It’s Wednesday My Dudes - Ep. 15: Air Dud and Forrest Dump

Episode Date: April 28, 2021

The boyos are talking football this week with the NFL drafting coming up on Thursday they make their picks for who they want their teams to grab, we talk through the Falcon and Winter Solidier Finale, Circle Season 2, and then we draft our own football teams comprised of solely fictional football characters. Timestamps: 0:00:00 - 0:20:01 - Falcon Finale 0:20:01 - 0:33:57 - Circle Season 2 0:33:57 - 0:53:13 - NFL Draft 0:53:13 - 1:28:45 - Fictional Football Draft Follow us on Twitter @IWMD_Pod

It is Wednesday, my dudes. cory myers is back it me it cory and the bri guy i accidentally bought regular cheerios this week instead of honey nut it's a bad been a bad week i didn't know that this intro was just like share time for the random problems in your life but like here we are all right so what's your problem today this week rooks man i golfed like shit on sunday i played so bad but anyway how was the hot dog at the turn though oh the hot dog hits so different they did this shit where they like kind of like diced it a little too it was like but it wasn't like it wasn't like pigs in a blanket minus the blanket i mean that's a fucking hot dog is it not yeah all right i'm just gonna bypass that we got another week of it's wednesday my dudes

we're talking falcon winter soldier finale we're talking nfl drafts coming up this thursday a lot of big moves to be made and in the spirit of the draft we are going to have our own draft which we will we will talk about later football related we're going to keep it in there and then cory and bry guy are going to talk a little bit about the circle we tell you why you have to watch it exactly but let's let's kick it off falcon winter soldier finale what do we got boys do you guys like the suit yes so my thoughts on the suit i like it i don't like the part that's going over his face i like everything else but the part that's like it's like wrapped on his neck like comes up the side and then like bleeds into his goggles his like his rec specs that he always

has to wear and that part i'm a little a little about but everything else is pretty sick it's a romper that goes all the way up to his eyes you gotta take the whole thing off when he goes to the bathroom romp him dude sorry sorry sorry there's too much white on the suit is what my opinion is because if you look at like the captain america one it's like mostly like bluish grayish in this one it's like 80 white and so it's just a lot of color. And then he has his wings, which are also bright grayish-white or something like that. And then he has

the shield as well, which is red, white, and blue. So it's just a lot going on. So tone it down a bit. I think it'll look cool, but right now it's just too much American pride for me. I like this suit. I agree, though. I don't like his little shit on his head. Turtleneck? me i like i like this suit i i agree though i don't like his little like his little like

shit on his head turtleneck yeah i don't even know what to fucking call it like it's yeah i don't know what to call that shit i did not like that but overall i think this suit was kind of drippy the only thing i will say i know uh when he brought out Redwing again off his back, I was like, I first was reminded that Redwing existed. The only thing I wish they would have done was make it more comic accurate where he actually has a bird, an actual falcon. How more sick would it be if he had an actual falcon just flying around with him? Way more cooler than the mechanical one. That'd be so fucking cool. I want to seeve 10 times the size of a regular bird though i need this thing to be gigantic oh dude i got it a falcon on the super soldier serum you're welcome just a yoak ass bird

just chill it'd be uh it'd be way better than those eagles in lord of the rings am i right him actually doing something at the appropriate time oh my god you're you're the worst man but any who's i i like the finale i thought it was good i i'm still in the in the realm of like the flag smashers they just don't do it for me they're really like carly's whole character arc and everything it's just it was so boring to me just like i don't know they had two villains and they had six episodes and so they couldn't make them both be decent i think john walker was done pretty well but not like great yeah and if they just got rid of carly and the black flag smashers entirely or just made them like a very very like a c villain i feel like they had like two

i don't even want to say like villains they're like two anti-heroes because like zemo and then walker were both like oh like maybe they're good maybe they're not. And then Carly was supposed to be the big, like, the big bad villain. And like Rook said, like, I don't think she was carrying it. I completely agree. We also got the, like, toe-of-the-line shit with Carly, though, in the middle, like the anti-hero,

because it was her talking to Sam and being, oh, like, maybe you're right. Like, maybe I trust you and I don't want to do this type of shit. And the last episode was just like fuck it she hates everybody she wants everybody dead now like I just I just that part was written in all honesty I think that's the only like gripe I have was just that that quick turn of character that just had little to no effect for me. Yeah. You got to set that up a lot more and I didn't have enough time to do it. Yeah.

Yeah. I didn't John Walker. I thought they did a good job up until this last episode. So at the end of the fifth episode, he's building his own shield and he looks very angry. And then he, he walks in on this episode. He walks in and says, you know, Morgenthau, you know, calling out Carly or whatever.

And then by the end, he's just bros with Bucky. And this man has been discharged from the military, probably shouldn't be engaging in any sort of, you know, civilian rescue mission. And then he's just broing out with Captain America and Bucky. And it just didn't feel right from an... Like, it didn't feel earned that he went from all of a sudden, I just killed a guy in the streets. I got discharged. I'm very angry and building my own shield.

To all of a sudden, I'm cool standing next to the Winter Soldier and we're kind of just bro-ing out. And then at the end, he has a weird interaction with Julie Louis-Dreyfus. And I mean, I get what they're trying to do it just and i think covet affected the production of this was probably a lot of missing scenes and parts and stuff that we don't get to see so i don't want to hold it maybe yeah i don't want to hold it against it too much but just didn't feel like that john walker was fleshed out as much as i would have liked him to be i feel like they just ran into issues with the six episodes again.

Like they tried to do too much in a small amount of episodes. Yeah. They're like an hour long, but I feel like if they had one more episode, they would have been able to like have Walker be a psychopath in this one. And then maybe like at the tail end, like try to transition into what they did at the end of this episode. But it was pretty crammed

like and they had so many characters there's like eight villains like power broker two technically and like i don't know there's just i feel like a villain for every episode and then they don't really do a good job of making them seem like a really bad villain they're just like there's also like this guy and then this guy and then this guy. So just like be aware of all those guys. Yeah, it was a lot crammed in, but I was talking to my brother about this today of like, I didn't like this finale, but it wasn't bad. We're comparing it to the last two Disney shows,

which are WandaVision and The Mandalorian, which were both incredible. Unbelievable. So yeah, if those are 10s out of 10, if this is anything less than that, you feel a little bit disappointed so I don't think it's bad I just think it didn't deliver

as it needed to but my boy GSP came back for a third episode movie star himself they massacred my boy they shot him at the end man he's like actually gonna be like out GSP gets the shit kicked out of him and then gets shot so great job great job great job gsp like got shot punani

all right we're just gonna act like that never happened yeah do we have the fucking boo this man oh hold, you coward. Boo me. I have the draft stuff already. Good. They got that ready for the books. Oh, hey, Power Broker ended up... It's Sharon! Made zero sense. Mostly because...

Why doesn't it make zero sense? I feel like they hinted at it very heavily. Yes, Zach? It makes zero sense. They obviously hinted at it like very heavily yes zach uh it makes zero sense they obviously hinted at it and i thought it was such an aggressive hint that that it was there was no way she was going to be it what doesn't make sense is that as the power broker she is obsessed with the super soldier serum so she brings sam bucky and zemo and zemo the guy who hates super soldier serum to the only guy who knows how to make super soldier serum and says yeah just don't do anything crazy while you're in there like don't shoot him in the face zemo and what does he do shoot him in the face and so

she basically brought the guy who the only guy who was super passionate about not having any super soldiers anymore and brought him to the location where they were and that's what i don't get is she could have had an army like i know she's all pumped at the end of the episode and we have all these secrets blah blah you could have had an army of super soldiers and now you're just like we got some cool robots it's gonna be dope and that's what i don't get i i like the play though because like i feel like you're really underplaying the fact that she's now trusted on like the Avengers group like she'll know everything going on and she people won't suspect her and she can do whatever but she did the same thing turning like all the Avengers against each other in Civil War and he's supposed to be one of the better villains because of how successful he was at doing that like i think i think that's seriously gonna come in handy in the next few movies or whatever she's gonna be a part of because she's just flying under the radar and she can do whatever the hell she wants and i feel like at that moment when it's like weighing your options of do i bring

