It’s Wednesday My Dudes - Ep. 79: King Chuck and the 9 and 2 Quarter Laudromat

Episode Date: September 14, 2022

ALL HAIL KING CHUCK THE THIRD, SAVIOR OF THE SEVEN KINGDOMS, BRINGER OF PAIN, CHAMPION OF THE RING, AND LEADER OVER ALL THE CHUCKS OF THE WORLD. Stank engine returns to talk Chucks, Pokemon VR, and how to kill as many people as possible in the trolley problem. Rate us 5 stars on Spotify! and leave a review and rate on Apple Podcasts! Links here to follow on social media! and find other places to listen!

And here we go. But no, having your phone delete your contacts every three days would be nuts. I would have like three people on my phone, though. It would be pretty sad, to be honest. Yeah, I think it's actually a good idea for me. The amount of times I'm just like, I randomly get like a friend of a friend's contact at a party. And then I just like i go through and i'm like like steven a i'm like like fuck like who the hell is this or like i do have

some people in here that are like i'm pretty sure cody's in my contacts as like cody cody hubbly but under company dick sporty goods like because when we were interns i was like i don't like you would think because we roomed together i wouldn't put him in like that like i'd remember who he was but i was like i don't know yeah i know steph still has me in her phone and will forever have me in her phone as burn in parentheses tetra because that's where we met freshman year of college and she lost my number because she like had to get a new phone and she asked me for it and then showed me her putting it in as brian parentheses tetra again and just said i will forever be that if it ain't broke but no i i have in my contacts the first person is a dude named aaron with no last name

and no um company either so like who are these people but it would be very sad to go to your contacts and there'd be like 10 numbers. So I don't know. I need to go through and clean some of this out because there's a lot of one name people. We should go through, call every one name person. If they don't pick up, you delete them. If you pick up though, you have to tell them. I don't know what I would say if people picked up.

Also, hold on. I think i have like facebook contacts you know how like it synced up if they somebody had their phone on facebook that's also not helping any of this no i actually when i was really bored like beginning of shutdown i went through my contacts and purged them how many okay that's 500 contacts that's a lot that's too many that's that's 450 too many yeah out of those 500 how many of those are actually invited to your wedding uh probably that's how you should narrow it down that ah you're not wrong. Maybe that's what I'll do. I'm going to do that.

There you go. Got you a half New Year's resolution. So, question. I know you guys are super excited, still reeling from the coronation of our new King Chuck III over in the UK. He's got to oversee the Chuck Royal rumble we got a new chuck on

our hands that we didn't think about king chuck yeah so he's gonna oversee it he's not gonna be a part of it i mean i think he needs to be the vince mcmahon and then you think the final chuck has won but then he like kind of takes off his crown and his music starts playing whatever like it's the queen's national anthem and then he walks down the aisle there it is i think perfect yeah wait no i actually saw some tiktoks though what's the london london bridge want to go down like so i saw a lot of people playing that that's actually a pretty good one for her well that's the name of like the plan they had for when she died is london bridge down london bridge has fallen something like that so then like yeah

so it's fergie incredible though so we have our new vincent man though so i'm pumped about it but uh mike sent us some uh chuck facts so king King Charles one or King Chuck one of England was beheaded by his own people King Chuck to rule during a plague and the Great Fire of London so now we're on King Chuck the third so what tragedy or method of death is king chuck the third going to endure we need to get our death board or deadpool going for king chuck this time because we talked about the queen dying for our deadpool so gotta get this one going too just gotta manifest did we have her on our deadpool this year didn't we did we make this happen we talked about it mike messaged me and said man you guys manifested it so like i i think it might have been us i don't know part of me wants to go like really small

like choking on a grape or something just because like the other things were so absurd and i could see like i mean i don't think he's gonna get beheaded, but who knows? You don't want to do something twice, but it would be pretty sweet. A modern day beheading, it would be everybody's fear of getting stuck in an elevator and then climbing out of the elevator, and the elevator actually going down when you're climbing out. Everybody has that irrational fear. For some reason, I don't think he takes elevators. I don't know why I think that but he also just doesn't take stairs people just care this is a perfect opportunity for you to just start creating a rumor that like it's so small you know how like have you ever seen it's like people just like

randomly lied with something small and then like nobody's gonna check that like how do you even check that so it's just like just start saying that and like i want to see if somebody eventually comes back around like 10 years from now it's like you know they don't actually like take any any elevators or anything like where the fuck did you hear that one i just need to edit the wikipedia to say that and then it will slowly make its way into like the society dude someone for the longest time i went to white oak high school in jackson north carolina everyone knew that young gz went to our high school for one year and it was like the one cool fact we had because it was like in the wikipedia and it was like the only cool thing we could say for our school because we didn't have any other like athletes or famous people

senior year i said that again to one kid because like i don't know it always gets brought up every single year he's like oh yeah like eighth grade i edited the wikipedia to say that so like that's completely false i was like dude there's no awesome way and he showed me the like edit and the date and the time stamp and who did it and it was him so he literally did do that on a much smaller scale than the king chuck not taking the elevators the world but still dude i don't the amount of people i told that young cheesy went to my high school for a year nuts so i like it young cheesy i'm glad you had a chuck thing on the list of things to bring up and i just don't know much about england but like do they do anything

because i don't like are they just figureheads now at this point yeah like can anyone tell like all i know is the the queen had like corgis that's like the one thing i knew and then anything else with uh freaking um harry and the fucking other one william and megan markle not megan markle speaking of the fact or the idea of um telling like a lie that people just go along with i saw something on twitter someone trying to spread the rumor of like one one of the queen dies like all her corgis get executed and like don't get past don't get passed down and it was like in the elevator everyone was like what really it's like there's no way that's actually or it's like Don't get passed down. Don't get put in the elevator. Everyone was like, what, really?

