It’s Wednesday My Dudes - Ep. 21: Zaks Funeral is the Next Big Thing Since Hitlers Funeral. Ft. Tommy

Episode Date: June 23, 2021

Special guest appearance by the one the only Timmy Soggins this week, bringing it live from State College. Tommy gets the hot seat as all guests do, we get into how to throw a rager of a funeral, talk about the weekend shenanigans from the wedding we went to this weekend, and end on some Bachelorette talk for week 3 of Katies season. And oh yeah, Zak is obsessed with Pixar dads. 0:00:00 - 0:06:03 - Intro 0:06:03 - 0:14:58 - Tommy Hot Seat 0:14:58 - 0:29:54 - Funerals 0:29:54 - 0:52:53 - Weddings 0:52:53 - 0:57:14 - Pixar Dads vs Moms 0:57:14 - 1:14:30 - Bachelorette Katies Season Week 3 Rate us 5 stars! Leave a review! Follow us on Twitter @IWMD_Pod

It is Wednesday, my dudes. Welcome back to another episode of It's Wednesday, My Dudes. Got a special guest this week. But first, Corey, how you doing? Shalom. It's your boy. Zach, how you doing? Honk honk. I'm built different. Ew.

Built like a goose. I'm here. I'm Brian. Rooks is out this week down at tejas for some reason but we got a special guest hailing from the town that he absolutely hates mate as he's blowing a vape smoke into the microphone right now might know my tiki siggy might know as everyone's here at sad boy some people call him thomas the stink engine the school threat himself tommy how you doing that was incredible um let me just say that i'm doing fantastic sitting here in a grandma chair um from my parents house live from state college you're right you know not my favorite place in the world but

happy to be here oh i forgot about thomas the stank engine someone knows me as thomas the stank engine aka one person aka steve myers aka he got that nickname two days ago aka aka everyone who listens to this now will refer you as Thomas the Stink. Dude, I hope, man. It's gonna stick. I hope. It's gonna stick.

You forgot his other nickname is Zach's Favorite Bedmate. Ooh. True. And Tome. Thomas. Tome. You got a lot of nicknames, man.

I honestly do. Like, back in high school, no one called me Tommy. It was just random shit. What was your high school nickname? Random shit, you just said. Yeah, that was... Well, the biggest one was somebody, like...

We had, like, a substitute teacher or something, and they called me Timmy Soggins accidentally. So that's, that was probably the biggest one. Oh, that's really good. Oh, that's going to stick.

I'm happy about that. What was your guys? What was your guys' high school nicknames? So my elementary school leading into middle school leading in high school we had five bryans and five ryans in our class so everyone strictly went by last names because there was too many of us in every single class so i just went by mayberry until college where my summer roommate decided i needed a new nickname and was it was like, he's not from the South, but he's like, I went to the South once and I heard these two guys on the side of the street.

And he was yelling at his brother, whose brother's name was Brian. He was like, Bird, come over here. He's like, because of the Southern accent, it sounded like Burn and not Brian. And so he called me Burn. And since it was summer session, I didn't know anyone. He introduced me to everyone we ran into as Burn.

And for some reason that stuck. And it's so dumb because there's no reason for me to be called that and that's stuck for like five years i'm finally getting out of it you love that nickname it's just stupid like if i burnt down a chapel or like a whole campus like sick that's awesome nickname call me burn but it makes no sense if i commit arson then i can inherit the nickname i have to earn the nickname i need a prison nickname if i'm going for like arson charges but they could they should have called you prison brian oh that's it that's it prison brian likes to burn things down my uh out of prison brian likes to play xbox oh high high school i didn't really have any it was

like uh remember when you pick names in like whatever language class you're taking spanish class french whatever mine was pablo so my friends just called me pablo from that like it has it was just the name that i had from spanish class and then in college what was there uh because my yeah pj because that was because of my email right my email growing up was puck junior so then that became pj and then that became peach and then the other one that i forgot about this except this weekend because we're at the wedding with our friends kelly calls me core whore and oddly i think it's a hilarious name and i love it i think she's the only one who calls you core whore but yeah that needs a stick yeah

if anyone wants to make that stick i'm okay with that i am going to start using that for sure that's my boy stank zach what were you calling high school? So it was mostly Milkman. Yeah, that's right. I think mostly in high school it was – like Kirshner is too long of a last name to say. So they shortened it to everything from Kush to Coochie to Kirshner to just anything.

No one ever called me Zach. They shortened Kirshner to Kirshner. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, it was like a football thing. So like they call you the last name, but like you get this one wide receiver guy who's like, what's up, Coochie? How's it going, Coochie?

Like in the halls in front of everybody. And I'm like, what's up, Coochie? Love it. That sticks. That's better than Bird. I'm going to call that our end. Mine's the dumbest out of everybody's here tommy's is thomas the stank that is sick he's not a train that is not a

locomotive you could run a train or two yikes big yikes all right we're going five minutes in we're gonna start saying i'm expecting to expecting Tommy to be a little wild so I need him to pick up the weirdness it's going to happen this is episode 21 right? the episode that we get cancelled you know this is my first podcast ever

I'm expecting it to be my last um burbright alright so Tommy you ready for a little hot seat yes sir so i'm screaming dude if you were an inanimate object, what would you be? Honestly.

I can feel your sweat. You have some lifelines, too. Poll the audience. Call a friend. 50-50. I'd like to use a 50-50 where I get two options. Alright, the options are... The music is so loud. Port-A-Potty?

Aldi Shopping Cart. Um... You know what? I'm going to just say port-a-potty because it kind of keeps it interesting. Why? You have to live the rest of your life as a port-a-potty. Just having people

crap through your mouth. Man, love's getting beat on. Love's getting beat on? I said beat on. I was like, jeez. I mean, but also, who's going to the port-a-potty yikes i'm i'm kind of thinking like hopefully i could be the port-a-potty and jackass where it like

gets slingshot into the air okay so i can say i flew hold on are you going are we going coctagon or like port-a-potty like is he all all eight port-a-potties at once or like what's happening i think you don't be a singular port-a-potty i don't think you can be eight port-a-potties isn't that all one unit though like it's all like one thing right all right we're moving yeah is he that is he is he the handicapped stall he likes the handicapped people taking dumps on his chest? Is there a handicapped port-a-potty? I'm from Cleveland.

Yeah, wait. Is there a handicapped port-a-potty? A handicapped port-a-potty does not exist. Yeah, there's got to be. Have you ever seen one? Isn't that just called a bathroom? Where are the people in wheelchairs supposed to poop at festivals? Just in their wheelchair?