them to go ruin this plan i have for a better plan like i don't know i think it's i think it's pretty good i just feel like she could have both why why did she need to bring sam and bucky and zemo to the doctor in the first place she could have had a super soldier serum and somehow found a way to to get in back in i just don't understand what what the need was to kill one plan to get to the other one if if you have an army of super soldiers like i don't know i don't think we need as much military secrets right i think i take i march my 100 super soldiers into wherever and take that shit like i mean they show that the super soldiers aren't that strong though you just shoot them like they're not bulletproof captain america was good with a shield a gun so like they're useful but i think

if she gets like iron man suits or something that's more of like a weapon than just sort of strong people you know or like she saw that they had infinity stones at one point and there could be other things like that yeah those are kind of strong yeah bro i gotta gripe with the shield on this episode again so he throws it there's no there's no physics there's no explanation there's nothing brian hates freedom oh yeah obviously big communist over here um but so he throws the shield which has been like breaking through windows and like metal beams and things and then gsp throws like a chair in the air and hits it out there that was funny i did laugh out loud there's no physics there are none there's no explanation for this shit it's just this magical shield it has a mind of its fucking own

dude like there's no explanation yeah that's gonna bother me for a while but moving on i think having a falcon have the shield and the wings though is really cool for all like the action scenes because like what are you just like having people punch and move back and forth it gets boring really fast but being able to like fly and throw crap around and then he has like red wing as well makes it actually really interesting if you do some cool stuff with it so that I really liked honestly so the shit with him and where he was like talking to the chick

in the helicopter and like knocked a dude out and had her step up yeah that was dope as shit but I would like to say that is super convenient that is super convenient that one of the three people or four people in this fucking helicopter. Oh,

Hey, by the way, I just know for some fucking reason that you're a pilot. Like, like come the fuck on. Yeah. I want to see the alternate version where he scans the people and they're like,

no pilots on board. He's like, all right, just shoot some missile at it. That'd be great. I have one note on here that I think I had a stroke writing. I wrote, Sharon. I've been reading it this whole time we've been talking.

I don't know what this means. It says, Sharon, just girl, has no name to Bucky. What? It's the first note I have on the episode what the fuck did you say one more time give it to me one more time can I hear that again Sharon just girl has no

named Bucky I can't and everybody that's our episode thank you for joining i don't even understand oh that's great we're good we're good i was gonna say i will say so i think they did a really good job of um you know sam wilson's arc like you know great understood you know end to end great stuff with isaiah bradley awesome his speech at the end fantastic not enough boat though i have a go yeah the one thing though this is called the series is called falcon and the winter soldier at the end captain america and the winter soldier

and the winter soldier got no like development he was in the first episodes you you understood you know hey he has nightmares hey he you know is dealing with all this and then he just kind of you don't touch on that for like episodes three through five i feel like and then in episode six or at the end of episode five i guess i touch on it a little bit and then episode six he's like i guess i'll go talk to that old man like i feel like if you're gonna call the the series, you know, Captain America, Falcon and the winter soldier, you need to give equal, you know, respect. I don't respect survivor,

but like respect on it. Yeah. You just need, I like, I wanted to see the, the equal growth in both characters. And I just don't feel like I, my opinion of Sam Wilson has changed.

Great. Like, I think he's a great Captain America, but Bucky, I'm like, it's just kind of Bucky. Like he just Bucky's growth was just being a dick at the end it was like he finally built up the courage to tell the asian grandpa that he killed his son yeah like it took six episodes and he was like all right

i did it yeah and i well like we have like the steps bucky's gonna take now because like episode five is when Sam's like, do the fucking work. Like stop just trying to do the right thing all the time. And hopefully that'll make you feel better. Like do the work for this. But I completely agree. It's very late for them to say that. And like,

we really didn't get much else of the winter, or of Bucky developing and growing and shit. Yeah. So supposedly this is the one series that they're saying that they could actually have a season two. I don't know when, like after a couple of movies, which makes sense because like you could actually continue this because they

both need their own screen time more because we got a little bit of their backstory, but not a ton, but they also announced that captain america 4 is in production or is being written or something like that so i don't know if that includes winter soldier i'm assuming it's still just a continuation of this story honestly but so seeing them in a real like feature film where it's going to probably be a little bit better of a plot just like cohesiveness wise will be nice yeah captain america for a new hope electric bugaloo kind of works overall overall what are we giving the series out of 10 what are we giving it

captain america i remember when i gave wandavision because i would really sway when i give this like i think you have one division like a nine because you hated the final fight or something i didn't i didn't hate much of wandavision maybe i was looking forward as much yeah yeah sugarcoat it right come on uh well if my measuring stick is that's a nine i would probably give it a seven then all right like if i gave one division a nine i can't give it an eight i don't think i don't think this stuck the ending so i'm gonna go six because like the ending was they fought and they won it's like okay there wasn't much to it at all. I really wish they went into their backstories. Like, we still don't know why Sam was the Falcon, like, in the military.

And we still don't. I mean, we kind of know Bucky's backstory. But, like, would be pretty cool to see. And we didn't get hardly any of that. Well, I think. But I think also, like, Bucky's backstory is just, I killed a fuck ton of people. Like, I killed every person I came in contact with. They show him having, like, panic attack flashbacks, like, once every movie.

So I get it if they don't want to do a whole. It's always just, yeah, I killed the shit out of somebody. My superhero power is consistent. I'm going gonna sit right on the fence between you guys going six point six point five it's all right i don't know for some reason a six sounds too harsh but a seven sounds too good for me uh one that now like especially comparing to wandavision wandavision was just so fucking good that yeah it's it's gonna be a six five for me zach what you think of zacharias uh i'm gonna go

you know like when you're at a traffic light i'm gonna go from when it turns from green to yellow like that split second where it's the combination of both colors i'm gonna go with that one that combination on a scale of one to ten asshole what's your oh okay we're doing numbers okay uh i i'll give it a surprisingly solid a solid magenta i think surprisingly we're doing numbers okay uh i i'll give it a surprisingly a solid magenta i think surprisingly we're not rating things based off of traffic lights on this podcast weird i know i know that's the tip i know that's standard but uh it's a left uh left turn signal i think can we tier list traffic lights next episode i'd give it three palm trees um um no yeah i would i would put it i don't think i was here when we ranked

wandavision i'd say wandavision was probably like an eight out of ten i'd rank this probably um four yeah six point or no i'd probably say like a 7.1 i think the actions was was good i just wish we got more bucky um in there but again i think all the sam wilson stuff is is really cool and um you know with the stuff with isaiah bradley and i mentioned a couple times is is i think really poignant and they did a good job of not shying away from current events and issues yeah yeah definitely agree with that yeah that was a big thread throughout the whole thing which

was really cool to see and like done well it didn't seem too cheesy it's pretty on the nose but it was like still done well like his whole speech at the end was pretty cool yeah solid hey another another series down for the boys on this podcast baby that's another one loki's coming up in like a month but we already have a filler show until then come on don't call it filler this next show oh the hottest the hottest show it's so hot well hot right now all right so do you want to give a description of what circle is do you want to give a recap of what the show even is about yeah well so i describe the circle as like a social media experiment where you have what 10 contestants i think staying in

essentially like an apartment complex eight like in a big rigged out apartment complex with a whole bunch of alexa-esque devices where they can chat with other people that are living in this apartment building they can't see them they never see their faces they build a profile like a social media profile and they interact via the profile and like a game once a day uh and by chatting each other essentially and at the end of every episode or i guess a day or two days i'm not really sure about the timeline on that they will all rank each other one through eight one being the most popular the most liked the favorite eight being you're a weenie and the top two are influencers like people are in social media and they get to meet and vote out whoever they want out of the rest of the group.

And the final, I think it's like the final week is like the final eight and new people come in and fill places of people leaving. And the final eight is like the last vote. And whoever gets number one, I think is your winner. And you win $100,000. Exactly. last vote and whoever gets number one i think is your winner and you win a hundred thousand dollars exactly and so the half of the point of it is you can catfish as other people because since you can only see through the profile you can be whoever you want and just put fake photos up there it's so good it's fantastic it's weird because some people are really good at catfishing and some people suck at it but the thing is like it's but. But the thing is, it's like, it's better. You see this in season one.

It's like, and I'm not going to give spoilers, but one person I don't think is doing a good job of being a catfish, but them not doing a good job combined with how they're handling situations. Everybody looks at this person. It's just like, Oh, she's just like super innocent.