There's no way that's actually true. It's like the fine print in her will about her dogs. And it was something like, oh, she stopped breeding them a while ago because she didn't want any of them to still be alive when she died. But the way you can read it. Have you seen any since she's been dead severe lack of corgis over the uk i haven't personally but like you can interpret it as if she dies you have to kill all the corgis so i saw a meme of like a bunch of corgis and little padawan outfits and then like the queen with a lightsaber incredible though uh my prediction for king chuck the third's death assassination via condom gun think about it you shoot that at their head would that be a would that be a

suicide or would that be an assassination is it an assassination if you kill yourself definitely not the hill was i will jfk himself hold on hold on is that a do you think that would rise suicides or like lower them if you started saying like he assassinated himself like do you think people would think that would be a cooler and like they would it would be on the rise or like i think we should change the term i don't know it's suicides pretty like stigmatized i think assassinating yourself's a lot cooler yeah like go out on top assassinating yourself awareness it's april you get the alliteration

going that's incredible though i didn't think about him just because yeah what's the do you care about brian last week he assassinated himself i would it count as assassinating yourself if you hired someone to kill you like do you have to go that route that's that's just trying to provide jobs for those in need i think okay okay i mean you're trying to help unemployment well i mean because realistically it works in two different ways right so you would hire somebody who well maybe has a job i guess they would have to have a job in murdering or like, I don't know, off the street. Craig's list that. Murdering.

But then if they were to, but if they kill you, then a job also opens up, assuming you're working. And if you're not working, though, then that's one less person who was on a call. So either way. To all of your problems. I mean, it's an idea. We're not saying...

Two rocks, one stone. Yeah. Could you imagine if you assassinated yourself? I'm just imagining JFK driving down the streets of Dallas and thousands of people are waving to him and he just pulls out a gun and just pops himself in the head.

Imagine people's reaction if that happened. It would be so much worse. I just choked on my beer. It just came up my nose. Somebody call an ambulance. But for me, I'm assassinating myself with bud light over here oh sweet jesus all right so he's gonna assassinate himself with the condom gun though because what's the like thing where you like sort of try to choke yourself while you're like

masturbating what's it called oh a tuesday something autoerotic asphyxiation nope nope i don't i don't think it's tuesday what day is it it is wednesday my nipples are hard now number one remove your bra i like nuts this in my butt i'm ready to go off as a sexy thing my dick will go like and flip inside out, and it'll turn into a vagina. And you take me. Hi, boys. And of course, Pennsylvania. You leave the butter in the crack.

Why is my spaghetti fizzy? I want to kiss you on the mouth, baby. God damn, he's so good. Yeah, he calls me big time. Ah, ah, ah. Wow, wow, wow. Booty. Of course, it makes me dookie.

If you just wanted to slurp something and then spit it back out. And then I swallow. I want to die. Raw dog and lower. Kid turkey based on nipples. Welcome back to another episode of It's Wednesday, My Dudes. Episode 78. Boys, haven't lost a step. Great start. You thought I would start saying Wednesday a little bit more often. It's 78 episodes and I still drop tuesday instead of wednesday incredible though uh rooks is out uh busy painting lines of the nfl and uh zach is also out busy applying to be on love island but we got a therapist on the episode this week so i got

three ethics questions if you ever get a business card i'm gonna try to vandalize every single one of them try okay just just do uppercase r or just like a small space in between okay that makes sense he sounds very very convinced uh but yeah so stank engine welcome back i feel like it's like your fifth episode third but thank you uh it's like been a handful of months for sure happy to be be a substitute today uh your first string we called you up for the minors no all right yeah okay fair enough there we go but like always we'll get into ethics later which

will probably devolve into talking about king chuck killing himself again uh but cory it's been like two weeks so uh what's happened oh hold on me get my notes. I was trying to figure out, did I see Michael Bublé? Sorry. Did I see Michael Bublé before? No. Okay. You've not talked about the bubbles. Oh, man.

So I didn't realize that I scheduled Michael Bublé. Well, I didn't schedule it. I got tickets to Michael Bublé on the same day that Penn State's first game was. And I'll tell you what, like, such a better time spent at that concert than I would have had watching the Penn State game. Yeah.

The man was great. It was also, like, he's an entertainer. Like, he's a comedian. It's like a Frank Sinatra type thing where it's like he like plays like you know cracks jokes and shit and he like does a lot like audience members like he was like going up and down like signing shit like

during the concert anyway how many boobs do you sign yeah he didn't sign any boobs but how many lays did he sign? How many lays? Yeah.

He signed boobs, but how many lays? I'm lost. Boob-lay. Boob-lay. Ah, fucking God, boo. Hit the boo. Hit the boo. That's worse than me.

