It Could Happen Here - CZM Book Club: Winnie the Pooh by AA Milne

Episode Date: July 20, 2025

Margaret got talked into doing something fun for book club this week. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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To hear this and more, listen to Good Moms Bad Choices from Black Effect Podcast Network on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you get your podcast. Cool Zone Media. Book club, book club, book club, book club. Hello and welcome to the Cool Zone Media Book Club, the only book club where you don't have to do the reading because I do it for you. I'm your host, Margaret Kildray, and usually I bring you stories that I can point to some political reasoning behind.

But this week, I wanted to do something fun. And my idea of fun, which still means weird old timey shit, but fun nonetheless. And one of my friends said to me, well Winnie the Pooh is in public domain, you could do Winnie the Pooh. And I thought, ha ha ha, that is a funny joke. And so I looked up some Winnie the Pooh, and I started reading it to two of my friends this morning, and I was like, wait no, this is really fun to read.

It's just fun, it's very well written in a kind of interesting way. It's just literally like the words roll off the tongue in a fun way. So that's what I'm going to read to you today. I'm going to read you some chapters from the book Winnie the Pooh. Winnie the Pooh was written by a guy named A. A. Milne, and it was written for his son, Christopher Robin, who's the sort of main character. Well, Winnie the Pooh is the main character, but the main human character. And it's basically a bunch of children's stories that an incredibly talented author wrote for his kid about his kid's stuffed animals.

And it did it in a really interesting way. And so then I had to do this thing where I was like, ah, I need to look up Milne's like, to figure out if he's just like an absolute bastard. And I don't know everything about him yet. This is like not something I'm incredibly well versed in, but I spent several hours reading about Milne this morning. And I can tell you that if nothing else, he was a pacifist,

although he was a pacifist who fought in both world wars and he fought in the first world war because he felt like he got tricked into thinking it was the war to end all wars and Then he wrote this book this anti-war book called peace with honor in 1934 That was basically a like hey, we shouldn't go to war like pro-pacifism argument But then as the Nazis came to power, he was like, you know what? Well, the Nazis already come to power in 1934. But as things got real obvious, he actually changed his mind. And he was like, in 1940, he wrote a book called War with Honor. And I don't think that book is a particularly important radical text or anything. it's all about how the atomic bomb is good because it'll end the war.

But either way, he came around on anti-fascism. Well, I think he was always anti-fascist, as best as I can tell. But basically he was like, you know what, like, I'm anti-war, but Hitler is essentially the devil and needs to be stopped. And personally, I don't think he's wrong about that. I don't feel pacifist about World War II at all. So, his really interesting quotes, right? Like, when the Austrian Archduke Fernandat or whatever the fuck gets offed and it starts World War I, his quote about it was that this has, quote, resulted in the death of nearly 10 million men who were not archdukes. And he also wrote, wars are fought for economic reasons,

but they are fought by volunteers for sentimental reasons. And he talks about how propaganda machines like work to create cultural consensus that we should all go off and sacrifice ourselves into the war machine. None of that has anything to do with Winnie the Pooh. And I don't know what he feels about colonialism or any of that stuff. But I do know that after he survived World War I, he was like, I am so lucky that I survived World War I.

So I'm going to work very, very hard to try and create art. And he did. He was just an incredibly hardworking author. And then the Winnie the Pooh books just kind of like took off. But rather than like ride them into the sunset, he did them for a while. And then he was like, you know what? I don't really want to do this anymore.

And I have so much respect for that. So I don't know enough about him to really say anything one way or the other, but the stuff I've read about him is interesting. A.A. Milne. Winnie the Pooh, everyone. Thanks for doing something fun with me. Chapter One, in which we are introduced to Winnie the Pooh and some bees, and the stories begin. Here is Edward Bear coming downstairs now, bump bump on the back of his head behind Christopher Robin. It is as far as he knows the only way of coming

downstairs but sometimes he feels that there really is another way if only he could stop bumping for a moment and think of it. And then he feels that perhaps there isn't. Anyhow here he is at the bottom and ready to be introduced to you. Winnie the Pooh. When I first heard his name, I said, just as you were going to say, but I thought he was a boy. So did I, said Christopher Robin. Then you can't call him Winnie. I don't. But you said, he's Winnie the Pooh. Don't you know what there means? Ah, yes, now I do, I said quickly, and I hope you do too, because it is all the explanation

you are going to get. Sometimes Winnie the Pooh likes a game of some sort when he comes downstairs, and sometimes he likes to sit quietly in front of the fire and listen to a story. This evening— What about a story? said Christopher Robin. What about a story? I said.

