I've Had It - Big Feelings, Little Men

Episode Date: February 5, 2026

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So are we supposed to start the podcast? Ready, one, two, three. Patriots, gay triots, they triots, black triots, brown triots, all the maga, ice lovers, hateful sociopaths that are trying to tear this country down can do what pamps? I think I'm going to start doing fuck off with the bird. That's a good one. I like it. I like it. The ever-evolving fuck off. Yes. So what have you had it with?

Okay. What I've had it with is, well, let me set it up. I've had it with not being able to get my colors done. All over the internet, everyone I know is talking about how good their color is once they've had their colors done. What colors? You know, like they tell you, are you a spring? Are you a winter?

Are you a fall? And if you're a spring, you wear these colors. And if you're a fall, you wear these colors. And I believe it works. I 100% believe it works. works. I have emailed like six different people to do it. And I can't get anybody to email me back. The one girl that emailed me back was $550. And I was just like, that's too much. So what I've had it with are trends that I actually want to be a part of on social media. And I cannot be a part of it.

So I hate being outside, being cool when I'm at least trying a little bit. Okay. I have a lot to say about this. This is a resurrected thing from the 1980s. And there was a book called Color Me Beautiful. And my mother, Linda, was all about this. And you can go, I'm sure, onto eBay or somewhere and buy the book, Color Me Beautiful. And you can do your colors yourself.

And this was before the smartphone devices when we would go shopping in the 80s, which my mother would always go to the mall because she'd say, well, darling, I like to get a little exercise too. So we were always at the mall and she would have in her purse the color me beautiful book. And so if I wanted to buy something, she would, I was a summer. I am a summer. And my mother would whip out the book and she'd go, I'm sorry, honey, that's not your color because it had all of the colors on it. I think you're probably a spring. It's been years and years since I'd like to color me beautiful book, but color me beautiful. worldwide web. Okay. I'll just charge you 50 bucks, not the $550. That's fair. When it comes in,

I'll even, I'll sit down with you. I'll do your colors, but this is a resurrected stolen thing from the 1980s. Somebody's acting like they discovered. And I just want to shout out to my mom, Linda, who watches the pod, Trailblazer. Yes. Because I had my colors done when I was just barely off the teat. I was in grade school. And my mother diagnosed me as a summer. We went shopping accordingly and I bought the clothes accordingly, lived by it my whole life. All of these people catching on decades and decades later with these racket, $550, you can't get an appointment. I'll do it for you. We're going to order color.

Okay. Thank you. I remember. I knew that it had been recycled because I remember people knew what their colors were a long time ago, but I never had mine done so I didn't know. So I have not one bit shocked that Linda was on the cutting edge. And thank you. I'll take you up on that. Yeah. Kylie, can you Google and find us an image of Color Me Beautiful, the book? It was kind of, you know, my mother was an atheist, so we didn't really have the Bible in the house.

Color Me Beautiful was opened up all the time, like a Southern Baptist goes to church. She was all in on it. Vanity took a front row seat at the household growing up. I'm kind of jealous you've had it your whole life. because I'm kind of afraid what my closet's going to be like everything in my closet is going to be the wrong color. Here's the deal too. Like I also just sometimes hold something up when I'm in a store. And if I think it looks good on me, that's all I cared.

And it might not have been my color, but, you know, all this shit's a wreck. There it is. That's color beautiful. Carol Jackson. That was the Bible in my house. This book went with us everywhere. everywhere this book went with us. That is it. Discover your natural beauty through the colors that make you look great and feel fabulous. Whatever your style mood, you'll glow in your thirsty

special colors, color me beautiful. This was it. This was, this was the Bible. While you were going to Bible study, talking about hell and demons torturing you, this is what my mom and I were doing. And just feeding capitalism. My mother and I were not doing premarital sex. No, I was saying I was talking about premarital sex while you were doing colors. Yes. Yes. Yes. Yes.

Yes. All right. Let me tell you what I've had it with. Moderates. I've done this before, but I think it's time to resurrect it. It's time. Just like somebody who right now is like, you know, I think both sides is just crazy. I'm just down the middle.

I just want something normal. And I'm like, okay, number one, quit being a pussy. Number two, pick a side. Number three, stand for something. And number four, quit contributing to this narrative of this being a fault, of allowing this to be a false equivalency, giving a permission structure. Because this is not wanting equality for all is not parallel with what they're doing right now.

Those are not two different sides. One side wants equality for people. embraces multiculturalism, embraces economic development, wants everybody to pay their fair share and taxes. Another side is for recreational cruelty, sucking up to billionaires, lying and saying immigrants are taking your jobs while it's really the billionaires that are making all the mass firings and replacing everybody's jobs with robots. And so it's just like this is not the time to try to pretend like you're this reasonable, rational person. Because any stance, that isn't, I oppose this regime with everything in me is irrational and unreasonable.

