It’s Wednesday My Dudes - Ep. 50: A Murder of Island Boys ft. Jeff Goworthy

Episode Date: January 19, 2022

Resident game show host Jeff Goworthy takes over the podcast to lead the boyos through a round of Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader. Bryan thinks France is a country, Cory doesn't understand the water cycle, and Ruxx fails his anatomy classes. Rate us 5 stars and leave a review on Apple Podcasts!  Links here to follow on Social Media! and Find Other Places to Listen!

I have a quick PSA for all the parent It's Wednesday My Dudes viewers in regards to Claire last week and the baby names. If you give your child, and this is a PSA from your neighborhood speech pathologist. Spider-Man. If you give your child some bullshit name with three S's and two R's and you throw in an L and it has six syllables because you're trying to be trendy there's a 100 chance percent chance that i hate you and a 100 chance that your kid also hates you because they're reaching puberty and he still can't say his name correctly so stop with the bullshit can you can you please give us an example of a name with three S's, two R's, and an L in it. I mean, that was just for a little bit of...

Slur. Like, what have we got here? I mean, that was just to really drive the point home. Because I see it all the time. It's my little boy Sirloin over here, but it has fucking 12 S's, multiple R's as well. They call him A1. That's my boy. He's that stance on. Hey, yo, that's. They call him A1. That's my boy. Hey, that's kind of hard.

A1. That's hilarious. But yeah, it's just, it drives me insane when kids can't say their own names. Well, let's, I guess let's, let's, let's piggyback off of last week. Denise, are there any, any names for you that are, are no-goes or any of the names that for you that are green lights for the males out there? Some of the ones that Claire said. And I don't know the science behind this.

It's just like basic name science. I don't make the rules. But I'm not going to say them because I'd like to remain employed. And some of them are my students' names I can think of the top of my head. Write it down. I'll say that works. But there are some that there are some that Claire said. And like the Chad's and Brad's of the world.

I don't know what it is. It's just it's just not it. We all get behind that. That's fair. That's all there is to it. But sirloin, you would date sirloin, though. I would for sure date sirloin. Honestly, the more the more I'm is to it. But sirloin, you would date sirloin though? I would for sure date sirloin. Honestly, the more I'm thinking about it,

a dog named sirloin would be kind of fucking tough. How do you like him though? Medium? Medium rare? A big, meaty, fucking sirloin? It'd have to be like a bulldog though. It'd have to be a pit bull or a bulldog. I would say get like a chihuahua shout out kelly and tino like a tino tiny little size chihuahua name the chihuahua sirloin or petite filet oh fuck it would be yo super random question i was like there was this tiktok i saw where these people were discussing cuddling how do y'all feel about cuddling like

do you cut like if you love it if you're with like significant other like are we cuddling all night are we cuddling just as like a formality to go to sleep and then we go our separate ways what are we doing specifically going that's what i think okay yeah going to bed not just like if watch like watching tv and shit like going to sleep cuddle i think the initial cuddle is nice and then like like, give me my space. I've only like fell asleep. Uh, I like, I like, cause your arm just hurts.

Yeah. Yeah. I don't, I can't, I don't like that. Uh, I like to be cuddled. That's facts. Yo,

I'm not going to lie. Being a little spoon slaps so fucking hard. Slaps hard. Also my God, it like, it's one of those things you don't know until it happens and then it happens and it's like why am i ever the big spoon why am i ever this person you're bigger oh my oh fuck that get behind my hips put your fucking arms around my stomach and fucking cuddle

my ass i know it's nice big into that uh i'm a big back scratch guy i love back scratches so uh claire's that's claire's job and um i don't think she realized that when she signed up for the job but you know she's here and she's she's doing it anyway so is is this like a like actual scratching or is it just like a nice subtle caress of the nails along your back sorry uh column a column b you know i was just curious because they were like talking about it i was like that's that's actually a good point but for me like it's like there's two different ways it could go if i'm leaned over on my side and i got i got like the head on my arm and i'm like fully wrapped like i cannot fall asleep like that there is no way i'm falling asleep like that it's it's i there's so many i've tried so hard so many times to just tough it out

i'm exhausted like the other person falls asleep and it's like now it's like that shit where it's like oh if i move i'm gonna wake them up like i can't do it but like i always just like eventually it's just like now fuck it and i like yank the arm out from the head and they like fucking oh shit like oh great heavens like it's too hot like too like i'll like i like to cuddle but then once you like i'm like too warm i just like i'm like all right like that's it like it's not like like casually slipping away i'm like okay clary like see ya and like just like split up roll on the other side like on opposite sides of the bed and just go to sleep but i will say um to like

separate comforters clutch like separate blankets for like couples sleeping together never thought about it and then i had like my college comforter and then the one here for like the bed and one day we just had both and it was great because we weren't like pulling them away from each other great like solution to a problem i didn't even think i was having at the time but that's just like norm now and it's been fantastic i'll say that file that one away for anyone who needs it yeah no i think i mean who doesn't like are there people that don't like to cuddle? Well, there's some people that it's like once, and this is TikTok comment area here, but it's just people saying like, oh, once we lay down, it's like the kiss goodnight. And then it's like, we're both sleeping.

You know what I mean? I will say, so I can't, I can't sleep like on my side doing the cuddle. Huge fucking proprietor of a head resting on my chest i was just gonna say oh baby you put your head on my chest i'm gonna sleep like a baby number one and like it's gonna be um double standard here you better not fucking move because like i am so settled in and cozy here it's double standard because like if roles are reversed, I'm fucking yanking my arm out and you're hitting your head against the pillow. But, like, I, like, oh, my God. Someone rests their head on my chest.

Like, I can sleep. I can sleep fucking two fortnights doing that shit. Oh, my God. It's so cozy. That's what I was going to say. The chest lay is for sure number one. That should be busting. Is there a preferred day of the week that you

cuddle i don't really like mondays that much like monday is like we we've had a we've both had our day you know and then tuesday it still kind of lags a little bit like tuesday i'm still kind of it's still almost monday but then it is wed, my dudes. had to love it zach is all filling in for rooks at the strip club uh but we got cory what's up nerds we got rooks hey boys we got jeff himself she's back and i'm brian before we get into our game show though as always how our weeks go but first one more thing from last week we're talking about an ai reading our podcast and creating a script for us cory i found something online on github of a script that will do that really so i can send

you that and you can tinker around with it do i have a job now to do great you're the software engineer in this all right so you're the one who actually decipher it and try to figure out how too much so can't complain but thursday we watched i went over to claire's and we grabbed dinner like take out from mad max and we had we watched two movies one of them uh pieces of a woman sad like just depressing like yeah sounds like a murder mystery like chopped up pieces that's where i went it's i wish because it would have been a little bit more interesting uh it's just all around like sad big sad movie um definitely not pick me up uh so we watched that and we watched and then after that we watched

mystic river which is like a 2001 like mystery which i knew was good it's like always under like you know i always look when i go on netflix i look at like the critically acclaimed ones and i've seen like the more recent ones so now i'm working pat now i'm working towards the like 2001 era and it was really good it's like a murder mystery uh and then friday stayed in played video games with the boys boys boys boys um my invite must have gotten lost it's fine do you have xbox no uh i don't have an xbox i just want to play chill guys bro we told you get get on Apex so many times. You got to solve that problem yourself. You play Apex cross-platform.

