Is It Just Me? - GUEST: Fidan Tok 🍋

Episode Date: May 23, 2024

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You're listening to Is It Just Me? Welcome to Fidan Talk. Alright, this is a very exciting moment for all of us. This is long awaited on the show, Mitchell. Very long awaited. Yeah, and this was something that I was tasked quite a few months ago. You gave yourself the task. Yeah, I did. I'm the guest booker on the show.

And through your own procrastination, this has accidentally become our most hyped guest ever. I know, I think people, because famously I never end up getting guests. I say, hey, I'm talking to this, I'm talking to Chris Hemsworth and it just never comes off. But this, I was talking to this person for quite a while and it has come off. You will know her as one of Australia's favourite creators, sort of coming out of nowhere, I feel.

You'll have seen her work on TikTok, maybe her book. She's also an author. It's the one and only Fadan. Hi, Fadan. Hi. Hi. Do you do podcasts often? I've seen you on the telly and stuff. No, this is my first podcast.

Oh, great. Okay, well, you can relax here. We just talk shit. It's fine. Yeah, I saw you on the morning show on Sunrise and those shows, we've done live TV. It's like wham, bam, get you in, get you out. You don't get to say what you want.

It's very stressful. Did you find it stressful? Yeah, it went way too quickly. They gave me four minutes of their time and I had so much to say. Well, that's about all I've got time for, Fadan. Thanks, Fadan. I appreciate it. Yeah, it was a bit like that. Listen, we have a present for you.

So Mitch has already given you something off the show. Yes, thank you. The mug. The mug. We gave Fadan a mug. But this is my boyfriend, Stephen, got this for you. We love gifts. I've just got this. Yeah. He did more than that, didn't he? I know. It says Fadan.

It's a little cosmetic bag and it's got a lemon. It's bedazzled. Oh, that's so cute. He bedazzles things. Loves. It's his thing. Thank you. What's his name?

Stephen. Stephen. Love it, Stephen. Thank you. There you go. Beautiful. Just to welcome you to the show because you love your lemons. And I think, Mitch, did I introduce you to Fadan?

Yes. I said, have you seen this woman? She's on TikTok. She's got the catchphrases, the Saturday introduce you to Fadan? Yes. I said, have you seen this woman? She's on TikTok. She's got the catchphrases, the Saturday Platter Day, which we love. I've got the apron. What are some of your other catchphrases? Fuck it, I can afford it. Yes.

I say that a fair bit. The big hole people when I'm putting salt on things because I always use the big hole. The saxer. Squeeze the day, the saxer. Yeah, the saxer. Yeah, I love the saxer, yeah. Yeah, squeeze the day. Yep.

That's another lemon thing. Saturday platter day, I feel, is the more iconic one because you just serve food on a platter. Here's what I find confusing. It's a lot of work, man. It doesn't look like a lot of work. I was going to say, this is what I find confusing about the Saturday platter day thing because the whole idea behind it is

I'm not cooking dinner on a Saturday, I can't be bothered, so instead I'm doing a platter. But I find that more stressful, a platter. I'd rather just make dinner because like my fucking group of gays, they treat making platters like it's a competitive Olympic sport. Who can make the best platter? I just don't get involved. I'm like, here's a fucking packet of Cheezels.

That's my platter. Yeah, they get the salami, they make it a rose. Yes. But you make it look so easy. How do you do that? Yeah, well, because I'm not pleasing anyone. It's just hubby, me and the kids and they look spectacular yeah well it's just pretty you know and it's just fresh stuff so i'll go shopping that day for stuff on the day we don't

get old things out of the fridge we're using all fresh stuff yeah and then i just put it all together and it's just so delicious and you find that easier than making dinner yeah remember i'm cooking every other night so fuck man i'm gonna mix, man, I've got to mix it up. I have to ask, how the fuck do you cut those cucumbers with such confidence? Oh, it's the knife, man. Without cutting yourself? Because, Mitch, you can back me up here. The amount of times I've come in here with fucking band-aids all over my fingers

because I've accidentally sliced it again. Yeah, Mitch is like Edward Scissorhands. And you, you've got a paring knife, you've got a cucumber with the same hand and you're cutting the blade into your thumb. It makes me so stressed watching your videos. I'm like, she's not even looking. She's going to cut her finger. What is the technique?

I think it's an ethnic thing. We just learnt, like, that's how you peel an apple. I know, my armour does the same thing. Yeah, and you just chop, chop, chop, chop. It's how it is. So I can have a chopping board in front of me, but my instinct is not to use it and I'll be like, oh, that's right, there's a chopping board.

But I just like to cut in my hand with the knife. You've never had any platter injuries? Very rare. Okay. Really? That makes you feel a bit more human because it happens all too often. Just when one heals, I'll do it again. It's always cabbage that gets me. Dyson cabbage.

What's cabbage? What's cabbage? No, no, but how does a cabbage come? I've never cut a cabbage. I just buy it shredded. Oh, do you? No. Oh.

