Is She Ok? - A Marathon, Mum Life & Mr. Big: Sophie Runs, Chans Juggles, and SATC Still Delivers

Episode Date: April 4, 2025

After a short hiatus, the girls are back!This week the girls are having a bestie catch up, with some pretty big life events having taken place over the last few weeks!Follow us on Instagram:@IsSheOKpodcast@sophiegoorwich@csahni

Hi everyone and welcome to the Is She OK? podcast. I'm Chance and I'm Sophie and we're here to unpack life's ups and downs and all the in-betweens, having the conversations every woman's thinking about but rarely says out loud. Every week we'll chat about topics that really matter, aiming to answer the question we all ask ourselves. Is she OK? Hi, how are you? I'm good. So how are you doing? I'm good. Thank you. And we have had a little hiatus due to not trying to do it all. As we said in the last episode 17 million weeks ago. And sometimes you just can't do it all and that is okay. So I love that we've given ourselves a little bit of grace but we have jumped back on that pony and we are here today.

How are you? What is going on in the world of Charney? So I'm actually really good. I've entered this phase of motherhood. Now I don't know if you can see this clearly, but this is where your hair starts regrowing where it fell out. So, but it's now got to the length where there's no way for me to hide it. Like it's just there. And so it's for those who can't see it, it's basically a halo of frizz that surrounds your head at all times. So I reached that point, but at least the hair is growing. So that's, I mean, like I said, at least it's growing, so that's fine. And then in other news, my son has started nursery. So he just had his first full week of settling in. And it's quite a significant moment, I think,

in any new parent's life. I've sent him to nursery really early, so I don't go back till the end of May to work. But I wanted to have two full months where I could fully focus on settling him in. And yeah, just to feel secure so that I'm not suddenly going back to work and having this big emotional thing that I'm also going through at the same time. And I have to say, this may all change in the coming weeks, but he absolutely smashed it. Like from day one, he just marched off, well, scuttled off. And just, just by honestly, like I was so surprised at how confidently he just took to it. I obviously cried, I cried a lot on the first day. And then I just didn't cry after that, which was a surprise because, well you know, he's just great. Yeah and the play seemed good and all you want as a parent

is to know someone else is going to look after your kid and they're safe and he was coming home happy and all of that kind of stuff. So yeah, so week one is done and now you know he'll go for a little bit longer every day but also I had time back to myself. Time back where I wasn't having to cook for him or wash dishes or you know, all of that. But it's like you can now enjoy maternity leave a little bit. For the last like five minutes of maternity leave I can actually enjoy it. But your words ring true in my head, which is if you want to lose weight, you have to put the work in. And so now that he's going and I'm actually getting time to myself, I have joined a gym. I am words we didn't think. I know, I know. I am reviewing my nutrition. I am just taking

time for myself so that when I go back to work, I can just feel really confident and good about myself. So yeah, but I also feel like highlights like a really massive thing like jokingly at the start, I said about like, us giving ourselves a bit of grace and like, but I truly believe as I've got older, like, there are some people that can do it all and whoopty do for them, I personally am not one of them. Um, like I think there are seasons for everything and it's not necessarily like when it comes to fat loss, like it's not necessarily about like just letting yourself go and being like, well, I can't do, I can't prioritize it fully. So I'm just going to like eat ice cream all day, but about being realistic and going, I can either stress that I'm not able to fully commit to this right now Or I can do bits and do what I can and now that you've got time and a bit more energy and you're not having to carry and watch a baby all the time like you can sit down and

Plan your own meals and like I can't such an important Point and like you will be much better about trying to do it this way rather than trying to do it while he's at home all the time and it just picks up and yeah no good for you. Yeah because I would have been setting myself up to fail yes that's the bottom line I would have been trying to do something that half-assed and just just failed constantly so I was like you know what once I've got the actual headspace, because this does need brain power, as well as physical power, you need to be able to think about things as well as do them. So yeah, I feel I'm feeling really good. You know, everything is is moving in a positive direction. And I know with parenthood, it

goes up and down. I'm in an up bit at the moment. So I'm just really trying to be present and enjoy it as much as possible. It's good. And I watched Sex and the City for the first time, Sophie. Right. So I have been with you for like, what, 20 odd years? Like, it's been a while and I, you know, we share a lot and we, you know, have experienced and gone through many things together. I think it was last week, you messaged me saying that you're watching it for the first time. When I say, I, my response was, I'm shook. Like, I literally, it struck me in my tracks. I was like, I do not know this woman. Who is she? Our whole friendship has been a lie. Like of all the people. I know.