And like, yeah, she's just so nice. And like, she just means well with everything. But it's like, in reality reality if you looked at this stuff like as you're watching it and you're like what the fuck this obviously isn't this person like it's obviously not but it's just from that from their view though it's completely different which is why the show is fucking genius it is such a good idea for a show from you go from season one to

now season two and there's complete like different viewpoints on what the show is because season one was new to everybody in the u.s they have different version of versions of this for like france and brazil and whatever but in the u.s they're all actually just trying to like portray whatever they want via social media and there's not much scheming and like gameplay going on to try to win the money it's more like this is a fun experience and then you get to season two and it's like i'm gonna catfish because um if i do this like it like they could befriend people and they think they know how to do it. And then they like build up a huge backstory that is actually pretty well put together.

And it's, it's so sketchy. Everything is so sketchy in season two compared to season one, I think. Yeah. The way they vote is really telling too. In season one, it's like,

there's this dude named Shuby. Who's always just like, I love this guy. He's my number one. Shuby. He's the best. Easily your favorites. Go watch season one. You like there's this dude named shooby who's always just like i love this guy he's my number one easily your favorites go watch season one you'll love him but in season two from the very first week they're like all right everyone likes this guy i'm gonna rank him last because i need his rankings to come down and it's like okay cool they're playing the game now season one back with shooby he was like the reason i'm here is to show that social media doesn't matter and you can still be like a good person even though you're whatever and then season two they're just like

i'm trying to be as hot as possible so i can flirt with everybody because one of the girls that's on the show chloe is from the show too hot to handle whose premise is these people have sex too much and hook up with enough too much people that we're gonna put on my island and tell them you can't do anything or you lose money so which is like how is that even a show i still don't even understand that one i didn't i watched like three episodes and i was like okay this is dumb like i'm done with it also this season is just off like off the rails they have too many weird people in it like chloe's in it they have another kind of celebrity person in it and so everybody is like is that chloe from too hot to handle like yeah it's so interesting i don't know the there's a dude in season two from the very beginning so this isn't a spoiler who's an old

dude catfish has a young dude which i don't think that's that hard to do unless you talk about like pop culture or like just in how you like kind of text you're not gonna get caught so like i think he has an easy path towards the end whereas like other people are like a dude cause like catfishing as like a 18 year old like college student girl it's like yeah which goes south yeah and river i feel like he i don't know i i thought he was gonna yeah the old guy i thought he was gonna be horrendous because he was like i talked to my grandchildren about some vocabulary and he was like yolo and i was just hated him hated him right off the bat and he's he's been pretty good so he used one like acronym too and someone didn't know about it and he had to like spell it out for them and they're like oh that's weird and i was like oh crap he's gonna get caught immediately but they didn't like

follow that path at all everyone kind of like loves him so so good oh it's bad but so i don't want to i don't want to give spoilers no It's hard to not give away spoilers, but I want to talk about it. So we just want to say spoilers for season two and we can talk about it? No, because I haven't watched season two yet. I don't want you to spoil it for me. I don't give a shit about the viewers.

Don't spoil it for me. Rooks, have you seen season one? I have two episodes left of season one. Okay, so spoilers for season one then. Everyone's been warned. Rooks, what are your thoughts on season one? It's fucking great. It's so good. It's just

the whole premise of the show is just so smart. Like, just the idea of like, you have no contact with these people. You have to talk to them through text. We do all these challenges, all these things where anonymously you can chirp other people. It's so, so well thought people like it's so so well

thought out it's so good um season one is great i do love that most of the people like aren't catfish because it is cool seeing them just be them and just be like this is me you don't fucking like me like fuck you like i don't know and there is obviously like kiss assing involved and shit like that but it's i think season one is super well done and the lack of catfish makes season one awesome to me because it's just people trying to figure out who they can trust and who they know without all this other like noise season one's very genuine and i feel like people like actually like liked each other at the end season two is a little bit more so far just i don't it's only like halfway through though so i don't know if like people end up actually being like really cool with each other or not season one they like it was tough for

new people to come in that's what i'll say about it because they were so genuine and there weren't that many catfish so it was hard for anyone to break that like initial like og crew barrier and so when these people would come in they'd be like what's all this kiss hasing like why is everyone like best friends with each other but they actually genuinely liked each other? Also, on the people that have came in through season one, it's... I'd say a lot of them are just...

Especially towards the end, a lot of them are kind of not the nicest people. A lot of them, I feel like, aren't people that are going to get along even in the first place. And then they of them, I feel like aren't like people that are going to get along and even in the first place. And then they come in and see this shit.

And then immediately you're just, this is bullshit. Like I'm going to try to do this and this one. It's like the whole reason why all these people are still here is because they're being genuine with each other. And if you just tried it, it would pan out. But I don't know how you come into the show like as one of the

later people and not just be like all right just gotta kiss everyone's butt because i have like four days until the finale so like i have to somehow get ratings i'm gonna tell you all my life story i'm literally gonna tell you i'm gonna write you a novel and i'm gonna have to speak it out to the circle and it's gonna be my name is rooks i'm not a fan of uh choco tacos because i couldn't make weight in middle school for my football team was good so who's your favorite people and like least favorite in season one so far well i was thinking i want to after i finish i i was thinking we could tier list the people from season one okay but you can give us thoughts initially and we can go from there like obviously shoobie's a goat yeah joey in the beginning i hated but he grew on me so hard yeah he turns

joey because joey in the beginning it's like who is this fucking discount paul ed like you buddy like no one says yeah buddy anymore jersey shore hasn't been well i mean good jersey shore hasn't been on television for like 10 years um he's great sammy's fine sammy there's times where she's super like happy and she likes people which i like to see and then there's times where she just hates people like i'm like i don't know why you don't like them but all right her facial expressions are great though because in season one they did this more than season two. Season one, they'll send a text back and be like, oh, I love you so much.

And then you'll see their face and they just give a scowl. They turn around and immediately say the opposite. It's great. Because you've texted like that so many times before where you just have to say something and you don't mean it at all. Well, yeah, that's one of my favorite parts. It's just all the exclamation points, the emo the ha ha ha in all caps and then they're just sitting on a couch like eating fruit just with like a blank face staring at the at the at the screen it's

great they do hashtags for everything i feel like there has to be like a quota that they have to meet where they have to put a hashtag and like hashtag family forever after just being like hey man we both had chicken for dinner and i it's like when i i think i think uh i think i was hearing a tiktok earlier where someone's like one circle and it's what's even the point of hashtags in this do you know what hashtags are for it's so you can see all the people using this hashtag so in this game when you're messaging people back and forth what's even the purpose it's like yeah you know what what the fuck is the point they just had to push that into the show because it's a social media thing obviously

i forget the one girl guy catfishing as a girl from season one rebecca oh seaburn so seaburn dude yeah seaburn is the best seaburn is he is he the one you think doesn't do well at catfishing yeah okay he is he's a few he is and i'm not gonna spoil but he is just like a few statements throughout where he's talking to the girls and it's very obvious that it's oh yeah i do remember it was that thing yeah he's like my left side hurts and the girls like only left side the girls are like i've never heard that before but then also like the first the very first episode so i guess it's a spoiler but he asked on the girls like oh do you think chris is cute and chris everyone's just like he's gay honey yeah everyone just is like what the fuck yeah chris is very

outwardly noticeably like yeah like he just wears a lot of makeup and bright colors and you can tell and but it's oh i love chris chris is awesome too but i i want to i want to like i want to tier list them and i would go more in depth so i don't want to like hit all the characters right now fair fair fair but the circle great fucking show this is not a hashtag ad either we are just big fans of the show we love the show go fucking watch it the best part though we haven't talked about this yet whenever someone gets voted out they get to go meet with somebody yeah and so if like they have a good relationship with one of the catfishes but they don't know that they go and meet them and they walk in their room and they're like hey and

they're like hello and they're like who are you and they're like aren't you this person they're like yeah and it's like oh it's which on that topic brian the last episode of season two that just came out so good it's season two has a lot of twists and turns so many twists in season one was the same because i didn't know like the format for it so at the end of every episode something new happens that you don't see coming and it's they're really good hooked on it i'm hyped for tomorrow the next three episodes come out tomorrow for season two i'm yeah today by the time of this podcast being released but I am hyped

it's a really cool twist I can't say anything more I know more of the story go watch the fucking circle it's a heater certified banger is that our

is that our rotten tomatoes it's like certified it's rotten or it's a banger from the boys here but hey is that our rotten tomatoes it's like certified it's rotten or it's a banger yeah it's a banger if it's a banger that means that's good for all the viewers that's a good thing alright

let's move into we got NFL draft on Thursday arguably one of the best nights of the year. We all, us four, all root for different teams. And we're just going to give, you know, who we want to see get picked up. I'm super curious to see your guys' views. Not really Corey as much, because... Corey's...