There is no, like, I think the whole idea of like moderate is something that's like made up to try to placate to conservatives, like, because it still has so much footing in conservative politics being a moderate does. And instead, then it branches like people who care about equality, is somehow that's some radical thing or income inequality, like caring about that as a radical thing, saying that billionaires need to pay a billionaire tax, which will affect their life 0% and then they all act like they are oppressed victims. And then you've got people that are like, I love capitalism, but they have zero capital who defend these billionaires. Right. You know what I mean? Somebody's making like 50, 60 grand a year is like going to go to bat,

to make sure that some asshole billionaire named Peter Thiel, who's an evil demon queen who has a side hustle of giving lectures about the anti-crise, doesn't pay more in taxes. And here's the thing. It won't affect his life at all. If he paid more in taxes, it would affect, do so much goodness for our country. But it's just crazy. I've had it with them. I completely agree.

I just want to just for our newer listeners that haven't been in since the jump, I want to tell a story about one of our live shows. One time in the podcast, Jennifer got a review that called her a centrist. She doesn't get met. You can call her anything on the planet. She doesn't give shit. Nope. Zero fucks to give. This review called her a centrist. And I mean, she was fired up. Matter for months. For months. For months. I couldn't let it go. Fast forward to a live show in Memphis, Tennessee, I'll never forget it. And two of our gate triates. Nashville. Nashville.

Oh, what I said. We haven't done. Have we done a live show in Memphis? No, it was Nashville. You're 100% right. It was Nashville. In Nashville, they bring her a shirt that says centrist, she gets wound up all over again. These two fucking hot queens, just hot gay men too, just, you know, and they thought it was I go, fuck you guys. And they'd just been over dying laughing. It's the best troll on the planet.

It was so funny. Yeah. That thing fires her up more than calling her a centrist. Yeah. It occupied a lot of real estate in my brain for a long time. But here's the thing that people have to understand about, like, political gradation. So in Oklahoma, I was a liberal, which to the people around me, they translated. as like a radical communist.

And I wasn't as progressive as I've become. I've become more progressive. And I've been super liberal my whole life, but I've become more progressive. I would say more deprogrammed to corporate propaganda from the Democratic Party and corporate news. But still, like it's interesting because like coming up to New York up here, they're like, we can't see Kathy Hockel. And I'm like, that's so sweet that y'all don't like your Democratic governor.

She lets you have abortion and she, you know, tries to do things. And it's so darling that they're so mad. And then like there's primaries that are going to happen at midterms. And it's like one Democrat against another Democrat. And in our state, it's like, I mean, they are wound up about Sharia law in the state of Oklahoma. And I just want to tell you there's barely a Muslim population. It is the most cracker-ass, cracker white, salting. shit. They have, there's the east side of Oklahoma City. Oklahoma City is still very segregated.

And they, it's like, it's so regressive. And so if you're like even, even slightly center left, comparatively, they think you are like this radical Shiite liberal that is trying to put Sharia law into everything. It's crazy. But it did offend me. I still, I could still. I still. I was offended by that. Okay, I just remember this when you said that. So I get a text the other day. Of course, it takes me forever to find it because of the stupid update. And it is the Oklahoma County Election Board asking me if I would be interested in running for office.

They need Democrats to run for office. Oh, fuck. Can you imagine? Can you, there's a, okay, there's this commercial of a guy that's running for governor in Oklahoma. I don't know, some nut. And of course his whole platform is anti-trans. All right. And so on this commercial, he like cuts a banana.

Yeah, like he makes a knife and cuts a banana and the inferences like, you know, whack and weaners. And it's like that's why when I'm in New York and people are like, we've got a primary Kathy Hokel. I'm like, you're darling. So sweet that we're having such a rational conversation about is she too big? of a corporate damage. It's so realistic, it's so rooted in reality. And then you get to these red states in the exact same country. And it's Sharia law, wiener-whacking, nutball, crazy town shit while all these Republicans do is just lie to their uber religious cult base. And the

and the cult base just laps it up. We need to fight for Elon Musk. He's oppressed. All right, let's do it. Let's get an army together. Let's do it. Mm-hmm. All right, welcome to I've had it, America's Top DEI podcast. I'm Jennifer and I'm not a centrist. I'm Angie, HBIC, head beaver in charge and chief, penile shamer in chief. Oh, God, that last episode that we did was so therapeutic pumps. I agree. And I just thought it's been a, I want to be a peep. I like it. I know. I know. And here's the thing. Like we're dark woke now, not woke. And so if somebody says, I think it's inappropriate and you guys are not true progressives because you're shaming penises, then I'm going to say tough titties.