That's worse than me. Oh worse than me oh god but it was it was it was just not obvious and it just when you gotta work that hard for it thank you um am i still am i still first string? Yeah, you might get kicked off. But he was sick. Halfway through, he was like, I appreciate you guys getting this concert because I know a lot of people were expecting it's beginning to look a lot like Chris. It was cracking me up. I told my one buddy, Kevin, that I was going to the concert. He was like, it's because pieces of shit like you are buying tickets in august that he's doing concerts in august why would you do this i was gonna ask would i know a single song by him that's not a christmas song yeah you would um and i can't think of the titles right now although i was just

listening to him but you would definitely uh you would definitely know songs i'm not gonna sit here and sing michael buble i'll let him do that um you could look it up i feel like if i mean you know you want you want claire right yeah okay i i feel like i can't think of a better date activity to score points with someone if you were single than to take them to like a michael buble concert like he was well one he just gives off michael yeah how could you not like i feel like you tommy do you like michael buble tommy i'm just like it's not my don't don't hit reverse no listen it's not my genre of choice but going down the road. Don't hit reverse. No, listen. It's not my genre of choice, but if I hear Michael Buble singing, who has an incredible voice, I'm not going to be like, this guy sucks.

What? No. That's true. I would 100% go to their concert. He has a great voice. I assume his songs are catchy. If he's a professional musician that sells out stadiums

you know him you love him but what was funny about it was like so we the only reason I even saw that he was coming to Pittsburgh was we saw John Mayer back in like the spring and I saw an advertisement like you know he's coming or Michael Boulay's coming here and tickets we're gonna go on sale like a week later

I was like oh Claire like do you want to go to that concert she was like yeah like we listen to him when we cook with figured it would be a good concert to go to as we're like sitting in the seats and I think it's like a second song he like came out to like a whole bunch of fire and shit it was really cool but like it's the second song and I like look over and I like realized how into it i was and i was like i just like i talked to claire i was like it just hit me that i brought you here you didn't bring me here and she was like oh yeah like i knew that beforehand i was like i thought it was like agreed upon we were both like really excited go she's like i was excited but like you definitely were the one that planned all this and like wanted to go i was was like, ah.

But it was great. Big Bubbles fan. Wouldn't have any other way. Did you buy any merch? Love him. Always have loved him. No. But, well, okay. So the one downside is like clearly the age.

Yeah. Like the average age that was going. Yeah. And so what I would do different because we are gonna go again obviously next time he comes in town is i'm getting a seat on the end because like nobody gets up because like they're older so i got up like once in the concert to go get another like beer because like we like to drink sue us and so we had a drink to start and i was like fuck like this concert it was like long and i was like

uh like should i get up do i make them i got up i made them get up i wasn't gonna make them like keep getting up but that was the that was the doubt it was like older crowd like i'm gonna get a seat on the end next time so for those who want to go to a concert now you know what a great display of empathy thinking about the older people that'll be 500 i'm proud of you yeah he gasses me up and just gives me like i see like a venmo request pop up on my phone no i already have your card on vial there it is oh god talk to your insurance company um but yeah so then yeah i'm gonna change all my cards after this um but yeah so then I'm going to change all of my cards after this. But yeah, so then after that went home, saw the Penn State game just to ruin my night quick.

They did win, but it was depressing. I only watched the fourth quarter, which was, again, depressing. And then I kind of just like chilled that next weekend. And then this past weekend or the week, I don't know if it was that weekend. Anyway, we went to a friend's wedding. I'm going long now. So I'll just say they had like three after parties. It was sick.

It was like all in like just Washington, PA. So it's like a small town. So they wanted everything at like one location, like not bouncing around. So they had the reception where they had the ceremony. So it was like one room's the ceremony. Then we moved to like the lobby where the cocktail hour was. Then we moved to the reception where they had the ceremony so it was like one room's the ceremony then we moved to like the lobby where the cocktail hour was then we moved to the reception room and then we moved to like a speak not a speakeasy it was like a ballroom down at the basement of this hotel

and then it was like after that they had extra food there like late night food pizza and stuff and then after that we moved into like a bar off of that room that was like a speakeasy and like every next room is like getting less and less people because it's like getting later and later so it was like it was like i don't know like three in the morning two in the morning before claire and i went to went to bed our one friend ryan who we were with stayed up till four in the morning with the bride and groom and like a couple other people and what was hilarious is like we brought like hannah told ryan and me to get beer so ryan gets a 30 pack and i was like why are you getting 30 beers for a wedding like there's gonna be be there he's like i don't know man it turns out like they ended up we ended up drinking all of it because he brought it into like that extra room before

the speakeasy and then while we were in the speakeasy we were just grabbing beers and bringing them into the room and like the bartenders were like really chill with it because i while we were in the speakeasy, we were just grabbing beers and bringing them into the room. And like the bartenders were like really chill with it. Cause I guess that's like against the rules of like, you're supposed to be a hotel bar. So I don't like, like speakeasy thing. And it was like three in the morning. Like, I don't think, like, I think they were just like happy people where they're getting drunk or something. Cause I don't know. I mean, they probably got paid ahead of time and it doesn't matter at that point right yeah yeah so they were cool though

um and then i guess quick this week uh football's back uh your boy went 10 and 1 for betting absurd oh two hundred dollars your boys haven't uh having a start to the season. My irresponsible pick of the week is Penn State Moneyline. And I did say irresponsible. So, a disclaimer. Was that your one that you got wrong? No, no, no. I'm saying this week. Like, going into Auburn.

Oh, this week. Yeah. No, don't do that. I said irresponsible. What's the line?uburn is bad penn state's favored uh by three and a half points i think but tommy penn state's also bad that is true my more responsible pick of that game is bet the spread or not the spread but the over because it's like 46 and a half right now and we gave up 10 to ohio and like we're gonna give up more than that and our offense is okay like they seem to string together some points so like i think that we're gonna hit the over on 50 or

something anyway um um um i facetimed zach twice this week or he facetim me once randomly and then I FaceTimed him randomly on Friday night because we were doing nothing so I'm going to rate it two Zach FaceTimes so I had to squeeze that in because I'm going long so sorry you're fine it's been forever man alright Stank Engine how's your past four months been

oh god just trying to settle in to San Diego it's been rough but yeah oh funny story about the penn state purdue game that i don't think i ever told you guys um i was talking to my dad on the phone about it and my dad he's hilarious he's's like the most pessimistic sports fan of all time. He seen some championships in his days, but not much.