I just know what Corey's going to say, but... Hey. See each their own. You guys are GMs. Let's make some picks right now. And I only... I really only broke down a first round pick.

I'm not trying to die. There's so many possible... I was looking at all these fucking mock drafts. There's eight trades in the first round pick like i don't i'm not trying to die there's so many possible like i was like all these fucking mock drafts there's eight trades in the first round it's like relax like calm down um so i was just first round pick who we thinking boys zach go first all right yeah so the i love draft night as an nfl fan i hate draft night as a Bears fan because I just sets me up for disappointment every single time um so the Bears are looking for lots of positions um offensive line uh cornerback quarterback um after we got rid of our the uh uh MVP Mitch Trubisky, the Nickelodeon valuable player who won the Nickelodeon award. Slime child. Yeah, the one and only MVP ever. So we drafted him, so that's a notch on our resume. And the Bears picked 20th.

There's been a lot of speculation and rumors about them trading up, about them making phone calls. So they're not going to get Trevor Lawrence, obviously. They're not going to get zach wilson they're not going to get mac jones um trey lance and justin fields are like the two that might fall um i don't see them falling all the way to 20 there's rumors that justin fields might do that but i think someone will trade up and get him before that happens i wouldn't be mad if the Bears traded up to around like the 12th or 15th spot, but I'm just on the fence of giving up a lot and mortgaging the future with a GM and a coach who arguably both stink at their job and have already gotten one chance to draft a quarterback and they epically failed so i like justin fields i would wouldn't mind them drafting drafting him it's just how they get to the position to draft him that i'm a little concerned the other the other two there's actually a couple of

prospects out of northwestern um a pretty good tackle like a left left tackle or that's pretty good and then greg newsom jr who's a pretty good cornerback that i wouldn't mind either um they're local to the area so those dummies in house hall where the you know the gm they want to go very far to scout them so hopefully they'll actually scout players unlike they unlike back in 2017 when they decided not to scout or um deshaun watson or have dinner with him at all so which might actually be an okay move now, given where he's at. We'll see how that pans out. I don't know. I'm scared, but I'm also very apathetic and just kind of scarred over from the recent draft.

We'll see. It'll be fun. But that's where I see them, what they're going to do. I feel like they have to get a quarterback and but i don't want but i don't want kyle trask i think that guy stinks i do not want kyle trask he stinks i'll take the guy from stanford was it david mills or what's his name he's like a he i'll take him over kyle trask um i don't trust the guy who started it was like couldn't even like make his high school team as a starting quarterback. He was like a JV. He was like a JV quarterback.

So don't trust that. Sounds like the Bears might take him then. Exactly. Exactly. He's looking good, man. I saw on Reddit that there's a, if you follow Joe Flacco's career every year,

the team that beats the Ravens is the team that he ends up going to in the past three or four teams he's been on. And so the only team left that the team he's on now will play, or that the Ravens will play, that he hasn't been on and isn't already a team he's been a quarterback for, is the Bears.

So next year, you're going to have Joe Flacco. So congratulations. It's just destined to happen it was like three years in a row the team that beat the Ravens in like the opposite conference from the team he was on is the team he ended up going to it was really weird

who finds these stats people on red have a lot of time Reddit you find the most random shit Joe Flacco's life though people in red have a lot of time oh yeah reddit reddit you find the most random why are you tracking joe flacco's life though relax because he's a big shut up so the steelers that's the team i root for dollars dollars all your yinzers we're picking at number 24 in the first round got a second round third round rounds, a sixth, and two seventh. So we're in a decent spot.

I didn't know if we had a ton of picks or not this year. But so pretty much this is Big Ben's last year to play. He's been saying that for a couple years. This is definitely his last year. So we have to go balls to the walls, just go for a championship. And we're kind of missing a lot of pieces because Marquis Pouncey retired, so we're missing some O-line. of missing a lot of pieces because marquis pouncey retired

so we're missing some o-line we lost a lot of defensive players just contract wise and just at the end of last year a lot of people got hurt yes sack uh which tiktok star are you going to draft in the room uh charlie d'amelio has a good 40 time but she's a little lightweight, so I don't know if she could take hits. Maybe her sister. We'll see. I heard she was at the Jake Paul basketball event. I'm a big boxing fan over here.

Also, please call her by her preferred name of Chuck D'Amelio. Okay. Let's move on so the Steelers need some line we need some defense but other unless that whoever the really good offensive lineman for the Colts is that was like last year Nelson Quinton Nelson came in and was like an all pro from day one old linemen don't really show up year one and that's what we need and then same with defensive Quinton Nelson came in and was an all-pro from day one. O-linemen don't really show up year one, and that's what we need. And then same with defensive players.

You can get a stud and he'll be pretty good year one, but it takes a couple years for them to become really, really good. The only position that you can come in day one and be a star is running back. There's always a rookie running back every year that will put up 1,000 yards. And the Steelers had the worst rushing offense in the league last year. And currently our running back core is Benny Snell, Anthony McFarland, and Kalen Balazs, who are all very average. So all the rumors on who the Steelers are drafting is running back. So it's either going to be Alabama's Najee Harris or Clemson's Travis Etienne,

which I'm fine with either of them because we do need a stud running back and that's the one piece that we could pick up in the draft that would actually make a big difference and if we're just trying to win that's what you have to do like for the rest of as soon as Ben retires and then we move on from there we're screwed we got to really draft a quarterback or three and hope one works out and the Eagles might have some extra at that point. Dude, I would take Jalen Hurts. I wanted them to draft him last year, and they didn't.

So hopefully he has one bad year with you guys, and then you trade him over. That'd be sick. Appreciate it. But so running back first round, O-line second round would be sick. Sorry to interrupt, Corey. Do you see that they officially said Jalen Hurts? They're not naming him the starter yet.

Like it was like an official statement they're like no jalen hurts isn't our starter yet yeah want to know i'll go next brian is that all yep so cory's over here fuming like they the eagles is my team which i think most people don't but they like they're horrendous at drafting, one. Not only are they bad, they... They're bad. I think they pick opposite what they want, like the fans want them to pick and what the team needs.

Like, it's hard to go into this draft as the Eagles. And like Zach was saying, they have so many holes to fill that if they don't pick or they don't need a running back they don't need a quarterback they don't need a tight end they don't need defensive line if they draft legitimately and I it's okay kicker and putter if they don't draft any of those players positions I'll be happy this that's the bar i'm setting for this team is cory wasn't happy it's it's that low and i'm still extremely nervous because i don't i still don't even know if it was a good sign that they traded down and got like a pick for next year because

i think oh cool like they trust jalen hurts which they should to give them the starting position for this year which news to me rooks didn't hear that but again not shocked and then i'm like well but then they got a first round an extra first round pick for next year so it may be like insurance if he doesn't pan out and then they might use it again next year for a different quarterback or something and And I've still seen rumors saying, oh, don't be shocked if quarterback's still on the board for the Eagles. And it's like, why? Why does that make any sense?

I want Devontae Smith. And if he somehow falls, I would be surprised. But Parsons, make a Parsons. We need a linebacker, and we have always needed receivers. So the day I die, we will need receivers. So keep on drafting them. Hey, man, when you had Deshaun Jackson and Jeremy Macklin at the same time, your receiving core was good.

Yeah, they were good, but that's been so long. It doesn't feel that long, but then I look back, I'm like, well, that was 12 years ago. Yeah, Jeremy Macklin is a fucking throwback. You said that name said that name and i was like bro when was the last time that dude played bro he was on the chiefs like he's on the chiefs a few years ago yeah but i'm saying i'm saying him on the eagles though him on the eagles when the fuck was that yeah cory had some fantasy championships with him man cory isn't um doesn't has howie roseman not drafted a pro bowl pro bowler uh i don't know what year he came in the only one i can think of that has been good

was lane johnson i know he was a pro well miles yeah so i guess mile but he wasn't in the first round if that's zach's stat if it's like a first round oh here here it is i think it's in 2013 the eagles drafted lane johnson and zackard since then howie roseman's draft headland of the exact eagles exactly one pro bow player and that's carson so it is so bad i wish i pulled up the list of all of their all of their draft picks but their their first rounders are not good i guess um bart derrick barnett is the next one i can think of that's actually not bad i wouldn't say he's great but he's not bad i mean he had like the super bowl winning play in 2018 but and he's been but

again injury problems like anyone who's kind of good injury problems it's it's so annoying but i digress my rant is over it's time for the other birds i'm a cardinal i'm a cardinal span there's no way cardinals make that noise but it's cool so i would just like to say first off super super blessed that i do not have to worry about fucking quarterbacking drafts. The years of doing that, the many, many years of Josh Rosen, of 97-year-old Carson Palmer, John Skelton, dude. John Skelton. I'd just like to say I'm super blessed that Kyler's here. He's here to stay.

