I've Had It - Ban Straight Marriage

Episode Date: March 6, 2025

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Patriots, gaytriots, thaytriots, welcome to America's Top DEI Podcast, starring me, Paps, and me. Okay, so listen, do you remember how we've had like listeners make us jingles? Yeah. I want a new jingle in Trump's America listener, creative, musically creative jingle makers that's like, welcome to America's top DEI podcast. DEI. Yes. That's a great idea. I really think I need that to get me through a couple more months. Yeah. I mean, I think we have to stop looking at, okay, we're going to get to 2026, I think we need to look at, we need to get through March 31st. And

then we need to get through April 15th. Yeah. And maybe break it down two weeks, a month. Move the goalposts. Right. Because it is overwhelming. Four years away is overwhelming. Two years seems like it'll never happen but you can remotely envision getting through the next 30 days. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right, Pumps, what have you had it with? Okay, what I've had it with is I've had it when you buy something and you think it's put together and you get it home and you take it out of the box and you have to put it fucking together and not only do they give you instructions that are unclear, the type is so tiny and I know that I can't see

and I have to wear readers at my advanced age. But I shit you not, I was trying to put together a dog bed that came in a huge box. There was no reason that it wasn't prepackaged. Just open it up. I mean, mattresses you open up and they make, you know, they fill up with air and they're up. I mean mattresses you open up and they make, you know, they fill up with air and they're fine. I had like three parts. I had to zip certain things in,

take them out. I mean I had this dog bed all over me. It probably took me 30 minutes just to figure out which end the directions were discussing in the directions because the type was so tiny. I have had it with anything DIY related and I know this doesn't really count as that, but for me it does because I can't do anything myself. Is it DIY or DIY? DIY. DIY. And is it only fans or fans only? I always say it wrong so I can never remember. Only fans. Only fans. Listeners, she always says, you think that girl has a fans only account?

And Kylie's always like, it's only fans pumps. Okay, a few things about this. I really suffered from what you're talking about when my kids were little. The worst. And Christmas Eve was brutal because you had all these toys and you had to put them together because we lied to our kids and tell them that Santa brought them. Absolutely. Santa doesn't wrap gifts.

They're just left under the tree. And so Josh and I would be up and Josh Welch does not own a screwdriver. I mean, zero tools, zero stereotypical ability of a man to assemble anything. And I will remind the listener, he just discovered manscaping recently at his consultation at Best Buy. So that's what I was up against, right? So I end up being the one that has to assemble everything because as an interior designer, when we're on job sites, and sometimes stuff arrives, you learn how if something's not put together, you have to put it together.

You have to do it before the client gets there for the big reveal. So I was always the one that was dicked over there, putting all this stuff together. But I'm curious about the bed. Was this like, did you order your dog a canopy bed? Or was this, or it's just a cushion with a case and you zipped it up?

It had an egg crate bottom and then it had sides you had to install and then you had to put all that in the washable cover. All right, follow-up. Was this a purchase on Instagram? No, one of the few things that I've purchased not on Instagram lately which that could be a headache because I fell into the trap again of buying something on Instagram. I thought it was just gonna get rid of all my crow's feet. News flash, it didn't. But no, I ordered this for my big dog. So it's an extra large, you know, for a 100 pound dog.

So it's big, but the box was big. When I opened it up and it came in rolls, I was like, do I have the right thing? Like I'm looking on the box, like who is this from? How can this be that I just didn't open this up and it was already made? How did I have to do this? Because it's Trump's America. Here's the deal. Before January 20th, I would have opened that box. It would have fluffed right out. 24 hours later, it would have been a fluffy cloud. These are the microaggressions of the Donald Trump presidency. I agree with

you. We are not competent enough to assemble these things. We would prefer that they come assembled. Agreed. Okay, this is America is not known for being the brightest. And so certainly not now. Please help us. Okay. Let me tell you what I've had it with. And this is rather pedestrian, but I just think it's something we have me tell you what I've had it with, and this is rather pedestrian, but I just think it's something we have to talk about. I've had it with Elon Musk. I have just absolutely had it with Elon Musk, and let me break it down for you and the listener. Number one, you think is if you're raised in a hyper-capitalistic society like the United States, that if somebody has money, they're smart.

And then the older you get, the more you sit around people with money, you're thinking, well, that guy's kind of a dipshit. You know, especially in Oklahoma, you run into a bunch of like oil and gas guys that kind of struck gold like, you know, Jed Clampett and Beverly Hillbillies. And you're like, well, that guy's a dipshit. Clampett and Beverly Hillbillies. And you're like, well, that guy's a dipshit. So the more and more I see this guy speak, the more I'm like, what on earth is going on here?