He, remember like when Purdue caught that third down pass and that pretty much sealed the game, but it turned out it hit the ground. Well, he like just like turned off the television and like stormed off to bed afterwards and then like um walked upstairs he turned it on the tv and then like all of a sudden penn state came back and he had no idea that dude like dropped the pass

until he was like talking about it uh to his uh co-worker the next day because he like turned off the tv and like pouted a little bit and turned it back on and then penn state won and so he was just like how did that happen like purdue basically like all they had to do to kneel it out just thought he imagined how many years has he been scarred by penn state i'm just trying to figure out like at what age am I gonna just turn the TV off well he he peaked so hard because his freshman

and senior year Penn State won the national championship like he probably went to like the four years that four best years that you possibly could have gone to Penn State you don't think the year after Joe Paterno died in the Jerry Sandusky scandal happened was the best year to Penn State. You don't think the year after Joe Paterno died and the Jerry Sandusky scandal happened

was the best year of Penn State football? Come on. Oh, yeah. My bad. So we got to experience that. A couple riots. Those were fun. Yeah, definitely historical.

We got that on our side. All right, let's see. The past four months... You can just do this weekend. You don't need to tell everything. Yeah, I'm not going to do that. Let's see. This past weekend,

I... On Saturday, I coached little kids. I hate it. I've already mentioned on this pod before, I fuckinged little kids. I hate it. I've already mentioned on this pod before, I fucking hate kids. Only reason I'm doing it is like a little side hustle for money and hopefully like meeting some friends that coach there too, which I have. So it's been like paying off, but I don't know how much longer I can take it um the way you phrased that I was picturing

like Tommy's like making friends with all the kids like playing Pokemon yeah how are you not best friends with all the little kids just talk about Pokemon Go or something oh dude I do really appreciate this one kid because all of a sudden, like, everyone wears their, like, house league jerseys from practice.

Everyone in this one group of kids, probably like 10 to 12 years old. This kid just shows up in a devil's jersey with the number 69 on it. Love it. This kid's like 10 it this kid sure wasn't you i'm shocked that it wasn't me but i was like dude that's a sick jersey he's like thanks and then i went up to the coaches i was like why is this kid wearing a devil's 69 jersey and they're like yeah apparently he like has all 32 NHL teams customized with the number 69. And he just like randomly wears them throughout practice. I was like, this kid is a legend. How old are these kids?

This kid, he's like 10. Like they're like not that old. Got those rich parents out in California, man. That's awesome though. I'm very jealous um yeah but this is a couple you should start like just like do any of them play pokemon you should just start can't you still like trade like just like ruin their pokemon game and just like you yeah send them off with every pokemon like i don't know get something else out of it yeah just team rocket

yeah there you go get one of those giant contraptions that they have in the shows like just put like a giant like pit of spikes in the ice that they can't actually see and then they'll all fall into it nice okay yeah and then i'll just steal their nintendo switch easy easy peasy um easy claps then i got home took an edible and watched usc clap stanford and then went to my friend's house show where he does like stand-up comedy too well and So what do you mean house show then? So we went to a friend's place in Del Mar. He had a backyard. And my friend hosted it.

And his friends, who are also comedians like they just like took turns doing but you said he had a no so like actual he said he did a house show but he also does stand-up so i didn't know if you meant he yeah i was thinking like dj like house music okay so it's just stand-up okay no not like house music yeah but he does like music along with it he like makes funny songs he kind of like Bo Burnham vibes

oh nice it's funny yeah Brian how was your give him a rating come on you have to do your ranking yeah oh my ranking um Give him a rating. Come on. You have to do your ranking. Yeah. Oh, my ranking? Let's see.

Five out of five Caleb Williams touchdowns. Fair enough. I forgot he went to USC. You said you're a Penn State fan now fan now oh I'm going to a minor league I'm both go to a minor league soccer soccer game nice this weekend

be sure to heckle the goalie they'll really appreciate that thank you I will for you how was my week thanks Corey it's been a while so i got some denver stories one i went to like cook like two weeks ago and the like it's like an electric stovetop so the little like thingy kind of came out and so like it always happened in college to like push

it back in so i knew how to fix it but i like pulled it out when i pulled it out i saw something under it i was like what is that so they pulled like the rest of the stove top off there's like two full cans of beans that were just poured inside of the stove and then like cooked so there's like a full inch thick layer of just baked beans literally baked into the stove that had to like clean out from whoever was here last ridiculous like i i don't know how you missed the pot that badly it was it was so much it was insane and then freaking i was like sitting here working one day here knocking the door next to mine well the day before there's someone who like at the hotel room next to me like coming in and out all day and i was like i don't

know whatever it was fine it wasn't like anything was going on there's like in and out a lot but i was like the only person who lived near me so far but then the next day someone knocks in the door really hard and goes denver police and i'm like uh so i like look out my little window and try to like peek to see what's going on and they're like we have a card we're gonna walk in so they tried to use their little card to get in but using the cards to get in the doors here you have to do it in like a really specific way so they sat there and tried to open the door for a good 25 minutes it just like couldn't and then they realized no one was still in there so they just kind of like walked away and then never came back but man i was i was peeking through the window little peep and tom