I know that I would have been like, yeah, maybe she hasn't watched it. Your name wouldn't have been thrown in the ring. I know, I know. And a lot of people were shocked. I'm just, I'm shook. And the reason Sophie was so shocked by this is because my entire 20s was like every single episode of Sex and the City

You were Sex and the City, this is what I'm warning you Like you weren't even body moving Like I just can't, still I can't get over it I'm like are you sure you didn't like watch it but like maybe you had a like really heavy night and you've hit your head and you've forgotten it, are you sure? Yeah, and I'll tell you something I devoured it in about a week. I watched every single episode and every single theory in about a week. And look, yes, there are some bits that are problematic with any of these shows that were created in the, I don't know, early 2000s, but-

It's great. Every single episode I was like, yes, I remember feeling like that. I did that. I wanted to do that. You know, it's rings so true to this day when it comes to dating in a woman's life. Obviously now it's different because you've got, you know, you've got apps and that just wasn't really covered in that experience. That wasn't our experience. So like, it's really easy. Like I think so, like in the last kind of like six months or a year, there's been, I think because it got put on Netflix, so there's this whole new generation that started watching it and they're like,

ew, what is this? Like it's so outdated. Yeah. And then like, no, no, there was a time where like vibrators were like controversial. And that's kind of like, and I think also like, I love the, like the different characters because I think there's a little bit of class and like maybe as I love the, like the different characters because I think there's

a little bit of class and like maybe as we get older, like we transition through all like personalities and like I, I love it. I think it's great. I just, I think it was so revolutionary. Like I remember when it came, when it was first shown on like English TV, and it was on at like 10 or 11 o'clock at night. And I'd like stay up and watch it but it was almost like watching like porn on your like, yeah, like and if I heard someone like my one of my parents coming down the stairs, I turn it over. Like a what would they be hearing but like chances are like, you know, someone would come downstairs and pop their head and I was like, what if it's a scene with Samantha? And then it's just like, how do I explain this? And it was, it was like, yeah, like

something naughty. And yeah, I just think like, I think that the wild has come a long way since then. But I just think it's great. It was so nostalgic. And then obviously, after it finished, I was like, Oh, no, I've got a gap in my life now. What do I fill it with? So I decided to watch and just like that, which is the follow up to Sex and the City where they're all in their 50s. Oh, my God, it's horrific. It's awful. Don't just don't ever bother watching it. It's so unnecessary. They have tried to shoehorn every sort of modern situation that you can encompass when it comes to diversity into this one theory. I was going to say, is it one of those things where they're like, we're really sorry for any lack of diversity and incorrectness in the first one, which was kind of part of its charm in some way. Yeah. And we're now going to try and rectify that by having like, every yeah,

I mean, like, and that's just a car crash, because it comes really like cliche. Yeah, it's done in such a terrible way. And Miranda, Miranda, who was this high powered lawyer character, you know, independent woman in Sex and the City becomes this awful tragedy of a character who's so annoying that I almost gave up on it. I mean, I'm watching it now because it's like watching a car crash where you can't look away. But yeah, yeah, I love the films. I have the films because the films were plated as well. And again, for like, oh my god, they were so like politically incorrect. And I'm like, I mean, yes, parts of them. But like, if you watch them for like, what they are at face value

and spin off of sex in the city, like, yeah, I just think it's one of those things where like the original is always the best. And sometimes we just leave that be. Leave well alone. Anyway, enough about me experiencing Sex in the City. Sophie, you have been up to something very exciting recently that you kept a big fat secret. What's that chance? Did you just jet off to bloody Spain? Right, so I assume we're talking about the little run that I did. So basically I ran a marathon like two weeks ago now, it was my first one and I thought if I'm gonna

do it, I'm gonna do it in a nice location. And number one, like I've always wanted to do the London Marathon, but getting into it is just like near impossible. If you run for a charity, you've got to raise like two and a half grand and obviously that doesn't go well with not wanting to tell anyone that you're doing it. You can't really raise like three grand in secret. So essentially, and you probably know this knowing me as you do, like I am very much someone that I like to make decisions and do things and then I will tell people after. That's just how I am. It takes away all the pressure. I know myself well enough to know like I'm not someone that you'd go shopping with. And I'd be

trying stuff on and be like, what do you think about this? She let me out of it. Like, I just, I don't care. And if I want to do something or wear something, and it doesn't hurt other people, like that's, I'm very sure of myself in that way. So I've always wanted to do a marathon. And it's just never, it's just never something I've ever prioritised, so it's never happened. So I got into running like a year ago, it was last March, I was like right I'm gonna commit to making running my priority. And the marathon thing was always at the back of my head but it was never like I didn't do it for that reason, I was like I just want to be able to actually be someone that can enjoy running on a regular basis. So then that kind of progressed throughout the year and I was like, do you know what,