We made a lot of moves in the offseason. There are three kind of areas that have tons of first-round depth that I want us to go, and that's O-line, cornerback, and linebacker. Our O-line last year sucked so much ass we had two i've never seen this in the nfl we had in two separate games a guard false start or hold on the one yard line that led to a safety that it was called a safety because they held or false started or something like that i saw it twice this year are you fucking kidding me but so there's so much there's so much depth at o-line um there's the dude from usc

vera tucker derisal from virginia tech the one i want though is tevin jenkins at oklahoma state if you see this dude you're like like he just looks so goofy he's wearing like glasses in his picture he looks so funny and i watched this guy um it was a random recommended youtube video to me it was breaking down his blocking and he's just a beast like he's violent he's a great pass blocker we need we need help on the line. Freaking Steelers boy, Marcus Gilbert just retired. Marcus Gilbert got hurt in like preseason. His first season with the Cardinals, didn't play a game.

Bro, he was hurt on the Steelers all the time too. He didn't play and then he announced his retirement today. It's like, hey, thanks man. You did a great job. Congrats. But we just, with how our offense is looking we now we need to protect kyler we need to protect kyler at all costs because towards end of season last year we saw what happens when he's getting hit over and over again

he's time he's a little boy and i love i love that little short game baby i love that man's but he's not the largest but corner corner, especially with Pat Peete leaving, we only have Byron Murphy. So Byron Murphy's a god. Byron Murphy's a slot corner. Our two outside guys, we had Drake or Patrick last year. That man sucks. And Drake or Patrick, if you're listening,

which I know you are, I love you because you're a dog and you just chirp at everybody, but you can't give up nine catches and then break up one pass and flex on the guy that you broke the pass. Like, you can't do that. And I know that's cornerback mentality, but you can't do that. But I would love, I mean, I don't think there's any shot Sertain from Bama falls to 16, but he's like, he's the goat.

I love the dude from South Carolina, J.C carolina jc horn jc horn's a beast that man's a lot i don't he's another one too that like i've seen i've seen him from like eight all the way to like 25 so who knows the big one i want to look at though is farley from uh virginia tech farley shout out another deep cut but farley from virginia tech so he's coming off back surgery and he opted out this year so he was gonna be like the number one corner out of this class but it's obviously his stock dropped what was this surgery do you know it was back it was on his back but like which is what i just i just saw the get back they replaced his back 2020 whole new back end um but i want i could follow farley i could fucks with them cardinals right now we're i don't think injury

prone is a worry for us right now with who we've picked up on the fucking off season i don't think we're worried about that i think we're just selling out for possibly a big year um linebacker too oh my god linebacker needs to be addressed because jordan hicks is just you're welcome jordan jordan hicks he can't cover a he can't cover anything he is he is a lost child some his parents need to come pick him up anytime there's a pass play this man is just wandering around and fucking la la land and we i am dying in his blood i know facts um but we need we need it we really need it i don't the last time we had a silent linebacker that i can think of was like daryl washington or carlos dance view which was fucking ages ago but i love i mean somehow michael parsons falls to 16 like because i the thing that's crazy and i think about this with isaiah simmons last year i was

like there's no shot isaiah simmons makes a tar pick there's no fuck i didn't even like consider him and then he was there we took him i was like draft night anything can happen boys but if parsons somehow falls to us i won't fucking parsons like i was the best linebacker on the board by far right yeah so but um if we don't get parsons i like i like the dude from notre dame better um owusu how the fuck do you say this name? Whatever. Manti Teo. Yeah, Manti Teo. But he's like a super small... He's like a smaller athletic dude. And then there's the guy from Tulsa. It starts

with a Z. I think Zavon? Zavon? Whatever. But he's like the polar opposite. He's like 260 pounds playing backer. He's huge. But he had like the polar opposite. He's like 260 pounds playing like backer. He's huge. But he had like eight interceptions. So I'm like, I don't know who to believe in.

You know what I'm saying? What conference is Tulsa in? The SWAC. Like Sunbelt? The American maybe? I don't know. Maybe that's why he had eight interceptions. Yeah.

I mean, yeah. He's fucking huge though. And he has sacks and shit too. I don't know. Maybe that's why I had interceptions. Yeah. I mean, yeah. He's fucking huge, though. And he has sacks and shit, too. I don't know. But all I want is for us to address these positions. I saw a mock draft picking Najee Harris. If we pick Najee Harris with James Conner and Chase Edmonds, we're on drugs. Clint Kingsbury is doing way too much blow blow talking to way too many owners about this shit

we we need to address these and i've i've been seeing a lot of stuff about us looking at receiver it's like receiver is not our issue right now receiver is not a problem but like late in the draft it's just like a fifth rounder no i know there's first round shit people people are saying we need to be looking at receivers, and if receivers aren't on the board, we need to trade down. I was like, fuck no. I completely disagree with that. You guys got like Steve Preston, John Brown, John Brown,

David Boston. You guys got some players. But especially with us picking up AJ, it's like Hawkins, AJ, Christian Kirk. I think Fitz hasn't said anything, so I think he's still good. We don't need to get another guy to throw in the mix. Are you worried about drafting Cuba Gooding's character

from Jerry Maguire? Rod Tidwell. No. But hey. Sounds like a name that's going to be on the list. That is a great segue into our draft.

So, the Boyos, we are going to draft our fictional football teams. So what that means is we're picking players from any form of media who were using a football. It's super general. You'll see.

All of mine come from podcast football players. You said any form of media, right? Who's sharing their screen right now? Oh, Zach. He's sharing the order thank god um i thought everything just broke yeah no i was about to be so mad um but as we go you'll see what we mean by that but we're all drafting a quarterback a running back a wide receiver a defensive player and then a wild card athlete so zach if you would if you would like to share your screen and show us the draft so i can see myself getting the fourth pick that would be

lovely absolutely this is great podcasting right here you're gonna do like the audio play-by-play you just have to say oh blankly oh my screen doesn't have share so the other rule was you can't pick people in movies that played different sports to play. Yeah, that's another thing, too. You can't pick someone from a basketball movie and be like, oh, but he would be great at football. It has to be. But you can pick somebody who's a dual sport athlete, one of them being football. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

That's fine. Cool. All right, let's get this over with. All right, randomize this shit. Let's see it. Rooks last being football. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's fine. Cool. Okay, ready? All right, randomize this shit. Let's see it. Rooks last, rooks last, rooks last. Let's go. Corey last.

Second. Oh, no. Get fucked, loser. All right. All right, so first overall pick is the Bry guy. Bry guy, where are we going? I think this is rigged because I think I've had first a couple times in a row.

So I'm looking at my list. Receiver is my shallowest, but the person I have picked number one overall for my receiver, I don't think you guys are going to pick. So I'm going to move on from that. My athlete category. I got one guy that I really want. So. I got one guy that I really want so first overall pick in the fictional football draft

Pablo Ramon Sanchez the backyard football league are you fucking kidding me are you fucking kidding me that is so good not even the best backyard player he is by far are you joking he's really his stats blocking but he's

he's one foot tall i fucking hate you i fucking hate you he's got like special talents he can like you know get like the upgrades he can like tunnel underground and stuff are you shitting on pablo sanchez right now he's universally like the best person to come out of the best athlete to come out of the backyard sports franchise are you joking bro so he plays in the backyard football league which has pros in it like drew vries playing real talent yeah he's a little undersized but he's really really fast, can catch the ball, and throw. He's going to be our gadget player, perfect for the athlete position. I'm so pissed. I fucking hate you.

