It’s Wednesday My Dudes - Ep. 5: Don't Let a Great Dane Lick Your Balls w/ Special Guest: Zaddy

Episode Date: February 17, 2021

Everyone's least favorite Zak makes an appearance this week to celebrate Valentines day by ranting about his hinge Bugaboos. We answer a listeners question about how to get his neighbor to help him hook up with a friend. And we talk over Week 8 of the Bachelor as hometowns are next and contestants are dropping like flies. Timestamps: 0:00:00 - 1:11:00 - Bachelor Week 7 1:11:00 - 1:51:00 - Zaddy's Hinge Buggaboos Follow us on Twitter @IWMD_Pod

It is Wednesday, my dudes. Welcome back to another episode of It's Wednesday, my dudes. First off, I would like to apologize. We had a lot of talk last week about this Creed performing at the Super Bowl, and I'm an idiot. I messed up. I'm acknowledging it now to start the podcast. It was at Thanksgiving.

It wasn't at the Super Bowl. They played at Thanksgiving. Should have at the Super Bowl. They played at Thanksgiving. Should have been the Super Bowl. Apologies. Definitely should have been, but that's my bad. I take full responsibility. But we got very special episode today.

We got love in the air, people. This is your Valentine's Day episode. We got a very, very special guest flying out from Chicago to to the studio first class we got zach kushner aka zaddy aka your mama's favorite good boy aka the midwestern milkman all self proclaimed by zach zach welcome to the show what's up up, boys? Chi-town bust down. We got Zach here. We got the usual suspects.

We got Bryguy. I'm here. Cody Hubley. What up? And C. Myers. Pre-Zan. C. Myers. We got a ton to get into today.

I'm going to let us dive into it. Deep breaths first. We got a roller coaster of an episode to get through here there were ups there was downs i don't even i don't know where to start well let's start bachelor week seven bachelor week seven we kicking off heather walks in just gets obliterated there's no bullying now there's no no more bull no zero bullying this is a zero bullying television show they are anti-bully but she comes in and gets bullied by eight girls immediately coming in she she doesn't say a word she just comes over to the

girls and is like i'm so sorry like i know like this must be weird who are you why the fuck are you here like off rip she's just standing up there too and they're all like interviewing her and just like one by one asking her questions it just seems so it was a terrible interview panel and the one quote from jessinia that cracked me up she was she said so you didn't win the last one, so this is why you're here now. It's like, there's probably other reasons. I'm not here to make this a pro MJ podcast, even though, you know, shout out to my girl MJ. But I've got a little sense of satisfaction from her, from Justenia just being a total bully. When she looked flashing back and she was like, yeah, like, you're just like a bully. Like, I don't know what you're talking about.

And then she's just like grilling, you know, the new girl coming in. It was it was mildly satisfying for me. We got one week. Yesenia is the leader of the anti-bullying task force leading the charge, making America better. And then the next week she comes out in off rip for no reason just starts bullying heather and just being a terrible person before we continue though i just want to ask zaddy how many dms have you sent mj in the last week uh plus or i'll put the over under a plus or minus nine and a half and i'd probably pound the over if i were you guys i'll definitely put pound the over. I'll put my mortgage on it. I may have, oh, I'll get into it later.

Someone who may have left, I may have looked at their social media and debated messaging them. Cause like, you know, why not? Scared money don't make money, baby. Exactly. I do want to go back one quick thing to, shout out to that couch that they were all sitting on.

That couch was the smallest couch for 11 people I've ever seen in my life like the bachelor being a big budget show they're like we're not going to put it in the furniture budget they definitely had like eight more couches too when there was more girls there and they just didn't use them for some reason they should get rid of them as more girls leave it's really just a game of musical chairs when somebody leaves they remove one more chair from the house i mean didn't they do the last season out of lakinta like what do you expect fair hey this is they're trying to they're trying to make trying to this is for social distancing man okay relax um but yeah so we go we go jessenia's being an a-hole piper man piper i don't i've never seen a quicker turn of events piper last episode

i was very pleased with i gave her tons of praise on her date i thought she was cool this episode she's being an a-hole she has a rose she literally has a rose has a rose had a one-on-one is sitting there talking to him and like is in the driver's seat like it seems like she's doing well and then heather comes in and it's just she's just being as mean as humanly possible that like one person can be to another person it was insanity it was the quickest turn of character she showed her true colors and man karma is a fickle bitch but we'll get into that later but yeah uh heather's 15 minutes of fame was uh pretty quick-lived she came in like talked to him went and cried in front of the girls went back to talk to him and he's like

yeah i don't i don't think it's going to work. He gave her the whole but comment that he's given to every girl. He whipped that out three times. Every time. I know. It's great. So they did confirm, though, that they had never met in person. The only reason they knew each other was through Hannah Brown knowing of each other. But my favorite thing that she

said was that how hard of a type of guy Matt is to find. I was like, obviously she hasn't met any of us there's five of us sitting right here well maybe maybe four i'll let you decide which one's not but i like to think we're all better than that yeah i was like i would like to not compare myself to matt i want to give a shout out to rooks though not five minutes after katie is gone all the kindergartners of the house are just bullying the crap out of everybody like that's that's the reason there was no level like level setting nobody who has like any

knowledge to be like oh you know what maybe we shouldn't just like talk some shit and it it was just awful to watch fantastic but awful like a car wreck they're like the sith when one dies another one arises and takes their place. There always has to be one. I felt bad for Heather, though. I hope she secured the bag on this because they made her look awful. The producer's like, hey, listen, BTWs, you're going to come in. You're going to cry a little bit. We're going to pretend that Matt cares about you.

And then we're just going to send you home in a span of about maybe one night and 15 actual show minutes. So I hope she at least secured the bag because while she was corny and shouldn't have been there, it was a tough watch. Yeah, I feel so bad for her. They bring her on, throw her ass in a minivan, bring her up to the show. She has to film a two-week vlog series

of her like spinning pizza on her head and looking like an a-hole shows up to the house. Can't open the door. Gets bullied. Matt is just like, yeah, like I like you and like that's cool. But like I've been here for seven weeks. So get out of my house. And then she just gets she gets back in the car.

That's it. Welcome to the frickin show, baby. I will stay with matt this episode i like this is this is gonna be a long episode of the podcast i feel like because i'm not that upset with some of the things that matt did on this episode one of them being the first one on this is sending heather home like yeah i did i think there was a low percentage chance that she was gonna stay, but I'm glad that he's, you know, he's up there knocking down the easy shots. Like,

you gotta do that to keep on going and have some respect in the game. So, good for him. I like, I'll just say that off the bat. That's one point, one point, Matt. He set her home, though, with one of the most cliche lines of all time with, maybe a different lifetime do you know how much i hate that line see you in another life brother have you been burned by that cody i have terrible terrible line and very very valentine's day like rom-com movie-esque for when the main character gets denied by somebody and this is what leads them to like find their self like that's what that line was and it was brutal. I know we talk about as a frequent listener of every episode of this podcast.

I know we comment on the wardrobe of the ladies a lot. I thought Heather's dress big fire. See, it was fire. But also the one thing I'll say, first of all, OK, if you're going to come in for 15 minutes, you're right. Like, yeah, come in guns a blazing because you got to make your stamp but you know i think it wasn't this past episode it was the episode before they were like you know she did the montage of her like getting into her outfit or whatever putting her shoes on whatever it was and i was like is she getting into a wedding

dress like i legitimately thought that she was going to show up and, like, propose. Because at that point, I didn't know if she'd met this guy. So I was like, oh, did they, like, hang out? And, like, is this going to be a whole big thing, like, that they just randomly throw in to confuse everybody? Because it looked like a wedding dress at first. I do agree, Zach, fire. But initial thoughts, I was like, hold on, what's happening here? I thought the dress was fire until she's getting in the minivan with it.

You're getting in a minivan wearing a dress like that? You're just confusing the general public. Like, no one knows what to think while looking at you. Well, obviously, her, you know, Instagram fame hasn't taken off that much. She couldn't afford the high-end rental. She had to go minivan. That's why she's on the show. She's trying to get that come out i'm pretty i i think someone i was watching with last night said she she could choose like any car and they jokingly said something about a minivan and

she was like oh sure yeah i'll do it but she didn't know that like they were gonna film her driving up to the mansion and stuff so when they they told her that part, she was like, oh, F. But like, who knows? Do you think it was Hertz or Enterprise? Anyone? Enterprise. Yeah, for sure. Dollar rentals.

I have one more thought on the Heather thing too. I hate that Heather didn't tell Matt that these girls are the worst. She was there for 15 minutes. I have another point on that too. 15 minutes and girls are just throwing passive aggressiveness at her. Like it's dodgeball. They're Billy Madison.

She is all the third graders in like dodgeball at recess. Like she's just getting pelted and she didn't say one word to him and he comes back to all of them and he's like you guys just i gotta commend you you did such a great job with all of this and it's he's the theme of this episode and i was talking about this with people i was watching with matt james is a little puppy dog that has no idea what's happening he's just smiling happy to be there at all times but has no clue what he's a part of see but i think if he brings up all of those issues i mean we saw what happened to katie she's the one who brought up all the issues maybe he thinks of her as like not the one just because

of that for some reason in his head like it doesn't it's like it didn't work out in the past why would it work out now and she hasn't seen the season she doesn't know what's going on prior i'm not saying i'm not saying bring it up to him after it happens i'm saying once she's already on her way out going home why not if you do let's say you do and i don't know if heather actually does but she was acting like she really cared about him a lot even though they had never met or she wanted to care about him i don't know um but wouldn't you want to let him know like oh hey by the way you have only a handful of people here left they're all pretty shitty just heads up i do feel like they already played that card though

from like a producer's standpoint they're not gonna like rehash the same the same exact thing like it would have been the same exact scenario because in matt's mind he's thinking veronica veronica's gone that dingus mj she's out and like they were the issues or whoever he thought was the issue they're like we're two weeks after that or a week after that he thinks that it's gone She's out. And like, they were the issues or whoever he thought was the issue there. Like we're two weeks after that or a week after that. He thinks that it's gone. Victoria, not Veronica.