And they're going to say you shouldn't use titty in that reference. And I'm going to say double tough titty. Titty twistered. Doubling down. Yeah, because it's just like this is just quit policing each other. If we all agree, Trump's a nut, let's just power through. And if it makes us feel better in the interim to talk about the fact that in our opinion, we have diagnosed Stephen Miller. with an inverted penis that looks like a vagina, then that's just something that needs to be shared with our listeners because it feels good to say that. Yeah, especially the way he acts.

Yeah. I would say this. Every most women that I know are far more pulled together and less hysterical than Stephen Miller. So a vagina might do him some good. Agree. 100% agree. He is so hysterical that it's just unbelievable. And he's so submissive. I mean, it's just such a submissive little twat. All right. Let's check in with Kylie, the chief lesbian of the United States of America. Hi. I'm also not a centrist and pumps. I've bad news. I got that text as well. And I responded and said, I'll do it. So I think we're running against each other for Oklahoma, a congressperson or something. that's it that's what they are for democracy guys that's tough times they're randomly

robotexting people saying anyone beeler anyone anyone anyone will run for office somebody's probably all licker it up like let's just robotext it yeah fuck it okay I've got some reviews for you this one is five stars it is amazing It's titled Review of the Podcast, and Cheryl writes. These women are mentioned a lot on Fox News. So I go listen now, and I expect a disaster, but the way they look, but they look way better than I thought. The Botox is a little distracting sometimes, but overall, they look pretty good and definitely

not how they were described. I don't agree with anything they say in the politics, but I give five stars to be honest, since I do watch more in a hate watching way, but they are funny to me and I laugh sometimes, at them and with them. Just being honest, they deserve it if I keep watching, but entertaining sometimes, thank you. Thank you. Cheryl Belcourt, I would just like to say thank you for that. That's it. That level of honesty is very rare in conservative circles to just say, you know what, they're both hogs, which we're both guilty of. Why do you think we crank out so much content? that somebody's got to pay for this shit.

Right. It's jarring. But they're not like the hammered dog shit that Jesse Waters claims they are. And I laugh from time to time. I hate watching them in general. They're morons. But, you know, I put my time in here. And so I'm going to give them a five stars.

So Cheryl, kudos to you. And I just want you to know, we're saving you a seat over in the anti-cult party. And I just think you should just keep listening a little bit, Cheryl. Just keep listening. Cheryl seems to me to be resistance, curious a little bit. So good for her. Good on her. And thank you for the review. I wonder if she could run. And as a moderate, she would be considered a liberal. I bet they would take her. I'm pretty long. Go ahead. The left, the most liberal candidates I've gotten to vote for in the last couple

Oklahoma elections are just Republicans that are running as Democrats so that we could beat the other person. Like that's as liberal as it gets on a high level. It's insane. It is so insane. People don't realize how insane state politics are in places like Oklahoma. And it's just the insanity of how the number one goal is who can out crazy the other one. And the maga shit that y'all are seeing it that's happening nationally long before Trump descended from the escalators, this has been happening in red states. This level of. crazy town politics is not new in the least bit. They have been this bat shit crazy and mentally deranged long before Trump. Okay, I've got another five-star review. This is from Jules and it's titled The Only Thing That's Worked on My Mom. She says, I'm in love with this podcast. Not only does it feel like therapy for me while fascism spreads across our country, listening to you both dissect what has been going wrong in our politics like two friends gossiping about a partner underperforming in

bed has been so helpful in making my mom finally understand my opinion slash criticisms of the Democratic Party. She's now open to Democratic socialism in part from your podcast. You have such excellent guest. It's an easy podcast to a boomer white lady who voted for Hillary and not Bernie. The fact that you both admit that you've been on a political journey for the last decade is something people can resonate with. And overall, it just gives me hope. Keep up the good work. I'm now an evangelical spreading your words and podcast to everyone who will listen. That makes me happy. I mean, we're pretty awesome.

They just review after review after review, even the haters. Even the haters. We look better than they thought. You know, to our newer listeners, this is something that is hilarious. So we go on tour and are people that help us set it up. They're like, we want to put you on tour. And we're like, nobody will show up. They're like, you might be surprised.

So we were surprised. We go on tour and we would have these like VIP meet and greets. And then every single person that came up to do this would see us. And they would go, oh my God, you guys look great. You look so much better in person. And then it was like person after person. City after city, venue after venue, time and time and time again. So what I have to say to all of our listeners, viewers right now, it only gets better from here.

We're going up. We're setting expectations. Even the haters confirm it. We don't look near as shitty in real life as we do right here right now. Naturally, we blamed Kylie for looking like shit on TV. She had to have put some terrible filter on us. Still has it, obviously. Okay, I also want to give a quick update from our last episode on Melania's documentary that we covered.