I'm actually really enjoying it. And then I was like, right, let's just, I wanna do it from 40 for no one else. And then like, it gives me kind of like a cutoff date. So yeah, I went online and I was like, I can get a space for Barcelona and that sounds great. So I booked it. The lead up to it has been like the worst and I'm going to try and keep this as short as possible, but it's been like a series of unfortunate events ever since I decided to do it. So marathon prep is for a new runner is 20 weeks, like 16 to 20 weeks for any kind of runner you want to give yourself that time to train and progress and everything. So it's a big commitment. So two weeks into my training block was when my back went.

into my training block was when my back went. Having possibly like a disc related issue with your back two weeks into a 20 week block of marathon training is not ideal. So essentially, I couldn't walk for the best part of like three weeks properly. I said to myself, I was like, I said to myself, I was like, if I buy Christmas, I can run a 10k. I will continue with it. Like I will, but my motivation, I'll go ahead with it. So Christmas week came and I was like, screw this, I'm going to go out, I'm going to do the 10k. Did the 10k. I was like, right, I'm committed. However, then it was like the first week of January. And obviously that's kind of all a bit turbulent but came back so my training probably started again the second week of January which gave me nine or 10 weeks for a new run

and it's so like not in like a go me way but like it's just not something you should ever do like it's not advice. But I was like all I can do is tick every box along the way. So I didn't miss a run. I didn't miss a training session. I was doing like all the nutrition side of things myself.

And it was just that thing of like, I will be fine on the day as long as I do everything I need to. And that was enough to mean that like, when it, so then we had like two weeks of snow, so I couldn't ride. So I was having to mean that like, when it, so then we had like two weeks of snow, so I couldn't ride. So I was having to run on a treadmill, which wasn't ideal,

because that makes like, that makes my back pay up. So anyway, it was just this complete, like I can't quite believe it happened. Then the week of the marathon, on the weekend, I broke my phone, which then gave me, so that was on the Saturday or the Sunday. I was flying on the Thursday morning, so that gave me five days.

I don't drive without a car. I was giving a talk for Women's Day on the Saturday. It was a busy week, like to catch up sessions and stuff. So my phone was broken. So I just had to like order a new phone and hope that it arrived by the Wednesday or the Tuesday so I could get it set up for my boarding pass. Then I was in denial on the weekend about the fact that my wisdom tooth was infected so by Tuesday I was sad. So all this was going on and I was like, couldn't tell anyone why it was quite so catastrophic as it was. So I then had to get an emergency appointment on the Tuesday to go to the dentist to get antibiotics for my wisdom tooth, which also then meant that I was still on the antibiotics on the day of the marathon race, which isn't ideal. Also, I have a story to tell you about the antibiotics, but we will have to do that another day. So that happened. Also, my dad

had been scheduled for a surgery that week. So it was just like he's fine and It was just a very high stress and like normally if that would have happened I'd be like, well, I'll come home on the weekend just to like help out but obviously Tells me about this operation. I was like good luck silence and you know, we like I'm just like and I think maybe a bit like hey, well, that's nice of you. Um, anyway, it was just like this perfect shit storm. Then got to Barcelona, I've not had a blister the entire time of my training. There's some wonderful reason I was like, do you know what I'm going to do?

I'm going to wear a pair of trainers travel in that I've never worn before. Oh, God. By the time I got to my Airbnb in Barcelona, I had two massive blisters on my ankles. Also, my calf was playing up so much that I had to cut so before you do like, like essentially like some deload run so they're just like two 30 minute runs like the two days before the marathon. Okay. I was in so much pain with my calf that I was limping. I had to cut those runs short to 20 minutes and 15 minutes. So on the day before I was like, I couldn't actually walk properly. So what did you do? Well, I wasn't even sure I was like, I was texting the only person that knew like the guy that was doing all my coaching. And I was like, I, I'm not gonna know if I can run this until I wake up in the morning and