And then you start unpackaging it. Like before he sucked up to Trump, he was a rich guy that owned Tesla. I didn't really care beyond that. I never really saw videos of him talking. I just knew he owned Tesla and he lived in California. And then you heard some, he's moving to Texas and then he starts sucking up to Trump. Well, then you find out that he is a total parasite that sucks off the US government to the tune of over $20 billion. 20 billion dollars. And then all these MAGA are like, we don't want immigrants taking our money.

This is American taxpayer money for Americans. And this MF'er is from South Africa, no disrespect to our South African listeners, we love you, we hate Musk. You find out that this MF'er is from South Africa and comes over here and he thinks we need to reorganize and redo everything for him. Right? And MAGA is so goddamn dumb. They're just going right along with it. The only, and I mean pumps, the only thing that has been even a tad enjoyable, but also somewhat terrifying at the same time. You can have a compound emotion. It's enjoyable, it also kind of terrifies me.

It's just how much he's emasculated Donald Trump. Donald Trump's posture around him. He's slumped over, he looks defeated. Elon Musk, in the total flex move of all flex moves takes his toddler into the Oval Office while Trump sitting there slouched over. I mean like like he's in the fetal position behind the resolute desk. Elon Musk has his little kid picking boogers and wiping him on his desk and telling him off. Right, tell him shh you're not the president. And I've just I've had it I don't understand and

I need a MAGA person to explain this to me like I'm five, how you don't like people sucking off the government and you don't like non-Americans sucking off the government. Yet you're all chips in on a South African sucking off the government to the tune of over 20 billion dollars and is rewarding himself while he's managing the federal government new government contracts. Right, and taking over agencies completely. And I just want to go and say this. Number one, I think his cars are ugly.

Well, the Tesla, it's, I mean. I think it's ugly. It's not a visual assault on my eyes, just the normal one. The cyber truck is an assault. It's awful. I think his rockets are stupid. I think the cars are ugly. I think the truck is ugly.

And I think he needs to be deported. And that is my grievance for today. Well, I think that there is probably no higher value grievance than that one. So it was absolutely not pedestrian. But I am one of those people that fell into the trap. Well, I mean, he invented Tesla and he didn't. That's a myth. He didn't invent Tesla. This is just what I assumed. And then I hear him speak and how he behaves. And I think, this guy is a complete nut and fascist and authoritarian and mean and cruel and awful. And why doesn't he take his billions

and do something for good instead of burn the whole world down? Because he's a sociopathic drug addict. Right. And I think he and Vladimir Putin have a European domination, like bro thing. Yeah, probably. OK, I want to welcome you to I've Had It, America's Top DEI

podcast. I'm Jennifer. I'm Angie. She's the star of the show. She's America's legal eagle, despite somebody else already having branded themselves that we are piggybacking. How about I can be the DEI legal eagle? I like it. I like where your head's at. Pumps has been in a terrible mood today. Her dog ingested some nicotine pouches last night. She called me and said, I answered the phone, hello. I hate that I got married. I hate that I have kids.

I hate that I bought this dog. I fucking hate everything. I am so fucking mad. I go, what happened? Ali found one of the kids' naked teen pouches and I think he ingested it and I'm going to get a stomach pump. So she's been in very foul mood. Not to mention the fact that because we have this other podcast, IHIP News, we have to stay abreast of the 24-hour news cycle, which is the most sadistic thing on the planet. It really is. It's awful. So in order to treat Pumps and Mental Health, I'm going to read some comments to her online. Here's a comment that somebody left for us on YouTube.

His name is Scott Zanger, 2019. Hey, pervert network. Why don't you talk about 31% of America like the radical left-wing pervert party Democrats? Look it up. The American don't want illegal immigrants, trans crap, woke crap, drag shows crap, DEI crap, period. Scott, what I'm going to say to you is the vice president is a drag queen.

Right. There is, just Google it. President! Google, no, but Google JD Vance Drag Queen. Right, he was in drag. Yeah. There are drag pictures. He wears eyeliner and he is dying to pop a smoky eye.

There's no question. And then he says here, the Americans don't want illegal immigrants. Look no further than my aforementioned grievance. Okay, so then I have one for you that this will really cheer you up. Somebody posted on one of our shows, I don't know which podcast it was, but one of them, and her name is Maria Alvarez, and she says, Meemaw meat curtains, tell sis her forehead looks slightly oily. We can't be hypocritical ladies.