Oh, it's like a soccer ball, isn't it? Yeah, but I'm just shredding it myself with a knife. You need to buy it pretty shredded. It's not that hard to understand. No, I live by the packet stuff. Oh, yeah. I love the packets. Oh, the cut broccoli, the zoodles, the cut carrot.

I'm like, you don't have to cut anything. You don't need a knife these days. Salad. Yeah, it's all good. Think of the plastic, Mitchell. Oh, now they're going to come for me for the painting of the plastic. Sorry, guys. I love your TikToks.

I just will turn on, like, after a long day of work and you're making dinner and you're just filming it. It's on TikTok and it's like a 10-minute TikTok. Did you just say, fuck editing? I'm just going to film and I'm going to upload. I don't have time for it. Yeah, I don't even know how to edit. Sometimes I'll be like, ooh, that could be controversial.

I should edit that out. No matter how hard. Who's got time for that? Nobody. Do you worry about the controversy of things or putting things out there Sometimes I'll be like, oh, that could be controversial. I should edit that out. I'm like, ah, who's got time for that? Nobody. Do you worry about the controversy of things or putting things out there online? Because the internet is an interesting place and you surely can upset many people very quickly on the internet. Yeah.

I think I've been on TikTok for nearly two years now and I've learned about being really flippant about stuff. And I used to be because I'd be like, ah, you know, I've got lots of junk in my office that people have sent me and everyone was like really offended that I referred to it, ah, you know, I've got lots of junk in my office that people have sent me. And everyone was like really offended that I referred to it as junk. Yeah. And I didn't, I meant stuff. And I used to mean it interchangeably.

I didn't mean like, um, it wasn't quality items, but I was like, oh, they're right. So then I'm like, when I refer to that, I would never say that again. Cause I learned the lesson. It was, um, it was taken the wrong way. Yeah. Can I actually ask about one of your catchphrases, the whole fuck it, I can afford it thing? Yeah. Recently on the podcast, there was something that happened here. I was talking about the fact that I just paid off my student loan. I just wanted the debt gone. Brilliant. And then

I got a message from someone saying, oh, that's really insensitive during the cost of living crisis to rub that in. Some people would love to be able to clear their debts. You shouldn't be bragging about that. And I was like, oh, sorry, didn't even consider that, taking it on board. But then I see people like you who get away with saying, fuck it, I can afford it. You make no secret of shopping at all the high end places. Do you ever get pushback about that? I do. But I think the reason that it's okay is because I have a full time job. I'm a partner in a law firm. I work very hard.

People will see me working on public holidays, going in on the weekends, coming back home when it's dark, not spending time with my kids because I'm working. So there's the balance of, yeah, I can afford it because I fucking work hard. It's not a I'm an influencer. I make money off you watching me on TikTok and I don't have a real job. So I'm going to flaunt my wealth to you guys and go, it's not that. So I think I can get away with it. Oh, that's an interesting point.

You're not an influencer out there benefiting from the audience. That's how you're making your money. You're going, fuck it, I can afford it because I'm working a nine to five. Yeah, more than nine to five. Yeah, I can imagine. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Because you're a lawyer by trade. Oh, my gosh.

If we said something that Fadan didn't like, Mitchell, she could litigate us. She could end us. I'll sue you. Oh, my God. Would you sue us? No, I'd never. Yeah. Oh, that's a nice answer. You work in family law end us. I'll sue you. Oh, my God. Would you sue us? No, I'd never. Yeah.

Oh, that's a nice answer. You work in family law, correct? I do. Perfect. We should bring this up with her while she's here, Mitch. What is it? The whole situation between Jenna and I. Normally we have our third wheel Jenna here with us.

Yeah. And her and I, we were talking the other day on the podcast about if she were to embark on motherhood, single mum, she just needed a donor. Whose sperm would she choose, myself or Mitch Cherry? She chose me naturally, Fadan. No, no, not naturally. Naturally she chose me. I don't think naturally.

When I walked in, sorry, Fadan did say, well, Mitch, you're very tall, very handsome to me. So I think Fadan would choose mine in this situation. No one asked, mate. I'm just trying to get someone to take my sperm. No one wants it. So like hypothetically, if Jenna and I were to do that, what would I need to be aware of as the donor, like,

legally going into that? Any red flags? Yeah, well, don't go on the birth certificate if you don't want any involvement in the child's life and, in particular, child support. You're on the birth certificate, you're up for child support immediately. So, you're not a donor, you're a father if you're on the birth certificate. Okay. But then if I'm not on the birth certificate, again,

it's all hypothetical here. Right, it's just boom. But then do I, am I not allowed to meet the kid and stuff? It depends on, and you should really have a deal. Oh, I see. So that's where we'd come see someone like you. Yeah, you could draft documents about this and you can have like a contract about it.

But predominantly your rights come from the birth certificate. So when people have said previously, okay i've got my best friend um a donor and they go on the birth certificate and then later in life that person says you know what i think i missed out like the hard yards they missed all the baby stuff the kids all of a sudden fun can communicate playing soccer but oh i want to be involved in this kid's life and they can enforce their rights why because they're on the certificate oh so you've had cases like that where originally they agreed, oh, I'll be a hands-off dad but then change their mind later. Yeah.