Oh, yeah. It is expected to lose over $70 million at the box office. It's projected to earn around $3 million, and the film costs roughly $75 million for, I believe, like Jeff Bezos, right? Isn't that who front today? Yeah. I just thought that was a good little. update. It's beautiful. Here's my thing. When I'm going through social media now, there's just so much content about how shitty this documentary is. And I just, it's like I want to bathe in it. I don't

want to get out of it. Let me ask you this. Let me ask you this. If you could go see it, you didn't have to pay any money and you could be in full blown incognito in the theater. Would you do it? I kind of think I would. I'm giving some real thought. Right? But like you could never be seen. there but like buying a ticket to a different movie because I do not want one dollar I don't want one streaming minute going to it I don't want dollar but I I have given a lot of thought buying a ticket to a different one sneaking into Melania just because I'm sure watch yeah to hate watch like Cheryl hate watches us yes but I'm

not gonna be nice and pragmatic as Cheryl though yeah that's why that's why that's why I think we got to run Cheryl in a red state gal. Yeah. No, I've thought about it. But then you know, here's the thing. Here's exactly what happened. We sneak in and then it starts and then like five, 10 minutes into it, you're just like, this is inseparable. Just like when you see her on Fox News and she's like, my husband is an unifier. My husband unifies people in the country and we don't want the violence in the street. And I speak eight languages and I've lived in America and fuck the Christmas. My girlfriend and I quote her Christmas book reading all the time in our house.

Does Santa see in the dark? Does he wear night vision goggles? That was so bad. It's so funny. I haven't been right. As a parent, you want to teach your children to avoid the mistakes that you made as a young person. And I have found the way to do that. And that is with chime.

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Head to chime.com slash had it. That is chime.com slash had it. It only takes a few minutes to sign up, and I've had it podcast listeners can earn up to an extra $350. Chime is a financial technology company, not a bank. Banking services and the secured Chime Visa credit card are provided by the Bank or Stride Bank, N.A. Optional services and products may have fees or charges.

See chime.com. slash fees info. Terms apply. Limited time only. Must open the new account and complete qualifying activities to earn rewards. Advertised annual percentage yield with Chime Plus status only. Otherwise 1% APY applies. No minimum balance required. Chime card on time payment history may have a positive impact on your credit score. Results may vary. See chime.com for details on applicable terms. All right, listener, long work weeks and busy weekends, leave me feeling and looking so incredibly depleted. That's why I've discovered, and I'm dying to share with you all, prolons, five-day fasting, mimicking diet because it works at the cellular level.

to reset and rejuvenate you from the inside out, supporting sustained fat loss, lean muscle, metabolism, slower aging, which really interests me, and even glowing skin. We've all set health goals to lose weight, exercise more, eat better, but without a plan, they often fade. That's why prolon is so helpful. It is a plant-based nutrition program featuring soups, snacks, and beverages designed to nourish the body while keeping it in a fasting state, triggering cellular rejuvenation and renewal. I'm so grateful that I introduced Prolon into my nutrition regimen. I'm already seeing great results. Ready for your own reset?

For a limited time, Prolon is offering, I've Had It listeners, 15% off sitewide, plus a $40 bonus gift when you subscribe to their five-day program. All you have to do is visit prolonlife.com slash had it. That's P-R-O-L-N-L-I-F-E.com slash had-it to claim your 15% discount and your bonus gift. Prolonlife.com slash had it. Okay, I've got a couple of news stories for you before we get to listener voice memos. I love this story. UK schools will introduce lessons to teach boys' respect for women and girls.

UK schools are set to introduce new lessons teaching boys the important. of respecting women and girls, this initiative is part of a broader effort to promote gender equality, challenge harmful stereotypes, and encourage positive behavior. The lessons address key issues such as consent, empathy, and equality with a focus in fostering mutual respect between genders from a young age. Love it. This is so important, I think. I really do. And you see, I think it was Norway. They have empathy classes in primary school, and it's the happiest place to live, the kindest place to live, you know, all of these things. I hate to say this, but I think this is what we're going to have to do because generationally we are seeing

less and less respect for women, less and less respect for other people, like the dehumanizing that's going on and that fact that there are people that are justifying it. I think that teaching empathy, teaching respect, I think that is really important. And I wish we as a country would get there. But again, that's after we solve all, you know, the gun problem. And maybe that would help with the gun problem. I don't know. But I just, I would really like to see something like that here. Who wants to volunteer to go tell the Christians? I will. Okay. They need to know. Because at the Christian schools, they teach the opposite of this. At the evangelical Christian schools, they teach Christian narcissism, women should submit very regressive things.

And I think that in raising children in general, we have to be really cognizant of especially what our children are engaging with on these devices. And I mean, I will just say like every couple months, I just do a little check on who my kids are following. I want to know who they're following. I want to know what they're, what part of pop culture they're tapping into. And my kids are at the age where I still think young adulthood is some of the most important times to parent because you're starting to separate from the family.