Could you very sweetly tell Winnie the Pooh one? I suppose I could, I said. What sort of stories does he like? About himself, because he's that sort of bear. Oh, I see. So could you very sweetly? I'll try, I said. So I tried. Once upon a time, a very long time ago now,

about last Friday, Winnie the Pooh lived in a forest all by himself under the name of Sanders. What does under the name mean, asked Christopher Robin. It means he had a name over the door in gold letters and lived under it. Winnie the Pooh wasn't quite sure, said Christopher Robin. Now I am, said a growly voice. Then I will go on, said I. One day when he was out walking, he came to an open place in the middle of the forest. And in the middle of this place was a large oak tree.

And from the top of the tree, there came a loud buzzing noise. Winnie the Pooh sat down at the foot of the tree, put his head between his paws and began to think. First of all, he said to himself, that buzzing noise means something. You don't get a buzzing noise like that, just buzzing and buzzing without its meaning something. If there's a buzzing noise, somebody's making a buzzing noise. And the only reason for making a buzzing noise that I know of is because you're a bee. Then he thought another long time and said, and the only reason for making a buzzing noise that I know of is because you're a bee.

Then he thought another long time and said, and the only reason for being a bee that I know of is making honey. And then he got up and he said, and the only reason for making honey is so that I can eat it. So he began to climb the tree. He climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he climbed and he sang a little song to himself. It went like this, Isn't it funny how a bear likes honey? Buzz buzz buzz I wonder why he does. Then he climbed a little further and a little further and then just a little further.

By that time he had thought of another song, It's a very funny thought that if bears were bees they build their nests at the bottom of trees. And that being so, if bees were bears, we shouldn't have to climb up all these stairs. He was getting rather tired by this time, so that is why he sang a complaining song. He was nearly there now, and if he just stood on that branch— Crack! Oh help, said Poo, as he dropped ten feet on the branch below him. If only I hadn't, he said as he bounced twenty feet onto the next branch. You see what I meant to do, he explained as he turned head over heels and crashed onto

another branch thirty feet below. What I meant to do? Of course it was rather, he admitted, as he slithered very quickly through the next six branches. It all comes, I suppose, he decided, as he said goodbye to the last branch, spun round three times, and flew gracefully into a gorse bush. It all comes of liking honey so much. Oh help.

He crawled out of the gorse bush, brushed the prickles from his nose, and began to think again. And the first person he thought of was Christopher Robin. "'Was that me?' said Christopher Robin in an awed voice, hardly daring to believe it. "'That was you.' Christopher Robin said nothing but his eyes got larger and larger, and his face got pinker and pinker."

So Winnie the Pooh went round to his friend Christopher Robin, who lived behind a green door in another part of the forest. And do you know what was plastered on that door, dear listener? Nothing but ads. The ads were just always there. They just interject themselves into all of your childhood favorites. Here they are. OpenAI is a financial abomination. A thing that should not be. An aberration. A symbol of rot at the heart of Silicon Valley. And I'm going to tell you why on my show Better Offline, the rudest show in the tech

industry. Where we're breaking down why OpenAI, along with other AI companies, are dead set on lying to your boss that they can take your job. I'm also going to be talking with the greatest minds in the industry about all the other ways the rich and powerful are ruining the computer. Listen to Better Offline on the iHot Radio app, Apple Podcasts, wherever you happen to get your podcasts. Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebene, the podcast where silence is broken and stories are set free. I'm Ebene and every Tuesday,

I'll be sharing all new anonymous stories that will challenge your perceptions and give you new insight on the people around you. On Pretty Private, we'll explore the untold experiences of women of color who faced it all, childhood trauma, addiction, abuse, incarceration, grief, mental health struggles, and more, and found the shrimp to make it to the other side. My dad was shot and killed in his

house. Yes, he was a drug dealer. Yes, he was a confidential informant, but he wasn't shot on a street corner. He wasn't shot in the middle of a drug deal. He was shot in his house, unarmed. Pretty Private isn't just a podcast, it's your personal guide for turning storylines into lifelines. Every Tuesday, make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect Podcast Network. Tune in on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcast, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. The summer of 1993 was one of the best of my life. I'm journalist Jeff Perlman and this is Rick Jervis.