just the whole time just trying to figure out what was gonna go on but then nothing ever came with that so like i don't know but then like two days later i came back from the gym parked in the parking lot and i see there's like caution tape over a couple of the doors i was like oh crap what happened this time and like walk up to like go snoop on it and it's just like halloween decorations and i'm like man this place has got me like so paranoid that i think there's like so much stuff going on because again like two days after that one there's like a dude in the parking lot with like a flashlight and the little thing to like on to like break into a car door that you like put through the uh window and stuff like that i was like oh there's a dude in the freaking parking lot just trying to bring him to a car right now but i'm like watching him and he's like not doing it and it's like taking him a long time

and he also has like a fanta on top of the car and he's just kind of like looks frustrated and he like goes around to each four of the four windows it's the car right next to mine too so i'm like kind of freaking out but then he just like keeps trying and he's not doing it right i'm like maybe he just locked his keys in his car then i watched like the full rest of whatever football game was on that night and i'm like oh whatever happened that guy and i look back out my window again he's still out there trying to like get his keys out of his car so he definitely wasn't trying to break into anybody's car he was just like locked out so again this place has got me paranoid um but last one for weird motel stories i was like walking up and down trying to do laundry so i walked by this guy who was like in the hallway just like or in the stairwell like

sort of smoking something i don't know he looked not great um and like one of the last times i walked up to my room like my laundry's like hey man you look like my friend i was like all right and i keep walking he's like yeah he's like, Hey man, you look like my friend. I was like, all right. And I keep walking. He's like, yeah, he's like African origin, man. I was like, okay. Yeah. And I just walked by.

That's a terminology you start walking away from. I don't know what you think you see in me, but I'm very white, but thank you. I, I, he sees that dog in you. I don't know, it was weird uh so this this won't tell man it's been entertaining but strange can't wait to leave but got some stories from it so that's good uh got to see the dragon you're gonna miss us so much no got to see the new dragon ball movie this week guys it was actually it was so good so good highly recommend it after coming back from that though uh did a quick google search on like hyperbaric chambers to sleep in because i don't know got my mind thinking uh they're like twenty thousand dollars

so if you guys want to chip in to split one to buy one okay yeah i think it's like that's expensive as fuck to just spend one night in no no no you don't like buy think it's like that's expensive as fuck to just spend one night in no no no you don't like buy it it's like a little like tent for your home kind of it's like a sleeping bag but like really big if that makes sense and what what is it I've never heard of this before you just like pump

oxygen into it so you breathe higher amounts of oxygen and it's like good for you I don't know in in dragon ball they have the hyperbaric time chambers that's where my mind was going got it gotcha yeah okay also this movie theater had heated seats like the the little reclining ones which like are pretty normal now but like i never had one that actually have heaters in their seat didn't use it because i was gonna fall asleep if i did but sick so movie theaters just stepping their game up i'm pumped about it uh also i mean they kind

of have to i know rooks would be hyped about this next one but he's not here so i'm like socket rooks i got tickets to get socket i got tickets to go see the movie the room but before it starts there's a q a by tommy wuzow himself so i get to see him in person so like it's gonna be pretty tight because rooks loves that movie slash the parody of that movie is that this weekend i think it's this saturday yeah coming up so i wonder if i can get a photo with him i would be not shocked if tommy's living in your fucking hotel it seems weird enough that he might just be like, he might pop in. You know the story with Tommy Wiseau? He's like, he funded his whole movie himself, so he

has money somehow. So that dude's secretly rich. Oh yeah, but nobody knows how. Sure, but he's weird enough where who knows? He might try to break into your car slash his car slash other people's

cards i hope so i would recognize him though who knows he doesn't look like any of the other tweakers that are around here so it'd be cool i'll be pumped to see him he's african aborigin right i guess i could see it i could see it if it's in me it's in him as well um i mean maybe also went to this it was like pouring rain all saturday so i was like what the hell indoor things are in denver because it's all like hikes and nonsense there's this place called meow wolf where have you ever seen on instagram there's like i mean buy a ticket on instagram there's this like video that's always shared of these people going to like a laundry a laundromat and they like walk into one of the

washers and dryers into like this weird like rave looking thing in the back do you guys know that video yes so it's actually yeah oh yeah you know platform nine and three quarters right yeah yeah yeah same thing same thing um but that video that's the one that's in vegas and there's a version of that here in denver man is it strange it's just like a collection of like 70 plus rooms that just are all like different willy wonka slash matrix slash like nonsense you just because every door doesn't have like a label on it there's just kind of like doors everywhere and you just walk in and it's like scooby-doo well it's like just a brand new room of like all right well this whole room is completely upside down and everything's pink like okay and then you just see another door open that's like sort of painted same to the wall that

you didn't realize and you walk through there and it's like all right this room the entire walls floors and ceilings are all spirals and they're all moving and you can't figure out where you are it's like okay and you're walking through another random door it's it's so cool you just get lost and it's like so so so so so strange so highly recommend it like it's it lives up to the weird hype of it because everyone says it's really cool and strange but like it actually is really really really odd one of the like first rooms i went in it's like just blank where you are but there's like a two foot tall like opening in the ground that you can like crawl into and you just see people crawling in and out of it and you're like well i guess i have to crawl into that so you crawl in and there's not like a place to get out