Right. And it's really tough on the mother because that wasn't the deal. The deal was you're a sperm donor. You didn't pay child support all those years. You weren't involved in the hard slog and yet you come back later. But in terms of the child, the child has a right to know both of their parents and the court would look at it from that perspective. So if you're not on the birth certificate, you're not a father, you're not a parent.

You're just a donor. So you can deal with all that, Mitchell. I'd rather not be involved. I'll just be a godfather. You're not involved. It's heavy stuff. Yeah, I'll be a fun uncle. I'm about to become an uncle in real life.

And then also, I've got my hopes set on being asked to be godfather. Oh, the godfather. Yeah, the godfather. Is that a legal binding name? No, it's not. Oh, I thought it was Is that a legal binding name? No, it's not. Oh, I thought it was. I didn't think so. No, it's not a legal thing.

It's more a traditional thing. It might even be a religious thing. Religious thing. Yeah, okay. I just like the title. Yeah. I like titles. It makes me feel very fancy.

It's a cool title. It is a very cool title. I have to point out, Fadan, the fit is fitting. You've got the Gucci headband. I love. Oh, you love. Yes. It is cool.

Thank you. I think I saw you buy that on TikTok a couple months ago. You may have. And of course, I've never worn these before. I'm wearing my Jimmy Choos for the first time. They're Jimmy Choos. I thought they were Jimmy Choos. They're red and they're sparkly. They're like Wizard of Oz. They're like Dorothy. They're so cute. Where do you get your fashion? Who's your fashion inspo? Like if you were to say there's someone that you look at and go, that's who I want to dress like. Is there someone out there? No, I'm not that person. Really? No, I'm not that person. Really? No, I call myself the original dag because I will put things that don't go together and I will just buy whatever I like and whether or not the colours match.

And I'm always getting feedback on TikTok for darn, that top doesn't go with that jacket. For darn, you're mixing the greens, that sort of thing. Yeah. And I'm like, okay, whatever I like. People really feel like they know you on TikTok. Do you get stopped in the street now all the time? People ask me about those. Shopping centres, I do.

I get that all the time. You know, we actually had Gina Liano on the podcast recently. She works in family law too and she told us that often in like the courtroom environment people in the children's court will ask for selfies and she'll have to be like, not now guys, I can't take a photo in court. Do you get recognised in like the work environment now that you're on TikTok?

I do but most people are really respectful and don't say anything until after the case is over. So I've had like the judge's associate come in and say, like after the case is over, we're packing up the bags at the bar table in the courtroom. Oh, for God, I'm a big fan. And if the client's there, they're like, oh, I feel like the court's on my side. Oh my God. That was my next question. Do you think it helps or hinders your business? Because I don't know, if I was watching TikTok, scrolling, watching all these ridiculous videos, then my family lawyer came up. I don't know if I'd go, oh, I love that or I hate that. Yeah, it's interesting. I think for the most part, I think it's a good thing. Yeah, I was going to say, surely you'd get more people trying to book you. Yeah, because the expertise is there. They know that I'll fight for you. And like not all

lawyers are the same. Somebody can look like a lawyer. Let's say they're a white, older male who looks like they're really intelligent. They wear glasses. They look like they're really intelligent. That's sort of what most people sort of figure a lawyer looks like. Classic lawyer but baggy suit. Yeah, like that guy who has all these books behind him may look really intelligent. But let's say he was a teacher for 30 years, became a lawyer later in life,

is only a five-year lawyer, but the client has no idea. Goes to see the guy who looks really smart and yet not that great lawyer, actually shit lawyer. And when people, like I'm on North Shore Mums, and in there when people say, oh, I'm looking for a lawyer, blah, blah, blah, and then people post in the comments and they post people who I know are really, really bad, like shit lawyers.

And I feel like they're their friends, their family, their uncle, whatever. Go and see whoever. And it's a really bad referral because I know that lawyer is really bad and I'll say nothing. It's not my place. But what is better is I used so-and-so. Always get a referral when a client has used you because then, you know, they did a good thing because they're referring you on because they actually

did a good service. And I get lots of client referrals and people on TikTok say in my comments, oh, yeah, I used Fadan and she was great or whatever. Yeah. It builds a little bit of confidence, I think. Now, what is going on with this cat and dog situation? Because I was screaming at my phone.

Hold on, fill me in, what? Okay, Fadan, great TikTok presence. Life is on lock. She's got the Saturday play today. Got the gorgeous two children. And then I see you going, I think I might get a dog. And then I might get a cat. I'm thinking, Fadan, aren't you going to drive yourself insane?

Why are you doing this to yourself? And now you've got them. Yeah, I got a puppy and a kitten. Haven't you got enough on your platter as it is? I know. Well, fuck it. She can afford it. It's true. It's a lot. Yeah. I don't know if I thought that through, but we're getting through it day by day. How's it going? Is it all right? Well, the puppy toilet training is difficult. The cat is fine because cat has a good litter situation. They're very intelligent. Mitch is a cat.