We were interns at the Nashville Tennessean, but the most unforgettable part? Our roommate, Reggie Payne, from Oakley, sports editor and aspiring rapper. And his stage name? Sexy Sweat. In 2020, I had a simple idea. Let's find Reggie. We searched everywhere, but Reggie was gone. In February 2020, Reggie was having a diabetic episode. His mom called 911.

Police cuffed him face down. He slipped into a coma and died. I'm like thanking you, but then I see my son's not moving. No headlines, no outrage, just silence. So we started digging and uncovered city officials bent on protecting their own. Listen to Finding Sexy Sweat on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. What would you do if one bad decision forced you to choose between a maximum security prison I guess. Shock incarceration, also known as boot camps, are short-term, highly regimented correctional programs that mimic military basic training.

These programs aim to provide a shock of prison life, emphasizing strict discipline, physical training, hard labor, and rehabilitation programs. Mark had one chance to complete this program and had no idea of the hell awaiting him the next six months The first night was so overwhelming and you don't know who's next to you and we didn't know what to expect in the morning Nobody tells you anything listen to shock incarceration on the iHeart radio app Apple podcasts or wherever you get your podcasts And we're back. Good morning Christopher Robin, he said.

Good morning Winnie the Pooh, said you. I wonder if you've got such a thing as a balloon about you. A balloon? Yes, I just said to myself coming along I wonder if Christopher Robin has such a thing as a balloon about him. I just said it to myself along, I wonder if Christopher Robin has such a thing as a balloon about him. I just said it to myself, thinking of balloons and wondering. What do you want a balloon for, you said. Winnie the Pooh looked round to see that nobody was listening, put his paw to his mouth and

said in a deep whisper, honey. But you don't get honey with balloons. I do, said Pooh. Well, it just happened that you had been to a party the day before at the house of your friend Piglet, and you had balloons at the party. You had a big green balloon, and one of Rabbit's relations had had a very big blue one, and had left it behind, being really too young to go to a party at all, and so you had brought the green one and the blue one home with you.

Which one would you like? You asked Poo. He put his head between his paws and thought very carefully. It's like this, he said. When you go after honey with a balloon, the great thing is to not let the bees know you're coming. Now, if you have a green balloon, they might think you're only part of the tree and not notice you.

And if you had a blue balloon, well, they might think you're only part of the sky and not notice you. The question is, which is most likely?" Wouldn't they notice you beneath the balloon, you asked? They might or they might not, said Winnie the Pooh. You never can tell with bees. He thought for a moment and said, I shall try to look like a small black cloud. That will deceive them. Then you had better have a blue balloon, you said, and so it was decided.

Well, you both went out with the blue balloon and you took your gun with you, just in case, as you always did. And Winnie the Pooh went to a very muddy place that he knew of and rolled and rolled until he was black all over. And then when the balloon was blown up as big as big and you and Pooh were both holding onto the string,

you let go suddenly and Pooh Bear floated gracefully up into the sky and stayed there. Level with the top of the tree, about 20 feet away from it. Hooray, you shouted. Isn't that fine, shouted Winnie the Pooh down to you. What do I look like? You look like a bear holding onto a balloon, you said. Not, said Pooh anxiously, not like a small black cloud in a blue sky.

Not very much. Well, perhaps from up here it looks different. And as I say, you never can tell with bees. There was no wind to blow him nearer to the tree, and so there he stayed. He could see the honey, he could smell the honey, but he couldn't quite reach the honey. After a little while he called down to you. Christopher Robin, he said in a loud whisper.