Saturday I worked in the morning for a footwear launch, so your boy's going to be working on Yeezy launches in the future. Oh, let's go. Yeezy's going to steal. If I could, I would. And then just football. Saturday night football games.

I went 0 for 5 in betting, so. You bet on the Steelers? Call me if you want a hot take. No, I like do. Okay, so I know why I lose bets because it's like I don't want to bet on like 50 to win five dollars on the chiefs winning a game like it's not fun to me so i like try to pick bets that i still think could happen but have i guess like just a bigger return so i bet like nagi anytime touchdown like i just do that because it's like if anyone on the steelers is gonna score a touchdown yeah nagi is probably one of the guys he wasn't and I did I did shit like that so your

boy's uh fan duel account is to zero um so I rate my weekend zero dollars out of a possible whatever my bank account has and I'm unlicking them and deleting the app nice that's it's a tough weekend but I get it Denise it was between that or a dead bald eagle. Have you been watching Peacemaker? No? Okay, never mind. No, I have not. There's a reference from that.

Just the Eagles postseason. Denise, I've heard you had some notes on how your week went. Oh, man. How was your week? I mean, my weekend was decent. Friday.iday what i do friday i went to my parents house i feel like every time i come on this podcast the friday beforehand i'm at my parents house but i had to go pick up my luggage because i'm going to chicago this weekend um so i didn't have any luggage i had to go pick it up um but then i also had like big time migraine on friday which i don't know if you guys get migraines

but they fucking suck and i have these like magic pills for my neurologist did not work did not work so then i proceeded to take like six excedrin migraine and they are basically just caffeine pills oh yeah so i was shot out of a fucking cannon on saturday morning i was ready to go so that was friday was like a wash then saturday i was like buzzing ready to go i went to the mall because i had to do some returns and i don't know if this is something that you guys do but when i make a return i then think it's free money that I can go spend. Yeah. And it's not a great character trait that I have.

I'm fully aware of it, but it's something that I do. So made my returns, then took my free money and spent more money. And then I also had a haircut appointment, but I also have crippling anxiety. So I am chronically early for everything. So naturally I had an hour to spare and my haircut is only like five minutes from the mall. So I did what any normal person would do when I went to the Wendy's in the food court. What'd you get? Did you go four for four?

Did you go four for four? I got six spicy chicken nuggets, hot and crispy fries, a chocolate frosty, and I ate them in my car in the mall parking lot and it was nirvana. What dipping sauce did you get? Honey mustard.

Okay, good. Always. Ask Claire about that next week on your pod. I will say, few things hit harder than eating fast food just in a parking lot. 1,000%. It's one of my favorite pastimes. I didn't even do the like oh let me move my car to like the back no i stayed right in the parking lot people were like coming for my spot i'm like

no i'm not leaving it's fine just keep driving this is parked in the drive-thru lane just like waiting by the window to eat her food denise denise goes actually pulls her car into a handicapped parking spot just to eat her food and then stares at people i mean that's the only way to do it so that then i got my haircut that was saturday then sunday had brunch my friend came in from brooklyn and i had a bloody mary and a burger which i know has been discussed on the podcast it's a top 10 meal it is so good yeah for brunch and a burger i had a weird combo to me why no i don't know like tomato juice and like i i mean i maybe i'm just hung up on bloody mary like tomato juice and anything to me is like it

was a 130 brunch so it was like lunch or breakfast you could have gone i went lunch route could have gone dessert could have gone dessert some some say should have i know you always gotta go dessert and then did a little bar hopping and then had off yesterday thanks to uh mlk we had no school so recorded this week's episode of no one knows anything if you want to listen it's going to be dropping tomorrow taylor basaki from cron 4 news in no shout out san francisco is going to be on the podcast so look out for that and now i'm here so if i had to rate my week i would give it you have to um 10 french fries dipped in a chocolate frosty. That's a good week. That's more than $0.

That's a much better than $0. The returns, you're just playing with house money, Denise. Don't feel bad about it. True. Exactly. The thing is, you've already spent the money before, so you already budgeted it out. It's like, oh, this isn't real.

I'm there with you. My problem is I always spend more than I'm getting in return but that's fine well okay so now you're just now you're just now you're just being smart you're getting discounted items now you know it's it's just smart you know i mean i feel validated let's get off shopping it was it was um let's go shopping um no it was uh it was a good time didn't do too much i had a supposed to take this fucking license test on monday so your boy was studying up a storm trying to be a good student and man it didn't fucking pay off shout out technical difficulties didn't take my exam um but so friday i just studied i was just kind of vibing and then saturday saturday last second you know two two two of my good friends invited me out we went to this uh we went to this little cocktail bar i felt like an adult because like we showed up to this bar like we're all sober and we're just

like we're grabbing a few cocktails we're just hanging out like i was like this is kind of cool you know i kind of vibe with this right now um and then we were like so there's this uh deli that has a speakeasy in it and i just we had we had thrown down a few cocktails and i was like you guys it's like one block away like let's just check this out like what the fuck else are we doing tonight and they were like yeah and i was like oh wait oh we're gonna do this like yeah so we go over first off shout out capos oh my god such good food but we go in go to speakeasy the speakeasy is like a super nice little bar like it's so it felt classy as fuck i was wearing like this uh like flannel hoodie i have and i have like a hat on i was like oh my god i'm underdressed right now i look like a fucking clown everyone

in there was like dressed fairly nice like it was like a nice little spot rip some tequila shots delicioso um and then had a few drinks in there being in a bar that smells like cheesesteak is super underrated it was such a good time oh my god i was just like and then when we before as you're getting ready to leave i was like you guys if you don't think i'm gonna stop and get a cheesesteak on the way out after the hour and a half of advertising that i've had going on right now like you're out of your fucking mind like i'm absolutely smashing a cheesesteak so we were at the speakeasy we were at the speakeasy for like hour hour and a half ish and then it started it just started getting way too fucking crowded and since it's a speakeasy and