on the other side but there's little like holes above you they can like poke your head out of and you don't know what is in there so you like poke your head up out of it and there's like animals around but it's like designed like the environment where like you know the little meerkats that like poke their head out of the ground like in the africa african safari stuff like that so it's designed like that though but there's a bunch of holes for all of you to put your head out so you like put your head up into it and you're confused and then you just see a bunch of heads popping in and out like little meerkats around you dying laughing it's just so like i don't you don't know what you're getting yourself

into and then you walk in you're like all right well that's strange you're walking to the next room and everything's this is a fucking fever dream. Dude, it's... This is like the amount of random fucking stories that you have of Denver where I'm like... And like, I like Denver, but like, man, your experience of Denver is a lot different than my experience of going to see like a Rockies game and having drinks downtown. I'm like, what? Like, I don't... I feel like you're in the upside down like i don't know what the fuck city you're in are you sure you're in denver are you still in the u.s it doesn't make

any sense to me i walked in meow wolf one side walked out the other i'm just like it's strange sounds terrifying i'm not gonna lie it sounds terrifying It sounds like I don't want to go to Denver. Sounds like you had like an acid flashback or something. Dude, if you, I was just saying, like, if you go to Meow Wolf and take drugs beforehand, I'm sure you have like a crazy time, but like you need to take it like the smallest amount of drugs because like showing up there sober, you're already confused. If you showed up there like very high, you would like probably need help. Like someone would have to call bad trips for you because you would have a bad trip immediately no but like here's the thing

i feel like the clientele are people who are just getting high and going there like i honestly think you might be one of the only people i know that would go to that like sober so like i don't like right i feel like that has to be like a trippy thing to do that everybody's like oh like let's go like like let's go get high and go to the fucking whatever it's called nine and two quarters laundromat nine and two quarters yeah that should be that should be the uh the name of it okay the nine and two quarter i'll write that down laundromat as you should incredible i like hilarious that you're writingundromat. As you should. Like hilarious that you're writing it down,

going back to you, writing everything down. When, when is that going to come up again? I don't know, but it's in there. Last story, Denver.

Cause you said crazy here. They're like replacing all the lights apparently in this motel or something. But like, I didn't know that. So there's like, and the lights like right above my door on the outside so i just hear someone talking outside my door and they like knock on the door hard i'm like what's up and then they just like talk back in spanish i'm like uh hello and they just like keep messing with the door and like speaking so i try to like peek out the window again and there's this guy there

and she's like standing i'm like uh i'm not gonna open the door and then i hear him like keep talking again and he's just talking to the other guy who's like working on the thing but like they're banging on my door replacing that light and it freaked me out again for another like half an hour pretty much every day i have a panic attack and then i get back to normal because it's not anything to actually be worried about it's just me having my own prejudice prejudices based on like the first two days i was here and there's a lot of nonsense going around how many stars is this place ranked for your like two like online right like other people like you pulled the audience too okay so i think you're in the rights to be a little sketched out oh yeah well it's like the

first real two-star thing i've ever been to because usually it's like you give a place five stars so it's fine or like four if one thing was off this one's like no everyone said it's not one star like i didn't get murdered but i was close so two stars i think it would have to be a one star just above getting murdered because if everyone's getting murdered then you're not ranking it right like so sorry assassinating themselves you can't really that's zero stars one star is attempted murder like you survived there yeah you survived at least long enough to post it on yelp you were like the first thing i'm doing police report no yelp one star the people got just to know yeah that's social media grind man it's a rating for the week two weeks whatever a month

uh dead queen long live king chuck i love it nothing related to any of the stories um i just like had a had a random thought can you current give me a current standing of every place you've stayed at like just a quick rank like go oh boom boom boom just give me airbnb wise no no no we'll go city like we oh i so think you can find other places than these b&bs so like i'll factor it in though uh indianapolis bottom tier because garbage city i hate that place it's so small it was so hot airbnb also sucked jeremy and megan i love you i don't know why you live there don't like that get wrecked jeremy and megan uh then raleigh uh surprisingly expensive also it's the south also hot lots of like uh trump people down there not great um but other than that it's

kind of cool uh then goes denver because you know the teens are kind of crazy it's interesting things are kind of crazy though people are too outdoorsy here like i was trying to when it was that rainy day i tried to look up things to do inside in denver and all the responses were like why would you want to do that i was like guys like i need something it's raining it's 50 degrees and raining outside i'm not gonna do anything outside he looks up raining outside it just says go fuck yourself brian it's like everybody knows that it's only brian it was stupid so like that immediately like all right these people are way too outdoorsy i like hiking every like once a month but everyone here hikes like every single

day like that's too much man like i need to play some video games and have some air conditioning second dc uh i had a good time i actually have friends there so that was nice i've been there before so that's nice um it's a little too like city though like when you're in the thick of it in dc it's like a lot um so and then what's one do i not have a one yet where else have i been all right so then dc's the top for minneapolis yeah yeah minneapolis is great zero complaints literally nothing like it was across the board like b plus maybe it is funny the way the rankings are going are like what's wrong with it like your description your description of minneapolis which the was it's number one which been there great city yeah i like not surprised you like it that's cool hilarious

though that it's number one because nothing wrong like i mean like no negatives well yeah but like i think you're what you're looking at i'm not a negative means it's either neutral or positive so i could say all positives you know i guess my only negative it just seems like a glass glass empty kind of a vibe you know it's a there's no empty glasses kind of a vibe yeah yeah yeah uh the only downside the glasses all have water yeah yeah it's just it's. So like, eh, it's not new or anything. So, but I think I'll, I'll have some things that will top it in the future.

I'm going to, so we'll see, but that's a ranking as is. You guys want to get into some ethics questions? Mr. Therapist, you ready? Business.

