grateful. Got it. Well, we're actually here in the fortress. So this is your territory. What was your useless piece of information for today? How the hell could I remember?

It's three hours ago. Oh, really? You just scrunch it up, get rid of it? Well, you've got to listen if you want to hear the useless information. Yeah, that's good. Hook us in. Now, what are you charming people doing here in my studio? Well, we're big fans, John.

We've been in the industry for six years, five years, so a little dot compared to yours. Yeah. We're diehard fans. We work inside KISS, so alongside Kyle Sanderlands, who, you know, really takes a lot of his inspiration from you. Oh, he does, doesn't he?

He's taken everything from me. Everything, the mic, the headphones. The gold microphone, the headphones, the Rolls-Royce car, the lot, the lot. He hasn't got a single genuine original thought in his rather lovely head. Are you a fan of Kyle? Have you heard the show? I like him. I like Kyle.

Don't underestimate Kyle. He's pretty bright. He's good at what he does. They've been chatting a lot on Kyle and Jackie O Show recently about the fact that a lot of people suspect that Kyle could be secretly gay. What do you mean secretly? They were telling him that you do come across that way. At a glance, some people might suspect that you're gay.

What do you think of that? I don't think so, and it wouldn't matter if he was. A hundred percent it wouldn't. I like Kyle. I get on very well with Kyle. He and I are friends. Yeah? Yeah.

You know, you've got to be careful. That probably was a sweeping statement, but, yes, we're kind of friends. Am I having lunch with Kyle or something, sir? We'd better organise that. Am I having lunch with Kyle or something, Sam? We better organise that. I like having lunch with him. I find him amusing and I find him also a very genuine bloke. I think if you were in trouble, you could turn to Kyle and he'd do his best.

It mightn't be very good, but he'd do his best. I think so too, yeah. Have you had a long lunch with Kyle recently? I had a few. How long are the long lunches, by the way? Nine or ten hours. God. Jeez. That's a few. How long are the long lunches, by the way? Nine or ten hours. God. Jeez.

That's a lie. Probably 13. Do you drink at these long lunches? Are you drinking these days? Am I what? Drinking. Like you have a wine or? Jesus.

Is the Pope praying? Of course I'm drinking. Do you know one thing that Kyle claims as his big claim to fame is that his first radio gig was panelling your show in Townsville or something? That's also my claim. 2PK in Parks. When I was doing work experience, I had to make sure the ads for John Laws were playing in time, all of that.

So that was my first. And 2PK with Betty Muzichuk. Who? Don't you remember Betty? The Spicer family owned 2PK. Oh, okay. And the daughter or stepdaughter or daughter-in-law or somebody, her name was Betty Muzichuk.

Really? And she ran the station when I was there. I was only there one night. I hated it. You worked at 2PK? Yeah, I did, one night. For one night. What happened?

They wouldn't let me smoke. In the studio? Yeah. How long ago was that? 1954, probably. Okay. Do you still smoke or have you quit? Oh, no, I quit ages ago.

Oh, okay. Would you like to try a vape? That's bloody stupid. Mitch is hooked on the vapes. No, I'm quitting. Is it difficult to quit? Why would you take up something that is difficult to quit? Well, I think for people...

I'll tell you why. Yeah. Because you're young and stupid. No, I can't argue with that, actually. That's completely fair. But, yeah, I always tell people don't start them because they're way easier to get hooked on than cigarettes. There's no, ugh, this tastes gross to overcome.

They're just pleasant from the get-go. So don't go there is always my advice. Yeah, well, you're giving very good advice. Yeah, do as I say, not as I do. You're maturing at an early age. You're giving very good advice. Don't do it if it's going to be addictive and expensive. Good advice.

That includes marriage unless you're very careful. John, I was listening to your speech at the Kennedy Awards, the Lifetime Achievement Award, which congratulations, by the way. That was very exciting. Thank you. careful john i was listening to your speech at the kennedy awards the lifetime achievement award which congratulations by the way that's very exciting thank you i've just come in my life i haven't had the best year this year so i've been a particularly good one i've lost my dear friend brian davison but i also lost my my adorable caroline who I've been in love with since I was 15 years old. Now she's gone out of my life, and that makes me sad. But a case like this can't make a difference.