Yeah, just dig a hole in the ground and cut a hole in their seat. That seems inefficient. That seems inefficient. That seems efficient. Are you kidding me? Then you have to get out. It's like camping. You just put a bag, put a bucket underneath,

put a bag around it. There you go. Well, hold on, Tommy. Where do you want to be a port-a-potty? Because port-a-potties have several options. Are you on a construction site? Are you at a festival? Say Kentucky Derby right now. Der are you in a festival right now derby where are you at where's your location of your port-a-potty i would probably coachella okay there would be some there'd be some like kind of

i would hope some hard drug residue coming out of the urine i get a little fucked up this is redeeming the answer slightly it's still ridiculous though drug residue coming out of the urine and I get a little fucked up. This is redeeming the answer slightly. It's still ridiculous though. Yeah, I'm trying to be a port-a-potty so I'm fucked up all of the time. Occasionally get slingshot in the air.

Alright. Alright, you've got good reasons. Next question. In rounds of ten, how many ten-year-olds could you beat up if you had to fight them to the death, no weapons? So ten of them come running at you. Once you kill the tenth one, another ten come at you.

Honestly, rounds of 10 i'd say i can go 10 waves 10 waves 110 year olds no that's the right answer that's the right answer this is my this is my reason i for my future wife who's ever listening to this i fucking hate kids so like i would just channel all the anger i have and just go total beast mode on them tommy's saying so you're just giving me the chance to do this finally yeah we didn't do this question we we didn't judge the passion someone had for the hatred of the kids. We were just strictly using, like, could you do it? We didn't take into consideration the intensity of the joy.

I've been waiting my whole life to do it. How could you not take into consideration the adrenaline and also pure joy someone would get out of doing this? How many punches do you think it would take you to kill a Tendril? I'd have to kill them. Yeah, that's the battle to the death. You're not just going to like, I don't know. Seven.

Lucky number seven. Seven rounds or seven punches to a 10 year old is a lot. Seven punches to the temple of a 10 year old. I feel like can do some serious damage i mean yeah i was expecting you to pick a lower number i okay i'm gonna move on from this i don't really know how hard i can punch i've done like the things at the beach and the arcade games where you could punch really hard you know uh it wasn't great so but again again it was a punching bag not a 10 year old so like the anger wasn't there so so you you want the games at the at the

shore to have a 10 year old's face instead of a punching bag you think that would entice you to get a higher score is what I'm hearing. Yeah, like if you cut out some annoying kid's little brother and taped it to the punching bag, yeah, I would probably double my score. Just change the score on the machine to be like what grade of a kid you could knock out in one punch. I would play that machine a lot.

Oh, yeah. That would be great to see. I don't need a random number from zero to 100 my scale of how good my week went is going to be what grade of kid i could punch kill in one punch all right that's gonna be my new scale coming out all right you need to you need to make this and you need to make this into like a vr game i would buy that so fast. You just beat up kids? This is why they call you a school threat. I'm not a school threat to

elementary school kids. I just think they're annoying. Tommy's like a hitman for other kids. He's like, I'll beat up the bully in your class for fun. He's like, just let me know where they are and I'll kick the shit out of them. At most, it'll take me seven punches. Guaranteed.

I hate kids. I hate annoying kids. But I do hate bullies even more. So you think if you gave me waves of 10-year-old bullies, I could probably get like 15. 15 rounds. 15 rounds of extra

hatred. 10-year-old bullies hatred 10 year old bullies i feel like boys are usually bigger yeah i don't know how that's gonna work out for you uh no emotional uh psychological bull oh okay so like he's gonna be the physical bully of the psychological cyber bullies yeah yeah there it is yeah cool cool cool all right good i think it's funny to make fun of jimmy on tiktok we'll see how funny this is it's gonna be seven punches me punching your face seven times in a row six times and your face it in the floor all right tommy if you were a potato how would you be prepared in the floor. Alright, Tommy. If you were a potato,

how would you be prepared? Mashed. Elaborate. We're talking chives, sour cream, butter, salt, pepper, cheese, bacon bits. Are you getting, are you being skinned beforehand or are we leaving the skin on? Double baked? Chunky? No, I mean,

mashed potatoes, you don't really want the skin. So I'd say I'd get peeled first and then mashed. Good answer. You know, I just, I'm about the people. So I give the people what they want and I think mashed potatoes are the best kind of potato. So I just want to be a people pleaser,aser you know you like mashed potatoes more than like french fries

arguably yeah i mean like i thought we lost you got lost in the mashed potatoes got lost in the mashed potatoes. Got lost in the sauce. That's a tough question, but I think I'd go mashed. Are you sure you don't want to use a lifeline on this one? No, I'm looking at my final answer. My final answer reaches... The corrected only answer there ever is is unplugged, so I don't have to be a burden to my family.

That's the best answer I've ever heard. The heard brutal answer by zach there's ever been given or most real yeah it's it's like a verbal will i just want my you know i don't want any pressure anyone just pull that sucker i hope at your what reading of your will they just play back that episode of the podcast this is what zach would have wanted i you know what i'm gonna do i'm when i if i come to that point i'm gonna start like a tug-of-war contest to build up the strength so when everyone can get on the same side of the cord and pull it at once just tug-of-war between your dead body and the rest of the people no between the cord and the outlet. Oh, of the plug that's keeping you alive.

You're right, correct, of the machine. The iron lung that is keeping me alive. Yo, have you guys seen Million Dollar Baby? I haven't, but I read the plot literally last night because it was trending on Reddit for some reason. That is so weird. So you don't know what happens at all? I i mean there's always something that makes fun of it doesn't she break her neck or something

yeah like halfway through the movie she like breaks her neck and then like convinces her coach to pull the plug basically but i remember i was like 10 or 11 years old and we were at a hockey tournament and we were like well we got time in between games like let's go watch a movie and we watched that and we were all just like fucking traumatized that'll psych you up for a hockey game yeah like I I kind of just want to curl up in a ball and cry instead you didn't get into a circle before the game you should be like all right guys anyone breaks their neck out there you know what to do break it well that reminds me of uh of i think it was a couple weekends ago we were watching the it was like the denmark finland game when christian erickson fell yeah and like two

hours later we were supposed to go to a bar like on a bar crawl and i told my roommate i don't know if i can go on this bar crawl and luckily we found out he was alive okay oh my god i can turn up a little bit but i don't know if i could have you this bar crawl. And luckily we found out he was alive. Okay, I'm like, all right, I can turn up a little bit. But I don't know if I could have. We might have just watched the guy die. Kind of a mood killer. Supposedly he did. Supposedly like his heart fully stopped.