I was good. I was good. Yeah. Whatever. I already forgot her name. She's gone. She's out of my memory. But the thing is now you,

now you don't bring it up. Like nobody talks about it and you have like, I think out of all of them them there's two of them that i don't think are assholes the rest of them i think are assholes and if it's a from a production standpoint if you go if you're on twitter last night everyone hates this group of girls yeah everybody hates this group of girls it's not one side or the other everyone hates this group of girls and it makes everything way less interesting as we come down to the wire where we're actually supposed to care about these like

characters we're being presented i feel like too like people don't talk a lot about the rewatch like the like the bachelor like matt james rewatching this with either his inevitable future fiance or whatever and he's probably just like oh that's what you did too when heather came in and i feel like you just got to have some natural like second guessing because you can't be happy about it or what about like these girls parents or like siblings um it's just like a weird i feel like you people don't think about that a lot until like they are truly bad and they're like i i know how like my parents react they'd be like zach what the what are you doing here to be fair to well on that point of people people just bullying the crap out of

everyone I like we said it yesterday by default uh kit was climbing up the ladder because she's just sitting there she didn't do crap which was the first time I was like well good for you for keeping your mouth shut because I mean yeah we realized later in the episode there's a whole lot of other things to talk about it but I just I do want to say, you know, she was one of the only ones. Except for when Kit said, bitch, what are you doing? It was an honest question. Honest question. Yes.

Kit wasn't jumping the whole time, but Kit probably had the most like effed up one out of everybody where she just said, bitch, like, what are you doing? Like, lost spot on. Oh, yeah, that is true. That's spot on. Well, going back to Zach's rewatchability part, this made me lose, like, so last week I picked Piper as, like, the one who was going to win. Obviously, we find out what's going to happen in the end of the season. Corey? Piper! end of the season cory plug it up uh but like within like the first 15 minutes this episode

i no longer wanted piper to be my pick solely because of how she reacted and like if that were to if they were to get engaged in the future which obviously we'll see what happens in the rest of the episode the rewatch ability on that's just going to ruin that as well, potentially. Do we know rewatchability is a word? It is now. Okay. Irregardless. That's enough on Heather, though.

That was the first two minutes of the show. After she immediately got kicked out, he continued his conversation with Piper because she was freaking out about it. So he called her back, like, let let's continue talking and then right from there they went to that first rose ceremony and so there's two rose ceremonies in this episode which is rare but my comment on the not the right

that is geeks it was geeks it is geeks it's not geeks not the right use of the word but Kit got like the It was geeks. It is geeks. It's not geeks. Am I right? Not the right use of the word, man. But Kit got like the first rose on that rose ceremony. That pissed me off. I don't like her.

I don't care what Corey's saying. She's just stupid. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I'm just saying I was giving her some points. I might have looked away, I guess, at the bitch what you do in here comment. So yeah, that sways a little bit. We will dive a new Kit hard later. I have a lot to say about oh yeah terrible phrasing on my part but we will talk about kit a lot later because i have a lot to say but so kick out the first rose i think there's only two roses on this one abigail got the last rose and and then Chelsea and Serena C. Serena,

see you later. Hey, Serena C, I hope you had a great time on the show, and I hope your Instagram does not take off. You're a bad person. She's a flight attendant, right? I hope all your flights get delayed and you have unruly passengers. The exits are here, here, and here, if you please.

How is she a flight attendant? She is such a... Most flight attendants are very nice. They're there to make you feel comfortable. If Serena C was my flight attendant, I would get off the flight immediately. I'd pull the emergency door and just kill everyone on the plane.

She was the one beating the crap out of passengers on all those events. Flight attendants are nice to your face, but are always going to go in the back and then talk trash about all the passengers serena c wasn't nice to anyone to her face that's fair i will say i was flying home from buffalo one course is after we did that hockey trip and i was on a flight of solely flight attendants and their families and then like a few random people worst flight of my life most rude people it's like 6 a.m i could not sleep at all because these people are like dancing in the aisles they knew the actual flight attendants flight attendants suck my opinion that's the first time i've ever

heard of a bulk flight attendant flight yep that's a really that's i wish you videotaped buffalo to baltimore 2018 i'm so lost we just lost You just lost all your future sponsorship from airlines from our recent conversation. It was Spirit. It doesn't matter. Great point. Spirit, if you're listening, we don't want you. So Chelsea also left this episode. But some of Chelsea's quotes right before she left had me dying.

There was one where before she's like, there's no more drama in the house. Like, yeah, that's impossible. We know there's going to be more drama down the line. She's not going to be there to see it, though. That's unfortunate. So maybe that's what she was talking about. But then she said, I find it attractive that he didn't keep another girl. What quote is that?

She's all the other girls agreed with him though. All the girls were so, they were just happy that someone else wasn't coming onto the show. That's all it was. It was so hot that I'm still here and someone else had to leave. It's so hot that he's going to only make out with these eight girls instead of nine. Exactly. But yeah, I didn't like chelsea very much chelsea she was never the one leading the charge but she always had super passive aggressive things to say like when the new girls came

after all the like beef was squashed quote-unquote squashed um she asked one of the new girls like oh do you think bullying is actually the term that it should be like you guys should be using that's that's a big statement it's like you guys have all been assholes absolutely that's what it should be but then she said something she said something else this episode to heather that rubbed me the wrong way but it was really hard to like zone in on hers because eight other girls were being significantly meaner yeah i mean they went the entire like i mean was chelsea one of the new girls she's been there the whole season right she's been the whole time yeah whole time yeah she was okay with them calling one girl an escort but it gets upset that they're calling another girl a bully where's the line here

nothing but facts so that after that rose ceremony though was the first one-on-one of the week which was serena p we're doing their super awkward tantric yoga stuff which pain immediately as soon as it started

i was like all right she's going home like the awkward date never ends well and it's kind of proved wrong before that when she got the final date card and she was talking with like the group, she's like, well, we all expected Abigail and just said you to get this one. But I guess I got it. So I'm gonna get ready for my date. I guess I was like, yo, that's some passive aggressive stuff right there. They all suck.

Like they there's so many things that normally are said, like on the interview side of it or like like to someone else like in a different room that they all just stay in front of each other like they have no filter in front of each other to like be nice at all the the hot word of this episode is going to be passive-aggressive because every single girl here has been insanely passive-aggressive to each other and now it's just one big blob of it and it's just uncomfortable almost at all times it's not very passive it's more just aggressive aggressive that's fair that's the best type of aggressive yeah but this yeah this date so she got this she got a second one-on-one which i immediately thought she was going home because we're down to hometowns i assumed it was going to be oh he's seeing if like like this is make or break yeah and judging on how the date went i 100 thought it was break because she looked insanely uncomfortable the entire time which is fine i don't i don't care if like if she's not into

doing tantric yoga that's fine i don't i do not have issue with that. My issue comes after when every other word is her saying that she hated the date, pretty much. Every other sentence, they're giving their final toast on their whole day. And she's just like, yeah, I know I'm not the best at tantric yoga, and I'll probably never do it again. And today was the worst day of my life. But it's just, especially if Matt's enjoying the date, you just being down and having such a bad time, I think says something about you. Does that make sense?

Yeah, try to enjoy it a little. You can say it wasn't your favorite. And at the end of the day, you got a one-on-one. You got time. Yeah. I think, I don't so i i get that point it was horrible to watch like it was i did not like that terrible just like such great selection on the uh going for the kiss the mat going in for the kiss getting denied happens twice they're doing all these positions it's awkward as hell but i actually i actually understand like why he would keep her because i think that their

conversation after the date is what like that's 100 the reason he went into it saying i know her like on a friendly level we've broken that barrier i want to you know get on to like the relationship side so he tries to like jump into the deep end by doing like sex position yoga which like one yikes uh but then i think like you know her telling him this isn't my thing like she has to let him know like off the bat like look i'm uncomfortable like future, whatever. I don't think he's like, what's it called? Tantric yoga. I don't think he's like doing that 24 seven every single day. I think it was something that he was, I don't know that. I think it was just something he was trying to like test out because he thought it'd be

really fun. And I think they're like watching their conversation afterwards. I was like, they're like understanding each other. They're coming from two completely different sides, they're like understanding each other. They're coming from two completely different sides and they're like getting through this really like awkward kind of a scenario. And I think they did it really well. And I think they both enjoyed like having that conversation and realizing in a relationship, you're not always going to agree. And I think that was a huge plus, which is why I don't disagree with him keeping her. Like I could see her going home,

but I don't hate it that she's still there. No, I agree. I think first off, any date that involves any sort of stretching or showing off my flexibility is immediately terrifying. Like put that as like number one tier of bad date ideas. And I agree. I kind of agree with the, like you mentioned, like the awkward kiss thing that

didn't happen i i guess it was i was just like weird that it didn't happen but then they like kiss all the time at the end of the like at dinner and like when they're ice skating and stuff like that and i get like you don't have to kiss them during the date it's just i guess it makes you want to display like oh i'm kissing you therefore it shows that i'm having a great time type of thing like at once you are doing like tantric yoga so like you know I don't know if it's like a play along thing but that was like that was when I was convinced like oh this is not going good like but then to Corey's point I think it proved like the fact that she was like hey champ listen that wasn't fun actually like turned him on a little

bit and he was like okay cool like I'm gonna keep you around I kind of wish that she got the opportunity to go on a one-on-one date like katie's last week where it was like a complete joke around type deal because this was so boring and maybe it's because boring attracts boring but like it would have been fun to see like if she does have that other like joking around have fun side because i really haven't like seen that from her and yeah i mean i like i said last week i thought that was a waste of a date with katie because he knew he was going to get rid of her. Obviously going into this date with how like awkward it went,

he knew going in that she was already on the list to stay. Yeah. And I like, I, I do. I agree that obviously it's important. There's compromise. It's important to meet each other like halfway and know each other's limits yes 100 agree with that my only issue with her is that she said she hated the date every other sentence that she talked to i it's totally fine to say you hated the date especially immediately after it when you guys are just like decompressing and like just talking about like everything that happened when you're at

dinner later that night and you keep bringing up tantric yoga and how bad of a time you have that's when i like i'm gonna not like you and not enjoy your company because at the end of the day you are like even if you are doing this thing that makes you uncomfortable you are having one-on-one time the week before hometowns and that means a ton that means so much in the in the idea of the show yeah i think i think that's the biggest point i don't disagree with that like she the week before you're gonna go meet this girl's family and it was like it seemed like maybe like the worst i guess we'll say 50 of the date was the worst date she's ever been on so that's like a tough rebound so i understand that i i don't know i just think yeah i i don't i think i would have probably sent her home too but at least i can like

i can understand i can wrap my head around why she's still there whether or not i'm gonna agree or disagree with it like yeah like i guess i can i can understand it like the whole katie thing i don't understand that there's so many that i disagree with where he like sends them home that i'm like mj sure good riddance to mj she should not be here anymore but so yoga date super awkward super weird i thought she was going home the whole time i was wrong she stayed she got the rose so serena p makes it to the next rose ceremony in this episode there's still another one coming and then so after the first one-on-one for the week it was the group date for the week which when they're reading off the names it was still abigail and jessenia were the two that hadn't

had a one-on-one yet so they're like okay we think one of them's gonna get a one-on-one so they're reading off the names it's michelle kit rachel brie and then abigail ends up being on it so that ends up being like the big drama for the group date is why the hell did he not give abigail a 101 it makes no sense um yeah this this group date was it was a little funky i hit every time he has a conversation with rachel it's the same thing they sat down he said what do you think your parents are going to approve of me she was like yeah they would love to see me happy and then they made out that's that is all the conversation was that's all the conversation has been with this girl the entire show it's 110

percent lust there's there's nothing else to it it's lust they want a bone but we move do you guys have anything to say about rachel's one-on-one time i mean there's really nothing there so now i am thrilled for the hometown i can't i know it's like not gonna be in her hometown because at the quarantine and bubble but just like just seeing the previews i know i'm jumping ahead but it's gonna be electric it looked like a preview for get out it was great what are you gonna say uh i just want to say i called that rachel is gonna make it really far in this like three weeks ago and uh it's still true so put it should put some money on it brian just for you i'm gonna

pick rachel to win this thing and she'll be gone next week dude i we'll get to our picks later but big time facts if cody picks them they're gone see ya um but then so the big the big thing that happened at the date well i guess the two the two biggest conversations i feel like were kit and abigail yeah and abigail's pretty big abigail's conversation was i was not expecting it um oh and breeze as well i'm sorry yeah um but abigail's let's talk about that. What are your guys' thoughts? I was so taken back by it. I don't know.