Thank you all very, very much. You said that you didn't intend to get into broadcasting, so I guess I want to know, how did you fall into it? that you didn't intend to get into broadcasting. So I guess I want to know, how did you fall into it? Well, I was a jackaroo in Wellington in central New South Wales and I love being a jackaroo. I would love to be a jackaroo again but I can't afford it. But I used to go to the Legacy Ball and the Bachelor's Ball

and the Spinster's Ball and they used to get to the Legacy Ball and the Bachelor's Ball and the Spinster's Ball. They used to get me to do a commentary, you know, to introduce people as they came in the door. And there was a man there from AWA, which at that time was a huge conglomerate of radio stations all over Australia. And he heard me and he asked me did I want to get into radio and I wasn't sure, but the man I was working for, a wonderful welchman by the name of Llewellyn Powell,

he thought it would be a pretty good idea if I were to do that, get me off his property and get me somewhere else. So I just fell into it that way and loved it. Fell in love with it, clearly. Yeah. How long have you been doing it now? 68. Are you taking notes there? I'm doing the crossword. It just shows you how involved, that's the Mother Superior. I'm doing a very important interview with two very important young men,

and she's doing a bloody crossword? Jesus. It's so nice to put a face to the name The Mother Superior. I hear her referred to all the time on the show. Well, are you impressed? I am, absolutely. She's pretty much what I envisioned actually, yeah. Is she really?

Yeah. Well, she gave us a talking to before we came in. She said, you're up to no good, you're going to be good. And we said, yeah, we'll be right. We're on our best behaviour. Yeah, well, that's the way to be. Yeah, that's right. All right, so what else do you want to talk about?

Well, I should have given you a heads up before we started that on the podcast, I don't know if you're much of a swearer, but you're allowed to swear here. Do you swear much? Don't be fucking stupid. But that word has become almost acceptable now, except around here she hates it. The Mother Superior hates it.

Doesn't like me swearing at all. Would the Mother Superior appreciate being described as a boss bitch? Because that's what I would think the Mother Superior is. A what? A boss bitch. What's that mean? It's a wonderful term, don't worry. Powerful woman.

Yeah. But is the word bitch there? It's a term of endearment. It's all about context, you know. Taking it back and empowering. No, don't use that word. My apologies. I take it back, Mother Superior.

Yeah, take it back. What's your advice for someone like Mitch to last that long in radio? It's been seven so far. My advice to Mitch, give it away. Really? Yeah. Get out. Get a job as a salesman at Bunnings.

Yeah. No, no. I'll give you very good advice. Enjoy it. If a job as a salesman at Bunnings. Yeah. No, no. I'll give you very good advice. Enjoy it. If you enjoy it, do it. If you don't enjoy it, don't do it. And be natural. Don't bullshit.

No change of voice. No change of attitude. Just got to be you. Authentic. Yeah. Well, I don't know how authentic you are, but just be yourself, in other words. Now, what happened in the middle? Because you left for a bit.

You had a big retirement. You were out, and then you came back. Yeah. You missed it too much. I did miss it. I missed it greatly, and I got very bored with my own company, even though up until that time, I'd been pretty good with my own company. I love reading.

I love sitting by myself. I love thinking. But I did get bored. I did get bored and I thought, you know, it would be fun to go and do it again. And it's more fun the second time around than it was the first time around. Really? Yeah. Fell back in love with it?

Yeah. Oh, no, better now. Yeah. We like to play on our podcast some bits of gold that happen on Talkback Radio because we figure that our younger listeners might not be listening as often as we are, so we're like, if anything good happens, we'll tell you. And you've come up many times,

including the infamous Pikes Nursery incident. That caller... It's our favourite. I'll tell you what to do. Ring Pikes Nurseries. What nursery? Pikes. Pikes.

Yes. P-Y-K-E-S. P-I-A-T-M. Would you spell that again for me? P-I-A-T-M, did you say? No, ma'am. No, I said P-Y. Oh, Y.