it's smaller it was just like oh my god we need to get the fuck out of here but um then just went hi onto my friend's place for a little and then just called it a night it was very good oh my god the cheesesteak schlatt it was so good um and then sunday was just studying in football all day um yesterday was watching the arizona cardinals yo big time shout out um thanks for disappointing me guys you really just you walked into the stadium and you said hey i'm gonna bend over for you los angeles this is my asshole please just do whatever you want with it um and man graphic la did la did whatever they wanted with the arizona cardinals assholes and thanks guys i appreciate you ending my football year on that note. Um, that being said,

it was a decent weekend. I will give it, um, I will give it one post-bar cheesesteak. Nice. I feel like I pretty good. It was pretty solid. You a cheesecake,

not cheesecake, cheesesteak center scented candle. I can't speak. I'm having a stroke. It's too late. Okay. How's my week how was your weekend how was your weekend stroke guy um new year's is in a full swing because the gym is packed i hate it i just can't do anything

anymore it's people are everywhere people give up on your goals go home gain some weight leave it to the rest of us please i just i want space again uh after that though the dude that i sold my tv to on craigslist last week texted me he was like hey man i need to i need to return this and i was one i'm not responding to that two you don't get free returns off craigslist what do you what do you think this is he's like yeah hold on maybe he was trying to go shopping for the rest of the money back with the money twice that he did not give you like not gonna risk he emailed me back too he's like hey man what's your phone number after he texted me that guy's weird also he's supposed to be in

tanzania by now so like i don't know what happened to his flight but the boy's lying to me but so that was weird um i booked my third airbnb for traveling this year so i got my new york city place booked denise everywhere you suggested it's very expensive so couldn't go there but no i replace i know it's it's fine my brother gave me like suggestions in the area and he's like everywhere he like picked was like the most expensive part of new york i was like all right well obviously those are the cool parts but like i can't live there harlem i mean where is this airbnb it'll be fun i told my mom that if my mom went brian okay there's my mom and my dad in the background was like amy it's not the 1960s and she's like yeah mom when was the last time you're

in new york city she's like yeah it's been a couple years it's like thanks. And she's like, yeah. I was like, Mom, when was the last time you were in New York City? She's like, yeah, it's been a couple years. I was like, thank you. And then she's like, well, so where's even Harlem even at? I was like, so you don't know anything about New York City, but you heard the word Harlem, and you're going to have a stroke. Check yourself. We're talking about the Globetrotters, right? Yes.

Yeah, the home of the Globetrotters. But no. So that's dope, though. Making some plans. This weekend, though, though went bowling my one friend lauren's moving away so we're having like going away stuff constantly for him ran into one dan at the bowling alley uh i didn't notice him cory and lauren's like is that your friend that you know that cory's friends with also i was like huh and he like walked by and i was like just stared

at him as long as i could before he noticed me he's like hey man it's like where's cory at he's like oh yeah he's with claire at home i was like ah i was like i just expect to see you with cory every single time i've ran into cory and dan like out and about more than i should just like randomly so yep uh bad story about dan though one found out does not like kesha they're playing music and it was like hits on hits on hits it was like kesha and like pitbull back to back then fly like a g6 came on he texted me he's like man someone give me the aux cord this music sucks i was like i looked over i'm like he's like i better be on the podcast this week i was like you'll be in the podcast this week because you taste music horrible so dan i hate you i love you but like your taste in music yeah also jill said the same thing so like i don't know what i don't know what they're doing if

if you have a problem with fly like a g6 i will give you my fucking address and we can fucking hash this out incredible song are you serious that's always a certified banger was the big hole guys will come after you yeah dan and jill well and i hope they do um but yeah so my rating for the week though uh is a thousand people protesting for justice for kesha's music because we need justice all right so game show time it Jeff, are you ready? It's time! I'm ready. Are you going to welcome our contestants, Jeff? Yes.

All right, everybody. Welcome to Are the Boys of It's Wednesday, My Dudes. Smarter than a fifth grader. I'm going to tell you right now, they probably aren't,'t but we're gonna give them a shot we have korean beef yeah yeah we have cory hello we have bry guy all right boys there's gonna be five categories we're gonna go grades one through five classic grade school in each grade you're going to have math a math question a history question an english question a science question and a geography question it's gonna be a lot we might have to fly through just as quick i was just like i don't like it

we're so fucked just get i just want to get a quick little pulse uh rooks what are you what are you most concerned for what do you think think you're going to get the most right? So as a mathematics major, I'm praying to God that I do okay in the math section. Everything else, wild card. Everything else, who fucking knows, probably going to be dog shit. Yeah. I will say, just as a disclaimer, when I was looking for questions for this, the fifth grade math was hard, but I was also in remedial math in high school. So I'm not surprised.

So I'm hoping, though, as someone who has extensive math background, that you'll be able to answer these. It's going to be terrible. Yeah. Corey, how are you feeling? Nervous about all of it. So I would say most nervous about English. But then, like, I already know I'm an idiot when it comes to speaking. So, like, that's about english but then like i already know i'm an idiot when it comes to speaking so like that's just gonna confirm what i already know so i'd

i'd also put math up there because i think i know math but if i come out of this being like getting all of them wrong i'm gonna have to reevaluate some things in my life yeah you're right the confidence is sky high boys brian yeah uh so how you feeling uh i my only see thanks bob so my only c in elementary school was in english in fourth grade uh so shout out miss gilhole i did not like you uh so i'm worried about that if you ask me like a conjunction is no clue but also i'm really notoriously bad at counting i'm pretty good at math but i can't count so like kinder he can't count for shit in first grade i'm a witness burn cannot count to save his life i'll crush it but early on you can be rough out the gate

me and burn when we used to work out burn would do like we'd be bench pressing and burn would we'd be doing five reps we'd do five sets of five reps burn have a set where he'd do like eight he'd be like at eight and he'd be getting ready for another one i'd be like dude what the fuck and i'd like racket he's like what it was like does you better do your ninth rep man what the fuck are you doing yeah numbers are hard i have that same problem i can't like conceptualize like if someone's like oh how many people were at the party it could have been five it could have been 500 i have no idea like i just i don't have a concept of like how many things are five and 500 that's a there's a big i mean not maybe you know what i'm trying to say all right we're getting started grade one fuck okay first question oh and people can play at