Hello. I think the bees suspect something. What sort of thing? I don't know, but something tells me that they're suspicious. Perhaps they think you're after their honey. It may be that. You never can tell with bees. There was another little silence,

then he called down to you again. Christopher Robin! Yes? Have you an umbrella in your house? I think so. I wish you would bring it out here and walk up and down with it and look up at me every now and then and say, tut tut, it looks like rain. I think if you did that, it would help the deception which we are practicing on these bees. While you laughed to yourself, silly old bear, but you didn't say it aloud because you were so fond of him, and you went home for your umbrella. Oh there you are, called down Winnie the Pooh as soon as you got back to the tree. I was beginning to get anxious. I have discovered that the bees are now definitely suspicious.

Shall I put my umbrella up? You said. Yes, but wait a moment. We must be practical. The important bee to deceive is the queen bee. Can you see which is the queen bee from down there? No. A pity. Well now, if you walk up and down with your umbrella saying, Tut tut, it looks like rain, I shall do what I can by singing a little cloud song such as a cloud might sing go and so while you

walked up and down and wondered if it would rain Winnie the Pooh sang this song how sweet to be a cloud floating in the blue every little cloud always sings aloud how sweet to be a cloud, floating in the blue, it makes him very proud to be a little cloud. The bees were still buzzing as suspiciously as ever. Some of them indeed left their nests and flew all around the cloud as it began the second verse of the song. And one bee sat down on the nose of the cloud for a moment, and then got up again.

Christopher, ow, Robin, called out the cloud. Yes, I have just been thinking and I have come to a very important decision. These are the wrong sorts of bees. Are they? Quite the wrong sort. So I should think they would make the wrong sort of honey. Shouldn't you?

Would they? Yes, so I think I shall come down. How, asked you. Winnie the Pooh hadn't thought about this. If you let go of the string, he would fall bump. He didn't like the idea of that. So he thought for a long time and then he said, Christopher Robin, you must shoot the balloon with your gun.

Have you got your gun? Of course I have, you said. But if I do that, it will spoil the balloon, you said. But if you don't, said Pooh, I shall have to let go, and that would spoil me. When he put it like this, you saw how it was, and you aimed very carefully at the balloon, and fired. Ow! said Poo. Did I miss, you asked?

You didn't exactly miss, said Poo, but you missed the balloon. I'm so sorry you said, and you fired again and this time you hit the balloon, and the air came slowly out and Winnie the Pooh floated down to the ground. But his arms were so stiff from holding on to the string of the balloon all that time that they stayed up straight in the air for more than a week, and whenever a fly came and settled on his nose he had to blow it off. And I think, but I am not sure, that that is why he was always called Poo. Is that the end of the story, asked Christopher Robin? That's the end of one. There are others.

About Poo and me, and Piglet, and Rabbit, and all of you. Don't you remember? I do remember, it's just that when I try to remember, I forget. That day when Poo and Piglet tried to catch the heffalump. Oh, they didn't catch it, did they? No. Pooh couldn't because he hasn't any brain. Did I catch it?

Well, that comes into the story." Christopher Robin nodded. I do remember, he said, only Pooh doesn't very well, so that's why he likes having it told to him again, because then it's a real story and not just a remembering. That's just how I feel, I said. Christopher Robin gave a deep sigh, picked up his bear by the leg and walked off to the door, trailing Pooh behind him. At the door he turned around and said, coming to see me have my bath. I might, I said.

It didn't hurt him when I shot him, did it? Not a bit. He nodded and went out, and in a moment I heard Winnie the Pooh bump bump bump, going up the stairs behind him. And what he also heard was the sweet serenade of advertisers singing an evening song. Unless you have coolers on media, in which case you just hear the interjections. Unless you have coolers on media, in which case you just hear the interjections. Open AI is a financial abomination. A thing that should not be.

An aberration. A symbol of rot at the heart of Silicon Valley. And I'm going to tell you why on my show Better Offline, the rudest show in the tech industry. Where we're breaking down why open AI, along with other AI companies, are dead set on lying to your boss that they can take your job. I'm also going to be talking with the greatest minds in the industry about all the other ways the rich and powerful are ruining the computer.