I agree. They just instinctively know where to shit. It's amazing. It's so great. So the cat has it, gets it. The puppy, not so much. What kind of dog? Cavalier.

Oh, gorgeous. I've got a Cavoodle. Very cute. Do they get along? No. But they play. Like they fight all the time. Play, fight.

But the dog will bite the cat's ears, bite the tail, jump on the cat. But the cat will, you know, get the dog in a headlock. Good. I'm team cat. Yeah. Are you team cat? Yeah. In this situation, biting a reed, that's just rude.

Yeah, yeah. They fight a lot. Now, we need to get you to do an Is It Just Me of your own. You've got an idiom. But before we do, I want to ask about the Mr. Fadana of it all. The internet is obsessed with trying to find your husband. Oh, fuck. I don't get it.

Leave him alone. Yeah, yeah. And he's not interested. Like, he trying to find your husband. I don't get it. Leave him alone. And he's not, he just is not phased. Not interested in social media. Hates TikTok. Doesn't even watch my TikToks. Just thinks that the drama is ridiculous and he's not interested. And I said to him, because you're not participating and I want to do sometimes the couple trends

and I want to get him involved. Nah, not interested. There's a mystery. Don't you just want to post a photo to go, here he is, shut the fuck up? No. You've come this far keeping a mystery. He will never compromise his integrity that way because he's not a believer in social media and a private person at heart. Does that give you a bit of freedom to potentially talk shit about him on TikTok

if you know he's not going to watch? People will tell him. Yeah, I have thought about that. Is it just me? You can follow the show online. Just search Couple of Mitches. If you don't, you're a dickhead. Well, Fadan, I can't believe this is your first podcast.

Are you feeling comfortable? Are you feeling relaxed? I am, yes, having a great time. Yeah, good. Well, should we get Fadan's idjim? Yes, we wanted you to bring an is it just me of your own. What are you thinking? Have you got one prepared? Well, there's a a great time. Yeah, good. Well, should we get Fadan's idjim? Yes. We wanted you to bring an Is It Just Me of your own. What are you thinking? Have you got one prepared?

Well, there's a lot of pressure. I thought about a couple of things. I've got a couple of ideas because I couldn't decide which one. So I'll tell you the first one that comes to mind. Okay, we'll do the first one. If it tanks, we can just do another one. Which, by the way, no pressure. They tank all the time.

If it's shit, I'd tell Cherry. That sucked. Fadan, I think last week I did an Is It Just Me that I've done three times. Yeah. Oh, really? We've been doing this show so long. It's nearly been five years. I forget that I've had the thought and I bring it back up.

Mitch is like, you said that four years ago. Oh, dear. You've got to be kidding me. Nothing changes around here. So, all right. Well, Bradley, our musician, will count you in. You'll hear Is It Just Me. Okay.

And then you finish the sentence. And we'll just rattle them all off. We'll go through them all. Oh, brilliant. Okay. Yeah, right. Let's go. Bradley.

Is it just me or? Should we have learned how to change a tyre in school? Oh, yeah. That would have been a far more useful skill than algebra. Yeah, I agree. I had one of those like dodge driving lessons in high school. They taught you how to go around cones and things. Did you? You were in the car? As part of high school. Yeah, an you how to go around cones and things. Did you?

You were in the car? As part of high school. Yeah, an invasive, what's it called? Were you private or public? Public. I'm surprised their insurance would cover that. Really? Yeah, I don't think they cared about us, to be honest.

We were doing some dodgy shit. But I was the passenger and they went around cones. This is how you get away in a skid. Oh, how boring if you're the passenger. Yeah, you don't drive. But I'm like, God, you wouldn't have had a licence? No, God no. Wait, so do you think, would you prefer to have known in school?

Well, when I watch American TV and you see them doing driver's ed and they're learning how to drive a car and they're learning skills associated with the car and I assume it's how to change a tyre. Do they actually do that in America? Yes. As part of school? Yes. Oh, well then fuck, let's just copy paste the curriculum

and do it here. That'd be great. No, I don't in America. Yes. As part of school. Yes. Oh, well then fuck, let's just copy paste the curriculum and do it here. That'd be great. No, I don't want America to curriculum. American school isn't perfect by any means. Have you ever been caught in a pinch though, either of you, where you've had to change a tyre? It's handy to know. No, I couldn't do it.

I'm too pretty for that. I just call NRMA. I'm not going to touch all that filth on the tyres. I just call NRMA and then you have to wait an hour or whatever or call hubby and – See, waiting for the NRMA shit, that to me, for whatever reason, feels like a waste of time. I'm just like, I'm going to pop the spare on.

I'm on the go. I'm moving. I only ever drive my car when I've got errands to do. And so I'm like, I'm not going to let that slow me down. I'm changing the tyre. Off we go. Do you have the spare tyre? So I used – here's my first world problem.