home right the people can play at home send in your scores call us call uh call in and let us know what your uh yeah send in your scores that's a good one and we all know you guys are absolutely gonna lie yeah i mean i would lie i might lie here i'm just gonna somehow try to cheat i don't know how but i'll figure it out halfway through okay are you ready no so grade one first question what is 384 rounded off to the nearest tenth all right for the viewers so do we do we show you what we so go ahead so show me what your answer is and you also say it into the microphone for the viewers at home so that's my answer okay my answer is 380 if you can it says i don't know if you can read that brian what do we got cory you're furiously writing 380 good job cory show us your work you cheater cory's still writing dude 380 also for the viewers is it backwards these three

men have the most atrocious handwriting i've ever seen in my life i can type it's bad it's i think across the board it's gonna be miserable oh this is gonna be this is gonna be can you hold on hold on let's fucking go can you please announce what category we're in before because i was i was prepping for english and i got really nervous about it okay so i'm gonna let you guess on that one which category do you think it was math i think that was science right scientifically crap yes so that was math now we're gonna go into history so put your history on do you mean social studies because i didn't take history in second grade okay so we're in first grade so i didn't take it in first grade either okay grade one history oh no the statue of liberty was a gift to the united states from what country boom i got it oh he's got it right

guys guess what i wrote oh let's fucking go oh corey you want to share share with class oh i said france paris is a city brian come on man good job rucks you fucking idiot i was thinking of emily and perry and i was like oh this good paris this man wrote paris you dumb bitch i think i know that from i think in national treasure they say there's another one in france right yeah yeah shout out nick cage my man out here shout out harrisburg shout out nick cage shout out biggs oh wow i love those movies i gotta watch those b Brian's taking a sweatshirt off. He's getting hot. And honestly, I'm taking mine off soon.

Burn real fucking Paris and now he's all stressed out. You know the Key and Peele skit where he just has like water pouring down his... I'll tighten up. It's just like a waterfall. All right, let's go. We're number three. What do we got? Now we're moving on to English.

Oh, God. Shit. What type of words should always be capitalized? Is it? What type of words should always be capitalized? All right. I think. I think I have this.

All right. Write down your answers. Proper noun. Rooks. Let's go. Proper noun. Cory, no. Rooks, yes.

Brian, yes. The correct answer is proper noun. I've been fucking genius, bro. So, like, you would capitalize Corey. You would not capitalize Cookie. Unless it's Cookie from Ned's The Classifier. Let's fucking go. There's your English lesson today.

I would capitalize Cookie. Yeah, I mean. I'm just going to say three for three. Honestly, honestly, I'll take that one as wrong because like I still had the right answer in the right answer. You know, you're the right word. Paris is in France. I mean, Paris. If I'm slightly wrong with all of these.

It's first grade. If people can see how I got there, I'll take it. Yeah. I don't care. Noun to proper noun is the same as- Paris to France. Brian writing Paris for France. Guess who also probably didn't know that in first grade?

This guy. So if I never learned it in first grade, I'm not going to know it now. That's fair. All right. We're moving on to science. Grade one science. We have two more sections. You're almost out of first grade. science we have two more sections you're

almost out of first grade you're almost graduating you're growing up so fast okay what is the largest internal organ in the human body it's not your penis right shit my wiener oh no i got this no i got this i got this i know what this is rooks is coming in confident He's looking like a front runner boys Go ahead I'm not looking What does that say Rooks? Skin? The question was internal Oh fuck

I thought that was like Isn't that like a trick question? No I literally said The largest organ The largest actual organ is the skin, though, right? Is the skin, yes. That's what I was thinking. Come on, put your listening ears on.

Corey. Bro. Corey, you put the small intestine. You know what else exists? A large intestine. But that could be girth-wise. Why would you pick the smaller one? The small one is longer.

Because isn't one, like, isn't one longer? Yeah, it's the long intestine. The smaller one is longer. Isn't one longer? Yes, the long and the large intestine. The smaller one's the large intestine. Brian, do you see what I'm saying? Wider, I think. Also, small intestine is longer.

This is the best. Large intestine is talking about the thickness. What are we talking about? the the thickness like yeah like what are you talking about blood vessels no you're all three wrong what is it the liver oh that's stupid what if you had surgery it was what's the largest internal organ the largest are you gonna fact check jeff go worthy i might for the viewers we keep referring to her as jeff go worthy because her phone auto-corrected jeff foxworthy who hosts are you smarter than a fifth grader jeff go worthy and it just it just looked it hit so different when

she posted it all right jeff that just made me so mad i'm taking i need to take my sweatshirt off that made me so mad because brian you understand the thought process of the small intestine being large. Do you want to wait? Wait until the next question before we move on to grade two. In between the grades. I'm already done with the first grade. All right. Grade one, geography.

Exactly. How many continents are there? This one should be easy. Don't say it. Oh, I think I got it. Seven. What's the answer? Corey? Seven. guys three for three we made a comeback on that one i i know that's wrong i just was answering quick because it was the first question and i was like

wow i know it i'm so surprised at myself but uh so after first grade the standings are cory has three brian has three rooks has four i'm pretty proud of us fucking go bitch beef is in the lead oh also googled it yeah so the small intestines narrower but it is longer than the largest yes thank you make me feel bad, but I should feel bad. It sounded hilarious. It sounded so fucking dumb. And now, listening back, I'm going to sound really fucking dumb, but it's still hilarious to me. I don't care.

It's all in the semantics. It's fine. Okay, ready? Grade two. Shit. Math. Guys, who was, everybody, who was your second grade teacher? Mine was Mrs. Wolf.

Miss Davis. Shout out 9-11. Miss Amick, I think. When we were in second grade teacher mine was mrs wolf miss davis shout out 9-11 miss amic i think when we were in second grade yeah mine was miss corona which is funny did you just did you just shout out 9-11 yeah yeah we're just gonna gloss over the fat never forget christ start second grade jesus we shot out technical difficulties earlier too and you know what shout out to technical difficulty and we and you shouted out strokes we didn't shout that out for just said he had a stroke well shout out okay now we're doing it we go way back family history baby all right we're in second grade these nuts sorry sorry we're in second grade sorry what is the roman numeral xvi crap

i got it yep got it i got yeah 16 across the board 16 three for three good job guys boys i love roman numerals If you don't put that on a t-shirt I don't know why I've always I don't know I think it's really satisfying Like understanding Roman numerals I don't know

More of an Arabic numeral kind of guy But it's just me Are you ready for Shout out numbers History Yeah Second grade history No

Fuck I will be shocked if any of you get this Actually You might Geneva Convention Italy Are you ready for history? Yeah. Second grade history. Fuck. I will be shocked if any of you get this. Actually, you might. Geneva Convention. Italy, Japan, and Germany's alliance was called what during World War II? Wow. Easy.

Stay in school, Denise. The Axis powers? Come on. Three for three. Hold that L, boy. I play Call of Duty. I would not have known that. The answer was, well, yeah.