Meat curtains, your matte makeup is on point. Oh my gosh. Here's the deal. I'm throwing myself into the bus because I know it brings you joy. Okay, here's the thing. I am obsessed with that I'm oily faced. I'm obsessed with what my great aunt

used to call the dewy look. I don't like it. I like pure matte. I know that's in Jennifer, when I'm obsessing about it, she's like, that's in know that's in Jennifer when I'm obsessing about it she's like that's in that's in. So for this person to hit me right where like that's like my number one thing that I worry about is sitting here with a complete baby oil face. Like we did when we interviewed Kamala Harris. That is something I will

never ever get over like when they played that on The View and I saw our picture I just thought we look like hammered oil dog it. Like when they played that on The View and I saw our picture, I just thought- We look like hammered oil dog shit. Like did you just come out of the baby oil pool before you met the vice president? That's exactly what it looks like. Didn't get her hair done? What a bunch of dipshits. Anyway, that's not the point. The point is thank you for noticing. And I'm always good to tell you if you have an oily forehead. I didn't notice that.

Well, apparently on this particular day you did. I didn't. And, but I just know that you like, you know, it's just a little dagger, a little light bashing of me. Especially after how beautiful you were at the restaurant. Exactly. And how athletic the doctor said I was. It's just been your past seven days.

So I just wanted to cheer you up with that. I'm much cheered. Somebody put me in my place with my oily face, which is oily right now. No, it's not because I was looking when I was talking to you. Okay. Listener, this may come as a total shock to you, but Pumps and I have not always been this pulled together and rock solid. In fact, we used to be rather screwed up when you say Pumps. I would say damn near psychotic. Totally. And we have written a cell phone expose. One could even say it's a manifesto. And the book title is Life is a Lazy Susan of Shit

Sandwiches. In all sincerity, we share a lot of our struggles that led us to this grand stage where we can talk about petty grievances. You can click the link below in the show notes to pre-order your copy now. Listener, I have to share with you, Pumps and I both treated ourselves to a tushy bidet. And this is the ultimate luxury. It's not crazy expensive at all. It is so easy to install and it is just a complete game changer each and every time you visit the commode. What I love about Tushy is I feel so extra special clean afterwards. And you have electric in your bathroom. I don't. And Tushy has a toilet for either one of us. Aura is Tushy's brand new electric bidet with an auto open lid and seat. Instant warm water

that never runs cold and UV sterilization for next level hygiene. Listener, elevate your comfort every day for life for a limited time. Our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order when you use code HADDOT at the checkout. That's 10% off your first bidet order at HelloTushy.com with the promo code HADDOT. Elevate your comfort every day for life for a limited time. Our listeners get 10% off their first bidet order when you use code HADDOT at checkout. That's 10% off your first bidet order at hellotishy.com with promo code HADDOT. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Pumps, I am just feel so much anxiety lately and there's just a lot going on in the world.

And I am so grateful that on my own time, on my own schedule, in the privacy of my own home, I can have a therapy session with my therapist from BetterHelp. It grounds me. It centers me. What's wonderful about your BetterHelp therapist is you get to choose your therapist. It's convenient for your schedule. I like to do it in my own home because I feel no inhibitions and I can say exactly how I feel.

Hosts Access a diverse network of more than 30,000 credentialed therapists with a wide range of specialties. Easily switch therapists at any time for no extra cost. Build your support system with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com slash had it to get 10% off your first month. That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash had it. All right, Kylie. Hello. What's going on on the internet? Okay, I've got a five-star review that is gonna cheer you up even further. Okay. It's titled Orange Makeup Spy. And they write, I'm convinced that Trump's makeup artist is a secret Democrat. I can

hear her or him telling Trump, those people don't know what they're talking about. They're too poor to know what good makeup blending looks like. Love you ladies. Oh, that's good. I believe it. A lot of this stuff that has been going on in this administration, I'm like, it's so randomly odd and vapid and horrible. I'm thinking, are they doing it just to piss people off? And I've thought about that with the makeup artists, too.

Is this just to see how crazy we'll go? Is this a democratic plant? Like, it's not off the board. I think at this point, it's safe to say if there were any democratic plants in the Trump administration, they are failing miserably. Yeah, that's true. Okay, what's next?

Okay, I've got another five star titled Psycho-Analyzing Everyday Situations. Hi ladies, my name is Carson from South Carolina and I've got another five star titled psycho analyzing everyday situations Hi ladies. My name is Carson from South Carolina and I've had it I would like to first say that because of Jennifer, I'm now psycho analyzing people in everyday situations Why does this person feel the need to have 30 Stanleys? Why has Applebee's your go-to date spot on a lonely Friday evening followed by Hannity at nine while you do your skincare with a pearl bedazzled headband. So much pontification and so little time to do it. Anyways, I do indeed have a parasocial relationship with two barely competent middle-aged women and I've never been so enthralled.