It was just a wild spin zone by Matt that he was trying to play out in his own head. He's like, wow, okay. Like I have had zero time with this girl, but I gave her the first impression rose. So I have to try to spin this in a way to not hurt her feelings, but also try to not make

myself look like an asshole and he didn't neither of those he was like his logic was i you did too good of a job in the beginning which is why i gave you the first impression rose and i was so comfortable with our relationship and then i just kind of forgot about you and so like my other relationships grew because i had one-on-one time with everybody else. So sorry, but you want me to walk you to the car now? And it was just like, what are we talking? Like, dude,

like at least, and I don't know if it's a producer thing, like who chooses to give the one-on-one row like dates or if he needs to push it and be like, Hey, listen, I want to spend time with Abigail. But I feel like if you,

if he would have asked to be like, Hey, I need to spend time with Abigail. The producer would be like, yeah, that's fine. Like, like we can make that happen. And he just didn't do it and so just send her home it was like a

two-second thing and i i felt legitimately bad for her because she was like one of the good ones left yeah i was fully rooting for her over anyone else and for who they get to pick on the dates i've read that they sometimes don't get to pick but if they like make a big fuss about it they can get whatever they want like they're the star of the show they can do whatever the hell they want to do and they'll eventually follow it but yeah like you gave her the first impression rose things were good you're like all about her and then just never gave her a one-on-one gave uh serena two one-on-ones like it makes absolutely no sense at least like let her down on a one-on-one take her to the side and not give her another group date right before the rose ceremony where

you know you're gonna send her home i would think at this point in the season with like hometowns coming up next week he would have more say into who he's getting to pick yeah exactly but uh i just this man does not care about rose ceremonies anymore. He's just getting rid of people left and right. It doesn't matter what time of day, what time of night. He's like, see ya. Every time. I thought after he sent her home and came back, he was like super dramatic. And I thought he was just going to start bringing girls in and be like, see ya, see ya.

Like. Next. Yeah. Shout out to Next. Remember that show on MTV? What a show. need to bring that back we'll have an episode where we go into there's there's all these next episodes on youtube that just the comment section is the greatest thing we'll go through them live react live

reaction so good but so when after he talked to abigail though he came back he's like hey rachel can we talk and i was like shoot like that sounded serious and then they go and just like make out it's like i i can't read him at all and then so let's and then so abigail happens she goes home just completely out of left field i completely agree with zach too like oh i was just working on the other relationships and i forgot sorry like insanity but so then he talked then he talks to brie breeze first off i would just like to say brie you're absolutely insane because this guy is from what i've seen there's not much to him i wouldn't leave my job for him dope six-pack totally agree there dope six-pack really long limbs can probably reach things in high places brie is like 4 11 so super important but i don't know how tall she actually is she's just tiny but

her saying she quit her job was kind of insanity i i think brie like saw like the right on the wall was like all right this guy really likes rachel um i need to do something dramatic to almost force his hand to keep me and was like hey bt dubs i quit my job and he's like oh okay you can you can stay type of thing like he like he just wanted to i think he just wanted to make sure she stayed for at least a couple more weeks to try to, I don't know if it was like build the cloud thing. I mean, she's got no job now,

so like she needs something to do. So I felt like it was, she was just trying to like throw everything at the wall to make sure like she stayed. I feel like there's just like, it's a good move to stay one more week. It's a horrendous move to try to win the whole thing. No,

yeah. 100%. Like the amount of pressure you're putting on this guy right now. It's like, a good move to stay one more week it's a horrendous move to try to win the whole thing no yeah 100% like the amount of pressure you're putting on this guy right now it's like so when you pick me like I'm jobless and I don't know what I'm gonna do but like I'm with you like it's so it's it's awful like I don't understand that guy just he just kept her because he's like well I'm gonna look like the worst person in this on this planet that you just left your job and have no idea what you're going to do when you get home in quarantine. Good luck on all those Zoom interviews because you're not coming home. There's two sides to this, and I want to believe one side because I like Brie.

I think she's been one of the more genuine people here. Anytime other girls are chirping, Brie kind of stays on the fence and doesn't really like dive into it too hard. Either she is super in love with this guy. And this is, this is a big play move of just, I know that this is it.

And this is the connection, which I hope that's, that's what i'm hoping it is or like you said look at it or like you said this is hey i'm homeless and i have to stay here now please please pick me don't think she's homeless but come on it's not homeless but she's it's houseless it's jobless jobless but i want to believe that she's genuine and this is she really truly is like this is my connection this is my person i like i'm not i'm gonna sacrifice everything for this valentine's day man come on you know got some love in the air but i in in the context of this show it looks really really like the other way where you will pull out all the stops to stay in and i think we see this a little in kids but matt has multiple other girls not saying this to him he has multiple other girls not having this like thing over his head. And while this is like,

this is a big deal for her and he needs to take it into consideration. He has a lot less issues and things looming over his head when it comes to the other girls. And it's really, it's shitty to say, and it sounds really bad, but in reality, you have to remember that he has multiple other girls here that aren't give, aren't having

this insanity loom out of baggage with them yeah i feel like for a lot of the women here though i mean not even only this season it could be bachelor bachelorette but i feel like a lot of contestants have to like quit their jobs or like leave and not know what they're going to come back to so i don't know if that was necessarily like a huge thing to bring up because i feel like that's not as uncommon as you might think but i also think brie's just kind of like floating around as the middle ground hey i'm not as terrible as all these other women you've already gotten rid of so she's just kind of floating by i don't know i haven't season. I haven't really noticed her as much.

Like it took me until like a couple of weeks ago to even know which one Brie was. So I don't know. I mean, they focused on the drama over like the good side of things. And that's usually how it works until the last couple of weeks anyways. So I've just I've been I've enjoyed Br as in the first like one on one night one. She laid out so much on the table and really is like diving into this, which I respect because in this process you have to do this or this journey. You have to do this process. And then with a lot of a lot of shit talking, she's been more or less on the sidelines.

Wait, on that note to the process the journey i i noticed yeah exactly trust the process trust the journey especially uh we should be keeping track of commonly said phrases and create a drinking game out of it because i noticed there was a headspace set a lot in this episode all the girls i think at least three girls were saying i just i just want to know matt's headspace right now on this tough tough journey and it was it was too much there are thousands of bachelor drinking games online if you just search bachelor drinking game but not ours so so many we we will we should come up with our own. I do like that as an idea. Also, to Cody's point about the vacation,

I do like that point. I feel like she's not the first girl to quit her job. But also, some of these women, their job is, what was it? Never been kissed before? Was that Heather's? Tough job, tough job. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Do you think she got 10 weeks vacation from that one? She got promoted. That or vacation time though that's pto administrative time off i feel like that though like makes it even more of a desperate move because like matt obviously knows this that these girls are taking time off of their real lives and she's like by the way like my job was my dream job and i quit that for you. So like, can I stay? And so I think it was a little more like,

it was like a forced almost. Do we know what her job actually is? Like, does anybody, I never remember. I have idols actually. She's a communications manager. Dream.

Dream job. I don't, I don't know what that means. Uh, what's Matt's job though? He was a college football player, right? But TikToker,

he's a, I think he's a real estate agent now in New york yeah i think he's he slings apartments slings real estate so real estate doesn't have to work tyler c groupie be part of that but so then that conversation happens now we go to kit's conversation kit's camera kit's conversation was one of the most frustrating things i've ever listened to kit is 21 she said a lot and there's parts i agree with her not wanting kids not wanting to get married right away get that totally makes sense totally understandable the part that i hated was when she said oh well first off she she came on to a show where they get engaged at the end not ready for an engagement yeah when there's seven other girls there that are ready for an engagement apparently and then she says oh yeah like i hope you know like these are my non-negotiables

when we get out of here i'm gonna need time to finish school and then i'm gonna need time to travel and then i need to figure out who i am and i need someone to be my cheerleader and cheer me on and all this she said cheerleader for those things that is absolute insanity that is that is a crazy thing to require of somebody that you're like oh but also like we're not going to be married and stuff like i just think it's that especially in the context of this show is insanity for a 21 year old like to say that is insanity when you're 21 and your parents are millionaires i feel like i'm not shocked by the comments from her though because she also was like i want to travel it's like okay so you figuring out your career means i want to figure out how my mom's gonna give me a job and travel

means i'm just gonna go like party in abiza yeah but complete insanity though that like these her biggest non-negotiables in her life is like yeah you better let me finish school and then you better let me go traveling like when were these not on the table all bachelors do anyway after they win is travel for like four months also i feel like the way she said it too was like matt you're not gonna do any of this with me just so you know like i'm gonna do all this by myself like you're gonna be my like like side thing when I come back. Like, the way she said, I know she probably didn't mean it like that, but the way she said it, like, was hilarious. And then I did find out, too, I don't know if you guys knew this, but, like, Kit, like, her mom or whatever, like, everyone's like, she's like a big fashion designer. She just, like, has clothes and, like, TJ Maxx and Marshalls.