Dog. Call of Duty or not? In Call of Duty, like World War II, you're always on Axis or the Allies. Oh. All right, well, I stand corrected. Shout out to Axis powers. Get body bagged, Denise. Sorry.

Ratio? Shout out to Axis. I'm not going to be able to make it through this podcast I swear to god alright third question grade two we're going into English yes is red red

an adjective or a noun oh what do we think shit um Adjective or a noun? Oh. What do we think? Shit. Hold on. I'm going adjective, but it doesn't feel right at all. I'm going adjective as well.

You are all three wrong. It was a trick question. It's both. The color. Idiots. How the fuck? That's not an option. So. Because red is a color and something can be red uh is it a

proper noun rules okay i didn't i didn't know that there were trick questions and are you the answer was a c that's true it is my show that's not how tests work well great if you turned your scantron over on the back there's actually a third bubble you could have filled in should have looked at i didn't know there were two questions it's fine no we are not shouting out scantrons fuck those things i love those do you remember oh what was um confessions of a teenage drama queen i think that was the movie did you guys watch that where there was like the really mean girl and she did all the... I don't think that's the right movie.

Someone fact check me. Look. We played Call of Duty. She did the Scantrons and she wrote something. This is a really bad callback. We're just going to move on to the next question. Okay, we're moving on to science. There you go.

Jeff, go with it. Go with it. Okay, we're moving on to science. Second grade. It it. Go for it. Okay. We're moving on to science. Second grade. It's a true or false. Are we sure? Oh, okay.

Or is it something else? Is there another option outside of true or false? No, it is either true or false. Okay. False. Bats are mammals. Do they have nipples? Jesus.

Can you milk me, Greg? I don't know if they have nipples. I'm i don't can you milk me greg i don't know if they had nipples going yes wait true true for cory true for brian false and the answer is true yeah they are mammals you want to know how i based that one uh i know batman's a mammal and so i went with it well because batman has nipples good call cory there you go it's true okay we can shout out nipples i'm cool with that one we'll shout out nipples that's for sure wow what a ride if you're playing along with us take a drink if you have nipples shout out nipples take a sip for every nipple you have oh god okay we're moving on to geography second grade still what is another name for a group of islands do i have to spell it right um no i'll take phonetic spelling shit i i genuinely don't know this i don't know it but i have a funny answer it's a murder of

islands can you read this no but i like the creativity. Like, what does that say? Something like that. Apple. That's the Appalachia. Appalachia. Applegate? What the fuck is that? Appellate. Okay. I said Island Boys.

I have no fucking idea. I have no clue. Ryan was the closest. It's an archipelago. Yeah, that's what I'm trying to say. No, but you said fucking Applegate. I said Applegate. That's wrong.

A-P-P-E-L-A-G-I-O. He said the Bellagio like in Vegas. That's what he wrote. That's what it was closer to. This is what I was trying to say. You said you take phonetics. Yeah, it's a Bellagio of islands. I don't think I've ever actually said that word.

I'll take it. Yeah, please give me that point. I do want to take murder and island boys though because phenomenal answers. A murder of islands. There's a murder of islands over there okay we're moving up we're moving we're moving through we're moving on well that was great i i got to correct that grade so it's only gonna get better after second grade cory has six ryan has seven and rooks has five rook. Rooks, you've fallen. How the mighty have fallen.

That's Cap. No, that's Cap. I have six. I had six for Rooks. I got four the first round. I got four that round and two this round. Stop trying to cheat me. I told you I was in remedial math in high school.

Leave me alone. She can't count. Are the points worth more as you go up or all the same? I assume all the same. All the same. That was a good question. What I learned in school, no question is a bad question. So thanks, Dennis.

Okay. I learned not to pick my nose in public. Are you ready for grade three? Yes. Shout out, Ms. Kowar. What? Shout out, Mrs. Morgan. Shout out, Ms. Kowar.

That's where me and Bright Guy met each other. We traced Goku drawings in the back of class together. I hope you guys go 0 for 5. I hope they do. shout out mrs morgan shout out miss guar that's where me and brag i met each other we uh we traced uh man i hope you guys go over five i hope they do too i hope you have to i hope we what i don't go for five like if you guys both just can't answer any of these it's gonna say a lot about what was great i don't know if she taught us a lot, though. Bro, I got fucking two in second grade, man. I'm fucked. Yeah, this is rough. Okay. Grade three math.

Long division. A quotient is the answer to what kind of problem? Yeah. Division. Does that make any sense at all? Corey says division. Rook at all? Corey says division. Rook says division. Brian says division. Good job, guys.

I almost fucked up. I almost put multiplication. Multiplication's a product, right? Yeah. Man. Math major. I just felt the terror flowing through my spine there. Yeah, that was stressful. I started writing multiplication. I was like, I cannot fuck this out. I haven't heard quotient since the third grade that's a fact how do you feel about american history because that that comes in in third grade i you know what's weird i always liked like history and also i feel

like a lot of people don't know it so i don't feel bad if i don't know it you know yeah i know so like history fucking bring it all right jeff go worthy why are you coming to denise like she's fucking talking shit to you i don't know i'm getting excited okay what are the first 10 amendments of the constitution call come on okay oh shit i thought you should be like what are the first 10 amendments fuck um don't share your answer yet cory so he doesn't he wasn't looking he wasn't looking okay wait no that's definitely not right but fuck it brian let's see your answer i thought cory said bill of rights bill of rights yep fuck what did you say brooks you know what rooks that's a really good answer though for not knowing that's a good answer

i'll take it i've heard about history class bro you need to watch national better answer but that's the second she i heard she would have taken island boys for the first if i in my head i was like if i don't get this right if i don't like know an answer i'm just gonna put the miranda rights they're just gonna fucking throw that shit in there fuck it oh my goodness okay we're moving on to english this is a little bit of a longer one so put your listening ears on um are there two answers to this one no okay just wanted to be clear. English has been weird. No, this is straightforward. Adding conjunctions such as and or but turns a simple sentence into what type of sentence? A stupid sentence.

The puzzled looks on your faces are worth a million dollars. Okay, Brian has his answer locked in oh i said structured structured i don't know baby i said complex i don't know complex brian said compound which is the correct answer and cory what did you write structured are we building a house standard no he's over structured structured and i stand out for. I've been doing it in the house for a while, so. I can't read. Brian gets the point. There's structured sentences. Aren't there structured sentences? Isn't that a thing? Or is it just learning the structure of a sentence?