And I just want to make sure my kids, my boys know, like respecting other human beings and not being a participant in toxic online bro culture is so important. important to me is your mother that you are the person that defends the people, the marginalized people that the people in the brosphere are bullying. It's so incredibly important to me. And I think it just never stops. I mean, I think probably around like 30 or 35 possibly.

But I mean, I'll tell you what, if my boys were following somebody in this brosphere, it would be crawled up their ass and I would pull out a chair and sit there and park. I would make it so insufferable for them. They would want to cancel all of their social online stuff because it is just unacceptable to me. It is unacceptable to participate in a culture that props men up in the sense of faux masculinity where they all worship this weird sociopath.

And then just the constant both overt and covert diminishing of women that happens in these spaces. And I just, I just think it's so incredibly important and it should never stop. No, I agree with that. I think that generationally, we're seeing it more and more like out in the open. And again, I grew up in evangelical Christian where misogyny and internalized sexism. I grew up with that. I thought that was normal. You know, you have to really work at it.

And it's easy to lapse back into it. It's so easy. It's wild. you know, this is funny listeners, sometimes wanted to go to law school, which is a cool thing for your daughter doing her mom opposed it. Yeah, because being a teacher was a better helper job, which helper meant to my husband. And I just want to go on record. I fucking hate kids. Like, I barely liked my own. And so, you know, whatever. I hope to God, I hope to God that part right there.

there gets cut up and put on the five. And your parents are sitting at home, fucking free basing fox. It's always my face on their saying it. And I hope to God, I mean, Greg Gutfeld, Jesse Waters, please, with everything, I mean, please cut pumps saying I fucking hate kids. I barely like my own and put it on the five. I would pay a lot of money to watch your parents' reaction to that as they're sitting at home free basing Fox.

I would. I need that kind of entertainment right now. Yeah. That would be great. I was going to say this just kind of on that same sphere. I forgot to mention it to you. Okay, so with all the snow and people are iced in, kids can't go to school. I mean, I have never been happier that my kids are adults until a snow day comes. And then it's just an extra layer. When I got my roots done, two ladies had their little kids because there was no school. And I just was like, I'm so happy. My kids are grown because snow days were terrible back in the the day. I mean, they were just terrible. Do you remember what I did? I thought about it again. You have to tell it. It's so good.

Okay. So there's a horrible snowstorm, ice storm in Oklahoma and they come so infrequently and everybody is so incredibly ill-prepared, mentally, psychologically, the city. There's zero coping skills when this happens, zero. The entire place melts down. So all all the snow and ice comes. And the principal at my son's school was pretty good about like, listen, I'm not closing it down. Everybody freaks out over this. And so I'm on the phone.

She's like, my kid's school closed. I was like, not mine. My kid's school is not close. And I was always the first mom in carpool line. I was the first to drop off, the first to pick up, right? And so imagine that, me being that type A. Anyway. I'm sitting there waiting.

I'm on the phone with Angie and I'm like, well, nobody's here. And I said, you know what? They're probably running late because denial kicks in. I'm like, they're probably running late because of the snow. And then finally, and she's in the phone, she's like, you're fucked, you're fucked, you're going to be in kid jail all day with your kids. And I fucking love it. You deserve every bit of it.

You try to victory lap on me. I'm so glad this happened to you, which I deserved all of that for the record. And then finally, the security guard comes over and he bangs on my window. And he's like, ma'am, school is closed. today. She heard the whole thing and she's laughing just like she is there just enjoying every bit of it. I look in the backseat and I see my kids and they have like their little beanies on and they're both like in these like booster car seat things and I look in the rear mirror and I'm just like oh you need for them to be

at school today really bad so then we and then you just do this drive home I remember one-time pumps. It was a really bad ice storm and you said, why don't you come over to my house? And it's when you lived on that street, Whipperville. Yep. So I go over to Pumps House and the youngest of all five of our kids was my youngest son. And he was probably around like 18 months. Like we could put him in one of those, those, you know, those two, those circular things.

Extra shopper. Yeah, yeah, the saucer thing. And so I, I, I bring some wine and a couple packs of cigarettes, obviously. All right. So we pop open a bottle of wine at like noon, right? And we throw like, we have bubble bath going for some of the kids. We've got Cheetos and cartoons and just, I mean, just like A plus parenting out the wazoo.

Right. We're on the side of the house getting all liquored up smoking cigarettes. And then finally, our husbands get off work and we're like, hey, let's all have dinner over at the Olsons tonight. This will be really fun. where all the kids arrived in that was at one we decided to do that well the the husbands arrived around like 5 530 we are schnappered beyond all existence her youngest son luke is in the middle of the street and he has on one of those little like pajama things with the feet that zips up and josh my husband comes in he's got luke on his hip and he's like what the fuck is wrong with you guys look

was standing in the middle of the street. And it's speaking of we've wreak of cigarettes. We've each probably had a bottle of wine. I'm telling you, it is tough times during snowstorm. So shout out to all the young moms out there. Make sure if you get all liquored up, maybe smoke a girder or two in these snow days.