And I'm not here to hate on TJ Maxx and Marshalls, but she's not, like, exactly, like, walking down, runway like doing all these stuff like she's just you know she's getting like the discount you know rack next to the ralph lauren polos i feel like for uh matt to accept all of this like right off the bat he didn't even question any of it he's like yeah okay i feel like he was he's like he was really into her every girl he's really into one that's the he definitely liked her it's i just it's the same thing that i said with brie he has seven other girls there that aren't like oh by the way i need this from you and this from you and this and i need you to be my cheerleader yeah you're not coming with me on the trips but i need you to tell me i'm doing a great job on my trip the whole time okay like it's it's crazy i feel like though for her to be 21

and to bring up these things and not wait until their potential like potentially like the final two or whatever i feel like that's like fairly mature for a 21 year old though i mean she did only say she wanted to wait till she was 25 that's not that long and yeah i don't know and for her like later on to leave the episode because she had all these thoughts in her head i feel like that shows some kind of maturity no we'll get into that in a second oh yeah i know i i don't understand why she was saying this is a long-term decision to like invest the time into her because she didn't want kids until she was 26 it's like like you just said Cody that's not that long to try to you know if she was actually gonna try to be inclusive and say hey do you want to get engaged and travel the world for five years and then

settle down like that's probably what this guy was planning on and she's just like you don't want none of this i fully think she was trying to make him kick her out at that point and it didn't work and she was like oh crap and then she got scared but she was on the show long enough to get all the fame that she wanted and she's just out because now she doesn't want the commitment and she wants to travel the world. And yeah. But yeah, I just I didn't it didn't sit right with me. And yes, I agree.

Her acknowledging that these things are what she wants to do at that age. That's great. That's great that she knows what she wants. Finding herself shows that it's a little general. It's a little generic. Every girl says that that's yes but my biggest thing that i take away from her saying that is that these are her immediate problems in life and he's 29 he's 29 and like dealing with somebody oh i have midterms

next week it's i don't know when i'm 29 if i hear someone say the word midterm to me i'm gonna slap them in the face it's just like natural reaction like i'm just gonna cock back smack them around a little bit but that's just me well kit's a mess but so she had her conversation with matt he seemed receptive to it didn't say anything bad was just like yeah that's fine and that was that but he ended up giving rachel the rose from the group date and then he's like oh i have a secret uh not a secret it's a secret yeah he's like i have a secret for you so where are we going and i go into a hall aloe blacks playing music again which it was like two weeks ago he was there too right like is he just like in quarantine at

you can tell everybody you can tell everybody. You can tell everybody. I thought it was going to be a Beats commercial. They were just going to put him on. Rachel's going to walk back into the house with just, you can tell everybody. They do like an Avicii hologram and they bring him back and he plays like it's a Avicii song.

It just turns into like a nightclub. Too soon, too soon. Our first artist sponsor is going to be by Aloe Blacc. He's going to do the intro to this podcast i would love that that'd be the best thing in the world he's like the first aloe black like i feel like relatively mainstream-ish like person i'm like oh that's actually like a pretty decent name like who did they have earlier in the season it was like like temecula road or something like that they had they always do a bunch of country artists which like i don't listen to country so they're the duo of the musical bachelor winners right wasn't that a thing

you like find love but also you're oh listen listen to your heart listen thank you i don't know how i could forget that title it's so good but yeah either every time they have a date and it's oh i got a surprise for you it's either're going to listen to this band that no one knows who they are and are kind of terrifying. Or we're going to look at fireworks. And this time we knew who Aloe Blacc was. Oh, Creed times a thousand. And it's not. No.

What if, what if, put that, put that scenario in there, right? He goes to Rachel. I got a surprise to you. They go into the other room can you take me the same the same rip ball dude is just being launched through the air they actually walk into the thanksgiving halftime show that'd be unreal now that would be worth it that's when you get engaged on the spot but i would love to and this is another thing brie had the first real tear i've seen in like eight episodes the rose was given to rachel they cut to brie one tear streams

down her face either she's the only person there that can act or she was actually sad but even this episode when people were going home left and right i i don't remember if abigail cried or not i was too just like upset by that whole situation to pay attention no other girl in the last three episodes has shed a real tear they just keep wiping their eyes and their eyes start tearing up but that's because they're just jabbing themselves in the eye every other side it's not acting they're trying not to cry to not mess up their makeup they're not trying to ball their eyes out So I give them some credit. I think it goes like, how much of a connection can you form with someone in six weeks to where you're like, I'd be more decimated that like, oh man, I didn't make it to the final two and I don't have the opportunity to be the next Bachelorette. Like, that's what I would be mad about.

Not that like, I didn't get with this guy, no, for maybe six weeks and get an engagement that I'll probably break off in two. Zach, they would say that you're there for the wrong reasons. Obviously. Team Juan Pablo. Not only a guy that you've only known for six weeks, but a guy that you've only known for six weeks and maybe have talked to individually for an hour total. It is ridiculous the amount

of time they talk to him. Michelle, she cried after one week of being there, man. This is is real this is serious michelle could beat all of our asses too though that girl could kick the shit out of me the cut of her at the end doing push-ups her lats were just popping dude she looked like a cobra like a condor just like flying through the air insane wingspans ridiculous but then so so kit then goes to matt she's upset and this is this is another thing that adds up to the theme that matt james never knows what's happening kit is obviously upset she her

heads down walking in she seems so sad and she's listing out everything they talked about and she looks like she's about to cry now the whole time it's like like ear to ear smiling just like yeah i know we did talk about that it was great like he has no idea what's happening at any point i'm convinced he is his brain is just the monkey with the symbols like there's just nothing going he's not processing anything that's happening as soon as they compliment him like to start a conversation he just like leans back and like looks down his nose at him and smiles and you know it's over he's not listening to anything else they say and it happens every time but they they start talking

kit brings up their whole conversation and she's saying oh remember all this stuff we talked about i just i don't feel like as good after i took all of this as she didn't get the immediate immediate um like reinforcement she wanted from that conversation she didn't get the rose and that was her being spoiled and being like oh i didn't get what i want i'm out that's how i took that whole thing i like i said earlier just think she thought he was going to take it badly before and he didn't and she was just looking for a way out and now i was like oh crap now i have to go just like self-eliminate because i don't want him to go to hometowns or my family to come there at least so i respect that she's self-limited but also i don't because she just got on tv to get on tv she's 21 like she wasn't ready for any of that well and

they just had a conversation where she said she said in a in um one of the little interviews after their conversation that she was developing these feelings and falling in love he doesn't give you a rose you guys didn't have a bad conversation he doesn't give you a rose. You guys didn't have a bad conversation. He doesn't give you a rose. And all of a sudden you're not feeling up to his standard. That's, that is insanity. That is, that is a 21 year old mindset right there.

That is actually a 21 year old. I do think I agree with Brian completely, but also maybe a part of it is she doesn't want to be rejected on tv too because it's like if she doesn't get picked then she's lost and that maybe looks bad like i do think it's i think it's an image thing either she walks off and she got the attention she wanted and it's a win or she stays long enough and then gets sent home and she gets sent home not the way she wants when i i mentioned this and this happened in colton season there were like five separate girls who knew that they were probably next on the chopping block and they sent themselves home for some nonsense they were so into him and then they knew that they were

going to be in the coming weeks and then they all started sending themselves home which i hate because it defeats the purpose like of so much of the show like it's just giving up and it's very artificial and icky i mean matt has sent like five or six girls home in like the last three weeks without it being a rose ceremony so he's kind of defeating the purpose of the show himself yeah i mean he acts like self-righteous about you know like i just want i want them to know where i stand i you know i take pride and you know don't want to lead them on it's like buddy you could have waited two hours and just sent him home like to the rose ceremony like you're not doing them any favors and like in the case of abigail it probably would have worked out better for you if you were just like had a conversation and then were like hey i'm sorry like i can't give you the rose like he could

literally send minimal words and gotten away with it but he's like nah i'm gonna have the worst breakup speech of you know the last 20 let them have some drinks before getting sent home just cocktail hour just let them have some drinks and then they just yeah well so if he didn't send kit home or if kit didn't send herself home who do you think goes home in her place i think he still sends her home you know yeah there's no way you bring a 21 like i think the age discrepancy is just too big like i'm i'm surprised he kept her on this long there's like rumors apparently that he's like he wants her as a connection and when he goes back to new york because of her like family ties and stuff like that so like there's like rumors that he might be keeping around for that reason i mean let's let's call this what it

is matt james is the bachelor because he's friends of someone from the like from the show yeah like absolutely so i him going into the show i was always a little skeptical but my last my last thought on the kit thing let's say brie really does think this is for real and she quit her job and all that brie didn't get the rose and she sat there and manned up and took it and stayed for the ceremony kit left because she didn't get a rose and get what she wanted out of that conversation that shows like that shows such a low level of like maturity and like granted she doesn't know about the brief thing but it some people could be taking this much more seriously than she did is what i'm saying yeah fair and it's insanity last thing for kit she did the reverse uno hit him with the butt

in the middle of the conversation it was great to see you could hear the music changing and she was like but i think it's not gonna work out blah blah blah great to see because he did that earlier to like three girls he's gonna do it later to a girl good for him to get one himself but so after kit pulled him to the side for a one-on-one to break up with him pretty much the next one-on-one card was given out and it was jessenia who was the last one who even had a one-on-one yet so good she's not just like left out without one going into the last rose ceremony which would have been horrible and so honestly one of the coolest dates on the bachelor that i've seen like what a waste of time what a waste of time this date was you could tell

he wasn't into it. Tokyo Drift Yesenia coming in hot, baby. Matt chose that date because he's like, I don't like this girl, but I'm going to have a good time and just whip a car into some boxes. It was a good pick. It was a good pick by him. Her helmet was looking like a watermelon on her head. Way too big for her body. Definitely a fun date but in reality at that point we her going into the one-on-one we all know that it's because she's going home we all know this is him

ultimately deciding that she's going home what i love too is and matt's in this a couple times is when a a girl on a date expresses emotion towards him that he doesn't reciprocate and the girl be like i'm falling in love with you like it'll hard cut to matt and his his face will like boom it'll just like drain his eyes we'll get really serious and he's like well i've got a surprise for you would you like me to walk you to the car i feel like jessenia only said that because she knew it was coming like it's her like her last ditch effort to save herself in this season is to pull out it's the hail it's the hail mary exactly it's the hey i quit my job card didn't work yeah

but hey i quit my job is draw four she pulled out like a draw two it didn't work as well she's no it's the skip card she's like no just skip over me yeah there did i mean it was a fun date it was just we all knew we all knew that this was this was the party before the funeral you know and then they go they go into this beautiful room this girl i'm watching with goes oh it's so cute i was like yeah this beautiful room is where she's about to get dumped on national television she's never gonna forget this but i only wish she tokyo drift out of the whole entire show she gets in the car she just drifts out what she just learned see ya that would be pretty sweet so jessenia gets sent home good riddance she was a bully and nonsense the whole time just

was not entertaining to be on tv not a good person no which led into the second rose ceremony of the episode which there's only two roses chris harrison comes out of the first rose like put sent out he's like all right this is the final rose it's like there's only two roses we don't need you to come out to tell this but yes chris harrison douchebag we can get into that if you want uh well let's finish the episode yeah yeah so pipe who got the first two roses i forget the final four ends up being rachel brie michelle and serena so michelle and serena were the two that got the roses no yeah or no serena already had one brie and michelle br Brie and Michelle. Brie and Michelle both get them. Piper.