Yeah, they brought him back to life. And like the captain of the team like started CPR like immediately and stuff like that. Like what a brutal thing to see, man. And they played like three hours later. Like they came back and finished that game. I thought they were going to postpone it like days, but it was like only a couple hours. So were fans escorted out, or were there still fans?

Because then I ask, would you stay three hours to see the rest of that game, or do you think watching a guy die slash almost die slash you don't know die convince you hmm maybe we don't see what happens here maybe I don't spend another $20 on nachos well didn't they end up losing too

talk about a bad day yeah they lost 1-0 they lost 1-0 also do you think they sell nachos in where is it Denmark no I feel like they probably just sell like whole potato with a side of salt, and they just chew it. It's not even cooked. Is that a Denmark?

Are potatoes Danish? No, they aren't. That's why they don't know what to do with them. They just have a surplus of potatoes. Of course. They put them on a stick and raw, and they're like, please eat them. Ireland's going to sell something, and they're just crazy over there. They need their stadium food.

Hold on, let me look up. Fries is out of the question. They just say put it on a stick, put some salt on it, call it a day. I'm going to look up Danish stadium food and see what pops up. Is this something that I need? Because I heard about it,

but I haven't seen it. Is this something I should look up or is it really messed up? The dude dying? Yeah, probably not. Yeah, maybe save yeah later use that in private time man when you really need to like when you're feeling really good about yourself see it so that way it only drops you down a little yeah when you need to

get back to baseline just feeling sort of miserable and you're not like feeling okay watch the video i have not actually seen it though so i don't but i don't i care too so raining in a little bit so he uh so mashed potato question next question uh so when you're cremated do you want to be cremated into potatoes then i feel like this was what uh this is going back to what zach was saying of he wants to be a potato when he dies is this a follow-up question to the how you're prepared as a potato i had written down after we said something and now i'm going back to it if you can be cremated into something what do you want to be cremated into cremated into something um jewel pod that would also be kind of tight of course you just smoke yourself

um i mean just sprinkle some of my ashes in a j and just have all my feet all my favorite people pass it around at my funeral i feel like you guys do you guys remember those remember those sticky hands you would get at carnivals where it whiplashes and it would stick to something and you whip it back? Sprinkle my ashes in some of that. That thing's fun as hell. You'll never get tired.

At your funeral, they hand out a sticky hand to everybody. Part of Corey is in each and every one of these. Could you imagine I would love to just be like looking down at everybody's face when they get like but like super prepped up crazy like speech saying like this meant

a lot to him like he just wants to be a part of your everyday life please take one on your way out can we go can we get back can we get back to the looking down thing that's what i said whoever said that i don't know if i showed you this i showed this tweet it was like this is one dude tweeted like rip mom and dad i know you're looking up at me right now and someone commented like looking up and he's like yeah they beat my ass back to a little too much. Back to what Corey was saying.

I picture everyone who put their hand on the casket as it comes down the aisle but no one's touching it. Everyone from the pews are just throwing sticky hands on it. It would be too good. But it'd be an empty casket. It'd be a false casket.

No, no, no. So you cremate the bottom half of my body sprinkle some ashes and then that way it looks like i'm a genie and then or turning into a ghost and then you have the sticky hands hitting the cast this is elaborate i like it though something so something tells me that i will be seeing someone as a client in therapy after they come to your funeral. All I'm saying is a lot of people hope I die before them because my funeral is going to be great. I mean, I'm hoping to die, like, tomorrow. Low key. I need another party to go to. Do you ever notice how funerals always have terrible food?

Like, I know, like, I died and it's sad, but, like, why does the food have to suck? Like, I know the mood sucks. Like, why can't we get some pizza? Do funerals have have terrible food like i know like i died and it's sad but like why does the food have to suck like i know the mood sucks like why can't we get some funerals have food where you go yeah you go to like a little banquet afterwards you go out to get food you don't like there's not like they cater chipotle sometimes the family like hosts it see like i think we need to change that i would definitely cater food in to my like my actual funeral like like in the back in the back room there's just a pile of dominoes a couple papadillas i would go uh is it chilies or is it applebees that does baby back ribs chili i'm going chilies as many bone in styles of meat as i possibly can so it just looks like there's a dead body on the table. Really just psych the people out.

I'm going Corey's direction. Cream ate me from the neck down. You put my head on the end of the table. Then have a bunch of ribs leading down from there. I got it. No, no, no, no, no. They're going to go to the rib place. They're going to go to Chili's.

They all have to eat ribs with their sticky hands no utensils sticky hands what if what if it what if in the uh like speaking of carnival games instead of like the sticky hands like your prize like one of the prizes is just like your ashes some five-year-old no no some five-year-old like tosses some rings and was like congratulations you got this earned this random dead dude carnival idea i want my dead body in a dunk tank and whoever gets uh whoever dunks me gets uh no don't say that brian you're in this bunk tank man we're going back to the sperm bank we're getting them some money there's people whose sperm have not been used they need promotion rooks is gonna be so mad he's gonna be so mad that this is gone the spunk tank comes out what if your dead body's in the spunk tank and you fall in and like the sperm brings you back to life

what do you mean what if um do you go back to life. What do you mean, what if? Do you need to go back to fifth grade biology? That's how it works, right? That's the whole point of it. The spunk take, it was a ploy to think that it was just a promotional idea. Really, we're just bringing people back to life. Great movie plot, guys.

I think we gotta go show this to NBC. I... What I'm hearing is that Great movie plot, guys. I think we got to go show this to NBC. What I'm hearing is that funeral homes in general are just terrible. Like they're so outdated. Why do they have to have your old grandma's curtains, terrible, uncomfortable chairs, terrible carpeting, awful lighting. The flowers, I guess, are okay, but even some of them are kind of terrible.

Like why can't we, do you guys want to start a business of like lit funeral homes with like disco lights and a dj I feel like that makes sense because all the people dying are old people who like that's their style in like another 60 years if it's like our style maybe they are awesome and they have like an arcade in the back in like a dance floor but if that was the case then you would think what were the old parties called sock ops you would think there'd be sock ops left and right with all these funerals but they're not and then that'd be saying like what are we gonna have like edm concerts when we go yes exactly i mean i'm down for everyone i just don't know you're going band or you're going dj wait that was my wedding question let's take a funeral for now I'm going

I'm going live band because we can get a bunch of requests going they can throw my name into the songs to make it a little bit more sad just to make it a little bit more real only songs about people dying get played um and then you don't want black Betty at your funeral just to make it a little more real. Only songs about people dying get played.