just hope. So basically spent the day before like with my leg elevated, like just kind of like praying to the leg gods. Anyway, the day comes around magically the calf was like okay to run on. And it was a really amazing experience despite oh my god so it was just like you know a reflection you're like I can't actually believe that it happened and yeah so like it was such a good day and like thankfully like my blisters were like slightly above where like my running trainer was right as an experience it was was just great. Like all the horror stories that you hear about like chafing and like tummy parts and like just like things going wrong and like blisters and losing toenails, like there was none of that. It was just like a really good

experience. And Smash It is just incredible. Well done. You have always been I think for me the epitome of I can't remember what the saying is, but you know, when you say, achieve your goals or work for your goals in private, rather than telling people. So then when you've achieved them, you can you can really show people and I think it's such an amazing way to be because I'm too like, Hi, everyone, I'm doing I want to give you every detail of everything I want to achieve. And I probably won't achieve it. Whereas you're like, quietly going to focus on this, get it done. And that way no outside voices can can impact on this. So honestly, very proud of you. Well, bloody done. I think I felt bad because like I was definitely like emitting your information or like lying to people like basically I crossed the line and like straight away messaged my family and was like just so you know um and their response was my dad was just like I thought you were in your flat was like I'm so sorry you know just like they think you're going to tell your family no like no one knew um yeah well but like I do I just think like in a day and age where like everyone feels the need to overshare and like just kind of and there's like, you know, I

I also think it's a really good example of like Realizing that when you look at people on the internet be it like fitness influencers or like celebrities or whatever it is like You're not you're never getting the whole story No, you're not entitled to the whole story and actually you don't have to do that either like yeah We'll share what they want to share and I'm very much the same and like now I'm obviously like happy to talk about it and tell people yeah Everything like that, but I do think there's a real like, there's something really nice about just doing something for you. And

only you and like not. Yeah, it's like, even little things like if people knew about it, people would be very well meaning and being like, how's your training going? Yeah, yeah. If that's like, tell people then I'd end up being rude. Like, yeah, it's like, yeah, I just think each And I think also there's something about control, like, you know, when we share everything in the moment, you've got no real control of the long term narrative. Whereas what you've done is you've completed this big long thing that's been going on for quite a while. And

at the end of it, then you can reflect and go, right, this is the version of that, that whole story that I want to tell. Whereas if you're sharing it in the moment, you've got no chance of kind of reflecting on any of it and going back and, and, you know, giving that full story. So I think there's something in this about that as well, which is really important. I think it's kind of, I mean, it's obviously not the same thing, but it's, I think like when you hear about celebrities keeping like their pregnancies, stuff like that, and I'm like, I guess it's the same vein. It's like they just want to enjoy it. They don't want to hear people's opinions

on like what you should be doing. And so I just think that like a lot of people could like if you experience that, and yeah, obviously, but I think there's something really special about it and you do it and you're just like, No, I genuinely did that for me. Definitely. Oh, that's so good. Love it. Well done. So yeah, the only other thing that I would maybe we need to discuss it at late today. I've been watching Married at First Sight Australia. Oh my god, I've just started it. Oh my god, right. Well, we'll discuss it next week. Like, anyone listening, go on channel four, catch up, get yourself up to date and we will dive in next week because

it's a great series. I mean, I started it yesterday and my husband fell asleep, I think, because he was just very tired. And I got to the end of the first episode and then you know where they do the previews of the next episode. It took everything in my power to turn it off then so he could catch up today. I wanted to binge watch at least 12 episodes if I could, but I had to stop, put it down. I was like, right, tomorrow, he's going to catch up. And then we're going to really get into this. Yeah. Okay, let's do this next time. Yes, it's a great series. So yeah, today, basically, I think we just kind of wanted to have a bit of a catch up tell people, you know, we are still here. And then I thought we would end with basically I picked up a copy of stylist magazine during the week. And at the back they have something called Five Minute Philosopher. And it's like some just very kind of like short questions that they do with a celebrity. And it's kind of like either a question or like a finish of the sentence. And I actually really like the questions. So I thought I would steal some of them.

Thanks, Stylist. And ask you a couple just to kind of run that through. So what should we go for first? Right, okay. I'm gonna do these two because they are kind of combined. So the first one is, what do you wish you had more of? Now as a parent, time to myself. I think I took it for granted before I had a baby just quite how much time I had to myself and now It's so shockingly limited that in a good way in a bad way actually it's so limited that when I do get it I really fucking enjoy it like you know it could be that moment where he goes to bed obviously I love him and I miss him, but I really relish

Everything what would you say, Soph? What do I wish I had more of? Tropical holidays, beach holidays. Yes. I'm in the sun. Excellent. Yeah, I think that's pretty sad. Good one. Yeah.