Parentheses, I hope you love that word use, Jennifer. Excellent, excellent questions that you're starting to ask yourself now about particular human beings in which we have to share oxygen. An excellent use of vocabulary. Bravo. Well done. Smart listeners. I have a couple of news stories for us to review. The first one is study reveals husbands stress women twice as much as children do. Researchers found that many women feel overwhelmed by the emotional and domestic workload in their marriages, often describing their spouse as an extra child rather than a supportive partner. This imbalance in responsibilities, particularly with household chores and child

care, contributes to increased stress." Pumps. I completely agree with that. I know for me personally in my marriage, my ex-husband was 6,000% more stress and anxiety than the kids were. But let me take you back to baby lawyer Angie, maybe 26, clipping over to the courthouse with this older client that I really, really liked. And I said, you know, how are you doing? We're walking over to get her divorce centered. And we walked out and I said, are you okay? Because some people just have a meltdown, even though they want it. It's just a big, huge change. And she said, I feel liberated because today I didn't lose a husband, I lost a dependent. And I wasn't married. So I didn't know. And that has stuck with me all this

time. And it was exactly what that article is about. Exactly. You know, it's true. It's, it's so crazy because we're under this, we're gaslit into believing that marriage solves a lot of your problems. Like when I'm big, my problems will go away. When I'm married, my problems will go away. When you're in a toxic relationship, if we're married, all of this will be fixed. And marriages are really, really difficult. They bring out whatever your character defects are, they come out like big time in marriage. And I agree, I love Josh, listener, y'all know I do, but he was a million times more stressful for me than my kids. And I'm really lucky of really good kids. They've kind of gone straight down the fairway. They've never really, they're good people. They haven't given me a lot of trouble straight down the fairway. They've never really, they're good people.

They haven't given me a lot of trouble. And the trouble that they have been is the good trouble where they've had to learn, no, you can't do that. You know, what have you. So I've been really hashtag blessed in that regard. But I'm telling you, man, the stress, when I think about being in my 30s, yeah, fuck, all the stress came from the

husband. I completely agree. This was my experience. This was pre Best Buy era. Yeah, which is very recent. Yes. Okay, the next story is related to this. New research shows that gay and lesbian couples tend to have a higher quality relationships than their heterosexual counterparts. Relative to heterosexual relationships, same-sex relationships tend to have more equitable domestic work arrangements, less defined gender roles, and a greater sense of social connectedness to a community. They believe these findings suggest heterosexual couples

could in fact learn something from gay and lesbian couples. Further knowledge of the strategies developed by gay and lesbian couples to maintain their relationship quality despite individual and institutional discrimination could help to develop new counseling tools. You know what, when you were reading that headline, all the things in that article that were mentioned,

like the gender roles, equitability, I was thinking, I think that that would be better in a same-sex couple, because in heteronormative relationships, there are such gender roles baked in the cake. And so I think that's interesting and it seems like it's true. It's just common sense. True. Here's what I think we do. Okay. We just start ban straight marriage. Maybe we should do a build a ban straight marriage. Just we just, I mean, just ban straight marriage. Everything MAGA wants, we just go the complete opposite

and just flood the zone with it. Everybody knows about our toddler advocacy program where we're advocating for toddler safety and have basically found two places which they are safe which is home and school. Outside of that, you can't take your toddler anyway. No, you're at home. So, I think these straight marriages are a minefield of toxic, really bad breeding grounds for bad things to happen. And so, I think we should just ban straight marriages. I think that's a great idea. I think we should take it one step further and say you cannot marry within your own race. Every marriage has to be a mixed-race marriage.

I love that. I mean, I think that would open a lot of eyes and appreciation of diversity. Yeah. But I think that should only be for white people. Completely agree. Yeah. One hundred percent agree. No white on white marriage. No white on white marriage. We want to ban straight white on white marriage. No white on white marriage. We want to ban straight white on white marriage.

It's just a breeding ground and hotbed for bad ideas. That potentially leads to MAGA. Right. If there's even a chance you're going to be led to MAGA, we have to stop it before it starts. We're going to ban it. Yeah. Ban white on white heterosexual marriage.

Kylie, what do you think about that? I'm 100% on board. Yeah. I genuinely think, like, think about just in I'm 100% on board. Yeah. I genuinely think like think about just in Oklahoma. How many how many problems that could solve? I'll tell you all a story. So Oklahoma listener is the buckle of the Bible belt. And this is just the truth, the more evangelical groups of white people are the more racist they are. And so about, what, 15 years ago, we get the Oklahoma City Thunder. And they trot out all these hot African American basketball players.