Remember when I said karma is a fickle bitch? Get your stuff and get out. See ya. Speaking of dresses, terrible dress on her. Looked like a prom dress. I'm like, what are we doing? Also, she stomped out of there like she was a third grader. Kind of how she stomped out of the date.

When Heather interrupted, she was pouting. And I'm like like this is what you signed up for and she's like this is the last time i opened up my heart and feelings on national tv i'm like honey this is probably the last time you'll be on national tv you don't have to worry about that yeah she her her being an a-hole to heather i thought was very telling of her character her leaving not saying a word to matt and like getting in the car and slamming the door. I was like, okay, good riddance, sweetie.

Like hope you enjoy these 800 Insta followers. You're about to get, cause people don't like you right now. She was pissed. Like it wasn't Victoria levels of like rude and nonsense on the way out, but it was still like, look at him. Victoria's was funny.

Victoria's at least brought brought some giggles into the end of the world it was bad i was surprised she went home though honestly like he always seemed like so into her he loved he really really likes michelle and i think we just don't see like very much of it yeah it's weird the the final four is like rachel i feel like it's like separated into two groups it's like well like even like i feel like rachel is the one he's like lusting after is the one he's probably picking the other three are like reasonable adults that you could probably see him ending up with like he's not should we just do picks now yeah it's in the end i i don't think if you disagree with who's winning at this point you're a lost child someone needs to call your parents and pick you up

rachel is winning yeah there's no there's no ifs ands or buts about it rachel is absolutely winning this rachel is gonna put through matt through get out next week and they're gonna stay together they're gonna rewrite the end of that movie and they're gonna stay together to segue and combine this into the chris harrison stuff i think the reason this is my theory off the top of my head the reason he's chris harrison's defending rachel so much is because she wins and so you need to kind of like absolutely save face for the bachelor itself otherwise i don't think he would have i think still think he's not great but douchebag captain went down with the ship hard i think that's a factor in it too though but let's let's let's just go round table let's

get the picks done bra guy are you picking rachel i i picked her like three weeks ago i'm sticking with it because he's gonna pick the person who's not right for him by like a little bit. That was a great call, Byrne. You called that. That was a great call. Thank you. Thank you. Round of applause.

One clap. Thank you. Cody, who are you picking? Well, do we want Rachel gone or should I pick somebody else? I want your legitimate thought. This is interesting. We have the power right now. If Cody picks her, she's out.

Pick her. I don't want to pick her. That's too obvious. So I'm going to go with Michelle because in the back of his mind he's like, if I marry this girl, we have three kids. At least one is going to be a professional athlete. Done.

He's thinking about that that it's the long con he's thinking those future earnings smart rooks are you picking i already said it man it's rachel it's 110 rachel i completely agree with you that that's that's why they're trying to defend her so hard there's been so much trying to defend her image they don't do this for anybody unless unless they're going to win the show or unless they're going to play a big part, unless they're going to eventually be the bachelorette, which God, I hope she isn't. But it's going to be Katie. I wish. But now I now I kind of want her to just get away from this. I want her to just be awesome on her own.

You know, maybe come on our podcast. Katie, if you're listening, you're welcome anytime. But I think it's a super obvious choice here. gotta you gotta pick rachel i'm sorry michelle zaddy zaddy oh it's rachel there's no doubt about it brian you're 100 right i'm starting to think that you work for abc i got a good brain that's it like there's there's they haven't they haven't had a real conversation still like i'm on i'm i feel like i'm channeling my inner rooks right now like she's saved her actual conversation like she's gonna be the final two and they haven't talked about anything at all and she's gonna be like my favorite color is blue and he's gonna be like oh

my god she opened up to me wow this is crazy i can't believe you would share that side of you with me it's it's insane to me like yeah she's winning no doubt about it i'm just here for the giggles it's it's it's gonna be raquel and i i agree with cory 100%. None of these girls, I feel like, have very base level understanding of what their relationship is with Matt. So that's why it's going to go from zero to 150 when they meet their parents so quickly. And I'm interested to see how Matt reacts, how the women react. But yeah, I mean, you buy a girl red bottom shoes and you're not doing that for anybody. You got to put a ring on that. Matt definitely did spend his own money out of pocket for those red bottoms.

One hundred and ten percent. Absolutely. Yeah. So then we go on the previews into hometowns. I love the previews for hometowns. They always look like they're going terrible. Ninety percent of the time, nothing really happens. There's going to be one parent that's overprotective obviously every single time that's the only drama and then

one probably one parent will say i don't know if she's ready and matt'll be like i think she is because matt just doesn't process anything that's being said but preview looked a little nutty yeah dude serena's look like it goes actually bad though like out of all the previews i've seen for hometowns like her parents are like you don't seem like you're that into him at all and she like starts crying it's like do you know do you know why that is because she's not that fucking into him she didn't want to kiss him when they were just like practically stoofing already no i, I'm just kidding. I get her being like awkward. Yeah, I'm being an asshole.

But yeah. Yeah, Serena's looks like it goes bad. Rachel's looks interesting to say the least. And then we got Bree. I'm excited to see Bree's mom because she's going to be like she's only 13 years older than Bree. That's insane.

That's pure insanity. I forgot about that. Bree told Matt that on the first one-on-one. Crazy. Matt's the long plays. I just want to meet your mom. Only 13 years older. Just like it's the long play.

And then who's our fourth? Michelle. like didn't really show much of michelle's yeah it's gonna be it's gonna be the same thing like it is every single year except there's obviously gonna be new drama whatever it'll be interesting but like what always i just don't understand is like the contestant never comes up with like the parent or sibling or whoever is going to ask, you know, what makes my daughter different than the other like 20 girls you've been dating? And they never have a reason. They're like, oh, we've just, you know, I just really understand your daughter. Like on that level, we've really hit it off. And it's just like, they don't, you would think they would have a reason. You would think he's sitting there like in the

quarantine hotel room being like, okay, so why are these girls still here and why am i meeting their parents and they just he just never they never have a reason the perfect example of that was peter's season because peter being the bachelor that was repeating himself every time he had a conversation with a girl every time he talked to a parent it was just she's just been so great with this process and i'm just so lucky to have her on my season and like she's just been fantastic and then they cut to the next one it's literally just regurgitated into that one it's so it's it happens every time i'm hoping matt at least has some variety to it and doesn't say the same thing over and over again. But I don't know if there's enough going on up here up in his brain for for multiple responses, except for Rachel.

I think Rachel will actually give like some better answers than the other ones. Like your daughter's hot. He'll also be fighting for his life there and trying to figure out what's going on in that world but i hope the mother of rachel has like a little teacup and does the thing from get out he goes into the sunken place oh it's oh god the preview also the only thing that i saw from the preview that i actually want to know about is they go skydiving. I don't know which girl it was. And they literally kind of crash into the ground pretty hard.

It's Rachel. Is it Rachel? It looked bad. I'm about 90% sure the first preview is Matt voiceover. Oh, sometimes in love, you just got to take a jump. And it's him. And they cut to a girl. I'm pretty sure it's Rachel in there.

She eats shit. Her face gets thrown into the ground. It looks crazy. She's going to be showing up to the hometown in a wheelchair, and they're going to be like, what happened? I think it's the long con. She's just trying to get some pity points from him. It's a smart move.

They're about to jump out. Hey, throw me into the fucking ground when we get down there. Just throw me into the ground. Don't open the chute fucking ground when we get down there. Just throw me into the ground. Don't open the chute. Do not open the chute. Just let me go. It's going to be the final rose ceremony. She'll be in a wheelchair.

Everyone else is standing up. It's going to be great. It's going to be big yikes. But yeah, let's. So episode over, Insanity. We got nothing but Insanity coming up for these next couple weeks of the show. But outside related, we got nothing but insanity coming up for this these next couple weeks of the show but outside related we got chris harrison you stupid stupid idiot you stupid stupid stupid man like what was your interview that he was on he's doing a racial an interview with racial lindsey the first the first

i think person of color ever to be bachelor bachelor yeah bachelorette um he's doing an interview with her they talk about they're bringing up um racial being in pictures like when she was in college their sorority had deep south parties where they're all dressed a little um as Chris Harrison would just oh it was like fine you know we weren't as woke in 2018

that's true it was 2018 you're a fucking idiot brother um yeah he goes in this interview they're talking about it and with an interview he's, he's being interviewed by Rachel Lindsay. And he's just very, very not like, he's not dismissing it at all. And he's just saying, oh, we're just, we're just like, I don't like cancel culture. And we weren't as woke as we are now.

And it's, it is part of the problem and i just i think it's if if he does feel that way man you just missed the easiest softball of all time to cover yourself you couldn't you couldn't just say i think it's bad you're a you're a fucking idiot for that but i think it just shows that this is how he really feels about this which is sad and it sucks because he's always everybody loves chris harrison he's been the voice of reason on the show for so long he's always the one comforting them but how else would you know it's the last rose like honestly exactly we're gonna be lost as hell now it was bad though like like you said it's softball questions all you have to do is like yeah it's not good she's probably gonna put out a statement blah blah i don't agree with it and then move on and that's like save your butt save their butt even if you don't feel that

way don't actively like dig yourself a hole and just move on like and you're talking to rachel lindsey too like there's nothing good that's gonna to come out of that. You're not going to convince her that it wasn't racist when she already thinks it was. Like, it was bad. Well, and if you're, let's say, so he released a statement after saying, oh, I wish I was more educated and I just didn't know all this stuff. If you really felt that way, your ass would have said that, your ass should have said that in the interview and you should have said hey like i think it would have been kind of like somewhat powerful for him to say something like that and be like on in a national like an like a filmed interview oh i would like more education on this i want to know more about this because i don't genuinely know what the issue is that's one thing but him just being a dick about it it shows his true colors he's a dickhead and supposedly he's stepping away for the time being but like it's not like they're filming currently so like he's stepping away yeah

he'll be we'll see him we won't see him on after the final rose that's the big oh that he's actually finale and after the final rose because that's that's not like that's live aired he won't be on that i mean he won't be on the final rose interesting is it like confirmed he won't be or is that just what people assume yeah they put out a statement good there's actually something he's stepping away because when i read i was like oh he's stepping away from what at this point like the show's already filmed the next one hasn't started so you just make it sound like you're actually have some consequences to this but you don't but that's cool at least there's something we'll see if he he also still could have like defended her by saying the blanket statement of

everybody makes mistakes and like rook said then go through the powerful like i need like we should all learn from this blah blah blah and go like you know it helps everybody i agree with that i think there's just more and more pictures and stuff coming out of her doing it to where i don't i think if he says that it's going to come off the same way as what he said because there's so much evidence now of like her not really being the most yeah as they would say the most educated and knowledgeable about the situation you know yeah but yeah chris harrison confirmed asshole big yikes big yikes guy big yikes of the week goes to chris harrison congratulations off the island put out his torch. He's gone.