I used to have a Mercedes and in the boot, when I got my flat tyre and opened it, there's no spare. They have the goop. Do I used – here's my first world problem. I used to have a Mercedes and in the boot when I got my flat tyre and opened it, there's no spare. They have the goop. Do you know about the goop? What's the goop? Oh, is that like you patch it up? No. Well, maybe it's like a patch.

But, yeah, they put something instead on the tyre. We call it the goop. I don't know what the real technical – And it stops the hole. Yeah, they basically plug the hole and you ride around on the tyre. Wow. Rather than a spare. I wouldn't trust that.

So they just got like this goop. And I'm like, where's the spare note? And I'm like, this car costs an exorbitant amount of money and you didn't give me a spare. Should have gotten an Astra for done. Yeah, my house has got a spare for done. I've traded cars now. But yeah.

Yeah, okay. They don't always come with a spare. No. Okay, good. I'll just do another one. So neither of you know how to change a tyre at all? No, I could. It's very intuitive.

I think a jack's involved. That's all I can tell you. Oh, the tricky part for So neither of you know how to change a tyre at all? No, I could. It's very intuitive. I think a jack's involved. That's all I can tell you. Oh, the tricky part for me, because I've had to change my tyre an embarrassing amount of times. I always clip the gutter like a grandma. The hardest part is finding the jack points. You can't just jack it up at any point. You have to like finger under the car and find the right slot to put the jack in.

I'm used to that. Neither of you give a fuck about this, do you? No, I'm used to that. I was going to say, I've plugged many a hole, but it's got nothing to do with changing a tie, Fadan. All right, I can see Fadan's phone. She's got notes. Oh, you've got a few. This is the most prepared.

Shit, let's hear the next one. Bradley, don't go away, mate. Okay, my next one is... Is it just me or... Does Greek yogurt make every dinner taste better? Oh, yes. Next. No, I agree.

I fucking agree. Not on its own. You can't just pop Greek yogurt on a chicken breast. And it's not all Greek yogurt is created equal. I'm a Farmers Union fan. It's creamy. It's delicious. Is that the square tub?

Like it's kind of a square big tub? Yeah, it's square rectangle. It's not like a round shabani. It's a rectangle. No, it's not round. It's rectangle. And it's just so creamy and you can have it with everything, especially lamb.

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah, but I don't know if you can put it on anything. I like a bit of lemon or a bit of like, you put a bit of mint or. Yeah, well, salt, olive oil, lemon. That's all you need. They're staples. I pop a bit of bloody yogurt on everything.

Bit of pepper in there, bit of garlic. I use it in lieu of mayonnaise, basically, because I actually hate fucking vegetables, but apparently you're supposed to eat them for your health. Yeah. And so I just pop a dollop of yogurt on pretty much everything. Fadana, I've just got a Ninja Creamy. Are you on the Ninja Creamy side of TikTok?

I know what a Ninja is. Yeah, Ninja, you've got the air fryers. I've seen that. Yeah, and I know they do a blender, and I know they do an outdoor oven, like a barbecue thing. Yes, and they also have a Creamy, which is you put liquids in a tub, you freeze it, then it makes it into ice cream. Oh, right.

Yeah, if you get on that side. Are they paying you, mate? What's going on? They're actually fucking not. And I really need to talk to Mr Ninja because I should be making bank offers. Anyway, you put yogurt and honey and a bit of cinnamon in a pot, freeze it, and then you've got the best locale ice cream ever. It really does sound like an ad.

Let's move on. Yeah, I was going to say, why don't you talk about it? freeze it and then you've got the best locale ice cream ever um it really does sound like an ad let's move on yeah i was gonna say why was he talking about it i thought for darn given your side of tiktok you'd be on ninja creamy talk no because i'm not ice cream person like ninja did approach me and said pick whatever you like as many as you like things off our website give the mitch's number and i was like oh and they didn't give me a budget i'm like is there a budget they don't give me a budget how many things do i pick so I picked the big Ninja because I had the two-draw one. Picked the big Ninja. The air fryer.

Yeah. So I upgraded my air fryer. And then I picked the outdoor barbecue. Oh, they've got an outdoor barbecue? Yeah, it's like a barbecue. I thought they just did neutral ones. I didn't know that it's a, like you've got to plug it in and you can only use it outdoors.

I thought it was a barbecue you can use indoors. Oh, right. For my dinners. But then when I read the instructions, it's like, do not use indoors. And I'm like, oh, no. Shit. What are they going to do with your house, your rules? Yeah.

Yeah. Well, I'm a little worried about fires. But I thought about it. That makes one of us. But I don't eat ice cream, so I would never have. Well, shit. Can we give me that contact off when we finish the show? Yeah.