Yours is like really deep and like meaningful. I'm on a sunbed, quite frankly. Okay, so then the follow-up question is what do you wish you did less of? Worry. I worry a lot. And I have always worried as a child, my parents often will joke about this. They always say like, we're surprised your blood pressure has never been high because I worry about everything. I'll give you an example.

I can't believe I'm saying this out loud, we have a lovely park near where we live and there's lots of wildlife, lots of ducks, lots of birds, so every time it gets to this time of the year they will build their nests and they start having their babies, right? And there's a pair of swans who've been at this lake for years, so they really get kind of carte blanche, they get to go wherever they want, you know, whatever. Anyway, so we were there the other day, because I go for a walk there every day, and there were these eight tiny ducklings, no parents, okay, tiny ducklings, they're in the pond, and the father swan is aggressively like barging into them, separating them, like, attacking them, in essence. I was stood there and I was watching and I was like, Holy shit.

Where is the where where are the parents? What's gonna happen? Instincts are kicking in. Oh my god. I was so I stood there for so long and I was like, what do what do I do? And the whole journey home? I was like, I was just so stressed about these ducklings. So I went onto the Facebook page of this, this park. Anyone else would have stopped there. But there's a lot of this is where the worry is. I was like, something needs to be done. And you know what, bless the people in this Facebook group because they all replied and they were like,

the father swan, his hormones are wild and the kids have a mum, the ducklings have a mum, but she keeps getting chased off. So today I made my husband and son go there so I could buy duck feed so I could feed these ducklings to look after them because obviously in my head they don't have a mother but Sophie we went there they were there with two parents and they were safe I counted all eight were still there so they do have a mum and a dad. Not all heroes wear capes. No but the amount I've worried about those ducklings for the last 24 hours is shocking. It's absolutely ridiculous actually. And that's one of maybe 10,000 things I'll worry about in a day. So that's, that's my answer. Worrying.

That's very sweet. I wish I could believe it. What's yours? What did you wish you did less of? I wish I did less of... I don't know. You might have nothing. Maybe you feel like you've got the right balance of stuff. I guess I could say I wish I did less of like staring at my phone or I wish I did less of... I don't know if it's procrastinating, but I am not very good at making myself do things that I think I'm required to do or that I don't want to do. Well, I wish I could override that. I don't know if that really.

Okay, I mean. No, I mean, I just, yeah, I guess maybe. Good. Yeah. Should we just go for one more? Yeah. This is a nice one. What gives you hope at the moment?

What gives me hope at the moment? I think my husband have navigated what is the hardest time in our lives, which is becoming parents. what is the hardest time in our lives, which is becoming parents, makes me, the whole thing when I look back now makes me so hopeful because we just, we have just done really well. And you know when you have those moments where you're like, oh I really can get through anything with this person I've chosen to spend my life with, I didn't fuck it up, I haven't made a bad mistake, he is definitely the right person to be doing this journey with. And often, I think when I'm at my lowest or feeling

my most lost, that theory kind of gives me a lot of hope. Yeah, and seeing Cyrus, seeing my son, you know, where he is now at 10 months, that makes me hopeful because we're getting a lot of stuff right as well as some stuff wrong. Yeah. I'm gonna say I'm not gonna even give a response because that was so beautiful and vapid and just like not as poetic. No, I want to hear what makes you hopeful. God, I don't know. You and your husband. Maybe that is it. Like, I think, yeah, I think I'm big into like doing a daily gratitude practice. And I think being surrounded by people like yourself

who are able to be such just like, genuinely good, supportive, loving, kind people and knowing that you are raising a son who is going to be the next generation of someone of a similar ilk. Actually, yeah, like that gives me hope and like knowing that like, I've got other friends who are, you know, good people. And I think it's that. I think it's having a home in my life. My parents and stuff like that, just knowing that those people are the ones that I surround myself with.

I think that gives me a lot of hope. Aw, good answer, Sue. You're so cute. Those are good questions. Yeah, they are, right? We'll work our way through them. So I think on that note, while we're all mushy and being quite sweet, we will be back, hopefully a bit more regularly, depending on what life throws at us. But as always, thank you so much for tuning in and giving us your time. And

follow us on Instagram at issue okay podcast, please do subscribe and like and rate and review because it is very helpful for us. And again, like if there's anything you want us to discuss, we are very open to topic ideas. Yes, DM us. Please slide into our DMs because no one else does that. Yeah, have a great week and I will speak to you soon. Thanks. Bye, Sam.