Listen to Better Offline on the iHot Radio app, Apple Podcasts, wherever you happen to get your podcasts. Welcome to Pretty Private with Ebene, the podcast where silence is broken and stories are set free. I'm Ebene and every Tuesday I'll be sharing all new anonymous stories that will challenge your perceptions and give you new insight on the people around you. On Pretty Private, we'll explore the untold experiences of women of color who faced it all, childhood trauma, addiction, abuse, incarceration, grief,

mental health struggles, and more, and found the strength to make it to the other side. My dad was shot and killed in his house. Yes, he was a drug dealer. Yes, he was a confidential informant, but he wasn't shot on a street corner. He wasn't shot in the middle of a drug deal. He was shot in his house unarmed. Pretty Private isn't just a podcast. It's your personal guide for turning storylines into lifelines. Every Tuesday, make sure you listen to Pretty Private from the Black Effect Podcast Network. Tune in on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows. Sometimes it's hard to remember, but going through something like that is a

traumatic experience, but it's also not the end of their life. That was my dad reminding me and so many others who need to hear it, that our trauma is not our shame to carry and that we have big, bold and beautiful lives to live after what happened to us. I'm your host and co-president of this organization, Dr. Lea Tritate. On my new podcast, The Unwanted Sorority, we wade through transformation to peel back healing and reveal what it actually looks like and sounds like in real time. Each week I sit down with people who live through harm, carried silence, and are now

reshaping the systems that failed us. We're going to talk about the adultification of black girls, mothering as resistance, and the tools we use for healing. The Unwanted Sorority is a safe space, not a quiet space. So let's walk in. We're moving towards liberation together. Listen to The Unwanted Sorority, new episodes every Thursday on the iHeartRadio app, Apple podcasts,

or wherever you get your podcasts. The summer of 1993 was one of the best of my life. I'm journalist Jeff Perlman, and this is Rick Jervis. We were interns at the Nashville Tennessean, but the most unforgettable part? Our roommate, Reggie Payne from Oakley, sports editor and aspiring rapper. And his stage name? Sexy Sweat. In 2020, I had a simple idea. Let's find Reggie.

We searched everywhere, but Reggie was gone. In February, 2020, Reggie was having a diabetic episode. His mom called 911. Police cuffed him face down. He slipped into a coma and died. I'm like thanking you. But then I see my son's not moving. No headlines, no outrage, just silence. So we started digging and uncovered city officials bent on protecting their own.

Listen to Finding Sexy Sweat on the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts. [♪ music playing, ch I'm not trying to cancel Winnie the Pooh, but I'm not going to read it. I'm going to read chapter three, which is, in which Pooh and Piglet go hunting and nearly catch a Woozle. And I'm totally reading this one because of the name that comes up in the first paragraph because it's so sick. The Piglet lived in a very grand house in the middle of a beech tree. And the beech tree was in the middle of the forest and Piglet lived in the middle of the house.

Next to his house was a piece of broken board which had Trespassers W on it. When Christopher Robin asked the piglet what it meant, he said it was his grandfather's name and had been in the family for a long time. Christopher Robbins said, you couldn't be called Trespassers W. And Piglet said, yes you could, because his grandfather was and it was short for Trespassers Will, which was short for Trespassers William.

And his grandfather had had two names in just in case he lost one. Trespassers after an uncle and William after Trespassers. I've got two names, said Christopher Robin carelessly. Well, there you are. That proves it, said Piglet. One fine winter's day when Piglet was brushing away the snow from the front of his house, he happened to look up, and there was Winnie the Pooh. Pooh was walking round, round in a circle, thinking of something else, and when Piglet

called to him, he just went on walking. Hello! said Piglet. What are you doing? Hunting, said Pooh. Hunting what? Tracking something, said Winnie the Pooh very mysteriously. Tracking what? said Piglet, coming closer. That's just what I ask myself. I ask myself what. What do you think you'll answer? I shall have to wait until I catch up with it, said Winnie the Pooh. Now look there, he pointed to the ground in front of him.