Off the board. Let's go. I fucking hate you. All right. Second overall pick. You know, one wins championships. Defense wins championships. Special teams. championships defense offense championships uh special teams the second overall pick in the fictional football draft i'm getting the water boy bobby boucher welcome to the squad i don't

even i don't even need to say much man he's the fucking he's the water boy dude he led he led the scls you mud dogs the bourbon bowl to a victory man i mean he essentially is playing offense for them with all those turnovers and have you seen have you seen the scls you mud dogs roster it's not good they got a coach that can't speak they got another coach who's literally terrified of everything. And guess what? Bobby Boucher put the team on his back, rallied them together, got awesome grades

as well, led them to the Bourbon Bowl. He doesn't know what a Madula Obligata is, though. Hey, he figures it out. Eventually he figures it out. Second overall pick, Bobby Boucher. Lock it up. Crocodile it out. Second overall pick, Bobby Boucher. Lock it up. Crocodile have all them teeth but no toothbrush.

So ornery. Bobby Boucher like them boobies too. That is true. He likes boobs. That's a bonus. Who's up? I think I'm up. Alright, I'm going to pick the most important position which is quarterback. I'm going to take Michael Vick from Madden 2004. No. What?

No. No. That's not how this shit works. I'm taking the video game version. That's not how this shit works. They're not real football players. That's not how this works. No.

Fictional. Fictional. Dude, I would literally just go in and pick five guys from Madden. Yeah. No. All right. Fine, it's no fun. I'll go to running back slash fullback, and I'm going with my boy Tim Riggins. Yeah. Bitch.

Quick aside, Tim Riggins is the only good part about Friday Night Lights, the show. Everything else, the movie's way better in every other aspect. If they could somehow put Tim Riggins in the movie, it would be it. That movie would be up there with The Godfather and Shrek in terms of top movies. So Tim Riggins won because he's just a beast in the football field. He pulls, obviously. He can work on trucks. That's kind of cool.

He's a bad boy. There's also like variations of Tim Riggins that I appreciate. There's there's mechanic Tim Riggins. There's sweaty Tim Riggins. There's a shirtless Tim Riggins that I appreciate. There's mechanic Tim Riggins. There's sweaty Tim Riggins. Shirtless Tim Riggins. There's wet Tim Riggins when he's out in the rain and he's like, yeah, I'm going to run home from this bus that's broken down.

There's church Tim Riggins. What other? There's some more. Tim Riggins, you can cover... What's the name of his company he's like rigging rigs or whatever great name riggins rig a great name for for uh you know for an auto mechanic that's also probably laundering money because his brother doesn't know how to stay out of jail um but other than that uh yeah tim riggins is like is uh gonna be great uh as my running back slash fullback slash halfback. Fuck you.

Didn't he play defense too? Or am I imagining? Probably. No, he played fullback. I thought he played a couple plays at defense. Maybe. I don't know. I haven't seen that series in fucking ages.

Yeah, I haven't seen it in a while. All right. All right, Corey. Bring us home. First round pick. I'm going for my quarterback position i'm picking uncle rico no god he can toss all pigs get over the mountains my god that's far that's a far distance i mean that's the whole field like i'm so guess what play we're running when we're on our own one. Verts, baby.

Send it. He can toss it. Hot route. Hot route. Exactly. And I'm shocked you guys would let me get him at the last pick in the first round. It's kind of disgusting. I got other QBs.

He's on my big board. And you know what? Because I have the next pick as well, because we're doing Snake, right? We're Snake at back. Yeah, of course. My one-two punch, baby. Give me Forrest Gump at running back. My man was an All-American.

I hate you. He was an All-American. And he didn't even know what he was doing. Put him in the league. Put him in the show. Put, like, a little professional coaching, maybe. And he's in the league put him in the show put like little professional coaching maybe and he's in the pros i think you know i think he's setting records i would have to say already you think you think forrest gump could remember an nfl size playbook yeah no that's that's a huge

assumption i'm saying one he doesn't need one, if he happens to learn one other play other than run the ball straight, and you know what? At the end of the day, if he doesn't even learn it, I don't care because it works every time. And if he can't, you know, say we're struggling running the ball. We're handing it off. He's only getting five yards instead of his typical hundred, you know? Just let Uncle Rico chuck the ball, baby.

More like Forrest Dump. What a bad pick. That's such a solid one, too. No, I love Forrest Grump. He's on my list. I didn't think anyone was going to actually think of that. Yeah, Prince, Prince, and Boo when he literally had him on his big board.

I play both sides, so I always come out on top. Zaddy's turn now, right? No, it's back up. Oh, yeah, no, it is my turn. It is my turn. All right, so because you didn't let me pick who I wanted to for my quarterback, I'm going to go with my guy Sunshine from Remember the Titans. Sunshine, Sunshine.

He's another one, dude. You can throw a pigskin a quarter mile. Dude, he from Remember the Titans. Sunshine, Sunshine. He's another one, dude. You can throw a pigskin a quarter mile. Dude, he can throw a pig. Rev taught him how to run the option. Ever since that, they led him to the championship game. Then Rev came in for the sweet reverse. And Sunshine was laying those blocks on those DBs and linebackers. So you got to have a quarterback that's willing to throw his body out on the line.

Are you going long hair, Sunshine, or are you going fresh cut? I'm going to go, well, fresh. Yeah, I'll go with long. No, I'll go fresh cut sunshine because he led them to the championship. He had a long hair sunshine, long hair Tim Riggins. You keep the flow. Oh, my God. Yeah, that's true.

Your team is fucking, dude. Yeah, my team is flowy. My guy's doing yoga in the front, you know, down in wherever they are, North Carolina. He's doing yoga in the front lawn and everyone's like, what they are, North Carolina. He's doing yoga in the front lawn. And everyone's like, what is what is that guy doing? So he's just he's Sunshine, baby. And so, yeah, I'm I'm having a really hard time finding flaws in my team right now. Sunshine, Tim Riggins.

We're pulling at the very least. We are pulling. All right, man. Brooks, I got I got a toughie here because I don't. Oh, shit. Brooks, you're up. I got a toughie here because I don't – Oh, shit. All right. I think I got to lock up my receiver.

Oh, no. I got to lock up my receiver. It's my – I have the least number of picks here for receiver. I'm taking the wide receiver out of Penn State. Hangle McCringleberry, baby hangel mccringleberry baby hangel mccringleberry this dude is a fucking this dude's a performer man he gets in the end zone not one not two but like 14 thrusts in that bitch that man literally is a fucking walking walking television show he's he was in the east west bowl as well huge accolade to get it's a lot of flags though because he's double he's triple

pumping on this playing with guys like jamarius tech theratrix who else is gonna step up like hang on a cringer bar he's ready for the big time and you know penn state alma mater gives me extra points i'm going to hang on crinkleberry a wide receiver lock it up i'm so mad that i didn't think of that at all that's such a good like sort of not really deep cut but for this kind of receiver for me was i don't i had no clue Pablo Sanchez was going to be my receiver Because I was like I don't know who else to put here Don't worry I'm picking receiver next

It's going to be great You want to get a run down of this? With the receiver I'm picking player of a different breed Might have A little bit of hip dysplasia issues We're going Air Bud. Brian, I hate you.

Oh, no. You want to talk about teaching somebody a playbook? Air Bud's not going to know anything. Bro, you got four legs to run on, catch the ball in his mouth. Dude, he was going to... Run past every one of you. He was going to catch all those balls

thrown past the mountains for me, man. Dude, me and you have the exact same big board and i don't like it the two that you picked were gonna be my other two that i picked for like that's my whole team already so i'm super i'm getting screwed over quick right now and i don't like it what's your uh what's your situation on vanilla pudding cups though brian you got enough vanilla pudding cups does airbud eat vanilla pudding cups yeah that Brian. You got enough vanilla pudding cups? Does Air Bud eat vanilla pudding cups? Yeah. That's the whole... Oh my gosh. So you tell me...

I don't think I've ever seen Air Bud. You've never seen Air Bud, but you pick him? What a dishonest pick. Viewers, I hope you know that this man picked Air Bud without seeing a single Air Bud. Do you know that he's a dog? What kind of dog is he, Brian? What kind of dog is Air Bud? I have a fun fact for you. Answer the question. Hold on. Hold on, hold on.

Did you know the original Air Bud died of synovial sarcoma, which is a rare form of cancer? Yo, shout out. That fact was so fun, man. I appreciate that. Yes. Try to keep it light. We have to have fun on this podcast.

Dog cancer, baby. Perfect. Great. The best kind. Nobody's talking about it. We're the only podcast, Brayman. We're tackling all the difficult topics we were originally a tech podcast now we're a medical podcast

dog medical not even vet only dogs and only cancer we're being really specific any dog cancer drugs that need to be advertised for you get two right I get two Dog cancer drugs that need to be advertised for. Okay, no. Move it on.