Let's move in. We have this guest. Big ol' Zaddy. It's Valentine's Day. We want to give you guys, so sports are over. We got some more stuff to talk about. We're not just sports guys. We're not some sports boyos only.

Zach's going to talk to us a little bit about some hinge. We're going to get into some Valentine's day stuff. Let's start racking it off. Zach, what do you got for us? That's right. I'd figure, you know, Valentine's day might be over, but love is still in the air gentlemen. And we need to give, I feel like I have an obligation. No, nay I say a duty to give the people certain advice tips tricks maybe some fun stories along

the way of my experiences dating throughout the pandemic uh mostly online obviously because social we're socially distanced podcast obviously i believe yeah um that's true that's true so figure we can run through some quick high level topics here of about hinge now there's for your there's several dating apps online that you can use hinge is mine my preference i don't know brian what's your uh dating app of preference as the uh other single guy in this podcast as a christian person uh i like to uh find people who are jewish because you know that makes sense yes no comment okay um um so yeah so i figure so hinge is the one i use to basically give a quick rundown of hinge you post pictures and then you also post like different prompts as well so i

found it helps get the conversation going a little easier because you can answer a question directly they vary from like you know my most embarrassing thing is blah blah blah a life goal of mine is this find it like very i'm way easier tacos tacos are my favorite thing oh buddy let me tell you i got some so i figure we go like like the top top three things like like like rules i've made for both guys and girls i know the girls one might be a little more like controversial considering i am not one but figured i at least put it out there of what i see when i'm swiping i want to get your guys' perspectives. So we'll start with tips for, we'll start with the guys' ones.

So my first rule is no pictures of you holding a fish unless if it's a really cool fish. Like, it's got to be like a shark or like, shark or above in terms of like coolness for a fish. A marlin, obviously. Thatness for a fish. Where does Sting... A marlin, obviously. That looks like a fish. Where does Stingray rank on this list? Is that above or below shock? Killed Steve Irwin, so that's got to be above. Yeah, post Steve Irwin, we're in a good space.

Pre-Steve Irwin, if you're holding the Stingray, it's bad news. But we're in a good space now because we're avenging Steve Irwin. What about jokingly holding a goldfish at the county fair? No. I think that's probably actually one of your photos.

I don't have photos. You're smiling. I'll say, Cody, if it's not in the bag and you're holding it as if you just caught it. You can't just have it in the bag. Clearly you take it out of the bag. If you're holding the fish, either it's funny or you're going to look terrifying. There's no in between.

The last girl I went on a date with off hinge, one of her prompts was, I hope you don't have a photo of yourself holding a fish. So exactly. There's some agreement. Exactly. Right. Right. So that's the first one. So the second one for guys when creating their general dating profiles, when the prompt is listed as what are you competitive about? And they put, I'm competitive about everything. Like, be a more generic person.

It's so specific, though. It's everything that they're competitive about. Now the girl knows and they can go forward from there. Terrible answer, number one number one number two imagine actually being competitive about every single thing that happens you're basically just saying i'm an asshole yeah you're not competitive you're just a douche like oh i hate it so much though like like you said it shows no personality the point of the promise is to be like okay this is kind of who you are or to start a conversation you can't start a conversation off of i'm competitive about everything unless you just go like no i'm more competitive which like this is so stupid it doesn't go anywhere yeah it's like i can fall asleep faster than you watch all right number three i have is pretty basic but i don't have

this problem cody you probably don't have this problem. Cody, you probably don't have this problem. Brian will probably problem. Don't lie about your height. Oh, it's it's they will find out. And like, whoa, don't round. Don't wow. Wow.

Way to target. Way to target. I'm just saying I'm just going to say this, but also out of the five of us, four of us don't have to worry about this. I'm just going to put it out there. Yeah, why did I get lumped in with Corey? Man, I'm six feet tall. Is he though?

Is he though? You don't know. I am six foot tall. Six feet. Now I will say you- Is it foot or feet? Which one, liar? Feet.

You do get a plus or minus. I'll give you a plus or minus one inch rule. So if you're 5'11", feel free to round up to six foot. If you are 5'10 or lower, you do not get that privilege. They will find out if you ever meet them personally. I feel like girls have a sixth sense without telling like, oh, he said he was six foot. He is clearly 5'11". Look, here's the thing I'm going to say about myself. I am not close to six foot. So there is no reason for me to lie like i gained nothing they would have gained nothing it's just it's you lose so when i'm rounding i round from my five six and three quarters to five

seven like it says on my license okay well this isn't like this isn't like a high school basketball roster where like my height i'm six feet tall when i was when i was in college or when i was in high school on the basketball team on our printed out roster it said i was six foot four it takes zero effort to see that i am not six foot four i am nowhere near six foot four so yeah i agree i agree with zach if you're under 510 i think it's just oh just be honest with it you know also a small spin-off of this which i love and i've seen it on tiktok i think have you seen the videos of like the girls and guys like investigating the size of somebody because they take an object they research the size of that object and they like stack that object on it's so

good yeah i don't want to make it seem like i'm right for height like it's a right thing to height shame i'm just saying if your goal on this dating app is not just to swipe right casually but actually to meet up with some person there's no sense in lying about you're gonna find out one way or the other they're not gonna like just not know how tall they are versus where they're looking at your face when you see them in person yeah exactly well with guys too like you ain't gonna to be wearing heels. I mean, maybe you could wear heels. You don't know my life.

F it, you know what? I take that back. Throw some heels on. Throw on. Wear some heels on. I actually have platform shoes that I like to wear around, mostly when I go grocery shopping.

Mine are actually wedges, but they're Timbs as well. So they're in style. What's next, Zach? All right. So that that was my top three do you guys have any other ones that you would you would put out there otherwise we can move on yeah for guys like things to do or not to do these are mostly uh not not to do because i think they'll stand out a little more stuff because like if i'm in pittsburgh and i'm swiping on girls in pittsburgh and i write hey i like like the steelers that gets you nowhere like maybe you do like the steelers but like you're not gaining any ground on anyone else around you unless you're literally on the team don't put it i wholeheartedly disagree with this because when

you're in the philadelphia area and you just put a simple go birds on there you get a go birds back because philly people are gross i i agree with the sports i think the sports thing is that's a later conversation you know you can come up but that shouldn't be your opener like that shouldn't be what you're hitting lead off what about what about picture of you at a sporting event? I mean, that's fine. I mean, that's fine. Yeah. As long as it's not like a weird action pose of you being a fan or something. For some reason, when you first said that,

I pictured you standing there with your hand raised like you're going to cheer. And a third person was like, this guy's really into the game and took a picture. Who's putting stock photos of the Steelers games that they're getting online as they're in profile i don't know why that was the first thing that came to my head but that's the first thing i thought of it has the getty images watermore like yeah that's pretty i think i i like this at sporting that's one i think it's just look like you like have fun don't don't look like you're a weirdo like look like you like have fun. Don't, don't look like you're a weirdo. Like look like you have friends look like you do things.

But like the guy that has eight pictures of him, just like in a different fit in the mirror, it's like, this is kind of creepy. Where, where's anyone in your life? Where's the window? I haven't seen a window in any of these pictures.

Yeah. I got one too. When, and this is, this is probably for both, uh, pictures with large groups of people but like you continuously like all of your pictures are with you can put a picture of like you know a couple

of your friends like that's fine that's cool if you meet that person you're gonna be meeting those friends anyway like it doesn't matter but when you have like your class photo like over and over again of your whole graduating class of 400 people like the same where's waldo it's not i think it's worse for girls because they'll put up a photo of a group and they have brown hair and then the next photo they dyed it blonde and then the next photo it's like uh i forget the word for it ombre beige no it's a balayage that's the battle star halfway between the two it's like look all i'm basing my like guess on who you are off of is like eyebrows and hair color and if i can't figure it out

because you keep changing both of them i'm lost i'm just gonna swipe left which you could still argue eyebrows is hair color but like shape okay brian first thing brian looks at how are those girls eyebrows just distinguish who they are not like if it's a solo photo, I couldn't care less. Are those eyebrows on the fleek? Yes or no? Yes or if. I think one of my tips would be,

I'm thinking more in pictures, the shirtless pic realm. Yeah. Like, shirtless pic that you didn't take yourself there there can be some explanation behind it if like you're constantly posing in the mirror it's a little weird and then like um i'm losing my train of thought someone else shirtless pic gym selfies is a big, big no,

no. Oh yeah. That's awful. If you're posting, if you're posting, you hitting a mean squat, are you benching or something like that? You're going to,

there's going to be one person that responds to you and they're going to just be like larger than you are. They're like, dang, you got a nice bench. Like they're probably going to say you didn't get deep enough on that squat it doesn't count but if if your opener is like a gym picture or something like just do less just do a whole lot less yeah all right i think we can move on so the the next section i have is what i would deem as a good profile for

women i know this is very subjective don't want to get any of our female listeners mad at this. This is the truth. But this is like something I look at and I'm just like, oh, I've seen this over and over again. We can call it Zach's Bugaboos. There you go. There you go. I like that.

Hey, everybody. Welcome to Zach's Bugaboos. All right. So the first one I have on here is for the ladies' profiles. Don't include anything on your profile about the app itself. So like, oh, we could delete this app together. Or like, what was the worst idea you had? Downloading this app.

It's like you just wasted a prompt. I had a very quick run on Tinder. I was not on it for very long. One of the things I hated reading, which came up a lot, was acting like you're too good for the app yeah we're both here we're both on it we're both reading this like don't be like oh i'm just on here because i'm bored it's like come on i you would you would equate it as you're both walking to a bar and you're talking to this person and this person cannot stop talking about how much they hate the bar that they chose to go to exactly like yeah cool

thanks we're both here we could both have a drink dance and be stupid but you're just gonna complain about why you're serena p bachelor dating method just complain about everything constantly real and right all right this the second one i have and again this could probably apply to either yeah women or men too but just like that when they have the prompt like what is your most controversial opinion and they put uh pineapple is good on pizza i'm just like i'm like you have zero personality like that's not a food. Food topping isn't a personality. Especially keep, let's keep all talks of pizza off of dating app profiles. Tacos. If pizza is one of your big personality traits, we got problems. Just keep it off.