There's this one player in particular named Serge Ibaka, who is just, I mean, he would look good sitting in the barrel of a loaded shotgun. And then this image gets kind of leaked all online and he's in these gym shorts, but you can see his penis. And let me just say, size queen pumps approved it and brings it up still decades later. We were just passing the picture around at the Knicks games. We were shown our friend that we went to the game with from New York. He was like, no way. It's just, it's unbelievable. Yeah. So anyway, my point is that once this team rolled in, Josh Welch, all the women in Oklahoma City were super excited to go to games, were wearing Thunder

Merch. They were all in on NBA basketball. And Josh Welch said to me, well, I don't think anything has combated racism as much in Oklahoma City as the Oklahoma City thunder rolling out here with all these hot black basketball player men, because all these white women were all of a sudden, huge, huge, huge thunder fans. And it wasn't just like, oh, I love to go to the games. It was like, oh my God, I love to go to the games and those players are hot.

I mean, it was like, it was like a cougar moment, but it genuinely, I think Josh had a very astute point. It genuinely helped with the issue of race because so many white people are still so segregated in white culture and completely around white people they are never around or mixed with black people and so that NBA move has been very beneficial. Now it didn't help anything in the state as far as voting goes. Right, nobody got smarter but I will say this people that live in like on the East Coast or metropolitan areas, you have to understand you can live in Oklahoma.

And if there are certain places you live, there is not one foreign language. There's not one person of color. I mean, it is like sitting in a glass of milk all day, every day. There's just zero co-mingling of different cultures. No diversity. None. I'm gonna tell you this, no diversity and no culture, period. Except church. There is no culture.

I mean, there is just none, zero. And so I think when the NBA rolled into Oklahoma City, NBA, when these players roll out and they're playing hip hop music and you get this flavor of black culture and people like it, they do. People, when you are in more diverse cultures, I think you're, like, I always imagine when we go to New York and you just walk

down the street, you hear multiple different languages, every skin color, and everybody's just kind of like peacefully walking about. And here, every time we get back and we land, I'm always like, oh my God, this place is just so white. I'm so grateful that my sons have a lot because of their basketball and AAU, that they have a lot of really close, you know, black friends and- And exposure. Josh and I have become friends with their parents and that has infinitely made our lives better.

That diversity in our life has made our lives so much better. Okay, I believe today that we are going to hear from you, listener. Kylie, play our first clip. Okay, up first we've got Carolyn. Hey guys, I have had it with people who don't do their job but still collect a paycheck. Say, for instance, my two Texas senators up in Washington. They're not doing a damn thing up there. And I get it, you're disabled. You lost your balls.

You have no ability to stand up to the big orange guy. Just take the disability check and stop collecting a real paycheck. Cause you aren't clearly doing the job. When you get your balls back, then you can collect your paycheck until then. Go on disability like the rest of them. I totally agree with her. The castration of white MAGA men in the face of Donald Trump is I have never seen such an emasculation, castration situation ever in all 50 years of my life. I have never seen such

obsequiousness to such a disgusting, unmanly person as Donald Trump. Well, and not only that, they are so emasculated, lay down so flatly for this man and his ideals, yet they wanna tell you how masculine they are. It's just, I mean, I know it's probably insecurity and I know it's projection, but it's like, you are the worst, you fucking suck, you have no balls, and you sit around and insecurity and I know it's projection, but it's like, you are the worst. You fucking suck.

You have no balls and you sit around and tell us how many balls you have, which it's so gross the whole thing. Totally agree. Who's next? Okay. Next we've got Matthew. Pussy pumps, Juicy Jen, Catherine. Ladies, it's Matt.

Can we talk about how this is really pressing? In Trump's America, it seems as though nobody can admit they're unemployed if that's your situation and I've been noticing this for quite some time Like these stay-at-home moms these trad wives like oh, you know, I'm a home director. I'm a freelance artist I make bedazzled diapers for babies to shit in like no mama. You're actually just unemployed in the home that you own Yeah, I know. I'm sorry, but that's the truth, you know? You're unemployed in the home that you own. Or I have a coworker and I see his social media, I follow it and it says, art director. Babe, you're not directing jack shit and I'm sorry that I have to be the first one to tell

you that, but I don't know what this whole facade is with like being unemployed and like, oh, I do this, I do that. And it's like, I need to see your tax record, babe. If we're going to go around marching about that, like we need to pull up, let's call the IRS and let's get it figured out and settled once and for all. Cause I think it's kind of fake fucking news. And I hate to use that term because I know that's a Trumpy term, but this is really fake fucking news.