And then... You don't want Black Betty at your funeral? I highly doubt that. It'll be Black Brian. Bamberlam. I was just about to say, how is that going to work? Oh, Black Brian. Bamberlam.

All right, Corey. Any of you? Yeah. I mean, you're going to be dead at that point anyway. Everyone else suffers consequences. That's why people make funerals so bad. They just want to torture everyone else who's alive, Any of you? Yeah. I mean, you're going to be dead at that point anyway. Everyone else suffers consequences. That's why people make funerals so bad. They just want to torture everyone else who's alive,

so they just make you sit through an hour-long bad service. Yeah, that's tough because it's like, what do you want out of that? It's like, you're dead, so if everybody's like, okay, what do you want in your funeral? You won't experience any of it, so it's kind of like what do people other people like wait no no here's that so the reason funerals are so sad is oftentimes is because they miss the person that died right i feel like we just need to be terrible to everybody else and that way when we die everyone will celebrate and then it'll throw like a lit funeral you're saying you hold on so you're saying you're just gonna be a dick to everybody

just so that way that you have a bomb ass funeral that is the longest long con i've ever heard in my life and then follow up to that do you think that's why people are mean? It's got to be at least a top three return. I appreciate that. Guys, you know Hitler's funeral was sick. People were hanging off chandeliers, shooting guns in the air, just like making out with random people. Maybe another couple of ten people died because they're playing Russian roulette. There's no rules. I mean, I feel like you can't say that it wasn't a good time. Right, exactly, right?

I'm finding hard things to poke holes in my logic here. So Zach's funeral is going to be the next big thing since Hitler's funeral. Yeah? hitler's funeral yeah so are you saying if you don't name this episode that i'm out you won't see me on this podcast for the time so every time we want to go every time we want to go turn up we just like find someone in the obituary that was like kind of a known asshole? We go celebrate. Yeah. Do you think that instead of wedding crashers, you'll have funeral crashers because they're going to go through the obituaries and find like the person that looks most like a dick?

Well, they did that in wedding crashers. That was like Will Ferrell's part. But I guess he did it more to like he played on the sadness. I think we should play on the hypness. And I think the way you do that is in the obituary you know how it says like loving father uh you know missed son or whatever it's just gonna say like man he had kids uh like it's zero adjectives to describe his like compassion and just like we had to do this for tax purposes no it's gonna say you're gonna want to come to this it's gonna be a good time it's gonna say jeff died he was a man funeral service at this done sticky hands at the door featuring

kago's too chill we need like skrillex we need lots of strobe lights and like machine noises in the background hologram of the dead person that'd be sick oh have you guys seen there's this irish dude who died and it was like on reddit forever ago and he made like an audio tape he was like a stand-up comedian and on the audio tape he like and then he goes like let me out and then it's like a whole like 30 minute speech of him like oh yeah it's around that he's in it it's so funny but like it would be such mixed emotions it's such a weird thing to be like dying laughing at a funeral i'm like oh wait no yeah he's still dead okay all right back to back to real life but that'd be sick so do that but with a hologram just have a whole stand-up set

make fun of everyone roasted them for coming to the funeral oh my god i can see that not to transition to the wedding stuff but i did see um that there is this this funny story on twitter this guy thought he was the best man of his friend's wedding and he thought it would be a funny joke to secretly get married at the same time. His best man speech was

like, surprise, double wedding! And everyone was like, you're an asshole. I'm confused on how he did it. That's awful. He had an asshole i'm confused on how he did it that's awful you like had like a minister just like sneak in or something it's way to mooch on everyone else's money on throwing that party i think it's funny but it definitely is a huge dick i would that guy's gonna have a sick funeral do you yeah because we're all gonna celebrate how much of a dick he was

do you are i think it's have you seen the videos of likes at somebody's wedding then somebody proposes at that wedding do you think that's kind of fucked up because i think that's kind of fucked up yes 100 100 even even things like i've had uh seen videos so like a girl is like graduating college and then the guy proposes it's like i get what you're trying to do to like enhance the moment but you're really just kind of making it about you like dude can you just like wait wait another couple days or something it's strange no yeah that's like number one rule of weddings it's like one don't show up in white if you're wearing a dress two it's like don't also propose because just unless like you talked the bride and groom at a time they're cool with it then sure yeah fair enough all right well on the

topic of weddings brian i'm mad that you already asked this because it was going to be mine because it's a classic. At your wedding, band or DJ? So, I understand why you like DJ because you can kind of just tell them to change it on the fly and do whatever or just not pay anybody and put it on Spotify

and that works. But, big live music fan. If we got all the live bands at penn state that we go to at bars and stuff they all do weddings as well and i know my brother has been to weddings where they've had bands from penn state bars and it's he said it was sick so like you know the set list is already awesome and they play at bars so it's already like good like drinking party music so i would want to do a band if if they could so i prefer live music as well but i do like the idea of any song anytime like i so logistically i'm thinking it would probably be a dj but when we went to penn state like a couple weeks ago what was the the corner brothers was that the name of the group they legitimately played any request the only request that they didn't play was

little sebastian from parks and rec which like i. So if you could confirm that the band knew like that wide of a range, hell yeah. Like I would do band for sure. But even then though, it's like you're going to get covers of songs. So it's like, oh, like Get Low by Lil Jon. Like that's not going to be the same energy. The set list is different, for sure. You're not playing Cha-Cha Slide with drums and an acoustic guitar. It would be strange.

To the left. One out this time. Yeah, I mean, why not? Maybe. Tommy, what do you do with Band or DJ then? I mean, this like a boring answer but basically based on what cory said his logic just kind of like you know getting people to dance and all that stuff i mean my funeral though like i want a death metal band for sure how many times are they going to play uh ram ranch at your wedding over under five oh my god

oh honestly under because future wife shout out shout out if you're listening to this probably would file for divorce like immediately wait at the wedding or at the funeral oh at my funeral at my funeral over I'm smashing me over because I'm dead and I can't suffer any of the consequences but wedding under Corey we have to have Karina sing Ram Ranch

at his funeral oh god it would be like it would be like it would be like a it would be perfect it would be like a really sad opera choir funeral version of Graham Rich

everybody please stand in turn to him 369 Zach put your right hand over your heart. You going band or DJ? I'm going DJ. I prefer the people who originally sang the songs.

Bands are just, I mean, there's too much variables with bands. Now, I will say if you get a DJ that thinks it's all about him, that would suck. And he's like, what's up? It's DJ. DJ, spin the records. I'm like,'s up it's dj dj spin the records you know i'm like what like like shut up man but like all his job is to do is is maybe just do like the transitions that spotify does like the end like slowly transition it and that's pretty much and like we give him a set list of songs yeah i mean that's that's what i'm i agree like if you get a band i

can play a lot but i i like the idea of's all the old people leave. You can turn on like the explicit music and, and get a get a little freaky. So what about the shout out? What was his name? Uh, DJ Ken. So reason we're talking wedding stuff is because he went to a wedding this weekend.