You know, I would just like to say that. And guess who never did that? This guy. Look, I'm super proud to be the smartest first grader here. So fuck you guys, and fuck this stupid game. The smartest five-year-old. Maybe you just skip a grade. You might have, like, first and fourth grade on lock,

and you're just, second, third, it's just not your mood oh we're out here struggling man i'm fighting for my fucking life i'm gonna play this game i'm i'm gonna listen to this podcast with claire in the car and pause it after everyone and just see what she knows some of these are tough i didn't know all of these and i felt really dumb looking through for some questions. I did not know all of them. Hey, spoiler. I feel pretty dumb right now, so there you go. I haven't felt this dumb in a while, I'll be honest. You know what?

Sometimes you got to be humbled. That's all. All right, Jeff. Sit down. All right. We're moving on to science. In what state of matter, gas, liquid, solid solid are molecules packed the tightest this is a little bit of a gimme boys um there's four states of matter actually plasma is also one of them

so jeff you can go suck it well we're sticking to the the original three solid solid solid before what's what's uh there's a it's a trio what is it a quartet what's a what's what's uh? There's it. It's a trio. What is it a quartet? What's a what's for? quadruple quad Foursome murder I was I was thinking like an act like a musical act you have like a trio Yeah, yeah, does that mean there's four yeah there you go Yes, yeah, I don't know where you're going i'm not sure i understand the question i was saying it was it was a stupid joke just move on okay we're moving on to geography last question grade three

what is the longest river in the world these notes um oh shit this is right i don't know if this is right but i like my answer is it the is it the amazon and brian locked in amazon which is the correct answer fuck it's out of the mississippi come on the dial is like tiny all right buddy relax over there genius fucking jimmy neutron fucking big ass head big ass brain elementary school fucking brain blast head ass fuck you man are you sure you guys were in the same third grade class rooks because it's looking pretty bad for you on that route shut up jeff go worthy someone shoot off of somebody so after third grade, Corey has nine, Brian has 12, and Rooks has eight. I would just like to say, after fourth grade, if we didn't want to read the grades and standings, I'd be totally cool with that.

Just putting it out there. We'll just do a grand reveal at the end. Yeah, that'd be really cool. I just don't need these updates, you know what I'm saying? Okay, I respect that. You we're moving on next time upper elementary you're switching classes now you got your a little bit more responsibility your brains are getting a little bigger we're hitting you god i fucking i got a boner i'm so sorry you said go through puberty i can't help myself i'm sorry okay we're doing fourth grade math yeah please how many wheels will 99 bicycles

oh crap and one tricycle have all together um all right hold on let's get a let's get some clock going hold on yeah hold on hold on the wheels are turning i see it i'll only be accepting the common core math way to show your work. Also known as new math. I want to buzz in. Okay. Corey says 199. Brooks says 200.

And what is that? I got it wrong. I'm just going to tell you that right now. And Brian? I did 99 times 99. Oh, I got it wrong. That's not the right answer. What's your answer, Brian?

9,800. Nope, the answer is 201. Let's fucking go rooks is putting that penn state math degree to work literally you said you said and one and one bicycle at the end one bicycle oh that's see that's where my math went went lost we lost the trike do you have a unicycle yeah because i i did the math for all the bicycles and then i was like what'd she say and then i put i just added one because you know i'm sure she said unicycle but what would you have gotten it right if i had said a big wheel that's true don't they sometimes always have three they did most of the time some would argue all the time

yeah probably would have gotten it right if i said big wheel sorry about that wish you did all right moving on to history let's go the battle of gettysburg was fought during which war yeah i think right cory says civil to the yeah brian says civil civil rook says civil good job boys not so civil war three for three me and rooks uh went to a lot of like civil war monuments and like boy scouts dude that shit was always scary dude we sleep in the tens and they were like oh yeah like you might hear some stuff at night dude i heard footsteps i heard like ghost a ramling not actually like but like i heard noises and shit it was scary as fuck yeah i would not want to do that yeah it was gettysburg and the other freakiest one was antietam was that was that the bloodiest battle antietam was fucking freaky at night time oh my

god i did not fuck with that shit yeah we slept in a tent naked for fun not for fun dude i was trying to get my weeblos badges or whatever the fuck those things are called i don't know popcorn in the graveyard boy scouts just don't only sell popcorn yeah they pretty much just like girls i learned how to tie a square side here they corner you out of uh home depotowe's specifically. And I hate it. Popcorn shit. Okay. Moving on to English. Hey, apparently, big no shout out to the Boy Scouts.

Fuck those guys. Yeah. An anti-shout out to the Boy Scouts. Whisper out. Big anti-Boy Scout podcast. Okay. Find the preposition in this sentence. No. find the preposition in this sentence no the playful golden retriever puppy

sat on the kitchen table got it one of those words is a preposition do you guys need a timer cory would you like me to say it again yeah i'm gonna repeat that one more time the playful golden retriever puppy sat on the kitchen table all right brooks says on brian says on and i i didn't i didn't cory's writing his answer i don't i'm not even i don't have an answer yeah because i was listening i didn't mute my headphones for that one. Sorry, guys. That's un-go-worthy. I will say, because it's an honest podcast, would have not gotten that. You know what?

And you know what? Good on you for coming up and saying... I'm not going to pretend like I know words. Honesty is the best policy. Do we get it? Yeah, you got it. Fourth grade is my shit! I don't think I've gotten one English one not gonna lie it was 100 one of these things is not like the other like i was like which one of these do i not know like what i would refer to it as and i was

like oh oh no fucking like what is that that's uh what i don't even remember what you called it that came up for grade four but like i work on that with like my preschooler so i'm concerned i would have been concerned. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It was grade four material, okay? Don't sell us short now. What do you mean you would be concerned? You should be concerned.

I didn't get it. I didn't get it. I panicked. I'm having an existential crisis over here. Embrace it. Okay, we're moving on to science. Yay. Fourth grade science.

Name the three steps of the water cycle. There's three of them. And I want them in order. Two stomps left, three stomps right. Charlie Brown? Yep. In order? You're not going to get the next one either.

It's going to be funny. Yes, in order. Wait. All right, I'll put a timer on because this is going take me a minute what am i rooks don't say it out loud don't say i can't read that i'll say i'll say it out loud once they have their answers three steps of the water it's not right i'll tell you that right now it didn't look right so it's not right i'll tell you that There's three steps to the water cycle. Miners. Mine's still not right.