I'll hook you up. I'm doing a lot of free fucking PR for Bridget. Yeah, yeah. It took me like two years, but finally they got the hint. Okay, let's do another one. She's got plenty. Okay, Bradley, hit us again. Is it just me or Should we be able to use emojis

in everyday life in particular when you're writing correspondence or writing letters and I just want to use an emoji oh I thought you meant everyday life is in like we gesticulate we try and replicate the emoji in conversations ourselves with the crying with laughter emoji just in real life what you want to say is exactly an emoji yes no no you're right you could just hold up the sign that had the emoji there or you know magically it would appear or when I'm writing legal letters to the other side

sometimes I want to put an emoji in there. Or when the client, like I have this client who we call the other side, B1 and B2, because they just write really dumb things. And I just want to send him the banana emojis. But I don't want to write B1 and B2, so I just want to send him the banana emoji when they write really dumb things. I definitely do put emojis in my emails, but perhaps there's less at stake for me than working in law.

But do you do that by pushing Windows dot? On the Mac it's like Control Command Spacebar or something. So you know the little code. Yeah. I've only recently discovered that you could do that. You can. With the Windows dot. And so what's stopping you now that you know how?

Carolina, there's only like 10 emojis. I want all of them. I want the face palm. Oh, wait, you're on Windows? Yeah. Yeah, right. You've only like 10 emojis. I want all of them. I want the face palm. Oh, wait, you're on Windows? Yeah. Yeah, right. You've got the ugly emojis. I've never considered if I put an emoji in an email,

how will that translate on someone's PC? Oh, yeah. I think they're those ugly Android emojis. They look the same, but they're gross. That's true. Fadan, you also could not. If I was in a court of law and someone was suing me and then it comes up with Mitchell Turi with like a little shuckers emoji,

like you're being served by Fadan with a little finger up emoji. But this isn't – no, I don't buy this. I reckon you should sign off your emails with Fadan and then the nail polish emoji. Oh, yeah. That's like fancy, you know. Oh, yeah, wouldn't that be right? Or lemons.

What emoji encapsulates Fadan, do you think? Oh, it's got a bit of lemon. Yeah. Fadan's got lemon earrings on your phone case. I'm all about lemons. So, yeah, it's got a bit of lemon. Yeah. Fadan's got lemon earrings on your phone case. I'm all about lemons. So, yeah, it's just a bit of a phase. But every time anyone sees lemons anywhere, I get tagged like so much. Lemons, yeah.

Like Spotlight, Reject Shop, they've been having lemon stuff, TJ Maxx, for a long time. And people think that I don't already know, so I'll get like a hundred messages telling me, there's dinnerware at Spotlight with lemons. Did you see that big lemon on TikTok that that woman had grown? And it looked like a, it was huge. It was like this big. Yes. And then she cut it in half. Yes. And it was, how big was it? It was like this big, but it was a word for it. Yeah. It was a wild lemon and it just had different channels. Like the size of a basketball. Yes. Yeah. It was, yeah, probably. I'm just trying to remind you that you're on a podcast. You're using your hands

going this big. I know. I've made a career out of an audio medium, Fadan, and I never learned that people can't see me. And it's a travesty because I'm very gorgeous, as Fadan said. And they cut it in half and it looks like a brain. And yeah. Yeah, I was tagged a lot in that video. Yes, all over it. Do you have one more? Do one more, Egym, I think. How many more have you got? Oh, I think I've got one more. Oh, sweet. Oh, we may as well. We've come this far.

Come on. Alright, Bradley, off we go. Is it just me or... Is the news that they're making a new Legally Blonde, I think it's a series, the best news ever? Oh. Just you. We love Legally Blonde. We love Elle Woods.

Yeah. No, maybe it's a girl thing. I've not seen it. Well, we're very gay. I've never seen Legally Blonde. How could you have never seen it? I've never seen it. Oh, you're missing out. I've seen it, but sometimes I feel like turning Legally Blonde. How could you have never seen it? I've never seen it. Oh, you're missing out.

I've seen it, but sometimes I feel like turning shit into a series, it just ruins it, you know. You reckon? Like sometimes sequels can really suck. Sequels do. Legally Blonde 2 was shithouse. Was it? Very bad.

Don't do it. Sometimes the sequels of things are better than the original. Like Shrek 2, so much better than Shrek 1. No, I disagree. Really? I don't think the series of Legally Blonde could possibly be better than the movie. But what if her daughter plays Elle Woods, the young Elle? You know how like Reese Witherspoon and her daughter Ava look the same?

Yeah. It's like when she was in high school. See, they did that with Grease. It was like the rise of the pink ladies. Oh, did they? I don't care about some clique in a high school before the main characters turn up. I don't care about the history. But it's also very you, Fadan.

Like, it's lawyer, right? Yes. It's the lawyer life. That's true. It's lawyer that dresses well. It's literally you. It's inspiring. It's who you are.

That's your celeb lookalike. You can be Elle Woods. Okay. I'll take it. Oh, my God. Fadan, the Australian Elle Woods. They're practically twins. Basically, yeah.

Okay. Well, great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great.

Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great.

Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great.

Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. Great. great idjams, Fadan. Thank you. You were brilliant. Now, before we let you go, very important question for you. Mitchell, I don't think you can ask Fadan. Why not?