Most of us will not hold on. Hold on. You guys went to a wedding. I was not. You face, you face exactly which we knew you were going to do we knew you were going to do it we first of all congrats noel i know you're listening congrats shout out and we knew you were going to do it actually shout out tommy he knew you were going to do it so note, shout out Tommy. He knew you were going to do it. So note for the viewers, next wedding you go to, and this should just be a standard practice of all weddings,

make a bingo card with your friends of things that are, you could do generic wedding things like, uh, so-and-so is going to catch the bouquet or like like we were just saying, like DJ or band if nobody knows. And then you can do funny ones where like only you and your friends know what each other might do when you go out for a night. For instance, Zach FaceTiming us because we knew he would see us all together on the list.

Was it really? Heck yeah, it was. Dude, you got me one away, but there was a missing piece to mine, so we had no winner this weekend. Is that why you guys were so happy? Not because I called, but because I completed a bingo piece?

Yes. 100%. There we go. I love FaceTiming. I'm a FaceTime savage. You're a FaceTime slut. Zach always FaceTimes me, and I feel super special. I'm like, yo, what's up, man? He's like, yo, what's up?

Christian didn't answer. I make my rounds. I have my order of operations. Tier list of friends for FaceTiming. Yeah, pretty much. Girls at the top makes a little bit more sense god damn it is Tommy E tier?

no no no Tommy's in a tier by himself hey they were bed buddies in Vegas he has to have his own tier pretty high up yeah my missing bingo slot for the weekend was to have someone from our group

kiss somebody and which that was my missing one too could you imagine us double bingo on one damn so we were rooting for people hard all the like groomsmen and bridesmaids were like crushing on each other and then nothing happened tommy didn't talk to a single girl. So, you know. Bad weekend. Jesus. We went up to breakfast the next morning and we all were just looking at the girls like, so, did you? Did you kiss someone?

I know. It was lame. I told Corey I was going to kiss him so we can do double bingo and then I was like, ah, maybe not. Which, do I regret it? Maybe a little bit, yeah. Well, is the bingo continuous?

Sure. Alright. I mean, we're going out in Pittsburgh this weekend. I'm going to wear some chapstick this weekend. Don't look at me like that. Do you like Burt's Bees or Chapstick Brand? What's the garbage flavor that everybody hates?

Cinnamon flavor chapstick? Get out of here with that shit. Ew. Don't they make that? I'm not a chapstick user so i got non-chapped lips 24 7 spanish jeans all right if money wasn't an issue what's one ridiculous thing you would have at your wedding i'm gonna go thing you would have at your wedding? I'm going to go 25 foot tall

ice sculpture of me. Clothed or unclothed? One on either side. One's clothed and everyone on that side has to wear clothes. One's unclothed on the other side where you cannot wear clothes on that half of the wedding. I'm going to have to win a couple lotteries to pay for it

money's not an option so I'm gonna get everybody's sticky hands wow man you really pulled out the big bucks on that one no I was thinking like so originally i was thinking like carnival games and stuff like that because like that would be wild if you could do like a carnival wedding yeah like ferris wheel but like a little like yes monk tank you know all of it the classics yeah you always see him uh i don't know get a

clown get the nitty lion to dance around a little bit so low i love it i'm gonna get it i will so originally i was thinking like because people do like cotton candy machine popcorn things and that's like they do like that theme for their like hors d'oeuvres or hors d'oeuvres, if you will. And they'll do like that stuff. And I think that's really cool. But that's expensive. But it's not like 25 foot ice sculpture of me expensive. Gotta think bigger.

I would if I had unlimited money, I think I would do. I would just go all out for like the entrances when the Brian, the group and the bridesmaids, and I would do it full WWE style, like fireworks, um, that's incredible techniques, jumbotron effects.

You get to pick your song that you walk out to play the song, Brian, play the song. I'd walk out to. Yeah. So, yeah, I mean, that's, I think I'm cute. I know I'm sexy. I've got the look. So yeah, I mean, I would just blow all of my money on that stuff. You wouldn't put that playing as they usher your body down out of your funeral? Yes.

We need to play the game like wedding or funeral. What's better? Don't. I'd like to change my answer. I'm going to take all that money and invest it into a ira no at this point you know hilarious retirement boy hilarious side story though um my friends from high school that are big into wwe they always call me the heartbreak kid and like would play that song constantly

when we would go out so I respect it I respect it so so for this wedding you guys didn't get plus ones did you? we did? I can't remember

I don't know so it got postponed because of covid so like the original invites were like two years ago now so details are hazy yeah i don't think so because then i started dating claire afterwards and like they knew we were all singles hell so they didn't set us up yeah at the time because my move is always because i've got a i've got a wedding coming up in october where i get a plus one and my move would be to say yes i'm bringing someone then i don't bring someone and then i get two meals i can try the chicken double beef but i but but i still cover because you're supposed to your gift supposed to be what you're supposed to like cover the cost of your

dinner plus a little extra right i'd cover the price of both dinners i just want to try both or why don't you just go out to eat don't poke holes get a really long fork bring it to the wedding kind of sneak some bites off another table i will say if and i don't know if this is one of your questions brian but if you don't have an open bar get your wedding out of my face yeah like there have been some weddings i've had to go to where i've had a tailgate in the parking lot and like play slap the bag and sneak in flasks and it's just been it's just been not great and i get interrogated the

parking lot and had the open bar highly recommend well yeah that's because you're uh it's because you're a degenerate it was classy it was classy we like to have fun here a little docking before so we showed up it was me cory tomm Rooks. We get out of the car. Was Dylan there at that point? Yeah, Dylan. That was when we were going to take a picture together. And we all get out of the car and go try to take a dumb photo together. And we're like, all right, let's all just prom pose.

So we all just grab each other's hips. And this is before the reception started at all. So everyone around us should be pretty sober. There's some middle-aged dude up on the hill just yells down to us that's called docking as we're all like like butt to penis and like all squished together we all look up we're like yeah let's not do this anymore and then we had the urban dictionary for a couple of them to show them what it actually meant but to scream docking at a wedding at random people you don't know is an aggressive move. My life has never been the same ever since

I learned what that meant. Oh yeah, Tommy learned this weekend. You gotta throw it into casual conversation now. And then Brian told me to charades it. Like I acted out. Oh yeah, he did. Then I got double traumatized.