What do you see there? Track, said Piglet, palm marks. He gave a little squeak of excitement. Oh, Pooh, do you think it's a, a, a woozle? It may be, said Pooh. Sometimes it is, and sometimes it isn't. You can never tell with palm marks. But these few words he went on tracking in Piglet after watching him for

a minute or two ran after him. Winnie the Pooh had come to a sudden stop and was bending over the tracks in a puzzled sort of way. What's the matter, asked Piglet? It's a very funny thing, said Bear, but there seems to be two animals now. This whatever-it-was has been joined by another whatever-it-is, and the two of them are now proceeding in company. Would you mind coming with me, Piglet, in case they turn out to be hostile animals? Piglet scratched his ear in a nice sort of way and said that he had nothing

to do until Friday, and he would be delighted to come in case it really was a woozle. You mean, in case it really is two woozles, said Winnie the Pooh, and Piglet said that anyhow he had nothing to do until Friday. So off they went together. There was a small spinny of larch trees just there, and it seemed as if the two woozles, if that's what they were, had been going round this spinny of larch trees just there, and it seemed as if the two woozles, if that's what they were, had been going round this spinny. So round the spinny went Pooh and Piglet after them, Piglet passing the time by telling Pooh

what his grandfather Trespasser's W had done to remove stiffness after tracking, and how his grandfather Trespasser's W had suffered in his later years from shortness of breath and other matters of interest, and Pooh wondering what a grandfather was like and if perhaps this was two grandfathers they were after now, and if so, whether he would be allowed to take one home and keep it, and what Christopher Robin would say. And still the tracks went on in front of them. Suddenly Winnie the Pooh stopped and pointed excitedly in front of him.

Look! What? said Piglet with a jump. And then to show that he hadn't been frightened, he jumped up and down once or twice more in an exercising sort of way. The tracks, said Pooh. A third animal has joined the other two. Pooh! cried Piglet. Do you think it's another woozle?

No, said Pooh, because it makes different marks. It is either two woozles and one as it might be, or two as it might be, and one if it is so, woozle. Let us continue to follow them. And so they went on, feeling just a little bit anxious now, in case the three animals in front of them were of hostile intent.

And Piglet wished very much that his grandfather T.W. were there instead of elsewhere. And Pooh thought how nice it would be if.W. were there, instead of elsewhere. And Pooh thought how nice it would be if they met Christopher Robin suddenly but quite accidentally. And only because he liked Christopher Robin so much. And then, all of the sudden, Winnie the Pooh stopped again and licked the tip of his nose in a cooling manner, for he was feeling more hot and anxious than ever before in his life. There were four animals in front of them.

Do you see, Piglet? Look at their tracks, three as it were wuzzles and one as it was whistle. Another wuzzle has joined them. And so it seemed to be. There were the tracks, crossing over each other here, getting muddied up with each other there. But quite plainly, every now and then, the tracks of four sets of paws. I think, said Piglet, when he had licked the tip of his nose too and found it brought very little comfort.

I think that I have just remembered something. I have just remembered something that I forgot to do yesterday and I shan't be able to do tomorrow, so I suppose I really ought to go back and do it now. We'll do it this afternoon and I'll come with you, said Poo. It isn't the sort of thing you can do in the afternoon," said Piglet quickly. It's a very particular morning thing and it has to be done in the morning and if possible between the hours of, what would you say the time was?

About 12," said Winnie the Pooh, looking at the sun. Between, as I was saying, the hours of 12 and 12.5, so really dear old Pooh, if you excuse me, what's that? Pooh looked up at the sky and then he heard the whistle again. He looked up at the branches of a big oak tree, and he saw a friend of his. It's Christopher Robin, he said. Ah, then you'll be all right, said Piglet. You'll be quite safe with him.

Goodbye. And he trotted off home as quickly as he could, very glad to be out of all danger again. Christopher Robin came slowly down this tree. Silly old bear, he said. What were you doing? First you went round the spinny twice by yourself, and then Piglet ran after you and you went round again together, and then you were just going round a fourth time. Wait a moment, said Winnie the Pooh, holding up his paw. He sat down and thought, in the most thoughtful way he could think. Then he fitted his paw into one of the tracks. Then he scratched his nose twice and stood up.

Yes, said Winnie the Pooh. I see now, said Winnie the Pooh. I have been foolish and deluded, said he, and I am a bear of no brain at all. You're the best bear in all the world, said Christopher Robin soothingly. Am I? Said Pooh hopefully. And then he brightened up suddenly. Anyhow, he said, it is nearly luncheon time.