I just thought of the first three words that came to my mind for water. Miner. Agua. Evaporation, precipitation, condensation? Mine's. Evaporation, what did you say? Oh, man. Oh, shit. Precipitation would have been smart well it's evaporation condensation precipitation but yes man evaporation

you're right you're right the order is wrong i put photosynthesis down i was thinking plants oh god no but this is okay but we haven't read my answer yet but i got evaporation and condensation and i want it on record i was thinking condensation was so wrong it wasn't even funny so that's where my head's at do I have to read my answer yeah you have to it's the rule my answer is cloud rain body of water

you just ruined the things it comes out of I don't know man I was like oh it's in the clouds and then it goes down and turns into rain and then it fills up bodies of water you're right but you're also wrong so brian's the only one who's not offering let's go my mom talks about the weather pretty much every day this man said photosynthesis yo i still got two out of the three right like why are you attacking me rooks got zero no attack

cory cory's answer was so dumb wait brooks when you said that it reminds me of like like caveman answer cloud cloud body of water rain like grunting oh god that was so bad how many more goddamn classes do we have left in this school you have one more in fourth grade then you're up on to fifth shockingly i'm not sure how we made it you know it's hilarious what is right above like my monitors is my framed diploma from penn state as if i deserve it yeah smacking you in the face it's like just looking at me and i don't like it you stupid bitch like just looking down on you what an idiot okay we're on to geography grade four how many kingdoms are part of the united kingdom oh shit wait did this change recently hold on hold on i don't know

i'll just do this i'm gonna i need to draw that's right map you know what go with your gut i don't think i'm pretty sure i'm gonna draw a map i don't even know where i would start to draw a map to be honest with you okay locked in his answer right there's one there's one i don't think mine's enough my answer is five probably brian said five oh wait is rook said four cory said three it's one of you is right man is oh it's me let's fucking go yep wales scotland ireland england yes wow rooks i didn't even i know soccer baby let's go there you go hold on a little footy i'm fact checking this i only know the states in the u.s you can't only know the states in the u.s because america i read this like recently and there's one more. No. What would the fifth one be? I'm a sore loser, Brian.

It's like some island that's just a tiny, tiny island. Island boys. The Republic of my butt. Archipelago boys. Archipelagio boys. Archipelagio. With the fountains behind them. Yo, let's go. Okay, fourth fourth grade turn it around a little bit i'm so last it's not even funny yes i want the score i want the scores now now i want them

sure yeah cory has 10 i'm in the basement ryan has 15 rooks has 12 so rooks if you could make a comeback in fifth grade happy with 10 you're still in the game cory unfortunately you are out of the game hey was i ever in the game though for you know when we started everyone was in that's true and then you just found yourself you found your way i'd like to say i had a good time okay brian are you done fact checking the go worthy the isle of man is not part of the uk i was wrong but the united kingdom is responsible for the defense of that island so like i'd say that's part of it nope it stands for you gotta go with the go gotta go with the go-worthy. Go with the go-worthy. Put it on a t-shirt.

Okay. We're moving on to fifth grade math. You guys are about to graduate. You're about to go to middle school. How does it feel? I might be dropping out. You might be. You might be repeating fifth grade. We're going into math class. Period one. You ready ready name the three types

of triangles got it threw a little geometry in there oh god i can't spell this which i never took in high school because i had to take uh remed math again. I have my answers. Mr. Jeff, is this correct? You got to hold it up a little bit higher. Oh, I can't spell this. Isosceles. This might be wrong. Brooks says the same three. Okay.

Brooks has his answers in i crossed two out i said isosceles and right obtuse is an angle that was so close i know i know i was thinking obtuse and acute yeah so you all had pieces of it the correct answer is equilateral isosceles and you all missed scalene oh i i don't know why i thought right was an answer oh cory did cross out go with your gut cory go with the gut go with the go worthy i didn't even pass fourth grade you think i'm gonna go with my gut in fifth grade you're wrong yeah that's true it was close between all three of you you got the right answer hey and you know what we make up one mind do we have any uh sex

ed questions in fifth grade because we had sex in fifth grade we do not i can do uh oh that's gonna have to be a whole separate episode of just like sex ed questions and zach has to be on it because he's gonna go like oh we're gonna do it's wednesday my dude does high school health oh love it oh god honestly i learned more in health class in fifth grade than i did in go worthy for sure will be present for that one because i will not be missing out on that as an audience member or as the host i don't know either or we're definitely gonna need a mediator for that yes that's gonna go off the rails you'll be the phone a friend this might be the beginning and the end of my test taking appearances on the podcast so next week we're

taking the sat okay we're moving on to history grade five history What was the first colony in the United States? And I'm going to emphasize colony. Colony of ants. Okay, Rooks has his answer in. He's locked it in. That was quick, too, Rooks. I got it? Oh. Let's fucking go, dude!

It is the correct answer. That one. Maybe? Or is that the first state nope what did you wear i put delaware cory wrote rhode island i tried to help you out by emphasizing colony rooks tell them the answer jamestown bitches jamestown settlement in virginia that was a colony not state it's it's right by it's like it's part of the the historic triangle is james williamsburg and i think something else so like whenever i whenever i visit my family in williamsburg i see the sign that says jamestown hold my fucking balls can you get this to do scores real quick okay we'll move it right into english on that note all right who is the author no of to kill a mockingbird come on guys shit act like i've read that book no hold on you didn't read that in in school

no no this isn't right when i say this you're all going to kick yourselves this isn't right ask me when the oh yeah this isn't right okay bird wrote jk rowling and while she is a good author she did not write this one no no no no shout out to jk rowling uh she doesn't like trans i don't think this is right she sucks f scott fitzgerald no that is um gatsby gatsby fuck harper lee do i is this right i'm gonna give do we give me points it's something like e lee harper lee right something wrote lee and his name is harper lee harper lee okay and because he has no chance in winning we're gonna give him the point there yeah come on bitches fuck yeah hey you know what i'll take sympathy points all day baby a quick little aside what was your favorite book that you guys read when you were in

school captain underpants easy come on don't even well like okay like class school assigned that way he's got a sign captain under did you have the scholastic book fair every fucking kid was reading that book it may not have been a sign but because everybody went to the book fair everybody read it like sorry i like to have fun reading books outside class i never bought books i only wrote i only bought scented erasers and highlighters that's why you're in remedial math trying to get high on your own supply sniffing things and kristin and i used to sit at recess and trade scented scented erasers we usedasers. We bought little carrying pouches for them and we would trade them. Manion.

Big shout out, Kristen. Damn it. Another female in the field. Yep. You had no friends. Rooks, what was your favorite book? Are we doing like actually like assigned books or like just whatever I've read? Yeah.