We're just here to keep your mental health down, Tommy. That's really what the plan is for us. Keep it down? Yeah, postpone it. Keep them, you know, like, as low as possible. Delay it. Delay it. I'm curious, curious uh based on like plus ones do you think that's a good date idea or like is that just like way too serious it depends on which wedding you're

going like whose wedding you're going to if it's a third cousin wedding bring a date if it's your sister or brother's wedding do not bring it like a first time date because you have to look at those pictures yeah yeah yeah well okay so i feel like valentine's day is like a good opportunity to just kind of send it when it comes to dates like maybe someone like a little bit out of your league because you know it's like valentine's day just like i like weddings like. It could be super romantic. Are you saying this is a wedding on Valentine's Day? Or are you saying just in general, Valentine's Day, you're going to go out all night on No, he's saying the general feeling of the date.

The ambience, if you will. Yes. Which, I mean, i get that i think that's looking at the best case scenario which worst case is you're going to a wedding and the date goes bad at the beginning and it's just like super awkward in a very long date yeah it's a risky move because there's no easy way out for either of you. Unless you drive separate. I think if you can get. Yeah.

Sure. I think if you can get like second or third date, like get one in where it's like, I know I'm not going to be annoyed. Like neither of us is going to be like awkward and annoyed by this. Not a terrible move because at least at least their presence isn't gonna bother you like i don't know like that's the best way i can put it right like i don't know have you guys ever been a plus one of like just a friend like a guy to a wedding i brought a plus one a guy friend to a wedding, fantastic wedding. So much fun.

It was awesome. I've been campaigning to be a plus one. Like that's my platform. I just want to be plus ones to weddings. I like plus one for hire type of thing. I don't know. There's probably been like a, a call run movie made about that,

but I'll be, I'll be just, I wish Paul run made a movie like that. That would be sick. Honestly, for those listening, Zach would be a great plus one to any wedding, even having just met somebody. Guy, girl, anyone.

That'd be fun. That'd be a good plus one. I don't know if you could stand at a fish wedding. Kind of have to breathe under water a bit. True. Yeah, man, woman, animal, anything. uh we're good he prefers animal um zag i'll bring i'll bring you to one there it is there we go i'm open for it but he prefaced that with that's an actual date he was asking because he knew he was going to bring you

yeah tommy just said he's going all out on this so oh funny story yeah funny story like just speaking about sophomore year of college for valentine's day i was like you know what like tommy loves talking about valentine's day oh yeah i think well you know i'm just trying to you know find ideas for future plus ones but zach you seem like a good time so but anyway sophomore year in college I was like you know what like I'm just gonna send it and just like ask the prettiest girl I know to a movie and surprisingly

she said yes and we watched Frozen we watched Frozen and you know cause I thought it would be like cute yeah you know how like at the beginning of the movie um I like I go to put my arm around her

and you know how like the parents like go out sailing the seas and they fucking die that was the exact moment where I tried to make a move and I was like you know and then the whole rest of the movie was just like weird

safe to say didn't go well okay so tip for next time look up the plot ahead of time so you don't try to make a move when the parents are dying although if those parents were dicks to a lot of people it would have been a lit funeral Frozen 3 it's gonna have a sick

funeral scene in it caught it right now. Disney. Yeah, it picks our movies. People always die. It's always sad. If they had a sick funeral for the old lady in Up, it would have been a very different movie.

They need a prequel. Go back to the funeral for that lady. Show how many sticky hands they had. Show how much baby back ribs they funeral for that lady. Show how many sticky hands they had. Show how much baby back ribs they had in the back. The prequel called Down. They just dance the whole time. This might be a hot take, but I don't think the beginning of that movie

is that sad. Yeah, that's a hot take. I agree. It's not going to be sad if like you introduce the character and then like two seconds later they die like it doesn't build it up that much yeah exactly yeah

what Frozen? up pay attention my man no in up I mean like I thought you were gonna say it's like happy cause they like lived well did they live a long life? yeah they got you were going to say it's, like, happy because they, like, lived. Well, did they live a long life?

Yeah, they got old and she died. So it's, like, happy-ish. I think she's. But sad music's playing, so it's sad. I think it's still sad because, like, yeah, she died or whatever. But, like, everyone makes it out to be, like, the saddest cartoon they've ever seen in their life. But it's, like, the first 45 seconds of the movie she dies if she died at the end and she was on the whole trip with them and then like just like fell down a flight of stairs that would be sad we should rewrite it did you hear about the beginning before you watched it because i feel like it was the setup of like oh i'm going to to a funny Pixar movie, and it's like, here's death. Look at it.

And you're like, whoa. They're going to bring you back down to... Honestly, I'm going to be... I'm going to be real with you guys. I just totally lost where you guys... What movie you're talking about. Up.

Okay, that's what I thought. I was like, okay, what Pixar movie does someone die super early okay what other ones do they die super early in man you want to hate frozen uh mine king's not early tarzan okay mine kings it's disney i take a bad thing i hate when i hate when tiktoks start with the up uh theme song, like in the audio, because you know it's just going to be really sad.

Oh, well, yeah, that's a death scene. Of course it's going to be sad. Yo, future idea for Tearless. Can we Tearless Pixar dads based on their hotness? Because Tarzan's dad low-key thick, and he fought off a jaguar, but then he died. What about Pixar moms based on thickness? Isn't that like a dumpers can we do both I just didn't want to discriminate against dads or moms I want an all-inclusive parent parental podcast fix our parents I mean

father's day why don't we leave it up to a twitter poll say dads or moms thickness tier listing and see what all right so it's gonna be me zach and cory and rooks voting on who we want to see yeah but at least we got a nice fair vote i'll vote i will post it after the episode i'll tell you we can do that next week i've got my fingers crossed it's 50 50 and we have to do both let. Let's go. I feel like that's episode Tommy has to be back on because he's going to have strong opinions on how thick people are. No, with Tommy, he needs to grade our episode and write a dissertation on it

and give us grades and who had the best draft. Now it's perfect because when Tommy calls in, everybody knows who he is. Introduce yourself as that, please, next time. I haven't looked at those YouTube comments in a while, but I still have no idea how that video kind of blew up for no reason. What?