I love Matt and he brings up a really good point because right now there is this, you know, they're obviously slashing all sorts of government jobs. And you have Marjorie Taylor Greene up there saying, get a real job, go work, blah, blah, blah, blah. When a lot of these fucking trad wives that are, you know, collecting Stanley caps and maga shit, they're unemployed too. Yeah, and calling themselves home director. Now that was a new one on me, home director. And here's the thing, people get real pissed off about us when we talk about this. If you get to stay home with your kids, and that's what you want to do, it's a free country for now, swing for the fences.

I don't give a shit, but don't try to equate that luxury of being able to stay at home with your kids when you have people that have to work and be a mom at the same time. Then you have two jobs. Just at least acknowledge that during the hours of 8 a.m. to 3 30 p.m. you don't have jack shit to do. You know? I mean like I'll go play tennis on my lunch hour and I see these women and they don't they're per mat unemployed and good for them I'm not jealous but like they're dicking off it's like yoga then they go play tennis and they're going to get a facial they might go do a round of laundry and then they're going to carpool. Well for me it's like I race off go to tennis on my lunch hour and race back, and then would have to go to carpool.

And I mean, it's more difficult. It's just a lot more difficult when your income is necessary for your children to have a roof over their head and for them to eat. Right. And a lot of women have like two jobs. They have to do all the things with two jobs. And the tradwife thing, for me, it's dangerous. Like you're putting women in a situation that's untenable

and that puts them at such a compromise financially and at the mercy of whomever is financially in charge. I mean, and having been one of those women that stayed home and was put under huge financial hardship, having to restart your career and having no money and having just to completely start over, I could kick myself over that. And I just, so maybe my perspective is too hard on that, but I always think watch the fuck out because the other shoe is going to drop at some point.

I don't think your perspective is too hard. I think your perspective is helpful and needs to be echoed more and more. You were a divorce lawyer. You yourself fell prey to this bullshit that, oh, I'm just going to be a stay at home wife. And what you do is you give up any form of autonomy and then you allow for any sort of abuses. You have to acquiesce to them because your acquiescence becomes your job so that your kids are fed and you have a roof over your head now. Are all husbands who have stay at home wives abusive? No, but there's enough for this to be pointed out and shouted from

the rooftops because women find themselves in compromising positions time and time again. And I, you know this better than anybody because of your divorce law practice. And it's just, I see so many friends when you get to be my pump sage, so many friends who have downright abusive husbands. I'm not talking about physical. Of course that exists too. But I've seen this where it's horrible emotional abuse. The husbands are total pussy chasers out all the time. The husbands are total alcoholics, put their wives on a budget, and the wife knows that if she divorces him, then he's going to go nuclear punitive and not give her assent, drag it out in court, and then it ends up punishing the kids more. So oftentimes, women, these

trad wives, sacrifice themselves so their husbands can be MAGA pieces of shit. Right. Right. The financial abuse is every bit as difficult and dangerous as any other type of abuse. Listener, do you want the fastest working GLP-1s for half the list price? Our sponsor, Roe, has got you. Are you ready to lose an average of 15% of your weight faster?

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and when paying cash without applying insurance or savings cards. Pumps, as you know, I play tennis and pickleball every single day at lunch and my feet and hands sweat so much. And I'm like, what do you do about this? Like sweaty feet, sweaty hands. Thankfully, Lume, they have this all over body deodorant and I rub like what do you do about this? Like sweaty feet, sweaty hands. Thankfully, Lume, they have this all-over body deodorant and I rub it on my hands, I rub it on my feet. It's a total game changer. This might be TMI but I use it under my boobs and in my butt crack, the all-over deodorant, and then after I work out I use the wipes and I'm completely confident going back to work anytime I work out during the day. Listener, want to try America's number one

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Hi ladies, my name's Isaac. I love you Jen. I love you pumps. Kathy, love you too. Listen, I have completely fucking had it with the Democrats. Now don't get me wrong, there is nothing worse than a Republican. But why are you sending me 326 messages about this petition and this contribution and this and that all to get me to send you money when I haven't heard not one of you call Donald Trump

and MAGA Nazis. That is what it is. And yet I haven't heard a single one of you say it. So when you call them out for what they are and you start calling it what it is, I'll send you some money. But until then, leave me the fuck alone. Get off my goddamn phone.

Isaac, this message needs to make its way inside the Beltway, because what the Democratic power players right now are missing, what they're totally missing with this kind of a little bit of spice here, a little bit of bipartisanship here. What they're missing is part of the reason that Donald Trump won is because he's a fighter. He was like, fuck them, we're going to do this, even though it's all crazy batshit stuff. This milk toast approach is so awful. And I 100% agree with Isaac if you had at least 10

senators and 10 Congress people that came out and held a massive press conference where they called Elon Musk a Nazi, where they called Donald Trump a Nazi, where he called him racist, where they said they're anti-American, where they said they're colluding with Russia and they're dismantling democracy and we need money to fight this and we are gonna to go full tilt, hard in the paint. The money would flood in like nobody's business, but it is a disjointed message and nobody. Now there are some AOC, Jasmine Crockett, Chris Murphy, and Bernie Sanders, always consistently, but that is missing. It is completely missing.