So he went home for it. The end. I did read Winnie the Pooh as a kid. The stories are sort of like familiar and unfamiliar to me. I had no idea how often any of you all have read it. I just have really enjoyed when I read it to my friends singing weird little songs. And so I thought you all would too. And the other thing that I think about because I know what you're thinking.

You're thinking Margaret, but how are you going to tie Winnie the Pooh into Lord of the Rings? And I have an answer for you. And that answer is very British because it involves three British men. It involves Milne, who wrote Winnie the Pooh. It involves Tolkien, who wrote Lord of the Rings. And it involves a man named Michael Moorcock, who's a pulp anarchist fantasy author writing more in the 60s and 70s, who's still alive today.

Most famous these days is the person who created the Chaos Star. He wrote an essay called The Epic Poo in which he just trashes on Lord of the Rings. He's just, it's like a well-written, just absolutely eviscerating critique of Lord of the Rings, which I obviously therefore completely disagree with because Lord of the Rings is perfect in every way. And specifically, it critiques the idea.

So Winnie the Pooh is being used to represent like the ultimate British cozy fantasy where like you're not worried about shit. And I think that's fair. That's what Winnie the Pooh represents. But it's about fucking stuffed animals and it's for a kid. So I don't think you can get mad at Winnie the Pooh. But to claim basically the argument that Moorcock makes, it's been a little while since I read this essay.

The argument he makes is that the hobbits represent the rural British and basically the like, you know, stick your heads in the sand attitude of the world where you're like, well, my life is fine, so everyone's life is fine. Despite all of this, like, horror and bloodshed happening just outside the Shire or just outside, you know, England or whatever. And so basically, Moorcock critiques Lord of the Rings as being, like, too cozy, too neat, too, like, oh, we're off to the war and we

come back again. And I think that there's parts of this that are fair and parts of that aren't. I think that Lord of the Rings is actually specifically like at least Tolkien and Milne fought in World War I, right? And Milne actually fought in World War II also in the same way that Orwell did, which was as part of the Home Guard, which was the people who were running around in case and were like training to fight in case the Nazis invaded England, which was a very real possibility that did not happen. And so even though he was in his, I want to say 50s or 60s, Milne was Captain Milne, although he made all of the people under him just call him Mr. Milne because he was like that.

And so to accuse Tolkien, now I'm just standing up for Tolkien's honor. Sorry, Moorcock, if you're listening, you might have been more right than me. I don't know, whatever. To accuse Tolkien of like sanitizing war is a very interesting thing because trench combat in World War I is like kind of the worst thing I can imagine having happen in your life and it's usually the end of your life or it's often the end of your life, you know? And actually one of the core ideas, I think on some level I think Tolkien is aware that the hobbits are representing this, you know, sort of British attitude or whatever, right?

But they come home again changed. That's like one of the core parts of it, right? Some of them come home like braver and stronger, but some of them just come home like fucking broken, you know? Anyway, that's how I can tie Winnie the Pooh into Lord of the Rings. You're welcome. Have a good week. And also, there's exciting stuff coming around the bend for Cool Zone Media Book Club that we're going to be able to change up the content pretty soon. I've been enjoying this sort of content, but we've got like a bunch of ideas

and it's gonna be good. And also, if you like anthropomorphic animals and you like my storytelling, you might like a book that came out this very last week, unless you're listening to this in the future on which it came out a while ago, came out in July in 2025. It's a book called The Defender's Almanac

and it's a tabletop role playing game set in the world of the board game Defenders of the Wild. And if you're thinking, but I don't know that board game or even I don't play tabletop role-playing games, you actually still might like this book. It's from Outlandish Games and it is a standalone thing. You don't need the board game to play it, but it's also an almanac. That's why it's called The Defender's Almanac. And it's basically, I wrote, I didn't write the game mechanics or anything like that,

other people who are better at that did it. I wrote a lot of stories of anthropomorphic animals coming together, finding bravery and fighting machines. Because I like doing that sort of thing. And you can get it now. It's out. It's available. That's what I got. I'll see you all next week for another episode of Cool Zone Media Book Club.

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