Yo, I typed in tarzan's dad into google and the first one that popped up was the gorilla they said it was kerchak first and not his actual human dad so do we have to rank the gorilla or not to rank his actual dad i mean that girl is thick as shit my guy yo his mom's kind of hot too man his dad's got that cool beard where it like goes down from the sideburns and then goes over oh hell yeah bottom facial hair um it's gonna be a horny episode the next time

if we're ranking how hot cartoons are you can't have a horny episode I'd be really uh very upset if you had a horny episode and didn't have to have tommy and kristen on the horny episode because kings and queens of that emotion in our friend group can't yeah we deforce make me force tearless mufasa amongst the amongst the uh the dads

mufasa's got that mane my guy that deep voice too oh put me to sleep daddy isn't that darth vader it is oh wait actually it is i thought you're being an idiot yeah no i'm being a smart person are we sticking to pixar only are we doing like any cartoon because like dexter's lab his mom are you gonna i was just going to i was just going to say that the deck is ridiculous we'll save it for the episode because we're getting close to having to rate it right now. That's a little tease for next week. We're getting all hot. This is when you need to play the Lord Have Mercy. Oh, I'm so sorry.

Lord Have Mercy, I'm about to bust. You got to have that one on deck for that episode. Yeah, that's going to get annoying. It's going to be there a lot. It's going to be great. We'll find some other horny soundbites. The bulb is a sexy thing. My bad. be great we'll find some other uh horny soundbites the bulb is a sexy thing my bad

oh it's fantastic i apologize i love that clip i'm keeping that one forever please don't apologize that was fantastic all right oh well that went off the rails um pixar next week you guys want to start talking some bachelor i know cory does i have not watched this season yet not out of any uh boycotting at all just out of sheer laziness you should should come in middle of the season both of you. Just watch one episode and try to guess what's been going on. Alright.

I know enough about Bachelor-esque TV. Yo, on a side note, Remy's dad from Ratatouille, little rough and tumble. Save it for next week. We can't seem to get off this conversation. He's got that New York accent.

I don't hate it. Yikes. All right. Tommy and Brian take it away with the Bachelor talk. All right, Tommy. How me and Rook started doing it last week is we're going to have three stars and then like a special mention.

Rook's had his three stars be like his three favorite people or moments that week. And then a special mention was the bad guy of the week. But last week I did my three stars being like the three worst people of the week. And then my like one positive was my like one random highlight. So my one highlight of the week is going to be the gaslighter of the week which is going to thomas because this dude sucks she keeps asking katie keeps asking him questions about like they had a group date and they all sat down to try to talk like past relationships and their history and stuff like that and this dude just rambled and it was like yeah i have a lot of red flags and like

no one likes me blah blah blah and didn't say a single thing other than just like negative stuff about himself and so she came up to him afterwards i was like hey you said all these things and that's fine but like tell me about him he's like yeah you know I'm just like really in love with you and fear of love and like blah blah blah and he's just I'm just really into and he like didn't answer a single thing and just talks and talks and talks and he sucks none of the guys in the group in the house like him either and like there's been so far last week, someone went home, sent home from Katie. This week, someone got sent home from Katie

outside the rose ceremony. Next week, he's definitely going home too. You agree? Disagree? Yeah, I... No, I 100% agree with that. And I want to say bad guy of the week is actually bad girl, which is Katie, because in past seasons, in past seasons, the drama people always stay. And I think like the producers definitely have something to do with that. And she's like, nah, like she just kicks people out or doesn't

give them a rose if they cross her boundaries so respect yeah because she was gonna keep carl this week and then that one dude at the rose ceremony was like hey thanks for the rose by the way we all think he's lying and she like left talk to tasha and caitlin was like hey i was gonna keep him and they're like yeah but do whatever you want to do and then came back and she made him leave so like she made a decision on the spot well yeah well do you know how it came down to aaron and carl that was i i was like oh well the producers yeah i was like oh well the producers are gonna keep carl for sure so i was actually pretty blindsided by that like obviously great decision but i thought they were gonna keep carl around for like x i don't think it was just aaron and

him though i think that's like how they edited it but she seemed to be like sort of more into aaron because she like went to him for like advice on like who to keep around like last week you know yeah that's well yeah that's kind of why i was surprised it came down to them but you're probably right this has something to do with editing but the one thing that i i like aaron but the the only thing that comes out of his mouth is like shit talking other people yeah and i'm glad he doesn't i'm glad he doesn't bring it up to katie it's caused more drama but like every time he is like even around katie he just seems perpetually negative and like pissed off like those vibes are not attractive yeah and like i'm sure there's so many other parts of the episode where like they're being more normal that you just don't actually see but yeah everything that's associated with

his storyline is just him like calling people out on their crap so like it gives you a weird weird yeah but i if thomas goes home again next week and there's three people gone three episodes in a row that are causing problems it would be great and that's on katie and i think that's on the producers too i think they're just less ridiculous this year so far because like there's been a ton of drama with the bachelor and like them like not having good seasons that are just focused on drama and stuff so i hope they're turning it around yeah but so my three stars for the week i'm gonna go for the three sad moments for me for the week so my third star goes to john the bartender this dude's so nice and just like

happy looking and got like zero screen time and is just like the nicest person in the world and barely got it past like episode three everyone on reddit is like obsessed with them apparently on the like bachelor subreddit so i was sad he went because there's so many there's a couple other people she gave a rose to that like i've never actually seen their face i was putting together like a list of all the faces today because i need to actually know their names and there's like four guys that i have no clue who they actually are so my third star of the week based on that is david because when he got the rose in the rose ceremony it was the very first time i ever heard of him so like congratulations for getting that screen that's

what i'm saying there's so many people that they've shown nothing of. It's weird. It doesn't help they're all very generic-looking white dudes for the most part. The ones that I actually don't know the face of, at least. David is a proud black man. How do I not know what he looks like? And then as soon as he sees sticks around and Thomas steals time from him in the group. Oh, that's who it was? The poor guy? And then as soon as he C6 around and Thomas steals time from him in the group.

Oh, that's the poor guy. Yeah, I pulled up his face now. I have no idea. Who he is. I'll be pissed about him, too. Thomas is still alive, baby. He's got no screen time or FaceTime with Katie, man. So second star of the week, my second saddest person,

when they had that group date again and they were, like, talking about past relationships and stuff, this dude Hunter, who looks like Sharkboy from Sharkboy and Lava Girl, just looks insane, apparently had a wife and was married before and has kids and ended up getting divorced and everything talk about hunter tommy uh hunter dope sleeve he had he has six sleeves and the the way the producers lined it up episode one is like you thought he was one of the people. Trying to. That was going to go home.