You get two, right? I get two. Defense. It's looking pretty thin for me. The only people I could really find were actors that played defensive players in movies that were just NFL players. But I want to go that route. So, be the best, maybe the dumbest, but definitely the best,

biggest frat, douchebag linebacker I possibly think of. Going Kevin, Thad, Devlin, Castle. Damn it. That's like a pick. He's on my wildcard list.

Not as your defensive player? Nah, Bobby, Bobby, you're shaking. Come on. Oh, that's fair. Well, like, you could have multiple people on a list.

Come on. Thad, Castle. He might bring our IQ on our team team down a little bit but we also have a dog on our team so like it might it might be pretty easy we're not gonna be learning the playbook very well on my team but we'll figure it out we'll play on instinct and my and pablo knows spanish and i don't know if he can speak english so like look we're going all on instinct here all right it's gonna be great all right rooks you're up i got this next pick so i need a running back all right i was gonna go qb but there's no shot you guys are picking my qb there's no fucking way in hell you guys are picking Mikey B. So, running back.

Did y'all ever see the movie The Little Giants? No. I'm going with Spike, dude. I'm going with Spike. That man at age like eight lifted a whole fucking refrigerator by himself. That man literally on field was trampling kids. That is the energy I need out of my running back. All right.

I need a badass motherfucker at running back. I was gonna get... I was thinking of doing Stone Cold from the Longest Yard. Two races for me. Couldn't do it. But Spike... Spike... Spike has the same attitude, but...

We can get that. We can work that part. We can teach him to not be a shitty person right and at the end of the movie like he's a little bit less shitty so he's already growing you know what i'm saying but a child that can live the child by himself lock it up it's worse than racism you know how many points he put up on the Little Giants? Oh, fuck, Tom. And you know who was on the Little Giants? The freaking Icebox, man.

He got outside of the Icebox and got in the end zone. That doesn't happen. And with that being said, I am drafting Icebox, Becky O'Shea as my defensive player, because she actually won the goddamn game in the Little Giants movie while Spike's a big-ass loser. Hey, Spike had no help.

Spike... Okay, first of all, Icebox is a 10 times better nickname than spike spike's the name for a dog sounds like he's running with hair but i'm brian's team i would i would like to say spike is not his nickname his name is just fucking spike that's badass as shit no not true not no when your name is ice but nickname is ice icebox becky Becky Icebox. Basically, that's saying she's going to kill you and stuff you in an icebox. That's basically what I interpret that as. And then Spike will pick up the icebox and run with it. While he's dead. No.

But yeah, I'm taking the actual winner of that game. Also, putting a woman on my team shows how progressive I am. Women can play defense, offense, and football. So, shout out to me. Also, your third player with long hair. I love it. Yeah. We're keeping it going. So, the hair's just going to be flowing out the helmets

on Zach. Team flow. If you don't pick two more players with long hair. I know, I'm scrambling right now just to pivot my last two. Just Google every football character from a movie with long hair. C word. You got two, chief. Oh, I'm up.

Okay. Welcome to the podcast. I blacked out for a second. I don't have that many players left. I'm struggling over here. All right. Who do I want? Who do I want?

My defense is looking real thin i'm gonna go with julius campbell from the titans feel like it's a pretty pretty good lockup linebacker i'm pretty sure no dn dn is it yeah and uh you know solid solid pick it's that position's going i gotta feel it it's not what i wanted to do right now but i have to do it for the sake of not having anyone play defense on my team you're not picking up brian gosling a corner my man's ability and for my second pick for my next pick it's not next pick, I guess not second pick, I'm going Deacon Moss for receiver. Oh, that's a good pick.

Michael Irvin legitimately played in the NFL. You're getting Michael Irvin. I'm going to lock that up real quick. You're getting Michael Irvin with a prison edge. It's a tough pick. I feel like him and Uncle Rico are going to have a lot of chemistry too. I see that. I see them get along really well uncle rico might have spent some time in prison too so exactly oh yeah um i just have one one thing about ryan gosling at corner real quick dude was number 48 if if a corner lines up across from anybody and they're number 48 they're getting

burned they're getting toasted there's no reason for you to be a cornerback if you're number 48 i digress all right i really wish i picked ryan gosling now what's your fourth player with long hair gonna be i know i'm i was actually kind of scrambling um all right i'm gonna see if you guys will allow this. I'm going to pick Chassidy Morales. She's a wide receiver and cornerback for the Austin Acoustic Lingerie Football League. No, but no. That's not fiction.

That's not fiction. That's not fiction. Well, I mean, let's be honest here. No, it's not fiction. It's not. That doesn't count. you guys are no fun what a fucking random dude how did you how did you pick her because i know you're googling right now so were her stats the best like i literally typed in lingerie football player lingerie football league

players and the top 10 were just listing i'm'm a little ashamed. It's the top hottest Laundry Football. I scrolled until I found a wide receiver. Yeah, no. That does not fucking count. Oh, man. Pick a girl from Backyard Football. No, I'm going to go away from my... I'm going to stay true. I'm going to go away from my Long Hair Flow team.

I'm going to go with wide receiver. I'm going to go with my guy Ernie Steele. Ernie Steele. That's a good one. From Backyard. Nicknie steel nickname is funny bones he has five out of five footballs in catch funny guy in the catch radius his birthday is april 21st so happy late birthday to my guy ernie big ernie living it up and then also i would abuse when i would play this game abuse the flood route with ernie steel just like just like deep outs to the corner, first downs automatic. So Ernie Steele, reliable, catch radius, unbelievable.

You know, I'm getting good talent here for my fourth pick. I like it, I like it. It's a good one. All right, Corey, you need a QB, or not Corey, Rooks need a QB and an athlete. QB and athlete. So I'm going to say QB for last.

My athlete is going to say QB for last. My athlete is going to be Sack Lodge, Bradley Cooper from Wedding Crashers. Absolute monster on both sides of the ball. Absolute monster. He can catch. He can run. He can fucking hit. Big tree fall hard, baby. Like, how many times did this man lay vince vaughn out

in one sequence and vince vaughn is a big guy vince vaughn absolute laser show of an arm but guess who put him on his ass sack rocket rack lodge yeah you know in sack lodge he's kind of a dickhead you know he's kind of an, but I think at the end of the day, he's going to be a great addition to the team. He's a plug and play. He can play at any spot on the field. I'm going with sack lodge. Wait, what the hell is his actual name?

I think I'm pretty... Sack? I think it's sack lodge. Zach. I looked at this. are you saying sack or zach sack yes on yeah dude on on like the cast on google it says bradley cooper sack lodge yikes all right shout out to my boy sack Zach. That's a nightmare of a first name. Whoa. It says it on IMDB too.

Got me nervous. So, I'm saving my running back for last even though I get two picks in a row, but I'm going to save him for last because it's going to be a fun one. QB though. We got to get another player for Friday Night Lights. We're going Vince Howard, Michael B. Jordan.

Breakout roll. St start of a player jump the shark garbage team garbage team put the team on his back actually won some games dude turns into apollo freaking whatever creed in the next movie he's in dude's a beast i'm combining all his movie universe things together into one so he has a lot of talents yeah it's all fictional right it's definitely how that works i mean i was gonna draft keanu reeves as shane falco and say he has like the whole matrix thing going but we're gonna stick with this howard definitely not how this works but it's always all right so my team's coming together vince howard brought our iq up a little bit but i'm gonna bring it back down a little bit more so we're looking at running back we need someone

who can avoid some tackles we need to get someone who can do a little a little bit of this a little of that a little avoid left and right so i'm thinking of someone who might be two-dimensional who could just turn to the side a little bit you're missing a tackle stop we're going charlie brown running back i was telling my cube made at work about this and he's like you should draft charlie brown i was like man that's a great freaking idea a fucking pick a fucking two dimensional person god damn it i also i feel like he doesn't talk in complete sentences so my team my team name is going to be a team cte and our logo is just going to be a brain that's kind of falling apart oh shit were we supposed to prepare team stuff no but i figured it out as i was going

because my team's iq is so low So I got the best team so far. Everybody can suck it. Rooks, round it out. What's your fifth bet? All right. So one spot missing on my team. It's the moneymaker. It's the QB.