They are not equal to this moment and it is heartbreaking. I completely agree with Isaac. I've had that exact same thought. I get a text every day. I shouldn't subscribe, but I don't because I'm like, well, I don't want to miss something. And I think I thought exactly what he thought like two nights ago. Like, if you do fucking something, if I hear you out there, screaming the truth and spitting facts at the highest octave you can, then I'm going to be more

inclined, but until then, I'm going to sit back. So Isaac's onto something he needs to call the DNC. What they want is what we want is a fighter that's authentic, that isn't just so worried about the next election, that can acknowledge what we're all seeing, which is a total attempt by what I believe to be Russia to completely take over and dismantle the United States of America, which has been Vladimir Putin's goal for a couple of decades. And he is winning. And the Democrats, if they had a, if they said, here's the date, here's the time, here's the March, here's the money that we need, these guys are Nazis, they're anti-American and they just said all the shit that we're

witnessing, everybody would be on board with it. But I mean, I heard Hakeem Jeffries on a podcast the other day say something to the extent that, I don't bend my knee to the far left or the far right. It's like, motherfucker, that is the biggest false equivalency on the planet. All right, the far right are goddamn Nazis doing sick, hails. Everybody sees it, I guess, except for you, Hakeem.

Yeah, I have been extremely disappointed with the leadership over in the United States Congress. It has been milk toast, to say the least. And again, we pointed out all the time, the most vocal, other than Bernie Sanders, are women. Yep. Elizabeth Warren has been pretty, yep, she's been vocal, but it's just like, it's the women, the men are just pussyfooting around. It's pathetic and it makes you not want to send them money because they are not acknowledging what your eyes and ears are seeing. Right. And then it makes you think, are they in on it? And that's a horrible position for them to be in. But I think what happens with a lot of these politicians is they get inside the beltway and somebody's a horrible position for them to be in. But I think what happens with a lot of these

politicians is they get inside the beltway and somebody runs a poll and they're like, oh, we should move to the center. And like dipshit, that's why Kamala lost because she started running around with Liz Cheney when she was calling him weird all the time. And on the attack, she was ahead in the polls. Like this is not the time to play politics. This is the time to stand up for principle, to call a Nazi a Nazi, to call a racist a racist, to call a homophobe a homophobe. And if you can't do it, sit the fuck down and let somebody else rise up. I mean, Hakeem, if you can't do it, then let Jasmine Crockett or AOC do it. Because I guarantee you they'd have this whole thing whipped into shape in a no time. But that is just, it is abysmal.

It is dangerous. And he is, if he thinks he needs to run to the center, we will never, ever, ever, ever win a race ever again, because that is not what this moment is about. This moment is about standing up for democracy, calling a Nazi a Nazi, standing up for human rights, standing up for decency. And you're not going to do it by trying to use false equivalencies to appeal to this elusive undecided center voter. Right. Give me a break. Give me a break.

And listen up, Democrats. We're sitting here in the middle of a red state and how Pumps and I feel and how Isaac feels, that's not happening in a vacuum. Every single one of my girlfriends might be somewhat moderate, but they want that fight. They want to hear a Democrat call a Nazi a Nazi. And the support you guys would get would be overwhelming, but for some goddamn reason, nobody has the balls to do it. And it's just devastating. Yeah, it is disheartening. All right, next.

All right, up next, we've got a joint one from some Patreon members. Ooh, this is exciting. Good morning, Pumps, Jen, and Kathy. This is is Emily LeBuff. We met in New York. I'm the tall one. Anyhow, Gary and I were discussing on Instagram about Donald Trump's signature. We have both had it with that signature. We both agree that it looks like what Trump's EKG reading probably looks like. I think being a nurse, it looks like VTAC, which means ventricular tachycardia, and it's real bad.

It's like you're doing chest compressions if someone's got VTAC. So I've had it. Grow up and sign your name with a pen like a grownup. That's such a great point. I completely agree. He signs his name with a Sharpie. Like you can't just use a pen. But you know what I'm gonna say. When I see his signature, I think somebody's overcompensating for something, making it way too big.