Just make sure your kids are inside. Right. Lock the door. Luke lived. He's great. He's thriving now. Everything's great. I think you know, he has more grids.

has more grit than your other two kids. I would say that was character developing. I did too. I think it was good for him. But Josh, and Josh doesn't get like mad like that. Never. He was livid, rightfully so. I mean, he's got Luke on in too.

We were hammered. That's a snow day. All right. Okay. You want to do some voice memos? Yes. I've got one from. a day.

Hello, Blesica, Madam Beaver, Kathy, and Kathy's bitch. I have had it with all of these, quote, unquote, tough guys, the gym bros, and these Maga Christian women watching heated rivalry for Blesicca and the Darning of a Beaver. This is a show and a book series about these really attractive gay hockey players. and all of these Maga Christian women who are physically conservative, socially liberal, and all these gym bros, you know, with the country clubbers,

watching this incredibly hot gay television series, and then having the whole audacity to turn the fuck around and vote against these people's rights. Just find it hilarious. Exploitative. Had it. Love it. Great points. And here's the thing. Everybody like, gay people are cool. Two gay men making out is hot. And if you're a straight guy and you're kind of like,

oh, that's kind of hot. Like when I've seen like lesbian scenes and the two women are really hot, I'm like, oh, that's hot. I'm not a lesbian. I don't want to make out with a woman, but I can objectively say, oh, that's kind of hot. And I think that's, these men, they see that and like, oh, they're pretty hot. And it's just all of this like Puritan culture buttoned up twats that are the worst about this shit and about the gym bros. I just want to say this. The testosterone types and the penile shrinkage that ensues, which pumps gave us a great scientific research on that last episode if you haven't heard it. I just think that there's a lot going on there. And if you look at like Joe Rogan, that's the kind of thing

I'm talking about. All right. What's your take on all that, Pumps? Okay, first of all, I loved he did rivalry. I thought the guys were so hot. And I personally, I thought it was hot. Like, I was like, okay, like I was watching with my daughter and I was like, oh my gosh, I feel weird watching this with you because I thought, I mean, I was like, I loved it. I thought it was so good. But I heard a bunch of people saying, well, it was just like pornography. I'm just like, well bitch how do you know if you haven't watched it obviously you have watched it you've watched it enough to watch the next one so obviously you liked it like it just i cannot have a president that says family values and fucks porn stars and the same people bitching about heated rivalry when the guys are hot and the story is sweet like i can't i'm done with all that have you seen all this shit all these parties that are going on at marlago and the women in like balls and and And I'm not a prude. I don't give a shit, but it's like they got, you know, floss up their ass and they're in these, like blow up balls on top of the swimming pool and in martini glasses.

And I always think about your parents when I see that because they're so prude and they're so wound up. Like if they saw that this is the type of party that they're having at Mar-a-Lago, how do they make that jump? That's the first point. And the second point is, and we haven't talked about this because there's been so much fuckery we haven't had time. There was a furry party. Yes, that's what I was just going to say. And here's the thing about the furries that happened in red states. So people that I know to be quote unquote moderates, aka pussies that want to admit their trumpers, would say to me, because there was this huge urban legend that happened a few years ago that furries were taking over high schools.

And children, because of the trans issue, it's opened up, it's a slippery slope, it's opened up the door, and now people are claiming identifying as cats. And that there were litter boxes in bathrooms where kids with furry hats on were going into the bathrooms, taking their hands, scratching like this, in a public restroom, in a box, and taking a shit like a cat in high school. So this went all over in Red State America. And this one guy that I know plays tennis with my husband, he was like, no, I mean, I know somebody at Jinks High School. And this is a suburb out of Tulsa, blah, blah, blah.

And I'm like, John, if somebody was taking a shit dressed as a cat in a high school, in the age of cell phones, there would be documentation of it, period. These kids do not take one half second step without their Snapchat. open. They just don't. It's it's impossible that there are these mass litter box shit incidents in high schools, but it was all linked to the furries and all of the MAGA, all of the Q&ON, all of the Fox Newsers were super anti-fury. And then Trump, because these people don't fucking believe in anything, then they want to be furries and then he has a furry party. Yeah. I don't know what was going on with the bathrooms if they had litter boxes in there,

but it wouldn't surprise me. It would not surprise me at all. And cheer, point about my parents yeah here we go my mother tried to sit there with her family values in puritanness and prudish behavior and justify Donald trump fucking uh stormy daniels and the playboy bunny like she was we got in a huge fight it was it was like it was probably three years ago it was definitely before the election but we knew he was running and i mean we got so heated we didn't even sit on the same side to watch the basketball game because it it ended up that she couldn't defend it and she's like well da da da da da da that like started saying well we don't know that's true i'm like we fucking know it's true like we're off so anyway i think the

furry party i would there would be some type of made-up excuse but i do think just based on my experience the entire the boys will be boys the locker room talk get out of jubes jail free card for men in my upbringing, at least, was rampant. Totally. So I think that's probably like boys can do, you know, boys will be boys, that kind of thing. That would be what I guess. But I mean, there's no defending it. So you just sputter around and get mad and then we're both mad and that kind of thing.