Yes, P-Y as in Yankee. K as in Kilo. E as in Echo. S as in Stupid. Pikes, P-Y-K-E-S. Pikes Nurseries. P-Y-A-T-E. Will we try it again, ma'am?

I don't. Okay, you ready now? Have you got your pencil handy? Oh, yeah. Okay, P. B. No, P. P, yeah.

As in piddle. Y. P-I. Oh, save me from this. No, P. P, P. You've got the P there. Yeah, I've got a P.

That's right. And a Y. A Y as in Yankee. That's right. Okay. Then you have a K. A. K as in kill. K. Is it P-Y-A? K! Don't get excited, John. Don't get excited, ma'am. Can I ask you a leading question? Yes. Do you have trouble hearing?

I have, yes. Yes. All right, ma'am, well, we'll try it again. P-Y. P-Y. K. K. K.

P again? Yes, no, darling. K as in kill. Yes. Yes, E, thank you. K as in kill. E-S? Yes, E-S. God, you got that. Would you spell it back to me now? P-Y-A.

No, I'm sorry. Oh, no, it's not right. Oh, it's not right. Oh, it's not right. P-Y-K-E-S. P-A-Y-E. Where do you get the A from? I haven't said an A anywhere. P.

P. You got the P. I got that, yes. Right. Y. P-A. No, Y, Y, Y, Y, Y as in Yankee. P-Y. Yes. K. E. Oh, God save me. How can a K and an E sound alike? K. Yes, I will. I will. I swear, I'm going

to throw myself right down the microphone and choke you to death in a minute. That's what I'm going to do. P-Y-E, did you say? No, no, I didn't. I don't know. I don't think we're ever going to make it, ma'am, are we? Oh, well, it's... I don't think that I'm ever going to be able to give you this telephone number. I mean, this is just the name. Imagine it when I start to get to the telephone number.

It's a nursery, isn't it? Yes, it is, strangely enough. All right, well, Give me the number of it. Oh, God, can I? That's the telephone number. Yes, all right, here you are. Are you ready? I'll take the risk. Are you ready? Yes. Okay, do you have your pen at the ready? Yes. Okay. Six. Six. Six. Good, that's very good. Three. Six what? Three. E. Oh, Jesus. How can E be a number? I don't know, but I just can't... A cat seems to vibrate in my ear.

Okay, well, I'll say it very quietly now. Yes. Can you hear me? Yes. Six. Yes. Three. Three. Very good. Yes. Six, three. Nine.

Nine. And another nine. Yes. Eight. Eight. Very good. Five. Five. One. One. Yes. That's it. Yes, would you read it back to me? 6, 3, 9, 9, 5, 8, 5, 1. You've got it. You've got it. I have. So just dial the telephone number and God help Bruce Pike. I really want to hear from your point of view. What were you thinking?

What were you feeling when that call? I just could not understand what you were saying. Well, I thought this was going to go on forever, but then I thought this could be very good radio. So I decided to stay with it, and she started to understand the humour of it as we got towards the end of the conversation. You reckon that she was in on it too after a while? No, no, not in on it, but I think she started to understand

the humour of it. Okay. No, she wasn't going along with it deliberately. She was laughing at herself. Yeah. It was a good call. It was a fun call. Yeah, definitely.

And it lives on in our podcast as well. At the start of every show, we play the audio. That's how we start our show every week. You didn't even ask. It's on YouTube. Did you know that? I don't go to that thing. I can't work computers.

Oh, well, you're paddling your show right now, aren't you? You've got some sort of understanding. I know. That's just a board that's got stuff on it, like Tom T. Hall, bit of music here. There you are. That's how simple it is. Well, who says you can't work at a computer? There you go. Yeah. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. I don't suppose you're ever going to get to that stage where, like a lot of other radio studios, like at Kiss,

you'll have cameras in the room filming everything. No, never. You don't want stuff on Facebook or all that? Of course I don't. Of course I don't. Fair. I do a radio program and I'm a radio broadcaster and that is the limit of my talent. Yeah.

Who else do you listen to, John? Do you have any other shows that you listen to or do you just? Do you know what I listen to? No, what is it? As soon as I leave here, yeah, at midday or whenever I leave here, ABC Classic. Really? I love classical music and they play a lot of light classical music.