Let's talk about anything else. Tacos and margaritas. Tacos and margaritas. Naps. It's ridiculous. Naps is always one of them. I hate that one because it's like, oh, your favorite thing thing to do is nap so your favorite thing to do is just be unconscious like okay great like you just want to be dead that's like your favorite part about life

perfect awesome all right and the third one i have is it kind of goes back to what we're talking about about like more of like the picture thing and the appearance is, and ladies, I guess, or guys too. I think just girls like wear these more. Like when you need at least, at least three out of your five pictures need to not have you wearing

sunglasses. Oh, because sunglasses cover up so much of your face. And granted, I wear sunglasses because I think they make me look better. Like some days, like I get why people wear them, but like,

if I'm trying to like really like form a relationship with you and make a conscious decision, like I need to have, I need to see more of your face in more of your pictures than not. Like if, and girl sunglasses are giant. So it will cover like 25% of your entire face. It's like, you can't tell what they look like. If you see their whole eyes and like part of their nose and eyebrows,

that like changes a lot about what you actually look like. Huge, huge callback to the eyebrows brian's mentioning too you can't it's hard to judge the eyebrows when you can't see the eyebrow guy i don't know we're learning about myself everybody learns about themselves on the podcast to put that in my profile all right does anyone have any i'll kind of wrap it up any when you're swiping or when when some of you were formerly swiping what would like either turn you off turn you on in terms of like good prompts or anything like that like what what would you guys like to see on a female's profile i like random shit i like them saying something like very out there and stupid and goofy.

Yeah. Cause I've liked that. I like that kind of energy. Yeah. But I don't like, I don't like anybody that lists the requirements and stuff like that. I don't like any, that kind of stuff drives me absolutely insane.

You listed a lot of the ones that I hate, but the only other ones are like ones where they just seem angry all the time like the ones where it's like i'm competitive and stuff like that or just like i'm better than you and all these things or like the sarcasm one is always big of like people just don't understand my sarcasm it's like no you're just being a dick to everybody that's not sarcasm so you can tell like if people are generally happy based on their prompts too that kind of turns me off yeah i mean i just i think there's more that would i would swipe left for than there would be something that i would go right on you know what i mean like it's it's so much easier for

me to go left if it's like one thing that I'm like, this is weird. This is like all the things that we just listed. Right. I, I, I think genuinely if it was like, oh, like based on your pictures and your responses, I do like Brooks's point about like random comments, like something like really like we were saying being broad sucks. Cause it's like, what was it? What do you hate or what

are you something the answer was everything what are you competitive forget what it was it's yeah what are you competitive about everything it's like oh great but if you were to put something like really specific like be hilarious yeah it'd be so funny and i'd be like wow this person is actually like really funny like so i guess there's like be as detailed as possible like i don't know i think i'm a true believer on these things to just be short sweet and just yeah like this sounds dumb cliche but just be you like just have some personality show like show who you are don't i don't like like movie quotes and stuff like that and like some unless they're super specific and you're

hoping somebody will like recognize it but if it's like if it's if it's i'm like i'm not as i'm not superstitious but i'm a little stitious or something like that everyone knows that quote this isn't this isn't gonna grab anything it's i just i don't like that but just be just be you have a little fun segway off that anyone who puts like something about oh i'm the biggest office fan or anything like that like everybody likes that show it's not unique at all you don't gain any ground it's super indie though yeah super underground you might not know about it's underground show yeah where can i stream that? Peacock. See, it's not even on the mainstream ones like Netflix.

Anyway, what I was going to say. There's no reaction to it. I was expecting a reaction. Horrible joke. It's just a fap. The only thing that really mattered for me was that it looked like they put effort into it at all. Like, cause if they put effort into it, that just means that they're there for the same reasons you are.

And like, if their first picture is like a blurry picture and their first answer is like a single word answer that every single girl puts, that's an immediately sweat, immediate swipe left. It doesn't matter what it says or what they look like. Yeah. Gone.

I agree. Yeah. And I think in this, this stuff that we're talking about as in zach said this too this is for both parties for sure this can be said about both sides just have personality don't do don't do what you think is going to work don't don't have a there are so many times where i this was in college i just saw essays why are you listing out your life requirements to somebody on an app there's a

happy medium between like a little bit of effort and like and then just just just know we're all at the same as cory's analogy earlier we're all at the same bar a lot of times yeah maybe maybe we're not happy we're at this bar but we're all here let's dive into it you know let's let's be present at this bar also like just don't waste other people's time if you're gonna match with somebody like you shouldn't match with somebody if you don't have the intention of at least saying hi to them because like what's the point of matching you've already said you're interested like don't just do it for your own ego i agree too like and that, that's the biggest thing that I think works. Granted, it's hard to do now because quarantine, but that's the biggest thing that works is like,

look, it's, it's the post match. And I don't know if Zach, you had this on your list of things to talk about, but like you both matched, like you matched for a reason. Either you're obviously think you're both are attractive. Like you're attracted to each other like there's got to be something there to say so to Cody's point say something but also like don't like say nothing in those conversations like you can jump and immediately say do you want to go out like and grab coffee like after you realize the person's not a serial killer and they're gonna like respond to you and they seem like a normal person but like what worked for me was we had a conversation Claire and I had a conversation for like a day and it was like do you want to go like out to the bar tomorrow and like

meet in person like the the work was done like you saw each other you're attracted to each other go find out more about that person in person like it's I people and people do this all the time like they have conversations just because they want to have a conversation with someone on the app which is fine by all means but like you got to lay that out there too to the person right like let them know what's going on with where you're as i said earlier headspace is and it'll go you know the way that you intend it whether it's like you're trying to find somebody or not no i i completely agree with that and i want to i want to go back to cody a little too i do agree i hate like why are you on the app if you're not going to talk to anybody

but there's some people like and i'm a little guilty but i always responded let's let's be real i always responded but this is something that i noticed that i'm sure little guilty but i always responded let's let's be real i always responded but this is something that i noticed that i'm sure a lot of people notice it's a good feeling when you match with somebody a lot of people just want that like serotonin kick of oh this person they put it in me but no this person this person finds me attractive this person finds me entertaining and interesting that's a good feeling you know and i think a lot of people a lot of people chase that while some people are using it like using the apps to meet people and use it what

it's for other people are using it to keep the self-esteem up and go boost get that serotonin you should be able to give a blanket response on hinge saying like thanks for the ego boost that's why i'm on here it's just like a button you click and then the person that match knows you know what respect i got i like i like a good ego boost that's all they wanted they got it at least i'm not expecting anymore i still think my idea of having a super dislike button should be implemented there's a super like so you go to the front of their list and like they get to see you i want a super dislike so you can swipe left but still send them a comment about why they suck i think it would be

so you can destroy brian why do you want to do that to yourself constructive criticism cody i'm gonna be like i swiped left because I want to see why people don't like me I think I think too and a couple things I think it's like yeah it's as bad as it's to describe it as a formula it's talk for a little bit schedule time and then go from there and then meet in person or because we're in a pandemic over FaceTime or something like that and and what I will say with the pandemic and I I've kind of realized this, it's actually, I think, helped like me personally, just like weed out or like get to know someone a little more over because you can't meet and you can't hang out like every weekend or like do the thing, you know, the one night stand or whatever. Like you actually and from a girl's perspective, too, I think you weed out some of like the creepy guys who are just on there trying to, you know know that night have have something like that and you actually kind of form deeper connections even because you're forced to talk to them with a little bit and if you're not into it like i feel like a girl or a guy can see that right away and understand like okay like this person is clearly not interested

in who i am like i can break it off now i'm almost glad we didn't go on like a first date and i wasted my time because they're clearly not looking for anything more type of thing yeah instead of talking for like one day and then go into a bar and having extremely awkward first date, you'll have talk for a couple of days, FaceTime, see that they look like their photos, see that conversation over like voice instead of text is still normal.

And like inch your way to it. It's almost like an, it's almost like a job application. It's like the application is your profile. We've accepted it. You're in contact. We need to do the phone interview. We need the Zoom interview. Okay, now the in-person one. Let's go to the panel interview next. Can I have everybody? Yeah, panel interview. We're going to

meet the parents this week. That's when you meet the CEO. There you go, full circle. Exactly. All right. I think I have a couple more. I don't know. I think we have a couple more i don't know i think we have i think we have a question from a listener and then i figure at the end i can just rattle off some of these like like uh rapid fire things i've uh i've written down so i don't know cody do you have a question from a listener we do and they're under the guise of a non-aminity however you say that so the question is this girl i want to talk to his friends with my next door neighbor but doesn't know i know that because i found out on ig and i don't know how to talk to my neighbor about it to see if she'd be willing to help me out sorry there was no punctuation in

there i had trouble reading that it's so so he or she he or she their neighbor who they know is friends with somebody that he or she is interested in yeah and they want to know how to get the neighbor to throw the alley-oop to them exactly or no but the neighbor but does the neighbor doesn't know that this caller like found them isn't and is interested in them so it's like they can't casually bring up like, Oh, this person that you don't even know that I know I'm interested in. I'm lost. Right?

Yes. They are trying to form, they are trying to form the connection between the person who's calling in and their person that they like through the, the, you know, the, the guys,

the guys of this next door neighbor who doesn't know that, you know, the guys of this next door neighbor who doesn't know that, you know, that connection wants to happen. It's a step-by-step process. There's a problem. They're trying to get a middleman and the middleman doesn't know that. He's a middleman. Right. They don't know they're the middleman, but they want help from the middleman.

So step one, the middleman needs to know that he's the middleman. So it's like's like it's a two-step solution so you need to figure out you have to lead off saying you have to lead off with your intentions you have to you have to use the middleman as the advantage you need to whine and dine the middleman first you have to let the middleman know what you're feeling and that you're interested i don't think it's necessarily weird for you to say, oh, I saw someone on your IG. Like, who is that? Does this person know the neighbor's friend at all?