Sure. Speaking of hiking though, I saw a tweet the other day that i had to share it says dating apps have taught me that if i don't enjoy hiking that i will die alone and i have i feel that so hard but yeah i hate when people have that on their dating apps when it's like they live in dc or something it's we know you don't hike that much there's nothing there's not that many mountains around here in denver though it's every photo they have is them with like a backpacking backpack on i'm like yeah it ain't gonna work man it is it is the dating apps general it's the current generation version of you know when you used to

watch like the game shows and it would be like long walks on the beach. It's that it's our present day version of that. It's like like to go on hikes. Well, it's also like their own. It's becoming its own version of social media. Like you have to impress or have like a certain persona about it. Like all these girls that I see, they're like scuba diving like, on top of Mount Everest or the pyramids of Egypt. And it's like, that's not your life. I hope not.

If they're on the top of Mount Everest, that might be their life. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm on Corey's side there. Yeah, like. That takes some. Yeah, on that one. Some dedication to actually get there. Cajones. Do you ever just like to

smoke some weed and watch TV or something? I feel you though. Every travel... Is Pokemon... I had a good thought. Every travel Instagram, it's all the same pose, the same clothes like i don't know how you wore a full face of makeup and all of these

like clean clothes to the top of this mountain because i know it's far i know you like sweated a lot and you like brought makeup with you to redo it at the top of the mountain so you could look good it's like that's that's weird or or they're really pretty um i have another idea though do they have they is pokemon gonna be in like the metaverse like do they have vr pokemon because like when at what point are they gonna make it where like you can actually be like in the pokeverse and like I mean right have you played Pokemon Go yeah but like you're not meeting

other people like you're going outside and doing stuff it was that was like a big thing okay I know you guys are playing Pokemon Go but I'm saying like like interacting with other people I feel like you don't it gets you outside but you're not it's not interactive with other people like i might run to the park and there might be 20 other people in that park like looking at like at their phones but you're

still not doing you know what i mean like when it like it should be like a so like a social media type of like pokemon game right like you want to be like at virtual reality not augmented reality sure yeah i guess like you want to go literally i was thinking like there's got to be a way to make pokemon like of of like a social media type game like where you're like i don't know interacting like it like having your own world in there like yeah i guess metaverse whatever yeah so virtual would have like people to have houses and it'd be like virtual reality yeah like it's like sims meets pokemon yeah okay i'd do it i live there tommy moving in roommate i'm just surprised there's not a thing and you guys are the people who'd be able to tell me

oh no they're working on that and that's coming out in 2030 I don't know I mean Pokemon Scarlet and Pearl are coming out in December and those would be cool Jesus Christ Jesus I regret everything um

nah I feel like they're on the slow side of things nintendo like the the new game comes out in november it's the first open world one so like all right are you talking about like you can walk wherever you want outside and like the real world but have some sort of like headset or like projector to like have like fake pokemon or something what do you what do you mean i don't know i feel like there's no like i feel like there's no there's no vr pokemon game that's like what i'm saying okay is there no yeah like i like i'm trying to make up the idea for a game that doesn't exist and would be worth billions of dollars right now on the spot that's a simple way of saying it there is no vr pokemon game that i know of unless you guys would tell me that there

is if nintendo actually like invested any money into vr they would definitely do it that'd be the first thing they would put into it because because it's one of their main franchises. But Xbox, like Microsoft, has their own VR system, and then PlayStation has their own VR system. But you can't walk around and adventure and do VR at the same

time, right? You can walk around in the VR world. Yeah. But you'd have be like confined to your house yeah it's more of like you have the headset and you have a controller the controller walks you around but the headset you control where you're looking and so corey you're saying like what if you could i would have i would have that in my house and brian have that in my house, and Brian would have that in his house, and then, like, in the VR headset. I'm saying whatever VR is now, so yeah. But also, like, why couldn't you overlay, like, the map on an actual map so you could do, like, either, like, Pokemon Go or VR?

It'd be interesting. What? Overlay a map on a map like if you had the option to do vr or you could go to that park and like actually physically like put be on pokemon go if you didn't want to get up out of the house but other people did want to do pokemon go it's literally the same thing it's just one option they have hacks you can hack pokemon go and make your little character walk around there you go they did that a while ago. There you go. People cheated doing that because they didn't want to actually do the Go part of Pokemon Go.

Yeah, probably. Which is smart because who wants to walk that much? Change your location. Got it. Anyway, ethics. Go for it. Okay. All right. So we'll start simple.

It'll be the obvious one that everyone's talked about. And then there's a version of this question that I heard recently that like this is the five the train where you can change the track i have the train drift where you get both tracks and you could kill all six people answered next question uh achievement unlocked good job that was not possible so yeah the trolley problem it's the 1v5 there's one person on one side of the tracks five on the other side of tracks the train's going towards the one but you can push a button and turn it towards the five pushing the button means you or it's going towards the five you can push it it'll go towards the one pushing the button means you acted and you killed the one person but you saved the five and the question's always do you

push the button or not and i feel like that one's pretty simple yeah kill all six push the button like yeah exactly kill all six walk away no and there's no witness honestly that's the answer you would only feel bad about yourself and i assume there's no conductor if you have to hit a switch because why the fuck would it not be on the conductor? So there's nobody there. Honestly, flip the question around right there. I think I kill all six. I walk away. And like, I don't know, maybe someday I forget.