They play a lot of ballet music and I love ballet music. I love the ballet. So there you are. That surprised you, hasn't it? Have you ever podcasted? Do you know how to listen to podcasts? Are you into them? No, I don't know how to do that.

You'd make a killing. Don't you think a podcast by John Laws would be huge? Does he know that his show is podcasted every day? You actually can listen to it as a podcast. Oh, so you technically have a podcast. You've got one. Yeah, I don't know what it is even. You know how Netflix is TV shows on demand,

podcasts are radio shows on demand. That's pretty much the basic way of explaining it. And that's what we are. Like you can't tune in at a certain time to us. We're just there whenever you like. Not live. No, well, it can't be live. No.

No. Are you bored now? No, not at all. Not the slightest. I don't want to bore you. No, we're not bored. No, not at all. I'm loving this.

You know another old job that John used to have, Mitch? Am I right in saying you used to be what we call a rouseabout in a shearing shed? That's exactly what I was. What's a rouseabout in a shearing shed? You pick up the dregs and the shed off the tails of the lambs. Oh, the dags. Yeah. And you also, if you're lucky, you get to use the wool press a bit. And pressing the wool, that's lets tough work but it's great fun how long did you do that job for 18 months no i wouldn't last a day i was a farm boy raised on a farm mum and dad used to always try and get me to help out with that stuff but i was like not for me i was a bit too precious for that would that surprise you i can tell you're a bit precious i've detected that but i was smart enough to realize if i do that job really badly,

they'll stop asking for help. So I just kept stuffing up. It was fantastic. Yeah, but if you did it well, they'd keep asking you to do it and they would have. But it would have been very good for you. All that wool press stuff was good. All that wool shed stuff was good and the blokes, the shearers

and the mates you'd make and the shearers cook. They could cook. They'd say, oh, they could cook. They used to cook great stuff, shepherd's pie, cottage pie. They would bring food to serve because I ended up, when I was no good at the rouse about duties, I ended up serving morning tea. Like I was the one giving the food. So they would bring food.

No, no, they'd cook it there. But, yes, they'd bring the food with them. Oh, they were good too, the shearing cooks. Yeah, great. Yeah, you had a way better shearing shed experience than me. It was hell on earth for me. Could you tell Mitch is a country boy by looking at him? Born and raised, where is it, Parks?

Yeah, well, depends which part of the country, yeah. Have you heard of Bogangate? It's just near Parks. That's where I'm from. You're from where? Bogangate. I've heard of Bougain. I've been to Bougain Gate, haven't I? Have you?

You've been to Bougain Gate. Is there a station in Bougain Gate, Mitch, a radio station? Well, Parks is our local. No, no, no, no. But when I went around Australia, I wasn't doing radio. I was just going around Australia. Yeah, blink and you'll miss it. That's what.

It's a very good idea. You know, people, I remember my sister, as soon as she turned 15 or something, all she talked about was going to England. She just wanted... Everybody wanted to go to England. Nobody bothered to have a look at Australia. Greatest country in the world. I've always thought that.

Like, everyone's excited now that, you know, international flights are a thing again after lockdown. But I would rather just travel Australia, like Ballaroo and stuff like that. It's a good thing to do. It's a great country. Do you have a favourite city or are you a Sydney boy? You've always been a Sydney boy.

I'd like to go. If you settle into a place long enough, it becomes your favourite. Oh, yeah. Did you ever live overseas? Never lived overseas, no. I believe you were working in the US, though, weren't you, when JFK was assassinated. You reported on that, am I right?

Yes, that is quite right. Bear in mind, this is a long, long time ago. This is a sad day in the history of the United States. The President of the United States of America, John Fitzgerald Kennedy, has been assassinated, killed by a rifle bullet. I'm in Hollywood in California, and in a matter of hours, I've seen probably one of the most colorful cities in the world become a city in mass mourning. And this is just one city of an entire nation in mourning. Grown men and women are crying openly,

almost proudly, in the streets of Hollywood. All the entertainment has ceased in Hollywood, the hub of the world's entertainment. Shops and offices and factories closed within a matter of minutes of the announcement of the president's death. That's all I have for you now. So from the midst of this national tragedy that has left America lifeless and in sorrow, I return you to your studios in Australia. Yeah. I remember the day like it was yesterday.