Yeah. Like assigned books? Assigned books. Through school. When I was a senior ap lit we read uh the stranger which is a really good book it's very like dark but it's like it's all about uh yeah i'm just trying to flex um it's just all about like living life the way you fucking want to bro get that shit in heaven oh my i remember liking five people in heaven i don't couldn't

tell you what it was all about but i remember liking that we read um alice in wonderland and i had this bat shit crazy teacher junior year of high school again kristen was in my class and everyone got a different part and you had to read your part we like popcorn read in the voice and if you didn't he would literally kick you out of the classroom and then you would have to like kicked out so fast you have there was some secret passcode to get back in i swear to god he was the sounds like an easy way to get out of class mr c but i feel like that's i think that's just inviting you to sound ridiculous though like if someone would have asked me that do you know the performance i would have fucking put on to read those lines like as a high schooler especially like that's just it's just asking for like it was wild debauchery

it was really wild i hate that class he should have been fired the thing that we could do a whole episode on that man we'll put it on the list oh i got high school i got high school teacher stories yeah it's crazy we can do that on no one knows anything perfect no one knows anything about teaching high school okay we're moving on to science. We only got two questions left, boys. You're doing a great job. And I got the lead? Feels like an eternity. Brian is in the lead.

Rooks is on your tail. He's only two behind. I'm two behind, so I have to hit these both, and he has to miss both for me to tie? Yes. Okay. What part of an atom has a negative electrical charge? Oh, yeah.

Good luck, Rooks. He's thinking. His wheels are turning. Corey's looking flushed. I'm so fucked. Corey's answer is in. Corey's answer is in. Mine seems too easy.

Ryan's answer is in. Is in. Seems too easy to be true. They're all named after their charge. Rooks also went with electron, job guys let's fucking go oh i still lost but like fuck it i hate this this has made me revisit like why i hated school which is i just second guess everything i think of even if i know it's right and i hate it the three things in adam though are uh proton neutron electron proton neutron yeah it starts with the p neutrons neutral starts with the n it sounds way too easy so that's why i'm like like i just think i'm gonna always get them wrong and that's how like i learned to like

zero confidence never will yeah you forgot the jimmy on my answers just gonna use the like all right okay we're ready the final question let's wrap it up worth five points get me out of here once recess answer this question okay geography the mountain range that includes mount everest is called the blank. No clue. All right. We're going to do a timer because all of a sudden we're going to sit here with nothing. I got an answer I'm going to show. I don't know. I don't think this is right.

I said the same as Corey. Corey's answer is in. They both responded with, we're waiting for Brian.'s answer is in they've both responded with we're waiting for brian my answer is in i said the tall ones the tall tall ones the tall ones is what good answer good answer good answer cory and rooks both said the himalayas which is correct let's fucking go good job boys oh dude second and third grade just fucking gave me the los angeles rams to arizona cardinals treatment man god damn it so at the end of elementary school the boyos are going to middle school with these rankings top of the class oh god cory 13 points. Third place. Rooks, 15 points. Second place.

Ryan, 16 points. Third place. Top of the podium. You beat me by one. Thank you, Jeff. I appreciate it. Some bullshit. He got you.

I just like that I was close enough that I don't feel bad about myself. And that's, I win. It was a close race. You guys did better than I thought you would. And that's all. I think you picked some easy ones. worthy your girl jeff go worthy your girl your girl jeff go worthy baby jeff thank you so much for house thank you so much for hosting that was fantastic this was fun we're gonna need your mustache again another time soon always i might take the day off tomorrow and reevaluate my life.

Crack a book. Yeah. Crack a textbook. Are you smarter than an 11th grader? And we just all get zero points throughout the entire thing. No. What? No.

Dude. I literally went two for five in second grade. You want to take me to fucking high school? Are you fucking kidding me? I'm Billy Madison dude Like this ain't fucking happening I just would find it really funny If none of us could figure it out at all

Oh dude We would get demolished But I also feel like At least in like math and stuff Like math and English I feel like there's such a big like change in level between like it's like everyone like in 11th grade everyone's at like different like very different places you know yeah you either have a math science brain or you have an english history brain and that's just facts you gotta play to your strengths that's all i don't really have any

i mean i was the english side definitely not the math side definitely i don't have a science brain i got a math and a pe brain that's that's where all my shit's going i don't think that's a half of the brain but we'll take it cory what's your halves of your brain uh are you kidding me do you know how many buckets i used to get in fucking basketball class bright guy fucking get your weight up so what what's the class that you take in middle school where it's like a hodgepodge of a couple different things thank you um shout out home ec huge shout out because that was my favorite class of all time because all we did was like sew and cook and i was great at both guys i really was i swear to god dude one time in home ec we made blueberry muffins and i was obsessed with them so i went home and i made my mom buy all the stuff

for blueberry muffins and i fucked them up so bad because i put too much i mixed up the sugar and the salt and everyone ate them they were like these are the nastiest muffins i've ever had in my life and i was so offended i was like i followed it so perfectly i brought them into school they were nasty and dude shop class was fun too when you build bridges and catapults that was pretty dope my home ec class we made quesadillas and everyone was just horrible and burnt them all and then we never made food again because we're too bad at it i was like put cheese into a tortilla that's it my home ec class got canceled my year because somebody we

were making cookies somebody had an oven at like 450 and they just took dish towels and just threw them in the oven and so naturally the dish towels lit on fucking fire and then it was this whole big thing and then the next semester home ec wasn't offered again yeah it's probably shout out earl b wood middle school like this is the thing like like what goes through your stupid brain like yeah i'm gonna take this fucking fabric and i'm gonna throw it into a fucking 450 degree oven let's do that like that's not even gonna get laughs like at that age like no one's gonna be like oh you're the kid that threw the fucking towels in the oven you're fucking dope like you're moving you're getting moved up in my myspace top friends like fuck no man everyone's gonna look at you like a fucking weirdo i don't know well do you know the remember you remember who it was who have on the podcast next

week oh i have no fucking clue i have no idea if you've ever thrown a towel into an oven shout out in home mech class in middle school shout out towels and ovens there's a link in the description of every episode call in tell us what went wrong at home at class uh follow us on instagram twitter iwmd underscore pod raise five stars on apple podcast spotify denise plug your podcast again because i know you want to yeah if you want to listen to your girl um every thursday apple and spotify no One Knows Anything. Like Brian said, rate five stars. You can listen, follow noonows underscore pod on the gram.

Yeah. She's going to have a great guest on next week. One biased opinion. Tomorrow we got Taylor from Cron 4 News in San Francisco. And then next week, we have a very special guest, a friend of It's Wednesday, My Dude. So you'll have to listen to see who it is. Some say more than a friend.

Some say more. For all of us. Ooh. Who could it be? All right, Rooks, sing us out. Raw, raw, raw potato. Love you guys. Mwah, mwah, mwah, mwah.