Maybe sometime like, I don't know, like did that actually happen? Nobody knows. It's why you're in Denver. It's all a fever dream. I'm scrolling through my employee roster now for people you can talk to i'm very concerned um i my honest answer i feel like you you flip the switch because it's five lives like i that's i feel like that has to be right because because then i would feel like an

innocent bystander and i'm like well oh yeah there's five people dead and i could have done something versus like yeah i realized that i did switch something but you're giving me two options and one is five lives and one is one life and if that one life is brian i'm hammering the button and he's out jokes on you i planned this from the beginning i'm assassinating myself well yeah the trolley answer is they assassinated themselves exactly and i saved five lives it's easier to grab one person's banner and res than five. Facts. Yeah.

That's a really good answer. There's no way there's five respawn beacons still left on the map for all those five people. But no. That's true. I feel like that's the simple question. I feel like there's usually, everyone says push the button. People don't really push back on that a lot. But reddit there was like a different version of this question and the like further explanations of it was like it's the same premise but when the context is different it feels very different so instead of train tracks trolley whatever

you're in a hospital there are five people who need an organ donation or they'll die. And a healthy person is in the waiting room who is a perfect donor for all five of those people. But that person would die if you harvest all of their organs. It's the same one person dies, five people lives. But the context is so much different. And some of the responses were just like like there's less of a clear answer on it it's more of where does your head go do you even think about who to save or not save and like how you act do i have to physically kill them or like i'm there standing as the decision maker and a bunch of doctors go out and do their thing we could play with it a little bit

we could give you a knife i don't know know. Like, even that decision, though. I'll tell you what. If I'm playing Operation, there's going to be six people dead. In which case, that's my answer. It was hard to imagine drifting the train over six people. Very easy to imagine

you botching for six surgeries. These questions are getting easier. Give me another one. All right, so Nick's that, cause we already knew the answer there. It's just you making the decision then. Cause it's, it's literally an innocent person.

I think the difference kind of is before one person was going to die. Like that single person. I don't like it messes with my head. Do I, thinking about it this way, do I meet these people beforehand? And I'm like, am I,

is it like at the hospital? They were like, he's in the waiting room. They're like, Hey, this is like, this is Kyle. You know,

these are these other five people. And then I walk into the next room and they're like, so you just met all them, right? Yeah. You met him. So these five are dying. And then we have to kill this person.

Cause then, yeah, the, the, the decision's a little bit difficult i would say if i don't know i'm like fuck it let him go okay let him go how old is the person that we're harvesting organs for to the are they 80 do they have a long life how young are the other people i there's a lot of questions that need to answer for me i mean to on the train tracks what if it's five 90 year olds and the other side's a baby one baby versus

five 90 year olds who do you kill but then that then there's gonna be five lives up in heaven or hell i don't know what kind of life did they live all right so you how all right so you think a baby is worth five elderly people all right all right i'll i'll put it this way right like what's the consolidated amount of life left with those 590 people probably not as much as there is what if you knew they were all gonna live till a hundred so that's 50 years although dead baby jokes hilarious so that is a pro also a slight chance the train runs at the baby and just like goes over it because it's so small i'm being dumb. Original answer. Just drift it again. All six. Okay. Tommy, what are your thoughts on the medical side of the context for this? You're the therapist, so give us a thoughtful answer or drift it.

I don't know. Kill all six. All right. Are we talking the train or the hospital hospital um um

okay answer your question with a question what do you call a dead baby pinned to your wall art art there you go art art poster um yeah sorry hold on somehow tommy's answer was worse than me killing all six people

i like it uh it's our sense of humor you gotta really just assassination joke and then you put in a real answer and then you go back to a dead baby joke you know the hamburger method of like compliments but it's that with like serious conversations um alright in all honesty I think I think I would let the five people die

cause they're already like in the process of approaching death whereas the one other person is like they punch their ticket completely completely innocent yeah they're healthy and unknowing and like a bystander so it feels different right but it's still just a 1v5 question like what's what how many lives is one life worth but i like i don't i mean yeah i mean it makes sense i like that it's different because it's harder but like realistically i don't think

i it's not it's the doctors aren't allowed to do that they're not allowed to be like hey you've got all the organs we need so you're out and these guys are in so like like as of now that's the lot like i feel yeah sure until pokemon vr is around yeah that's the way it's gonna be i need to save my ride on give me your gallbladder i feel like tommy's answer is i feel like tommy's answer is the right answer because it's like yeah yeah, we're not going to ask a doctor to just like straight up merge someone. Now it's like if it's like, do you want to pull the plug on this person? Sure. Fucking yank it.

Kill the power breaker switches off the hospital. But like, well, so what if it's. There's six people. They all need organ transplants so they're all gonna die but you could kill the one okay and save all the other five oh they're out they're gone then you're actively killing them it's like the one has instead of maybe they could wait and find yeah i would act i would actively kill them i would actively kill him. Nurse, what room?

Just Corey at the press conference the next day. He ended up assassinating himself. There's an epidemic going on right now. As a doctor, we went in and we had a certain amount of time to harvest the organs and save these other. You know what? Do you want to interview these other five people we have standing here actually and yesterday they were not okay so back to my i don't know if like so if the one was like they need an organ but if like you don't actively kill the one there's a chance they could still live i don't know

is the solution we just it's a chance i'm not willing to take the solution we just assassinate the king chuck the third is that it harvest their organs that's how he's gonna die oh oh full circle baby all right condom gun king chuck Chuck III in the hospital. He's dying. We're saving the six. Then those six are going onto the train. And then with that train, we're drifting that train killing the rest of the UK. Everyone on board? And the corgis.

All aboard! Drift the train. No horoscope this week. Outro Music