So zero progress is what I mean. All right, listener, I think everybody knows that pumps and I are completely obsessed and consumed with our pets and an integral part. part of me being what I aspire to be, which is like the top tier best pet owner is my subscription with Chewy. Chewy has over 100,000 products from all the brands my pet loves at prices that I love. Food, treats, beds, you name it, they have it and it gets shipped directly to my door in one to two days. And it's not just for dogs. They have cats, bird, fish, reptiles, and so much more.

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that helped me get through the whole thing was my Lola blanket. And as I'm sitting there snuggling under it, I thought, this would be the most perfect gift. So I told my son, you should get your girlfriend a Lola blanket for Valentine's Day. They are so cozy. They are so soft. My favorite part is their machine washable. And it's always exciting to give something that you love to somebody else for Valentine's Day. Lola isn't just a blanket. It's a home upgrade gift. It instantly elevates any space, making it feel warm, cozy, and styled. Listeners, for a limited time, our listeners can get 40% off, select Lola Blankets products with Code Had It at checkout. Just head toloplanckets.com and use code Haddit. After you purchase, they'll ask where you heard about them. Please support our show

and let them know that we sent you. Wrap yourself in luxury with Lola Blankets. Okay, up next we've got Ian. Hello, Jan, hello pumps. Hello to the lean sheen, bean, clean, Kyle's. I hope you all are eating down this fine day. I'm calling because what I've actually had it with is I work in retail. And the days are long, the days are grim.

But I've had it with these bitches that come in and want to do something outside the policy. And I'm not going to lose my job. So I tell them no. I tell them why. I give a very firm answer. And by the time we've had our 20-minute debacle and they realize they're not getting what they want, they hit me with something along the lines of, well, you've lost a very valuable customer that spends a lot of money here. I'm going to go to X, Y, Z company and spend my coin there. I don't give a fuck where you spend your coin.

And quite frankly, I would be honored if you never spent it here again. So tired of those bitches seems to be an up kick of those in Trump's America. So checks out. But hope you all are slaying. Have a great day. I have to say, Poms, when he first said, But it's just that come in and want to do something outside of policy, you know who I thought of. Me.

Me. Yeah, because when we go, okay, when we're in the same city, we go to eat at this, it's not an expensive taco shop. It's not fancy. It's just kind of what you see is what you get. You line up. And Ponce has a problem with the queso order. And it is a, it is such a twati, like, and we would like chips and casso. and I would like the queso extra hot, and I mean temperature hot.

And then the lady will read the order back at the end. She's like, and make sure that queso is extra temperature hot. Thanks. And I'm always like, I want to crawl under the table. And I will like, one time I went in and I ordered the chips in caseo, and I did not ask for it extra temperature hot. And it came to the table and I ate it. And I was just waiting for her.

She'll take it. And she'll march back up and then go, I need this microwave. It's not temperature hot. And that's outside of the policy, in my opinion. Now, if this is a boozy ass, the casso is like $4. Okay, but I do think hot queso is within the policy. When queso is served in, it's supposed to be hot. So that is, that falls in the policy.

I'm not going to take that. Now, other things I would take, but not the case is. It's so funny. I mean, I think there's a really good argument to make that, and here's the deal, it's not cold the casso but pumps wants it piping hot the top of it has a sheen like when you put the chip in you can see it it's not hot it's not hot it's outside the policy cold but here's the thing i just think i love that call so much because when somebody says well i i spend a lot of money here and i'm not doing it anymore i just immediately think c-u-n-t-t-t

peace out bitch. Like if you have to tell me what a big dick you are, take it. You can have it. Yeah. And it's just it kind of feeds into that whole entitlement narrative, the princess syndrome, white woman that they think because ideally, you know, every customer should be treated the same, whether they've spent thousands or, you know, 10 to 50 dollars. Everybody's entitled to the same service, the same rules, the same. And it's that princess syndrome. that a lot of white women have that are super entitled that think they can treat workers a certain right. And I have noticed, I think there's a trend of male carons that goes completely skipped over all the time. I think it's such a misogyny that it gets zeroed in on women a lot. And women are

cunts. There's no question about it. But men are cunts too. And I have seen a lot of male careening in my day, a lot of it. I have seen just like where, where you're, a man is talking to somebody who's making minimum wage at their job and they don't like the rules, the policy like our caller is saying. And these men freak out bad. And they get a pass on on being this way a lot. And so I think there's some misogyny there that we need to. I think the caller, he probably works in retail where the women come. I'm not saying the caller is that. Ian Darley. I'm not talking about you. I was talking about in general. I think there is a rise of male Karenism that is fed and fueled by the brosphere entitlement. And so I just want to make sure

we're bashing on them equally because I've seen a lot of male carons. I think that's a great point that you make because we never do talk about it and you're 100% right. It's out there. And it's, I mean, all of it's gross, but I feel like men are extra shitty. I also think that's related to dick size, but that's a whole other thing. I'm just going to keep that penal shaming going. All right, let's do one more call. Okay, up next we've got Talia. Jen Pumps Kylie.