All right. What I need out of this guy is i need someone that can complete passes all right i need someone that throws dimes 100 completion percentage have any of you guys seen the room and not the disaster artist oh no no no the original one no i have not no i am picking johnny from the room because they have multiple scenes in the movie where they're tossing the pigskin no drops none at all dude west coast leader he can throw on the run there's one scene where him and mark are literally running parallel to each other and throwing the football back and forth for like eight minutes. How many drops are in that scene?

Zero. How many cuts are in that scene? Zero. That is the consistency I need on my team. Dude's a movie star as well. Big time movie star. At the quarterback position. My team is done.

They've got Bradley Cooper. My team is done. It's over it's i think your team's iq is pretty low as well we're going for heavy hitting hey dragging my team down a little bit too hang on mccringleberry went to penn state but he got spike who's like in third grade bobby boucher who like acts like he's in third grade. He ended up being smart. He passed the high school exam or whatever. Yeah. It's high school.

We're a great football team. All right, fuck off. All right, Zach. Zach, who you got? All right, so I have an athlete next. And it was between either... I was going to choose The Rock rock from the movie the game plan where he finds out he has a daughter uh but i'm going to instead go with uh my boy ricky jarrett

from ballers yeah so he's he's he's like just trying to prove himself uh you know it was with the green bay packers the worst team in the nfl and then decided to try out you know maybe kind of get in trouble a little bit do a little cocaine a little cocaine maybe a little drug guy but you know he's gonna you know we just need him as like a wild card we used to do this little slot receiver next lines up next to ernie steel in the slot you know we just need to give him catch him a little five yard in routes from sunshine tim riggins dude i like our team our our team is definitely pulling. You know what? Our team, we're team pulls, and our logo is whatever the Laundry Football League logo was.

That's our... That sounds confusing. Wait, Rooks, so give your team a name real quick. Let Corey go. I got to think about it. I got to piece this together. Okay, okay, okay. Corey, round it out.

All right, so i have athlete left i'm going with channing tatum from 22 jump street okay my man that's a great animal shit i don't have to explain myself he's just a freaking animal i was and i was gonna so i didn't view this i didn't read the text that quick that closely so i didn't see like athlete i was seeing like i didn't view this i didn't read the text that quick that closely so i didn't see like athlete i was seeing like i don't know like flex like random player or something yeah and i had brucey originally as that because i was like i was like random player you know there's some trick plays in there he's gonna crush it crush it. But I was like, as an athlete, he is a liability. That is not who you want as your athlete.

Oh, I love it. How many times have you seen the movie step up? That's the real question. Uh, maybe once. Not a fan. I'm more of a step up to fan.

Personally, New York. Oh, step up for Channing Tatum finds his glasses. personally. Boston, New York. Step up four, Channing Tatum finds his glasses. Randomly thinking about it. In 22 Jump Street, when he's on the football team,

it's Captain America. Yeah, Zook, dog. I just thought about it. Yeah, Zook is Captain America. I just pieced that shit together. He's also in Goon. Zook for bazooka. My mind is fucking blown right now. He's also in Goon. My mind is fucking blown right now. He's also in Goon.

He's the main bad guy in Goon too. Yeah. With Doug Glatt. I can't believe they made a second Goon. Doug Glatt. Can I pick Doug Glatt? The first one was fantastic. The second one was still not bad.

Well, your mother. Do you have any? Do you have any more Percocets? Then stay away from my Percocets. Yo, High Key, my team is better than all your teams my team would fuck your guys team up bro spike is going to do a dog and a 2d cartoon in the same play i was gonna say like maybe you know maybe i'll go into madden like give true stats to all these people and let them play out but like like fucking Charlie Brown and fucking air bud, how the fuck is that going to happen?

Chuck Brown. It's the possible Chuck. So Corey, what's your team name? You got uncle Rico, Forrest Gump, Julius Campbell, Deacon Moss,

and Channing Tatum. Can I go last? I feel like I just routed by now. All right, we got Rooks left then. Actually, instead of... Super... Oh, go ahead. I was going to say, instead of...

I'd like to keep our name as Team Poles, but I'd like to change our logo to a goose. Like, similar to my house honkers for Game of Thrones. I just want it to be a goose with a football helmet on it. It could be a goose with a football helmet on it. Okay. Thank you. We're going to... I'm going to get a little with a football helmet on it. It's going to be a goose with a football helmet on it. Okay. Thank you. I'm going to get a little similar to a current

NFL team, you know, the football team. I kind of like that. We're going to be the football boyos, okay? And then our helmet is just going to have a football on it. Like, it's just we play football. That's what our team's going to show the crowd. Sports, sports exactly football boyos

so creative really proud of you although i know that's gonna take a while to really draw up it took me so much time to think about holy shit all right cory we gave you a solid like 15 seconds trying to go channing tate yum's bubbleg Gump Shrimp. I respect it. He's putting a lot of names together. I mean, it's a really long name. I was in my mind. I was trying to figure out how to shorten it. And I short-circuited, and I just went with the long version.

So what's your logo? Just a shrimp? It's going to be... What is it going to be? Who else do I have? It's going to be Channing Tat tatum but with uncle rico's hair eating a shrimp i just cory i just imagine i just imagine julius campbell on your team saying uh strong side and then no one else responding to your team they're just like what like forrest

gump is running the other direction channing tatum doesn't know like what two plus two equals i think cory's team is the most dysfunctional and that's and brian's team is a dog having a dog in a cartoon character first of all i've been i feel like i have i'm winning i just i don't know what to say i've got like julius campbell's a normal player deacon boss normal player channing tat a normal player. Deacon Voss, normal player. Channing Tatum, normal player. I have Uncle Rico and Forrest Gump, and you guys are just throwing it at me. No, your team's some shit, man.

You'd be all right. I'm really happy with what I put together. I feel like the average age of your team is like 45. So I think my team, I got Pablo and Charlie Brown, who are both like seven, I'd say. So we got youth on our side we're here for like what's the word good time not

a long time here for a long time not a good dynasty the words dynasty multiple years of championship we're here for the next 20 years you're a fucking dog on your team yeah he might die first you know how you know how we shut down air bud

air buds run a fade route bro i take a piece of bacon out of my fucking pocket and just wave it on the sideline you think that dog's gonna keep running i just rub the football with chocolate fucking asshole oh my god, Zach. Not such a golden receiver are you now yet, Mr. Bud? Oh my gosh. Does the back of his jersey say Air Bud or just Bud? Is his first name Air and his second name Bud? I think it says Air Bud.

His second name? His last name? Or second. He's a dog. He doesn't really have a second name or a last name. First name Zach, second name Kirshner. Oh. really have a second name or her last name first name zach second name kershner oh i think it's air but fully on the back of this jersey is it hyphenated though now is it bud comma air no what's his maiden name i don't know it's a good question.

His number is K9, based on Google. Wait, really? I hate that. Are you fucking kidding me? It's Air Bud on the back, it's both. And the team name was the Timberwolves. We didn't ask for the team name. Yeah, fuck the team name, dude.

It's all about Air Bud. Do you have any other facts we didn't ask for? That the original dog died of a rare form of cancer? Yeah. Hey, guys. Super fun fact. I was like, dude, it's like during the Katy Perry episode when Burn's like, oh, I got a fun fact. And it's like, yeah, Katy Perry used to what?

Like sing in like church or something? It was supposed to be like an interesting, unique thing. Yeah. The fact that she goes from like a Christian, like religious artist being like here are my boobs they shoot whipped cream it's like that's a big turn so it happens okay so but hey anybody got any random tidbits i like that word cory tidbits i think we should try to find somebody who can do like a game simulation you know how they simulate the super bowl they should put together all of our teams and simulate and see who actually wins did did i not just say that like you said that cory was thinking of his team name at that moment, I think. We'll cut to his lack.

I did say my brain short-circuited. God damn it, Corey. You fucking asshole. You fucking motherfucker. Hey, but hey. Appreciate y'all joining with us on this beautiful journey that is Wednesday My Dudes. Byrne, how can they get involved? We didn't have one this week,

but usually have a little call in. You yell at us insult our drafts or just insult cory i really insult brian you say insult me or rooks i say insult yeah insult insult any of us except for zach because then zach will like turn it into a segment on the podcast where he's like oh i got bodied again guys and then it gets all sad and emotional but sparrow's gonna call in again but yeah so there's a link at the bottom in the description of every episode that you can click on and then just send a voice message and we'll put in the episode and respond to it greatest five stars give us a review tell me i'm pretty and with that we're out it is wednesday