Okay, here's, let me tell you guys what this whole signature thing is. The other day Pumps and I were sitting here waiting on Kylie to get our camera equipment ready and we're sitting at this here very table and we had paper and pens in front of us and I wrote my signature Jennifer Welch. And when you are in junior high and high school, you write your signature, you practice it all the time. You know, it's just like, it's something that at least we did because we didn't have cell phones. Right, and we had cursive.

And so then Pumps takes it and she writes, Angie, what was the last name? Clooney. Yeah, Angie Clooney. And then she said, did you ever do that where you practiced like you were gonna marry? And then I wrote Jennifer Obama. And then Pumps, you wrote somebody else.

Beaver, Chestnut. Chestnut. Angie Chestnut. Angie Chestnut. And so the fact that he sits around and preps Beaver. Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha That's what we have to start calling you now. Hi, welcome to I've had it. I'm Angie Beaver.

What about if you're Angie D. Beaver? Do you know what the D is for? Down beaver? Dry. Ha ha ha! It's me, Mom, Miss Curtin Dry Beaver Law. Angie D. Beaver. Angie D. Beaver.

Attorney at law. Magus layer. America's top DEI podcaster, Angela D. Beaver. The dawning of a beaver. Oh my God. You can tell we're middle school all over again. Going back to talking about our signature again, it brings out our immaturity. But anyway, it reminds me when he does that, that that's what I used to do in junior high. When I was a cheerleader and we're heading to an away game, because we had pads and paper

because we didn't have cell phones, I'd practice my signature and put down like Jennifer Cruz for Tom Cruise, you know, these people I thought I was going to marry. And Donald Trump sits there and practices his signature and then he holds it up. And it's like, this is juvenile stuff. And I admit that we just engaged in a ton of juvenile behavior, but Angela D. Beaver made me do it. And here's the deal, we're not the President of the United States. We're not the President of the United States, we're just America's top DEI podcasters. Right. That's expected.

Yeah. All right. Last one, Kylie. Okay, the last one is from Skyler. Miss Welch, pumpity pumps are probably your social media manager because you're so famous now. I don't know if real people submit what they've had it with or where we can do that, because you're so famous now. I don't know if real people submit what they've had it with or where we can do that. But I just have to get this off my chest

because you know what I've had it with? Walkers. Walkers with a cause or a purpose. Like you see these people post on social media, I'm gonna walk from one end of Montana to the other in the name of bias and awareness. Nobody cares, Me especially. Start walking. There's the door. No one's stopping you. Go for it. These people have nothing

better to do and they think they're doing something. I've just had it. Okay, here's what I'm going to say. This is he brings up a really good point. It's a nuance. It's a nuanced grievance because like we should be walking right like cars were not in the cards for what our bodies were evolved to be. And so then we're taking things like drinking water and making it performative. Walking which is the number one way that human beings would get from point A to point B and we make it performative. And I agree with him, we're normalizing things that should just be foregone conclusions.

Right. The walking for bison got me because you know where immediately my head went. To your beaver? We're walking for beavers. We're going to have a beaver walk. Beavers for democracy. Beavers against Nazis. How about, could Angela D be for Angela democracy beaver? It can be, but I really like the dry. Dry beaver. I just, I think that we could do a beaver walk for democracy. Beaver trot.

The beaver crawl against fascism. This is completely... Yes, we're going to organize a beaver walk for democracy. Well, I'll tell you what, it's a better idea than I've heard out of democratic leadership lately. Preach. At least we have an idea. At least we have an idea. We have a mascot. Well, I'll tell you what, it's a better idea than I've heard out of Democratic leadership lately. Preach. At least we have an idea.

At least we have an idea. We have a mascot. We have a cacaw. The beaver. You know what? You could have the beaver. We could get a beaver. We could call one of those animal sanctuaries.

Okay. She tried to do this with an eagle and I was like, they're not gonna let us rent an eagle. Well, we could. It's America still. I mean, there's- But I mean, I just don't, I don't- Okay.

What about a beaver? That's what I just said. No, I know, but I'm just wondering, a beaver rescue? I don't know. Okay, so for those of you that want to leave a voice memo to be featured on this here podcast, you go to Instagram and you record the voice memo and Instagram and then you DM it to I'veHadItPodcast. And if you think you have a banger and it gets passed over, just keep resending it and

putting it up to the top because we get a lot. And when Kylie and Seth go in there, they have to find them. But anyway, here's what you can do for us. Subscribe, follow us, join our sub stack, join our Patreon, get a beaver and pumps. Tell them. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday, every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America always served with a side of petty grievances. We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever, you can get your

podcasts and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe and review so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind, Pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Cacaw! A little bit eagle say? Cacaw. A little bit more enthusiasm. Cacaw. That's it.

That's, that's, Cacaw. That's the patriotism that this country means right there.