First of all, I want you to know that in every way, shape, and form, I'm completely politically aligned. However, I'm not calling in quote unquote with a political issue, although it could be adjacently political. I'm sure it has something to do with Republicans. I have had it with the amount of hair I've been finding in the food I eat when I eat out. It is on a dramatic increase. And I'd like to bring back the idea of wearing some fucking hairnets.

Okay? I know they're not popular. I know they're not popular. I'm sure everybody in the kitchen doesn't want to be wearing them. But I don't have to worry if I have to dig through my fucking ravioli while I'm eating out to make sure. someone's, you know, excess isn't in my dish. Okay? I'm fucking tired of it.

So let's bring back the her dance. Agree. I'm in. Okay. Let me ask you this. In the 80s, pumps growing up, did you ever go eat at the cafeteria?

Oh, yeah, all the time. So it was a big thing. Like, we would go to the cafeteria, and you go with your parents, and you get your tray at the end, and then you get to go through, and you get to get, you know, what you want.

And at the end, remember the ice teas and the ice waters, the ice had been sitting there forever and it was kind of melted. Yeah. And so it was just like it was an American suburban experience where you go eat at the cafeteria, but everybody had hair nets. There was no potential for loose hairs to get in the food. And I think she brings up a very valid point. And I also would further agree with her that I do think that it would be a,

Republicans would probably contribute to this more than Democrats. I don't know why that, but I just know that. I can't give an explanation, but I just know it in my opinion. I feel it. Do you feel it, pumps? I feel it for sure. It's hair and food at restaurants is way up under Trump. You know, I kind of miss cafeteria. I was missing the cafeteria the other day where you got the half,

you got a half a serving of the meat and then you got. Yeah. I loved that. Did you ever do the fish with tartar sauce? a fish with tartar sauce. I did too. I'd always get the fish with tartars. Would you do a chocolate pie at the end or a jello? I would do a jello, but I also always got the jalapino cornbread. So I would instead of peanut dessert, I did the hallipino bread was delicious. It was like a brick with lots of butter. Lots of better. I'll tell you what I did the other day on the down low now that you've left

me from my daily lunch dates. Guess where I went. I mean, and I just could not even believe as I pulled in. Olive Garden? No. I went to the Chinese buffet that's been there for 100 years. I went and I'm just going to tell you I've been back since. I was like I just missed a buffet. I just got a little bit of this, a little bit of that and I just really loved it. I really like a buffet.

I mean, that was the great thing about the cafeteria is it's a buffet but they serve it to you. So there's not this risk of fellow buffet users. that haven't washed their hands, that just jacked off and didn't wash their hands, that just shook hands with a trumper, that is a trumper, that, you know, it was contained. The food was contained. You were on the other side of it with this, you know, glass partition and you had your little tray and very skilled, highly trained, highly qualified food dispensers with their hair and hair nets kept that thing running, I mean, like a conveyor belt.

And I just think that the cafeteria is gone. It's just, it's gone. And it was just such a big part of, a big part of my family's dining experience growing up. For sure. We would do that and then we'd go to the mall with our color made beautiful books. And, uh, yeah, you're welcome. I love that.

All right, that's all we have. Pumps. Oh, listen, this is super important. Make sure you send us voicemails. You go to our Instagram. You go to the DM, you click microphone, I guess. I don't know the exact, but y'all are cooler and more hip and more technologically advanced. You'll figure it out and you hit sin and then Kylie will have it and Seth will have it. And you'll get featured on America's Top DEI podcast for even our haters give us five stars.

Because we look better than they thought. All right. We will see next Tuesday and Thursday. Listen up, Patriots, Gaytriots and Natriots. We have a new podcast that has dropped. It's called IHIP News. It's Monday through Friday every day, 15 to 20 minute hot takes on the political landscape of the United States of America always served with a side of petty grievances.

We are on all the available platforms, Apple, Spotify, Google, whatever you get your podcast and YouTube. Please go rate, subscribe, and reviews so that we will chart upwards with America's greatest legal mind, pumps. Pumps, what does an eagle say? Ciccah! A little bit more enthusiasm. Caca! That's it. That's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's, that's the patriotism that this country needs right there.