Or is it just they saw the neighbor tagged with someone and they're like, I want to know that person. It is unclear, but I would assume they at least follow them on Instagram so they know they exist okay I would assume the latter so like they know the person we can discuss both if you don't know the neighbor's friend at all and you're just like hey hook me up with your friend but you're not cool with your neighbor

there's no way you're gonna go about that like easily that's a long call yeah that's gonna be a difficult sell you have to definitely in that situation you have to tread much lighter it has to be like it has to it has to come up organically somehow and then you also have to be very very chill with the neighbor i feel like like you have to be boys with the neighbor or else they're not gonna help you out that's key because at this point it's's your neighbor. So how long are you living there? If this is like one of the neighbor's really good friends also,

like how well do you know that neighbor where you want to like upset them? I don't know if you would upset them. I'm just saying like if you're boys with your neighbor or girls with your neighbor, like, okay, it seems like that's probably easier because it's like hey like i saw your friend on instagram like he or she is cute blah blah but if it's like you don't know your neighbor that well it's gonna be probably a little bit weird and if they feel some type of way about it they might you know it might reflect bad and cause your life a little bit more trouble because they're your neighbor like they're around all the time i i what if you don't talk to the neighbor

directly but you like dm the person you're interested in and like either if it's a picture that you see them together be like oh like hey and you just try to start a conversation and then bring up oh by the way like is that your friend or something i think you know they're my neighbor assuming again you know the neighbor not just being like a creepy like look out the window but like and just be like oh and that can get you talking and like oh like yeah we're really good friends like i don't know if it would get you anywhere in terms of like a guaranteeing you a date but it would help further the conversation a little bit i'm just trying to think of ways to like from that perspective like do you even need to interact with the neighbor at all so by further reading this question a few times

it seems to me that this person knows the girl they're into but not the neighbor but doesn't know the neighbor and has found out she is friends with the neighbor girl well why why does the neighbor even matter just talk to the talk to the yeah at that point yeah if they're like closer to the person they're interested in then the neighbor is just they don't yeah like you don't just go talk to anything by being buds with the neighbor you're like trying to like make the girl you like like you more because you're gonna be friends with their friends like you're thinking about it too much you need to just like the girl and she needs to like you somehow

and that's the end of it like just playing games just strike out in the DMs like 99% of the population I'm gonna tell him or her to not strike out in the DMs and like be a normal human and not slide into anything has anyone here ever slid into DMs? be a normal human and not slide into anything. Has anyone here ever slid into DMs? No, I can say it.

I may have not either. Like of a famous person or just of any person? Any person. I feel like that's the easiest way. You comment on a story or you comment on a post. No, no, no. If you have their phone number and you slide into your DMs that's weird but if you don't have their phone number i feel like that's a completely valid way to not a comment not a post not like a dm a straight

direct message yeah okay that's different than just commenting on a post and be like hey this looks cool or like i've been there before that's really like not intrusive but just like a straight up like hey to like someone you don't know got it gotta contact them somehow you say hey and you like all of their first five pictures from three years ago no you just don't like them and then they know what's good they know what the deal is no you like all of their their first five pictures ever you scroll all the way back and you like their first shows it shows you care we're in 2011 here yikes all right so i think i think in summary i think in summary you don't really need to get the neighbor involved no i feel like you just got to kind of go for it i feel like it's just

extra work fully yeah and i think if you're if you're more direct i think it then it comes out better to them as well because it's not it's not not, oh, I had your friend like set us up. It's more, oh, I'm interested in you and talk to you and then happenstance, you're friends with my neighbor type thing. We're in the same bubble type of thing. Yeah, I think it looks less, I think you just be direct

and go after what you want to go after, man. Shoot your shot. It's not trying to play all the games to set it up right. It's not really going to affect it. Yeah, it's 50-50. Russian roulette, baby. Shout out Hickey. Shout out Ryan Hickey who said Russian roulette was a 50-50 chance

because you either get shot or you don't get shot. Hey, depends on how many chambers there are. It's a normal gun. There's eight chambers. It's not a 50-50 gun. There's one bullet. It's depends on how many chambers there are. It's a normal gun. It's not a 50-50 gun. It's not a two-barrel gun. He'll be on the show sometime. I think it's 50-50. That'll be the one question we ask him.

Oh, there might be a few more. We'll see. Oh, there'll be plenty. But hey, we appreciate you reaching out to us. You got five different points of views there. Take it and run with it. If anybody ever has questions, send them in. We got you.

It might not be the best advice. It might not work. But hey, we're here to give you advice. It's horrible advice. It's not going to work. But we want to do it. Exactly. Okay, here we go. All so all right we're coming out of

personality season into hot boy bummer summer so here are some things you guys should remember um also kind of going back to the dating profile thing there's no need to put sometimes for drinking just put yes or no it will suffice i'm not going to think you're an alcoholic for putting yes um so plan a date out somewhere that's not your apartment. Like we're not in college anymore. Going back to like, if you're talking about kit and being 21, like just, just put in a minimal effort and usually the opposite sex will, or the same sex, whoever you're dating will be completely fine with it. What if they're midterms the next day?

Uh, library date. You have a dope apartment. You like have a mansion. Um, next thing, uh, don't Venmo girls money trying to be nice to like try to buy them coffee or something because they will dump you two days later so don't don't don't do that um nope nope hey we're moving on we're moving on we're keeping this moving um uh so when you get there if if you want to i think always taking shots at a date helps ease the tension a little bit it kind of loosens you up a little bit if that's your thing um also why the fuck does every girl have the same name on a dating

app it's like ashley uh hayley jess it's like the same four names i don't know if there's some algorithm going on there but it's like the same five names um guys guys like flowers as well ladies so like i would love a bouquet of flowers like like just because i'm a guy doesn't mean i don't appreciate flowers. Flowers are great. Any immediate thoughts from the group? Good? Rapid fire enough? Great. Thanks for talking. If a girl starts

talking about the porn they like on date number two, you kind of have a choice to make. You can go kind of the freaky route or you can kind of cut it off. And that's just a choice every guy's got to make. I want to hear more about this. Rooks, your hand is up. Oh. to cut it off and that's just a choice every guy's got i want to hear more about rooks your hand is up oh see it thanks buddy see you next week wait wait no stop stop stop what's this or at least i didn't know what the category of porn was she was just this is cut this is gonna be cut if you want it or you don't no all right

that's up to you well it was just like it was very aggressive on like uh what was like she was just like yeah like i just like to see what like like my partner wants to watch and so i'll watch them watch porn and like it was i was just like this is a little much for this is date number two so i was like okay like i'm all for that like but just like date number two is a little early to bring it up a smidge early um okay where were we okay um oh don't worry about how quickly you're texting someone back we've got enough anxiety in our lives about overthinking about how quickly you're texting someone back if it's right away you're good they're not gonna care if it's if you the only thing is you don't wait too long yeah like that's the thing like there's no such thing as too quick versus there is such a thing as too long. I feel like.

Fully agree. Been scorned by that before. Text me back, please. Yeah. Yeah. When you have a dog in the room while you're doing the sexy time, it's kind of weird, especially when it's a Great Dane. So don't. So I guess like if obviously if you know someone for a long time, like that's that's like a different thing. But like if it's like the first couple of somebody.

No, I mean, you probably get two different answers depending on who it is. Even though it's funny messaging someone on like a dating app a year after your match and you have and you've had no contact with them is not work and will not be funny. So if I match with someone on February 16th, 2020, and they were like, hey, trying this again, it's not going to work. It's not funny. It's desperate. What's your average? What are you shooting on that one? What was Andre Drummond's career three-point percentage?

Whatever that is. All right, so like 8.2? So low. Yeah, like 0.82 percent um uh every guy needs a like a sad boy playlist to get in their feels once in a while so i'd recommend all the all the male listeners to just find a bunch of sad songs if you need recommendations reach out i'll help you create your sad boy playlist when do you play the sad boy playlist when you're sad or when you're trying to get in the headspace of being sad it's when the great dane starts uh it's yes it's yeah that or when it's raining outside um right after a breakup or you're just trying

to get in your feels on like a friday like nothing's going on you put on a little t swift and you're just trying to you know you're just trying to pour a little glass of shard and you're you're ready to go you're getting your feels i'm all about that nothing wrong with that um ladies love bread and any mention of bread so um that's like a thing i guess the conversation is stale you could always just bring up bread ironic that the conversation would be stale and you're gonna bring up bread yeah exactly but a bunch uh and then i i think i touched but the best time to get a girlfriend is in March from a fiscal perspective because you passed all the major holidays. Assuming that her birthday doesn't fall within March to May, you're probably pretty good from a financial perspective. Is that what they call cuffing season, Zach?

No, cuffing season? Cuffing season. Yeah, cuffing season is in October. That's when you have to guarantee you're going to spend buku bucks on going to pumpkin patches, bringing her to Thanksgiving dinner, and then spending money on- Are you knocking pumpkin patches? I just want to make this clear. Am I what?

Are you knocking pumpkin patches? No, I'm not knocking them. I'm just saying you have to know what you're getting into. The pumpkin patches aren't cheap, man. We're in a new age here. Do you know how much it costs to pick some apples at an apple orchard? It's like 50 bucks a bushel. I just go to the local grocery store and say,

Hey, pick out any apples you want. It costs me 10 bucks. Yeah. But you can't take pictures in a pumpkin patch. Like every guy wants to with his flowers and his sad music. I can wear a flannel to it, to,

you know, to the local Kroger, to the local jewel. I have a question. Why is every girl on an inch of a photo holding a pumpkin? It makes no sense. Literally every girl. It's like,

Oh, Oh, Oh, Oh, holding a pumpkin it makes no sense literally every girl it's like oh oh oh the pumpkin patch pumpkin is the equivalent to the fish thousand percent hundred percent it makes no i just it's i don't get it every girl does it there you go for the for the lady listeners and for the guy listeners if you are so annoyed of seeing if you you know, if you're looking at the women's profiles, if you're annoyed at seeing all the pumpkin patches, Hey, think twice about posting your picture with your fish or goldfish at the fair. If you're Cody, that's great advice and vice versa. All right. I think that's, that's all I had. I hope that was enough. Hope the, uh, hope

it was minorly educational. educational um see now we're really in a pickle because i want zach to come back with more of these boogaboos and uh quick quick rapid fire zach rounds but i mean as as a friend i i hope he has some as a friend i'm concerned we could porn and great day well i would yeah the... Yeah, that's for the After Dark version. You know, it's Wednesday, my dude's After Dark. Yeah, I will be, if needed, I can submit maybe like a two-minute Zach's Bugaboo segment,

if that turns to be popular with the audience going forward. Just let me know. I got notes for days on my iPhone. We'll have to have listeners comment to our podcast and let us know if that's a our number one fan denise will let us know she listens to every episode were you taking notes on hinge before or after you knew you were going to be on this podcast uh i had a i had a the list of my yeah yeah, thank you, lawyer Corey. Thank you. Plead the fifth. Plead the fifth. All right.

Well, Zach, thank you for coming on. Thanks for having me, boys. It's been sweet. It's been fun. Zaddy Hinge. A lesson of the day. Don't let a great Dane lick your balls. All right.

See you. Ra-ra Rasputin. Na-na-na-na-na-na-na. Ra-ra Rasputin. Lover of the Russian beat.