I've got to say that was a good report I did. Good ad lib, eh? Yeah. I went there to open the coaxial cable that came from the United States to Canada, actually, to Australia. The Queen opened it, and I was the support act after the Queen. Right. Yeah, how about that?

Tough act to follow. Have you ever in your career had a co-host or has it always been the John Laws show? The John Laws show. Co-host not for you? You wouldn't think that would work? Listen, if you're getting any ideas, forget it. No, God no. He's got his resume in the bag. It's always been just me.

For a while I did half an hour with, I can't even remember her name now, wonderful woman broadcaster. Jeez, I can't remember her name. John Pearce used to work with her. Anyway, I can't think of it and it doesn't matter because she's thoroughly dead. But for a while I did that and I loved it. Have they ever paired you up with anyone? Because in radio, especially commercial radio,

they love to throw a co-host. Just experiment, yeah. Have I ever what? They had a co-host thrown at you or do they ever try to squeeze someone in and say, John, we think you'd be good with this person? Yeah, they probably have, but I would have told them to piss off. Yeah, get out. We get all the reality stars in commercial radio.

They'll say to me, oh, this person won Love Island Australia. They won Big Brother. Get them on the show. Yeah, get out. We get all the reality stars in commercial radio. They'll say to me, oh, this person won Love Island Australia. They won Big Brother. Get them on the show. Yeah, what for? That's exactly what I say and they don't last. No. Do you watch any of those free-to-air shows these days, Married at First Sight, Love Island, those sorts of shows?

You're kidding. Yeah, neither. Not for me. That's not for us. What about music? Are there any new artists that are out at the moment that you actually enjoy? I just love all music. Fair enough. As I said, I listened to as soon as I finished here. I turned the radio on in the car to ABC Classic.

I love classical music. I love Bruce Springsteen at the moment. I'm playing a lot of his stuff. I love my friend Roger Miller. I love Christofferson. I love music. I love music. Tom T. Hall. All those storytellers are great. Have you ever been a singer yourself? Yes, I've released 17 albums. Really?

Yeah, where have you been? I don't suppose that you would be able to answer this question, but I do wonder if they're on Spotify. Like, I'd love to be able to stream them, these old albums. What? Where would someone have to go to listen to these albums? Oh, I'd love to be able to stream them, these old albums. Where would someone have to go to listen to these albums? Oh, I don't know, here.

Oh, there we go. Look at this, a couple of CDs. Oh my song. You really got it made if you're all in good. Any place on earth but those danger woods. Look at you here with a denim jacket on. This is The Mind and the Music. Yeah, it was called The Mind and the Music because it was an album of poetry

and I wrote all the music and I wrote all the words. So it was called The Mind and the Music. Look at this, all the women in the shorts. You've never been trucked like this before. That's good, I like that. Yeah, I knew you'd like that, you filthy bastard. And I loved singing. I loved singing.

We had a lot of releases and did pretty well. Now put them down. Yes. Can we keep these? Are these for us or are these? No, I can't. Oh, all right. That's all right.

Well, you'll have to get them on Spotify because there's a whole generation that have missed out on the musical talents of John Laws. Get it on what? Streaming. Spotify. An iPhone. Get it on your phone.

I don't want it. I've got it there. Yeah, no, he doesn't care about everyone else listening. He can listen himself. It's all good. Did they get many radio spins? Did you ever play your own music on the radio? Yeah, because nobody else would play it. Yeah, why the hell doesn't care about everyone else listening. He can listen himself. It's all good. Did they get many radio spins? Did you ever play your own music on the radio? Yeah, because nobody else would play.