We ask every guest. She's a lawyer and she holds herself with such esteem. You're very regal. I just feel like we should skip it with Fadan. This question, it's too vulgar. Oh, vulgar. Are you okay? Now that you mention it, Cherry, I've actually noticed that you've not sworn once this whole podcast

and I've been swearing like a fucking shearer on hot days. Oh, I swear all the time. It must be just the environment. Okay, do you want to say your favourite swear word? Fuck. Oh. It's got to be because I say the fuck it, I can afford it. It just comes out all the time.

I do cuss a little. That sounds great out of your mouth. Fuck. Yeah, I say it like and sometimes because when i talk to clients i'll have to refrain depending on the client yes um if they came from tiktok they know that i swear but sometimes when i talk to the other side i'll be like you could have been such a bitch face you know like calm the fuck down yes well how do you feel am i allowed to ask this question cheer is trying to veto it no i'm not trying to veto it. I didn't realise you had such a potty mouth.

So, yeah, ask away. Fuck it. Yeah, go on. So, we do this thing with every guest where we ask them to contribute to our list of things better than drugs and dick. The reason we do that, I wish our idiots could see our face when I said that. The reason we do that, it's not as putrid as it sounds. It's because we don't want our young listeners who might be in a phase in life where they're becoming a bit obsessed with partying and boys and what have you,

we don't want them to believe that that's all there is to life. There's little things you can appreciate, like the crunch of a good autumn leaf under your shoes, shit like that. I'll find some examples actually. She's just stunned in silence. Oh, is it time for me? I was waiting for you to finish. No, you can say whatever you want.

I'm finding some examples. Well, I've got ideas. Oh, good. I told you for you to finish. No, you can say whatever you want. I'm finding some examples. Well, I've got ideas. Oh, good. I told you you should be on board. All right, these are the ideas. Wait, quickly, did you have a period in your youth of the drugs and the dick and you were a naughty girl? Oh, that's more inappropriate than what I asked. It was.

Well, if you've read my book, you'd know. Oh. I did send you a copy of my book, Mitch. A signed copy? Yes. I have the book. Did you read the book? In my book.

I know it's long. I did not read the full thing. No. I'm sorry. I apologise. But. Did you read the book? I know it's long. I did not read the full thing. No. I'm sorry. I apologise. But I thought it was fiction. No, this is the real life for darn dating story. Get out.

From when I had 51 first dates and also the second dates, the third dates, et cetera. It talks about my whole sex life, everything. Even when I knew this, Chirina, I wasn't sent a fucking signed book. 31 to 33, I think the years are. So they were your naughty years, 31 to 33? Well, they were when it was documented. In my 20s, I was more party.

But 30s was like, you know, we're on a husband hunt here. So 20s was, you know, when I was in my 20s, I was broke as fuck. Even though I was a lawyer, struggling. And when you're a uni student, like early 20s, really, really poor. That's where the green bags come in handy, right? Yeah, yeah. Pretty Alexia makes you sexier. And also there is something about a law boy.

Like they're hot. In your uni days, were there some hot uni, cute uni boys? Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah. Absolutely. So some examples of things better than drugs and dick that our other guests have given us. Yep.

Chalk-coated sultanas, according to Tim Abbott. When you haven't started the chalk top before the movie, Ruben Kay said that one. Rhys Nicholson said weighted anxiety blankets. Angela Bishop said a water bed. Yep. Lara Jean Marshall from the Saddle Club said oozing lava cakes are better than drugs and dick.

And you can quote her on that. Yeah, she's always said that. What have you got for us? A little pleasure in life for Darn? Okay, this is a little out there. Green crunchy plums with salt. That is out there. There's a lot to take in.

Green plums, that's a thing? Yeah, when they're not ripe. Oh, that'll give you a tummy ache. No, everyone says that, man, no. Really? So I'm just popping it on the list. I could have those. It's only very, very niche before they get ripe,

so it might happen for maybe four weeks a year. I think I prefer dick than green crunchy plums with salt. No, green crunchy plums, I'm telling you. And with salt. With salt, oh, my God, yes. That's that trend online. Everyone's eating the rawums with salt. No, green crunchy plums, I'm telling you. And with salt. With salt, oh my God, yes. That's that trend online. Everyone's eating the raw almonds with salt. Have you seen that?

Yeah, and I went to the fruit shop and asked, not in season. Really? But I'm waiting. That'd be bitter, wouldn't it? I'm not sure. I hear that crunch and jeez, I just want to try it. It's so good, I'm with you. It's so satisfying.

Do you want to add Greek yogurt to that as well or nah? Not with the plums, no. Also, Greek yogurt doesn't make everything better. No, but I've never tried it. Like it might make it better. Try everything once. I wouldn't think to put salt with the plums. So, hey, can't hurt to experiment.

Apple, green crunchy apple with salt also works. Yeah. Granny Smith apple with salt. Oh, I could fuck with that actually. That sounds amazing. Haven't you had a green apple martini when it's got a bit of a green apple or a margarita? It goes with it. Yeah, it's really good.

I don't like martinis in general because of the salt. Oh, really? Yeah. I adore salt, make it. Yeah, it's really good. I don't like martinis in general because of the salt. Oh, really? Yeah. I adore salt, make no mistake, but not on a drink. My favourite drink, I feel like you can connect on this, Fadan, is a really, really dirty gin martini. Yeah, I don't mind it. Define dirty.