Like night one. Before he got any screen time. And now he's like. One of the main characters. So great bounce back Hunter. And he was the one that called Thomas Allen. All his BS. Lit. I love your thoughts. Love your thoughts on the episodes. lit great great description

love your thoughts on the episode Tommy give your last you still have your second star and first star right yeah second star I'm going to Nick

who made an appearance former Bachelor and led like the peer support group of airing out all your dirty laundry thought that was pretty cool of him um first star

I'm going my man Connor from Nashville who I wonder why he's gonna be your first star he's just well nashville you know but he's he's just the man um he he's not gonna he's not gonna end up being engaged to katie but uh i don't know he's just the dude he he seems almost a little too nice which is weird but like do you kind of have like gonna get katied by katie where she's gonna say yes that's what i was and i don't see that's what i was just that's what i was just gonna say how like uh matt james was like katie's the coolest but i just don't feel it like that's what I was just gonna say how like uh Matt James was like Katie's the coolest but I just

don't feel it like that's probably what's going to happen to Connor from Nashville Smashville baby yeah but y'all need to you don't need to catch up because yeah i actually i'm gonna i'm down to do that uh the like mid-season your thoughts on it but uh yeah i i would probably say like there's in seasons past that i've seen it's like bro can we just fast forward to like the final four because you know like who they're into and who they're not but i can confidently say there's like eight to ten that like legit could run away with it brian i don't know what your thoughts are there's not a lot of the guys she's into a lot of guys so i just think that's her personality though but yeah she seems like she's really into everybody but there's like a easy top like four because connor be the cat dude absolutely there's greg who like also has a dead dad so like easy there and then there from this

episode the one-on-one was with michael who his wife died so like okay they like love each other already there no like she has this sounds like this sounds like the nfl draft when like you have to have a tragic thing in your life happen in order to get paid everyone does yeah amari yeah it's like oh you know jamar chase drafted like his his brother don't crack on the side of the road or something like that like this did this guy also become obsessed with balloons after his wife died? Or what's the story? No, but you like sticky hands a lot. Yo, chill.

Okay. What's the... I'm getting there. I'm getting there. I'm getting there. I guess, yeah, I'm probably exaggerating with the 8 to 10, but I just think they're every even now like everybody she talks to she really vibes with and there's gonna be like there's gonna be some blind

sides a lot earlier on i feel like than normal yeah all the all the dates seem like they're way further into the season than they actually are normally the first like one-on-one dates are like oh that was cool that was cool they kissed once they like kind of connected but these ones are like yeah yeah my dad's dead your dad's dead we're both made for each other okay let's make out so my so when when you were disconnect when you were disconnected i i have a theory that connor is going to get friend-zoned. Friend-zoned? He's going to get katied.

Wait, why? Katied by Katie. I just think he really likes him as a person, but is just not very into him romantically. I like the theory the only part that i agree with is that he sucks at kissing he's like he slams his head into her whenever they kiss and you can tell that she's like not into it yeah and there's one interview where like the first kiss they had in the first episode she's like yeah it wasn't good so So from that one little clip. Well, he was also wearing whiskers. But she was into the whiskers. She was into the cat outfits.

We'll see. I can kind of see that. I told Rooks last week that I think. Go ahead with your stars. Okay. My second star before got cut off by Skype being dumb was for Hunter because in the group date, he talks about how he was married before and had two kids and then like was just a dick to all of them and then his marriage like came crumbling down and like i

don't know if he has like um he's like custody of his kids anymore anything like that and he was bawling his eyes out at the like group date so that was really sad so he just so i kind of got the vibes that he was like he could have been a dick but he was like a workaholic oh that's absolutely what he said but like if you're just being a workaholic too it's kind of a dick move to like your family so i know there's kind of the excuse of you just like kind of focused on work but still yeah yeah it's like he had his priorities wrong yeah but dude looks like shark boy from shark boy and lava girl um just looks completely insane don't give me that face spiky hair have you seen taylor lautner in that movie yeah no i i just haven't seen this guy i know the look you're going with on that description.

It's like any look of any kid who was in a movie around that time, though. And that's what this guy looks like. Spot on. Not Harry Potter. Not The Rock. Was The Rock ever a child? The Rock was born. He was like 6'4". I've never seen a photo of The Rock as a baby, so maybe not.

New conspiracy. He's never been a baby. He was built as an adult. So my last, my one star for the week goes to Michael. I feel like that's just a given. The dude had a wife who died to breast cancer and had to like give a speech to katie about it and man that dude can speak he was eloquent as hell and like made her cry like it like multiple multiple times and like had some really good quotes that were trending like all

over twitter of like what a gift it is to be able to fall in love twice. Just like everybody fell in love with that dude immediately. My thing. Dude, it's been three weeks. Get the fuck out of here. It's even been less than three weeks. It's probably been five days. Oh, yeah. It's probably been like a week and a half.

But yo, she's so into him too. But I don't think she's going to actually end up with him. She just doesn't seem like the type to like deal with having kids at the moment she seems like young and like wants to like live life and not like settle down that much so even though she's really into it she's like he's like in love with her too already so i'm gonna feel bad when he gets sent home but i don't think he's i think it'll last a while but i think he's out by like final like five yo Katie how many waves

of children can you withstand I'll tweet at her she's like super active on twitter I can get her attention well we got it we can get her on the podcast next week if we cloned Michael's kid

how many ways you can't ask her like hey that dude you're in love with yeah his child how many times can you kill his child just ignore all emotion what if she came on unlimited take her vibrator just stab him in the eye that's her one weapon she gets for the fight though that's assault brother all right who is the guy i always forget um like people's intros because it was so long ago but who was the guy that brought the blow-up doll that person's still on the show i have no clue actually i'm gonna take a wild guess and just say like zero percent chance he's still on the show

doesn't sound that wild of a guess honestly i'm going probably because i don't know i just have a feeling okay so the guy who brought the blow-up doll was Cody, who got sent home two weeks ago. Oh, you're right. He's a zipper salesman, and it was just being sus as hell with someone else knowing him from back home and saying he wasn't there for the right reasons. But anyways, Tommy, what's your one star for the week? Oh, shit.

I already gave my one star, and I don't remember who i said sick never mind i'll edit that out so just you're gonna have you're gonna have to listen okay oh brian's gone again or am i gone again oh no you're fine oh i'm here i'm here technical difficulties this week not great not great not great testicle difficulties all right yeah everyone's gonna be listening to my audio and i'm gonna progressively getting louder when uh when tommy calls in uh next to rank our podcasts and give us thoughts where can he call in brian in the description of every episode there's a link uh in that link you can send us a voice message uh insult us to have something to rank make fun of tommy just yell into the mic whatever you want we'll put it into the episode

thank you for listening rate us five stars next week apparently we're already in the thickness of pixar dads and moms look up for the twitter poll spay and neuter your dogs see you plays out