Yeah, why the hell not, I reckon. There you go. Write that down, Mitch. Start putting out singles and just play them yourself. He's a genius. We actually got Mitch... Do you know how I said that we play things we hear on Talkback and then we kind of take inspiration from them? We got Mitch to improvise a poem

because we heard one of your poems go to air. It was about country people, actually, in small towns. A little town is where everybody knows what everybody else is doing. But they read the weekly newspaper just to see who got caught doing it. Oh, that's a good story. Yeah, and so I heard that and I played it on our podcast and said, Mitch, I think you should start doing poetry like this. And he improvised the whole thing about Britney Spears,

the whole free Britney thing. Like I'd sing doing poetry like this. And he improvised the whole thing about Britney Spears, the whole Free Britney thing. Like I'd sing to music like this. It'd be like, we knew you from a girl. Young, tight and cute. But now look at you like an old haggard boot. Free Britney. Let her out of that cage. Oh, poor Britney. It makes me filled with rage.

Are you across the Britney Spears drama? I don't care. What a drama. Yeah. Why don't they just leave her alone? I agree. Well, they are now, so that's good. Yeah, she's free.

Britney's free now, which is what they wanted. I'm sure John really appreciates that update. What am I doing talking about Britney Spears? I know, I know. Well, this was a pleasure. I really enjoyed this, Mitch. Anything you want to get off your chest with John? Well, I'm wondering if we should ask him the question we ask every guest.

I think you can do that. Okay. So every guest that we have on the podcast, we like to ask them a small thing in life that they appreciate. Like Angela Bishop said her waterbed. Jessica Malboy said... Sitting in the sun.

Being barefoot in a garden. That was one of her small life pleasures. The reason I'm reluctant to ask it is because we call it our list of things better than drugs and dick, which is basically a PSA to young people that there's more to life than boys and partying. No, there's not. No one's ever said that. I'll put that on the list. Is that it? I don't know.

Yeah, if you want. Yeah, we're good. Huh? Yeah. I mean, I'm happy to sit here a bit longer if you want to talk about anything else. No, we're done. I'm good. Thank you for being here.

It was a pleasure. Are you bored now? No. We could stay here all day. Like hell. Thank you very much for coming to visit me. It was very nice of you for being here. It was a pleasure. Are you bored now? No. We could stay here all day. Like hell. Thank you very much for coming to visit me. It was very nice of you to do that. Thank you for having us.

It was a pleasure. You're a legend. It was great to be in your presence and in the studio. Yeah, it's a good studio. It's a big studio. A giant studio. Have you seen the Kiss FM broom closet studio? Like, this is next level.

Has Kyle been in here? Because if he were to see this, renovations would start at Kiss tomorrow. Kyle's studio is a quarter the size of this. Well, so it should be. Yeah. A quarter the talent. Yeah, yeah. Is that it?

You finished now? You're bored now? No, I'm not bored at all. We're loving it. You've got a long lunch to get to, haven't you? Have I? With a lot of people? A few.

What have you got tattooed on your arm? Oh, it says Art Pop. Have I? Mm. With a lot of people? A few. Mm. What have you got tattooed on your arm? Oh, it says Art Pop. Are you familiar with Art Pop? No. It's a Lady Gaga album. No, I like Lady Gaga. Do you?

Yeah. Do you know why I like Lady Gaga? Well, I would suspect that you'd be a fan of some of the classical stuff she puts out. She's got jazz albums as well as the pop stuff. That's right. But also I like her because one of my favourite people in the world likes her, Tony Bennett. Yeah.

And Tony Bennett likes Lady Gaga and Tony Bennett is a gentleman beyond belief and sings like nobody else. And that new album they put out recently is up for like a gazillion Grammys. Oh, yeah. So when they team up, magic happens. Super talent. Do you know something? Mm-hmm.

We're starting to get boring. People listening aren't going to give us stuff about Tony Bennett and Lady Gaga. I'm going now. All right, then. It was a pleasure to have you on. Great to meet you. You didn't have me on.

I had you. Oh, yeah, I did that again, yeah. A pleasure to be here. Well, it's been a pleasure to have you here, and any time you feel like dropping by again, you're quite welcome. The door will always be open. Oh, thank you, John. That's a pleasure.

You're all right, you blokes. Thanks. That's a glowing review if ever I heard one. Thank you, John. Thanks, John. Ta-da. Appreciate it. Is it just me?

A podcast by a couple of Meeches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app. Let me be a little kinder. Let me be a little blinder. To the false of those about me, let me praise a little more.