Like, it's olive brine. Three olives, a good shot of olive brine, just gin, vermouth, that's it. Cold. And it hits you straight. I can still only afford goons. Yeah, all right. Well, fuck it, I can afford it. As can Fadan. All right, more, more vermouth, that's it. Cold. I can still only afford goons. Yeah, all right. Well, fuck it. I can afford them.

As can Fadan. All right, more, more, more, more. This is good. What else do you have? Well, I was going to say something boring like coffee. Oh, boring. No, yeah, that is boring. No, that is better than drugs and dick.

No, it's not. It's the most addicted to drugs I've had in my whole life. In the morning, yes, true. I'm still hooked on coffee. True. Okay. Can I shower? Yeah, that's good.

A burning hot shower. Are you a bath girl? No. Okay. Hot shower? Yeah, that's good. A burning hot shower. Are you a bath girl? No, never. Why not? And I have lots of bath paraphernalia, but I don't really. Send them my way, darling. And because I bath the kids, it's like a chore, man. I see.

I do love a bath. Mine's not quite big enough for me. And I'm not a large person. No. Yeah, it's very uncomfy. Yeah, I don't really fit in baths. Have you ever tried to have sex in a bath? No.

Horrific. Yeah, it's really hard. It needss. Have you ever tried to have sex in a bath? No. Horrific. Yeah, it's really hard. It needs to be big. It's really hard. It's hard and it's big. And it's difficult. Hard and it's big. I mean, sign me up.

No, yeah, not really. Send me those photos. The bath needs to be big enough. Uh-huh. There's a water problem. Yep. You think water. Shower, sex, bath.

Yeah, yeah. It sounds hot. No, not hot. It sounds like it's going to work. No. But it doesn't. It almost does the opposite, doesn't it? Yeah. It doesn't sound like it's going to work. But it doesn't. It almost does the opposite, doesn't it? It doesn't sound like it's going to work at all.

Well, I like the idea of it because you see it on like the romanticising on TV, the bubble baths and you're getting in the bath together. It sounds kind of hot and sexy. But then when you're in the bath together, it's kind of awkward. Yeah, it does the opposite completely. All right. Well, Fadan, that was an absolute pleasure having you. Thank you.

It's been so much fun. I can't believe we took your podcast virginity. Yes, indeed. I'll always remember this moment. You do. I hope. Were we gentle? Was it okay?

You enjoyed it? Yeah, yeah, it was perfect. You'll remember it? Yay, I'm glad. Well, you look gorgeous. Thank you. We had people going, oh, Fadan. I don't know, Fadan, Fadan.

I'm so glad we had you on. I really am. Who was saying that? There was a Reddit. Did you not see the Reddit thread about this? I don't read Reddit. Oh, well. Not good for my mental health. I agree. She about this? I don't read Reddit. Not good for my mental health. I agree.

She's like, I don't read Reddit anymore. No, I don't read it. Sometimes people in the comments send me to Reddit. And I'm like, out of curiosity, I'd go and look and think, those bitches. So I don't now. Let them. Someone sent me a screenshot and they said, Fadan's appearing on a podcast. I went, what podcast?

They went, is it just me? By all appearances, it looks very loose. Yeah, they did. So while we're at it, hi,? They went, is it just me? By all appearances, it looks very loose. Yeah, they did. So while we're at it, hi, Reddit. Hi, Reddit. Hi, Reddit. Hi, Fadan. What are your fans called?

Well, the fans are Fadan Talk fans, but the trolls are the trolls. Yeah, yeah, no. Yeah, they're all. We call our listeners idiots. Isn't that beautiful? Oh, charming. Say hi to the idiots. Hi, Reddit idiot.

Yeah, those in the basement who have never the idiots. Hi, Reddit idiot. Yeah, those in the basement who have never been kissed. Yes, yeah, that's it. Oh, they'll hate you now. They'll come for you. Yeah, it's all right. She doesn't seem to care about that shit. You're very no bullshit.

That's what I like. Because they're in the basement or they're the troll, the faceless, nameless person where I'm me with my fabulous life. They've been taught. What are they going to do? It doesn't faze me. To be someone who's successful, you're going to have the jealous people, the haters. They're they going to do? It doesn't faze me. To be someone who's successful, you're going to have the jealous people,

the haters. They're not going to be happy for your success. Never. It's all right. Don't be happy for me. It's fine. I'm not happy for you. I don't know you.

I don't care about you. Good luck. If it brings you joy, go ahead. She lives to cut another cucumber for another day. I do. With a paring knife and a thumb and a platter. It's Fadan. Thanks for coming on the show.

Thank you so much. I've had so much fun. Thanks for coming. Is it just me? A podcast by a thumb and a platter. It's Fadan. Thanks for coming on the show. Thank you so much. I've had so much fun. Thanks for coming. Is it just me? A podcast by a couple of mitches. Make sure you've hit follow on your podcast app.